#but have you ever tried to fill water with them?

[lightsiided]

     rey sighs, trying not to fidget further as she watches thor put love to bed. with her hands empty, there's nothing to distract her; she feels the squirming of her stomach intensify.

it's clear by the way thor looks at her, once the baby is settled, that he knows what's on her mind. slowly, she makes her way over to the edge of the bed. rey can't help but to wonder if he's DISAPPOINTED she's dwelling on what's happened, still.

she sits beside him, hardly knowing what to say. fortunately, she doesn't have to come up with something right away -- thor takes care of that for her, too. rey spreads her fingers out over his chest, eyes trained on her palm. she can feel the beat of his heart beneath his skin, still warm and damp from the shower.

for a long few moments, she focuses only on breathing, matching the rise and fall of her chest to his. it DOESN'T help. not really. the look in his eyes is a stark reminder of what nearly happened -- he'd looked at her just like this, then. "i know," rey mumbles. her voice wavers around the words; no amount of clearing her throat is enough to dispel the lump that forms in the back of it. despite her best efforts, she can feel her eyes fill with tears.

"i know," she repeats, "i just --" mindful of the sleeping infant behind them, rey cuts off with a quiet sob. tears slide down either side of her face, though she lifts her free hand to quickly wipe them away. thor is RIGHT, after all. the threat is gone. his wish was made, and thor remains here with her. though it's not much of a comfort when she considers how close they came to the opposite outcome. "i just can't lose you," rey whispers. her eyes sweep greedily over his face until she leans in closer -- close enough their foreheads can touch.

"i don't know what i would do if... it was just really terrible. that's all." she can so easily recall the PANIC that had gripped her; it still lurks in the back of her mind. but rey tries to emphasize what thor has said: no one is coming to get him. there is no reason they should ever have to be apart again.

more than that... soon they'll be married. they will spend FOREVER at each other's side.

rey sniffs, rubbing her eyes. "i'll feel better after a hot shower." the words are said unconvincingly, but at least she'll be in bed with thor after it's over. it's that thought that encourages her enough to stand, though she remains close to him for another moment, reluctantly to pull her hands from his chest. it almost feels as though if she lets thor out of her sight, he will DISAPPEAR.

"i love you. i'll be right back." her feet feel leaden, but they move. rey drags herself across the small space that leads to the washroom, leaving the door open so she can hear of anything that might be amiss while she peels her clothes off. of course there's NOTHING, but that doesn't help much, either. though the force sends her no warnings, rey still worries something awful might happen at any moment.

she steps into the shower, letting the hot water soak her hair, her face. it washes her tears away and the dirt of the battle. the dried blood from the scratch thunderbolt had left behind goes down the drain with it, and she looks at the faint pink line that runs across her arm with disinterest. it feels like a lifetime ago that they begged the gods for help. for all the GOOD that had done.

she makes quick work of the soap and shampoo, eager to be in the same room with thor again. there is an audible exhale of relief when she stops in the bedroom, turning to the mirror to braid her hair.

he leaves them with a small smile, his now free hand petting at rey’s hair before he disappears from the bedroom.  the house around them is quiet — dark and still — as he reaches into the shower to turn the water on.  with a flash, he is freed of his armor, and thor steps beneath the hot, running water with a sigh.  a breath that feels held for too long.

beneath the stream, lathering soap along his skin and through his hair, he thinks nothing of the time that’s passing while he’s in there.  the day comes back to him in pieces; the shadow monsters, the abduction of the children, jane wielding mjolnir, the golden temple, the shadow realm.  moments he will hold close to his heart as long as memory will allow, and others he almost wishes he could forget.  there is a bittersweet ache in his chest.  he and rey are to be wed.  it’s the singular happiest thought he can imagine.  but she was almost taken from him today, and he from her.  jane is still dead.  telling her friends will be his responsibility…

it is a while before he finally cuts off the water and steps out to dry himself.  wrapping his towel around his waist, still-damp hair clings to his shoulders and back when he at last emerges from the steaming bathroom.  thor’s mouth is opening to speak, but rey stops him in his tracks.

his face stills.  he nods in compliance, reaching once again for love.  very carefully does he extract her from rey’s arms to hold her against his chest; in her state at the very edge of sleep, she stirs, her eyelids barely opening, but she doesn’t fully awake.  “alright,” thor says quietly, rubbing at the baby’s back as he carries her across the room.  to the bassinet that will now be hers.  “you can take a minute.”

rey looks worried.  it may not even be noticeable to anyone other than him, at a quick glance.  that she was smiling with him in the kitchen, dreaming of their future children just moments ago, it seems, makes the contrast all the more stark.  but thor focuses first on lulling the baby to sleep.  when her breathing has slowed, thor attempts a whispered, “are you asleep, little one?”

no recognition, no reaction at all.  love is asleep.  slowly, he lowers her into her bassinet, holding his breath as he unwinds from her.  when they are freed of one another, and she still doesn’t wake, thor turns to regard rey quietly.  pressing his lips together, he tightens his towel, sits at the edge of the bed.  farther away from where love sleeps, closer to the warmth of the bathroom.

“come.  sit.”  maintaining his hushed tone, thor holds a hand out to rey.  he pulls her down to sit beside him, first — then brings that hand to his chest.  “there, you can feel my heart beating beneath your palm.  does that help?”

the hand not holding hers falls to her back, offering the same, slow, circular rubs that had soothed love into unconsciousness.  featherlight is the trail of his fingertips, his gaze trained steadily on her face.

outside, she had said — she doesn’t want them to be apart.

“gorr is dead.”  quiet as his voice is, its firm.  not to scold, not to belittle; to convince.  to reaffirm.  “we watched him take his last breaths.  the wish… it has been granted.  it sleeps soundly just behind us.  nothing threatens our happiness now.  nothing is coming to pull us apart.  you… haven’t had a moment to process that, i suppose.  you can now.  it’s just the two of us.”

[frostsinth]

Your Heart's Got Teeth - Pt. 6

Part 1|2|3|4|5 - Masterlist

Here, have another part of this enemies to lovers-esque story. Come off the cliff hanger I left from the last update.

Thoughts and impressions appreciated. My thoughts? These two are idiots and I love them. Also, this is not close to done. So enjoyyy.

Language and innuendo warning. Viewer discretion is advised.

----

“You pompous, arrogant, son of a-”

SNNAAAP!!!

I gasped as suddenly the air was forced out of me by the freezing waters and the sound of the storm was muffled by the river in my ears. Before I could even think, my head dipped below the surface, and I sucked down a mouthful of the icy liquid. Then my feet hit the bottom, and half on instinct alone I pushed off. Bouncing back towards the surface. But I was waterlogged, heavier than when I had fallen in. Even with the momentum, I barely crested the surface. Trying desperately to get my face out. Flailing and kicking. Still not sure if I was up or down but feeling the hint of cold wind over the top of my wet hair before I dropped back below the surface.

As suddenly as I had fallen in, I felt the suck of the water around me as I was yanked back out. Gasping as soon as the icy wind hit me square. Struggling to breathe. My chest clenching tight and preventing real air from flowing back into my lungs from the shock of it. Solid ground hit my knees, my hands. But I couldn’t fully feel them, couldn’t lock them in to hold my weight. And so I flopped to the ground. Gaping like a fish and instantly shivering so hard my bones rattled in my frame. Blackness dotted the edges of my vision, and I groped and wriggled slowly. As if I could claw my way out of the icy grip the winter had me in. Something around my waist, pulling my face from the snow. Then a heavy force hit my back with a thump. Once, then twice. At the third strike, my diaphragm kicked back to life. Spasming and leaving me painfully coughing. Gagging up the water that had found its way to my lungs.

Another shocking gasp as I left the ground again. Hoisted up, then smacked against something firm (though softer than the ground). The wind was a bit lessened in this new position, but I couldn’t feel anything other than that. I tried to wiggle my fingers, tried to draw in another breath. I struggled with both, my body just refusing to obey.

“Hold on!!” Came a familiar voice over the raging wind.

I tried to make sense of it all. Tried to remember what was happening. Where my hands were, my legs, my head. Trying to remember who I was. Where we had been. I knew dimly that I had fallen into the river. I knew that someone was carrying me now through the storm. But where could we go?? I had to get out of the storm. I had to get warm, and fast. Or I wouldn’t be remembering anything else ever again.

An echoing laugh danced in my ears. A memory, so long past I had almost forgotten it. I reached, clawing, tugging.

“C-Cave!” I gasped as loud as my stricken throat could manage. “E-Ea-sst-sst!”

I thought I heard a growl, or a grumble. Maybe I felt it in my cheek. I felt my head swirl, felt darkness quickly circling my vision. Felt myself grow heavier, and at the same time, felt nothing at all.

My ears rang with the sudden silence when the wind cut out, and I managed to find enough semblance of myself to shiver. Quake really, from head to toe. As if a rattle being shaken enthusiastically by every child who would ever think to shake it all at once. Then I was falling, but there was no crash at the end. Something hard and cold, and I ran my fingers over it. Stone? I was on my side now, I thought, and a clatter had me trying to look about.

A soft snap and hiss. Orange red light. Filling the void of my vision. Having me blinking rapidly. Shaking my head, though no one would notice since my entire body was in spasms of cold.

“Here. Quick.”

I felt tugging. Pulling. Fingers? Hands maybe. I was too numb to tell. Like ice sheets dragging across my skin. The crunch of something crashing into stone. Something new around me? No… wait, yes? Distinctly floating, then not again. Wrapped up, tingling numbness. Wet, maybe warm? Warmer. Still quaking, still shivering. That was good. Good to shiver. Meant my body was reacting to the cold. It was so cold, it burned. I almost cried for the pain of it. Twisting, trying to find my hands. My limbs. The burning singe at the tips of my fingers, the edges of my skin. Felt like they weren’t there at all. Then realizing my eyes were almost frozen shut. Forcing them open.

A dark beard, two long, thin braids trailing from it. A thick green neck that flashed as he breathed. Copper yellow eyes. Piercing and sharp. Staring down at me. A furrowed brow, thick lashes. Huge teeth, a wide mouth. I blinked stupidly, trying to figure out why it was so close. He shifted, and my nose was tucked against that green neck. Against the warm skin. It was warm. I could almost feel the warmth now. Even amid my lack of feeling, I could tell it was different than my cold.

“Listen, you little bitch,” Came the soft, rumbling growl, “You’d better not freeze to death on me. Or so help me I will kill you.”

I would’ve scoffed, if I had more presence of mind. My lips were still numb, but my teeth were clacking together now. I thought I might bite my tongue if I tried to speak.

“I-i-id-d-dio-ot-t.” I chattered.

It was worth the risk.

Arms around me tightened. He shifted the furs, shifted closer to the fire. “Keep talking.” He said softly. “Keep talking, vile woman.”

I felt my eyes start to close, felt my breath become shallow. I nearly gasped as he shook me, my head flopping about painfully.

“No. Don’t sleep. Don’t you dare.” He growled. “Talk to me.” He stymied another attempt to close my eyes with another little shake. “Talk to me!”

“F-f-fff-uck-k oo-o-ooff-ff-ff.” I stammered through clattering teeth.

A rumble of approval. “Better. At least you can follow directions.”

I felt my fingers curl into a fist. As if I might punch him. Punch that smug look off his face I was sure he had. I couldn’t find the strength to do more than that.

“O-oh, y-yy-yo-oou…” I tried, then sneezed. “… B-b-b-b-”

“You brilliant creature?” He offered. “Beloved chief? Beguiling rogue?”

“B-b-bbb-bas-tt-tard-d.”

He scoffed, shifting me again, pulling another stick over to the fire. “Sorry, didn’t quite catch that.”

I tried to shove at him. Sneezing again instead. His thick, powerful arms barely let me shift an inch.

“B-b-b-bas… Bas- b-b-b.”

“Becalming.” He suggested. “Bright. Brilliant. Beautiful?”

“Ba-Bass… B-b-bast..tard…”

A chuckle now. “Whatever motivates you. Stay awake.”

I blinked slowly, still shivering. My toes and fingers remained numb, but other parts of my body tingling painfully as if hundreds of needles were pricking them. I tried to look around, but felt his grip tighten. As if I might try to climb out of the warm cocoon he had me wrapped in. I scoffed quietly, letting my head drop back amid the furs wrapped around me. Feeling my breath shudder and shake as it spilled down his bare chest.

“… W-whe… w-w-where…?” I mumbled, shaking and trying to wiggle my fingers and toes.

“Cave.” He reminded me, and one of his hands came around to begin rubbing firmly at my feet. “Already had wood stacked in here… yours?”

I managed a small nod. Trying to pull my thoughts together better. He rumbled again, giving me a little squeeze. He passed me something, and when it fumbled from my hands he brought it to my lips instead. The warm liquid felt good on my throat, and I almost sighed when he finally lowered it.

“Not enough wood for the night. Not to keep it warm enough to melt your frozen heart.” He explained. “But enough to get you thawed out a bit.”

“C-c-Cold.” I managed.

Another dry chuckle. “Obviously. Taking a bath in the frozen river in the middle of a massive blizzard will do that.”

I managed to thump my fist weakly against his chest. “Y-y-you-ou… b-b-bas-bastard-dd.” I accused.

He grunted. “Sorry, can’t hate me until you can function properly again.”

His other palm was at my back now. Rubbing between the shoulder blades. Over my neck. Firmly rolling down my back. I felt my eyes droop at the pleasantness of his firm fingers. I gasped again as he shook me.

“No sleeping.” He ordered.

“F-ff-ffuck…” I tried, then sighed tiredly. My fingers slowly uncurling. Resting my cold palm flat against his chest. I felt goosebumps raise under my touch. He offered me another drink of the warm water, and I drank it obediently before settling back into his arms.

I lost track of how long we sat there in silence. His hands rubbing up and down my chilled skin. My fingers, my shoulders. My toes and arms. I blinked, trying to keep myself awake. Trying to make complete sense of what was happening. My mind swirling uselessly, my body shivering with cold and exhaustion. Another little sneeze escaped me, and I shifted a little against him.

“… Still awake?” He asked finally, his voice uncharacteristically soft.

I managed a tiny nod and a petering, affirmative sound.

“Good.” I felt him shift around me, and managed to look up in time to see him craning his neck towards the cave entrance. “We’re stuck here at least for the night.” He told me. “I’ll need to get more wood.”

“T-treessss.” I mumbled.

“What?”

“Y-y-you g-ge-get w-wood-d fr-f-from t-treesss.” I stuttered through shivering lips. “C-ca-case yo-you-you’ve n-n-never h-ha-had t-t-to b-b-bother be-before.”

He shook his big head, beads chiming in his braids as he did. “You’re a dead woman.” He grumbled.

“A-an-n-n ax w-worksss b-b-bes-”

“Oh, shut up.” He cut me off. “Even half frozen you’re still a bitch.”

I almost smiled, but wasn’t quite sure I had the muscle strength to do so yet. Still, I was starting to feel warmer. Starting to feel as though my body might obey me if I tried. I turned my face towards his warmth. Sighing again instead. Breathing in his musky scent. Feeling my heart skip a bit as his arms encompassed me. He was so warm, and despite his firm muscles and biting words, he held me very gently. Like a doll made of glass. I wondered suddenly what it would be like to wake up in these arms. Which brought stirring to the surface the memory of the last time we had been alone together. The taste of his warm mouth against mine, the press of our bodies…

Almost as cold as the icy river, I felt guilt slowly wrapping its fingers around me at the memory. Which made his once gentle touch burn as if he had dropped me in the hot coals instead. I shifted in his arms, starting to pull back clumsily. I felt his body tighten around me.

“P-p-put m-m-me-me d-d-d-”

“I didn’t drag you through a blizzard just for you to freeze to death in a cave.” He snapped before I could stammer it out. “Hold still.”

I shoved at him weakly, wondering how my elbows didn’t break from the attempt in their current weakened state.

“I-I-I ss-ssaid, p-p-put m-m-me d-down.” The order was weakened by my chattering teeth. But I shook my head stubbornly.

He wrapped his arms further around me. “Even if it’ll keep you alive, you still can’t stand the idea of an orc touching you.” His voice was quiet and dark, somehow filling the room as effectively as a choking smoke.

“I-I c-c-c-an’t… ” I tried to push away from him again.

I gave an unglamorous ‘Omphh!’ as he suddenly dumped me from his lap. Standing up and glaring down at me. His hands balled into fists, his teeth bared.

“Fine then. FINE! Freeze to death. See if I care!” He tossed his hands up, turning and grabbing his big battle ax before stomping out the cave entrance.

I stared after him for a long time, and shivered in the silence. Torn between my own shame of letting him touch me and now the growing guilt of his fresh disdain. The cave felt colder with his absence. Despite the fact that his huge body was no longer filling the tiny space, I felt like the walls had shrunk. Like it would all collapse on me at any minute. I sniffled, blinking back the anxiousness that settled like a shroud over me. Trying to push back the emotions that threatened to suffocate me, shifting a bit closer to the fire he had built in the center of the cave. Hearing the distant drip of water from somewhere amid the crackle of the flames. I noticed some jerky put to warm by the fire, and took a small piece to chew. Even the little bites sapped my energy reserves, and I felt myself droop as I waited for the warm food to hit my stomach. Shivering again.

I reached out from his big cloak which he had left around me, pulling out one of the last smaller logs and shakily placing it on the fire. The movement had a draft of cold sweeping across my skin, and I quickly re-bundled myself even as I quaked on the stone. Which made me realize… I had no clothes.

I glanced down quickly as if to confirm the fact. Then wrapped up his cloak even tighter around me and feeling what could pass for a hot flush in my current state rising to my cheeks. That whole time? That whole time, he had been rubbing his big, meaty hands up and down my naked body? Had me pressed directly to his bare chest?

I almost groaned, my throat suddenly burning. Feeling like I would have cried if I’d had the fluids left to do so. If I could be sure they wouldn’t break like ice at the corners of my eyes.

The Gods were punishing me. I shouldn’t have survived. It would have been better if he had just let me sink to the bottom of the river. This was worse somehow, knowing I’d let him… And even now, I was wrapped up in his cloak. It stank of him, and I felt my nose rub against the fur a little as I drew in a deep breath of it. Shivering, and not just from the cold. I shifted a little closer to the fire, feeling guilty for even that.

I tried to think of something else. Looking around the little cave. I felt a flood of memories come to the surface of my cloudy thoughts. The sound of my brother’s laughter. His smile. I felt my guilt turn to sorrow, which only doubled the ache in my heart. This was one of many of the caves that had been our hideouts. Adequately stocked for our excursions, packed to near bursting with memories. My brother had never been the strongest of constitutions. Often he would wait in one of these caves while I hunted nearby… I hadn’t been back to any of them since he had passed…

I wasn’t sure how long I sat there, wallowing in my guilt and sorrow. Watching the fire crackle. Half wishing I could just let it burn down to nothing. Just sink into darkness, and let myself fall asleep. My eyes did feel heavy, and a few times I felt them close. But the howl of the wind or the distant snap of a branch would waken me. And I stared at the entrance instead. Pulling the fur up over my damp hair. Rubbing at my fingers and toes. Wondering if Jou’kiel had decided to leave me here. Wondering if he was going to let the elements do what he had always wanted… Wondering if it would be worth the burns to pull some of the coals in and hold them against myself. Just to feel some real warmth again.

Finally, his lumbering steps announced his return. Dragging a small tree behind him and shaking the snow off his broad, bare shoulders. Reminding me I was currently wrapped in his cloak. Leaving him completely exposed to the storm’s biting winds. But I swear I could see steam rising off his body, and wasn’t sure it was all melting snow dripping down his huge, muscled back.

He glanced at me as he came in, as if unable to resist. Looking away as soon as he saw my eyes were open. Then brought the tree in as deep as he could. It filled the space, and deftly he began trimming down the branches. Filling the room with the scent of pine and sap. He moved down its length, then took his big ax and cracked it into the trunk itself. Careful not to pierce all the way through and damage his weapon on the stone floor. It was a battle ax, so not the most efficient thing for cutting up the wood. But it did more than well enough, and soon he had a new pile of wood sitting beside the old. Starting to dry out in the smoke of the fire.

“Given the blizzard, I’ll suffer you a little longer.” He told me haughtily, plopping down on the stone floor almost on the opposite side of the fire. Tossing a fresh log and rubbing at his arms as it sparked to life. “Soon as it breaks, you can get the fuck out.”

I didn’t answer, staring at the crackling flames. Watching them lick over the new log, snapping and creeping up its length. The fire and its warmth growing to fill the cave again. I blinked slowly, still shivering, and wondering if I just closed my eyes, if I’d be able to shut it all out. At least for a few hours. I rubbed at my runny nose with the back of my hand.

I saw him glance at me, then give a huff. Shaking his damp braids.

“… Considering how much you apparently hate us, you sure have a knack for saving orcs.” He grumbled angrily. I peeked at him, and he made a point to look away.

I didn’t answer, sitting and shivering. Staring at the fire. I saw him sneak another piercing glance at me. Then a low growl formed in his throat. He pulled some more jerky from the pack and set it beside the fire to dry out and warm up.

“What, too good to speak to me now?” He demanded in an angry hiss.

“… I d-didn’t save ann-nyone.” I assured him after a long pause, my tones soft and bitter.

He dragged one of the branches over, slowly snapping the twigs off one at a time absentmindedly and tossing them into the fire.

“You saved Izu.” He ticked off one finger, still sounding angry, then tossed a stick to the flames.

“I-I just let hhhim go.”

Another scoff. “Hear him tell it, you fought off a horde to aid his escape.” He stared down at the latest stick in his big hands, twirling it deftly. “… And you saved me.”

I jerked a bit, looking up at him in surprise. His dark scowl flicked to me, then back to the stick. He tossed it into the flames with the others after a moment.

“… I broke the ice.” He told me quietly. “It was my weight that caused it to break. If I had fallen in, you would never have been able to pull me out. But you irritating, horrible little thing that you are… you shoved me out of the way.”

I huffed a bit, pulling his cloak tighter around myself and shaking my head a little. “D-d-don’t give mm-me that c-credit.”

His scowl deepened. “Gods forbid anyone discovered you saved not one, but two orcs.” He snarled. “You might just die of the shame.”

I closed my eyes, squeezing them shut. “… Y-you sh-should hhhave left m-me.” I mumbled.

He rolled his eyes, twisting and yanking the next stick off the branch. “I owe you a debt now too.” He grumbled. “I fucking told you I didn’t want to owe you anything.”

“Y-You don’t.”

“You don’t get to decide that.” He snapped again, copper yellow eyes darting up to fix me with a glare. “And even if you hate orcs, even if you might slit my throat, I will honor that debt.”

I felt my own brow furrow. I rubbed the back of one hand at my nose and shook my head.

“I th-thought yoou didn’t m-make promises.” I mumbled bitterly.

He scoffed, snapping a particularly large twig with a resounding CRACK. Tossing it into the fire to have the flames leap and lick at it eagerly.

“I don’t. That’s not a promise.”

I ran my thumb up and down the furs. Still staring into the fire’s center. Shivering a little, with a deep chill that felt like it was set in my bones already.

“Y-you’re an i-iddiot.” I told him around my mostly numb lips.

He bared his teeth at me. “Maybe I am. Getting caught up in you.” He tore his gaze away, looking around. “Getting stuck in this cave. I should have gone back with Izu. Made sure he was safe. Should have dragged you back like… ” He glared back down at the branch. Snapping off a few sticks angrily. “I should have just killed you the first time I saw you… And kissing you? That was my worst mistake. A stupid, stupid mistake.”

I wasn’t sure why that bothered me as much as it did. I felt a fresh guilt claw at my throat, making it burn. I blinked back icy tears, shivering and wondering again if the burns might be worth it. If I could sit in the center of a pyre, just so that I could feel warmer. Could feel anything. It was as if the chill in my skin sought to sink to my heart.

“… Ssorr-” I stopped my apology short, then huffed a little angrily. Looking down at the ground. “… I-it can’t hh-happen again.”

He snarled, shoving the branch off to the side angrily. “You frigid bitch. How dare you? How DARE you think you can order me around??” He slid closer so that he could jab a finger at my cold shoulder through his cloak wrapped around it. “You are the hostage here. No matter what Izu might think,” I winced a bit at the reminder, and his scowl deepened. “You will do as I say.”

I shot him a sour look, half buried in his cloak. “J-just leave me al-lone.” I mumbled bitterly.

He leaned across the gap between us, leering over me. “I’d love nothing more. But now…” He stopped, then adjusted his mouth, scowling again. “… Now I can’t. No matter how much you want me dead.”

I shifted, avoiding his eyes.

“… I d-don’t want you dead.” I told him quietly, then winced guiltily.

Another scoff. “Sure. You only insult and threaten the people you like.” His free hand went up to rub at his neck, where just a few hours previously my blade had been pressed. “Gods above, what did an orc ever do to you to make you hate us so.”

“Ass-side from d-decimating the village that r-raised me?” I said, half under my breath. A bit of ire rising in me at his jabs.

“You hated us long before we stepped foot here.”

“I don’t hh-hate-”

“Don’t lie to me, Calliope!” He snarled, his breath hot in my ear he was so close. I flinched, and he jabbed his finger at me again. “There! You can’t even bare to be near me. Can’t even…” He growled, a deep rumbling in his chest that filled the air around us, and I jumped as his huge hand suddenly grabbed my chin. Forcing me towards him. “Just look at me, damn it!”

My ire fully sparked and burned, and I shoved his hand away. Glaring at him. Matching his scowl with my own.

“You don’t know me!” I snapped. “You don’t know an-anything about me! You sss-spoiled, arrogant-”

He grabbed my chin again, a little more firmly this time. Bringing himself even closer. His copper eyes as hot as the coals in the fire beside us.

“You kissed me back.” He reminded me, and I brought both hands up to try to tear myself from his grasp without avail. “For a minute, just one solitary fucking minute, you didn’t hate me. Now you’re repulsed by me, even more than before. And I find myself trying to figure out what made me kiss you in the first place. How I could crave such a bitter little hateful bitch so much that I thought I wanted to fuck her.”

“Let me go!” I cried, twisting in his grasp, the cloak slipping down my shoulders a bit as I did.

“Why??” He growled. “Does my touch burn? Does it bother you that I wanted to fuck you? That was until I realized what a raging, odious bitch you really were.”

“You dumb, m-mindless oaf!” I snapped again, punching at his arm weakly. “How can you be so f-fucking thick hh-headed!”

“No better than a monster, right? Isn’t that what you think of orcs?” He asked angrily, his tone crackling hot with his rage, his volume raising to be thunderous in the cave around us. “No better than fucking a mindless beast. Do I really disgust you so??”

“I DISGUST MYSELF!” I shouted back at him.

A final shove amid his surprise and he released me at last. Dropping his hand away and staring at me. I gasped, collapsing a bit and wrapping my arms around myself. Shaking again, and not from the cold. My eyes felt hot, my throat burned. The echo of our shouting seeming to bounce about the stone walls in our sudden silence.

“… For wanting me.” He reasoned after a few quiet moments, his deep baritone a barely discernible rumble at its current soft volume.

“You ssself-centered bastard,” I scoffed, “It’s not about you! It was n-never…”

I stopped short, then shook my head viciously. Trying to take back the confession even as it welled up inside me. I turned away, pulling the cloak as far up around myself as I could without disappearing into it entirely.

“I-I…”

Another rumble from somewhere deep in his chest as I dropped off. “… Don’t tell me you’ve lost your nerve now.” He pressed. “What else am I supposed to think? How could it not be-”

“It’s my f-fault.” I whispered, shivering again.

He stopped short, staring at me. “… What’s your fault?”

“You are.” I squeezed my eyes shut. “Being here. All those… Everyone’s dead…” I gushed. My voice shook, and I swallowed hard, trying to steady myself. “Because of me. Because I let Izu’lemi go. Because…” I choked, shaking my head again. Burying my face in the furs as I shook with the weight of my guilt. “You should have let me d-drown. O-or freeze… You should have buried me…” A single tear escaped my defenses. “I deserve it.”

There was a long, drawn out silence. I hid my face, refusing to look at him. Drawing in one deep, agonized breath after deep, agonized breath.

“… Izu didn’t tell us about your village.”

My head snapped up, and I looked at him with wide, red rimmed eyes.

“What??”

He shook his head. “Izu didn’t tell us. One of the soldiers did.” He grunted, shifting a little to cross his legs and almost absentmindedly put another log on the fire. “Some bastard who tried to sell his own people for a little coin. Izu actually tried to stop the order to attack.” He didn’t look at me, poking at the fire with a long stick until it crackled back to life. “So if that's what all this is about, you’ve been beating yourself up over nothing.” A smirk started playing across his lips. “And you have the nerve to call me an-”

He gave a shout of surprise as I whacked him across his shoulders. Looking over at me with his previously abandoned branch clutched between my hands. Tears still in the corners of my eyes. I brandished the branch again, scowling at him.

“You bastard!” I snapped. “You self-indulgent pig! You didn’t ever think to-”

Now it was my turn to shout as he snatched at the branch even as I swung it to hit him again. A firm yank, and I came toppling forward. Stubbornly refusing to release my hold. Resisting weakly as he pulled me even closer. He had my arm now, and twisted it so that I dropped the branch. Bringing us perilously close together.

“Don’t push me, woman,” He snarled in my face, his nose almost brushing mine, “I can still bury you!”

I brought my free hand out and smacked him soundly across his cheek. “So much for your debt!” I shot back as I did. “You stupid, arrogant, son of a -”

He gave a quiet roar. Lunging at me. Knocking me on my back and pinning me there. The cloak half twisted around me. I wriggled beneath him for a moment, and he shoved his big head back in my face. Crouched over me on all fours.

“You irritating! Frigid! Stubborn-” He started, his voice as thunderous as his brow.

Then we froze, almost as one. I felt his hot breath against my face. Saw his copper eyes smolder, his jaw shift. I swallowed a lump in my throat, closing my mouth after realizing I had left it gaping. Panting a bit from my exertion as he hoovered over me. Half of my cold skin exposed before him, which sent goosebumps racing down my bare flesh. Staring at each other.

I felt suddenly weightless, as if his hands were the only thing keeping me from floating away. Felt my heart pump with the most ease it had in months. Felt the heat burning in me like a rushing river where once there had been a dam. I wasn’t sure I could stand it. I was certain I would drown beneath the waves of heat. Though I couldn’t tell if it was anger or desire, and my breath fluttered in my throat.

Based upon the intensity in his copper eyes, I knew he could sense the change in me. I watched his nostrils flare, saw his fat tongue come out to lick his thick lips. We both shifted, nearly at the same time. As if a string were tied between our bodies, lashing us together. The heat between us growing tenfold in the spans of a breath.

My head cracked back against the stone with the force of his kiss. I fed him the gasp, and he dropped his huge body over mine. Only the strength of his massive arms keeping him from crushing me completely. My own arms came up instantly. Wrapping around his neck. Pulling him deeper into me. He gave a deep, pleased chuff somewhere inside him that rippled directly against my skin pressed to his chest. His mouth was hot, almost feverish, in pursuit of mine. His tusks crashing against my face, his braids a curtain around us. Burying me in his scent, which had me shivering almost as much as his hot body half writhing against my own. I brought one leg up, wrapping it as far as I could around his hips, which had him growling against my lips.

He pulled back just enough to trace his mouth along my jaw, down my neck. Burying his face there for a moment until his thick tongue worked out a soft sound of pleasure from my own lips.

“You bastard.” I breathed, running my hands over his huge shoulders. Over his arms. Touching every part of his body I could reach.

He came back to my mouth a moment later. Smashing us back together. I traced my tongue out and found it met his in the middle. Hot and feverish, desperately in need to taste and press and roll around each others. He shifted slightly, sliding one arm along the ground so that he could bring his hand to my face. Pushing my hair back, tracing down to my neck, Wrapping his fingers there and resting his thumb upon my throat as I swallowed.

All of a sudden, he drew back, and I looked up at him in surprise. My breath coming in shallow pants. A smirk twisted his lips.

“I thought we can’t let this happen anymore?” He reminded me, his breath husky.

“Oh, shut up, you pompous-” I hissed.

I had more insults lined up. But he forced them back into my mouth with his. Though I realized it was not as feverish, not as rough. He slowly lowered his body beside mine. Shuffling to pull the cloak a little further around me. As his kisses slowed, I pulled back a bit, still breathless and weak.

“You need to rest.” He grumbled, and I thought he sounded a bit bitter despite himself. “Can’t fuck you silly if you’re still half frozen.”

I almost shivered at the suggestion, bringing my hands out to his broad chest. Feeling it rumble in amusement as I did. Then he fully settled himself beside me, neatly cupping me between his body and the fire. He stretched and curled, reaching up one massive arm to draw a few logs closer. Tossing one lazily onto the fire. Then his hungry eyes returned to me, and I saw them drift down my body.

“… Your tits are showing.”

I thumped a fist into him. Turning as if to roll back up fully into his cloak. I heard a low growl, and his arm snaked out. Wrapping around my middle and pulling me into his chest. Tucking me against him and shuffling to pull the cloak over us both. Well, partially, at least. I was certain I was far more covered than he was.

“You’re an ass.” I mumbled, shifting against him and finding his body so pleasantly warm I couldn’t help but melt into him.

“And you have a nice ass.” He returned, taking up a palm full of it beneath the makeshift blanket. I slapped the offending hand and he drew in a sharp breath before laughing lightly. The sound making my heart skip. He buried his face in my hair. “I look forward to making it bounce.”

I shoved my elbow into his ribs. “Don’t even think about it.” I said, my voice weak with my exhaustion but still bitter. “I’ll smack you raw.”

“Promise?” He purred in my ear, nibbling at it.

“Get off.” I grumbled, but without much force behind it I merely felt him chuckle around me.

He did relent after a moment, sighing heavily and wrapping me up in his arms. Resting his chin on the top of my head. I settled against him, not thinking too hard about how bare and exposed I was, tucked against his hot skin. I felt warmer now, with only the barest lingering pins and needles at my distant extremities. Which had the exhaustion of the whole ordeal catching up with me. I felt my eyes growing heavier, no matter how intensely I stared at the crackling flames.

“… As easy as that?” He asked me quietly, then I heard the smirk form on his lips. “You like me now?”

“Not in the least.” I grumbled tiredly. “You’re still a stupid, pompous-”

His hand came up, cupping over my mouth. Smothering the last of my insults into his palm. I wriggled weakly against him, and his lips kissed my jaw, then nibbled at my ear. I managed to rip my mouth free as he distracted himself tasting my chilled flesh.

“Don’t get any ideas in your head that we’re friends.” I mumbled half-heartedly. “I still haven’t decided if you piss me off or…”

He chuckled as I dropped off hesitantly, and I felt him shift. Bringing his lips down to trace along my neck, then my shoulders. I sighed, feeling myself relax even more at his touch. Feeling him press a warm kiss between my shoulder blades. Then he have a rumbling ‘hmmm’ against my skin.

“Fair enough.” He murmured against me. “Not sure I trust you won’t kill me in my sleep.”

I scoffed tiredly. “Smartest thing you’ve ever said.” I shrugged his mouth off my shoulders. “Now shut up and go to sleep.”

“Yes dear.”

His grunt as I dug my elbow into his ribs was satisfying, Then he sighed, wrapping me up a little tighter. Throwing yet another log on the fire, and settling down behind me.

To be continued....

[mak-be-ghouled]

Pits to Pack

1.2k words of Rain ghoul angst

Hurt/comfort ft. Mountain under the cut (happy ending)

Rain’s life in the pits really wasn’t too bad, in some ways it actually could be considered better than his life topside. 

For one, Rain’s body was better suited for his pit life, sure this is true with most ghouls, it's quite a challenge to fit a hell beast into a human-adjacent vessel, but water and air ghouls typically had the most trouble adjusting, and Rain was no stranger to the sometimes excruciating pain that came alongside being a water ghoul on Earth.

In the pits, Rain really was the top of the food chain, he thrived in the deepest depths the pit had to offer, but he was alone. He never really had a pack, the only memories he had in regard to a pack in the pits were ones he’d rather not relive. 

And so, Rain got used to the silence, to the security, to the protection that being alone offered him. I mean all he had to compare it to was his birth pack, and this was so much better than anything they ever had to offer, so surely Rain was thriving, wasn’t he?

When Rain is summoned however, everything gets flipped on its head. He is still alone, he doesn’t know anyone, but he’s surrounded, and somehow this is so much worse. 

Rain can't help but shrink into himself when the second largest figure in the room crouches down in front of him. An earth ghoul if his memory is serving him correct. 

The earth ghoul reaches around Rain and drapes a blanket around his shivering form. When did it get so cold?

Rain wants to flinch away, to curl into himself more, to do anything to protect himself, but he just…can't. He's so tired and so cold and everything hurts.

This earth ghoul though, he doesn't have any of the heat behind his eyes that Rain is used to seeing, his body isn't screaming at him that he's in danger, and the blanket is just so nice, and warm, and soft and-

Rain doesn’t remember much from his summoning day other than the burning pain that ran rampant through every fiber of his being.

At first Rain tries to keep his new ‘pack’ at arms length. He never had a real pack, why did he need one now? Why did he deserve one now? But most importantly, if he doesn’t let them get too close, then he can’t get hurt, right?

But somehow this gentle, loving pack manages to worm its way into his icy little heart, to fill gaps he didn’t even know were there.

And now? 

For the first time Rain is a part of a pack. A pack that he loves and a pack that loves him even more than he’ll ever really be able to comprehend. 

For the first time Rain belonged to something that wasn’t the deepest depths that water could provide. 

For the first time Rain understood what he had been missing out on in the pits, how lonely he was, how much he craved attention, craved affection, craved love. Rain had been bitten by the bug, had been intoxicated, and now there was no going back. He couldn’t imagine a life without his pack mates by his side. 

Rain is quickly and affectionately nicknamed ‘princess’, but that's only because the pack just loves spoiling their princess so much. And can you really blame them? They're just making up for lost time and making sure their princess knows the extent to which their love goes.

Sure, maybe Rain's life was “easier” in the pits, and sure it would be nice not having his vessel actively fighting against him day in and day out, but still, he’s not too sure he’d survive going back.

Not without his pack.

However, Rain is no stranger to the ministry’s history regarding water ghouls. He is all too aware of their track record. 

Water ghouls don’t last. 

They get replaced, sent back, banished, or changed. 

What makes Rain think he is any different? 

So now that tour is over, now that his time should be up judging by the previous timelines, Rain is terrified. 

There’s already going to be a new front man, what’s stopping them from replacing a subpar water ghoul too?

Before Rain even realizes what he's doing, he's isolating himself again. Maybe, subconsciously, he's trying to distance himself from the pack again, maybe he's trying to protect himself, or them, he’s really not sure. And even though Rain is doing this to himself, knows he is the only one to blame, he can't help but wish someone would join him. He knows it's not fair to ask that of them, knows he’s not going to be pleasant to be around, but fuck does he need someone.

And almost as if on command, there's a small knock at the door. Light from the hallway floods the room and disappears as quickly as it appeared. 

“Rain, baby, are you awake?” Mountain whispers as he moves towards the vaguely Rain shaped lump of bedding.

As much as Rain wants to respond, wants to reach for Mountain, to be held in those sturdy arms, the only thing his body seems to allow him to do is to pull his blanket tighter to his shaking body. 

Mountain gets a hand on Rain's shoulder and all of the fight drains from his body, he can't help but be reminded of that little water ghoul splayed out on the summoning circle all those years ago. 

“Rainy, Baby, what's goin on? We’ve been missin you today” Mountain says softly as he pulls back the blanket to reveal his water ghoul.

Rain wants to speak, he does, wants to yell at Mountain to go away, wants to beg him to stay, to hold him and to never leave him, but he just can't, can't find the words floating around in his head. 

“Can I join you, love?” Mountain asks, cupping Rain's jaw in his hand and running his thumb along his cheek. 

Rain just nods and leans heavily into Mountain's hand.

Mountain clambers into Rain’s bed, attempting to untangle the water ghoul as much as he can from the bedding so he can hold Rain close to his chest.

Rain just allows himself to be ragdolled onto Mountain’s chest.

“Its not true Princess, whatever's goin on in your head, it's not true. We love you so much, I love you so much, you're not going anywhere, ‘specially not if I have anything to say about it. 

Rain wants nothing more than to be able to say something to Mountain but he just can't get the words to come out so he just nuzzles into Mountain’s neck and hopes he’ll understand.

And of course he does, he always does.

“I love you Baby, more than the stars in the sky and the waves in the sea. Get some sleep my love, you're safe, I'm not going anywhere, I promise.” Mountain says, placing a kiss to the crown of his princess’s head.

Later, when Rain wakes up from an actually restful sleep, they'll talk about what's going on in his head, but for now both he and Mountain are content to share each other's company.

[chiipay]

HAIIIII

taking requests!? cool! ur the first person ive requested to on tumblr for a fanfic :DDD

can i request nagi, bachira, and isagi comforting, their s/o? i want the reader to have feminine traits but i want them to be gender-neutral if that makes sense-

-K :3

Uhh I live- sorry for months of not doing this- I uhh.... die and then live once again:) I'm not confident if I can represent correctly about the feminine traits but I'll try.

Also- I have no idea what the heck I am writing...

Tw: I think I accidentally made ooc Isagi- I forgot how his personality works-

Plot: gone too tired, you cried. (Me too honestly)

-- Nagi

Nagi keeps glancing at your curled up form and then proceeds to play his game on his phone- he's not heartless- he is. He's just really bad at comforting someone...well- at least that's what Reo told him. Here you are now, curling up into a ball at the corner of Nagi's apartment.

He looks back and forth from his game to your sad form of human, he's not good at comforting but it was him who's the one to commit the relationship in the first place with you. He can't leave his significant other depressing while he dazed off in his world, can't he?

He put down his phone, pausing his game which was a big sacrifice he did for you and he deserves a lot of affection for it, getting up from his comfy couch as he walks up to you, he crouches down to your height which still makes him seem taller, patting your head makes you raise your head a bit from your knees to look at him.

He looks at you, as he opens his arms widely, without a second thought, you latch your into him as if you guys could mix together in a blender, Nagi securely holds you up and walks back towards his lovely couch, picking up his pause game on his phone then proceeded to lay down with you on the couch.

Putting his head on top of yours as the silent room is now filled with gunshots that came out of Nagi's phone. ”mhmm...sorry, don't know how to help.” he pressed light kisses on top of your head while muttering a small sorry in process, your fist ruining his hoodie as you tighten your grip on him.

” you sucks at this, don't you Nagi?” leaning towards the crook of his neck, every breath you take tickles his skin to the core. ” I know.” he wiped a small shed of tears that runs down to your cheeks, ” and it's okay, because you understand.” he said flatly, his face remains in a casual look as he's not an expressive person, you couldn't tell if he's being considerate of you or not.

” I'm here, you're here. It will be fine.”

---Isagi

Isagi finds you crying in the worst situation ever, as it makes that even worse than ever when he doesn't know how to comfort you, he's so focused on football that he has no idea what to do when you cry for the first time.

” I'm fine...” you wipe your tears that keep falling out of your eyes, warm hands touching your face as Isagi pushes your own hand away and he wipes out the tears with a napkin instead.

You tried to cover your face which directly got pushed by Isagi's gentle hands that cradle your face as if it's fragile, ” there's nothing to be ashamed of.” his eyes soften when he sees you getting more embarrassed about being taken care of by the players that you supposed to be taking care of.

Kurona patted your head in comfort as he handed you his water bottle for you to drink, ” no, no tears.” you took the bottle and thanked him, then he left you two alone in an awkward silence.

” I'm sor-"

” don't be.”

” okay.”

-- bachira.

”(name)~” bachira hugs you from behind which scared the sh- out of you, you look at his cheeky face in a tired expression which he then returned with concern looks on his face.

He cupped your face in a loving way, his concern looked turned back into a big smile as he gave you a big hug, ” it's okay, I'm here.” he smiled, nuzzling into your hair, when he raised his head to see your face in expectation of your happy face, but all he got is you sobbing now with tears streaming down your cheeks like a waterfall.

” b-bachira....” you sob loudly, then you press your head deeper into his chest, crying like there's no tomorrow, ”woah! You really put an act earlier~” he giggled, he lifted you up from the ground then went to some more of a quiet room to have a talk with you.

[jimjamjimothy]

Mer au idea

Nightwing is captured by some sea fae, could be a mermaid or a water nymph, and is held in place by their giant octopus hench creature. They are enamoured by his good looks and witty charm and they want him as theirs. It doesn't matter that Nightwing is so obviously human, they must have them.

They try brokering a fae deal, "I can make your wildest dreams come true", but the vigilante is adamantly refusing, "I'd rather not sleep with the fishes, thank you," he knows not to do such a thing. Constantine has drilled it into the JL's heads to never ever ever make deals with those from underhill.

It takes one slip, a spasm in his face when he hears Red Hood arguing and cussing out at Batman and it is all it takes for the sea fae to sense a weakness, an opening. A sly grin, a gentle clawed hand tilting Nightwing's face slightly, eyes sharp and glinting.

"Don't you want those two to get along?"

"Of course I do," Nightwing agrees without delay, but it was a mistake. It's too late to take those words back and he pales underneath his mask.

They respond with a large smile with too much sharp teeth, the hand on his chin tightening to a painful degree. "Your wish is my honour to grant, Nightwing."

And they kiss him, a surge of ice rushes into him, coating his tongue and slipping down his throat, rushing into his lungs and choking him. It spreads further inwards, passing through his lungs and into his heart, filling every crevice and nook, settling heavily under his sternum and tingling all the way to his fingertips and down his spine.

"I will make it so, and in return, you will come to me, to be mine," they whispered, eyes bright like sparkling emeralds, their long serpent tail coiled tightly around him, cold fish scales scraping against his suit.

"I won't," Nightwing croaks, shaking his head.

"You will. The call of the deal will grow as time marches forward," they state, lips now brushing his ear, "I am patient. I am powerful. You will come to me."

Nightwing shivers in their grasp, the ice in his veins unpleasant. He feels his stomach drop. He can't, he can't, he can't.

He could hear them yelling at one another, attacking the other fishy hench creatures around. There was a loud explosion and several pops of a gun.

"We're having sushi tonight!"

"I prefer calamari, thank you."

"Shut up, RR!"

"My family-"

"Can do nothing to help you," they purred, nails digging in. "You may say your farewells, spend whatever time you can stand away from me with them. It will do nothing to stop the inevitable. You cannot escape."

He tries to argue again but the fae has had enough, their strong tail wrapped tightly around him, the tentacles of the giant octopus gone. All the cold, too cold, air escapes him, leaving him mute.

"I and the sea will call you and you will answer us. Your body will change, slowly, I give you this," they rumble, voice unhurried and uncaring of the growing chaos around them. "You get to properly say goodbye to your family and then..."

They kiss his throat, his cheek and then his forehead, as if he were something precious, something to be treasured. It leaves his stomach roiling.

"Nightwing! Get your hands off him, vile fiend!"

Robin-!

The fae laughs, long tail uncoiling, claws dragging across his suit. They hold him high up and Nightwing could do nothing but shiver in their grasp.

"You may have him, little child. Me and mine will take our leave."

He is thrown to the side and within moments, the fae and their underwater creatures were gone.

"Nightwing, are you alright?"

He shook. He was the farthest thing from alright.

[quintessenceofdust88]

It was really hard to choose so I'm asking for both of my favourites 🙏 please

🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊 (this one i really want to see a full fic cause it's so intriguing)

🍼🍼🍼🍼

Hi my love! Ofc you can have bothhh, no need to choose in this house hehe!

Let's start with 20-ish sentences of Tsunami goodness, continuing from here (all previous snippets here). I hope you like it! ♥

--

🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊

It’s indeed a little girl, she can’t be older than six; her light yellow summer dress is wet and covered in grime and leaves, and so is her hair which is styled in two well done pigtails; her arms are wrapped around a bright unicorn plushie. She’s looking down at him, her deep blue eyes filled with fear, a few tears running down her red cheeks. It breaks Buck’s heart. 

“Hey!” Buck says; he doesn’t see any injuries, but he won’t move her until he’s sure. “I’m gonna help you, ok? Are you hurt?”

“N-no…” She tells him with a sniffle. “But Uncle Sal is, and the water took him, and I didn’t see him anymore! And…. And I wanted to go after him, but Daddy always says I should wait for rescue if bad things happen!...”

She’s starting to cry again, and Buck  thanks the universe for whoever is the sensible parent of this child, because even if she isn’t hurt now, she would be if she had tried to get down on her own. 

“Okay, kiddo, first of all let’s get you down here safely. Then you can tell me about your uncle Sal, alright? What’s your name?” He asks her. 

“Genevieve Kinard” She recites dutifully. “But you can call me Vivie”

Buck has the faintest impression there's something familiar about that name, but he shakes it off, not having time to think about it right now. He nods at her with what he hopes is a kind smile even though exhaustion is starting to creep its way into him once again. He’s losing precious time in his search for Chris, but he can’t just abandon a little child; he knows that, if someone found Chris in the middle of all of this, he’d want them to keep him safe.

“Okay, Vivie. I'm Evan, but you can call me Buck” He tells her, and then raises his arms toward her. “Alright, Vivie, you’re gonna have to be super brave, because I'm gonna ask you to jump, and then I'll catch you. Do you think you can do that?”

It wouldn't be unreasonable for her to be scared; the situation is stressful, and the top of a pick-up must feel quite high for a little girl. But she nods without hesitation, scooching closer to the edge of the pick-up and looking down at him. 

“Kinda like playing toss?” She asks, and Buck can only assume that’s a game someone plays with her, and he hopes to God it’s similar to what he’s planning to do.

(Blobs under the cut)

And here are 16-ish sentences of Little Blobs, ch. 5, for you, continuation from here;

-🍼

“Hey, sweetie, are you ready?” Tommy asks, and Buck glares at him with the force of a thousand suns for daring to ask the question so inconsiderately. 

“Oh, that’s so easy for you to say, you have clothes that fit you!” Buck exclaims, crossing his arms, he realizes he’s being irrational, but he doesn’t care. 

Tommy, to his credit, manages not to laugh, though he still looks slightly amused by Buck’s outburst. He also doesn’t look offended, which tells Buck just how good of a husband he has.

He’s still upset and pouty when Tommy approaches him, placing a small kiss to the side of his head, and then kneeling down and pressing another one to his swollen bump, a small smile on his face.

“Hey, blobs, you’re getting too big for Daddy’s clothes in there? You’re growing so fast!” He tells them, his voice enthusiastic, but Buck notices his gaze is slightly saddened, and bites his lips, deciding now is not the moment to address it.

He’s been noticing a few moments where Tommy gets that sad, far away look in his eyes, ever since they came back from Indiana. Buck can only imagine how bad it must have felt for Tommy, seeing his father like that, and he wonders if that’s what’s still rattling him. He can’t relate that much; his relationship with his own father, while certainly not perfect, was never this antagonistic. Maybe Tommy just needs some time to brush it off.  Thinking about his father reminds Buck of the fact he still hasn’t told his parents about the babies, and he has to do it before it’s awkward. It’s not that he hasn’t meant to, but they haven’t had a video call in a long time, and they still weren’t telling people back then. He’s been meaning to schedule a new one for weeks, but things have been hectic. Maybe he’ll text them tomorrow and get it over with.

[fairfoxie]

Good question... the honest answer is, I Have No Clue. I'm just a Faery.

Ok so I have wings, and I am unsure what they look like but I think they are an iridescent white, possibly. Though as a shapeshifter they can look however I want really. I also have a big fluffy fox tail, and 2 pairs of ears; a lower elflike pair, and a higher foxlike pair. My eyes are big and bright and beady and my face is slightly beastly with sharp teeth, reminiscent of a Wendy Froud puppet. I am somewhat humanoid but I shapeshift so my form is subject to change as desired/needed.

That's complicated. I've made a post about this before, but basically, as time works differently in Faerie, and Fae don't necessarily die as we understand it, I don't really have a past life so much as an other life that is currently inaccessible to me in this body.

Yes, I work with Nature in general. And though I do feel the very real presence of other Nature spirits, clairvoyance is my weakest psychic trait. So I feel and know the presence of the Fae and even have short conversations or channeled messages from time to time, but I rarely ever see them. It happens, but weakly and briefly. I've wondered if this is somehow by design, to protect me until I'm somehow ready to truly perceive them. So if you are Faekin but can't see the Fae very well/at all you're not alone!

All The Time. Shifts come easy to me and can be either self-induced just by thinking about it, or triggered by environmental factors eg. I feel my wings when a gust of wind hits, my fox ears when a loud noise hits. My tail comes and goes as it pleases, and moments of high emotion can cause a full-body shift. I get a lot of cameo shifts being a shapeshifter, which can make questioning other kintypes confusing. I also recently have been getting dream shifts in which I can fly. Those are truly incredible experences, they feel so real, more so than the rest of the dream.

I reflected on my childhood, both my own obsession with Fairies (I tried to dig a hole to Neverland with a friend once, we didn't make it there but I found 4 leaf clovers around the hole a week later) and my fairylike traits (fun fact I have a heavy metal allergy). But it really came down to a feeling deep inside. I felt incomplete for a long time, and desperate for Nature to heal me. There was this emptiness within me, that made it impossible to ever fully accept being human. When I came across Faekin online I felt that emptiness tug at me until one day I wondered, am I a Fairy? And it felt like sunlight and warm water filling the space within me until it was undeniable. The more I read about both folklore and other Faekin, the more undeniable this aspect of myself becomes.

All I have to do is step outside and feel the Earth-energy all around me. I like to meditate outside and often I end up channelling some message from the Earth that gives me insight into my own life and philosophy. I like to wander, to sing and dance, and to observe the tiniest aspects of the natural world. I look at the way the Sun shines through water droplets and makes them flash rainbow colours into my eyes. I watch the birds flit from branch to branch, the dragonflies swoop by, the clouds tumble and dance, and I know I am just the same. I pick berries and flowers and brew fresh teas that fill me with warmth and magic. I sing nonsensical tunes with hidden wisdom that I make up as I go, a gift given freely to the wind. I hear the same words in my heart, you belong here. You are welcome here. We are the same. And if I cannot go outside, I can still sing and dance, I can create artwork and weave clothes and light candles and wear magical outfits. I can glamour myself with a touch of makeup and a drop of essential oil, and I can wear crystals of the Earth. And I know people who see the Faery in me and they bring me little affirming gifts and I feel so much love that I can survive the days I am stuck in windowless rooms surrounded by screeching metals and microplastics. I am home within myself.

Faerie Questionaire

What Mythology/Story/etc. is your Faeself from? What "kind" of Fae are you?

What are your nonhuman features like? Do you have Wings? Pointy ears? Are you short? Tall? Beastly? Beautiful?

Do you have a past life?

Do you work with any kind of Fae or Nature Spirit?

Do you get Shifts? What are they like?

How did you realize you were Faekin?

What do you do to get in touch with your Faeself?

Im going to put out questionaires from time to time to boost engagement. Lets have a conversation.

[deep-sea-anemone]

It'd be crazy if I got a new backpack...right? Totally crazy. Who cares that it's 3lbs lighter than my Deva, or that I've consolidated my gear down enough that I only need 50L of space instead of 65L...,not me, that's for sure

[brehaaorgana]

People joke about ADHD all the time, even swear up and down they totally think they also have it, but then if you ask for an accommodation, to please please please provide things in fucking writing, EXACTLY what they want and need, you will even work it out WITH them, like they promised they would do — repeatedly over and over, and then you don't get it people really will fucking be like:

I am using the incorrect bathroom (TM) to place my shelving and store my things. Homegirl literally removed various sundries and toiletries from a CLOSED CABINET and SHELF because she's interested in boundaries and accountability for my mess.

I said months ago I wanted to improve things for her comfort level and needed a written list of what precisely that fucking looked like in order to achieve it and not miss anything she deemed important. I explained how ADHD works, why I needed a written reference. Why I had to have it laid out, and if something needed changing we needed to write it all out. I would've made the list myself, but they said they would make it for the whole house to hold up their end of things. And, thinking this was a very reasonable adult solution to keeping the house in good shape, I said okay, come up with the list of expectations and what is needed and that way we can update how we handle chores. Awesome. I will do that to uphold my end.

No list ever gets made or drafted or anything despite my bringing it up, knowing we need to do it, but I DO get berated for failing to meet expectations and boundaries that were never fucking provided or delivered and include "don't store toiletries in this particular bathroom because I don't like it."

I can't believe I am a goddamn adult who gets treated like an idiot child for expecting adult communication instead of snide ass passive aggressive bullshit and basic respect for my things.

Because when I fucking get home, my shelving has been removed and a cabinet emptied of my things and placed in the "correct" bathroom.

🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃

Oh shit she solved it, this doesn't look cluttered at all!

What a vast improvement to storing things in appropriate storage!

[gibbearish]

btw similar to the whole "if you try adderall at a party and it calms you down, get an adhd test" thing, if at some point in your life you try microdosing shrooms with a friend and end up feeling like a functional person for the first time in your life, get tested for depression. like yeah hallucinogens come with elation so youre probably gonna have some "this is the best ive ever felt in my life" vibes regardless, but like. if that in and of itself feels like finally breathing in for the first time in years, thats for sure a sign that something is up with your ability to process serotonin most of the time. feeling better than ever before should be a nice bonus, not a crushing weight off your chest

[foldingfittedsheets]

Before my sister and I stopped talking she sent me a photo of an old aquarium her family had left on the porch that had filled with rain. Wild frogs had taken advantage and filled it with eggs, and the photo she sent had little tadpoles in it.

I immediately spotted a problem, but I knew my sister would hate any correction.

I tried to ask, “Have you ever had tadpoles before?”

This was not diplomatic enough, because her instant response was, “I’m not an idiot, I think I can handle watching some wild tadpoles. It can’t be hard.”

“Oh, no,” I reassured her. “I’m sure you already know about giving them branches and platforms to crawl onto to rest when their lungs develop. I was gonna tell you about how Mom learned that one the hard way when she did a tank for her classroom. All their tadpoles drowned because there were only in water. They couldn’t rest once their gills went away, it was so sad.”

She was silent a moment, contemplating her all water tank which would surely become a death trap for the little developing amphibians if she didn’t add some bridges out of the water.

“Of course I already knew that,” she lied. “We’re gonna get branches later this week.”

I said that sounded lovely and asked to see picture updates. The tadpoles thrived and later crawled free of the tank as frogs journeying out into the world.

[puff0o0]

Your eyes watered before tears left them, falling down your face and into your hands as you tried to cover them

"Schatz.. I didn't think it would make you cry-"

König said softly, his hands meeting your shoulder before pulling you into a hug and holding you tight. His hand met the back of your head as he tried holding your head and burying your face, wanting nothing more but to comfort you

"You're too sweet for me.."

You mumbled between sobs, burying your face into him

"Sweet? I only got you a gift, liebe"

König laughed, his hands rubbing your back comfortingly as you pulled back to look at everything he did for you

Balloons filled with your favorite color, 5 expensive gifts you've been wanting, and an entire letter telling you how much he loved and adored you

"It was way more than a gift!" You exclaimed, now knowing you were going to have to best him next Valentines Day

You didn't take him seriously when he said he was going to make it the best one you've ever had and that only motivated him more

You pulled away and reread the letter, not a single lie in that letter as he listed everything from your head to your personality.

He told you why he fell in love and how, he told you what only made him fall deeper in love with you as time went on, only to end it off with an 'I love you'

you started crying again

[monstas1ut]

Why you touchin’ me

military! EREN YEAGER x black!reader

Summary

__ eren just needs his girl to give it to him when he finally comes home. he’s been thinking about that super soaker every night… he always does, so of course he’s not going to let you loose or let you decide how this will go.. just keep them ankles high and he won’t be too mean.

Contains

__ black!reader, female reader, eren is in the military, DIRTY TALK, so much dirty talk, dominance, dom eren, overstimulation, squirting, talk of not pulling out, dumb off dick!reader

__ brown skin can be dark, light, medium color, whatever. brown is brown.. and it's gorgeous.

__ a/n , hey y’all lol, something slight because I’m just trying to get back into writing because I’m loosing my touch lmaooo

A simple breather couldn’t refill your lungs as the oxygen continued to be ripped from you. Those words made you lose every brain cell that was ever created in your human body. There was intensity that poured over your golden skin as your blurred eyes could only see the sparkle from his dangling chain.

“Ankles.”

Only a desperate attempt to whine could come from you. Your glossy, darkly lined lips parted only to reveal that you were drooling from the overtaking pleasure. Your hands were around your ankles, much to his liking as your head began spinning.

It was beginning to be embarrassing at how wet you were, how dumb you felt. That sweet, curved dick that slipped in each time with a smothering rhythm made you feel as if your insides were being pushed against. Your sounds, and each word that dripped from your lips, he was listening. He missed it so much that there was no way he was going to lose focus.

“Eren~ baby~… Fuck! M-My pussy so fuckin’ wet..” Those words were drenched in tears as your pussy coated Eren’s cock with warm nectar. And he enjoyed watching it pool around the base of his cock, juicy and wet. It was so gushy that his pretty eyes failed to leave it.

“I fucking see… I got that pussy talkin to me..” Eren talked to you as he pounded that hole open, his rough hands gripping hard on your pretty hips. The depths of your insides were being stretched open all over again, and you could feel it part ways with his cock.

Those army green pants he wore were now damp as they were just below his cock. He obviously couldn’t wait. Once seeing you stand there waiting for him, he had to have you the second he got home. He pulled your pretty dress off and pulled your gorgeous breasts out of your bra to worship you with kisses. But inevitably he found himself so eager to have you, he couldn’t even prepare himself for how fast he pulled his own pants and underwear down.

He just missed that pretty pussy.

It was such a soft brown, yet a bright pink on the inside, like a mystery treat. He knew how it tasted, he knew how it felt, but he still couldn’t get enough of it. He couldn’t get enough of watching your face contort into those pleasurable expressions. He couldn’t get enough of your stupid little babbles when you’d be filled up with his dick. And he surely couldn’t get enough of you soaking him like a damn water park.

With painted toes curling high in the air, you tried to keep the hard grip on your ankles. However with each thrust was a powerful force behind each one, so much that your breasts would plap against each other while falling up and down. The ripples of skin were also enough to know how strong the thrusts were, as if he was back on the battlefield trying to fight for his life. But in this case, it seemed as if Eren was fighting to make you dumb off his cock.

The head of his cock met the hot air each time, slipping right back in with your wetness lubricating the both of you well. There was absolutely no struggle to slip out and slip right back in, not when your body was producing so much lubricant. It was so wet that it felt almost numb, you couldn’t feel anything but the pleasurable pounding near your cervix. It was such a intricate, surreal feeling that there was barely any word to describe it. The only thing you could understand was that you were too close to fucking the bed sheets up,

“Ooo-…Ooh fuck! Fuck!.. No-.. shit-..” there was a sharp feeling in your stomach that felt like small jolts of orgasms. Oh it felt so odd, and it made you so anxious. Your pussy squeezed, and it had a grip on his fair skinned cock and yet he was still pounding through. It was an overwhelming feeling for your body to endure, so much so that your fingers slipped and your ankles fell from your grip.

The second this happened you had no choice but to close your legs, trying to prevent that sweet, intense orgasm you knew was coming. Fate was sealed, and the rumble that came from Eren’s throat was a warning. But for some reason, you weren’t moving fast enough for him.

“Put them fuckin’ legs back up. Grab them damn ankles.. stop playin with me..” Eren’s face was inches from yours, your eyes watering up with pleasured tears once again before grabbing a hold of your ankles. Your glistening pussy was being rammed into over and over again, and you simply couldn’t take it.

“Stop runnin from that nut.” Eren huskily whispered, obviously becoming desperate for his own orgasm. He groaned from the bottom of his stomach, his head thrown back for a second before he moved to look back down at your tightening pussy, that’s before it relaxed and he felt the sudden wetness increase. This caused him to thrust just a tad bit harder because he knew you. He still understood what made you cum, what made you cream, and what made you squirt.

“Fuck yeah… hold em’ open..” Eren almost hissed at how sexy you were, the drips of juices squirting up in the air ever so gently and landing on his cock. It all made him want to cum right there. “Eren! Eren!….Oooh~ shit~… please!” You begged, moaned, and almost felt yourself losing your body as your pussy had a mind of its own. Each time Eren would slide his dick out, you’d squirt your soft juices in the air before he’d slam right back inside you. The gushing noises made you seem like a whore for him.. in more ways than one.

“That’s fucking right.. Squirt on that dick baby.. good fucking girl..” Eren almost spoke through his teeth as his cock was sensitive, he pulled it out and grabbed his dick to run it up and down those pretty brown lips only to watch you squirm and drench the bed underneath you. The wet sounds of you splashing him was music to his ears, so he couldn’t stop.. not until you had nothing left in you.

“Please~! Fuck Eren! Stop that fucking shit…!” Your words were covered in sounds you could not contain, the pleasure was so unbelievable you couldn’t even imagine how your body was doing this. That man’s lower stomach was covered in your squirt, and his cock, which throbbed the second he went back inside.

You gripped your ankles so hard that you might leave bruises, and yet.. you couldn’t care. This man was beating your pussy up even more, overstimulating you as your eyes rolled back slowly. Your eyebrows furrowed, and you eventually stared up at him with blurred vision.

“Run from it again… I swear on me I won’t pull out..”

ⓒ Monstas1ut , Do not copy

[foxy-eva]

Warm Embrace

Summary: Spencer and his wife explore ways to be intimate with each other after a traumatic event

Pairing: Spencer Reid x Fem!Reader 

Category: Hurt/Comfort, Smut

Please read the CW, this story contains potentially triggering topics! 

Content Warnings: (18+, minors DNI) referenced past SA of Reader (non-graphic), implied flashbacks, trauma related sexual problems, conversations about sex and intimacy, nudity, kissing, mutual masturbation, handjob, thigh riding

Word count: 5.4k

Masterlist

“Spencer?” Your voice echoed through the apartment when you stepped through the door and found no sign of your husband. 

A distant sound came from the bathroom. “In here!” 

After a quiet knock on the door and his confirmation that you could step in, you found Spencer sitting in the bathtub. The room was filled with the lavender scent of the bath soap and what you could see of his body was covered in bubbles. It almost looked comical how his knees stuck out of the water, making it obvious that the tub was not big enough to accommodate his long limbs. 

“I was too tired to take a shower,” he explained after discovering your curious expression. 

“I can see that,” you laughed. “I thought you hated taking baths.”

“Honestly, I think I’m starting to understand why you like them so much. This isn't too bad.”

You stood there for a few moments, smiling at the sight in front of you. Then, as if it was the most natural thing in the world, you slowly began shedding your clothes. 

“Mind if I join you?” you wondered. 

Nothing about this situation would be unusual for any other married couple. Just a few months ago neither of you would have questioned your actions. Back then initiating any form of intimacy with each other felt natural and familiar. 

Things were different now, though. 

Spencer cleared his throat and shifted his position. “Are you sure about this?”

There was a reason to ask. For the past months any attempt to get close to each other resulted in you crying for the rest of the night. Something as simple as him placing his hand on your thigh was enough to startle you. 

A sigh rolled over your lips as you dropped your shirt to the floor. “No,” you confessed. “But I miss you.”

“I’m right here,” he reminded you.

That was not what you meant and he knew that. Of course he understood the meaning of your words. Spencer was well aware of the fact that ever since that son of a bitch hurt you, you fought a constant battle between wanting his nearness and pushing him away. 

Your husband gave you the space you needed and was there to hold you whenever you’d let him. It couldn't have been easy for him either but he never once complained about this new reality you had a live. 

A reality where that person took something from you that you’d never get back. It was hard to shake this feeling of being tainted after having your physical integrity stripped away like that. You were distant and closed off when it came to intimacy, despite your best efforts to get back to what once was normal. It had been months since Spencer even saw you unclothed.

That was about to change. 

Slowly, you pulled down your pants before reaching back to undo your bra. Spencer's sight followed the piece of clothing as it dropped to the floor before settling on your face again. 

“Stop profiling me,” you warned him with a playful undertone in your voice. 

“Sorry, I just want to make sure you’re okay.”

By pulling down your panties, you shed your last piece of clothing, leaving you completely bare in front of your husband. It was a strange feeling to reveal yourself to him. It felt new yet familiar to allow him to see you. 

However, he didn't dare to look, even when you approached the tub. It wasn't clear whether he just tried to be respectful or if seeing you like this for the first time after months was too much for him to bear. His reaction reminded you that he never answered your question about you joining him. Maybe he was the one who wasn’t okay with this. 

Spencer’s eyes widened as he noticed the change of your mood before you did. Within a split second your heart started pounding and you stepped back to reach for your bathrobe. 

“Sorry, this was a stupid idea,” you muttered as you turned around to shield your body from his sight and your heart from the rejection. 

“My love,” he cooed from behind you.

The sound of splashing water gave away that he was exiting the tub. From the corner of your eyes you saw how he reached for his own robe. 

You felt his presence behind you. “Can I touch you?”

You nodded as you turned around, finding him wrapped in his robe with water still dripping from his jawline. Spencer reached out his hands to pull you into his arms. 

“What just happened?” He wondered, his voice laced with concern. 

Before you could think about it, you mumbled, “You didn't want to look at me.”

Your husband thought about your words for a moment, replaying the scene that had just unfolded in his mind. What you said wasn’t true. He wanted to look at you, to admire you fully like he had done countless times before. 

“I was afraid it would make you uncomfortable,” he confessed as he pulled back to be able to find your eyes. 

It was hard to read your expression which was not surprising considering you were mostly confused about your current state yourself.

“I miss the way you used to look at my body. I miss being close to you,” you whispered and paused for a moment. “I miss… sex.”

He closed his eyes before placing an innocent kiss on your forehead. “I know,” he breathed. Me too, he thought.

“Do you still think about it?” You wanted to know. 

“Sex?” 

Nodding, you watched his facial features intently. Ever since your attack, there were many occasions when the two of you had tiptoed around this subject. But never before had you been so blunt about it. 

It seemed like he was looking for the right words. “Yes, I do,” was what he settled on.

Raising your eyebrows, you asked, “With me?” 

The insecurity in your question wasn’t lost on Spencer but he still couldn't hold back a breathy laugh. “Of course, silly girl. You're my wife.”

“It’s just been so long that I would understand if you ever thought about doing it with someone else.”

“Stop that right now,” he said with a firm yet loving tone. “I would never cheat on you.” 

A shaky breath escaped your throat before you dared to say what had been bugging you for weeks now. “What if I’ll never be ready? What if things won’t ever be like before?” 

“That would be okay, too,” he reassured you. “There are many ways to create nearness and intimacy. Sex is just one way but it’s not necessary. At least for me it’s not.” 

“So you’d be okay to live without sex?” 

“Before I met you I thought that was my only option,” he quipped. 

You knew there had been a handful of women before you but you appreciated his joke nonetheless. It made you smile. 

Spencer let his fingertips brush over your cheeks. “But to answer your question, yes, I would be okay with that.”

His words were genuine. The way he looked at you with the most loving expression made your heart jump. The amber of his irises radiated a warmth you could get drunk on. You nestled your head against his chest and he held you even closer against his body. He was right. Sex wasn’t necessary to create nearness. However, you were still curious about what else you felt safe enough to try. 

“I want to get into the bathtub with you,” you whispered. “And I want you to look at me.” 

Loosening the embrace, you looked at your husband. With a nod he confirmed that he wanted that, too. 

With shaking fingers you brushed over his robe before gripping the material. “And I want to see you, too.”

Together you helped each other out of your robes until you stood bare in front of each other. You took a moment to admire the man in front of you. It had been a while since you had seen him like that. Unlike you he didn't deliberately hide his body from your sight but there hadn’t been many occasions in the past few months that allowed you to see him unclothed. 

His body looked familiar yet different at the same time. His tummy was a little bit softer than you remembered and you imagined what it would feel like underneath your palm. 

Spencer dared to let his eyes drop down to take in every inch of skin within sight. The way he looked at you made your skin tingle and you noticed how it broke out in goosebumps. 

“You're so beautiful,” he purred as he tentatively brushed over your arms. 

Tilting your head, you placed a soft kiss on his lips before breathing against them, “So are you.”

He took your hand in his to walk you over to the bathtub. Your husband got in first, bending his knees in an attempt to make himself smaller than he was. There was enough space to join him, a relieved sigh falling from your lips when you felt the warm water enveloping your body. 

First you sat a little awkwardly opposite one another for a few moments before you felt confident enough to get closer. Gently, you placed your hands on his knees to part them before moving closer to lean against his body sitting between his legs. Spencer’s heart pounded rapidly against his ribcage as you nestled against his chest. 

“Is that okay?” You wanted to make sure. 

“Yeah, I uh… I’m not sure where to put my hands,” he chuckled and you noticed how they hovered above the edge of the bathtub. 

Taking his hands in yours, you guided them towards the water, placing them underneath your chest. Even though you expected his touch, you still jerked when you felt his palms make contact with your body. 

Instinctively, your husband wanted to retract his hands again but you held them still with your own palms pressed against them. Once the initial shock faded, you were certain that you wanted to be held exactly like that. 

A part of you still wanted to fight this vulnerable situation but a much bigger, much more confident part longed to be close to the love of your life. 

It was as if Spencer sensed your ambiguity. “You okay?” 

“Yes,” you confirmed. Then you thought about the way your body flinched when he touched you. It had happened before each time Spencer had touched you in places that he had touched, too. “I just feel like my body has to relearn a couple of things.”

Spencer nodded before finally being able to relax a bit. He leaned back while holding you against him, relishing the sensation of having you close without any barriers between you. Just for a moment he forgot about what had happened to you and to your own surprise, so did you. 

For the following weeks you made it a new habit to take baths with each other. There was something so sweet about getting clean together, it became a sacred ritual you wanted to repeat over and over. 

Slowly but surely you got more comfortable around Spencer. There was a time when you didn't think it was possible that the two of you would cuddle every night and every morning without constantly having to fear that you’d freak out at any given moment. 

But just like that it happened. Spencer didn't have to think twice about hugging you from behind and leaving a feather-light kiss on your neck. He didn't hesitate to pull you into his arms when he woke up before you. 

He did however wake up in shock and almost jumped out of bed when one morning he realized he had sleepily pressed his erection against your thigh. Having woken up before him, you had noticed it, too. You could have easily moved away but found no reason to do so.

“I’m so sorry,” Spencer murmured as he moved away from you, his voice still sounding raspy from his slumber.

“You don’t have to apologize for that, Spencer. I know basic biology,” you snickered. “Now come back here.”

Hesitantly, he moved back towards your open arms. The warmth you radiated was too hard to resist so it took very little convincing for him to find his place inside your embrace again. 

Gentle fingertips danced along his arms, making him hum in contentment. It had always amazed you how his skin felt so particularly soft and tender in the morning. His curls hung unruly from his head and you couldn't resist intertwining your fingers with them. 

You thought back to the many times you had woken up like this. Back then when it still was normal for your hands to become curious enough to explore every curve and dip of each other’s bodies. 

It was odd to think about before. Sometimes it felt like a lifetime away, other times it felt like nothing had ever changed. It made you feel like the man who hurt you had the power to bring a new time reckoning upon you. You didn't want him to. 

It only spurred you further on to fully reclaim your body again. 

Your fingers found Spencer’s jaw to tilt his head just enough for you to be able to kiss him. His lips felt so soft as he slowly reciprocated your actions. It was sweet and innocent at first but your desire to feel more of him only grew the longer you kissed. Slightly shifting your leg you could feel his hardness again, making him whimper at the sudden pressure against it. 

As your hand found its way under his shirt, you brushed over the softness of his tummy. Shaking fingertips followed the trail of hair leading further down before changing their direction and moving upwards to feel his chest. The beating of his heart was faster than usual, almost erratic. 

With cautious motions he mirrored your eagerness and let his palm wander beneath your shirt as well. You deepened the kiss when you felt his fingers wander over your waist, leaving goosebumps on their path. Spencer became hungry, almost desperate as his tongue brushed over yours, melting into you in a way he hadn’t for too long. 

It was what you longed for too, what you had been hoping to finally be ready for. 

Then he touched your breast and it all came crashing down again. 

“Stop!” 

Healing really wasn’t linear. 

In an instant Spencer retracted his hand and leaned back to give you some space. Widened eyes looked back at him and it took both of you a second to realize what had just happened. Before he could apologize, you did. 

“I’m sorry… I really thought I was okay with that.”

For a moment Spencer closed his eyes and took in a deep breath. Then he looked at you again, a soft expression on his face. “Please don’t ever feel the need to apologize for that,” he cooed. 

Unlike other times, you were able to calm down quickly. Instead of pushing your husband further away, you still yearned for his proximity. He seemed surprised when you moved closer to him again to lay your head down on his chest. Content to still have the privilege to hold you close, he wrapped his arms around you before a relieved sigh fell from his lips. 

There was no need to leave the comfort of your shared bed just yet, so you just lay there together, basking in each other’s warmth. 

Spencer placed a gentle kiss into your hair before breathing, “I love you.” 

“I love you more.”

You tried your best to be kind to yourself in that moment. It was a learning opportunity for you. Just a few weeks ago lying close to your husband like that was unthinkable. Even if they felt like baby steps at the time, it was still progress. 

The images of recent intimate encounters flooded your mind and let a pleasant calmness spread through your body. Spencer’s kisses tasted sweet and made you feel insatiable, always longing for more. Feeling his skin pressed against yours as he held you close in the bathtub enveloped you in a safe feeling unlike anything else. 

You thought back to those rare moments when you considered taking things further lately, just like you had tried just now. There was something you had wondered about. 

“I have noticed that when we cuddle…,” you began your sentence, unsure of how to continue. “Even when we’re naked in the bathtub together, you uhm… never get aroused? That was very different before.” 

Spencer cleared his throat. “Yeah,” he let out an awkward laugh. “I try really hard not to. I think about baseball a lot.” 

His response confused you. Propping yourself up on one elbow, you raised your eyebrows at him. “You think about baseball when we’re taking baths together? You don’t even like sports.” 

Spencer just shrugged and added, “Sometimes I try to solve equations, too.”

“Please don’t do that anymore,” you pleaded as you laid back down beside him. “It makes me feel good to see you’re still interested in me.” 

“Of course I am still interested. I just really do not want to make you uncomfortable or feel pressured in any way.”

Your words were genuine when you said, “I don’t think that will happen. I actually really liked seeing you in all of your morning glory earlier.”

Your husband smiled at you. “Yeah?”

A smirk formed on your face. “It reminded me of the countless times we were both late for work because we couldn’t keep our hands to ourselves after waking up.” 

“That was fun,” Spencer chuckled. “What wasn’t fun though was the conversation I had to have with Hotch after being late four days in a row.” 

His words made you laugh, too. Then, after a few moments of comfortable silence, your husband hesitantly asked, “Can I ask you something?” 

Tilting your head to find his eyes, you responded, “Of course.”

“You don’t have to answer this but I’m wondering… Do you ever get aroused in those moments, too?” 

You were used to talking openly about intimacy with your husband, that had always been a normal part of your relationship. His question didn't feel odd and you wanted to respond to it. 

For a long time after what happened, your longing to feel his nearness wasn’t connected to any sexual desires. At times you even felt like your libido had gotten lost entirely. Recently that had changed. 

More and more you had become aware of the little spark inside you that was ignited when you were with him. It was very different from the burning flame that was there before but your desire grew each time you were together. 

“Lately, yes,” you sincerely answered. Thinking about it some more, you decided to share another detail with him. “I even started uhm… touching myself again.”

Spencer seemed a little surprised by your response. “You did? That's good to hear.” His palm brushed gently over your arm when he added, “I can imagine that's a good way to feel a connection to your body and your needs.” 

For a second you thought he might start one of his ramblings to share all his knowledge about the health benefits of masturbating. He didn't, though. 

“Yeah, it feels nice. Almost normal,” you said instead. “I obviously still have a long way to go when it comes to sex but… I finally feel like I’ll actually get there, eventually.”

“There's no rush,” he reminded you. “We have all the time in the world.” 

Your lips met his in a tender kiss. “Thank you for being so patient with me.” 

After a few more moments of enjoying each other's company, it was time to get up and get ready for the workday. That night you found yourself tangled up in bed with your husband again. 

As you breathed in his scent and felt the heat radiating off his skin, you noticed it again – the little spark inside your chest flared up and spread a tingling sensation through your body. 

Your mouth found Spencer's neck to leave a trail of kisses along it, before it moved over his jawline and found his lips at last. He hummed when you kissed him and you could feel his fingertips twitching against your waist. 

It didn't take long until you deepened the kiss, a quiet moan slipping through your lips when Spencer’s tongue found yours. 

With your body pressed against his you didn't allow any distance between the two of you. It still wasn’t enough for you, though. There was too much fabric in the way of really feeling close to him. 

Your hand moved to the hem of his shirt to grip it and impatiently push it upwards. Spencer moved with you as you pulled it over his head. When your fingers moved to the waistband of his pajama pants next, he interrupted the kiss to find your eyes. 

A smile was painted over your face when you nodded, reassuring him that you were okay. You weren’t sure yet where exactly this was going but you felt safe enough to explore your options.

“We can stop or slow down at any point,” he reminded you.

“I know.”

After kissing him again, you sat up so you could continue undressing him. Slowly you pulled down his pants, an audible breath falling from your lips when you saw he was already half-hard. 

Spencer scanned your face for any sign of discomfort but found none. What he saw instead was excitement and curiosity. It made him smile. 

He sat up and brushed his hands over the fabric of your shirt. By lifting your arms over your head you gave him the sign he needed to remove the piece of fabric. He gently motioned for you to lay back down before he made contact with your hips, carefully brushing over your pajama shorts. 

There was no hesitation to be found when you lifted your hips for him to pull them down, without ever breaking eye contact. You thought about how different this situation was from being naked with him in the bathtub. Some parts of you remained hidden from him even then. 

You wanted him to see you, even when being exposed to him like that still felt a little scary.

After he had dropped the last piece of clothing on the floor, you dared to open your thighs for him to see every part of you. A rosy shade spread over his cheeks as he dared to look at you. It reminded you of when you were with him for the very first time many years ago. 

Just like then, he breathed, “You're so beautiful.” 

You could feel how some arousal had already gathered at your center and wondered if Spencer could see the glistening. By the way his pupils dilated you had a hunch that he did. 

Then, after he had fully taken in your beauty, it was as if he was frozen in place. He used to be so confident in situations like that, knowing your body better than his own and never questioning his next move. Things were very different now and you both sensed it. 

His eyes met yours and it became obvious how unsure he was of how to proceed. 

Opening your arms, you cooed, “Come here, love.” 

He seemed relieved when he lay back down beside you again. You wanted to kiss him but he hesitated. 

After a moment, he suggested, “I think it would be helpful if you talked to me more. I need you to tell me exactly what you want to do.”

“I’m figuring this out as we go, too,” you explained. “Right now I don't know where this is going. I only know that I really want to kiss you.”

His nose brushed against yours. “I would really like that, too.”

Just a split second later you got lost in another kiss. The way your bodies were pressed against one another while your lips were connected let you briefly forget where your body ended and his began. After shifting your position, you became well aware of that again. 

Spencer was fully hard now and his erection was firmly pressed against your thigh. You moved your leg slightly, prompting him to whimper into your mouth. The hand on your waist moved down to your hip and his fingertips pressed into your skin. 

“Hey,” you mumbled against his lips. “Can we slow down for a moment?” 

His grip on your hip lightened immediately before he moved his hand back up to your waist. Spencer placed one last peck on your mouth and pulled back. “Do you want to stop?” 

You shook your head. “No, I just need a little break. To make sure it doesn't get too much.” 

The truth was that you felt really good in that moment. Excited, loved and so, so turned on. It just felt safer to take things slowly. Gently you pushed against his shoulder until he was lying on his back. You found your home inside his arms. 

Your lips grazed over his cheek as you breathed, “How are you feeling, Spencer?” 

He chuckled at your question. “You have no idea how good I’m feeling right now.” 

As you let your head rest on his shoulder, you dared to look down at his body. The extent of his desire laid on his stomach and you noticed how a bead of precum had formed at his tip. Your fingers itched to touch him, to remember how hot and heavy his cock always felt inside your palm. 

A curious hand made its way down his chest, over the side of his stomach, brushing along his thigh. For a second you hesitated but then you let your palm hover over his hardness. 

Then you felt a pit form in your stomach and decided to retract your hand again. It might have just been your nervousness but that didn't change the fact that you couldn't continue in this moment. 

Your husband had watched each of your motions intently. It was obvious that he was burning to find relief. 

Tilting your head to find his eyes, you purred, “I want you to feel good.”

“It’s okay, my love. You don’t have to,” he reminded you.

You knew that, of course. There was still something else you could do together. 

As you began kissing his neck, his throat vibrated under your lips and a moan escaped his mouth. Then, you whispered into his ear, “I want you to touch yourself.”

Spencer’s eyes widened at your request and the rosy color on his cheeks turned a shade darker. It seemed like he needed a little more encouragement, so you lay back down inside his arm and opened your legs to give yourself access. 

“Okay, I’ll start,” you teased as you let your hand wander down your own body. 

Mesmerized by the sight, his eyes followed the path of your fingers. When you parted your folds to access your most sensitive spot, Spencer hissed a curse. 

The honeyed wetness between your legs made it easy for your fingertips to move through your folds. It felt relieving to touch yourself like that. Just like Spencer you were yearning for release. 

When your husband heard your heavy sighs as you pleasured yourself, he couldn't hold back anymore. You watched as his hand found his cock, a view that let your heart pound inside your chest. 

First, he wrapped his fingers around his shaft and squeezed, prompting droplets of his arousal to run down his tip. Then, he swiped his thumb over the leaking head before he slowly began moving up and down. Your mouth hung open as you watched that sinful scene unfold in front of you. 

As Spencer accelerated the pace of his fist, sounds of pleasure filled the room. His eyebrows were scrunched up and desperation was written all over his face. 

He had never looked more beautiful.

Distracted by the mesmerizing view, the hand at your core stopped moving. Instead of continuing, you let it wander away from your body to touch Spencer’s thigh. Before you could overthink it, your hand kept moving to his center. 

A heavy breath fell from his lips as your fingertips cautiously brushed over the velvety skin of his balls, making his body jerk underneath you. Smiling to yourself, you remembered how sensitive he was. 

Spencer stopped moving his hand, waiting to see how you’d proceed. When you touched the soft curls at his base, he whimpered. It was then that you realized that you were not scared anymore and that your nervousness had turned into excitement. 

“Can I continue?”

Spencer audibly gulped before removing his hand. “Yes… please.” 

When you wrapped your fingers around his length, both of you moaned in unison. Holding him in your hand like that felt both familiar and novel at the same time. You started moving your palm and quickly remembered how exactly he liked to be touched. 

“Fuck,” he groaned. “Feels good!” 

With all the built-up tension and those months of abstinence, it only took a few moments until Spencer was getting close to reaching his point of no return. Familiar with all the telltale signs of his impending climax, you continued caressing him. Coming closer to his undoing, his cock twitched inside your palm and his entire body started quivering. 

His release began spilling over your hand and onto his stomach while he kept pulsing against your fingers. You kissed his jaw and his neck before you reached for the tissues on your nightstand to do some damage control of the mess you had created. 

Your husband’s chest was still heaving when you finished cleaning him up. Concern was written all over his face when he found your eyes.

He pulled you back into his embrace as he asked, “Are you okay?”

“Yeah I am. That was really fun,” you snickered. 

Spencer's hand brushed over your back as he placed a soft kiss on your mouth. “Do you want me to touch you?”

The truth was that your entire body was aching for his touch. You could feel the heat burning between your legs and were aware that your arousal had started coating the insides of your thighs. It had been a long time since you’d felt so turned on. 

And yet, the thought of him actually doing something about it made you nervous. 

“I’m not sure,” you admitted. “I would like to kiss you again, though.”

He let out a breathy laugh before finding your mouth once more. Feeling his lips on yours only blazed up the fire burning inside you. You shifted your position until you were hovering over your husband, one of his thighs pressed between yours. 

Tentatively you began rocking your hips against his leg, sighing as you realized how pleasant the friction was. 

“Is that okay?” You breathed against his lips as you kept moving. 

“More than okay,” he reassured you. “Use my body however you like.”

You sat up as you ground against his skin, feeling him tense his thigh underneath you. Taking his hands in yours, you placed them on your hips so he could help you move. Soon you had created a mess on his leg as you spread your wetness along his skin. 

With your entire entire body twitching, your motions became erratic. Looking down at Spencer, you found him staring at you with lust-filled eyes and a wicked grin painted over his face. 

As you danced along the edge of euphoria, you forgot your surroundings. It was only you and him right then. “I love you,” you whimpered and before your husband could respond, you collapsed into his arms as pleasure overcame you. You kept pressing your core against his leg as your whole body shook. 

Spencer held you firmly inside his arms as you came down from your high. He kissed your forehead and whispered, “I love you more.”

After your heart rate had come down to a normal frequency and you weren’t panting anymore, you kissed your husband. 

“How are you feeling?” He wanted to know. 

“Good. And also a little sticky,” you snickered, hinting at the mess you had created between your legs. 

“Yeah, me too,” Spencer chuckled. “How about I run us a bath so we can get cleaned up?” 

The prospect of that made your heart flutter. “That sounds wonderful.”

Author's Note: Writing this story took me two years and I am so relieved I was finally able to get it to paper. I hope reading it felt as cathartic for you as writing it was for me. Thank you for reading! I would really appreciate a reblog and a comment.

Taglist: @adoredfromafar @grumpyy-bearr @frickin-bats @pleasantwitchgarden @cynbx @xserenax-13 @alexxavicry @samuel-de-champagne-problems @evvy96 @reidsbookclub @lover-of-books-and-tea @sebs-oxygen @nomajdetective @kobaltdragon @matthew-gray-gubler-lover @castiels-majestic-wings

[runraerun]

Steddie Amnesia Fic: 1/3

-> Part 2 | Part 3 | AO3

cw: lots of head trauma/brain injury/recovery stuff.

Steve wakes up in the hospital with someone snoring loudly on his leg, mouth open, drool getting soaked up into the scratchy hospital blanket over him.

Steve just stares.

It’s… Freddie? No, that’s not right... Eddie! Eddie ‘the freak’ Munson, known delinquent and drug dealer… resting his head on Steve’s lap.

What the hell…?

Steve reaches up with a wobbly, IV-ridden hand to clumsily pat along his head, but instead of meeting messy hair, he meets a thick wad of bandages. He flinches when he hits an especially tender spot.

It’s not much but it’s enough to wake Eddie Munson up with a jolt, and a random jumble of words that sounded something like, “the dice have spoken!”, but Steve can’t be sure. Not with the sharp ringing still going off inside his skull.

“Steve? Steve! Oh thank fuck, Jesus H. Christ, you scared the ever loving shit out of me.” Eddie stood and grabbed at one of Steve’s shoulders, shaking him enough to elicit another wince.

“Oh, damn, sorry. I’m like a fucking bull in a china shop here, man. There’s way too much expensive, breakable shit here. I’m not used to it. I accidentally ripped your IV out the other day... Fuck. The nurses hate my guts.” Eddie chuckles, eyes wide and solely on Steve, talking like they were old friends or something.

But that can’t be right. Steve doesn’t remember saying more than two words to Eddie Munson during the entire time he knew he even existed, and even then it was just to discuss weed prices.

“For real though, talk to me Harrington, how you feelin’, hm? Loopy? Gonna yak again? Apparently they got you on the good stuff,” Eddie flicks a liquid filled bag hanging above Steve and shakes his head, “but they keep cutting you back. Dicks.”

Steve’s eyes try and follow Eddie’s erratic movements but his eyes ache the more he moves them. He blinks against the harsh fluorescents and tries to open his mouth. And thank God, Eddie Munson seems to take this as a sign and shut up.

“What happened?” Steve finally croaks.

One of Eddie’s brows jumps. “You don’t remember?”

Steve gives his head a small shake. Did Eddie hit him with his car or something? Is that why he’s sleeping at his bedside and talking to him like they’re buddies?

“You fell, Stevie.” Eddie makes a whistling noise and mimicks something falling with his hands, then makes a crashing sound when his hand lands on Steve’s bandaged head. “Like a coconut out of a tree. Landed right on that big ol’ melon of yours. There was blood everywhere. It scared the shit out of me and the kids. Especially when you wouldn’t wake up.”

Steve’s throat feels like sandpaper, but he manages to swallow, his throat clicking as he did, and gets out, “The kids?”

Eddie seems to notice, even before Steve can ask, and reaches for a water bottle with a straw already in it, and half chewed. Eddie’s own, no doubt. Against his better judgment, Steve accepts it when Eddie offers it to him. He was just so goddamn thirsty.

“Don’t worry, they’re all fine. They were just shaken up. I’ll radio the little gremlins and give ‘em the good news in a sec.” Eddie’s smile falters a little, seeming lost for words. Like he wants to say something, but can’t quite get it out.

Steve finishes swallowing his few, meager gulps of water before he asks, “What is it?”

“Don’t freak out—“ Eddie begins.

And, okay, that’s exactly the thing you tell someone before they freak the fuck out. Steve’s stomach is subject to a growing, sluggish panic. “What? Dude, tell me—“

“It’s your hair.” Eddie seems genuinely pained at having to deliver this crushing of a blow to Steve ‘The Hair’ Harrington.

Steve can hear the beeping from the monitors he’s hooked up to begin to pick up speed as his heart begins racing. “My hair?”

“It’s okay! It’s okay, it’ll grow back! They just had to take a little bit off where the stitches went, you can hardest notice it—well, that’s a fucking lie, you could spot that landing strip from space—but I think if you part it to the other side it won’t look so… y’know.”

“No, dude, I don’t know.” Steve says, eyes wide, brows pinched.

“Like a drunk toddler took a pair of rusty kitchen shears to your mop.” Eddie says, huffing out a nervous sort of laugh.

Steve groans, half due to the bastardization that’s happened to his favorite feature, and half due to the migraine that’s looming on his horizon.

“You’re still pretty, Stevie, don’t worry.” Eddie grins, eyebrows raised, like he’s trying to be cute or something.

That weirdest part is, it’s kind of working.

Steve must have hit his head really, really hard.

The doctors eventually come in and perform all sorts of tests, and he tries his best to comply with them and jump through whatever hoops they make him jump through. He just wants to get the hell out of this hospital bed.

Unfortunately for him, Steve hadn’t exactly aced any of the tests.

In fact, he had failed most of them pretty fucking dismally. He couldn’t remember the date, who the president was, where he lived, couldn’t say the alphabet backwards… although, who the fuck can do that? He stands by that failing grade.

A couple of CAT scans later and it’s clear that Steve’s brain got smacked around a little more than they had originally thought.

Among a pile of other stuff, the thing that sticks out the most to Steve is his diagnosis of something called short term amnesia. They explain it like the past 2 to 3 years has just been wiped from his brain. The last clear thing he really remembers is getting the shit beat out of him by Billy, and then it all sort of gets jumbled. Fragmented. The doctors explain that this is pretty typical for head trauma patients.

He’s a head trauma patient, now.

It’s normal for memories of trauma to link, creating spiderwebs throughout your brain.

Which, that’s great. So when he gets beat up again, there’s always a chance his brain will try and erase his easy, happy years and revert back to a trauma default. Really helpful brain, thank you.

And the thing that sucks the most is that his years after the Billy beat down sound pretty great. Traumatizing, sure, but great. Once the Upside Down shit was locked up, with every scary nightmare fuel monster inside of it, life in Hawkins didn’t sound all that terrible.

He lived with Robin, who’s his best friend, (his ‘platonic soulmate’ even, as she explains it), he’s working a retail job, (also with Robin), and coaches the high school basketball team during the evenings. He’d even been talking with Hopper about joining the force.

Well, he was. Now he’s more or less useless, working full time at re-learning his life, along with a couple of fine motor skills that got glitchy after the fall.

And then there’s Eddie.

Eddie, who’s apparently also his best friend, only their soulmate link isn’t platonic at all.

The strange and weirdly exciting reality was that Steve Harrington had woken up from his 3-day medically induced coma with not only a full fledged relationship, but a boyfriend.

It’s a lot to digest, and part of him still doesn’t even know how to process it, but hearing the stories being told around him, seeing how Eddie is practically living in his and Robin’s two-bedroom apartment, and just… the way Eddie looks at him?

It’s with love—Steve can see it. Feel it. Eddie’s practically vibrating with it.

What’s even crazier is that when Steve looks at Eddie, he feels the exact same way.

It’s like looking at the stars. Steve’s heart skips a beat when those dark eyes of hit him, and Steve wants nothing more than to make Eddie smile—no, better than that, to make him laugh, just so he can watch Eddie’s adam’s apple bob up and down and hear that manic, unhinged cackle. It’s downright delightful. Steve loves being in relationships like this, where it’s all consuming.

Steve may not have the memories of falling in love with Eddie, but he has all the feelings.

No one talks about it with Steve, of course. Maybe they think it’s going to be too heavy for him to process that he’s into dudes now, but Steve isn’t a big dumb baby. Sure, he’s got a pretty severe brain injury, and yeah, alright, it takes him a minute to remember people’s names sometimes, and he has a harder time controlling his emotions, but he isn’t a complete invalid. Only a little bit of one. He’s working on it, dammit.

And Eddie is so painfully, frustratingly patient with him. He never pushes. He’s clearly letting Steve retrieve his memories before he makes a move, because despite his whole outward appearance, Eddie Munson is a goddamn gentleman. He never so much as reaches for Steve’s hands, but Steve can tell by the way their pinkies graze when they watch movies late at night that he wants to.

Steve can tell by the way Eddie teases him, the way he’s there with him through his recovery, that he doesn’t ever make Steve feel stupid when he asks the same questions over and over again, when he cries at the drop of a hat or when he gets sort of confused about the lay out of his apartment—he doesn’t care about that of that.

Because he’s in love with Steve. It’s so painfully romantic, it brings a painful lump to Steve’s throat every time he thinks too much about it.

The two of them are driving to one of Steve’s therapy sessions, Eddie in the driver's seat, Steve in the passengers, listening to a low racket of some kind of heavy metal music. Eddie always keeps the volume low now, for Steve.

He’s just been so intensely good about everything that Steve needs to try and do something good for Eddie in return. He needs Eddie to know that there’s a light at the end of this tunnel that they’re both currently lost in.

“I’m sorry about this, y’know.” Steve says when they finally pull up the building that has ‘Brain Injury Recover Center’ written on the front. So all the boys and girls with scrambled eggs for brains know where to converge.

“Don’t worry about it, man. I work the evening shifts, remember? My days are free.” Eddie explains, and Steve wonders if he’s had to be told this bit of information a couple of times now. Sometimes it takes a few times before something sticks to his brain now. His short term memory is still majorly flighty. But no, Steve remembers that Eddie bartends at a local bowling alley most evenings. He’s gone a few times. Not to bowl, of course—too much hand eye coordination involved—but just to hang out with Eddie. He’s pretty decent at Ms. Pac-Man though.

Steve shakes his head. He knows his mind must have wandered because there’s been a lull where no one’s spoken. Eddie never seems to care about that though. “I don’t mean about the drive. I was talking about… y’know.”

“Wha’dy’mean?” Eddie mumbles as he backs into his parking space, hand on the back of Steve’s headrest.

Steve sighs and decides to just come out and say it: “I mean having your boyfriend forget everything about you and your relationship. I just… that must be really tough.”

Everything in Eddie Munson comes to a jarring halt, hand frozen over where he’s turned to ignition off.

It’s sort of unnerving—Eddie is always moving, fidgeting. Damn near bouncing off the walls. But now it’s like someone hit the poor guy with a freeze ray gun.

Steve chuckles softly as he reaches out and touches Eddie’s arm, giving him a playful jostle, to loosen him up a little, “it’s okay, Eddie. I know. You don’t have to keep going easy on me. I’m gay! Or, bi-sexual. Whatever.” Steve shrugs, “see? Not falling apart. I can handle being in love with another dude. You don’t need to keep babying me.”

The side of Eddie’s mouth twitches into a downturned smile that he seems to be trying to hide.

“I know, I know. Not just any dude.” Steve rolls his eyes, a smile still firmly on his face. He takes Eddie’s hand from the steering wheel, and Eddie seems to watch it go in a detached sort of awe. Steve wonders if Eddie’s proud of him for being so cool with it all. “In love with you.”

“Steve, I don’t think—

“Wait, just let me finish.” Steve asks, and Eddie blinks and works on closing his mouth. Knows it’s important to let Steve get his thoughts out quickly, lest they be lost to the giant black hole inside of his beat-up brain now. “I know that I don’t remember any of the important stuff with us. Our first date, or our first kiss or, y’know, any of our other first firsts. So maybe it feels like you’re cheating on the old Steve with me? But… Eddie, I know it’s crazy but even though my brain forgot all of the specifics; my heart didn’t. I look at you, and it’s all there. I’m still so into you, dude. I can feel it, even though I don’t remember how I got here. I’m in l—“

“Steve! Stevestevesteve wait, holy shit—!” Eddie’s eyes snap up from his intense stare at the place where their hands are linked. “Steve—”

“Yeah?” Steve prompts when Eddie doesn’t seem to be able to find the words. He runs his thumb gently over Eddie’s knuckles. It feels so nice to finally be able to hold his hand again. They fit together so well, and Steve wonders briefly if it’s some kind of muscle memory.

Eddie opens his mouth a few more times before he remembers how to make the words come out.

“Steve. Buddy. We’re… we’re not dating.”

Steve’s face falls, and he can feel a lump form in his throat, but he keeps a firm hold of Eddie’s warm hand in his own. “Yeah, I know, I know. We haven’t had any time to be a couple. And it’s probably been torture for you, man. You’re so busy taking care of me and making sure I don’t freak out over everything that you’ve clearly been neglecting your own hierarchy of needs.”

Eddie raises a brow.

Steve chuckles, “Shut up. It’s a therapy term.”

Eddie laughs in his throat. “Steve, you gotta slow down and listen to me.”

He turns his shoulders so that he’s fully facing Steve while he reaches his free hand over and tugs at one of his earlobes. “Got your hearing ears on?”

Steve rolls his eyes, but he nods just the same.

“We… we weren’t dating before your accident,” Eddie speaks slowly, his voice warm, gentle. “Hell, I didn’t even know you were, y’know, into dudes like that. Much less me.”

Something throbs dully behind Steve’s eyes. It’s the start of a migraine—the one that makes it hard to process much of anything. Steve squints, trying to make sense of what Eddie’s saying. “…you’re not my boyfriend?”

Eddie shakes his head very, very slowly. “No.”

Steve snatches his hand back like he’s only just now noticed how burning hot Eddie’s hand is.

He settles back in his seat, staring out the front window. The sounds from the outside world are muffled, and everything feels far away and sort of… Made up. Just like everything he’d imagined was going on between him and Eddie. Not real.

He feels painfully detached from reality. Unmoored. Maybe this was the disassociation thing the doctor mentioned might happen…

“Are you sure?” Steve asks, risking another glance over to Eddie, who hasn’t taken his eyes off him for a second.

“Pretty fuckin’ sure.” Eddie snorts.

“Oh, God. This is… I’m—sorry. I’m so stupid. Fuck, I gotta—“ Steve suddenly attacks the door handle with a clumsy fury that has his hand fumbling with the handle for way too long. Fucking busted up, bruised as fuck fucking brain-!

“Steve, it’s okay, dude,” Eddie says from behind Steve, but that’s easy for him to say; he didn’t just humiliate himself in front of his not-boyfriend, definitely-crush, possibly ex-friend—“Steve, wait!”

Steve flees the van on unsteady feet, not daring to look back.

[nanivinsmoke]

❥ messy on a haystack

❥ dbf!logan x fem!reader

having a crush on an older man, your dad’s best friend , was something you never expected.

❥ tags: age gap (but it makes sense), based off of origins wolverine, reader is thick asf (country booty duhh), explicit language, creaming, squirting, breeding kink, pussy drunk logan, mutant awakening, semi-plot—needed him to fuck us asap, logan is a little pervy…

note: up next, fantasize. wc: 2.8k

your dad left the farm’s care in your hands this week, while he took a trip back to his hometown to check on his parents—your grandparents. which means that you were in charge of everything. from the animals, to the wood the men chopped, to the pay and the workers; you were in charge of it all. including him.

logan had known your father for a while, meeting him a few months after you left for college and that was practically six years ago. during that time, logan practically ran the farm with your father—he was his right hand man. everything was running smoothly, the farm had been booming for years. and then your father got sick, changing everything.

people found out about your father’s sickness and tried to get him sell. logan would scare them away most of the time, telling them to fuck off, but then the stress of running the farm started to jeopardize his health even more. so, logan found your number stashed in your father’s office—your dad’s too stubborn and old school to get a cellphone—and gave you a call. you caught the next flight out.

the moment you stepped on the dirt paved roads, everything seemed to perk back up. especially your old man. but, when logan laid eyes on you, he was finally able to see what you really looked like, (your dad kept old photos of you in his office) and he was amazed. you were gorgeous, prettiest lil thing he’d ever seen.

those deep blue flare jeans you wore, hugged you tighter than a grandma during holidays. and he never thought he was an ass man till he seen yours and how it sat in your jeans. and don’t get him started on how you filled out your the cropped white beater—fuck he sounded like a perv. but, it’s been a long time since he thought about a woman like that; and you were everything and then some.

after greeting your dad and explaining to him why you were here, you finally met the mysterious man who called you—and let’s just say he caught your eyes too. he was handsome, the rugged look he adorned was incredibly sexy and the way he would look at you; had your panties wet every night. if someone would hear your thoughts right now, they’d call you weird and tell you that he was old enough to be your father—but thank goodness he was not.

—

“time for lunch boys!” you yelled out to the men hard at work, watching them throw down their things and separate—happy to finally stop working and chow down. you watched as logan sauntered over towards you, standing on the porch; waiting for him to join you for lunch. “hi logan.”

“hey princess, what’s for lunch?” you blushed at the nickname and walked with him to the kitchen, where you had practically went all out. you made a big ole southern meal. you loved cooking, it was your love language. and he loved the meals you’d make.

the two of you sat down and began passing around the various dishes of food you had made, before he sparked up a conversation. “your dad left today, right? what day did he say he’ll be back?” his eyes locked onto yours as he picked the chicken you made, munching on it while he spoke.

“yeah and he won’t be back until…next monday.” he nodded and smirked, tossing back some more of the home cooked food you made. “so then i got you all to myself then?” you nearly choked on your mashed potatoes, eyes wide when you saw him smirking. there was no denying that you heard him, loud and clear.

just as you were about to respond, the kitchen timer went off—signaling that it was time to go back to work. you pouted and he hurried up to scarf down the glass of water beside his food before getting up and leaning over to kiss your forehead, “later princess. I’ll be back tonight.” you watched him leave, heart heavy with love and your mind going crazy with what happened at the table.

you spent the next few hours at the front office, crunching numbers and overseeing where the next shipment of wood was going. the sun going down and slipping past the horizon, made the workers excited as they all wrapped up their work and lined up to clock out. you watched from the porch, as they scanned their manilla colored time cards in front of the clock and headed home.

logan was the last one and when he clocked out, he made his way over towards you. his flannel was torn to shreds and his beater that made his toned torso stick out, was covered in dirt; showing how hard his day went. but all in all, he was still sexy, even when covered in dirt.

“logan~” your voice mimicked a siren, trying to seduce a sailor in by the sexy tone of their voice, while your eyes were low and lidded. he could feel himself grown in his pants from the sound of your voice, his desire for you growing by the second.

“need sumn’, princess?” his voice made you melt and you pressed your thighs together. “shower’s free and i made your bed. ooh, there’s leftovers in the fridge if you’re still hungry!” you smiled at him, trying to suppress a moan when his natural scent hit your nostrils. the smell of woods, hours old cologne and hard work, had your panties wet.

he nodded his head, licking his lips as his eyes traveled down to your thick thighs that were no longer being hidden by denim—before fixtating them back onto your own. “might have to marry ya’ one day.” he commented, planting a kiss on your forehead, before stepping into the house.

letting out a moan, you bit your lip and accepted the tingling sensation that throbbed down below. oh you needed him bad.

logan enjoyed the shower’s hot steaming waters, easing the tension in his muscles and helping him clear his brain. well at least he tried to, his head was clouded with thoughts of you. his best friend’s daughter.

once he stepped out of the shower and put on something comfy, he went down to the kitchen hoping to find you there, however much to his dismay you weren’t. he opened the fridge and pulled out a beer. just as he was about to put it his lips, he heard you let out a distressed scream and he took off running.

he could see you in front of the barn doors being harassed by the men that came a month ago, whom tried to get your dad to sell his land. one had a grip on your hair while the other stood in front, taunting you. logan practically pounced on them and his claws unsheathed, slicing them men up.

you back away and watched as they fought, blood splattering everywhere—but that’s not what worried you. what made you worry was when both of the men began to overpower logan—you had to help him. you realized there were some tools in the barn and as you moved to get, you appeared inside in the blink of an eye; grabbing a shovel before appearing right behind the fighting men again.

your mind was pushing out a million thoughts about what just happened, but you didn’t have time to focus on them right now; you had to save him. you swung with all of your might, knocking the men across the field and off of logan. their bodies crashed into other, giving logan ample enough time to pounce on them and fuck them up.

“get in the barn!” he yelled out, slicing them to bits and pieces—and just like before, you appeared in the barn.

–—

you were in there for quite a while, pacing back and forth; wondering what the hell was going on out there. the sounds of his grunting and the slicing of their skin could no longer be heard. you didn’t care what happened to them, they deserved hell or worse, all you cared about was logan.

the doors to the barn creaked open and you eyed it, but you relaxed when you saw him stomping in. your eyes watered at his bloody torso and you sprinted over to him, engulfing him in a hug. “baby, i was so worried about you!”

that nickname rolled off your tongue and he caught it, pulling you back to look at your face. he held you by your chin, puffing up your cheeks, before kissing your soft plump lips—while you gladly accepted his. the kiss was hot and a little sloppy. and when he pulled away from you, a trail spit following.

“been wanting to do that for awhile now. go ahead and take those off, you won’t be needing them,” he tugged on the hem of your shorts and you obliged. you quickly stripped them off along with your sunset colored thong, a web of your essence following. you were beyond soaked and he knew the moment he appeared in the barn, he could smell it.

you sat on a nearby haystack, spreading your legs and your slick coated lips, rubbing your sensitive little love bud. “please logan, wan’ you so bad.”

the lust that had built up over time, had overflowed and erupted; causing a change within you. and he loved it.

he watched with a lust filled glint in his eyes, his cock growing in his sweatpants as he watched you play with your pretty pussy—his desire and longing for you growing by the second. “think you can handle it, princess?” he asked and you nodded, slipping a finger in your aching hole; a sweet mewl leaving your lips.

he then replaced his finger with his fat leaky tip, pressing it right at your entrance; causing you to clamp down on nothing. he grunted and pushed through, stretching you open bit by bit; making you gasp and tear prick at the corner of your eyes.

“ ‘s too big—fuck!” that was an understatement. logan was huge, thick even. he was painfully big, but that’s exactly what you wanted. to be fucked dumb by his big fat painful cock.

“i know baby, but you can take it. yeah? —atta girl” he coached, splitting your cunt open as he pushed through, his tips inches away from kissing your cervix. logan leaned down and kissed away your tears, his cock pressing deep inside of you. he wiggled his hips around, helping you get used to his size and pressing his thumb to your clit; causing you to shudder.

the more he rubbed and he moved, the less pain you felt—and soon you were taking him so well. his cock was coated in your slick, a ring of white started form around his base as he plunged in and out of your wetness. logan watched your tits bounce out of your top with lidded eyes and the animal in him couldn’t help it anymore. his claws unsheathed and wrapped your top open—shredding it completely and freeing your jiggly mounds.

“so fucking—pretty. fuck, my pretty girl taking me so well!” his praises had you gushing all over him, clamping down on him as you started to see specks of white. you had never had an orgasm like this nor have you ever came so quickly before. none of the boys in college made you cum like this. but, that was the difference between logan and them. they were boys and he was a man.

“please don’t stop. please~” you begged, pulling him close while your orgasm flowed out of you. he grunted in your ear and your cunt weeped at the noise, his hips never faltering. “wasn’t planning on it sweetheart.” he moved his head down and took one of your hard nipples into his mouth, sucking on it like he was trying to pull milk from it.

you whined and bucked your hips up to match his thrusts, your clit pressing into him—adding more pleasure to your fucked out body.

you clung to him with each powerful thrust, his hips spanking your ass making a clapping sound erupt through the barn; accompanying your series of moans. your next orgasm approached by the minute, but this one felt different and you lowered your hips trying to back away.

“wait—wait, feels like m’gonna pee—“ but he didn’t budge, he stayed inside of your pussy—still drilling your cunt stilly—and let your nipple go with a pop; a web of saliva followed after him.

“just let go, trust me baby.” he smirked and gripped your hips, hazel eyes dancing over yours. you watched the dog tags around his neck jump with each pump, sending you straight to nirvana. your body shook as you let go, this orgasm different from your last; it was way more intense and you loved the feeling.

a clear stream of liquid splash out of you and onto his low stomach, pushing him out of you—drenching the hay bale beneath you. he slapped his cock onto your sensitive clit, coating himself in your essence.

when you finally calmed down, he leaned down and kissed your lips—hunger laced in it—his hips grinding against yours. and that’s when you realized something. he was still hard. you pulled away and looked at his swollen cock, shiny with your love. “baby, you didn’t get to cum?”

he pecked your lips some more, his tip now laying onto your belly, “just wanted to get you off first. see how pretty you looked when you came on my dick.”

you practically drooled at his words, eyes glued onto his girth that laid on your tummy—small hand fisting it, causing him to growl. “come sit your pretty ass down on my dick and ride me~”.

and that’s what you did for the next couple of minutes, riding him on the hay bale where he just made you squirt for the first time. webs of your messy fluids sticking to his thighs while you bounced and grinded on him—your boobs jiggling all in his face.

logan was losing himself under you, his cock twitching with each movement. he couldn’t wait anymore. he so desperately wanted to let go inside you. wanted to see your belly swollen in a few months with his kid and fuck another one right into you.

he gripped your ass, his hips bucking upwards, emptying ropes and ropes of his cum deep inside of you—filling you to the brim with his seed.

you rolled your hips, teasing him while leaning down to kiss him—tongues melting on one another. you pulled away and bit your lip, eyeing him with desire. the way he made you feel had you wanting more and he felt the same way. “take me inside.”

—

the two of you laid on his navy blue sheets, in each other’s arms, after a few more rounds of lovemaking. you toyed with his dog tags while he stared at your pretty face, loving how you looked with the moon glowing on you.

“your dad would kill me if he came back and saw us like this.” he spoke and you looked at him and smiled—getting on top of him and laying down on his muscled body.

“nah, i don’t think so. he’ll know i'm in good hands. ill be with the guy he’s going to sell the farm to, after all.” one of his beautiful thick eyebrows raised in response and you pressed a kiss to his lips.

“read the official letter in his office, he wants to sell the farm to you. im all for it. keep you close so we can have a litter of mutant babies together—now that i am one~”.

now it was his turn to smile and kiss on you. he rubbed circles on your back and pecked more kisses to your plump lips, “you’d look so pretty having my kids, with a ring on your finger and my last name attached to yours. i could see us turning that barn into our house, waking up next to you every day…”

“you can see all of that? you sure the wolverine isn’t a clairvoyant?” you joked and he roared with laughter. you smiled at him, so happy and content with every. so happy that you had to tell him, “i love you.”

his hazel eyes with hints of green widened and his smile became wider, “i love you more, doll.”