#but guys medical ethics is really REALLY important

[evilkitten3]

But listen, if Izuna had said yes to Hashirama's help after he was injured and he still died, would Madara rampage like in canon? Would he still chase the infinite tsukyomi?

the thing is, hashirama never offered to help izuna. i'm actually not sure he could have - the hiraishingiri pretty much cut through him like butter. moreover, while madara himself lauds hashirama's medical prowess, we actually know very little about his capabilities with medical ninjutsu. he could heal wounds without any hand seals, that's mostly all we know.

here are hashirama's words immediately after izuna is injured:

「マダラ・・・お前はオレには勝てない・・・もう・・・終わりにしよう・・・忍最強のうちはと千手が組めば・・・国も我々と見合う他の忍一族を見つけられなくなる・・・いずれ争いも沈静化していく」

"madara... you can't beat me... let's end it already. if the strongest shinobi, the uchiha and the senju, form an alliance... the country won't be able to find another shinobi clan able to counterbalance us... the conflict will eventually calm down"

he doesn't acknowledge izuna at all. whether he intended an offer of medical aid to be implied or not, it's never addressed. a bunch of people have claimed that this makes hashirama a jerk, and while i definitely get that viewpoint, i do think offering to help izuna without being absolutely certain he was capable of doing so would've been a terrible move, politically speaking. madara might have known that hashirama isn't the sort of man who would do something like this, but the rest of the uchiha clan would have no reason not to assume that hashirama didn't just take advantage of madara's kindness/trust/desperation/whatever to ensure that izuna died while potentially leaving room for madara to feel indebted to him for trying in spite of all the reasons he had not to bother.

hell, the clan might even come to the conclusion that madara intended for izuna to die so he could get his eyes, given what ended up happening in canon, so his fallout with them might actually happen even faster (and without the uchiha ever joining konoha at all, although without madara around to counter hashirama, i have no idea if/how the uchiha would manage against the senju from there)

all that aside, if hashirama had indeed offered help and izuna had agreed to take the risk and died anyway and the uchiha clan trusted that that was what had actually happened, i think pretty much everything else would've proceeded according to canon.

there's definitely plenty of fun possibilities to play around with concerning madara's path in life, but tbh i personally believe that without a massive deviation from canon, he would've eventually become who he became. hashirama definitely fucked up here and there, but i honestly don't think there was anything he could've personally done alone that would've changed madara's fate short of killing him back when they were kids, which he was never going to do. he was always doomed.

[garciaasfluffypen]

things are changing (and only for the better)

pairing: jemily x adhd!reader word count: 2.8k warnings: dialouge heavy, alcohol use, discussions of ethical non-monagamy/polyamory a/n: please please PLEASE tell me if i get anything about polyamory wrong in this series. i myself am not polyamorous, and i want to do this justice. if i'm doing anything wrong or harmful in my writing please let me know.

it had been weeks since you had a girls night with emily and jj, and you were thanking all the gods out there that you finally got to have one. 

the team had been whisked off on three back to back cases, leaving everyone begging for the weekend off. once it was granted, the first text you got before you even left the office was a message from jj stating “our house, wine, 30 minutes?” with an outstanding “YES PLEASE!!” being sent back within seconds of receiving the text from your favorite blonde. emily and jj had been amazing to you since figuring out about your adhd diagnosis, and knew how deliberating it could be if you weren’t on your medication. the inattentiveness had been your downfall multiple times, but your team knew how to accommodate you and make sure all of your needs were met to ensure you could work at your full capacity. specifically jj and emily. 

being on the medication around the team was very important to you. it was something you had been weary of, keeping them from seeing your adhd funks. it still was something you didn’t want to subject them too just yet. despite being on the team for a few years and being friends with them for longer, you had done a good job at keeping the full nature of your funks away from the team and frankly… you wanted to keep it that way. the only person who had seen you in your funk so far was hotch, but that was because you had fallen asleep at the office on a thursday night and didn’t get the chance to pick up your meds on the way home from work. and besides, you didn’t want to hear it from them, about how stupid you were for not taking your medication when you relied on it to keep your brain from shutting down. it had happened before, you forgot your meds at your apartment and had a date that ultimately ended up in you staying at your exes place. when you woke up the next morning and realized, they were upset when they realized you would be in one of your funks and practically shoved you out the door. 

you’d hate yourself if you lost emily and jj like that. 

you shook yourself out of your thoughts and grabbed the fruit platter you had picked up from sam’s club on the way to the house, heading over to the side door that you knew led straight to the kitchen. emily and jj were quietly talking to themselves by the counter, sending a wave of worry through you. they couldn’t be talking about you, right? they invited you over, they wanted you here, they--

“y/n!” jj’s eyes lit up as she saw you, coming over and pulling you in for a hug. “i was starting to think you didn’t want to come.”

“i wanted to get the fruit platter you guys like.” you sheepishly replied, a red hue covering your cheeks. “i felt bad coming empty handed.” 

“you know you don’t have to bring us anything, lovey.” 

your heart jolted as emily called you lovey, the nickname naturally falling out of her lips. lovey… you liked that.  

“i know, but i wanted to.” you shrugged. “it's the least i can do for all you’ve done with me the past couple weeks.” 

“you having proper accommodations is important, y/n. we want you to be comfortable.” 

you smiled at the brunette. “it means a lot to me, really, and i never really properly thanked you for being so attentive to everything.” 

jj came to squeeze your hand. “you don’t need to thank us. just being here is more than enough.” 

the blush found it's way back to your cheeks as you looked down, barely registering the look emily and jj shared before you felt a finger under your chin, lifting it to make you look into emily’s eyes. that was something new, something she had never done with you before. 

and you… liked it? 

“what were you feeling for dinner?”

“i’m not super picky,” you paused. “on nights like these i typically do something easy like mac and cheese or ramen or something but we don’t have to do that if you guys want something else.” 

emily chuckled, a loving glint in her eye. “if you want mac and cheese, we can get mac and cheese.” 

“i don’t want to make you guys special order me mac and cheese, you really don’t--”

“y/n.” jj locked eyes with you. “it’s on us tonight, promise. go put on your cozy clothes and get comfortable, yeah? we’ll get dinner set.” 

“i don’t want to be a bother…” 

“you’re never a bother, not to us.” jj paused. “is your rejection dysphoria acting up again?” 

“a little bit.” 

“do you want to talk about it?”

“can i get a glass of wine in my system before we talk about it?”

“of course. now go get cozy, i’m ready to curl up on the couch and shit talk all the stupid people we’ve run into over the past few weeks.” 

jj watched you as you chuckled and sauntered off to the main room before quickly turning around and running to grab your go bag before heading back in. emily came up and wrapped her arms around jj from behind, placing her head on the blonde’s shoulder. 

“y’know, this could be the last moments of us without y/n in our lives.”

“emily!” jj swatted at her arm. “don’t you dare say that.” 

“i’m just saying!” emily shot jj a joking look. “considering how they reacted to the finger under the chin, i doubt that will be an issue we’ll need to worry about, though.” 

“i hope so.” jj turned so she was facing emily. “i really like them, i like them a lot. and i want them to know that i can love both of you equally.” 

“and we’ll explain it to them if they decide they want to be our girlfriend, yeah?” emily squeezed jj’s hands. “we’ll take it one step at a time.” 

“do you think they like us?” 

“i would sure hope so, or else they wouldn’t be here.” emily looked to jj. “do you think they don’t like us?”

“it’s hard to tell with them, i’ll be honest. i’m just nervous they’re going to say no and everything is going to be messed up. i don’t even know if we fully explained the polyamory thing to them.” 

“i don’t think we did either, now that i’m thinking about it.” emily bit her lip. “okay so we start with that then.” 

“we start with that.”

emily and jj found a restaurant with something all three of you would want before ordering, making sure it would be there in a timely manner before heading out into the living room. emily went to change into her comfy clothes first, leaving her in a pair of yale sweatpants and an old shirt of jj’s that neither of them knew the origins of. returning with the wine she had been itching to pull out all week, emily plopped herself down on the couch and handed you a glass, smiling at you fondly as you took it while you bounced a mile a minute, talking about something you had seen on tik tok on the jet earlier. jj changed into the flannel pants she had stolen from emily eons ago, a pale blue oversized t shirt sitting on her small frame. jj came and sat on the other side of you, the way the three of you typically sat during girls nights, both women giving you all the attention you could desire while on one of your tangents. 

something was off, though. you could feel the vibe shift about an hour and a half into the night, your meals all discarded on the coffee table while you and emily nursed another glass of wine. jj had opted for her favorite beer at that point, the bottle opener sitting next to an empty styrofoam container with the discards of jj’s meal. your energy slowly faded as the dread started to set in, the rejection sensitive dysphoria feelings coming in full swing. you felt yourself start to get into a daze, fingers playing with the hem of your tee as you stared off into space. it took emily a minute to realize what was happening before she placed a supportive arm around you and pulled you close, placing a kiss to the top of your head. 

“what’s up, y/n?”

“the vibe is off.” you said, quieter than you had been the rest of the night. “something’s wrong.” 

“well, we did want to tell you something.” jj started. “it’s not bad. nothing bad is happening right now, but we were holding off on telling you in case you didn’t…” she paused. “how do i say this without sounding like an asshole?”

“we’re scared that you’ll see us differently after we tell you what we want to talk to you about.” 

“okay…” you looked between them, noticing genuine concern. “i’m gonna need more wine, aren’t i?” 

emily chuckled, the smile you know and love crossing her features. “well, that depends on how you take what we’re about to tell you.”

“i don’t need to be scared, right?” 

“not at all.” jj squeezed your hand, coming closer to you on the couch and leaning into your other side. “unless you see like a ghost or something. then you can be scared.” 

you chuckled. “i doubt there’s going to be a ghost in your house, jayje.” 

“you never know!” jj smiled slightly, glad that you weren’t too deep into the feeling of despair and could joke with her. “all kidding aside, are you in a mental state to have this conversation or do you want to sober up a little bit?” 

“no no, i’m okay.” you nodded. “as long as i don’t stand up. that’s when it’s all going to go to my head.” 

“understandable.” emily rested her cheek against the top of your head. “remember how you saw me talking to tara about that girl i saw who i wanted to get to know?”

“um.. i think so. the one from the coffee shop?”

“exactly.” emily paused. “it didn’t work out, unfortunately, but that was partially because we hadn’t even began talking about this.” 

“so, as you know, we've been exploring the idea of… seeing other people.”  jj piped in, pausing to pick her next words carefully. “but we never fully explained to you what we meant by that.”

“we’ve been exploring polyamory.” it was emily’s turn to pause, gauging your reaction. “the two of us, sharing another partner.”

“cool.” you smiled, relieved it wasn’t something horrible. ”have you found anyone yet?” 

you could have sworn you saw both emily and jj visibly relax. 

“well, thats the thing. we’re not sure if they realized they were being flirted with… or that we’re interested in them that way.” 

you popped a grape in your mouth. “tell me everything, how does this work? wait! tell me about them!” 

emily smiled. “well, they’re easily one of our favorite people ever.” 

“have you known them long?” 

“about five years, give or take. em, when did we meet them?” 

“god, what was it… christmas of twenty nineteen, right?” 

interesting. you met the team in twenty nineteen after penelope dragged you to a girls night just after thanksgiving. what a coincidence. 

“they’ve been friends with us for a while. we’ve only recently started flirting with them about six months ago.” 

jj smiled fondly. “although like em said, we can’t tell if they’ve realized we’re flirting with them yet.”

“so they’re a bit aloof. that’s charming.” you smiled at them. “i’m so glad you guys found someone, i fully thought you guys were flirting with me these past few months.” 

there was an awkward pause. 

“wait… why are you… am i the someone?” 

emily cleared her throat, grabbing for her glass of wine. oh. 

oh.

“i am the someone.” 

“we like you, y/n.” jj grabbed your hand. “more than a friend. and i know that sounds weird, and you can say no- we’re not pressuring you to do anything or make any decisions tonight.” 

“i…” you paused. “how did you… are you guys okay? like, relationship wise?”

“we’re more than okay, i promise.” emily squeezed your other hand. 

“we’ve been talking about it, just the two of us, for a few months.” jj licked her lips. “the only other person who knows is tara, she’s gotten us in touch with a great support group that has everything we need to know about getting started.” 

“both of us realized we wanted something more, but didn’t want to end things at all.” emily explained. “we figured out that both of us had too much love to share with just one person, we wanted to share it with someone else.” 

“so… wait, can i ask questions?” 

“of course, babe.” 

“how would this work? the three of us?” you paused. “you’re… married.” 

“we know it won’t be easy, since you’ll never be able to officially legally be with both of us unless some magical law goes into effect that changes the world's view on polyamory. but, it would be like any normal relationship, but you would get both myself and jj. there would be boundaries and rules, and we would talk about those only if you want to give us a shot.” 

“we would want you to be as happy and relaxed and comfortable as you can be. everything is open to be talked about, especially when it comes to your comfort levels. and like we said, you can tell us to shut up whenever you want and we would.”

“and if i were to ask to kiss emily?” 

“then i would say yes, do it.”

“and the same goes for jj?”

“i would want you to do what makes you the happiest.” jj kicked emily’s shin. “i mean, i’d say yes.” 

“sorry i’m… i’m trying to wrap my brain around this. it’s being slow. you guys like me?” 

emily chuckled. “yes, lovey. a lot.” 

“more than you know.” jj nudged your shoulder lightly. “is that okay? that we both like you?”

“you know i’m queer, of course it's okay.” 

“but are you okay with that?” 

“why wouldn’t i be?” you looked between emily and jj. “have you gotten turned down before?”

“not in this aspect, no.” emily answered. “but yes, i have been turned down plenty of times.” 

“and i dated men in my past.” jj chuckled. “do with that information what you will.”

“yeah… men are stupid.” you chuckled. “okay so, hold on. i’d be dating both of you then?” 

“only if you want to.” 

“we’re not pressuring you at all. you can take some time to think about it-”

“- no no, it sounds really nice. dating both of you.” you smiled. “i just never thought…” 

“y/n, no matter what you think, you are loveable.” jj turned your face to look you in the eye. “you are loveable and you deserve the world.” 

“and we want to give you the world.” 

“we’d give you the universe, if we could.” 

“so what do you need from me?”

“your word.”

jj looked at you, a stern look overtaking her features. gods, did the room just get warmer?

“you tell us yes or no, and we go from there. we don’t want you to-”

“the answer is yes.” you stumbled over your words, jj’s look affecting you more than you thought. “i’d love to be your girlfriend.” 

both emily and jj let out a sigh of relief, bringing you in for a hug. it was real, it was happening. they didn’t read the situation wrong and you liked them back. you liked them back, and you said yes. 

“in that case, as our girlfriend, what do you want to do?” 

“can i kiss you?”

“of course you can.” 

you turned to jj. “and then can i kiss you?”

“please.” 

“then it's settled. i give you some smoochies, we binge ice cream and watch silly reality tv.” you smiled, nodding once. “the perfect night in.” 

emily and jj chuckled at your happiness, bringing you in as close as they could muster. you turned to emily first, placing a small peck on her lips to test the water before cupping her cheek, smiling into the kiss. you then turned to jj, who simply smiled widely at you before meeting you in the middle for the kiss. while it was an interesting scenario, you found yourself feeling comfortable. you were in the arms of two of the most important people in your life, and things were going to change. 

but they were changing for the better.

[deluxewhump]

The Scry

Ch 12: My Treat

CW: whumpee with powers, medical trauma mention, unmedicated noncon surgery mention, medical whump vibes but nothing explicit

Prev

Carlo was asked to dinner in a dimly lit downtown restaurant by the neurosurgeon who had slipped him a cryptic note two weeks ago.  It wasn’t their first meeting, but he had the feeling it was the important one, the one where he’d be asked if they were moving forward or not.

He’d looked the guy up extensively before agreeing to meet him that first time. He’d found his credentials, mentions of his attendance at Stanford and then Johns Hopkins, a photograph of him as a younger man in a white coat being awarded the Clinical Science Award for an abstract he’d published on spinal deformities in 1996. After that there were publications, an award in ‘08, a glossy feature in a local magazine about top physicians.

I can help, he’d said when Carlo finally called him one Friday night when Max and Ingrid were out. If it’s what you want. He hadn’t even known about the sale, that Spartan was shuffling them off to some other fate in a few short weeks. But it only made his offer sweeter. He could take the power out of him, extract it from his brain matter like a coiled snake. It was separate from anything else, he said, and he would still be perfectly himself without it, just sans scrying powers. With no special ability, he would be free. What use would he be to anyone? 

Carlo wanted desperately to ask Max if he thought he could get in legal trouble for this, if the company he’d been sold to or even the government could sue him, charge him, or worse. But Max didn’t know where he was. He’d left the office at midday while Max was at lunch with Eddie and Alex, leaving his own cryptic note behind. 

“Tell me about your expectations,” Dr Holstrom said in his calculated, velvet way. There was a hint of an accent on his consonants, almost undetectable. Carlo couldn't tell what it was anyway. Something Scandinavian?

He took a sip of the wine the doctor had ordered for them, a dry red that sucked his tongue and warmed his belly. “I want to be rid of all unnatural abilities,” he said plainly. “I want to be left alone.”

The doctor set his napkin onto his plate and sat back thoughtfully, apparently finished. Carlo took another bite of risotto. The food here was remarkable, unlike anything he’d ever remembered having. 

“Interesting you use the word unnatural.”

“Supernatural. Unexplainable. Whatever.”

The doctor smiled serenely at him. “In any event. You want to be unremarkable.”

“I don’t want to be an asset. If I am not a precognitive, they can’t claim me. No one can.”

“What will you be when I remove that ability for you?”

He frowned. “What do you mean?”

“How will you see yourself? You’ve been something coveted and studied much of your life.”

“And because of it I have no freedom,” he shot back, feeling his face grow hot with annoyance, possibly aided by the wine. For a man who claimed to have irreconcilable differences in opinion to Martin Olsen, he was really starting to remind him of him. “No autonomy. No life. I told you what it was like. And that wasn’t even half of it. I’ve been treated more like a human being by some guy who sells insurance than I ever was with the US Government.”

Dr Holstrom nodded sympathetically. “Oh, I know.  They aren’t allowed to treat lab mice the way they treat you precognitives, do you know that? Haven’t been for decades. And it’s not that they don’t know better. It’s that there’s no legislation to stay their eager little hands. Ethics boards slow progress. Bureaucracy clogs the machines. What I’m going to do to you will be absolutely painless, by the way. I thought you might ask, but you didn’t.”

He shrugged. Standard anesthesia didn’t work on precogs, it turned out. He’d never been told, but according to Dr Holstrom, that was the reason they didn’t give him any at the research facilities. This man claimed to have a solution, a secret sauce he’d put together himself that was going to make the whole thing pain-free. 

“With any luck, you won’t feel a thing. I wanted to reassure you of that right away. You have some hefty medical trauma, I assume, being what you are. I’d prefer you get no more of it from my care.”

Stubbornly, Carlo forked the rest of the risotto into his mouth. The memories this was threatening to dredge up were enough to put him off it, but it was delicious and expensive, and he wanted to finish. He’d thank this stranger once he proved to be telling the truth. 

“Carlo,” said the doctor, sitting back up so his elbows grazed the tablecloth. “I wonder if you shouldn’t tell your former user where you are… It sounds like you two were close, and I’m sure he’s worried about you.”

“I’m sure he is,” Carlo agreed, satisfied with his dinner and now determined to polish off the wine. The stem was so thin it was difficult to grasp, something that would surely break so easily it was impractical. Wealthy people love impracticality, he knew. They are so used to it they don’t even see how glaring it is. 

“Would you feel better if you called him and told him where you are? Told him who I am? I could even speak to him, if you like.”

Carlo shook his head. “I left a note.”

“A very unspecific note, isn't that right?”

“It’s really for the best. He’d try to interfere. He means well, but… he’d say this was dangerous, medically risky… he’d get lawyers involved and it would take too much time. And then it’d be too late. He can’t help it, it’s what he does all day.” Carlo shrugged, like it was neither here nor there to him how Max was about him.

In truth, it felt like a gunshot wound every time he thought of Max Kelly’s face, or voice, or house, or office. The thought of Max going home in the afternoons without him, of his bed lying empty up there in the little room under the eaves, of how he’d voluntarily left the only person in recent memory who’d ever cared about him, shown him kindness… and not even told him why.

“He’s protective of you.”

Carlo lifted his eyes over the table to Dr Holstrom’s. “Sure.”

“Well, maybe you’re right.” He smiled. “ Maybe it’s best that he doesn't know.” 

The subject was dropped with surprising swiftness.

“What do you really get out of all this?” Carlo asked.

“I told you,” the doctor replied, always so unruffled. “The chance to be the first to perform a groundbreaking new procedure. That’s not an everyday occurrence in my field.”

“Won’t you get in trouble? Don’t you have to get a bunch of approvals for something like that?”

“Better to ask forgiveness than permission. In the longer term, the public will side with us on this, and my actions will be seen as humanitarian. Heroic, even. It just takes time.”

Carlo wasn’t satisfied. He took another drink for fortitude, noticing it didn’t taste like much anymore. “That’s not all,” he accused.

Dr Holstrom smiled. “Nooo,” he crooned indulgently. “Not quite.”

Staff cleared their plates and left Carlo with the bottle. Dr Holstrom ordered them both espresso.

“Martin was an old friend of mine,” he said when the server left. “Until he screwed me over on an investment. I’m not proud of this, but it gives me great personal satisfaction to screw him over on one now.”

“The precogs belong to Spartan, not to Mr Olsen.”

“Martin has more pull than he’d let you believe. This project was his baby, he gunned for Spartan to purchase you, and I am assuming he brokered the sale when he decided he’d cashed in enough on you.”

Alex Clair had always suspected as much about Martin and the project. Carlo wished he could tell him he was right. “So he will take the blame when they’re one precog short?” he asked.

“Ideally.”

Carlo sighed. He contemplated the rest of the bottle but his espresso arrived and he thought better of it.

“So when do we do this?”

The doctor had put him up in a Hilton on the north side of town, near the hospital. That was evidently a coincidence, because the procedure was to be done at Holstrom’s own surgery center. Carlo had looked it up. The facility was an unassuming brick building in a medical park, in the middle of an affluent suburb. State of the art, it said on Google. Insurance and Medicare accepted.

“Whenever you’re ready to fully commit.”

“And what, you drive me back to the hotel after?”

“I thought it would be more appropriate for you to recover at my home. It’s not far from here. I’ll want to monitor you.”

“For how long?”

Dr Holstrom spread his hands. “Three days? A week? Depends on how you take it.”

“You know I can’t pay you, right?”

“Of course not. It’s not that type of arrangement.”

“I just wanted to make sure.”

“You’ve paid me tenfold, Carlo,” the doctor said with a smile that looked almost fond. He nodded at their server across the room for a check. “By the fate of our stars crossing paths.”

Carlo reached for some of the cash he'd pulled from his checking account before leaving Max, but Dr Holstrom was already slipping a card to the server.

"No," he said, waving dismissively. "My treat. Let’s go get your things and check you out of your room. It won’t be long now. You can stay with me.”

taglist

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[cutekittenlady]

Planes, Trains, and Autobots

Summary Fic Part 2

[Previous] [Next]

((Srsly I need a title for this thing. Willing to take suggestions.))

Opening up on the Maltos House where, after the end of the first season, Bumblebee and the other Autobots have started taking efforts to educate the Terrans about Cybertronian culture and history in more detail. Something Alex enthusiastically takes part in.

(Really this is just an excuse for me, as a fan, to import whatever aspects of the previous lore I find most appealing, as well as inserting some stuff of my own.)

While they are doing this who should finally appear?

Ratchet. Because Ratchet needs to be in Earthspark. I will take no arguments.

(Definitely prefer his characterization as an older more experienced cybertronian medic so kinda going off that here. Generally for this fan speculative Earthspark version of Ratchet I see him, as always, being the Autobots top combat medic as well as one of their most senior and experienced members with a long friendship with Optimus. LIke a lot of the other Autobots, hes accepted Megatrons change of heart but unlike the others he doesnt necessarily get along with him and is not above bringing up past grievances or criticizing Megs for current as well as past decisions hes made. Hes generally a good hearted if grmpy guy, and a highly ethical medical practitioner with strong views.)

Optimus had asked Ratchet to finally come and meet the Terrans both to further introduce them to more potential allies they could rely on and also because it was becoming increasingly important that they finally gain an understanding of how the Terrans health works so that they can best meet their needs if they're ever hurt or in need of any other kind of medical aide.

Cue some adorable moments of Ratchet putting the Terrans through various basic exercises and roping them in when they try to show off their abilities to him while he remains unfazed. The Terrans initially think this means Ratchet doesnt like them, but Bumblebee clarifies that Ratchet is just so used to the various powers and abilities of all the cybertronians hes treated over his millions of years of life that hes almost, quite literally, seen it all. Besides which hes far more concerned with figuring out areas of the Terrans health that might need his attention rather than anything else. Lol obviously cue Ratchet being grouchy and immediately undercutting whatever it is Bumblebees just said.

Eventually the subject of Conjunx Endura (Cybertronian concept like marriage which I believe was introduced in the IDW comics) somehow comes to the Terrans attention and they try asking the various Autobots (and maybe Megatron?) about it but the group gets flustered FAST and plays hot potato with the subject until it comes to Ratchet who takes up the subject while deriding the others for not being able to get ahold of themselves to actually explain one of their most important ceremonies to the kids.

((Note: As an inherently asexual species thats nonetheless capable of the full gauntlet of emotions while ALSO living for millions of years, I tend to h/c that to the cybertronians the concept of being in love and married is an incredibly intimate subject that, historically, most younger bots aren't taught about until they're considered experienced enough in other things to grasp the gravity of the subject. The Terrans are, at most, a year old or so. So them asking the various autobots about the subject is, socially speaking, like your toddler asking you where babies come from.))

Ratchet thinks if they're old enough to ask the question, they're old enough to get an answer. Still Dot and Alex insist on being present since a) despite his enthusiasm Alex has no idea what the Conjunx Endura is, b) the terrans are all their adopted children, and c) are themselves insanely curious about what could make the autobots and Megatron so flustered. Which is good, because Ratchet winds up needing their help as his explanation of the concept is incredibly dry and tends to reference a lot of aspects of Cybertronian culture the Terrans just dont know. Dot and Alex, as adults who happen to be married, are able to compare and contrast the concept to their own marriage to help the Terrans understand.

Ratchet does insist that the two are different in various ways though Dot is quick to hammer home that the important part is that its a special ceremony only to be launched with a special person you deeply love romantically. Something Ratchet agrees with and makes clear that while he wants the Terrans to understand what a Conjunx Endura IS, they're far far too young to pursue anything of the like and are definitely too young to learn about the Conjux Ritus, the set of rituals meant to tie two Conjux Endura together.

Alex and Dot thanks Ratchet for letting them learn about something so personal to the Cybertronians but do ask, out of curiosity, why the others were so flustered about it. Ratchet explains that because Conjunx are so personal many consider it an embarrassing subject to broach in mixed and professional company, and asking a bot you dont know really well about their conjunx or whether or not they have one is considered tactless and even rude. When asked why he isn't embarrassed about the subject, he explains carefully that he actually has a conjunx of his own and "after a million years together the embarrassment of the subject just sorta wears off" though he doesnt pursue the subject of his Conjunx any further.

Instead he changes subject and tell Dot and Alex to keep in mind that the Conjunx Endura can go wrong. On Cybertron there were bad actors who would lure unsuspcted bots into forming a Conjunx for favors, gain social standing, or other perks. At best they'd then abandon them allowing the victim to make an appeal and get the whole thing nullified, but at its worse it could trap bots into loveless onesided connections, or a toxic relationship.

Ratchet is surprised to find that Dot and Alex are shockingly accepting of this, saying that sadly marriage amongst humans can run much the same risk.

Alex even making a small comment like, "Just like my soap operas/stories!"

Again they thank Ratchet for telling them all this, and for looking after the kids by making sure they're informed.

Dot tries to prompt the kids to thank Ratchet only to discover most of the group had long since gotten distracted at some point in the conversation with only Nightshade and Jawbreaker really paying attention throughout the whole thing.

Alex tries to apologize but Ratchet responds with some dry humor that having at least 2/5 of young bots fully paying attention throughout the whole explanation is actually a pretty good turnout and that they can try explaining the whole thing to the others again "in due time."

They're then interrupted by the announcement that Breakdown has arrived at the Maltos house.

[oc-tournaments]

ROUND TWO - MATCH 10

IRIS vs TAMARA

IRIS: @emmetofthestars

TAMARA: @wokeuptraveledstraightintothesun

VOTE BASED ON THE INFORMATION BELOW CUT!!

Propaganda Content Warnings: War for IRIS, abandonment, experimenting and cult mentions for TAMARA.

IRIS:

PROPAGANDA: iris is doomed from the beginning, born a clone with no life experience besides violence and death in a pointless war. all the people in their team cannot help them either. in battle theyre often targeted and harrassed first of all their teammates because theyre the team's only spy, and they also spend a good chunk of time imprisoned and tortured by the other teams medic. theyre really vindictive and envious. also, god (me) likes to torture them for my own amusement its alot of fun. (their pronouns are any if thats important?)

THEME SONG:

TAMARA:

PROPAGANDA: let’s see, lost her family at 7 years old (none of them died there was just a house fire where she was put inside an iron stove to “protect” her by her father (her father doesn’t like her can you tell) and they left her there (the rest of her family thought she’d left already)), (un)fortunately picked up by a guy who took her to a very ethical lab where she was healed! And then forced through many painful experiments. Also she was the executioner for a Lot of people later in the lab time and she’s not even 16 yet. So she escapes at age 16 and spends a year with her girlfriend just existing and processing (poorly) what she had to live through and trying to acclimate to life outside of The Lab. Then her girlfriend (who is a cyborg fun fact) got a virus and so she had to be decommissioned which was not a good time for Tamara.

Other physical details: One of the experiments was a test in how high someone’s empathy can get and. Tamara’s the highest Kyne (the one guy who loves experimenting on her) got. So she’s having a Time. She has lost sensation in her extremities, her bones are weak as Fuck due to being part bird (because of very little bone marrow and airy bones), and she just always looks soggy regardless. Also she’s trans

So she just can Not catch a break and she unfortunately gets exploited by her need for parental love and general guidance in her life and joins a cult :( Like can you see the fact that she just cannot stop being kicked while she is down. (I love her to bits and she is my favorite oc I promise)

THEME SONG:

[stitching-in-time]

Voyager rewatch s5 ep8: Nothing Human

An episode that had an interesting premise, but faltered in the execution of it somewhat. While exploring medical ethics, the plot felt a little contrived in places, and some of the attitudes given to our characters were pretty ignorant and insensitive. (Which may have been the point, but it seems unlikely they could be that clueless, even temporarily.)

The allegory here is about whether it's justified to use medical research done by war criminals, in this case, the Cardassians, standing in for the Germans in WWII, but really for any doctors who experiment on vulnerable populations without their knowledge or consent.

It opens with a comedy scene of the crew miserably suffering through the Doctor's presentation of his away mission photos- though why they even go, let alone sit for 2 hours, I don't know. Sure, he's their friend, but honesty and setting boundaries are key in any relationship. We once again see a bit of a petty meanness the crew's treatment of each other, as Chakotay ignores the Captain's order to make an excuse to get her out of the Doctor's slideshow early. He even convinces Harry that the rest of the crew should have to suffer through it for as long as they did last time. He probably thinks no one should have their student loans forgiven because he had to pay off his own.

Eventually they encounter a shockwave from a disabled alien ship, and when they bring the surviving life form aboard, it latches on to the nearest person to feed off, in this case, B'Elanna.

This provides the necessity to recreate a holographic version of an expert on xenobiology to assist the doctor, though how Harry could create an entire interactive hologram as sophisticated as the Doctor in five minutes by just adding a personality subroutine to a database, when they literally had a whole comedy bit about how you can't actually do it that easily in an episode last season, idk. Seems like it would be a lot easier to just download his research into the Doctor's program, but then we wouldn't get to the debate about whether it's ethical to use a Cardassian war criminal's research if we can't see a a hologram of the guy for people to recognize. Also, why wouldn't they ask Ensign Wildman for help?? She's the ship's xenobiologist, surely this is one of the few times she'd have anything substantial to work on in her specialty, shouldn't they let her?? The writers don't hesitate to bring in Naomi Wildman every other episode, but they seem to forget her mom even exists after the episode 'Once Upon a Time', and it's a bit frustrating, since she's a great character and I'd love to see more of her doing actual Starfleet stuff and not just being Naomi's mom. But once again, that doesn't get us to the ethical conundrum, so it's overlooked. Stepping over such obvious plot holes to get to the desired end point feels sloppy, and takes me out of the story.

But anyway, they magically create a hologram consultant based on a Cardassian doctor, Crell Moset, and he seems friendly, and impressed with the Doctor, who immediately loves the guy for praising him and recognizing how great he is. They become a little mutual admiration society, and the Doctor is too swept away to realize that his new buddy isn't the most ethical dude in the galaxy. (Though the Doctor himself doesn't seem to so ethical either- when he argues the case for not killing the creature, he says that they should try to save it because what if the creature is an important person in it's society, as though that somehow made it's life of more value, to which Moset argues that they don't know that, what if it's a criminal psychopath, as if that somehow made it's life of less value. Both men placing the value of a living creature's life on what it may or not contribute to it's sociey is a very gross capitalist attitude that should certainly have ceased to exist in the post-capitalist Federation society. Moset's belief in that value system is what led him down the path of evil in the first place, so it's shocking to hear the Doctor agree with it, to any extent.)

When a Bajoran crewman recognizes that their holo-consultant is an infamous war criminal, who experimented on Bajorans without their consent, the Doctor refuses to believe it. The crewman was actually there, and saw his family members get killed by Moset, yet the Doctor keeps questioning whether he was remembering correctly, and even suggests that he's just projecting his hatred for Cardassians on to him, and it's truly a yikes moment. Not believing survivors is the worst thing you can do to them, and in fact adds to their trauma. Even though the Doctor wasn't activated yet during the Federation's conflict with Cardassia, and doesn't have firsthand knowledge of it, much less about the Bajoran Occupation, he should still have some knowledge of it from Starfleet databases, and he should have some kind of programming relating to trauma informed care as a medical hologram, and should know not to invalidate a trauma survivors experience to their face, because actually adds to their trauma. (And yes, even in the 90s psychologists knew that.) His awful behavior once again makes it really hard for me to like the Doctor. I guess they were trying to show how easy it is to be taken in by someone who has a pleasant manner to mask how evil they are, but still, once you've been told the truth, saying that stuff to anyone who had been through such horrors is just like, wow, how could any person with half a conscience say that to someone?

Once Harry and Seven do some research that supports the crewman's claims, the Doctor finally believes it. He confronts his fallen hologram bestie over his unethical practices (why?? he's not the real guy, he doesn't have knowledge outside of the Federation database he's based on, and none of his activities during the occupation are in there, otherwise his work wouldn't be in a federation database in the first place) and gets a run around about how ethics don't matter because ends justify the means, and they need his work now. The Doctor knows his practices are unethical, but is put between a rock and a hard place knowing he does need his research, even though B'Elanna refused treatment that involved Moset's work when she found out who he was.

Then there's a scene of the Bajoran crewman going to Chakotay to resign in protest of the program staying online, where Chakotay tells him that he can't do that, and he should let go of the past. (Chakotay? Really? A Maquis?? Who knows exactly what Cardassians did to people?? And who himself comes from a people who suffered at the hands of colonizers throughout their history?? You think he'd say that?? I disagree strongly. Wtf.) But the crewman says that they're just as bad as Moset if they use his research, and Chakotay apparently considers this for the first time. (Again, really??)

They apparently have a staff meeting to discuss what they should do- the Doctor knows Moset is a bad guy, but can't come up with an alternative in time to save B'Elanna, and wants to use him. Chakotay and Tuvok think behaving ethically is more important than saving B'Elanna's life, and Tom thinks they should do whatever they can to save her, ethics be damned, especially out in the Delta Quadrant where it's not setting any kind of precedent for anyone else to emulate. They argue round and round, but Captain Janeway once again has to step up and be the one to make the decision- she authorizes the Doctor to use Moset's program, and tells them to debate ethics later, when B'Elanna is safe. Tom thanks her as he walks out, but Janeway didn't do it for him, she did it for everyone, since the safety and well-being of the crew is her responsibilty, and ultimately, they would be worse off if B'Elanna died.

The Doctor assists Moset with the procedure, and while Moset wants to kill the creature to save B'Elanna, the Doctor finds a way to remove the creature without killing it (so did he even really need Moset at all?? Apparently not!) and the creature is returned to it's people.

The Doctor asks Janeway if he should delete Moset's program after the procedure, and she turns that responsibilty over to him to decide as the chief medical officer. Having already had to shoulder the responsibilty for using Moset's program over B'Elanna's objections, Janeway already has enough to deal with knowing how angry B'Elanna will be. (Though I could have done without Janeway and the Doctor's quips about B'Elanna's 'klingon temper' and how it's 'practically a chronic condition'. B'Elanna has every right to be angry in that situation, even considering that she wouldn't be alive to feel any way about it if her wishes hadn't been overruled. The characters, and the script, being tone police-y toward her in this situation is just racist, misogynist, and unnecessary. And a woman wrote this one too! Like geez, isn't bad enough when men do it to us? We have to do it to ourselves too?! Yikes.)

Janeway goes to see B'Elanna, and she's frankly kind of mean to B'Elanna in that moment. She orders her to stop being angry, which like, is not a thing, Kathryn, jfc. On the one hand, I get that it's a symptom of having to be the one to make all the decisions and shoulder all the burdens alone- Janeway is tired of it, tired of having to get criticized for not being perfect when she's the one responsible for keeping everyone alive and well, and she's the one shielding everyone else from having to make those hard decisions that might not make them feel good all the time, but are needed to get things done. I get that she doesn't want to be yelled at by someone whose life she just saved, but I also wish she could have been a little more compassionate to B'Elanna in that moment. She could have told her to feel however she wants but leave it at home when she comes back to work, or something. But even captains aren't perfect, and Janeway seemed less like a captain in that moment, and more like the head of a family who's burnt out from carrying everyone and everything singlehandedly, and who didn't have any more spoons to take care of someone else's feelings at that point. Which, while not how we'd want our heroic captain to act, is nontheless very real.

The Doctor rather unneccesarily goes to tell holo-Moset that he's decided to delete his program- we get a speech from Moset about how the Doctor is no better than him because he used his research, how he needs him, and he's a hypocrite for deleting him, blah, blah- but the Doctor finally seems properly disgusted with him, and deletes him despite his pleas and guilt tripping. It was a rather easy decision once Moset showed his true colors, (though why the hologram of him suddenly got meaner once he was found out, idk- the Starfleet database didn't have any info on the bad stuff he did to use in his program, but whatever, who cares if it makes sense I guess!) but at least the Doctor came to the conclusion that protecting the crew from an unethical war criminal who has no regard for the value of life is more important than having a buddy who strokes your ego. That's growth, at least!

Tl;dr: An episode with a good concept, though a contrived plot detracted from the central conversation about medical ethics that this ep was supposed to be about. But at the end of the day, the conclusion that each situation is unique and sometimes requires a pragmatic solution that doesn't always align with strict formulas made sense, and ultimately still affirmed the need to do better in the future once you know better.

[cee-grice]

Hello! I'm getting caught up on all your amazing asks here... But here's my pre-emptive Ask for Storytelling Saturday for next week:

Describe your WIP in bullet points so my ADHD brain gets it quickly!

hey hey Belle!! oh man, I also have to clean out my inbox, it's getting a bit embarrassing haha... I know you said this is a pre-emptive STS ask, but!.. I saw it and got excited lol, so you're getting it answered Now

so! my current WIP, When White Crows Cry, described in bullet points:

(this is gonna be long)

it's a science fantasy?? only instead of robots and space we have chemistry and pathology lol

also dark academia vibes

set in a secondary world reminiscent of 19th century-esque europe, only with modern advancements in science

the magic system is science-based - essentially, if you wanna manipulate the fabric of reality, you gotta. understand said fabric of reality

so, to cast a believable illusion you need to perfectly understand color and light and depth and all that (so you gotta be a kickass realism artist lol)

or, to change a glass ball into a gold one, you gotta understand the molecular composition of each material and know how to manipulate it so it would change forms

there's one tiny teensy issue with magic, though - it is a limited resource ahaha

ANYWAY that's the gist of it

main character - Quil, an exceptional transmutation mage who got exiled some years ago for performing human transmutation (very bad very taboo)

(he, of course, continues doing human transmutation)

(despite the Trauma)

the second most important character - Endra, who has this nasty magical parasite slowly eating away at his body and mind, and his only hope at a cure is... human transmutation

you can see where this is going

anyway so that's the Past timeline - Quil trying to figure out what's going on with Endra's body and finding a way to fix it

(this is also the Romance timeline lol)

we also have the Present timeline

and that starts with Quil getting revived a year after his death in the country he'd gotten exiled from

:0!

(that's literally the first chapter so it's not a spoiler lol)

anyway he gets offered a Deal - help his ex-mentor with her project that could potentially save magic, and in exchange he'd get amnesty

the issue? he really, really hates his ex-mentor

and he would have really, really preferred to stay dead

this whole magic dying thing is Not his problem, either lol

counter issue? the project concerns the same magic parasite that Endra had (has?), so it could put him in danger, and Quil quite literally would die again before he let that happen, so.

he agrees

(so that he could sabotage it lol)

but also! Quil doesn't know what happened with Endra post his death, so that's something he works on figuring out as well

(he gets far more questions than answers. where IS this guy)

anywayyy that's the gist of the story

now for the lightning round

this would be for you if any of this intrigues you:

highly questionable academic and medical ethics

characters forsaking morality to get what they want and losing sight of what truly matters

So Much Interpersonal Drama

no physical fights - a Lot of verbal fights

dealing with the horrors of resurrection

dealing with the horrors of facing your loved ones after they'd mourned you for a year

a cast of eccentric scientists

an obsessive, codependent queer romance between people who don't know how the other looks like

a lot of fucked up queer characters in general

an incredibly spiteful trans protagonist who just wants to be left the fuck alone but everyone insists on dragging him into their shit, so instead he's gonna Make them leave him alone

everyone wanting you to live apart from You

magic biology! magic chemistry! magic science! nerd shit!

anyway oof idk if this helps but omggg is it hard to explain a fantasy story quickly ahaha....

(this is the general tag for this wip so u can check out more stuff about it that's explained in a more cohesive manner lol)

[thefandomlesbian]

Hi! I really love your fic! I can see how much you put your heart and thoughts into your writing, it's really awesome to read.... I've been wondering what kind of stuff you read? If that's not too weird. I want to know if you have like, books or poetry or other type of writings that inspire you, or just, something that you really like to read. Thanks in advance!!

Hi! Thank you so much for asking!

I'm admittedly not as big of a reader as I was in school (who is?), but I've been reading more over the past two years since I moved out of my mom's house and now live in a much lower-stress situation. As for what I read, I have this peculiar habit of ordering very random things on niche topics from Thriftbooks when I get bored.

I don't generally read a lot of fiction these days; if I'm in the mood for a novel, I wind up rereading the Warriors books, Harry Potter, Narnia, or some of my old Stephen King favorites.

I mostly read nonfiction. I have a lot of outdated medical textbooks and clinical manuals (not new ones--I wouldn't recommend new books for anyone who isn't in med school, they're just too damn expensive, and for books less than 15-20 years old, the information is still up-to-date enough for a layperson to get a lot of benefit from them).

My current favorite author is Atul Gawande, a surgeon, who writes some absolutely baller informative works on surgical medicine for both healthcare workers and civilians. I needed to read The Checklist Manifesto for a scene I wrote in Not Bigger But Brighter where Wilson performs a surgery, with every intention of just browsing the book to find the checklist and utilizing that. I ended up reading the entire book, about 180 pages, over the course of three hours without even getting up to pee. All of his books are that compelling! They're absolutely amazing, I can't recommend his work enough. This guy can singlehandedly get almost any fiction reader to love nonfiction works.

I ended up buying a handful of works on contemporary Judaism to help with some important scenes in Brighter, all of which I enjoyed. I'm not really in a position to make recommendations on this topic as a non-Jew, so I don't have a lot to say, but I liked exploring the topic and expanding my knowledge to do more justice to Jewish characters in my fanfic.

I enjoy reading academic theory on feminism, lesbianism, introductory law/ethics, and basic philosophy. (I don't really seek an in depth knowledge on any of these topics and keep my reading fairly rudimentary, so I'm not a great source of information, I just like learning more and find it interesting.)

I have a number of poetry books, including Maggie Smith, rupi kaur, Charles Bukowski, and Richard Siken.

And, naturally, books on writing, character development, plot design, and more... plus I'm always rooting around in my dictionary and thesaurus on my desk during my writing, haha.

Most recently, I've signed up to receive emails from the Becker Hospital Review and JAMA, so I get to read some new medical journal publications for free, and I've learned a lot in my field. It's not all research on drugs and diseases (though that's perfectly fascinating on its own). There are riveting comments and replies, short memoirs, and even poetry on the art of medicine, as well as thoughts on how to improve staff experiences and reduce turnover and burnout among healthcare workers. I save almost every email I receive from them to read the enclosed publications later!

Anyway, this was a stupid long answer to a simple question. Sorry! I hope I answered it to your liking!

[numinati]

20 PATRON CELEBRATION DUMP

Hey y'all!!

Thank you guys so much for 20 members!! I know that might not sound like a lot, but I seriously never thought I'd get this far. Especially with the wigga. 😅

Seriously though, thank y'all so, so much for all the support you've given me. Here's to better things all 2024 and beyond!

To celebrate getting 20 members, here's a simple, miscellaneous dump. You get three cosmetics, a string mod, a career, a sim, and a build buy item. Enjoy!!

VICTORIA BROWS

PRETTY GIRL MOLES

FOUR HORSEMEN TATTOOS

- Hand traced from the OG pics

- Three swatches for each design

DIASPORA FLAGS

- 79 swatches, 6 dividers

- EA Mesh

PRETTY GOOD DISH OVERRIDE

Small string mod to replace the "fairly tasty dish" text in the moodlet.

VENEER TECH CAREER

Were you the child who gave their parents makeovers they didn't have the heart to tell you were bad? Do you want to feel as important as a doctor but don't want to waste your time on boring topics like gum disease? Are you a sadist?

If you fall into any - or all - of these categories, you'll love being a veneer tech.

Just because you ain't on some board doesn't mean you can't make board money! All you really need is some glue, gloves, and Invisalign, anyway!

Hell, if people cared about taking advantage of people, half the businesses out now would be closed. Shops shut all the way up. You deserve to get your bag too, right?

...maybe your first investment should be a lawyer.

This is a base game-esque career with four levels and two branches. Y'all know I am very new, and I couldn't find a tutorial on how to make active careers, so I apologize in advance for it being so bare. :(

I do hope y'all enjoy though!

Levels:

You just got your online certificate from the 6 hour seminar your favorite TikToker hosted and are now ready to service the streets with your dental expertise. The only problem is you don't have no expertise and are not a dentist.

But if that didn't stop your "mentor", why should it stop you? Try and make something shake for a little while. Worst comes to worst, you gotta flee the state... or the country...

...you really should look into that lawyer, friend.

Shade Room Famous

Due to the rampant amount of horror stories you have, your face is now plastered all over The Shade Room, the largest urban gossip blog in all of the US.

But to your surprise and mine tool - it seems like the saying about all attention is true, because people are now lined up your block waiting for the Smilez special.

Guess all you can do now is make sure your career lasts longer than your teeth.

Viral on TikTok

Fame looka nice on you, doesn't it? At least online fame does. After getting some shine on Shade Room, Hollywood Unlocked, The Neighborhood Talk, and even more, you've managed to rack up one million followers on TikTok. You're almost ready to release your own seminar!

Be careful, though, newfound fame brings newfound opposition. And with your multiple medical and ethical violations it won't take much to get unplugged.

The Plug

After all of the hours of hard scamming you put in, you've done it. You've got the fame, the fortune, the mid-tier rapper/influencer connections, and about 21 different YouTube videos about your crimes.

The only thing to do now is sit back, count up, and not get indicted.

And hey, if that doesn't work? At least you're making enough for a one way to Jamaica.

Branches:

Celebrity Scammer

Now, about that mid-tier clientele you had...

They are all big time now. And so are you! You've 'hustled' and 'grinded' your way to the big leagues.

No more barbershops. You're doing Future's teeth in the back of your mansion. Their teeth may decay, but your star certainly isn't!

It doesn't even matter how many people say you scamming. Or how many horror stories have turned into full on nightmares.

You're the Dr. Miami of teeth now. Can't nobody say anything about that!

Seminar Leader

Now, about that seminar you said you were gon start...

You did. In fact, the only two options on your website are to book and to, well, book.

In doing so, not only have you managed to stack up even more, but now you look wise and charitible to 5% of Instagram users. Win win!

It doesn't matter if most people think you still scamming. Or the fact you don't send out all the invites to people who signed up.

You're a business person now. Can't nobody say nothing about that!

HALANI HAYNES

(romantic- self assured - hot headed)

Only one outfit is done, the rest are an underwear set!

you can download all of this on my Patreon:

[iliiuan]

Babylon 5 S1E9 Deathwalker

My favorite psychic. And my favorite asshole politician.

The hour of scampering. Interesting time keeping system there.

What are you up to, Kosh?

Hmmm. Snake lady does not like the lady with the wrinkled forehead.

Delenn vs Na'Toth in response to mortal enemy: Na'Toth kicks more ass, Delenn does better convincing others to support her.

Do their spots turn gray, Garibaldi, or are you projecting?

The Dilgar sound like some sort of nazi society. Fitting, then, that they all died. I guess that reinforces the show's claim that genocide begets the death of the genociding culture. (What happens when two groups are both set on genociding the other?)

Hello. You seem familiar. (She's a Superman villain, turns out.)

Huh. I guess we're exploring medical ethics this week.

G'Kar is ever the diplomat. Trying to play as many sides as possible. I love that for him.

So people can just rent out psychics? Gives me damane vibes: the person with the powers can't be trusted to use them, but other people can be.

A three edged sword doesn't sound very effective my dude.

Dilgar. I feel like there's a joke there, but it's not coming to me.

Chon'kar. Nemesis? Blood feud? I like it.

Everyone wants Deathwalker's ill-gotten biomedical weapon fountain of youth.

"You shouldn't listen to rumors." That's rich, Sinclair. Listen to the rumors, Londo. It's important.

G'Kar my man, you got outplayed there. Deathwalker is so evil.

Oh yeah. Unethical medical experimentation being excused because the result is valuable provides such tasty discourse. I like that Garibaldi is taking the view that lady is unforgivable and her serum is not valuable actually thank you very much.

Crimes against sentience! Perfection!

Sorry, Earth. You don't get to protect the fucking war criminal. Well fucking played, G'Kar.

What ARE you up to, Kosh?

I guess only the superpowers get votes? Seems like a bad system. Ah. The League of Non-aligned Worlds gets a single vote. They deserve better representation.

The cowardice displayed by every major government is realistic and disheartening.

Wow. Ivanova is having a really bad day. OMG she really pulled the customer service voice and fake smile. I love how she played all of the angry customers against each other. Pure genius.

Kosh wants something from Winters. Oh. Her thoughts, apparently. Poor Winters. She doesn't deserve psychological torture.

It is fair to let Deathwalker produce her serum? Perhaps, but why would you trust this woman? Free, she can manipulate others into fulfilling her twisted desires. In a position of authority, she can stall and make promises to keep herself alive. Nothing good will come from this plan.

And there's the catch. You get immortality by killing other living beings. But that's always true? Can't you get it from plants? Does it have to be other sentient beings? She betrays her evil nature in her assumptions.

I... disagree, Sinclair. Keeping her alive to brew her potion is a stalling tactic at best. And James Holden taught us what happens when you leak random information.

JUST KILL HER NOW SINCLAIR. Come on goody two shoes. You can do it.

I guess the Vorlons killing her prevented anyone else from having culpability, so that's probably for the best. Kosh is such a dick, though. "You are not ready for immortality." Ok wise guy. Is anyone ever?

Poor Winters has PTSD from reading a psychopath's mind. And Kosh has some weird leverage over her now, though to what end is anyone's guess.

[presidentbungus]

I don’t feel like writing something new but I don’t think I ever posted this on tumble so here’s the thanksgiving fic i wrote last year lol. pretend I just wrote it REALLY REALLY fast in the last 10 minutes, capiche? you got it

team fortress generic thanksgiving fanfiction. 1494 words

ao3

Thanksgiving here’s not really like it used to be back home. Dell used to help around with cooking, sure, but he never really found himself in front of the stove for three straight hours as he tried to pull together a feast from, relatively, scraps. One man here eats enough for nine, times nine because there’s eight other guys besides him, and Sniper and Scout are so skinny he’s not sure how they even fit that much food in their stomachs—

Agh. Timer. Engineer stops it and tugs the pan of candied pecans out of the oven—a Thanksgiving tradition that had to be abided by, naturally, even if it used up most of the sugar stores. Demo’s currently at the market in Teufort for more, anyway, plus bread for stuffing and eggs and packs of gravy and about a dozen more sticks of butter and Engineer told him not to but realistically he’s going to come back down with a few crates of beer too, which Dell has prepared for by having a few now since they’ll be very restocked later.

Scout comes over and tries to snatch a nut off the tray and he promptly drops it on the floor and complains about it being hot, to which Engineer says it just came out of the oven and what did I tell you you were supposed to be doing?

Um, Scout replies, sucking on the tip of his thumb. Mashing potatoes I think.

You think? Get on, it’s 4:00 already and we don’t even have the turkey out. Scout gets on. Earlier today he walked into the kitchen and did that little laugh-snort he does when he’s about to smartass up to ya, and he said Engie looked like a housewife in that dumb little apron of his, cookin’ along. And Dell turned around and said ain’t nothin’ wrong with housewives, me or my apron, boy, they’re all important things. And he’d been planning to rope Scout in anyway—important to give him responsibilities, he’s young enough that kinda thing’ll benefit his work ethic later (and also he didn’t want to have to finish the rest of this alone), so he waved at Scout and handed him the spatula and told him to stir up the cranberry sauce while he got to work on the green-bean casserole.

What else has to be made at this point? Cranberry sauce, potatoes, nuts, one bowl of stuffing while he waits on the rest of the bread to get here, that’s all done, and the sweet potato and green bean casseroles, respectively, are working out in the oven. Soldier’s out in the backyard smoking the turkey—smoking probably being a weak word for whatever he’s doing, but that’s why Engineer has another one prepared to go in the oven whenever he hears something explode outside, and Demo’s gonna make a cheesecake, and Heavy’s in the rec room waiting to take the place of Scout and make whatever he said he'd make; soup or something, probably. And Pyro’s also gonna make some kind of baked dessert too, come to think of it (at least given whatever they attempted to communicate to Engineer a few minutes ago)—and last year Medic brought some oddly-shaped pink thing that bled and squelched when you cut into it and nobody asked about that or, in extension, took a bite, so he’s probably not gonna be helping this year. 

Scout taps Engineer’s shoulder and says he’s done, and he goes to examine the bowl and it’s actually well-mashed, which is certainly a welcome surprise—Dell wonders if he’s done this before. He thanks Scout, says he doesn’t need anything else for now but keep an ear out, and Scout legitimately breaks out at a full sprint leaving the kitchen and almost throws the bowl onto the floor but Engineer barely manages to save it as Heavy falls in right after him.

Dell says hi. Heavy says hi. Heavy says: what is occasion?

Thanksgiving, I guess. Pilgrims or something. Dell takes off the glove on his gunslinger and dips a metal finger into the mashed potatoes and licks it off and runs it under water, muttering: It doesn’t really matter.

But there is feast?

Heavy asks this question every year, always sounding very worried. Yeah, Engineer always says. You wanted to make stew or something?

Yes. Recipe of family. Sisters say it is very delicious.

A glance at the egg timer by the stove—eleven minutes, around. Enough to get out of the heat and sit down and maybe catch a bit of the Macy’s parade if anyone bothered to record it. 

He steps back and rubs his face and smiles. Well, I’ll be back in about ten. The kitchen’s all yours before then.

————

Something about seein’ the spread all neat-like down the table—that’s when it clicks, that’s when it becomes worth it—the whole day and the sweltering heat and his disintegrating knees and all. Especially when Sniper and Spy come and sit down, after everyone else, but it still feels like such a victory when they otherwise wouldn’t come to investigate if the whole base went and burned to the ground.

The food isn’t great, which was mostly expected—what remains of the turkey is charred and nearly wholly inedible (though Soldier insists on pushing a big helping of it on everyone who doesn’t manage to snap up their plates in time), and everything else is mainly a fault of the dirt-cheap ingredients used in the making—Heavy’s soup is delicious as usual, however, and is the first thing to vanish from the table as everyone scrambles to get a few bowls of it before it’s gone.

Things calm down after that. Idle chatter, lots of beers being passed around (Engineer’s prediction about Demo’s grocery shopping habits was wholly correct); Demo disappears into the kitchen for a bit, along with Pyro, and twenty minutes they come out with a cheesecake and brownie tray respectively and everyone cheers. The cheesecake is unfortunately dropped on the floor in the resulting wrestling match between Heavy, Soldier, and Demo (Scout will later say he was a part of it and basically won, though everyone remembers him just kind of standing at the edge of the conflict and looking vaguely afraid), but thankfully Demo is able to guard it well enough that no one stomps on it and the five second rule exists for a reason and a slice is still divvied out to everyone who still has even the slightest trace of an appetite.

It’s just the photo after that—Engie insists, despite a slew of protests. Somethin’ to send home to their families (or hang on the fridge to embarrass everyone for years to come; same difference). Spy makes himself scarce but Soldier has the nose of a bloodhound and he comes back ten minutes later with Spy in tow, looking somewhat ashamed of himself. The whole room smells like sweat and meat and the slightest hint of chocolate, and everyone looks about ready to pass out—and is it really a holiday photo if that’s not the case? Corralling everyone together and getting them to sit still and hold some semblance of civility for at least like five seconds takes another twenty minutes since Demo and Soldier get in a wrestling match every ten seconds and Spy keeps trying to get out of things and Engineer puts Heavy in charge of watching him to make sure he doesn’t cloak and run and nobody ever sees him again. Medic and Sniper sit in the corner and talk quietly. Engineer brings them up as an example of what actual adults act like and then Scout says how he can still feel a bird flapping against his ribcage sometimes and the whole room goes silent and maybe it’s time to get the photo, come to think of it.

Scout is making a face and Soldier’s head is shoved into Demo’s armpit and Spy is gone and Sniper looks like he’s dozing off and Medic has got himself covered in blood again for some goddamn reason and there Engineer is, in the center of it all, grinning as a cyclone hurricane happens behind him. The photo’s terrible, there’s no real doubt about that, and he’s probably gonna have to retake another one at some point where everybody’s not already fed up with each other, but Engineer still finds himself smiling every time he looks at it regardless—this is miles more accurate than the stock preposed all smiles holiday card kinda picture will ever be, anyway. They're kooky idiots, they are, who are incapable of things they probably should be wholly capable of, but at the end of the day they're his kooky idiots and he can't help but feel pride for each and every one of them.

Yeah, not much like back home in the slightest. Engineer wouldn’t really have it any other way

[timeclonemike]

"Alright, let's get this peace treaty shindig going! I've never done this before so playing it by ear. Territory first. The land of Veck and the cities of Aludra and Horm, turns out my followers really wanted to not be oppressed by the Inqusition, so you guys gotta pack up those cathedrals and go home. Stained glass and all. Fair is fair, we will withdraw forces and civilian workers from the occupied territories of Morningsburg and pull everyone back to Veck. Okay, reparations. Lots of damage on both sides, lots of life lost, things can be rebuilt but those who died can't be brought back... except for me obviously... so I'm thinking we put our heads together and form a multinational alliance of construction and civil engineering services. First priority is roads and railroads and docks, get the logistics up to move everything else we need to rebuild. Exact priorities will be different everywhere but that will also let us move relief supplies. Food, drinking water, medicine, that kind of thing. I amassed quite the substantial fortune before my assassination and I'm willing to put forward most if not all of that as a good faith gesture to secure the resources we will need. Long term peace provisions, my people have their own concerns and those are important, my second in command and his entourage can itemize those for you, as for me all I want is a concession from the Republic that the Prime Minister was ethically and legally at fault for ordering my assassination and my reprisal as an undead wraith is justified under the 'Stand Your Ground' law you folks love so much. That's it. Good so far?"

"...can you still cause nuclear explosions with your mind?"

"Killing me the first time did not take that power away. And bringing me back didn't restore it, either. I was undead, not dead-dead. Sweeping away everyone's nuclear arsenal and fleets wasn't my opening act of reprisal, that was me blowing off steam after getting my skull exploded. That should not matter to you unless you're trying to rebuild nuclear programs behind everyone's back, in which case, way to tip your hand. In other words, that's always going to be on the table. But enough about me, let's talk about you guys. Maria, legendary Hero, love your work. Doctor Ashton, don't blame you for bailing, things got really extra for a while there. Sir Howe, sorry about your sister, my medical team is doing their best to fix everything that can be fixed. Erin, I love airships and yours is one of the best I've ever seen. Congrats on the top surgery by the way. Julius... actually I don't know anything about you. Awkward. How's the wine? And the fried chicken? Dad's recipe. The chef had a devil of a time finding the spice mix in a war zone."

You have failed and your foes have achieved their long sought goal of reviving their God-king. Everyone expected him to lead the final assault and solidify his rule once and for all. Turns out, he’s actually a pretty chill guy and immediately calls the whole thing off.

[checkoutmybookshelf]

Chaol's Desert Adventure

Ok, this is going to be the MOST "your mileage may vary" review ever. I'm admitting to bias right up front because I was SO GROUCHY that I had to slog through Chaol's Desert Adventure after the end of Empire of Storms, and quite frankly this book could have been an email. There were exactly three plot-relevant things happening, and the rest of it was following characters I was never terribly invested in anyway. This book is not bad, strictly speaking, but I was mad about it. So let's briefly talk Tower of Dawn.

Hey, so I'm about to SPOIL THIS BOOK below the cut. This is your SPOILER WARNING.

The three plot relevant things are as follows:

Maeve is a goddamn VALG QUEEN

Nesryn managed to succeed in recruiting a bunch of absolutely-not-Tolkien-Eagles to the war and Chaol and Yrene solidified an alliance with Antica

Apparently a magically gifted healer can exorcise Valg demons and princesses from people.

All of which are good to know and substantially affect the overarching narrative and the shape of the war. Maeve being a goddamn Valg queen in particular is big...but mostly because Aelin is EXTRA SCREWED given that she's currently in Maeve's hands. The extra armed forces and the fact that Valg possession can be undone are also great to know and will absolutely be important...in the next dang book.

So...as for the rest of this book. We have basically two couples we follow: Chaol and Yrene as well as Nesryn and Sartaq. So let's just take them in order.

Chaol and Yrene

Ok guys, I LIKE medicalish stories. And I LIKE angst. This had stuff that I generally would have enjoyed, but...I just didn't care? Like I'm glad Chaol had his come-to-Jesus with his self-loathing and trauma--lord knows he needed to--but I did not care. He has been on this boat since book 3, and while he probably DID actually need a book to deal with his shit, but it took the overall series pacing and rand it directly into the ground at a point where as a reader, I was actively resentful of the digression.

There is every possibility that I would enjoy this WAY more had I not been chomping at the bit to get back to Aelin. But the journey that Chaol and Yrene go on is...honestly one I've read before. PLUS, I'm not sure I love the whole "fall in love with your healer" storyline. Medical ethics and medical power dynamics are fraught on a good day, and like...that's the LAST situation you want to bring sex into. And for all Yrene's insistence that she can and will remain professional...sorry hon, but from MINUTE ONE with Chaol, there was no professionalism. We just kind of moved through one kind of unprofessional behavior to another. And as a professional, Yrene should have KNOWN BETTER than to use Chaol as a teachable moment without his permission. If I were the Healer on High watching that shit, I'd have pulled Yrene up on that. Expeditiously.

But instead the Healer on High is just like, "She means well." Which...for crying out loud. Come on.

AND ANOTHER THING: I'm fine with the loophole to keep Chaol alive at the end of the book. There is even something romantic about the two of them being basically one and Yrene willing to pay any price to keep him alive. We also get some nice growth from Chaol about living with a disability. All that said, though? The "if one of you dies, the other one dies" thing is JUST BARELY less stupid than Feysand's death pact from A Court of Silver Flames. Like the sheer lack of agency involved is its only saving grace, because if they'd WILLINGLY CHOSEN THIS I'd have been so done.

Nesryn and Sartaq

I...don't really have anything to say about this one. Nesryn breaks up with Chaol via text, and honestly good for her because she deserves better. Sartaq is fine. I had zero emotional investment in these two. Again, your mileage may vary, I just didn't connect with Nesryn, and while I'm happy she has a better boyfriend and her family is safe, I had no other emotional connection to them. There wasn't even anything ethically dubious to be mad about like with Chaol and Yrene.

The pacing and technical construction of the relationship was competent and fine, and if you're a Nesryn stan, you would likely really enjoy this. It just...wasn't for me at this point.

Other Stuff

So... this book. This book does that "generic foreign" thing with Antica where a metric ton of Asian and desert cultures are imported wholesale and flattened into one "generically Asian desert" culture and...yikes. Like, the backstory is basically just Genghis Khan and the Mongols, there were Tibetan influences, Egyptian influences, and some stuff that even felt vaguely Moroccan. Like...we just took a bunch of cultures and mashed them up and flattened them. It's not great, and it really doesn't feel respectful in terms of cultural detail use. It does feel like SJM went "ooh, these feel unusual and foreign, so I'm dropping them into this book!" Which... *baps her with a rolled up newspaper*

Chaol's injury and recovery was handled...better than I expected. There is real growth and the move from self-loathing to self-acceptance is done fine. I particularly liked that Shen was there, and that Chaol had a little moment of internalized ableism and Shen called it out. It went objectively too quickly, but the peer support that Chaol accepts after realizing that Shen uses a prosthetic arm felt on point and better done than I would have expected.

SJM does kind of...have her cake and eat it too as far as "kill or cure" goes, because Yrene does heal his broken back, he walks again. But then the Valg princess breaks it again, he literally dies, and then comes back with some level of physical impairment. Which...y'all...it was fine as a dramatic climax, but way to cover all three possible options in about as many pages to avoid anyone yelling about how this was wrapped up. I could go into this more, but I'm not that invested in this book and this character. She did all the things and ended it with a wedding. Yaaaaaaaaaaaay...

Now if y'all would excuse me, I'm going to go inhale Kingdom of Ash, because I'm not done being mad about the Empire of Storms cliffhanger.

[llycaons]

I'm reading an article on organ donation and I'm kind of mad at it

Six times had the hour hand on the clock moved – and she had lain dead. Now she had re-entered the world of the living. I would support her blood pressure and pulse. I would make her blood bright red with oxygen.

crnas don't do that? he's completely overdramatizing and overestimating his role here. the pts are hooked up to oxygen and medication to support cardiovascular function and organ oxygenation continuously from the instant they're admitted with the injuries that would render them brain-dead. is he trying to make himself seem more significant in this process than he actually is or embellishing for dramatic effect? I can absolutely guarantee this patient has been on medical support that 'made her blood red with oxygen' before coming into this individual's care

also he keeps using the word 'harvest' when we're really trying to move to 'procure' for obvious reasons. AND he's talking about replacing surgeons with AI robots which seems extremely unlikely given how different and up to carefully trained judgement each case is. even current robot cases are still controlled by surgeons who are in the room, and there's always a surgeon and a tech at the field just in case. it's absolutely unthinkable that no living human would be in the room at ALL. is this guy, perhaps, a complete fucking idiot?

also the line "Nature will never permit anyone to know the exact point where brain death becomes real death" pisses me off because brain death IS real death! that's an extremely important part of the education my unit tries to do and it's I think it's unconscionable that a health care professional would continue to perpetuate this misconception! the author writes like his pt died in the OR, but she died hours before then. tbf that's a misconception so prevelant that we get people at work treating us like shit because they think WE KILL PEOPLE but like in that case do yur fucking research before fearmongering? who allowed this asshole to write a bioethics article?

in fairness a lot of organ donation is ethically tricky and there are many JUSTIFIED concerns as well as misconceptions about organ donation and it's just so frustrating that this idiot is so worried about the completely unsubstantiated fear of AI SURGEONS that he's just making it all sound like a hellish nightmare instead of a relatively commonplace procedure that, like all surgeries, depend entirely on who's performing it.

btw this is mostly just me venting I really don't want to talk about work on here unless we're mutuals. overall I'm proud of what I do but there's always room for nuance especially in the hellscape that is the american healthcare system etc. etc. this person just wanted to fearmonger about a completely nonexistent problem of AI surgeon I think akjshdkjas

[w-ht-w]

friendships of virtue

I think the best friendships are one where you challenge and refine one another’s worldviews to be more accurate and compassionate. And then help each other to realize your ethical aspirations. That’s what I think of, when I think of the friendship between Dr. Paul Farmer, Dr. Jim Yong Kim, and Ophelia Dahl. They used their medical knowledge to expand medical care to people in impoverished nations.

PAUL: I met Jim Kim in, on a snowy night in December 1983.

JIM: Paul was dressed almost like a dandy. He had very fancy clothes and a nice little scarf, and I was only later to learn that he’d borrowed every bit of it from from someone else.

JIM: We began talking and I thought -- wow, this guy is really impressive. Because he could participate in the seminar, y’know, as if he was one of the professors.

PAUL: Jim and I clicked. We were in the same training program, that’s when we really became very close friends.

JIM: Paul and I both agreed that we were going to medical school for reasons of social justice.

JIM: Now -- let me just stop for a second -- this is really important.

ARCHIVAL

PAUL: Shall we?

JIM: During medical school we spent many, many late nights - Paul and I and Ophelia - talking about fundamental questions: what is the nature of our responsibility in the world? Is there something like an area of moral clarity?

ARCHIVAL

PAUL: There’re all these ideas - for example, appropriate technology. I mean, basically in the end they’re all used to punish poor people, just like every other ideology is by and large. So the appropriate technology means as, as Fritz our boss says, he means ‘That means shit for poor people and good things for rich people.’

OPHELIA: It was during these late night conversations, that I started realizing that these larger forces had an enormous and terrible impact on the people that we had gotten to know in Cange.

a late-night discussion between Farmer and Kim on how much time is wasted to ensure political correctness. “It’s a very well-crafted tool to distract us,” Kim griped. “A very self-centered activity. Clean up your own vocabulary so you can show everybody you have the social capital of having been in circles where these topics are talked about on a regular basis.”

Kim’s frustration with the medical establishment was equally severe. Partners in Health focused on the toughest diseases to treat -- AIDS, tuberculosis -- in the poorest, hardest-to-reach corners of the world. To do so, it had to battle the prevailing wisdom, which held sway even among many in the aid community, that it wasn’t worth expending scarce resources to treat those diseases in those areas because the efforts would not be successful.

Atul Gawande, the surgeon, writer and public health researcher, worked with Kim and Farmer at Harvard Medical School. He recalls that Congress “held hearings where they would bring out doctors saying these patients don’t have watches, you have drugs they need to take four times a day, you can’t have treatment in places where you don’t even have watches. What Kim and Farmer did was prove them wrong on a localized level. And then what Kim did was figure out how to scale that.”

Gawande describes Kim as the operational genius of Partners in Health. “He’s sort of a natural executive in a certain way that Paul Farmer is not. Farmer is a saint and a visionary. But Jim could see the vision and turn it into action.”

“At some point, you have to decide whether you’re going to keep throwing your body at a problem, which is what I’ve always done,” [Kim] told the New York Times. “You realize that one person can’t do that much. So what I want to do is train an army of leaders to engage with the problems of the world, who will believe the possibilities are limitless, that there’s nothing they can’t do.” (2)

1. Bending the Arc documentary, transcript

2. https://www.washingtonpost.com/blogs/ezra-klein/post/in-kim-an-activist-to-lead-the-world-bank/2011/08/25/gIQAXmc0VS_blog.html

3. https://www.vox.com/22949148/paul-farmer-death-global-health-hiv-tuberculosis-social-change

[tboykrillin]

[ID: Tier list of all the TF2 mercs.

Sniper: Hardcore about his duties. Can wait patiently for a target for hours. Famously has an entire motto about the professionalism of hired killing. Only really wacky traits are overbearing parents (not his fault) and throwing pee at people (simply pragmatic with what he's got)

Spy: Arguably has a more serious attitude about his job. Docked a few points, however, for fraternizing with his enemies' mothers, choosing not to remain invisible or disguised while killing his targets, and otherwise not performing as covertly or efficiently as he could.

Heavy: An overall intelligent and no-nonsense man, whose presence alone may motivate and inspire his team's cooperation. Only real character flaws are loving his guns too much, and slipping into bloodlust during combat. At least raw passion makes for strong work ethic

Scout: Simply capable at his job. Not concerned for efficiency or formality, acts arrogant and thinks he can do whatever he wants, but at least he'll do what he's asked. Probably the kind of retail guy that handles the crazy customers that nobody else wants to

Engineer: Mild undertones of Mad Scientist Energy. Will mutilate his own body to make his job easier, but is at least courteous and mature enough to put down everything he's doing for important business, such as, say, researching whether or not his coworkers have Teleporter Cancer

Demoman: Personally /completely/ irresponsible, insisting on handling dangerous equipment while blackout drunk. Yet still somehow retains such an incredible grasp on his field of expertise as to not be killing himself or his coworkers constantly. Work harder not smarter I guess

Soldier: Somehow manages to be just as unhinged and reckless as Tavish while /sober/. Treats his discharge like a suggestion and passively commits war crimes with every step he takes

Medic: Probably banned from practicing medicine in 6 out of 7 continents. Antarctica is on thin ice.

Pyro: Physically present \End ID]

got inspired to make a TF2 Mercenary Professionalism Tier List the other week, and decided to properly chart it