#but also being gay has not being easy for that old man

[dodger-chan]

#google search "books for crotchety old women in their mid twenties who like murder mysteries and gay people"

And There He Kept Her by Joshua Moehling

Not exactly a mystery from the reader's perspective, more of a dark thriller (serial killer, missing girl, etc.) with mystery elements. The sequel is a much better mystery, but I think you need the character introductions from book one. There's a lot of small town drama and politics in both books, which to me is the more interesting part of the series. The main character/detective is the acting local sheriff (the election to get a permanent sheriff is a major plotline in book two) with a tragic past (a brother who went missing as a kid and a murdered boyfriend who he couldn't properly mourn because their relationship was secret)

Last Call at the Nightingale by Katherine Schellman

Period mystery set in New York in the roaring twenties. The mystery is really good and, as I recall, solvable for the reader. The main characters are really interesting people. There is a love triangle (our intrepid young seamstress/detective has feelings for both the mysterious nightclub owner and the semi-criminal fixer with police connections) but a well written one that mirrors the heroine's inner conflicts. I am very biased towards this series because it touches on so many of my interests.

The Maltese Falcon by Dashiell Hammett

One of the all-time classics. Fantastically written mystery. I'm not sure if the reader can actually solve it, but you do get all the same information the detective does, just not any of his reasoning. And you probably know who did it because it's a famous story. It was written in the twenties, though, so its queer villains are not exactly portrayed with modern sensibilities.

The Quaker by Liam McIlvanney

Another thriller, but one that leans more into the mystery aspect. Definitely on the darker side, with cops investigating a serial killer in 1969 Glasgow. To be honest I read this book when it first came out in 2018 and I don't remember why I liked it but I really did.

Proper English by K.J. Charles

Charles tends to write queer romance, but this one is also a murder mystery. It's been a while since I read this one, too, and the romance stuck with me more than the mystery, but as I recall it's one of those murders in an isolated country estate at a house party with a limited number of suspects, nearly all of which were being blackmailed by the victim. (If you're unfamiliar with the works of KJ Charles, they're a fun author. Their Sins of the City series is also kind of a mystery, though it takes a backseat to the love stories. And the Will Darling Adventures has kind of a spy thriller/mystery plotline, though again the romance is the main point; the spy stuff is what happens while the romance develops)

That's pretty much it for murder mysteries with canon queer detectives off the top of my head but Rex Stout's Nero Wolfe mysteries are fun and very readable (they were written over a long time span so the older ones use some very uncomfortable language). I'm a huge fan of Raymond Chandler, particularly The Big Sleep and The Long Goodbye (it's very easy to read Philip Marlowe as bi; The Long Goodbye is more about his relationship with Terry Lennox than it is about the murders). Hammett's The Thin Man is another really great mystery, and the main characters (married couple Nick and Nora Charles) are very sweet and in love.

Getting into reading in 2025 is a nightmare like why is everything divided into “cosy” or “spicy” and why are we describing protagonists and plots with fanfic tropes 🙃🙃

[spicyvampire]

He is a senior citizen, he is gay, he is homophobic, every twink in a 50km radius desire him carnally, I didn't say a name but a character immediately pop up in ur mind

[artuurle]

doodlepage and then a bunch of pre godhood lovestory. gramps keeps hanging on so he can get it.

[rmd-writes]

It’s the most ✨wonderful✨ time of year! AKA time for the annual RWRB Christmas fic exchange that I do with some friends every year. Would you believe that this is our fourth year doing this?

For the next 8 days, we’ll be posting a fic anonymously each day to the Don We Now (Even More) Gay Fanfiction collection on ao3. I’ll update this post with the links to each fic as they go up. The author reveals will be shared before New Year’s Eve ☺️

I’m so excited to see what everyone’s come up with!

Day 1: Home for the Holidays || M || 9.3k || a gift for @indomitable-love written by me, rmd

When Alex discovers that Henry's Christmas plans involve staying in their apartment alone, he does what any good roommate would do and drags Henry along to his family Christmas at the lake house. It's a win-win situation, since everything is better for Alex when Henry is around. Henry is his person. Completely fucking platonically, of course.

Day 2: Playing For The Other Team || E || 6.1k || a gift for @three-drink-amy written by @everwitch-magiks

Alex is the captain of his college lacrosse team. Henry captains the football team—or the soccer team, depending on who you ask. But if you think either team has their main rival within their own sport, you are very deeply wrong.

Or: two sports teams, both alike in dignity. In the Samson Memorial Stadium, where we lay our scene.

Day 3: The Thirteenth Duke || E || 10.7k || a gift for @villiageidiot written by @clottedcreamfudge

Alex is trying to find himself after his divorce, and Castle Llwynywermod seems like the perfect place to do it. Henry, the grumpy duke who owns the castle in question, strongly disagrees. This can only go well. (An 'A Castle for Christmas' movie fusion fic.)

Day 4: Ho for the Holidays || T || 6k || a gift for yours truly written by @villiageidiot

It sort of starts on New Year's Eve, although maybe it's actually Valentine's Day. But probably St. Patrick's Day. Well, whenever it starts, it ends on Christmas, but for good reason. Holiday hook-ups can only stay hook-ups for so long.

Day 5: Making a List, Checking it Twice || E || 18.6k || a gift for @athousandrooms & @dustratcentral written by @welcometololaland

When Alex lands a job house-sitting for an international man of mystery, he’s more than a little intrigued. According to Nora, the owner of the Brooklyn brownstone is a spy. According to June, he’s a prince. Alex is convinced his employer is a fifty-year-old man who loves tartan and ugly, porcelain homewares. Also, Alex might be flirting with his boss via a handwritten grocery list. Just a little bit.

Day 6: The Flight Before Christmas || M || 7.2k || a gift for @welcometololaland written by @indomitable-love

Alex loves his job. He gets to fly all over the world and see incredible places. It satisfies his restlessness and his need to always be on the move. But sometimes, Alex hates his job. Hates the passengers. One passenger in particular. --- or Alex is a flight attendant and Henry is his most-hated passenger.

Day 7: Baby, It’s Cold Inside || E || 12.6k || a gift for @clottedcreamfudge written by @three-drink-amy

Alex needs this trip. He needs it. Too many months have gone by since he and Henry were in the same place. It was so easy to get used to being in the same city. He feels like a different person than who he was the last time he saw Henry. Maybe that’s just because the last term felt like an eternity. As he looks at the map on the screen, the little plane icon gets closer and closer to England. If he shuts his eyes, he can feel Henry a bit more.

Day 8: I might just give you a chance (every-which way) || M || 8.4k || a gift for @everwitch-magiks written by @athousandrooms & @dustratcentral

Alex is on his holiday break, which is why he signs up to take on the bulk of helping his sister with her charity market stall. And while he does actually like the bustle and interactions with people that come with the job, he will admit only to himself that what he enjoys the most is antagonising his market nemesis, who, inexplicably with Alex’s ‘fuck you’ attitude, keeps coming around to make a daily purchase.

PS. If you're looking for more firstprince holiday fics you can find our earlier Christmas fic exchanges here: 2021, 2022 and 2023

cc: @welcometololaland @three-drink-amy @clottedcreamfudge @everwitch-magiks @athousandrooms

@indomitable-love @dustratcentral @villiageidiot

[xmalereader]

PS5 Peter Parker x Male Reader

☆ — MASTERLIST — ☆

REQUEST: May I request a PS5 Peter Parker x Male Reader. The reader and Peter used to be a thing when they were in high school but, they didn't work due to Peter's distance and cold because of him being spiderman especially when aunt May died. Years later, they encountered each other, the reader achieved his dream of being a writer, he wrote a book about him and unexpectedly, Peter came to his convention. Peter has been following the reader ever since they broke up, he always checks up on what he was doing daily without him. He visited the reader's convention hoping for a closure and confessed that he still loves the reader.

TAG: @jihanbang

WC: 4.7K

CONTENT/WARNINGS: Fluff, angst, mentions of high school sweethearts, age gap ( one year difference ), Peter is angsty, reader is a writer, break ups and make ups, request made, insomniac Peter Parker, Spider-Man, some mature language, memories, childhood, high school memories. Peter POV, OOC Peter Parker.

NOTES: I may have gone a little overboard with this one, but I don’t care. I’ve actually been planning on writing an angsty Peter about ex lovers and all and when I saw your request I just had to write it right away. I was gonna keep it short but instead took it further almost 5k! (°▽°), but anyways I enjoyed writing this and put it as Peter perspective. I hope you enjoy this shot because I know I did!

Peter stares at the poster board plastered on the front window of the cities famous bookstore that he’d been passing by on the way out of F.E.A.S.T. He wasn’t much of a reader when it came towards books of fantasy or romance and would much rather have his nose stuck between the pages of a physics and engineering book, but he’d for sure read this new one coming out soon. His eyes drift over to the authors picture, staring at the smiling man and taking in their appearance. How long has it been since he’s last seen that smile?

Peter remembers the first time he saw that smile.

He was sixteen years old and freshly new to high school near his aunt May’s place. He’d grown nervous and anxious at the idea of starting his first year of his last three years of education before collage could even start, he remembers arriving late on his first day, flustered and embarrassed when walking into his first period only to have everyone laugh at him when the teacher points out his tardiness to the whole class.

He was embarrassed, but also lucky enough to get a seat in the back of the classroom where no one would see him. The only difference was that the only spot avaliable was next to the schools president who was a year older than Peter and the only Junior in his first period class. Peter always steered away from class representatives having experience their egos back in middle school. The good thing was that he didn’t have to deal with it all day and only for the first hour of school.

Until he found out that the president was in all of his classes, meaning that he would be seeing the kid for the whole school year and being partnered with him in various projects together. When he was first partnered with the class president he figured that he would be the only one doing the project and getting them an easy A only to get the total opposite from him.

Peter was surprised when Y/n sat next to him during class, shoulders bumping as he opens their textbooks and began to plan out their project and what subject they should look into along with figuring out where to meet up and when to get started. Peter didn’t think that the class president would actually help him out or put the work into their project.

He figured that he was only being nice because he was the schools star until he started following Peter everywhere. He’d invite him to eat lunch together or even drag him to the library in order to get started on their project it wasn’t until Peter actually freaked out when Y/n followed him home, thinking that he was being stalked and gained the confidence to stick up to the president, glaring at the junior and asking him why he was following him and claiming him to be a stalker.

Only for Y/n to laugh at Peters accusations and quickly clear up the problem by telling him that he actually lived in the same street as him, pointing out to the house just a few blocks down from Peters aunts place. Lets just say that Peter was embarrassed that day.

It wasn’t until their time together became a routine.

Y/n would be waiting for Peter every morning in order to walk to school together, visiting his place and joining his and aunt Mays dinner nights and keeping them company. There time together almost everyday caused a strange feeling to bloom deep down inside of Peter, questioning himself as to why he was feeling this way whenever he was around Y/n.

Peter liked science and like a scientist he had to experiment.

So, the teen started the process. His mornings with Y/n on the way to school were normal the two always talking about class work that was left unfinished or Y/n telling Peter about the different ideas he had in mind for the students and making sure that the year ends perfectly for everyone. There lunch together was also normal with Peter sitting across from Y/n as he eats his chocolate pudding, staring at the other teen who also eats his lunch and passing Peter his own pudding cup.

Y/n knew that Peter liked the schools chocolate pudding and always gave him his each time they got it for lunch without even having to offer it and Peter would easily take it without hesitation and eat a spoonful while they continued to converse.

Peter didn’t get that familer feeling anymore and figured that he was possibly just sick that day. Only to get that same feeling again when their both sitting in his bedroom after finishing up their project with Y/n rambling to Peter about his writing and the amount of ideas he had in mind while showing his drafts, sitting so close to each other that they can feel each others breaths.

That’s when Peter discovered that he was crushing on the class president.

Which resulted into Peter screaming into his pillow that night after going to bed. He couldn’t be crushing on Y/n out of all people why him? Since his discovery he was much more careful around Y/n, cutting their time together, leaving earlier than him in the mornings to the point that he had to fake being sick in order to avoid seeing him.

It didn’t take long for Y/n to notice Peter avoiding him and he wasn’t one to let things drag on. The day that Peter arrived to school an hour early in order to avoid Y/n he didn’t expect himself to be grabbed by the back of his backpack and dragged inside the janitors closet. He panics at first until he’s face to face with Y/n, staring at him with wide eyes and noticed how angry he looked.

“You’re avoiding me.”

Peter chuckled nervously while shrugging. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Cut the crap, Peter.”

Peter can’t help but wince softly by his stern voice, avoiding eye contact when he feels his heart race, noticing how close Y/n is being while he continues to talk.

“You’re always leaving earlier than me in the mornings which is funny because your always waking up late and I have to be the one to wake you up—you stopped eating lunch with me and your always taking sick days which never happens because you hate missing school and you never get sick!” He continued to ramble on, losing Peter half way when he’s staring at him with admiration. The fact that Y/n not only noticed Peters avoidance but also pointed out the smallest things about him that not many people knew about, not even his aunt did.

“—and then you leave me behind after school when we always walk back home together and you don’t answer my texts! So, I figured that I’d corner you before school started in order to get answers.”

Peter is pulled from his thoughts and focused back on Y/n, staring at him as he stands before him with crossed arms and a frown on his face and a raised brow, waiting for an answer.

“It’s complicated.”

“Bullshit.”

Y/n was quick to respond, surprising Peter.

The two are staring each other down until Y/n sighs in defeat, frown softening while breaking contact and rubbing his temples. “Look, I won’t push you to tell me but can I least ask…did I do something to make you act this way?” His voice is filled with concern which only makes Peter quickly speak up. “No! No you didn’t do anything its…” He hesitates to speak, growing afraid and anxious by how Y/n will react when confessing his feelings.

He’s afraid to lose the person he really cares for, but he can’t always keep his feelings bottled up.

“Peter—?”

“I like you.”

Y/n’s breath hitched when hearing Peters confession, eyes full of surprise and with a gaped mouth. Before he could say anything Peter continues on. “I didn’t know until I started being around you more often and ever time I’m around you my hearts races and my stomach makes me feel like I want to throw up. I was avoiding you because I was afraid of how you’d react if you found out and I thought it would be better for me to keep my distance in hopes of getting rid of these feelings, but it only made me feel worse.”

Peter would think that Y/n would reject him and possibly leave him alone in the closet, ending their friendship after confessing. He didn’t think that he’d pulled into a kiss, warm hands cupping his cheeks and soft lips against his own. Peters eyes were wide in and face going red, he wasn’t only full of surprise but it was also his first kiss.

“You’re an idiot if you didn’t think i’d feel the same way.” Y/n says against Peters lips when breaking apart.

From that moment on the two started dating.

Peter expected the entire school to find out that their popular Vice president was dating him only to get nothing due to them keeping their relationship private. Y/n wanted to continue enjoying his time with Peter in school without being bombarded with questions by the various popular students who liked him. The two had their peace for the first year until graduation neared.

During Y/n’s last year of school he had told everyone that he wasn’t running for president for his Senior year and instead with the extra time he had he spent it at Peters place after school. The two would listen to each others talk passionately about what they loved with Peter talking fondly about his science projects and him listening to Y/n ramble on about his writing and his book ideas that he’s noted down for Peter to read and critique.

Everything was going well until it wasn’t.

Before Peter and Y/n officially started dating he focused on his duties as the cities hero, never having to worry about keeping it a secret from anyone else but his Aunt only to find out that he’d have to eventually tell Y/n about it which only freaked him out. He couldn’t allow him to know due to the fear of ruining their relationship and perhaps putting him in danger if things were to get bad as he continued to be the cities hero.

So, little by little Peter became distant towards Y/n.

Coming up with excuses as to why he didn’t want to go out to the point that arguments started over the smallest things. Peter wanted to keep Y/n close to him but the fear of being discovered as to why he’s always late to their small dates caused him to make the worst decision ever. It was the week before senior graduation that he broke up with Y/n, making up a lie that he didn’t want to hold him back when he’s in college and should have the freedom to be with other people who were far better than him.

Peter couldn’t even look him in the eyes when he utters those words and instead runs away like a coward.

That same night he had cried himself to sleep, feeling devastated and broken by his poor decision but also telling himself that it was for the best. Peter avoided Y/n on the days that he tried to talk to him, coming over to his aunts place to try and have a conversation only to be pushed away, keeping himself busy with his Spider-Man duties and spending more time in the city.

It wasn’t until after graduation that Y/n moves out of his parents place and got himself an apartment on the other side of the city, far away from Peter. He didn’t have to worry about going outside and bumping into his ex each time he checked the mail or took out the trash even though Peter wished to see him again he knew it’s was better to stay away.

Even after twelve years he couldn’t stop thinking about the man.

As the years went on he had found Y/n on social media, checking in on his profile every few weeks and taking notice of the various pictures that are posted along with interviews and conventions about his book that is to be released soon. Peter didn’t want to look like a stalker checking his ex’s socials, but can’t help himself and do it.

After returning back home from F.E.A.S.T he didn’t expect to find MJ working in the living room. Even though the two were close friends she had recently moved in with him as a way of saving some money and making living easier for the both of them.

“What are you doing?” Peter asked when enter the house and closing the door behind him while heading towards the kitchen to make himself something to eat while he listened to MJ type away on her computer. “Just on a new article.” She answers and looks up from her computer to see Peter searching the fridge. MJ took the opportunity to close her laptop and rush over to Peter with a smirk on his face.

“An article about what?” Peter closed the fridge after taking out the orange juice and slightly jolts by MJ’s sudden close appearance, startling him and sighing deeply.

“About Y/n.”

Peter froze at the familiar name.

Even though him and MJ had been friends for years he hadn’t told her or Harry about his past relationship with Y/n he never even mentioned dating someone when he was with them. He wasn’t ashamed he just didn’t want to bring up something he regrets ruining.

“The author?” He stutters out and focused back on pouring himself a drink and setting the carton of orange juice aside while he listened to MJ. “Yeah! I got to interview him about his book and he was very nice.” She went on about her time with Y/n. “Oh! He actually gave me a copy of his book before the release date and I took today to start reading it, I’m half way through but I really like it. I think its kind of cute that he turned his life story into a little fairy tale of his own.” She chuckled while approaching the living room where she picks up the book.

Peters eyes land on the cover page and watched her open the book to where she left off, his eyes averting as he focused on drinking his juice.

“Check this out! While I was reading it I noticed that the love interest has the same name as you.”

Peter chokes on his juice.

Spitting and coughing by the action.

“Are you okay?” MJ approached him, patting his back as she looks at him with worry only for Peter to reassure her that he’s fine and that he choked on his juice, claiming that he was drinking to face when in reality he was shocked by MJ’s words.

“Can I see?” He points towards the open book that she left open on the counter. “sure.” Her approval is all he needed for him to pick up the book and scan the pages, eyes moving back and forth as he read a few paragraphs and noticed how familiar the sounded to him. He doesn’t realize how engrossed he is that MJ clears her throat. “You can borrow it if you want, although you don’t look like the kind of guy who reads this sort of stuff.” She teased, earning a small laugh from Peter.

“You’d be surprised.” He gives off a faint smile, checks turning red as he closed the book. “Would it be alright for me to borrow it? I won’t move your bookmark.” He said.

MJ chuckled while nodding her head. “You can borrow it, just make sure to give it back once your done. I want to know what happens next.”

Peter promises MJ that he’ll return it once he’s finished.

He doesn’t read it right away and instead waits until sunset when he’s getting ready for bed, finally getting the peace and quiet that he needs before he takes the book from his nightstand and stares at the cover, growing nervous by the second until he finally decides to open the book.

Peter spends the entire night reading Y/n’s writing and realizing that his story is a reflection of their past relationship only with a few changes here and there, but it felt like Peter was watching a movie about his past and the things that both he and Y/n did together. He remembers the amount of drafts and ideas that Y/n wold show Peter and how he struggled to write a good story. He remembers Y/n telling him that he wanted a story that his readers would actually enjoy a story that will pull them in to the point where they are begging for more.

The story is written in Y/n’s perspective, obviously using a different name for the character he’s writing about. It’s the way that the words are perfectly written for him to understand and remember those days of them being together. It all came crawling back to him as he nears the end only to find out that the ending was different.

Instead of both characters breaking up the story continues on with Y/n’s perspective of his life in college, not giving much detail about what happened to the relationship and ending with him finding joy in writing. Which leaves Peter questioning himself, why?

When he completes the book he sets it aside sitting in silence and thinking about everything that happened between the two. He thinks about the first time they kisses, their first date, the first time that Y/n convinced Peter to sneak out to a party, the time that Y/n snuck inside Peters bedroom window as the two snuck around like teenagers would.

He also thinks about their break up and how scared he was to even look at Y/n when ending it between the two.

It was obvious that he still loved him and after twelve years he couldn’t let go.

—

Peter shouldn’t be here.

He shouldn’t be at this convention when he clearly told himself that he’d keep his distance and yet, here he stands in a line full of fans that came to see Y/n and get their books signed. His hand gripped a copy of the book, growing anxious each time the line got closer only to chicken out every time he gets close and head back to the end of the line.

His anxiety washed away every time he got to the back of the line and did this almost five times until the line was cut short when announced that this was Y/n’s hour before leaving, meaning that Peter couldn’t turn back nor could he avoid confrontation. His heart raced as the line moved closer, keeping his head down in hopes of avoiding getting attention. He found out that he was the last one in line which would make the whole situation less awkward between the two.

He wouldn’t be holding anyone back and could leave whenever he can without a problem.

That was until his turn came up.

After the young girl in front of him gets her book signed and goes along her day he noticed Y/n turning around in order to get another marker due to the last one running out of ink, not noticing Peter when he approached the table. He slides the book in front of Y/n and when he turns back around his focus is on the book first, smiling as he flips it open.

“Sorry about that my last maker ran out and had to get a new one! But, good thing your the last I’m in no rush!” He chuckled out, being friendly as always as he flips to the front page where he signs his name. “who am I signing this for?”

Peter hesitates.

“Peter Parker.”

He noticed Y/n freeze mid signature, looking up slowly to face Peter.

After twelve years Y/n hadn’t changed a bit, his hair was still the same and so was his sense of fashion, remembering when he was teased for wearing a coat the minute fall started even though it wasn’t even cold outside yet.

The two stare at each other in silence only for Peter to break the tension between them. “I liked your book.”

Y/n blinks at him, focusing back on the book and clearing his throat while he nods. “Thanks…” He finished signing the book and closed the cover, sliding the book back to Peter while avoiding eye contact.

Peter wanted to wince, but it was expected. He ended things terribly between them and didn’t blame Y/n for avoiding him. As he reached out to take the book back into his hand he lets his fingers trace over the binding the tension between them growing even more as they remain silent amongst themselves.

“Why did you end it like that?”

Peters question gets Y/n’s attention, finally looking at him with a confused look. “What?”

“The story, why did you end it like that?”

Y/n licks his lips. “Because I thought it fit well.”

“Even when you know what the ending was really like?”

Peter wasn’t trying to judge his writing or criticize the ending, he was simply confused as to why he ended it when him sounding like everything was fine when in reality the ending would have been different if he had added their break up into it.

Y/n doesn’t know what to say, remaining silent as he stands from his seat and tried to keep himself distracted by cleaning up his area and pouting things away. “Why does it matter?”

“Because I know what its really about.” Peter speaks up, taking a step forward and setting the book down on the table as he watched Y/n collect his things. “You’ve showed me your writing before and I know how much you like being honest in your stories—“

“Not everything has to be true.” Y/n blurts out getting Peters attention who gets cut off mid conversation while looking at the man that he knew loved to write stories with passion who’d quickly pull out his phone the minute an idea came to minute and would note it down for later.

“What do you mean?”

His question causes Y/n to really look at him. “Yes, the story is about us and yes I changed the ending, but that doesn’t mean that everything is true. If you want the truth then I am more than happy to tell you the truth.” He glares at Peter while shoving his jacket inside his bag. “The truth is that I was miserable in college, I hated that place and the people who were there with me. I didn’t care for anyone and I stopped writing for years because every time I sit down and pick up a pen and start writing I can’t help but think about you all the time and that stupid smile on your face. I found it hard to visit my family knowing that you lived just a few blocks down.”

Peters heart races when listening to his explanation.

“So I figured, why not write our story the way I always thought it would be like?”

By the time he was done talking he had finished getting his things, giving peter one last look before leaving, brushing past Peter and making his way towards the exit while Peter stood back and watched. He felt like he was losing him all over again telling himself that it wasn’t worth it and to move on like he has been in the last twelve years, but after reading his book after getting the truth as to why he wrote it he knows he can’t sit back this time and watch as the person he still loves slip away from him.

So, Peter is quick to react. He’s rushing after Y/n and running out of the bookstore, looking both ways until his eyes land on Y/n who walked further up ahead. He’s running after him, chasing down the man and grabbing him by the arm and he pulls him into an alley way, perhaps not the best place but the only one that can give them some privacy from the public eye.

“what are you—!?”

“I’m sorry.” Peter cuts in.

“Peter—“

“No, let me finish.” He cuts in again, this time letting go of Y/n’s arm. “I’m tired of running and I’m tired of letting the best thing get away from me. I know what I did to you was horrible and it was the most dick thing I could ever to do and yes, you should be mad at me and you should hate me for it, but I never stopped thinking about it. You have no idea how many times I wanted to reach out and apologize but every time I thought about it I couldn't help but think about how I ended things and I regret everything about it.”

Y/n sighs softly, eyes softening as he leans back against the wall. “Then answer me this, why did you end things?”

Peter froze, the familiar fear crawling back to him.

“Because I.,,” He couldn’t speak. “Because I was afraid to lose you if I told you the truth. I was afraid that you’d possibly stop liking me or end things with me first before anything else.” He was rambling at this point knowing that he wasn’t telling him everything and was still avoiding the truth.

“Peter,” Y/n’s voice is enough to bring him back. “The truth, now.” His tone grew stern, glaring this time.

Peter sighs in defeat. “I didn’t break up with you because of you going to college, I broke up with you because I was afraid of telling you that I’m Spider-Man…” He finally says the words, finally revealing the truth. He expects Y/n to laugh at him or perhaps walk away without a word only to hear the most jaw dropping thing ever.

“I knew.”

‘you knew—how?”

Y/n laughed at Peters shock. “Peter I was always paying attention. I knew that something wasn’t right when you grew distant with me and I didn’t realize until I found your suit hidden under your bed. I didn’t want to believe that my boyfriend was Spider-Man until I started piecing everything together.” He explains to Peter. “You were always late to our dates, ditching classes which you never do, I even noticed the amount of muscles you gained when we were in gym together.”

Peter blushed at the last statement not realizing how much Y/n stared at him each time he changed in front of him.

“If you knew why didn’t you tell me?”

“I didn’t want to freak you out and instead I decided to wait until you were ready to tell me��and this is the results.” He points a finger between the two, realizing that this all caused them to break up even when he already knew. Peter felt even worse now that he knew the truth, wanting to punch himself and feeling ashamed of himself.

While Peter cursed at himself for everything, Y/n speaks up with a small smile on his face. “So you thought about me?” Peter blushed at his comment. “Yeah.” He answers honestly, staring at the man who chuckled. “You wrote a book about me.”

“Technically it wasn’t about you it was about us.”

“Still counts,”

Y/n can only laugh which makes Peter smile feeling like teenagers again. Their laughter and smiles bring them back memories of their time together and perhaps they can make new ones

[absolutebl]

This Week in BL - I hand out a couple of high scores & have qualms about pairs

Organized, in each category, with ones I'm enjoying most at the top. I didn't get many screen shots this week, so welcome to a WALL OF TEXT. Duh duh duh dum.

July 2024 Week 3

Ongoing Series - Thai

We Are Cute (Weds iQIYI) ep 16 fin - TanFang are ridiculous but I have grown to truly love them. ChainPun at the end made me hoot with laughter everyone was a meme of FINALLY. In fact, I loved all the pairs, this was a great ensemble piece.

I was left mildly wondering if Arm will ever lead a BL. 

All in all? 

I really enjoyed this show. It was slow to find its stride (I didn’t get into it until ep 7) but I’m very glad I gave it a chance. It’s a soft ensemble piece with multiple couples and very little plot, but I didn’t care because it’s not trying to be anything more substantial. Essentially this was a series of vignettes covering one year of uni for a queer friendship group finding love, new friends, and laughter. It’s not being harsh with us or it’s characters the way some offerings of this ilk have been (side eyes Friend Zone and Only Friends) nor did it tumble into Gen Y chaos. In fact, this reminded me more than anything of a refined and elevated Love Sick - just with older characters and occurring within a genre that has matured too. It has that close queer friendship group meets earnest gentleness that made me adore Love Sick so much. In other words, this was Thai BL at its finest, finding it roots again 10 years on, but also stretching upwards and showing us what it could do with that original seed. So? I loved it. Did it blow my mind? No. But it left me smiling and made me belly laugh quite a bit. 9/10

Technically it should probably get an 8/10 - too much singing, but I’m bubbling over with nostalgia rn.

Wandee Goodday (Sat YT) ep 12 fin - I struggled to watch that fight. But that’s because it was so well done for a BL. Lots of speeches this ep. (I said too cheesy right before Dee did.)

I like Drake & Title as a new ship. Hope it sails. Also some decent ace rep. 

On a totally different note: Good use of frosting. But… you know I’m gonna say it… NO SINGING. 

Final thoughts:

What a FUN show. A charming quintessentially modern Thai BL about a doctor and a boxer who start as a one night stand and then fall in love. Great rep for everything from Muay Thai, to safe sex, to FUN sex, to ace, to bisexuality, to smiley kisses, to the first legal gay wedding in a Thai BL. It’s a delight and I enjoyed (almost) every single moment of it. 

An easy 9/10. 

I do hope we get more GreatInn.

The Rebound (Weds Gaga) eps 7-8 of 12 - So Ryu’s ma is evil? And Frank is giving me serious second lead syndrome. Also he’s been working out a lot. I noticed my dude, thank you. I don't think we've ever gotten this kind of focus on a side dish before. The show is in dangerous territory, since he's so good he's taking attention away from the leads. Also, I think Zen is completely aware of what is going on with this love triangle, he just doesn’t want to put up with their nonsense. I even like the cute side crumbs. 

On a complete aside: why are crime lords in BL always in bathtubs? Asking for… the other genres. Wouldn’t it be hilarious if The Godfather entirely took place in bathtubs? A Real Man has a large… tub. 

And we end with mass murder? WOW! Chaotically played my dearest pulp! 

Century of Love (Weds Gaga) eps 3-4 of 10 - These boys are playing complicated roles with lots of layers to them. Daou is doing a great job. We can see the old man inside this kid. Offroad... I’m not convinced, he’s chewing the scenery a bit. I actually think he has the more layered and complicated part to play. So I'm giving him a chance to subtly show that cheerful façade fracturing with delicacy. But I worry we may be back in JamFilm territory where one partner can’t quite keep up with the other's skillz.

All of this is to say, this is still a better acted piece than I was expecting. (Although the surrounding cast and special effects are doing our leads no particular favors.)

It’s hugely enjoyable but uneven (with those occasional injections of slapstick humor) I’m not entirely sure the production knows what it wants to be. I wish it had the courage of its convictions to lean into the “I feel you linger in the air” aesthetic. Now that I know Thailand can go there, I’m a bit annoyed when a show like this, which should, doesn’t. Which is not to say I’m not enjoying it. I am. A lot. Just that I should probably lower my expectations. Daou, however, is so damn good, he keeps getting my hopes up.

This Love Doesn't Have Long Beans (Fri iQIYI) ep 3 of 8 - Oh no we have a lonely poor little rich boy. Catnip character for @heretherebedork. Meanwhile, I’m liking the layers of the main romance, with everybody having hidden agendas and such. Nice tension. Of course I love the eroticism around smells. One of my favorite tropes. But I’m not sure I buy the relationship chemistry between the leads when this much lying is going on. 

My Love Mix-Up Th (Fri YT) ep 7 of 12 - I am growing to love Fourth's version of this character. He’s so frantic and confused, but in a completely different way from the JBL. It’s a bit more whiny and a bit less cartoonish. But it resonates with me more. He's less of a meme tho. The photo moment! I literally squealed, "Gah!!! They are so cute!"

Linguistic moment. Did you hear in the cupcake section that Half went to rao/ter? Very sweet. (The boys use rao/nai.)

Also, yay for the twist on the school counselor character! Best thing ever. I would like the entire story of Nop & Sin GMMTV, please and thank you. Also… NO SINGING. 

Sunset X Vibes (Sat iQIYI) ep 6 of 12 - I’m continuing to enjoy this a lot. It’s a fun cast. A touch twee for me, and I’m really hoping they amp up something other than the romance soon, but I don't mind ending my week with these two.

The Trainee (Sun YouTube) ep 3 of 12 - I'm enjoying this show so much, just not as a BL (yet). It’s honest to the internship experience of overwhelm (such as I recall, it's been A WHILE). I’m not sure how much BL I’m getting from it thus far. I mean our leads shared a long glance or two but that’s about it. It’s very slow burn. But I don’t mind that since I’m liking the surrounding stuff. Can't stand the girlfriend intern character tho. I hope she get redeemed.  Or killed.

Love Sea (Sun iQIYI) ep 6 of 10 - Halfway through I had already finished my drink out of sheer boredom.  Trash watch here.

Knock Knock Boys (Thurs Gaga) ep 9 of 12 - Frankly I’m finding this relatively dull right now. Lovely kisses tho. Best and Seng are great together, consummate BL pros, not a pair I had on my bingo card. 

Ongoing Series - Not Thai

I Hear the Sunspot AKA Hidamari ga Kikoeru (Japan Weds Gaga) ep 5 of 10 - I like how much we can see K’s intense liking and emotional need for this loud broken kid. And how easy it is for him to admit to that truth. Because what he’s going through is so much worse than admitting to having feelings. The acting is fantastic. Sometimes I forget how great Japan can be. And then they decide to remind me. Oh, it’s SO GOOD. 

Takara's Treasure AKA Takara No Vidro (Japan Mon Gaga) ep 3 of 10 - Another one I’m finding boring. Just japan’s version. The vintage yaoi “old dude creep trope” I see. It’s been a while. 

It's airing but...

Meet You at the Blossom - it's your funeral (or, more likely, one of the main characters'). You can argue but... statistics. You know my feelings on this matter. MY BLOG, remember?

GIF by mypotatokun

In case you missed it

The Time of Fever AKA Unintentional Love Story 2 (Korea movie) trailer released to Korean theaters 5/25. HoTae & DongHee, side couple from Unintentional Love Story are back! Same actors, same character names. I love them. Devastated this hasn't had international distribution. I demand you tell me the moment you find it!

The Last Time (Thai Fri YT) - Got bumped to Aug 2. Convoluted story of loss and possible reincarnation or something.

Next Week Looks Like This:

Upcoming BLs for 2024 are listed here. This list is not kept updated, so please leave a comment if you know something new or RP with additions.

July Releases Still To Come

7/24 I Saw You in My Dream (Thai Weds Gaga) - Dee Hup is behind this one so I have high hopes. Younger boy chronically teased his whole life by the older boy next door suddenly starts having horrific prophetic dreams about his bully and must save him.

7/26 4 Minutes (Thai Netflix or iQIYI?) - Great, a rich boy studying business at uni, suddenly gains the supernatural power to see four minutes into the future.

7/29 Battle of the Writers (Thai ????) - trailer here, TutorYim return, and while I adore them, I really hope this is better than Middleman's Love. Won't be hard. However: the premise? Ugh. Something something authors fighting - save me. Why don't writers understand that nothing is more boring than writers?

THIS WEEK’S BEST MOMENTS

No time this week, I'm having computer issues.

(Last week)

Streaming services are listed by how I (usually) watch, which is with a USA based IP, and often offset by a day because time zones are a pain.

The tag BLigade: @doorajar @solitaryandwandering @my-rose-tinted-glasses @babymbbatinygirl @babymbbatinygirl @isisanna-blog @mmastertheone @pickletrip @aliceisathome @urikawa-miyuki @tokillamonger @sunflower-positiiivity @rocketturtle4 @blglplus @anythinggoesintheshire @everlightly @renafire @mestizashinrin @bl-bam-beyond @small-dark-and-delicious @saezurumurmurs

Sigh, Tumblr in it's infinite wisdom doesn't like too many tags.

There's these tricks, remember.

[etoile-star]

My main struggles with the percy jackson fandom, but its an ADHD rant, that ended up being wayyyy longer than i meant it too.

I can't wait for them to do a heroes of olympus show (I hope so), and most of these leo girls are so surprised when he isn't this super hot, conventionally attractive guy, because in the book he isn't supposed to be conventionally attractive. He's supposed to be kinda ugly, that's one of the reasons he's so jealous of Jason.

It's one of the things that frustrates me most about the percy jackson fandom, is some of the erasure that goes on, in lots of characters. I mean so many. Not only Leo, but also Nico, Piper, Hazel, and Frank. People think of these characters in such ways that are so base level.

There are probably many others, that is just off the top of my head. Now there is things that are understandable, like how Hazel is just a cutie pie, but even then, I feel like people erase how truly powerful she is.

Also, minus nico, this happens mostly to the characters that are people of color, and I'm white, so I don't want to speak to much on something I don't understand. But it is something that happens very much, is that people see these characters as what they are on a base level, but not on a deeper level. Whether that is Piper and how she is barely brought up to be Native American anymore, and Rick Riordan hasn't done this, but I feel like this fandom has majorly white washed her. This has also happened with Frank, who, yes, in the book he does say many times "I'm from Canada, I'm not really Chinese" but thay doesn't mean as a fandom we erase that from him entirely.

This also happens with LGBTQ+ characters, I STILL find people writing nico di angelo x FEMALE readers. Which is unexeptable and not okay. That man has been out as gay for 10 YEARS, and people are erasing that as such a huge part of his character. What is wrong with u, there is a whole chapter that made me SOB as a 13 year old, that you people are not going to take away from me. Especially from someone who was outed.

Also, there are so many fanfictions I read where I feel like everyone's ADHD is just gone, like not there at all. What happened to that? That's such a huge part of how people discovered they were demigods. That's coming from someone who struggles from ADHD, also, if you don't know how to write it, do research, Google is free, and easy to use, and there is many good resources for ADHD research.

So, yeah, as a whole for such a wildly inclusive book series, that I love so much, I feel like this fandom needs to work on the erasure of minorities, as a whole.

[tocomplainfriend]

It feels less like you want to address a real life problem to characters, but more like you want to have another of your characters you constantly baby and want others to fangirl over.

TW: Rape, SA, Racism, Stereotyping, Homophobia, Acephobia, Arophobia.

The representations of topics in media DOES affect real people.

Fiction can affect reality.

Let's start easy, Jaws. This goes back to Hazbin I promise.

"Since the release of Jaws in 1975, the world has witnessed a staggering decline of 71% in shark and ray populations, and around 100 million sharks are killed each year." (including multiple practices of mass hunting sharks in competition)

Both Steven Spielberg and the original writer Peter Benchley regret the movie and book. It's a big reason of the shark treatment, when it started by old fishermen worrying about shark biting people in the beaches they made money of.

Even if you aren't a shark killer yourself, a lot of things you believe of sharks are untrue myths that come from making sharks "evil" human killer animals. Sharks cannot smell blood from miles away, that's not even how water works, the particles of blood need to enter their nostrils. Sharks are not man eaters, they attack other prey animals before human. Shark attacks are extremely rare, even if they happen they are not justifiable to kill all sharks.

Sharks actually have personalities they can fit in, they are smart and recognize people and boats- and form positive relationships with people. They can even like getting pet by people.

Other level to represent other thing sin media that affects reality we can address Queer, representation as a topic.

I hope it is not a surprise for you... possible non-straight, non-cis person reading this. That the constant representation of gay man as kid predator is a problem. They used old commercial (PSA) to spread negative views of gay man. Media is used to spread messages and affect its viewer. This is, there are cartoons created by Jehovah witness (or similar religions) to spread their beliefs and teach to their children in an easy, digestible way.

Same with the amount of straight woman that went off to read shitty yaoi manga and fetishy gay wattpad stories, and went to sexualize and diminish queer men. Constantly making gay man's personality into bottom or top (uke and seme shit). I witness this irl, others have too.

Same with shitty men that view Lesbians as a porn machine for men, cause "monkey brain like woman, lesbian = two women". Which happens in general and adult media. All of these are EASY examples.

Another one which turns out many people don't think about. Having your representation of an AroAce character (on purpose or not) be the psychopath with no feelings. Associating the not being romantically or sexually to means you have no heart, to be abnormal, by then a psychopath. An abuse or serial killer.

Fiction does affect reality-

A racist film, 'Birth of the nation' Revived the KKK and let to all the discrimination, and the homicide of black people of centuries ahead.

-

Coming back around, how you treat the topic of SA, and r-pe- affects the real world. You would think someone who wrote that, had in mind on how that affects people in real life. Didn't you want to represent victims of SA/R-pe that are sex workers and male?

Reducing the r-pist, pimp, trafficker character to an air head to treat as silly is crazy to do. Specially as... oh idk... the creator? Both this and the tweet of the voice actor calling Val "Bubbles Coded" is so crazy. The character is also not deep enough by itself, it's pretty much Stupid and a R-pist sex trafficker. The tweet below Viv's fucking kills me too.

The fact Val is shown to be air head stupid doesn't delete he backed Angel (and by being a sex trafficker and a pimp, and him licking charlie that means he has multiple victims) into a corner and under his control. Too then abuse of him in many different ways. Manipulations are not only done by Super mastermind people, and representing it in such way diminished, affects people who have being manipulated and actually try to question if they have being or not. Manipulators can be normal, average people, they usually are not obvious. Even if Val is openly a shitty person that's really obvious, it doesn't detract from him being manipulative to people. The scene where Val threatens him in chains that is manipulation, his text messages are manipulation (even if you think it is too obvious to be successful).

How you represent SA/R-PE, and its perpetrators, do affect real life.

Going around and having your "serious R-pe episode", to then go in other episodes or the other series you are writing to make r-pe/sa jokes is terrible. For the person that directed the whole scene of poison to NOT be r-pe/sa victim (said by themselves) with a r-pe fetish with this character's in specific, to directed in the most graphic way possible is awful. To go around babying your r-pist character is crazy.

Hope you understand that this doesn't mean not treating any topic at all. Creators should be awere on how they treat topics and the scenarios they create with them, too. People and viewers need to also put their brain to understand the media they consume. But you can't always put all blame only on the viewers of a series, if media is messy is a fault of the media. You can criticize both.

You need to acknowledge Valentino is indeed a terrible person, You don't need to delete his actions or the weight of them.

I also just know that a lot of Val fans just like him to draw him in r-pe art and get their fetishized gay ship. Cause that's what they are into. You won't even do that with a woman, because you are into your fucked up fetishized gay porn from wattpad you never left behind.

If you like him, FUCK IT, just please take his abuse seriously. Don't default your entire usage, and view of the character to be 'uwufied' fandom stuff, please.

I hate how the topic has being treated, in and out of the show. I'm a victim, and I'm hurt by how these things are treated and knowing how it affects others. Even in things I haven't watched! Don't make the argument don't like it? Just don't watch it. The movies from the video of SA of men being a joke, many I haven't watch- that still affects over all. It's still a problem and it's disheartening.

Also have this:

[theshoesofatiredman]

rant: i feel like the ‘nice’ christians are worse than the outright hateful ones. the blonde peppy girls with john 3:16 in their instagram bio that are like “i don’t hate lgbt people!! i just disagree with their lifestyle. love the sinner hate the sin <3” LIKE GIRL STFU. it makes no sense to say this. i’d literally prefer for an old person to just call us abominations or degenerates.

the best analogy i can think of is, let’s say having red hair was a sin. so, as a redheaded person, you being born that way isn’t necessarily a sin. you’re still loved by god! but…since you grow out red hair you have to keep it continually shaved. again, there’s nothing wrong with having the red hair gene!! but it’s just a sin for it to start growing :)

that’s how dumb these mfs sound who say gay ppl have to be celibate for life. i cant stand it at all. even worse, homosexuality is grouped in with sins like murder, adultery, etc. wtf!!! one time i was reading a christian book and the writer was like “There are so many problems with our world. Misogyny, trafficking, abuse, pedophilia, r*pe, homosexuality”….ONE OF THESE THINGS IS NOT LIKE THE OTHERS. how do they not see that?

I'm not sure if you want me to answer your last question, because on one hand, it seems rhetorical. But I do have theories!

For starters, they can't see how unlike the others is because they were conditioned against it by their religion. Many are so indoctrinated with the idea that all sin is hated equally by God, so when considering lists like this, they are not considering impact or harm. Theirs is not an ethic based on harmful outcomes. It's one God's opinion over everyone else's. To justify it, their theology makes God to be the ultimate good so a relationship with him is the ultimate good. And anything God calls sin alienates us from him and is therefore harmful to us because it deprives us of the ultimate good. But you have to bring it back to: well what does God actually think is harmful about gay love? They have answers to that question but they aren't good ones.

Second, it's easy to not recognize the wrongness of homosexuality's inclusion on this list because most people aren't gay. It's easier to miss what you've never experienced. It's also easier to hold people morally responsible for a choice you'll never have to make. A straight man who never lusts after a man is without the specific sin and he is able to cast the first stone far more easily.

Third, and in a similar vein to the above, it's really easily to moralize based on disgust. If something seems gross, it is so much easier to think there's something wrong with it. Unfortunately, sex that people don't want to have often seems disgusting. If you're straight, the idea of participating in gay sex is probably not going to feel good and it is so so easy for that disgust to be moralized against gay sex havers. It's so important to not let disgust drive your morals but many people miss this.

Fourth, homosexuality has been falsely equivocated with all of those other things. The idea that LGBTQ people are rapists, pedophiles, abusers, and/or child traffickers is a prevalent one amongst homophobes. They don't realize the difference because in bigoted circles the words are synonymous.

Fifth, I grew up hearing that acceptance of gay relationships in America was going to cause God to destroy the country like he had wiped out previous nations, like he had done to Sodom and Gomorrah. There are folks in positions of power and authority who are just making shit up and some people don't know any better bc they're in a bubble with little to no out gay people. It's harder to think gay people are going to bring down god's fiery wrath when there's a loving Jesus following gay couple in the neighboring pew or as your actual neighbor. Many people in these bigoted communities don't have enough experience with gay people to realize at first just how full of shit their leaders are and after they roll it into their worldview the change is so hard to make they're stuck like that.

I agree with you that "I don't hate LGBTQ people!! I just disagree with their lifestyle ✨💖" are still being bigoted. They would vote against my rights as a gay man and that is discrimination based on sexual orientation. They would likely still oppress me by-proxy if they could. They would vote for someone else to put the boot on my neck, but they wouldn't do it themselves.

And like there is that difference. I would rather that brand of Christian than a Nazi, or then the brand of Christian who thinks gay people should be rounded up and shot. I think it's a false equivalency to say they're the same. A society where homophobes have to be passive aggressive to maintain social acceptance rather than acceptance is one where gay people get to live longer. It's not perfect, but it is improved.

However, I also understand that it's so fucking frustrating because it's impossible to get the love the sinner hate the sin type Christian to see the harm they're doing and how hateful they are coming off. It feels worse because it's candy coated shit and you would've rather seen the shit coming. You would rather the violence know its own name than pretend to be love. It makes love feel hollow and empty because what they're handing you is this broken twisted version.

And we deserve better than that.

[kevinsdsy]

THE TROJANS SOCIAL MEDIA AU HEADCANONS pt. 1

laila dermott

laila dermott is muslim!! i've had this headcanon since i read the king's men for the first time in 2019 hehe and now is my time to push it.

nabil & laila are besties. they're both muslim and both in same-sex relationships which leads to them having an understanding of each other like no one else on the team could have with them.

ntm laila fr was his standing pillar when he was figuring out his sexuality

nabil mahmoud

nabil is gay!! which is something he really had to deal with and accept due to him being muslim too (bc what am i without the religious trauma due to sexuality lore)

nabil and tony are dating each other in the socmed au!! even without the au i would like to believe and headcanon there's something happening there :))

i've written a bit more about them in another headcanon post tho.

antonio "tony" jones

tony is what like a year or two older than the rest? he's an assistant and i'm not sure how old they're supposed to be in the book tbh so i would like to think it's possible or he's an intern (i love him being an intern either way tho so i'm very much leaning into that one)

jeremy knox

JEREMY KNOX USED TO PLAY FOOTBALL (soccer), but due to him playing so aggressively and due to him always being guilty of too many fouls he switched to exy :))

cody winter

cody doesn't know what sleep is and they don't care to find out. they're living on like 2 to 4 hours a sleep a night and surprisingly enough it works for them too.

cody is also SUPER competitive which is why they have managed to be part of the captain gc. their competiteviness has led to them pushing the backliners as much as cody can and the backliners actually listen to them too.

shawn anderson

oh shawn. shawn shawn shawn.

you were supposed to be no one. a random guy on the team.

you exist to me now. i feel like i could make a whole post about just him atp.

shawn was supposed to be comedic relief for the posts i felt were too out of character for the rest of the team LMAOO, but now he actually has a personality (to me)

shawn works a part time shop at a café. even though he's surrounded by coffee at all times and drinks so much of it he's the sleepiest guy to ever exist.

like that man gets about 8 hours a sleep every day and still takes nap, but still ends up with bags under his eyes.

he's always tired for some reason and everyone is so used to it atp. like he will ALWAYS sleep on the bus/airplane, no matter how long the drive/flight is.

but when he's finally awake he's so hyper. he says the silliest things. repeats the same phrases over and over again and has about zero filter.

most of the time the zero filter has to do with the fact he speaks before he thinks. it even catches himself off guard sometimes.

i feel like this is too long and we haven't even gotten into jean and shawn dynamic so i'm just gonna cut it off here and they’ll get another part i think

derrick allen

bro we don't even know who derrick is, but apparently he's someone to me now too.

this man has crazy attachment issues, but is also the biggest simp for shawn too.

he likes going around kissing shawn and making out with shawn, but whenever shawn mentions something serious derrick acts like it's just a joke. which i guess is easy to do, because shawn is always treating everything as a joke anyways. except he's really not trying to when it comes to derrick.

jean falls victim to shawn ranting and crying about derrick. so jean respectfully ignores derrick til he gets his shit together.

and i just realised i have SO MUCH to say about derrick and shawn too so let me cut myself off.

derek thompson

same as shawn and derrick. derek is supposed to be a no one, but here i am and suddenly derek is being perceived by me too

SOOO derek was supposed to be like the third party with derrick and shawn. it was supposed to be the three of them flirting and making out and being little shits but then y'all were asking about derrick & shawn and i decided yk what let's do it. then later the short oneshot was written by oomf and derek got mentioned as the one shawn is in love with and i was like oh... i fucked up the dynamic. but in another universe it would've been the three of them ig

ANYWAYYSS derek takes medication. i haven't really decided on what kind of medications, but while thinking about him i always imagined either depression or adhd or both idk

and i have so many more headcanons for the au, but this is too long so i´ll post part 2 another time :))

[suzukiblu]

WIP excerpt for lottie behind the cut; a pocketful of Kons. (( chrono || non-chrono ))

“No,” she snaps. “You just want to keep trying to wear me down about this.” 

“You think I’m going to let you go meet Superman on the Watchtower?” Mom demands. “With no way off it and no way for me to know what’s happening up there?!” 

“It’s the Watchtower, not the Fortress of Solitude!” Cassie fumes. Even if it were the Fortress of Solitude, it’s not like– 

“Kal is not currently on the Watchtower, Helena,” Diana interrupts gently. “And even if he were, I would certainly not take Cassie to see him without at least informing you, nor leave them immediately unchaperoned.” 

“That doesn’t make me feel better, Diana!” Mom snaps. “You’d still take her!” 

“I would defer to Cassie’s preferences in at least meeting him, yes,” Diana agrees. “Being prepared for the worst is an understandable instinct, my friend, but fixating on the possibility will not help the situation.” 

“She’s a child!” Mom says furiously. “She isn’t going anywhere near that man!” 

“He’s my soulmate!” Cassie shouts at her. “And I’m old enough to go see him if I want! Heck, I'll be eighteen soon, I could go live with him if I wanted!"

“Cassie!” Mom says, looking horrified. Cassie glowers at her defensively, folding her arms. She could. She could probably do it now, even. That’s a thing sometimes, when a guardian or caretaker or relative or whatever tries to sabotage soulmate relationships. Like, legally it’s a thing, she means. There’s definitely been minors who got emancipated to be with soulmates their parents didn’t approve of. Like–usually it’s gay or interracial or different-religion soulmates, she’s pretty sure, but still. Age differences have definitely done it too. 

If her mom’s going to keep trying to push it . . . 

“Cassie?” Cas asks worriedly. He’s still holding Odie, floating in the middle of the kitchen and looking anxious again, and Cassie bites her tongue. That’s another reason her mom’s not coming. She keeps upsetting him, and Cassie’s having a hard time not making it worse herself, because she keeps saying such awful things that Cassie can’t bite back her responses to. 

“It’s okay, Cas,” she says, and he chirps anxiously and then lets Odie down on the kitchen table before zipping back over to her to bob in the air in and around her head, hovering around her in restless loops. 

“Cassie Cassie Cassie,” he frets. “Wondy!” 

“That’s me, yeah,” Cassie says, trying to smile at him, then reaches up with cupped hands and lets him drop into them. He lands on his knees and pats anxiously at her face with both hands. 

“Cassieeeee,” he frets again, and she exhales and brings him in against her collarbone. He throws his arms around her neck the best he can and clings to her. 

She knows Pockets are more emotionally open and honest than the people they came from, usually, but is Superman really like this? 

That’s . . . really sad, actually, and makes her feel kind of bad for him. Cas is sweet and wonderful, but he’s also clearly just so anxious and worried, and so easy to upset, and maybe it’s just because he’s brand-new, but obviously Superman’s not brand-new, so . . .

Well. Maybe that’s why Superman’s got another soulmate. If he needs more attention or support, or just more people in his life, or just . . . something like that, Cassie doesn’t really know. Maybe a less-destructible soulmate, since as far as anyone knows his other one is just a standard baseline human. Probably he worries about her, considering, especially if he really gets anxious this easily. 

She just doesn’t get why her mom is so upset about something like that. If she can help something like that, well–that’s what soulmates are for, right? 

“Our presence has been requested because the League would like to speak to Cassie and meet Castor,” Diana says while Mom is glaring at Cas again, because Mom is being the worst about this and Diana is at least, like, being fair. “Mostly to assess the situation, especially since Kal is allegedly in Metropolis again. Or at least, someone claiming his name and face is.” 

“Yeah, I saw a feed of him online,” Cassie says, biting her lip as she remembers that odd–empty look, almost, that’d been on Superman’s face. It didn’t look anything like any of Cas’s expressions have so far, considering. Or any other expression she’s ever seen on his face. Not that they’ve met, obviously, but Superman’s in the news all the time. She’s seen his face a thousand times in her life, and it’s never looked like . . . that. 

“Ah, did you?” Diana asks, tilting her head before giving her a nod. “Yes, there have been quite a few posted in the past hour or so, apparently. People are–concerned, given . . . everything.” 

“Right,” Cassie says, thinking of that empty expression again and trying not to grimace at the memory of it. Cas really isn’t anything like that, though. Has Superman lost his memory, maybe, or . . . something? He died, so if he came back a little different . . . 

Well. Cas isn’t as empty-faced as that news feed was, but also isn’t very much like the pictures she’s seen of Superman before either, really. So . . . 

So she isn’t sure, really, what that means. Is he hurt? Is something wrong with him? Does he need help? 

She didn’t see his Pocket on the feed. Not the one he’s had all these years in the public eye, and not one from herself either. Maybe he just hasn’t slept, though. Is that a thing? She always thought both soulmates had to be asleep at the same time for Pockets to appear, but maybe not. Maybe that’s just an old wives’ tale or something. And who knows how that even works with Kryptonians, anyway? Who knows if Kryptonians even sleep? Like, ever? 

She could ask Diana, she guesses, but it’s probably not the time.

[boimann]

What about medic x heavy really does it for you? Is it their individual characters? Their symbiosis during gameplay? The way they look together? No hate, just curious.

Sorry if this is a repeat ask

hi no problem I jump at any opportunity to gush about heavymedic :D

i think it's a mix of a few things, a lot of the stuff you suggested are it actually!

I do love them both on their own, they are very easily my favorite characters. I also think their personalities are very compatible, they are opposite in a way (medic being the more hyper one who can't shut up and heavy being the seemingly calmer quiet one) but they also have a lot in common they are both insane, violence loving incredibly intelligent men. and the fact that this compatibility carries over to their gameplay is just *chef's kiss* ya know?

on the battlefield heavy is this devastating force ready to gun down anything that moves and has a massive health pool but he is the slowest class in the game which can leave him extremely vulnerable to pick classes, while medic on the other hand is fast but kind of easy to kill, he has low health and can't output much damage and he also has a huge target on his back being the team's only healer. but together they complement each other perfectly!! medic can watch heavy's back and heal him and heavy can protect medic by shielding him from incoming damage and gun down anyone who gets too close. also uber charges are the equivalent of in game gay sex to me

and yes I am a sucker for big man x even bigger man, you said it best they look good together, I can't deny that a big part of why I love this pairing is because I'm extremely gay for both of them, I'm a simple man ok?

but also I feel like there are a lot of ways to interpret their dynamic that I love, I see a lot of people saying that heavymedic is boring but I think that's because a lot of the fandom is stuck only seeing them as being a soft old married couple (which is super valid I love this interpretation of them too) but there are a ton more!! they can be a brutal couple of manics, they can be a mad scientist and his favorite experiment, they can be an freak of a man x "oh shit my freak of a man is doing things!" etc... there is a lot of untapped potential that i'd like people to explore more

and finally I love that their whole relationship revolves around trust, heavy trusted medic to literally mess around with his heart in meat the medic, and trusted medic enough to jump in front of him while they were being charged by a bunch of enemy soldiers so medic could test out the machine he stabbed into his heart that had litterally blown up his previous one, and in the last comic medic trusted an extremely injured heavy to get up and finish cheavy after medic had distracted the him, Chevy was filled with australium and hated him enough to kill him once before and medic only had a pen to defend himself

idk I just that's beautiful

[marq-lynch]

Happy New Year, Non-Wrestling and Non-AEW wrestling friends!

My wrestling blorbos are finally live on HBO MAX tonight if you want to check them out!

It's going to be a great introductory episode to jump into blind if you'd like but here's the fast and easy rundown for what we're hoping for:

Fight for the Fallen is an annual special episode of Dynamite and this year it's being hosted by tag team FTR as a benefit for their hometown of Asheville which was hit hard by the hurricane last year.

FTR has teamed up with the Rated R Superstar Adam Copeland, to form Rated FTR, and they're determined to take down the Death Riders, who are currently holding an iron grip on AEW as baddies. Copeland's return last month also signals the return of Old Man Yaoi for 2025 as he is very divorced and his ex-husband Christian Cage is already Sweating as this ruins his plans.

We've also been waiting for a gay breakup with The Acclaimed (Bowens can do so much better) and The Hurt Syndicate are the new powerhouse faction in AEW that might just be able to break the camel's back tonight. Please.

Julia Hart, our Goth Queen has finally returned from injury and we're delighted to see her and her faction back in action. The House of Black always delivers (and always wins)

And in the realm of 'I am too close to this to have normal opinions about it' Hangman Adam Page, the beloved anxious millennial cowboy of AEW is currently in his 'Utterly Unhinged and Making Great Life Choices' Black Hat Era because of... Reasons, and Orange Cassidy, ultra laid back and chill guy you cannot piss off has finally had Enough.

It's going to be fun, and makes AEW a lot more available to a lot more people who don't want to bother with cable television, VPNs, or additional obscured streaming add-ons.

The first year of AEW's PPVs and Dynamite (2019) has also been added to MAX on demand, and they've promised to update it on a rolling basis to let people catch up along with two months backlog of the most recent shows (in 2025 that will be Wednesday Night Dynamite and Saturday Night Collision).

So if you're curious about the promotion that has consumed so many people over the last several years by making the alternative more mainstream, and tv wrestling a gayer, kinkier, bloodier, and all around weirder, now's your chance!

Or hey, if you're seeing this post later? HBO MAX is still there.

[wthtorke]

Avp Elder Headcanons

SFW

Elder is a tired old man and all he ever wants in life is peace and quiet. That said, please hug this man and tell him you love him, he'll melt. Being an elder is no easy business, he has many responsibilities and being the mothership's commander drains him to no end. While his position is highly regarded and of the utmost honor, like any job, Elder often finds himself wanting to scream and run away. Though these thoughts do vanish when your relationship gets serious, of course. Elder feels reborn every time he wakes up by your side. There is just something in seeing you laying next to him on the huge bed you share. Yautjas value this part of relationships to another level; being vulnerable. The feeling he gets when he sees you shift a bit, inching more toward him in your sleep is priceless. Nothing could ever compare to knowing that in those 20 minutes he has before having to get up, it's just you and him. No ship, no clans, no problems. Just the two of you and nothing else. Elder has no time for public displays of affection for he's very busy during his shift, but he tries his best to check on you at least once during the day if your jobs don't align.

NS//FW

While one must think Elder must be sexually satisfied due to his position on the ship, Elder held no real interest in pursuing short term partners. No interest and no time, that is. While Elder is patient and doesn't mind taking things slow, sex with him is intense. He will always favor holding you down and using his weight to pin you down. If you catch him after a particular rough shift, be prepared to be bed ridden for the next day. Another thing he discovers with dating a human is he doesn't need to be in control all the time. He has an awakening when you tell him he should just lie down and leave the rest to you. Quickly becomes a fan of being taken care of once in a while. If you have a praise thing, Elder is right up your alley. Contrary to belief, he's very vocal; his job requires him to be vocal and he definitely has no problem telling you how good you're doing during sex. Just like the praise, he also has no qualms in correcting you if you happen to disobey his rules. While his patience runs thin with overly disobedient/challenging people, hearing you tease to him has him using authority techniques in the best way possible to get you back on track.

--- This was seen in November on 💫Patre0n💫

Reminder that I've got a $1 tier so pls support this lil gay alien simp, thanks for reading, hope you liked it <3

[velvetvexations]

I figured it out, I figured out how to explain part of the link between tankies and trfs and in fact how they even almost got me once upon a time.

It's the essential oppositional thinking, where everyone else's grass is greener - a step beyond your usual black and white, "X is bad, Y is good," all the way into "X is bad, therefore its very nature is bad and it can be nothing but bad, and Y is considered its opposite, so Y is good and will always be good."

Being a woman is good for them, therefore being a woman Is Good, it is objectively good, this is a universal fact, therefore it is ALSO an immutable universal fact that being a man is inherently bad. Good old fashioned oppositional sexism, in a pink hat, just like every flavor of radfeminism.

And in international politics? It doesn't seem like a coincidence that most tankie trfs are American:

The US's economic system is fucked, and we've probably never been the good guy in ANY international relation, therefore any country that has an adversarial relationship with the US government must be wholly inscrutable.

Russia was a utopia, actually, until they just RANDOMLY decided to start hating gay people out of nowhere, and if we could just get her back to her glory days everything would be amazing, and no this is totally not a RETVRN statement about a fantasy past what are you talking about? This is simply the truth, because we know that the US government doesn't like them and hated them even more then, and the US government is Bad, therefore anyone the US government doesn't like must be doing EVERYTHING right.

China has never had a problem with corruption and state-sanctioned violence and disaster mismanagement. We know this to be true, because the US has those things, and the US government is unfriendly with that of China, so we are opposites, so if we are Bad they must be Good. They must have gotten everything right.

If that's the level you're operating on, it feels like a very natural conclusion, and when you're just learning how deep the rabbit hole of "sexism is more than just 'get back in the kitchen' jokes" and/or "America is usually the bad guy in the international politics game and imperialism really fucking sucks" goes, it's easy to end up slipping into that level without realizing it.

I mean, if the other guy was ACTUALLY doing bad things, then why didn't people just expose THAT instead of making shit up for propaganda? (@ my younger self: because they thought the actual bad stuff was the okay part, dipshit (lovingly).)

String Theory but for internet leftist assholes. Congratulations, anon.

[mikashida]

u seem like u have a lot of wolverine headcanons pls ... 🤲

you've enabled my rambling just know that you did this to yourself. I do also wanna quickly disclaimer I've not read many of the x men let alone wolverine comics so idk how much of this *is* canon or has been mentioned, I was raised by people who thought comics were evil and would "Turn Me Gay" so I only got to watch the movies because obviously movies can't turn you gay (they did)

most of these are kinda depressing the only funny one is the first one

for like General Headcanons that would apply to all variants i 10000% believe the gruff gravelly voice is fake and he just Does That intentionally. I'm not saying his voice isn't deep but the whole like "ruruuuhughgh. im trhe best at what i do but what i do best aint very nice hnrnrghh..." is overplayed. so when he gets nervous or caught off guard his voice raises like at least half an octave. to illustrate what I mean here's a cutscene from the origins game

I also think he tries to drink to slow his healing factor and not necessarily to get buzzed. this is pretty much canon in Logan, but even outside of that canon he's very often been shown to at Least be fascinated by the idea of being mortally wounded if not genuinely suicidal at times and i imagine drinking consistently kinda fucks with that. like let's say he's physically harmed while intoxicated i figure it would probably hurt more/heal slower than it would if he was sober if that makes sense.

to continue with that i think he's tried to kill himself a lot and not in the funny way that deadpool does (like when he shoots himself in the game to get out of a conversation with colossus lmfao) (not saying that deadpool hasnt Genuinely tried to either though) probably doesn't bother anymore but imagine being like fuckin 20 years old and you cant die and you have So Much ptsd and no way to deal with it because its the fucking 1800s

i generally think his ptsd affects him a lot more than the movies and comics let on, which I understand because it's not easy to write when you don't have experience with it. I think it was written really well in deadpool and wolverine though, I am very tired of the perfect victim trope and I like that this logan is actually. kind of a horrible person (I have more headcanons about that but I will stop with this one). he failed his world and that made him the man that saved the universe, but that doesn't cancel out his wrongdoings, and now that he has people in his life again he has a responsibility to do better for those around him

tldr wolverine has issues and i want to make them worse