#but at least they're also not normal about it

[soineffablygay]

it's shakespearean, but it's also giving greek mythology. there's something so raw and fundamentally human about this story it feels like it should be ancient? everything that's in there about the need to prove yourself, striving for a legacy, your ambition killing everything around you? the beauty of an unlikely pair pulling and pushing each other like magnets? polar opposites but ultimately the same? loving each other but ultimately burning each other? not able to be together but also not able to be apart?

think about how both need to prove themselves: nico, because he needs to be good to step out of his father's shadow and lewis, because all the odds are stacked against him and marginalised people always have to work twice as hard to get anywhere.

think about how nico is the golden boy, basically predestined to be a formula one champion, and how lewis is the underdog, coming up on top despite everything because he's just that good. and so lewis starts collecting championships and nico is still chasing him, never quite good enough to beat him. and then he decides to put everything on the line one year and breaks himself and the friendship (or whatever) in the process. the golden boy finally get his championship, taking it from his friend – and then he's gone. he leaves without giving his rival the chance to take that championship away from him. of course that doesn't break the others' strike, he keeps winning, he keeps building his legacy, he keeps fulfilling his vision, but he never gets the chance to beat the other one again.

sometimes i genuinely can’t believe brocedes is real like what do you MEAN they were each other’s best & only friend as children because they were so far ahead of everyone else. what do you mean one of them came from unimaginable wealth and privilege and the other grew up in public housing and faced classism and racism in probably the world’s biggest nepotism sport. and what do you mean they both make it to the top of the sport they’ve spent their entire lives trying to reach, and they fulfill all the dreams they had as children, and they’re doing it together. they reach the peak of their careers together, and both shine so brightly that they burn each other out. like what do you mean as soon as one of them beats the other after three years (and a lifetime) of trying to get the upper hand, he retires instantly from this sport that has been their entire lives because beating the other was all he ever wanted to get out of it? what do you mean one of them can’t even say the other’s name to this day? what do you mean they still live in the same building??? and that’s not even the full extent of their lore. it’s downright shakespearean and it’s worse because they’re REAL

[iamnmbr3]

the gap between sectemsempra scene and astronomy tower scene is so fucking jarring. Like harry sees him crying and is shocked by it then draco literally CONFESSES to everything harry was sure of (he was obsessed with him over that and was dying to know about his mission and to basically catch him at it)...then he slices him open and feels bad. Then NOTHING right to worrying him because he couldn't kill dumbledore? Neither talking to him nor stalking him. But dating ginny (it wasn't that he stopped for ginny he stopped it before ginny)

Absolutely nonsense..

I KNOW! I will never stop being absolutely INSANE about that section of the book. Harry walks in on Draco saying some incredibly incriminating and concerning things. And then Draco attacks Harry and tries to use an extremely dark and extremely illegal spell on him; remember, just using an Unforgivable on someone once is enough to land you in Azkaban for life. And by the way, this is a spell that most people who aren't dark wizards wouldn't even be capable of using properly. Also, Harry was already sure that Draco was a Death Eater and had to endure months of everyone else dismissing him and rolling their eyes at him.

And what is Harry's reaction? Does he feel vindicated and double down on his efforts to figure out what Draco's up to and stop him? Does he spend weeks gloating to his friends that he was right and then insist that they help him stalk Draco too? Does he report to magical law enforcement that Draco, the son of a disgraced Death Eater who is in jail, attempted to use a highly illegal spell on him and also is probably in league with Voldemort, thereby probably getting Draco expelled at the very least and quite possibly jailed (especially given that the Ministry is desperate to find people to round up so they can show the public they're doing something)?

Nope! These would all be expected and normal reactions to what went down. But instead, Harry is consumed with guilt and horror over the fact that he accidentally hurt Draco during a possibly life-threatening duel precipitated by Draco, who Harry is sure is a DEATH EATER, realizing that Harry heard him saying incriminating things. (I mean, really, I think Draco was just upset and also humiliated that Harry saw him in such a vulnerable position and lashed out without thinking, but the most logical assumption would be that he was trying to get rid of a witness - though I don't think that was the case and I think Harry actually knows that due to his deep understanding of Draco).

And furthermore, despite the fact that Draco likely poses a threat to everyone in school, Harry completely backs off. After seeing Draco in such a desperate and vulnerable position, after seeing how frightened and miserable he is, after seeing how investigating him led to him getting hurt, Harry totally backs off.

His only feelings are remorse for what he did. He seemingly does not tell a teacher or any other authority figure that Draco tried to use an illegal curse on him or even that Draco started the fight, even though that would have gotten him out of trouble. He feels so guilty that he seems to uncharacteristically feel that he deserves Snape's detentions over the incident, even though he feels nothing but hatred for Snape and usually perceives any punishment Snape gives him as unfair.

And it is in this context that he pursues a relationship with Ginny. While trying to forget about Draco. That is what he fills the hole in his life with. Just...wow.

And listen. I'd love to wax poetic about how masterfully this is done. How the jarring nature of Harry's switch from being obsessed with Draco to distracting himself completely through a socially acceptable relationship with Ginny is a really sophisticated way to represent his conflicted feelings about Draco and how he's trying to suppress his feelings of attraction for him, to the point of even lying to himself. But I can't. Because while that is what we see in the text, I know JKR did it entirely by mistake and, given the quality of the romances she writes on purpose, wouldn't have been capable of doing it intentionally even if she wanted to.

This is like giving a monkey a keyboard and having it immediately write a sequel to Hamlet that's somehow better than the original. Technically satistically possible, but highly unlikely and thus an absolutely mindblowing and insane development. I will never be over this.

[tokyo-daaaamn-ji-gang]

Could you share some headcannons about South or Mochi, please?

No one ever talks about them unless it's to trash them 😔

Here are my ones for Mochi!

Refuses to fight girls and actively tried to avoid Senju during fights they were both in.

When he's grocery shopping he normally gets asked by people to reach things on the higher shelves, he always gets them what they need.

Has an arm wrestling club with Draken and Pah in the good timeline

Corn is actually a comfort food for him, he ate it a lot growing up

Would love to have a dog (also has a fondness for cats)

He frequently steps into fights that he feels are unfair like a group teaming up on one person (as long as they're not a target for his gang).

When he gets bored he looks for someone to fight

Loves festivals, especially the games at them

As a partner he's incredibly gentle, carefully holding your hand and placing soft kisses on you. He's very aware of his strength and careful with it.

Similarly to Pah and Mikey, Izana once fell asleep on Mochi

Doesn't like that he isn't a fast runner (mainly because Shion and the Haitani brother's sometimes tease him over it)

He didn't like his life in bonten much, it wasn't what he thought it would be like

In the good timeline, after he joined toman and realised Angry was scared of him, he tried to be friendlier towards him (usually by bringing him a drink to meetings)

He's very good with the kids in the future timeline, they love climbing all over him and how happy he is to play with them.

Very good at ball sports 

Growing up, his father was a police officer who often wasn't home and worked overtime. His mother was always kind to him and they were very close but she died when he was a kid, he ran away after that. 

One time he managed to catch a balloon a kid accidentally let go off before it got too high, he felt like a hero that day.

And here are my ones for South!

He's dressed up at least once as the phantom of the opera for Halloween. 

South can't swim and is actually kind of scared of deep bodies of water

He generally thought Takemichi was very strong because of the way Kakucho spoke about him and his reputation. Was very disappointed to find out everyone was talking about a different kind of strong.

Enjoys hugs a lot

Kept accidentally mixing up the Haitani brother's names when he first met them. 

One of his favourite things to do with his partner is to pick them up. Likes the feeling of being responsible for them, he especially likes it when they cling to him. 

He used to line up all his plushies to watch him play piano 

He's super soft towards his grandparents, he may be mean to others but will always help them out around the house and stuff if they need it.

All his plushies have names 

His grandparents call him Minami 

He frequently travels back to Brazil to visit the graves of his mother and Dino.

Doesn't understand the concept of a water fight, will start punching 

Anytime someone suggests an activity he will suggest karaoke 

Isn't used to hugs, doesn't know what to do with them 

Is surprisingly patient when it comes to teaching the piano

Gets along well with Senju in the good timeline, they match each other's energies well.

Does not have an inside voice

Has never used a helmet while riding his bike before

Very strong handshakes

Doesn't have a favourite song, he has a few favourites instead that he can't choose between 

Will purposely pick fights with random strangers just because he enjoys it. Will find any excuse to do this

As a partner he's very excitable, loves to hold his partners hand and just go walking about with them, showing them his favourite places and seeing theirs.

Really likes fireworks

Although he can insult people in multiple languages, he prefers to use a language the person will understand. Wants people to know when he's threatening them

Once stole Mikey's taiyaki to try and make him fight, it was the best fight he's ever had (Draken told him to never do it again)

Has a very high tolerance to alcohol, it's hard to get him drunk

[sleepymccoy]

So I've seen a few seasons of supernatural in my life. Got to season 5 then trialled off and have seen a fair bit of the rest but not consistently and def not to the end. Haven't watched any in years and years, too

Anyway, I say this to highlight how bizarre it is that I had a lovely destiel dream last night

It'd make a killer fic I think, so enjoy this synopsis

Premise very much like that ep where Dean forgets his life and works in an office dressed like a lil fruit

^ that ep

Anyway the idea is that Dean forgets his life but is otherwise the same. But without the hunting stuff he's semi deadbeat working in a bar and hooking up with random women. Also Sam wasn't part of his childhood I guess, the dream didn't explain why Dean wouldn't know Sam but whatever

Castiel and Sam keep coming into the world to try and get Dean to perform a series of actions he needs to perform in order to be released from the spell. They're kinda bizarre tho and Dean doesn't recognise these guys so it's a challenge. Like, eat this daisy and have a tequila chaser. Sleep in a bed with bay leaves stuffed underneath. Stand in one spot for a minute while the sigil to release you gets engaged. That kind of thing

Dean has like feelings for them, but doesn't know them. He trusts Sam completely and they click but he's kind of weirded out by how comfortable he is with the stranger. And Cas, he wants to protect and fuck Cas in a way that's so overwhelming he can't handle it

Anyway, this is a longish post so click through for the blow by blow

Sam manages to talk him into having the flower and drink by doing it himself and pretending it's a fun way to drink. Dean takes part and is totally unimpressed but has a laugh about it

Cas slips in next with the intention of watching Dean hook up with someone and sneaking bay leaves under the bed before they get down and dirty. Because Cas can fly out the window if he needs to escape quick they figure he's the better choice for that gig. But as soon as Dean sees him it goes sideways because Dean has an immediately unavoidable crush on the raggedy middle aged dude in a Columbo coat

But this Dean didn't have the same loyalty to his father in youth cos there was no hunting to help make sense of the abuse he suffered. So he's not as caught up in his internalised (and externalised) homophobia and maybe even hooked up with a guy or two at school

It's still not normal for him and he's a bit surprised, but it takes him one beer and some disconcerting staring to get over it, and then he approaches

Cas is Unprepared™ for a full flirt from Dean and is very quickly taken in by it. It's fun and cheerful and Dean keeps swapping their drinks and stealing chips and leaning his hand on Cas' thigh when he whispers a joke to him. Cas is just dizzy and swimming in it and doesn't know what to do. He's totally lost track of what's going on

Eventually he excuses himself to go to the bathroom and checks in with Sam, who's had an hour of watching them flirt outrageously and is thoroughly bemused, amused, and has his eyes on the goal. "Get him into bed and put the damned leaves in place!"

So Cas goes back and Dean's paid the tab and is offering to drive and Cas just like you're drunk absolutely not. They make out against the door of Dean's beat up Ford Focus and Cas knows he's not gonna come back from this

He's loved Dead a long time, and there's something painful in the kiss and feeling the immorality of it. But there's something so wonderful too. And if it's got to happen, and Sam says it's got to happen so he can outsource that decision, he can take it as far as it needs to go. Save Dean, then apologise and skedaddle

At least he's got Sam's permission, so Sam can argue his side in his absence until Dean forgives him

It doesn't take long for Dean to kiss Cas into forgetting to feel guilty, tho. Then Dean starts talking about how Cas feels different to anyone else he's ever touched before and he doesn't understand why but he wants him so damned bad.

The Dean pulls back and offers to go slow. Pick you up for breakfast, go on a few dates before what's next

And Cas wants that so bad, he wants to be special, his skin aches for it. But he needs access to Dean's bed so he spearheads getting them into a motel together for the night, feeling slightly cheap and awful about it, but Dean's smile is unparalleled and the awful slides away every time he looks at him

They fuck a bit. Cas' guilt about it all isn't his focus, as soon as Dean's hand is on his dick he's only in the moment. I think Cas keeps it to mutual blow jobs, tho, he wants to save anything more for a Dean who knows him. He lies there's thinking about that afterwards and remembers that the Dean who knows him doesn't want him like this, this is some confused fucked up neuron thing.

Anyway after a bit of post coital bliss Dean gets up to piss and Cas shoves bay leaves under the mattress. Cas then insists on laying together a bit longer, they make out sloppy and Dean is very sweet and Cas loves him and eventually Dean dozes off. Tick off the second ritual

I reckon the last one ends up easy enough. While Dean sleeps Cas holds him and hums while Sam awkwardly and without looking directly at them carves the sigil in the floor. When Dean wakes up Cas makes a big deal about how pretty he is in the light and stay right there so I can take a photo of you

So Dean's striking a stupid sexy pose when the spell fades. And he realises everything that's happened and the significance of it all

Also Sam's in the room now and that's just a bit fucking awkward

Cas just leaves, cos he doesn't know what else to do. He texts Dean an apology. Dean doesn't respond for like three days which is just hellish but eventually he texts back saying come over and talk.

So Cas does. Dean's sorry too, Sam has talked him into recognising that he really got the ball rolling and Cas was a bit cornered. And Cas, desperate to not have Dean feel guilty, talks about his feelings in this vague and uncertain way. But ultimately says he glad he had a chance, even in a false world. Nice to have the memories

And Dean's just like. Okay. So you didn't hate it? And I didn't hate it. And now that there's no crazy spell to work through, do you want to take it slow?

What? Cas says

Breakfast date?

Cas is useless at taking it slow. He goes on this breakfast date and does his ridiculous I love humanity because I loved you first speech and Dean's like fuck man this is intense to hear over eggs and shit coffee! But yeah I'm sitting on some feeling that've kicked passed loyalty into devotion and I also kinda want to suck your dick again so shut up and let me come to terms with being gay a bit slower, fucking hell. You're beautiful, give me a kiss

They figure it out

[destiny2-names]

A post for fellow "healer main" warlocks

I'm not sure if it's intentional, and maybe this was already a thing and I just didn't notice it, but there are now some activities where healing rifts don't heal. Defeating the whole point of healing rifts. Which can be quite off-putting for warlocks whose builds prioritize that.

So! What can we do instead?

Healing grenades, especially when combined with the Seeker's Sight exotic helmet, are quite useful in a pinch. They even have the added bonus that, unlike rifts, you can throw them at allies you can't reach quickly. However, healing grenades can only be used by Solar and Prismatic subclasses.

A lot of warlocks, me included, have probably spent a good amount of time trying to get their Recovery stat as high as possible. That's the stat that contributes to how fast your rift recharges, and normally a higher Recovery makes your health regenerate faster; for activities where natural health regeneration is disabled, you might want to focus more on Resilience.

Don't COMPLETELY dump Recovery though, because non-healing rifts are still useful! Empowering rifts buff your weapons, and phoenix dive (another ability option unique to Solar and Prismatic) gives your allies a brief burst of healing.

Things like solar mortars and arc souls still work regardless of what you've got equipped in your rift ability slot, but they won't stick around for as long with phoenix dive.

Remember: you can't help anyone if you're dead. Sometimes, if you can't reach your downed teammates safely, the best way to avoid a wipe is to take cover until at least one other person respawns.

Certain weapons, such as those with a support frame or the Healing Clip trait, can give a little boost to the amount of healing you can do for both others and yourself. Hey, anything counts.

For keeping yourself alive, Karnstein's Armlets can be handy (pun intended) when you're being swarmed by weaker enemies. They're a great combo with Monte Carlo, but even unpowered melee kills should activate the gauntlets' effect.

Don't forget about armor mods! Two leg armor mods, Recuperation and Better Already, give you small bursts of healing when you pick up orbs of power. If one or both aren't already part of your kit, you might want to take a look at them, because that healing really adds up when combined with helmet Siphon mods.

If you're using healing grenades, there are also several armor mods that will help that ability recharge faster, such as Bomber, Ennervation, and Explosive Finisher.

This post is meant to help save fellow players– especially newbies and people who only have time to play casually– some time and frustration. If you have any advice to add, please do! If you have questions, please ask! If I got something wrong, please tell me so I can correct it! And if this all seems super obvious to you or you have a better way of doing things, feel free to comment, but please don't be a jackass about it. Thank you.

[ghelullu]

You dont think emertius is a name? I always see them referred to as emeritus brothers

Hi anon,

obviously I don't know what TF thought and planned - there are a ton of lore inconsistencies and deviations from how real world things would work, after all (because Ghost stuff isn't that deep and we, including TF, are here to have fun) - but in *my* opinion it is not a family name, but a title. At the very least it was intended as a title originally:

Emeritus as a real world addition to the title (papa or professor etc.) simply means they've retired from their position and are still there but, like, chilling. My fave Prof at uni did it and he'd still be around and help students and do research, but he didn't hold the chair anymore. Also see what Josef Ratzinger/ Pope Benedict XVI did when he said 'bye suckers'

Benedict was also a hilarious case of messing up TFs idea shortly after starting Ghost: Papa I, originally, was supposed to be undead, that's the whole joke here: because until Benedict XVI retired in 2013, usually (bc the last pope retirement happened in 1415) papacy meant sitting on that damn chair in the Vatican until you die. So a "retired" Papa meant he had died. This alone is - to me - a perfectly fine reason to assume that TF meant "Papa Emeritus" as a whole title and not just "Papa" with Emeritus as family name

if you go from Catholicism then the Family Name of the person becoming Papa/Pope doesn't get included in the papal name, but rather you take on a whole new name (Josef Ratzinger becoming Pope Benedict XVI and not Pope Ratzinger)

Of course it IS a bit weird that they're Papa Emeritus (0) I-IV when the line of papacy has started with Nihil's father's father(many fathers here)...but that's just one of the goofy inconsistencies in the Ghost lore I guess.

IMHO this started out of a) confusion over latin words and knowledge about general catholic church working and b) the desire to know these dudes names. Until long into Papa IIIs reign it was normal to call them papa i, ii, iii, only into the later Papa III era and especially with Copia fronting the band the trend of calling them Primo, Secondo and Terzo came up and only in the late Cardi/Popia era the Emeritus last name thing really took off (afair).

(Sidenote: I won't get into the first name debate here, bc honestly it doesn't matter; but I WILL say that numbers can be valid names, especially when your father kinda doesn't care, but also see: Prima, Secunda, Quintus, Sextus, Septimus, Octavian, ... just to give a few Roman names. and Papa 0 is reffered to as "nihil", so I don't think it's too far off to call the others by their italian succession number names))

Use Emeritus as a last name if you want, obviously! This is a playground and you can HC whatever the hell you want. In *my personal opinion* based on the catholic church, TF's sense of humour and general latin words, the title is "Papa Emeritus" and Emeritus is not a last name.

[toomanyfish2]

les mis fic recs (enjoltaire)

as a musical theatre nerd and nerd in general, behold my exr recs.

The Icarus Experiment - Chapter 1 - stvrkey - Les Misérables - All Media Types [Archive of Our Own]

Grantaire's family is the largest collection of idiots he's ever seen exist in one place without succumbing to death by natural selection. They're ridiculous, chaotic, sad, furious, utterly codependent, and, er, they have wings. They're also imprisoned in a secret government facility that experiments on them for unknown (but Grantaire's gonna go ahead and say sinister) reasons. The revolution will not be civilised.

Chapters: 6/6 | Words: 192,710 | AU - Maximum Ride

2. too afraid to love you - Chapter 1 - kkingofthebeach - Les Misérables - All Media Types [Archive of Our Own]

this is probably one of my two favourites - as a recovering addict myself it definitely tugged on the ol' heartstrings. accurate depiction of addiction.

Enjolras is a university dropout and Grantaire is an addict. Between them they like to think they’ve got enough misfit friends to make a difference in the world - or London at the very least - if hedonism doesn’t get the better of them.

Chapters: 31/34 | Words: 215,113

3. Under My Wings You Will Find Refuge - Chapter 1 - Fiver - Les Misérables - All Media Types [Archive of Our Own]

"Let me come with you. It's not smart to go around fighting monsters on your own." "Almost all hunters work alone." "Doesn't make it any smarter." In which Enjolras is going to save the innocent masses from the things that go bump in the night, and Grantaire is definitely either a lot more or a lot less than he appears. Neither of them can quite decide which it is.

Chapters: 24/? | Words: 225,809 | AU - Supernatural

4. Evergreen - Chapter 1 - lyres - Les Misérables - All Media Types [Archive of Our Own]

(Slightly coming-of-age-y college AU that will likely involve R walking into the wrong class in his first week, les Amis as editors of the student paper, an eventual nightly arrest, and a trip to Paris)

Chapters: 14/14 | Words: 160,415

5. these things take time - Chapter 1 - sonhoedesrazao - Les Misérables - All Media Types [Archive of Our Own]

the other of my two favourites :)

He’s always wary of making assumptions; even more so when Grantaire is concerned. He knows he’s not the easiest person to deal with. People either like him or can’t stand him, and it’s easy to respond to those reactions, but Grantaire—Grantaire is hostile and mocking, Grantaire scorns his beliefs, and Grantaire stays.

Chapters: 10/10 | Words: 63,170

6. World Ain't Ready - Chapter 1 - idiopathicsmile - Les Misérables - All Media Types [Archive of Our Own]

(High school AU. Grantaire the disaffected stoner is pulled into a cause bigger than himself. Or: in which there are pretend boyfriends for great justice.)

Chapters: 16/16 | Words: 185,795 | AU - Highschool

7. Lovesickness - idiopathicsmile - Les Misérables - All Media Types [Archive of Our Own]

Enjolras swallowed. "I didn't know he had tattoos on his back." "Yeah," said Joly, shrugging. "I mean, he lives with me and before about noon, he's allergic to shirts—" "Why—" said Enjolras weakly. "I always figured he had a bad shirt experience," Joly offered. "Shirts killed his family, or his first dog got hit by a truck full of shirts." Enjolras shook his head. His face was a little flushed. "Ooh, are you experiencing symptoms?" said Joly, brightening. "What's your pulse doing? Are you breathing normally? How do your glands feel?"

Chapters: 1/1 | Words: 11,017

[prettycottonmouthlamia]

Oh boy there is so much here and I'd absolutely love a crack at explaining it. "What is weird about cats in Arknights?" a lot actually, and honestly, it's what is weird about every animal in Arknights.

So, yes, first of all, you have the "Feline" race, which broadly includes every cat person in the game, with the exception of lion people, who are categorized under Aslan instead. These aren't actually super important to our discussion immediately, so I'm going to gloss over them for right now. Point is, lots of people are cat people in this world, and this isn't given much pause.

That, at minimum, though, is a little weird. People on Terra don't seem to know that "cats" exist for the most part. There are a few people in particular that are important to our discussions here: first is Mousse, who has a bunch of friends she calls "kitties" but whom don't seem to be creatures known to the wide world; second is Haze, who has a major interest in "kitties", but these being BOTH the normal cat looking varieties AND Felines; and Phantom, who is a feline that is followed around by a two-tailed cat named Ms. Christine.

Ms. Christine gives us our first clue into all of this. Haze has a lot of respect for her, and Ms. Christine seems to just randomly appear in places following Phantom. What's more, the implication is that Ms. Christine won't show herself without her consent. If she doesn't want you to find her, you won't. While this might just seem like your average cat behavior, this is actually a common trait about the various Beast Lords in the game. Dolly, the Beast Lord for Sheep, can also make it so he is not visible to people if he so wishes, with one exception (Kal'tsit).

Ms. Christine hasn't talked at all, so we don't specifically need to know what her deal is. We do know that she is trying to keep Phantom away from the Crimson Troupe, the wandering assassination theater group who raised and groomed him from when he was a young orphan, and given that she can freely walk amongst the troop's castle in Calais, it's at least clear she's not ordinary.

What about Mousse's kitties? We don't know! They do seem to have some degree of deliberate intelligence to them, but they might simply be normal cats. The point here is that the others don't know what they are, so it's possible they could be Beast Lords too.

What IS interesting is that, according to Dolly, Beast Lords and their modern races originate from the same source. Beast Lords are _probably_ manifestations of animals that resulted after the first Catastrophes brought Originium to the surface worldwide, and from that point, the Beast Lords were born and the other animals began their evolutionary divergence (because remember: this is not a people becoming animals story, it's an animals becoming people story!).

There are also cloudbeasts, or at least at minimum, cloudbeasts are similar enough in shape to cat and dogs that the people of Terra don't find Mio or Woof to be particularly strange (Mio and Woof being Beast Lords themselves). Terra does seem to have its own unique versions of many animals we would know: fowlbeasts for birds, burdenbeasts for large herbivores etc. But on Terra, by and large (depending on what is happening with Mousse), it lacks the animals that we would expect in our world, as they either became Beast Lords or turned into animal people.

(For example, there is a Hound type enemy in the game, but they're actually some kind of fragment of a dog-like Beast Lord in Bolivar. This is only explained in the CN only lorebook because Hypergryph hates me in particular.)

This covers almost everything there is to say about cats in Arknights, with one exception: Kal'tsit. The like immortal green cat girl of the setting. Her conversation with Nezzsalem, the almost as immortal leader of the Nachzehrer, indicates that she seemingly was not always a cat girl, and we know that she is actually an artificial creation from the Precursor Civilization to Terra that brought both the original animals and Originium to the moon. So what is Kal'tsit, if she were not always a cat girl?

We don't know! My theory is that Mont3r, her companion, is in some way a "larval" form of Kal'tsit, given that it is sentient and that Kal'tsit seems to trust it to do the right thing when she passes. Curious!

Anyways yeah. Cats are weird in Arknights.

Arknights could pull off an event about a young witch searching for her lost cat in the alps. In fact it’d actually be super hype considering how weird cats are in lore

[nobodysavemysoulitsperfectlyfine]

The seven as perfumes/colognes/vaguely smelling substances except I don't know anything about formulas

Note that these are probably not real things you can put in a perfume this is for fun.

Also I got a lot of this from Reddit.

Percy: Top notes would be some sort of sweet like vanilla bean, Middle notes would include seaspray and tropical fruits, and base notes would probably be a nice honey, cocoa or brown sugar sorta thing. According to my research (scrolling through Pinterest) these are typically scents you find in women's perfume.

And to assume that Percy Jackson gives a fuck about what he smells like as long as it's good. Tsk tsk. Percy probably smells like what you imagine a tropical get a way is, which sucks because he can never get that.

Annabeth: Top notes for Annabeth would definitely be of the citrus sort. Specifically lemon. It's said that her perfume was definitely lemon scented, probably because it repels spiders. The girl drowns herself in it. Also because mm yummy. Middle notes would be whatever book smell is like. Call it leather, call it sandalwood, but gawdamn. Essentially she smells liked a freshly cleaned library filled with pastries.

Lesbians flock to her whenever nearby (I'm talking about the one friend she has that hates Percy for some reason)

Leo: Say what you want, the guys a mix of the NASTIEST smells and absurdly sweet chocolate. I've been in enough car shops, mechanic wearhouses and what not to be able to know that there is NO GOD FEARING SCENTS. There's notes of Grease Oils, Sulfur, and the Giant Fennel, which is a plant said to be sweet, aromantic and spicy. Leo smells different every single day that he's working, and failing to rizz the huzz. (Did I say that right?)

Also, he really likes it if someone close to him smells like a food. ESPECIALLY when he's been working for so long and needs to eat something.

Anyways.

Jason: He probably doesn't care much for Cologne, given that most of the ones he finds are supposed to smell like animalistic and musk, when he prefers the real kind. But let's say that for the sake of fitting into Camp Jupiter or what ever, he's wearing the normal stuff. I want to say linen for some reason. But no. There's notes of Petrichor for right after he used his powers (basically the smell of thunder), Metallic and soft earth smells. Jason smells like air right before a storm hits, where the air is misty, the winds slowly picking up, but nothings gone South. Not yet.

Wear an aphrodisiac around him and this man will FREEZE. Like, legitimately. Jason's the type of guy to be so afraid of making one of his friend's uncomfortable that his first instinct will be to do as little as possible so he won't get carried away. People start to notice that he isn't dishing out hugs or friendly touches often.

Frank: The cleanliest musky smell you can find. I can't describe it. Animal smells, but it doesn't get out of hand. I feel like a part of him gets nervous about everybody thinking he stinks, when it's anything but. They're intrigued, but not grossed out, per se. I think it would be hilarious if Frank's the type of person that everybody surrounds, trying to figure out what he's wearing. Sandalwood, Animals, musk, all wrapped up in a nice, evenly balanced package.

Also tell me he doesn't have a weird thing for Jasmine. I can feel it in my delusional bones.

Hazel: She might be the only person who likes the fancy French stuff and purposely wears it. Incense, bereavement flowers, Jasime because she knows Frank likes it :) Mildew, Chrysanthemums, girly takes care of herself. Hazel smells like a funeral home, except it's filled with loving family members, fresh flowers, sweet foods and precious memories.

Piper: I'm conflicted on whether or not she actually wears this stuff. Nevertheless, there's a lingering scent of every single perfume or cologne her siblings wear. And even if she's been through literal tartarus, there's still a trace of bath and body works on her, or at least some pleasant smell. I can't remember if this happened during the lost trio, but I imagine that while in the most random of places, Jason would comment on it, she would deny it, and Leo would confirm it by straight up sniffing her.

No, you know what? She gets a kick out of solely using novelty products. Think Angry Birds scented shit, Hello Kitty and Garfield, Random candy smells that have no right to exist. Jason is baffled every time.

This took a stupid long time to make just for it to not be accurate of any sort. I apologize. Maybe I'll even do more later.

[da-janela-lateral]

Mezato is a very intriguing person despite her position as a side character restricting the audience's knowledge on her, but there are some implications I have become very interested on.

During her conversation with Ritsu post-LOL Cult arc, she mentions something akin to "people really aren't born as equals", referring to how Mob is so disadvantaged compared to Ritsu even thought they're siblings. However, that also says a lot about her motivations. Mezato has two main reasons for organizing the Psycho Helmet Cult and trying to make it influent (with Mob's help as their messiah): 1) it sounded fun; and 2) she wanted to take part in such a massive event. Although the "fun" part can be attributed to the fact that well, she is a fourteen year old with a weird perspective, both motivations are directly associated to not only Mezato's passion, but her opinion on herself.

First of all, she becomes fixated on anything that appears worthy of her attention. It kickstarts her adventures as the school journalist, hunting for any kind of news that she believes to be interesting, and by that she doesn't mean "math class is cancelled": Mezato goes far beyond, from catching shoplifters red-handed to infiltrating a cult that supposedly brainwashes its members. It's clear that the mundane is not enough to her. Mezato wants the current biggest thing. This is one of the reasons she gets so interested in Mob, and being so obsessed with the worldchanging, Mezato cannot bring herself to care as much about the common, the mundane. This way, she can only see entertainment, or better put, value, in what stands out.

Equally, Mezato wants to participate in something she sees as 'big'. Being someone who is so attracted to the flashiest parts of reality, she wants to have an active, direct role regarding them. It makes her feel entertained. It makes her feel fulfilled. It makes her feel special, most of all, because even being in the Biggest Thing's shadow removes her from the condition of banality she disdains so much. That's what makes the Psycho Helmet Cult sound like such an excelent idea, as hollow and uncritical it could be.

But what does these beliefs say about Mezato? Simple. Mezato doesn't think she can be interesting or valuable by herself. She is not shown as pretty, or academically gifted, or athletic. She doesn't appear to have friends. She doesn't even have an ability with the occult like Mob does. Mezato is a normal, lonely girl who has no other excuse to be noticed besides her imprudent detective work, but worse than that, she thinks she can't change. Mezato will never be attention-worthy as herself, so she appeals to inserting herself in whatever interesting thing she finds in the hope that it'll make her Someone by association. She could be a loser, a nobody, but at least she helped build something that is wonderful, and that is the closest she can get to being important.

Her interests and achievements, in this sense, are more like an extension of herself than a result of her passion. A passion that isn't understood by anyone else. A passion that others ignore and are annoyed at, which only reinforces her loneliness and her obsession with chasing after Big Things. If she succeeds, she will finally have a part of herself she can be proud of. After all, there are a hundred wonders in the world with the potential to change everything; there is only one Ichi Mezato and she can never be like them.

[these-detestable-hands]

It's been a bit since I've interacted with octopath so my stuff on these ships may be a little rusty but I'll argue for them anyway.

Castitio (Castti x Partitio)

Before the game even came out, I thought they'd be a silly couple. Lady who doesn't remember and guy bursting at the seems with kindness. I think they're got a neat dynamic, with Castti teasing him a bit but they get along and are friends. Some post canon hcs I have are that Partitio would help Castti set up an organization that produces medicine and teaches about it cause he loves her and he's got the funding anyway. Also I do think being exposed to the poison rain twice did stuff to Castti so I like to hc she's disabled post canon, being a wheelchair user due to muscle weakness, having very little lung capacity and CPTSD. Also not a disability but she has eczema-like purple splotches on her body. Sorry I needed an excuse to quickly mention my disabled Castti headcanons. While they're engaged, Partitio and Floyd work on completely renovating a house to accommodate all of Castti's needs, so like low counters she can reach while on her wheelchair, only one floor, wide doorways, blackout curtains so she can sleep during the day, etc. Castti keeps insisting that she doesn't need that much help and that she's navigating normal houses just fine but then she'd see all the accommodations in their new house and bawl for hours. She'd work less and take it easy post canon. Listen I just think they'd be a really cute couple. Castti patches up your broken arm then her husband comes in and starts cracking jokes and talking about affordable public transportation. I feel like I'm also forgetting a lot of stuff but oh well. I've got a few fics for them posted on ao3, account name: BigOrangeOnion

Ophikari (Ophilia x Hikari) (I also call them The Radiance (hollow knight reference and it makes sense for an au))

OKAY SO this ship started out as an au when the ot1 travelers were added to ot2 for that update last year. Basically, post canon, Hikari visits the arena whenever he's in Montwise. This time, he goes and there's some omega powerful warriors fighting ruthlessly and with no concern for themselves. He realizes it's because they've got some kinda of curse, similar to him with the shadow (I THINK that's what it was called).

So Hikari starts working on figuring out how to free them because their current existence seems miserable. The first he manages to free is Ophilia, by using light magic near her. The light magic makes her briefly remember who she was but it's enough for her to snap out of the mind control that she's been put under. She talks to Hikari and explains that her and her friends were mind controlled by a very weak but not quite dead Galdera, in attempts to conquer and gain more power so he could heal himself faster. So the two of them start working on freeing the other travelers together.

Along the way, they ofc fall in love. I don't remember an awful lot about them unfortunately but I implore anyone reading this to write stuff for them :]

Here's a little drawing I did of them together. I'd include Castitio drawings if I had any but I am not big on drawing ship art unfortunately.

H'aanit x Cyrus x Castti (in a QPR!!! :3)

So this is probably the one I've explored the least purely because I never really shared it with anyone. I keep it to myself because of the amount of hyper specific and sad headcanons. But basically it was an au where I'd just mix and match travelers n stuff. Like just putting different travelers in different continents with weird team compositions cause I'm a big fan of aus and crossovers.

One of the ones I liked the most is where Castti leaves Solistia by herself to explore post canon because she's not very close with the other travelers and self isolates a little. This au starts out kinda sad cause of the focus on my hcs for various characters' mental illnesses. H'aanit is initially traveling alone but Castti joins her and they're a relatively quiet but very effective and productive duo. Later, Cyrus, Olberic, Primrose and Ophilia join. They all have their problems to work through and get through them together.

Castti has to deal with self worth and realizing that she's more than just the team healer.

H'aanit has always had anxiety around losing Z'aanta, which is really bad throughout the entire story so Castti often ends up calming her down during panic attacks and they get really close because of the mutual trust there.

Idk exactly how to describe Cyrus' problems but he's really jumpy and nervous and a little bit angry all the time because of being accused of, y' know, sleeping with a student. Yeah no I never understood why Cyrus wasn't that angry about it, even when I first played the game at age 10.

I think Cyrus is just dealing with the new found rage he constantly has. He had anger management issues as a kid but worked through them and they're just now coming back cause he's been thrown out of his home and people he used to be friends with think the worst of him and he's got no one but this new friend group he hardly knows. You get it.

The story is the three of them (and Olberic, Ophilia and Prim, but this post is about ships so I'll talk about them another time) as they deal with their mental health issues. Through helping each other with these very personal problems, they become very close and eventually decide to be in a qpr together. I think they'd just live relatively quiet lives in S'warkii cause Cyrus is too upset to return to Atlasdam and Castti isn't too keen on going back to Solistia after falling head over heels in love with two people in Osterra.

I don't remember way too much for this au unfortunately. I think they should all cuddle and finally get a good night's sleep for once cause no way a single one of those bitches sleeps well with the crap they see and have experienced.

Sorry I wrote so much. Here is a little drawing based on an Olberic chapter 2 travel banter and the most important H'aanit fact.

I miss octopath yapping with people so uh yknow what! We’re gonna play a game!!

Explain in the notes what y’all’s favorite ships are and why you like them!!!

Only rules are

1) do not explain why everyone should think your ship is canon, as that is not the point of this post 2) do not put any other ships down bc that is also not the point of this post 3) ALL games are included (yes including cotc) 4) ANY SHIPS ARE ALLOWED!!! GO NUTS!!!!

[blondeaxolotl]

Not to come onto your blog and start wildly pointing at a conspiracy board with your art on it but if Vil has always kind of glowed then they probably would have never properly seen the dark

Except potentially while overblotting, experiencing full darkness for the first time ever coupled with everything else that's going on sounds like An Experience and I'm thinking about it hard, thinking about it firm and unpliable even

Oh feel free to hit me with conspiracies about my art/au anytime! Gives me the chance to talk about stuff I haven't thought of before or things I haven't gotten the chance to talk about yet hehe

Continuing on, you are right about the fact Vil has never properly seen the dark. They are aware of it, but they've never been actually LEFT in complete darkness, because their glow/halo has always been a light source that helps them see and even lights up a whole room after they walk in. Even while sleeping, if you were to enter Vil's room while they are asleep, you'd be able to see everything because of the dim light coming from them. So yeah Vil has NEVER seen the dark.

Now the overblotting, I've written in my notes that Vil's glow/halo even goes out when they overblotted (which btw doesn't harm them, they just can't see properly anymore). So their glow/halo going out, combined with everything else, I'd say that's a perfect mix of ingredients to go into a mini panic attack, believing you've gone blind because all your friends and everything around you are now suddenly harder to see. So Overblot Vil is not only filled with rage and envy, but also fear.

Though after the overblot things definitely went back to normal after Vil realised oh okay I've not gone blind, thank sevens. But it wouldn't surprise me if Vil ended up developing some kind of phobia of the dark after that, since their first introduction to it was VERY negative, I'd imagine if for whatever reason their glow/halo went out again, panic would immediately kick in thinking they're overblotting again or something else bad is going to happen. I also highly doubt Vil even told anyone about this, since a high mighty angel being scared of something simple like the dark might be a bit embarrassing (at least in Vil's eyes), Rook probably caught on though but won't say anything about it for Vil's sake.

But yeah, Vil went from never experiencing the dark before to experiencing it the worse way possible that it probably developed into an irrational fear

[not-poignant]

Hi, Pia! A year ago I discovered you through the Mysterious Skin fanfic, which truthfully has helped me in so many emotional layers till this day (and always will). After that read, I jumped on your profile and was blown away by the world you have created with your own hands. You really inspired me to publish my first fic in AO3 recently (for a random fandom), but sadly I've been having a hard time with it.

At the beginning I was relieved that fear didn't stop me anymore, but then it happened again, it came back, in another form, hitting me harder. I don't know how to explain myself, it's just that I think I'm not good enough, that there are better stories with better characterisations and when I read one of those I think: "This is perfect, I could never achieve this level, I don't have this voice, I should just delete mine, I don't have nothing to say, I can't make people feel this way" and I hate to have those feelings because I think it breaks down the true meaning of writing in general (to help people, to connect, to make a tribute, to have an emotional journey), but at this point I have lost my mind. My dream was always to be a writer, but I left it behind for so many reasons, now I thought things were changing inside me, but I guess it's not the case, I can't even deal with a fanfic...

I just wonder if you have ever feel this way before. How did you start writing? How has it been for you? How do you deal with these things? Feel free to answer me only if you're comfortable with that, I don't wanna put pressure on you as if you were my spiritual guide, but, for all the thoughts and things you share here, I think you are a wise person.

Sorry for the long text, I don't have people in real life to talk to about these issues. I'm really grateful to you already because of your story, it's always in my heart, it's part of me. Btw, I hope you are doing well, keep the amazing work. ❤️

PS: Sorry for the mistakes, not a native English speaker here.

Hi anon,

Congrats on posting your first fic! That's really huge. Even if it does open us up to The Insecurities, it's still a massive thing to do in the first place and I'm so happy for you.

As to everything else, oomf, let's get into it.

So the first thing is there is no writer out there who doesn't get assailed - literally assailed - by insecurities and massive feelings of self-doubt or even self-hatred over their writing (if there is, I haven't met them).

There's no point in writing at which they stop, and if you overcome some, new ones come in their place. I think that's just the nature of the beast - both wanting to (ideally) please at least some of our readers, and also offer something decent to read.

It can help to realise this is a normal part of writing and the experience. Obviously at its most severe, it might require therapy support, or professional support of some kind, but getting assailed by The Insecurities is part of being a creative person.

I don't know how to explain myself, it's just that I think I'm not good enough, that there are better stories with better characterisations

So yeah, this is true. Hear me out! This is true for me too. This is true for every writer that exists. Even the ones who win Pulitzers. This is going to sound blunt, but this is true for every story in the world. I know when I post my works that there are better stories with better characterisations out there. And there are stories that I consider perfect to me. But this last part is really important! I don't get to determine what's perfect for everyone. I'm not allowed to make that choice for them. And also people don't read in order to find The Most Perfect Story Ever, they read for many many many reasons, and that one often isn't even on the list! That's just on our list, when we feel beset by The Insecurities.

Like, yes, better stories exist. That's very subjective. They're better to you, they might not be better to some of the readers who read your work, and unless your only goal in writing is to be 'the best ever' (this is not a great goal imho because it's unattainable) sometimes a simple 'oh...yeah I mean it's true there are better stories according to me, but that doesn't mean that people won't enjoy mine, or that people won't think my stories aren't the best, and I'm not even writing to be the best in the world, so I don't know why I'm listening to this because it's not even what my values are in writing.'

But I also need to make it clear that your insecurities will never leave you 100%. They find new ways to come back, and they do keep coming back. We get periods free of the worst of it, often have low-key doubts in the background fairly frequently, and sometimes feel really good about writing. That's...writing. You haven't done anything wrong in your writing or in yourself when you have new insecurities coming in, and you've acknowledged yourself that things have already changed, because these are new or different insecurities. Think of it like an upward spiral, you circle back to feeling insecure, you have to if you want to keep going up.

You won't stay there forever, but the circling is part of the process. It can help to remind yourself of some cognitively true facts - what you think is perfect in writing is someone else's 'worst story ever' if they read it. What you love to read is not necessarily what you end up writing, and that doesn't mean it can't be someone's favourite story. And yeah, someone has already done something better by our standards, because I don't think there's any point on this journey where we go 'that's it, I've done it, I've become the best writer ever, insecurities begone!!!' (It would be nice, but it's not how it works).

So when insecurities come back it's not 'oh god I've failed at writing and/or keeping the insecurities away' it's - this is normal. You can go 'oh I'm being a regular writer right now, in the hard part of it.' I know this. It sucks. It probably means I need a break when it gets really bad, and I need to recharge a bit. I can keep improving, and my writing doesn't have to be anything other than entertaining. I've pretty much struck perfect from my vocabulary. It's too subjective.

I just wonder if you have ever feel this way before.

Anon, about twice a year I feel so bad about my writing I become convinced that the only answer is to delete all of it off my AO3 accounts. And on a regular basis I go between what I consider fairly normal insecurities (is that closing okay / is this arc good / will people like this character / have I pushed this too far / oh god my engagement is down am I terrible at writing), to pretty intense ones (idk why I do this nothing I write is good / how have I convinced these amazing people that this is worth their time / I wish I could write like (insert X author here) instead of this absolute mid shit etc.)

It helps me a lot to know that some of it is mental illness, but most of it is actually just normal. I'm a writer who wants my readers to have a good time and who wants to write something I can be proud of, and sometimes my brain won't let me feel proud of anything I've done because I made it, and sometimes I don't like myself very much. It means I should work on liking myself more. It doesn't mean I should stop writing.

I started writing as a kid, to cope with fairly awful life circumstances at home. So I was lucky that insecurities didn't matter because no one was seeing my writing except for me, I already hated myself (because people who were supposed to care for me, hated me - there's a reason I write the stories I do!) and I was literally trying to survive something that some people don't survive.

When I started sharing my writing, The Insecurities came. And...idk, I learned how to recognise it as a normal part of the process. It took a long, long time. It's normal to feel like there's something unique about how much we suffer over not liking our writing or feeling like it's bad, that the insecurities say something really true about our writing or even our integrity as a person.

Most of the time they say nothing at all except about the state of our mental health and how tired we are. For example, it's more normal for artists and writers to hate what they create during times of government unrest, or increased oppression, or in abusive households, because it's a way to redirect a lot of very unpleasant feelings to something we think we can control.

Sometimes it just happens because we're tired and the wave crashes over the dam we have in place that says 'go away insecurities.' Like you'd be amazed how much food, staying hydrated, getting good sleep / having good sleep hygiene can actually keep the worst of The Insecurities at bay.

Sometimes we need a break! Too much of a good thing in writing can lead to our brain trying to tell us we're terrible at it so we'll just walk away and watch some movies for a bit! The best way to prevent that is to take a break before we get there.

The good news is, you're a writer feeling something very normal for us writers. The bad news is that it feels bad. It can help to step back a bit, and also to join some writer's groups online maybe, ones that focus on support and lifting people up.

I wish I could say you one day hit a point where the insecurities never come back, but if anything, I don't think you can do these sorts of crafts without them. At their extremes they're not good for us, but the extremes of anything aren't good for us. You're not alone, I promise. The worst you've felt about your writing, is the worst many people have felt about their writing. It's just...often such a lonely process and many writers don't talk about it, but it's there, and it won't last. It's part of the spiral. Over time, you might find it easier when you know it's normal, and temporary, but frankly, there are times it's just really, really hard.

You will move past this, and then one day you'll touch on this again, and then you'll move past it again. Sometimes we spend longer in it than we wanted to, sometimes we need to take a longer break than we meant to, sometimes we write more than was good for us with how tired we were at the time.

It's not perfect, it's not supposed to be perfect, but it is part of the journey, it just means you're a writer like the rest of us writers, anon. I hope you can find your way back into writing more soon! And I hope you can be compassionate towards yourself. You put yourself out there, and have been writing, and honestly that's fucking amazing. I think you're awesome.

[girlwith15cents]

Oversharing on the internet about ADHD

I've been trying to write this post for awhile now. It relates to my previous post about mental disabilities. But it's proving difficult cause it keeps sounding too pathetic, but that's kinda the point.

I, in my present, have an idea of who I am. My interests, how I act, how I dress, who I associate with, my gender expression. These are all observable things. Ways that other people can form opinions on me. These are, by most means, who I am.

However, who I want to be is pretty drastically separate from that. I know a version of me that I can try and project but will always fall short of. I want to learn and enjoy makeup. I want a larger wardrobe of clothes that I genuinely like. I want to learn an instrument. I want to get into streaming games for fun. I want to be able to take my friends out to dinner and buy them gifts and go around the city with them. I have so many ideas for tattoos and I have piercings I want to get. There are so many things I want and yet cannot have and have no real avenue to get.

The reason I cannot reach for these (very reasonable) things is because of my lack of capital and personal agency. Extremely debilitating executive dysfunction has stripped me of any milestones of adulthood someone of my age might be seeing. I've never been able to hold a job without growing deeply suicidal due to the effort required. Hobbies cost money. Rent costs money. Expressions of the self cost money. I have always had to exist within the confines of someone else's generosity to take care of me. It has stripped me of opportunities to grow as a person. It has made me less and less who I want to be and more who I am.

All too often because of this people don't take me seriously. Financial burden that I am, I have learned to make myself small better than any other skill. I choke up when asked to assert my wants. I put others first. I'm quiet and guarded. Any strive to make myself the person I want to be feels deeply embarrassing. Like a child who is convinced they're something they aren't. So people who meet me see the child. They see the loser who won't take steps towards employment because they're lazy. They see the girl who orbits a social group but never belongs. They see a nice girl who has far less desirable qualities than the other candidate for this job position. It hurts so fucking bad to be condescended to without any ability to rebut it.

So when does it end? When I find work that won't end up being the death of me? When our government wises up and pushes for UBI or expands upon disability payments? When they invent adderal that doesn't have a million side effects? When I get sick of it and give up? There's no real end in sight, and every time ADHD gets laughed at as a pop-psych joke it gets further away. Am I doomed to be a child forever? When will I see the respect I know I deserve?

And sure, pathologizing behavior is 'bad'. Maybe the answer to all my woes is to grit my teeth harder than I already have been my entire life. Maybe the real reason I see no forward movement is because I'm projecting my own helplessness. But can't it be a little easier? Everyone else is having a rough time, but at least they're having a time. The behavior I exhibit is very normal to neurotypical people on a bad day, but it makes up my entire existence. And it sure feels a hell of a lot more severe than someone having a day of bad focus.

The fucked up thing about it is that I like me. The present me and the me I want to be. We both have so much to offer. We're both one of the best friends you've ever had. We both have skills and qualities that make us very likeable people. But these qualities have little to no monetary value. Any way that I could monetize it would also require investment. Investment that I cannot make without agency. So I'm stuck as a vague bundle of good qualities and talents that everyone sees so much potential in and is eagerly awaiting a moment where I channel it somewhere. A moment that will never occur without agency.

[lulu2992]

The majority or all of the cultists’ children are in John’s Gate, according to a note he wrote to Nick, but I’ve always imagined the reasons we didn’t see kids in Far Cry 5 were mostly technical and/or moral.

There were children in the previous title, Far Cry Primal, I believe for the first time in the series, and there are kids in the sequel, Far Cry New Dawn, but they can only be encountered in very controlled, weapon-free zones. Far Cry 5 doesn’t have these kinds of safe areas, so I guess the devs didn’t want to risk having wild animals, hostile NPCs, or even players hurt children in their games, which probably at least partly explains why they didn’t include them.

Another possible reason is that kids are small and need custom animations because they don’t interact with their environment the same way adult characters do, so I imagine it’s much easier for the devs if everyone is the same height. Children and teenagers would also have required new lines and voice actors, and maybe they didn’t have enough time or money for that...

I suppose Kim, who is pregnant and smaller than the rest of the characters (with the exception of Faith), can’t be seen outside of cutscenes for the same reasons: so no one can harm her (and her baby) and it doesn’t look awkward when she interacts with objects with her shorter-than-average arms. I think that also explains why, in New Dawn, in which she’s a “normal” NPC, she’s as tall as everyone else.

Zip mentions this issue, though! There are chances the devs wrote this line to humorously address the absence of children in their game, but here’s what he says:

Let me ask you something. You see any kids around here? Don't you think that's strange? I've been talkin' about it for years, but nobody listens. You know why that is? Baby Farms. It's all the rage in silicon valley. They're growing babies just to harvest them for body parts. I've seen it with my own eyes. Elon Musk has his personal farm half hour north of here. Terrifying stuff. Even worse is what they do with the unhealthy babies. The unhealthy ones are sent to the pits. The ultra elite love to gamble on baby pit fights. They attach little scalpels to their tiny hands and the babies have a Battle Royale until only one stands. I wouldn't have believed it myself, if I didn't discover the boxscores coded in Oprah's book club. Those poor poor babies.

And I like your idea of a group of Resistance teens or the Deputy meeting orphaned children! Narratively speaking, that sounds great!

I have a question, like a actually one for the fc5 community.

Where are the kids?

Nick mentions a school when talking about his soon-to-be born kid (we know daughter) calling Joseph "father". But where are the kids? Sure, the cult has been around for like 16 years and they probably grew up or like Jess, had dealt with the bad side of the cult (as if there is any good) or even left before! But like kim and nick, they were expecting while dealing with it. So, makes me wonder. If anyone else was expecting or was born during it. And were these kids orphaned? Not that many grown ups lived and if they did, it was few or in the cult.

I like to believe there is a group of kids (mainly teens) out in hope country that act like the resistence. Grown ups fail them so they end up protecting themselves and others like them.

[annasofthe11thdimension]

Waltz