#but again: didnt finish reading through it properly

[elegyofthemoon]

i wonder if anyone's discussed the buddha statues and their representations of the days of the week and their general meaning yet or am i going to have to do that

[bythepen98]

Doodles || Silver Trio 💚

Drew this on my sticky notes at work during my free time.

I first started sketching Pansy out of boredom and, in the middle of it, got the idea to draw all three of them. Blaise was second (had fun with him) and finished with Draco earlier today.

Somehow I work best on smaller surfaces. My brain goes whoosh when I used a normal a4 paper but immediately got to drawing the moment I pulled out my sticky notes. Probably because there's less pressure to make it /good/.

I didnt include Theo because, to this day, no matter how many hp fics I've read up to this point and even with him as the main love interest in several of those, I still don't have a clear fixed image of him in my head. Personality and appearance wise. And anyways, the Draco-Pansy-Blaise tandem have always been the clearest to me. Their dynamic is just *chefs kiss.

Pansy having to wrangle in her boys while also being a wild, out of control character herself is a fun image. I can see Theo being Draco's bestfriend but not a part of the trio (dont ask me why; it's a dynamic that makes sense to me). He can be the overall handler of the three and oversee their goofiness until it gets to the point that he has to do damage control. Almost always happens when they're in the same general vicinity with the golden trio.

Note: It's my first time drawing Pansy and Blaise so what you're seeing here isn't really my final image of them. I know what I *want* them to look like in my head but I'm still figuring out how to show it properly through my drawing. There might be changes if I draw them again in the future.

[hauntedgarden95]

“There’s another world,” Loghain rasps, pulling his wife up the ledge behind him, “Where instead of all the world ending shit we get to properly retire.” Vie chuckles, steadying herself on him once she’s up, “And in another universe we never met.” He ignores her, something he does when she says things like that, “Where we have a dog-“

“A mabari-“

“A mabari,” He agrees, something like a smile maybe closer to a smirk flicks across his face. His sword makes contact with the throat of a darkspawn, decapitating it in one swing, they had been tearing through darkspawn this entire time but they continue talking as if they’re not, “We would be in our backyard with the Mabari, maybe we could have a garden I was a farmer.”

She smiles a little, even as the darkspawn blood flies everywhere, “Ah yes you kneeling in the dirt with those bad knees-“ He grunts, whether at her or the darkspawn he just took out is up in the air.

There is a bit of silence, besides the usual darkspawn sounds and fighting grunts, as they fight through a particularly thick group of the bastards but when they’re able to breath again Vie says, “I’d have somewhere to read.” He hums only half listening and she scoffs at him and says a little louder, “I’d have somewhere to read.”

“I thought you didn’t want to play pretend.”

“I’m humoring you,” She says lifting her chin in that usual snarky way, but she’s smiling again.

“A place to read,” He agrees, “Like a hammock or something similar.”

“A hammock,” She agrees stepping up to him and wiping a streak of blood off his face making his head tilt down toward her, “Big enough for both of us?”

“Both of us?” She ignores his amused tone as she gets on her tip toes, brushing their noses together, “Yes so that you can pretend you don’t want to lay with me when I ask you but you climb in anyway.”

He hums, the crinkles around his eyes softening, “And then you’d make me read to you and somewhere in there you’d fall asleep I’m sure.” She huffs a laugh and he feels it ghost across his face, “Would that be so terrible?”

“Absolutely,” He says, one hand coming up to cup her face and closes the distance between them. The kiss doesn’t last long, the screeches of darkspawn getting closer make them pull away but not before both sets of lips are bruised.

”Staying here doesn’t help us,” Vie sighs, not even attempting to hide her annoyance. The older man chuckles, “Then I say we find the closest exit and finish that conversation elsewhere.”

Vie hums in agreement, eyes already dancing around trying to figure out where they are. She’s not looking at him when she says, “Is that what you want?”

The question isn’t about taking a momentary respite from hunting down the broodmother they have been looking for. It’s about something much more… tentative. His eyes meet hers and linger there, “I never thought I’d live this long,” hers seem to say. Longhair inclines his head in response, “Neither did I.”

“Yes,” is all he says aloud and its so minimal, if you didnt know her well you wouldn’t see it, but her shoulders seem to relax the slightest as she exhales, “Okay.” Another smile, maybe a little more timid than the last. But there is no time to dwell on it as another wave of darkspawn rise up to meet their graves.

[sehrgefaelltmir]

Hey any fic recs? I really like yours so I figured you'd have good recommendations. I'd read just about any ship

hi!!! aw thank you so much, that means a lot. i haven’t had a lot of time to read lately (also i have the attention span of a gnat lmao) so i’m just gonna list all the best fics that i can think of,,, theres no real theme theres no criteria lmao. i kinda just like stuff w good writing. all of these are amazingly written i wish i could write something half as good as these 😭😭

my favourite fics (off the top of my head) are:

UEFA High by maxevader / @liverpool-enjoyer (i feel like anyone who hasn’t read this is living under a rock sekskjdbd but i gotta mention it anyway cause i adore it) it’s a high school au, literally EVERYONE is in it. well not everyone but,,, a lot. theres a load of different ships (i came for müllendowski ofc but im kinda pulling for alisson/vvd rn they’re really cute i’m rooting for them) and some really sweet friendships too (thomas & manu, robbo & trent, gavi & pedri are my favourites) honestly i don’t wanna spoil it just go in blind if u haven’t read it already cause it’s so so worth it, it’s so funny and so sweet and also very relatable and ughhhhh man i could talk abt it forever

while we’re at it i want to be loved (not to be touched) (also by maxevader) is also really fucking good, it’s gavi-centric, very angsty, SO well-written, the stars aligned or some shit and i read it at exactly the right moment in my life and it made me cry a bit (a lot)

how long could we be a sad song? by moonwedes / @tchouameninga, it’s a suuuuper super angsty müllendowski fic about lewy’s decision to leave bayern and what led up to it. the writing is incredible n it made me so fucking sad. i cannot recommend this one enough it is SO good, just. man the characterisation and the little details and how inevitable and tragic it feels,,, ughhh it’s amazing

Another Plane of Shambles by fipsareyougay,,, again i kinda feel like anyone who likes my fics has probably read this already cause it’s like. THE bayern/german nt fic lmao sorry. but i gotta mention it anyway cause it’s one of my favourite fics ever. it’s like 600k words and kinda intimidating to get into cause theres like a million characters and ships and subplots but it is so. so fucking good. off the top of my head the main ships are neuller, mesut/sami, schweinski, götzeus, toni/jonas hector (random ahh ship but it works lmao), leno/ter stegen, but there’s like 183737 other ships too. it’s hilarious but also like,, really really sad. like EVERYONE is going through it, it gets quite dark sometimes. also it’s not finished lmao like i don’t think it’s been updated for like a year at this point, but.. i honestly don’t think it matters?? like it’s so fucking good as it is i fr don’t mind if its not updated, whats there is enough (for me at least). its SUCH an experience i love it so much and i will recommend it to literally everyone, whether ur a german nt fan or not

domestic pressures by fivesecrets is also really REALLY fuckin good. the main ship is lewy/b**teng, which… yeah it’s not a ship i like for… obvious reasons lol but this fic is so well-written that i just can’t not include it. id actually feel bad if i didnt include it cause the writing is so SO fucking good,, i don’t think i’ve read any of this author’s other fics now that i think of it, but i really should. i feel so inadequate every time i think about this fic cause the writing is just that good. like,, the prose. if i ever write something as beautifully as this its all over for u bitches. it also has bravertz as a background ship which i LOVE. (SIDE NOTE DOES ANYONE HAVE ANY MORE BRAVERTZ RECS PLS I WILL LOVE YOU FOREVER 👉👈)

one of my all-time favourite fics is Lunar by Redbull_gave_me_wings. (this is the fic that made me finally decide to start properly writing n posting instead of just writing random paragraphs in my notes app. so i’ll love it forever for that reason alone) i don’t rlly know how to explain this one lmao it’s kinda complicated, it’s… basically a werewolf au?? which seems really random for a football fic lmao but it works. i adore this fic. just,, the characterisation and the world-building and the memories i have of reading it (spring 2022 when i was supposed to be studying for my leaving cert lmao) and the relationship between the 3 main characters (thomas, lewy and marco, müllendowski are an established relationship and theres also kinda hints of götzeus if you squint??) i just love the story, all the side characters, the world and the lore,,,, dldkdkdj i need to reread it omg

the next one is UNFINISHED 😭 but i want to include it just cause i love it so much: welcome to the underworld by bibliophile357. another one that i rlly don’t know how to explain lmao. it’s basically a greek mythology au w müllendowski as the main ship, lewy is hades and thomas is persephone. there’s also a few other ships, i think seriker is kinda the biggest secondary one tho?? (i might be wrong lmao i read it aaages ago. like before i even had an ao3 account i think 😭) the greatest (greek) tragedy of them all is that this fic was never finished. like i got to the last chapter and was genuinely heartbroken that there was no ending cause the writing and the development of the main ship was so beautiful. i don’t think it ever will be finished either bc it hasn’t been updated since 2017 lmao but still it’s one of my favourite fics

also there’s a few other oneshots that i rlly rlly love, all soooooo so well-written: (also all müllendowski now that i think abt it 😭😭 im too loyal to them sjdkskdjjd im a one-club player. thomas müller just like me fr)

at night i think about you by restless5oul

must mean it’s the low season by ssilverarrowss

History Has Its Eyes On You by thomasmxller

n the last ones i can think of are kinda just like. short lil meet-cute aus. yknow for someone who has never even considered writing an au there sure are a lot of aus on this list 😭😭 i just have thing for them ig

the first one is Kawiarnia by lesbleusthroughandthrough, it’s a coffee shop au, lewy/szczęsny, which,, i can’t see them as anything but friends when i write them but like,, in this au it just works (you gotta read that in a todd howard voice) i WISH there was more of this au cause it was so funny and so cute, i reread it sometimes when i need a laugh

and the second one is (darling so it goes) some things are just meant to be by bleedingdaylight. its,, idk, a not-footballers au?? idk what to call that 😭 it’s a rlly sweet götzeus fic abt mario having a lil crush on marco, v sweet v funny 10/10. i ADORE götzeus they’re so cute in this fic (also theres a dog. named borussia)

thats,,, a really random list lmao sorry 😭😭 it’s kinda just all my favourites. i fr need to get back into just reading fics, i kinda just write in my spare time i barely read anything anymore. also i probably missed some other really good fics so if anyone wants to add anything pls do!!!

[k0r3-h34rt]

sometimes I feel so fucking stupid. So useless. Worthless.

Why can't I just be normal. Why can't I sleep. Why can't I just close my eyes and wake up in the morning. Why and I always up at 1am. 2am. 3am. 4am.

Why do I simply not sleep some nights.

Why can I not remember.

Why do I not remember.

Why can I not be normal.

Why. Why WHy. WHY? WHY AM I LIKE THIS. WHY AM I SO FUCKING MESSED UP.

Why can't I just function properly. Why do I have to have so many issues. Why can't I have a properly functioning body. Why do I always have to be in pain. Why can't my ears work properly. Why don't my eyes see normally. Why do I have to be like this. Why am I in this body. Why can't I be normal. Why can't I just be a girl. Or have a boys body. Why do I have to be this dysphoric, depressed, fucked up epicentre. Why do I have to be a boy in a girls body. Why can't anyone love me for me. Not for my tits. Not for my body. Not for the attention. Not for the pity. Not for the fucked up experience. Why can't someone just love me. Why am I never enough. Why.

Why do I always hurt. Why must I ache so deeply with no cure. Why must I live. Why do I have to care. Why can't I just not care about others. Why am I such a fucking coward that I can't drive a knife through my chest and finish this nightmare. Why can't I wake up from this horrific dream.

Why was I punished for trying to be kind. I simply wanted to give them a friend. I guess I found out why they had none. Why must I be haunted by my actions committed with the purest heart and the kindest intentions.

Why couldn't my attempts have worked. Why did my attempts never work. Why were they all too weak. Why am I too weak. Why can't I just end this nightmare. Why do I have to care that it would hurt others. Why do I care that people would cry. Far more people would never even know. It's getting bad.

I know if I take my meds I'll feel better. But do I even want to.

Life sucks. People suck. I'm lonely, I'm hurt. No one sees me for me. No one thinks of me. They think of the person they want me to be when they look at me.

I want to read and make art and write. But whats the point.

There are days where I can barely get out of bed. There are days I don't. My teeth are yellow. I can't stand in the shower. I don't know how humour works. I bluescreen when people say something I don't have a programmed response to. My limbs feel wrong. I want to tear my ribs from my chest. I want to hurt myself again. I want to feel the comforting sting of my blade instead of this hollow void. this yearning emptiness inside me. this. nothingness I feel.

I keep thinking of what my psychiatrist has said to me. "People see scars like that and go 'oh she's crazy' dont cut, because you dont want people to think you're crazy right?" "You can't have a mental illness till you're in your late twenties, you can exhibit symptoms, but I can't diagnose you silly." "You can't have that issue, it's so obvious in people when they have it" "You're crazy" "You just have to cut people out if they're a shark"

LIKE I FUCKING KNEW SHE WAS A TOXIC PERSON SUSAN. I WAS 10. SHE THREATENED TO HURT HERSELF, TO KILL HERSELF IF I LEFT. IF I DIDNT LET HER TOUCH ME SHE'D CRY AND ASK IIF I HATED HER. IF SHE WASNT GOOD ENOUGH. I WAS FUCKING 10 SUSAN. I CANT FIGHT EMOTIONAL AND PSYCHOLOGICAL ABUSE THAT KEEPS ME IN A SEXUALLY AND PHYSICLALY ABUSIVE RELATIONSHIP SUSAN. I was 10. How was I meant to be able to deal with that. I see my friends go through similar things, years later. at an age where they're mature enough not to shatter.

I want to die

I want it to end

I want to kill myself

I want to run a knife through my chest

I want to take all my prescription meds in one go

I want it to be over

I want to be at peace

I just want some peace

please

end me

I want a moment of freedom. from the pain. the memories. the ache. the numbness. the void. the thing eating away at me inside.

I CAN STILL FEEL HER HANDS ON IN OVER TOUCHING ME

i just want it to stop

[rayplaysotomes]

ok!! noritsune route post!! my silly! i have GOT to draw this guy. idk when ill get around to it but. i love his design sm.

as usual, spoiler warnings for noritsune’s route in birushana under the cut!

okokok!! first off, i wanted to talk about how much hes matured as a person and how his character develops throughout his route because i feel like thats the thing i thought of the most. like, he started out only seeing things through the lense of the heike, the towards the end he has a much broader perspective of the world and really considers his place in it. and like, he grew up being compared to shanao a lot because they were the same age and in similar positions in their respective clans, and bc he is very competitive, he was determined to fight her and sorta prove his worth in a way. atleast thats how i read that bit. 

then when he DOES fight her for a moment, and later gets to talk with her for a minute, he really sees their similarities and grows to like her, even if he still wants to duel with her. then of course theres how once he hears shanao talk about wanting to be seen as herself, and not only under the guise of genji or heike, he understands how she feels, and later accepts being disowned very easily and just leaves. then after seeing shanao again in hiraizumi and she saves him, he returns to the heike and takes care of his responsibilities. 

plus!!! when they met again in battle he wanted to fight her and there was that whole scene where he says shes running away from fighting him. interesting i think. and after that, when they were in kyoto trying to help the villagers while yoshinakas army was looting everything, and he said he wouldnt let her die until he could properly duel her. im sobbing. or in that same scene how he was explaining how hes ever felt so close and so similar to another person????? it really seems like at this point, he cant admit to himself that he actually just really cares about her, so he justifies the duel as a way to stay near her. 

then of course theres the last fight on the boats, he was fully ready to die during his fight with shanao before they had left. 

idk, i feel like his whole dynamic with shanao is super interesting where he originally didnt like her because of how often they were compared to each other, then he realized how similar they actually were, how much he could relate to her, and how she was actually a very good person and he cared for her a lot. i feel like this especially helped him mature and develop. 

and not only was noritsunes dynamic with shanao super interesting, the romance aspects of the route were really sweet. like!!! when the children wanted to dress up shanao like a princess!!! and noristune comes back and gets all jealous cause other people got to see her like that before he did!!! and he asks her to stay and live with him after the war!!

also!! shanao has become one of my favourite mcs idc if ive only finished one route so far she means everything to me. like she starts off only sorta seeing things from a black and white perspective, then once she sees yoshinakas army looting kyoto, and the heike children, and grows to really care about noritsune, she sees that there are bad people who are part of the genji clan, and that there are good people within the heike. and she comes to realize that all she really wants is to help people. she really just wants everyone to be okay. idk this is just such a well written aspect of her character imo, and i really respect this. 

[trainingdummyrabbit]

Hey, I know you're a Projmoon fan, I guess I'm curious because I'm at an impasse on what to do rn, did you play through the entirety of Lobotomy Corporation, did you just skip it entirely for Ruina, or did you read a summary/watch a cutscene compilation or let's play/something else? And what would you recommend as an approach? I've tried playing through Lobcorp but it's just extremely tedious and I'm considering skipping it to get to something I think I'll like more (Ruina)

oh!! ok my answer is a little bit complicated tbh; bc i havent. played any of the series at all. WAHAHA

what i personally did was um. attempt to watch an incomplete lobcorp lp ==> couple months radio silence ==> watched one (1) day of gameplay from a friend (for one boss fight specifically) ==> got recc'd summaries i slowly watched thru ==> couple months radio silence. ==> watched someone else's (actually complete) lp ==> (rabbit hole'd) summaries again.

um. dont do that. JSNBGKHDBK

im not gonna act like i Know how t tackle a series like this (since it took me like 4 circles around to Actually Commit to it (and also im kind of. new. here)) BUT from my personal opinion of the series and how it carries itself, i CAN recc at least Some order of something.

TRY to play Lobcorp! which i can kinda see is already done on your end. its something i Super want to try but absolutely know i wont finish SKJFNKDJF;; the main draw of PLAYING lobcorp is the struggle. it Sucks! its Long and Tedious and the game HATES you... and that's the point! it's plot relevant. it's an experience i didnt get to feel, but can so painfully just Understand by merit of watching someone else do it, only skipping about occasionally. tl;dr: the game loop is Telling A Story, Dragging You In-- THAT is the draw in insisting folks play it. it genuinely makes the... everything... hit that much harder. Once youve given it your best, dont feel ashamed to look for someone who's Done It! (i hear a lot of folks havent completed lobcorp themselves, so ✌) DONT UM . SKIP IT COMPLETELY THOUGH ruina is literally a Direct Sequel to it. i think it does a good enough job at introducing the setting on its own, but i am GRABBING YOU this shit will hit fucking DIFFERENT if you Understand. also its a lovely game worth looking at and appreciating bc GOD what a fucking experience those last few days are. i do not cry that easily to stuff like this but OUGH. AUGH. H

Wonderlab??? its a webcomic thats heavily reccommended you read through, but due to um. circumstances . it doesnt seem t be feasible atm. however, there IS a synopsis up thats pretty darn good! wonderlab, iirc, isn't directly plot relevant, but DOES introduce certain important concepts for ruina. however, it's not Mandatory, as ruina Also explains these things. as far as i know, its just a fun lil kickass story in the universe taking place between series you can look at if you want :)

Play Ruina! or watch, i guess. again, i watched an lp and it kicked the shit out of me emotionally (affectionate) so honestly do what you will here, i suppose.

honestly though, these are both super fucking long-ass and ridiculously heavy games so you're probably gonna be here a while. it took me like two weeks of committed watch time t look into Properly, and that was even when i started skipping straight to cutscenes at the latter half. embrace that! i cant stop you, but id heavily reccommend at the very least watching through the gameplay loop for a good chunk of the time-- giving the story that space really hammers home the... Everything. heavily heavily recc letting it Have that space.

for ruina specifically though, definitely at least watch through the beginning and ending legs of every fight-- and at least a solid chunk of every boss fight. if you're intent on skipping round gameplay loops like i did, imean. watch the boss fights watch the boss fights these fuckers do NOT play around. i cannot applaud these games' soundtracks enough and i wont say anything but trust me trust me trust me.

ANYWAY. here's the stuff that was recc'd to me, personally! if you wanna give watching through the series a go! :]

Lobcorp LP: [x] (Commentated+Completed! I couldn't find any no-commentary ones that were finished, but honestly for its gameplay loop it Helps. Blind on his end, but he does genuinely really like the series so i give it a thumbs up ✌) Ruina LP: [x] (Same guy :] also completed!) Lobcorp SUMMARY: [x] (Brief, but a good opener+summary!) Wonderlab SUMMARY: [x] (It Sure Is Wonderlab!!) Ruina SUMMARY: [x] [x] (Actually incomplete, but goes pretty well in depth and is easy to watch+absorb.) Alt SUMMARY: [x] (Consists of both parts of the duology! I haven't actually watched it in a while so i don't exactly remember much t say about it, but it sure is on my list!)

[traumasurvivorshelpingsurvivors]

tw: csa and cocsa, mentions of mental illness and derealisation/depersonalisation, it may be considered a vent too so be aware

hi, i'm immensely grateful for having a place to say this, or to talk about it with anyone, so if any of the mods decides to answer this ask, please know that the time and effort you put into it is greatly appreciated and i hope the best for you. <3

so, i'm not sure where i'm going with this so i'll make sure to proof read it when i'm finished and i'll try to keep things the least graphic i can. i would say i'm looking for advice or help, but really, it's not like other people can dig in my mind and memories for me. so maybe just reassurance, because i really really need to speak to someone who understands and has gone through my struggles as well, and going through this without even remembering properly is frustrating.

so. i've been sexually assaulted or molested as a child. this is what i suspect at least. the signs have always been there, but i've also experienced other trauma and i have other mental illnesses and issues, so they could have been caused by other things as well. i also have an awful, terrible memory and a dissociative disorder (i experience both depersonalisation and derealisation, to the point of psychosis sometimes), so my grasp on reality and memories is not good at all.

two years and a half ago, more or less, a very old memory from my childhood, of which i remember basically nothing, came back up while rewatching banana fish, an anime in which some major themes are rape and the sexual abuse of children. at that moment i felt very scared and very confused, and i didnt know what to do of it. i think i also kind of forgot or repressed it again.

almost two years later (last october) it all came back up again and this time i actually processed what had happened. i still didnt know what to do of it, and i partially still dont know now, but it's been troubling me. this memory is of me being touched in a sexual manner when i was still a child (i estimated that it's probably from ages 5 to 9, but who can be sure). i wish i could remember clearly, and more, because i'm uncertain about the real perpetrator (i dont know whether it is the person i remember, or if i just replace the person in my memories) and whether it really happened, and even if it was only this time or others (which i'm very suspicious about since i don't think that my reactions are justified just by this).

it's scary and, if i am correct, it really has scarred me without me even noticing. i have so many doubts and the thought of it has been bothering me a lot. i don't wish to remember for any reason (since it wouldn't be useful at all anymore) except for the fact that i *need* to know and understand to what extent i've been traumatised and find the cause to the various signs i've noticed.

it's so frustrating.

i've actually compiled a list of said signs that i've noticed, other than the resurfaced memory itself, and i have all the more reasons to believe that if the body knows then it did happen, but i hate not having more to work on. the more i think of it the more unreal it feels.

- klaus

Hi klaus,

I'm so sorry about what you've been through and please know you're not alone. It's important to acknowledge that memory recall can be tricky, and it's not uncommon to have doubts and uncertainties.

I think it’s important to consider that if you did go through something, it’s possible that you could be partially repressing it. Just because you don't have all the details doesn’t necessarily mean it didn’t happen, as memory is not only flimsy but having a dissociative disorder can exacerbate this.

That all being said, I don’t want to say for absolute sure that something happened because there simply isn’t enough information. If nothing happened, it would be dangerous to assume it did, so I would recommend to just give this some time and see if anything else comes up for you. it’s important to give yourself the time and space to heal and for those details to come back on their own. It can be distressing to not know where these things are coming from, but you can do damage to yourself when you actively search for memories that potentially aren’t ready to be explored.

Ultimately this could be something to explore with the guidance and mediation of a mental health professional such as a therapist, if you can access or afford it. A therapist, ideally one who specializes in trauma or dissociative disorders, can help you make sense of what you recall and give you ways to process this. Therapy can assist you in processing your emotions, managing dissociation, and gaining a deeper understanding of your trauma's impact.

Please know that healing is a gradual process, and it's normal to feel overwhelmed, confused, and uncertain at times. By reaching out and sharing your story, you're taking important steps towards healing and finding answers. I hope I could help, and please let us know if you need anything.

-Bun

[allamericansbitch]

i genuinely have you to thank for so much of my music taste rn. like i discovered gracie through you, i discovered the wrecks through you, i started listening to paramour, boygenius etc. i had listened to a bit of halsey and sabrina but i only properly got into them when i saw you raving about emails i can't send and if i can't have love i want power. i always kinda casually loved florence and hozier but i really started to get into them after seeing gifsets and such on your blog. and over the last week i have been listening to nothing other than stick season (we'll all be here forever). i listened to ethel cain for the first time in a car ride from the airport and i regret it so much because i couldn't finish preachers daughter and fully appreciate the songs on it on that half an hour car ride, but i'm gonna listen to it in full today! and i wouldn't have started listening if it weren't for seeing you reccommend it. so yeah, thank you for having such good music taste that it fully influenced mine :)

omg this is so sweet and wholesome i love it. i had a similar experience to listening to preachers daughter too, i listened to it at work and didnt give ti my full attention, then i read what it was about and was like HUH?? and went back and listened to it all over again lol. but thank you so much this is so nice 🥰

[garak]

here are my thoughts on the x-men movies since ive finished most of them

x-men (2000): in my top 3. love mags and xavier in this one mostly because its ian mckellan & patrick stewart. my main gripes are with the merging of magnetos and mystiques brotherhoods & the exclusion of destiny from the brotherhood. magneto being willing to sacrifice his life & another mutants for his dream to be realized seems pretty accurate but i feel like they didnt make it clear enough that if the plan worked he would have died too...? HATE wolverine trying to put the moves on jean grey but thats true regardless of whether its a movie or a comic or a stageplay for all i care.

x2: the plot of this one kind of lost me mostly because i havent read god loves man kills yet so i didnt have any basis to understand wtf was going on except stryker was there and hes evil. love maggy in the prison being emo and shit although them deciding when he can or cant fly or use certain powers seems pretty arbitrary... ? i feel like deathstryke is treated pretty poorly by the plot here seeing as shes you know kind of an important character who they never introduce properly. nightcrawler looks better in this movie than he does in the later ones but still not good.

last stand: ive already talked about the choice of angel & worthington industries as the villains in this one so i won't go over it again. i think its DEEPLY funny that scott disappears and wolverine finds his glasses (which he cannot live without) just lying around and doesn't think "hey i wonder what happened to cyclops" until jean is quite literally unbuckling his belt halfway through trying seduce him. why does no one in these films seem to give a fuck about what happens to cyclops he dies in the first 10 minutes of the movie and its never addressed. also prof x dies in this one and i dont remember how he comes back to life so what was that. also they fuck up bobbys characterization SOOOO bad like i know they didnt know he was gay and he is kind of a player but in the comics kitty uses him as a rebound then breaks up with him and then his younger self (teleported to the future from the 60s) is like "why arent you gay. i'm gay" and bobby is like "no i'm also gay. i just act straight because of irish catholic guilt". so having him cheat on rogue with kitty and pressure rogue into getting the mutation blocker thing so they can have sex is retroactively an insane plotline. sorry im bobby drakes number one fan and this is so fake. also beast is so hot in this movie. what? who said that. also the phoenix plotline sucks and also magneto was right to try and explode the factory or whatever

origins wolverine: INCREDIBLY funny movie serious excellent. completely unintentional in how funny it is but so enjoyable to watch. why was cyclops there? why was emma frost there? what is going on in this movie? why is wolverine naked all the damn time? why does he know the blob? why can he BEAT the blob? why is the blob in this movie? seriously what the fuck is going on in this movie? x-men origins wolverine does not have answers to these questions. its really great to see the awful cgi claws though. i liked that gambit was in this movie.

first class: i have a lot of questions on this one. why is hank here. why is mystique acting like a child when she should be over 70 years old at the least. why would they get my hopes up by putting banshee and moira in the same movie but then not give them a relationship. why the fuck is scott summers' younger brother here. however it does well by making you root for magneto and then being like "and everybody then teamed up with magneto because hes awesome and abandoned xavier except for hank because theyre both centrist democrats" like you know what. so true. i like how mags just starts drama constantly for no reason like why was he fucking w mystique like that... good for him i guess but hes so gay in this movie its not even funny. okay it is funny but only a little.

the wolverine: i fell asleep during this one so i don't know but it seemed weird and racist in many ways and wolverine was a complete bitch during it for NO reason as always. also its so funny to see him fail on screen with basic japanese when in the comics he gets mind wiped and regains the ability to speak japanese before he regains english like that guy is an r/whiteguyswithasianwives prodigy. i liked deathstryke in this movie the actress was very cool. why didnt wolverine take the deal to save his friend and not be immortal anymore when he fucking hates being immortal half the time like bro come on... i hate him sorry

days of future past: okay at this point they should have known bobby drake was gay. so why all that with kitty. also why blame MYSTIQUE for the creation of the sentinels dawg she had nothing to do with that in the comics. the sentinels were not purple enough OR big enough btw. also, where is rachel summers. you cant do days of future past without rachel summers. either way this was a pretty good movie. quicksilver was excellent.

apocalypse: guys. why is scott summers wearing raybans. here are some other questions i hate about this movie: why is cyke's backstory never properly discussed. why do they give cyke angel or bobby's personality. why does nightcrawler look so bad. why would apocalpse choose angel over literally anyone else. why is it never addressed that nightcrawler is mystique's son. why is psylocke here if theyre not going to do anything with her. why is xavier such an annoying liberal. why would they introduce a new magneto daughter when he already has like 3 to pick from. why dont hank and mystique just sort their shit out. why does mystique go to bat so hard for maggy. why does jean already have telepathic abilities when she and scott meet thus making the way they originally get together (one of the main reasons i give a fuck about their relationship) impossible. who is the girl with the yellow hoop earrings they hang out with. dazzler??? why does jean have the phoenix spirit in her if she hasnt died yet. why isnt storm in her home on the mountain at this point. why is moira not scottish. why introduce her son if theyre not going to do the moira son plotline. last but not least, why would they include any character in this movie who wasnt quicksilver when hes obviously the best character by a wide margin and all scenes that dont include him are basically worthless. otherwise i quite enjoyed it. i liked angels haircut and im so glad they FINALLY made xavier bald.

i will add my reviews of new mutants, dark phoenix, deadpool, etc. once i watch them

[katandsquad]

So I never really Post anything on here but I have some thoughts i just cant let go.

I really really loved the Watchmaker of Filigree Street books. I really loved all 3 of them

For christmas I got The Kingdoms and The half life of Valery K

I enjoyed The Kingdoms, even though it wasnt as good and the book focused too much on a weird kinda stalky romance imo

But i still liked it and the premise of the book was interesting

Few days ago i started to read the half life of Valery K and boy. I read chapter 7 and to be honest I dont know how anyone was able to read further after that. I checked all the 1 and 2 Star reviews on goodreads and most of them either finished the book or dropped after like 30-40%

How?

I didnt even manage to read 1/4 of the book

I really adore Natasha Pulleys writing and her ideas but the fuck did she think while writing this one?

I'm german, with polish ancestors (like great grand parents)

My grandparents lived through WW2

You cant make me like a character that has worked with/for fucking Josef Mengele

I felt absolutely sick when I read that name

I already didnt feel good after reading the title of the chapter, because i already knew where this was going to end.

You cant just mention the gruesome experiments that this Person did in such a casual way.

What the fuck is wrong with you.

And yes I know that Valery feels bad about it, but the way that scene is handled is poorly at best.

Shenkov telling him "you were only 19 and you were just following orders"

Alot of people """just followed orders"""" during WW2 but that doesnt make the shit they did any better

They are still guilty

And so is the main character of this book.

I feel so mad, sick and depressed because of this book.

I have never dropped a book/manga/comic because of it's questionable content before. I have read comics that made me feel bad but I was still able to finish them.

This book and specifically chapter 7 damaged me in some way. I had nightmares through the whole night.

I didn't dare to read the 5 and 4 Stars reviews on goodreads, but my sister did and i have one question

Are you people okay?

Most of the comments were something along the lines of "its such a good slow burn romance 😍"

Like excuse me??? ARE YOU PEOPLE OKAY???

This book feels like Natasha did barely any research on russian and german culture.

Didnt properly research anything regarding the cold war and ww2

I'm shocked and severely dissapointed in her and i'm not sure if i'm ever gonna touch a book of hers again.

[somelokivariant]

Writing skill or an interesting fucking plot? Ft the queen Margaret Atwood

I read the Handmaids tale for my gr 12 final (which was on my tbr for a while) and it low key sucked 🧍

Don't cancel me, the book wasn't b a d, I think it wasn't as good as it could've been.

The book felt dead. After I read it my mom was like "so what was it about" and im like gurl idek. There is no plot to summarize. It was a 300 page "day in the life" of a Handmaid (ig that's literally the title of the book-).

But you know how in grade three you learn the story arch with the conflict-climax-resolution? Atwood didn't follow that, (and I'm all for ditching rules for artistique purposes) but in this case it didn't do anything for the story.

Offred was right at the climax point, right in the smack of that dab, but because the entire book was at the same level of stakes, there was no stimulation and it fell flat.

Now ik we do get Offreds flashbacks, but I don't think they fully made the reader feel what we were supposed to. That contrast (between Gilead and the "before") that's supposed to intrigue us wasn't shown in an effective way. The mix of present (that was actually past because it was a tale, a retelling?) and the flashbacks just made things confusing. There were a couple times i was like, wait where are we actually? Where is offred physically rn??

That story arch is still in mind within the story, but it wasn't illustrated that clearly. It was like a faint idea behind the writing that didn't quite make it into the actual writing. (However this does show how good of an author Atwood is). The story telling was unorganized. It came off as a lot of yapping (listen I love yapping) but Atwood was writing to the point where the words lost their meaning. (Remember that this is all opinion guys. See side note from me is, poetic wordy classic writing is great, but when it's used properly. Writing like that is supposed to be a punch, it's supposed stand out. When you pull that move too much, it becomes dull and no longer strikes the reader. [Just like how the plot is so much climax that its dull too])

And this us where you could say the lack of order was supposed to represent Offred's state of mind and life and how out of control things became (and i'll say thats a totally valid point)

She coulve written about offered running away, her child getting stolen, and making it through the red centre whatever, and you would seen that increase, change and danger in her life.

The problem is Atwood has an INSANELY good plot. The world building was so good, and her characters were so complex and fleshed out. As a professional author 🤓☝️ I can tell so much thinking went in to building Gilead. But then she just didn't indulge as much as she could've.

She literally didn't do her own story justice.

See falling short on a movie coming from a book I understand, because they lose things all the time, but falling short on the book itself in the first place? The story had so much potential 😭.

When i was reading I think there were multiple parts where I thought she was making a point, but then she never reinforced it. Like she forgot talking abt that, she started an idea and never finished. (Again I'm sure some of y'all love that kind of writing, and love coming to your own conclusions on what the piece means). An example was early on in the book Offred talks about the white caps the handmaids wear, and how it blinds them and "it’s hard to look up, hard to get the full view, of the sky, of anything.” (34). And I was like Atwood better use this line, this better mean something later on for their character development. But then shE DIDNT, and it became more word fluff. If the book went on to have the handmaids look up, look at the sky, with optimism and hope, to get the full view and see how Gilead was corrupted, that shit would've been SO GOOD.

That's the level of shaping a tale i was expecting and I didn't get it.

Atwoods writing is very good. My teacher said shes very showy, hes right, she exploits how well she works with words, (which doeesnt always turn out to be a good thing, because she gets carried away). She's a yapper. I understand you have skill, can you direct it to the plot please? (/lightheartedly)

Someone asked bad writing + good story or good writing + bad story. I am would rather take bad writing + good story and I think this is an example of good writing + bad story

So as an author I think yes it's a very strong novel and writing. But as a reader I was so bored 😭. Atwood is a GREAT author and the Handmaids tale was a GREAT plot, I just didn't like the way she wrote it.

[ciaossu-imagines]

So one idea i will properly write out has just been going in my head and turning in there like a marinated rotissery chicken. However its p gory and gruesome and so i aill put it under a read more

So once again it has to do with my babes the unseen varia. In fact its about Lorenzo and what shit Bel put him through. This happens p shortly after he joined maybe a year or half a year befoee the ring battles. So he is around 17-18.

Lorenzo even as a new recruit showed himself to be formidable. He is quick on his feet, incredibly competent and confident to boot. The boy already shows that he will go far in the organisation and even manages to make some pals in he storm division.

And of course that is something that Belphegor does not particularly like. At first he didnt think much about it. Its just another guy under his command. But then he shows incredible leadership skills when a mission goes a tad bit awry. Even Squalo mentions how he is impressed and that doesnt happen often.

Belphegor isnt in any form threatened by Lor as a fighter. He believes himself to still be vastly superior. But Lorenzo does work. He does the boring and tedious paoerwork, he cares for his coworkers and the teams he is in, he just does the things that Belphegor refuses or just doesnt WANT to do. Bel is lazy. He only does what he wants to do in the way he wants to do it. And ir has been a headache to others. and before Lorenzo this wasn't an issue. Bel was the most capable storm they had! But just a year ago two new recruirs joined. Sergey and Leonard. And Leo was clearly stronger physifally than Lussuria or Levi. However the reason he wasn't instantly promoted was because he was just not very capable as a leader. Levi was still the best for the position of their lightning guardian, no matter if Leo was physically stronger or not.

So if there comes a guy, who is not just strong in his own right, but also capable of being in a leadership position-- that's when things get a bit tricky for Bel. But its not like he has no ways of keeping his men in line. Or himself entertained.

So for a week he puts harsh pressure and psychological drwad onto one of his storms that Lorenzo is getting along with quite well. Bel doesnt even remember the guys name but he makes him aware of how death is right around the corner. Or even something worse. The storm division is not a daycare after all and Bel has his moods. If he doesnt keep up the good work to Bels satisfaction, he might become a bit of target practise. And it breaks the poor guy. The absolute existential fear sets into his bones. That is exactly what Bel wanted.

So one day he asks Lorenzo and that guy to a more secluded area of the yard. He doesnt notice Leo coming by by accident on his break. He looks at his two guys and snickers before he explains himself.

He is bored. And he wants to test them both. Ya know? Just for funsies~.

Lorenzo doesnt know what to do at first but rhen he actually defies Bel.

"Sir, I don't think having your men engage in spontaneous murder of each other is such a good i--"

But he doesnt even get to finish as he quickly dodges an attack from the other. He tries to calm his friend down but the other is out of it, completely taken by panic nd a need for survival that he lunges at Lorenzo and it comes to a fight between them. Lorenzo tries all he can to incapacitate the other so the fight ends more or less painless, but Bel is in the guys head, spurring him on, through a whole week of manipulation. And it comes as it has to evenrually.

The young man lunges again at Lorenzo, who keeps his knife up in defense and just feels metal hit leather and then flesh as blood drips onto Lorenzo. He is on his back with the body growing limp on top of him. Lorenzo manages to push the body off of him, pulling the knife out in the process and breathing heavily as he comes down from the adrenalin rush. His body is shaking and he needs a moment before his eyes fall onto his former friend. He checks hos pulse.

...

....

.....

Nothing.

He's dead.

The realisation hits Lorenzo like a truck and he barely hears the slow clapping of hands before the voice he comes to hate most rings in his ears.

"Good job~!" he hears in emglish before its follow up in italian

"Looks like the newbie got some actual skill!"

Lorenzo is frozen in place.

Its not like he has never killed anyone. Far from it. But the thought rhat his superior just for shira and giggles had them fight to the death?

He can feel a hand on his shoulder and a squeeze, more menacing than comforting.

"Just so you know: I will always be on top, shishishi~... If you as much as think of dethroning me, I will annihilate you~"

He lifts himself up ahain, snickering, hands in his pockets and shoots Leo a glance who jolts together. Bel lays a finger against his lips as a silent threat and then leaves.

This incidents shakes Lorenzo, but ita not enough to truly break his resolve. That comes at another point. During a mission of which he is the leader, the mission gos awry because one of their newest recruits, a young 16 year old boys nerves colapse. He wants to leave, no money in the world is worth this stress and torrure. Lorenzo has pity on the young storm. He has been there 3 days only, he barely made it in and shouldnt even be on mission yet. He wants to go back to his family, he shakes and cries. So Lorenzo promises him to take the fall and get him out of there.

But Bel cultivates an atmosphere of betrayal. Another storm snitches to Belphegor what happened, for some favor points with the storm officer and the young boy gets stabbed in the kidney and thrown onto the streets. Can't have any of his men fail at missions after all~

And Lorenzo snaps. He manages to track down whoever snitched on them and beats him to a pulp until the guy begs for Lorenzo to stop. But by then its too late. He kills the man. And at that point realizes that he has already lost to Belphegors mind games. He can not make friends. He can not trust anyone. He HAS to be alone to make sure nobody else gets dragged into their power struggle.

Nobody outside of the storm dicision teuly knows the extend of Belphegors torture and manipulation. The division is a bunch of egocentric maniacs out for their own gain, because teamwork never pays out. They betray each other constantly and are put in small batrles against each other for Bels own amusement. People are killed off for just being annoying or in the way. Nobody helps each other.

It gives the storm division a bad reputation and puts Lorenzo under constant stress that nobody else understands, just because he believes he has to prove that he can still rise to the rop without giving into these stupid games, even though he has already lost to them.

It's a battle he can not win.

But he will be damned if he doesnt try.

[wollfling]

ooh are you going to play the bloodborne dlc as well? 👁

Yes!! I'm currently playing on a borrowed game/system that I'm not sure has the dlc 🤔 but after I beat the game, my bf and I are going to play together and he has the dlc! I heard the hardest content is in it? but I don't actually know much more details as I've been doing my best not to look too much stuff up. But I'm curious, I think on a wiki page I seen a weapon that's only in dlc, so I'm hoping for wearable items too eheheh...

[imfluentinfangirlandgay]

Surprise Adoption - Pt 3

Ingo held the crying Dawn in his arms, considering his options. He decided right then and there. She would stay with him and Emmet for the time being.

Word Count: ~4100

Wow guys, how come i let you have 2 new chapters???

pile in for your aunt elesa content, come get yall juice

The next morning, Ingo sent a quick message to the office first thing and then a quick text to Elesa. After a moment of thought, their uncle, as well. Drayden had adopted Iris, after all, and he would likely have some ideas as to how to properly care for a teenage girl. Finished, Ingo went to the kitchen and prepared two cups of coffee, one for himself and one for Emmet, whenever he awoke. Ingo had left the other two on the couch, still asleep. Ingo went to his and Emmet’s room, grabbing a Pokeball to let out some company. Chandelure blazed to life, happily chiming at him.

“Hush, Chandie, we have a passenger who will be staying with us for a while. She and Emmet are both asleep still,” he murmured to her as quietly as his voice would allow (which was not very quiet, but he kept the door closed). Then he reentered the kitchen, scrolling through the morning reports that the subway sent to him as he waited for the other two to awaken. He sipped the drink as a message pinged in for him.

Static Sister: who is it???? Im happy to help a sister out but how many girls do you and E know???

Me: its a girl i knew in hisui. Her mother recently passed and she has no other family. She appointed me as her uncle. How do we get the station prepared for her?

Static Sister is typing…

Static Sister: EXCUSE ME?

Static Sister: YOU JUST ADOPTED A KID OUT OF NO WHERE???

Static Sister: AND YOU DIDNT THINK TO TELL ME I WAS AN AUNT??

Me: as I told E, it simply did not come up. Theres still a lot of hisui left that i havent discussed. She showed up unexpectedly at the station last night crying and could not sleep alone. I am not well acquainted with the needs of children and i want to make her feel welcome

Static Sister: give me an hour im coming over to meet my niece :)

Static Sister: you said she has no family left? Like at all?

Me: that is what she told me. Me and E are taking the day off to stay home with her

Static Sister: did you tell your uncle?? He might have some ideas

Me: yes, he has not read the message yet. He is likely getting ready for the day as well

Me: do not overwhelm her when you get here. She is still recovering. It is a fresh wound

Static Sister: <3

Ingo put down his phone, finishing off the coffee in one scalding gulp and hurriedly getting dressed. Chandelure followed him, pausing at the living room and looking in upon the other two figures. She gave a soft chime as she changed directions, opting to float above the two. Ingo dressed quickly, returning to the main room, surprised to find Chandelure in a spot that was not directly above him. Ever since his return, she had hardly ever parted from him, always within reaching distance of his person. She was floating just a little above the two, watching them intently. The ghost nuzzled into Dawn’s lap, flaring her ghostly fire just a little brighter, making the area a little warmer. Dawn sighed in her sleep.

Ingo returned to the kitchen, rinsing out his mug, before returning to the couch and sitting back down on Dawn’s other side. Emmet was beginning to drool onto his own arm. Ingo poked him. “Whu- I am Emmet?” he asked as he awoke. Ingo put a finger to his lips, pointing at Dawn. Emmet nodded sluggishly, yawning. Ingo poked him again, moving his hands in Unovan sign language.

Elesa coming in one hour. Made coffee. Get ready. Emmet simply nodded again, patting Chandelure and gently disentangling himself from Dawn, padding into the kitchen. The action made Dawn lightly stir. Ingo hated to wake her, but she should have some warning before his surrogate sister barged in the door. He gently tapped her shoulder. “Dawn. Dawn, wake up,” he kept his voice to the lowest possible decibel he could muster. Her eyes fluttered open, mildly confused as she took in her surroundings.

“Uncle Ingo?”

“Good morning, Dawn. We have a visitor arriving in an hour, and I wished to give you some forewarning. It is a long-time friend of ours, who we call our sister. She is coming over to say hello.” Dawn’s eyebrows crinkled as she listened to him. “She is very nice, I promise. She has a keen interest in you, in fact. She told me off for not telling her she had a niece.” Dawn smiled a little at that. Chandelure must have shifted in her lap, as she suddenly whipped her head down to the Pokemon.

“Wh-what Pokemon is this?”

“This is my partner, Chandelure. She took an interest in you this morning, as well. She has been keeping you warm.” Chandelure nuzzled the girl’s stomach, chiming soothingly at her.

Dawn’s eyes widened. “This is the partner you talked about in Hisui! The one who knew flames well!”

“Indeed she is,” Ingo agreed, stroking the ghost in the girl’s lap. “She has hardly left my side since my return to Unova. She can sense souls and feelings. She says that mine and Emmet’s souls are incredibly similar, and that is how she located me here again.” Chandelure floated up and off of Dawn, rubbing her glass body against Ingo’s cheek, making him chuckle. “Chandie, I already fixed my hair this morning,” he scolded, though the statement held no ill will to it. “Elesa will be at the station in forty-five minutes. I informed her not to be too overbearing but she is a character.”

“What’s she like?” Dawn leaned into Ingo, looking up at him with her dark eyes. The fact that she was talking and inquisitive was a very good sign.

“Me and Emmet met her many years ago, during grade school. She became our best friend early on. She is outgoing, silly, and smart. You remind me a lot of her, in fact,” Ingo said, ruffling her hair a little. “She likes bad puns. She is the Electric-type Gym Leader of Nimbasa City and she is a model in her off-time, but she still makes time to see us every week or so.” Dawn nuzzled into his shirt.

“Do you think she’ll like me?” Something in Dawn’s voice changed.

“Oh, I know she will adore you. She has been bugging me and Emmet to see girls for years to have someone to talk to.” Ingo rolled his eyes. “All in good fun, however. She knows neither me nor Emmet are interested in that kind of thing.”

“Getting married?”

“Precisely. Neither of us have ever had an interest. All we need is the Subway and each other. Although,” he made sure to add, “we are more than happy to add others to our two-car train. Emmet has been curious about you since I first mentioned you. He wishes to face you in a Pokemon battle sometime.”

“Did you tell him that I adopted you as an uncle?”

“I left that part out, mostly to mess with him. Seeing his face when you referred to me as such was priceless.”

“So… is it okay if I start calling him that, too? I don’t want to step on any toes…”

Ingo looked down at the girl, the slightest of smirks crossing his features. “As soon as he realized that you had taken me on as an uncle, he started to see you as his niece. I daresay you would have a hard time convincing him otherwise.” Dawn giggled. Emmet shuffled into the room, still wearing his train-patterned sweatpants and now some plush slippers that looked like little 1800s steam engines, yawning as he sipped his coffee.

“I am Emmet. I heard my name.”

Dawn snorted when she saw the slippers. “Do you both have a pair of those?”

“Matching ones,” Ingo affirmed. Dawn let off a smile, the first one Ingo had seen since she had first appeared yesterday. He hoped he got to see it again.

“I’m gonna go get dressed. What did you say her name was? Who was coming over?”

“Elesa,” both twins responded in unison.

“Elesa…” Dawn tried the name for herself, going back to the bedroom she had left her stuff in. Emmet looked over at him, sipping his coffee. He seemed to be slowly waking up.

“What were you talking about?”

“Elesa. I informed her not to be too rowdy, but you know how she gets sometimes…” Emmet nodded, taking a larger drink as he receded into the bedroom, presumably to dress himself. Ingo fixed the cuffs on his shirt, ensuring that it was still centered. Then he checked his phone, Chandelure still twinkling above his head.

Static Sister (1 unread message)

Static Sister: what did you say her name was?

Me: Dawn

Ingo tapped on a different notification.

Drayden (2 unread messages)

Drayden: Ingo! Good to hear from you.

Drayden: I could give you some tips if you need. May I ask what for?

Me: In hisui, there was a young girl that appointed me as her uncle. She returned to the present time last week and found that her mother had passed on, leaving her with no family. Me and E have opened our home to her in the meantime. Neither of us know now to care for a child long-term

Drayden: I see, I am very sorry to hear that for her. How old is she?

Me: 15. I believe if my memory is correct, she is one year younger than Iris

Drayden: I could bring Iris with me sometime and let them get acquainted if possible! I’m sure she would love to have a cousin close in age and we could do some girl shopping

Me: Elesa is already on her way. I am sure we will get some ‘girl shopping’ done. I just want to ensure she feels welcome in our home

Drayden: of course. Let me know when is a good time for you. Maybe this weekend. Let the poor dear get settled in a little bit

Drayden: what is my new niece’s name? Where is she from?

Me: Dawn, from the Sinnoh region. She showed up unexpectedly last night at the subway, crying

Drayden: you say Dawn?

Drayden: what does she look like?

Me: long dark hair, dark eyes, she arrived yesterday wearing a pink cap and skirt

Drayden: Ingo

Drayden: I believe that is the Champion of Sinnoh

Drayden: she reappeared after nearly a year of absence and disappeared again less than a week later

Drayden: Cynthia and the Sinnoh Elite Four are looking everywhere for her

Ingo’s eyebrows raised. He did not know what to do with that information

Me: I will converse with her about it, we have not talked much since she arrived. The passing of her mother is still very fresh. I will still leave the offer open to her. If she wishes to stay, me and E have already agreed she is more than welcome.

Drayden: just make sure to inform someone that she is safe. I got a message from Sinnoh yesterday that she was missing again and they are frantic

Me: is it possible to say that she is safe, but not disclose her location? If she wanted people to know where she was, she would have said something

Drayden: I am unsure, but I will do my best. Can you make sure that she is, in fact, the Champion of Sinnoh?

Me: I can ensure it as long as you do not disclose her location. She seems exhausted. I believe she needs some time away to simply be a child

Drayden: understood. I would love to meet her soon, assuming she is up for company

Me: we will play it by ear

Dawn re-entered the living room, wearing the same outfit as yesterday, sitting on the couch by Ingo. She leaned into him, sagging into his side. He wrapped an arm around her shoulders. Neither spoke as Ingo finished off his last message to Drayden, checking to see if Elesa had said anything back. Ingo set down his phone, gesturing to Chandelure. She came to him, relishing the pets he gave her.

“Is there anyone else I will have to talk to today?”

“Not unless you want to. The only other close family we have is our Uncle Drayden, the Dragon-type Gym Leader in Unova, and his adopted daughter, Iris, the current Champion of Unova. She also has an affinity for dragons. She is around your age, in fact.”

Dawn nodded, not looking at Ingo. “Hmmm.” Ingo pulled her in a little closer, tapping mindlessly with his foot. “All your family sounds like really strong Trainers.”

“Yes. Pokemon battling is something we all hold dear to us, in different ways. Me and Emmet enjoy the competitive aspect of it. Iris enjoys learning about as many Pokemon as she can. Drayden and Elesa have specialized in one particular type. But we are all unified by our love of the creatures.” Emmet entered the room last, a Joltik now taking up residence on his shoulder. He wore the exact same thing as Ingo, unsurprisingly. Emmet sat down beside Dawn, laying his arm over her other shoulder and pulling out his phone.

“Can I battle you all some day?”

“I believe you would have to ask them, but I can guarantee you everyone would love to see what your team has in store. Did you leave your Hisui team back in time?”

“I- yeah, I didn’t think they should come. Except my Samurott. I have her still. She really wanted to come with me.” Ingo nodded, more to himself than anything. “The rest is my team from the present day. And I - uh - have a bit of a confession to make.” Dawn lowered her head, not allowing either twin to see her face. Emmet put his phone down, his attention on her. “I’m kind of the current Champion of Sinnoh. I left again without telling anyone. As soon as I got back there was just so much and so many people asking questions and then I found out about my mom and I know they’re probably looking for me b-but I just couldn’t take it-”

“Dawn,” Ingo broke in. Dawn was beginning to shake violently, her breath coming in gasps. “It is alright. You don’t have to explain yourself.”

“I am Emmet. Champion is a tough position.”

“Drayden had his suspicions that you were the Champion, in fact, but I told him not to disclose your location to anyone. He wishes to let Cynthia know that you are in a safe location, but that you do not want to be found. You are in a tough situation right now, especially for one so young. We will keep you away from the public eye as long as you need to be. Is it alright if I tell him to inform the higher-ups?” Dawn merely nodded, sinking into the couch. Emmet patted her shoulder. “I promise you that we will not tell anyone where you are stationed without your consent. We said you are welcome here as long as you’d like and we meant it.”

“I am Emmet. My brother is correct.” Dawn giggled a little at his robotic tone.

“Now, let us all get cleaned up. Elesa should be here any minute.” Dawn nodded, fleeing to the bathroom. Ingo and Emmet looked at each other. Emmet signed, Champion?

Yes. Drayden guessed it first. Ingo didn’t need to understand sign to know what Emmet’s next thought was going to be. His eyes were glittering with excitement.

Want to battle her. Strong Trainer. Ingo chuckled quietly as the bathroom door opened, revealing Dawn again, this time her face cleaned and looking better.

“Did you want anything to eat, Dawn? We have some toast if you would like breakfast.”

“Did you guys eat yet?”

“I am Emmet. We typically do not eat breakfast.”

“You should! It’s important! Here, we’re all having toast, coffee isn’t a meal.” Dawn dragged the two twins off the couch and had Emmet show her where the bread and butter resided, insisting that she could make the three of them toast. She forced the twins into chairs in the kitchen, within minutes giving each of them two slices of buttered toast. She sat down with her own prize and dug in, the brothers making eye contact with each other as they began to eat. Dawn seemed happy with herself. They mostly just indulged in the food to make Dawn happy, and it seemed to work. She smiled again, watching the two take bites of the food she’d given them. Emmet was grinning ear to ear.

A knock on the door. Emmet sprang up, calling “I am Emmet!” as he left the kitchen to let Elesa in.

“I would like to see the baby.” Ingo snorted so harshly he nearly coughed out the bite of toast he had just taken. Elesa entered behind Emmet, wearing her fluffy yellow coat today with a black jumpsuit and her trademark headphones. Emolga, nestled in her coat, chittered happily at the brothers, taking flight to go say hello to Ingo. Elesa stood in the doorway, taking in Dawn, who waved awkwardly.

“Hey, aren’t you the Champion of Sinnoh?” Elesa asked immediately. Dawn recoiled in her chair.

“Dawn is the Champion, and I have already discussed this with Drayden. Dawn wishes to keep her location a secret for now, as she does not want to deal with the press at the given moment, and we are fulfilling her wishes. Sinnoh will be notified that she is in safe hands, but that she is not yet ready to return to her full responsibilities yet.” Ingo reached out and put a comforting hand on her shoulder, giving it a squeeze. She slightly unfolded as Elesa nodded.

“Fair enough. Anyway, I’m Elesa, the electric Gym Leader and the surrogate sister of these two dorks. Ingo said you sent him back to Unova so thank you for that, really. I like having him around.” She grinned, walking up to the table and patting Ingo on the shoulder. “Wait, you guys are actually eating breakfast? I don’t think I’ve seen that since we were all in school together.”

“I am Emmet. Dawn made us breakfast.” Emmet smiled as Dawn’s face turned a little red.

“Geez, at this rate, she may actually make you guys wear something that's not formal wear every single day. Or make you take a day off once in a blue moon. The possibilities are endless.”

“We take days off!”

“Sundays don’t count, Ingo. More than one day a week.” Ingo and Emmet rolled their eyes in unison, making Elesa laugh. Dawn giggled shyly. “So, I came over to give you two some advice on how to make the place a bit more welcoming to a female, yeah? Cause I’m not gonna lie, this screams ‘bachelor pad’ if I ever saw it.”

“You know neither of us are interested in that kind of thing.”

“Yeah, I know, I’m just pulling your leg. What kinds of things are you interested in, Dawn?” Elesa sat at the table, her Emolga now sniffing at Dawn inquisitively. Dawn pulled off her cap, allowing the Pokemon to climb into her hair, making it staticy.

“Well, before I went on my Pokemon journey, I would play video games a lot and I played with my best friend, Barry. We liked to play tag and… other things.” Her voice quieted, her mannerisms becoming more subdued. Emmet must have noticed, as he locked eyes with Ingo.

“Oh that’s cool, I play video games too! What kinds do you like to play? If I ever get to play with the twins, its usually some variation of a racing game. I beat them every time.”

“I won last time.”

“And I have won before!”

“Ingo, you won one time over the last several years. Emmet, you got lucky a few times.”

“I’ve been practicing since you’ve been away. I’m getting better.”

“And yet neither of you can drive a normal, everyday car.” Elesa looked at Dawn. “These two can drive all sorts of trains, boats, and even different aircraft, but not a freaking car. It’s the weirdest thing.” She got two stink-eyes but Dawn smiled, just a little. A good sign, Ingo noted.

“I like adventure games and puzzles. Legend of Zorua kind of stuff.” Elesa raised her eyebrows.

“Favorite video game of all time?”

Dawn thought about it for a moment. “The last thing I remember playing was Spinarak-Man and I liked Staryu Valley. It’s nice and relaxing.”

“I have Staryu Valley, we should co-op sometime!”

“I uh, don’t have my computer here,” Dawn admitted.

“That’s okay! If you remember your log in stuff we can get you set up here.” The two began talking about the games they liked to play, Ingo trying to take mental notes.

After a few minutes of this, Emmet piped up, “What kind of Pokemon do you have?” The girls paused in their conversation, looking at him.

“You have a one-track mind, Emmet,” Elesa retorted, displeased at having been interrupted.

“Oh, I haven’t shown anyone my team in awhile,” Dawn realized. She pulled some Pokeballs out of her bag. “I won’t pull them all out here, but I did promise Kingu that I would let him know when I was somewhere safe. He’s my partner.” She tossed a ball, a beam of light materializing into an Empoleon. It looked around the room for a moment, eyeing the other people in the room before protectively worming its way in front of Dawn. “Hey, buddy, I’m okay! These are friends!” It stopped trying to block her from view, instead being goaded into standing at her side. It chirped, nosing at her face in concern. “I’m doing better, buddy, I promise. This is the one I was telling you about before, Uncle Ingo, his brother, Uncle Emmet, and their sister, Aunt Elesa.” Emmet perked up in his seat, his hands flapping excitedly as his face melted into a grin at the term of endearment Dawn had used. Elesa’s face split into a massive smile.

“Aww, you’re gonna get me all teary-eyed soon, kiddo.” Emolga and Chandelure floated closer to Empoleon, chiming and chirping, wanting a better look at it. The four of them continued conversing about light topics for a good while. The hours changed, the sun grazing past their building and slowly making its trek back towards the horizon. Elesa ordered lunch from a place nearby that they all partook in, the sun still creeping its way down slowly. It wasn’t until around 4 pm that they decided to change their positioning.

“Whaddaya say sometime we get some new decor and clothes for you? My fashion team would have a fun time with you, I think. I can get those orders in for a new set of coats for you two while I’m at it,” Elesa added, nodding at the two brothers. “Maybe I could bring over my games and we could have a family game night. I’d like to see how competent you are at Smash.” Dawn smirked.

“Oh, you’re going down.”

“That’s what I like to hear!” Dawn and Elesa shook on it, a promise for the future.

“Well, guys, I should get going, but I’ll see you sometime soon. Make sure to keep these dorks fed while I’m gone. They forget to eat.” She reached out and ruffled both of the twin’s hair at once, making them both cry out in indignation and shock. She pulled back and pointed a finger-gun at each, as if holding them back. They each stood and finger-gunned her in response, their bangs in their eyes and loose strands flying everywhere. They stood like that for a minute until Elesa shouted “Draw!” and she shot forward, barreling into the two of them. Her arms looped around them, giving them a tight hug. “I’ll see you guys around, trying not to burn anything in the meantime.”

The twins returned the hug, meeting gazes over her head. Emmet grinned mischievously. Both of them brough one hand up behind Elesa’s head as she pulled away from them, each one ruffing up one side of her hair and then grabbing her jacket and flipping it over her head. “Hey, not fair! You ganged up on me!” She made sure to lift the jacket over her headphones as she gave them a dirty look. Both of them were laughing.

“I am Emmet. We will see you soon, Elesa.”

“Yes, we will see you around this station in the coming days, I am sure.” Elesa turned, waving as she left the kitchen, Emolga burying itself back in her jacket.

“Bye, Aunt Elesa!” Dawn called. Ingo heard Elesa’s footsteps pause briefly and then a quiet “yes!” as the door opened and shut, indicating that she had gone.

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[karlheinz-sama]

If you get this, answer with 3 random facts about yourself and send it to the last 7 blogs in your notifications, anonymously or not! Let's get to know the person behind the blog!

icl i wanted to answer this as karl but i remembered some funny stories so yh

my great grandmother, so my mothers grandmother was a great woman. i mean she slayed, im talking 1920s housewife who lives on the border of the slums dealing with every bullshit possible this was before the partition of india pakistan. she dealt with insane amounts of racism, she lived through the partition, then the independence war from bangladesh because we live sea side ish. she lost one husband left with my grandfather, she married again and fought against every attempt of ostracisation her community threw at her, then she got married again. a love marriage too. and she live she really did to the best of her abilities both her sons studied till class 12, one even attempted college. she got mad at people, once she dragged a woman by her hair in our lawn and beat her with a sandal, other times she was so happy when we finally got a movie thing ( im not quite sure if it was a projector) in the community that she bought everyone a saree told their husbands to fuck off and do the house work because she wanted to watch a movie with her friends. she made homemade facials, and took meticulous care of her hair oiling it every day, she taught my grandmother and my mother all her favourite recipes. she refused to go a day without wearing gold because it was a bad sign , whether it be a thin necklace or heavy 9 carat earrings that covered her entire ears.

then there was her second son, my step- grandfather who wrote erotic letter for money. fun story okay. im talking top of his class, he's like smart asf he reads indian, persian, english AND french literature. all self taught, and one day his friends like i wanna write a romantic letter to my gf so he consolidates my step-grandpa for some writing tip and my s-grandpa writes him some next level french/hindi love letter for lunch money. his fame grows there are boys paying left and right and it finally happens someone asks him to letter sext a gal. and he does he does it so well the seniors are coming to him for help. but then remember still the mid 90s sex and love is very taboo. one of his (muslim) friends runs away with his (hindu) gf and her father finds the letters he storms into the school and find out my step-grandpa's writing matches with the letter and he gets the living fuckery beat out of him. eventually, he does graduate, but he's so smart that even though his family is beyond disappointed, i mean they won't even look or talk to him, he's given money to go over to the next town my train and take an exam to get into college he rides the train halfway and gets off at a city where he goes to watch a projection of a french burlesque club idk what made him go, he liked the arts, music, literature his parents never understood why this meant he had to like the taboo parts of these things. anyways he shows up to his exam late but early enough to be allowed in. finishes all 3 exams and falls asleep with 20-25 mins to go. he came out with the highest score in the state. still got his ass beat when he came home.

anyways the reason i found out about him was i woke up to my mum crying in the middle of the night in the corner of my room, and i was confused to what was going on. when she finally showed me my iPad where i found reiji x yui smut fanfic still open on a tab. and that's the day 11 year old me found out how taboo the whole sex thing was in the family, they didnt look at my step- grandpa the same for the next 35 years. until he ended up paralysed and bedridden but he still wasn't allowed to see his nieces and nephews properly cuz they thought he was a creep now.