#but hes NUANCED
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Thrawn girlies out here being ELATED and TERRIFIED
#thrawn#ahsoka#i know he's the villain and i know he spoiler dies#but hes NUANCED#I'm still bitter that the sequel trilogy wasn't just a straight up adaptation of heir to the empire#IT WAS RIGHT THERE
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the thing is that they're so fascinated by sex, they love sex, they can't imagine a world without sex - they need sex to sell things, they need sex to be part of their personality, they need sex to prove their power - but they hate sex. they are disgusted by it.
sex is the only thing that holds their attention, and it is also the thing that can never be discussed directly.
you can't tell a child the normal names for parts of their body, that's sexual in nature, because the body isn't a body, it's a vessel of sex. it doesn't matter that it's been proven in studies (over and over) that kids need to know the names of their genitals; that they internalize sexual shame at a very young age and know it's 'dirty' to have a body; that it overwhelmingly protects children for them to have the correct words to communicate with. what matters is that they're sexual organs. what matters is that it freaks them out to think about kids having body parts - which only exist in the context of sex.
it's gross to talk about a period or how to check for cancer in a testicle or breast. that is nasty, illicit. there will be no pain meds for harsh medical procedures, just because they feature a cervix.
but they will put out an ad of you scantily-clad. you will sell their cars for them, because you have abs, a body. you will drip sex. you will ooze it, like a goo. like you were put on this planet to secrete wealth into their open palms.
they will hit you with that same palm. it will be disgusting that you like leather or leashes, but they will put their movie characters in leather and latex. it will be wrong of you to want sexual freedom, but they will mark their success in the number of people they bed.
they will crow that it's inappropriate for children so there will be no lessons on how to properly apply a condom, even to teens. it's teaching them the wrong things. no lessons on the diversity of sexual organ growth, none on how to obtain consent properly, none on how to recognize when you feel unsafe in your body. if you are a teenager, you have probably already been sexualized at some point in your life. you will have seen someone also-your-age who is splashed across a tv screen or a magazine or married to someone three times your age. you will watch people pull their hair into pigtails so they look like you. so that they can be sexy because of youth. one of the most common pornography searches involves newly-18 young women. girls. the words "barely legal," a hiss of glass sand over your skin.
barely legal. there are bills in place that will not allow people to feel safe in their own bodies. there are people working so hard to punish any person for having sex in a way that isn't god-fearing and submissive. heteronormative. the sex has to be at their feet, on your knees, your eyes wet. when was the first time you saw another person crying in pornography and thought - okay but for real. she looks super unhappy. later, when you are unhappy, you will close your eyes and ignore the feeling and act the role you have been taught to keep playing. they will punish the sex workers, remove the places they can practice their trade safely. they will then make casual jokes about how they sexually harass their nanny.
and they love sex but they hate that you're having sex. you need to have their ornamental, perfunctory, dispassionate sex. so you can't kiss your girlfriend in the bible belt because it is gross to have sex with someone of the same gender. so you can't get your tubes tied in new england because you might change your mind. so you can't admit you were sexually assaulted because real men don't get hurt, you should be grateful. you cannot handle your own body, you cannot handle the risks involved, let other people decide that for you. you aren't ready yet.
but they need you to have sex because you need to have kids. at 15, you are old enough to parent. you are not old enough to hear the word fuck too many times on television.
they are horrified by sex and they never stop talking about it, thinking about it, making everything unnecessarily preverted. the saying - a thief thinks everyone steals. they stand up at their podiums and they look out at the crowd and they sign a bill into place that makes sexwork even more unsafe and they stand up and smile and sign a bill that makes gender-affirming care illegal and they get up and they shrug their shoulders and write don't say gay and they get up, and they make the world about sex, but this horrible, plastic vision of it that they have. this wretched, emotionless thing that holds so much weight it's staggering. they put their whole spine behind it and they push and they say it's normal!
this horrible world they live in. disgusted and also obsessed.
#this shifts gender so much bc it actually affects everyone#yes it's a gendered phenomenon. i have written a LOT about how different genders experience it. that's for a different post.#writeblr#ps my comments about seeing someone cry -- this is not to shame any person#and on this blog we support workers.#at the same time it's a really hard experience to see someone that looks like you. clearly in agony. and have them forced to keep going.#when you're young it doesn't necessarily look like acting. it looks scary. and that's what this is about - the fact that teens#have likely already been exposed to that definition of things. because the internet exists#and without the context of healthy education. THAT is the image burned into their minds about what it looks like.#it's also just one of those personal nuanced biases -#at 19 i thought it was normal to be in pain. to cry. to not-like-it. that it should be perfunctory.#it was what i had seen.#and it didn't help that my religious upbringing was like . 'yeah that's what you get for premarital. but also for the reference#we do think you should never actually enjoy it lol'#so like the point im making is that ppl get exposed to that stuff without the context of something more tender#and assume .... 'oh. so it's fine i am not enjoying myself'. and i know they do because I DID.#he was my first boyfriend. how was i supposed to know any different#i didn't even have the mental wherewithal to realize im a lesbian . like THAT used to suffering.
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something something a chat i am in discussing the loneliness of Armand who needs someone to define him and see him, so
"...it was ghastly and awful and loathsome, and beautiful all at the same time."
and yeah i kinda just want to give ppl hugs with anything i do and talk to them in hushed tones, so there you go
#art is a coping mechanism#fan art#interview with the vampire#daniel molloy#iwtv armand#armand de romanus#vampire armand#armand#eric bogosian#assad zaman#i still need to figure out Assad's anatomy#he's too beautiful#it makes the process tougher#Eric's face is fascinating in a completely different way#Assad's features seem simple to capture because ANIME VIBE but it's all about the tiny nuances#artist's rant#lots of words in the tags#also tmi but i perceive the world through touch and boy does sketching Eric tingle my brain in the best manner#iwtv spoilers#iwtv fanart#iwtv art#amc iwtv#devil's minion#armandaniel
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you don't need to write a dark deconstruction of Peter Pan where he's willing to kill people and his state of eternal childhood makes him morally ambiguous, JM Barrie already wrote one and it's called Peter Pan
#peter pan#literature#peter and wendy#media literacy#evil peter pan is so tired and without nuance fr#he doesn't know enough to be evil
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Council of lovefools.
[First] Prev <–-> Next
#poorly drawn mdzs#mdzs#wei wuxian#jiang yanli#jiang cheng#They don't have an actual sleepover in this scene but the vibes were so sleepover coded...I had to get them cozied up.#Late night talks with friends and family are some of the best conversations.#My siblings and I used to have room sleepovers with each other (Actually an excuse to stay up and talk about runescape)#Currently my flatmates and I also have really great heart to hearts late into the night.#Pondering shit like 'What defines confidence?“ and ”Why are people terrified of letting themselves fall in love?"#All that aside; There is a really great conversation between JC and WWX here. They are so close and yet so far way from each other!#Fundamentally they *agree* about many things - but JC now has to play the role of someone more 'mature'.#His temper is reigned in and he had to take a more nuanced approach. Whereas WWX can be far more reactionary.#JC has changed to become someone more mature (or at least he is trying).#Contrast this attitude with the scene *right* after where WWX literally goes baby mode with JYL. Rolling around going “I'm Fwee years old”.#When children are hurt we comfort them with hugs and warm food and a laugh. It's not enough when you're an adult. It's not simple anymore.#WWX is stuck in the past when everyone else is shifting and moving on! It's a depression allegory (and just...actual depression)#But we also get to see how some things have stayed the same. They still bicker about soup. They still tease. They are still together.#They all care for each other very much but they are struggling against trauma and are not equipped to talk about it.#You can't really blame WWX for being so protective over JYL. But JC is right: “You don't have a say in who she likes.”#It may have started as an arranged marriage but *she* is *choosing* what her heart wants. JC sees that. WWX cannot.#The final act of love is letting go after all.
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Love that Oppenheimer is a deeply disturbing horror movie about a man forced to accept that he is, in a person, the representative manifestation of mankind’s evil in committing one of the greatest horrors of human history - LITERALLY acting as the modern Prometheus, tormented by his sins for the remainder of time. Knowing that he will never be pitied and his actions will forever be utterly unforgivable because the blood of genocide and the potential of total human annihilation will eternally drip from his hands.
But also the simultaneous indictment by the film that to blame a single person for the Manhattan Project is to refuse to accept your own capacity for great evil if the ends ever seem to justify the means, and the culpability of every member of a species that lets itself create something so unspeakably terrible.
Hate that twitter’s take on such a nuanced and brilliantly handled examination of those issues is “movie bad because protagonist not evil enough.”
#what’s that quote about the problem with othering the enemy in media is that we can no longer see our own reflection in their eyes#oppenheimer’s motivations WERE sympathetic that’s the POINT#we SHOULD feel uncomfortable with our sympathy for him - the film goes out of its way to make us feel uncomfortable about it#we should be uncomfortable with the fact that we might have made the same decisions as him in his place#yes he’s evil but his evilness represents the evil that we might all accept in ourselves#twitter simply cannot handle nuanced takes on things ig (tumblr does though - the posts on here have been surprisingly excellent)#oppenheimer#(tldr - look if you walk out of Oppenheimer thinking it somehow celebrates the man then you may need to retake 9th grade Literature srry)#films
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conservatives really wanna act like the “woke left” is winning the culture war or whatever when people are out here making basil and dorian brothers and casting white men to play heathcliff in 2024
#me#Wuthering heights#the picture of Dorian gray#say it with me: progress is not necessarily inevitable. representation is not inevitable. you have to fight for it. you cannot wait for it.#fuck off tho this is so frustrating fr#there’s another example I was thinking of as well but it’s a little more nuanced/controversial so I’m keeping it to myself#‘people are casting for political agendas’ OK SO WHY IS HEATHCLIFF WHITE THEN. HES LITERALLY NOT SUPPOSED TO BE IN THE SOURCE MATERIAL#AND YET SOMEHOW IN THE 2024 HOLLYWOOD MOVIE HES STILL GONNA BE PLAYED BY A WHITE GUY#fuck off
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As a person of colour, Toshiro is so unbelievably relatable once you realize the reasons and emotions behind his actions. He's been microaggressed upon p much all the time down to the name people call him, but he continues to be silent about it because of the cultural pressure he was raised on of having to be polite and kind and not to speak his true thoughts.
I can relate so hard to his jealousy about laios being able to be more open and confident and speak his mind. I can never bring myself to dislike him at all esp during the laios/toshiro fight because both of them are coming from very real relatable places to me. Its a nuanced conflict. Toshiro has a lot of pent up emotions he needed to get out for all the reasons i said before. And laios was rightfully upset about Toshiro not seeing him the same way he sees him and hiding all of this from him. Both of these guys are in the wrong in this situation. It's not a good guy / bad guy thing.
They both are different kinds of autistic people under different circumstances and I can honestly relate to them both on different things.
Also the scene right after dude gives him the bell and gives them a way out if things were to get bad. And with that we see he obviously cares for laios and the rest of the party despite everything.
All in all. Love u Toshiro they could never make me hate u !!
#dungeon meshi#toshiro nakamoto#Also coming as a manga reader toshiros later actions wouldn't make sense if he fully hated laios he still cares for the entire party#Laios included!!#Sorry for the random ramble but seeing ppl hate on toshiro like the situation isn't nuanced got me PISSEDD
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what fear a man like you brings upon a woman like me (please don’t look at me)
#mouthwashing#art#anya mouthwashing#anya#illustration#artists on tumblr#fanart#mouthwashing fanart#lyrics from ptolomaea by ethel cain#abort that thang anya#i played the funny game#i have many thoughts. number one being i think we need to learn to not fandomify every piece of media#like yes please draw fanart and have fun and stuff#but maybe interact with the characters that are abusers and abuser apologists a little more carefully!#specifically curly. lots of people woobify him when hes an enabler#obviously not a bad person inherently but a lot more nuanced than it seems. i dont really like seeing anya x curly art#he took away her autonomy in the game after she told him abt jimmy. i think they cared about each other but its deeper than surface level#anyway good game. yeah
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Did you think I was done? Ahahahaha no, I have more.
Because chapter 70 of MOMU gave me the very dynamic between them that I missed so much, I just blacked out and started drawing uncontrollably lmao
Also. ALSO. I noticed a while ago that Prowl has the habit of..like…constantly frowning. So. I did a bit of research and made this graph.
In 70 chapters, Prowl frowns rougly 104 times. And the intensity of this gesture is very clearly correlated with the development of his relationship with Jazz, as you can see ahahahahah It might be wrong tho don’t take me seriously I’m not good with graphs
#maccadam#transformers#prowl#jazz#jazzprowl#fic fanart#momu fanart#I just#mmmmm#For the whole fic Prowl had to think twice about everything Jazz says#every information could end up being wrong#sometimes even without Jazz realising it#so when Prowl says#he’s trusting Jazz. it’s.#also it totally wasn’t me googling ‘believing and trusting nuance difference in english’#the moment I realised the difference I think my brain started rollercoaster loops#he can’t believe him but he found enough faith to trust him#while. YES. For the whole story Jazz couldn’t fucking be believed#list e n#Jazz did a lot of things for Prowl#fucktons of big and small gestures to show that yes he likes loves and appreciates Prowl#I’m so happy Prowl is returning this energy#like#remember that scene a while back when Jazz kissed Prowl? Cool cool okay. Did Prowl kiss him? nope. It was one sided gestures#*gesture. That kiss didn’t make me feel like it’s truly something precious because Jazz started it but Prowl didn’t do quite the same#but this👆. This feels so much more important for me. Because Prowl#who is for the whole story was mister I calculate every chance of possible betrayal. Prowl whos entire personality is to trust nobody#Prowl goes. Fuck that I trust you. You feel me?#it wouldn’t be the same if he said I love you. Because love is very much something you don’t have a lot of control over.#but to trust someone? It’s a choice Prowl had to consciously make. You see what I mean? I love it. oh fuck I ran out of tags..
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Not to be that person, but if Kamala Harris were a white man with the exact same ideals, positions, and beliefs, it wouldn’t have even been a competition. Realising that the worst thing you can apparently be is a woman, is truly devastating.
#us elections#us politics#kamala harris#politics#if you want to read my little think piece just go on my page#and to the men who said this is a reductive take#you’re either too dumb or too ignorant to realise that it is a privilege that you can’t imagine people would refuse to vote a woman#simply because she is a woman#misogyny isn’t just a silly thing tumblr users complain about for the sake of complaining#it’s real and happening and dismissing its prevelance is just as misogynistic as the people refusing to vote a woman into the white house#and i‘m also not saying it was the only reason she lost but i dont think it’s wrong to note that misogyny as well as racism played a part#also fuck you if you can’t acknowledge that your fuckass country is full of white supremacists and violent misogyny#you can stay performative all you want but she did not lose because of policy america has always voted based on vibe#fucking trump got elected the first time because they wanted an authentic outsider#because in case you didn’t know he had zero political experience#plus#contrary to popular belief i actually do have a more nuanced opinion on harris than this#but i still stand by my very basic observation that america is a racist and misogynistic country#and anyone refusing to believe this is delusional xo
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i've always just headcannoned that Stiles has keys, passkeys and codes to everyones stuff. you have a house key, car key, or something needing a code? Stiles has several copies on himself and hidden elsewhere.
like this dude has sticky fingers, and eyes everywhere. he's got the ability to get it into the sheriff's station, the school, hospital and vet. like if it's a mildly important place or is just slightly interesting, chances are high; he's got a key and code to get in
every time they try to change codes or keys, he has copies made a day later. no one is safe. no one.
people try to complain to the Sheriff, in the hopes he'll be able to stop him
he tells them all to suck it up.
while Stiles is the light of his life, he's also a feral gremlin,
the sheriff has been trying to keep him out of his stuff since he could walk
stiles also 100% has house and car keys to all of the pack
it drives argent insane that he can't keep him out
they've tried changing their stuff
it doesn't work
he also somehow got their passwords
(it wasn't hard, they're all stupid and have easy to guess passwords)
((besides Lydia and Danny))
#stiles stilinski#teen wolf#sheriff stilinski#he's so done with everything#let this man rest#hale pack#mccall pack#lydia martin#danny mahealani#inspired by mama mccall being horrified but unsurprised by the fact that Stiles has keys to her home#and also Peter getting Stiles to login to Scott's laptop#he's a nuance but we love him#melissa mccall#peter hale#chris argent#i headcannon that
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you're grabbing lunch with a nice man and he gives you that strange grimace-smile that's popular right now; an almost sardonic "twist" of his mouth while he looks literally down on you. it looks like he practiced the move as he leans back, arms folded. he just finished reciting the details of NFTs to you and explaining Oppenheimer even though he only watched a youtube about it and hasn't actually seen it. you are at the bottom of your wine glass.
you ask the man across from you if he has siblings, desperately looking for a topic. literally anything else.
he says i don't like small talk. and then he smiles again, watching you.
a few years ago, you probably would have said you're above celebrity gossip, but honestly, you've been kind of enjoying the dumb shit of it these days. with the rest of the earth burning, there's something familiar and banal about dragging ariana grande through the mud. you think about jeanette mccurdy, who has often times gently warned the world she's not as nice as she appears. you liked i'm glad my mom died but it made you cry a lot.
he doesn't like small talk, figure out something to say.
you want to talk about responsibility, and how ariana grande is only like 6 days older than you are - which means she just turned 30 and still dresses and acts like a 13 year old, but like sexy. there's something in there about the whole thing - about insecurity, and never growing up, and being sexualized from a young age.
people have been saying that gay people are groomers. like, that's something that's come back into the public. you have even said yourself that it's just ... easier to date men sometimes. you would identify as whatever the opposite of "heteroflexible" is, but here you are again, across from a man. you like every woman, and 3 people on tv. and not this guy. but you're trying. your mother is worried about you. she thinks it's not okay you're single. and honestly this guy was better before you met, back when you were just texting.
wait, shit. are you doing the same thing as ariana grande? are you looking for male validation in order to appease some internalized promise of heteronormativity? do you conform to the idea that your happiness must result in heterosexuality? do you believe that you can resolve your internal loneliness by being accepted into the patriarchy? is there a reason dating men is easier? why are you so scared of fucking it up with women? why don't you reach out to more of them? you have a good sense of humor and a big ol' brain, you could have done a better job at online dating.
also. jesus christ. why can't you just get a drink with somebody without your internal feminism meter pinging. although - in your favor (and judgement aside) in the case of your ariana grande deposition: you have been in enough therapy you probably wouldn't date anyone who had just broken up with their wife of many years (and who has a young child). you'd be like - maybe take some personal time before you begin this journey. like, grande has been on broadway, you'd think she would have heard of the plot of hamlet.
he leans forward and taps two fingers to the table. "i'm not, like an andrew tate guy," he's saying, "but i do think partnership is about two people knowing their place. i like order."
you knew it was going to be hard. being non-straight in any particular way is like, always hard. these days you kind of like answering the question what's your sexuality? with a shrug and a smile - it's fine - is your most common response. like they asked you how your life is going and not to reveal your identity. you like not being straight. you like kissing girls. some days you know you're into men, and sometimes you're sitting across from a man, and you're thinking about the power of compulsory heterosexuality. are you into men, or are you just into the safety that comes from being seen with them? after all, everyone knows you're failing in life unless you have a husband. it almost feels like a gradebook - people see "straight married" as being "all A's", and anything else even vaguely noncompliant as being ... like you dropped out of the school system. you cannot just ignore years of that kind of conditioning, of course you like attention from men.
"so let's talk boundaries." he orders more wine for you, gesturing with one hand like he's rousing an orchestra. sir, this is a fucking chain restaurant. "I am not gonna date someone who still has male friends. also, i don't care about your little friends, i care about me. whatever stupid girls night things - those are lower priority. if i want you there, you're there."
he wasn't like this over text, right? you wouldn't have been even in the building if he was like this. you squint at him. in another version of yourself, you'd be running. you'd just get up and go. that's what happens on the internet - people get annoyed, and they just leave. you are locked in place, almost frozen. you need to go to the bathroom and text someone to call you so you have an excuse, like it's rude to just-leave. like he already kind of owns you. rudeness implies a power paradigm, though. see, even your social anxiety allows the patriarchy to get to you.
you take a sip of the new glass of wine. maybe this will be a funny story. maybe you can write about it on your blog. maybe you can meet ariana grande and ask her if she just maybe needs to take some time to sit and think about her happiness and how she measures her own success.
is this settling down? is this all that's left in your dating pool? just accepting that someone will eventually love you, and you have to stop being picky about who "makes" you a wife?
you look down to your hand, clutching the knife.
#writeblr#this is a mashup of like 3 dates i accidentally went on lol#by that i mean that i was out with a woman on a date in 2 of these situations#and a man just. joined us. and we were too awkward to say anything while he tried to ''date'' me#& one was a longterm friend that i was like. you what????#like he's nice he's a doctor and my mom was SO happy she was like raquel think about it#''it's a perfect love story you grew up together and reconnected as adults and like the same things and he's friends with ur brother#and his sister is one of ur close friends!!!''#yes but alas. he is a boy . she only likes girls. can i make it any more obvious#anyway im tryna write about like the force of male attention being actually incredibly ingrained to women like we are SUPPOSED to like it#it's seen as the only important thing#even if ur gay#and it's a nuanced thing idk#and while rn i i.d. as lesbian#like .... it wouldn't be UNTRUE to say i am probably like ''cusp bisexual'' bc i CAN experience attraction to men bc like .#sexuality is fluid...#don't tell straight ppl tho bc they do not understand the concept that ppl don't necessarily need a solid everlasting label#they're like GET in the BOX#if ur gay & in boston i'm 30 and pretty please come kiss me.#(i usually only date older ppl sorry in advance tho)
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i’ve been loving watching critical role recently if for no other reason than because i get to watch a decent portion of viewers actively falling for cult tactics lmao
a forbes article describes cult tactics as when cult leaders “censor dissenting viewpoints, promote a distorted narrative and use relentless repetition and peer pressure”
ludinus needing to monologue at everyone he meets. cherry picking what information to let people know (ie the orb). showing popular world leaders (gods?) at their absolute worst as a means to win over the vulnerable. creating dissent between cult prospects and the people who they’re close to outside the cult. doesn’t take no for an answer. repeating his points over and over, in whatever context he thinks will be most persuasive. targeting people who’ve lost everything. convincing people that they’re special
matt is a genius.
#yes i cited my dang source lmao#every time i see a viewer dunking on imogen and orym for taking the gods’ side i take 3d8 psychic damage#media literacy i am BEGGING you#like oh noooo orym doesn’t like the man who killed his family. how insane of him. -_-#like i’m not saying the gods are faultless#but i am saying that they are nuanced and important to the world in a way that ludinus is trying to obscure#critical role#critrole#critical role spoilers#bells hells#critical role campaign 3#orym of the air ashari#dorian storm#ashton greymoore#fearne calloway#imogen temult#laudna#chetney pock o'pea#braius doomseed#oh also. the man literally fucked over laudna so hard as he left and yall stillllll wanna lick his boots so bad#mine#sorry for being salty but i do feel a little insane consuming recent fan content
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Art prompt of Shen Qingqiu holding the aro flag (fits his color scheme)
the real reason this man doesn't realise he's tripping every romance flag in the story
#svsss#scum villain#shen qingqiu#sqq#aro#aromantic flag#i'm now just stuck on the idea of sqq trying to explain the nuance of pride flags to the Qing Jing Peak disciples#he Does Not Want to have this conversation#it started when he realised he was going to have to have The Talk with his disciples at SOME point and couldn't figure out a way#to finesse them into going to talk to mqf about it instead. it rapidly derailed as sqq got more muddled up in modern day terminology and#the Scholarly Peak Disciples would NOT fucking let it go#he would really rather die than continue this conversation; this man went through enough of his (2 lives) life without examining his own#sexuality he does NOT intend to start now!! please stop asking clarifying question!! you know what just don't have sex ever!!!#just!!!! don't date!!!!!! don't do that!!!! isn't it better for everyone to just not do that?????? conversation over!#my art#thanks for the suggestion!
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The thing abt john winchester is that he is too complex for the majority of the spn fandom and for a good portion of the writers on the show too.
Because at his core john is about love over everything else. When he looks up at his sons (yes, up, the fact that they’re both taller than him>>>>>), there is love seeping achingly from every single pore of his being even as he abuses them, as he destroys their souls beyond belief. He does it all entirely out of love. And he is so, so wrong for it. A part of him knows it. But he wants to keep dean alive, and he wants to keep Sam pure. And he loves them so much. And he damages them so horribly. John Winchester is the foundation upon which they are both built, they only become more of what he made them as the series goes on. Sam stops fighting it, Dean continues to mold into his image no matter how hard he tries to fight it.
Hell puts them both on steroids, but their individual trauma responses that influence this are the foundations that John built into them. No wonder azazel wanted sam to win so badly. John Winchester crafted his sons into alastair and Lucifer’s ideal victims, respectively, and dean was a better (worse) john than John ever was. John held out in hell. Dean acquiesced to his abuser despite all of his efforts to fight him, and he’s never been the same since.
Sam fought like hell, and he fought destiny, but at his core, he did what John always wanted him to by doing what dean wanted him to do, and then he stops fighting at all, loses the fire he showed john in adolescence that john immediately notices when he returns in s14.
And the sad thing is. They filled their roles so well that John is saddened by what they’ve become. He didn’t want dean to break. He didn’t want Sam to be dimmed. He’s sad to see what Sam is like in s14. In the process of recovering his wife, he ensured he would mold his sons into what he wanted them to be, and when he got what he wanted, he was devastated.
John Winchester is so driven by love and grief and he’s so filled to the brim with both that it’s painful to watch him on screen because he destroyed his family because of it. And he wanted this all along but he didn’t realize what he’d have to give up to get it.
#supernatural#john winchester#sam winchester#dean winchester#my meta#honestly the thing is#if john had survived past s2#I don’t think he would get the hate he receives today#bc the thing is. jdms portrayal is ridiculously complex and beautiful#that when the majority of people write him they lose all his nuance#the fact that John was gone more than he was there immensely damaged his rep in the eyes of the fandom#I think if John were alive for longer he would get similar treatment to dean#both narratively and fandom perception wise#he already does to some extent amongst some people#he’s an excellent complex character#but people can’t handle complex#that man is an abuser#that man also loves more deeply than anyone#you know who also fits those descriptors?#dean#and look how fandom views him
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