#but also. montrose

[fataziraphale]

dilemma: I have obtained tumblr url montrose-pretty and am considering using it

pro: I fucking love TAZ Steeplechase and Montrose is my favorite character

con: every day I am fataziraphale is a declaration of the greatest hill I will die on and an invitation for Neilman to fight me in the pit

[karmathenightowl]

The one and only Shlabethany, along with the other npcs that appear in the Passion's Cove arc!

[yardsards]

summing up montrose pretty in one image/sentence:

[seefasters]

my take on the steeplechase trio (and montrose’s mask variants)

[cobalt-knave]

"No matter what, if you eat a coin, you are going to have a bad thursday." --Griffin McElroy, unrelated to his character eating a pin on TAZ Steeplechase, something he chose to do. Note: Said character did have a bad thursday as a result.

[oughtnots]

minor spoiler for todays Steeplechase, dont read this until youve listened to it -

Middle-aged/old Montrose truthers win!!!!!!!!

RISE UP BESTIES! HE'S OLD

[happy74827]

The Devil's Tango

{!!SPOILERS!! SEASON 4 EPISODES 1-6}

[Rhys Montrose x Female!Reader]

Synopsis: A certain professor is not very supportive of your relationship with the mayor-in-running.

WC: 2,741

Warnings: It's You... the show is warning enough.

The amount of people I see begging for an x reader of this man, and that no one had done it yet is actually hilarious. You would think after the first reveal, the whole fandom would jump at the sight of this man.

Though, realistically speaking, it's probably because he's one of those characters that are so hard to get right. Plus the fact that Part 2 didn't help in his favor at all.

I do plan to write more of him, so this is just a little tease if you will.

『••✎••』

“Hello, you.”

You jumped out of instinct, snapping your head towards the hoarse voice behind you. The chalk that you were currently using flew right out of your hand, soaring to hit the shadow that was now in front of you. Before it could hit your mystery stalker in the head, however, swift hands caught it just before impact.

“I… think you dropped this.” The sarcastic tone of an expired New Yorker made your fears fly away as your piece of chalk had. As you turned to meet the familiar brown eyes, you couldn’t help but give a slight smile.

“Oh, Jonathan,” You raised a hand to your chest, letting out chuckles in relief. “You scared me there, I wasn’t expecting anyone to visit at this hour.”

He stood in front of you blankly for a moment, as if someone had hit him with a “time freeze” superpower. You paid no mind to this of course, as it was a typical Jonathan Moore quirk. He clearly was very into his mind.

It almost reminded you of a certain… someone.

Jonathan snapped back to the present in no time with a soft, closed smile forming on his face. Within doing so, he handed you back your murderous chalk, before shoving his hands into the pockets of his trousers.

“Oh, no… no it’s totally my fault.” He apologized profusely, nudging his elbow towards the door. “The whole “not knocking” thing seems to be a nasty habit that only I can’t seem to get rid of.”

You nodded along to his apologies, despite already forgiving him the second you saw the familiar curls that fell down his forehead. It was pretty hard to hate the man that shared the same passion for poetry and was one of the professors that was teaching the same subject as you had.

“So, Jonathan,” you started, moving to lean your back against your desk. Your daily planner was down by your hips, along with the chalk. “What brings you to my classroom? Are you looking for some new recommendations?”

His face slightly faltered to the point where no normal, unobservant eye could witness it. The lip quiver, the slight wobbling of his left leg… they were all telltale signs of compressed emotions that an average joe wouldn’t think twice about — specifically, those who only knew the person on a surface level.

That wasn���t you, of course. You were observant to the point where it annoyed you. The constant paranoia that followed everyone’s movements practically ate you alive.

After a heap of silence, Jonathan sighed with his head facing downwards, his dark chocolate eyes refusing to look at you.

“It’s about Rhys Montrose.”

Your eyebrow raised in confusion at his words, your hands subconsciously resting on the desk, with your planner and chalk beside you. It was now you who had that blank daze.

“I…” You were absolutely speechless to the point where you could feel your jaw drop slightly. Jonathan knew Rhys? You’ve of course mentioned your relationship with Rhys to Jonathan himself, but you had no idea they had actually met. Honestly, you were still having a hard time believing that the nerd had met Lady Phoebe.

You straightened yourself, using your arms as leverage, as you looked at him with furrowed brows. “With how busy he constantly is now, I wasn’t even aware-“

“He’s not what you think he is.” Jonathan cut you off, his eyes shooting you to meet with yours. They were full of… worry?

“Jonathan, what are you—?“

His hands reached out to your shoulders, his body encasing you between himself and your desk. With every step he took closer to you, the more your eyes widened with confusion.

“You don’t know him, not like you think you do,” Jonathan whispered, “He’s a danger to society.”

You pulled his arms off of you, completely shocked by his tone. His phone buzzed as you looked at him bewildered, but he ignored his new text message. All he was focused on was you, just you.

“A danger to society? Jonathan, he’s just running for mayor.” You scoffed, turning back your attention to the chalkboard from before the librarian arrived. “You know, I didn’t take you for a man that’s into politics.”

“It’s not about fucking politics!” His hands slammed down on your desk. It caused you to jump, turning back towards the man only to find him mere inches from your face.

You tried to back away, but he pulled you right back in. “Jonathan—“

“You’re not listening!” His hands grabbed at your arms, his eyes darkened underneath the light you both stood under. “Rhys is a danger to society, he’s a danger to you.”

Jonathan continued to shake you and yell words into your ears, but everything around you went mute. The slightly muffled conversations from students down the hallways were silenced. You saw Jonathan’s lips moving, frantically, but you couldn’t hear. You didn’t want to hear.

“Jonathan, I think you need to leave.” You muttered to him coldly. It was a tone that would get anyone to stop and think, and he did just that. He paused, and it was then you gathered your strength and shoved him off of you for the final time. He stopped abruptly, his eyes questioning you.

He begged and pleaded with you to hear him out, but you refused. You refused to even glance in his direction. You were rarely an angry person, you usually kept it bottled up to come out in soft rants, but you were afraid if you said another word to Jonathan, you might just go ballistic to the point where you’d risk losing your valuable job, something you couldn’t afford to lose.

So, you told him to get out of your classroom once again and eventually he was forced to listen. He left when your familiar, upbeat students came pouring in one by one.

Despite the almost psychotic break dearest Jonathan had beforehand, class had gone rather smoothly for you. The students actually engaged with one another and focused completely on the short story at hand.

Not once had they gone off-topic. Then, of course, the devil shows up with a knock at your door, disrupting everything. It was one of the things you’ve hated the most, as you found it terribly rude, but your forgiving nature came into play when you realized it wasn’t the man you believed it to be. When you turned your head, it was Rhys who stood there with his hands crossed against his chest. He wore his signature suit and tie, which both complemented his figure and his eyes.

You gave him a slight smile in return, but the look he gave - the blue eyes devouring yours - had you following him outside the classroom rather immediately. You trusted your students enough to behave themselves.

Once outside the view of your students, Rhys gingerly wrapped his hand around your arm, guiding you to a secluded spot in the hallway that was sure not to draw attention. With Montrose's face being blasted everywhere as the mayor-in-running, it was hard finding privacy in public.

You were about to ask what it was that had him so upset to the point where he chased you down at work, but he beat you to it.

"Hello, darling," Rhys's voice sounded almost strained, tired even. It had been a while since you last saw him, not to mention that his friend Gemma had just recently become another victim of that so-called "Eat-The-Rich Killer," though Rhys had "admitted" that she wasn't his friend. If you recalled, he used the words, "Oh, piss off, you manky hypocrite" when he had last spoken with her. Still, the bags under his eyes suggested that he hadn't slept much the night before.

"Ah, nice to see you haven't changed your habits." Rhys covered his tiredness with a knowing smile as he gently leaned down to kiss the top of your head. "Maybe a psychology degree would be a better fit for you."

"Sorry," you apologized, looking slightly down. "It's just... not that I'm not glad to see that you're back, I really am, but are you okay? You look like you haven't slept for days, and you usually don't drop by the university unless there's a problem."

Rhys licked his lips, letting out a breathy laugh as he raised his hands to his hips. The tiredness in his eyes went away for a moment, resulting in him staring at you amusingly. A look that only took you a few seconds to realize you'd analyzed him once again.

You couldn't help but internally groan at yourself, but he only shot you another charming smile. It was one so enchanting that it made you swoon at the sight.

However, he eventually dropped that smile and sighed, caving into your concerns.

"I've had a long week," he confessed to you. "Oddly enough, I couldn't work my usual charm to get through to some... certain people, but I'm optimistic. Nothing a little persuasion won't fix."

"Me too, it's been a crazy morning." You agreed with a sigh. The incident with Jonathan within the previous hour was still fresh in your mind, haunting you to your core.

You never felt threatened by Jonathan, but as you recollected the scene, his body towering over yours with the desk blocking you from escaping. His arms held you, keeping you captive as he screamed about the man - the man who you loved with all your heart - wasn't the man you knew. That he was a façade, dishonest... an apparent danger to you.

Of course, you didn't believe Jonathan. You trusted Rhys with your life, but nothing about what Jonathan said sat right with you. He couldn't have known Rhys for more than six months, so why did he act as if he knew him better than you...

Rhys whispered your name, calling you back to face him. He was closer to you than he was before, with eyes that held his growing concern. As his hands gingerly reached out to caress your shoulders, you wanted to tease him about how he was now the observer, but you stayed quiet.

He didn't like that.

"Darling, what is it?" he pushed softly, his accent adding gentleness to his tone, "What happened?"

"It was… really odd," you muttered, your mind flicking back to your classroom, the way Jonathan's hands slammed down on the desk with sudden rage, how badly it made your heart skip a beat. "My coworker, Jonathan, he—"

Rhys cut you off. "You said, Jonathan?"

"Yes," you nodded.

"As in… Jonathan Moore?”

Huh, it seemed Jonathan wasn't lying to you about it after all. They really do know each other. The more you thought about it, however, made you wonder why Rhys never told you about him. He must have known you both worked in the same building.

You nodded to his question once again, lowering your eyes down toward the glassy floor beneath you. You didn't have to look at Rhys to know he was listening intently.

"Usually, Jonathan comes in to give or receive book recommendations, but today he was acting… really off," you glanced back up at him, as you began to quiver. "He was stating things about you, and shouting at me, and I… I don't know. It really threw me in for a loop."

Rhys' head snapped up at you like a lightning strike. His eyes no longer contained the concern he had held before. They darkened, as well as his voice.

"What did he say to you?"

"Something about how you were a danger to society, and apparently a danger to me," you shivered at the memory. "He shouted a lot of things really, but I canceled out the majority of them and threw him out, metaphorically of course."

Rhys mumbled under his breath. Unfortunately, it was something you couldn't quite pick up on. The only thing you could do was watch as he sucked on his tongue, making a face as though he was eating sour candy, before glancing up to meet your eyes again.

You stayed quiet, observing his newfound attitude. His jaw was clenched, with arms shifting towards the wall to encase you within them before letting his head fall and lean into you. He practically did what Jonathan did but with the wall instead of your desk, and despite the similarities, you weren't scared of Rhys. His eyes fluttered closed with his — now loosened tie — dangling out in front of you. His lips were only inches away from the base of your neck, and you couldn't help but take in his signature scent of grounded coffee grinds.

"Rhys," you whispered softly towards him, ruffling up his short hair slightly. He let out another sigh that unclenched his jaw and pushed himself closer to you. You couldn't help but notice how relieved he now seemed, letting out gentle, smooth huffs of air to take in the moment.

Unfortunately, as much as you'd like to stay like this — being you haven't had him for a week — you still had a class to teach. Regrettably, you forced yourself to peel away from his arms, whispering short apologies and promises to see him later.

You didn't look back as you retreated back to your classroom. Upon returning to your desk, you turned to see that every single one of your students either gave you a smirk or a knowing nod, and you couldn't help but threaten them with a pop quiz that you were positive they weren't prepared for. As expected, it shut them right the hell up.

Ah, the power of being a professor.

———

When Jonathan arrived home that night with his now empty red takeout bag, he couldn’t help but sense the feeling that he was being watched. His feeling turned out to be correct when he went to unlock the door of his apartment, only to find it already unlocked.

The professor froze momentarily, hesitating whether he should enter unarmed or retrieve a nearby weapon. But being in sight of absolutely nothing, he had no choice but to grudgingly step inside.

As expected, when closing the door behind him, the lights of his living room flickered on and within the light revealed the man he most desperately wanted to kill.

The unwelcome man sat on his chair like he owned the place. A martini resided in his hand as he gave a sarcastic smile. The yellow light mixed in with the fiery flames of the fireplace reflected the same unnerving expression.

“Hello, Professor Moore,” the man spoke with amusement as he turned to face the bearded killer. His accent had the falsified name rolled off in a tease.

The owner rolled his eyes as he dropped the bag he held down at his feet. His keys were put safely back into his pocket. He should’ve known this would happen.

“Despite how much I would love to carve out your marvelous attractive eyes,” the man stood up, swirling the drink in his hand as he approached the professor. “I have to admit, Joe, I underestimated your intelligence. I knew you were smart, since the very beginning mind you, but this was just… impressive.”

Joe ground his teeth. “What do you want with me, Rhys? Why are you even here?”

“Two things, really,” Rhys smacked his lips together, nodding his head as he looked down for dramatic effect. When he glanced back up at the professor, his amusing smile was gone. His hand stopped swirling the martini, keeping it eerily still, and his eyes darkened almost instantly.

“Remember what we talked about, Joe, with the replacement. I want it done within twenty-four hours. If not, as I said earlier, you’ll be going down for everything.”

Joe’s breath hitched as Rhys stalked closer to his body. The piercing blue eyes caused the professor to freeze in his thoughts, forcing him to watch for Rhys’ unpredictability.

“And if you ever come near my girl again,” his voice was ghostly, sending chills throughout Joe’s entire body. “I’ll be the one who throws your ass in the cage.”

As if he were a light switch, Rhys pulled his lips into a grin within seconds. In a calm manner, he forced his half-sipped martini into the professor’s hands before seeking himself out.

For the first time in a long time, Joe Goldberg felt uneasy.

*Rhys x reader being nonexistent on Tumblr*

Me:

[montrosepretty]

Loved her rendition of Dream It To Now at the annual feast of the seven {which takes place nightly}

[i-find-the-beauty-in-chaos]

[seriousbrat]

100% agree on the last post! James is the norm in terms of teenage boys in his society, unfortunately that is not speaking much of that society considering he’s blackmailing his crush through doing harm to her friend and pantsing people. Which is honestly the problem, that specific behavior isn’t seen as an issue it’s the other stuff he does (his arrogance is what’s mostly focused on by the other characters). Looking at violence and gender in that society and how it functions, I really don’t think James is transgressing any of these norms but falling right into them. Which again is the problem. His behavior is a product of the culture which shaped him, that’s not an excuse, but it is an explanation.

Exactly. Like on a scale from Woke Feminist King to Inbetweener, I think James would have been decent enough, average, like I said, maybe even a little bit better than average because of his sense of 'honour' or whatever lol. But not that much.

Also, I know people might not agree with this but I do think the WW is less misogynistic than the Muggle. I think this is logical in a society where magical ability is what primarily contributes to raw labour rather than physical strength. Not to get Marxism 101 on everyone but if we look at the origins of patriarchy as based in the Agricultural Revolution, the division of labour following the emergence of private property (men work in fields, women produce men to work fields, men accumulate resources) is somewhat lessened if everyone can use magic equally, and when women can defend themselves very effectively against becoming the resources that are accumulated.

I say somewhat because yes, women (cis women, I don't think we can expect neolithic farmers or Engels to be trans inclusive haha) are still the ones who can give birth. Obviously for this reason (and also because of influence from the Muggle world) the WW is still a patriarchy and misogyny does still exist, just slightly less acutely than in the real world, and women have an easier time advancing within it.

(((In pureblood society, because they value bloodlines and heirs, there is undoubtedly more misogyny. But we know from pottermore that pureblood supremacy is a relatively recent advent, certainly much more recent than the Agricultural Revolution and the emergence of private property haha. I can imagine that misogyny grew stronger alongside pureblood supremacy quite naturally. This is why Narcissa acts more as a handmaids tale esque wife to Lucius than Lily or Tonks or even Molly and Fleur, who are still housewives themselves.)))

I think there's evidence of women generally faring a bit better in the WW, such as female Ministers long, loooong before Muggle women even had the vote, and culturally I think this is reflected too:

From the intro to Beedle the Bard, which goes on to talk about 'The Warlock's Hairy Heart' in which the female character does have a passive role, so it's not like this is unheard of, just a bit less common. In 'The Fountain of Fair Fortune,' the aforementioned Asha, Altheda, and Amata are all much more useful and powerful and active characters than Sir Luckless who basically just follows them around. (I actually really like that story, and 'Hairy Heart' is delightfully creepy. Probably my faves.) James would have grown up with these stories.

Anyway this got VERY off track but for for this reason too, I think James and the other Marauders would probably be a little bit better than their Muggle equivalents, but also not perfect. Just like Ron, to whom it's perfectly normal that Hermione would be top in everything and that Gwenog Jones ('THE Gwenog Jones') would be someone to idolise, but he also displays misogyny such as when he calls Hermione a 'scarlet woman' lol. As do others. (For contrast, ask an average teen boy in our world to name 3 female football players. Yeah.)

And yes maybe some of it is jkr's learnt misogyny leaking through too, from growing up in a patriarchy along with the rest of us (and let's be objective about this, she has been a victim of it too, very much so.) But personally I think the WW still being misogynistic but slightly better than irl actually ends up being realistically relatable while also providing a level of escapism and aspiration for young girls. It doesn't feel that inconsistent to me but idk. Hermione easily outstripping her male peers in intelligence and talent, Ginny and other female Quidditch players being on the level of men and often better, and this just being accepted, was inspiring for me, anyway.

[babooshkart]

Oh, right. The rituals. The skin touching rituals, the intricate rituals you construct to touch the skin of other men, man-touchin rituals.

Commission for @skeptiquewrites 💕 thank you for joining me in Sports Thighs Appreciation

[emily-in-crisis]

YOU SEASON 4 SPOILERS

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I know the killer being rhys was incredibly predictable but his "'ello joe" kinda ate

[karmathenightowl]

Gutter City is probably my favorite pre-Kiddiedelphia arc if I'm being honest, so here are some various drawings from that! Along with that scene with Emerich and Sticky Fingers Paul Pantry :'(

[cookie-nom-nom]

This one scene. Did so much for my polycule head-canon AND my Ace Emerich head-canon.

[seefasters]

taz steeplechase ep 32 doodles

[somewhere-to-be]

Stuff I would've liked to see if Rhys was real and not Joe's hallucination and Joe got over his hangup and did accept that he was a cold-blooded psycho killer and he likes killing actually, especially these people:

Rhys actually being friends with 'Jonathan Moore' and coming to the university to give a talk to his class about voting in the elections or something and Nadia sensing something off about their closeness because of course she would

Kate feeling like the third wheel when the three of them hang out together at Sundry House because what Rhys and Joe have is more than friendship

Joe actually liking Lady Phoebe and learning about Adam's plans to marry her for money and with Kate's suspicions about him being not good for her, decides to take out Adam next and tells Rhys who is absolutely thrilled that Joe is finally initiating things

Rhys and Joe bickering about the best way to kill (Joe makes his plans but he tends to go overboard when things go wrong and kills people accidentally way more often than not. Rhys who prefers planning every detail and contingency before they get into it)

But Gemma being who she is says something insensitive in front of Rhys when the group is discussing his plans as a mayor and also jokingly says that Jonathan might be the killer

Rhys getting super mad and killing Gemma the first opportunity he gets - not just because of what she said about minorities but because he's now more protective of Joe

Joe being the one who has to help Rhys get rid of the evidence this time and control him from going on any more anger-fueled kills because Rhys might also kill Roald the same way

Joe and Rhys staging Gemma's murder as another Eat-the-Rich killer death and Rhys giving more interviews about crime in London going unchecked because he has to but also talking more about wealth inequality and how the city's resources are being misappropriated

Rhys and Joe talking about books in between murders, Joe telling him about his work as a professor and how proud he is of his students especially Nadia who has written this great book (yes, he actually reads it) - and Rhys also agrees to read it

Nadia being so happy about getting feedback from the actual Rhys Montrose, the literary sensation, is reading her book that she forgets all about the off vibes she got and secures her future as a successful student who gets her degree without getting wrapped up in any murder business beyond reading about Eat the Rich killer in the news

Rhys and Joe finally executing their plan of capturing Adam but Roald's there too so they get them both and kidnap them

Adam being confused about why he's there at all and begging for his life because he's actually broke and saying how he thought they were friends

Roald just being a dick about it and saying how he always knew Jonathan was a killer but he tries appealing to Rhys saying he's a good person and Jonathan has probably corrupted him

Joe and Rhys just exchanging amused glances while this happens and then killing them together, like the murder husbands they are

But this happens to take a bit longer than they planned for and Joe is late to meet Kate

Rhys confronting Joe about the feelings they share because Joe might still be 'dating' Kate but Kate will never know him like he does

Joe just thinking about Rhys the whole time he is with Kate and then they hear the news about Adam and Roald's murder and he has to pretend to be shocked and Kate gets distracted by what's happening so she doesn't say anything for now

Kate's father sending even more security to her which makes her confide in Jonathan about her past with her father and how much she dislikes him

As Kate's father is also having articles published against Rhys

Joe talking to Rhys about it and they decide to kill her father together - but Rhys only agrees on the condition that Joe ends things with Kate because if he is the one to comfort her after her father dies knowing he's the reason for his death, he actually might have a psychotic break

Plus, isn't it better for her now that she's free? Wouldn't she want to start a new life, away from everyone who reminds her of the terrible time she's had the last couple of months with everyone dying?

Joe reluctantly agrees

Joe uses Kate's phone to call Kate's father to a meeting point where he'll be alone and Rhys and Joe ambush him

Tom Lockwood is actually surprised that Rhys is the Eat the Rich killer - he knew Jonathan was Joe and capable of killing but Rhys was a complete surprise

Rhys hears him try to talk his way out of this - Tom Lockwood even agreeing to back his election campaign but Rhys doesn't want his dirty money funding his run and he's confident he can win on his own

Joe is more than a little proud of that

Rhys lets Joe kill him - but he knows that if Joe isn't the one to pull the trigger, there is a chance he can rationalize his way out of it and get back together with Kate so he has to be the one to shoot Tom Lockwood

Joe knows what Rhys is doing but he goes along because he does feel something for Rhys that he doesn't with Kate, not at all

Joe and Rhys framing Lockwood's death as a suicide because otherwise it would draw too much attention

Rhys being a little sad they couldn't credit his death to the Eat the Rich killer, which was now their shared persona together, it would've been their magnum opus, but at least they'll always know it was them who pulled it off

Kate having conflicting feelings about her father's death, not believing that he would kill himself

Joe pulling away from Kate but also nudging Lady Phoebe to be there for her

Kate seeing Jonathan talk to Rhys and sees their chemistry that's now even more obvious and making the move to break up with him

And when Nadia hears about this, she just accepts that the vibes she got from Joe and Rhys was just them being in love and nothing sinister

Kate going on a vacation somewhere far away with Lady Phoebe

Rhys winning the election as the mayor because of course he would

Rhys coming to Joe's door on his winning night because he's the only one he wants to celebrate with

Joe already having a bottle of the best champagne ready because he knew Rhys would come

And finally, them planning their future together and setting their sights on the bad people in politics