#but I’m already 21
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in my considering whether or not to go to medical school era
#medical school#???#I never thought I would consider this#but after watching#ghost doctor#I suddenly want to be a surgeon#I even watched three surgery videos the other night#might go watch some more now because they’re interesting#but I’m already 21#I’ve already been in college for 3 years#studying LINGUISTICS#granted#it is actually very beneficial for a doctor to understand many languages#but I’d have to do like#13 more years of schooling#that sounds miserable#but also the idea of becoming a surgeon is sooo tantalizing#like oh boy that would be cool#then I could say I’m a woman in STEM#but also a woman who knows languages#but also a woman who can sing and dance#what if I want to be an idol and a doctor at the same time#it wouldn’t work very well#but if people liked me enough#it might#I’m thinking about#love me love my voice#and how he was both a doctor and also did dubbing#dubbing would be fun#imagine
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These are so shitty but I am compelled by my newly found Trekkie instincts to post them.
#two days of being into Star Trek and I’m already 21 episodes into TOS#star trek fanart#star trek#star trek tos#star trek the original series#Spock#james t kirk#Jim Kirk#Star Trek doodles#kirk x spock
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I’m watching the men’s fs replay and oh my god can we please start banning certain songs from seniors??? I should not be hearing the nutcracker suite
#Vladimir you are 21 AND YOUVE ALREADY DONE THIS#THRICE IN FACT#I’m begging and pleading#figure skating
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Literally me when I’m in my 20s
#veesaysthings#dungeon Meshi#chilchuck tims#I don’t doubt for a second that he’s 29. I think this will literally be me when I’m 29.#I’m 21 and I already feel like this is me in my minds eye
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might have a parisian girl era soon. we’ll see
#uncle who lives in belgium knows i graduated a year early + currently studying for the mcat#and he’s practically begging me to visit him in belgium and study there#and belgium is only around 2 hours away from paris so you best believe id be taking the train there every day#the thing is i study full time & only have a minimal part time job on the side so he and my mom would have to foot that bill#and idk i’d feel so bad. i’m already so spoiled. like i never had to work a day in my life but im 21#it’s very much in arab culture to spoil the daughters like this but still !!!#it just feels like i have to put my big girl pants on and start saving + relying on myself more & more when it comes to that#so that’s probably what i’ll be doing. plus i have research + my neuro internship here and i cant just drop that#but once i get a research publication in a few months + save up my own money im seriously considering j putting myself on a plane & going#i’m sure he and my mom would have no problem paying but it feels wrong. this is one thing i rly wanna pay upfront myself i think#but if i do manage to pull it off it’d be so cool bc i rly wanna see him#and i rly wanna bust out the 8 years i have in french#p
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officially moved out of my moms house and into my friends house with her and her kids. a sense of community and actual safety feels so foreign to me. gonna miss my mom though, but a fresh start to get my shit together sounds even nicer
#I have no idea what to do with myself here#it’s gonna take some time getting used to but I’m already loving it#mom says she doesn’t think I can do it so out of spite I’m gonna show her I can be without her oof#I’m 21 the control issues with her gotta STOP#I had to break FREE I AM FREE!!#ang.txts
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Sorry… no robots today. But hey! Let’s look at some side-character humans from my continuity!
From left to right it goes: Priscilla Pynch - Frankie Greene - Cece Greene - Rusty Clay - Sawyer Storm
And let me know if you guys wanna know more about them.
#hehehe I made them gurlfriens☺️☺️#I honestly have no idea how old rusty is compared to Frankie Cody or Priscilla#so I decided that C F and P are all either 20 or 21 and Rusty is 15 while Cece is about 6#and I’m just now realizing how damn long I keep making their arms#if you guys already know who sawyer is then I applaud you#tf fan continuity#transformers bold bright brisk#priscilla pynch#frankie greene#cece greene#rusty clay#sawyer storm#my art#maccadam#transformers#maccadams
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*checks new follower*
i wonder what it’s like to live in such blissful ignorance
#rambles.#like. do you just not read?#or do you just choose to ignore it?#genuinely i need to know the thought process#i’m this 🤏🏻 fucking close to saying 21+ only for this blog#minus all the people who are already here and i trust#because the lack of brain development in the vast majority is giving me dementia as a result
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the fact that people around my age are getting engaged is INSANE
#i know i shouldn’t be one to judge bc i’m a single pringle#but like#y’all are 21 22 23 years old and y’all already thinking about MARRIAGE#meanwhile i’m thinking about how tomorrow’s gonna go#i just feel like this generation (especially people in relationships) are rushing everything#I SWEAR THAT Y’ALL HAVE TIME#Y’ALL ARE IN COLLEGE#JUST ENJOY WHERE YOU ARE NOW#idk it just doesn’t sit right with me#i’m not trying to come off as unsupportive or anything but it’s just so early in adulthood that i’m like#what the fuck are you guys doing LMAO#ok anyway#that’s all i had to say#only because i saw an IG post today from a girl that goes to my university and she got engaged to her boyfriend in disney world#girlie you’re 21😭#AND SHE LITERALLY BOUGHT A FREAKIN HOUSE WITH HIM#MY MOM WOULD KILL ME IF I DID THAT#idk if anyone else is noticing this but again#it might just be me#just had to get this off my chest#abby’s announcements#<-i guess
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#20/05/2024#into 21/05/2024#Istanbul#enjoying his well deserved break#he looks so unbelievably happy 🫶🏽🫶🏽🫶🏽💕💕#silly goose#the fact that he’s still wearing the Max bracelet 😭#partymaus#happy smiley Miles#no but the fact that the pic with the bloke looks like ‘two drunk happy friends taking a pic during night out’ while the one with the girl#is his go to fan pic pose (and smile) 😭😭🤣#but also the fact that he’s met a lot of them for the first time (I’m assuming cuz he ain’t following them on ig) and already they all put#a heart behind his name he really is pure sunshine
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there’s being a teenage girl in your 20s then there’s whatever the fuck the babyface by sorry mom experience is
#i absolutely hate the phrase ‘teenage girl in your 20s’ idea it’s infantilising and will only stunt yr mental + emotional development#because if you keep doing that you’ll be 30 something saying shit like ‘i’m a 21 year old in my 30s’ which just sounds worse lol#and so on#and it’s not exactly a new phenomenon either bc women (mainly) will say they’re 21 with x amount of years extra experience#it’s just. idk. the obsession with perpetual yourh looks worse on people who are already young i guess#anyway back to babyface sorry mom. the album of all time; resonates with the ‘teenage girl in your 20s’ idea#(which for me has always been about being directionless and lost in life and feeling younger because you can see all your other 20-something#friends grow up and get jobs and finish their degrees n shit. and that makes you feel younger; almost teenager like)#(whereas i see a lot of people saying ‘teenage girl in my 20s’ as a way of almost bragging about being immature??#like not knowing how to do things or speak on certain subjects#stuff like ‘when he talks to me about the economy but i’m#literally a teenage girl in my 20s’ LIKE DO YOU NOT HEAR YOURSELF??#and of course i’m not shaming people for not knowing shit i mean look at me. i can’t drive i have no job and i dropped out of uni#but the REFUSAL to learn is astounding. like people think they can get away with being deliberately oblivious because they have#the self-proclaimed mentality of a teenage girl. and how do you think Actual Teenage Girls feel about people assigning their demographic as#being oblivious and vapid and lacking awareness#you know. traits that have historically been assigned to teenage girls that I Can Actively Remember trying to not associate with.#and my female peers were also arguing against as teenagers.#i dunno. in the words of tame impala it feels like we only go backwards)#long tags#kaycore#(fuck it. putting this in the sorry mom tag)#sorry mom band#babyface sorry mom
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every day it just feels more like i’m adding nothing but dead weight to my own ball and chain in the form of promising young men (and a woman) whose lives, dreams and futures i’ve risked, as if my life, dreams and future should be ruined several times without consequence.
#taylor.txt#‘shes 21. she has her whole life ahead of her. don’t risk giving her a record.’#okay? i was 19. i’m 20 now. i don’t know if im strong enough to make 21 at this rate.#‘this could ruin her life’#okay? she already ruined mine
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Anyone else mourning their time now—as if it’s already passed—but it hasn’t. I’m here?
#i don’t know#it feels like limbo kinda#when I was 22 it felt—well I still a#am???#i still am 22 but last year it felt so weird? I kept FEELING like I was already 23#and i would get so surprised when I remembered—hey you just turned 22#and now Im gunna be 23#and it feels like yes—that’s right#THATS the age I’m suppose to be—that’s the age I’ve been ALL ALONG even now just a few more days#but—idk why am I sad? I don’t care about that—maybe birthdays just make me sad?#22 felt like limbo—I got a new job—I want a different job—I want to see the beach#eww I’m still 22??? that feels fake#i DONT like that age one bit—never felt right#i felt 21–21 at least felt real—I want 23 to feel real too#and all this is just me being weird in the head#i should have asked for the week off
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the fact that I’ve already fucking missed out (or will have to miss out in the future) on like all of the major pride events in my area is so homophobic I’m actually gonna cry
#warning for rlly whiny vent in the tags lmao:#I WAS SO CONFIDENT THIS YEAR 😭😭 I WAS SO READY TO GO#BUT NOOO EVERYTHING COOL EITHER ALREADY HAPPENED OR IS ONLY HAPPENING ON THE TWO DAYS I CANT GO#OR ITS 21+ UP ☹️☹️☹️#I’m just. so genuinely sad and disappointed about it#like I don’t think I’ll completely miss it this year bc I’m determined to find SOMETHING to go to#but I just miss it every fucking year because of my stupid adhd brain and I fucking hate it#I’ve missed it for like seven years in a row and every year I INTENDED to go but just. didn’t#I really. really fucking hate my brain sometimes.#I just want to kiss gay people 😭😭 I want to kiss them so bad. I want to hug gay people and admire gay people and see queer elders and bearss#I want to actually access my fucking community#but because my dumb ass can never schedule ANYTHING in time. I always miss out#sorry for being so venty im just. ugh. it hurts.#I want this to be MY summer!!! I want to flirt and date and go to pride and do fun things before I have to go to college!!#but I feel like I’m already fumbling all of it#ughhgghhhhhhh
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i can feel the percy jackson hyperfixation coming back (again)
send help i’m going to become so much worse
#pjo#percy jackson#percy jackson and the olympians#percy jackson my beloved#i can feel the hyperfixation coming#its coming back with a vengeance#i’m already listening to the tlt musical on repeat#i’m considering another reread#(i did a reread this spring)#i am SO CLOSE to opening up ao3 for this#hyperfixation#what if i go feral over a middle grade series#11 year old em would lose their shit#21 year old em is also losing their shit#look i didnt want to be a half blood
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tell me your failed/embarrassing flirting stories to make me feel better, i’ll go first: today i said “get out of my way” forgot to say “i’m kidding” then immediately said “bye”
#it is awful having feelings for someone you know and have an established friendship with#but crushing on someone i barely know is knew to me and i legit feel like an idiot every time i do something stupid like this#i can’t just. talk to the guy#if i say hey and he says sup i say ‘sup indeed’ like what the fuck is that#i can barely even say hello to him#don’t get me wrong i’ve DONE it but most days i’m like#ah fuck there he is#okay you can do it just say hi#just say what’s up#and then he’s already gone#also. like. the setting we’re in is soooo not good for talking or flirting realt because um. it’s work he’s my coworker.. so um. do i fuckin#ask him for his number?? or to hang out??? but like. he’s kind of a stranger to me what do i want to hang out for 🧍#but like. i dont want to do that until i have at least one successful interaction#or like. an actual conversation.#which is gonna be really hard to manage because he doesn’t talk much at all to anyone and i really only talk if someone talks to me first or#i’ll say something absolutely idiotic and ridiculous (and honestly i do that no matter what)#anyway so um. i guess i’m just gonna keep making a fool of myself until i get it right and hopefully i don’t screw it up 🥴#i lost all my confidence in the last year and i cant do anything chill or smooth anymore (i was never that good in the first place but at#least i could PRETEND i knew what i was doing. like i could sell it. the whole weird and lost bit.)#anyway. i felt better for like 5 minutes when some guy at the gas station flirt failed with me on the way home. but that’s partly my fault#too oops. in his defense he probably could not see that i had headphones on bc upon mirror inspection they were well blended with my hair#but i was waiting to cross the street and this guy tried to like nod and smile and i did not know it was to me until i got to the other side#where the gas station was and and like. tried again and i awkward half smiled and saw his face get all mushy and confused like mine FELT 20#mins before when i’d flopped so hard trying to flirt and by the time i’d processed WAIT i think he was FLIRTING WITH ME i was already gone 🤡#but at least it ended better than the poor 14yo who very confidently asked for my number#who. i shit you not. SCREECHED for a solid 44.5 seconds and bolted the other direction when i said sorry im 21#his friends were standing there like wtf too and one was like i am so sorry about him 🤦#cheers to being fools universe
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