#but dudes got no game 😂
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xdeath-by-poisonx · 10 months ago
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.•°§°•.
Sir Pentious: "Attention, everybody! Ms. Cherri Bomb has finally confessed her feelings for me!"
Cherri: "Bitch, all I said was that you could sit next to me."
Sir Pentious: "Precisely!"
.•°§°•.
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blupengu · 6 months ago
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Y’all is Hollow Knight hard or do I just suck because oh my god??
#not gonna inflict my ramblings onto someone else’s post so just making a text post for myself#but oh my god#what the fuck?#maybe I’m not a hardcore metroidvania fan but I like them well enough#do I suck that badly at games now?? am I old to the point that my hands can’t do this shit????#did I just somehow fuck myself at some point???#because wow this feels kind of sadistic????#and not even in the fun kind of way?????#like I think I’d rather submit myself to fear and hunger again rather than continue where I am now in hk#idk maybe I’m missing something#but I just got wall jump and was so happy until I fell down to where you can challenge those mantis dudes#got myself out of there but then as I was exploring northwest I keep dying and reviving from the fucking bouncy balls over water#and the normal mantis mobs are also kicking my ass?#and dont even get me started on the weird tentacley nuclear bomb mushroom things those are just bullshit#AND THEN AS I WAS HAVING A GOOD TIME EXPLORING HEADING TOWARDS A SAVE BENCH I GET DROPPED INTO DEEPNEST??????#WHAT KIND OF JUMPSCARE BULLSHIT??????????#AND THE FUCKING COCKROACHES THAT NEVER SEEM TO STOP SPAWNING KILL ME#and then I see how fucking far back I’ve been dropped in the corner of fungal wastes#and I try jumping through the fucking bouncy balls again#and I die and lose my money#I can’t fucking do this shit anymore y’all holy fucking shit#the number of times I’ve died and restarted from that fucking fungal wastes bench I am so sick of it 💀#legit I think this is the first time I’ve rage quit a game#it’s been a while since a game’s actually made me this angry I want to fucking throw something 😂#the willpower and self control I needed to not chuck my pro controller across the room…#if I didn’t have neighbors and a unit below me I’d be throwing shit for sure though#but instead I must smack pillows against my mattress in a rage 😂#I think I hate the ‘go back to where you died to get back your money’ punishment system… like legit I actually really really hate it.#I do think the game is fun and I know I’ll probably quickly gain the money… but it feels like the game’s telling me I fucking suck lmao#suffice to say I will not be playing any more hollow knight for the foreseeable future 💀
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ashtxrie · 5 months ago
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due 11:59 pm
— alternatively, enhypen hyungs as your typical high school crush!
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PAIR. high school! enhypen hyungs x gn!reader (rest under cut) GENRE. fluff, high school au, bullet points WORD COUNT. 1.8k total MAKNAE LINE VER.
이희승 — lee heeseung
varsity jackets, notes in lockers, late night calls, secret pining, basketball games
secretly (not so secretly) an attention seeker
he's on the varsity basketball team, so by law you're hyping him up (disguised as hyping up the whole team) before the game and now he has to win!!! (plus he made a bet with jay about the team's winning streak)
i'd think that you two are closer than acquaintances but don't know each other well enough to be close friends
you guys probably met through mutual friends groups that kind of merged????
it was junior year when he signed up for every ap class you took just to look at your face more often.
horrible move for his gpa, amazing move for his mental well-being
... that was, until his mental well-being was compromised again because his ap calc grades were... not sexy
"help like actually i don't think my coach will let me stay on the team if i fail another quiz like that 0.05% grade decrease might be the end of my career"
you start tutoring him not because you're super confident about your calc skills, but because 1) you're better than him at least 😂and 2) it's a free excuse to hang out with him after school
you guys have your first tutoring sessions over discord vc btw like LOSERS
"can you hear me okay"
"..."
"dude you're muted"
IT WAS BAD
he's got the popular guy on the outside, an absolute loser on the inside persona
like he's lowkey a romantically awkward dude
but once he got to know you a bit more from your 1 on 1 time (still on discord.) you guys got really close!
would talk shit together right before basketball matches too
"[name] make sure to start booing when the other team shows up because unfortunately i think they're actually really good"
you're really passionate about how the other schools have horrible players (regardless of stats) and love to narrate a play-by-play with heeseung after the match is over
he finally confessed to you after a whole business year (jake and riki were about to dox their private dms by then)
you guys are like those stereotypical high school movie it couples, where it seems like two gorgeous popular people fell in love
they don't need to know he's just a hopeless romantic!!
박종성 — park jongseong
blue ink, keyboard clicks, shared laughs, handwritten notes, guitar strings
you thought he was pretty intimidating at first ngl
first day of school and he has a whole pre-established friend group, somehow found a table to sit at, has an effortless air going for him
you were paired up with him for a group project in history and
god help this man is SO straightforward and to the point
"ok so i'll do this part and you can do those parts. let me know if you have questions."
insert working in SILENCE for the next hour and a half
at least you two got your work done though!
but then, as an icebreaker in the last ten minutes of class you asked:
"oh... so, uh, do you ever wonder how liquid soap was invented?"
girl wtf!
your internal thought processing was like ??? damn who said that??? before you realized it was YOU
fortunately for you, jay was not completely weirded out!
he even looked a bit interested!
VERY interested, actually!
and that's how he began google searching like crazy, pulling up a million wikipedia articles and scouring the internet to answer your question
because how did you know he was curious about that too!
he really went from 0 to 100 and wdym you thought this man was cold and stoic
he became a d1 yapper for a solid ten minutes, up until the second the bell rang
he was even subconsciously walking with you to your lunch spot, STILL talking about william sheppard and that day in 1865
when he stops and finally realizes where he is, he actually blinks a bit before asking if you had joined any lunchtime clubs
and you were like oh yeah!! i'm in guitar club
he looked at you with the biggest heart eyes at that tbh
HE WAS IN LOVE
wdym your interests were perfectly aligned???? was he in a soulmates au
fast forward three months, and he seriously thinks he's found The One
confesses to you after playing guitar!! and he wrote a handwritten letter too with a cheeky reference to that one liquid soap conversation that started it all
you never feel like you're being "too weird" when you're with him and you two can always be your candid goofy selves with each other :))
심재윤 — sim jaeyun
muji pens, fond eye rolls, sharing books, lunch dates, lattes, TI-84s
you already saw this one coming
physics lover jake, but you've deemed physics your number one opp
HOW can this man go "i love this subject so much omg" after you've just gotten your third 72% in a row?!
it's not like you weren't smart (the class average was a 55)
and it's not like you hated the subject itself
okay maybe you did
but you just thought there were so many other alternatives other than physics to fawn over as a favorite subject. like. ANY other subject
one day, you're seated next to jake in calc and he just turns to you and starts talking out of NOWHERE
he’s like wow isn’t this so interesting? calc is like a hobby of mine!!
and you’re like boy stfu??? i’m literally struggling how is this your pastime 
poor guy just wanted to make small talk and impress you with stuff he thought you were interested in… which is academics 
fast forward to that afternoon in history though, and tests are passed back
you're a certified humanities girl, so you got an 100!!! academic weapon
jake, however..... is kind of an academic shield in this case
on the midterm, he had written that the victorian era ended in 1592, and filled in everything else he didn't know with "mansa musa" because it was the only thing he retained from ap world
maybe you genuinely felt really bad for hating on him when he had struggles of his own, or maybe you felt really nice that day, or maybe you were secretly hoping to get to know him more....
either way, you don't know what came over you when you tapped on his shoulder
you missed how his eyes widened a bit when he turned around, and how he looked genuinely shocked that you were talking to him in an initiated conversation! maybe his rizz was working! (maybe it was)
"there's a method that i use to memorize terms that i could teach you, if you want"
IF HE WANTS??? he would've literally jumped with joy if the paper in front of him wasn't such a nuclear bomb to his gradebook
so that's how you suddenly started spending all your lunches sitting with jake at an empty table together
he tutors you back for physics and math too, so it's fair
and DAMN it works
suddenly you two are all-rounder academic weapons???? he has your back for STEM, you have his back for humanities
like that's literally a power couple right there.
only one problem.
you aren't a couple!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
you confess to him after one of your study sessions, by plotting a heart on the desmos graphing calculator using the equations that he taught you
it was super cute!!
he was literally the proudest and happiest man alive he teared up a bit (he would never admit it though)
and NOW you guys are the campus power couple
“babe look at this!” and he's waving at you with his 100 on the history final
he actually started jumping and hugging you (embarrassingly) when you found out you got a 94% average in physics at the end of the semester, giving you an A in the class
you were so shocked when you opened your report card that you didn't even register it until you heard jake go "YOOO OH MY GOD BABE THAT'S INSANE I KNEW YOU COULD DO IT YESSS I'M SO PROUD OF YOU"
well maybe thanks to jake the subject isn't so bad now!
박성훈 — park sunghoon
big school, comfortable silence, convenience stores, headphones, lingering gazes
the "everything kinda sucks here, except you" type of plot
sunghoon tries to stay out of the spotlight, keeping to himself with his head down, hood up, and headphones on
you're not really sure when you met him first actually, but you're both the same type of people where you're just going through the motions
you intrigued him though-- maybe it was the slightly melancholic look in your eyes? or maybe it was the way you purse your lips when you find a particularly hard question on the worksheets in class
either way, he finds himself wanting to get to know you more
funnily enough, he sees you at the convenience store after school as he walks home, and his feet start walking him in your direction
you see him first, and give him a smile and a little wave-- and sunghoon waves back without even thinking about it
that was the entire interaction that day, but sunghoon keeps replaying that part when you smiled and waved at him
why can't he stop thinking about it?
some things definitely changed too-- you start saying hi to him in the hallways at school, you turn to sunghoon to ask questions in class, and you seem to brighten up whenever you see him
you guys start to have conversations, starting with simple small talk, then moving to longer, more random dialogue where you both just say whatever comes to mind
the two of you become so close that you decide to walk to and from school together, since you found out that you only live a couple blocks away
sunghoon likes to place his headphones over your ears to show you new songs every morning, and you like to share earbuds in the afternoon to walk home together
he also starts to slip little notes about his day in your backpack before you go your separate ways in the neighborhood, signing off with a little p.s. to meet him at the park before sunset
it takes him SO long to muster up the courage to confess to you because he keeps thinking you'd say no
but when he finally does, all his fears melt away because you looked at him in such a soft way
he's actually reminded of why he fell for you in the first place
because with you, there’s no judgment from the outside world in the little bubble that you’ve created with him
it's just the two of you against the world <3
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TAGLIST : @star-sim @boyfiejay @jlheon @jwsdoll @dimplewonie @suneng @en-gelic
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chukys-mouthguard · 2 months ago
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what are the odds? | part two
matt rempe x female reader; featuring numerous side characters
social media au!
part 1
your.name.here
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liked by francesca.kreider, addison.clark, mattrempe and 230,429 others
your.name.here kinda got a thing for the boys in blue 💙
addison.clark she’s officially a garden girlie 🫶🏼
liked by your.name.here
-> your.name.here where do i get my official membership card 👀
-> addison.clark i think we’ve got a jacket coming your way 🫶🏼
user99344 so did the WAGs application get approved?!
liked by your.name.here and addison.clark
user21049 okay but like is she dropping hints??
-> user10485 i mean it’s not like she’s never been to games before…
-> user59384 yeah but these posts are a different vibe
-> user10485 she’s literally friends with some of the WAGS, chill
mattrempe I think you spelled boy wrong
mattrempe but I’ll let it slide cause I know it’s a hard word
-> your.name.here can you spell pain in my ass?
-> alleyrempe i can, m-a-t-t r-e-m-p-e
liked by your.name.here
-> your.name.here facts 😂
-> mattrempe once again, you both love ganging up on me
alleyrempe thanks for the live updates in the group chat🫶🏼
-> your.name.here always reporting live from inside the garden 🎤
user66437 wait, she’s got a group chat with his family?
-> user22445 it’s only confirmed alley is in it, but most likely his sisters and maybe his mom?
user22866 she was wearing a rempe jersey at the game 👀
-> user39838 no way!!
-> user22866 check my story, she’s in the background of my video
mattrempe
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liked by alleyrempe, tybauer_, your.name.here and 198,210 others
mattrempe don’t mess with the boys in blue 👊🏼
your.name.here omg can i get your autograph? I’m such a big fan 🥹
-> mattrempe you can have whatever you want 😉
this comment has been deleted by mattrempe
-> mattrempe autograph signing happening soon, stay tuned for details 👀
user29305 hell of a fight tonight 🙌🏼
user10494 king of new york 👑
user55049 dudes a beast
tybauer_ bare knuckle brawler on broadway 😤
liked by mattrempe
-> mattrempe boys always ready to drop em 🫡
your.name.here hmm, i think you spelled boy wrong 🤔
-> mattrempe hmm, i don’t think i did
-> your.name.here 🤦🏼‍♀️
-> your.name.here you can get your own ice for your hands then butthead 🙄
user30589 why’s he kinda hot with bloody knuckles though?
liked by your.name.here
-> user30558 just kinda? lol
alleyrempe mom said stop fighting or you’re grounded
-> mattrempe pretty sure I heard her say don’t get taken to the ground, never heard grounded 🤷🏻‍♂️
kandre.miller all business 💼
liked by mattrempe
chris.kreider book club got wild tonight!
liked by mattrempe and your.name.here
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bbyjackie · 1 year ago
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𝐒𝐎𝐂𝐈𝐀𝐋𝐒 𝐀𝐒... 𝐁𝐀𝐑𝐁𝐈𝐄 𝐖𝐈𝐓𝐇 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐒𝐓𝐑𝐀𝐖𝐇𝐀𝐓𝐒 — ♡
one piece social media feat: strawhats special appearance: whitebeard pirates, heart pirates, kid pirates
》 in honour of barbie!! (+ oppenheimer)
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♡ liked by nefertari_vivi, ace and 10.4k others
_ynln: barbie girls in the new world 🎀💄
[music: Beauty And A Beat - Justin Bieber, Nicki Minaj ♫]
tagged: p1rateking_luffy, lovenami, theroronoa.zoro, nicorobin, nefertari_vivi, sogekingg.usopp, blackleg.sanji, jinbe, ilovecottoncandychopper, S0U1K1NGBR00K, FRAAANKY
FRAAANKY: LETS GOOOOOOOOO 🔥🔥
nefertari_vivi: so happy to meet up with you guys again!! 💕
↳ _ynln: we missed u!
↳ lovenami: lets do it again!
↳ blackleg.sanji: YOU WERE SO BEAUTIFUL VIVI 💞💘❣️💕🥰😍
lovenami: we look so good omg ‼️
ace: CAN'T BELIEVE WE RAN INTO EACHOTHER
↳ _ynln: EEE IM SO GLAD YOU JOINED US!!
↳ p1rateking_luffy: HEHE IT WAS SO FUNNY WHEN U FELL ASLEEP ACE 😂
sogekingg.usopp: BEST DRESSED CREW IN THE NEW WORLD
trafalgar_d.law: it looked like you all copied doflamingo's style
↳ _ynln: PLEASE DELETE THIS B4 HE SEES IT I DONT WANT TO DIE🙏🙏
↳ p1rateking_luffy: HEHAHHA TRA GUY YOURE RIGHT
↳ doflamingo_: Looking good @_ynln
↳ _ynln: you're old enough to be my dad 😐
↳ doflamingo_: Add a dy to that
↳ theroronoa.zoro: more like you should dy off 😭😭 (liked by trafalgar_d.law, _ynln, sogekingg.usopp)
CAPTAIN.KIIIID: fire song choice (liked by _ynln, theroronoa.zoro)
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♡ liked by marco_o, iampops and 14.3k others
ace: ran into these losers 😪
tagged: _ynln, p1rateking_luffy
marco_o: so when you said you couldn't do cleaning duty, you were out watching barbie
↳ ace: And I'm bad like the Barbie (Barbie) I'm a doll, but I still wanna party (party) Pink 'Vette like I'm ready to bend (bend) I'm a ten, so I pull in a Ken
↳ marco_o: you need to be put down
_ynln: omg i made it on THE FIRE FIST ACE'S ig?! 🫢🫢
↳ ace: YOU WERE LITERALLY IN THE LAST PHOTO DUMP
↳ _ynln: NO WAY YOU POST ME IN THE SAME DUMP AS LUFFY AND EXPECT ME TO BE OKAY W THAT 🤨🤨
↳ ace: mb you're the no.1 fr 😌🤞
p1rateking_luffy: LERS DO A MOVIE NIGHT AGUIB WIEH SABU TOO
↳ saaaa_bo: real, if that's what you were trying to say
iampops: Sons, let's go watch barbie together
↳ ace: pops i ain't even gonna lie, there's no way we can bring you to the theatre and not have the marines after us 😭😭
↳ _ynln: ace YOU'RE the liability, i literally ran into the marines and they were offering me DOUBLE your bounty to turn you in
↳ lovenami: AND YOU DIDN'T DO IT?
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♡ liked by nojiko.ko, blackleg.sanji and 6.9k others
lovenami: glad this fit is boutta be on my new bounty poster 🤞
tagged: p1rateking_luffy, _ynln, nicorobin, nefertari_vivi
_ynln: nami nahh 💀 we were running for our LIVES
↳ themarineofficial: my mum told me to chase after my dreams (liked by _ynln, FRAAANKY, theroronoa.zoro)
↳ sogekingg.usopp: WHO TF HACKED INTO THE OFFICIAL MARINE IG LMFAOO 😭😭
↳ lovenami: scariest notification
trafalgar_d.law: luffy? more like goofy. why's he trying to rizz up the camera man like that
p1rateking_luffy: Tra guy what does rizz mean
↳ trafalgar_d.law: RIZZ: Another word for spitting game/how good you are with pulling and sustaining bitches. [Urban Dictionary]
↳ p1rateking_luffy: I GOT THAT ILLEGAL RIZZ 🤪🤪😇🙏🔥🔥
↳ _ynln: LUFFY WHAT
↳ lovenami: ?!!
↳ jinbe: ?
↳ trafalgar_d.law: wtaf
↳ p1rateking_luffy: Ace told me to say it :((
↳ saaaa_bo: ACE STOP RUINING LUFFY'S DIGITAL FOOTPRINT
↳ ace: GUYS OMG DONT HATE ON ME TBF HE PULLED HANCOCK AND SHES LIKE 30
blackleg.sanji: MY BEAUTIFUL GODDESSES IN ONE FRAME HOW DID I EVER GET THIS LUCKY TO BE BORN INTO THIS LIFE 💓💖💘🧡💕💖💗❤️
↳ p1rateking_luffy: I'm in the photo too!
↳ blackleg.sanji: sadly.
↳ _ynln: 😭
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♡ liked by sogekingg.usopp, BONBONBONCLAY and 12.7k others
p1rateking_luffy: Last nighT was fun
tagged: ace, theroronoa.zoro, _ynln, blackleg.sanji
ace: WHAT WERE YOU DOING TO ME?
↳ _ynln: dude you were GONE 😭
↳ p1rateking_luffy: HAAHGAHA DID YIUO SEE THE THINGFW WE DFEW ON YOURE FACE
↳ trafalgar_d.law: ever feel bad about yourself? think about luffy's spelling (liked by saaaa_bo)
lovenami: WHAT WERE YOU GUYS DOING TO YN AND ZORO IN THE SECOND PHOTO
↳ lovenami: WAIT WHEN WAS THE PHOTO EVEN TAKEN?
↳ p1rateking_luffy: Ryght after the marnjnes follqweod you g0uys instead
↳ sogekingg.usopp: aint no way i was fighting for life and these rats were having the time of their life 🫤🫤
↳ _ynln: 😝
↳ p1rateking_luffy: 😝
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♡ liked by killerrr, SOU1K1NGBR00K and 10.1k others
_ynln: strawhats take on oppenheimer next 🖤
tagged: p1rateking_luffy, lovenami, theroronoa.zoro, nicorobin, nefertari_vivi, sogekingg.usopp, blackleg.sanji, jinbe, ilovecottoncandychopper, S0U1K1NGBR00K, FRAAANKY
themarinesofficial: strawhat ladies and roronoa zoro i will need to arrest you for stealing my heart ❤️
↳ _ynln: LMFAO UM IM CRYING??!!
↳ nicorobin: This is slightly uncomfortable
↳ CAPTAIN.KIIIID: LMFAO THE WAY ZORO IS INCLUDED AHHAA
↳ blackleg.sanji: BACK OFF FROM THEM 🫵
↳ theroronoa.zoro: just crucify me again
sogekingg.usopp: OKAY BUT FR WHO HACKED INTO THEIR ACC 😭😭
↳ FRAAANKY: nah people in the marines just getting bored fr
ace: YOOO LETS MEET UP (liked by _ynln)
↳ p1rateking_luffy: @saaaa_bo COME TOO
2K notes · View notes
a-dauntless-daffodil · 4 months ago
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I remember reading someone say that they hope Seviathan ISN’T a jerk and if/when he comes to the hotel, he actually wants to help Charlie in her mission of redemption…then ends up with a crush on Vaggie, lol.
Mate, how funny would that be? 😂😂😂 You’re here to genuinely help your ex, then end up falling for her girlfriend. While it isn’t socially acceptable or appropriate, I think it’s cute. I guess Vags has that sort of affect on people.
oh man, if we go the absolute CHAD route for Sevi WHILE imagining him getting a crush on Vaggie... like, dude meets scary lady, doesn't notice how scary his EX gets over him staring at HER girlfriend, and maybe it's time for Sev to have some personal epiphanies?
Seviathan: "Knock knock? Yo Charles-a-lot! This really your hotel?"
Angel Dust: "Oh heyyy, look what the undead boy band dragged in..."
Husk: (snorts)
Charlie: "Sev? SEV! Holy shit what are you doing here!?"
Angel Dust: "Wait a sec, Sev? As in-"
Husk: "Oh shit."
Angel Dust: "Ex boyfriend on the hotel premises oh this is gonna get INTERESTIN'. Bet on how quick he gets maimed?"
Husk: "Fuck no. She'd kill us too."
Angel Dust: "Sigh... S'pose so. Spoil sport spear bitch..."
Seviathan: "I heard about your thing! Figured you could use a hand with the whole... uh... Sinner pet project obsession."
Charlie: "But Isn't there a game on right now-"
Seviathan: "Nah, everything's blocked out by replays of your little slap fight with heaven. Which I totally could've helped with too, if you'd given me a heads up first."
Charlie: "I did call? I said goodbye in case I died and-"
Seviathan: "Didn't hear it. You know I don't check voice mail. Everyone's always blowing up my inbox trying to to hit me up."
Angel Dust: "Oh my fucking gay."
Husk: "Would you hit that?"
Angel Dust: "If I did ya'd have to shoot me afterwards."
Seviathan: "Anyway, that's how I found out you'd actually went ahead and tried this thing out for real! And made a real mess of it. You totally cut off the final quarter of the best game of the year with all that live coverage."
Charlie: "Sorry, sorry- we REALLY didn't have say in the timing on that-"
Husk: "No shit."
Seviathan: "Eh. The team's played like shit anyway ever since I left."
Charlie: "Didn't you get kicked off for hogging the ball-"
Angel Dust: "Shocker."
Husk: "Never would have fucking guessed."
Seviathan: "Not dropping the ball isn't the same as hogging it and I never drop the ball on anything. You sure have though!"
Charlie: "I have? Where? Or er with what??"
Seviathan: "This hotel lobby for a start. Where's the billiards table!"
Charlie: "Ohhh. We don't have one."
Seviathan: "Why the hell not???"
Charlie: "No one's asked?"
Seviathan: "Well what the fuck does everyone here DO all day long? You've got actual people staying here, right? You're not still playing pretend hostess to stuffed animals and stuff?"
Angel Dust: "I kinda hope Vaggisaurus kills him."
Husk: "Don't get your hopes up. You know she's whipped and Charlie's a fucking sweetheart."
Angel Dust: "A bestie can dream..."
Charlie: "No I am NOT playing pretend hostess, thanks for mentioning it by the way, in public, in front of my friends- and yes we DO have guests at the hotel! Some of them here of their own free will even!"
Husk: "Not it."
Angel Dust: "Bullshit."
Charlie: "They have lots of fun activity time too! Even when we're not doing talk circles!"
Seviathan: "Uh huh."
Charlie: "Yes! Mostly we all like watching TV- well almost all of us- or listening to the radio to pass the time, or hanging out chatting, or reading-"
Seviathan: "So they're pussies."
Husk: "Hey."
Angel Dust: "Down, pussycat~"
Husk: (HISS)
Charlie: "They are NOT-"
Angel Dust: "Speakin' of pussy...."
Seviathan: "Yeah we're talking about you, what about it? Anyway."
Seviathan: (puts hand on charlie's arm)
Angel Dust: "Here it comes-"
Seviathan: "I've been thinking about us lately, and-" (spear thuds next to his head) "-SHIT!!! HOLY SHIT?!?!"
Husk: "Damn. She missed."
Angel Dust: "Just an openin' shot, Mr. Whiskers." (rubs all four hands together) "Oh this is gonna be goooood~"
Charlie: "Vaggie!" (BEAMING) "I thought we talked about this?"
Vaggie: (swoops down) "He's not a gust yet, babe, so I can greet him spear first if I want to."
Charlie: "Sev's my ex boyfriend though!"
Vaggie: "I know."
Vaggie: (yanks spear out of wall and holds it under his throat) "What the fuck are you doing here."
Seviathan: "I, uhh- is, is that angelic steel..?"
Charlie: (laughing) "Vaggieeee. You're scaring him~"
Angel Dust: "An' turnin' her on."
Husk: (elbows him)
Vaggie: "We said hotel security would be my thing until the threat of random asshole angel attacks went down, remember hun? This is my day job."
Charlie: "I never said I was complaining! Juuuust commentating!"
Vaggie: "Alright then."
Vaggie: (backs Seviathan against wall with her spear)
Vaggie: "Talk. Now."
Seviathan: (swallows hard) "I'm swinging by to help Charlie with the hotel thing-"
Vaggie: "Why."
Seviathan: "She used to be my girl, a guy's got a responsibility-"
Vaggie: "Did she ask you to."
Seviathan: "No? She, she doesn't have to-"
Vaggie: "Did you ask her if you could help."
Seviathan: "It's no trouble, I don't mind a little extra work-"
Vaggie: "Are you here to ask for a room in our hotel."
Seviathan: "In this place? Fuck no, you should see the digs I have, I've got a-"
Vaggie: "So you're trespassing."
Angel Dust: "Ohhh!"
Seviathan: "I'm wha-"
Husk: "Fucking screwed."
Vaggie: "You came here just to swan all over her hard work and stroke your own ego, is what I'm hearing."
Seviathan: "Hey girl, I'm here to he-ULP-!"
Vaggie: "Shut up." (over shoulder) "Charlie?"
Charlie: "Mm....wellllll... Since he's already here, as long he really does help, I'm fine with it. He's harmless. He'd just... um..."
Husk: "A fuckhead."
Angel Dust: "Don't take my fav word in vain, baby."
Charlie: "He's my ex for a reason."
Husk: "Fuck you."
Angel Dust: "Much better."
Vaggie: "He's your ex for an annoying reason, or for being an actual jerk who's earned getting kicked out on his ass for once in his life kinda reason, sweetie?"
Nifty: (popping up from floorboards) "Is he a BAAAAD BOYYYY~?"
Seviathan: "WHAT THE FUCK IS THAt-"
Vaggie: "What part of shut up there's a spear at your throat don't you get."
Seviathan: (jaw clicks shut)
Charlie: "Nope! He's not a boy boy! Just annoying! Mostly."
Nifty: "DAMN IT."
Angel Dust: "How's the huntin' goin' today, Nif?"
Nifty: (pouts) "The last baby bug got away... I hadn't even finished ripping it's little legs off while the mother bug watched it squirm..." (slinks back under floor)
Everyone else: "....."
Charlie: "... so! (claps hands)
Charlie: "Sev, if you really wanna help out that's fine, we're still finishing up the last touches on the new hotel if you feel like doing a little paint work and furniture moving!"
Seviathan: "....."
Charlie: "Sev?"
Seviathan: "..."
Angel Dust: "Think we broke him."
Husk: "I think it's the fucking spear pressed up against his fucking windpipe."
Charlie: "Oh! Whoops. Vaggie, please?"
Vaggie: ".... fiiiine."
Vaggie: (steps back) (wipes spear on nearby curtains) "Answer her."
Seviathan: (staring) "What's your name?"
Vaggie: "Hotel manager. Answer her."
Seviathan: "Charlie-" (still staring at vaggie) "-I would LOVE to help set up your pet sinner terrarium thing!"
Vaggie: "Our WHAT."
Husk & Angel Dust: "Hey!"
Charlie: "It's a hotel, Sev."
Seviathan: "Uh huh yeah sure, that thing!"
Vaggie: (lifts spear)
Charlie: (gently pushes gf spear back down) "Oh I'm going to regret this... ok. Let's, get you some gloves and stuff."
Seviathan: "Alright!" (holds hand up to vaggie) "Give me some skin!"
Vaggie: "...." (lifts spear again)
Charlie: "Excuse us Sev just ONE moment!"
Charlie: (pulls gf safe distance away)
Charlie: "Vaggie..? You okay?"
Vaggie: "Fine."
Charlie: "You're eye's, um. Twitching." (tenderly brushes fringe away from gf's eye) "Are you okay with this? He doesn't have to stay."
Vaggie: "No. It's fine." (sighs) "I want to be okay with it."
Charlie: "It's okay if you're not!"
Vaggie: "I will be, sweetie. Just give me a minute." (leans up for kiss) "But. I need to go do a Niffty and stab something. Really hard. Right now. And if I stay here one minute more, it's gonna be him."
Charlie: "Okay." (giggles) "Have fun stabbing things that aren't my ex?"
Vaggie: "I'll try to."
Seviathan: "Oh hey I'm awesome at stabbing! And the thrusting!"
Angel Dust: "PLEASE stick around, toots."
Husk: (mumbling) "Please fucking stick him."
Seviathan: "Long hard things are totally my thing, I could give you a few pointers on handling them no problem!"
Vaggie: "No."
Seviathan: "Oh come on, how about a hands on demonstration-"
Vaggie: (at charlie) "Keep him away from the kitchen knifes. He looks like he'd stab himself showing off and make a mess."
Charlie: "Heheh~ I'll try to."
Vaggie: "Good luck with that babe." (smooches her) (flies off to go stab)
Seviathan: "...."
Seviathan: "She single?"
Charlie: "She- NO? She is not??"
Angel Dust: (whisper hissing) "Is he blind? Didn't they just kiss???"
Seviathan: "We'll she's gonna be single soon, but not for long."
Husk: "He's dead."
Demon Charlie: "Her girlfriend is ME, Seviathan."
Seviathan: "Girlfriend? So she's-"
Demon Charlie: "VERY VERY GAY and TAKEN, YES."
Seviathan: "Wait, with you? Seriously??"
Demon Charlie: "Yes. Me. For s e v e r a l. Happy. Years."
Husk: (lifts bottle) "Cheers motherfuckers."
Seviathan: "Ohhh, so all that making out with you she did, it wasn't just her flirting with m-"
Angel Dust: "Holy. Fuck."
Demon Charlie: "SHE WASN't FLIRTING WITH YOU! SHE LOVES ME- SHE WANTS TO KILL YOU!!!"
Seviathan: "I'd let her, to be honest. She's hot."
Husk: "Let her?"
Angel Dust: "Dude."
Husk: "The fuck does he mean, let her? He wouldn't have a fucking choice-"
Demon Charlie: "On second thought maybe you SHOULD'NT help out with the hotel, actually!"
Demon Charlie: (grabbing him by scruff of the neck and marching towards door) "It was VERY nice of you to drop by, PLEASE go have a good rest of your life, you'll probably have a LONGER one if you live it away from here!"
Seviathan: "Aww Charlie, getting nervous over having competition?"
Husk: (spits out drink)
Demon Charlie: "You are SOOOOOO not competition! You might end up being another hotel fatality though!"
Angel Dust: "Bet on which of 'em kills him first?"
Husk: "Shut up I'm trying to listen."
Seviathan: "I just think a woman like that should have her pick from the best hell can offer!"
Demon Charlie: "I'm the princess of hell???"
Seviathan: "Sure, but you hardly ever act like it."
Demon Charlie: "I...! She, she doesn't mind me being like me. She-"
Seviathan: "What, a commanding woman like that is fine with a spineless partner? No offence. But come on."
Angel Dust: "Alright, now I'm gonna kill him."
Husk: "Let her do it herself."
Angel Dust: "Hmph!"
Seviathan: "She's never asked you to try being more of an actual princess sometimes?"
Demon Charlie: "No, she... Not like, not like that..."
Seviathan: "Not like that, huh?"
Demon Charlie: "No." (yanks open door) "And our relationship has NOTHING to do with you."
Seviathan: (grabbing doorframe) "But you know it could."
Demon Charlie: "NO IT WON'T. COULDN'T! WILL NOT, EVER!!!!"
Seviathan: "So why're you throwing me out of your silly hotel thing, then?"
Demon Charlie: "....."
Seviathan: "Scaaaared...?"
Demon Charlie: (drops him) (shuts door) "I trust her."
Seviathan: "Said like no one who ever got dumped so their girl could be with me."
Demon Charlie: "I trust her not to ACTUALLY kill you, I mean."
Seviathan: "Fuck I hope she tries... Maybe I'll let her pin me again."
Husk: (SNORTS) "'Let her'..."
Angel Dust: "He's gonna earn a fucking Darwin award at this rate."
Seviathan: (dusting ash off himself) "Kinda impressed you got all demon-ed so fast for this though. That's new!"
Charlie: "I've told you, it only happens when I'm PISSED. OFF."
Angel Dust: "YEAH DOLLFACE GET HIS ASS!"
Seviathan: "I know but like, it used to take a lot to get you all riled up. I hardly ever got to see you like this in bed even. Maybe if it'd been easier we'd still be a thing?"
Charlie: "You know I realllly really doubt it since I dumped YOU."
Husk: "HA!"
Angel Dust: "WOOOOO! BURRRRRN!"
Charlie: "And I dumped you partly BECAUSE you kept trying to 'rile me up' so you could try having sexy scary demon sex with me!"
Angel Dust: "OHHHHH!!!!"
Charlie: "Not that you ever even DID!"
Husk: "Fuck yes."
Charlie: "Because I always had waaaaay more fun sleeping on the COUCH!"
Husk & Angel Dust: (high five)
Seviathan: "...."
Seviathan: "So that's a no to having a threesome with us once I'm dating your soon to be ex girlfriend, huh?"
Demon Charlie: "SEV-"
Charlie: (deep breath)
Charlie: "... why do you even think you like her, Seviathan? You don't know her. She doesn't like you. You don't even know her name."
Seviathan: "She's hot."
Charlie: "Can We Try To Be More Specific, Please."
Seviathan: "I don't know? It was cute how she tried bullying me against a wall like that. All snapping orders like she was some kinda drill sergeant, or like a hot coach lady, treating me like some kinda bug crawling by her shoe- Who doesn't think that's hot?"
Charlie: "...."
Charlie: "Ohhhh."
Angel Dust: "Oh FUCK!"
Husk: (laughing) "The motherfucking alpha man-"
Angel Dust: "He's a fucking sub!!!!"
Seviathan: "What, like the sandwich? Shit. Are my pants fitting too tight again-"
Charlie: "Angel Dust."
Angel Dust: "Yesssss oh fearless leader...?
Charlie: (covers eyes) (turns) (escapes)
Charlie: "He's all yours."
Seviathan: "Whoa wait, where're you going-"
Charlie: "I'm gonna go surprise MY longtime girlfriend with kisses!"
Seviathan: "Hold on don't leave me with these two! Charlie!?"
Charlie: (already gone)
Seviathan: "For fuck's sake then I'm outta here too! I didn't come here to hang out with lame guys-"
Angel Dust: "Oh my little baby boy."
Angel Dust: (grins) (leans in) ".....how's the idea of a woman standin' over you with a whip make ya feel?"
Seviathan: "Good?"
Angel Dust: "Mm-hmm. An' if ya was wearing a collar?"
Seviathan: "..." (takes off hat) (holds it over crotch)
Husk: "Great. Another horrible memory to drown away with booze." (swigs)
Angel Dust: (draping arm around seviathan) "C'mon, let's find ya a dom who WON'T for real rail you with her spear~"
Seviathan: "Oh whoa."
Husk: "Oh fucking save me booze..." (down in one)
Niffty: (sobbing under floorboards)
Husk: "What the fuck? What's wrong with you?"
Niffty: "Th-the bad boys..." (sniffling) "... why are so many of them turning out LAME? Even the king of HELL asked me if I was OKAY when he stepped out his door in his ducky slippers and found me lying in front of it like a rug! WHAT IS WRONG WITH BAD MEN THESE DAYS!?"
Husk: "...."
Husk: "Here."
Husk: (hands down drink)
Niffty: (hands popping out to grabby grabby) "IT'S SO SAAAAAD HUSK!" (snatches) (gulps) (gulps) (faint thump and snoring)
Husk: "I can't fucking believe I risked my fucking life for this place."
Husk: (smiles anyway)
184 notes · View notes
drysdalesworld · 11 months ago
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completely serious
jamie drysdale x fem!hughes!reader
ik the third pic is him wearing a ducks jersey but there’s nothing really of him in flyers gear that fit what i was looking for, so let’s just pretend <3
y/n.hughes just posted!
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liked by trevorzegras, jackhughes, and more
y/n.hughes: to a new era baby! hope philly treats you well 🧡🧡 (please take care of him flyers or i will violently cry)
tagged: jamie.drysdale, philadelphiaflyers
( loading comments ! )
trevorzegras: i too will violently cry
lhughes_06: so this is where you took your impromptu trip to
y/n.hughes: & what about it
userone: still can’t believe it tbh 😭
yourbestie: she very much will! philadelphiaflyers
yourroommate: she cried upon hearing the news
philadelphiaflyers: we will take great care of jamie! do not worry 🧡
philadelphiaflyers: we will make sure to water him daily & make sure he gets enough sunlight 🫡
usertwo: stopp!! the way they are describing him as a house plant 😂 i cant
mfrost16: we’ll take him out on walks too!
userthree: now he’s a dog 😭😭
userfour: i mean he did bark his first game with the flyers userthree
jackhughes: i will not be picking up the pieces if she starts to violently sob
lhughes_06: you never do
_quinnhughes: i do that
_quinnhughes: when have you ever done that bro
jackhughes: i feel attacked rn
userfive: the way the flyers flew BOTH y/n & jamie’s parents out for his first game 😭😭 warms my heart
usersix: they did?
userfive: yep! during his post game interview, someone asked if the flyers flew anyone else out for jamie & he said that he wouldn’t play if they didn’t fly y/n out as well! (jokingly of course)
usersix: that’s so freaking cute 😖
jamie.drysdale: i was completely serious userfive
philadelphiaflyers: he, in fact, was completely serious userfive
userseven: UGH GOALS 💞💞
usereight: they’ll treat him well y/n!
jamie.drysdale: i’ll miss you so much love 🤍 i’ll have the flyers fly you out whenever (& if not, then i will)
y/n.hughes: i’ll miss you more!! im so so proud of you & can’t wait to see the amazing things you’ll accomplish in philly ❤️❤️
philadelphiaflyers: y/n’s apart of the team already! we’ll fly her out whenever you want jim! just say the word ✈️✈️
y/n.hughes just posted!
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liked by luca.fantilli, masonmctavish23, and more
y/n.hughes: jamie photo dump during these trying & sad times
tagged: jamie.drysdale
( loading comments ! )
trevorzegras: the fifth picture is evil y/n. why you got to do my boy like that? (please send it to me asap)
y/n.hughes: check your messages babes 😚
trevorzegras: bless girl hughes ����🙏
userone: another shoe tying pic!!!
lhughes_06: uhhh, why am i not tagged in the sixth pic?? i so graciously taught your bf how to wake board & this is the thanks i get??
y/n.hughes: thank you so much luke for teaching my boyfriend how to wake board & almost kill him in the process 😑
lhughes_06: i am an amazing teacher! he did not almost die
jackhughes: dude, you almost broke his nose when you both went down after YOU jumped on him
lhughes_06: i do not recall such a thing
jamie.drysdale: i will let the fifth picture slide just this once bc i miss & love you so much 🥰 (also, almost died in the last pic 💀)
jackhughes: SEE!! lhughes_06
lhughes_06: 🎶 i cant see i’m blinnndddd🎶👨‍🦯
y/n.hughes: love & miss you more 🤍🫶🏼
_quinnhughes: the lake house that summer will forever be burned into my brain
usertwo: in a good way? 😀
userthree: THE FUCKING ‘I ❤️ MY GIRLFRIEND’ TSHIRT 😫😫😫😫😫
yourroommate: i specifically remember the first pic like it was yesterday
userfour: babes spill! what happened!!
yourroommate: y/n was not having a good week so jamie flew out for the weekend & showed up with flowers & wearing that exact shirt userfour
yourbestie: he said, and i quote, “i saw this shirt on tiktok & though you’d like it” & y/n proceeded to cry :) userfour yourroommate
y/n.hughes: why am i and my bf being exposed in this comment thread?? 🙃
userfive: WHY IS NO ONE TALKING ABOUT THE GOLF PIC 😫😫
y/n.hughes just posted to their story!
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caption: from #6 to #9, here’s to new beginnings! jamie.drysdale
420 notes · View notes
o-sachi · 5 months ago
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Isagi Yoichi ₊⊹ Headcanons
ଳ Character; Isagi Yoichi (Bllk)
ଳ Tags; (random) regular/platonic hcs
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— He’s the type of person who avoids stepping on the cracks on the sidewalk whenever he goes out on his usual walks. Whenever he does accidentally step on a crack, he lets out an audible ‘tsk’ and is a bit annoyed by the fact.
— On the top shelf of his cabinet, there’s a reused cookie tin where he chucks all the cool rocks he found on his walks. He has had the thing since childhood and now he doesn’t know what to do with it. So it has been collecting dust there and he’s pretending that it doesn’t exist.
— He’s a plain texter, but not a dry one. The only shortcuts he uses are otw, brb, ty, and btw. He’s guilty of overusing this emoji 🙂 and he unironically uses this one 😊. He uses both in a non-sarcastic manner. His top 5 emojis are: 🙂👍🏻😂😕⚽️
— His room is neat and tidy which his parents constantly praise him for. However, the colors are a bit dull. The only eye-catching area would be his manga shelf. He’s proud of his collection and enjoys rearranging it whenever he buys new manga. He arranges them by genre, so he can easily find something to read to fit his mood.
— He is a MAJOR sweet tooth. He’d eat sweets exclusively all day if he could. The only thing that’s stopping him was that one time he got extremely sick after eating too much kintsuba as a little kid. “Moderation is key,” he’d say while eating sweets.
— Despite being a sweet tooth, he’s not a picky eater. He eats anything his mother cooks which he is praised for as well. He doesn’t particularly hate any kind of food, but he’d prefer not to have bitter stuff. Even though he’s an active and growing dude, he isn’t much of a big eater. He actually gets full pretty fast.
— He likes to tell dad jokes which he stole learned from his dad. His personal favorite (which makes him chuckle a bit before saying it) is, “What has 4 wheels and flies? A garbage truck!” The only person who has laughed at that joke was his younger cousin that came to visit them at their house some time ago.
— His parents keep an odd doodle of a cyborg-looking creature picture framed in their kitchen. It was one of Isagi’s drawings from when he was just 6 years old. He gifted it to his mom on her birthday because he thought she loved his art.
— His biggest pet peeve is people who chew loudly. Somehow he can hear it more compared to other people. It irks him so much to the point that it makes him lose appetite altogether. He usually eats faster, so that he can relieve himself of those horrid sounds.
— Whenever he goes to the mall, there are 3 places he absolutely needs to visit. The first one is the sporting goods store so he can check out some new football equipment he might like. The second one is the 100¥ store (dollar store). He likes to look for cool trinkets and kitchen tools for his mom or tools for repair for his dad. Lastly, he has to go to the sweets shop that sells his favorite kintsuba.
— Much like on the field, it’s like Isagi transforms into a different person whenever he’s playing multiplayer games. It doesn’t matter if it’s the enemy or his teammate—they’re all catching some fire.
— Sometimes he can’t fall asleep quickly because he’s thinking up of scenarios (he does this to fall asleep quicker, but it has the opposite effect). He likes to repeat events if they didn’t turn out well or if it wasn’t as vivid as he wanted it to be.
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ε( ε ˙³˙)ɜ 。° ⚬ 。 Likes and reblogs are appreciated
o-sachi © 2024
193 notes · View notes
luffyvace · 10 months ago
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MORE LUFFY RELATIONSHIP HEADCANONS
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Yeahhh!!! Luffy hcs we’re what my first ever hcs were about! Look how far I’ve come! I love Luffy and I’m so proud of myself! enjoy these Luffy hcs lovely readers <3
Bathing together is SUPER FUN
and messy
you have lots (too many) bubbles
and yes bath toys
even stuff that’s not supposed to be in the bath-
like sticks-
let him tell it they’re swords
he personally doesn’t bathe bc he doesn’t care
even if its mandatory seeing as though no one wants to smell all that funk 😀
so he canonly bathes once a week right??
with you !! He can bathe at any time!
why? Cuz it’s funn 😆😆
you turn it into a game! an adventure!
so now he looks forward to bath time ;3
luffy splashes water everywhere
I wouldn’t be surprised if the ceiling is drenched with that dude’s strength 😂🤦‍♀️
it takes you FOREVER to clean up
but you know what takes even longer?? GETTING HIM OUT THE BATH
”AWWW but we were having sooo much FUUUUN (NAAAAAME)”
actually it did take a long time til you found a cheat code 😋
tell him sanji’s making food!!
ez way to get him out 😎
The final boss tho??
is getting him to help out with cleaning the mess up
especially after you told him there’s food around🧍‍♀️
Now bro’s DEFINITELY not listening 🙉
unless you use another cheat code (saying you’ll tell sanji not to give him any meat til he helps clean up)
your not getting any help buddy..
he’s already gone by the time you get him out the bath 🤷‍♀️
but again! If you use cheat code no.2 you can get him to help :)
which leads me to…!
Cleaning together !!
which turns into a game too :P
well, more like a competition-
Because that’s the only way you’ll keep him from getting bored and complaining instead of actually cleaning
even with meat on the line 🤭
‘it’s just so boriiiiiiiing ☹️‘
- according to luffy
so yes! You propose a competition!
and whoever cleans the fastest wins the prize of…….you guessed it! MEAT!
now he’s up like a whirlwind, swiping up all the soap with a towel and water with tissue 😏
you probably don’t even have to do anything anymore 😜
he may have won the battle but you won the war
eating together can also sometimes be a competition
now you can win by playing it smart like Uta
or just agree so he can leave you to eat, without actually trying
but if it’s not a competition…it’s certainly a war..
and I mean the dangerous one every straw hat goes through each time sanji calls in for food..
Luffy stealing your food!!!
😦😦
no but seriously, not even you, Luffy’s s/o gets the benefit of the doubt⁉️
it’s every man for himself in the dining room 😂😂
if your intelligent, depending on if your more like Robin or Nami you’ll either be unbothered about his antics or super annoyed
with being unbothered you’ll have a lot more peace of mind
and luffy will probably get away with more of his tomfoolery because you put up with him 😆👍
however with a s/o more like nami who gets annoyed easily, yeah he’s not getting away with any of that
thankfully for her, nami has less to stress over now (you take 50% it’s a requirement)
If your more carefree like luffy
i can guarantee you’ve got on like every straw hats nerves at least once
oddly enough I have a feeling you haven’t been able to bother brook just yet
dude’s 90 he got bigger problems..
but yes you terrorize everyone (even outside the straw hats) whether it’s intentional or not
if your strong it’s a relief for luffy not to have to worry about you and he’ll send you to defeat some guys, protect the ship or protect one of your weaker Nakama
he highly believes in you and your capabilities likes he believes in Zoro 👍
he also doesn’t have to worry about strong attacks hurting you as badly or if you go off on your own/get lost or separated or smth
especially as his s/o
if your weak he probably worries about you a little bit more but all the straw hats can handle themselves to some sort of extent
and he knows for sure you won’t go down without a fight!
and that you can at least hold over until he gets there
then he’ll beat the crap outta those guys!
he always tells someone strong to go with you to fights or what might be dangerous
if he doesn’t have to be somewhere for some reason, he’ll go himself!
he just wants to know your safe :)
Luffy loves you because your you! and he really just appreciates that fact in itself.
he looks past physical appearances completely and goes straight for personality
and even then he doesn’t judge that!
point is, no matter what type of anything you are, Luffy loves you because he just does.
he gets a funny feeling in his stomach and he gets extra excited!
Luffy loves you.
He simply does.
and there’s no explaining why.
These were short but sweet<3
to which i hope you enjoyed them💗
259 notes · View notes
scekrex · 9 months ago
Note
WAIT HOLD ON, I GOT ANOTHER. BWOAH
The Heavenly team of Exterminators playing hide and seek as a training to find demons if they hide somewhere and they only choose like a couple of people to hide before they start searching for them. Reader being on of the people chosen to hide, the problem is he hid so well that they can't find him. Reason for that being his amazing hiding skills that made him choose to hide in some sort of a chamber that there was only one way in, but it was hidden, so unless you knew how to get in and if you even knew it was there, you wouldn't know how to find the guy. Adam getting concerned where his husband went since they've been searching for him for a good hour and still couldn't find him before he hears a ding from his phone an a video message from reader "An hour in the chamber, they haven't found me yet, but when they do, they gon' be surprised" and Adam just having a whole ass "What the fuck, where is your stupid ass??" moment with reader just replaying "Bitch call me, I'm stuck just come get me out" and directing him to the chamber 😂😂
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Okay hear me out: airtag for reader NOW bc otherwise Adam might lose that dude for good (no he won't bc reader will always find back to him but it causes a panic attack almost every time) also I live for the Adam pics you always send w ur asks
Constant Headache
pairing: Adam x male!reader
warnings: language, yet another crack fic
note: not beta read bc fuck you I don't have beta readers
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“Soldiers,” Lute yelled as she slowly walked towards the group of exorcists. If you were to be honest you didn't even fully understand how you had managed to become one of them, Adam had a pretty strict ‘women only’ rule when it came to his army, on the other hand had your husband never been fully able to tell you ‘no’, he had always given in sooner or later.
“Today’s practice will be about spotting and fighting the demons that think are clever by hiding from us,” she smashed her fist on the palm of her hand, “But we're smarter. And in order to spot hiding demons, you will be divided into two groups. The ones that will be hiding and doing their best to stay hidden, we want this to be as realistic as possible after all so once you've been spotted, put up a fight. And the ones who will seek for those hidden.” You looked up from your nails and raised an eyebrow at Lute, “So what you're saying is we're playing hide and seek, gotcha. Y'all get ready to suck dick because I will win this bullshit.”
Lute sighed heavily as she pinched the bridge of her nose and shook her head at you, “No, Y/N, we're not playing fucking- Adam,” she turned towards the first man, who was currently busy on his phone. Once his name was called out he looked up in confusion though, the LED face on his mask seemed slightly annoyed by Lute's attitude, “Huh?” That caused the exorcist to groan loudly and she threw her head in her neck to underline her emotions, “Tell your little fucktoy that we're not playing hide and seek.” Adam turned his phone off and let it disappear in his pocket before crossing his arms over his chest, “First of all, don't fucking disrespect my husband like that, only I'm allowed to call him my fucktoy,” Lute shot you a warning glace as she saw the shit eating grin on your face, you flipped her off and mouthed a silent, “Yeah bitch, fucking respect me.” With every day that she got to spend with the two of you she understood more and more why you were married. The two of you were equally obnoxious. “Second, bitch what do you want from me, this is literally a game of hide and seek, babes is right about that one.” ‘When was babes not right about something,’ Lute thought but remained silent. Instead she turned to face the group again, ignoring Adam's words skillfully. “Anyways, group A, you will be given ten minutes to hide, once the ten minutes are over group B will start their seeking. Good luck,” and with that she started a timer.
You lazily walked over to Adam, who was back to playing some shitty mobile game, “Hey big guy, if you manage to find me soon we might have a little time for a quickie.” It was needless to say that that caught Adam's attention immediately but before he had the slightest chance to answer you, you pushed yourself off the ground. “Where the fuck are you even going,” the first man yelled at you, you turned around mid air to look at him from above, “Find out, if ya find me I'll suck your dick.” And that was s promise to Adam's liking.
You took off, already knew where to hide. It was a little chamber that you had found a couple hundred years ago. You weren't quite sure how you had stumbled across it but ever since then you have made it your little man cave and whenever you felt overwhelmed you simply went there to calm yourself down and escape from the bright colors of heaven for a few hours. The chamber only had one entrance and it was hidden behind ivy vines.
All in all it was a cozy little place and a comfortable hiding spot, you also doubted that anyone would find you there and that was a simple win in your book, you'd win that game of hide and seek just to shove it in Lute's face. Yeah Lute… that was a thing you didn't like to think or talk about lately. Ever since the extermination day got closer she became insufferable. The training schedule was tight, jokes seemed to be forbidden and she treated everyone like they were garbage - sometimes even Adam. Usually the exorcist was fun to have around, she'd be up for one or two stupid decisions and would crack the most unfiltered jokes but with extermination day being in two months she just threw all of her likable traits away to become that bossy bitch that hated on everyone, no matter how well they were doing.
You sighed as you sat down on the cold yet dry ground and waited. It would probably take a while for one of them - probably your husband - to reach out for you and check where the fuck you were. So you took out your phone and checked social media.
In the meantime Adam was having a crisis, he had looked behind every rock, in every tree, fuck he had even searched for you on the bottom of the river at that point. But you were nowhere in sight. “Where the fuck is that bitch,” he mumbled to himself as he checked a tiny cave he had just discovered but nothing. “Someone’s mad he won't get a blowie?” Lute's grin was audible and it caused Adam to sigh in annoyance, “Fuck off, Lute.” She dropped the grin and got serious again at that, “Actually Sir, I'm here to inform you that all exorcists had been found, well all but Y/N.” That made the first man worry even more and a little bit of panic was noticeable in his voice when he ordered Lute to tell the exorcists to look for his husband. The lieutenant executed the order given to her within a heartbeat.
An hour passed and there was still no sign of you, that was until a notification popped up on Adam's phone screen.
‘Babes has sent you a video.’
The brunette opened it immediately and frowned as he watched the video of you showing off the chamber you were hiding inside, “An hour in the chamber, they haven't found me yet,” your voice sounded quite pleased with that result as you flipped the camera to grin at it, “But when they do, they gon’ be surprised as fuck.” Adam started at the screen for a moment, then he smashed his fingers down onto the digital keyboard, typing out in all caps, ‘What the fuck, where's your stupid ass???’
It only took you a moment to respond, a voice message this time, “So y’know, maybe I'm stuck in that man cave of mine,” Adam looked irritated at that, was he supposed to know where that said man cave was? Had he missed something? “Just fucking call me and I'll give ya the directions, get me the fuck outta here I'm starving.” Adam turned to look at Lute who shrugged apathetically, “Your bitch not mine.” Fucking great.
So Adam called you and you directed him to where you were still hiding. It took the first man quite a while to both get his ass there and find the entrance but once he did, you were already waiting there for him. “Okay just grab me and pull me out,” you mumbled as you reached for his hand. He grabbed your forearm firmly and did as he had been told.
As soon as you were out you cockily leaned against his side, “Took ya a while.” Adam grumbled something about your hiding spot being unfair but you ignored that, instead you asked, “So, did I win?” The first human soul in heaven rolled his eyes at that, “Yeah, yeah you won.” You patted his chest as you walked past him, “Awesome, now let's go so I can shove it in Lute's face.” Adam simply followed you, “What about my blowjob though?” You turned around to face him, a small grin on your lips, “If you behave like the good boy we both know you can be I'll blow you when we're back home.”
And in that moment Adam was really fucking thankful for his mask because while he was sure you knew he was blushing, you had no proof for that. “Fucking fine,” he whined but you knew as much as he did that it was just an act. So the two of you flew back to Lute and the others.
“What the fuck took you so long?” Lute snapped at Adam once the man had set his foot on the ground next to her, you were quick to jump in tho, “Dickmaster here had been busy shoving his cock down my throat, now we're here so shut up and give us the next task already, hide and seek was way to fucking easy.”
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simp-and-shift · 2 years ago
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Brother's Best Friend : Instagram AU
paring: Pierre Gasly x Leclerc!reader
notes: Hey guys, this is my first post, so here we go! hope you enjoy!
summary: pierre gasly and leclerc!reader launch their relationship after the monaco gp.
warnings: protective older brother charles, theats to unalive someone (doesn't happen)
y/n.leclerc
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y/n.leclec: monaco gp photo dump
charlesleclerc: who are the flowers from
arthurleclerc: oooh you in trouble
lorenzoleclerc: WHO !?!?!
y/n.leclerc: get out my comments or I'm telling mom 😤
user1: family drama in the comments I live for it 🙃
user5: PIERRE LIKED
user3: it is his best friends sister, not that weird
pierregasly: stealing my photo dumps now huh? 😡
y/n.leclerc: never pear 😳
pierregasly: at least put yuki in the next one
yukitsunoda: y/n I'll send you my best pics 📸
pierregasly
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pierregasly: never disappoint monaco 🇲🇨
user6: WHTA THJ FWIK !!
yukitsunoda: my innocent eyes 😳
user9: soft launch on main🫢
y/n.lelcerc: it is the best city
pierregasly: even better people 😏
user2: what 😳
charlesleclerc: so that why you ditch dinner 😂
pierregasly: haha sorry mate 😅
f1wags
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f1wags: NEW WAG???
Pierre gasly was spotted out in monaco with a mystery woman, right after posting flirty pic in his monaco photo dump. What do you think?
user4: is that y/n?!?
user2: I think it is 🫢
user6: they could just be hanging out
user8: after that one comment tho
y/n.leclerc
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y/n.leclerc: sunshine
tagged: pierregasly
user6: soft launch who?
user5: totally 🫢
carlossainzjr: adorable! hope pierre lives 😅
y/n.leclerc: same 😰
charlesleclerc: answer you phone
y/n.leclerc: no I'm scared 😳
charlesleclerc: I know where you both live 😡
user7: omg charles!!!
yukitsunoda: finally 🙌
pierregasly
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pierregasly: because I only have a couple minutes before charles finds me, just want to show her off 💓 je t'aime bella.
y/n.leclerc: je t'aime aussi 🤍
arthurleclerc: gross 😑
y/n.leclerc: you're just jealous arthur
charlesleclerc: I'll give you a 5 second head start gasly
pascalleclerc: leave them alone charlie, they're cute
y/n.leclerc: thank you mama
pierregasly: love you Pascal 🥰
yukitsunoda: I knew it !!!!
danielricciardo: gasly got game 🫡
charlesleclerc: that's my sister dude 😡
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hanafubukki · 9 months ago
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Hana, scenario just popped in my head.
Just to clarify, put this before Yuu and Lilia got together.
Okay so, Lilia Tsum is getting all of Yuu’s attention, absolutely loving how he’s being called adorable, a precious bean, being hugged and kissed because he’s such an adorable Tsum, cradled and loved by this giant version of their beloved, how more can this stuffed toy ask?
Well, in reality Tsum Lilia is doing it to also annoy normal Lilia, because he thought these two were a thing, what is a little game of jealousy? Tsum Lilia gets to spend quality time with this version of his own lover, he’s sure Lilia is going to snap at him and he’s going to turn this into a hide and seek game; wrong.
Lilia, who wants to confess but fumbles it everytime and doesn’t want to come up as intense to Yuu, he’s on the sideline just watching all of this with a look of (°ㅂ°╬).
Yuu, unaware or just not feeling confident enough to confess to this dilf so they get to hug and kiss this version of their crush because it’s adorable, anyone would understand that cuteness aggression, this is one way to get those loving feeling off their chest.
And they just look at Lilia like “You doing alright? You’ve been awfully quiet” because they think they did something wrong, maybe he got bored of their conversation? Is he late for something? They aren’t, maybe they could offer to go to Sam’s and buy snacks to just, you know, be with him a bit longer.
And Lilia is just “No, nothing, just thinking of a, future training regime for the boys” he’s trying to reach for the Tsum and go prank people because the feeling and laughter at someone’s misfortune is WAY better than this burning jealousy, maybe he could get back to his Tsum with a prank or two.
And it clicks to Tsum Lilia, how coward can this version of himself be? Not on his watch!
So he disappears from Yuu’s arms and makes them trip, Lilia catching them by the waist, Tsum Lilia taking this advantage to tackle Lilia and making both fall on each other.
With both on the ground, maybe in a stupid position who knows, Tsum Lilia jumping on his counterparts head like “fucking do it dude! I know you love them, just confess!”
Okay, that is all I can think of, you go off, how would you end this? With Lilia squeezing the Tsum like a squeaky toy?
Hello Anonie 🌸🌷💕
I find this sweet and funny because not only are we loving and cuddling such a charming little one but it implies the tsum has more charm and bravery than his counterpart 😂😂
Tsum Lilia got together with you but Lilia?? lol he’s behind the game 🤣
And hehehe my~ oh my~ how the tables have turned that your own tsum wants to mess with you~
The way our Lilia is sidelined and just fuming!!! Oh do I love it. Those kisses and cuddles should be his! HIS!
And then you get Tsum Lilia insulting himself and playing wingman. And just, whoops, they tripped! Catch them! And oops! They both fell!
Ooohhh how wonderful would it have been to have them fall and kiss, but of course, Lilia’s reflexes have to kick in now of all times 🥲
Can you imagine being a third party? And watching this cute bean just jumping on Lilia’s head while he’s on top of someone??
I hope Malleus, Sebek, and Silver are watching this and being amused 🤣😆
I think that Tsum Lilia would be ruthless to get Lilia to confess. If he doesn’t do it now? Oh he’s going to make Lilia jealous ten fold and then start wing manning until Lilia has no choice but to confess.
This would be a fun story to tell in the future while Lilia now has an excuse to get his tsum counterpart and squeeze him like a chew toy.
Until you free him from his grip and lovingly hug the tsum, after all it’s why you two are together 💞
Lilia is punting it to the sky when he gets the chance 😂😂jkjkjk
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accio-victuuri · 2 months ago
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XZS Anniversary video CPN. 👾 💛
i know this is late, or later than how fast i usually am when it comes to cpn posts. but it’s hereeee! the video in question is this one. per usual, it’s a good one.
the first thing i noticed is the game theme, which is not the first time xz and his team has used a similar layout. what got me first was the theme itself, cause it reminded me of what yibo said. that real life is like a game. we know these two love to play games together so it makes sense — and seeing the same “interest”, not only with “playing games” which a lot of people do like but comparing it to their life is more unique. i hope they continue to acquire skills and level up together!
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ybo also had a “game” layout before. 👀
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1. also that detail of the road being shaped into 5 to represent 5 years. it’s like how yibo initially did the 6 with skateboards and then p3 and p4 by ybo.
they have the same braincell 🧠
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2. XZS is still following what XZ prefers when it comes to presenting his works. It was mentioned in an LRLG rumor before where he said: "Movies and TV series still need to be distinguished. Last year, they were all waiting to be broadcast."
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and you can see it in the video, dramas and movies were classified accordingly. we love an organized king!
3. The caption is sending me. Tho it makes sense cause the past five years and the next ones to come is gonna be an adventure but…
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journey, unknown world, wonderful adventure, constant exploration and discovery.
dude…..
why don’t you just type exploring the unknown 😂 on a different day i will let it slide but the word choice while the show is on makes this more sus!
4. Comparing it to yibo-official’s birthday art. There is something that looks like a tent and a body of water.
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you can look at it as a house but it is different to how the “houses” are drawn. it also appears to resemble what wyb used in an episode of ETU.
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5. Might be a coincidence but if you count from the start, the WWX image is 8th. and if you start from the end, it’s the 5th. 85.
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and it’s not like he was following some order of what drama or character came out first. no. WWX is placed in the 8th. it’s very telling. 👀
sources: one / two / three / four / five
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chukys-mouthguard · 18 days ago
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what are the odds? | part 6
matt rempe x female reader; featuring numerous side characters
social media au!
part 5
mattrempe
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liked by your.name.here, kandre.miller, addison.clark and 401,201 others
mattrempe nothing says I’m sorry like some wine and a good board game 🎲
alleyrempe thank god you’re not entirely hopeless
-> mattrempe the boys got me together 🤞🏼
liked by kandre.miller and chris.kreider
-> alleyrempe don’t make the girls have to come after you next time
liked by francesca.kreider and addison.clark
user30284 he apologized!! 😭 thank god
-> user50347 i was ready to give up hope if they couldn’t fix things 🥹
addison.clark who knew he was a cook?!
-> mattrempe stepping my game up because she deserves it
liked by addison.clark
-> addison.clark that she does!
your.name.here no more get out of jail free cards for you sir 😜
-> mattrempe don’t plan on needing one 😉
liked by your.name.here
user35038 so they fixed things?!
-> user20490 i feel like it was probably something dumb
-> user80584 dumb or not it clearly was enough to cause issues…
kandre.miller you’re welcome
-> mattrempe i owe you and kreids big time
-> chris.kreider there’s a new Rolex I’ve been eyeing 👀
-> mattrempe dude I’m a fourth liner…how about i get you a nice Fitbit? 😂
your.name.here
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liked by alleyrempe, mattrempe, addison.clark and 354,201 others
your.name.here i guess I’ll keep him 🙄
alleyrempe no take backs this time!
-> your.name.here something tells me i won’t be giving him back
liked by alleyrempe and mattrempe
user20484 shut up this is so cute 🥹
-> user63924 thank god he fixed whatever happened!
-> user10384 i love we assume it was his fault…
-> user63924 literally everyone has confirmed it was him that messed up…😂
addison.clark omg it’s my otp 🫶🏼
-> francesca.kreider i ship them so hard
-> your.name.here i hate you both 😂
liked by francesca.kreider and addison.clark
user20559 I’m waiting on an official post hard launching them…
-> user24943 don’t hold your breath 🙄 lol
mattrempe shit your bf is kinda hot 🥵
this comment was deleted by mattrempe
mattrempe who is that handsome devil?? 👀
-> your.name.here he’s a handsome ranger, get it right 😉
liked by mattrempe
user32055 where is tybauer_ to out them when we need him ? 😂
-> tybauer_ soon enough they’ll out themselves lol
-> user32055 👀
-> user52559 soooo are we getting a hard launch?
-> your.name.here you’re the reason we can’t have nice things tybauer_ 🙄😂
-> tybauer_ 🫶🏼🫶🏼🫶🏼
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wombywoo · 1 year ago
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last post I'll be making about this, but this is the supposed 'proof' someone has that my art is AI💀
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um...number 1--that's just a hand?? that I literally used my own hand as a reference for 🙋‍♀️look it's got all the proper phalanges and everything!
number 2 is apparently suspect because of the 'lettering'. my dude, that's the actual font from the game ⬇️
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yeah. no further questions 😂
I'm confused at what's wrong with #3. He's just british, I'm sorry 🤷‍♀️
The fourth one is NOT EVEN MINE lol. moving on
Again--that's just an arm. Sure, Marston could do with a few ten pound reps every now and then, but I'm not gonna fault him for a perfectly good limb ??
Do I need to say anything else??
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meanbossart · 9 months ago
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so, uh… a while ago, you posted the lineart for this in case someone wants to color it for practice. and i did! it was *such* a pleasure to work with your lines, omg. i hope you won't cringe too hard!
i'm too much of a coward to attempt cel shading or really dark shadows. also not sure i got the right idea with the sand and water and in short i don't know what i'm doing 😭
ANYWAY. got any tips? i would love to know what you'd do differently.
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as an aside: would it be ok to post this on my blog (with proper credit, of course)?
OH YAY SOMEONE GAVE IT A SHOT! Excellent work dude! Really enjoying the wet look you have his skin.
Frankly I was struggling so much with coloring this picture (there were several attempts 😂) that I barely feel qualified to give you any any advice, I think the blame lies in my own anatomy in this drawing - I made it a little too flat somehow, which made rendering really difficult to nail! So you were already working at a disadvantage.
But I would definitely encourage you to employ more shadows to contrast with your color palettes! I know it can be a daunting task (trust me, it still is for me too to this day) but its through experimentation that we figure these things out. Studying how/when to use soft edges or hard edges on your highlights and shadows is also a huge game changer.
Thank you so much for giving my lines a shot!!! And OF COURSE you can post it, it's half your own work after all
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