#but i digress at the end of the day having fun is really what matters

[oifaaa]

Ocs are mostly good and do deserve more attention.

strongly agree | agree | neutral | disagree | strongly disagree

While I agree alot of ocs are good evil little shit ocs do exist and they deserve just as must attention as the good ones do

[gotham-daydreams]

How would the yan batfam celebrate reader's birthday after they got them back?

Well, it can go a few ways, but I'll try to keep it short and simple for now!

First, the family will 100% fight over if they should throw a party now or actually wait until your birthday, because they definitely don't want to try and make up for all the one's they've missed, along with some other occasions that they absolutely want to celebrate with you.

It's a real mess, but what could one really expect from such a dysfunctional family? Though no matter what they settle on, it really depends on how long you've been with them.

If you've just 'gotten back' then it's probably something small, as they don't want to overwhelm you and want this to be another piece that eases you into your new way or life. Yet it definitely seems like some didn't get the memo as you are overflowed with gifts. You don't understand how they picked half of this stuff out, let alone why they bought it for you, but that's probably because they're guilt got to them and suddenly they had five times the amount of gifts they were originally going to get you. If the amount of gifts in the room pisses you off or you generally have a negative reaction to it, no one will let you go into the hall for a good portion of that day.

Besides that, you get some breakfast in bed, and maybe even lunch too if you didn't like the gifts- but expect a family dinner at the end of the day. They'll find ways to spend time with you, and most of the activities are either games that require multiple people, or the others will just... watch. Which may not have been so bad if you were in this particular situation.

Overall, while it is a little toned down they do still find ways to 'sneak' themselves into your birthday, and try to have fun all throughout the day. Though if you want to keep things more lowkey, then that's fine! But you'll still have to deal with them hanging around. You won't get a single moment to yourself.

If you've been 'staying' for a while, then they go all out and have the biggest celebration they can without any outside eyes peeking in. It may not be necessarily loud or anything but it's... a lot.

The moment you wake up (to which, you're most likely woken up by someone), your dragged out of bed and just about everyone is up and about like it's Christmas (and maybe it is, but I digress). Every meal of the day feels like some kind of feast, and they aren't trying to even hide the amount of gifts they've gotten you, which somehow all pertain to your interests one way or another. If anyone gets the same thing then you get to see a bit of a fight- so at least there's that, but unfortunately it's unlikely to last very long as everyone wants today to be a good day for you (and a great day for them).

Every activity/game is a family activity or deals with multiple players. They all take turns if there isn't enough for all of them to play with you all at once, but they work around it one way or another. If you want things to tone down, then you're either stuck watching a movie with everyone, or in a cuddle pile with most of the Batkids. If you couldn't get rid of them before- you absolutely cannot now. They make it near impossible to do so.

If you'd like to keep up your tradition with Alfred and bake with him, then you're more than welcome to!

If you 'just arrived' then you may be able to bake with Alfred in peace, minus the new observers that are a little too keen on watching you, and all too eager to taste test what you and Alfred end up making.

If you've been there for a while, then the family will try to turn the tradition from just you and Alfred, to you and the whole family. Even if it means turning the whole things into a game of some kind, or using other methods to get you to bake with them, they'll find a way to change it eventually... unless Alfred gets in the way of things. Though sometimes he may get sick and can't help you with the rest of the Batfam :[[

All in all, it's a mess! Who could've guessed? Ah, but really, it goes just about as well as you'd think. Very overwhelming and them justing to shove and further include themselves into your life by using your birthday to enhance that force. If you've just arrived, the force is lighter, and if not? It's heavier. Much, much heaver.

[randomlywanderingmoth]

Part of the problem with Fate Grand Order is the core gameplay is fundamentally flawed, and it's very difficult to restore "a fun game" around a flawed core.

Quick and Buster and Arts were all interesting notions, and could have mapped into action gameplay (if we were to merge FGO's ideas with FSR's gameplay I would equate them to fast attacks, heavy attacks, and weaker attacks meant to charge your special bar, but I digress).

As it is, though, it just makes for unpleasant feelings in gameplay, demanding optimizations (I would point out that in the international release we only recently got the ability to combo all three together, and made Quick chains strong enough to consider independently). Those optimizations rise up around every aspect of the game; only a select few Servants have the ability to AoE without accessing their Noble Phantasm, and they haven't even made it to international. There's a wide range of Craft Essences, but only a few that ever matter. Creativity in builds is tamped down around increasingly narrowed build notions as the devs design with over-optimized teams in mind.

The end result is a game that, optimally, advises you to use your super rare fully powered optimized support, your friends' identically super rare fully powered optimized support, and a high power damage Servant, and repeatedly fire the damage dealer's Noble Phantasm to either clear waves or kill bosses.

Speaking of which, from a lore perspective, this is also completely messed up. By the lore of the Nasuverse, a Noble Phantasm is a Servant's super secret ultimate move, only meant for the final hour. This is fully incongruous with the gameplay, where you typically throw the same world-ending mythology-defining techniques three times in a row and call it a day. (Entertainingly, in the International release, we've also made it to Traum, where we see faceless Servants fire their Noble Phantasms like simple artillery, but that's its own commentary.)

Like, it's so effortless to imagine better systems than this! Servants deployed on a chessboard-like map, heralding back to the themes of Fate Apocrypha; suddenly we don't need anything as mechanically obtuse as Class Advantages when we could organically differentiate each Class by how they navigate the board or how they fight each other (Riders can leap over enemies like knight pieces in chess; Archers can attack at range without moving; Lancers do really well on Attack but have poor Defense; and Berserkers can be the units of terror that lore implies!)

Alternatively, the Grail Battlefronts we've already seen- rework the entire game to operate more organically like that; maybe Servants can use skills without entering combat, but it exhausts their actions. Then different forms of gameplay can exist beyond just "mulch the enemy"; like "defend this location" or "collect these resources" or "defeat This Particular Foe".

Or, even if we had to work with just the system we have! Change THAT! Rather than select three cards from a set of five, have it go down the list; each Servant gets One Action to either pick from "Quick, Buster, Arts, Use A Skill".

As for Servant Customization, walk it all the way back, all the way back up to the Attack/HP boosting. Make it so that players can individually optimize Servant performance in different ways- this Servant has better output in Arts, that Servant has higher Crit Star generation. And for folks who'd already spent their Fous, you could just say "right, so anybody with Fous spent can now allocate those points into these new Stats! No harm done!"

Of course, in order to do this, they would likely need to construct a whole new framework for their game, whilst preserving the progress people have made until now.

Then again, they are presently building castles in the sand during the rising tide with one hand and bandaging bullet wounds with the other, so maybe a long shot like that is what they need.

[stuffzwithazz]

little hu analysis time!

i love hu, she’s grown on me a lot since pt2 dropped ehehe heh i’d like to make a formal apology to her for thinking she was the culprit for a year

this is just an analysis about hu’s secret/secret quote because i’m a freshman sem 1 psychology major and i like this stuff ^^

spoilers for drdt obviously ^^

tw for suicide

as a quick recap: hu’s secret is “you were quite the hopeless child. dying once wasn’t enough, so you attempted suicide 3 times” and her secret quote is “i want to pay for what i did. but i still want to live” (something like that)

i’ll start w the secret quote bc it’s the simpler one^^

by “pay for what i did” i think she means laying up her life as comeuppance for her actions, whatever they might be. now im not sure if by attempted, it’s failed attempts or hu wanting to but chickening out at the last minute. either way my point stands

now onto the secret!! this is a bit of assumption and i could just be looking into it wayyy too much but ykw? its fun!

there’s one specific phrase i’d like to look at: “*dying once wasn’t enough*, so you attempted suicide 3 times”

if the wording is meant to be very specific, then this raises a question. those question being; what does she mean by “dying once”?

for this next part: spoilers for both corpse factory (the game) and the silent patient (a book by alex michaelides)

i’ll explain it in brief terms w/out any spoilers after those sections dw!! i just like using examples for things

CORPSE FACTORY SPOILERS:

near the end, noriko talks about aoi’s childhood and how aoi is under the impression that noriko’s childhood was better (it wasn’t but i digress) noriko mentions aoi said something like “my dad killed me, but i killed him, so it’s okay.” ignoring the last bit, what does aoi mean by “killed me?”

aoi’s dad was quite the violent and both verbally and physically abusive guy. there are things that people can say that are equivalent or even worse than being stabbed or shot upfront, like things such as

(tw for verbal abuse(?) i actually dk how to categorize these im sorry)

“i wish you were never born” or “i wish you died instead of ____!!”

these things hurt like hell, and in some cases you feel like it would have been better to literally be murdered

SILENT PATIENT SPOILERS

near the end of the book, alicia recounts the experience she had growing up with her dad and how one day, he killed her. sound familiar? it’s a similar story to what happened with aoi. then, when alicia writes in her diary about what theo did 5 years ago, she brings up this specific thing: theo had made gabriel choose between himself or alicia post finding out gabriel was having an affair w kathy. gabriel chose his own life over alicia’s, therefore proving he did cheat and shattering alicia’s hopes that gabriel really did love her. in her mind, it felt like being killed. again. in her words, “the dead doesn’t speak. gabriel has sentenced me to death.” hearing that the man who she loved for so long was going behind her back and would choose his life over her’s, when she knew she would value his is worse than being just brutally killed.

(SPOILERS OVER!!)

being said something so hurtful it feels like a stab in the stomach is a similar feeling that i think is the reasoning for the specific words of “dying once wasn’t enough”

im admittedly a bit sad that hu’s secret wasn’t talked about whatsoever during the trial, especially considering its subject matter, but it’s what she wanted so it’s okay

again, all of this is purely speculation on my part, and o could just be looking into the wording a bit too much…

ok analysis over!! lmk what you think ^^

[vivid-vices]

hello hi, wanna go off a bit about mori-san? whatever you want to say, just have fun~

hi :) i always wanna talk about mori!!

i can't stop thinking about the disconnect between mori and dazai that comes from mori projecting onto dazai so hard. like when they first met dazai was very much like mori - obviously much more disinterested in life but he didn't have any close human connections and was able to follow mori's commitment to the ideal solution because of it. but through chuuya and ango and especially oda, he came to develop strong bonds with people that mori simply doesn't have. and mori didn't predict that.

dazai's words to fyodor about not trusting anything you can't control could apply equally to mori. he's a chess master and the city of yokohama is the board and the mafia members are his pieces. he treats them well, doesn't carelessly throw away lives, but at the end of the day, they have a purpose to serve. and oda - he was barely a pawn. he was so underutilized. mori doesn't have the kind of relationships that would allow him to prioritize true friendship, to value people outside of their usefulness. he expected dazai to follow his logic and ultimately understand the purpose of the sacrifice.

except dazai loved oda. and oda threw a wrench in all of mori's careful planning by telling dazai to escape to the light.

because maybe, maybe, mori could've predicted dazai going off to sulk and be angry for a while before ultimately coming back to the mafia, because what else did he have in life before oda gave him a purpose? but when he first heard that dazai joined the agency, it had to be a complete shock. a slap in the face, honestly. his greatest tool, his most competent executive, the boy he trained and taught and led for four years, now part of an enemy group because of his own actions.

that had to sting a bit. not even close to enough to regret getting the permit, of course, but for mori as a person, it had to be painful.

but mori would probably never acknowledge that emotion. it was for the good of the mafia, of yokohama as a whole, after all, and that's the only thing that matters. outwardly, at least.

i think mori is a deeply lonely person and dazai was one of the few people who made a dent in that loneliness - part of the reason why elise now copies some of his personality traits. (and i could make a whole post about elise, i love her so much. elise is such a reflection of his loneliness. you don't create an entire person if you have healthy relationships and aren't a control freak, but i digress.) but his biggest failure was in thinking that dazai was equally lonely, equally alone, and equally willing to put the organization over everyone and everything.

because mori has nothing else other than the mafia. it's both his home and his prison. like he said to chuuya, he's both a leader and a slave to the organization. that will never change.

and as silly as it sounds to blame the difference between them on the power of friendship, it's the only thing that separated dazai from ending up just like mori. except dazai has a capacity for cruelty that mori doesn't and if oda hadn't told dazai to leave the mafia, i think we would've seen the results of that immediately after his death.

anyway. i'm insane about mori and dazai. i think about them so much. their dynamic is one of my favorite relationships in bsd because of the range and ambiguousness of it - it's never even close to familial, way too casual for typical boss/employee while still definitely not friendly, dazai was a complete brat to him most of the time while mori was just amused, and now there's this one-sided absolute hatred while mori holds zero resentment towards dazai so you can't really even call them enemies. there's no label for whatever they have going on. and i'm not normal about it. at all.

[hazshit-hotel-hater]

The way substance abuse has been handled on the show thus far genuinely upsets me and reeks of writers who either 1.) don't understand the subject matter they're presenting and haven't done even the bare minimum to research it or, worse, 2.) simply don't care.

Apologies for the slight rant incoming, your comment about how it has been mostly "handled" off-screen got me going because that's 100% true and in that truth is such a missed opportunity for the show. The way it has been handled winds up feeling incredibly shallow and juvenile at the end of the day, especially for a piece of media that is attempting to present itself as "adult" and navigate multiple incredibly sensitive topics. I'll try not to get into my own personal experiences and will speak broadly, but the show uses substance abuse more as a cheap character flaw to poke fun at or something to magically handwave away when it is inconvenient, rather than the life-altering, debilitating illness that it is.

Nothing about Angel's use is ever meaningfully explored. It's so (apparently) unimportant to his arc and development that one rude comment from Husk (a character who ALSO has a problem with gambling and alcohol that is never addressed) is all it takes for him to suddenly "resist temptation" and be shown as "recovered" (unless I'm misremembering). Or was he suddenly going to counseling off-screen too and its just another thing that will be told to us rather than shown? And how does Charlie even handle that at the Hotel (I'd be really interested in this as a moment for her character to have to grow/change too)? Does she even understand substance abuse and the many unaddressed systemic factors that can influence it? Or is the entire recovery process just shame based (because that works so well /s) combined with some more corny trust exercises? Why is this incredibly serious topic relegated to the background as if it's unimportant?

Recovery is hard. It is emotional and exhausting. Withdrawal (depending on what you're coming off of) can sometimes mean excruciating, unimaginable pain and in some cases people literally die. It is not a funny "ha-ha I take drugs because I'm chaotic and wild" quirk to be adored or glorified and it definitely should not be presented as something that can be wrapped up in a month or two off-screen without any development whatsoever. That's just insulting.

When you approach a topic like substance abuse and recovery, I personally feel you need to take in all sides of it. All the missteps that come with it (two steps forward one step back - mistakes are expected and okay), the self-loathing, the guilt and shame, the joy, the sense of freedom, the loss, and the best part of all: the incredibly difficult but liberating journey that is rebuilding your life and learning to love yourself and your body again, once you've chosen to be free and to live life.

Mad props to anyone who has ever battled this disease. You are strong, you are worth it and you are valued. Lol I am so sorry for going off here but I so appreciate you calling out the lack of exploration on this topic in the show. I guess I didn't even realize how annoyed and upset it was making me feel (praying this is coherent...).

This was absolutely coherent don’t worry!! Im really glad to see other people talking about this. I myself have not struggled with drug addiction but I have struggled with other kinds and as someone that studies a bunch of medical junk, I’d say I’m decently knowledgeable.

I’m mainly going to focus on Angel for this since he’s the main character I write for, but I assure you other characters addictions are also handled in my rewrite.

During the actual canon show, we don’t see Angel actually abusing substances that often; there’s a few times, most notably in episode 4, but from the rest of the show onward we hardly see anything. Yes in episode 6 they mentioned relapsing, which, mind you, was done horribly, but I digress. They touch on relapsing; Angel relapses, and then… what..??? What happened from that? I don’t feel upset or second hand guilt of any kind from this scene because we haven’t seen Angel’s attempts to stay sobre and off drugs.

His name is fucking Angel Dust. You don’t, I dunno, think that’d entail a higher dependency on drugs? Why do you think he named himself that?

About his name before anything else, the show has so much potential later on to talk about Angel picking out his drag name and why he chose that specifically. So much potential to explore how he views drugs and himself. He sees them as an escape and something “fun” to take his mind off of his actual life. When you die in a fucking coma and wake up in hell as a spider you’re going to want an escape. You will want to ignore reality. I am fully convinced Angel picked his name once he started performing because thats what he needed at the time. He needs to be like that to survive in hell. Angel is an incredibly mentally ill, troubled, traumatised, and unstable person, and being surrounded by so much intense negative influence only amplifies his current problems. I don’t mean to drag Vox in here but in my last redesign post I mentioned how very mildly bad people can become even worse people in hell because of the environment and this is no different for Angel. He’s been surrounded by crime and drugs his entire life and unable to live comfortably because of his sexuality. He has very likely been struggling with substances since he was a teen. Possibly even younger. He is not going to suddenly get over his addiction because of something like this. It could pave the way to him looking into dealing with it, but things like this can take years. I don’t remember when my addiction started; I’ve been clean for 2 1/2 years now I think, but the amount of relapsing and anguish I experienced while working towards that isn’t something that can be done in a few days or months. I still struggle with feeling like I deserve to say I’m recovering.

I’m hoping they tactfully handle this as they should, but my hopes are low. It’s okay to show a character relapsing. It’s okay to show a character feeling guilty. What matters is that the struggle is there to signify they’re trying. For a character with a song called “Addict” you really don’t see much of it. Drug and alcohol addiction is not a silly thing to just twiddle your fingers with and be like “well I guess thats over!” It’s incredibly insensitive to do so.

Whenever I write about Angel’s struggles with addictions, I focus on how small they can feel until you realise what’s actually happening. Just me talking about my rewrite again, but to get my ideas out here: Angel smokes often. He smokes at the studio when he’s stressed, he smokes at the hotel when he’s stressed, he smokes at in alleyways when he’s bored, there’s almost no location he won’t, but sometimes he tries to smoke less. His lungs aren’t the same as humans and technically he has 2 pairs of lungs, but smoking causes him to cough. This is painful in general and especially painful for Angel since he has barbs going down the back of his throat. Imagine choking on sandpaper, kind of like that. It’s painful, he doesn’t like the sound, Fat Nuggets REALLY doesn’t like the sound, and it’s an overall inconvenience, so he tries to stop smoking as much. Periods like this usually go fine for him until the stress returns or he starts to feel the withdrawal. Withdrawal from any sort of addiction is terrible, and in Angel’s case, just from not smoking it worsens his mental state further. He becomes irritable and stressed and that stress leads to wanting to smoke again to calm down. He may resist a few times and those times should be praised, but he gives in eventually. One cigarette to calm down becomes two, then three, and before he can process himself getting carried away, the entire pack is gone. It’s things like this that make addiction horrible. It’s something that deeply scared me when I was struggling. When I was struggling I was still in the mindset of “I can stop when I want to” and then being so suddenly hit in the face with the realisation that I’m not longer in control of this is terrifying. I could not stop when I wanted to. There were even points where I didn’t want to stop. Even just getting the smallest glimpse of this in an incredibly serious manner with Angel Dust would surprise me. To think the bar is this low on a show that seemingly prides itself on tackling such sensitive topics like you said is appalling. Your show shouldn’t have to be told how to write itself.

[panelshowsource]

yes on the 28th!! i'm excited because ALISON HAMMOND!!! every day i'm like whyyy do we not have her on more panel shows she is everything!

victoria spoke about it on her episode of taskmaster the podcast :)

all i know is she's been looking fly as ever — like always! but if she's changing things up a lil then good for her 😌

i would like to anon but they didn't rly have that many moments together on the show, like of substance that make a good gifset 😩 i did do these two! do you have another moment in mind?

omg YES LMAO

richard is so hilariously subtly shady, i love when someone makes the most wrong guess ever (usually during tablet games like the rich list and i'm terrible at dating) and richard does a very obvious scoff-chuckle and goes "yeah? [raises eyebrows knowingly] well [stifled laughter] you never know! let's see if that's right [stifled laughter]" like it just cracks me up — because somehow he's not smug at all despite being mr big brains and someone who teases others a lot

one thing i love about hog is how much richard loves hog — like, that's his baby, he loves doing that show, and he is so obviously having the most fun every single week, which makes it even more fun for us imo!

wow great question!

i have a lot of nostalgic love for comedy world cup — i love david tennant, he's so affable and very funny and a lovely host, and i think that format had legs even if it didn't make it in the end. also from around that time i remember liking mad mad world on itv, which was suddenly cancelled mid run? with paddy mcguinness, rhys darby, rufus hound... —

sorry to digress for a second but remember on some recent podcast ep when sam campbell was like "what's rufus hound up to" and i think it was ed gamble who laughed his ass off lmaooo i feel like there's rufus hound tea out there but idk what it is. anyways

— ...i would love to check it out again but i can't find it! i'll work on that 🤔 then, of course, you have been watching hosted by charlie brooker. it would not have been as strong a format if it wasn't for charlie writing the show and clearly having many topics & rants he wanted to go in for, but i loved that series and saw quite a few comedians/personalities, including vcm, josie long, holly walsh, and peter serafinowicz, there for the first time :')

looks like i had a lil trip down memory lane!

i think it's great! i'm not crazy about dylan llewellyn — i am not super into derry girls, and i felt, at times, his acting was lesser than the others' in a distracting way? is that just me? — but it hardly ruined the show or anything. the cast has GREAT chemistry and jon pointing is a standout (though he doesn't pass for his 20s at all lmao), and i love seeing izuka hoyle who i loved in boiling point and is so(!) gorgeous. tv comedy lives and dies on its editing, and big boys really understands its structure and its beats. i'd also say it strikes a rare balance in its absurdity and its sincerity, which is some of my favourite ever kind of film & tv. god, i just love sad boi comedy. or sad anything. i'm a "let's watch this and cry🤩" kind of person no matter my mood LOL

btw did you see victoria coren mitchell also loved big boys?

sure anon i put it on google drive here :)

i'm not going to host this one but you can request it here and someone will definitely have it to share with you asap! sorry for the inconvenience but lmk if you have any questions :)

—————

PANEL SHOW WATCH LINKS / NON-PANEL SHOW WATCH LINKS FAQ / TAGS / ASK

[barrenclan]

i feel like it’s only right to start this one by saying this issue gave me silly warm feelings inside, something i hardly expected from the same comic where the protagonist dug up a skeleton. exactly what i had needed on a warm day

i can’t help but be proud of slugpelt. that one time cleaning with pinepaw and (nightberry?) must have really opened her eyes, and to the point where she realized she should be honest about their father? agh. her starting slow but getting more into the story? you can really see how important cashew was to her before he ditched her.

on that topic, i’m throwing cashew into the paper shredder. or a nut cracker, that might be more fitting. he saw slugpelt as a thing to have fun with!!! he toyed with her feelings bc he thought it was fun!!!!! he never cared about her!!! it came to the point where she thought she could trust him more than the brother she was raised with and i think she had a good relationship with!!! jesus christ!!!! awful kitty!!!!! awful bad kitty!!!!!! i hope he falls into a ditch and becomes one of the skeletons!!

the pinepaw coming out scene, ugggh. how he feels somewhat obligated due to the secret sharing family moment, and his immediate regret and guilt and shame for being ‘different’, and being pulled out of that when his mother comforts him with her muzzle. slugpelt, who hardly interacts with him, comforts him with her muzzle. that scene felt so special because of it, they’re all coming out of their shells and it’s so special. and slugpelt saying how she’s never heard of it before, but that doesn’t matter to her and she doesn’t think he’s weird??? that hit close to home personally which probably aided in my warm fuzzies, but i digress. his family is soo supportive and it makes me so happy, everyone in their own way with asphodelpaw being like “haha yeah the way u look at cormorantpaw makes it obvious hahahaha” and daffodilpaw being all “omg us moment”. i enjoy they all don’t act the same, it really cements how different they all are but how like this they’re still able to come together

it ending with it seems like a crack was sealed? my hEART. i want nothing but the best for this family oh my god. i love these warrior kitties i need them all to grow big and strong and for slugpelt to attend a therapist. actually all of them need a therapist probably

thanks for another good issue!!!! patfw means so much to me this issue is gonna sit in my head for the day

Heheh, this is a comic of both horrors and funtimes! We gotta have a good balance.

YEP that was exactly the moment, from Issue 15! When she realized that she was falling into her mother's patterns due to the neglect she suffered from her partner, and made an effort to turn way from it.

Cashew's a bad little man. I appreciate your righteous anger towards him, it's exactly what he deserves.

I'm so glad you liked the coming out scene, I played around with that one a lot to make sure it felt right! It was also important to me that all of his family members would react in different ways, but in the end they're supportive of him. It makes me really happy that you're enjoying the story. :)

[rawliverandgoronspice]

hi! firstly, sorry in advance for the long ask. your blog is very thought provoking! secondly, i wanna say i really appreciate all your writing on totk - i’ve kinda deliberately avoided looking at any critiques of the game because, quite frankly, i had a fun time in the moment while playing it and i didn’t want to sully that experience, but your posts have all been quality and have given me a lot to think about with respect to the narrative, its aims, and whether or not “pure, uncomplicated, escapist fiction” is actually a good thing

i digress though - the subject i wanted to ask about, which comes up both in your general “all the consequences were undone and therefore nothing mattered” stance, and more directly in your post about dondons/humanity/morality (specifically the part about “should we trust the bargainer statues that nothing matters? or should we actually care about light vs dark?”) is kind of the age old sentiment that the journey is more important than the destination, and how you think about this in the context of zelda as a narrative, as a defining game in the adventure genre, and now as a landmark in the open world style

in the case of the bargainer statue, i was thrown by you framing “trusting the statues about morality” vs “being moved by the struggle of light against dark” as an either/or - a grimly nihilistic view. in the game (and, i think, in real life), the message is that the ultimate futility of everything does not invalidate the reality of people living their lives in the present, and a positive nihilism challenges us to try and help people and do good in spite of that meaninglessness. this is why the bargainer statues feel so bizarre and un-zelda-like (or at the very least, un-hyrulian. not a bad thing!) - the universe of zelda has always at its core been about how helping other people is a noble endeavor and is its own reward (with gratitude in skyward sword actually manifesting this physically), and the bargainers’ ambivalence flies in the face of this. it’s obvious to us as the player that towns being destroyed and lives being torn apart is objectively bad, even if everyone ends up as a poe in the depths either way, and the bargainers reading as sinister and alien actually reinforces this more than it calls it into question. the quality of the time spent in life matters, even if the ending looks the same

as a game, i think zelda has always been at least as much about the stories and connections you experience on your quest to deal with the big bad as it is about that actual climactic fight. it’s always leaned into the adventure half of “action/adventure,” and in some ways i do think this is what “gameplay before story” originally meant. as you’ve noted, some of the brightest points of totk are the sidequests and characters for whom you can make a small but noticeable difference, and through which you’re driven to interrogate the world and maybe yourself too. and it’s because of these connections that reverting things at the end doesn’t make everything futile and pointless. link is our connection to hyrule, and if the adventure impacted us positively, then we can infer that it impacted link (and to a lesser extent, zelda) positively as well, and that’s worthwhile even if the external circumstances change

a last quick point is that i think the increasingly open world nature of the series also reinforces this - sure you can run naked straight to castle and beat ganondorf without engaging with the game in any way, and you’ll save the day the same as someone who put in 300 hours on the way there, but your takeaway will be completely different, because that journey is the entire point

anyways thanks again for your thoughtful posts and for reading this far if you did!

Heyy thank you so much for perusing my blog and leaving such a thoughtful ask, it's greatly appreciated! <3

That's interesting you took the Dondon post in that way, as it wasn't what I meant at all haha. But I do recognize it was worded in kind of a cryptic way, and left it up to interpretation perhaps a tad too much (see: the limits of subtext), so I can try and make myself a little more clear (and I also think you bring up really good points that completely deserve to be mentioned and that I personally do not mention nearly enough)

What I meant by the "either/or" isn't what we, as an audience should take away as what's important or meaningful, and completely discard the other part as useless. It's not what we experience ingame, and this contradiction is inherently interesting and sparks some degree of conflict (good! storytelling need those and totk is conflict anemic honestly)

What bothered me is that we are prompted, in the game, to see things in an extremely black and white way in spite of an argumentation that maybe, we shouldn't. It's not bad in itself, I even think it's great that we get to question the moral fabric of the world! It's one of the very rare (in my opinion) compelling things about the narrative weaved out for us. But the endgoal of the game still remains the same: find Zelda, and swear yourself/all of your friends to Rauru's ancestral kingdom by using his powers and his guiding hand. Link's role in restoring Hyrule is never even hinted as being a potential question mark, or something we should ponder upon (Twilight Princess did directly question Hyrule in more ways than one, WW is also there, etc). But moreso than in other games in my opinion: we are doing the bidding of a king's territorial war that happened a very long time ago, and the current state of Hyrule doesn't seem to indicate the need for pushing a unified kingdom back onto everybody, or at least it wouldn't be a problem if not for Ganondorf's presence (which in of itself is still arguable as an argument for royal unity, since people would have been willing to band together for the sake of their own communities regardless of whether or not there was a unifying realm --remove the Sage's vow, and I don't believe Link's friends would have let him handle his fight on his own even without having to swear their alliegeance to what is basically a dead kingdom by this point).

My problem isn't the statues; it's that this Light/Darkness framing is only ever questioned when close to them/the Monster Brothers, and the rest of the world is extremely rigid in what is the correct path --but without the added tragic weight that other Zelda games generally have about this aspect (the Sages in OoT being torn from their previous aspect/your own lost childhood, Skyward Sword's Hylia and the way she enacts her plan through people who never had a choice --and that's identified as something bittersweet, not to mention the infamous curse of Demise...)

I do adore what you mention, this sort of "positive nihilism" as a staple of the series. It's never as apparent as in Majora's Mask in my opinion, where getting people comfort and rest is ultimately without consequence as you constantly reset their minds, but it still feels meaningful to have helped. I think BotW did that really well too --where you help people rebuidling life and meaning in the middle of the desolation, making the post-apocalypse hopeful, a place for potential growth and change and resilience and experimentation. In TotK, however, I don't think your efforts are as centered around making sure these people get a future as they were in BotW (except maybe, as you mentioned, in a couple of sidequests --Lurelin's village being one of them, for example). Maybe it's because Ganondorf's threat is not as clear as the Calamity's was, maybe it's because what guides your adventure is to find Zelda first and foremost rather than defeating whatever threatens the peace (treated narratively as a hindrance more than the core problem, even if it is ultimately the core problem --again, the narration/quest design is pretty messy here and it doesn't help matters), or maybe it's because the endgoal is not for people to make their own way into the world, but mostly for the wayward folk of Hyrule to be ushered back onto the glorious trail of Hylian/Zonai's legacy --but to me, the game has a weird agenda regarding Link/the player's role into this world that is generally tangential to his role as a hero and a balancing force in other legends. Here, he starts the game as a knight. His duty is to Zelda, but it ends up overlapping to what Zelda represents in a far more abstract way than usual.

What I think works in TotK in terms of "positive nihilism" is actually Ultrahand, and this gimmick of "world as playground", which I believe is a very clever and engaging way to imagine an open world. There are a ton of little gameplay moments that are yours to shape and inject meaning into; manipulation for the sake of it, the joy of play, and experimentation being rewarded and never punished. To me, this feels the most like inhabiting the world, making it your own, and doing things because they matters to you --and this being enough. But narratively speaking, this is just not really the story being told to us: we are told, us and basically every other NPC, to conform to a plan laid out for us that doesn't ever need to be investigated or questioned --even though now, at crossroad of what the future could look like, would be the perfect moment to do so.

I think what I ultimately tried to point out in that Dondon post is how jarring this hint that, perhaps nothing you do In The Name of Light actually means anything, and this having zero impact on the rigidity of the pupose you are supposed to accomplish In The Name of Light --and the game never seemingly acknowledging that paradox, which made for a (I think, unplanned) pretty oppressive playing experience on my end.

[characteroulette]

Apollo Justice is such a game.

Welcome to a seven year time gap!! Your client is actually disgraced (disgraced???) former Ace Attorney Phoenix Wright!! Your tutorial mentor man is a condescending bitch!! Apollo has zero control over any of the proceedings and in the end has to present falsified evidence to prove his mentor was the true murderer for reasons that won't become apparent until much, much later!!!

wanted to think more about what the fuck just happened?? Too bad!! Time for shenanigans to ensue in proper Ace Attorney fashion!!

Here's your assistant, the girl who gave you that forged evidence!! She's Phoenix Wright's daughter. Adopted. Here's a mystery man who looks nearly exactly like the man you just sent to prison for murder!!! Also Ema is back and she's PISSED! Klavier gets a proper intro and he's bitter as fuck!! Time to present panties twice in a row and turn this courthouse into a circus!! Your assistant holds herself at ransom just to explain the main mechanic of the game to you, despite having done this mechanic in the previous case. Your client is a lil punk and his fianceé is actually both way worse and more sympathetic than you first thought!! Hope you enjoyed having your hand held during the second trial day by this Klavier guy it will happen again.

Also, Klavier sent you tickets to his concert. Which Apollo had to pay for. What a weird series of events to get us to this concert. Lamiroir sure is pretty I hope nothing happens later to ruin her character!! Despite the murder weapon being a hand canon and the victim being a man who looks like a brick house, everyone stalwartly believes a tiny 14-year-old child performed this crime without so much as an injury to his name. Apollo watches a man die and is haunted by his final words. Surprise Lamiroir is acrually blind and accused the penis hair shark man to be the actual killer!! He hated your guts from moment one for some reason well now you know it's because he was the villain here. Have fun watching Klavier get lit on fire again and again at least 7 times. The most convoluted and unsatisfying breakdown and way to acquit your client yet.

Well, whatever. Final cases are supposed to be the best!! This Mason system seems weird but surely it has to explain some things. Phoenix Wright is our main narrator and all. Apollo actually gets his shit together enough to understand something is weird about all of this but he's got no other choice than to charge into it all headfirst. The most horrifying Ace Attorney character design with the most annoying tell to spot. Klavier fucking loses it and wuh-oh seven years ago time. Explain yourself, Phoenix Wright.

Upstart Klavier!! Zak spouting ominous bullshit that makes you realise he was planning to run no matter what!! BABY TRUCY!!! The last time we'll ever see Gumshoe in a mainline game... And, of course, as if you didn't already feel cornered by this game's lack of agency, it makes you present the forged evidence yourself. You helped get Phoenix disbarred. You had no other choice but to do so.

Anyway really fucking annoying investigation time!! Have fun figuring out which very specific order in which to do these snapshots!! Apollo and Trucy are siblings??? Whaaaaat?? BLACK PSYCHELOCKS??? What does it mean??? Phoenix has fully taken over the case it is no longer Apollo's show.

Back to the trial, your client could die but more importantly, Kristoph is back, baby!!! We're never going to learn what those psychelocks meant, you have to first stare at the scar on his hand making a face lol. Misham said he never met his client but Vera obviously met Kristoph in person so Drew either left her in a room with a questionable adult alone or was straight up lying on the stand about that. I mean Zak had the evidence that could clear his name in his pocket the whole time and chose to fucking dip instead of clearing himself of a murder charge so like same hat, but I digress. Klavier is having a TIME, Apollo doesn't get to say a damn thing as we close on the court, and wheeee that's it that's the game!! You get to choose the Not Guilty verdict yourself don't you just feel so included???

I want to make it clear that I love this game dearly, but woof it is. Such a ride.

[minquiec]

since you were kind enough to like the song i recommended you, i wanted to send you more ZZZ items i found useful. i have a distany memory of you saying you wanted to learn more about ZZZ's lore before developing more of your OC that you ship with Billy Kid and i have provided two videos for you to potentially help you out! no worries if you dont want to watch either for any reasons, all optional obviously. im just trying to be helpful with what is p rapidly becoming either a hyperfixation or a special interest, and i love the content youve made so far about it!

(video 1:) https://youtu.be/WaW6Sy8o6dI?si=ldFSS7w9qLFaMig2

this (⬆️ video 1) is a video that explores the lore about ZZZ so far without going into spoilers. i hope there will be a part 2 that does include spoilers at some point. but, as is, this is really interesting. and really succint at just 14 minutes

(which i find to be short, but all the other ZZZ lore and theory videos i have seen are all even shorter (guess there isnt much to lore to unpack so far, no matter how much i want to have everything ever in ZZZ all analyzed and explained in one video already as is). so this is both a baby and a biggie. but i like how little guessing at what could be in this video, as we instead mostly analyze what is currently in-game, is my point)

(video 2:) https://youtu.be/mR0s11XrSlU?si=6FYAUtF6iq7OxBod

and this (⬆️ video 2) is a video that compiles all the cut-scenes so far (it was posted within the last week) of the animated scenes, the comic-book-scenes, and other voice-acted scenes within ZZZ so far. it's very long. but ive been watching it in pieces over the past few days and have found it fun, but that's just me. im on hour 7. wild that there is THIS many scenes in a video of an app-game, in a video that doesnt even include any gameplay no less lol

but yeah! watching through these two videos have helped me understand ZZZ better and develop my own ZZZ OC. im still looking into lore and theory videos about ZZZ that aren't fully based on conjecture, and if i run into any more then i can let you know? only if you want tho. i dont wanna infodump unwarrantedly lol

hopefully, we will eventually learn Billy lore. do you have any theories or hcs about Billy yet?

i know his wiki confirms he is fully robot, just one who passed The Forbidden Fruit Test, but i was so convinced before that he used to be human lol and now i have a lot of hcs and curiosities about why he exists and who made him, but my biggest focus is the obvious "ohhh this bitch is functionally immortal, huh? he's going to outlive all his teammates unless he's killed or something" element. i wish we knew more about the Starlight Knights as part of said Billy lore, but as is i hc theyre like Voltron or outerspace Power-Rangers so that it can explain part of Billy's interest as then in part due to them using robots to save the world. maybe one or more of them IS a robot or cyborg even, idk lol

but i digress. i hope you have a good day!! 👋

OOOO THANK U FOR SENDING ME THESE that first one was insanely helpful 😭😭 bc half the time while I'm playing the game I zone out and just end up missing dialogue JAJDJS

Dw about infodumping JAJDJS I practically do that everyone bc I can't learn to shut up but YES FEEL FREE TO SEND MY WAY it's always a bit frustrating when a media is new cause there's just not that much confirmed information 😭 so hopefully we'll get more lore soon 🙂‍↕️

I'm not sure if you're seen but there's a character teaser released by hyverse where he talks abt being made from old technology and used to be part of a gang on the outer ring of new eridu (??) there's been some speculation it could be a new upcoming faction called sons of calydon since the insignia on their back is somewhat similar to the one on billys (?) but that's what I've seen other people speculate

I think he also talks abt being made as a combat android but its not clear who made him exactly or his exact purpose 🤷‍♀️

As for the starlight knight aspect from my personal opinion I think it's to play into his childish personality almost by giving him a silly interest akdjsk THIS PART IS A HEADCANON but in his teaser he also talks about 'gaining a taste of freedom' so I'm assuming he enjoys the show bc it's kind of him indulging in this freedom he's found if that makes any sense IDK KEFNKWKSN cause he's a silly character so they gave him some silly traits to make him an enjoyable character :]

But yea that's what I think so far I HOPE THEY CAN RELEASE MORE CONTENT SOON IM SO IMPATIENNTTT JAJDJJJD

This is the character teaser if you haven't seen already ⬇️⬇️

[slashingdisneypasta]

SecretLover!Prof. Aaron Callahan x Fem!Reader || Oneshot

Plot: What the hell kinda luck leads you and Callahan to finally decide to date- and then immediately end up with him subbing one of your classes that day??

Part 1 Part 2

Warnings: Teacher/student relationship and sexual references.

"You want... to take me on a date??" Blinking, you look baffled at him. "... we can't go out." You exclaim, completely incredulous. "That's the secret part of secret affair."

A smirk slides across Callahan's face, looking cocky as usual. Like he knows everything, the handsome bastard. "I was actually thinking I'd cook for you. At home." The smirk broadens. "See,.. I know the rules."

"Well you should, you did help to make them."

"Mmm," He groans, annoyance laced in the tone. "Actually I think that you took control on that- but I digress. What do you say? I've cooked for you before, after all,.. its not like I'll poison you... "

"Uh, I stole leftovers out of your fridge. I don't think that constitutes as you cooking for me- but-- " Shaking your head, you taking a deep breath and think; drumming your fingers against the bench.

The two of you have been getting along better; that Halloween event was so much fun, and not just the bathroom rendezvous, you actually loved talking with him-- but do you really want to let this become... more? What would you even call him after you went on a date? Date is a hefty four letter word, filled with expectations and assumptions and a 'where is this going' conversation that you are completely unequipped for.

Callahan is an ass, though. A cold, manipulative, narcissistic ass. So... maybe... you shouldn't??...

Your eyes flicker up to his face then, though, and your moment of sobriety is over. There's just something in him that you like all of a sudden and the past week since Halloween, you've been all for him. Shrugging nonchalauntly, you give a grin. You cant help it. "Yeah. Cook me dinner- what do you plan on cookin me, then?"

Giving fully-pleased grin, rolling his shoulders. "Let's call it a surprise." He teases, leaning in and dropping a slow kiss to the corner of your mouth, his hand fitting to your waist. "I'll see you tonight- dress uhh... " He gives you a once-over and you gape. Excuse you???- "better."

Excuse y- glancing down at your pyjamas, just a t shirt and shorts, you give a sad pout. These pj's are cute! Hmph. "You know, I like you at the moment but you're still on thin ice." With a matter-o-fact, deadpanned look on your face now, you take a deliberate sip of your coffee/tea at him.

"Uhuh, whatever. Bye." One final waist-squeeze from him and an almost-sincere smile (on one side of his face at least) and he walks on out of the apartment for the day.

~

What the HELL?

"Alright class, as you can hopefully tell I am not an English teacher," Professor Callahan stands at the front of your class after making an entrance of himself coming in (He couldn't quote a law & order but apparently he knows Hamlet- the Claudius bits) and you're closest to him in the front row so you're the only one who hears the next part even though he doesn't look at you. "and to be honest I look down upon and each and every one of you poor hippie losers."

What the hell is he doing in this class?? This is YOUR class!! He's a law teacher- Before you can think it through, your arm shoots up into the air. He sees you and nods to your hand. "Where's Mr Bradford??"

"Sick." He responds, and does not elaborate- he quickly looks back to the class in general. "Now, I want you to do the modules I write on the board and if you have a question... I don't care. Email your ailing teacher. Go."

Narrowing your eyes, you watch him turn and write the appropriate modules onto the board; using your eyes and mind power to insist he turn around... but he doesn't, not once. The jerk.

Finally when Callahan turns back to the front, gives the room once sweep with his eyes and then sits down at the desk to do his own work without even looking at you for a second you sigh and open your laptop to start the modules... awkwardly... and immediately see an instant message pop up in the corner of the screen. From Aaron- the name you put his contacts under when you realised other people might catch a glance of your messages or your calls and you didn't want them getting suspicious about a last name (Or 'the professor', which was another option that had passed your mind).

Aaron: Stop staring.

Huffing, you roll your eyes and immediately start typing out an answer.

You: Oh so you noticed me?? Interesting.

You: Couldn't tell.

Aaron: What do you expect? Am I supposed to walk into class and kiss you- then introduce myself as the professor for the day and expect everyone to respect me?

You: No one respects you. They hate and fear you.

When you glance up to see his reaction to that, you see a smirk slither across his face as he types back to you.

Aaron: So?? That's infinitely preferable.

For goodness sakes. Stifling a grin by pressing your lips together, you shake your head and open your classwork. Whatever, maybe you can just ignore him and get your work done today. Pretend you don't know him. Try not to think about the fact you were bent over your professors bed with him behind you in his teaching suit, well-

Woof... you think, eyes rounding and shaking your head again; trying to shake the memory out of your head. Okay, mind outta the gutter, lets do some work. Come on.

~

For the rest of the 3 hour class you shift between actually doing work and sending Aaron random messages to try and get a visible reaction out of him (He does react, but he's subtle. Just soft smirks, a couple of headshakes... the biggest responce you got was an eyeroll). No one else notices because they're all terrified of Callahan, and are actually doing their work.

When 3 o'clock finally fits and its time to leave for the day, everyone else starts filing quickly out while you casually just pack up your things at your leisure and wonder what you're going to wear for your date tonight when you feel a tap on your shoulder. Turning around, you see Lewis.

Lewis, the guy you went on a date with a couple of weeks ago and Callahan - Aaron, - got weird about it. Before Halloween and everything... sorta changed. As Lewis gives you a cute grin, his tucked into his back pockets you look to the professors desk and catch Aaron the manipulative bastard pretending not to notice the cute guy approach you; busying himself putting his things back in his briefcase.

"Hey, Y/N. Sorry, I know we've both been really busy lately so we haven't had a chance to catch up, since... " Here Lewis gives a shifty-eyed glance between you two, reminding you of the almost-risqué moment the two of you had when he kisses you goodbye after the date. A wonky grin wibbles across your mouth, thinking about the worse, down-right-scandalous things you've done with the other man in the room- nearby- listening in... "But, uh, I was wondering! Heh- if you wanted to go on a second date??.. you know- with me? The new Five Nights at Freddy's movie is out and I got tickets." Oh- he remembers you love Five Nights at Freddy's!, damn him. Damn him and that cute lop-sided grin on his face. "Whadaya say?"

... Oh. "Oh."

You should say yes.

Lewis is cute, and he's sweet (He gave you his spare copy of Freddy Vs Jason on your date for goodness sakes! You cant get much better then that), he likes Five Nights at Freddy's!... and what you said to Callahan (To Aaron) two weeks ago still stands. You want to be married one day, you want something with someone that can last-

... But right now all you can think is that you have plenty of time to find that. You're young and you have years, and right now all you really want to do is be with Aaron.

A week ago the answer would have been yes but Halloween night changed everything.

You hear the sound of a briefcase clipping shut and take in a sudden, deep breath. "... actually Lewis, I already saw it- sorry!! You can take someone else, can't you??"

Lewis's smile falters, but not in a pitiful puppy-dog way- in a 'well damn, that's a shame' kind of way. You like that about him, after all you only went on one date together and he barely touched you. "Ehh, no worries. Maybe we'll hook up some other time."

"Maybe!" Giving a genuine smile, you nod; noticing Callahan at his desk waiting impatiently for the two of you, the last remaining students in the room, to move it and get out. His briefcase is stood up straight on the desk and his fingers are drumming against the leather. He can definitely hear what's being said, too, since he's barely 10 feet away.... and looking right at you both- "Uhh... well I'll see you next class, Lewis!"

"Yeah, see ya." With a last arm squeeze, and a kiss to the cheek, Lewis gives you casual smile and leaves the classroom.

... After a moment of embarrassed silence in which you think about where to go from here... you quickly glance at Aaron for a moment and pull your shoulder bag on right over your head. "Well what are you lookin' at?" You ask boldly, then go ahead and try to just leave. Like uh-yeah-no-see-ya-later-bye-

But- "Uh uh uh, not so fast." You were, of course, greatly mistaken to think he was just going to let you leave after seeing that. Sighing, you stop in your tracks and look nervously back at him. "... what was that?"

"I'm sure I dunno what you mean, Professor." You give him a pointed look. "Just chatting with a friend."

"A friend?... " He raises a brow. "Huh."

Welp. That 'huh' doesn't sound great. "... 'Huh'?"

"Mhm. 'Huh'." He agrees, folding one hand into one of his pants pockets and looking... thoughtful. Dangerously thoughtful. Oh lord- "... as your professor I feel I should warn you, Miss L/N,.. boys at that age are- " He pauses, considering his next words. " - fickle. And inexperienced. And... q u i c k." The last word comes out slow and you want to laugh.

You try not to laugh, wandering over to the desk and looking pointedly at him again. "Sir... I don't think its appropriate for you to be talking to me about this, is it? I mean- " Quickly you drop the good student act. "Not unless you're gonna gimmie good grades for listening to your jealous garbage, at least." You shrug, dropping your shoulder bag to the ground with a teasing grin.

Letting out a chuckle, he smirks and runs his hand that's not in his pocket slowly, wryly over leather of his briefcase. "... what else would you do for a pass, sweetheart?.. "

A snicker slips out of your nose, shaking your head. "You're not really my real teacher, Aaron, you have no power over my education."

"Well that's true... Also means its not against the rules- if I do this." After leaning across the table, Aaron presses his lips against yours in a hot, slow open-mouthed kiss that makes you dizzy. And you let him, in your classroom, where you learn about American literature 5 days a week. You even reach over and wrap his red tie around your knuckles, stroking his tongue with your own. When he pulls back, only a couple inches, he can obviously see the fog in your eyes from his kiss and you can definitely see it in his. "Or, this." He goes on, beginning to press kisses along your jaw and down your neck in a way that makes it hard for you to keep yourself together. "Or... "

Oh, fucks sake here we go, you're going to fuck him in the classroom. Pulling back with huff, you slowly let go of his tie; slipping the smooth fabric through your fingers. Your eyes flicker slowly from his lips up to his eyes and back. "... Professor I changed my mind, I'll do anything for that grade."

With a mocking smirk so close to your face, so pleased to have a girl in a classroom, even if its not his, Aaron holds one side of your face and rubs your jaw fondly with his thumb. "Is that so?.. What a good student you are. Hmm... go lock the door."

"Yes sir." You grin, heading off to do just what you're told.

~

15 minutes later you leave the classroom with slick on your thighs and a warm feeling in your pants, as well a whole new appreciation for Wattpad authors and their vision.

[wordingg]

Any Way the Wind Blows by Rainbow Rowell

Any Way the Wind Blows by Rainbow Rowell is the third and final (?) installment in the Simon Snow series. I usually don't like YA series, but this was so much fun and I really loved every second of this series and I really hope that the author returns to it some day soon!

For a very quick synopsis of the story up until this point (and oh my god please scroll by quickly if you don't want too many spoilers for the first and second book), the Simon Snow series is sort of a meta answer to all the YA chosen one type stories that were so popular in my youth (I'm looking at you, Harry Potter). Simon Snow was supposed to be the chosen one, but in truth he was the source of the threat to the magical world. He has to come to terms with this at the end of the first book, when he realizes that he has been used by the Mage all along. The second book then follows Simon, his boyfriend, and best friend as they take a trip across the United States to try and draw Simon out of his horrible, spiraling depression after the events of the first book.

When the third book picks up, Simon is still in a very dark place. He is fully convinced that he no longer belongs in the magical world, that perhaps he was never magical to begin with and that the Mage only made him so with whatever he did to him when he was a child. He gets so down on himself that he breaks up with Baz, moves out of his apartment with Penny, and completely drops off the map. It doesn't help that Baz and Penny both have their own crises as soon as they're back in London. Penny still has Shepherd, the cute cursed boy she promised to save back in Arkansas, and finds out that her mother actually is not at all happy to help her figure out how to break his curse, which means it's up to her alone to help him. And, Baz comes home to find out that his stepmother has disappeared, leaving his emotionally constipated father alone with a gaggle of unsupervised children that he needs help with.

To make matters even worse, in the wake of the reveal that Simon is not the chosen one, a whole swathe of social media styled gurus and shysters have appeared claiming to be the chosen one themselves! And, some of them are even proving to be dangerous…

I think I just barely brushed the first fifty pages of this book, but I really don't want to spoil anything since this is the big finale!

This book was so great! I finished it, and then I pretty much immediately wanted to pick it back up and read it again. First of all, this book does a great job of wrapping up both Penny and Agatha's character arcs. Agatha isn't doing much better than Simon at the beginning of this book, but she has her own path to discovering her own worth and what brings her joy. And, Penny gets a chance to be an absolute badass and prove to herself that she doesn't need Simon to be amazing.

And then there's Simon and Baz. Simon is so messed up (and he should be!) by all the bad shit that's happened to him. Baz is too, but a lot of Baz's stuff is still kind of floating at loose ends, so I'm really hoping we'll get a follow-up or spin off or something with him! A girl can hope, right? But, I digress. This was really the "let me love you" story for Simon. His self-worth is in the toilet, and he can't see himself clearly at all. The whole book is Baz trying over and over to show Simon that he's loved and wanted, and it's so sweet it makes my teeth ache in a good way.

I know some people were put off by the second book, but if you have any interest in finishing the series at all, I really recommend reading this last book. It does such a great job of wrapping up Simon's story in a really satisfying way. But, yeah, much recommended! Comes with my seal of approval, for sure.

[northwest-cryptid]

YOURE SO RIGHT ABOUT GEBURA YOURE SO RIGHT ABOUT HER THANK YOUUUUUUUUUU

I think at this point I'm just one of the (seemingly rare?) people who actually like original canon versions of characters more than hyper-fandomized versions of characters.

I have nothing really against someone having headcanons or AUs or whatever, at the end of the day like I said; the characters aren't real people so no one is getting hurt by these sorts of things. However I do think that it detracts from the character as a character when the more popular headcanons or AUs for a character become the new "norm" for the core concept behind them.

I view fandom character interpretations almost like a Ship of Theseus issue. For those who don't know what the Ship of Theseus is, to keep it super summarized it posed the question "if we replace every component of this ship with the exact same stuff; is it still the same ship?" This is very much how I view fandom characters, but more in the "how much can you change before they are no longer the character they were originally."

In the case of the Ship of Theseus the parts were replaced with the same parts, on a ship parts get old and need to be replaced; that makes sense. However that's not true of a character, Gebura is going to be Gebura no matter how many years go by, no matter how many people play the game, no matter how wild the fandom interpretations get. When you boot up Lob Corp for the 800th time, the very same Gebura with the very same story and the very same lines is going to be there.

Yet so often we find that headcanons and AUs for characters become popular within Fandom communities likely out of a desire to see the character in a different light. There's arguably nothing wrong with that, but at which point are they no longer the original character?

Is Gebura still Gebura if we change her hair color? Well to me, sure. She still has the core design philosophy behind her save for the color theme which I think is an important aspect of overall design but I don't think it's a make or break for the character.

Okay but what if we made her dress all fancy like Chesed? See ironically now we're starting to get to that line, at least in my opinion; because no the way she dresses isn't necessarily any more important than her hair color, however you could argue that specifically dressing all fancy would go against her personality.

And that my friend, is the heart of a fictional character. I'd argue that's the heart of a real person as well but I digress. If we are to say she would dress all fancy, we're likely also getting into her general attitude towards things. She likely wouldn't be able to fight as well trying to do so in fancy clothing, it's a well known thing with fancy clothes that they're not exactly easy to move around in, at least not for combat. Do you really believe Gebura would give up combat ability for personal aesthetics?

If you say "yea absolutely!" We likely have vastly different concepts of who Gebura is as a character. Especially when you consider how much she hates abnormalities and yet she is shown to use Mimicry. This is to the best of my knowledge never really expressly said (perhaps I just missed it somewhere) but to me this has always shown that she will put the necessary for the greater good over her personal feelings towards something. She knows she can't hurt abnormalities without using an EGO weapon, and I'd argue of every EGO weapon out there, Mimicry is the most "abnormality-esque" compared to some that are just guns or whatever.

What I'm getting at with all of this is to say that I've never been one to tell someone they can't just Fandomize a character to all hell, characters aren't real, these concepts and ideas and themes about them are all just for fun. Though I have always felt like when it goes far enough to replace their core themes or core personalities or something, I've never really cared for those sorts of headcanons and such myself. I really don't headcanon characters at all. I don't really see the appeal myself, if I got rid of everything that made me like a character, or boil their character down to the bare bones essentials what I'm left with is an OC that I'm not willing to call an OC, because doing so would admit that the canon character is so wildly different from what I've created that they really don't fit the description anymore.

[couldbebetterforsure]

You know something I really have fun thinking about? Suzu and Kisa’s dating life post-Jack Jeanne.

Because, to my surprise, Kisa’s secret wasn’t revealed at the end of the route! I was under the impression she only had to keep her secret until the end of that first year. But from what I understand she has to hide her gender until she graduates? Which Kisa my girl good luck I’m rooting for you! But also that opens up the room for sequel talk so hey developers chop chop! The clock’s ticking!!!

Anyways I digress. Like I said with that tidbit in mind, Kisa and Suzu being a couple in the midst of all this makes things so much more entertaining to think about. Because they really don’t have anywhere nearby where they can relax and fully act like a couple. At school they spend most their time surrounded by others. And in the nearby towns for every person who sees them as a cute couple there are others who know them as a pair of Univeil students (probably worse postgame since the two of them made a name for themselves as Quartz’s new Jack Ace and Al Jeanne).

The most they can do is managing to steal away for short amounts of time to spend together. That or they have to be willing to do some traveling for extended couple time. But yeah it’s actually fun to think about how their dating life works out postgame because it’ll definitely take a lot of work for them.

But honestly? I don’t think either of them truly mind. Sure they probably might get bothered by it once in a while but for the most part? I think so long as they’re together they’ll be happy. They both love each other so much and are more than aware of said love, they’re already close friends and partners. And they share a dream of standing on stage together for all their days at Univeil. So yeah, while it’s difficult I think that so long as they CAN be together it doesn’t matter too much if they can’t do a lot of typical couple stuff.

[alexandriteobscuraarchive]

I think I might've missed the posts about the situation but why did you split your blog up and (most importantly) are you doing okay? I know that was something that was a big source of stress for you. Also can people follow your new blog?

((First and foremost: thank you for asking if I'm okay or not. I know that's a rather easy thing to just assume one way or another online and I appreciate the care and effort. Also I'm sorry if you missed anything important, I tried to reblog the related posts a handful of times but you can't always reach everyone, you know? It wasn't intentional I assure you. To answer if I'm okay or not I'm....getting there, is the best way to put it I suppose? I'll try to keep this brief.

I'm taking a slight break (not a hiatus and while I do occasionally slap a post on the dash I'm not really speaking or engaging ic) from this blog because; and I'm trying to keep this is a simple as I can, I'm dealing with a lot of feelings of anger and resentment towards this blog (which I know is unfair to the people--which is pretty much everyone here---who haven't done anything wrong but I'll spare detailing you the intricacies of my deeply rooted anxieties and etc) which is harder for me to reconcile/progress with in a positive way compared to feeling stressed and lonely over on the new blog at the moment and so I'm choosing to focus my efforts over there because I feel like I can progress in a positive/healthy way, enjoy what I'm doing in a safe space, and so on. I am incredibly stressed---what I did and am still working on diligently to the best of my ability every day---is stressful to the point of being overwhelming if I think about it too hard, look at everything on the whole, etc, but it's necessary. It's necessary to enforce boundaries and not neglect myself a space where I can write what I want and what I love so dearly and that makes it worth it.

I split my blog up due to a lot of unwarranted harassment (anonymous for the most part but some people weren't, all of them have been blocked) that has been going on for months a thing that only increased in severity in spite of my earnest attempts to understand or work through what was going on, reconcile any expressed 'issues', repeat and thorough attempts to explain my side of things including offering to help people around the content that they professed to hate so strongly (said hate which bled over to me as a person and writer/roleplayer in general) and so on. It became untenable incredibly quickly---and if you followed me to alexandrite (which had a different name/center muse originally but I digress) from my former rp blog you'd know how severe the harassment there was and how I promised myself I'd handle such things in the future--- and this is me doing that. This experience on the whole was incredibly similar to the one that happened on my og blog and I promised myself that I wouldn't go through that again if i could help it.

I deserve to be treated better; both by myself and by everyone else, and this is me doing that (meaning treating myself better at the very least rather than staying in a hateful/hurtful environment) even if most days it makes me want to scream. Did I want to split everything up? To be completely honest no I did not. But I think in the end this is the best solution for everyone involved---but most of all this is the best solution for me---and once the stress ebbs a bit (and by a bit I mean a lot, a fucking lot, because I'm kinda drowning rn lol) I'm hoping to feel more secure. I'm....getting there, like I said. One thing at a time, always one thing at a time. I'm already doing good things over there and soon I'll be doing good things over here again too. Both blogs can (and will) coexist and we can all have fun together no matter where you follow me or who you want to interact with....eventually. I wish that people would realize how they treat others---that driving someone out of their own space when they've done nothing wrong, when the only thing they've done (or tried to do) is share something that they love with their friends/writing partners---isn't okay. I wish people would realize that how I was treated was not fucking okay (and most won't unfortunately) but I realized it and that, at least, is important. I said 'this isn't okay' and did what I needed to do not only to better myself (which is something that is incredibly hard for me to do; honestly it would've been impossible for me to do even a year ago) but to keep doing what I love. I'm trying to focus on that. I'm trying to let that drive me forward over everything else.

And to end on a further positive note: Yes, you can follow my new blog if you want to, all that I ask is that you make sure that your interest in the blog and the muses featured there is genuine and that you actually want to interact with them before following. If you liked them (any of them) and wanted to interact but never had the chance for whatever reason, or if we started something but never finalized anything yet, so and so forth, you're welcome to come on over because I'd love to have you. And if you don't (because as I've said a hundred times to idk how many deaf/closed ears) have any interest that's okay too. They're not for everyone and it's a lot to learn/take in even with my offering to help people in a variety of ways (an offer that is always open!), I get that and hold no resentment in that regard whatsoever, all that I ask is that you understand that I'm taking care of myself by doing this...all of this...and that I appreciate you too. The people who remain here waiting for me to come back and post for the muses here are just as appreciated as the people who follow me on my new blog. I love all of you very much no matter what and I look forward to writing with you all again, it's just that some of you will see more of me than the others will, at least for a little while.

If you want to follow my tcol blog you can go here @constellationcrowned (you'll see my self promo for the blog over here periodically as well, it's obvious af lol) or if you have any questions please feel free to contact me privately either over there or on discord. And thank you again for your kind words anon, truly, I hope you have a nice day/night and I look forward to potentially writing with you soon no matter where that might be.))