#but for now have it

[capn-twitchery]

OC smash or pass!!

Rules: pretty self explanatory. include physical descriptions or pics, and propaganda. the “other” label can be used for “sexuality misalignment” (ie: oc is femme and you’re gay, vice versa or you aren’t into smashing but a specific thing you wanna do with them like perhaps hug or study them under a microscope idc).

tagged by: @esteemed-excellency & @the-dye-stained-socialite

i'll do both my guys but twitch up first 🫡

name: captain twitchery lazaret (the captain is very important)

age: almost 40. somewhere around there

gender: no thank you but also yes all of them at once, at the same time

sexuality: yeah!

🏴‍☠️ pros:

great conversationalist! charming, kinda theatrical great sense of humour & mischief. fun at parties.

overconfident. zero shame. very flirtatious

down for anything, all the time. will try anything (or anyone) at least once. very adventurous (will take you zailing!). hedonist 100

wild. thrill seeker. you won't ever get bored

legs? very tall

very experienced, 95% dom. primarily power bottom but happy to switch good luck getting them to sub it IS a fight but it can be done. much easier if you're dating

❓❓vague mystery class zone

always on the go, does not stop. will talk forever. zero sense of personal space or etiquette

one of you is gonna have to have your eyes covered somehow & it will probably not be twitch. this is not up for debate (if it is debated they are leaving)

will tease you til you want to kill them. if they find a way to push your buttons they are slamming that thing

avoids emotions 100%, this is for funsies only. this is also not up for debate

🏴‍☠️ cons:

i'm gonna be real they are so fucking annoying sometimes

weird & intense. makes so much eye contact. feels like they're studying you

easily bored. they won't stay still for very long before they want to do something else

if you're hooking up there's an 85% chance they won't remember your name like a week after. is it the memory issues or did they just not bother to commit it to memory? yes

inconsiderate & kinda rude. not really in the bedroom but outside of it? yeah

adrenaline seeker (derogatory). enemy of the state (maybe that's a pro actually)

[willowcrowned]

if you're feeling powerless right now—and god knows I am—here's a reminder you can donate to the National Network of Abortion Funds, the Trans Law Center, Gaza Soup Kitchen, the Palestine Children's Relief Fund, and hundreds of other charities that will work to mitigate the damage that has been and will continue to be inflicted

life continues. we still have the capacity to do good, important work. that matters

[genderfluid-druid]

hurr hurr I'm a human body hurr hurr I'm gonna solve all my problems using mucus

[bookwyrminspiration]

god I would be UNSTOPPABLE if I was capable of consistently initiating tasks. just you wait. you'll be waiting a while but just you wait

[heph]

Yall ever think about how Ford had to relearn how to be a normal human being after 30 years of isolation

[girlstressed]

can’t stop smiling in inappropriate situations

[stemmmm]

bad youtube clickbait thumbnail that reads "I think I just had a therapy session with a DEMON???"

[tearosepedall]

EDIT : THIS IS A MEME DO NOT TAKE IT SERIOUSLY (and seriously just don’t be Rude????? Like wtf lol)

[theblob1958]

people are saying do it scared, but you also gotta do it alone. you'll miss out on so much you want to do if you wait til someone will do it with you. do it scared and do it alone.

[frenchublog]

kosovo miku

[butchfalin]

the funniest meltdown ive ever had was in college when i got so overstimulated that i could Not speak, including over text. one of my friends was trying to talk me through it but i was solely using emojis because they were easier than trying to come up with words so he started using primarily emojis as well just to make things feel balanced. this was not the Most effective strategy... until. he tried to ask me "you okay?" but the way he chose to do that was by sending "👉🏼👌🏼❓" and i was so shocked by suddenly being asked if i was dtf that i was like WHAT???? WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY TO ME?????????? and thus was verbal again

[lgbtlunaverse]

The world exists in such a baffling state of simultaneous sex-aversion and sex-hegemony. Every social platform on the internet is trying to banish sex workers to the shadow realm but I can't post a tweet without at least two bots replying P U S S Y I N B I O. People are self-censoring sex to seggs and $3× but every other ad you see is still filled with half-naked women. Rightwingers want queer people arrested for so much as existing in the same postal code as a child and are also drumming up a moral panic about how teenage boys aren't getting laid enough. I feel like I'm losing my mind.

[gallusrostromegalus]

I am watching a mouse make a series of what I can only describe as Fuck Around Choices, and the Find Out is VERY excited to continue this little experiment.

[gayvampyr]

asking people to be mindful of others when sharing a communal space (especially one you cannot just up and leave from) is not selfish or misanthropic. come on now

[sabertoothwalrus]

modern au laios