#but also kind of sad especially when other people dont understand whats going on and make it worse

[caffeinatedopossum]

Me and my cat are exactly the same and it's hilarious. Like my gf just got a new rug to go over a cord we have on the floor (my autism along with some other factors make me really clumsy and I WILL trip over it so yeah) but she had me feel the rugs at the store because she wants one that's also an okay texture for me. Well she grabbed one and showed it to me and it's just *chefs kiss* very good texture. So immediately when she lays it down at home, me and the cat both sit on it before she's even done adjusting it XD

[ganondoodle]

since i have seen this argument pop up again and again and now its used to defend the minecraft movie

i really hate the argument that something, be it a movie or a game, can be as shitty as it wants when its primarily aimed at kids (or people THINK it is aimed mostly at kids) bc its 'just for kids'

like children are lesser an stupid? like they arent incredibly impressionable and deserve good movies? im not saying they should only watch critical acclaimed drama movies, but you can make a movie 'for kids' AND make it good, its been done before, sure there will always be shit movies, and thats fine, but dismissing any kind of criticism towards them bc "its just for kids" feels so unecessarily mean spirited towards children, like they are little people in wildly different stages of development!! they can think too!!

'kids' itself is such a wide range that i feel its not very useful as a category anyway, a 5 year old isnt the same as an 11 year old, both of them should get good things, and both can watch or play things they may not completely understand yet! i grew up with shrek, and while a big parody and haha fart humor movie, they (1+2) have an incredibly strong core, i didnt udnerstand them fully when i was little, so what? i still enjoyed them, i felt more connected to them than any disney movie (bc hey .. the monster is the main guy and no they dont all turn into conventionally pretty humans as the ultimate reward- i felt othered throughout my life too) and i still do, theres jokes and themes and meaning i understood fully only when i was rewatching them as an adult, i still enjoy them even at 27

and like, shouldnt it ESPECIALLY matter what children watch? (not in the puritan brain worm way) bc they are ... people in development?? do you think if they just sit down and watch shitty movies and play games that dont challenge them at all, be it thinking critically or emotionally, all day it wont have an affect on them??

(im sorry to bring up totk again, but that 'its for kids' argument has been used to defend it so much too, and its so incredibly annoying to me, ah yes, its puzzles are all skippable or easy as shit bc its main target are kids and children are stupid and shouldnt be challenged ever, the story is a simple fairytale type deal maybe to you, but contains alot of harmful stereotypes that have led to real world harm and its repeated unquestionably while offering nothing intersting to think or engage with, theres a reason alot of childrens media contains alot of stereotypes to propaganda even but its just for kids of course its not propaganda bc kids are stupid and cant understand that lol BECAUSE they are so impressionable, if a series 'for kids' only lets the girls be in frilly pink dresses and do 'girly' stuff do you not think that wil affect how they think about themselves??

if they keep seeing the light skinned blonde heroe stab the unquestioned evil arab stereotype bc he wants to take over your holy land bc hes just 'evil' and is never ever humanized in any way and only presented as a monster, while the good little maiden princess does everything she can to support her hero in shiny armor with big sad doe eyes and pretty little white dress- do you not think it will affect them? if it were an isolated incidence perhaps not much, but its a stereotype perpetuated to such a degree that you think its just 'how fairytales go'? yeah, you have been influenced by these portrayals, they are working as intented- and if they are used as such in media without the writer intending to influence you that way? thats even worse bc it means it has been so normalized to think that way people dont even realize it- while alot of real people in the world are ganondorf, they are demonized and dehumanized, others think of them as inherently evil.. but its just a "simple fairytale"

yes i know children can also question things on their own, but you shouldnt assume that comes naturally and then also in just the correct way, i questioned why i was just doing whatever the talking boat told me to do when i first played windwaker as a kid, but more bc i liked how ganondorf looked and hated being told things to do without a good reason being given (autism much?), 'evil' didnt do it for me, but that doesnt mean i knew he was an evil arab stereotype, i didnt like tetra turning white as zelda, bc i thought she looked cooler before and i didnt like 'girly' things myself, not bc i knew it was whitewashing

-not saying media should be free of anything 'problematic', the problem is how its presented and never questioned or engaged with critically and then that stupid argument being used to dismiss it like children are both unable to think and not influencable somehow-)

[glossykissies]

Butcher's hatred for vought only worsening after meeting hybrid!puppy reader bc of what they did to her makes me so sad :( he's just an old angry man who gives off ultimate protective daddy vibes

ok trigger warning for this arc bc it goes into her abuse but

yes bc i feel like it takes a while for her to understand that the abuse she faced wasn’t okay / normal and it’s not just butcher that feels that way it’s everyone. like whenever she messes up infront of the boys she just puts her head down and braces, and when hughies like “wait, what are you doing?” pup is all

“oh, well, back at the lab if i messed up they’d punch me in the stomach real hard so i don’t do it again?” :(((((

and m.m has to take her aside and explain that she’s not gonna be physically assaulted for messing up, especially not over something so tiny? “no one is laying a hand on you in here, you hear me? if they do? they’ll have to answer to me.” he adds the last part with a playful smile, trying to keep the tone light — but upon turning to you, his face falls, seeing the tears on your cheeks.

“really?”

“what— yeah. we may be a bunch of ruthless motherfuckers but beating on someone as defenceless as you — no offence, well that’s where i draw the line. look, you’re safe here kid.” he turns his full body to you, large frame crouched a little subconsciously to seem less intimidating. “don’t mean you won’t get yelled at by butcher from time to time, but i’m tryna get a handle on that.” he pats your back with a smile, shuffling to get up but you throw your arms around him.

“thank you, m.m.”

his brow creases, knowing that sort of thing shouldn’t warrant a thank you.

“we’re takin’ this one step at a time.” he hums.

kimiko also serves as great comfort, knowing what it’s like to face abuse and be confused when faced with kindness. sometimes she finds you sitting alone, not your usual energetic self and she comes and sits with you — typing things out on her phone to communicate with you.

are you having a bad day?

“yeah. i don’t miss the lab, but sometimes i wish i didn’t have the responsibility of being a full… person. at least when people treated me like a dog i didn’t have to think too hard.” you sigh and she nods, taking a moment to type.

i understand. i don’t miss my past, but some days i kind of wish i could go back just so i could hang out with my brother one more time.

“yeah. i get that.”

after a pause, she types some more.

did you have any brothers or sisters?

“no. it was just me. i always wished i had a sister to play with though.”

kimiko smiles, happily typing something into her phone before proudly turning it around.

well guess what? we’re sisters now. you can be my little sister. i always wanted one of those.

you beam, tail thudding the side of the chair you’re curled on as it starts to wag and your mood is infectious, the girl throwing her arm around you into a side hug.

butchers hate does infact worsen and it causes him to act up, get more violent than before — violently destroying anyone with a finger dipped into the vought pie. you always assumed it was because of his own past, but one day you witnessed him beating on someone who had something to do with the hybrid operation. cowering in the doorway, you try to keep your frightened whimpers at bay at hear him berating the bloody man through grit teeth.

“what you did to ‘er? what your fuckin’ people did to that girl? she’ll never be the bloody same and that’s all because of you. you’re gonna rot in hell, cunt.” before delivering the final blow to his skull.

you’re shaking, and only when he’s pulled himself off the corpse he sees you— having watched the entire thing. he softens slightly, eyes flickering with shame as he presses his lips together but you slowly approach, wide eyed.

“dont be scared pup, i ain’t�� i just couldn’t let ‘im get away with it. can’t let scum like that keep walkin’ this earth.” he thinks you might bolt, like he’s seen you do on other occasions— but this time you approach, wrapping your arms around him, nuzzling into him, ears twitching, tail wrapping around his thigh.

[phopollo]

*getting on my hands and knees* Please I would love to know more about your fairytail rewrite, I have also just decided to do a rewatch of it and I am dying for more content/more people to talk about it with (also i love your designs so far and especially the focus on my girl Juvia... would love to know your ideas for both ex phantom lord guys actually)

AKFNWKG OMG HI YOU DONT UNDERSTAND HOW HAPPY THIS MAKES ME

GAJEEL & JUVIA MEAN SO MUCH TO ME, BOTH INDIVIDUALLY AND AS A DUO, AND I WAS SO SAD ABOUT HOW THEYRE TREATED IN CANON (especially Juvia,,, she was my favorite, but she got done so dirty when they stopped allowing her to he her own character outside of loving Gray,,,) SO IM ELATED YOU WANNA KNOW MORE ABOUT THEM, BECAUSE I THINK ABOUT THEM SO MUCH

So!!

I'll start with them as a duo

While members of Phantom Lord, none of the Element 4 were really like.... friends per say, but Gajeel and Juvia had the closest thing to being like........ friendly coworkers of all the relationships among them. Juvia was kind of the only one Gajeel really respected, and Juvia recognized thar Gajeel treated her with as much respect as he could, so she reciprocated (think like,,, verbally acknowledging each other as they passed in the halls, but calling each other by last name)

After joining Fairy Tail, in the immediate aftermath, everyone was still a little cautious of them for understandable reasons. So they kind if unintentionally cling to each other, because..... yknow. They're the only ones not giving each other the side eye, so it doesn't feel like they have to claw through a wall of tension to just hold a simple conversation

The turning point for them into actual friendship is when people start to give them more of a chance! In particular, on a day that Fairy Tail is getting A Bit Rowdy(tm) in the guild hall, and Gajeel turns around, expecting Juvia to have his back, and shes.... she's not there........... and now that he thinks about it, it's been a bit rainy today............... so he gets a little worried and goes looking for her, only to find her hiding in the bathroom because she got a bit overwhelmed and overstimulated because she's never had so many people approach and try to talk to her all at once and never been involved in a brawl like that that wasn't an actual like, fight, and she just...... she needs a minute. So. Gajeel sits with her a bit, because. Yknow. It wouldn't be worth it to go out there and pick fights with everyone and have fun if she's not also going to. It's just not as fun

They get a little awkward sitting there in silence and Gajeel gets antsy. He looks at himself in the mirror, and then down at Juvia and her perfectly styled hair. He goes "Hey wanna help me wash my hair?" And she kind of. Stares at him for a few seconds.

(Bonus doodles of when I was initially thinking about this but never planned to post bc my hand writing is ILLEGIBLE)

So Gajeel takes care of his hair now (very important about him and his character and the change in his hair style between Phantom Lord and Fairy Tail)

And after that, they accidentally become Natsu-And-Lucy-But-Cool-Tones

And they're very silly, and I love them very much

Whoops, that on its own was a little longer than I intended, but I'll still go into them individually too

Gajeel;

His insecurity about falling behind the other dragon slayers is a little more prevelant-- he just kind of always feels like he has something to prove

An important part of the Rewrite to me is thst there's the opportunity for characters who didn't really seem to interact as much get the opportunity to, so I'll also put out there thst Gajeel forms pretty tight bonds with Wendy, Erza, team Shadow Gear as a whole not just Levy, and the Strauss siblings

I don't think he really knows what he actually likes to do in his free time. He kind of just tags along with other people doing things they like to do

He's roughly very similar to how he was in canon. A lot of the work I've done on him has been more just smoothing out the edges and adjusting his behavior to reflect the people I've declared him the closest to

Juvia;

It's so important to me that she gets to be a character outside of being in love with Gray. She does still have a crush on him, and she's not super subtle about it, but she's also like.... she's capable of being a normal person around and about him. They are genuinely friends above anything else

She had no idea how to talk to anyone. Cana and Mirajane were lowkey her saviors when it came to learning how to interact with other people and not be a complete freak, so she's super tight with them in particular

In canon, we were shown both thst she made her own Teru Teru Bozus, and that she knit Gray a scarf once. There's also a couple other things we're shown that its never explicitly state she made them, but I feel like the implication is there. So I'm taking those and running with them-- I'm making her a really crafty person, and she loves and takes a lot of comfort in doing things like sewing, knitting, and crocheting, and that's something she notably does in her free time-- especially since she doesn't just do them for the sake of doing them, she almost always makes something for someone (got a little drawing about this incoming actually)

We only really got to know the bare minimum of Juvia's backstory-- that her parents are dead, she was taken in by her uncle who did his best to help her and her rain problem by seeking out water and ice wizards, and then he also died while seeking help for her-- so I've expanded on it a little and made some minor changes! Longest story short; her father died in a workplace accident before she was born, and her mother died during child birth, which is what lead to her being taken in by her uncle. As much as he loved her and was doing his best with her, he also kind of always resented her and blamed her for the death of his sister (her mom) even though it really was not her fault. Juvia sort of always recognized this, but also as a traumatized child, blamed herself, which lead to the intensifying of the rain around her as she got older and understood things better. That's when her uncle started looking for other water wizards and ice wizards to try and help stop the rain. He went out one day to meet with one, and he never came back. Juvia doesn't know if something happened or if the resentment finally built of too much and he just up and left, and that's something she's never going to get closure on. It definitely still plagues the back of her mind and affects the way she acts now, even if she thinks she's moved past that point in her life.

Woah

That was a lot, sorry akfbskd

I hope this was at least some of what you wanted to hear about them!!

[apollos-olives]

Hey I'm burmese (living under dictatorship and civil war rn) and I just wanted to say that as someone who's also had to fear for their lives and fear for the lives of my family, I sympathise with you. Obviously we're going through different things but I can understand the fear of being absolutely terrified for your familys lives and I just wanted to remind you it's okay to cry and let it out sometimes and you dont have to be "strong" all the time. Maybe im projecting but i know I'm guilty of it and idk. I get putting on a brave face for everyone because you don't want others to lose hope or you don't want them to be discouraged. But you don't have to do that. Youre also not letting your oppressors "win" by being upset. It's perfectly okay and normal to be scared and "weak" sometimes. Especially when experiencing such a traumatic awful situation. I believe in your people and Palestine will be free one day in our life time, I can feel it. But don't forget to look after yourself too

I hope this is okay to say. My English isn't the the best and we're obviously in different circumstances but I just really resonated with some of what you said about worrying for your family and wanted to reach out. Be kind to yourself. 🇵🇸🇲🇲

god this is so sweet, thank you. i know i should probably treat myself better and let myself be weak sometimes but it's so hard actually being vulnerable because people love taking advantage of that. i want to be kinder to myself but i was never allowed to before. but thank you for this message, i'll try my best 🫶 i can totally understand how you relate being worried about your family being in danger, and while it's sad we even have to have that in common, it's comforting to know that other people understand ❤️

[lorelaiislatte]

Do you think there's a chance a streaming service will pick ncis:h? I've signed the petition but do we dare to hope? I'm tired of this happening all the time. I just dont understand. It was doing fine in ratings and it's a part of a franchise that keeps getting more spin offs? How that makes sense? Do you know the ratings compared with the others ncis shows? Sorry im asking you but im not from usa and i have no idea how american netwoks work. So sad rn.

okay SO i am also not from the us but have done this dance before sooooo:

1) from what i’ve heard, they were planning to move either another ncis show (i think sydney?) or another cbs show to paramount plus - which they now are no longer doing. in theory yes, this opens up the possibility for ncishi to move over there; in practice, i’m not holding my breath, as typically that negotiation would happen before a cancellation announcement

2) how does it make sense? the honest answer is that it doesn’t. like, it really doesn’t. it’s been holding steady at sixth of 14 cbs shows in the ratings (which is a brilliant number, ensures it’s profitable, and is also impressive for a procedural that’s still relatively new). it’s been beating a LOT of other crime procedurals in viewership and viewer retention, and reviewers have been singing its praises. i think this is why it feels so much as if it’s because they just view this show as less valuable (socially and economically) than their usual white guy cop shows; it’s very difficult to argue that your profitable, successful show is too expensive when you’re flying cast and crews across - or, potentially, internationally to - australia, to continue a less-highly-rated show with no issue.

3) as far as ratings go - ncis hawai’i episodes were pulling in as many as 10 million viewers last year (s2 e10 came in with 10.5 mil, as per variety telecast viewership reports) which has it going toe to toe with the core ncis (seems to pull approx. 8-10mil per episode, via hollywood reporter). for the 18-49 demographic across us series, ncis hawaii is ranking at #13 of #21 as per tvseriesfinale.com - this is significantly above ncis sydney (renewed, #15), and elsbeth (#19, renewed), two other cbs shows, one of which in particular is incredibly expensive. crucially, ncishi has actually increased its viewership, which is VERY difficult to do on a year to year basis. its up by 4.18% among 18 to 49 year olds - for comparison the core NCIS is down 0.83% and fbi international - a competing show - is down by 3.73%. bear in mind that even a single percentage point represents hundreds of thousands of viewers.

i also want to point out that ranking at #13 isn’t strictly representative of viewer numbers, it’s about percentage of viewers that are within that core age bracket. the neighbourhood is ranking at #6, but only pulling in 4.8 million viewers - ncishi is at #13, and pulling in 5.2 million. ncishi pulls in over half a million more viewers than four shows ranked above it in that chart.

so essentially - it doesn’t make sense. from any perspective. it doesn’t make sense from a business perspective (ncis sydney is more expensive to produce and brings in approx. 200k less viewers than ncishi, and ncishi crew had already agreed to a shortened, budget-restrained final season), it doesn’t make sense for a ratings perspective (it continues to outperform many of cbs’ own shows, including ones that have been renewed), it doesn’t make sense from a social perspective (people are loving it, even outside of our fandom spaces).

objectively, it’s a really, really bad move by cbs. i also thought being part of a franchise would be a kind of safety net - fool me once, i guess. all the evidence suggests that they just don’t care enough about ncishi, especially when they’ve got their bullshit white guy ncis origins show, a young sheldon spinoff (?? who asked?) and a plethora of other cookie-cutter shows they can just keep going with. and we can make a pretty educated guess as to why, when the main things that set ncishi apart from the other ncis shows are its diversity and character dynamics

(edit: it was pointed out that people aren’t being flown to sydney from the us, which is true, and bad phrasing on my part - but many are flown across australia at seemingly similar costs to mainland us/hawai’i flights, and i believe not all of the leads are based in australia either, so i’ve updated that bit for clarity. apologies!)

[loemius]

31. What post have you seen recently that makes you wanna scream lmao <3

oh boy youre asking me for the spicy hot takes tonight huh. i am always happy to deliver <3 i dont want to put anyone in particular on blast so ill refrain from mentioning specific posts, but i do find that a lot of content lately in the helpol sphere has been very... surface level. a lot of moodboards, a lot of basics, 101 level content, stuff like 'the gods love you!!'. which isn't inherently a bad thing whatsoever. there is a need for that kind of content! however, i've also noticed in my 2 years on helpol tumblr that a lot of the reconstructionist blogs and informative blogs that i used to follow have either went inactive or deactivated entirely. and i can't help but wonder why this is. i think there's a lot of reasons for it: frustration with the shallowness of content leading to people going off and becoming more solitary practitioners, the more you grow in your practice the less compelled you may become to share it, but also i think a lot of people use tumblr and people's ask boxes as a search engine and that leads to a lot of burnout. it certainly did for me -- i took a hiatus from posting for a long time because i wasn't in a place to educate people. it's a lot of pressure, especially on tumblr where it feels like people will jump down your throat if you're incorrect about things or you suddenly become an Authority that people look up to when youre just a person. people who were posting really helpful and informative content about the theoi simply arent here anymore, and i really think the community's gravitation towards easily consumable content and reliance on people to do research for them is a large part of this. i realize not everyone is recon, which is very much okay, although i personally love being recon. that being said, i still think you should do your best to do your research and understand where these ideas come from. they didn't appear out of thin air -- mediterranean culture is very much alive still and is a continuation of the ancient world, and to not acknowledge or understand it is disrespectful to both the cultural context of the theoi and mediterranean people whose culture we claim to revere. i don't expect everyone to become an academic or a classicist. its not accessible to everyone for a variety of reasons, but i do think like. checking out some of the primary sources in a way thats accessible for you or picking one really good book to really deep dive into would benefit a lot of people. basically, i just wish i saw more in depth posts and people engaging on a deeper level with their faith and being willing to post it so we can have more discussions as a community and grow together. helpol is unique among other polytheistic religions because we have a wealth of primary sources available to us, and that isn't always the case for other polytheistic religions. i think it's... honestly kind of sad that we don't really talk about them. its not that i dont want to see peoples upg or that i dont think there should be posts for beginners, because there is a place for it and i enjoy that content too, but i wish there was more variety in the kinds of posts we have in the community. i miss the days when the tags were full of people writing their own prayers or people talking about a new source they read and what they thought, or compiling something for their own practice and being willing to share it with the community. i guess this is my sign to get back to posting my own original content and make the kind of content i want to see in hopes it'll encourage others to do the same. anyway i got on my little soapbox about this and its time for me to hop off before i hit character limit (again lmao). thank you so much for this ask, this was really refreshing and cathartic for me to talk about. may the gods bless you with health, happiness, and love always <33

[ropebuny]

Sunshine, if you can identify recommend finding a therapist or looking up resources on self acceptance online. I dont mean this as a drag or insult i genuinely recommend it to everyone and hope you find ways to decrease the negative self talk and othering of yourself. Theres no ‘normal’ with anyone, everyone’s got some type of freak in them! Youre young and still have so much to go through but you dont need to make it worse by idealizing some idea of normalcy that NO ONE can reach. Youre not hurting anyone and dont deserve to hurt yourself as some sort of self inflicted penance for the trauma you went through. I know its not easy and it took me a whole lifetime to even learn how to chip away the negativity but it’s so worth it and i hope you learn to accept yourself the way youre so open to accepting others because you deserve it!

hi hello thank you for the kind message, anonie. I have a wonderful psychiatrist and I have been seeing him for the past 2 or 3 years at this point. I sometimes talk about my sexual life with him and talk about how gross I feel for my kinks and he makes me feel better by saying similar things, how I’m not hurting anyone and that there is no normalcy I should strive for when there is no such thing. some days are much better than others. some days I feel comfortable in my kinks and my sexual fantasies, but other times I feel like a complete freak that should just stick to vanilla sex because I don’t want to freak people out. this negative outlook comes especially when I talk to people about kinks irl because my country can be pretty conservative and I’ve never met anyone irl who is into ‘weird’ kinks like me. everyone so far has just been weirded out or thought I was a freak. I forget that irl people aren’t part of these niche online communities where we are all comfortable with these things and understand them. and then I’m hit with a reality check that I will probably never meet anyone irl who is willing/comfy to indulge in ‘weird’ immoral kinks. which makes me feel quite sad because I don’t want to shun this part of me away. but every day it feels more and more like I really need to let go of these fantasies because they are out of the norm and I don’t want to make any potential partners uncomfortable or push them away or ruin a perfectly good relationship just because I have these weird freaky sexual desires that aren’t seem as normal or moral

whatever I started ranting sorry about that, I wanted to say thank you again for the kind message and for caring enough to reach out in hopes of helping me, it means the world to me. I’m still unsure what exactly I want to do regarding my kinks, whether I want to keep fighting to find a relationship who is okay with them, which already seems impossible, or to just shun it all away in hopes of not pushing away a perfectly good partner. I wish I was easier on myself but unfortunately I can’t help but feel like an immoral scum of a human being by having these sexual fantasies. and because whenever I find anyone who IS actually also into these weird kinks, they more likely than not turn out to be a bad person. especially guys that I have met on here and have started a relationship with them. so I am worried that maybe normal, good people don’t have these kinks for a reason ? what if I’m a bad person too ? I don’t know it’s all messy and hard on my brain. it just feels hopeless finding a partner who shares my kinks/is willing to try them out and is not a bad person who only wants to use me/has ulterior predatory motives

[todayisawthewhxlewxrld]

"criminal intentions, she had Stolen Your Heart."

"i'd take a life for your love."

synopsis// when the tables turn and doma finds himself agreeing to worship you.

pairing// doma x gn!reader

word count// 2k

contents// angst? fluff? ooc doma probably (not even probably like i bet he is.. sad face), manga spoilers? but not important spoilers just his backstory, morally grey characters obviously....

notes// i need doma so bad you dont understand. and yes this is inspired by a song... todays inspiration is pineapple bride by anemoria... this shit kinda cringe ngl... i may be cringe but at least i am free. anywho yay! finally a demon slayer one shot!!

Doma lacked empathy; some could say he was just born without it, when in reality he was just never shown it. So how could Doma be expected to have something he was never given? at least that was until he met you.

For Doma, it had been another ordinary day—having people cry at his feet, worshipping a child like he was some kind of god as he gave them whatever advice his child brain could come up with. On the other hand, for you, it could also be said it was another ordinary day, but it was your new ordinary.

Just a few weeks prior, you had come home to find your family slaughtered—you obviously didn’t stick around, escaping to a nearby town only to find everyone there slaughtered as well. Since then, you’ve been mindlessly walking with no destination for the past few weeks, stealing things when needed, and somehow avoiding demons once night fell. But today was different; you could feel it, especially when you entered what you thought was an empty home only to find a boy staring at what you could only presume were his dead parents in a random room. He didn’t have a reaction, not even when you, a random child who seemed to have appeared out of nowhere, made yourself known to him.

“Oh my god?” You whisper breathlessly at the scene before you. You had seen countless people slaughtered, yet somehow you think this takes the cake in terms of gruesomeness.

“Couldn’t they have done this somewhere else? The blood is making the room stuffy,” Doma speaks blankly.

You weren’t phased by his apathy; obviously, he had to have gone through something to have made him this way in the first place. “You should go outside,” you say softly.

He looks at you curiously. “What?” 

Had you not already spent weeks on end finding slaughtered people and growing numb to death, you would not have offered what you’re about to offer at your young age: “I’ll clean this up, so it won’t be stuffy anymore.”

“What do you want?” he asks almost bitterly. “Are you going to cry at my feet for advice as well?”

You stare at him in bewilderment. “What? No, of course not. Why would I do that? I’m just trying to be nice.”

You almost miss how his face softens slightly. “Nice,” he mumbles to himself before offering his hand out to you, something he’d never dream of doing, but he supposes you could be an exception. “I’m Doma.” 

You take his hand hesitantly. “I’m Y/n.” 

From that day on, you and Doma had become inseparable. Where he went, you followed along, and where you went, he followed along. You considered him your best friend, and you liked to think he considered you his as well. Eventually, after spending so much time together, practically conjoined at the hip, it was only obvious that one of you was going to end up catching feelings, and you were the unfortunate one to do just that. You never dared to tell him, because although you were already special to Doma considering how he immediately befriended you and no one else, you weren’t going to try and push your luck out of fear that he’d end up seeing you as pitiful as the humans that worshipped him.

Then there had come a day where the two of you had run into someone who called himself Muzan, claiming he could grant Doma power and offering to turn him into a demon. Doma agreed in a heartbeat, but only if Muzan would turn you too, and you quickly agreed, even despite your past of seeing everyone slaughtered by demons, because you wanted a lifetime plus ten more with Doma. He was your best friend and the love of your life, so of course you would jump at this opportunity. After being turned, it seemed like you two were living your best lives together as upper moons, but that was quickly proven false when Doma started a new cult and you couldn’t stand it.

You couldn’t stand watching these women fawn over him only for him to eat them, and it’s not that you felt bad for them; it was that you felt jealous. So you pushed him away, and heartbreakingly to you, he didn’t make an effort to stop you, like he didn’t care, like you weren’t there for him since you two were kids, like he wasn’t about to beg Muzan to turn you had he said no. But what were you going to do? beg him so he could see you as just another who fawns over him? God no, you weren’t going to stoop to those pitiful humans level just for some impossible chance with Doma. and it was foolish of you to think that you were different from the start, that he would never do this to you, that this would never happen. but it did. So you left. or you tried.

Considering both of you were upper moons, whenever summoned, you were bound to run into him from time to time, and as much as you hated to admit it, even despite leaving him and going off on your own, you still loved him. and at first, whenever you would see him, you would have to stop yourself from practically jumping into his arms, but you learned to suppress that urge; you learned to keep your love for him locked away far beneath within your brain. Doma remained unaffected, at least at first. He had gotten so caught up in his little cult that he truly didn't even notice you left him for the first few months, but once he did, everything went to shit.

What Doma never cared to realize is that you were like air to him. extremely necessary but also extremely unnoticeable, so of course you don’t realize how much you need air until you're gasping for it, and that’s exactly what happened to him. He tried talking to you, but you kept your replies short, ending conversations just as quickly as he began them, and he didn’t understand. He didn’t understand what had happened; just months prior, you were practically glued to his hip, and now you’re reminding him too much of himself for his liking. He didn’t think you lacked complete empathy; he’s just beginning to think you're starting to lack empathy for him, which terrifies him.

Death doesn’t scare him, nor do some silly hashiras, but the idea of you treating him how he’s treated everyone else terrifies him. which is why he keeps trying to get your attention and keeps trying to make amends, and of course it doesn’t work because you’ve locked away any love you still have for him. Doma constantly found himself cursing his younger self for being so naive and not seeing how much you cared for him and how he cared for you just as much, if not more. It eventually all comes to a breaking point when you and Akaza have just come back from a mission, but only Akaza has walked through the doors and you are nowhere to be found. Doma immediately approaches Akaza, someone he considered to be his best friend (after you, of course), and annoys him about you.

Doma throws his arm over him. “I was super worried about you guys!” he says. “You’re my precious buddies; I don't want anyone here to wane out now!”

“Move your arm,” Akaza replies blankly.

He ignores his request. “Mind telling me where y/n is?”

Akaza ignores him and instead punches him, which of course doesn't phase Doma at all.

“Nice punch!” Doma compliments him as he wipes the blood off his face; his wound is already immediately healing itself. “So about Y/n?”

Akaza rolls his eyes and points toward the door. “Outside somewhere, can you leave me alone now?”

“Thank you, Akaza!” he beams before practically bolting out the door.

Doma quickly finds that you aren't out here, or at least not anywhere near, so he ventures out into the surrounding forest only to find you sitting under a tree. You lift your head at the sound of footsteps only to drop it again when you realize who it is.

“Go away, Doma,” you groan.

He perks up. “Glad to see you’re still alive!”

“What part of go away don't you understand?” You snap, glaring at him.

“Why do you hate me?”

“What?“ You laugh in disbelief because, in your mind, Doma didn't care, and you brushed off all his previous attempts to make amends as just something he did to ease the obvious tension between you two when in the same room and not because he actually cared.

Doma frowns. “I'm trying!”

You stare at him in complete bewilderment as you stand up and approach him, wanting to be face-to-face with him. In all honesty, you're partially trying to intimidate him to see if he’s bluffing, but you can’t see even a hint of insincerity in his face, and it makes your blood boil.

“For once?”

“Why are you acting like this? Why do you have to get so angry at me?”

“What? You mean acting like you?” you scoff. “I'm just playing a game you laid out for me, Doma.”

“I know,” he sighs in defeat. “So, Y/n, just tell me what I have to do to fix it... Please.”

You stare at him wide-eyed, your jaw clenched tight. You can't let him get to you, he's lying, he doesn't mean any of this.

Doma takes a step closer to you, your chests about to touch at this point. “Tell me, I’ll do it. I’ll do anything.”

“Yeah right.” You roll your eyes and scoff as you try to take a step back, but Doma grabs you by your arms and holds you in place.

“I’m serious.”

Your eyes bore into him intensely, taking his words as a challenge. “Fine. If you’re so serious, worship me for a change.”

You don’t say this with the intention of him taking you seriously; you don't think he actually will; you want to catch him bluffing; you don't want to think that maybe he does reciprocate your feelings and that he is actually really willing to do anything for you.

“Done,” Doma replies immediately as he drops to his knees in front of you faster than you can comprehend, he didn't even need to think about it.

“Doma-“

“What else?” he asks, looking up at you with a sickly sweet smile.

“Get up!” you say quickly, avoiding his unwavering gaze. The sight of him on his knees for you is proving to be too much.

“You wanted me to worship you; I'm doing it.”

You breathe out heavily, your body growing far too warm for comfort, and you’re sure if he stays there any longer you might actually start believing him and give into your love for him again. “I'm sure you do this with all of your little cult members. Now, get up.”

Doma grabs your hand, which catches your attention. You meet his gaze, which has still been on you this whole time, while he brings your hand up to his mouth and places a chaste kiss on it. “Don't be foolish; you’re the only one.”

You swallow harshly. There goes any resolve you had on not giving in to him. “Get up, Doma,” you say softly, not bothering to take your hand out of his.

He hums at your change of tone and listens, his hand still holding yours. “So?”

“So what?”

He smiles and gives your hand a slight squeeze. “Am I forgiven?”

“No, not yet," you sigh. "You still have to work for it. You took me for granted, Doma.”

He hums, and you expect him to frown or protest, but he doesn’t; he simply nods.

Doma places another chaste kiss against your hand as he mumbles,

"Like I said, I’ll do anything."

You attempt to hold back a smile but fail miserably.

"I like the sound of that."

©TODAYISAWTHEWHXLEWXRLD

[mybrainsrottingwithmcd]

hi!! so i’m. really really new to the aphmau fandom, aka i was super into it when i was like 8 and now my autistic ass got back into and actually joined in fandom stuff

i don’t. entirely understand how to guide through the aphmau fandom on tumblr. and i have a few questions- if you wouldn’t find can you answer them for me since you seem to be super into this!

what is an MCD rewrite and where do i find them- i assumed it’s people rewriting minecraft diaries but what sparked this and why?

what’s with the hate for aaron and aarmau- i don’t. fully understand it

how did garroth/lawrence happen (i love the idea)

is there like. a masterlist of aphmau lore somewhere so i can make sure i didn’t miss anything in my rewatch (i definitely missed stuff in my rewatch)

Hello hello!! Welcome to the fandom (we’re so sorry ur here its a mess)

I’d be happy to answer ur questions :D

“what is an MCD rewrite and where do i find them- i assumed it's people rewriting minecraft diaries but what sparked this and why?”

Yeah you’re right a MCD rewrite is people rewriting MCD and adding their own ships or improvements or different plot points. It started because the original MCD is kinda written poorly. Some plot points go nowhere, some parts are problematic, some parts drag on, characters appear and disappear, characters stopped developing and most importantly MCD has no ending and was abruptly discontinued by Jess so she could focus on Mystreet and other projects. People just wanna improve and finish the thing that means so mich to them basically. You can find them on AO3 and a few on Wattpad (I recommend AO3 tho its easier to find rewrites ur interested in cuz the tag system)

“what's with the hate for aaron and aarmau- i don't. fully understand it”

(There arent enough words in this world to explain my hatred for aarmau and aaron BUT)

Many reasons heres the main few: when Aaron was introduced he was supposed to be a side character but then he became a love interest kinda outta nowhere (my theory as to why is because Jess’s husband Jason voices him) and when he did become a love interest other characters like Laurence and Garroth kinda stopped developing and became worse to justify why Aaron was a good choice for Aphmau. For me they never had any chemistry in MCD, when its revealed Aphmau is pregnant with Aaron’s kid my brain logged out because wtffff how did they find the time and also why Aaron ://. He wasn’t kinda boring, his angsty past could’ve been used more but wasn’t he was just a brooding masked figure who followed Aphmau around. Then Pheonix Drop High happened and made things really weird. So when Aaron was 18 going on 19 he started dating Aphmau who was 14. Very creepy much yuck, they didn’t communicate well and then his whole character became that he’s in love with Aphmau but “he’s just not good enough for her :((“ and “i shouldn’t be with her shes perfect” and personally i find romance dramas infuriating, especially that kind of drama. AND YES AS A 18YR OLD U SHOULDNT BE DATING A 14YR OLD WELL DONE AARON. Mystreet they were the annoying lovey dovey couple with relationship drama they just rubbed me the wrong way in that series, I stopped watching after Emerald Secret and only recently forced myself to finish Mystreet and yeah no idc about them or their relationship. In MCD season 3 when Shad was introduced as a full character his whole thing is he’s Aaron again but evil and Aphmau’s sad about it and uuuuugg i dont caaareee. And I personally thought Aphmau wasn’t gunna end with anyone in MCD because she went on multiple rants about how that isn’t what she’s looking for and she has to think about her people first and she prefers her own company and then BOOM gets pregnant of masky mcsad face. Ugh. Basically Aaron ruined everything.

(Aroacemau truther 4 life aarmau hater 4 life)

“how did garroth/lawrence happen (i love the idea)”

Garrence has been a ship since the characters were introduced and quite simply its because they have more chemistry together than with Aphmau. I’ve always been a lil uncomfortable with how Jess wrote Laurence and Aphmau’s interactions and Garroth and Aphmau’s interactions but Garroth and Laurence interactions were just more natural they had more banter they were sweet together. Then Jess did a bunch of queerbaiting with it and the ship got bigger, so many fanarts so many fanfics. Then it just never happened because Jess is a coward. Like it would’ve been so nice to see the hints and chemistry go somewhere but it didn’t. Everyone still holds hope tho. With rewrites Garrence is Canon :))

“is there like. a masterlist of aphmau lore somewhere so i can make sure i didn't miss anything in my rewatch (i definitely missed stuff in my rewatch)”

i have no idea on that one, i’ve rewatched MCD every other week for the past 8 years (autism go brrrrr) i’ve never had to look for a masterlist of lore BUT I’m sure someone has to have compiled one somewhere either on the fandom wiki or on Tumblr somewhere. :))

ANYWAYS YEAH WELCOME TO HELL HAVE FUN HERE

[heretherebedork]

From the first moment i watched Kiseki i dont really feel like Chen is in love with the Boss. I dont get that vibe. I feel more like he is basically a father figure to him and Chen wants or needs to prove his worth to him (you know how asians parents-children are and all those filial piety shit lol). Especially in mafia world. On IG live when asked why CY try to force kiss AD the first time he said he feel like CY is the type of person that always needs to prove himself. The more u say he can't the more he wants to show you he can. That's why he is fixated on the Boss. Being chinese I guess I understand that. You always have to prove that you are worthy being loved or cared for sort if like am i worthy to be loved this much.. (i know it's sad) And yesterday in GTV bonus clip they were asked a question what attract him to AD he says AD is the type that "u beat/push him he wont run, you pull him he wont budge" and the rest they blip because spoiler .. my take on this is AD is his own person and he does something he does it completely. Unreserverdly. It overwhelms CY. Imagine that 4 years he beats himself thinking why... Do I deserve this kind of love from u? And he hints that hopefully there is going special ep about chenai where they talk about all of that...

Oh, yeah, his love for the Boss was always a kind of desperation. He loved what the Boss represented in his life and the safety and the strength that Chenyi wants so badly.

But romantic love? No. It's duty and filial piety and so many other feelings that he doesn't know how else to label. A lot of this definitely goes back to both of them and their childhoods and being rescued by the gang that brought them from danger and into safety or, well, as safe as a gang ever is.

Chenyi wants to prove that he's worthy of being rescued and the way that comes out and expresses itself for him is that mistaken love that makes him want to be found worthy, somehow, more worthy than anyone else because he needs to be found worthy and because it's the only way he can protect the other people in his life.

I think a lot about how much Chenyi wants to protect Ai Di and how much he sees Ai Di's lack of fear of death and willingness to die for him and how much Chenyi is torn between having Ai Di at his side and trying to keep him safe and getting him to consider a different life.

And then Ai Di chose to go to jail to protect both Chenyi and Zongyi. Ai Di chose jail because it was the only way to repay the two friends he had and the one person he loved so much he couldn't help but sacrifice for when faced with the choice.

Ai Di is his own person, stubborn and stiff necked and unwilling to bend because he is always convinced of his own correctness but also because he will not back down. Ai Di knows his own heart and he will not change.

And Chenyi loves that about him. He just didn't know how to balance protecting him and loving him. And now he's had four years without him to face that down and to realize that loving him is more important than protecting him but also that he has to have him in order to protect him and he wants to have him at this side.

I would love a special episode from Chenyi's POV because we need it and it would be great to see more of him and his love for Ai Di and how it changes and grew apart from him.

[comradeboyhalo]

Okay—you don’t have to answer if you don’t want to..! But I’m actually SO curious on your essay thoughts of q!Bad in 4halo fics. Because (I think) it’s kind of rare that q!Bad is depicted accurately in.. most qsmp ship fics. And I feel like q!Bad always becomes.. obsessed with romance with q!Forever in many 4halo fics?? Or super open + emotionally stable?? I don’t know how to explain it, but that’s why I’m curious of your thoughts (because I’ve read your fics and 100% trust your characterizations, especially of BBH cubitos <3)

hihi always down to ramble. and i agree, a lot of bad's flaws are smoothed over in 4halo fics, which makes him incredibly ooc. also, i dont think that these mischaracterizations are necessarily bad, i understand that in fluff fics (or angst fics, which im guilty of) sometimes theres no room in tone to fully capture all of q!bad's complexities. but that doesn't mean i cant have some gripes!

i dont think this is exclusive to 4halo, but 4halo is also bad's current biggest ship, so a lot of it just happens to fall on it. but i really hate how fanon!bad gets stripped down to a mere love interest who is just...very perfect in how he interacts with romance. he wants to go on cute dates, he confesses in a very sweet way. he is kind and nice and a little insecure, and is just so boring. its very much reminiscent of old skephalo fics, where bad is seen as "innocent" and then any other interesting trait of his gets stripped away. i also end up feeling im reading about a highschooler, when q!bad is 11k+ and cc!bad (obviously influential of his character) is in his late 20s.

again, i understand why people write 4halo on cute dates and first kisses. thats what fanfic is for! but i cant help but see the entirety of the ao3 page full of these very...allo-typical romance plots and think "...he would not fucking say that." q!bad is messy as fuck! if you don't interpret him as arospec, then hes at the very least repressed, and not in a cute YA romance way. a 1k fic of pining that ends in a nice love confession just doesnt convince me im sorry!

and then there's the blue diamond obstacle that gets in the way of 4halo monogamy....skeppy. again, i get why most 4halo shippers arent going to mention him, cause theyre just not into anything skephalo. i cant blame them for that. but im a master nitpicker, so ill still nitpick cause this is my blog. bad brushing over skeppy is ooc. bad acting as if skeppy is in the past is ooc. bad pursuing any form of relationship without including skeppy is ooc. bad choosing any other person but skeppy to be his #1 is ooc. and yeah it sucks for shipping if you dislike q!skephalo, but thats how it is and its not changing. and also any fics that push bad to "move on" from skeppy is just ??? not only is that his soulmate across lifetimes, but skeppy isnt dead? hes just not on the island? help??? bad has two hands, but one hand will always hold skeppy's and he's made that abundantly clear many times.

anyways im also not immune to q!bad butchering in 4halo fics! ill admit that, in writing the hanahaki au, i couldn't really find time to fit a lot of q!bad's humor into it, and he ended up more openly angsty and sad and vulnerable then he really is, or would ever be. so i totally get it, and im fine if other qbad viewers despise how he's written in it. however i will stand by the fact that q4halo would never pursue a traditional relationship together, and i chose the ending to be ambiguous because thats how i believe their relationship (and feelings) are: ambiguous. that's why, to me, 4halo is so good. i don't want to read about them confessing their feelings. i want to read about how their relationship is an undefined, confusing mess that will never be defined, and im just so surprised that there aren't more fics like that out there.

[sereniv]

@moonquakelake ill reply tomorrow but i definitely mean why do people hate jews so much, when did it start how did it spread. As in "how can people be like this/feel like this". im feeling emotional, it makes me sad and angery to think about. because i realized that i knew (and have seen) antisemitism exist, but why. i guess a broader question is how does that kind of thing happen. but ive gotten a few answers that answer my question now. i also want to be clear i never thought it was jewish peoples fault. just in case someone thinks im saying that

and i guess i should have been more clear but its not that i dont trust what jewish zionists say on being jewish. There are some zionists who answered the question and i knew they would, because im asking jewish people and i know jewish people know what they experience.

i have known about zionism for 20 years now, and on and off through the years have heard what zionists believe. not just non jewish zionists, but also jewish zionists. either straight from zionists as in i actually read what zionists believe right from their mouth, and i listen to anti zionist jews including those who were in the holocaust, israeli and not. i do listen to all sides even now, to ensure that yeah, the definition is the same, and i dont agree with the definition as it has been relayed to me. i agree with jewish safety, but i think the homeland is also palestinian homeland. i think it should be equal (to put it extremely simply).

and when ive actually listened, it always comes down to palestinians getting the short end of the stick. and this is also based off of a lot of things but some of the stuff sent to me by jewish zionists and jewish anti zionists alike, i already knew.

the reason i said no zionists, i was talking about any, jewish or not- because i dont want to interact with people that i have not once seen say that their ideology includes actual true coexistance. some say a 2 state solution, which has its issues. some like to focus on whats happening by focusing only on hamas. Where its obvious their care of palestinians is mostly just hate for hamas.

ill read what you wrote i just do not have the energy rn, but i want it to also be clear to everyone that i dont doubt anything a jewish zionist says about their experience as a jewish person, and i DO accept what theyve heard what their families and what not. I take in info, i look it up, cross reference, compare it to other people from opposing sides (anti zionists) compared to what i know about the genocide

But from experience, any time i ask what zionism is, it never ends in coexistance on the same land. neither now nor when talking about 1948 nakba. its always Jewish people deserve a homeland to be safe- and the details on how one gets that isnt important. but when pressed, its all hamas's fault.

So again, i didnt want to interact with zionists as a whole because i dont feel comfortable with the vast majority of what zionists stand for. Not the part about a jewish homeland, not about jewish people being safe, not about jewish people of any type being free to be jewish. im talking about what happens to Palestinians and what is happening and what has happened for years

I hear people say i dont know what zionism is but i am just going off of what zionists say and anti zionist israeli jews especially. i dont understand what they have to gain. They are iseaeli, they are jewish, and they go against the grain so much they are shunned. why would they do that?

im also going off what im seeing. jewish homeland doesnt mean kicking people who were already living on that land out. and that is what happened. and its not the jews who did it, it is israel. it is zionism. Judaism and Jewish people do not equal zionism. And this is just a fact seeing as there are non jewish zionists and there are anti zionist jews. of all kinds.

every place should be safe for jews. every place should be safe for palestinians.

this wasnt even supposed to be about palestine or zionism. this was supposed to be about hate against jewish people and conspiracies against jewish people from jewish people that i feel morals and views align with mine. that is why i said no zionists. its like saying no terfs when asking a question about women. It doesnt mean that i cant get valuable answers from a terf from their experience as a woman- i just dont want to interact with those type of people.

and i base that not on confirmation bias, but just what i have learned.

I am listening to jewish zionists on their experience and understanding of being jewish. seems they didnt listen but im not suprised. not bc zionism but bc thats the internet. and id listen to their definitions of zionism but all im getting is the same stuff i already know. except vague and no details on palestine.

im not going to respond to people who only want to talk about that but there are some who did just answer the question. idk if i should just delete the post. idk

[andy-wm]

Interesting question...what happens when/if Jikook finally reveal themselves as a couple/married? What will those obsessed people do? (The ones who are obsessed with proving they are a couple although they don't give a damn about them?) Are they capable of moving on to something else? Because then the mystery is gone and their reason for trying so damn hard to prove Jikook is a couple is gone - then what? What do people with that kind of mindset do after?

Don't you ever wonder?

Just to be clear, are you asking if i think about the obsessed jikookers who seem to be in it for their own gratification?

Short answer:

No, i dont really think about them.

I have had a few encounters with people who seem to think about nothing else. Although I try to avoid the sassaeng-level obsessed people, truthfully i can also be a little single minded... I'm ND and have trouble with moderation.

(I spent an inordinate amount of time during covid, watching grainy fancams from 2015, to fill a void in my life and a gap in my understanding of how their relationship developed)

But i know that being wholy consumed by any one thing is a little unhealthy, so for my own mental well-being I try to have some balance.

However, now i AM thinking about them now, so back to your question 😁

Will people who don't reallly care about jikook move on, if they don't have anything prove/fight for?

If they are the type to always go looking for something to brawl over, then i guess they will move on. And good riddance. Jikook doesn't need supporters who are only there to stir up drama.

I think there are also those agressive and obsessed jkkrs and tkkrs who would continue to throw poop at each other even if jikook livestreamed their wedding and had Tae as their best man. Those people may not really care about JM and JK in particular but they will NEVER GIVE UP on PRINCIPLE.

Jikook doesn't need supporters like that either, imo.

But what about those of us who do care about them and their happiness?

Will people who are obsessed with proving the relationship and who do genuinely care also move on?

These are the jkkrs who want to bask in the glow of true love, but also like to fight a good fight.

Will they lose interest if they don't have the obsessive need to prove the naysayers wrong?

My guess is no, because the joy of watching jikook together is euphoric in itself. Their obvious adoration and the care and dedication give us reasons too smile.

But they might miss the good ol' days of slapping back at tkkrs or high-fiving their jkkr friends when they cut down a toxic solo with a well timed caustic response. (That is kinda gratifying, let's be honest.) They might miss the detective work and in depth analysis of every bit of footage.

So maybe also yes. They might need a new adventure. I'm not saying they will stop caring about jikook, but i think they may seek out a new cause to fight for. As a side interest 😉.

Then again, if jikook DID come out, all hell would break loose. Jikook crusaders (said fondly) would have new banners to gather under because fires would be burning on every front. Many of us - even the quiet ones on the sidelines - would probably be fighting for them.

In fact if they did come out, i think (hope) those of us who have been interested but not entirely invested (and definitely not obsessed with proving anything) would rise up too.

Jikook don't really need us now, but they will need us if it ever happens. And i hope that we - the reservists let's call ourselves - will be prepared to fight. Just like JK was when Yoongi whacked that shuttlecock at JM.

As for me, I would stand shoulder to shoulder with all and any supporters to defend them. And I truly hope all armys, but especially the Jimin and Jungkook biased armys, would rally behind them under a rainbow flag. Because tkkrs arent the real enemy imo. They are just sad, angry people with no idea what true love looks like.

The real enemies are the bigots who hold power, and the institutionalised homophobia that threatens their safety, career and happiness.

And because that last paragraph was a bit of a downer, here are some things to warm your heart...

[devilbombers]

Hhhhiiiiii!!! This is the same anon from the yuri ask!!! 1st thank u soo much for answering my question 💕 & 2nd PLS DO GO OFF about how u feel negatively towards yuri PLSSSSSS!!! *clutches on to your shoulders like a mad man* it's not that I don't want to feel bored with yuri I genuinely WISH I could find a good yuri series but it's sooo hard & at some point u do get kind of tired of digging through all the other garbage yuri series that's out there & when u do find a good yuri series it's either some obscure yuri series that nobody's ever heard of that came out in the 90s/00s or the series got canceled due to poor sales/the publishing company just didn't give a fuck about it in the 1st place. Which is y it ALWAYS grinds my gears when I c ppl b like "would u himejoshis stop bitching because your yuri series aren't as popular as the BL/yaoi genre, y don't u just make your own yuri series/write your own yuri fanfics 🙄" like BRUH WHAT DO U THINK I'M TRYING TO DO?!?!? Sorry I actually have standards for the media I consume & not consume the same uke & seme toxic yaoi skinny twink series for the 500 millionth time in a row

I could cry over how much i understand you. (you are right and you should say that abt bl) this world is too cruel. Real Himejoshis like us need to stick together 🤝 i can send you all 5 series i can think of thats actually good if youd like.

tyvm for indulging my manic frusturations. This is certainly gonna be a long post saurrrr ill have to put it under a read more lmao. You asked for it so the gloves are completely off with this one and i thought abt it again and i actually dont care if anyone thinks im wrong.

I've come to the sad realization yuri can only REALLY be categorized like the following:

#1: yuri that is boring

unfortunately the usual case with 90% of yuri especially with new series

usually plays upon overused tropes making everything abt it lack any uniqueness to it

it is such an epidemic its forced himejoshis to become resigned to accepting these things into their hearts and even pretending its the shit when really its just shit 😭

its hard to give examples bc this makes up almost all yuri i can think of

#2: Non-Existent yuri

A series with really gay girls but they dont ever explicitly say theyre in love.

ex. dungeon meshi

Most himejoshis will on in the hill of saying they love subtext but we all know and especially themselves know that isnt true

#3: Yuri that is unserious as fuck

Theres a lot of drama yuri out there but it is always so fucking unserious it just ends up being funny as fuck instead

ex. Onii-Sama E and my girlfriend isnt here today

quite often this type is also associated with erotic media. But theyre so goddamn unserious it dosent matter how sexy either of them are, it immediately makes them so unsexy the minute they start talking.

i would only say ive succumbed to believe i love this genre bc i love to laugh at it sm

#4: Yuri where one or sometimes BOTH of them are dead 💀

i literally dont care i hate the "bury your gays" trope so much. it just aggravates the shit out of me bc what is even the point anymore then

great example of this is Alien stage

personally i feel like the only yuri that can exist like this and is actually genuinely good is obviously PMMM (i will fight everyone on the planet over this IDC)

#5: side character yuri

sort of a popular trend. kind of goes hand in hand with non-existent yuri but personally i think they count as different entities sometimes

extremely minor plot points or concurrent small interactions between side characters thats kind of gay as shit

theyre either EXTREMELY GAY or just a little gay theres no inbetween (either way, people will lie one way or another to say its really good)

despite the fact this yuri is quite ephemeral or absolutely nothing some ppl will still call this media wholly yuri for whatever maniacal reason

#6: YURI THATS TOO FUCKING SHORT

Unfortunately the best type of yuri also happens to be too goddamn short (usually limited to oneshots, anthologies, manga series no more than 25 chapters)

All my favorite yuri happens to be like this and i always scream at god for making life like this

If i hate anything in this world its liars, so i probably hate other himejoshis very much bc i keep constantly reading suggestions people hype up on the internet and ultimately being disappointed every single time because its never as good or unique as anyone says.

Its easy to say i hate them but its probably pity. I pity my fellow man that i consistently watch them fall for yuri underneath a wooden box held up with a stick and rope.

With all this being realized; its hard to ignore the truth of it all when trying to get into yuri regardless of it. So ive finally decided to stop listening to literally anyone anymore and ive ultimately stopped seeking it out bc im tired lmao

[myfairstarlight]

You have truly spoiled me today, gentle author, thank you so much for taking precious time to respond to my ask <3 You have put into words so many thoughts I've been having, jumbling around in my head, and much better than i ever could! I am grateful for you!

I agree with you on all counts, especially Colin's jealousy!! It's rather sad that it had to be relegated to the backburner in order to fit everything else, when them being writers was one of the ways they truly bonded in the book. And that Penelope was old hat and had something to teach him--as an accomplished writer herself-- which paralleled the fact that he could teach her about sexual intimacy, that was nice too.

If I may ramble some in your inbox a little longer, although I admittedly lean more towards enjoying the show than the books (not to say the books aren't also enjoyable, of course, its just a matter of preference), another thing that the books have over the show as a whole, in my humble opinion, is because they are so exclusively focused on their primary couple, we get so much more time and attention on them as both individual characters and a couple--apart, together, in a room full of people, just the two of them, etc.

The shows side plots can be a bit of a double-edged sword in that way. On one hand, it's nice to meet characters and see interactions we didnt have in the books--we got to know Penelope so much earlier as a result, for example, which I liked a lot. But, I feel some show subplots dont always make the most sense or are resolved in such a way that it's kind of like "what was the point?" As a result, we also lose time with our primary love match of the season, literally LOL

Both mediums certainly have their pros and cons, but I guess what I'm getting at overall is I'm so glad we get to have both ha!

Good night and sweet dreams, gentle author, thank you again for your kindness <3

Dearest anon, the pleasure has been mine!

What a lovely message to wake up to, thank you (let's ignore that I'm answering in the afternoon as I type this).

That is the main reason I always try to not compare books and show too much, or you just sign up for disappointment if you only care about the main couple.

I personally like that the show decided to make it an ensemble show, like you said it allowed us to be introduced to Penelope much earlier, and even other characters have already been introduced like Sir Philip who casual viewers won't think much of, but those who read the books get excited as they point to the screen. It allows us to see all the Bridgertons be a family as well, and see them grow and expand, as well as see new relationships the book would never explore (Penelope and Madame Delacroix come to mind, they were a delight this season! Gen is the only woman who understands what it means to have a business and not wanting to let it go, she is the only one who understands Penelope in that regard). Now the downside is that, with only 8 episodes per season, and such a large rooster of characters, there's only so much they can fit without things feeling overwhelming or rushed, and that's an issue all 3 seasons have in my opinion. I do feel like it could be easily fixed by having more episodes per season because it is clear they have a lot to tell, but oh well.

Bridgerton as a show is definitely more of a drama than a truly romance show in my eyes, especially with the way they used Lady Whistledown compared to the books where she did not have as much of a power, and with the addition of Queen Charlotte as a character. S3 challenged that a bit by introducing rom-com elements especially in part 1, but part 2 did show that it thrives with drama and tension as well. But the books are definitely a good addition for those who wish for more content focusing solely on the couples and their struggles. The show is adjacent-enough, but it took a lot of liberties. I suppose it depends on the individual to decide if that is a good or bad thing, personally, I like that it's so different (especially in how it portrays the men, actually, though I would still like to duel Show!Simon), you still get to be surprised, whether you start with the show or the book. I know people have been complaining about the lack of more polin scenes this season, but I fear that is just the standard Bridgerton formula, saphne and kanthony were not spared this issue either, and I fear the other couples will find the same fate. We can still complain though, we definitely did not need so many cuts back to Benedict having a threesome in e8.

Finally dear anon, if you ever wish to continue discussing even more on our mutual love for Colin and Penelope, know that my messages are open <3