#but he is the least boring thing about the trilogy

[spiders-hth-is-an-outlier]

Look, I don't have any strong desire to stand up for Kylo Ren fans -- primarily because I am personally incapable of experiencing strong fan emotions about anything in the Star Wars sequels, on account of them being embarrassingly inept films from an embarrassingly inept filmmaker (not you, Rian, you're doing amazing sweetie) -- but it is low-key annoying how far off base all those posts are that are like, but Finn and Poe are right there, are you stupid or something? Like, what's not clicking here? Obviously Oscar Isaac and John Boyega are traditionally handsome movie star men, and obviously Adam Driver is -- not exactly that. People aren't really disagreeing there.

It shouldn't take some kind of fan studies scholar to understand that Kylo Ren stans are reacting to story elements -- to whatever combo of soul bonds and fall-and-redemption tragedy and just plain villain kink turns their particular crank. It's so weird to see people scornfully be like, why can't you like the hot ones like a normal person? Because the hot ones weren't as interesting, is why! Nothing in the movies is all that deep, but whatever meat there is on the bone at all is entirely about the love-hate relationship Rey and Luke and Han and Leia all have with Kylo Ren, there are not emotional arcs anywhere else that matter very much to the story. The only other character who has anything resembling a personal journey is Finn, and all that's ever going to be said about that is said in the first 20 minutes, really.

Not everyone gets turned on by someone getting an interesting storyline, but if you've been in fandom for more than five seconds, it shouldn't be weird to discover that plenty of fans do pick their faves for story-related reasons, and not just because they're the most handsome actor on the screen. It's why we call half of our faves scraggly wet cats and that kind of thing!

[beefycupcakes]

I watched the Cars trilogy recently and with that came a wave of nostalgia and a strange desire to make my own designs for the cars as humans. Aka taking all the charm out of Cars but scratching the brain itch.

So, no need to drag out the intro any longer, I have some notes written out about em for those who might be interested or just bored.

Lightning McQueen:

I tried to make his suit look as professional as possible, with references pulled straight from McQueen's paint job/stickers, while also keeping in mind that I do intend to draw him more so I didn't want to go too crazy with the design. In a perfect world I would've let my maximalist cravings win, but alas let's keep it digestible for my sanity.

I feel like everyone's kinda on this unspoken agreement that McQueen as a human would pretty much look just like Owen Wilson, and that's the big picture here. I used Wilson as inspiration while tweaking and exaggerating a few things to my preference. (Okay, well not everyone, lmao.)

The chevron markings on the front cut off at the side seams not wrapping around the entire suit as to not clash with the sponsor logo on the back.

Also, he's wearing special gloves to help him grip & have control over the steering wheel. I think sometimes that looks a little weird when his sleeves are down & cuffed, but I just feel like he needs to have the gloves there— especially when he comes out of the top half of the suit. (It's also lowkey supposed to mirror his 4 tires when you consider his shoes are also black.)

So yeah, that's basically all I have to to say regarding Lightning McQueen's page. I feel like a lot of my design choices are self explanatory and, honestly probably shared universally... I mean, he's really cut & dry. (But I love him ⚡︎)

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Mater:

I'm not gonna lie, Mater was a bit challenging for me. I definitely had to step out of my comfort zone but I wanted to stay true to the character and not butcher anything.

My first thought was to give him a fishing pole to substitute for the tow hook— but then the more I was thinking about it, the more that felt so... out of place? Radiator Springs is in Arizona, which is (not entirely, but mostly depicted in the movie as) a desert. And even though there are beautiful bodies of water in Arizona, in the movie I don't recall seeing any prominent ones, at least in relation to Mater. So, scratch that, instead I gave him a lasso, which isn't supposed to entirely substitute for the tow truck— no, he still drives a tow truck, but the lasso is so he can grab people/things similarly to Tow Truck Mater (very cartoony). My explanation for this is the cattle ranch. Yeah, Mater is a tow truck driver but perhaps he has a side hustle, or hobby, if you will.

Also, I didn't want to make him... dirty(??) Like, yeah, of course, Mater would obviously get a bit filthy from time to time, it's just in his nature, but that is NOT going to be the core of my design. In regards to the rust happening on him, I felt like instead I would substitute this with being very tan. Again, Arizona is a desert. Because of this, he would take off his shirt often, and this would substitute for the missing hood like on Tow Truck Mater. The removal of the shirt also reveals just how tan Mater actually is.

It's his uniformed overalls that have his original��aqua color, but from years of wear & tear they've been patched up with brown patches, this would also reference the rusting. The one strap is supposed to mimic the one headlight being broken, and I know that's a stretch, believe me, I wanted to do something with his eyes but eyes are not the headlights in the Cars universe..... think about this. Think about it really hard... if you know what the headlights are in the Cars universe then this actually makes perfect sense.

He is taller and wider than McQueen, which is a reference to the literal frame of their vehicle counterparts. (A little hard to picture with these images, but eventually I'll draw them together!)

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That's all I have to say really, but do let me know what you guys think! Gas it up and it might encourage me to make a part 2 with some of the other characters! Who would you like to see next? ♡ Thank you so much for reading & have a great day, Kachow!!

[jonathan-cranes-mistress-of-fear]

An Honest Opinion on Cillian Murphy and his role as Jonathan Crane

This is gonna be long, so buckle up hroo hraas

Cillian Muprhy was the actor who played Jonathan Crane in the Nolanverse Trilogy. For many fans, if it wasn't btas, it was Nolanverse that introduced them to Scarecrow. Unfortunately, it's a pretty poor introduction.

Don't get me wrong, he's a good actor, but is is NO Jonathan Crane. He actually wanted to be Batman but those in charge saw his pretty blue eyes, became obsessed and basically threw away any previous idea of who their Scarecrow should be so Cillian could act in the movie.

The director goes on to host multiple interviews in which he fawns over Cillian's eyes. This is literally the only thing he has to say about Scarecrow. This is also one of the reasons you see them focused o so much in certain clips, Cillian was actually instructed to take off his glasses as much as possible.

Now, whats the problem? Well, Cillian is first and foremost way too traditionally handsome to be playing such a character, a character that was literally bullied for his looks in ever comic released prior. (and I do realize that handsome men can be bullied for their looks, but the comics only ever describe Crane as gangly and nerdy. Unlikable. Queer Fellow. Etc. And I honestly don't expect that kind of nuance when he was hired for his PRETTY EYES ) I don't even think the movie comments on his looks. Anyhow.

His roles in the movies, for me, are largely forgettable. The only iconic comment is "Would you like to see my mask" That's literally all anyone remembers. Oh and maybe the flaming horse, but that's never talked about by fans. So, it wasn't impactful

I doubt Cillian has even touched a comic book tbh. If he did, he's at least TRY to be scary. His costume---which largely isn't his choice--was uninspired and uncreative. A suit and a burlap mask with some maggots for some reason??? Boring. (Note: even the gotham actor read the comics. It's not hard to do some research into who you'll be acting as)

Compare that to comics out at the time, Year One, Batman Adventures, Batman Annual 19, even Long Halloween predated this movie! They had PLENTY to reference.

And what's worse? the fandom. Oh god the fandom. While I'm grateful many current fans got their start with the Nolan trilogy, they all largely have moved on to bigger and better canons. They're not who I have beef with. It's the Cillian Murphy fangirls. Not Jonathan Crane. Cillian. The tag is largely infested with them, and they often tag any and every photo of the man as Jonathan Crane. This does nothing for me, except annoy. I've blocked dozens of blogs for this. It's petty, sure, but I can guarantee you that tagging your Cillian pictures as every character he's acted as ever, does not mean you'll get more interaction. You'll get the opposite actually.

Do note, fanart and illustrated portrayals of Cillian are the one exception. Artists have taken his very boring interpretation and turned it into something awesome. Y'all keep doing you. You rock.

Cillian is not a bad actor, but he's a bad Crane.

-mic drop-

[gamerbot-22]

Touchstarved LIs as Study Buddies

Because when I was studying for my macroeconomics final the only way I survived was imagining a rotating cast of blorbos helping me out (I got a 70% btw)

Recommended Listening: Zelda & Chill Trilogy

TW/CWs: Potential Accidental Canon Deviancy, not proofread.

Can be read as romantic or platonic, whatever floats your boat! Likes and reblogs appreciated!

Special thanks to @asexual-abomination for helping with Lea and Mhin <3

🕊️ Kuras

You two will study and do nothing else.

Okay, not exactly, but it’s 90% study with a couple mental breaks tossed in to keep your mind sharp.

And you can bet your ass he’s making sure you’re drinking water and getting some good brain food in you (good luck with his cooking lol)

He’s not big on the idea of pulling all-nighters, but if it’s a necessity (say, you’re cramming,) he’ll turn into something of a spotter, making sure that you stay sane and make the most of the time you have before you eventually conk out.

Has anyone here seen Elementary? There’s a scene early in the series where Watson helps Sherlock stay awake by showing him how to do squats to get his blood pumping. Kuras does the same.

Also he’s making flashcards! Unironically I think this is a highlight for him.

His Best Subject is obviously any kind of Biological Science, but I think he’s also really good for History.

🪄 Leander

He’s good at studying on his own, but the second he’s in a Buddy System he just starts doing. The Most.

I’m talking like an hour and a half at least of set up where he’s getting drinks and snacks and a nest of pillows and blankets set up so your backs don’t get sore hunched over a table.

Lowkey I think he’s trying to be The Study Buddy Ever for you, but he doesn’t quite clock that all the prep work is eating into your study time and while that can be okay if the test isn’t pressing, if you’re cramming it’s a problem.

Once he’s settled though, he’s actually really helpful.

Very “there’s no stupid questions!” about it all, and will work with you to make sure you’ve got it all down.

Every magician worth his salt knows how to study, damnit, he’s just a social himbo.

His best subjects I think are Psychology and Social Studies. He’s a People Person.

🦊 Vere

He’s either not helping even a little bit by not showing up or not helping even a little bit by being a distraction.

He is bored off his ass almost the entire time, and he will make it your problem by just going on the most random of tangents after he’s done complaining.

And failing that, he’ll just go take a big nap somewhere.

He just curls right up and goes to snoozeville for like an hour before waking up and going “you’re STILL at it???”

If you want him to engage with you—or even just stick around, really—you’re going to have to bribe him in some way or another.

Of course he asks for the most out of pocket shit but tbh I think if you’ve got good snacks and something cozy he’ll just take it as a break.

Generally though he’s very much just doing his own thing while you study, it’s barely beneficial to either of you.

Except sometimes you talk at him while he draws you mayhaps…

It’s canon that he’s really artistically talented so I think his Best Subjects are Art and Literature. Those are the two things you have any hope of getting help from him on.

⛩️ Ais

Ais also takes some convincing to come around and help, tbh—

He doesn’t strike me as a guy that really studies, not just because of his personality but because he’s literally part of a Hivemind I’m pretty certain he can just ping for information if he really needs it.

But once he’s gotten settled he’s actually a surprisingly good rubber duck, letting you talk at him about theory and formula while he pokes around your space.

Like Vere, I think he naps if he’s not directly involved but he a) usually gives a head’s up but b) ends up snoring really loud which makes studying a nightmare.

Sometimes he’ll actually pay attention—maybe even leaning over the back of your chair to read over your shoulder sometimes—and you find out he’s really good at actually taking a look at a concept and Getting It really fast.

Just… don’t ask him to explain it to you.

That’s a different skill set that I don’t think he quite has off the bat.

Surprisingly maybe I think his Best Subject is Math/Arithmetic. There’s just something about how cut and dry the formulas are that make it click for him really well. Also lowkey good at Biology, specifically the behavioral side of Animal Biology.

🪡 Mhin

Good Fucking Luck

Genuinely, I don’t think Mhin has either the patience or the social bandwidth to be a decent study partner.

The best you’re getting out of them is someone who’s leading by example.

Mhin will get their own book, sit next to you, and read. And if you make any kind of noise or significant disturbance, they’ll grumble or nudge your chair to tell you to be quiet.

You can ask them to help with review questions if you want, but I think unless it’s something they already know, don’t expect any type of feedback outside of eye contact.

If it’s a regular thing and you get the chance to get used to each other, they might occasionally mention stuff in their own reading that they find interesting/you might find interesting, but generally it’s few and far between.

Just because they’re not really helping doesn’t mean they want to be a distraction, unlike some…

Like Kuras, I think Mhin is really good at Science, specifically Anatomy, but they also have a bit of a soft spot for Poetry and Strategy.

[luceafarul-de-dimineata]

Showing whb characters animated movies

You were in Paradise Lost because you ~acidently~ burned your hand and needed to be seen by your boyfriend Gamigin. Why you were there you asked him to watch a movie from the human world with you to pass the time. You and Gamigin had to put your collective knowledge together to figure out how to connect the phone to the old ass TV they have in Paradise Lost (those small shitty TVs they have in hospitals)

When you put on "How to train your dragon", Gamigin has his mouth wide open looking at the screen. He adores the movie and makes you both reenact his favourite scenes of Hiccup and Toothless. He would become so autistic about the whole franchise and you won't hear the end of it. Marbas and Buer probably give you the cold sholder for making Gamigin "more annoying than he already was" as they put it.

It becomes tradition between you two to watch the trilogy at least once a week (though he always tells you how much better the shows were). Bonus: He has Romantic Flight as his ringtone for you.

Watching Shrek with Beelzebub was an experience. He once shot you a message asking what the most influential film in the human world was and you said Shrek, parly ironically. Next thing you know, you're in one of the countries in Hell watching Shrek with Beelzebub. You two were laughing through the whole thing, partly because of the movie, partly because of your comments about it. He probably starts imitating Shrek's accent in the worst scenarios possible. Once yelled at an angel "Stay out of my swamp!" even though he was on the streets of Tartaros (Mammon at least found it funny).

After you beg Leviathan for 2 days, he finally caves in and watches the My Little Pony Movie with you. He would never in a million years admit that he enjoyed it, but you can still hear him humming some of the songs in it. Surprisingly, he'll let you talk about it, mostly because he likes your voice, but also because he thinks your analysis of it is interesting. Maybe if you're not a threat to Hell and you stop giving Foras headpats, he'll show you a real unicorn one day. If you call him Pricess Twilight Sparkle he'll hang you with no hesitation, though his glare is much more likely to kill you than the rope.

You were back in Paradise Lost, bored out of your mind when Morax comes to you with what you think is a smile on his face. He hands you the DVD for "Beauty and the Beast" and explains how Bathin had gifted it to him before he moved to Nifleim. He asks if you're interested in watching it together to cure your boredom (haha). It was a pleasant watch and by the end Morax was in tears. You cuddled while he just recapped the movie to you while sniffling. "A-and she still love him because h-he was beautiful on the inside".

You find out that Morax never watched a movie before because he was constantly busy, so it must have been a moving experience for him. He will 100% say that you're the beauty and he's the beast unironically because this man's irony part of the brain got surgecally removed at birth.

[nadiajustbe]

When it comes to HMC trilogy, I take almost no criticism, as it just a wonderful written-story with alive and relatable characters. However, If I had to name a part I'd found reasonable to criticise and may critises myself, I'd say it's Lettie Hatter's arc.

Not because it was entirely bad, but because it could be so much better If it wasn't written in the 80s and had a different mindset attached to it. And because the way it starts and the way it progress has little to no connection to how it ends.

Because the whole thing of the Hatter sisters, all of them, was breaking social norms and expectations.

Sophie firmly believed that she would stay in the Hatter Shop for the rest of her life with the most boring existence possible — and yet she married the most chaotic, whiny and slither-outing wizard in all of Ingary, with whom everyday is a full-blown fantasy adventure.

Martha, as the youngest, was expected to have the above mentioned fantasy adventures, be a mighty witch, even a hero, maybe — but she decided to chose a happy, steady basic life with a husband and ten kids, and she didn't want to listen to anyone who said otherwise.

Lettie's arc, just as the whole stories of her sisters, were tied on what people wanted from her. She was the most beautiful out of all girls, If we believe Sophie's words, and people almost wished she would marry and find a life spouse, as she had one million proposals a day even before switching with Martha. But that wasn't what she wanted — I'm sure she would reject all of them as often as her sister did, because she wasn't a big fan of it, just as working in the bakery. Lettie wanted to be a witch, and she practically became one, switching with Martha, working with ms. Fairfax.

But while Sophie's arc of expecting to be plane and ordinary ended on being gifted and adventurous, Martha's arc of avoiding busy life ended on finding a person she loves and planning to build a big family, Lettie's arc of searching for greatest achievement and avoiding marriages ended on...a marriage.

A marriage that, as stated by herself — "Ben doesn't like people to know I'm a witch" — kinda disregards her initial want to show that she has intelligence outside of her beauty, the one that he can show and that she can use.

(This line has absolutely no context whatsoever and we can only guess why Ben wants so, because it's actually so out of his character, even all the bits that were described before. But nope, no context, no explanations. It may be because she was pregnant at the time, but, again nothing like this was ever said and it's a pretty lame excuse anyway. Magical mirrors in their house also do not obey Lettie, at all)

And, as much as I absolutely love Ben and as much as I absolutely love Lettie, I don't think pairing them was a good choice. Mostly because Lettie was seventeen (one year younger than Sophie) in the end of HMC when their "pairing" started, and Ben is described to be noticeably older that Howl in CITA, which brings us to the conclusion he's at least in his thirties. And that's...a bit uncomfortable of an age gap, especially If we take into the account they canonically had a kid about a year later. And also Ben was supposed to be her mentor.

...And If he stayed her mentor and nothing more, it would be actually great. Because I believe Lettie deserves the same development her sister had, to get was she initially wanted and what she was fighting for. To be an apprentice of the Royal Wizard, to be a powerful a well-known witch, to show the world who told her that she has to marry to succeed in life that she in fact, doesn't, to show all this guys that tried to propose to her that she didn't need them, at all. But definitely not a wife, or a mother.

Not because being a mother or/and a wife is a bad character development. It worked perfectly with Sophie, because it represents her chaotic happily ever after better than anything else, it worked with Martha because she wanted to had ten kids and marry. It's just not for Lettie's character in particular precisely because everything in her concept of "beatiful middle sister" showed that was she's supposed to be.

Because Mrs. Pentstemmon said Lettie awaits a great, good fate, that she'll be as powerful as the Witch of the Waste — and I want to see it. Because I didn't.

[galactic-rhea]

I haven't read The Queen's trilogy yet, so most of my knowledge of Sabé comes from Wookiepedia and fanfics, and I know the fandom consensus is that she and Anakin can't stand each other for Obvious Reasons, or at the very least in a "I hate my best friend's boyfriend" way, but as someone that always found the last trope kind of annoying and boring, I actually think they would bond very well while waiting at the ER.

Like they will just sit there trying to be normal while Padme gets checked by the doctors, like they are just quiet angrily looking at the wall as someone that was bitten by a radioactive tooka passes first and as a whole man-size tank of water for a mon calamari gets pushed, and then Anakin just off-handely passes Sabé a nutritive bar thing, and Sabé just passes Anakin a bottle of water because they will be hours there, then he brings caff, and then she brings him one of these books with puzzles and find space -waldo because she knows that guy absolutely has ADHD, like that's camaderie buddy.

"I told her to not try that"

"I also told her to not try that"

And they just nod because of course they did. And that's it, they bonded over bitching about "She never listens to me but I kinda into that tbh, but also it's bad for my blood pressure".

They probably would enjoy to share a space beer and talk about the most strange and random yet normal thing ever like "did you know the Crafuxeratus billis is so acid it can effectively melt away wood and enough of it some metals, so its stomach tissue has been used in armor wear" And then never share a word again for like a year.

[solarwynd]

Jimin really is the new BTS. Actually no, he's the old BTS. Jungkook is new BTS, in the sense that he's a perfect representation of everything that went wrong with BTS starting with Dynamite (and he's actually worse). But Jimin is that old BTS that made people fans in the first place. Cause no one became a fan because of the english songs. Yes, people discovered the group through those songs since they were playing everywhere, but all that did was introduce people to BTS and make them check what else they had to offer. And what they had to offer was what made people fans. If the rest of BTS's music was the same as the english trilogy people wouldn't have stuck around.

Armys have this thing where they pretend like someone liking BTS but not liking most of the members as soloists is a crazy, unfathomable thing. But as someone who likes BTS as a group and, despite being continously uninterested, continues to give the members at least a few listens whenever they released something, I can tell you that what BTS offers with their music and performances is not being offered by any other member expect Jimin. There's definitely pieces of the group in all their individual carrers, but it's either not enough or it's not the good pieces (like with Jungkook).

Cause what do people love about BTS? It's their songs, those songs that were a good balance of being people's taste (so more pop leaning or if a different genre than at least something exciting) while still being of good quality and having enough depth for fans that like thinking about and discussing the meaning of songs. It's also their performances of those songs (which, of course, first requires having those good songs), is having full intricate choreographies and a lot of energy on stage.

When you think of all of that – easy to like but not basic and shallow songs with impressive performances – then what members of the group are offering that? Go down the list, one through seven, and tell me if any other member expect for Jimin has all that? I'm not asking if any other members has something good to offer, I'm asking if they have the specific things that made fans became fans in the first place. Let's see:

Rapline: Armys aren't rap fans. Rap enjoyers? Maybe. But rap fans? No. They like rap enough to have a few verses of it every song, but not enough for it to be the whole songs, the whole album. And the attempts rapline have made with genres other than rap have somehow been even less armys's taste. Their performances are also lacking. It's fine if you wanna see someone just rap, but armys want dancing too. J-hope really could've had something here but for some reason he refuses to actually dance to his solo songs.

Jin: Now, to be fair, we haven't really seen what he has to offer as a soloist, so he could surprise me. But is he likely to? Probably not. He'll probably have an album made up of mostly ballads and no dancing.

Taehyung: His music is boring. I'm sorry, but even his fans lowkey don't care about it. Also, they can scream all they want about him being a danceline member but I have yet to see him actually make use of that position. Taehyung's appeal is his looks and that's all.

Jungkook: Mister Dynamite himself.

Continuing with the rest of my accidently sent incomplete ask. I think I was talking about Jungkook? He's doing what BTS was doing with the english songs. That stuff is definitely popular I'll admit, but does it make for a good foundation for a whole carrer? Cause BTS could get aware with it since they already had that foundation, but Jungkook doesn't. You can't have your entire discography be Dynamites, Butters and, god forbid, PTD's. Fans are gonna get sick of it eventually. I mean armys already did after PTD, three songs in and they were ready for it to be over and for BTS to go back to how they used to be before 2020. Jungkook is currently getting away with it because it's just one solo album that gives armys the records they like while they wait for BTS (what they're actually fans of) to come back. But if he wants an actual solo carrer, he's gonna have to step up eventually. So as you can see. None of them are really offering what fans want. So why should people who became fans of BTS for those specific reasons be forced to be fans of the other members as soloists when they're not giving them what they want. I'm not a fan of people out of obligation, I'm a fan because I genuinely enjoy things. And Jimin is the only one whose solo work I genuinely enjoy. Sorry not sorry 🤷

.🎯

[stupidphototricks]

Some quotes I like from Johnny and the Dead. I'll again recommend the Johnny Maxwell trilogy for any Terry Pratchett fans, it's a bit dated, and lacks witches and wizards, and takes place on a boring spherical planet, but still there's good stuff.

And the sky above it was a glorious blue, which was pretty unusual for Blackbury, where most of the time the sky was that odd, soapy color you'd get if you lived in a Tupperware box. -- Terry Pratchett, Johnny and the Dead

"My greatest trick involved getting out of a locked sack underwater while wearing twenty feet of chain and three pairs of handcuffs." "Gosh, how often did you do that?" said Johnny. "Nearly once," said Mr. Vicenti. -- Terry Pratchett, Johnny and the Dead

Wobbler was banned from the computers because of an incident involving a library terminal, the telephone connection to the main computer, another telephone line to the computer at East Slate Air Base ten miles away, another telephone line to a much bigger computer under a mountain somewhere in America, and almost World War Three. At least that's what Wobbler said. The Assistant Information Officers said it was because he got chocolate in the keyboard. -- Terry Pratchett, Johnny and the Dead

There was a feeling, like-- --like on an airplane when it's about to land, and his ears went "pop." But it was happening with his brain, instead. -- Terry Pratchett, Johnny and the Dead

You never knew about people, like you never knew how deep a pond was because all you saw was the top. -- Terry Pratchett, Johnny and the Dead

"It's wrong to think that the past is something that's just gone. It's still there. It's just that you've gone past. If you drive through a town, it's still there in the rearview mirror. Time is a road, but it doesn't roll up behind you. Things aren't over just because they're past." -- Terry Pratchett, Johnny and the Dead

"Of all the forces in the universe, the hardest to overcome is the force of habit. Gravity is easy-peasy by comparison." -- Terry Pratchett, Johnny and the Dead

Time passes everywhere. But days and nights are little local things that happen only to people who stay in one place. If you go fast enough, you can overtake the clock... -- Terry Pratchett, Johnny and the Dead

"I believe it's very hard to have fun in Iceland without fish being involved in some way." -- Terry Pratchett, Johnny and the Dead

Making a fuss about cards and heavy metal and going on about Dungeons and Dragons stuff because it's got demon gods in it is like guarding the door when it is really coming up through the floorboards. -- Terry Pratchett, Johnny and the Dead

"Anyway, there's four of us, after all." "That just means something bad can happen four times," said Wobbler. -- Terry Pratchett, Johnny and the Dead

"Did I see them waving?" said Mrs. Liberty. "And particling, I shouldn't wonder," said the Alderman. -- Terry Pratchett, Johnny and the Dead

Johnny blinked. And looked around at the world. It was, not to put too fine a point on it, wonderful. Which wasn't the same as nice. It wasn't even the same as good. But it was full of... stuff. You'd never get to the end of it. It was always springing new things on you... -- Terry Pratchett, Johnny and the Dead

[lulu2992]

Today is the fourth anniversary of HITMAN 3, the last game in the World of Assassination trilogy!

I’ve wanted to write something about it for a while because I love it, but as much as I enjoyed playing it, taking my time exploring the levels, finding useful objects, taking notes, completing challenges, listening to conversations, following my targets, and being as stealthy as I could to reach “perfection” in each mission, what I’d like to talk about today is the scenario. Indeed, this trilogy doesn’t just have good gameplay, a nice soundtrack, and pretty visuals, it also has a great story.

My favorite thing about Hitman, at least in the most recent games (the first I played was the divisive Hitman: Absolution), also happens to be one of the main focuses of this trilogy: the relationship between the protagonist, Agent 47, and his handler (I would even say the deuteragonist), Diana Burnwood.

To me, their bond is just so special, unique, and compelling, so nearly four years after finishing HITMAN 3, I decided to write this post as an attempt to finally organize my many thoughts about it, but also and mostly, about them.

My relationship with theirs: how it started vs. how it’s going.

When I want to summarize what’s going on between Diana and 47, I usually like to describe their connection as “platonic, but more in the French acceptation of the term”... which must sound rather confusing or boring to most of you, especially if you’re a native English speaker, but I’m not, so let me explain what it means to me.

I must digress for a moment here but, the first few times I saw people use the term “platonic” in English to talk about friends or even family, I was quite confused. In French, if we say a relationship is “platonique”, there’s only a small chance that what we mean is, “They’re just friends” and a much higher probability that what we’re actually saying is, “They’re having a soulmates-level of romance so deep and spiritual that carnality is completely unnecessary” instead. I’d find it weird to use that word to describe relationships that are inherently not sexual; it mostly refers to a “special” kind of romance in French.

And this is what Diana and 47’s relationship is to me: something powerful and unconventional that I don’t think can reasonably be described as definitely romantic but that simultaneously manages to be, somehow, the ultimate form of romance.

So, as a fan of this unusual and seemingly unbreakable bond, playing through the entire trilogy was a delight. There were a few scenes in the first two games that made me smile like an idiot (such as this one), but in HITMAN 3 in particular, there were even more moments to enjoy.

I was pleased to see 47 get a bit upset when he realized Lucas didn’t fully trust Diana and to hear him affirm she would make things right because “she always does”, felt vindicated when she told Edwards he was “delusional” if he thought she could betray 47, was touched when Olivia said she understood why he wanted to “protect her”, then both surprised by the bluntness and happy with the assertiveness of 47’s “You don’t know her” after she questioned Diana’s allegiance, and I even pretty much turned into that “excited Kermit” reaction GIF when Diana explained she was 47’s only weakness even though that was exactly what I expected her to say.

Finally, in Mendoza, the most exciting mission for me despite its worrying name (“The Farewell”), I loved their conversation at the beginning, was glad to hear that he was right about her true intentions and loyalty all along, and much like he clearly was, caught off guard when she touched his hand. In the rest of the level, I enjoyed following her around and found their banter and synergy quite delightful, especially at the end. Then, of course, there was also the tango.

But when the “Necessary Evil” cutscene happened, I was… upset. Well, the first time I saw it, at least, because there is so, so much more depth and beauty to this scene than I initially realized, as concerned as part of me was that yet another franchise I love had forgotten its own lore and was collapsing in on itself before my eyes, ripping away from me what I loved most about it. Thankfully, that was not what was happening.

Looking at what I know of their history, I was and still am very much confident that Diana and 47 would rather turn against the rest of the world (and do it together) than be disloyal to each other, so even though I kept telling myself that her betrayal was fake and she had a plan, I was disappointed to see that, contrary to what I thought, they weren’t past the point of pretending to deceive and/or kill each other as a way to fool and bring down powerful people and organizations. She “killed” him in Blood Money, he “killed” her in Absolution; they were even. She most likely thought things had to happen this way to truly work, but I hoped they were done keeping secrets from one another. I’m still sad she had to trick him, and even more so that, even for just a moment, he genuinely thought she was serious and that he had lost her too.

In the toxin-induced and introspective hallucination that follows, 47 faces his worst fears... and some happen to be Diana deriding, belittling, and abandoning him. This was painful to watch because those are distressing thoughts for him, but to be honest, I also liked seeing just how much she meant to him. When he watches her dancing with Edwards, I couldn’t help but think of that scene in Polarized, the fifth episode of Life is Strange, in which Max, also drugged, has a nightmare and sees her “special friend” Chloe criticizing and replacing her. Fortunately, 47 quickly reconsiders the situation, talking some sense into himself with the help of “Lucas”. The other voice in his mind, Diana’s, encourages him to trust his intuition, and so he finally understands what he has to do.

Although she partly left him in the dark about her strategy and there are certain things she didn’t say, rewatching “Necessary Evil” made me appreciate how much Diana did say and how significant all of that was. Indeed, despite the apparent disingenuity of her act, the context suggesting, at first glance, that she’s either backstabbing him or purely playing a character, and the rather contemptuous tone she made sure to use to fool her audience, it’s since become apparent to me that she meant every single word she said.

She makes it sound like she’s turning against him and doesn’t want to see him anymore, but what she’s actually saying is that he, like everyone else, should be free to forge his own path. Even though she meant no harm and believed it was what he needed when she recruited him, she felt she used him, that he was only a tool, a weapon she controlled, and it was not right. He didn’t object when she chose him as her agent 20 years earlier, but had he not lost his memory and been truly able to make an informed decision, what would he have chosen?

And when she says she knows it was 47 who killed her parents, which is something he (and the players) only recently discovered, although she doesn’t even blame him for it, he apologizes. He sincerely apologizes, with an unusual and palpable pain in his voice. He’s genuinely sorry for what happened (so much so that he thinks that’s reason enough for her to want him dead), and maybe also for not having had the courage to tell her the horrifying truth. She deserved to know, but maybe out of shame, because he didn’t want her to suffer or for their relationship to be affected, he chose not to say anything. Had she known the full story sooner, though, what would she have chosen?

Diana’s last words before she leaves and he loses consciousness are, “This is a kindness. Goodbye... agent”. “Goodbye”, not “farewell”. “Agent”, not “47”. This is the end of the partnership she realized she imposed on him, but whether or not it’s also the end of the friendship they nonetheless built along the way is up to him. She’s been the one making most of the choices this whole time, and now it’s his turn. Calling what she’s just done a “kindness” isn’t a lie or emotional manipulation; it’s a fact. In their “own special way”, they care about each other, deeply and earnestly, but both of them also made selfish decisions they convinced themselves were in the other’s best interest. In that scene, they’re finally facing their past(s) and accepting the truth, freeing themselves and each other in the process.

“Necessary Evil” was initially worrying to watch, but what it shows isn’t the brutal and grim end of a 20-year partnership; it’s a moment of pure honesty, maybe even the most heart-to-heart conversation Diana and 47 have ever had. After this “last tango”, she sets him free, allowing him to live the life he wants. At last.

Although, again, I would have preferred her to do things differently and spare him that suffering, I also absolutely love the fact she didn’t even need to reveal her full plan for him to figure out what it was and carry it out exactly the way she expected him to. I suppose it’s not that surprising since he’s already demonstrated many times in many ways that he knows her better than anyone else does (and vice versa, probably), but it’s still fascinating. They don’t need words to communicate anymore, yet the few they exchanged before leaving Mendoza were salutary. A necessary evil, indeed.

In the last scene of the game, one year later, 47 recontacts Diana and informs her of his decision to go back to doing his former job, but this time by choice and on his own terms. “It’s good to be back”, he says with a smile (yes, a smile) on his face. There was one on mine too as I realized this was a callback to the very first “Announcement Trailer” for the World of Assassination trilogy. In the video, however, it was Diana who said, “Good to have you back” while he remained silent the whole time. In more than one way, the trilogy ends the way it started, but the major difference is that 47 now truly has a voice.

“I choose him”, confidently said Diana in the prologue, thus starting their productive partnership. More than 20 years later, he’s back in business, not because he has to but because he wants to, believing his mission is not done and wishing to continue it… but not alone. Finally free to do whatever he pleases and having had time to decide what he wanted his life to be, 47 came to a conclusion, and what he tells Diana in the epilogue, implicitly but assuredly, is, “I choose you.”

Almost six years after it was first announced, the trilogy has come full circle, and it feels like IO Interactive had it all planned out from the start. Diana and 47 are back to being partners, and by embracing their past, they can build their future on better, stronger, and healthier foundations. Now, more than ever, it’s them together against the rest of the world. As a fan of their duo, as well as nicely wrapped-up and carefully written stories in general, I don’t know if I could have dreamt of a more satisfying ending.

Perfectly executed.

[nerdthatsiriuslylovesteaxx]

Never leave me

Nico heard a soft knock at his door, he glanced down at his watch, 11:27, no reasonable person would be here, alas Will Solace never did have a habit of being reasonable.

"Neeks, we're having a Star Wars marathon, right now, I bought snacks." He laughed to himself as he went to open the door.

"What happened to getting a reasonable amount of sleep Solace?"

"You weren't sleeping either way and you need to watch Star Wars."

"Oh gods, this can't be good..." Will ruffled his hair and kissed him on the forehead, "Wait, how the fuck did you get here without getting murdered by harpies?"

"I may or may not have bribed them; also language." He said in a teasing manor while they walked into the Hades cabin,

"What's so amazing about this series anyways? Isn't it just a bunch of guys fighting in space with glowing swords?"

"How dare you, this is the most incredible thing you will ever see in your life, trust me."

"See that's impossible, Harry Potter exists."

"Why the fuck have you watched Harry Potter but not Star Wars?"

"Who needs to be 'languaged' now?"

"Oh shush, I just found out my boyfriend is uncultured."

"Oh shut up you little nerd."

"Little is strong coming from you, and can I just remind you how long you spent talking about Mythomagic last night?"

"At least that's actually useful, unlike glowing space sticks."

"Harry Potter...? Literally just rip off Star Wars."

"How!?"

"You'll see." He started the movie on his laptop, placing it on a small wooden table along with the all the snacks he bought. "You'll love it."

"We'll see William, we'll see." He sat down next to him, lying his head on his chest, Will wrapped his arm around him, holding him close.

***

"This is so boring."

"Shut up, the starts a bit slow, it gets good at the forty minutes mark."

"I'll believe it when I see it."

***

"Mid, at best."

"You do realise there's eight more of those." After that realisation Nico started aggressively throwing popcorn at him, leading to them pausing the movie and having a mini popcorn fight, ending with Will's surrender solely because he wanted to finish the movie.

***

"HE'S HIS DAD? WHAT THE ACTU-" He put his hand of the Ghost King's mouth,

"Shhhhhh, people are trying to sleep."

"I don't give a fuck Solace, what the fuck was that?"

***

"Neeks, that's the end of the original trilogy." He waited for a few seconds before realising the son of Hades had fallen asleep in his arms, carefully he picked him up, making sure to not wake him as he layed him in his bed and slipping in next to him. "Goodnight Angel, I love you." He whispered, pressing a kiss to his forehead before falling asleep next to him, hugging him as they both slept.

________

@midnightisday2 happy birthday, here's some fluff, just for you :)

Also happy pride moth everyone <3

You're all loved and I will hunt down anyone who has made you think otherwise

[archduchessofnowhere]

We talk about portrayals of Sisi, but I think that Franz Joseph was, if anything, even more misrepresented by the recent period dramas. How would you rank the portrayals of him you have seen/read (in historical novels)? Is there any piece of historical fiction that actually captures his character accurately?

Hello! YES I always focus on Elisabeth but he is also completely butchered in all these new series. I think I've said it before, but basically it's very hard to reconcile who FJ actually was (both as an emperor and as a person) with him being a love interest we as an audience can root for. Specially in these new adaptations in which Elisabeth is outspoken, mature and actively politically involved in the events of the empire (and not just the Compromise). Why would our Girl Boss protagonist want to be with a man who was bureaucracy made flesh, very conservative, and just kinda boring in general? It doesn't work. Thus, his personality also gets rewritten.

I don't really have a decided ranking, but off the top of my head I'd say these are my least to most favorite portrayals:

Sisi & Ich (2023): Do you hate Sisi adaptations that turn FJ into a horrible, abusive husband in order to make his wife look good? Well, this portrayal does just that. He is only very briefly in the movie but I hated every minute of it, personally I was mostly fine with the movie despite all its inaccuracies but there was one scene from this part that was a deal breaker for me. This movie should've been just two hours of Irma and Elisabeth traveling and nothing else.

Die Kaiserin (2022-): The solution of the screenwriters to the problem of "how do we make FJ likeable?" Basically turning him into his brother Maximilian lol. You see, he has liberal ideas but his evil mother doesn't let him pursue them! Oh, and he had nothing to do with those executions, that was also his mother! In fact everything bad he ever did was all his mother's fault, because he is not even governing, his mother is. By season 2 it almost seems that FJ has absolutely no idea what's going on in his own empire and needs to be explained basic thing like Italian nationalism. This series sanitizes FJ in levels that just aren't seen in any other adaptation, not even the Sissi Trilogy. You are watching the show and can't help but think "who is this guy???". The only thing he has in common with the real FJ is that he loves his wife, but the way their relationship is portrayed is so unlike the real couple that not even that makes him similar to his historical counterpart.

Sisi (2021-2024). This FJ is in the opposite end of the same spectrum as Die Kaiserin's FJ. Season 1 had the original take of not making FJ likeable, but instead they turned him in a borderline cartoonishly evil, violent and smug man. He smiles as he orders executions, he beats his aids for not reason, he openly cheats on his wife and publicly insults her in a fit of jealousy. Honestly I was baffled by this take, because even after all these bizarre changes they still went for a "Sisi and Franz's great love story!" approach for the series. Which was. A choice. They obviously wanted to make him like that so that he could go through a redemption arc thanks to his relationship with Sisi, but it was just not a well written arc, and when his personality does change in later seasons it doesn't feel like earned character grow but simply that the writers decided to tone down their original approach.

Yet I will admit I'm lowkey fond of this portrayal, I liked most of his storyline in season 2 (he spends most of the season bonding with a feral child and also definitely has a thing going on with Andrássy you can't convince me otherwise), and in season 3 I found myself agreeing with him. So yeah, utterly butchered FJ but in an entertaining way at least.

Sissi Trilogy: I'm honestly overall indifferent to this FJ; he is basically the blueprint for every posterior depiction that portrays him as a Prince Charming love interest. Yet, for all the overomantization of Elisabeth's early life, the movies don't shy away from telling us how FJ was directly responsible of the counter revolution executions. We even see how he is still hated in Hungary and Italy (at least until Sissi comes into the scene). A certain show from a certain straming service could learn that it's not necessary to completely sanitize his image and pin all his faults onto his mother to make Franz Josef into a palatable love interest.

Sisi (2009). I feel about this FJ almost the same as I feel about the Sissi Trilogy's FJ, but in this portrayal we do see more of him than just "Sisi's love interest". Also it's not always all the color of roses, he and Elisabeth disagree and fight more than once. His relationship with his brother Max is also really interesting, pity they only interact in like three scenes. Overall a solid take, if a bit romanticized and not particularly remarkable.

Kronprinz Rudolf (2006). Not a bad take but for what I remember they portrayed Taaffe as having this great influence over FJ and putting him against Rudolf. And like no the evil minister was not responsible for FJ distrusting his son He Was Like That.

Elisabeth das Musical: the only depiction on this list that I truly like, and it really proves that the only way to have a good FJ is to not make him into a love interest. He is only a supporting character and yet the musical nails the most important bits of his personality and his relationship with Elisabeth outstandingly well (loved his wife but never understood her, cheated yet still longed for her, let her go but always hoped she would comeback next to him). There's even room to also show his relationship with Rudolfl! The only thing that I don't really like is that they do portray his mother as having a lot of influence over him, but that's mostly because the musical has an outdated take on Sophie (which works pretty well in a storytelling level nonetheless!). Boote in der Nacht is the saddest song in the entire musical, and the musical is not even about FJ and Elisabeth as a couple. Just a great, nuanced and engaging take!

I know I'm missing a lot FJs but these are the ones that came to my mind right now; I don't think I've ever seen Franz Josef in a piece of media that isn't about Elisabeth or Rudolf. Thank you for your question!

[txttletale]

(Other than the really weird bit about "Male presenting Doctor") what were your thoughts about the specials?

pretty mixed bag, pretty messy, but good overall. i think they were very obviously a nostalgia trip for people around my age lol and it worked! i loved seeing tennant and tate back onscreen together, their chemistry hasn't aged a bit, and honestly just watching doctor who that wasn't written by chris chibnall was a breath of fresh air. they weren't boring, like seasons 11 and 12 were, and they didn't go too far off the other end into nonsense like flux did. characters want things again! the show can let itself just be silly! i was literally cheering out loud when donna and the doctor were just saying random scifi gobbledegook at each other for like a solid several minutes during the star beast.

the structure of the specials kind of baffles me. i love wild blue yonder--i think it's definitively the best of the specials as a standalone, it's absolutely fantastic, creepy and atmospheric and bringing things around to RTD's strength, which is well-written characters interacting with each other and letting good actors just act. but at the same time i dont understand why it exists? it feels like...idk. imagine if you watched the star wars original trilogy but instead of the empire strikes back the middle film was just a feature length film about luke and han surviving on an ice planet with no reference to anything that happens in the last film except the two characters' relationship. and then the next film was still return of the jedi, unchanged. it felt like that

i liked all the weird campy silliness of the star beast and the giggle, and they were both very fun! neil patrick harris gave a fantastic performance, there are a lot of very memorable sequences from the giggle, but it's very very all over the place. so many threads get kind of picked up and go nowhere. the toymaker's haunted house dimension goes nowhere. RTD's eyerolling social media commetnary goes nowhere (thank god tbh but yknow im illustrating something here). even the toymaker kind of goes nowhere, after ncuti gatwa shows up he's bascially an afterthought who loses by dropping a ball. obvious parallels to david tennant's first episode with that ball scene could be made, but just... aren't. it feels like load-bearing sectikons of the plot and themes were cut out to make room for a backdoor pilot for the stupid fucking UNIT spinoff

oh and it goes without saying i fucking hate all the UNIT wank in the star beast and the giggle. i hope space nine eleven 2 happens to their stupid fucking avengers tower i cannot stand kate stewart who is constantly a murderous bonehead (in the giggle alone she gets two pepole killed by not listening to the doctor and assuming that this teleporting godlike entity could be restrainted by Two Guys) who is both in and out of universe just a boring nepo baby with no merit of her own

um. i still dont know what happened with the regeneration. i think the implication is that when david tennant dies hell time travel back to become ncuti gatwa inside himself--at least the rehab dialogue seems to make that implication. but it's not really explained or explored? baffling. i do think that fourteen getting to settle down and live a peaceful life with his friends is cute.

oh yeah and the ask said other than that but goddd there was some good stuff in the star beast and honestly with the state of the UK media i will take any perspective on trans people that includes baseline human erespect but some of those lines made me cringe so bad. anyway overall i am cautiously optimistic for the future of the show--oh ncuti was fucking great did i mention that i instantly bnought him as the doctor he owned the scene, the moment he was there it was clear he was the protagonist, and i liked the church on ruby road well enough too--i am cautiously optimistic but i worry that a big UNIT-shaped tumor will devour huge chunks of it and it'll be annoying. also russel t davies is like 60 and i just dont want to hear what he has to say about twitter so im not looking forward to dot and bubble

[biblicallyaccuratemoth]

I hope it hasn’t already been asked too many times, but since I generally like a lot of kaiju movies, I’d like your opinions/recommendations on Godzilla movies:

-Favorite Godzilla movie

-Least favorite (or most hated) Godzilla movie

-Godzilla movie you feel is most under appreciated

Feel free to elaborate on why if you’d like :)

I will ALWAYS take an opportunity to talk about Godzilla.

It's difficult to narrow myself down to a single favorite, so I'm going to cheat a little here and break it down by era. I'm also going to count the original 1954 film as its own thing, so I can rank the Showa movies without it taking the win pretty much automatically.

FAVORITE GODZILLA FILM FROM 1954:

The original Gojira (1954). This film is the trendsetter for the Kaiju genre as a whole and laid the foundation for everything to come. Still, it's so tonally different from the Showa era that followed it, that I want to just list it as its own entity. It's somber, poignant, and shockingly brutal for the time. I love this film. FAVORITE SHOWA GODZILLA FILM:

I'll have to give this to Ghidorah: The Three-Headed Monster (1964). It was a difficult call between this, and Mothra vs Godzilla (1964), but my love of Ghidorah is so long-lasting that I have to give this film the edge. It's goofy, Showa-era fun involving aliens possessing a foreign princess, the introduction of Rodan into the larger Godzilla series, and of course the introduction of Ghidorah. I am never bored watching this movie. FAVORITE HEISEI GODZILLA FILM:

This goes to the single best swan song a Godzilla era has ever received, Godzilla vs Destroyah (1995). This film may even be my favorite Godzilla film, given all the wonderful inspiration from Aliens, amazing work with monsters and miniatures, and a genuinely unforgettable conclusion. The Heisei era is probably the most consistent in terms of quality, and this was an amazing high note to end on. FAVORITE MILLENIUM GODZILLA FILM:

This is an easy win for Godzilla, Mothra, King Ghidorah: Giant Monsters All-Out Attack (2001). Often referred to as 'GMK' for short, this is one of the best Godzilla films, period. Shūsuke Kaneko, hot off the immaculate Gamera trilogy, makes one of the single scariest interpretations of Godzilla ever conceived. This film is really bold for going out of it's way to show destruction and death at the hands of Godzilla. Also, shoutout to Baragon! Baragon is one of my favorite Kaiju ever, he's adorable and I sort of want to pet him. FAVORITE REIWA GODZILLA FILM:

This is difficult because Reiwa has had two of the best Godzilla films ever: Shin Godzilla (2016), and Godzilla: Minus One (2022). While I love them both, I think I'll have to give this to Minus One. Reinventing Godzilla as a metaphor for post-traumatic stress and survivor's guilt was a brilliant stroke, and this film probably has the single most affecting human plot in the Godzilla series. Also, Godzilla looks and feels perfect here. Every step he takes is absolutely incredible, and the Ginza attack is one of the best scenes in the Godzilla series.

HONORABLE MENTION:

I have to give some shoutouts here! Firstly, I want to lend an affectionate eye towards Godzilla 2000 (1999), which was my first ever Godzilla film! It's fun, a little campy, and has a really great finale.

Secondly, I want to give a shoutout to a series of films that aren't Godzilla films technically but carry the Showa spirit into the Heisei era. I will always have love in my heart for the Rebirth of Mothra Trilogy (1996, 1997, 1998). Until King of the Monsters (2019), Rebirth of Mothra III has the best portrayal of King Ghidorah, hands down. He's brutal, sadistic, and gets absolutely annihilated in a spectacular finale. Rebirth of Mothra II was one of my favorites growing up, my twin and I watched that film over and over again.

My least favorite is a little tricky because I do love every Godzilla film. But if I had to single a few out as being less cooked than the others, I'd be inclined to point the finger at...

LEAST FAVORITE GODZILLA FILM:

Godzilla vs Gigan (1972). I'll just say it. I'm not a big Gigan fan. He looks kind of dumb to me, and even his later designs never really do it for me. Combine that with a film that has constant stock footage and a truly embarrassing shot of Ghidorah flying around, totally motionless, and you get my least favorite film in the series. I know it's traditional to list All Monsters Attack (1969), but at least that film tries something new. And even if that new thing failed, it's still an admirable attempt.

As far as an underappreciated film, there's one that I think gets a bad reputation for some shoddy effects in the last act. The issue with a series as big as the Godzilla series is that sometimes, amidst the peaks and valleys, some lovely content gets lost in the middle when the overall film is more on the lukewarm side.

MOST UNDERAPPRECIATED GODZILLA FILM:

Godzilla vs Megaguirus (2000.) I love this film! The final fight definitely had some cut corners from the budget, but I have to adore it still for its connections to the original Rodan (1956), and some really strong horror elements in its first act. Plus, I like bugs. Can't fault me for that.

Thanks for the ask! I always love talking about Godzilla.

[velvees-archive]

save for the dual destinies dlc case, i’ve finished my first play through of the mainline ace attorney games. incredibly solid series. i have a draft with my thoughts on each case in the aj trilogy + game ratings. dunno if i’d wanna post it though, it’s kinda long.

so instead, i’ll post some misc thoughts about phoenix and edgeworth portrayals across mainline/aai + my personal favorite interpretations of them by the writing team!

spoilers for AA mainline and AAI duology

by far, my favorite phoenix portrayal is og trilogy phoenix. the way he interacts with his environment and the people around him is very authentic, albeit rude as hell (which, in hindsight, is even more authentic for phoenix, so…). saw someone’s tumblr post mention that phoenix is such a “straight guy” which…yeah LMAO. real to life accuracy, so much so it’s infuriating. i think what i’ve played of dd’s dlc case captures what i wanted to see from post-trilogy phoenix in that he’s still an asshole and comically stupid, but not actually stupid, if ykwim. something i disliked abt the rest of aa5 and aa6 is how the writing team watered his character down to the following two oversimplifications: “phoenix only wins cases bc he bluffs!” and “uhh...what evidence does phoenix present now?”

don’t mistake a silly man for a stupid man. mia calls phoenix a genius in the og trilogy. phoenix dives in head first but he’s meticulous when it comes to drawing out the truth. most of all, he doesn’t outwardly show how frazzled he is (see that one drew misham quote about phoenix quietly watching the court as he’s accused of forging evidence), even if he feels that way. i get the colorful usage of expressions is for comedic effect but it just makes him look like he doesn’t know wtf he’s doing, and that’s a disservice to his character. yes, he bluffs, but he isn’t clueless. anyway, i’m excited to replay the first trilogy now that i “know” second trilogy phoenix. that might also just be my way of saying “give me back MY phoenix”, bc the last time i’m (mostly) on board w his portrayal is in aa4, and even then i didn’t like the dialogue in his forged evidence trial.

*though, as of writing this, i’ve seen some good arguments abt his forged evidence trial dialogue that make me think ok maybe it was actually pretty accurate. let’s see wht i think on replay

on the other hand, my favorite edgeworth—at least in principle—is post-apollo justice edgeworth. in many ways, i think how he’s portrayed at 35 is how he would’ve been had dl-6 not occurred, barring his career choice. still a bit pompous, still fairly mean (at least on the surface, we all know he cares more than he lets on) and perhaps a bit uptight, but self-assured and just. the writing team makes a point to show that edgeworth doesn’t care about prestige or fancy titles. that feels like him in a way post-first trilogy edgeworth doesn’t. this particular point was fleshed out in aa1 and rfta, tho, so idk if i can give yamazaki credit for it.

there are some things that will always bother me abt post-first trilogy edgeworth (the problems are present in the aai duology as well) where the writing team shoves him into a box teeming with boring tropes for his character archetype.

an example:

creds for both these pictures: me

edgeworth is fine w pictures in the first trilogy, but comes to hate them in the aai duology.

ik it’s small but honestly what was the reason? what justification is there for this outside of wanting to fit edgeworth into a “cold character” stereotype?

bridge to the turnabout and turnabout ablaze are only about a month apart. i’m not buying into the sudden aversion to picture taking, regardless how minute a criticism it is. in any case, i feel like what i’m trying to say comes through w these screenshots: yamazaki’s edgeworth is always just a little off.

i am forgetting where i saw the post and i have too many liked posts to scroll thru to find it again but i saw a reblog?? tumblr post?? abt yamazaki and takumi’s diff approaches to edgeworth, where takumi says edgeworth listens to trot while yamazaki thinks he’d listen to classical music, and if that doesn’t drive the point home, idk wht will.

why then, did i enjoy post-aj edgeworth most? short answer is i’m taking liberties w his development and its implications. while i never completely buy into post-aa3 edgeworth, i can digest and get behind most of him when i’m not nitpicking, unlike w post-aj phoenix. does edgeworth feel a little uninspired and one- as opposed to three-dimensional? yeah, but his core is so strong i can overlook it. i’ll miss seeing a developed edgeworth when replaying the trilogy. him at 35 makes me feel warm inside.

anyway, i didn’t intend to start hating when i made this post bc i ultimately still believe the second trilogy was pretty good, if not overly ambitious with it's storytelling. maybe i'll post that AJ trilogy review.

overall, tho, t&t and aai2 were my favorite games to come out of the franchise. i’m going to do that slow replay of the first trilogy, aai duology, and aj:aa before making final judgments.

[bigcats-birds-and-books]

Books of 2024: October Wrap-Up.

Gr8 news: I am no longer very far behind on my NaNo prep reading!! I had to drop JUST LIKE HOME (reread) and HOUSE OF LEAVES, but I got through the rest of my Haunted House and/or Aliens and/or Parasite/Fungus TBR. Here they all are!

Photos and/or reviews linked:

SHRIEK - ★★★★ I think SHRIEK Is my favorite volume of the Ambergris trilogy, taken as a whole--the one-way conversation Duncan was having with Janice was a really neat narrative choice, and then the reveal in the Afterword's Afterword was, in true VanderMeer fashion, mind-blowing.

FINCH - ★★★★ I was actually surprised by how much I liked this one. It helped me figure out a LOT about what kinds of power dynamics I enjoy in borderline-dystopian fiction, and what intrigues me most about limited agency. It wrapped the story up almost too neatly, for a VanderMeer, but I did still have a good time and blitzed through it quickly. Given this one and SHRIEK, I'm counting the Whole Series as a Four-Star read--I'd like to reread it someday, now that I know what's going on.

LEECH - ★★★★★ (reread) STILL ONE OF MY ALL-TIME FAVES, OFFICIALLY!! It's very gothic and heavy and fucked up, but it does FASCINATING things with POV, and worldbuilding, and storytelling frameworks. PLEASE check the content warnings, but if none of those are hard no's for you, definitely pick this one up. I suspect anyone for whom Animorphs was a Formative Influence will adore this (but so far my sample size is really only 1)--please prove me right.

A HOUSE WITH GOOD BONES - ★★★½ This was fun! Not my favorite Kingfisher (that award still goes to HOLLOW PLACES), but I had a good time--I laughed, I squealed over vultures, I blasted through pages to get to the end.

STARLING HOUSE - ★★★★ Alix E. Harrow always manages to write exactly my catnip, somehow. Maybe it's the ADHD, but I'm constantly finding connections to my own writing projects in her work, and STARLING HOUSE was no exception! I liked that this one was more modern, and the sibling dynamic was precious, and I love weird sentient houses where space is more of a suggestion than a hard and fast rule. I'll probably reread this one for Driscoll purposes!

WOODWORM - ★★★½ So much rage in such a tiny volume, and I was Absolutely Here For It. I don't tend to read much lit fic, but I do try to read a lot in translation, and I thought this one did very cool stuff with Spanish--the prose felt natural in English, but I loved the linguistic details the translators left in Spanish and how much depth that added. I feel like this one might be a good fit for Carmen Maria Machado fans, too.

HOW TO SELL A HAUNTED HOUSE - ★★★ Call this a low 3, from me. It was Fine, I guess. I liked what he did with the act structure (labeling parts as stages of grief was very cool), and I liked the family dynamics and history, but a lot of the humor didn't land for me (I got a few sensible chuckles, but a bunch of it wasn't funny), and the "oh this author is A Man, huh" moments made me roll my eyes (seriously: Who thinks about their ~breasts~ when an angry taxidermied squirrel is clawing down your shirt?? No One With Breasts, Mr. Dude). This book did at least teach me that I'm not really interested in gore (it's just boring, unlike body horror, my beloved). I might still pick up HORRORSTOR, but I probably won't look into most of his other stuff, if this one is indicative of his general style. Meh.

THE ART OF EXCESS - No rating (didn't read the whole thing). At the end of ALWAYS COMING HOME, Richard Powers mentioned this book as the reason he finally committed to ALWAYS, so I was curious what this Tom Leclair dude had to say about it back in 1989. I had a heck of a time tracking down a copy (it's very out of print, and my local library had to source it from the Library of Congress for me), but I didn't want to buy it to read just the preface/intro/epilogue, because I haven't read any of the other texts he analyzes. Leclair's style was very readable, and I was intrigued by his framework, but I found some of his conclusions eye-rolly, given his sample size. I posted this one because I think Library of Congress books are fun, but I didn't add it to my Goodreads.

BLACK TIDE - ★★★½ This one had me rolling my eyes in the first couple chapters, and I was afraid I wasn't going to like it, but once Fucked Up Shit Started Happening, the momentum really picked up and didn't stop--I blitzed through it way past my bedtime on a school night. It was fucked up and weird and tense and bloody pull-no-punches horror, but it ALSO made me laugh, and I loved our two fuck-ups surviving the apocalypse together. NOTE: Dogs (and Gulls) Are Not Safe, and the cast is small enough that it matters a lot :( if you can't stomach animal harm/death, skip this.

A HALF-BUILT GARDEN - 81/338 pages read; will report back. Enjoying it so far! Glad I put it on my NaNo prep reading list, though not quite for the reasons I planned--the reflections on motherhood as well as parenting outside the binary have been interesting, so far (and that's relevant for my own haunted house endeavors!). A much gentler ride than BLACK TIDE, and the immersive tech reminds me of Murderbot's world, just Earthbound.

Overall! Fabulous month for reading! Anytime I think "wow I need A Break™ from writing or life," this is the type of reading I mean--where I can spend a couple weeks annihilating books within a day to Refill the Words Reservoir.

Under the Cut: A Note About ~*★Stars★*~

Historically, I have been Very Bad™ about assigning things Star Ratings, because it's so Vibes Heavy for me and therefore Contingent Upon my Whims. I am refining this as I figure out my wrap up posts (epiphany of last month: I don't like that stars are Odd, because that makes three the midpoint and things are rarely so truly mid for me)(I have hacked my way around this with a ½). Here is, generally, how I conceptualize stars:

★ - This was Bad. I would actively recommend that you do NOT read this one, no redeeming qualities whatsoever, not worth the slog. Save Yourself, It's Too Late For Me. Book goes in the garbage (donate bin).

★★ - This was Not Good. I would not recommend it, but it wasn't a total waste or wash--something in here held my interest/kept my attention/sparked some joy. I will not be rereading this ever. Save Yourself (Or Join Me In Suffering, That Seems Like A Cool Bonding Activity).

★★★ - This was Good/Fine/Okay/Meh. I don't care about this enough to recommend it one way or another. Perfectly serviceable book, held my interest, I probably enjoyed myself (or at least didn't actively loathe the reading). I don't have especially strong feelings. You probably don't need to save yourself from this one--if it sounds like your jam, give it a shot! Just didn't resonate with me particularly powerfully. I probably won't reread this unless I'm after something in particular.

★★★½ - I liked this! I'll probably recommend it if I know it matches someone's vibes or specific requests, but I didn't commit to a star rating on Goodreads. More likely to reread, but not guaranteed.

★★★★ - I really enjoyed this!! I would recommend it (sometimes with caveats about content warnings or such--I tend to like weird fucked up funny shit, and I don't have many hard readerly NO's). Not a perfect book for me by any means, but Very Good. This is something I would reread! Join me!!

★★★★★ - I LOVED THE SHIT OUT OF THIS, IT REWIRED MY BRAIN, WILL RECOMMEND TO ANYONE AND EVERYONE AT THE SLIGHTEST PROVOCATION (content warning caveats still apply--see 4-star disclaimer). Excellent book, I'll reread it regularly, I'll buy copies for all my friends, I'll try to convince all of Booklr to read it, PLEASE join me!!