#but i can fix that if it really bothers me that much
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luckykiwiii101 · 1 day ago
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ONE THING ABOUT BEING THE QUEEN OF DELUSIONS? IT GIVES YOU A LONG WAY TO FALL
p.s. this post isn’t pretty, it wasn’t worth my time, or effort.
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Hey Upper East Siders. Gossip girl here. Usually i’m here to help you fix your life, but @loaisacult, this one’s for you. And I can’t name any upper east siders more desperate than, well…you. It’s pitiful I know. But you can cry about it later, if you haven’t ran out of tears already, that is.
I don’t mean to start a fight, but there’s a weak link in every chain, and it just happens to be you.
I know you express your belief in the law of assumption being a cult. The funny thing is, when people don’t like something, they usually walk away, unless it bothers them that much. And the even funnier thing is, you complain about bloggers “preaching” the law of assumption, and getting others to follow. But what are you doing? Preaching your ideologies, in hopes that others will follow you too. Oh what’s that word again…hypocritical was it?
And oh sweetie, no one cares about your irrelevant opinions enough to affirm “@loaisacult doesn’t exist, @loaisacult doesn’t exist…” Talk about a weak argument. I hope law isn’t your major. But you know what is major? Your idiocy.
Calling people on this app suicidal? Pathetic. Although I can’t tell you that isn’t true. Because to some extent, it is. And i’d agree with you if you weren’t so ignorant. But I guess changing self in terms other than just loa isn’t your cup of tea. Bloggers are not meant to be personal therapists for people in the loacommunity. And yes there are and were previously some bloggers who would get suicidal asks from anons and just respond to them to persist. But why are you generalising EVERYONE in the community? Your point is immediately invalid. So because there were some immoral bloggers who would act that way automatically means that the whole entire practise of the law of assumption is a CULT? Hello? Do you hear yourself?
Let’s use your “logic” here. Say gossip girl makes a post telling her followers to worship satan. Therefore the whole entire loa community must ALL be satanists! Now how ridiculous is that…
Yes there are liars, everywhere. Oh i’m sorry, did that come as a surprise to you? You didn’t think the world was rainbows and sunshine did you? Well unless you assume it is. But at the same time, there are honest people too. Yet you like to pick and choose what to focus on. Look me in my virtual eyes and tell me that Lady gaga isn’t one of the most famous people on the planet. Oh wait..you can’t! News flash, she manifested that. And so did many of your other favourites. Yet you choose to focus on liars, because that’s what you want to believe. Of course a close minded, one sided argument is your way to go. Disregard everything else in the process why don’t you.
“It's ironic how some boast about manifesting luxury items like Lamborghinis, which could easily be rented, yet they fail to manifest meaningful change for their followers who are in abusive situations.” - l.o.s.e.r
“Want to prove to your followers who are spiraling about the American election rather than post persist hehehee how about you manifest for them….. change the election revise life’s an illusion while you’re crying about having your rights taken away lol but you can’t.” - l.o.s.e.r
Run upper east siders, we’ve got an idiot on our hands. Making a point on something completely false. If you really understood the law, you’d know that you can’t manipulate somebody else’s reality, unless they assume you can. But it’s not to my surprise that you didn’t know that, of all people. Last time I checked, it’s YOUR imagination, and nobody else’s. So WHY would YOUR 3D reflect THEIR imagination?
In short, you make points about “why don’t you manifest for your followers 🥺” Well, I don’t know if you knew this but…there’s this concept called free will. And just because someone chooses to not do something, doesn’t mean they can’t. Is common sense just not part of the package for you? It seems the point flies right over your head faster than you can catch it, and the only thing that doesn’t land, are your “points”.
But if you still don’t understand me, let’s use a little bit of your so -called logic here.
‘Loa is real manifesting is real shifting is real but most people in this community lie and are culty 99.999% of the stories here are lies the people doing that shit don’t even post abt it probably think they’re in some dream most of the success here are creative writing and living in the end.” - l.o.s.e.r
From YOUR logic, couldn’t I just ask you to manifest that the liars don’t exist and that you no longer view the law of assumption as a cult? So why haven’t you…? You’ll ask anyone questions but yourself. And if they think it was a dream…then how did they send their success stories to bloggers? Did I miss an update because last time I checked, you can’t do that in a dream.
And don’t get me started on how statistically IMPOSSIBLE that is. Do I even have to explain why? I promise you, thousands of people are NOT lying for the pure fun of it. Wouldn’t they rather shit on loa just like you rather than posting success stories hoping it’ll happen?I didn’t know talking out of the wrong hole was in fashion these days. But then again, not everyone has style. And if there’s one thing money can’t buy, it’s class. Was that a moth? Must’ve flewn right out of your wallet.
Now don’t get me wrong, i’m not bothered to read your whole blog and all the nonsense you cry about and debunk every little thing you say. Because trust me, common sense does the job for me.
Have fun continuing to “preach” your delusional idea of the law being a cult to yourself and your little followers. Like sheep. One after the other.
Don’t even think about trying to respond to me, as if anything you say makes sense.
P.S. I’ll delete this post later, I don’t like having drama on my blog. This is my first and last time addressing you. I just don’t want people in this community, including my followers to listen to idiots like you telling them that all the success stories they’ve read are fake, when that is so obviously not true. The fucking audacity. Disrespectfully, shut your mouth and don’t open it again.
- gossip girl
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look-at-the-soul · 3 days ago
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Every little thing you do- Part 12
Tommy Shelby x reader
Series Master list
Hello… it’s me 🫢 with another part of this series, please forgive me for taking so long, hoping the inspiration fairies will visit me soon ✨so… how will their relationship turn after this? 🥰 thank you so much for reading!
Word count: 3,514
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Tommy was losing his patience, there was a snitch ruining his plans and even though he was already taking care of that, he couldn’t let his guard down. He needed to convince the Russians to be on his side and keep Father Hughes close to find his weaknesses.
The more he thought about it, the more convinced he felt about it. After leaving the Petrovna gathering he was replaying in his mind Father Hughes’ reactions, he needed to take him down and he wanted to do it himself. That priest was everything but an example to people, arrogant, thought he knew all about everything and it irritated Tommy. But the key to him was through the Russian family.
Perhaps he could eventually make the Petrovna family betray themselves if he played his hand correctly, they were desperate for money and status. He just needed to be really careful and play his part.
With a groan he made his way upstairs, feeling his steps heavy. Ada would go to sleep whenever she wanted, he had asked Mary to have a room ready for her and Karl all the time because lately they’ve been staying over more frequently. His sister had been so helpful with the last touches to the foundation, she made sure the grand opening was successful and everything was running according to the original plans. He tried to push it as long as possible, but delaying the project to wait for Y/N to wake up would be unfair for the children and deep down he knew she wouldn’t want that.
Feeling tired he threw the jacket of his suit on the bed, followed by his tie. Taking the gun from its holster, he placed the weapon in the small of his back using the waistband of his pants as support. Discarding the rest of his clothes, his mind went to the following steps of his plans, he was so lost in his own thoughts that he didn’t hear the knock on his door.
“Mary?”
But he heard Ada’s voice clearly followed by a gasp and a Jesus.
Turning around he found the door slightly open and he heard voices in the hallway.
“What’s the matter?” He quickly went to see what was happening.
“I j-just knocked to see if you needed anything Mr. Shelby.” Mary stammered.
Ada stared at the maid and then looked at her brother, confusion evident in her eyes.
“No thank you Mary, you can have some rest.” He quickly replied.
Just as Ada was about to talk to him, Karl started crying in her bedroom so she excused herself and rushed to calm her son.
An overwhelming feeling washed over him and his eyes fixed in Y/N’s bedroom and he couldn’t help but walk in, everything was just like she left it. The bottle of perfume she refused to use in the beginning, her hairbrush and mirror, the jewelry box… as his eyes moved across the room, he found the trunk he bought for her just a few days before she got shot, his fingers trembled when he touched the perfect woodcraft at the top. Opening it and he felt his heartbreak in two as he realized Y/N had been filling it with blankets and clothes for her baby.
A sob escaped his lips. “I’m sorry.” He mumbled into the silence. And he was, he really felt sorry for what happened to Y/N.
That room shouldn’t be dark and lonely, she should be there.
Closing the trunk he felt his chest heavy, guilt was eating him alive. The feeling was more than he could handle and he rushed to leave. Once again inside his own bedroom, Tommy went straight for a glass of whiskey, downing in mere seconds.
He couldn’t do this, he couldn’t lay down on his bed and pretend to sleep peacefully while Y/N was battling for her life in the hospital. So he went downstairs, not bothering on putting his shirt on.
Pouring himself a drink, he sat in front of the fire, his eyes fixed on the flames flicking. The correspondence piled on his desk captured his attention, it had been accumulating since Y/N wasn’t reminding him to check it. Taking a sip of his drink, Tommy stood up to grab the envelopes, going one by one, he left a few letters directed towards the children’s Institute, he was saving those for Y/N. But suddenly his eyes stopped at one of the envelopes, in bold letters it said it was urgent and important.
Returning to his previous spot at the couch, he used his knife to open it and quickly ran his eyes through the words direct to any of Arthur Sr’s children.
It basically said that his father had passed away, he was shot.
Tommy stared at the letter for a while, his eyes fixed completely in the words. The news of his Father’s passing away took him by surprise and he couldn’t help it but think about how broken their relationship was. He couldn’t recall the last time he saw him, or a happy memory in his presence.
He was just a stranger, somebody who didn’t care about him or his siblings.
And for some reason, he didn’t feel pity for the old man. In the end the old man got what he deserved.
Battling with the internal turmoil, he decided to gather the following day his brothers and some peaky men to hunt, there wasn’t an ideal way to share the news and deep down he knew all his brothers had a difficult relationship with their father, but he hoped it was the right thing to do, to try to gain some closure.
That and sharing the plans for his next move, he needed to recruit the best men and also work on finding the Duchess’s weakness, she’d be fundamental to carry on his plans but she was smart and she’d want something in return.
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And soon he’d confirm it, because by the time he returned home the following day there was a Bentley parked outside his house.
For fucks sake, he thought. He wasn’t expecting Tatiana it was just a bold move from her, she was desperate and pathetic.
Her seduction tactics were literally a joke, se was just a spoiled little princess living of dreams and people bowing. When she placed her hand on his cheek, Tommy didn’t feel anything, she’d probably provide a good blowjob, a wild one night stand… but that was it.
“You seem a bit off.” She soon realized by his lack of enthusiasm.
“I’m tired.” He lied, it slipped off his lips so easily.
“Mary is quite a character.” Tatiana stated folding her arms. “She seems so loyal.”
Tommy took his cigarette case and raised his eyebrows nonchalantly. “Hmm.”
“I’ve a theory about maids, there’s always one in love with her master, fantasizing about you, she’d do anything you ask.” The Duchess chuckled about her own words.
Tommy stared at her with his head tilted to the side. She was using her free time to make fucking theories about the maids instead of doing something useful.
“And what’s the result for your theory?”
“I think for you, that maid it’s Mary.” Tatiana laughed. “Haven’t you notice something off?”
Tommy wanted to roll his eyes at her. Her level of boredom amused but didn’t surprise him.
“Do you’ve an employee after you?” He asked instead.
“Oh yes. Maybe I can confirm it tonight, see her reaction squirming and getting uncomfortable.”
Tommy thought how twisted and sick Tatiana was. He didn’t want to know if her stupid theory was right, he didn’t want to put on a show in front of his maid.
He was desperately looking for a way to escape her, to find a way out of that situation because Tatiana seemed determined to carry on her own plans, but rejecting her, would cause him a lot of trouble so he needed to play along…just as he was about to sit next to her when the phone started ringing.
His heart stopped beating for a moment, sudden phone calls this late only meant bad news.
“Arrow House.” He replied automatically, praying for the first time.
“Tom? Is that ye?” Johnny Dogs asked.
“What’s the matter?”
“It’s Y/N…. She’s awake.”
Tommy didn’t listen to the following, Johnny’s voice sounded so far away. He felt underwater, like he was dreaming, the shovels on the wall hammering his brain. Somehow he asked Mary to get someone to drive Tatiana back home and then he rushed towards the door grabbing his coat in the process, leaving the Duchess perplexed and fuming for not getting the attention she thought she deserved.
If someone asked him what happened in between that phone call and the drive towards the hospital he wouldn’t be able to explain it. He didn’t know how he was able to drive, his hands were shaking, his heart was pounding like thunder.
And right now he didn’t care if Y/N’s family kicked him out, he would step back from her life if they wanted to, but he had to see her.
But it was impossible and not because of her family, but because there were a dozen of people inside her bedroom, between doctors and nurses. They needed to take samples for exams, do endless examinations and run tests to be able to determine the damage and consequences.
He spent the entire night pacing the white hallway up and down. Trying to have a word with each hospital staff that left her room, they still didn’t have answers.
His neck protested when he looked up, finding Y/N’s grandma sitting on an uncomfortable chair, the sun was almost up.
“Did you see her?”
The woman gave him a nod. “She squeezed my hand.”
“Why don’t you go and have some rest, I’ll stay here.” Tommy offered.
But she was already shaking her head. “No until I know she’s fine.”
Aching for a smoke, Tommy had no choice but to lean forward. “Do you remember when she fell from the fence and hit her head?”
They both chuckled at the memory.
“Was that when you asked me for a needle and thread to sew something?”
A smile formed on his lips, he was so fucking scared when he saw the blood, that he went pale. And when her grandma squinted her eyes and asked what really happened he told her the truth. In the end the blood came from the scratch on her knee but she rubbed her temple, therefore why she had blood on her head.
“I knew she wouldn’t give up.” Her grandma added patting his arm. “And you shouldn’t either.”
Confused by her statement, Tommy looked at her, but the woman got up and walked towards the reception. Leaving him to deal with the internal turmoil that just started inside him.
All kinds of people walked past him, some visiting, some leaving, a few nuns with a Bible and a basket of sandwiches… he had already paid a nurse to keep him updated before anyone else, and unlike his usual reactions he kept away from making a scandal, decided to keep a low profile for Y/N’s sake.
“She didn’t want to, but had a few sips of soup.” The nurse informed him with a smile.
But when a doctor approached him in the waiting room, his face changed. Was something wrong?
“Her mother refused, but the patient has been asking to see you.”
“She said she wouldn’t let anyone run any other test or check on her, they’re actually arguing about it as we speak, she’s quite stubborn.”
Touching the match inside the pocket of his coat, Tommy rubbed the edge nervously.
Tommy left his comfortable position against the wall he had adopted for the last few minutes and grabbed the doctor’s shoulders.
“How’s she doing? How’s the baby?”
“Her physical exam is well, she recognized everyone and if she’s already arguing with her mother, it’d take it as a good sign.” The doctor explained. “But we still have to wait for the blood sample and other studies.”
Feeling some relief, Tommy sighed loudly, leaning his head against the wall. A few minutes passed before he could put a step inside her room.
Hesitating first, Tommy took his time before opening the door. He wasn’t ready for the way her sight hit him.
The moment he had been waiting patiently finally was happening; Y/N was sitting on her hospital bed, a bandage crossing her from shoulder to shoulder, she looked pale and fragile and the attempt of smile seemed to demand a lot of effort from her, but she was alive… and she was awake.
“Thought you’d show up with quite a gang and start blinding everybody.”
She managed to say, it was a bit strange to speak for now, her throat felt dry.
Her statement made him swallow the lump in his throat to laugh, but he also felt like crying so everything got stuck and he couldn’t answer right away.
“I was about to if you didn’t wake up.” He cleared his throat. “I’m sorry, I’m so fucking sorry.”
He took a step closer, his fingers touched the feet of her bed, she had a sheet on top to cover for modesty.
“Can I give you a hug?” He asked out of the blue.
It was so unlike him, but he felt if he didn’t touch her, he wouldn’t believe this was really happening. Before she could even nod, he welcomed her into his embrace. Carefully to not hurt her.
“I’m so fucking happy to see you.” He whispered, not fully believing it was happening.
“Hey, did you really think I’d give up so easily?” Y/N ran her hands all over his back. “I learned from the best.”
“Fucking finally.” Tommy couldn’t suppress the chuckle she provoked. “I’m so sorry.” Tommy cracked but Y/N shook her head.
“It wasn’t your fault, stop it.”
In response, Tommy could only hold her hand gently and kiss her knuckles.
“Tommy please, stop.” She pleaded nervously, breaking away the contact between them.
Now that she was awake how could he carry on hiding his feelings for her?
“I hope we’re able to continue the pending examinations and tests?” The doctor stood by the door, holding her record, but before they could tell him to walk in, Y/N let out a pained sigh, bending over her bump.
Tommy reacted immediately passing one of his arms over her shoulders, but feeling useless not knowing what to do.
“Take it easy Miss, deep breaths.”
Tommy gave him a shocked and offended look. “What do you mean deep breaths? Give her something!”
“Unfortunately due to her pregnancy she can’t take most of the medication, since we can’t take the bullet out yet…”
Tommy was fuming, how come they couldn’t do anything? Something?
“When will I be able to be discharged?” Y/N asked tentatively, leaning to her right felt much better.
“If your tests come out clean, you can go.”
That was a relief, partly because to Tommy it was another thing to worry about, Y/N needed protection and someone to be with her 24/7.
“That’s wonderful news.” Y/N’s mother stated from the door, ignoring Tommy she walked to be by her daughter side.
Things between them were still like a bumpy road, her parents basically ignored him and he decided to do the same for Y/N’s sake.
“I don’t want you to feel overwhelmed, there’s a lot of things to catch up on, but the most important thing right now is yours and the baby well-being.” He explained to Y/N.
“I can’t wait to have you back at home an-“ Y/N’s mother started to say, but her daughter’s look was charged with concern and confusion.
“Mother I’m not going back to the house…” She stated through gritted teeth.
“Don’t be ridiculous, where else could you possibly go?”
“My house.” Tommy answered bluntly, not giving it a second thought.
The doctor confirmed right there it was a tricky situation but his job was to cure people, not being in the middle of a family drama.
“I’d highly suggest for now to focus on the patient, you can figure out whatever you need to later on. She’ll need space because the following months will be hard until the birth, then we can take the bullet out.”
His firm statement laid above Tommy, Y/N and her mother like they were holding a fragile veil. Everyone trying to keep their side up while checking the others to prevent it from touching the floor.
“Now if you excuse me, I’ve to run some tests.”
Tommy caught the cue immediately, but Y/N’s mother didn’t move. “If you excuse me Mrs?”
She scoffed and gave the doctor an offended look before leaving the room.
“Sorry about that.”
“For what? I didn’t see anything.” He gave her a reassuring smile, helping Y/N relax for a moment at least.
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Y/N heard a voice in the distance, but her eyes felt heavy. The pain expanded through her body like a wave back and forth. It was hard to find a comfortable position to sleep in but she didn’t want to complain, she was alive because of some miracle.
She just wanted to be alright for her baby, she couldn’t wait to hold the little bundle in her arms.
Slowly she opened her eyes and waited until they adjusted to the light of the room.
“Where you dreaming?” Her sister Lee Anne asked, her eyes full of curiosity.
“Yeah, I was rocking the baby to sleep.” Y/N replied, the image was so vivid. “Where’s everyone?”
“Grandma went to the house to have some rest, Mum is running some errands…” Lee Anne then looked to the door.
“What is it?”
Y/N knew her sister so well, there was something she wasn’t telling her.
“Mum had a disagreement with Tommy and asked him to stay away from you, then you woke up and I heard Mom and Dad arguing again about what will happen when you get discharged.”
Y/N tilted her head up, to the ceiling not wanting to get into that just yet. She could tell her Mum wanted her home again by the comments she had been making all day. Small hints here and there, making decisions about her life, about her child.
“But I don’t want you to worry.” Lee Anne quickly tried to explain.
“Let me guess, Dad is still against it.”
Her sister felt a rush of guilt take over, but she wanted Y/N to know what was happening.
“I’m just done, you know?” Y/N expressed tiredly.
And suddenly Y/N broke into tears, she was a crying mess. Feeling all over the place she couldn’t even name her feelings. The sudden memory of getting shot assaulted her, blood and shouting surrounded her, and when she saw Tommy’s face full of panic, the fear in his eyes was all she could see every time she closed her eyes.
The realization of what might have happened, if the bullet had hit her stomach or her heart…
“It’s alright.” Her sister tried to comfort her, but it wasn’t working.
She had been trying to be strong. But she was scared.
“What if they try to come again and finish what they started?” Y/N asked, her voice full of worry.
“I won’t let that happen.” Tommy’s voice filled the room, neither of them noticed he was standing close enough to hear Y/N’s words, so he took them by surprise.
“Tommy…” Y/N said his breathlessly, knowing him the way she did, she knew he felt guilty, she could see it in his eyes.
“Even if I’ve to stand outside your door all day and night, I promise you nothing bad will ever reach you again.”
Y/N nodded, trying to not break in front of him, her sister sneaked out quietly choosing to wait for her Mother in the waiting room.
“I’ve taken care of that already, they better no try to hurt y-”
Y/N froze as she processed his word. “Wait, what do you mean? What happened ?”
Tommy looked away, he desperately wanted to change the subject. “Nothing.”
Placing her hand on his arm, she made him look down at her. “Tommy, tell me what did you do.”
Suddenly his tie felt so tight.
How could he tell her he killed someone? He was trying to make his businesses legal, he wanted to make her feel proud of him.
Towering over her, Tommy cupped her cheek gently, giving her a look of adoration. “You’ve nothing to worry about, hmm?”
Staring into his eyes, she realized he wasn’t telling her something, but at the same time she could see the worry in his eyes… and something else she couldn’t name, but yet she felt familiar with.
“Listen, Y/N there’s something I need to tell you.”
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@wannabeperfectionists-blog (can’t tag) @yeppaweshallsee (can’t tag) @skydisneylover (can’t tag) @holacia3 @galactict3a @mysticalbouquetwolf-posts @ietss @abaker74
@natalie--rushman @elliaze @justrainandcoffee @teawonderfultea-blog1
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niteskysx · 1 day ago
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Stepbro! Nicholas Chavez x reader (one shot fic kinda?, established relationship)
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As per your usual evening routine, you’re sitting on the couch with a textbook open on your lap, trying to lose yourself in your studies. Eventually, you hear footsteps—heavy, purposeful—and before you even look up, you know it’s Nick.
He stands in front of you, arms crossed, his jaw set in a tense line. There’s a hardness in his eyes, something you haven’t seen before. You hesitate to ask, but you do it anyway. Can’t hurt, can it?
“Rough day?” you ask softly, trying to ease the tension with a small, nervous smile.
Nick doesn’t answer right away. Instead, he drops down beside you on the couch, much closer than he usually does. “You could say that,” he mutters, his tone sharper than usual. He runs a hand through his hair and leans back, his gaze drifting over you slowly, intently. “Think you could help make it better?”
And there it was.
Your throat tightens, but you manage a small nod. “How… how can I help?”
He raises an eyebrow, almost amused by your innocence. “Just… be here with me.”
His hand moves to rest on your knee, his thumb slowly tracing circles against the fabric of your jeans, sending a shivers down your back.
You feel that familiar touch on you, whenever he “needs” you. “I-I’m here,” you whisper, glancing down, unable to meet his eyes.
“Good,” Nick murmurs, his hand moving up just a bit, his fingers grazing your thigh. “Because I need a distraction. He leans in, his voice softening as he leans in closer to you. “Think you can keep me company tonight?”
You take a shaky breath, mustering up the courage to speak. “Nick�� maybe tonight isn’t the best time. I really need to focus on my studies,” you say, forcing a gentle smile, hoping he’ll take the hint and let you go.
Nick leans closer, his voice soft but insistent. “C’mon. Just a few minutes. You don’t have to study all night, do you?” He slides his hand just a little higher as he gives you a faint, almost pleading smile.
You swallow, feeling trapped under his stare. “I… I really can’t, Nick.” you stammer, trying to pull your thoughts together, to say something that might sway him.
Nick’s narrow at your hesitation, and his expression shifts into one of frustration. He lets out a sharp breath, his hand leaving your thigh abruptly. “Fine. Whatever,” he mutters, his voice edged with annoyance. He pushes himself up from the couch, giving you one last hard look before turning on his heel.
Ten minutes flew by.
You had been sitting there in silence for ten whole minutes and you know you should be getting back to your studying but you couldn’t…. He just seemed so mad and you didn’t want him to mad at you. Why did it bother you so much?
You couldn’t figure out why you felt this way, especially considering the amount of stress this man gives you— Sneaking around the house, him finding new ways to “torture” you or pleasure you— depending on what his mood is, making sure no one sees you two together, especially your mom and stepdad.
Before you know it, you found yourself standing outside his door, hesitant. Part of you wants to turn back, but another part of you is telling you to knock on that door.
God, has he completely corrupted you?
Your trembling hands manage to knock lightly on the door, and after a moment, you hear his voice from the other side. “Yeah?”
Slowly, you push the door open, peeking in to see him lying on his bed, playing with a baseball ball by himself, with his gaze fixed on the ceiling. He doesn’t look at you, but you can tell by the way his jaw tightens that he knows it’s you.
“Hey… I just wanted to check on you,” you say softly, stepping inside and closing the door behind you.
He finally turns his head to look at you, his expression unreadable. “Why? Thought you were too busy,” he says, his tone a mix of bitterness and something else—something that makes your heart race.
You take a hesitant step forward. “I… I’m sorry if I upset you. I just really needed to study, that’s all.”
Nick sits up slowly, his gaze locking onto yours. “Yeah? And what about now? Suddenly have time for me?”
He sounds mad, but still manages a slight smirk on his face.
You take a seat next to him on the bed.
“I just… didn’t want you to be upset,” you mumble, looking down at your hands.
He scoots in closer to you, closing the space between you and him. “So, you’re here to make it up to me, then?” he asks, his voice dropping to a low murmur.
You swallow hard, trying to steady yourself. “What? I-I didn’t mean—”
But he doesn’t let you finish. He leans in even closer than before, with his hand resting on your knee and his face mere inches from yours. You can feel the warmth of his breath hitting your face. “I think you did,” he murmurs, his hand moving to rest on your hips, pulling you just a little closer. “So… make it up to me, then.”
(I WANNA CONTINUE THIS BUT I HAVE NO IDEAS!! 😭 SO IF YOU LIKE THIS SHITTY PIECE AND HAVE IDEAS FOR TO CONTINUE IT LOL PLS LMK OKAYY ILYY 🤍)
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discordiansamba · 3 days ago
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"what do you want?"
azula refuses to look at zuko as he sits down in front of her cell. it's the first time she's ever seen her too young uncle dressed like the fire nation royalty he's always been, and she thinks she's already sick of it. he's even managed to scrape his short peasant hair into a somewhat proper topknot, fixed into place by a flame hairpiece that reminds her of the ones she's seen in depictions of avatar roku.
"i thought i would visit my great-niece," zuko says simply, "-is that a problem?"
azula scoffs. you've never had any interest in me before, uncle. why start now, after a lifetime of ignoring my half of the family?
at least he has the decency to look properly guilty, she thinks. he even apologizes, which she just rolls her eyes at. what? getting sentimental in your old age? or is it your newly returned mortality making you regret your past choices? whatever it is, she wants no part of it.
zuko just sighs.
i know it's hard to understand, niece, he says, but the way you were raised and the things you were taught were wrong. you are just a child. there is still time for you to unlearn them.
"don't call me a child," azula hisses, "-not with that face."
her great-uncle just heaves another sigh. fair enough, he says. your uncle never liked it when i lectured him at your age either. i guess it's hard to take me seriously when i don't look my age. but i've seen much more than you have, azula. i laid the air nomads to rest. do you know how many of them were children?
"they were weak," azula replies, "-it's what they deserved."
the weak deserve the right to live too, zuko tells her. and clearly, some of his father's soldiers must have agreed with him, because he found plenty of fire nation remains with evidence of scorch marks on them too. they saw an injustice happening with their own eyes that they realized they were a part of, and died trying to protect the air nomads.
"then they were weak too," azula waves a hand, "-besides, everyone knows the air nomads were plotting to invade the rest of the world."
her great-uncle just laughs.
(it's not a kind sound.)
"invade the rest of the world?" zuko asks. "sounds terrible. good thing the fire nation got rid of them and then spent another hundred years at war with the rest of the world."
azula frowns. that's different. the air nomads wanted to force their lifestyle on the other nations. the fire nation isn't doing that. we're just-
"-spreading our greatness to the rest of the world?" zuko asked. "i thought you were smart, niece."
azula bristles. smarter than you, uncle, she hisses.
zuko pinches the bridge of his nose, and sighs. he spits flame as he does, as if he is just barely holding in his temper. fine, he says. i can see we're not getting anywhere today. i'll visit again.
"don't bother," azula says, "-i'm no traitor."
(zuko exhales as he leaves. he has no idea how iroh manages to do the 'wise old man' thing. he'd ask him for advice, if it weren't for the fact that he was so much younger than him. he was over a century old. he should know how to talk to a teenager without losing his temper.
ugh. maybe bumi had a point about him being a fake old man.
he wants to help his niece. he does. he wants to believe that she can change, like iroh changed. she's still so young.
he just has no idea how to get her there. he knows almost nothing about her. he's fought against her, but he doesn't know azula. she's right- he really did ignore her side of the family. he had his reasons, but...
...he sighs. maybe he should do the one thing he's been avoiding all this time, and talk to the man who'd made his niece like this in the first place. it would shed some light on her upbringing, if nothing else. there was no point in avoiding ozai- not now that he was mortal again.
...he still didn't relish the idea.)
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dykedvonte · 1 day ago
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I saw your earlier post and you mentioned how people say things like "Curly is a grown ass man", "Curly is bigger than Jimmy", "Curly is Jimmy's boss", "He just needed a backbone" and you're so right cuz it drives me insane the way people want to hate Curly as much as Jimmy so they start saying really concerning stuff. Like is that not just victim blaming? Is saying "Curly is a grown ass man" not just rephrasing "why didn't she fight back?" It feels like the fandom think they can just say vile shit because his abuse wasn't physical (at first, and don't even get me started on anyone saying he deserved to be abused as if any kind of abuse can be justified) and he's a guy. Makes me wonder if people would bother seeing Curly as another victim if he was a woman or if discussion would be equally as insufferable because he's still not the "perfect victim" compared to Anya
It's crazy the way people say "I would've fixed everything unlike Curly" and then continue brushing off a victim and saying they deserved it. Even Curly acknowledged Anya's suffering even if he failed to help her in the end, and yet the fandom acts like this without any self-awareness (sorry for ranting like this but I'm just very tired of the fandom recently)
What worse about those comments and the sentiments is it’s often used when people are discussing him as a victim. Like acknowledging the abuse he also faced with Jimmy and that it shouldn’t matter or have an effect because he needed to “man up” and deal with it due to his position.
He needed to deal with it more effectively yes, but it is really victim blamey in the sense he should’ve just been able to. I talked about if Curly was a girl people would probably still judge her on the basis of being more experienced and accomplished and also needing to know better. The problem is that every is trying to treat what Anya and Curly went through on a comparative level. The game does not try to do that but instead tries to have their abuse parallel each other and be metaphorical, along with show the subtle and explicit ways abusers treat their victims.
People see how Jimmy and Curly parallel each other and create the idea “they deserved each other” in some weird ironic penance stance on both their parts. It’s just so odd because the game clearly shows that not a single person was deserving of their situation and especially the treatment under Jimmy at any point for any reason. The game centers around everyone paying for callous actions he commits and refuses to take responsibility for and yet the conversation center around one of his most tormented victims being questioned on how deserving he was of it/how it shouldn’t have effected him that badly.
I know you can be mad at Curly but making it out that if he was a real good man than he just would’ve had the balls to stand up to what was likely years of emotional and mental degradation still perpetuates the idea if a victim really didn’t like the treatment they would’ve just fought back harder or not put themselves into that position in the first place.
It goes back to the idea that there’s always a way to stop it and it’s on you if it happens. It’s again taking focus off the perpetrator and putting it on other aspects than the ever present source. Idk man but it’s like people are trying to make so many slightly different think pieces on MW that some just loop back to harmful rhetoric we were just moving away from.
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misspelledwordswizard · 2 days ago
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You know that meme of a taller woman holding a short woman up against a wall? If you don't know which one, it's this one:
https://pin.it/6RPdjPu2A
If you managed to see the image, I was wondering if you could write something about Reader holding Four like that to kiss him
Yes, I love this dynamic! Any opportunity I have to highlight Four's height I will use it, he is the Short King we love! Thank you for sending this request <3
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— Is that really necessary? 
The short man asked, his cheeks flushed due to the position he was in. He was positioned against the wall, raised up so that he was at eye level with me. I had to hold back a laugh, even though my main purpose was something romantic, I couldn't help but find my boyfriend's situation comically adorable. 
— Of course! How else could I do it? – I replied laughing, I'm loving it. 
It was surprisingly easy to do it, Four is small and light, which helped a lot, but I wasn't weak either, and being taller than him, it was like lifting a child. 
— You could just bend down. 
— Nah, that wouldn't be funny!  
— Okay, just get on with it, this isn't exactly the most pleasant position to be in.  
I smiled, giving in to his charms and complaints. I brought my face close to his, lovingly, my eyes fixed on his, our bodies glued together allowing me to feel his accelerated heartbeat. Even though we had been together for some time now, this occasional shyness always caught me out. He looks so handsome when he's embarrassed. 
 Finally, I closed the distance between us, sealing our lips in a soft, affectionate kiss. As much as I loved to tease him, moments like this made me melt completely, becoming as soft as possible. Four's hands rested on my shoulders, one of them gently went up to my neck, keeping it firm and deepening the kiss.  
I slowly pulled away from him, smiling happily like a fool in love. His blue eyes looked at me in a way that made all his love and affection visible. He didn't even seem bothered anymore.  
— Okay, now I can put you down. 
— Oh, wait, I want one more! 
That made me laugh again, but I didn't argue, I went back to kissing him without complaining. 
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chiritori · 11 days ago
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basically done setting up my new room YEAAAAA
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atanx · 7 months ago
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Forever thinking of that one post or sth where someone went like "Sasuke is such a bad character he wanted to destroy Konoha even tho that's the opposite of what Itachi wanted" like??? Whyyyy would Sasuke do what Itachi wants?
Like yeah Sasuke loves him, but you can love someone and utterly disagree with their motives. You can love and hate someone at the same time. You can love someone and still want to destroy everything they fought for.
Sasuke might love Itachi, and Itachi might have loved him in his own twisted way, but in the end Itachi still killed hundreds of people. He still took away Sasuke's entire world. He massacred his family for wanting something more out of life other than being constantly discriminated against. Itachi still chose to psychologically torture Sasuke, forcing him to watch Itachi slaughter the Uchiha for three days straight. Itachi still manipulated Sasuke into killing him.
And Itachi did it all in the name of a village. He was a thirteen year old boy. Think about it. Itachi was a seventh or eighth grader. He was indoctrinated, made into nothing but a tool by the village. And the village took his sacrifice and gave him nothing in return. The village moved on from the Uchiha massacre like nothing ever happened.
None of the hidden villages are good. They're literally all mercenaries, killers for hire who don't care who they kill. But Konoha is extra disgusting in how duplicitous it is. How it pretends that it's the nice village. How it pretends to be good, with all that 'Will of Fire' bullshit.
The scene where the Sandaime propaganda'd to a bunch of academy students before the third round of the chunin exams comes to mind. He claimed that every single person in the village was his precious person.
I couldn't help but feel outraged at that, disbelieving that he would actually say such an obvious lie. I guess the entirety of the Uchiha were just an exception! I guess the people he lets Danzo kidnap and indoctrinate, the shinobi he sends on suicide missions, the shinobi that are traumatised by their service, the entirety of thr Hyuuga side branch, they're all just exceptions! Those don't count!
If I can feel that much disdain and disgust, I can't imagine how much Sasuke feels.
Like, I want to destroy Konoha and I'm just reading a fictional work.
Konoha is the village that twisted Sasuke's brother. That took his childhood, his innocence and his happiness. That made him kill Sasuke's entire clan. That still kept its claws in him even years after the fact. Why wouldn't Sasuke want to destroy it?
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spitinsideme · 7 months ago
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i jyst realided somethinf is demon pomni based off of fizz?
absolutely not !!! i get people soemtimes calling her fizz or like helluva boss inspired design or sowmthing, one time i even had soemtone think it was a helluva boss au but its not ! in my head there is no connection between fizz and demon pomni ! she has two different coloured horns because thats literally pomnis whole thing and she has yellow eyes becaud like .. yellow eyes are fucking cool .. and they mske her look more like a creature whoch is very nice !!! there is z3ro connection between the two 👍
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gunstellations · 2 years ago
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to love and be loved
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willowser · 1 year ago
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honestly if i had a bigger brain, i would write an entire android shouto fic
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anjumstar · 5 months ago
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I have this thing on the internet where I don't like having a pseudonym. I don't like having multiple accounts. I like being me, just me, under the narrowest umbrella possible. It's funny, because I went to school for acting, but I don't like maintaining personas. In light of that, I've been trying to delete accounts that I made in an effort of fracturing my online identity. That's why I've changed my name here to anjumstar, the email account I made in 2006 in order to play neopets. That's why I removed my pseud on ao3. It's why I'm trying to pick away all the gems from my old tumblr account, reblog them or save them otherwise, and I'm gonna nuke it. I can't wait to nuke it.
To that end, I've just nuked my extra ao3 account, and I switched all the fics from it to my anjumstar account but put them in an anonymous collection. That means my stats are officially all combined and up-to-date, anddddd 🥁🥁🥁
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One million words have come and gone on ao3! Maybe five chapters ago in the old fic I'm working on finishing uploading please don't read it.
Since I try not to upload fics until I finish them behind the scenes, odds are I actually hit this goal last year, haha, but this was the first opportunity to see the figure on ao3, and it's a goal I always wanted to hit. It feels very legitimizing.
I wish more of that figure went towards bkdk, and I'm working on it. I hope to have an amazing bnha fic coming down the pike. If it does work out, it'll not be fore months and months and months, I am both over my head and out of my depths.
Here's to another million! 🥂
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lucyvaleheart · 11 months ago
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#sigh. another vent post....#almost getting tired of making these but. I'm just.... I just don't really have much else I can do without botherin people#uh pretty big trigger warning for this one BTW#don't read on if you're low on spoons and whatnot. genuinely it's fine and I will be fine I always am#but like. yknow. when shit sucks it fucking sucks#anyway. uh. I just can't stand the idea that I might be bothering someone#so at least this way my stupid cries for help have a possibility of getting me some without making any specific#person feel obligated. yknow? maybe you see the post maybe you don't#Maybe you don't read all the way maybe you do. either way you can choose if you have the spoons to reach out#without feeling guilty either way. I hope.#.......i kind of want to fucking kill myself again#.....it used to be a much rarer thought. and I used to be much less struck by intense loneliness and longing like this#but I just feel so fucking needy. so desperate for attention and love and it hurts so much if I don't get it#and like. it's realistically nobody's fault but my own yknow... i need to ask for it more. i know that. i just suck at it#and then I can't ask. so I don't get attention. and in turn I feel neglected. secondary. like I'm not anyone's primary focus#and it just fucking hurts so much and it's just my own damn fault and I don't know how to fix it.#......i do. I need therapy I need meds or something. that's the answer here really#picked out a psychiatrist. need to call and make an appointment. but adhd and executive function and anxiety (that last one I need meds for)#mean it's very hard to both remember and then actually perform the task of calling the fucjing Dr#......believe me I'm trying.....like fuck I'm trying so hard.... and I started bawling having seen sparkles and ms robot girl reblog that#post from me about letting prev know you're proud of them. bawled when quinn called me cutie last night. bawled when#ginny said they wished they were here.... fuck me I do too I want to be the focus of someone's attention so so so so badly#fuck#...............it's redundant to say at this point a second time but. goddess above its a little scary how much I wanna kill myself#........sigh#....anyway. please do not feel obligated to respond to this in any way. do what you got the spoons for.#thank you for even reading all of this shit if you've gotten this far. i love you deeply and with all my heart. I'll be fine I promise#won't act on it no matter how strong the feeling is. just.....hurts in the meantime. but I'll be ok. I promise#................fuck. im going back to bed
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triglycercule · 3 months ago
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brooo these fucking TIME DIFFERENCES are PISSING ME OFF 😭😭😭 i took a nap here and checked the clock app to see what time it was in America and i saw 12 and i was like oh alright sure i can post because im past my usual time anyways. and then i wake up from anothe nap and check the time in america and it turns it was actually 12 AM when i checked. AM. not PM. because im not there and my usual schedule is messed up!!!!!! i hate leaving the country it ruins me. and also i dont have universal service so everywhere sucks just keep me in my state ill be satisified
#whoops i say as i desperately scramble to find a way to unpost a post#ugh...... whats done js done. im not goig through all that effort to repost a post#the killer art is gonna get like no attention but its ok its ok i dont do it for the attention (for the most part)#anyways it looks good anyways and i completed 2/3 of the jk trio so mentally im satisfied#satisfied enough not to chase that high of attention ‼️‼️ me when i have basic restraint#yeah i'll admit i like seeing the attention. im not prideful enough to LIE about that#but im also not prideful enough to go after it too much. only post at specific time because then itll get likely to be seen#and then thats IT!!!! no mlre...#i may be a person who's never experienced any sort of internet attention before tumblr#but im also a lazy uncreative fuck who cannot be bothered to do anything until its really late#it'll get my minimum proudness of a post note count of 20 in like a month anyways so its ok#god i cant believe im actually posting my srt. i would NEVER last year at all#i do not have a lot of pride in my art i should probably fix that. im trying. boom there fixed!#im simply not good enough i MUST improve more ‼️‼️ i MUST be better i MUST be more flexible i must be A BETTER ARTIST!!!!!!!!#im a not good enough artist in my eye until i can draw a good everything in every style. i must be a jack of all trades#an admirable goal i know i know im very focuses on that. i say as i make no effort to improve aside from baby steps#i think this is more real tricule than tricule rant. this has naught to do with mtt#real tricule
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halfelven · 1 year ago
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love random not even logged in readers just dropping their 'constructive criticism' on your 100k+ story that you're putting online entirely for free. this is just a rant btw
"You obviously have a great talent and I think you should work on honing it some. As much as I’ve enjoyed the story, there are a few things that stand out that you might consider looking at. I feel like the story isn’t sure what it wants to be at times; is it character driven or plot driven? It doesn’t flow smoothly because sometimes we have these wonderful character vignettes, like Illumi and Kalluto on a road trip or Kite/Leorio/Gon/Killua in an apartment where plot doesn’t really feel important, followed by what feels like heavily plot driven beats, like Kalluto and the spiders. In addition, it contributes to confusion because sometimes we see established characterization turned on its head. Especially the weird way everyone all of a sudden just sort of was OK with Kalluto being a spider and then working with Illumi when they just went to all that trouble to escape him? It all kind of feels forced and not natural. You know?
Anyway, I’ll definitely keep reading and look forward to seeing what happens."
first: love you trying to sound legitimate with your "in addition" like this is some kind of writer's workshop. second: in what way would I, the writer, think that an incomplete part of my story in which the reader does not yet know most of the main motivations (they are only hinted at so far) feels forced and not natural when I know what's happening, where it is going (and where I haven't had other readers comment with confusion about that part)
and moving on. don't do this. also like i said this is a wip in and no, no one is cool with Kalluto being a spider and no they're not cool working with Illumi, really. it was already established that some of them /have/ been working with Illumi before this~ he's someone that they know. like have you never been in a seriously dangerous situation that you just have to get through before you get back to what you want?*** also at this point Chrollo's real motive hasn't been entirely revealed.
Killua keeps changing his mind about what he's doing because he's a scared kid whose self-hatred is destroying him from the inside out. the POV is so tight that I have to keep dropping reminders that what is stated in the narrative is often not true! Illumi's POV, for example, keeps showing Killua as really loving him and being happy he's around but struggling with a desire for freedom, while with Killua's POV he's terrified of Illumi most of the time. like how is that not obviously a distorted POV where you can't trust the narrator?
"where plot doesn’t really feel important, followed by what feels like heavily plot driven beats"
this part is especially irritating because it's like yeah that's how I want to write it? this isn't a published novel. I don't have to commit to making sure every scene is important to the plot. I can spend time writing a full scene about someone drinking a glass of water and then 13 chapters in a row that are for moving the plot forward. I didn't even tag it as a novel... I did tag it for unreliable narration and I keep getting annoyed that people keep ignoring that.
"I feel like the story isn’t sure what it wants to be at times; is it character driven or plot driven?"
it's both??? it's neither??? it's a fanfic??? why do I keep getting comments lately where people are expecting me to adhere to like fucking publishing standards. this keeps up and I will write a chapter which is entirely about a minor character drinking a glass of water. watch me. I'll write one about phinks drinking a glass of water and you'll like it*
"Overall, the story is good and presented a compelling alternative to CA. Look, each fan has their own opinion on CA and I know I didn’t like it. I think it was a product of what Togashi was going through as he began to experience health issues and then finding himself right back where he said he wasn’t going to be mentally after he ended his earlier manga. We can never know for sure, but it certainly had a “watch it all burn vibe” to it near the end. I honestly believe he wanted it to end with the finality of Gon’s suicide as a capstone statement, but was probably convinced to go a different route, which kinda of left a jarring feel in the narrative and culminated in a rather unsatisfying end to Gon and Killua’s journey. Despite that, I am very reluctant to read fics where the events of CA are erased or grossly modified and honestly yours is really the first long AU/alternate timeline I’ve enjoyed"
okay first of all, I love the CA arc. but I had to split a point off where Kite was going to survive. why do you have to leave this whole paragraph about how you think Togashi was or wasn't going to go with the CA on my fanfic? I didn't even write this as 'oh look at my alternative to CA bc I hated CA' I don't really look forward to hearing comments about how random people didn't like so and so aspect of the story that I'm basing my story off of. I've never written fanfic for a story that I didn't like (except for some things that I don't have published I wrote at a request for friends for a fandom they were into that I wasn't really) and yeah I've wanted to 'fix' aspects (like tolkien's treatment of women for example) but I am not looking for your 'this is what I hated about the source material' comments on my stories
tired of getting comments with little 'oh I didn't like your style at first but now I do' or 'here's how to fix your story!' unsolicited advice from people who aren't better writers than me (I don't even want it from people who would be better writers than me on stuff I'm just doing for fun and for free)
when did stuff like this become normal? at least don't be a coward and be not logged in so you can't even get a response notification. like girl they aren't cool with it! why do you think everyone is on guard standing around like they're in a fucking hostage situation? how do you see such wildly different interpretations from different character's POVs and think it's not intentional? what part about Kite watching Killua like a fucking hawk makes you think he's going to let Illumi take him after this?
like if you've never had to smile and pretend to be cool with your abuser (pretend to love them) or someone who was threatening you to keep someone else safe then good for you! it fucking sucks! also don't know how to explain to you what a child who is growing up in an extremely isolated abusive situation goes through (though I keep writing about it in this story you should catch on...) but it's a million back and forths with emotion and feelings--especially if their abuser does (to in some way or to some degree) love them. and it is often blaming themselves. I'm not letting my years of studying human psychology and child development go to waste here**
is this story perfect? no but I'm not gonna hire an editor for a fanfic. and everyone's interpretations of characters will be different. especially with child characters who are going through huge changes in the world around them and their personal lives. part of the appeal of fanfiction is 'who would they become if this happened instead?' *sorry I keep writing about starving and not having clean drinking water but I will never stop because that's what I grew up with and it's hell. also phinks drinking water would be compelling since I assume he'd have harder access to clean drinking water
**hunter x hunter is also one of the only stories I have encountered with characters who have backgrounds as fucked up as mine and Togashi's interest in human psychology really stands out.
***like good for you but that was most of my life and you sometimes just have to shut up and get through it. and no I will not put my notes in the right order bc I'm not being paid enough****
****I'm being paid nothing
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ghostcrows · 6 months ago
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I got so excited by webcomic updates that my heart rate went up like 20 beats. At a beautiful 3 am no less
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