#but guess it deserves it by virtue of existing

[une-erreur-inconnur]

So after fighting for months to include an ad banner in the game I've made I suddenly realised that for a first time project it was...not worth it at all? :'D

Long story short:

I published Bomb di fé on itch.io

Ad free

It's a silly little text based game that I made to fiddle with phone input (like gyroscope and compass). I WAS going to publish it on google play but I made the mistake of submitting the ad version first, and now Google don't believe me when I try to say I removed ads from it TT even worse it won't let me delete the ad version I already submitted. So until I resolved that it's just available on itch.io

It's an android game, from what I tested it looks low-key ugly on tablet but still works :') small victories

[notmeowse]

That AMA marks the end of Dragon Age.

In my opinion.

I'll start by saying that I have played all 3 of the previous games repeatedly, I've loved the series for 15 years, more than half my life. These games inspired me to become a writer and they've shaped a lot of my tastes and interests in shows and writing -- to say they were formative is kind of an understatement. Don't want to go on and on about how much I loved them, that's not the point here.

I didn't care for Veilguard for pretty much all of the reasons people have already discussed at length on Reddit and Tumblr. The writing is comprehensively bad, the romances are easily the worst Bioware has written by pure virtue of having the most cookie-cutter pacing and shallow characterization I've seen across their games, the lore has been shafted in every direction, and the nuanced storytelling and roleplay I came to expect from the series has been taken out back and shot in the head.

All, apparently, in the name of a "clean slate". It seems to me that, rather than familiarizing himself with the existing lore of the game he took the creative reins on, Epler clearly had a vision for Dragon Age (or perhaps a different IP entirely) in his head that he decided to transplant into the game (and possibly Trick? But they've said so little beyond defending their work that I can hardly theorize what direction they were coming from). That being a sanitized, wildly self-contradicting, morally absolute shitshow focused on distancing itself from the previous games as much as possible. Now, I know it's unrealistic to blame one person entirely, and I don't blame him entirely. Corinne was there. Trick was there.

But if it wasn't already evident from the numerous interviews Epler's given on the game as well as his participation in the Q&A's (while the actual lead writer of the game has been completely absent in not just the marketing, but in most fan-related interaction pre and post-launch outside of BSKY), this AMA seems to have confirmed, more than anything else, that Epler doesn't understand the game nor does he understand its audience. Neither does Corinne Busche, who despite being Game Director for only the last two years of development, has been answering lore questions a) like she has any fucking clue and b) like she thinks Dragon Age is a cozy-gamer IP, meant to appeal to people that want uplifting stories with uncontroversial characters, morally upright heroes, and unquestionably evil villains.

So as of today's AMA, I think I've finally had enough. We're just outright retconning the lore in Reddit AMA's now, I guess. Among other things. I'll provide a few examples, just so we're all on the same page.

This was part of Epler's response to why Solas didn't have his cult following in the game (insert "We Kind of Forgot" meme here):

Solas' experience leading the rebellion against the Evanuris turned him against the idea of being a leader. You see it in the memories - the entire experience of being in charge ate at him and, ultimately, convinced him he needed to do this on his own. And his own motivations were very different from the motivations of those who wanted to follow him - he had no real regard for their lives or their goals. So at some point between Trespasser and DATV, he severed that connection with his 'followers' and went back to being a lone wolf.

The fact that this (the not caring bit) directly contradicts the writing in the actual game is absolutely INSANE to me, moreso than the lack of Solas's spy network (which he apparently carried with him for 10 years only to conveniently drop right before the ritual? Because he clearly had them research Rook?). But in regards to the not caring -- here's a line from Solas's memory of killing Mythal in Veilguard, which. I'll get to Mythal in a minute:

Why should I not tear down the Veil, and bring back immortality to all the elven people? They deserve it!

Which is it? Does Solas care about the people he's saving (the venn diagram of people he's saving vs. the people following him is surely a circle, i.e. elves) or not? Does he even care about the spirits trapped behind the Veil anymore or is it just convenient to abandon them and have him only care about elves, now? What happened to saving The People? What happened to him not identifying as an elf in his conversations with a Dalish Inquisitor? And what the absolute fuck happened to him wanting to bring back the magical marvels (that the ancient elves did in fact achieve) that were greater than anything we see in Thedas today? Here's what Epler has to say about elven magic, now:

I do agree that the elves have had their place in the sun at this point. [...] The thing about the Evanuris is that, ultimately, they were able to take a very specific type of magic and shape it into doing what they wanted. But even their understanding of magic was only skin deep [...] Even the magic that Tevinter wields, the magic of the Southern mages, is different from what the Evanuris used. The magic of the Evanuris is powerful but it's sterile, and it's constrained. So while the Evanuris have made magic work in a way that's more predictable and understandable, it's not the only kind of magic out there, and even then, I'd say they understood it at a very surface level. People were confidently describing how the natural world worked back in the 16th century. Very few of them were right.

First of all, Tevinter has been stated in previous games to have clumsily adapted ancient elven magic for their own, but they did adapt it. To the point where even Solas is surprised that Corypheus achieved effective immortality -- by binding himself to a dragon the same way the Evanuris did. So, cool, more contradicting the lore here. "They understood it at a very surface level" you mean when all of the magic of the Fade wasn't locked behind the Veil? You mean when magic flowed freely through the world? What do you mean, Surface Fucking Level? The entire point of the Dalish elf culture is what they lost; this wasn't the ancient elves thinking the sun revolved around the earth, the Veil was their fucking Library of Alexandria burning. Oh my god. I still cannot believe he said this.

And how have the elves had their day in the sun? I'm sorry, was Arlathan not given to... the Veil Jumpers? Instead of the Dalish? What happened to all the Dalish clans in the south, who had no infrastructure when the world was apparently blighted to hell? I guess they're just gone now! They've had their day! The story of the Dalish and the Evanuris is over (also confirmed in this AMA), and it apparently ends with the final snuff of the candle that is their culture. Congratulations, Chantry, you've won! Only took two genocides and a double blight, but we're done with the Dalish now! We get your mind-numbingly superficial factions instead!

What happened to Mythal, by the way? What happened to "She was betrayed as I was betrayed, as the world was betrayed! Mythal clawed and crawled her way through the ages to me, and I will see her avenged!" What happened to the reckoning that will shake the very heavens? John's answer to this:

People grow and change over time. Mythal's essence - and in particular, the fragment of her spirit that Morrigan carries, that she got from Flemeth - is not the same Mythal who he knew millennia ago. Centuries of living in this world and being around the kinds of people Flemeth found herself around - the Hero of Ferelden, Hawke, the Inquisitor - changed her views, and made her realize her own culpability in turning Solas into the kind of person he is now.

Oh, right, okay. So she was pissed for like a thousand years, got her big speech about the impending "reckoning" out 10 years ago, and then she just chilled out because the last 3 heroes were neat people. What a fucking joke. And yes, here is the confirmation that the Evanuris story is over --

The story of the Evanuris is done - the gods are dead (or imprisoned) and Thedas is in a state of flux and uncertainty. I imagine that whatever happens next is going to be a surprise to everyone, including the people of Thedas."

So I guess Mythal's reckoning is never coming. One of the most fascinating characters in the series, shrouded in mystery for those first 3 games, PROMISING US a blaze of glory, only to fizzle out in this one. Again, and I can't emphasize this enough, for Epler's clean fucking slate. And we've not just tied up her story, but also the Veil and the Blight:

When Solas bound himself (or, depending on your ending, was forcibly bound) to the Veil, it severed the connection that the Blight had to the waking world. The reality is that the Veil has been leaking ever since the Magisters first entered the Black City, and the dreams of the Titans gave it its terrible and awesome power. Now that the Veil is fully repaired, the Blight lacks that motive force, and being so close to the epicenter of that change has stripped the Blight in Minrathous of its vitality. It's calcified now - dead - and Bellara/Neve no longer suffer its effects. If they'd been anywhere else, further from that epicenter, it would've likely been different and they still would be looking for a cure.

So the Veil is permanently fixed now because our half-dead Dread Wolf bound himself to it (a decision I still don't understand) and that somehow fixed every single hole ever poked in it. Fully repaired. No more holes, no more "Veil is thin here" because tons of people died in the same spot, nope, we're washing our hands and leaving it (and the spirits) behind us because we've wrapped up both the series-long Veil storyline and the blight storyline in a big red bow.

And Epler tells us Solas not only bound himself to the Veil but fixed it entirely in one fell swoop, no ritual required, just a little slice to the hand. Again, all in the name of a clean slate, so any future installments or media centered around Thedas can turn away from this story.

Then there's this. What we can expect from future installments, I freaking guess. The aforementioned roleplay getting taken out back and shot:

Q: "What lead you to the decision to step away from active conversations with the companions as in previous Bioware games, where you can initiate them at any moment and ask exhaustive questions?"

John: "For us, because of tech limitations, it became a choice between exhaustive investigate conversations, or letting the companions move more freely around the Lighthouse. With the kind of experience we were going for, one where seeing the team grow around you is paramount, we felt that seeing them interact in common spaces (and in each other's rooms) made more sense."

Literally confirmed that they chose companions moving freely about the cabin over ... interacting with them outside the handful of cutscenes we got. Who in their right mind would think this was a good call in a Dragon Age game? A series that quite literally prides itself on complex character interactions and storytelling? So they could... sit in different places? Are you kidding me?

They don't see an issue with the game's reception. They don't have any interest in addressing or responding to criticism. They're either happy with their choices or EA's got a gun pointed at their heads, I'm honestly not sure anymore. I used to believe the latter was true, but looking at both Epler's and Busche's responses today, I'm inclined to believe the former.

So I think that's it for the series. Not that I thought it was going to get another game after this, but on the absolute off chance it did, what would be the point? The best stories were ruined. Anything left they have to tell is going to read a lot like Veilguard -- superficial, morally absolute, flagrantly disrespectful to the lore, and delivered in a very poorly written package.

[serahadmoni]

A Case for Bodhi Durran

Criminally underused and oft-sidelined, Bodhi Durran deserves…more. More attention. More consideration. More love. While plenty of fanon exists surrounding his character - including presuppositions of what his life was like before the apostasy, what his dreams for the future were before the Rider’s Quadrant -  for this commentary I will try to focus primarily on the text and evidentiary proof of his virtues. So, let's talk about how Bodhi Durran...

Is Loyal

“When you have a hundred and seven scars on your back, then you get to make the fucking decisions, Ciaran,” Bodhi snarls

I feel like all the Marked Ones who populate Xaden's inner circle have loyalty written indelibly on their hearts - loyalty to not only Tyrrendor, but specifically to Xaden. They understand the sacrifice he made then and the sacrifices he continues to make for them. Even when being loyal to Xaden means hauling dead bodies out of his not-girlfriend’s room at two in the morning. Or making clandestine smuggling runs . Or continuing to manage the operation in Xaden’s absence when the Navarrian leadership has begun to catch wise. Or when you take pains to ensure he’s left to his grief on the anniversary of his father’s death. Even when they sometimes butt heads over specifics, Bodhi ultimately defers to Xaden, because he…

Is Dutiful

[Xaden] dips his chin toward our wing, and two riders—Garrick and Bodhi—break formation, then climb the steps to stand behind Xaden, their hands at their sides.  “As it was a matter of life and death, I personally executed six of the would-be murderers, as witnessed by Flame Section Leader Garrick Tavis and Tail Section Executive Officer Bodhi Durran.

Again, all the Marked Ones display this quality in spades. Even if they don’t always agree with the methods Xaden uses, they will forever carry out their duty, his orders. Liam represents the ultimate expression of this quality, but the way Bodhi protects Violet in Xaden’s absence, even going so far as to risk his own reputation and command by constantly moving flight maneuvers to protect her is an undeniable expression of his sense of duty.

“You saved every single one of us here, cousin,” Bodhi says. “And we’re thankful. Now, I’d like to do what we’ve trained for, and if it means I don’t go home, then I guess my soul will be commended to Malek. I wouldn’t mind seeing my mother anyway.”

This speaks for itself. Both in the language of duty and loyalty, which only serves to accentuate the fact Bodhi…

Is Supportive

“You’re our best fighter,” a second-year near Xaden counters with a quick grin.

Though he and Garrick (and Violet) share in this responsibility to some extent, I still think in a lot of ways Bodhi is Xaden’s ultimate hype man. Mostly because he understands Xaden so deeply and as such is well aware how much Xaden needs it sometimes. He’s present for Xaden in difficulty. Willing to advocate for him, stand up for him even against the other Marked Ones as he does after Resson.

Bodhi grins, flashing a smile that looks exactly like my aunt’s used to. “Good to see you up and about, Sorrengail.” Then he smacks me on the shoulder as he walks off, looking back over his shoulder. “I’ll fetch the backup plan. Good luck.”

But it’s not just Xaden he supports…

When the Assembly wants nothing more than to toss Violet in a cell, he lends his voice to the arguments for her loyalty, her integrity: 

She fought at our side at Resson.” Bodhi tenses as his voice rises as well.

AND

In another, quieter moment, which speaks not only to his naturally supportive nature but also how well he can read others needs: 

“It’s a lost magic,” Bodhi says softly, appearing at my side. He rubs his thumb over his newly mended, scarless palm. “Maybe there’s a reason this stone never worked. It might be broken.”

He can tell how thoroughly the failed attempt at raising the wards shatters Violet’s self-confidence and even though he doesn’t know her as well as Xaden, he understands she needs reassurance, offering it freely. He also supports Violet in her burnout and when she’s crazed after hearing Xaden was injured. 

Bodhi Durran is a man who desperately wants everyone to be okay. Actively. Daily. Trying to not only keep everyone alive, but sane and grounded, because Bodhi…

Is Brilliant

The distraction Bodhi engineered in the flight field bought us time to meet without teachers noticing, but not much, especially considering that Devera, Kaori, Carr, and Emetterio are among those on campus still.

Personally, I would love to know what he threw together with zero notice that managed to keep the instructors busy long enough for Dain to call the quadrant to formation and Xaden (coughVioletcough) to issue his invitation. My guess, there were explosives of some sort involved.

Also, when they are climbing the Cliffs of Dralor with the fliers and the wyvern attack, he puts together what it means that the wyvern felt the pulse of the Aretian hatching grounds being reactivated before pretty much anyone else. He understands the wyvern will have relayed to their masters that the fliers and Aretian riders joined forces and the implications of such a report.

“I… uh… think we’re going to have to make some modifications on that harness,” Bodhi remarks as Andarna struggles to maintain her balance. “That’s going to take a few hours.”

Without drifting into the land of fanon, it’s hard to elaborate on this point except to highlight that Bodhi has the skills and know-how to modify an elaborately designed one-of-a-kind dragon harness. Were I to drift into fanon, I would shout from the rooftops that he’s the engineer of the group - the one that made sure Violet’s daggers would work for her, who consulted with Xaden on the prototype and modifications to Violet’s saddle, who also helped design and proof Andarna’s harness. Where Xaden may be the ideas-man in these areas, Bodhi executes. He’s the one who fixes their pocket watches when they won’t keep time or helps troubleshoot why the damn trigger on that crossbow sticks when any of the Marked Ones can’t figure it out for themselves. Ultimately, Bodhi wants to help in a tangible way because he...

Is Protective

In this, I feel it’s best to just let Bodhi speak for himself. 

When Varrish confronts Violet on the flight field before her first trip to Samara.

“You may leave, Cadet Durran,” Varrish says.  Bodhi moves closer to my side, and the male lieutenant takes a step closer as well, the mage lights catching the signet patch—fire wielding—on his uniform. “As Cadet Sorrengail’s section leader, I am the next in her chain of command. And as Article Four, Section Two of the Codex states, her discipline falls to her chain of command before being brought to cadre. I would be negligent in my duty were I to leave her in potential possession of… whatever it is you’re looking for.”

When Varrish pushes Violet to near burnout.

Bodhi’s warm brown face appears in front of mine. “Fuck.” He tugs the edges of the blanket closed around me. “This is because of Andarna?”  “Yes.”  Bodhi’s eyes widen. … “I’ll handle it,” Bodhi promises, capturing my gaze. “This won’t happen to you again.”

When Dain Aetos calls Violet to the mat because he’s pissed off that she won’t talk to him.

“You shouldn’t do this!” Bodhi shouts as he runs at us, skidding to a stop next to me. Imogen isn’t far behind. Ah, she’d run to find the closest person to Xaden possible. Makes sense. “She’s in a fucking sling, Aetos.”  “Last time I checked, you’re a section leader.” Dain narrows his eyes on Bodhi. “And your cousin isn’t her wingleader anymore. I am.”  The muscles in Bodhi’s neck bulge. “Xaden’s going to fucking kill him,” he whispers.

There are plenty of other instances where he protects others. Notably, when he steps in front of Carr to counter his signet as they are leaving Basgiath. And I’m certain there are hundreds of instances we don’t see since we are in Violet’s POV through the series. None of which detracts from the fact that Bodhi…

Is Principled

At the beginning of Fourth Wing, upon returning from a standard weapons run, he pushes Xaden and Garrick both, insisting: 

“There has to be something more we can do,” Bodhi argues, looking to Xaden, his voice low…

And then again at the end of the book, when the cadets are faced with a decision to fight alongside the fliers to save the Pormoish civilians or flee for Eltuval, he’s the first to insist they help. Even coming into conflict with Xaden’s more measured approach to the impossible dilemma Col. Aetos has enforced upon them. 

“How many people live in Resson?” Bodhi asks.  “More than three hundred,” Imogen answers as another boom cracks through the valley. “That’s the post they do the yearly trades at.”  “Then let’s get down there.” Bodhi turns and Xaden steps back, blocking his path with an outstretched hand. “You’re kidding me, right?”  “We have no idea what we’re walking into.” Xaden’s tone reminds me of that first day after Parapet. He’s in full command mode.  “So we should just stand here while civilians die?” Bodhi questions, and I tense. We all do, watching Xaden. 

As much as I love Xaden, and I do. I believe equipping the drifts with weapons is a means to an end for him. They are the thin, brown and feathered line between the venin and Tyrrendor. He wants to continue helping them, but I don’t believe - other than from an abstract “we don’t condemn innocents to death” perspective - he’s overly concerned with the preservation of individual Poromish lives. Bodhi, for better or worse, appears to be invested in the preservation of life in general. A grounded, guiding principle that thankfully he values because Bodhi…

Is Powerful

He sighs. “Yeah. Second time someone tried to jump me in the bathing chamber this week.”  My eyes widen as my heart hammers in my chest. “Are you okay?”  He has the gall to grin. “I completely eviscerated some asshole out of Second Wing while naked and only got a bruise. I’m fine.” 

I mean, besides the litany of weapons certification patches Violet observes early in Fourth Wing, Bodhi is just as skilled in unarmed hand-to-hand. While he’s never described as “on-par” with Xaden (since Xaden spars with Garrick almost exclusively unless he’s trying to make a point), Bodhi clearly knows how to handle himself. In the buff. With no weapons. And accruing no serious injuries. 

Which doesn’t even touch his signet…

“What have you done?” Carr shouts, running for us, his wispy hair flying in all directions as he lifts his hands. “You’ll end us all, over who? People you’ve never met? I won’t allow it!”  “Bodhi!” Xaden orders as Carr reaches Third Wing. Fire erupts from Carr’s hands, streaming toward the dais, and my stomach drops. Time seems to slow as Bodhi steps forward and twists his hand like he’s turning a dial. The fire dies, extinguishing like it was never there and leaving Carr staring at his hands.  “You taught us well, Professor,” Bodhi says, holding his hand in place. “Maybe a little too well.”  Damn.  “He can counter signets,” Xaden tells me.  Well, that’s fucking terrifying.

And though people have questioned Brennan's assessment: 

“By our best calculations,” Brennan says, rubbing his hands together to keep warm, “the six most powerful riders currently in Aretia are Xaden, Felix, Suri, Bodhi, Violet, and me.”

When you consider the potential of his signet…

Yes, he extinguishes Carr’s flames without blinking. But he can also smother Xaden’s shadows. Dispel Violet’s lightning. Destroy Mira’s wards. Keep Brennan from mending. He could have calmed Lilith’s storms. And while it seems like largely a defensive signet, there are offensive elements to it as well. Such as - and I’m not saying this would happen - he could remain completely invisible to Melgren, even without the benefit of three other Marked Ones. If such a thing were in the cards, he would be able to easily assassinate Melgren, undetected. 

And that’s if we don’t consider what, if any, mind signets he can counter. Can he reverse Imogen’s memory wipe? Or merely prevent her from performing one? Can he fool a truthsayer by offering them nothing to read? Based on the text, it appears Xaden is unable to read his intentions. Which would imply he’s impervious to not only inntinsics, but memory readers and erasers, truthsayers, etc. 

Considering we don’t know precisely how his signet works, it’s difficult to say for certain where the boundaries lie. Is it only as Xaden says, “He can counter signets?” Or is he interrupting the channel between dragon and rider entirely?  Which would have far more wide-reaching implications since he could theoretically also break the channel between gryphons and their fliers as well as venin and the earth.

Just like we really don’t have all the information about Violet’s “pure power” signet, we don’t have nearly enough hard information about Bodhi’s to say for certain where the potential expression of it may end.

Despite his physical and magical prowess, though, Bodhi…

Is Pragmatic

“I liked it better when we just delivered the weapons,” Bodhi mutters.

As principled, honorable, loyal, and dutiful as he is…same. He wants to help, but it’s hard. And dangerous. And running weapons is easier. I don’t blame him at all. 

His pragmatism is reflected in the text a hundred different ways, but it’s also simply stated by both him and Violet. 

“And I thought you were the most reasonable of the group.” I sigh. “Look, if I can help, then maybe we can prevent what I’m assuming are… supply runs.” Talking in code is ridiculous, but anyone could be listening. “Give me a job.”  “Oh, I am the most reasonable in the group.” He flashes a grin, leaning back on his heels. “I also don’t have a death wish. Survive second year and strengthen your shields, Sorrengail. That’s your job.” 

He is a man who gets things done. Which is not to say he’s not in touch with his emotions. But he understands the balance between necessity and diplomacy. Not that he’s a staid, stoic mission only guy either, because Bodhi…

Is Quick-Witted

“Hey, I hate to interrupt what’s obviously a moment,” Bodhi whispers loudly from my left. “But that was the last bell, so that’s our cue to get this nightmare started.”

AND

Bodhi wrinkles his nose.  “What?”  “You smell like dragon ass.”  “Fuck off.” I chance a whiff and can’t argue.  “I’m using your room.”  “I would consider it a personal favor.” I extend my middle finger and head toward his room.

Much as I appreciate and adore Bodhi’s quick wit, I could also write volumes about how his dry, sarcastic sense of humor operates as a defense mechanism. A lens through which he can deal with the intensity of his circumstances and the impact of these weighty decisions they are all making.

Like Xaden himself says, Bodhi always lightens the mood. To help himself deal? Yes. But (like Ridoc) also because he can tell everyone desperately needs it, a virtue that serves him well because he…

Is A Leader

”Shouldn’t you all be in Battle Brief?” Bodhi asks, his voice booming as he comes up behind us. One look sends the other squads scurrying for the door. 

Though a lot of space on the page has been given to Xaden, Rhiannon, and Violet’s obvious leadership qualities, Bodhi sprang from the same genetic line as Xaden. While the expression of the Riorson magnetism may be tempered by his natural demeanor, he possesses the same it-factor as Fen. Were I to lay bets, I expect his mother was similarly charismatic and it was expressed in her much the way it is in Bodhi.

“…Flame Section has the unique honor of being completely intact.” Brennan looks down at Bodhi. “Durran, you brought every single cadet. I guess that would make you the Iron Section.”

He inspired such loyalty from his section, they all defected. For so many reasons, including those already expressed above, I believe Bodhi to be a servant leader. Servant leadership rests on three pillars:  compassion, character, and competence. All of which Bodhi has in spades. He would not run a section the way Garrick did. Or the way Xaden ran his wing. Not that there was anything wrong with either of those philosophies necessarily. But he would pull with his squads, encourage them, equip them, support them, and push them gently to be their best. He would need to make certain they’re ready to face what he did in Resson, but he would do it with a deft, deliberate, more delicate hand than I think Xaden is willing or able to extend, because Bodhi Durran…

Is A Caretaker

So much of what has already been outlined above also represents an expression of this quality. From him helping Garrick protect Xaden’s solitude on the anniversary of Fen’s death. To him stepping between Aaric and Xaden when they start throwing barbs about Alic (which is also pragmatism, because hey, there’s a job to do). To him waiting with Xaden in the hall while Violet cleans up after Resson. He takes care of people both physically: 

“Whoa!” Bodhi throws up one hand, the other clutching his rucksack. “I don’t want you to freeze to death on the flight there.” He yanks his flight jacket out of his pack and hands it to me.

Bodhi helps Aaric out of his [disguise], careful with his blistered hands.  … “That’s a rebound burn,” Bodhi says. “It will clear up overnight if treated.”

”And tell Bodhi to track down whatever antidote she and the rest of her squad need.”

And emotionally, which leads me to the fact Bodhi…

Is Emotionally Attuned

An hour later, I’m bathed and impatient as I wait outside my room in a fresh set of leathers with Bodhi, who’s doing his best to lighten my mood just like he always does.

Bodhi reads people. Easily. He understands what Xaden’s saying without it being said . After Resson, he knows what Xaden needs from them - not questions, not reason, just action. He knows that Violet and Imogen need to run. And even when he can’t contradict Xaden’s orders, I believe he sympathizes with Violet’s driving need to do something to help, because it’s a drive he shares. Later, he knows not to carry Violet back to the quadrant after her burnout. And he’s the one that follows her into the courtyard to offer his jacket because he can see the panic plain as day. Just as he can see her disappointment when the wards fail. He can feel Xaden’s rage and terror as Violet lays comatose and poisoned (not that Xaden is overly subtle about it). 

On top of all of that, Bodhi…

Is Beautiful

He’s handsome, with tawny brown skin crowned by a cloud of black curls and a litany of patches on what I can see of his uniform under his cloak. His features are close enough to Xaden’s that they might be related. Cousins, maybe?

…Bodhi has the same bronzed skin and strong brow line, but his features aren’t as angular as Xaden’s, and his eyes are a lighter shade of brown. He looks like a softer, more approachable version of his older cousin...

Even Violet, who only has eyes for Xaden, recognizes how attractive he is. Yet, as fair and fine the wrapping, I would heartily declare his character fairer still.

While this is by no means an exhaustive list of his virtues - he's also humble, adaptable, a peacemaker, a good listener, infinitely capable, empathetic, and hyperaware of how he should conduct himself in a given situation - I think the case for Bodhi Durran has been made.

(originally compiled for the Onyx Storm countdown days at the RQ Discord)

[genderqueerdykes]

Thank you. Genuinely thank you so fucking much. I'm a trans guy who's been scared to talk about issues I deal with as a trans guy because it feels like any time I see a transmasc talking about anything someone or a lot of someones yell at them and harass them for hating trans women. I feel like it's only been getting worse and worse.

And yes, I fully understand that trans women have it really fucking bad, and are the main focus of a lot of IRL transphobia while trans men have moreso flown under the radar. But it seems like online, trans men have become the punching bag simply for being men. People call us evil for our gender.

It's just. Really nice to see someone standing up for us I guess.

I saw punkitt making a similar post and getting some horrific hatred, so I hope you're doing ok <3

hey, you're very welcome! thanks for taking the time to send this ask, i appreciate it

i'm honestly just so tired of watching people treat others like shit just because they've been mistreated. yes society treats trans women like shit. we know this, we're the ones experiencing it. we don't need to push that pain off on to someone else. instead of addressing our pain and tackling it head on, so many trans women and transfemmes are defaulting to attacking men and manhood to try to soothe that ache instead of just dealing with the actual goddamn fucking problem.

it's not okay that we've made trans men feel like they quite literally cannot even fucking talk. and it's not even JUST online where trans men and mascs are the punching bags, either, the fucked up truth about this is that it has bled into real world queer spaces. this is why we're seeing trans men and mascs getting kicked out of trans and queer spaces. this is why we're seeing people openly mock trans men and talk about misgendering trans men in person like as if that's somehow normal. this is happening in real life too it's not just online

i honestly don't give a shit if people wanna get mad at me over this and call me transmisogynistic or whatever. we have fostered an environment where we are telling trans women and transfemmes that it's literally okay to speak FOR and OVER other trans people, and that trans women and transfemmes are the only ones who "truly know" or whatever and it's actively damaging all of our communities. it's hurting people in real time. this isn't progressive, it's just hurting people.

it will never be progressive to assert that women and femmes are incapable of hurting others. even if that woman or femme has it very, very badly, they are still very much capable of hurting others. it doesn't matter how much someone suffers, they still have the capability of hurting others. stay safe out there, take it easy, and remember that you don't deserve to hate yourself for being a trans man. you're not hurting anyone by virtue of existing as a man

[mqnill]

I'm gonna rank all the enemies of Ultrakill cuz I'm bored.

Btw I am a noob and played only on harmless

Filth - 10/10

Nice goobers, basically walking french fries. I can never get mad at them, because how could I be mad at my best healers in this game? They are really cute and are pretty nice. I give them big hug after they take a bite of me! :3 (One punch them for fuel because damn that mouth might've as well ate me as a whole)

Stray -8/10

A bit annoying, considering they get to stand and shoot fireballs at me and move their asses from time to time. Luckily, they're too slow and suck at aiming unless I stand in one place. Great fuel and quite noticeable throughout the game (Until 7 layer, these babies are so similar looking to these fuck ass mannequins)

Schism - 6/10

Strays but upgrade I guess. Too much attitude backed up with unnecessary annyoing ability to live after charged blue shot. Hard to swallow pill. Although they have a noticeable for some reason butt. Idk why but okay?

Soldier - 5/10

That fucking bird that I hate. Would be a nice food, if it wouldn't kick me across the country. Ew.

Stalker - 7/10

Literally don't care about this.

Sisyphean Inssurectionist - 8/10

A tad bit irritating creature, always pushing me on the hot burning sand but it is fun to jump around. Reminded me of an old game on my playground where you stand on edges of sandbox and in the middle of it there is a "Shark" (kid that lost in rock, paper, scissors). This creature is a shark and well, no wonder it lost. I would too if I would only pick rock! Lol loser

Ferryman - 7/10

He was lightning, before the thunder. Confusing bone martial art master that goes up on some building, trying to strike me down with lightning. The dissaperance trick was fun, until I jumped out in the water, thinking he was hiding from me there. I died. Not cool killing me like that, dude. Be fair. Play nice.

Malicious Face - 8/10

Again, this flying fuck pisses me off, but it's a great healing thingy that needs only 100 nails (usually) to fall dead. Although, it is a shame it has to spit in me with fire. Nasty. I'm not into that kind of thing.

Cerberus - 5/10

I'm pretty sure Cerberus is a dog with three heads from Greek myhtology, so no idea why this overgrown football player has that name. This NFL fanatic throws his stupid ball at me and takis his big boy steps to get me, but I'm faster, this is when he stomps angrily instead of communicating his issues with me. Smartest man-looking creature that enjoys any games with ball. Fun to disrespect, not fun when he throws me away like he'd throw a deodorant if someone would offer him that.

Hideous Mass - 8/10

Perhaps hideous, but gives great piggy rides. Nice lobster, but I don't like seafood. Nothing more.

Idol - 5/10

Doesn't even hurt me, but god did you really have to put my food in zipper plastic bags so I couldn't eat them? (Puts some protection spell on other enemies, most often Virtue) Low blow.

Mannequin - 0/10

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU!!!! FUCK AHHGHGHHGHGGH I HOPE YOU AND ALL YOUR SPECIES DIE OUT LIKE A PATHETIC COCKROACH IMMITATORS YOU ARE!!!!! Scary, creepy, hard, fast? That is supposed to me. I am the war machine that sends horror in souls and their non-existent hearts. You fucking fucks, stayed out till 7th layer to make my life difficult. I better not see your asses anymore!!!! You all will be executed on the spot. I hope you know that you are an unwanted creatures, a poor imitation of anything and you deserve nothing but to rot behind closed doors, posed in worst yoga posses you can imagine. DIE!!!!

Swordsmachine - 10/10

It may be hard to beat, but idc. I love it. So pretty, so beautiful, so fashionate. Oh wow. I missedyou, sweetheart, missed this robot from the 1st layer, been thinking about their glorious attacks and cute rushing to hit me with their arm. Had to pause a game because they were just so... so... mwah.

Drone - 7/10

One eyed poor Shockwave parody. Go boom and kill all your brothers around you, loser. Doesn't even heal and explodes.

Streetcleaner - 9/10

Just one point away because they set me on fire and that's not really nice. But overall great bots, really sweet and they sound soooo cuteee. WAHHHHHH I WANNA KISS AND HUG THEM SO BAD!!! They deserve a big hug you people!!! (Swordsmachine got some competition)

Mindflayer - 7,5/10

Pesky cyan plastic-metal woman. Okay, you teleport, okay, you shoot blue faces that haunt me until they hit the wall (why would you inspirate mannequins like that), we got it. But dying with exploding yourself after I hit you twice with taser? A bit dramatic. Somehow slay, and somehow go fuck yourself, no need to be such a hard target, just stay still, will you?

Sentry - 5/10

I don't like them, but I don't hate them.

Gutterman - 2/10

Fat ass metal discord mod harassing my innocent poor soul. Kicks me across the galaxy, doesn't heal, have a stupid shield (okay cap america enjoyer) but it won't protect you from me. I will still fry these assholes with my taser. Womp womp, die faster.

Guttertank 0/10

Annoying stupid fucking huge discord mod's brother that got mad. CRY ME A RIVER (full of blood so I could use it as a fuel) AND DIE!!!

Virtue - 9/10

Nice healing thingy that explodes, thanks man, but stop trying to destroy me with holy light. It's not difficult to dodge, I'm just lazy and would prefer if I didn't have to do much with beating common enemies.

V2 - 10/10

I love this guy. So silly. So goofy. Hard to fight because that's a literal copycat of me, but hey!!! They're fun and that is all that matters (get coin in the face goofball). Got me a good arm to deal with Discord mods and another good arm to swing around like Spiderman.. But I miss the guy, they died because of me and it's so sad that I won't see them again 💔

The Corpse of King Minos - 10/10

Dapped up this guy so hard he died and healed my scoliosis. Hope he heals his brainworms wizards with fireballs that popped out of his eyes. I don't want that much eye contact buddy.

Gabriel - 10/10

Aside of his obvious attractiveness, a really fun guy!! I beat his ass, he got fired by upper angels and was supposed to die in 24hr unless he kills me (deadline is for real DEADline here), we fight again, I win, he has a moment of realisation, goes and kills his epmloyers, all upper angels, that stupid Council and then shows the beheaded to the public. Awesome. THE GOAT (greatest of them all) fr fr. We love you Gabriel

Leviathan - 5/10

I don't like sea food, I don't like baby faces. But fight wasn't that hard.

Minotaur - 3/10

Why the hell is he chasing me on my train?! Go touch some grass or smth idk

1000-THR Defense System - 7/10

Fun, easy, but confusing. Yet not exciting.

1000-THR Earthmover - 1/10

It was sickening and depressing to fight this Evangelion boss. So many parkour, stupid pests, scary heights I had to go through, no, jump through. But the last cry of this metal creature? Healed me better than anything.

Flesh Prison ?-10

has goofy ahh loking mouth (im not feeding you) no pic doesnt deserve it

Minos Prime - 3/10

Not gonna fight this guy cuz I no no wanna. Besides, this isn't transformers, you are not a prime, you look like a long lost father of The Spot from spiderverse, unserious and unneeded use of "thy" (ok medieval grandpa), bet you are no fun.

Flesh Panopticon - 0/10

what are you. why are you.

SIsyphus Prime - 4/10

Agai, this is not transphormers, but he has a fun voiceline so I'll allow his existence I guess

[thegodcomplcx]

Please tell me why you dislike Rory so much. I am so tired of how much the fandom talks about how amazing he is and I find it incredibly refreshing to see someone else who doesn't like him.

i have major problems with the way the show frames his character. you could change nothing about his personality and everything about his backstory and i would like him a lot more.

lets start with the way he's introduced. in the eleventh hour he is shown as a kinda dorky dude who is in love with amy, although he clearly places more value on their relationship than she does. (she refuses to admit that he's her boyfriend). after the two year time skip of that episode we see their relationship move from "guy that amy is unsure about dating" to "guy that amy is actively running away from marrying" okay. so clearly his only purpose is to be Something That Amy is Running From. i don't give a fuck about him personally.

and even after we properly meet him, he's still positioned as the thing between amy and what she wants. rory is the manifestation of the "domestic life" that amy has never wanted and has always felt pressured to want. (in the same vein, the doctor is just a representation of freedom, but he has depth outside of that and rory doesn't). so what exactly am i supposed to like about this guy? the fact that he loves amy isn't a virtue, it's the whole point of his character and i'm not giving him points for existing.

and if that isn't annoying enough, the writers reward him for this. we're clearly meant to sympathize with nice guy rory who deserves amy's love because he's...there i guess. and it gets fucking insufferable when he starts coming into himself and then it's all rory making choices for amy because he thinks he knows better than her and "my wife" and pissing contests with the doctor. and he just seems like a guy who is deeply insecure about his place in amys life and in her heart (which. for good reason. lmao) and he has to compensate by stifling her into a version of herself that settles for him.

[daviddoesdiscipline]

So You Want To Be A Servant

There are a few things anyone interested in becoming a servant should be aware of before signing up with a master.

1. The moment you surrender to your master, your life is over. You will simply exist. The only thing you will be allowed to do without permission is breathe.

2. You have to have a high pain tolerance. Prepare to be punished practically daily, often for no reason. Lube, if used at all, is for master’s comfort, not yours.

3. Be prepared to function at the highest level with little sleep. If master is frustrated because he can’t sleep and needs to take out his aggression, you better believe he will take it out on you. If master is horny at 3 am, guess who will be forced to pleasure him? Neither is an excuse for poor performance the next day.

4. Your only response to a command is either yes sir or yes master. It doesn’t matter if your task is humiliating. If I decide to walk you on a leash wearing nothing but a diaper, then that’s what will happen to you. I don’t care if you’re humiliated. You deserve it by virtue of being a servant, and therefore lesser than me.

5. You will be provided the basic life sustaining needs such as food, water, and shelter. Everything else is earned. Any tiny bit of comfort, including a blanket and clothes, is earned and will be taken from you for even the slightest misbehavior.

[holywaterinmybong]

Modern Manifesto

—

Take a gamble

If that’s all that you do

Take a gamble that life exists

Throw a coin

It might change your worldview

Put your anger to truth not your wrists

Shuffle decks

Cause it might give you time

To awaken, and to realize

Make a bet

It’s no longer a crime

When you talk, can you look in my eyes

Because I long for something that feels much too human

Find yourself something with meaning

With purpose

Cause you can’t fill the void with the things that are proven

Only acts of unbiased and all loving service

Take a gamble that love exists

And do a loving act

Dont waste time chasing cash

Don’t waste time with eyes blacked

Take a gamble that love exists

And you shall find purpose

Nihilists just won’t get it

Non believers deserve this

Let yourself feel the pain

Feel the cold of the rain

For fucks sake!

Just start acting alive

Smoke while living

Don’t smoke away life

Feel the wind and the sun

And don’t stop till they’re gone

Till you’re done with your time

Do both virtues and crimes

Make the most of your life

Or die trying

And God knows when you try

So stop lying

I’ve been trying my hardest

To live, if I’m honest

It’s harder than dying

Guess I gave it less shots

But I love everything

To the point that it burns

It feels better than graying

All alone with my words

I wanna love to the point

Where I love that love hurts

[some-triangles]

It's Portland's annual new year blizzard/ice storm, which we are unprepared for every year, because this never used to happen. It barely snowed here when I was a kid! I was a kid 30 years ago, mind you, and this has been happening pretty consistently for the last 20, but institutions are slow to change. We have been spending our money on other things.

So here I am, sitting in my own living room (my own in the sense that I rent it), in my long johns and thermals and two pairs of socks, heat on, still gradually losing feeling in my toes. This seems like a good day to write the politics post.

I belong to the category of person who expresses political and moral beliefs mostly through jokes, and only then when my personal frustration has reached a point where I can no longer make myself be quiet. The jokes are there to make the pain less raw, but lately the jokes themselves are getting dark enough that it's upsetting people. So let's proceed without the jokes.

Where to begin? In the 90s, I guess. I was brought up liberal but cynical, which is already kind of a tense balance, and I was by inclination a person who wanted things to make sense and follow understandable rules. (The answer is as always neurodivergence.) I figured out that religion wasn't real by looking at a map and realizing that the world was too big for any one group of people to be right about things. Despite this, I still thought American democracy was the correct answer, the least bad option, and that the world as a whole was heading towards where I was, a kind of tolerant, reasonable middle class existence.

In my defense, this was a belief broadly shared by my parents' generation, and I hadn't been taught a lot of the stuff that argued against it. Francis Fukuyama got up in front of people and declared the world a solved problem and nobody important even laughed at him. I bought into this to the extent that I suffered from a kind of wistful sadness that all the important battles had already been fought. In short, I was a child, and not a particularly bright one, despite what people told me. I did, however, form a belief that stays with me to this day:

I AM NOT SPECIAL. I, personally, do not deserve any more or any less than any human being. And since I think I should be safe and well fed, every other human being should also be safe and well fed. The fact that I am better off than some others is an accident which should be rectified.

This came about because I was aware that a lot of the people in the world were poor and miserable and I wasn't, and I had to decide whether luck or virtue was responsible for my safety. I went with luck. I didn't realize it at the time, but this choice put me at odds with a lot of the logic underlying the society I live in - because if I'm not special, you better believe nobody else is either, and that means no elect, no chosen, none blessed by god, none elevated by blood. I was 10, I hadn't even had a chance to fuck up my life yet, and yet there were all these other 10-year-olds worse off than me. Did they deserve that? And what about those kids who had it better?

And so, decades later, we end up with the joke about how it's a good deal to trade your life away to take out a rich person. It's the same impulse, just with a lot of broken promises and bitterness stacked on top. I work full time at a job that's officially essential (no stoppage during the pandemic), strenuous, and physically dangerous - I get paid the 1993 equivalent of a little less than $30k a year - I will never be able to afford a home in the city I grew up in. This job has to be done. I am not special, I do not "deserve" a better job. I, as a working person, watch people who do jobs that do not need to be done or who don't work at all get paid more because they are members of an invisible elect. I conclude that they must believe they are worth more than me, that they are better than me, because how else could they justify their lives? And I think if I subscribed to that worldview, it would be a net win for me to blow both of us up. Thus, the joke.

I also watch the rest of the world. My belief in liberal democracy is a pretty aerated Jenga tower by this point. Learning about America's imperial history took out a bunch of pieces, but I could still believe all that was behind us. Then we went back to war, which I could initially write off as a traumatic reaction, but as years turned into decades it became obvious that peace had been the exception, and that even that peace hadn't been that peaceful, had it? At that point it was still possible to believe that at least all of our bombing and killing had been in the interest of some kind of moral good, if you really tried. I think Gaza killed the very last part of me that could believe that. There is no atrocity we will not enable to pursue our own ends. Does it matter that much what kind of system we use to choose our leaders if this is what our leaders do?

The last thing keeping my tower standing is the need to protect the outgroups I and my friends belong to, which doesn't really rise to the level of a moral imperative. It's a moment by moment strategic thing, where you support institutions if they protect you and oppose them if they attack you, like any interest group. Right now HR culture and capitalism are trending pro-trans, so we support Disney against Florida. We will do voter suppression if the alternative is Trump. It doesn't go well with rule number one up there, but neither does the fact that I care about my friends more than I care about people I don't know.

At the end of the day it's all a joke. Moral imperatives give way to political reality one hundred percent of the time. It doesn't matter what I call myself. I hate tech culture, so why not be a Luddite? I'll smash steam looms in my mind while continuing to pay for my groceries. Just let me have my jokes. Trashfuture did a great riff about Butlerian Jihad the other day where they imagined a butler named Ian Jihad. "I've oriented sir's slippers towards Mecca, sir." That's the kind of political commentary I want, and the kind I will refrain from posting here unless my toes are really, really cold.

[invisiblegarters]

Be My Favorite Ep 7

It's Frigay again! Sweet, sweet Frigay, favorite day of the week.

Who would have thought that this show would be one of the major reasons I look forward to this day? I certainly didn't. I know I say this often, but I can't help it. This was so not on my radar that the fact that I am loving it so much just continues to baffle me in the best way.

Let's see if the back half can keep up the momentum.

Kawi's dad stuff still gets me.

Lol Kawi had a whole face journey while he was contemplating talking about the kiss. And aw, Pisaeng. I totally get the need to say the thing before he does, though. And I do love that he just wants to be there for Kawi in whatever way he can. That's lovely and sweet. But man, part of me wonders if Pisaeng is eventually going to be pushing a Pear agenda that Kawi is no longer into. I would be into it.

Speaking of Pear...she's definitely feeling some kind of way right now. I think that Not's words are burrowing into her head. Is it weird that I'm kind of looking forward to seeing her be less than perfect? Please do not get me wrong I love Pear and I don't want her to turn into one of those old BL girls who seems to exist just to cause problems, but I also don't think that anyone can be sweet all the time, even if they are a genuinely lovely person.

Oh, yay dad! So happy that the surgery went well.

And can I just say it - I think that if this were another show, Pear and Kawi could be a good story about moving on from first love (for her). One Kawi got himself a bit more together.

Oooh so last ep Kawi tells Piseang about his magical time travel crystal, and now he has actually traveled to the future in front of him. AH, I hope we're not stuck in the future for long, because you know I want to know if that will be remembered when he gets back!

Idol!Kawi, heh. Why do I find it so funny?

Max looking amazing as always. I want that jacket. Is he Kawi's manager? I'm so glad he's still around in the future because he makes everything 10x better by virtue of existing.

Ooh does this Kawi have an alcohol problem? Sounds like it. And yeah, Kawi is too excited about where he is to really listen.

So dad still died. Yeah, I kinda thought that might be the case.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH NO. I knew they would do this and I hate it. NOT DOES NOT (heh) DESERVE GOOD THINGS. I don't even care if he is Mr. Perfect in this timeline (I bet he's not). I hate it Kawi let's return it okay?

Ouch. Imagine being such a bad guy that Not is preferable as a romantic partner.

I do wonder though if Max and Pisaeng still talk. I hope they do and Max is just not telling Kawi because he doesn't deserve/need to know.

I have to say that I wonder if we'll stay in the future for a bit longer this time - eventually it's gonna take longer for the crystal to work, if it works at all, right? The old man did say that it wouldn't work forever. Kawi better get his shit together before he gets stuck in a timeline that really blows.

Then again...well. Maybe that's part of the point, eh? Isn't that always the point of time travel narratives? That you can't change the past, but the future is still unknown so that is what you should focus on? I don't know if that's the case here - I haven't read the novel it's based on - but pretty much every time travel thing I've seen where someone keeps trying to fix a past mistake seems to go that way. Granted I know I haven't seen all of them. But I think that is why dad keeps dying. It happened, it's going to happen, dad's fate is sealed and done. The end. And no matter how hard Kawi tries, that won't change.

Or maybe I'm talking out of my ass and Kawi can fix it. 😂

Time will tell, but I have to say if he can't, I'd be okay with it even if it sucks.

Not quite the same reason Kwan. My guess is you love Not, which...girl, love yourself more. You can do better. You should date Pear instead. And Not was dating them both. Sigh. He's still the same old asshat. Joy. I almost wonder if Pear knew and married him anyway.

She did know. And is pregnant. Oh, Pear. Honey. I hate this timeline for you.

Max still delivering truths. Truly the best.

I bet Kawi blamed Piseang for the deterioration of his relationship with Pear. I just bet.

And ha, of course Max knows where he is. I knew it.

Aw, maybe Kawi should just let the man fish.

Whatever Kawi did and Piseang still can't let him be upset. Dude is too good for future!Kawi (he's too good for past!Kawi too, but at least past!Kawi is working towards improvement, not taking a wrecking ball to his own life like future seems to have done).

And then a frolic. I do love a good frolic.

Oh Piseang. Your continued crush is both adorable and a little pathetic. I say that with love, because you're still in my top three faves.

Okay look. I appreciate that Gawin can sing. I do. But I also don't need to hear it, especially not when I've already had to hear Krist this same ep. Singing in BL is never gonna be my favorite thing even if they have pipes (which frankly, many of them do not, I'm sorry but there it is).

Oop Kawi's gonna kiss him. He looked way too in love during that song not to. Do you even know what your face is doing, Kawi? Do you?

And there it is. In their matching shirts and everything. And it's another real kiss. What the fuck happened to Krist?

Hahaha oh my god PIsaeng you utter sap.

Looks like it's back to the past next week. Good, because Pear did not deserve that timeline at all.

[pupmkincake2000]

Another annoying thing I'm going to talk about.

I have noticed that very often when Connor has a brother in fics and this brother is 900/60 (whether it's human AU or not, doesn't matter), Hank is presented in his eyes as "fat, old, unattractive, ugly" etc. I understand that in this case they seem to be trying to show us that the brothers have different tastes, especially if 900 is with Gavin in such fics, but personally I find it so unfair and humiliating towards Hank. It doesn't seem like "look we're twins/brothers, but we have different tastes", but more like "oh, my brother is dating some nasty old man, but I have a young, handsome and hot lover. We are much better than them". It shouldn't be like this. There are many ways to show the difference in preferences, but for some reason people choose the worst one. Connor, of course, considers Hank handsome, but often it is presented as if Connor has strange tastes that do not fit into generally accepted standards, which is also terrible).

Hank is not fat (and I don't mean that being overweight or chubby is bad, but this moment is often described as if Hank's body is something ugly and unpleasant to look at), this can be clearly seen in the screenshots, he is not ugly, to me personally he seems to be the most beautiful man I've ever seen. He has a noble appearance, non-standard, yes, but noble. Grey hair? So what! His hair is like silver that seems to flow between Connor's fingers as he burrows them into his hair. Hank is strong, but at the same time sweet, loyal and noble. And it's canon. And if in human AUs I can get it (except not really), however, I still think people can choose less offensive ways to show the difference in tastes between the brothers. And in the canon universe it would not work like that at all.

Androids are not humans, therefore their preferences will be based on not appearance, but rather on personal qualities. And I'm guessing that since androids are all pretty much the same, standard good looks, they're more likely to be attracted to people (if we're talking about human/android pairs) that are different from them. And yes, I believe that Hank in this case will be for them the most beautiful and hottest representative of his kind.

I sometimes see how Gavin is called handsome/hot, although, as for me, his appearance is rather ordinary, it’s just that this character archetype is more familiar to the public. Add to this all headcanons. But in combination with his canon personality, his appearance seems rather repulsive to me personally.

I think that Hank is much more beautiful and does not deserve the words people use to describe him. And I also see no reason why 900 cannot perceive Hank the way he is perceived by Connor: as handsome, noble, loyal and sweet. Hank has many virtues, but for some reason they are forgotten, because people concentrate only on his appearance, although, sorry, he is beautiful!

Not just from Connor's perspective. He is canonically handsome man! Yes, people fanon he does not think of himself as an attractive man, because he is no longer young, he has depression and so on. But in the game tho? There is nothing like that! What makes people think he thinks he's ugly or not worthy?

And personally, I think that if 900 existed in the Detroit universe after the peaceful revolution, then he would look at Hank the same way Connor looks at Hank. I don't see any contradiction here.

[translesbianvampire]

gay bitch fangirls over always sunny

i've just realized that tumblr is the perfect place for a queer bitch to nerd out about her favorite show. i finished it a month ago and...oof, i love this thing. i find it weirdly beautiful in a way. i enjoy seeing the most dysfunctional people put to air's misadventures, and i am definitely one of the disturbed people this show comforts lmao.

despite functionally/nominally about being horrible people doing horrible things, the gang somehow never quite lose every scrap of humanity they have; i guess by virtue of being white trash instead of upper-class. there are times when the gang are appalled at the atrocities someone ELSE comments, and sometimes when even they feel maybe they're going too far. (they usually don't things like "no" stop em tho...)

i also love the way it weaponizes every facet of being a sitcom, and uses them to comment on what happens within the show: +you can just pop in at any time during the show's run and not be too lost, not extremely reliant on past events & arcs

-the gang experiencing extremely traumatic events is not an "arc" or something that is ever dealt with/brought up again, considering their ol' reliable is drinking it down & not talking about it

-as sitcoms go on, they typically become sadder, as it just gets depressing that this group of people literally has nothing else to do with their lives.

+depressing is the point.

-as sitcoms go on, characters typically undergo "flanderization", where previously minor aspects of their character become their entire personality within the show. typically is extremely annoying

+the gang functions as a vicious echo chamber that they are trapped within, as no one in the outside world can stand being with them. also, they are CHRONIC abusers of alcohol & a million other substances like glue. it makes sense that charlie only becomes more illiterate, considering his habits (which include eating cat food & huffing glue) never really change

-to keep sitcoms running, the characters remain perfectly static throughout, and it is only really the situations & people around them that change

+the core of what makes the characters who they are doesn't change much over 15 seasons, but they DO grow with the times; just very, VERY slowly. i think they've handled this adeptly; in season 10, they eased off dennis' creep-oness in the second episode by having him be on the RECEIVING end of his weird rating system, in one of the most hilarious & quotable moments of a show that is already hilarious & quotable throughout. I'M A FIVE STAR MAN!!!!

there's prolly even more i can't think of. but it is such BRUTAL satire of...basically anything i CAN think of. it's this satire that gives depth to, what on the surface, might appear as a banal show that only exists to be offensive. the writers actually do NOT write to offend anybody (except maybe rly stuffy stuck-up ppl lmao)! it started as basically just wanting to write a sitcom that's "real", about a group of friends that are NEVER there for each other (tho they ARE there for each other, sometimes!). and this ended up being the perfect vehicle to satirize a LOT of facets about american life.

i also LOVE the way sunny handles queerness! it is not something that inherently makes you a better NOR a worse person, but it's also smth that always deserves respect, no matter who the queer person is. this is where its sitcom format works beautifully yet again; after mac's genuinely moving coming out moment as the s13 finale, s14 starts off...the way any other season starts off, and i LOVE that.

(sidenote: i don't think mac's brief coming out then re-entering the closet in s11 is an issue! that's real life. a friend of mine realized she was prolly trans, then decided she wasn't, and recently re-realized that she is lol. THAT'S LIFE!!!! tho, it would've been an issue if mac NEVER came out i think, but they had him come out in s12, and come out beautifully to his dad in s13)

i think always sunny succeeds at having...let's say, "very morally complicated" characters, while not accidentally glorifying them as much as the sopranos or breaking bad (tho i still love those shows hehe), while still having them be human. i think it is a beautifully human show. the show does not lie in the SLIGHTEST about who these people are, yet i am still excited to see another season with this gang i somehow do still root for. it shows us EVERYTHING about who these people are with less shame than we think about ourselves. we share in their every high, every low [of which there are many], and everything in between. and that's what bein' human is all about.

[nicklloydnow]

“For good or ill, all things must end. And the peculiar modalities of this end, both for each of us as individuals and for the motley aggregate of our species, are quite literally incalculable. All the same, a few foreglimpses are not impossible to offer the curious. These are hypothetical imaginings for those who have been too lax or craven to conjure them on their own. By putting one's mind to the task, however, it seems that certain rules and conventions relating to the cataclysmic as a general proposition do reveal themselves without excessive strain or harm. Traditionally, some depictions of apocalypse are more predominant than others in histories, revelations, and intuited expectations of the end. For example, there is likely an element of the unheard-of in each one, a quality of the unearthly in phases ranging from the subtly dreadful to the outrageously sensationalistic. Yet, while bizarrerie may be amusing and a relief from boredom, when it comes to an ultimate termination the usual predilection is for a total blowup, an explosion or vaporization fully and forever. And, for the most part, apocalyptic promises tend to take this form. A good encyclopedia or a repository of relevant scriptures are helpful in this regard, providing illustrations of conclusive tempests of butchery and havoc leaving naught but vacant wastelands behind them.

But there are other renditions of apocalypse that are at odds with those delineated above. These involve scenarios wherein groups of stragglers hang about in a setting of inanity with a bit of décor, either survivors of or latecomers to oblivion. Consequently, the entire business is left unfinished, because some have been overlooked, actors who for a time play out a prelude to the Great Going. Since no wholesale apocalypse has ever been visited on this world, predictions that everything will be torn to pieces are but conjecture, however devoutly wished for. Thus, we must question whether any purported "end" is ever complete, except perhaps in whispered fables and fabrications swindling us with apocalypses by halves and quarters, even ones that involve a single ill-fortuned loner. Therefore, we may be disappointed by a given picture of apocalypse, pained that it leaves anything at all in its wake, so that each presents an all-consuming shockwave smashing the whole thing to bits that drift into the primal blackness a genuine finality. Then again, they are in no way restrained from going to the limit with something that by deftnition is fatality itself, producing a gruesome ta-da for those who like that sort of thing.

In the end, so to speak, it might be asked: Should we fabricate representations of apocalypse, as we have done so often over the centuries? This question is, of course, infinitely debatable. Perhaps more to the point: Should we wallow in such fantasies, as we unquestionably have done over the centuries? One reason we should—not the only one, but the only one pertaining to the pages that follow—is that all is not right with the world . . . and when all is not right in every detail imaginable, then some will find solace (bitter as it may be) in a lusty imagining of the end. They may not deserve this solace, as many would hoot, but opinions vary on who deserves what in any world conceivable. Why someone would believe that all is not right with the world is anyone's guess, or their self-arrogated judgment concerning what is right or not right with anything at all. Still, there are these pictures of apocalypse on offer, and even though these pictures are only inventions, we might argue that by virtue of their being invented, because a consciousness exists sufficiently educated in endings, which, it should be divulged, will involve anguish, all is not right. It is—to put it kindly—deficient, defective, blemished to its core. It is faulty to such a degree that it would be no more than just and honest to exclaim that nothing is right, properly speaking. Thus, what is the point in equivocating? The pictures are there, one apocalypse followed by another great or small, indefinite or definitive. They have already been inserted into existence, as built-in as breath and the end of breath.

Given the succession of horrors with which we have been intimate for so long, we may infer that no endpoint will be a beatific release from the pain we have always known. No apocalypse will be anything but awful. And nothing more need be said. It only remains to pass around the pictures.”

[pesterloglog]

Karkat Vantas, John Egbert

Act 4, page 1907

CG: OK IT'S A FEW MINUTES LATER.

CG: LOOK HOW SANE AND LINEAR WE ARE BEING.

EB: yeah!

CG: OK AWESOME, NOW FUCK YOU AND GOODBYE.

EB: wait!

CG: WHAT.

EB: i was just looking at all these rascals, and i was wondering...

EB: how they go back in time and become us and stuff.

EB: does it have something to do with the reckoning?

CG: HOW DO YOU KNOW ABOUT THAT.

EB: you told me.

EB: we had this great dare going.

EB: to see who could be the least helpful and informative.

EB: and you totally lost, dude!

EB: you were hella helpful.

CG: I WAS OBVIOUSLY JUST SPITING YOUR STUPID POINTLESS HUMAN DARE.

CG: WHAT IS A DARE ANYWAY, IT'S NOTHING.

CG: SOMEONE SAYS DO SOMETHING AND THEN, OH LAUGH LAUGH, YOU LOSE IF YOU DON'T DO IT.

CG: THAT ISN'T ANYTHING THAT DESERVES A WORD.

CG: WE DON'T EVEN HAVE A WORD FOR DARE IN OUR LANGUAGE.

CG: THE CLOSEST APPROXIMATION WOULD BE "WORTHLESS FUCKING BULLSHIT WASTE OF TIME FOR SILLY LITTLE CHILDREN"

EB: oh, wow.

EB: is that the title of a movie too?

CG: YES, IT'S THE TITLE OF EVERY DUMB MOVIE YOU EVER LIKED.

EB: ha ha, that isn't even true and doesn't make sense!

CG: ANYWAY, HOW COULD WE HAVE MADE A DARE IF I'M MOVING BACKWARDS ON YOUR TIMELINE.

CG: YOU WOULD DARE ME TO DO SOMETHING, THEN I WOULD DO IT NEXT TIME, BUT THEN YOU WOULDN'T EVEN REMEMBER THE DARE.

CG: BECAUSE WE DIDN'T MAKE IT YET.

CG: THAT'S WHAT ISN'T TRUE AND DOESN'T MAKE SENSE YOU DAMP BAG OF PUKE.

EB: well yeah, the dare never happened, i was joking around and made that up to give you hard time.

CG: YOU HAVE SOUNDING STUPID DOWN TO SUCH A SCIENCE.

CG: WHERE IS YOUR LAB COAT AND TEST TUBES DOCTOR BRAIN PROFESSOR?

EB: i am wearing a lab coat!

EB: sort of...

CG: YOU LOOK LIKE AN ELF.

EB: that's bullshit!

CG: YOU LOOK LIKE YOU SHOULD BE BLOWING INTO A FUNNY LITTLE SHELL, AND LIMBERING UP FOR A SILLY COOKIE DANCE.

EB: do you even have elves?

CG: YES, LET'S COMPARE WHICH FANTASY CREATURES THAT DON'T EXIST WE BOTH DO OR DON'T NOT HAVE.

CG: WHAT A GREAT FUCKING IDEA, JOHN!

EB: uh, what?

CG: YOU ASKED ABOUT THE RECKONING, SO WHY DON'T WE TALK ABOUT THAT INSTEAD OF ALL THESE PRETTY MUCH TERRIBLE THINGS.

EB: ok.

CG: YEAH, SO WHEN THE RECKONING STARTS HAPPENING, ALL THESE PARADOX CLONES GET SHIPPED OFF TO METEORS, FLUNG THROUGH SKAIAN DEFENSE PORTALS, AND SENT BACK TO EARTH.

CG: END OF STORY I GUESS.

CG: BYE.

EB: wait!!!

EB: so that means...

EB: we are all sort of like superman?

CG: UH YEAH, I GUESS.

EB: cool!

CG: YOU ALL TRACE THE MYTHOLOGICAL FOOTSTEPS OF YOUR BELOVED HUMAN SUPERMAN WHO'S REALLY JUST A MUSCULAR CAUCASIAN ALIEN.

CG: IT'S HILARIOUS HOW HUMANS WORSHIP HIM AS A PINNACLE OF HUMAN HEROISM AND VIRTUE BUT HE ISN'T EVEN HUMAN.

CG: ACTUALLY IT'S INCREDIBLY PATHETIC.

CG: BUT ALSO IN A WAY KIND OF ADMIRABLE.

CG: BECAUSE IT MEANS DEEP DOWN YOU ALL MUST REALIZE WHO YOUR DADDY IS.

CG: WE ARE, BITCHES.

EB: yeah, superman is pretty cool, i guess.

EB: did you know nicolas cage was almost going to play superman one time?

CG: OH MY THROBBING PHLEGM LOBE, WHO GIVES A BARFING FUCK ABOUT THAT.

CG: JOHN EGBERT, YOU HAVE ASSASSINATED MY PATIENCE.

CG: ADIOS LOSER.

EB: wait!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

EB: get back to me in a couple minutes, ok?

CG: SD;LKFJSD;LKFJSDLFKJ;

CG: FINE.

[beregosts]

neck kisses that turn into love bites.

she does see the irony in it, that the very heart whose existence she'd once doubted should now tempt her to sleep with its steady rhythm beneath her cheek. it isn't an option, however, regardless of how content she feels. sleep would require time they don't have, prove dangerous if it stretches too long or too comfortably. instead, arlis embraces the easy silence that has settled between and allows her fingers to trace over each rib and across the litany of scars dotting his torso. their placement is known to her now, as is most of their stories.

the chill in the room has her curl closer, grateful for the warmth his form exudes. (the would-be tyrant cannot be in too comfortable a space, after all. the dreadmaster should not rest well.) still, arlis thinks, better here than the house prior, that place that could not be called a home that finally revealed the fractures in him.

despite somber thoughts, sleep calls to her after a long day of composing herself of the city's expectations. that is what she is now, after all, more virtue than living thing, some vaulted name rather than beating heart and flowing blood. her eyelids grow heavier and she blinks forcefully enough to flinch in order to stave off the desire to close them.

"what is it?"

"i wish-," a sighs falls from her lips as her gaze moves to her dress, carefully laid out across the room. there is a routine that they both adhere to now. there must not be any wrinkles set within her clothes when she leaves. any messied braids will be carefully redone. there cannot be any trace of the way they have sat together as more than hero and villain, no hint of the nights where his mouth has mapped her scars and her fingers have clutched at the planes of muscle lining his back. no one can know, no one can even be allowed to guess, that his name is gilded with adoration when it is gasped from her lips rather than stained with loathing, "i wish we had more time. i wish i didn't have to scurry off into the night, that i could just... stay here, properly, until the morning."

enver's hand reaches for her own, his fingers coming to rest along her wrist. it does not go unnoticed by her that he is the one to initiate this contact. he huffs quietly. "are you implying you'll miss me after you leave?"

her initial instinct is a retort, to give something back with just enough bite to offer him the chance to spar, if he wishes. however, arlis sits with the question, realizes that there is something real to it. he has offered her the chance to brush this all aside, mock it even, but, despite his best efforts, that faint sheen of authenticity remains. she decides to respond with something real in turn.

"of course i will." she shifts so their eyes meet. his dark gaze catches the candlelight and she tucks a loose lock of ebony hair behind his ear. "i'm hardly going to advocate for your early release, but i'd much rather go to sleep and wake up beside you than wonder when next i'll see you and how long we'll have. i wish you were by my side, rather than locked away, though i know you deserve it. does that surprise you? i miss you when we're apart and i know exactly how many days it is you've left to serve."

a finger moves to trace over his jaw, trailing south to the scar etched into his neck. her next words are gentle but certain. "i want you in the daylight, enver, free and beneath the sun."

he looks at her and, for once, that clever tongue is stilled in silence. he finally briefly opens his mouth to speak, only for it to close half second later, and then he is kissing her fiercely, urgently. her fingers weave into his hair when his lips move to her neck, the stubble of his jaw scratching against tender skin. arlis sighs, tilting her head to allow him more space, and his name is crafted tenderly on the tip of her tongue.

it earns her a teasing bite just below her pulse and her eyes flutter shut, fingers tugging at his hair in response. another hint of a bite, like for like, and the quiet groan that rumbles in his chest all but leaves her dizzy. "enver-," a sharp inhale when his teeth scrape against her collarbone, "leave a mark."

he pauses and she feels his breath against her.

"something from you to take with me, after i leave," arlis murmurs unwaveringly, "something just for us." she cannot carry any favor of his, but this, she thinks, will suffice.

his lips chart their course to where her shoulder meets her neck, resting in that slender arch. "you'll need to find something with a higher collar, arlis."

she hums in amusement, nuzzling a kiss into his hair. "it'll be too dark for anyone to notice when i leave and, besides, i've quite the wardrobe now. i'll manage, but your consideration is both noted and appreciated."

she's certain she can feel his smile pressed into her skin.

[davekat-sucks]

A consecutive ask bc why not.

June deserved better. Many people came up with the trans headcanon because they viewed Johns struggle with masculinity as a mirror to their own experiences. Thats cool, i like shit like that, a valid cool reason to hc john as trans. Instead now its just used to virtue signal or call other people transphobic.

As to trans trolls, yeah it doesnt make sense they have to have compatible genitals so thats not on the table, only difference between male and female trolls is presence of non-mammillian breasts and increased aggression, which is questionable because there are different aggression levels in each gender. So gender for trolls is largely for show. Except its not as alternia is a matriarchy.

Well either way, trans trolls would be on the culling block anyway because of the eugenics Alternia practices.

I definitely would have preferred it better for June Egbert to just be a genderbend instead of trans. Because there are some people who identified as trans, do not want to change an already existing character. But I guess opinions like theirs don't count for the modern fandom. They are seen as traitors. You think people who headcanon or make fantrolls that are trans, would think of the implications that they have a chance to be killed by drones, plants, animals, or other trolls. If the trans trolls are lowblood, a highblood killing them is seen as the norm. Why would they want to put their projected self to even more and worse pain in a fictional setting compared to their own lives in the real world?