#but ag dolls feel much more like a companion

[echidnana]

random but one thing we love about american girl dolls is that they aren't super skinny. like how most other dolls like barbie dolls have an impossible body type but ag dolls just sort of feel Normal

[hoshigray]

𝐋𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐓𝐡𝐲 𝐃𝐞𝐦𝐨𝐧 𝐍𝐞𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐛𝐨𝐫! | fushiguro tōji

𝐒𝐲𝐧𝐨𝐩𝐬𝐢𝐬: Not only are you drunk on a Friday night, but you’re a drunk, closeted succubus who is, unfortunately, under the care of the hot neighbor under your roof! Would you ruin the mood if he found out about your little secret? You don’t even wanna know!

𝐂𝐨��𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐬: Toji x afab/fem! succubus reader - explicit content; minors DNI - modern au! reader + Toji are neighbors - age difference; reader is in late-20s + Toji is mid/late 40s - crushing/mutual pining - drug/alcohol usage - fingering (f! receiving) - oral (f! + m! receiving) - clitoral play (swiping) - Daddy kink - sqǔitïng - anal play (m! receiving) - 69 + backshots + spooning + cowgirl positions - unprotected sex (psa: wrap it up, or get tf up) - creampies - praise kink - pet names (baby, doll, dollface, good girl, mama, princess, sweetie) - implied marathon sex - mention of drool/spit, tears, and cum - not proofread; will do l8r.

𝐖𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐂𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 7.8k

𝐀𝐮𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐫'𝐬 𝐍𝐨𝐭𝐞𝐬: pulled this story out of my ass; I literally spent a whole single DAY dedicating to writing it. please enjoy, and tysm for 11.9k loveliesss ☆ love and appreciate u all !!

“…shit.”

There’s no way.

“Shit, shit, shit, shit—”

Of all days for this to happen.

“Oh, my fucking God, not tonight!!”

Tonight was already an eventful night, with the full moon shining brighter than the stars. Life has put you so fast in a whirlwind that you can’t recall the last time you permitted your body to unwind. Can you blame yourself, though? From moving to a new neighborhood and scoring a new job, things have kept you undeniably busy for the past few months. And not too mention,  it’s your fault for being a bit of a hermit and lacking a drive for social interaction. 

That’s precisely why your old college besties – Shoko, Utahime, and Yuki – pulled you out of your hideyhole and encouraged you to join them this Friday night to have some fun! “C’mo~n, lighten up! No more thinking about work or whatever; have some fun!” “Yeah, y’know you’re my biggest drinking buddy. Now, hurry up and share this cocktail with me!” The ladies pressure you to relax and enjoy the start of the weekend with some good drinks and delicious food. And, you hate to admit, it worked like a charm – the longer the hours went, the more you felt free as if all the weight holding you down had been lifted.

The only problem is, like all good things, that it had to end and that you had to go home. Now check this out: 1) you left your car at home because, again, you were rigorously dragged out of your abode by your college companions. 2) You were all pretty much drunk, enough for neither one of you to drive on the road. And 3) you guys are in the city, and catching a lift is not only a gamble but SUPER expensive! Guess that’s what you get for choosing a Friday night to free-ball.

However, when hope was lost, and you wouldn’t be in the comfort of your bed tonight, you received a text on your phone, and you could practically hear the angels sing in the heavens above!

Recent Message from: Neighbor Fushiguro

Yo. You home? I’m out in the city picking up stuff for the house. Need anything?

Thank God for neighbors, am I right? The chances of someone you know being within the same vicinity of you may be low, but never zero! Did you feel bad that you texted back saying you needed a ride back to your house? Sure. Did you feel extra bad when you asked a huge favor for him to drop your friends off at the nearest hotel? …Yeah. 

But luckily, he didn’t seem to mind. The only thing you had to endure was him teasing you about your little outing (with the help of your friends in the back of his truck) and your tipsy persona. “Never took you fr’ one who drinks.” He scoffs while putting you down on your couch after slinging you over his shoulder because you complained about your feet hurting. Damn heels! “Neither one who gets drunk.”

“It wasn’t my fauuu~lt,” you whine with a significant stretch while your neighbor roams around. “My fwiends, they forced me to–hic–to do it…”

“Mm, do your ‘fwiends’ always push you over to do things?” He shouts from the kitchen; you can hear cabinets opening and closing. 

“When you’re the youngest of the group, they do.”

“Well, maybe I gotta get to know ‘em so they can push you into goin’ out more. And maybe you can quit avoidin’ me when I invite you over.”

“I don’t try to avoid you!” You sprout defensively. “And quit teasing me, Toji! You’re supposed’ta be on my side; I’m the victim here.”

“Yeah, yeah, whatever ya say.” Heavy footsteps draw nearer to where you are, and your heavy eyelids open to see a hand stretching towards you with a glass of water. “I’m here takin’ care of ya now, aren’t I, lil’ victim?”

A smile pulls your lips as you take the glass. “Thank you,” you express before a sip, and your neighbor lifts your feet to sit on the cushion beside you. 

“Y’re welcome,” he places your legs on his lap, grabbing the remote to turn on the television. 

You haven’t been in this neighborhood long enough to say you have friends. Don’t get it wrong; everyone you contacted has been lovely and friendly, and some have opted to help with your move! But aside from the casual greetings in the morning or the nods of acknowledgment, you barely know people who scratch the surface of acquaintanceship. Not to mention, it’s your fault for being a bit of a hermit. 

…But, there is one neighbor you could say you’re pretty close with. Someone nice. Someone dependable…Someone attractive that you’re on a mission not to stare too much.

Toji Fushiguro lives two houses down from you across the street. Remember I mentioned you had people assist with your move? This widowed, middle-aged man was one of the nice handymen who aided you and your friends with your boxes and heavy furniture. You remember it like yesterday, seeing this brawny man stroll up your driveway on the sunniest day of June. You nearly mistook him for an Olympic athlete. 

“So, y’re the one movin’ ‘round here?” The calm baritone of his voice was unforced. “Nice to know there’s a cute face on the newbie. Need any help?” It’s how he asked – so sultry and alluring you almost spaced out before nodding absentmindedly to his request for aid, hoping he didn’t notice you watch how the scar of his lip moved as he spoke. “Welcome to the neighb’rhood, kid.” Rarely do you have butterflies running amok in the pits of your guts, but they were challenging to deal with that day. 

And it doesn’t get any better from that day forward. No matter how hard you wished not to run into this immediate crush of yours, he would somehow wheedle his way into your path. It started slow, exchanging hellos or good mornings whenever he left for work or you took the garbage out. Then came the “Want me to do y’r lawn fr’ ya?” or the “House down the street’s havin’ a little barbecue, wanna get to know people?” You thought moving away from the busy city life would die things down. However, Toji making your head race every chance he gets wasn’t a move you could envisage. Think about how you felt the day he asked for your number to keep in contact “fr’ emergencies…or if ya need anythin’, shoot me a call,” how your heart jumped to your throat! Oh, the girls never stopped teasing you when you told…

Nonetheless, you can’t deny how much help he’s been. Well, outside of that, just being a great neighbor all around. Besides being an absolute succor, he’s an outlet you can come to for anything. Whether for the house, the community, or just personal conversations, Toji’s someone you can admitlingly say you’d depend on. With trust built from day one, sharing pieces of yourselves to break down barriers, it’s safe to say that he is undoubtedly a friend who made your decision to move a worthy risk.

…Yet, what’s even more risky is being alone with him, something you do everything you can to avoid. Why? Look at him! Would you trust yourself to be anywhere with this man alone? Of course not! This is why tonight is the riskiest night you’ve ever bestowed upon your drunk self.

“You got somthin’ to say?”

“Huh?” You perk to reality, anxiousness filling you once you realize you had been staring at the man. “N-No, I’m sorry.”

He stifles a snort, grabbing your feet to massage them from the pain. “Oh, wanna act quiet. You were all bubbly in the passenger seat with y’re friends. Now y’re all shy because y’re stuck with me, huh?”

“T-That’s not true!” A lie; he was right on the mark. Your heart has been beating nonstop once he sat next to you. “It’s just that…I’m sorry for making you drive and pick me and the girls up.”

“Nah, don’t apologize,” his focus is on your feet as he kneads and rubs the sole of your foot. “Told ya I was around the area doing some shoppin’, so pickin’ ya up on my way back was easy.”

You take another sip of your water. “Shopping?” 

“Mm, my kids are down here for the weekend, so I had to go out fr’ a bit and grab shit fr’ my daughter.” Ah, yes, Toji is a father; you remember him telling you about his two children in college, a junior and a sophomore. “They’re at the house right now; saw ‘em after I dropped stuff at the house before bringin’ ya home.” 

You hum. “Sorry for stealin’ you from them for a bit.”

He shakes his head with a humorless laugh. “Please, they probably don’t even know I’m gone. They’re big kids. Plus,” your breath hitches when emerald eyes trail to you. “Now I get to finally have you all to myself, no curvin’ me and whatever this time.” 

“I’m not tryin’ to curve…”

“Yeah, yeah.” He goes back to massaging your feet.

“…Thanks again, Toji. I really appreciate it.”

“No problem, sweetheart.” Your abdomen flexes at the use of the nickname. “You know I always got you…Say, did you hit y’r head somewhere?”

You blink, eyebrows furrow. “No? Why?”

He points to his temple. “Because I see like a lump right here.”

You mirror his movements, your hand touching the spot he’s pointing. And your fingertips meet with a lump on a location that sparks too much familiarity. You gasp aloud and cover the lump with your hand, the other covering your other temple. 

Oh, no.

Black eyebrows knit together. “You okay?”

Play it cool! “Y-Yeah, yeah, I’m fine! You’re right; I probably hit my head somewhere while out.” You take this time to remove your legs off the comfort of Toji’s lap and stand up from the couch. “I’ll put something on it to stop the swelling.” You can also sense something aching down your lower back at that moment. Oh, hell no!!

“Ya sure? Need me fr’ any—“ 

BZZZZ!! BZZZZ!!

Toji’s cut off from the vibration of his phone in his jeans, pulling the device out to see that someone called “Megumi” was calling. Good, a distraction!

“N–No, no, I’m good from here.” You say through gritted teeth, the alcohol taking effect and making your stance a little buzzy to uphold. “J-Just stay here, I’ll be back!” You don’t even wait for his approval, turning on your heel and heading out of the living room to the stairs. Your body feels wobbly with every step you take, but you don’t pay it any mind because you can feel the lumps beneath your palms increasing. “God, please, not now, not today…!”

You march as fast as you can to your bedroom, nearly stumbling on the floor as you haul ass to your bathroom door. You do a terrible job watching your footing fall after rushing to turn the lights on, and stuff from the counter falls because of the impact. But you didn’t care, shuffling up so you could look at the mirror. And the sight you see fills you with immediate dread.

Horns are the first thing you see from either side of your head; the tips curl as if to form a crown but point to the ceiling. Your eyes are no longer human-like, pupils shaped like slits as if morphing into a reptile. And your ears get horizontally pointier.  “…shit.”

You then lift your skirt and tear a hole in your pantyhose above the hem of your panties, and your fear quadruples at the sight of something long and slithery protruding out of the hole. A long tail with a pointy end; you lose your mind. “Shit, shit, shit, shit—”

It’s then you realize why this is happening: you had forgotten to take your daily supplements that are meant to subjugate these features of yourself. You’ve been taking them for the longest time before you moved into this neighborhood, so you’re used to your typical human facade. Now, seeing these parts of yourselves is the very LAST thing you need right now! 

And then something hits you, an unsettling feeling that you’re too scared to confirm. Your eyes travel down to your shirt, your hands hesitantly pulling the bottom tucked into your skirt and lifting to reveal your navel. You then tug the top of your skirt to expose a spot you’re honed in on the mirror. And the urge to scream grows tenfold once you see a black marking on the lower part of your belly. 

A womb tattoo!?!? 

“Oh, my fucking God, not tonight!!”

“YO, HEY!” And just when it couldn’t get worse, you hear Toji coming up the stairs and beelining for your open bedroom door. Wait, no— “I heard screamin’ and a big ‘boom,’ you alright? Where are y—“

Your neighbor stops dead in his tracks once he appears in front of the bathroom opening; his concerned expression shifts to an immediate neutral deadpan. He stares at you, and you stare back at him, the silence so thick you could cut it with a knife. A ring fills your eardrums, dissociating from this entire scene and all its complications.

You want to cry. Maybe scream, throw up, or just straight up die on the spot. 

Because this wasn’t the night for someone to find out you’re a succubus.

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───

“…”

“…”

“…So, what are you?” 

Not even concealing your face in your pillow can hide you from the eventual questions of Toji, who sits idly on the corner of your bed. You cringe internally, never thinking this dilemma would befall you. The point of moving was to turn a new page in your life and leave the past behind with the city. Now, you are shriveling on top of your bed like a moody teenager, and your neighborhood crush is here to witness your depression.

“…What happened to your phone call?”

“It was my kid. I told him to lock the door since I’ll be out a little longer. Don’t try and deflect,” his blunt answer has you descend further to your inner turmoil. “How come I never seen these horns before?”

You sigh heavily; there’s no point in trying to divert now. “…I take supplements that hinder any features of my succubus appearance so I can look like an average human for the rest of the day.”

“Daily?” He sees you nod through his peripheral. “Succubus…the hell’s that?”

“Basically, I’m a demon that…that…” Yeah, no, let’s not finish that. “Never mind.”

“Bullshit. Tell me.” 

“D-Don’t worry about it, it’s not—“

“Look here,” he speaks to you with a stern tone, a hand coming to your waist to shove you a bit. “I went ahead and picked y’re drunk butt up, made sure ya don’t puke up a storm, and now y’re here looking way different from before. The least you could do is explain.”

God, to be lectured by a human – totally humiliating…! “…I’m a demon that gets energy from…se–….sexu, uhh………..sexualactivitywithhumanbeings.”

The silence that trails after your ramble is beyond awkward. 

“Oh.”

…

“Oh.”

God, just kill me right now!

The older man forces a cough. “So, you…have sex every day?” You can practically sense the tiny hint of discomfort from prompting that question.

“W-Well, I used to when I was younger. But I haven’t really…done it in a couple of years.” Jesus Christ, why is it so embarrassing to admit to someone other than yourself? This is the literal worst! 

“Is that bad?”

“It’s, uhh…It can be?” 

“So, why haven’t you done it?”

“Because…!” You snap your face out of your pillow and finally allow yourself to breathe correctly. “I just…I don’t have time like I used to anymore, and using my powers to make people forget afterward can get tiring. Also, the more times I do it, the more my drive gets intense from the last. The desire of a succubus can be dangerous, you know? And since it’s been a while since I’ve let my powers out, I’m sure it’s nastier than ever…”

“…Well,” Toji turns to face you. “Have you ever had the urge recently?”

“I-” Woah. That question came out of nowhere, almost answering it without proper consideration. “Wh–What do you mean by that…”

He shrugs. “Like—you know what I mean—like, even though you try to suppress it, do you still have those urges to do…ya know, it?”

Things get a little uncomfortable here; now you wish you kept your face in that pillow. Tojo’s gaze on you is distinguished — gentle yet stern, matching his demeanor. He's calm and calculating and is waiting for your response to his strangely personal question. 

“I…I, I don’t know.” It was another lie.

“Why’re you lyin’?”

“I’m not…!” Toji clicked his teeth with a face.

“Fine, answer me this then. Have ya ever thought of doin’ it since ya moved here?” 

Yup, this question was far worse than the other. His words echo inside your noggin, bewildered with every syllable relaying. And the widowed man lifts his brow from the lack of an instantaneous answer. You open your mouth, but words fail to aid you, your tail shying away behind your shadow. “I-I…I don’t—“

“Ever thought of me?”

“Toji!” You shout defensively. Sure, it might’ve been out of line to ask. However, it’s the fact that he’s breaking your exterior with every question — because of how on-the-mark he is. You could never prepare yourself for that inquiry, the heat on your face growing more unbearable. How could he know of the frenzy he puts you through just for existing? 

“I’m not dumb.” You peep Toji, turning his torso and facing his entire front in your direction. “You think I don’t notice how often you try to push me off when I invite ya over or know when y’re lookin’ at me when you think I’m not aware’?” He dents the bed with his added weight, and you forget to breathe, watching him inch closer. “Or act all shy and cute when I got you to myself?” 

You gulp, your brain short-circuiting at the feeling of Toji’s palm on your thigh. There have been countless nights where you’ve thought of your neighbor more than once, indulging in fantasies you could never speak of to a soul, especially Toji himself. To let the man know of the dirty things you’d want him to say to you, the names you wish him to call you, the erotic things you’d like him to do to you — death is the only option necessary not to let that happen. Unfortunately, he seems to have a good idea now that he’s cornered you like this, and you’re too stunned to utter a word.

“It’s okay, though,” he whispers low now that he’s close to your face, and you have to hold back on letting out a yelp when his hand comes to hold your face, his index finger toying with your sensitive earlobe. “‘Cuz I love it when y’re all timid, can’t even look me in the face…Like now.”

You try to avert away from him, but his thumb brings your chin back to him. “Toji, please,” his name feels forbidden to say all of a sudden. 

“Tell me ‘no’.” His nose brushes the tip of yours, and you chew your lip. “I’ll stop right now and leave, let you deal with this y’reself…Or,” he ghosts to your ear, and you quiver. “I’ll stay with you and treat you to what y’ve been scared to ask fr’.”

“Toji, wait,” Fuck, you can’t remember the last time you had your ears so keen, his breath brushing it enough to compel you to meltdown.

“Say ‘no,’ princess.” You’re locked under his forest-green orbs, and you swear you could hear your heart hammering your chest. “Or I’ll treat you right tonight.”

Perplexed eyes can’t move anywhere else, and your lips are wet from licking them without knowing. Is this really happening…? An inquisition you had no time to answer for yourself once Toji closes the gap, centimeters nearer with every millisecond.

I…can’t…

His face draws near, and your eyes reflex to close. 

I don’t…want to…

Toji pulls you in for a gentle kiss; your thoughts radio silent after the contact of his scarred lips on yours. No shot. Your neighbor was kissing you right now — there’s no way!? This had to be a dream…! This is truly a wild night: not only are you tipsy to the noggin, but your neighborhood crush has found out your secret, and now you’re kissing that exact crush in your room?? Your muscles go tense at what is occurring. 

He peppers your lips with kisses, forced to catch up with him as he claims your lips, a palm snaking to the back of your head to keep you steady. He licks your bottom lip, chewing gently to prompt the softest gasps out of your mouth. “C’mon, baby,” he coos to your sensitive ears. “Relax wit’ me.” You nearly melt at the lick of your helix as his free hand courses from your chest to your waist. The brush of his fingers onto your tail makes you jolt. 

“Toji, wait,” you mutter under your breath as he nibbles on your pointy ear, your hands gripping the back of his black wife beater. “D-Don’t; I’m so sensi—Nmmm…!” Jesus, the moan you held back! Toji trails his mouth to your chin down to your neck to suck on your skin. And your lower half throbs harder. “Ahhh…hahhh…”

He returns his lips to yours; this time, his tongue runs on your teeth vigorously to seek entry. You submit after a chew to your bottom lip, whimpering as the older man inserts his wet muscle to greet yours. Surreal, isn’t it, to be tongued down by your neighbor? You don’t know whether it’s the alcohol, the twitches between your inner thighs, or the flick of his tongue and the sound of his purrs that have your face getting hotter. 

And fuuuuuuck, he’s such a good kisser — scratch that, he’s an AMAZING kisser! You’re practically turning into putty in the palm of his hands as he lips you, tilting his head to a proper position with a soft push to your face as he deepens the kiss. He sucks on your tongue, and you mewl, helplessly quivering when he teases the muscle with nibbles. Your waist has a mind of its own while it sways involuntarily, rocking as you sink into the zealous kiss. He’s not overpowering you in any way; if anything, he’s so overwhelmingly comforting, his hand caressing your cheek tenderly, and soft noises of lips smacking and breaking apart bounce one after the other.

Then, you shrill unexpectedly. “…!! Mmahhh! T-Tojiii, d-don’t—don’t touch…Haahhh…”

“Oh? Well, lookie here.” Your ears perk at Toji’s chuckle. Unbeknownst to you, distracted by the intense kiss, your neighbor sneaks his hand under your skirt and touches your private zone shielded by your pantyhose, fingers pressing up on your vulva area. “All we did is kiss, and ya already got your panties wet?”

Embarrassed? Of course, it’s been so long since you were touched like this and out of practice. Now, your repressed emotions start to crumble out of their straightened form the more Toji’s middle finger rubs on your panties. And let’s not even mention your thighs motioning to ride on the digit, your dignity starting to disintegrate. “Ohhh, Toji…”

“Mmm? What is it, sweetie?” He nuzzles to your neck after licking and sucking on your chin. “Feelin’ good down there?” He curls his middle and forefinger to push. “Got ya all excited?” He receives a confirmed hum. “Tell me how y’re feelin’.”

You gulped thickly, your breathing shaking. “I-I’m feeling—shit…” he laughs lowly at your swearing. “Nnnm! You’re making me feel…so hot.”

“I can tell, you’re twitchin’ like crazy right on my fingertips.” His fingers move into a circular motion, and your mouth goes agape. “Fuck, man…Hey, hold on, I wanna do somethin’.”

Toji removes his fingers from under your skirt before you can tell, the heat between your legs going tepid as he withdraws from your figure to lay his back on the bed. But before that, he unzips and loosens his jeans to his butt. A noticeable tent of his boxer briefs has your lips locked to each other, and your eyes widen when he subtracts the material. Just when you thought this night couldn’t get any more crazier, you are awake to witness the display of Toji’s erection in real-time. 

How long has it been since you’ve seen a real-life, living, and breathing dick before your eyes? You honestly can’t recall that; the responsibilities of human life have made you grow numb to your demon necessities that it no longer feels innate. However, the sight of your crush’s solid, girthy, excited cock is marveling. How your mouth waters as you ogle at it is borderline humiliating, eyes glued to the uncut tip.

“Like what ya see?” He asks smugly, kicking his jeans and briefs off and slapping his thigh. “C’mere, mama.” Oh, fuck, the quirk of your insides was unavoidable at his comment, primarily as he guides you closer to him. “Let’s warm up.” You yelp as he effortlessly moves your legs to where you straddle him. He pushes your skirt up to your waist, and you can hear the tear from your pantyhose. His thumb comes to slide your panties to the side, and he whistles. “Damn, lookin’ all pretty and wet fr’ me.” 

It’s either the fact that Toj’s dick is inches in front of your face or your bare pussy out in the air in front of him; either one of the two has your mind going in a whirlwind. And it all comes to a standstill the moment you sense something wet and firm glide across your labia, and it takes everything in you not to tremble. “Mmm, oh, fuck,” he groans after licking your cunt, throwing in another lazy one to have you holler. “It’s been so long…Shit.”Toji’s hands curl from your legs to cup your asscheeks, keeping your butt near him to lap his tongue around your chasm. You whine as he licks you down, your teeth clattering at the sensation. 

Oh, my God, your head begins to ache. It feels so good, your body finally coming back to the groove of things as you move your butt around. The man under you quickly latches his mouth onto you, a firm grip on your ass to keep you in place for him to service you. Speaking of service, your eyes flick to the erect limb before you, your mouth salivating with the run of your tongue across your teeth. Fuck, it looks so good; you admire internally before inching your face close to the length, your head getting dizzier from the sheer size and musk. Damnit…I wanna taste him so bad…!!

“Go on, dollface,” Toji gives your butt a playful smack. “I know ya need this bad.” 

God, he’s so right — you need this; there’s no point in denying anymore. You blow on it before placing a tender kiss, noticing how it pulsates as your hand wrings around the shaft. You lick your lips before pecking at the uncircumcised tip, and Toji’s hold on you goes tighter. He’s sensitive, you note. Adorable. You stick your tongue out to swirl around the cockhead, bathing it with your saliva before you inhale it with a delighted hum, gradually warming up your loosened jaw.

Fuck, the taste of a cock — something that felt nostalgic the moment he graced your tastebuds. Your eyes water a bit, trembles rocking your figure as Toji sucks on your wetness, and every inch you intake fuels the haze that fogs your brain. You stroke and suck him simultaneously, a forgotten method that rekindles now in this moment. You coat him with your spit the more you relax your jaw, slurping him unapologetically as if a different part of yourself takes over. 

On the other hand, Toji feels the same way. It’s been way too long for the widowed man since the last time he has been intimate with someone, let alone have a bare ass right in front of him. It’s no secret that he’s had the hots for you once you moved here, but having you on top of him like this is like something out of his wet dreams. The way you murmur cutely as you suck his dick turns him on so bad, a guilty pleasure come true as he drinks your nectar off your damp naked folds. His tongue teases around the entrance of your vagina before pushing it in, fucking your opening with his wet muscle. You cry on his girth, your tail cringing in the air from the stimulation. He spots it and grabs it from the base; how your lower half jolts to the grasp is humorously darling to him. So cute.

The minutes go longer as you two keep pleasing each other, and a soft whimper escapes your lips when you release Toji from your lips, lips plastering long and sweet kisses on his shaft as you massage the tip. Your other hand palms and kneads his ballsack, the jerk of his thighs rewarding to see, so you increase the pace of your hand.

“—Thhh, nmm!” Toji curses from behind, sluggishly licking from clit to your slit while succumbing to your touch and mouth. “Shiiit, just like that, baby, suck me off like t—Mmngh! Christ, I’m gonna..fffuckin’ cum…”

But then, you remove yourself from Toji’s member, the cold air instantly blanketing him. Green eyes blink as you move off of his lying body, observing you bending over with your face to the cold sheets.

“Toji,” you plea to him desperately, hooded eyes shining eagerly. “Please, I need it…Here,” you spread your ass, fully exposing your slit wet from your fluids mixed with his saliva. Jesus, you were heathing as if you were in heat. “Do it here, I need it inside…!”

You had the man shook; the cogs in his mind stopped working briefly. The picture of you presenting yourself like this to him was unexpected, but goddamn, did it turn him on astronomically! Toji stands on his knees and advances to you, removing his tank top and discarding it to the floor. “Yeah? You want it that bad?” You nod impetuously. “Words, sweetie. Need you to tell me what to do.”

“Toji, pleeease…!” You wiggle your ass until he cusps it, kneading your flesh lovingly to the point that your tail curls around his forearm. “Please, put it in, I wanna feel it…!”

“Yeah, is that what my princess wants?” You and Toji bite your lips when he aligns his tip to your inner labia, teasing you with grinding motions. “Does my demon baby want Daddy to mess y’r insides that bad?”

Oh, we’re playing that card, too? Holy shit, you were getting so wet from this! “Yess, Daddy, pleasee! Mess me up with that dick, wanna be filled up right nooww…!”

He can’t hide the proud grin. “Good girl. Here,” Toji begins to push the cockhead to you, and your lips flatten at the wince of pain that accompanies the push. “Stay still, and lemme reward you,” his hips move slowly in your direction, you grip the sheets to prepare yourself, and your nerves are dialed to a plane of exhilaration you can’t regulate. Oh my God, is this happening? He’s gonna fuck me? So many thoughts cloud your mind, too excited and anxious for what’s to come because it’s been so. Damm. Long. How’s it gonna feel? Is your body ready enough? How does Toji feel about this; is he just as nervous as you a—

Your train of thought is brought to an abrupt halt at the sensation of Toji’s tip finally inserting itself into your vagina, too absentminded that your open mouth couldn’t say a word. Oh, fuck it’s in, it’s in! Your eyes widen, your muscles tense, and your voice struggles to cry. The older man continues to add himself leisurely, the length sundering your slit and stretching your opening as you take him inch by inch. Your back arches instinctively, wailing silently as you can feel the foreign limb intruding your tightness, quick quirks of your frame as he rubs your velvety texture. Ohhhh, my God…!!

When he slowly starts to rut into you, recurring waves of rapture hit your nerves every. Single. Time! You’re entire body is rocked to the core with every short yet gentle pound; the feeling of Toji’s veiny cock scrapping your channel has you shivering. And once he’s encouraged to push his entire member until the very hilt, you yelp aloud when the tip kisses your womb. “—Oooh??!”

“—Mmngh!” Your quick spasm surprises Toji. “Ohhh, shit, there it is. Hmm? Is this where ya want me, mama? Want me right…here?” He snaps his hips swiftly, the rushed movement and hit to your cervix knocks you winded. And another, you keep wringing his shaft acutely. “Ahhn, God fucking damn i—Iisshhffuck, fuck, I can’t, gonna…Hnghh!”

Toji’s body shudders above you, bucking into your warmth with a jittery pattern. The prolonged reaction of his orgasm claims him now, succumbing to the silky, tight texture and how well you’re grasping onto his girth. He comes inside you, moaning as he ejaculates earlier than expected. You sense it, humming to the immediate filling. So warm, so full of his cock already that your toes curl. 

And Jesus Christ, it felt so. Fucking, Good! You were no longer drunk from the alcohol; now, you were intoxicated by the prowess and pleasure of Toji’s dick. 

“Hah, haaaah, fuck,” he throws his head back with a hiss, his abdomen relaxing from the earlier flex. Then, your tail glides up from his abs, feeling up on his skin and roaming on his happy trail. He snickers at your feline-like comportment, “Heh, actin’ all cute now that you got what ya wanted, huh?” You say nothing, bashful to his words, while your tail curls up to his chin. “Don’t go quiet on me now, dollface; I heard you squeaking and moanin’ seconds ago.”

Toji then returns to rut into you despite recovering from his climax, furled to have you shrieking uncontrollably for him. The smacks of his pelvis recoil the flesh of your ass, his come stuffed inside you now glued to his erection as he rocks into you balls-deep. “Mmmm, yeah, that’s right, baby,” he grabs your tail and wraps it around his hand to pull; you scream louder, and your vaginal walls clamp tighter than ever. “Arch more fr’ me, enjoy me—nmm…!—fuckin’ you real good.”

The pull of your tail makes your senses hypersensitive, perturbed by the stress of it being pulled, yet the enjoyment you feel from it is too inexorable to comprehend. Coherent sentences double down to undecipherable babbles, “—Daahh, hoohhfuuc—D-Daddyyy, Daddyyy…!!” Tears well up in your eyes as he inflicts blows to your ass, the pain too quick to prepare for yet the sting enough to make you rigid. “—Too much, ish t’oo muuuch…!”

Another smack to your butt, and you howl once again. “Huh, ya say that, but y’re milkin’ my cock like crazy.” He bends down to remove your hands that try to hide your face and horns with the pillow. “What, ya don’t like this? Hmm? Want me to stop?” 

“No, nooo!!” You shook your head immediately; your vision blurred for a few seconds. “I loveee iit, I love this, love Daddy’s diick—Ahaaa!! More…I want moreee!” Fuck, this is bad; any more than this, and you’ll be addicted for sure.

“Good,” he whispers to your ears. Good Lord, you weren’t going to survive. “Because I ain’t done wit’ ya yet, princess.”

Before you can register his sentence fully, Toji straightens and lays on his side behind you, lifting your leg to create a suitable angle. He then plunges into you harder and faster, the different positions helping the sporadic cadence achieve deeper penetration while scraping your upper wall with ease. At this point, your body is too hot and sticky to care about anything else outside this room; your head pounding and too misty, your senses corrupted by the constant pokes to your cervix and the increasing haze that you don’t feel human anymore. Your succubus roots flourish, drool escapes your lips, and wanting nothing but this feeling to remain ceaseless.

“Gahh, ohhhDaddyyy, ahhahh,” eyes roll to your skull at the brush of your sweet spots. “Shhoo good, I fweel shoo gooood…! Harder, hardeeerr!” 

“—Khhck, goin’ as hard as I fuckin’ can!!” Toji kisses your cheek after a lick, chewing on it after hearing you mewl submissively. “Jesus, this pussy, out of this fuckin’—Nnngh…world.”

You turn to him and claim his lips, and he reciprocates into your steamy kiss. Vulgar tongues exchange spit and encroach on each other’s mouth, and you helplessly suck on Toji’s after he shoves it, your puffy lips intaking the attractive noises he makes. And you slither a hand down to your clitoris to swipe erratically while your tail goes around Toji’s waist and curves into the crevice of his ass. Suddenly, Toji stiffens at the pointy end of your tail, tickling his anus, and the raven-haired man gasps at the insertion. Too stunned to speak, he can only move his hips rapidly, his white-ringed shaft digging deep into you with the help of stimulating his prostate. 

“—Taahhh, y-you, lil’ minx…!” He breaks the kiss and bites your lip to hear you whimper. “Tryin’ ta make me cum again?”

You nod, breathing heavily. “Ohhh, Daddy, I’m so close…! Gonna come!”

“Me too, mama, me too…” 

Hot moans and groans fly out of each other’s mouths, bodies stuck to each other as you both chase for release. Everything feels so fast, so hot, happening all at once; all you can think about is the grinding presses you push up on your delicate clit. Fuck, fuck! It’s coming, it’s coming…!”

Then, it arrives. Your cunt, aching for the climax, receives the crescendo you’ve been aching for this entire time. The walls of your vulva contract around Toji’s member, milking and wringing him as you come loose to your grounding. A clear liquid exerts out of your urethra, showering out to stain your panties, torn pantyhose, and bedsheets, your breathing losing its steadiness and falling to a jagged tempo. The same goes for Toji, who falls into his peak along with you; your fluttering folds force him to submit and release his second load into you with a hiss. The older man’s heaving frame keeps bucking into you until every drop fills you to the brim, burrowing his face deep into your neck to rest as the shocks rock you both.

Finally, everything goes quiet. The cozy atmosphere pulls you out of your heightened elevation and lays you down with silent clarity. Both you and Toji, sweaty and sticky all over, are still linked to each other as the high dissipates. Shuddering figures begin to calm down and fall at ease with the tranquility.

Toji kisses your neck, and you croon until he comes to lay his lips on yours for a tender peck, then on your soft cheek and your temple. He then removes his flaccid bulge, white fluids oozing out of your hole. “Damn, that was good,” he mutters breathlessly. “Hmm, how ya feel—“

The onyx-haired man couldn’t finish his question because of the sudden change of positions you abruptly conducted. He now lays on his back with you straddling him; the calm tone switched to an unexpected spiking mood. 

You then hand grab his dick and arrange it back to your raised hips. Viridian orbs widen. Wait. The tip meets your labia once more before you descend it down. What the f—hold on— And then, his cock is swallowed back inside your wetness, and Toji grits his teeth.

 “Sh-Shit, sweetie,” Toji’s hands come to your waist. “What’s up, aren’t y—“

“Sorry, Toji,” the man surveys with confusion, watching you strip off and throw your shirt somewhere. Your naked chest is now out for him to see, and his breath hitches when you place your hands on his pectorals while a span of bat-like wings springs out from your back. “…That wasn’t enough.”

Wasn’t enough?? He repeats with furrowed brows, noticing the half-lidded, lustful expression and the sharp dents of your canines. Then, it hits him: 

“The desire of a succubus can be dangerous, you know? And since it’s been a while since I’ve let my powers out, I’m sure it’s nastier than ever…”

…Oh, shit. “Wait, we can talk about—“ You get your answer once you bounce on his cock without notice, Toji nearly choking on his tongue. Nope, no room for prattling.

“You let out so much, made my mind go so crazy,” you grind your hips on his pelvis, squeezing his limp cock while it gets firmer and firmer. “Feel so good…More, I want moreee…”

“C-C’mon now, baby, can’t we take a break for a minute at least—“You bring your face an inch away from his.

“Daddy,” your neighbor shudders at the gentle kiss you place under his chin. “Please take care of me like you promised, ‘kay?”

Your gaze lured him in, a trap he was foolish enough to fall for. Because now, he’s stuck under your bow as you begin to inflict an inescapable rhythm, rebounding on his erection until the base meets your folds. Choked groans suppressed by Toji, but take his lips with yours, enforcing a loving yet salacious spell with your satisfied moans. Now, your crush realizes you weren’t the meek, adorable neighbor he dotes on. 

Tonight, he was yours to play like a fiddle…And shame on him for getting way more turned on than he should be!

Wow. Guess I’m dyin’ tonight.

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───

I should be fuckin’ dead right now.

Toji knew something was up when his eyelids opened, and his emerald eyes scanned the ceiling, instantly recognizing that he wasn’t in his master bedroom. The rays of sunshine are blocked from the curtains, yet the light of day crawls in and basks the room in a low glow. Chirps of birds outside greet him on the basking of a new autumn day, lying comfortably in the cold, silky sheets of the bed.

He wakes to a bit of a headache, mentally and physically groggy. Attempts to move are already tricky and aches all over his body keep him grounded in the mattress. Ugh, feel like I’ve lost all feelin’ in my legs; the man can’t even lift one leg without a grimace. And even his arms are challenging, one so oddly heavy as if it’s nailed down. 

“Fuck, man.” His first words of the day are a curse, irritated by the drum of his head. He tries to lift himself; again, it’s not possible, agitating the man even more. And why the fuck is my arm so hea—

He doesn’t finish his sentence — the answer reveals itself once he turns his head to the left. 

He sees you, surprised to view you in your natural form still. Horns have grown a little larger, yet still small enough for you to rest your cheek on his shoulder. You were sound asleep, faint snores picked up by his ears as he examined your face at ease with a peaceful slumber. Nude, the both of you, a hand wrapped around his left arm to stick close to you while the other is stationed at his chest, your bat wings shriveled together to not get damaged. And judging by the snake-ish feeling, your tail was curled around his bare thigh. 

Strangely innocent to see after the events of last night flash into Toji’s recollection, funny to match such a lewd scenario to such a sweet face. He stifles a laugh, placing his right hand on the vulnerable one on him, his thumb caressing your knuckles as he grasps your fingers. Suddenly, some of the soreness he harbors feels light — glad I ain’t dead, I guess.

Your eyes jit behind your eyelids, a soft groan as you suddenly move and scrunch your face. Finally, your drowsy eyes sheepishly flicker open. Lidded gaze fighting the spell of sleep with every bat of your eyes.

“Mornin’, gorgeous.” Toji greets you.

“…”

“…”

In real-time, Toji watches your somnolent morph into a gradual display of mortification. He’s a little envious to see you spring up with no strain on your body, wings batting out of their relaxed state, and your hand still with his. “T-Toji??” You question directly, eyes surveying the nude neighbor in your bed, doing everything in your power to ignore the fact that you’re naked as well. Speaking of, you notice the subtle pink glow of your womb tattoo, and anxiety spikes to a high. “I–uhh–I’m so so sorry for last night! Sorry you had to bring me back home, and I didn’t mean to act weirdly on you with—Ooof?!”

“Relax,” he cuts you off by pulling you back to his lying frame, his left hand now free to snake on your shoulder. “Don’t talk so fast; my head’s poundin’ like crazy.”

You blink aimlessly, awkward now that you’re fully aware you’re in this man’s embrace. You can’t help recalling what transpired last night, suddenly feeling squeamish. “…You okay?”

“I feel like my life’s been drained by my dick,” he answers bluntly, adding more weight to your embarrassment. “Wakin’ up to a pretty face who nearly killed me with their pussy isn’t somethin’ I’d expect.” 

“……sorry.”

“It’s alright,” calloused fingers glide and intertwine with his yours, stroking your thumb with his. “Had a good time either way. Wild, but good.”

“Really…?” 

“Really.” You probably shouldn’t have peered up to see him look your direction. Albeit exhausted, his handsome face and sleepy grin ignite the heat on your cheeks. And your stomach flips, hearing a laugh when you meekly avert your gaze away. “How many times did we do it?”

“…Not sure,” long enough for my womb tattoo to be blatant. 

“Me either. Does that happen often?”

“Sometimes? I guess it’s because I haven’t done it for a long time, so I went…off the rails because of the intensity.”

“Noted, because I never felt so old until now. I probably pulled somethin’.”

“….Sorry.”

“Y’re good,” Toji scoffs before moving to place a soft kiss on your forehead, and your heart skips the tighter his hand holds your hand. “Tell ya what, I can help you with that cycle of yours, probably…twice a month, so it doesn’t get too crazy like last night. And don’t use y’re powers or some shit to make me forget, either. I don’t wan’ that.”

You lift your face from his shoulder, the heat spreading to your ears. “You don’t have to do that, Toji, I wouldn’t—“

“Nah, I’m down; it’s what neighbors for. Besides, it finally gives me a reason to make ya interact with me more.” Again, his smug smirk causes knots in your stomach. “Like the sound of that, mama? Let Daddy take care of you?”

Your lips quiver, and you hide your face back onto his shoulder. The rumble of his laughter worsens the butterflies in your stomach, and your tail squeezes on his thigh. “Don’t say it like that, Toji!”

“Y’r tail seems to like it.”

“Stop it!”

♱ 𝐌𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭

© 𝐇𝐨𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐠𝐫𝐚𝐲2024 – reblogs + comments are appreciated wholeheartedly ☆ header art by tamayura banko + dividers by @cafekitsune.

[6gumi]

breathless.

synopsis ﹒jjk men giving you surprise kisses gone wrong (GONE SEXUAL!) that’s it. that’s the fic

pairings ﹒toji fushiguro, yuuta okkotsu, yuuji itadori, satoru gojo x f!reader

cw ﹒a little suggestive. not proofread (oops), makeout sessions kinda?, yuuji + yuuta aged up! slight vaginal fingering involved, dirty talk, petnames used ! (princess, baby, etc etc) you guys literally just make out n it goes wrong . . . do i need to say more ? <3

note ﹒sm thoughts sm thoughts sm thoughts !!! yuuji’s is the only fluff n innocent one LMFAO feel free 2 interact w me by sending an ask ! i’m still trying 2 finish up my requests so please be patient and know that only thirsts r open for now <3 — millie ! ♡

୨୧ 𝐓𝐎𝐉𝐈 𝐅𝐔𝐒𝐇𝐈𝐆𝐔𝐑𝐎

toji always loved teasing you, especially during makeout sessions you both would have occasionally. he does a lot and i mean a lot of things to tease you during them too, it’s unfair! he loved it whenever you had your arms crossed infront of him, eyebrows furrowed while you lectured him for his laziness. he merely just chuckled at your attempts to tell him off for being such a lazy jerk, slowly closing the distance between both of you. you can’t blame him, can you? it’s not like you wanted him to stop either.. it’s crazy how your voice and that irritated look in your eyes left him feeling light-headed. before he knew it, toji you in his arms, holding you just a little too tight. “hey! let go of me, toji. ‘m not finished saying what i wanna say—“ and.. there he goes again. a deep groan left him as his lips traced each inch of your neck, his entire body clenched as he grabbed your wrist. toji’s other hand buried itself in your hair, caressing and pulling at it from the back, interlocking his lips with yours..

god.. your makeout sessions always begin this way, but honestly you didn’t really complain. toji ran his hand up your body, wrapping it around your neck as she squeezed it lightly.. careful not to hurt you too much. his lips on yours was the sweetest torture you had ever felt in your whole life, your heart pounding against your chest at a furious pace as he held you closer to him, not letting go of you anytime soon. “sorry, doll. what’d ya say earlier? too busy kissin’ these pretty lips of yours.” “oh great, and you weren’t even listening too?” the raven just shrugged, a smug expression painted on his face. “dunno, just wanted t’kiss your lips, you talk too much princess.. needed to shut you up.” gosh, you could’ve sworn you felt a vein popping out of your forehead out of frustration, is this guy for real? “mm.. can i continue kissing your lips?” was all he said, a low sigh leaving your lips before you waited for him to kiss you again. “oh no baby, not these lips. i mean the other ones.” oh yeah, expect yourself to be breathless after this.. kisses or not!

୨୧ 𝐘𝐔𝐔𝐓𝐀 𝐎𝐊𝐊𝐎𝐓𝐒𝐔

yuuta can’t help it! he couldn’t help but admire you the whole time you rambled about a weird first interaction you had with his companion toge inumaki and how hard it was to understand him! thank the lord you didn’t even notice just how intensely his eyes stared at you, as if they were digging daggers into your soul. this is probably a constant thing for him, i feel like yuuta likes giving you shy surprise kisses out of nowhere! and sometimes, he can’t even control his body and they just smooooch your lips, atleast.. that’s what he says! he can’t help but grin every single time he sees that flustered expression on your face after he catches you off guard with his surprise kisses, he’s just trying to have after all. though sometimes he’s aware that, these “small yet shy surprise kisses” will turn into much more than what they seem. and you wanna know what they turn into? heated makeout sessions of course!

yuuta’s large hands rest on the nape of your neck, the other on your waist as he pushes you down the mattress with his weight, trying his best not to crush you completely with his body as his kisses were slow.. slow and passionate yet you knew that was gonna change in a few minutes or so, and you were right! in the blink of an eye, yuuta wraps his two hands beneath your thighs, lifting you up slightly so your legs wrapped around his waist, pulling the both of you closer and into a more passionate yet lustful embrace and kiss. the special grade sorcerer pulled away, chuckling when you puckered your lips a tiiny bit to taste his sweet lips on yours again, yuuta gave your jaw a small peck. “may i?..” the raven muttered under his breath.. lifting your skirt and tugging at the hem of your panties. just know that.. if you nod and say yes, oh boy. be prepared to stay up all night! those surprise kisses were a trap to kiss you until you were breathless!

୨୧ 𝐘𝐔𝐔𝐉𝐈 𝐈𝐓𝐀𝐃𝐎𝐑𝐈

let’s see here.. to sum things up, yuuji loves giving you surprises kisses! and i mean loves it! he likes catching you off guard whenever he presses a kiss against you, your boyfriend gives you small little surprise kisses literally anywhere and everywhere, so much that you even have to tell him to tone down a bit because of how flustered you were! “but why, babe? i like kissing you..” he knew you liked it whenever he was affectionate so he would plant many many love kisses all over you nonstop! usually sometimes he even just gives you one when it’s unnecessary or so, kissing you on the cheek while you scroll on your phone.. kissing the nape of your neck from behind whenever you were in the kitchen, sneakily kissing your inner thigh from beneath the bedsheets, you name it! yuuji yawned as he wrapped an arm around your waist, scooting you even closer against him. “babe, can i kiss you?” no answer, you were too focused on that stupid movie you wanted to watch, he didn’t think you’d get this invested. the male gently put a hand on your thigh, surprise-kissing the blade of your shoulder with much desire and love.

anndd.. here you both go again.. on the couch as the room was filled with sharp heavy panting and lewd noises. yuuji’s hands grabbed onto your waist and moved you back and forth on his gap, feeling a bulge press against you as your cunt pulsed around nothing.. you prayed he didn’t feel anything. you always wondered how he’s so sweet and delicate with your kisses as if you were some kind of gentle flower you needed to protect, his touches were so soft.. so gentle and yet a little hesitant.. not wanting to hurt you in anyway. his mouth moved towards your jaw and then your hands. “you should kiss me more babe, i like how soft your lips feel on mine.” “i already allow you to give me surprises kisses in private and public, what more do you need, hm?” “.. another kiss, maybe? or maybe.. more kisses? more than the amount i give you in one day?” ahh.. you know you can’t say no to him, you knew just how much he wanted to kiss you breathless.

୨୧ 𝐒𝐀𝐓𝐎𝐑𝐔 𝐆𝐎𝐉𝐎

surprise kisses with him are a must (atleast 2 him!) he loves sneaking small little pecks on your cheek and lips, though.. his surprise kisses are rather bold and lead to more intimate moments between the both of you. heated and long messy makeout sessions to more.. bolder ones, though you aren’t complaining really, he isn’t either.. in-fact he loves the faces you make whenever he plunges his tongue inside your mouth with no warning at all, grabbing at your ass.. your waist, you name it! scolding him about his “surprise” kisses won’t help either, he just knows how to rile you up in no time! the special grade groaned into the kiss as he pulled you onto his lap, grabbing your hips and squeezing at it with his hands. satoru sighs lowly, struggling against the heat and lust that was now flowing through his body like hot lava, he wanted more and he craved more.. he didn’t even care that it was supposed to be a “small” surprise kiss, he wanted you and he wanted you now. you sure do have that effect on him.

“you’re such a cute little angel for me, mhm? stay still for me a bit, yeah?” oh you knew what he was gonna do. you hear him spit on the top of his fingers for a second, body jolting as you felt his fingers rubbing your clit. “i’m sorry. i can’t get enough of you. look at this, you’re so wet already, angel. all this for me? all because of the kissing, hm?” he rubbed the slit of your pussy with two fingers at a harsher pace.. feeling your wetness on his fingers. “c’mon, keep kissing me pretty. don’t let these fingers distract you, yeah?” was all he said before the sweetness of his lips returned on your own, his kisses were sloppy and messy but yet he didn’t show any signs of stopping anytime soon.. his digits curling in your cunt, forcing a muffled moan from your lips. adding another finger in, he could feel how tight his pants felt.. getting all hard just from fingering you and kissing you alone was crazy enough, he wasn’t playing around.. he wanted more.. and he’ll get more. satoru will do this over and over again until you’re absolutely breathless.

[holylulusworld]

Come to heaven

Title: Come to heaven

Written for @buckybarnesbingo (Round 6)

Card: B004

Square Filled: K5: handle with care

Ship/Main Pairing: Mobster!Bucky Barnes x Ex!Reader

Rating: Mature

Major Tags/Triggers/Warnings: angst, jealousy, ex! sugar babe trope, drunkness, fluff, hopeful ending

Summary: Making amends is hard.

A/N: Lyrics in Italics taken from Bruno Mars' "Locked Out of Heaven"

Word Count: 1,7k+

BBB BuckyBarnesBingo 2024 masterlist

Catch up here: Go to hell

Written in reader’s PoV

Bucky tries to slip his hand into your panties, but you wrap your hand around his wrist to stop him. This is how he always made you compliant and stopped any argument.

“No! Not this time.”

“No?” He sounds surprised. Of course, he’s surprised. You always gave in and let him seduce you. Pleasure and having his attention, even for a fleeting time, was better than thinking about the future, or your non-existent relationship.

“No!” You stiffen in his arms. “Let go of me. I won’t let you do this to me all over again. It’s always the same. You stop me from speaking my mind with your lips, hands, or cock. I’m done being a sexual object, a toy you can play with to you.”

“Doll, I…” Bucky reluctantly releases you from his embrace. He steps away to watch you turn around. “What do you mean?”

“This,” you press your hand to your heart, “was yours. I admitted my feelings and waited for you to at least tell me that I mean a little more to you than a set of holes you can fill. But…” you sniffle but put a brave face on, “you couldn’t even give me that.”

“So, you want to go back to that old man and his limp dick?” He scoffs in an attempt to hide the hurt.

“Even if I’m not in love with him, I know exactly what he wants from me. He won’t make promises of keeping me safe and happy only to turn his back on me the moment I tell him that I love him. With him, I know what I’ll get.”

You try to sidestep Bucky, but he blocks your path. “That’s it? You’ll leave me for that man without giving me the chance to make things up to you.”

“James,” you gently cup his face and look him in the eyes. “You can’t make things up to me with gifts or sex this time. I asked you if you can imagine having a relationship with me. You gave me your answer. It’s my turn to tell you that what you have to offer is not enough.”

“Not enough?” He’s confused. “But I…”

“Money and shiny things cannot replace what you are unwilling to give,” you give him a sad smile. “As much as I enjoyed our time together, it’s over. We both knew it’d end like this. This kind of arrangement is meant to end sooner or later. There is nothing we can do about it.”

You press your lips to his scruffy chin, ending what began as a passionate one-night stand with a soft kiss. “Goodbye, James. I hope, one day, you’ll find something worth being more than…” Your voice cracks and you drop your hands from his face.

“Y/N,” he tries to grab your hand but you step away the moment his fingertips brush your skin. If you give in to him now, you’re doomed to repeat history. “Wait, I can try to be better.”

You give him a weak smile. “No, you won’t, James. You never had to try, and that’s the problem. Your good looks and reputation made everything so much easier for you than for other men.”

He allows you to leave, watching you go to join your companion for the rest of the night. Bucky will sulk in a corner, drinking too much while wishing you’d stayed by his side instead of laughing about the things the old man by your side says.

Bucky is close to losing his patience. He’d hoped scaring the man you chose over him would be enough. Much to his chagrin, your companion from last night is rather amused about Bucky’s presence.

Erik Lehnsherr lived long enough to fear nothing. Not that he ever feared anything else than his own mortality. But at his age, even that fear faded a long time ago.

“I don’t understand why you are here, Mr. Barnes,” Erik leans back in his chair, an amused smirk on his lips. “Do we have business to do? I don’t think so. I’m old, not forgetful.”

“If you release Y/N out of her contract with you, I’ll pay you any sum,” Bucky tries to get you out of your sugar girl arrangement with the old creep.

“A contract?” He quirks a brow. “The lovely lady accompanying me last night came with me to make sure I’m not alone. We don’t have an arrangement. She’s just a lovely young woman spending time with me to help me with my paperwork.”

“Paperwork?” Bucky eyes his concurrent warily. He’s a master at reading people and finding lies behind a friendly smile. “She’s your employee?”

“A freelancer, the young people call it these days,” Erik holds back a chuckle.

When you offered to join him at the party, you told him everything that happened with James Buchanan Barnes. The man breaking your heart. Erik promised he’d do anything to make the fool let you go see that he made a grave mistake.

“I’m old, not someone creeping on young women,” he adds after a long pause. “I had my fair share of lovely ladies and gentlemen when I was younger.” Erik eyes Bucky up and down. “You’d be on top of my list if only I was thirty years younger.”

Bucky backpaddles. He eyes Erik warily before clearing his throat.

”What exactly is Y/N doing for you?”

“I already told you that she does my paperwork. I believed I was the old man here. Maybe you should get your memory checked, young man,” Erik chuckles. “If you’d excuse me now. I’m waiting for a massage therapist. A pretty boy getting this old man going…”

‘Old creep’, Bucky thinks to himself before leaving without saying goodbye. “At least he doesn’t creep on Y/N. That’s a pro.”

Bucky drove to his best friend to release some steam. He told Steve everything about you and the stunt you pulled to make him jealous.

“She tricked you,” Steve can’t help but laugh. “Man, you’ve got yourself a smart little cookie. I bet she tried to wrap you around her finger.”

“I fell for her lie so easily,” Bucky huffs. “I believed she’s riding that creep’s dick. Now I know, she put on a show to get my attention, not to rub it under my nose. My sweet doll is missing me.”

“Well, if she’s your sweet doll try to treat her better. She deserves someone to take good care of her.”

“Steve—”

“No, Buck. You need to handle her with care,” Steve won’t let his friend get away with a false excuse. “Y/N got hurt by you once, Buck. I don’t want you to make the same mistake twice.”

You walk a little faster to outrun Bucky. He’s following you around town, a bouquet of roses in his hands.

He tried to convince you to move in with him, promising the world to you.

“Go away,” you huff. “I don’t know what kind of game you are playing, but I won’t participate. Just leave me alone.”

“You know that you can’t run away from me in those shoes, right?” Bucky smirks when you stop in your tracks to look at the colorful thongs you’re wearing. “I never understood how you can walk in these…”

“I like to feel the sunshine and air on my feet,” you point out. “Not everyone wants to run around in polished leather shoes all the time.”

“Ouch,” he snickers. “Come on, baby doll. Let’s have lunch together. Give me the chance to show you that I can change.”

“Bucky,” you sigh. “You don’t get that I can’t go back to what we had.”

“Y/N,” he drops the roses to cup your face. “I don’t want to go back to what we had. Baby doll, let your Bucky treat you like a queen.”

“I don’t want you to treat me like a queen,” you wrap your hands around his wrists to pull his hands off of your face, “only like someone you respect and love. I want you to treat me like your girlfriend. But you can’t give me that.”

“Baby…”

You look on the ground. “Please pick the roses up and give them to someone who wants to become your next sugar babe. I’m out of this for good.”

Again, you walk away. You’re holding your head high and ignore the ache in your heart as you leave Bucky behind.

'Cause you make me feel like I've been locked out of heaven For too long, for too long Yeah, you make me feel like I've been locked out of heaven For too long, for too long, oh-oh, oh-oh-oh Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah (ooh) Oh, yeah, yeah Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah (ooh) You bring me to my knees, you make me testify (ooh) You can make a sinner change his ways (ooh) Open up your gates 'cause I can't wait to see the light (ooh) And right there is where I wanna stay (ooh)

“What the fuck!” You yell out of your window. Bucky parked his car in front of your apartment complex. He’s singing along to a song, begging you to take him back. “It’s 2 am Bucky! What is wrong with you?”

He turns the volume down and kills the engine before waving at you.

“Baby doll,” he slurs. “I came here to bring you home. ‘m missing you, doll…Please come home.”

“SHUT UP!” one of your neighbors yells out of their window. “Do you know how late it is?”

“It’s 2 am,” Bucky yells back. “Stop yelling so loud. You’ll wake the neighbors!”

“BUCKY! Stop being so loud!”

“Baby…can I come up and cuddle you?” He grins dopily when you slam the window shut. “She loves me!”

“SHUT UP!” Your neighbor yells.

“Shut up!” Bucky yells back. “OH…there you are…” He stumbles toward the door when you get out. “BABY DOLL!”

“Bucky,” you hiss and grab his hand. “Stop yelling and come with me.”

“You look pretty in your pajamas,” he purrs your name and wraps himself around you. Bucky nuzzles his face in your neck and sighs. “Without you, I’m in hell, doll. Forget about that old creep and go for Bucky.” He mutters against you.

You sigh deeply. “Fine, come with me to heaven. You can bunker on my couch. In the morning, we will talk about impulse control and not yelling in the middle of the night.”

Tags in reblog.

[porcelain-siscon]

a doll that you got when you were young, only around 8 or 9, as a sort of surrogate big sister. it looked mostly like a girl your age, at least when it came to its height, and the two of you were inseparable. you mostly still are, though obviously less as you grew up

eventually it was hard to see it as a big sister anymore. you stand more than a foot higher than it now, and it's only been recently that you've started looking at it in a different light. the softness of its thighs that you figured were like that so you wouldn't hurt yourself is just a bit too soft, the ample chest you used to cuddle up to almost obscene in size, the snaking... something under its sewn shut dress so much easier to identify with more personal experience

you had honestly forgotten that the dress was sewn on until recently. years of wear had left much of the fabric faded and worn through, holes all over, some rips, all from a rambunctious childhood it's hard not to look back at with nostalgia. it was your big sister you shared your first kiss with, after all! that's not something you easily forget, even if you can't help but cringe slightly at the memory of kissing a doll

but that doesn't mean you don't love it. your big- well, your little sister, temporally locked as all dolls are, has been a constant companion your whole life, and it really does need some TLC. specifically, you want to get it a new dress, though that will involve removing the old one and taking its measurements. you carefully run your fingers along the neck to find a safe spot to insert the fabric shears, whispering a little "sorry, I'll be quick" as you start to cut

you work along the back, not wanting to nick any of the soft material that make up its breasts, then move over to the side once you're low enough to avoid the same at its cushioned rear. with a final snip, you feel the dress lose the last of its tension, allowing you to slide it off over the arms as you move them into place

what a sight

as a child, you'd never have noticed, but now you can't help but stare. the doll has a figure that was noticeable under the dress, but only just. with it nude like this, you can't ignore the slenderness of its waist and how it contrasts with the width of the thighs; or the way the just ever so slightly blue material that makes up its "skin" shimmers in the light everywhere but its joints, made up of a darker, more matte material; or the way that, even at its height, its breasts are dramatically bigger than yours

you also can't ignore the anatomically correct, improbable as it may be, cock that slumps down over a squishy pair of balls, touching the floor as you sit your little sister doll down

"...let's get these measurements done..." you mutter to it as much as you do yourself, getting out the measuring tape. laying it down on its back, trying to ignore the way its breasts fall to the side, trying to ignore everything about it, you read its height at 125cm. certainly taller than most dolls. inhaling to steel yourself, you sit it back up and measure around its chest

125cm again. surely not. no, that's absurd

again, you measure, again, 125cm

the same as its height? somebody was certainly in a mood with this design

propping it up some more, you balance it out on its feet and measure around its waist, getting a much more reasonable 75cm. looking down, trying to keep your eyes off its cock, you measure around its clearly wider hips, finding them to be 100cm. the level of precision was odd, if not just for what it was being used for

you found yourself staring again. it was just... hanging there. it was hanging there and you already had the measuring tape out. you could just see for yourself. you had an excuse

"sorry, I'm nearly done" you whispered to it, as if it could register any apology at all. one end of the tape right at the base of the crotch, then slowly measured out all the way to the tip. you expected 25cm, just to keep with the trend, but found it capped out at 32

"that's... weird..."

if it weren't for the imperial measurements on the other side of the tape measurer, you never would have noticed. 12 and 1/2 inches. 12.5

125cm tall

125cm bust

12.5 inch dick

you can't help but laugh. it is a little absurd, isn't it? absurd, and perhaps inappropriate that you got it when you were a kid, but it's hard to really think about that context in the moment. finishing off the laughing fit with a sigh, you say "let's get you covered up" and grab an old t-shirt, lifting its arms up and pulling it over its head. while definitely tight around the chest, it's at least long enough to cover it up

...mostly

it clearly dangles out the bottom, and you think about putting a pair of panties on it, though brush the idea off as there's not a chance that thing would fit in anything you own

"what am I going to do with you?"

you pick it up, one hand under its rear and one hand supporting its head, and carry it over to your bed to tuck it in there for the time being. normally you'd leave it on the chest of drawers, but with how exposed it is, that seems a little inappropriate, even if you never have guests over. once it's tucked in nice and tight, you give it a kiss on the forehead almost entirely on instinct

it looks so cozy...

well... it is your bed, after all, and it is your little sist- it is your doll, after all. you pull the covers back and climb into bed with it, wrapping your arms around it and pulling it close. you can feel the cool squish of its chest against yours, and its equally cool length press up against you. you do your best not to think too much about it

and lean in to give it a kiss on the lips. were they this soft when you kissed it as a child? they must have been, it's just that something about this kiss feels different, more intimate, perhaps after everything you just saw

best not to think about it too much, best not to kiss too much either. instead, you try and keep the idea of its new dress in your mind, even if you can't help but think about its naked body

[omaano]

SW Hades AU June Update

Other monthly updates: May - June - July - August

This month I’ve had some time to organize my notes and plans for my Star Wars meets Hades AU - I have a massive table for all of the characters, which original Hades game character they had been modeled after, and whether they need portraits/tokens/keepsakes/crests/etc. it’s colour coded and everything. (Fennec had to be cut out from the lineup and I’m hopelessly heartbroken about the whole thing* 😭)

Everyone has an icon who needs one (I’m sorry about the Echo and Fives one, okay? But they come as a package deal, and I also wanted to make sure that Echo is easily distinguishable from all the other clone characters and not just the average looking clone guy next to Fives who - by order of elimination - must be Echo), and everyone has a crest who needs one (except for maybe Barriss… I feel like that the Jedi order symbol doesn’t fully fit her, but for now I will keep it as a place holder. I can't come up with anything better for her at the moment T^T. The froggie returned to the “chtonic companions” line (it is exactly the plushie that Echo and Fives would give Grogu), and now there is Batcher too! If you notice any similarities between Batcher and Boba’s old rancor rag doll, it’s mostly because I took that one and modified it to fit the lurca hound, since they have a similar back ridge pattern.

I also think that it could be a cute in-universe thing if the Batcher doll had been modified from the rancor. Timelines are very flexible in this AU anyway, so it could be totally plausible.

Speaking of! I have a character sketch for Omega and Batcher!

It took me a while to settle on which version of Omega I wanted to put into this AU, but I am very happy with what I could come up with in the end. I had some trouble with what to do with her face, since Hades is really lacking in young teenage characters, and even Melinoe and Eris from Hades2 didn’t prove to be of much help, so I allowed a bit more of my own style to slip back in. With everything else I think it hit a nice enough balance. I mixed her s2 and s3 appearance into one outfit and gave her back her hat and old crossbow (I know she got a new one from Echo, but I prefer how this one sticks out over her shoulder).

This seems to be a girls’ update, since the next sketch I want to share concepts Bo-Katan and her Nite Owls! I’ve wanted to add them to this AU for ages, but all that armor and posing had just seemed too much of a hassle up until I had to seriously distract myself from some irl stress. So now I’ve got the trio to stand in for the fury sisters as first bosses. (I'll need to adjust Koska a little, I see it now)

God bless whoever’s decided to make one of those 30 cm action dolls of these guys, they had been so helpful when it came to looking up reference details! (While we are at details: I made Koska left handed (I think? Or opposite handed at the very least) because I had been coming up with their composition under the impression that she had her flame thrower in her right vambrace like Din and Boba do, which, upon further inspection, she does not ^^;)

Some in-universe thoughts regarding them: 1) Din can very much lose the Darksaber to whoever kicks his ass if he runs with is as his weapon of choice, and then has to return to reclaim it from that enemy (he doesn’t want to but they are in his way), and if he loses it either to her or another enemy Bo-Katan will most definitely have an opinion on the matter. 2) Boba is more than happy to swoop in as a “godly call” against Koska. If he has the option to claim the Call boon from Boba, it's a pretty good indicator that it will be Koska waiting for him at the end of the level. 3) After a while and enough encounters Axe starts showing up around and in the arena on this AU’s equivalent of the Elysium level. Paz would do anything not to have to talk about that minor detail. (Din: "Why does Axe Woves keep calling you baby girl?" Paz *steam escaping from the edge of his helmet* "how about we stop talking for a while." <- This meme has been on my mind for months, now you have to suffer it with me XD) After that it’s a boss fight of Din vs Paz and Axe.

This post is getting a bit long, so I will leave my progress with Obi-wan’s background to the next update. I will also make a separate post on the new little portrait icons, but I really liked how cute Rex and Omega looked next to each other in the big lineup Q^Q

*the only thing that made me dedicate myself to this decision with a heavy heart is that Fennec had been in the Bad Batch, and that would give me the ideal excuse to imagine her in a Hades2 inspired AU where she is helping Omega (as a stand in for Melinoe). I’ve thought a lot about this even before the test version of the game came out, and a lot of it would track now that I’ve seen some game play and story and characters but. Let’s not be delusional, I can barely keep up with this project, and the Hades2 art style, while super pretty, has a twist on the first game's art style that makes me want to cry when I think about replicating it ^^; so that just remains a nice little thought experiment.

Ventress went through the same thing, mostly because I think that in a strange way she would fit very well with Hecate's role. Especially after that s3 episode where she had her cameo with her new fancy haircut.

[the-anonymous-club]

So with the new Poppy Playtime chapter on the horizon, my rich!poppy au is on my brain, so here’s some sketches and some notes in the cut below!

• At the top is the physical differences between regular Poppy and Rich!Poppy. Poppy is vibrant, more well-kept and put together. And of course we can’t forget her terrifying bloodshot eyes! Rich on the other hand is more diluted and dark in hair color and has brown eyes. He’s generally unkempt and has a perpetual scowl. His eyes aren’t as bloodshot, but they do have severe eye bags (much like his old human body). He also has thicker brows. He made them that way probably with a permanent marker to reflect his original body and general pissed off demeanor (but can you really blame him?).

• Sketch of how I’m drawing the player for now. Unsure if I should make them their own distinct character or have them be sort of a Y/N character since we don’t know what they look like or who they are other than that they’re a previous Playtime Co. employee. Kinda just met in the middle, though things might change later.

• Sketch of what I picture Rich to look like as his regular middle-aged man self.

• To be honest I wish we got more helpful actions from Poppy. I love having a companion in game who helps out the player like in little Nightmares 2 or Portal 2, so I think Rich would do more to help us. Poppy is DEF giving villainous vibes as of the end of the 2nd chapter, but Rich would just want to get the hell out of dodge and see if there’s a way to get his old body back, or at least NOT be a toy anymore. Sure, he’d get to play damsel as well if we’re following major plot points, but for this au he’d be around more to give helpful commentary and quips.

• At the bottom there’s an alternate overalls outfit because I think it’s cute! It also might make Rich feel more at home in his current body. Lots of toy’s have varying outfits, so I’m taking inspiration from Chucky My Beloved and making a Working Gal Poppy! A discontinued version of the Poppy doll where she does some sort of labor job or gardening or something idk.

So there’s my thoughts for now! I have more stuff in mind to flesh this au out, so look forward to more coming soon!

[2-dsimp]

Hi! Can I get a sfw match up with the spin offs? Here's my info:

🩷Height: 5'0

🩷Age: 18

🩷Gender: Male (Ftm trans and a femboy :D)

🩷My passions: Art and music! ^^

🩷My hobbies: Drawing (both traditionally and digitally), singing, dancing (sometimes, I'm more of a low energy person most of the time), listening to music, playing with the stray cats my family takes care of or just watching them be idiots (affectionate)

🩷My profession: None yet but I plan to do something art related

🩷Other info: I'm very skinny to the point where I can actually feel my ribs through my shirt (I know how unhealthy that is and I've been trying to gain weight qvq), and I'm naturally flat, so I don't have to worry about top surgery or binders :D I have olive skin and I LOVE dressing in cute pastel pink and girly clothes <3 My Mbti is INFP and I am very very introverted, I like to keep my hair growing super long, the longest it has gotten recently is when it almost reached my hip level. I love animals and sweets. I have also been told by my friend that I'm quite naive, which is why I was oblivious to all the drama with my classmates (she was the one who told me about the beef everyone has with each other)

Thank you so much! ^^

(I love your content btw, I check your blog daily like it's newspaper and I'm a dad drinking coffee at the dinner table in the morning XD)

☆☆Yandere Gacha Match-up☆☆

【Recalibrating your results from the Spin-offs to be tailored fit to your Gacha Darling profile!】

Synchronization complete!

Congratulations! The Yandere Gachaman You’ve been matched with…

《Icha the Cultleader》

Icha is your ideal man, if you’re a very introverted person he’ll be your chihuahua companion to ward off anyone trying to invade your space or waste your time. Since he’s an introvert he understands what it’s like to be comfortable with keeping to yourself. Despite many people interpreting it as just being shy. When in reality he doesn’t want to mingle and just wants to be alone with his darling.

If you’re trying to gain weight then look no further. He’s an excellent cook and knows the science behind different food groups. Enough to know what your diet should entail for you to gain enough weight to your satisfaction.

Just be prepared for him to notify you the time to eat breakfast, lunch, dinner, and dessert. With no exceptions to your tardiness as he’s the type to cook a full course meal. Like a dedicated line chef making sure you’ve eaten your fill.

Given that the Cultleader’s hair is also somewhat on the long side he’ll jump to help you style your hair. Making it apart of his daily routine in dolling you up before you both head outside to go out and spend some quality time with one another.

Additionally he fully supports your passion of the arts. And would be happy to showcase his own sketches and drawings that he’s made of you amongst some well hidden summoning sigils/spell incantations/love spells.

————;———;———;——

A/n: o(≧v≦)o thank you!

[acourtofthought]

Elain's beauty is constantly noted by a lot of characters in ACOTAR. Some of them think she hasn't noticed how beautiful she is. Do you think said beauty causes Elain to struggle to connect with others? Or is it more than that?

Also, you can add how it affects her relationship with her sisters, her mate, and the court she currently resides in.

I think Elain is self aware enough to realize that her beauty is what prevents others from seeing her as capable and intelligent. When even her mother felt that at 11 the most she would have to offer is her beauty as a way to benefit their family, that even her mother did not feel she was made of anything of substance and did not dream beyond her gardens and dresses it's going to be something that sticks with you. That makes you realize early on how beauty can actually be a hindrance at times because people forget to look beneath the surface and I think when Elain learned this lesson at such a young age she probably noticed how others fell into that exact same pattern of thinking as her mother. I don't think Elain struggles to connect with others in terms of how she perceives them, Cassian noted that Elain had always seen everything Nesta had done and understood why and we saw Elain argue against Nesta to help Feyre because of all Feyre had done for them but I do think it has made others struggle to connect with Elain. I don't think they know how to connect with her because they don't understand her (which Elain is aware of because she tells Lucien no one ever truly looked at what is in her heart). As far as how this all affects her relationship with her sisters, I think we've seen it play out. Where Nesta assumes Elain is loyal like a dog and Feyre only thinks of her as a pleasant companion. When the canon evidence tells us that Elain does understand her sisters but they don't seem to understand her, that they have struggled seeing her a capable individual beyond baking and her gardens and they don't turn to her for anything (IC business, a friendly ear, etc.), it gives the impression that to most people Elain is a doll in a box, pretty to look at but you can't do much with it. I don't think Lucien falls into this category because he was the first and only person who spoke to her directly about her very major part in the war. He is the one who saw something inside of her that made him blush. He is the only one who we've seen her express sadness to over how others see her.

[a-court-of-lust-and-stardust]

Love on Ice Chapter 6: The Second Flashback

@chachachai17 and I hope you enjoy chapters 6 and 7 tonight ❤️

5 years ago, age 21

Elain applied a thin coat of lipstick and fluffed her hair once, checking herself in the mirror a last time before heading downstairs. She felt pretty, and allowed herself to feel a sliver of excitement. As she reached the bottom of the staircase, Elain decided nothing could tarnish her mood. 

On the floor in the living area, Feyre was surrounded by tubes of paint and an untouched canvas. She glanced at Elain, shooting a wink her way. “Where are you going all dolled up?”

Elain blushed and nodded her thanks. “It’s Laverna’s twenty-first birthday. She’s having a party at her home in the Dawn Region. She invited me the last time I saw her at the ice rink. I wasn't going to go but,” Elain rubbed her arm sheepishly. “I figured I might enjoy myself. I don’t plan on being out very long, though.” 

“Who else is going?” Feyre asked, squirting paint onto a glass pallete. She’d chosen a variation of pinks and golds and purples. Brushes were spread widely around the floorboards. 

“Aspen from Winter and Zarah from Spring. They're both ice dancers. We’re not really friends, but we talk once in a while. I thought I could get out of the house and have some fun before the competition tomorrow.” 

“You thought wrong,” Mama said, slinking into the living area with a steaming cup of tea. She didn't spare a glance toward Elain as she sat down on the sofa and said, “The only thing you're doing tonight is going upstairs, taking all of your makeup off, putting on your skating attire, and heading over to the rink for one last practice.” 

Elain and Feyre shared a look. 

“Mama, I haven't really made friends since we moved here,” Elain pointed out gently, ringing her fingers together. “These girls are nice to me and I would like to get to know them better.” 

"You do not need friends,” Mama said, eyes flashing to her face before landing on the television. Mama never looked at Elain for more than a few seconds at a time. 

“I think Elain deserves to build her own connections,” Feyre advocated quietly, spreading gold paint on the canvas. 

“Distractions,” Mama corrected sharply, kicking off her slippers, curling her legs underneath her bottom. The sisters flinched. “Friendships are distractions, and the last thing your sister needs is to be preoccupied.”

“I’m fully prepared for the competition tomorrow,” Elain defended, though her voice had grown shaky. Feyre’s gaze was one of pity. 

“You can never be too prepared,” Mama spat back. “Just this week, you fell during a twizzle. A twizzle! And look at what your sister is doing right now. She’s spending her weekend perfecting her craft. You don’t see her out and about with any companions, do you?”

“That's because they were all busy tonight,” Feyre muttered under her breath, pressing the brush harder against the canvas. 

“And Nesta has been at the studio for nine hours today and she’s still not home,” Mama remarked, sipping from her mug. “That is dedication. Something you surely lack.” 

Elain’s tears dampened her mascara, black streaks running down her rosy cheeks. So much for spending hours on making herself look beautiful. 

“Mama, Elain is one of the most dedicated people I know,” Feyre complimented, smiling sadly at her older sister. Elain shook her head, a silent plea for Feyre to stay quiet. Nothing either of them said would change Mama’s mind. 

Mama huffed, shaking her head. “Then that’s truly a shame,” She glanced toward Elain once more, face void of warmth. “Call your friends and tell them you are not coming. The rink closes in two hours, so you’d best get a move on. And don’t you ever pull a stunt like this again or else you’ll skate until your toes bleed.” 

And when Elain had changed into her sweater and leggings and flung her skating bag over her shoulder, she hadn’t bothered saying goodbye. 

ARTWORK FOR THE CHAPTER BY @chachachai17: Here

DIVIDER BY: @saradika-graphics

[this-sapphic-paradise]

Barbie starts dating and Gloria feels jealous, maybe even an eventual love confession

Hope you like it!

And let me know if I should write a follow up!

"Mom," Sasha's exasperated tone makes Gloria's hackles raise before she can even finish her sentence. "You *have* to put yourself out there again. It's been what, a year since you and dad divorced." The teen looked at Barbie for support, but doll-turned-human used her perfect poker face, staring straight ahead to avoid being pulled into the discussion. (One year in the real world had been enough time to learn some social cues.)

"Traitor," Sasha mock-whispered at Barbie.

"It's *only* been a year," Gloria corrected, busying herself with dinner. "I don't hear you nagging Barbie to start dating."

"That's because I am dating," Barbie supplied, hoping to be helpful. (Not *all* cues.)

Gloria almost dropped the pan she was holding in her haste to turn around. "You are?!"

The look of shock and... sadness? in Gloria's eyes confused Barbie. "Should I not be?"

"No, no..." Gloria shook her head and softened her features into a careful neutral face. "Of course you should. You should date as much or as little as you want, just-" a sad smile tugged on her lips, "don't let bad people harden your heart, okay?"

Sasha observed the exchange, looking from her mom to Barbie and then back again. *Okay...* She mouthed to herself, knowing it would go unnoticed by the two women who were staring lovingly at each other.

"Whatever. What's for dinner?"

------

It's not like Gloria hadn't tried to get back into the dating game. She had downloaded all the typical apps—Tinder, Bumble, Hinge—, she had even ventured on Plenty of Fish before she understood the error of her ways and deleted her account immediately. But the apps made her feel like she was shopping for people, leaving a bitter taste in her mouth, and so, she had deleted them.

What was left for her to do? She wondered, still thinking about Sasha's incessant request a week after the incident in the kitchen, getting cozy on the couch under a soft blanket to watch the latest cult documentary (a welcomed change from all the murder true crime shows she watched). She wasn't in her twenties anymore, she didn't want to go out partying every weekend, so where was she supposed to meet men her age? Did men her age even want to date women as old as them??

"You have that look on your face," Barbie commented, joining Gloria on the couch and shimming under the blanket to make herself warm.

"The look of a tired, working mother?"

Barbie grinned, having grown rather fond of Gloria's little sarcastic quips. "No, that look is beautiful," she said earnestly. "The look that something is bothering you."

Gloria shook her head, trying to ignore how Barbie's honest compliments always sank sharp teeth into her heart. She pressed play on the remote and she pretended to pay attention to it simply so she wouldn't have to look into those soul-searching eyes as she spoke. "How has dating been going for you?"

"Hm..." Barbie took a second to think. "I've been on seven dates since last week—"

"What?!?"

Barbie blinked. "One each night, basically."

"How can you afford that??"

She shrugged, "I never have to pay for anything. All the men and women I've seen insisted on paying for me."

Gloria was mid thought of 'Of course they are paying for you,' when it registered that Barbie had said she was going on dates with women too. It should have been obvious, really, that Barbie would see women as perfectly viable companions, but for some reason Gloria had never considered that for herself.

"And... which have you liked best, women or men?"

Barbie scrunched up her nose as she thought about it. "It's difficult to find any man here who is interested in more than my looks and many of them are terrible kissers—though I'm not sure I'm a good one myself-"

"Of course you are," Gloria interrupted without thinking about what she was saying.

"Can you tell just by looking at me?" Barbie asked, wondering if that was another human thing she still had to learn.

"Uh..." Gloria blinked a few times, trying to come up with a good explanation for that intrusive thought at the same time as she tried to comprehend why the thought of Barbie not being a good kisser felt like an affront to her.

"I-I just know that you're very intuitive and kind, and I'm sure someone like that would know how to kiss well," she explained, hoping it sounded like a well-thought-out reason.

Barbie beamed at that, taking Gloria's words at face value.

"So, yeah, I think I'm much more inclined to keep dating women than men. But no girl has invited me nor agreed to go on a second date."

Gloria frowned again. How was that possible?? "Have any of them told you why?"

"They said they couldn't get into another situationship with a woman who's living with her partner and her daughter." Barbie shrugged and continued, "I don't know why that's such a problem for them, but if they see it that way, then I'm better off."

"Barbie..." Gloria tilted her head, her heart melting. "They think you and I are dating, or that we are exes but still live together. That's why they don't want to get involved." She chuckled, but her chest ached a little. "We *are* partners, but not in the way they think."

"Oh! Well... that makes way more sense now," Barbie laughed and got more comfortable on the couch, unbothered by the fact that a misunderstanding might have cost her a few dates.

-----

Rollerblading had been something Gloria and Sasha had taken up as mother-daughter bonding activity and both truly cherished the moments they spent together (even though Sasha still put up a bit of front as it was expected of a teenager).

They were enjoying the breeze as they skated down their regular route when Gloria suddenly blurted out, "Would it be weird if I started seeing women?"

Sasha almost fell flat on her face—not due to the question, but the abruptedness of it. She eyed her mother with an unreadable expression for a few seconds before smirking and asking, "Women or Barbie?"

"What?!? No! I mean-"

"Mom," Sash laughed, grabbing her mother's hand. "Either is totally fine and not weird at all. I mean, it'd be *really* weird to have a real life Barbie as a step-mom, but-" she shrugged, "I've been waiting for you to realize you've been in love with her from the moment you laid eyes on her."

Gloria wanted to deny it, she wanted to say Sasha was mistaken, that she had still been in love with her ex husband when they met Barbie, but she knew she would be lying. All Gloria could do was thank the heavens for the fact that Sasha did not seem to be traumatized by the changes in their family.

"There's no step-mom just yet," Gloria said shyly, choosing to stay away from heavy topics for the time being. "Do you think she would go on a date with me?"

"Are you kidding me?" Sasha scoffed, rolling her eyes at her mom. "I've seen the way you too look at each other. I think it gave me literal cavities. It's disgusting, really."

Laughing at her daughter's dramatics, Gloria sighed and said, "I guess I'll ask her out then." Her heart soared with the possibilities the future held, and she could only hope Barbie would say yes.

[thedivineerotic]

The 4th House Experience Pt. 1:

(The Ugly Duckling)

Case Study: Lilo Pelekai

“Home is where the heart is.” - Anonymous

“Home is not where you live, it is where you belong.” - African Proverb

Out of all the water houses (4th, 8th and 12th), the 4th house is given the least amount of attention in online astrology circles, ironic considering that is the only one of the three houses to also serve as an angular house. It doesn’t share the dark, esoteric reputation that makes the 8th and 12th houses such popular houses, but just because it deals with relatively “lighter” topics such as family, the home, ancestry, roots and history doesn’t mean that it isn’t deep. As a matter of fact, one could argue that it is the deepest of the water houses seeing that it is the only one below the horizon. When I first delved into astrology, admittedly the 4th house was not one that garnered much of my attention and for a while I actually considered it one of the more boring of the astrology houses but upon further growth, study and reflection the depths of it became very apparent.

And they were presented perhaps no better than the little girl whose character won me over more than any Disney princess both as a kid and now. 

The movie lilo and stitch ironically starts with Lilo swimming in the depths of the ocean. She rushes from the beach to make it to her hula dancing lesson. Upon getting there she is immediately singled out for being late, being wet and the seemingly strange explanation of why she had to feed the fish Pudge a peanut butter sandwich as he has control of the weather. Her instructor nor the other girls in the class understand the reasoning behind why her routine with Pudge the fish is so important and ostracize her, with the defacto leader of the small girls’ group Myrtle going as far as to call her “crazy.”

And immediately getting her ass beat because of it.

Unfortunately Lilo is ostracized by her peers, robbed of a sense of belonging from a very young age. Aside from her sister, her sole sense of belonging comes from her doll “Scrump” whose appearance scares the other girls and further causes her to feel like a misfit. 

Later in the story we get the explanations to her seemingly strange behavior, we see that her Tuesday routine with Pudge and the importance of him controlling the weather comes because her parents died while driving in the rain. Her being nostalgic and an old soul sets her apart, her favorite artist being Elvis Presley. She latches onto “Scrump” because she is lonely and has no friends. She makes a wish on what she thinks is a shooting star and prays for a friend (wishes being an 11th house theme) and she is sent Stitch, an alien posing as a pet dog, fitting considering pets are a 6th house theme and the 4th house being 6 spaces from the 11th house. Although he too is different, something that uneases her older sister Nani almost immediately, and does not seem like a normal dog, Lilo embraces him from the very beginning, again speaking to Lilo’s nature to offer other misfits a sense of belonging like she herself doesn’t have.

The two misfits go on a series of adventures around the island, but even in that we can still see Lilo’s desperation to belong as she apologizes and still attempts to befriend the girls who have bullied her and treated both herself and Stitch as pariahs. 

Later in their adventures we see them eating at Nani’s job. The 4th house is representative of the sign of Cancer, opposite of the 10th house which is representative of the sign of Capricorn. Nani displays many themes of the 10th house, tirelessly bouncing from job to job to provide for Lilo and although she initially wanted to fulfill Lilo’s wish and give her a companion, Stitch threatens her job search and the already flimsy structure of their house so much that she can’t afford the sympathy in gifting him a sense of belonging like Lilo can. She is just about to throw Stitch out of the house when Lilo brings up a quote from her deceased parents, Ohana. 

“Ohana means family…”

Despite being a young girl, Lilo is very attached to the memory of her parents, keeping a picture of them underneath her pillow. She also keeps a physical book copy of the “The Ugly Duckling”. In it she explains the story of a baby duckling that is sad because “he’s been left behind by his family and nobody wants him. But they hear him crying and they find him and now he is happy because he knows where he belongs.”

The night when Stitch threatens to run away, he takes her copy of the Ugly Duckling with him. Lilo tries her best to convince him to stay, fearing losing the only friend other than Nani that she has ever had. When he still leaves, though disappointed she says that she will still never forget him as she “never forget anyone who leaves” before looking at the family picture with her parents again and tucking it back underneath her pillow. 

The next morning Stitch comes back, trying to escape capture. Naturally she misses her friend and helps him to evade from Jumba and Pleakly trying to arrest him, even going so far as to sacrifice her doll “Scrump” to blow up in the latter’s face. Things unfortunately go too far when their literal house ends up being blown up. When Stitch finally reveals himself to be an alien, she feels betrayed, as if Stitch took advantage of her need for belonging with his need to escape (the 4th house and 9th house themes again being at odds as the 9th house is 8 spaces from the 4th house, the 8th house signifying deception and destruction). When she is taken instead of Stitch she feels defeated, fearing losing her older sister and her home of Hawaii, she officially belongs to nothing.

Someone that gave her a sense of belonging has left her behind once again.

Finally at the end, upon being rescued and securing Stitch as her pet and best friend for good, Lilo has finally found her sense of belonging. Despite being robbed of a life with her parents, her natural family, she is able to find a family, a tribe, one made up of her older sister along with fellow misfits and aliens just like her.

No one got left behind and no one got forgotten.

As a 4th Houser, depending on the conditions of the house, your sense of belonging has likely fluctuated throughout your life. No one knows to highs a sense of belonging brings and the low a sense of not belonging brings like you. 

You may some severe abandonment issues and may have fought to be included, to feel you belong in circles where others were seemingly accepted easily. And if you have it, you fought hard not to loose it.

But in the end, you stop fighting to belong and another alien, or group of aliens, find you.

So even if people have left you in some circles, even if people have pushed you out of others, here's to finding and holding tight to your own “Ohana”.

And keeping onto those memories along the way!

Signed, The Divine Erotic (4th House Moon)

[selfproclaimedunicorn]

Bfsjfjajri, this took forever because I get so, so distracted so easily. But here's that sweet, sweet lore @corporalicent

Daenys Targaryen is Rhaenyra's sister who's younger than her by a year. She is soft & feminine & girly & she very much revels in the trappings of being a girl as a sort of rebellion against their dad being disappointed in her not being that sweet, sweet son by Aemma he keeps pining for. It allows her a sense of freedom because it let's people just kind of beigningly ignore her due to "oh she does what she's supposed to." It's equal parts "I like this," & "I can manipulate people this way." Weaponized I'm Soft And Girly And Prone To Hysterical Irrational Emotions.

Her companion & bestie is Lyonel Strong’s youngest daughter, Cassana, & she also winds up starting a secret relationship with Tyland Lannister that culminates in a secret wedding. There's also the Targaryen Weirdness that comes from "I only have same gender siblings" she has to deal with for a bunch of her life & never really goes away even after the Targtower boys are born because, well, Daenys is 14 when Aegon is born. The pressure is off at that point, but her & Rhaenyra both still have to contend with "if one of us was a boy we'd be married, but we aren't so what are we?" Their arc together is going to be very heartfelt & I'm hyped for the feels of "what do I do without an older brother to marry like I'm supposed to?"/"I'm glad Rhaenyra is my sister so I can dream about hunky boys & kiss Tyland without feeling guilty"

Also, I don't get to talk about it a lot, but she is a dragon rider & I made her baby special for her. Her dragon is purple/blue/pink & named "Windscream." Very femme, very girly, this is what Daenys deserves: a dragon that compliments her eyes.

She & Tyland have boocoo kids. Like, 6 or 7? I keep debating one of them, but they have 5 girls & at least 1 boy at the end (Aemma, Jonquil, Genna, Alysanne, Vaella, & Tybolt for sure. MAYBE Gerion).

Also, also I am letting @murmel-malt borrow my girl Daenys as one of her OC Hedaera's kids. Because friendship is trading your OCs around like Barbie dolls

Aldreda Farwynd is my chaotic, bisexual, selkie coded, pirate queen, seal mommy & I adore her so. She's the last living child of Lord Alfric Farwynd of Lonely Light & she is stuck in a succession crisis of her own because of this. She had 20-something brothers that all died at various points in her life, with the one she's fully related to (Alfric has 5 wives) dying before she was even born. Her brothers in order (and with their death details) are as follows:

Euron: died at 35 on a raid

Ronas: died in the cradle before Aldreda was born

Barrian: died at 32 on a raid [same raid as Euron]

Theon: died at 28 from an oral infection that spread

Faren: sailed further west at age 22 & was never seen again, presumed dead

Edgard: sailed west with Faren at age 18, presumed dead

Coren: died at 22 while sailing home due to being caught in a bad storm

Orwen: died at 20 while sailing home, caught in the same storm as Coren

Randar: died at 17 while sailing home, caught in the same storm as Coren & Orwen

Winfirth: died of the shivers at age 3

Trystifer: died at 14 after drunkenly falling from the top of one of Lonely Light's towers

Sigeric: murdered at 15 during a physical altercation about bedding the prettiest girl at Lonely Light

Vernyn: sailed east to try & explore Valyria's ruins at 16

Ulfric: died of a burst belly/ruptured appendix at age 9

Alwin: died at 13 due to an infection from poorly treated wounds

Waeland: mortally wounded at age 12 during a spar with real weapons

Uther: drowned at age 8

Marlyn: slipped & cracked his head open at age 7

Hubert: died in the cradle

Rhys: murdered by poison at his 6th name day

Her dad & his 2 brothers are a whole Thing, but the tl;dr is that Alfric & his full brother are the sons of a Salt Wife, & their brother (the son of their dad's Rock Wife) thinks he is entitled to Lonely Light more than "his dumb, older half-brother with a mainland mom." This gets imparted onto his oldest son, Westley, who is the grossest & most insidious man in the Iron Islands. He manipulates & grooms Aldreda for close to 2 decades before revealing how awful he is by trying to take her claim. Their altercation drives her away from home, putting her in position to become Aegon II's Master Of Ships during The Dance: something Aldreda does in exchange for a royal decree that inheriting Lonely Light is hers by right (following the Andal succession laws Aegon’s claim banks on).

She's 5-ish years younger than Alicent, & their relationship is...it is something. Initially for Aldreda it's "why shouldn't I fuck this hot, obvious lesbian? Don't I deserve comfort?" & for Alicent it's her finally getting egged on to do something with her own desires. They proceed to become each other's character development girlfriends who have actual feelings for each other beyond "this is for me & my pleasure." I'm still debating endings & major events beyond emotional growth arcs, but I know that Aldreda 100% kills at least one person for Alicent’s safety, & that they trade jewelry as part of Aldreda’s weird, fucky Ironborn "we belong to each other" thing. The mutual ownership thing is very important to Aldreda (& the mutual part is part-and-parcel with her growth. It would have just be a "it's about me having you" thing without the growth).

Their relationship is very "we didn't 'fix' each other, we just made each other the better version of who our lived experiences turned us into." Because "fixing" each other would honestly be inauthentic & it would amount to covering Aldreda in way less blood, & that's not very Sexy Pirate of her to not be covered in blood

[kumeko]

A/N: For the @violeteverzine! I wanted to dig a little more into Clara’s story, it was so heartbreaking and I love the idea of leaving letters for the future, for those who miss you to help ease their pain and tell them all the things you’ll never have the time to.

…

…

…

…

By the eight letter, Clara Magnolia’s voice faltered. It surprised her, a little, that she had managed to make it so far, that her aching body had carried her voice for as long as it had. When she’d first paid for this commission, she’d been afraid. There was so much she wanted to say and so little time to do it. Even now, they still had six days to go and yet another forty letters to dictate.

And her body would only get worse with time. Fortunately, her daughter Ann wasn’t peeking inside the window like she usually did—seeing Clara like this would have only made her worry. There was no time to reassure her.

As she rubbed her throat, her companion looked up from her typewriter and impassively regarded her.  Even for a Doll, there was something remarkably doll-like about Violet Evergarden, from her soft blonde hair to her distant blue-green eyes. Her delicate prosthetic fingers gleamed silver in the light as she paused. “Do you need a break?”

“A little,” Clara admitted ruefully, leaning back in her wicker chair. Bright green plants infused her sitting room with a show of life that she just didn’t feel. Picking up her tea, she wrinkled her nose as she sipped the now-cooled liquid. “I should have drank this earlier.”

“I can make you a new one,” Violet offered, her expression unchanged. It was hard to tell if she was asking out of concern or politeness.

“No, that’s fine.” Clara set down her tea once more. “Besides, I’m sure your fingers need to rest too. It must have been difficult, keeping up with my rambling thoughts.”

“No, that…that was fine.” An unreadable expression flickered across Violet’s face as she looked down at the stack of papers next to her. Her silver fingers lightly touched the sheets. “How many letters are you planning on writing?”

“As many as I can,” Clara answered honestly. With the condition her body was in, that was all she could promise. It had taken her time to save enough money to hire a Doll to write her letters, especially over the span of a week, and she knew she had to make the most of it. Even now, she could feel herself dying, her breath clawing its way out of her chest. “Forty, at least. Seventy, if I’m lucky.” She chuckled, her fingers gripping her chair tightly, the stray wicker cutting into her skin. “Forever, if I could.”

Violet tapped the paper again. Inquisitively, she asked, “Do you have a lot to say?”

Clara stared at Violet, surprised by the frankness of the question. After a moment, she laughed, a short bark that her father used to love. Another thing she had to add to the letter—the memories of a grandfather Ann would never meet. “I do. I think we all do, no matter what age we are. There’s always something more you want to tell the ones you love, always something else you need them to know.”

She picked up the closest envelope, its contents already sealed inside. Her fingers pressed against a coin stuck in the letter—it was a family tradition to give a silver coin on a child’s tenth birthday. One day, Ann would give it to her own daughter. “I’m just lucky I have a chance to put it all down on paper. Too many disappear or die without saying goodbye.”

Violet’s lips parted. Her head bowed slightly, her bangs hiding her eyes, but Clara had lived long enough to recognize a pained expression when she saw one. “It is hard,” Violet murmured, her fingers curling on her lap. “When they don’t say anything. When you can’t ask.”

Who are you thinking of? Clara almost asked, but the war was still fresh, and Violet’s prosthetics were obvious. Everyone lost someone in a hail of bullets and fire, in the bombs that had hung over their heads precariously. Even someone as young as Violet hadn’t been untouched by it all.

“It’s painful,” Clara agreed instead. She could almost see Ann in the teenager in front of her, hurt and alone. “I don’t think there is any way to stop that. There will always be unanswered questions. Unsaid things.”

Violet looked up, her expression calm once more. “Is that why you’re writing so many?”

It took Clara a moment to realize Violet was talking about the letters. She lowered her gaze to the letter in her hands, her fingers still pressed against the coin. “Partially.”

“Partially?” Violet cocked her head, perplexed.

“It might be a little vain of me,” Clara admitted, setting aside the letter as she picked up another. She could smell the flowers inside, the roses and sweet peas pressed to a page as a reminder of the greenhouse. By the time Ann got it, would she remember the other flowers that bloomed? Or would these pressings be the only survivors in her memory? “After I die, all Ann will have are her memories of me and these letters.  The memories will fade, but these letters…I hope they last. I hope she’ll have them for the years to come.”

“If…” Violet paused, hesitant. She brushed her hair behind her ear. “How do you know what to tell her?”

“I don’t,” Clara answered honestly. Death made her frank in ways her life hadn’t. “I’m trying to summarize my entire life and the life we could have had together. It’s hard to pick what to say. Anything I don’t…will be lost forever.”

Stories of her grandparents. Clara’s own memories. The way she spoke, the foods she made—even with the recipe cards she’d prepared for Ann’s eighteenth birthday, there would be so many more dishes abandoned to the stream of time. The only parts of their family, the only parts of Clara that would live on would be whatever Ann knew, whatever Ann shared.

“I suppose...I’m just picking the important things.”

Violet’s eyes widened. Her right hand clutched the green jewel pinned to her cravat. She wet her lips and breathed, “The important things?”

Clara smiled softly. “Anything that can give her my love. She’ll be lonely, but she won’t be alone.” She picked up another letter. This one had a ribbon inside, a gift for Ann’s fifteenth birthday. At that age, she’d probably have a crush or two. At that age, she’d need advice more than ever. Clara’s throat burned, filled with everything she’d never say. “I hope these words, these letters, will be there for her when I’m not.”

It was impossible, she was sure, to infuse her life into ink and parchment, to pour every ounce of her being into a hundred, even a thousand letters.

But she wanted to. She needed to.

Violet clenched her jaw, that unreadable expression back in her eyes. Her finger brushed the jewel once more. This time, when she spoke, it was with a quiet confidence. “They will be.”

It was a kind response, a polite answer, but something in Clara eased regardless. “Thank you.” Sitting up once more, she cleared her throat. “Shall we continue, then?”

“Of course.” Violet smiled briefly, her fingers already hovering over the typewriter.

Despite all that lay ahead, Clara knew her messages, her love would reach her daughter. Her gaze flickered to Violet’s pendant.

Hopefully, whoever Violet was thinking of, their messages, their love would reach Violet too.

Leaning back in her seat, Clara pictured her daughter as a bubbly, confident teenager, making the most of her gangly arms and confusing feelings. It was easy, so easy, to think about what she wanted to tell this future Ann.

“Dear Ann, happy sixteenth birthday! I’m sure you’ve gotten so big by now. Hopefully you’re taller than me. Sixteen is a special milestone, so I want to leave you something special in the envelope. It’s a pin your grandmother gave to me.”

Clara unclipped the pin on her chest, a bright, cheerful yellow pansy. Brushing its petals, she closed her eyes.

“Maybe one day, you’ll give it to your daughter and tell her stories about me.”

In her mind’s eye, she could see Ann grow, from sixteen to twenty to thirty, from child to woman to mother. At forty, her hair tied up in a bun and laugh lines showing her age as she pinned the pansy to her own daughter’s chest.

Ann looked up, her eyes still as bright as a child’s, and smiled at Clara. She mouthed, Message received.

She mouthed, I love you.

Clara opened her eyes, returning to the greenhouse and her letters. To the small Ann, still years from receiving the letter, still sullenly wondering what was happening. Violet looked at her expectantly.

She smiled. “Dear Ann, I know this is a scary time, full of changes, but everything will be okay.”

[gctchell]

anonymous asked: I can just imagine the potential au out of that niffty alastor Pic you posted.

Anon my brain has been buzzing ever since I saw it this morning, my GOD. The potential is JUICY.

"They say the family you choose is better." I thought this moment was a gross oversight and they completely forgot Niffty, because she is tiny and you can fit her just about anywhere - she'd fit perfectly above Alastor's head. But now that I've seen this little delicious piece of fanart, I'm wondering if it might have been intentional after all! Because Niffty is such a good family member to involve in moments like this, yet..

Also, these little dolls. Originally I assumed they were related to Alastor's practice, but getting a closer look at them.. They're a little cutesy, aren't they? Alastor summons brutal tentacles and shadow creatures that seem more fitting for his personal aesthetic, but then he also summons these little devil doll helpers that feel a little out of place. I'm not saying they couldn't fit him, especially with the dapper aesthetic, but looking at this new theory it feels more like Niffty's style, especially when you look at the expressions.

I can just envision Niffty sitting in her room stitching these things to life. I can see it so clearly.

I've been part of conversations that have thrown around the notion that Niffty is actually an Overlord, as well. In the Pilot, she was right there in the casting of the Overlords alongside Husk, who WE have found out is also an Overlord. There's also this neat Twitter post pointing out she has been in multiple imagery that I did not even notice!

ANYWAYS.

My brain is buzzing with scenarios where Niffty is an Overlord;

What the Hell is going to put Alastor within a deeply binding deal to another? This person has to be pretty damn powerful, wouldn't you think? Or in the least, incredibly crafty and clever. This man is BOUND to whoever has him on a leash and it is driving him up the wall. Before Niffty came down in the 50s, he's been kicking around in Hell since the 30s, he has some time under his belt and he has some experience.. So, what does this upstart have to offer?

Well, what if Niffty was a demonologist & worshipper in life and like him, came down to Hell experienced in a different walk of life? She knew exactly where she was going to wind up and she was polished, excited. This is her chosen afterlife and she adores it. She was ready, and there's nothing quite like a soul who embraces her afterlife with full awareness and embodiment of herself. She knows what she's doing, she knows how Hell works, she is expertly versed in it and an infernal academic. She starts ranking up as she pulls souls beneath her belt (how, I don't know just yet!).

Alastor is the kind of guy who is like 'game recognizes game' and he is quickly enticed by her! She's pleasant enough as a personality, and she's delightfully upbeat to boot. They're both from the Golden Age, so there's some relatability there, as well. Meanwhile, she knows who he is. Niffty is obsessive; she knows all the bad boys that are on the map (and even some who are off), and she knows he's a dealmaker. She's not new to deals, either - she made plenty with various sorts of the damned while she was alive.

Her side of the deal is very simple: You be my special companion, and I'll lend you my power. We'll be so happy together!

Niffty struggles to make friends. She loves hard, but she has a personality that can be seen as completely obnoxious and off-putting, driving people away. She's a chatterbox who can go on and on and on, and Alastor is also a chatterbox who can go on and on and on. That lonely heart of hers clutches this opportunity like a fucking knife and drives the needle home in sewing her deal into Alastor's skin, her way of lending him power, but also binding him so damn fiercely to her there is no breaking it. It's a deal. We're friends forever and always.

This is something that does not really grate on him too much as the arrangement is quite profitable and does not really weigh on him, it's in his favor. She tags along wherever he goes and he has power. Yet, prideful creature that he is, he is starting to feel the pull of the deal as he is woven tight to the hotel.

Why is he tied to the hotel if the one who has the contract is Niffty? Well, Niffty longs for friends, and who loved her people? Lilith. Who is going to accept her and support her? Lilith. Who is Niffty going to be loyal to in return? Lilith.

Lilith blips out of the picture for seven years, and coincidentally, so does Alastor. What if Niffty went MIA for all this time, as well? Whatever happened wove them in tight with the Happy Hotel, and Niffty now has an obligation to Charlie - Lilith's daughter. Who has a better shot of being the more charismatic personality that can weave them into the picture more seamlessly? Alastor.

In Episode 8, we see Alastor finally forming something of a soft spot for the group and he has this tender moment with Niffty, confiding in her this truth. It's very sweet. Then later, after barely surviving Adam, Alastor almost died because of this sentimental attachment bullshit. No way, that's not how he is going to go out. He needs to get out of this deal with Niffty somehow, someway, he just doesn't know how yet.

Niffty is very clingy, as well. She said forever, and she meant forever.

[saintsenara]

nor all that glisters gold sirius black & bellatrix lestrange teen | 8.8k words

an understanding dawns between them. despite their age gap, they recognise in each other a shared capacity for cruelty. they know their blood runs with a shared desire to see other people get hurt, a shared need for pain.

he treasures it.

when he was a child, sirius wanted nothing more than to follow in the footsteps of his favourite cousin. this desire will not last.

this piece was written for @womenofthehouseofblack fest [you can find the other fics in the collection here].

author's notes below the cut

sirius and bellatrix’s relationship is an area of canon which i find fascinating. the two are set up in the narrative as being extremely similar - right down to the fact that they both die laughing - in personality [and, of course, in appearance - the description of sirius in this fic as having brown eyes comes from a desire to emphasise that physical similarity; i know that jkr has said he has grey eyes, i’m just ignoring her…].

above all, both of them have two incredibly contradictory aspects to their personalities: they can be incredibly cruel; and they are astonishingly loyal.

and in this, bellatrix serves to emphasise something which i think is the standout aspect of sirius’ role in the harry potter series - what he says about the value of choice. i’ve written about this in more detail in the notes for lux aurumque, a sirius-focused one-shot i published recently, but the summary is that i am very uncomfortable with portrayals of sirius which undermine the significance of choice - and, in particular, the choice to defy your family in an extremely lineage-based society - in order to suggest that he feels more comfortable within the world of his birth than with james and the life he chooses to make for himself. lux aurumque deals with several of the choices referred to in this piece - particularly the idea that sirius asks the sorting hat to place him in gryffindor - in more detail.

it was important to me in nor all that glisters gold to draw out the idea that sirius’ discomfort with his social class starts early. he dislikes the pureblood friends his mother wants him to make, and the boring activities he is supposed to do to demonstrate his class background. he loves his cousins - his closest childhood companions - but when faced with the reality of what they are becoming as the first war rears its head, he knows what he has to do.

because bellatrix, of course, makes a different choice.

nor all that glisters gold is an examination of something which i am certain must have been a key aspect of bellatrix’s radicalisation, but which is absent from a lot of analysis about her: that she is someone who, from childhood, wishes to escape the gendered expectations of her social class. here, as in the three sisters [author’s notes here], another piece i’ve written for this fest, she talks about wanting to be a warrior like other girls talk about wanting to be a wife; and loathes the ephemera of girl-hood like dolls and tea-parties. in this, she is very much in contrast to narcissa, whose conformity to the expectations of her gender is explored in my narcissa-centric piece other women and of purer blood [author’s notes here].

one of the key gendered expectations that bellatrix chafes against is, obviously, marriage. [which is also something clearly rejected by sirius as well.]

that purebloods practise arranged marriage is implied by canon - sirius’ statement in order of the phoenix that pureblood parents who wish their children to marry other purebloods take an interest in choosing from the pool of eligible candidates tells us that - and wizards regardless of blood-status seem to marry far earlier than muggles [james and lily marry at nineteen, for example, and we can identify multiple other women in the series who seem to be married when they are between the ages of 18 and 21].

[an important aside, of course, is that arranged marriages and forced marriages are not the same thing. arranged marriage is practised all over the world, and many arranged marriages are complete and loving successes. lucius and narcissa were very probably an arranged marriage; they also obviously adore each other. bellatrix’s issue is not that she objects to this particular way of bringing about a marriage, but that she doesn’t want to be married full stop.]

because there’s nothing wrong with rodolphus - they get along well enough, and he isn’t cruel or abusive - they just don’t click as husband-and-wife. and this only serves to increase her feeling of being trapped in a gendered cage which she wants to escape.

and we all know who helps her with that…

several commenters have noted that the characterisation of bellatrix in this piece as quite naive - and also as acting young for her age and being rather girly - is quite an unusual one. partially, i like this portrayal of her because the harry potter series has such a tendency to assign femininity to wives and mothers [such as narcissa], and to suggest that women who aren’t those things are in some way unfeminine, but i also think that reading her like this - and the hints of it are there in her behaviour in canon; the desperate way she talks to voldemort in the dark lord ascending, blushing when he looks at her, is one of them - provides an interesting insight into her radicalisation.

because all the implication of canon is that bellatrix becomes a death eater when she’s very young [meaning that the same naivety about what that means that we see with regulus and draco can also be meaningfully attributed to her], which means that - whether or not you believe her relationship with voldemort is sexual [I do] - she is being groomed when she’s barely out of school by a man who is in his late forties. indeed, in nor all that glisters gold, i stick to my long-standing headcanon that their sexual relationship starts when she’s only seventeen, and that voldemort is the first person she ever sleeps with.

and, in this, we can see the complexity of bellatrix’s radicalisation - because voldemort clearly has an enormous amount of power over her [as sirius notes, he dictates how she dresses and she begins to parrot his beliefs; she gets engaged and married, essentially, at his command - probably because he wants something from her father-in-law], but she also wholeheartedly believes in his causes. she is a blood-supremacist, and would be with or without him. she is capable of great and ruthless violence before she meets him - indeed, this is the reason voldemort bothers to groom her in the first place.

and voldemort also offers her a chance to escape the gendered confines in which she lives. with his objection to early marriage ages and loveless unions, he’s a bit of a girlboss in this, which might seem out of character; but i do think it’s justifiable on the basis of his canon portrayal that he’s someone who has no real interest in the maintenance of traditional social structures [what he does like, here and in other women and of purer blood is the idea that he has the right to dictate the social order, and to be heavily involved in his followers’ lives]. after all, he himself exists outside of the class structures which define the wizarding world, and he clearly rejects the expectation that this should be something he aspires to [he refuses slughorn’s job offers entirely because he wants a job he got himself, for example]. he’s also someone whose physical description - especially the way he speaks and moves - implies a certain degree of effeminacy, and i am incredibly convinced by the idea that he can be read as trans or genderqueer.

which is to say that i have always had the headcanon that bellatrix falls so heavily for him because he is one of the few men she knows who is willing to support her desire to live a life of her own making, outside the social expectations placed upon her.

and this, i think, is one of the things that the sirius of this piece is not entirely able to understand - after all, he frees himself from the world which constrains him.

sirius’ jealousy of voldemort is something which has stood out to multiple commenters, and i think this is partially triggered by the fact that he himself retains more gendered influences than he may believe. i’m always struck in canon, for example, about the way he talks about the duty barty crouch sr. should have had towards his family - and while i don’t think that this would make him the character i’ve criticised above, who thinks his family is more important than his choice, this expectation drives his anger in nor all that glisters gold at how bellatrix and narcissa don’t stick by andromeda.

[on whom: i often find that andromeda is written as being quite stuck-up, as though all of tonks’ vibrant canon personality comes from ted. that she is exactly like her daughter in this piece was important to me.]

because this piece is, of course, also about the black family more generally. in particular, it builds on a theme in lamentation [author’s notes here], another piece i’ve written for this fest, that walburga suffers from postnatal depression. the fairies and changeling imagery appears across both of these pieces - as the images of elder trees, also associated with fairies and widely considered to be unlucky, do across this and the three sisters. regulus is a minor character, but he does appear as an example of something which i think must have contributed to the canonical tension readable between sirius and dumbledore - that sirius knows who voldemort is probably recruiting, and how, but sees that dumbledore appears to be doing nothing to stop it.

[finally, i can never give up the headcanon that sirius has an aspen wand. they are protective trees, often planted near houses for safe-keeping, and the connection between this and the role of secret keeper…? stunning.]