#but I prefer to support my public library
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Struck by Gideon the Ninth inverting the inherent tragedy of the Lionheart trope because the Lionheart actually gets to die saving the one they’ve been charged to protect and it is somehow just as tragic as the original trope
#I’ve only read the first book#please don’t spoil anything after that#it’s many weeks before the second book is available at my library#and yes I could probably pirate it#but I prefer to support my public library#Gideon the ninth#Gideon the ninth spoilers#Gideon nav#harrowhark nonagesimus#the locked tomb
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Dragon Age: The Veilguard’s Familiar Faces and Factions
The trailer for Dragon Age: The Veilguard has dropped, and I couldn’t be more excited. It’s like a new breath of life has entered my lungs!
Within the trailer, we now have confirmation of who our seven companions are going to be, and among them are a few familiar faces from the book Dragon Age: Tevinter Nights. We also have some name-droppings of a couple factions featured in the same book and the comics, Dragon Age: The Missing. So, here is what knowledge is established about these faces sand factions.
Neve Gallus & The Shadow Dragons
Neve Gallus was first introduced in the Tevinter Nights story, “The Streets of Minrathous”. She comes off as a no-nonsense and a little intense kind of person. Neve is a Tevinter mage who works as a private investigator. For example, if someone wants some detective work done but doesn’t want the public to know, they would hire Neve. On occasion, she’s even been hired by the templars, who act like just regular cops in Tevinter – and yes, that includes their corruption and primary goal of simply protecting the elite – but Neve prefers to work alone because of that corruption, and has a personal grudge against the order for taking bribes to cover up crimes.
Neve has a prosthetic leg below the knee, made of dwarven-crafted metal.
In The Missing, Neve says she is friends with the Shadow Dragons. In the article shared by EA, as of The Veilguard, she is officially a member. The Shadow Dragons are a group of concerned Tevinter citizens who help those in need. This includes supporting escaped slaves, for example.
Emmrich Volkahrin
Emmrich Volkahrin was first introduced in the Tevinter Nights story, “Down Among the Dead Men”. He is a necromancer from Nevarra, and therefore naturally a member of the Mortalitasi – specifically, a professor in the Mourn Watch. The Watchers serve as elite guardians of the Grand Necropolis. Emmrich is on the eccentric side, personality-wise, but kindly and informal.
Emmrich has a skeleton assistant name of Manfred, who helps him with different office tasks. He also has friends in Myrna, a fellow Watcher, and Audric, a dead guardsmen who looks after the library.
Lucanis Dellamorte
Lucanis Dellamorte was first introduced in the Tevinter Nights story, “The Wigmaker Job”. He is the favourite grandson of Caterina Dellamorte, First Talon (leader) of the Antivan Crows. As such, he was raised from birth to be the perfect assassin in a ruthless and torturous environment, knowing only cruelty from his family. This has led to him feeling less like a person and more like a living weapon – and he is treated like one by everyone who knows of him. He has “the Demon” as a nickname.
I know a few people are curious about the “mage killer” title in the trailer. Rest assured that Lucanis specifically kills evil blood mages. In his own words: “If someone wants to pay me top coin to kill a bunch of racist blood mages—who have it coming—I’m not going to complain.”
Where his cousin Illario has a “silver tongue” as Lucanis puts it, he himself is a lot blunter. His reputation of a killer is spotless, except for one small problem: He has a heart under all that black leather.
Lucanis and Illario get along quite well, except for the fact that Lucanis is destined to be the next First Talon, after Caterina dies. Illario wants the job far more than Lucanis, but Lucanis isn’t sure he’s capable of making a decision for himself that goes against the wishes of the Crows.
The Veil Jumpers
The Veil Jumpers were first introduced in The Missing #3. They are a group made up of primarily Dalish elves, though also inclusive of other folks of any walks of life willing to help, working to try and control the new threats within Arlathan Forest. The forest has become a ground of chaotic magic, with the Veil so thin that time and place is jumbled together. Thus, the Veil Jumpers move in and out of the spots that bleed into one another.
The Veil Jumpers do have a headquarters called “The Sanctum”, but we know nothing else about it.
The Lords of Fortune
Despite the Lords of Fortune being mentioned in more than one Tevinter Nights story, as well as the show Dragon Age: Absolution, we don’t know a lot about them. The only concrete information provided is that they are a loose group of people who collect trinkets and glory. They come out of Rivain. They typically wear a lot of their collected trinkets like badges of honour. That’s really all there is, so I can’t wait to learn more.
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This is a safe place for people who prefer to borrow books from libraries rather than buy them
#my and my library app are best friends#sure I can financially support buying myself a book every once in a while but I much prefer libraries#then I know if I don’t like a book I can just stop reading it or return it without feeling guilty#and also I love supporting public institutions because there are people who genuinely need libraries and supporting libraries supports them#bookblr#library
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UNDER THE COVER | s.jy
MDNI! MDNI! MDNI!
pairing: librarian!Jake x fem!reader
cw/tw: librarian!Jake, badboy!Jake, smut, fluff, mentions of assault and sa, drugs, sex in a public building, pet names, praise, face fucking, masturbation, kissing, mentions of murder (one line)
synopsis: Love was never your goal, preferring to keep your nose in a book while sitting in an isolated corner of your favorite library. But then you met Jake Sim: the quiet librarian who wore sweaters and button downs, the man who treated every book like a treasure, the man that you felt was perfect for you. You knew better than to judge a book by its cover, but who would have known your quiet library crush was the exact opposite of what you'd expected?
featuring: jay and sunghoon (iconic bffs!)
wc: ~6.9k
PART 2
Buy me a Ko-fi!
“Finals are kicking my ass, man,” Sunghoon stretched his arms above his head as he dramatically groaned.
Jay nodded, his notes every shade of the rainbow from his color coded highlighting method of studying. “You can say that again,” he capped the red highlighter and put it behind his ear.
“Finals are kicking my ass, man,” Sunghoon repeated, laughing when Jay threw the yellow highlighter at him.
The two turned to you, your head falling as your eyes began to shut. “Y/N!” Jay shouted. Sunghoon pressed his finger against his mouth and shushed him. “Piss off, Hoon. We're in a soundproofed study room,” Jay sneered.
Your head shot up, hands flying into the table to catch yourself. “The proper function is forty-four,” you mumbled as your eyes opened. “Oh, sorry. I had a dream I had already taken the final,” you rubbed your eye with your wrist.
Sunghoon put his hand over your forehead. “Y/N, if you don't sleep enough, your score’s gonna be a forty-four,” he said, his tone laced with worry.
You smiled, pinching the bridge of your nose. Sunghoon ran his hand over the ponytail you held your hair in, bringing the hair over his head. “Jay, you think I could work long hair?”
“I don't even think you can work basic algebraic equations,” he scoffed. Sunghoon frowned, sitting back upright.
He looked at his notes before groaning in agony. “I'm done for the night, guys. It's, like, seven at night and I'm tired,” he whined.
“Yeah, I think I'm gonna head home, too. You coming, Y/N?” Jay asked as the two stood, packing their notes and pencils.
You shook your head. “No, I'm gonna get a little bit of reading therapy in,” you smiled, thinking of your favorite character.
The two boys looked at each other with a raised brow. Sunghoon wiggled his at Jay, the other returning the action to create some sort of impromptu language. “Are you sure it's therapeutic reading?” Jay asked tenderly.
“Or is it ‘I wanna fuck that hot librarian’?” Sunghoon finished the point, sliding onto the table in front of you.
Your ears turned red, the mental image Sunghoon painted making you sweat. The two burst into laughter, clapping loudly and pointing at you. “She totally does! Y/N has a crush!” Jay shouted.
You slapped your hand over his mouth. “It's soundproof in here, not a solitary confinement cell! They can definitely hear your walrus laughter!”
Jay faked shock, slapping his hand against his chest and holding the table for support.
Ignoring him, Sunghoon leaned his elbows against the table next to you. “So, whatcha likin’ about this dude?”
You squeaked. “I- um-”
Jay returned to his position on the other side of you, his hand on your shoulder. “Is he loud, badass, smokes a lot of weed and parties all night, muscle tees and ripped jeans, maybe a print-”
“Alright, alright!” You shouted. “Remind me to put some soap in your mouth, Jay,” you wagged your finger in his face. He snapped his jaw at you, following your finger. “He's the exact opposite, actually. He's quiet, really kind, he’s not into the party scene, he doesn't wear anything too showy-”
“So he's just like you?” Sunghoon interrupted, pulling the edge of his sweater onto his shoulder.
You nodded, a cheesy grin coming over your lips. “And how do you know all this?” Jay raised his brow. “I doubt you've hung out with him.”
“I can just tell,” you sighed dreamily. You kicked your feet underneath you in excitement.
Sunghoon rolled his eyes. “Ah, yes. Because you read minds.”
Jay clicked his tongue at you, crossing his arms. “Y/N, did nobody ever tell you not to judge a book by its cover?” He asked. “What if you get your hopes up, and then you find out that he's some rager that breaks your heart?”
You shook your head. “I don't think so, he seems pretty genuine from the way he looks.”
Sunghoon rolled his eyes playfully again, “Delusion is one of your few flaws, Y/N. Your other one is reading for fun.”
You sat with your knees against your chest in a small corner of the library. The seating arrangement in that corner was a long, wooden bench that wrapped around the corner of the room. You liked to sit against the corner, your back to the wall and feet facing the shelves in front of you.
In the book you were reading, the main character had gone out with her boss in order to escape her manipulative boyfriend and catch him cheating. Her boss was icy, tall, and young. You'd barely managed to catch it, but it seemed that he was younger than her. The main character was a happy woman who let her naïvety get the best of her, which her boss had helped her get past.
You were in the scene where her boss confesses to her, but you weren't sure where the story was going. He told her he was falling in love with her, which she reciprocated, but he was holding her so close, and the word “heat” and “member” kept appearing in sentences.
You saw a shadow loom over you, shading your book from the light. A large hand rested on top of the book, tilting it back. “Are you enjoying the book so far?” A deep voice with a thick accent asked.
You nodded, not looking up. “It's really good, I'm just a little confused as to what's happening. I don't know who this member is and why they're so hot, but it doesn't make sense for her to be kissing them and not the main guy,” you rambled.
The person let out a deep chuckle. “Cute,” he said under his breath. “This is my favorite part, actually. If you don't know what all of that means, though, maybe you should skip that scene. It's not really important to the plot, anyways,” he continued.
The dim light above you bounced off of his rings, his long finger tapping on the spine of the book lightly in a fidgeting manner.
“I want to know what it means,” you sighed. “Can you explain it to me?”
When the person didn't respond, you looked upwards. Your breath caught in your throat as you squeaked.
The librarian you'd been harboring a secret crush on stood above you, his mouth slightly agape and his cheeks pink. His eyes grew wider with shock the longer you looked into them.
You turned back to the book, your eyes not really reading any words. “I can figure it out myself, sorry,” you whispered.
The man scratched the nape of his neck, a shy laugh leaving his lips. “No, it's okay, that scene is just…”
“Just what? Confusing?”
“Just not something you'd want a stranger to explain.”
“If you love the book, though, wouldn't you be good at explaining it?” You asked, curiosity bubbling up inside you.
He took the book from your hands, folding the corner of the page you were on and closing it. “Let me go check this out for you. I'll tell you at the counter, then you can read the rest at home, ‘kay?”
You nodded, willing to do anything he suggested. He walked you to his counter, scanning the book. “That scene you were reading is probably one of the most well-written sex scenes a reader could ask for,” he casually commented, smirking when you covered your mouth. “You can Google the words you don't know, but tell me if you still enjoyed the book when you return it!”
He placed the book in your bag, waving to you and leaning against the counter.
You sound around, mouth open to speak. “Name’s Jake, by the way,” he smiled handsomely at you, nodding his head up once. “I was gonna introduce myself to you properly, but you kinda jumped the gun on that one, miss sex book girl.”
You blushed, looking away in embarrassment. “You don't have to call me that,” you barely whispered.
“Yeah?” He poked his tongue at his lip with a teasing smile. “What can I call you, then?”
“Y/N,” you looked at the floor before spinning around and walking to the door.
Jake waved behind you, a smile still prevalent on his face. “Have a safe night, Y/N,” he called out behind you. “Hope you enjoy your book!”
Oh, you enjoyed that book alright. With Jake’s words looming in your head, and a trusty Google search (turned out, member did not mean another character), you finished the book with a foggy mind and a whole lot of nervous swallows.
Jay and Sunghoon sat across from you at your local cafe, your bag on the table and notes strewn about. “Hoon, I think you should change majors,” Jay sighed, his palm against his forehead.
Sunghoon chewed his straw nervously while the other reviewed his notes and practice exam. “Why? I thought I was good with my pre-med stuff,” he grabbed the paper from Jay’s hands.
“‘What do you call a row of stitches holding together the edges of an incision?’ was the question, Hoon.”
He looked it over. “I don't see what I did wrong.”
You peeked your head up from your notes, reading the question. “You wrote ‘satire,’” Jay deadpanned. Sunghoon cursed under his breath and erased the answer, writing suture in its place.
“Could've sworn I put suture for that,” Sunghoon mumbled. You pat his back reassuringly, a small frown on his face. “I think I'm just burning out, I've been studying all of this for so long. Jay, gimme your card, I'm gonna go buy us a round of espresso.”
Jay swatted Sunghoon’s reaching arm away. “Dude, no! Use your card, I'm not rich,” he scoffed.
“Oh my gosh, Jay, please,” you whined. “I'm so tired, I barely slept last night.”
Jay’s brow flew to the top of his forehead, the corner of his lip lifting. “Is it because of a certain librarian you stayed late to see?” He lightly punched your shoulder jokingly.
You held your shoulder and cried out in pain dramatically. “C’mon, Jay, you owe her now,” Sunghoon waved his fingers at Jay to make a grabbing motion. Jay sighed, rolling his eyes and giving the card to him. “First round’s on Jay!”
Sunghoon skittered off to the counter to order the drinks, leaving Jay to interrogate you further.
He scooted his chair closer to yours, his arms folded over his chest. “So,” he started, “what's the reason you were up all night?”
You squeaked nervously. He laughed, placing his hand over yours softly. “I was reading a book Jake said was good,” you almost whispered.
Jay shot backwards into his seat, letting out a loud gasp of shock and earning concerned stares from the rest of the customers. You shushed him, to no avail. He spun in his chair, calling out to his friend. “Hoon! Hoon!”
Sunghoon turned to face him with a scowl. “What?” He mouthed.
“She got the hot librarian’s name!” He shouted, not caring whose morning he disturbed.
Sunghoon ran out of line, sliding back into the chair across from you and resting his hand against his chin. “Soooo,” Sunghoon dragged out, “what's his naaaame?”
You shrunk into your seat. “It’s, um-”
“It's Jake!” Jay shouted, leaning over the table.
Sunghoon and Jay brought their hands together, ooh-ing in a high pitched tone as they wiggle their fingers. “Anything else happen? Did he hold the door open for you?” Sunghoon swooned at you.
You shyly laughed. “No, he just told me to read this book,” you blushed, pulling it out of your bag. “He told me what some of it meant, and it really helped!”
Jay flipped the book open to the folded corner, reading a paragraph quickly. He closed the book, furrowed his brows, reopened the book, re-read the paragraph, and turned to you, pointing at the pages as he let his mouth hang open. “He told you what this meant?”
You nodded, blushing. “I was a little embarrassed, but he was super nice about it,” you crossed your ankles and swayed slowly.
Jay shut the book and slid it into your bag, Sunghoon reaching in and pulling it out as he turned.
“Y/N, my dearest, sweetest, bestest friend,” he placed his hand on your shoulder with a smile. Suddenly, his grip turned hard, squeezing into your collarbone. “HE IS FLIRTING WITH YOU!” He seethed.
You swatted his hand away. “Then what do– ow, that actually hurts still– I do?”
Jay peacefully made a tent with his hands against the table. He blew his bangs out of his face, the brunette pieces flying upwards. “You go back there, and you ask him out,” Jay smirked evilly. “And then, you come back and relay everything to us.”
You nodded, saluting and grunting in comprehension.
Sunghoon gasped loudly, causing you and Jay to whip your heads to him.
He slammed the book against the table, scattering Jay’s highlighters and your pencils. “THIS IS A SEX BOOK?!” He shouted.
You blushed while Jay put his hand to his mouth in order to stifle his laughter. Sunghoon slowly turned to you, disgust apparent on his face. “You're such a nerd you read porn?”
“Hey, man. She reads it for the plot,” Jay snickered.
After your embarrassing exchange with your friends, you went back to the library to return the book (and stare at Jake). You held the book in front of you, sad to part with it. Jake had opened a door to a new world that you'd never heard of: the world of erotic romance books.
You blushed at the thought of the genre being his favorite. Swinging the door open, you took in the scent of paper, dust, and the slight hint of lavender you always caught when you walked in. Your eyes adjusted to the dim lighting.
Jake scanned a book at the counter for a woman, his long, black hair being accessorized by his usual pair of round, metal-rimmed glasses.
You watched silently from in front of the door as he performed such a melancholy task in such a charming way. The sleeves of his blue pullover came to the edges of his palm, his white turtleneck beneath covering his skin. You watched his pouty lips curve into your favorite smile, a slight wink being thrown to the older woman.
The woman slipped the book into her bag, giggling and walking towards the door. Jake’s eyes met your own, a happy wave being sent your way.
You felt yourself begin to melt at the sight.
You waved back, walking towards where he was standing. You placed the book into the counter as he smiled at you. He laughed lightly. “Guess it wasn't your cup of tea, seeing as you're bringing it back the next morning?”
You shook your head, “The opposite, actually. I finished it all last night, I just couldn't put it down!” You smiled.
Jake raised a brow, putting his elbow onto the countertop and resting his chin in his palm. “Yeah?” He asked with a thick accent. “What made it so enjoyable?”
This is the flirting Jay was talking about, you thought to yourself.
You bit the tip of your tongue, looking around the room in thought. What could you say to add to the flirting? You hadn't been in a serious relationship in years, you had little to no current experience.
“I guess I really liked the main character's chemistry with her boss,” you smiled at him, “and how he had a different side to his character that he only showed her.”
Jake nodded, leaning back and rocking onto the heels of his feet. He slid the book across the counter with a low whistle escaping his lips. “You're the first person I've met that tried to find something romantic in this book.”
You mentally facepalmed yourself. “Is that not what I was supposed to do? The writing was really good, I just-”
“Hey, hey,” he laughed. “Don't worry your pretty self over that, I think it's cool that you didn't just admire the smut aspect of the book,” he scanned the barcode on the back cover and placed the book onto a cart.
“I did enjoy that part a little, it just felt awkward to read,” you lied. You actually re-read that section of the book three times after finishing the book.
Jake’s tongue swiped across his bottom lip to wet it with a smile. He walked around the counter, pushing his book cart in the direction of the young adult section of the library.
You turned to walk to your usual corner of the library, ready to surrender this golden opportunity to your awkwardness. You took a step forward, spinning back around quickly as Jake coughed.
You made eye contact as his mouth opened to speak. “Can I have your number?” You blurted out.
Jake’s mouth shut with squinted eyes. Rejection.
“Can you read my mind or something?” He asked.
You shot him a confused look, a toothy grin splayed across his face. “I was-” He cleared his throat nervously, “I was just thinking about how I wanted to ask you to hang out after I close up, sorry if it came out weird.”
You felt clouds lift your feet, making them take even steps before landing in front of him with your phone out. He chuckled as he put his number into your phone. “Doesn't this place close late, though?” You asked.
He nodded. “It closes at nine, but if I'm being honest, fun never really happens until after dark.”
You laughed, thinking he was joking. He was not.
He shrugged, continuing to push the cart. “Just text me your address, I'll pick you up. I'll make sure it's a date that you'll never forget,” he smiled.
Your heart soared. It raced. It pounded. More importantly, it stopped. Time stopped. “Date?” You squeaked out.
He laughed, his ears turning red. “Yeah, I figured it should be a date. Don't wanna waste a good time with a pretty girl like you, y'know?” He scratched the back of his neck.
You nodded eagerly. “It's a date! What do I wear?”
“Just some comfortable clothes, you don't have to do much to impress me. I'll be wearing what I usually do, anyways,” he placed a book onto the shelf, examining the next book.
You walked to the cart, grabbing a book from the other side. “I know it's not very romantic, but can I help you put away the books? It might help you close faster,” you smiled.
He pulled the cuffs of his pull-over off of his hands. “I find it very romantic that you want to do the most boring part of my job with me, actually,” he joked.
That same lavender scent you would get hints of came flooding your senses as the two of you worked closely. You closed your eyes, taking a long breath. Jake smelled like lavender, and god, it made your knees weak.
Jay and Sunghoon, although strongly against the date, showed up to your place at seven sharp to help you get ready for it. “I mean, what kind of guy asks a kind and unsuspecting girl to go out after nine?” Sunghoon asked as he curled your hair.
He looked up into the mirror, eyes locking on yours. “A sex offender,” He released your hair from the contraption, waving the wand in the air as he spoke.
Jay groaned as he laid different outfit combinations across your bed. “For the tenth time, Sunghoon, he wouldn't be able to work at a public library if he was a registered sex offender!” Jay tapped his toes in thought before throwing a red shirt of yours onto the growing pile of clothes on your floor.
“Maybe he's not a sex offender yet,” Sunghoon replied, “but our little Y/N could end up being the body they find in the ditch.”
You sighed as Jay struggled to not throw a hard object at his friend. Sunghoon and Jay had been going at it since they arrived, Sunghoon erring more on the “worried mother” end of the argument.
“Sunghoon, stop worrying so much. He's super cute and sweet, he probably just wants to watch a movie or something,” you smiled.
Sunghoon clicked his tongue. “Let's recall what he said. ‘Wear something comfortable’, because tight clothes cause you to bleed out slower. ‘A date you'll never forget’, because you'll be dead by eleven.”
“‘I just want to have sex with you and then send you home at four in the morning,’” Jay commented. “You make it sound like she's going out with Michael Myers. Don't forget, Hoon, she already agreed to share her location with us in the groupchat.”
Sunghoon rolled his eyes, running his fingers through your curls. “So we'll know what corner of the road her body ends up on, but what about her head?”
“Oh, God, you're going off the deep end,” you pressed your hand to your forehead.
You stood from the chair, doing a small twirl for the two. You had already done your makeup before the two arrived, but you were a lost cause with fashion and hair.
Jay clapped, his lower lip jutting out in an impressed expression. “Wow, Hoon. Maybe you should drop out of college and become a hairdresser,” he commented, earning a threatening jab with the hot iron from Sunghoon.
You unplugged the appliance, taking it from his hands and carefully placing it down. Jay held a shirt and skirt to your body, nodding for the other man to look at the combination.
Sunghoon patted the man on his back, a smile on his face. “See, if I had to send my only daughter off to possibly go missing, this is the outfit I think she'd want to go in.”
You walked out of your door at exactly a quarter past nine, Jake’s text message reminding you of a drunk message from Jay.
Hey um he uh, um out sigh in the blocker period sore we eve this cumster you we're, um using speech to text period
You figured it translated roughly to, “Hey, I'm here, I'm outside in the black car. Sorry if this comes to you weird, I'm using text to speech.” You just couldn't figure out where cumster could've come from.
You giggled as you sat in the car. Your purse clinked loudly with the pepper spray, pocket knife, seatbelt cutter, lockpick, whistle, and body reflectors Sunghoon wouldn't let you leave without.
You closed the door, turning to Jake. You audibly screamed when you saw the man in the front seat. He jumped, looking into the backseat and out of every window. “Shit, Y/N, what's wrong?!” He shouted, equally as scared as you.
You looked at him in disbelief. “Jake? Is that really you?”
The man who was sitting next to you was wearing a black wife-beater and baggy jeans with large tears at the knees, a small book pendant hanging off a gold chain. His body, now uncovered by layers of clothing, was covered by layers of ink. He had a paw print on his inner arm, the name Layla written inside of it, along with many music tattoos and smaller symbols across his arms and chest.
You looked down, noting that it seemed even his legs had art on them. His eyes followed yours, a small gasp leaving his mouth. “Oh, yeah. Guess I forgot to mention all that,” he smiled. “They're everywhere, but they all mean something.”
You looked up at him, your eyes wide. You may have painted him as a modest man, but you'd be lying if you said the Jake in front of you didn't make you feel butterflies. “They're pretty,” you commented, reading the tattoo on the side of his neck.
“Love is a great beautifier.”
Jake self-consciously ran his hand over it. “It's from Little Women,” Jake smiled softly.
“I love that book,” you commented, continuing to admire his look. His hair had fallen messily over his forehead, his glasses seeming to have disappeared.
He sucked a breath in through his teeth. “Me too, actually. It's what got me into reading,” he looked forward as he put his seatbelt back on. “Look, if you find that I look too weird like this, I can put a jacket on or something-”
“No! I like it, actually. You look… good,” you blushed as you put your seatbelt on.
Jake reached his hand under your chin, lifting your head to look at him. “Look me in my eyes and say it again,” the corner of his lip lifted. “I want to see you say it, don't hide your face from me.”
You mumbled, “You look good.”
“I'll take it,” he smiled fully, throwing the car into drive and pulling into the road. “Just know, I don't let pretty girls hold their tongue around me.”
You looked out the window in an effort to hide your nervousness. Jake turned his radio on, playing a band you didn't know.
He started humming along to the song as it got closer to the chorus. He had a beautiful voice, which only added to your nervousness.
“Where are we going?” You asked, noticing a familiarity in the direction he was driving in.
He tested his elbow against his center console as he drove with one hand. “I figured I could take you to the library after hours, y'know? We'd be alone but it wouldn't be like you didn't know the place. I can show you my favorite spot, too.”
You shot a glance in his direction. “Jake, isn't it closed?”
“Yeah, and?”
“As in, we can't be there?”
“Yes we can,” he smiled.
You rolled your eyes. “If you're trying to break into a building, I think we should call this off.”
“Relax, sweetheart,” he laughed, his accent shining through, “it's not breaking in.”
“Entering with a key doesn't count.”
“It does when you own the place,” Jake pulled up to a stop light, wiggling his eyebrows at you before laughing loudly. Your jaw was to the floor, an unreadable expression in your eyes. “I've never made it obvious that I owned it, because it was given to me by my grandmother when she retired, but I've owned it since I moved here. My cousin opens the place on weekdays while I go to college, but I close every night and spend the whole weekend there.”
“You'd have to live there to pull that off,” you rolled your eyes.
“I do,” he responded. “My place is right next to it.”
You scoffed, rolling your eyes. “Of course you're handsome, funny, good at singing, and you own a business.”
You felt his hand land on your leg, his fingers tapping rhythmically to the music. You turned to him, your eyes trailing up his arm. “You can continue,” he said with a shit-eating grin.
You lightly hit his arm, pointing to the road. “Light's green,” you turned to hide your blush.
Jake walked you into the familiar building, a small smile on his face as he pulled a projector from the office room. “Come and sit down, pretty girl,” he plugged a handful of cords into the device and turned it on.
You walked past the nonfiction shelves to see pillows forming small seats on the floor, a basket of movie snacks and drinks in the middle. Jake had thrown some last minute fairy lights into the mix, wrapping them around the seating area and putting some candles on the ground. “Jake, this looks amazing.”
He sat on a pillow before laughing and motioning to the other. You ran over, sitting down and immediately putting on a movie.
You didn't watch a single moment of the movie. Although Jake seemed immersed, you couldn't take your eyes off of him. Your eyes took in the slight shine against his skin from the movie, the light in his eyes looking like stars. You didn't miss the way he chewed his tongue when he got focused, or when his hair was blown awry by the air conditioner.
Your brain took a turn for the worse as a more romantic scene in the movie arrived. Your eyes raked over his exposed skin, feeling like a Victorian man who had just been introduced to short sleeves.
You looked at his tattoos, really looked at them, and saw countless music notes with small letters in them, a guitar, small pictures or animals, and a lot of book references. You never expected Jake to have been fully inked up, but you also never expected to find that as a huge turn-on.
You squeezed your thighs together to hide the fact that a simple doodle in perfectly smooth skin had put you in such a predicament. Jake turned to you, wrapping his arm around you and pointing to the screen. “See that actor?”
“Yeah, what about him?” You asked.
Jake let his hand fall onto your lap, turning to you. “Even he can tell you're not paying attention,” he pushed your hair behind your ear. “Wanna tell me what you like so much that you've been staring at me the whole time?”
You gawked. You geeked. You'd fumbled.
Jake slid his hand onto your back, and in a moment he was above you. “Tell me, sweetheart, what's so attractive that it's got you squeezing those pretty thighs so tight?”
You gulped, your thoughts having gone anywhere but where they should. He tapped his finger against your lip, a sinful smile on his face. “Your tattoos,” you whispered.
Jake leaned back, messily pushing his hair out of his face and laughing darkly. “You like my tattoos so much that you're getting wet over them?” He asked, looking down at you.
You nodded. “I like how cool you look, wanna see the rest.”
“You want to see the rest of the ones on me, sweetheart?” He asked in that thick Aussie accent you couldn't get enough of.
With a small squeak, you nodded again, feeling smaller than usual in his gaze. He looked at you the same way you'd assume a predator stared at its prey in its final moments, but you felt a strange sense of safety with him.
He slowly leaned in, his arms caging you in as he pressed his lips to yours. He held your hip with his large hand, his fingers gripping your ass while his palm held you down. He slid his thigh over your core, pressing into where you needed him most.
Your lips parted, letting out a moan. Jake swallowed it whole, sliding his tongue against your own slowly and sucking on your bottom lip. The two of you built a slow rhythm, his thigh grinding into you as you arched your back like clockwork.
His hand never left your hip, holding you in place to keep you victim to his torturously slow lips and thrusts. He loved every noise that left your mouth. Jake pulled away from you, his eyes taking in your wet, puffy lips. The two of you were breathlessly panting to catch your breaths.
His lips parted in thought. “Didn't think you'd be such a good kisser,” he mused. “Almost like you were made for my lips.”
You giggled, pushing him off you as he went to press more kisses to your lips. “Jake, I want to know more about you,” you whined.
“For one, I'm a really good kisser,” he wiggled his eyebrows jokingly as he settled back into his seat. His arms came behind him for support. He seemed to not worry about covering his obvious boner, leaning back and looking at the ceiling.
You hit his arm. “I know that already,” you fussed. “But, like, what are some hobbies of yours?”
He jut his bottom lip out in thought. “I play guitar,” he shrugged, “and there's nothing I love more than getting high and reading a good book.”
You blinked slowly, his eyes coming to yours with a smile. “What does being high even have to do with reading?”
“Makes the experience more realistic. Feels like you're there, you start feeling what the character feels and all,” he sighed. “I like to read romance books, though.”
You bit the back of your lip. “Does that really work?”
“Wanna try it?"
Jake had lit a joint for you, showing you how to hold it and even going so far as to hold it for you while he played with your hair.
The world started to move slower, certain colors waving in your vision. “Do you feel it?” Jake asked, running his hands through your hair. You nodded, looking around the room. “The rest’ll hit soon, just know I'm right here if you need me.”
He put his arm around your shoulders as he took his own hits, resting his head against your own.
He put the joint into a small ashtray, standing with you and grabbing one of the many books he'd brought into the soundproofed study room off a table.
The two of you read through it, laughing when one of you wouldn't be done with the page as fast as the other. Suddenly, the book began to describe a racier scene, one with hands all over the main character's body and kisses being pressed over her.
Jake watched you closely, taking note of how you squirmed in your seat every time the girl felt a new sensation. “What's wrong, Y/N?” Jake asked in a low voice, leaning into you. “You seem… worked up.”
You swallowed hard. “N-No! I’m just cold,” you lied. Jake clicked his tongue, closing the book and holding you by your thigh.
He used his hand to pull you closer, his lips connecting to your own. “Sure, sweetheart. I believe you,” he lied with a smirk. He glanced at your lips again before wrapping his fingers around your throat, pulling you in to continue his rough kiss.
A groan slipped from Jake's own throat, his body reacting before he could. He pulled away, his hand sliding up your closed thighs. “Not,” he continued, connecting your lips again. You opened your legs slightly, giving Jake the ability to use his hand and pry them open.
He ran his fingers up and down your clothed slit, just barely giving you the friction you craved. You felt how hard he was through his jeans, his crotch subtly grinding against your leg. He continued his assault against your lips, never once stopping for air.
You hit his chest, moaning into his mouth as he pulled away. “Jake, stop teasing me.”
“Oh, I'd never tease you, darling,” he responded with a mischievous grin. “Just wanted you to feel how good you're gonna feel with me.”
Jake took his hand off your skirt and brought it into your other hand. He brought his lips to your neck, biting down and tracing the marks with his tongue. You moaned out his name, making him groan lowly into your neck.
“I can't wait anymore,” he said as he stepped back and began unbuckling his belt. “I need to feel your throat around me.”
You stood, walking to be in front of him and pushing his back to the table. His breath caught in his throat as you sank to your knees in front of him. He hurriedly finished unbuckling his belt, reaching his hands to his waistband to pull down the rest of his clothing as you held his hand to stop him.
“Wait, Jake, are you sure about this? We're both high and in a study room in the library, what if the cameras pick up the noise?”
Jake leaned against the table behind him, his hands holding onto the edge of it at his sides. He looked at you with such an intense heat behind his gaze, you could feel the lust of it gathering into your underwear.
He slid a hand into your hair, pulling you to him and smashing his lips to yours. He brought his thigh outwards to catch your body between your legs. Your eyes shut at the feeling, the messy kiss fogging your brain.
“These rooms are sound-proof for two reasons. One, for studying or reading. And two, so I can fuck your throat as hard as I want.”
He released your hair, making you fall back to your knees. He pushed his pants and boxers down to his knees, giving you a grand view of his cock.
It was veiny, thick, and the tip was such an angry red that the precum leaking from it almost screamed for you to lick it all up. Without warning, you grabbed it and took it between your lips.
Jake threw his head back, a moan bouncing off the walls of the room. You heard him suck a breath in through his teeth as you sucked on the tip. You let your tongue glide over his slit, collecting his precum and swallowing it.
“Fuck, Y/N, you're so good at this,” he moaned. Your wetness was dripping down your legs, you felt it. You moaned around him as you took more of him in with hollowed cheeks.
He held the sides of your head, forcing you to look into his eyes. “Remember what I said, sweetheart. Wanna fuck your face, if that's okay.”
You hummed on his dick, giving him the go-ahead. He slowly began to thrust into your mouth, not pushing in all the way. When you began to bob your head further, Jake took it as his sign to go deeper.
He added more force and speed to his thrusts until you were taking him whole, each thrust hitting the bottom of your throat and making you gag around him. Your saliva was dripping down his balls and onto his legs as you used one hand to rub your own clit.
You were so close, but you wanted to wait until his cum was pouring down your throat to finish. “Such a good girl for me, so sweet for taking my dick down her throat,” Jake hummed, his eyes never leaving the sight. It all felt so good.
Jake’s legs began to shake as he let out more moans. Jake was not afraid to be loud, nor was he afraid to speak his mind. He constantly praised you between his little moans.
“Fuck,” he moaned. “‘M so close.”
You moaned against him again, his hips jolting forward. “Gonna make me cum down your throat like that, bet you want that don't you?”
His tip slammed into the back of your throat, his thrusts growing erratic. With each thrust he gave to the back of your throat, you circled your clit faster. “Fuck, ‘m gonna cum,” he groaned.
His hips stuttered to a halt, warm liquid spilling into your stomach. “Taking it so, so good,” he sighed, his hair sticking to the sweat on his forehead. “Atta girl, my girl, so beautiful with my cock down her throat.”
You moaned as you felt your orgasm take over you, moans spilling around Jake’s cock and slightly overstimulating him. He thrusted one more time into you, a lazy smile on his face. He pulled out of you, watching bits of spit and cum dribble down your chin.
You looked like an absolute wreck, your hair messy and your mascara running with spit down your chin. Jake loved it. You looked stunning to him.
“Y/N, that was amazing. Thank you,” he pulled you up to sit you in a chair. He ran out of the room to get water for you, as he'd told you when he walked out.
Your eyes darted around the room. You opened your phone to see four missed calls from both Sunghoon and Jay.
You dialed Jay’s phone number, a groggy smile on your face. “Hey, what's up?”
“Y/N, are you still with Jake?”
“Yes, why?” You asked, stretching in the chair.
He sighed over the phone. “We've been waiting outside the library for half an hour, get the fuck in the car.”
“Jay, I'm capable of bringing myself home-”
“Y/N. Get out of there, now,” Jay said, his tone cold. “I don't know how to say this, but-”
“Jay, you can't control me. I'm an adult,” you rolled your eyes, pacing around the room. “If you're so uncomfortable with me dating someone-”
Jay interrupted you, saying a sentence you'd never think to hear about anyone, much less the guy you sucked off less than three minutes ago. His words had you quickly grabbing your belongings and running out of the building, hoping Jake didn't see you go.
“He’s wanted for murder, Y/N.”
notes: MURDER?? oh boy.. didn't see that one coming ;) expect the next part to be... Eventful. Originally, Jake was supposed to be a camboy, but I figured that possible criminal Jake would be better LMFAO. I reccomend listening to Arctic monkeys or chase Atlantic when you read this series.
tags: @heesitation @vizstars
likes, comments, and reblogs are always appreciated, and thank you for reading! stick around for part 2!!
#enhypen fanfiction#enhypen fluff#enha smau#enhypen jake#enhypen jay#enhypen smau#enhypen smut#enhypen sunghoon#enhypen heeseung#enha heeseung#jake smut#jake x reader#jake#enha jake#jake sim#jake sim smut#sim jake#sim jaeyun#enhypen jaeyun#enhypen#enha smut#kpop smut#smut
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The thing I find most concerning about the sudden and rapid declines of platforms like Twitter, Reddit, and to a lesser extent Discord and Facebook, is the loss of digital third places that will result from it.
[Definition: a Third Place is a space outside of work or the home that you spend a significant amount of time in. Usually a social gathering place like a church, library, park, or gym]
It's a known issue that physical third places are disappearing. Cities, malls, and shopping centers have cracked down hard on loitering, resulting in a lack of public space for people to just hang out in. Parks exist, but their use is usually dependent on weather conditions. Church attendance has been in decline for decades for a lot of reasons I won't get into here. Libraries exist but they're not a good place to talk with friends. And pretty much every other third place I can think of (bars, game stores, bookstores, coffee shops, etc) requires you to spend money if you want to be there. None of these are new observations, smarter people than myself have written whole books on the loss of in-person third places.
Social media has been filling in the gap left by these third places for the last couple of decades. As physical space has become less accessible we've migrated online to find community - and especially during COVID, social media was really the only place you could socialize with others. None of this is new information either.
But the current issue, that I've seen very few people talking about, is that companies are starting to price and bully people out of those digital third places the same way they did with physical third places. The difference is that it's happening much faster, and usually at the whim of just one or two people. These are not broader sociological trends slowly shutting down social spaces like what we saw with the decline of shopping malls. There will be no slow adjustment to another social medium. We are seeing individual billionaires making a choice in real time to monetize people out of some of the only public social spaces we have left.
I've seen people bemoaning the loss of information that comes with these sites collapsing, but personally, I am far more concerned with the loss of social space. Don't get me wrong, social media of all kinds is an absolute nightmare, but for many people (and especially for teenagers who have more restrictions on where they can go and what money they can spend) online space is one of the only places they can reliably go to socialize.
In a country like the U.S. where the federal government is calling loneliness an epidemic this is actually a much bigger concern than I think a lot of people realize. How many people have more online friends than in-person ones? What happens to rates of loneliness as social media platforms become inaccessible and people lose those connections?
Obviously, the preferred answer is that people will go make more friends in person, but remember that in-person social spaces have already been severely limited. This is not the easy option that you might hope it is.
My actual call to action on this is to fucking fight to get your in-person third places back. Talk to your local representatives about repealing loitering laws - organize protests or ballot initiatives about it if you have to. Work with rotary clubs and parks departments to fund new public restrooms and park shelters. If there are places in your community that provide free workshop spaces/ game nights/ art walks/ etc go to them and support them financially when and if you're able. Go to your local library and check out a book so they get more funding! I know this shit can be boring, but things are only going to get worse if people don't have places where they can connect with each other. We can't keep letting capitalists take community spaces from us.
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My younger sibling came out to me as a trans guy. The problem is that our family isn’t supportive at all, so he only has me at this point. Everything I’ve always wanted for him is to be happy, so I’m determined to support him no matter what. Maybe you could give me an advice on how I can do it? Is there something I should know specifically? Sorry, I just don’t want to mess everything up and make him feel uncomfortable. Thank you in advance for the answer.
I think the best thing you can do when you're in a household that's not supportive is be a safe person to talk to, and someone who's presence can remind him he's not alone.
I don't know how your sibling is, so I don't know if he'd be embarrassed to talk to you or not, but just remind him he can talk to you about the things he's feeling. Maybe offer to go shopping with him if he wants to buy more masculine clothing (I dont know your gender, but everything is easier if you have someone you trust by your side). Or go to the library with him if he wants to look for books by trans authors and the like. If you live somewhere that has trans or queer events you can offer to go with him. If not, you can just try encouraging him to hang out with you other places than home. Somewhere where it would be safer to talk freely or for him to test out identity related things like being called different names or pronouns. Basically if he wants to try things, remind him he doesn't have to try alone.
If you're worried about making him uncomfortable, just remember to be letting him take the lead on things. Sometimes people want to go slow with their family, sometimes they want to go fast. Try not to push him if he's not entirely ready to talk about certain things or have you think of him a certain way yet (like if he's not ready to try a new name or for you to call him brother. Again, you'd know better than I would what he's already told you of course). Encouragement is always okay! Just remember to toe the line between encouraging and pushing.
One thing I don't know: is your household not supportive in that he's told them all and they reject him? Or does he know they'll reject him so he's only told you? If there's any secrets involved, do your best to keep them and don't accidentally out him. If there are situations where he'd prefer being mis-gendered by you, listen to what he would like you to do. (This goes for at home but also in public or when talking about him to other people).
At the end of the day just by virtue of him knowing that you support him, you are doing a world of good for him already. I think you're going to do fine.
If anyone else has any advice they can comment or reblog.
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30 Things I Learned As An Adult
In honor of me turning 30 in January, I’ve decided to write out a list of 30 things I learned as an adult. Now, some of these worked for me through trial and error, while others did not.
1. Self Care Is Important
I cannot stress this enough. We all need to practice self care, to take time for ourselves. It takes baby steps to find a good self-care routine, and there’s plenty of online resources to find one to your tastes. Remember it is all about trial and error, and don’t worry about perfecting it right away. Research some different self care routines online as a starting point.
2. Read Books, Not Fanfiction
Okay, don’t get me wrong, I do love reading some good ole fanfiction, and current events. However, definitely pick up a book once in a while. Whether it’s a graphic novel, comics, manga, please develop a reading habit. It definitely helped me out a lot as a former college dropout, there are reading lists on sites like Goodreads, here on Tumblr, even colleges have lists what books students are required to read. And it does help with expanding your knowledge and vocabulary. As I’ve previously said, I’m a former college dropout who’s currently back in school, however, developing a healthy reading habit is what kept me grounded. If you need a starting point, I recommend reading a fiction book, preferably in the SciFi/Fantasy genre; or reread a book from your childhood. Also, PLEASE GET A LIBRARY CARD! You’ll definitely be saving a lot of money, and we need to support our public libraries now more than ever.
3. Say “No” More Often
If you don’t feel comfortable going out, or if your manager calls and asks to cover a shift, just say “no.” Remember, you have the power to set boundaries, especially with family, friends, and work. This correlates to number 1 on my list, self care is super important, and you cannot put your health at risk for anyone. I’m going to repeat that last part: SELF CARE IS SUPER IMPORTANT, AND YOU CANNOT PUT YOUR HEALTH AT RISK FOR ANYONE!
4. Register To Vote, And Vote In Every Election
With politics being so polarized and divisive in the past decade, and the upcoming 2024 US Presidential Election, please register to vote. And voter suppression has been very rampant in the past two, arguably three, decades. To anyone about to turn 18 here in the US, please register to vote ASAP! And vote in every goddamn election, both national and local. I seriously cannot stress this enough.
5. Eat Healthy, No Seriously
I love some fast food once in a while now, however, please take some time to learn about healthy eating. It will catch up with you in the future, and our US healthcare system is already fucked as all hell. I know the rising costs of everything, including food, is insane right now; but please keep informed about how to prepare good healthy food.
6. Take Breaks From Current Events, Social Media, and the Internet
This also correlates with number one. While it is very important to stay informed with what is happening in the world/country of origin; especially with the US Presidential Election year. Remember, it’s okay to take breaks from reading too much news, and scrolling through social media feeds. It really does have an effect on your mental health, and unfortunately too many people tend to fall down the conspiracy theory rabbit hole on all sides of the political spectrum. To the teenagers and young adults, take breaks and focus on your mental health and well-being. To the adults, read the previous sentence. With everything so polarizing, take care of yourself first.
7. High School Friends DO NOT LAST!
My friends from high school and early college years were definitely the “ride and die” type of friends, metaphorically speaking. If you have that one friend who was/is the “give the shirt off their back” type, check in on them once in a while. However, with the former, just move on. The friends I had in high school definitely had a lot of childhood trauma, and in one aspect, I’m glad that they were honest about it; it was/is a way to heal. However, any “friend” who just doesn’t want to better themselves and use you for any convenience, DUMP THEM AND CUT OFF ALL CONTACT! Remember just as you set boundaries with your toxic family members, and even for your job, you should do the same with friends.
8. Change Jobs, ASAP!
This is a very important one. I didn’t really have a job as a teenager, I wanted to enjoy being a kid for a little longer, however, I did have an occasional babysitting job. At 23 years old, I got a job at a fast food place. While I do appreciate part of the experience, like how to use the “customer service” voice, however, any red flags that pop up in your head, change jobs, ASAP! It was toxic, too political (for some weird reason) and a lot of drama (and not from the teenagers). The grocery store I work at now does have its busy times, however, it’s much more calmer, and I don’t see too many “Karen” types.
9. Declutter More Often
This is also a definite must as you get older. Whatever you don’t need anymore, donate them. Whatever is completely broken, throw it away! Whatever it is that is in good condition, sell it or maybe give it to someone as a birthday/holiday present. Any old makeup, throw it away! It’ll help reduce the amount of clutter and mess. If you need a starting point, I suggest the KonMari method. It really did help me out a lot.
10. Use A Planner
This is a life-and-time saver. Write down any appointments, cleaning days, paydays, bill charges, etc.; into a physical planner. If you’re in college, please use one! And write down any assignments to work on/turn in BEFORE the deadline. Also, anything important, put into your calendar app on your phone and laptop as a reminder.
11. Have A Skin Care Routine
Okay, I know having a skin care routine isn’t for everyone, and we all have different reactions to skin care products; however, don’t be afraid to experiment with a good skin care routine. In my early teen years, I used Proactiv skin care for my acne, and it helped out a lot. Remember: cleanse, tone, any serum of your choice, and moisturize. This also helps out if you don’t feel like jumping into the shower. Also, use sunscreen, seriously.
12. Don’t Get Married, Until You’re Ready
This is coming from someone who is single, lol. If you plan on getting married to your romantic partner, I’m proud of you! Marriage is about communication, being honest, and doing equal amount of work (finances, household chores, etc.) Save money if you’re planning for a wedding, or go to your local courthouse to get a marriage license if you don’t want the big, fancy reception.
13. Don’t Have Kids, Until You’re Ready
Again, this is coming from someone who is single and childless, lol. Having kids is a lot of work: physically, mentally, emotionally, and financially. Not everyone is capable of being a parent, and I have read PLENTY of posts on here and other websites about toxic parents/parenting styles. Take time and think about if you’re ready to become a parent.
14. Learn How To Budget Your Money
This is for anyone of any age out there. Please learn how to budget your spending. Look for stuff on sale or clearance, or cut back on certain types of spending. I know most people have no idea where to start, but there is! There’s some great websites and YouTube channels on how to budget your money. Another great tool to use are spreadsheets like Microsoft Excel or Google Sheets. I use a Google Sheet template to help track my spending and budget my finances. Also, if you have gift cards from your birthday/holidays/etc; definitely use them, you won't be breaking your bank account :). Also, definitely have some paper cash in your wallet for emergency use.
15. Open A Savings/Emergency Funds Account, ASAP!
This is a huge one to have as an adult, especially during the COVID-19 pandemic. Anything left over from paying the bills, from a side hustle, or from your tax returns, put that into savings. Certain banks will also have the option of creating “financial goals” in savings accounts; so I highly recommend using that as well. This also correlates with number 14. If you’re interested, open two or three savings accounts, the last one should only be for emergency funds.
16. Get A Physical Hobby, AKA Exercise!
It doesn’t matter what type of exercise you do, please do it! And for anyone who is physically disabled, there are modified options provided on YouTube. We do lose certain motor functions as we age, so definitely pick an exercise that’s right for you, as they say. Even if it's just going outside for a walk for 30 minutes, please do some type of exercise.
17. Learn How To Meal Prep
It doesn’t have to be for every meal of every day, pick a meal you want to make and prepare ahead of time. And prepare that meal the day before, so it will be on hand when you leave your house. There are some great videos on YouTube, and some ideas from Pinterest if you need a starting point.
18. If You’re Able To, Go To The Dentist!
Seriously though, try and go for a checkup/teeth cleaning. You’re only given one set of teeth after all your baby teeth fall out, and you need to take good care of them. If you’re able to, or live near to one, local colleges have free cleanings through their dental training programs.
19. If Your Job Offers a 401K, GET ON IT NOW!
My old job at a fast food restaurant didn’t have retirement benefits, but my current grocery store job does. I jumped on it right away, even if it’s not the job I want right now. And it’s a good starting point to have some money saved up for retirement. If you leave the job that has a 401k, you can do what's called a rollover. This will put the money that was set into the first retirement fund into another one; you can do this with your bank or if your new job has a 401k.
20. If You Don’t Have Health Insurance, Sign Up With The State, or Through Your Job.
In my experience, I have insurance through the state at the moment. If your job offers health insurance as well, jump on it right away, even if it’s not the job you want, it’ll be a starting point that correlates with number 19.
21. It’s Okay To Not Go To College
This is coming from someone who was a college dropout at 19, and currently back in school. If you don’t feel ready to go to college, that’s okay too. College is very expensive, especially here in the US, and not everyone can get a scholarship, even if they did apply for a lot of them. Maybe get a part-time job or two (for some income), explore some hobbies you enjoy, and take some time to think about some goals.
22. If You’re In College, It’s Okay To Stay At Home
Again, coming from a former college dropout, I stayed at home while attending a nearby community college in another state. However, out-of-state tuition and housing is also very expensive. If you have a good relationship with your parents, and if you’re going to school in-state, talk to them about staying home while going to school. If you don’t, then talk to a trusted friend or family member about getting an apartment together that isn’t on-site housing while you’re attending school.
23. Watch Non-English Language Movies
If you’re a movie lover like me, take some time to watch some foreign language films once in a while; and I know we anime fans do, lol. To be honest, it does get very boring watching English language films all the time, whether from the States, England, or Canada. Watching foreign language movies will definitely help you to understand the world a lot better, if you don’t have the means for traveling yet; and they will help you to understand that no matter where we live, we all have similar issues, hopes, dreams, etc. If you need a starting point, I recommend any of the Studio Ghibli movies, I would start with Kiki’s Delivery Service; or Guillermo del Toro’s Pan’s Labyrinth.
24. SET BOUNDARIES
Remember: toxic family members and friends are not worth it. You are worthy and valid for love and respect. This correlates to number 7. This is also very useful in the workplace.
25. Express Yourself Through Fashion
Like everyone else, I feel most comfortable in jeans and a t-shirt myself; however sometimes I like to dress up just for fun, or to build up my self esteem and image. This also helps when learning to pair an accessory with an outfit. Play around with different color palettes and clothing styles, and find the one you feel the most “you.” For example, I’ve always looked my best in jewel tones and a cooler color palette. Read some fashion articles or watch some YouTube videos about how to pick out an outfit.
26. It Is Not Selfish To Prioritize Yourself
This correlates with number 3. I have noticed it’s mostly a Western/American/Christian culture norm, we’re always told to take care of others before taking care of ourselves; or we’re selfish for prioritizing ourselves over others. It is not selfish, it is part of self care. Again, this is tied in with number 24.
27. Failing and Making Mistakes Is Part of Growing
There is so much societal pressure on trying to be successful in life and work, especially in the Western/American hemisphere. However, making mistakes and failing at something is part of growing, and learning as an individual.
28. It's Okay to Not Have a Label to Define Yourself
Hear me out. I understand the use of labels in society and culture in general; everyone wants to belong somewhere and feel accepted. However, it is okay to not have a label to define who you are, and who you want/choose to be. Take all the time you need to figure out what's best for you. And sometimes people don't realize a label will fit them until they are much older in life. Or they couldn't at the time.
29. Don't Compare, You'll Get There
We are human, and we all have the tendency to compare ourselves to others. Unfortunately, this doesn't end after high school and college. And that needs to seriously change, especially in the Western/American hemisphere. Simply writing down "don't compare, you'll get there" is a great reminder to have for yourself. Everyone learns and grows at their own pace.
30. It Really Is The Little Things That Keep Us Going
When life seems to get too hard, it really is the little things that keep us going. Whether it is something as simple as someone holding a door open for you, or someone complimenting* you on your outfit or your work ethic; those moments are the ones that matter the most. Remember those moments, hold on to them.
#january#january 27th#birthday#aquarius#self care#self worth#self improvement#mental health#reading#books#food#vote#physical health#personal finance#adulting#college#community college#university#movies#college life#study motivation#30th birthday#you are valid#you are worthy#lgbtqia
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[anon: Can you write a nsfw alfabet with Smoke, if you haven't written one yet?] sorry i havent gotten to this one yet!!!! didnt mean to keep you waiting anon. im a little bit behind on requests, but here i am!!! i also wanna thank yall for the support, i really didn't expect to get a whole lotta numbers on my writing since this is all for self-indulgence really T_T. i appreciate each and every one of yall
cw: NSFW, amab, bondage, body worship, dry humping, little mention of blowjobs, not proofread MINORS DNI
ᴛᴏᴍᴀꜱ ᴠʀʙᴀᴅᴀ || ɴꜱꜰᴡ ᴀʟᴘʜᴀʙᴇᴛ
A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)
Tomas' HOBBY is taking care of you. Out of everyone, I think he is the most attentive. He has an entire checklist. First, he checks in with you. He makes sure you're okay afterward, he asks how the sex was, and sometimes he'll ask about his performance. He likes opening up the discussion because it shows him what he could do better, what you like, and what you'd like to try. Next, he's gonna cuddle up to you. Hold you all close, play with your hair, and pepper your face with kisses. After that, he'll carry you off to the shower and wash up, still peppering you with kisses. He just can't get his mind off your damn lips. Before you fall asleep, he insists on giving you a massage, and getting you a snack and some water, too. He'll even light some incense, as well. He's got all sorts of essential oils for you, like a whole library. And once he's finished his checklist, he keeps you close. Even in his sleep. He loves it when you lay your head on his chest.
B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)
His favorite body part of his is his shoulders. They make him feel especially strong. He also thinks they hold the story of his journey, from hunting with his family to becoming a ninja with the Lin Kuei. Not to mention, they help a lot with hunting, mainly with a bow. Regardless, he's just proud of how far he has come, and he believes his shoulder specifically show that.
On you, he loves your lips. Your entire face, really. But he can never get enough of your lips. How soft & inviting they are, how warm, it's just so hard to stay away from them. He always finds himself sneaking quick kisses from you in public. He also loves heavy make-out sessions, doesn't matter if they lead to sex or not. He just enjoys the feeling of your lips on his.
C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)
Tomas prefers to cum inside, he thinks it's kind of like marking what's his. It also feels more intimate. But if you don't want him to, then he'll cum outside. And he kind of likes it, too. He likes how it looks on your stomach, particularly. He also loves to kiss you when he cums, it's even more intimate to him.
D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)
Just how much he wishes he could see you masturbate. Yeah, he can ask, but he's too nervous to. He can only imagine you, too caught up, pleasuring yourself, moaning out his name, whimpering. Yearning for him.
E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)
He's got some experience, just enough to know what he's doing. But he learns more with you, maybe a little too much. Because he's comfortable with you, he really likes exploring your body. And through that, he's learned of all your little quirks and such. He especially loves dragging his hand down your chest and your stomach, he finds that it makes you shiver quite a bit.
F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)
Good ol' missionary. Tomas prefers to see your face, and missionary is perfect. Keeps you two close, he can kiss you whenever, however he likes. And he gets to give you as much pleasure as possible. But, if you're feeling like a little bit of a workout, he also likes London Bridge, he just really likes to get in there deep. But he also loves holding you by the small of your back.
G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)
He's serious. Like Bi-Han, sex is a very sacred act to him. It's one of the things that can establish a deeper bond with you, and he prefers to keep the tone serious. He wants you to take it seriously, too.
H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)
He's smoooooth, baby. No chest hair, no pubic hair, no nothing. He likes it that way.
I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)
He's amongst the sweetest. Sex is one of the deeper connections between you, so he makes sure you know he loves you. He'll outright say it, yes, but his actions speak louder than words. Mainly his attraction to your lips, he loves kissing you any chance he gets. He also loves it when you moan into his mouth. But he also spends ample time tracing your body, kissing down your neck, your chest, your stomach, all of your body. He needs you to know he loves every part of your body. Not to mention the words he'll say. He tells you exactly what he loves about you, he'll speak to you in Czech. Doesn't matter if you don't know it, sometimes he can't find the words in English. He also calls you all sorts of sweet things, Miláček, Drahoušek, Medvídek, Kotě.
J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)
He doesn't really need to jack off that much. Maybe like thrice in two weeks? But he prefers you, so he doesn't jack off unless he really can't get you off his mind.
K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)
Body Worship. All the way. Tomas loves taking his sweet time with you, admiring every little bit about you. He especially loves all the delicious little sounds you make as he goes along, how you reach for him. He loves knowing of your yearning.
He also enjoys dry humping. Knowing that the gratification of skin on skin contact is so close but so far. Grinding up against you, moaning out your name, begging for you as if he isn't doing this to himself. He also loves it when you grinding up against his knee.
Sensory Play is another another one he enjoys. Blindfolding you, mainly. But he does also enjoy light bondage. Tying you up and blindfolding you, containing yourself. He likes the idea of being able to do anything he wants to you, with consent of course. Seeing you try to wiggle out of your restraints as he enjoys your body, rubbing his hands down your legs, kissing your chest, all of that.
L = Location (favorite places to do the do)
Tomas actually prefers fucking outside in the forest. He likes the mood, it reminds him of the nights he'd hunt. It kind of brings something primal out of him! But he doesn't mind doing it in his room, or yours. He is kind of into shower/bath sex, as well. Even if it doesn't require penetration, if he can still jack you off in the bath, he'll enjoy it.
M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)
As mentioned before, simply kissing you gets him off. He loves when just a small peck leads to a nice, passionate kiss, to a full on make-out session. Especially when you end up on top of him. But he also loves watching you fight. He knows you're skilled, but just watching you in action gets him a little excited.
N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)
He hates being teased. In any sort of way. He likes to keep the rhythm going, because he's very in the mood. So edging, or a ruined orgasm really doesn't fly in his book. He hates having to beg or ask for permission to cum.
O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)
He can go either way, he likes it when you give him head, but if you ask for him to go down on you, he doesn't mind either. He kind of likes it, regardless. He likes doing anything that makes you squirm with his touch, so if you want him to, gladly. But if you offer to give him head, he won't refuse. He loves it when you deepthroat him, especially.
P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)
He's got a moderate pace, not to fast, not to slow. Depends on the mood, really. If you two are having a quiet night, being soft with each other, he'll go slow & sensual. But, if things are getting heated, he's gonna go faster. And rougher, if you want. Especially in the woods, that's where he likes to fuck you pretty.
Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)
You'd have to convince him. If you two haven't been able to enjoy sex for about a month, he's okay with it. He knows the importance of sex, and just releasing that energy once in a while. But if you two have time for a full-fledged night, then he'd prefer you two wait until then.
R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)
He's perfectly fine with where he is. He isn't really comfortable with risks or experimenting, he thinks he's doing fine as is. And he knows you feel good with him, so to him there's no point.
S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)
Alllll night. And maybe shower sex, afterwards. But he's all tuckered out in the morning. Because of his training (and prior hunting), he has more than enough stamina. He just needs at least a day to recover, if you do go all night.
T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)
Not really, only the needs to tie you up in light bondage. But if you have toys, he'll gladly use them, and incorporate them into sex regularly. He loves giving you the extra boost of pleasure.
U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)
Tomas doesn't tease, he's probably the fairest out of the roster. Because he hates being teased, he won't tease you in any way. Even if you argue that his extensive body-worship routine is teasing. You both know it's not.
V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)
Depends on the mood. If it's a sensual night, he's rather quiet, moaning directly into your ear. But if you two are out in the woods, and he's goin' rough, he'll be a lot louder, even growling a bit. Actually, some of the words he says has a bit of a growl to it, too.
W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)
Sometimes, when he's real into it, he has a little bit of a Czech accent. Obviously, when he's speaking Czech. But even some phrases in English will have a little bit of accent to it. Especially when he's closer to your ear. It's not something you hear much, since he's been with the Lin Kuei longer than he had been in Prague.
X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)
Tomas is a grower, 6.2" in length when hard, 1.6" wide. Leans slightly to the right, and moderately veiny.
Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)
He's really just ready whenever you are. His sex drive isn't the highest, but it isn't low, either. He's patient, he can wait until whenever.
Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)
Depends on how long you two went on for. If it was all night, all he can really do is finish his aftercare checklist, and then he'll pass right out on your chest. But if you two only went for like three rounds, he's making an effort to stay up until you're asleep.
#⁺◟sentooo#mk1 x reader#mk x reader#mortal kombat 1 x reader#mortal kombat x reader#mk1 x male reader#mk x male reader#mortal kombat 1 x male reader#mortal kombat x male reader#tomas vrbada x reader#smoke x reader#tomas vrbada x male reader#smoke x male reader
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Looking for your Input for IF Patreon
Hello my friends and neighbors! I hope you are all safe and well. I had some things to share with you and I am once again fishing for thoughts and opinions.
Like many of us who create these IFs, I am strongly considering a Patreon. I have no plans to go exclusively to Patreon, so don't fret. I want to make extra content to go along with any IF I work on, and I'd like to be able to put more things into these projects such as real art (including character portraits), and not just the stuff I flounder through on Canva. I'd like to pay my artist a fair wage and devote more of my time to this. Getting some support would help me allocate even more to these projects and extras. I'm testing the waters here to see if it's sustainable for both myself and subscribers as well. I do not know what timeframe I'm looking at to start this either.
I only want to do this if it's worth the while for everybody, so I'm putting out feelers and asking for your input.
Most of all - I want to know what you want in a Patreon sub. I also want to know what you feel to be a fair sub price for different tiers. Over the years, when I have been able, I have subbed to help support my favorite creators at all different levels. So, I have some ideas on what I am looking for in a subscription, what keeps me coming back, and what prices are both fair for the effort of the creator as well as for my pocket. But, what suits me may not be what you want, so that's why I need some feedback.
Below, I have compiled my ideas, so far, for possible tiers. None of these are set in stone, just a framework to build on to see if I'm on the right track. At the bottom is a poll (of course, it's like my favorite thing), and is probably the first of a few about this topic I will use. I welcome comments and suggestions on this topic. Tell me what you are looking for in a Patreon. What do you want from one each month? What keeps you subscribed? Please feel free to comment below or to send comments and suggestions via the Ask inbox, especially if you prefer to be anon (do let me know if you do not want your response posted - I may post some that either have questions or that I find relevant to the conversation).
I still do not know for certain what the ultimate future of God-Cursed will look like (meaning when it is all finished). I've played with the idea of eventually refining it to sell on itch and/or Steam. I have to admit that being able to do so would really feel like a huge accomplishment to me. I've always had dreams of being published and such, and it feels like a part of that dream. I, personally, prefer to buy IFs through either platform whenever I can. It supports my favorite authors, shows my appreciation, it compiles my favorite stories into an easy-to-find library, and I can relive my favorite stories over and over easily. So, needless to say, this is calling to me more and more.
Anyway, what I have come up with so far for possible offerings are these. Please let me know if something like this would work for you or if you have any suggestions for improvement:
An appreciation/tip jar - if the other tiers aren't for you or you just want to give a little love. Subscribers could get updates and public posts, and participation in polls.
A "Supporter" level - all the other stuff plus GC demo releases 1 month (30 days) in advance. I debated about the time, but I want to really make the early access feel worth it. This level would also be privy to some "insider" info (things cut, character development, the egregious typos, etc…). Of course there would be some sort of dev-log to go with this as well.
A "Plus" tier - all the above plus early release of demos for other IFs, more "behind the scenes" type things, and I'm thinking some POVs and other extra content (some interactive) such as short stories. These extras need not be exclusive to IFs either if anyone is interested in other things I write.
"SMUT" or "Spicy" tier - (being very honest, I'd be the most excited for this tier, lol) all the above including all things smut for each IF. This will include interactive extras, short stories, and any other horny content we want. Likely will run some polls and take suggestions for the spice you desire each month.
"Smut plus" (lol) - all the above, PLUS a patreon-only IF that I will have in the works (so, access to 3 projects in total). I have an idea for an IF that will focus on 1 RO at a time (each with their own complete and unique story within the same world), and I am itching to write it even if updates for it will be a bit slow. It will be more like a traditional dating sim type thing and may comprise all sorts of genres. This may be one that would be good for just subscribing on months that will have updates, and that's something I would probably post about publicly so if you're just interested in getting access, you don't have to worry about staying subbed.
And finally a sort of "Power Supporter" tier - this may be like a limited number sort of thing and be a bit pricey (not sure yet how much). You'd get a custom interactive story set in whatever world of mine you want that can be spicey or not. You'd give me all your MC's details (mostly cannon things but some liberties could be taken), physical traits and personality, and pick your RO and/or other desired characters. I'd take prompts or ideas from you as well concerning what you'd like in the story. You want a sexcapade - you can have that. You want to have tea with Oswin and his weird twin sisters - you got it. The main limitations are spoilers, of course, especially for any mystery ROs depending on when and if this all comes to pass. There may be some subject-matter that I will not write about, but I'd let you know what is out of bounds for me.
Naturally, I would also pop your name in the credits, I just don't know which tier that should go on.
So, there you have it. This has been on my mind for a while and I've gotten some questions and messages asking about if I will do something like this, so I'd like to give it a go at least.
Looking forward to hearing your ideas and desires! ^_^
~Lunan
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*:・゚lose the crowd
characters; childe, alhaitham, beidou.
warning(s); minors do not interact. female AFAB reader. public sex & semi-public sex. modern au.
summary; they really can't help themselves when it comes to you, even if it's where anyone can see.
not proofread, but nonetheless i hope you enjoy my midterm stress-induced porn.
Childe
He's much more secretive about it than most would bother to be, but you can tell that he enjoys seeing you squirm.
It's not something he would ever outright admit—that he loves seeing his precious, beloved girlfriend get red in the face when he touches her on the crowded subway car. He doesn't say a word about how much he adores it, but you've learned to read his mannerisms.
"Tell me to stop, and I will," he warns, the heat of his voice warm against the crook of your neck. It's almost as distracting as the warm press of his fingers against the heat of your pussy. His hand was shoved haphazardly up your skirt, trembling lightly with what must be desire.
This had all started because you had teased him about foregoing underwear for your little date. You should know better than to provoke his overactive libido in public, but you honestly couldn't help yourself—not even in a space full of people. Your boyfriend's actions are only concealed by the closeness of everyone's bodies. A woman's elbow pokes your back as she types something out on her phone. A man's shoulder is pressed against Ajax's, their bodies jostling in unison as the subway moves.
Everyone is so preoccupied with themselves that they don't even bother to look down and notice the way Ajax's fingers are playing with your clit, heavy and teasing in their movements. You come just like that, your little noises muffled into Ajax's hair.
Did anyone notice? Did everyone notice? You would never know for sure, although you can't help but admit everyone was probably suspicious of how conspicuously Ajax wiped his fingers clean afterwards.
Alhaitham
The University's library was not a place Alhaitham often found himself. Usually, he preferred to study within the walls of his own home, where the little tics and movements of others around him would not interfere with whatever he was thinking.
It also allowed him to avoid prying eyes. Although, he supposes he's inviting that kind of attention right about now.
"Haitham, stop teasing," you groan, somehow so quiet despite the annoyance in your tone. "If we're going to do this, you have to put it in, now. Please."
"You don't want me to take my time?" He asks dryly, as if his cock was not pressed against you, hard and quite clearly very willing. "You are the one who asked me to do this here instead of waiting to get home."
You're pressed face first against a bookshelf, your weight being supported only by your propped up arms and his hands at your waist. It's almost maddening, how good you look like this—engulfed in the low light of the library with your pants shoved to your knees. If anyone were to peek into this secluded corner and see the sight of you, Alhaitham would think they were quite lucky.
Someone may get to see you, reddened and desperate to come, but that doesn't matter to him. Not when he is the one who gets to fuck you against piles of dusty old books, taking you apart in every way he knows how.
He tells you so, while he's fucking you so hard up against the shelf you're seeing stars.
Beidou
Beidou does not particularly enjoy losing her cool.
It takes a lot for her to forget the rules she put in place for herself. Rules like keep your dignity and don't get blackout drunk where impressionable children can see. She may not appreciate it, but she does have a reputation to uphold.
A reputation you don't mind grinding to dust, it seems.
Business dinners. A rare thing for Beidou to participate in for sure. And she may never get to be apart of one again, with the way this one is turning out.
She isn't even sure how you managed to get underneath the table without anyone noticing. Your pretty dress is being soiled with wrinkles as you crouch on the floor, your hair tangled into knots from where Beidou has a hand twisted into it. Her eyes are pointedly not staring at the way your tongue is lapping at her exposed skin.
The table is large, and each person has a wide girth of their own personal space. Beidou herself sits at the head of the table, as a venerated guest. She almost wished her hosts were less accommodating so you did not get this damned idea in the first place.
However, she has to admit coming on your tongue while onlookers speak to one another ignorantly did make the evening much more enjoyable.
#genshin x reader#genshin impact x reader#genshin impact imagines#childe x reader#alhaitham x reader#beidou x reader#genshin impact smut#genshin smut#beidou smut#childe smut#alhaitham smut#!!lie is writing
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Getting Involved Locally
Every time I see a post implying the only two politically relevant actions you can take in America are voting or not voting in federal elections, I tell myself I will make this post, so now I am finally doing it.
As an American, it can be frustrating and dispiriting to feel like we're being held hostage by our politicians while the United States continues to be one of the biggest forces for suffering on a global scale. This post is not about what we can do on that scale but instead suggests that, if you're feeling powerless and depressed about your national/international impact, you can take action on the local level. I got involved with a local activist group a few years ago, and we've been able to tangibly help people in our community, get genuine policy passed, and net some legislative wins. It's much easier to influence a smaller system, and a lot more rewarding than doomscrolling on social media.
Disclaimer: I am an American who lives on the outskirts of a fairly large city. This post reflects my experience and not everything in it may be applicable to yours. Take what is useful and leave the rest.
What's out there?
There are a variety of ways to get involved locally depending on your preferences. I'm going to lump them into a few categories:
Local government. City council, school boards, library boards, etc. Many of these orgs have open meetings and allow public comment. They're often sparsely attended and members are frequently elected by small margins, so they're far more likely to listen to what you have to say than federal legislators. Check out your home's website to see if you can find minutes and agendas to learn what they're discussing and how you can weigh in. Great choice if you want to develop a first name basis nemesishood with a local politician.
Volunteering. If you have low bandwidth and just want someone to tell you what to do, but would like to know your actions immediately benefit real people, volunteering gigs might be for you. Lots of organizations need help! Community kitchens, greenspace cleanups, giving immigrants rides to appointments, phonebanking, tutoring, supporting cultural centers, etc. Find orgs connected to something you're interested in and see what they need.
Organizing. Organizing involves long term work to build groups of people who can push for change. Outside of labor unions, there are tenant unions (renters pushing their landlords for better conditions) and groups organizing around a specific issue. (Off the top of my head, in my area I'm aware of multiple groups organizing around abolition/decarceration, minimum wage, environmental justice, transit, and reproductive justice.) These groups require more commitment, but that also means you'll have more input than showing up to volunteer for a nonprofit a few times a month.
(The group I'm currently involved with is organizing-focused, so if you're curious I'm happy to share more details of what that's like, I just don't want this post to be even longer.)
How can I learn about opportunities?
Word of mouth
Local government websites
Library, college, and community center bulletin boards
Local events (I tabled at a music festival last summer)
Protests and rallies
Local news outlets (might be covering actions, etc.)
Social media
Google (try 'mutual aid' and your location)
Start getting involved. I cannot express how much I've learned about the activist landscape in my city just from joining one org. Between partnerships, solidarity requests, etc., so many groups are now on my radar that weren't before. As I said before, I'm in/near a fairly big city, but you might be surprised by how much is going on where you are!
A note on self-interest
Something we talk about in organizing is self-interest. Why are you passionate about this cause? Why are you in this fight? Identifying your self-interest is important for a few reasons. First, it helps you convince other people to care. Second, it keeps you engaged. If you start volunteering out of a vague sense that you're 'helping', it's much easier to lose interest. If you recognize how winning this fight makes your life better, you're more likely to stick with it. I'm not saying you should only get involved in causes that immediately materially benefit you, but it's worth thinking about your personal stake so that you can return to that when you think 'ugh I don't want to get out of bed for this meeting'. You may have seen the quote credited to Lilla Watson and a group of other Aboriginal Rights activists: "If you have come here to help me, you are wasting your time. But if you have come because your liberation is bound up with mine, then let us work together."
In conclusion
This is work. I've spent weekends in campaign retreats and driven 45 minutes across the city to make care packages. I am doing group projects and not even getting paid for it. But when you're frustrated with the state of the world, it's nice to be able to roll up your sleeves and make a visible impact on something you can control. It's also a great way to meet people irl who care about the same things as you and learn ways we can support each other when larger structures let us down.
As yet another American election season draws near with its avalanche of posts about voting, whether you intend to vote or post on tumblr about how much voting sucks or are a long-suffering non-American cursed to always see this shit, I challenge you to take a step* into your community and tackle a problem there. Who knows? You might even help solve it.
*Virtually if necessary. Many orgs try to be accessible. I attend many of my org's meetings on zoom!
#idk if this is actually helpful in any way#I'm happy to talk more about what being in an organizing-focused group has been like for me#also sorry I turned reblogs off bc I did not want this somehow turning into voting discourse
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On June 23, 2021, You Tube announced that any Pre-2017 unlisted videos will be made private on July 23, 2021. Why? BTW this is an attempt to raise awareness about an event few fans may even know took place and highlight the importance of supporting archiving projects. It's written by those directly involved - any re-blogs are appreciated. An example of a rescued vid is at the end. Security update: Why? You Tube screwed up when it first developed unlisted videos. There was a loophole. Any unlisted video that was added to a playlist would automatically be made public. Oops! June 23, 2021 was when they made a formal announcement about their efforts to rectify it. You Tube's Solution? - Blanket privatization of ALL pre-2017 unlisted videos & then apply the security update for all new unlisted videos going forward. What if you don't want your pre-2017 unlisted videos to be made private? Filling out a form telling You Tube to do nothing is one option. Great for people who don't mind filling forms to send to You Tube. Make your videos public. 🤨 or download them and reupload them then make them unlisted with the new update. 🙄 You can watch the video below for descriptions of all the options. Most not ideal. Official Video: Released June 23, 2021. You can watch it whenever if you want to, but I must say contrary to what one would expect it is a very clear explanation without too much technical jargon. However, it doesn't really explain the obvious ramifications of this.
youtube
What are the freaking Ramifications: You Tube is 18 years old. What?!?!! 😲 Yeah, I know. Any pre-2017 videos would account for more than half of You Tube's history (11 years) and therefore fandom's history on You Tube. How many fans would be aware they had a 30-day notice and could act in time? Were you even aware of this?
More Issues: More importantly, how many users with abandoned accounts with noteworthy, valuable unlisted fanvids are no longer around to fill out a form. How many "Dead Embeds" would be the result of this when the videos go private. Many prefer to Unlist and Embed on other sites. Unlisted is not the same as private. It only means the videos can't be searched and found on You Tube but is available to anyone with a link or Embed. Private basically means no longer accessible and limited to people who were emailed a link directly.
There were only 2 people in Fandom (to my knowledge) who worked on rescuing content like that. We had about 2 weeks before the July 23, 2021 deadline to archive about 11 years of Pre-2017 unlisted fanvids and ask questions later. One of those people was Morgan Dawn and the other was myself. Other archive teams did work on this but their focus was on other types of videos related gaming, political history, anime, etc. Essentially non-fandom. In a nutshell, our collaboration led to the rescue approximately 12K unlisted fan videos. 12K fanvids that would have been made private forever and unable to be seen. The Work About 50% of that total came from accounts that had never uploaded a video since 2018. The work involved required more technical knowledge & resources than we had ever used before on any prior archive projects. There were several brand-new archive techniques we developed specifically out of necessity during that intense time period. One example was renting multiple virtual machines to sift through thousands of playlists just to find a fraction of unlisted videos. There was so much at stake. What happened with the content that was archived?
To my knowledge, there isn't an Open Doors for fanvids. There is just a few dedicated individuals who may be bad at promoting their work. Let's face it, when there is a fire at a library you marshal all resources to save as many books as you can and worry about everything else later. If archiving speaks to you whether that is fanzine, oral history or fanvid related, then there are certain things you can do:
Follow this Tumblr (we will post about relevant projects here)
If you have time, ask us how you can volunteer on projects and see if what we offer works for you. You can always opt out.
Re-blog this so that maybe someone who does have time sees this.
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This kind of work is done by very few people and not necessarily by those you would think would do this type of work. It can fly under the radar and so can support. This is an attempt to raise awareness which sometimes we are too busy to take time to do. If support doesn't go to the right places projects like this may never have happen or may not be as successful as they could be. This Unlisted You Tube Project is a perfect example of something a lot of fans may not be aware even took place. Thank you for whatever method of support you choose. The following experience was brought to you by archiving.
The following vid is one of the 12k saved. It's a Kirk/Spock vid. You will not find this vid anywhere but here. I know. I went to the original vidder's You Tube Channel https://www.youtube.com/@xKelociraptor and they have other vids on there. Last vid uploaded 11 years ago and no contact info. You want to know the kicker? I looked at all the other vids they have available but the best one (in my opinion) is the one that was unlisted & rescued. Unlisted vids are not necessarily unfinished projects or bad takes of a final version that should not see the light of day. They can in some cases be the best vids you will never see.
If you liked this post you might like this:
The last vidder friendly hosting & streaming site?
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can i request for newjeans x reader when their s/o is smart, has a cute eyesmile with dimples, a hopeless romantic, probably a nerdy partner whose very mature? thank you!
a/n: not writing for my kiddo hyein! might add platonic hyein on a later date
Anon.. are u insinuating you’re all of the above? Dimples? Cute eyesmile? Nerdy? Smart? You’re mighty fine.
Minji
Have you seen how she reacts when Hanni initiates skinship with her? Not the most touchy person, me thinks, but would love to hold you close regardless, preferably looping your hands around each others’ when reading or in the car ( because she wants to appear calm and collected, she would not be able to concentrate if u pull out surprise kisses)
Quick reflexes- the sort that catches you when you fall, catches your phone mid air when it falls, puts a hand around sharp corners of furniture you’re around
Would totally handle a dramatic or even awkward s/o well, have you seen the girls she lives with…
Would find you endearing if you’re too shy to make the first move, and would totally entertain you if you turn out to be very expressive
Eye Smile(s) on 3..2..1..
Both minji and your smiles would emanate so much light, she thinks your eye smile is very endearing, would probably take a polaroid to keep the memory fresh and lovely for when she needs it
Would be so excited she has her own set of dimples to poke-(not on her face but yours), would be such a curious girl, always wanting to touch it or would very unlike herself, doing something dumb to make you smile and show your dimples to her
I actually think minji has a jealous streak.. If she sees you, albeit jokingly, acting out romantic tv lines with another member, she’d not want to show her jealousy, but it wouldn’t take long for you to find out
She appreciates emotional maturity, intellectual depth
In essence, she’s appreciative of how you take care of her when she is willing to be vulnerable around you
You know when she wants to talk, you’re mature enough to listen to whatever she has to talk about without laughing, she would genuinely want to just get it over and done with when talking about what upsets her, would not want to ruminate on negative thoughts
I would think intellectually stimulating conversations about whatever subject matter would be something she genuinely values
She likes when you can hold your ground, support your argument by reasoning well, that you aren’t easily influenced by groundless assumptions.
She’d love to have these conversations with her members as well, but I think with how hard she can be on herself it may lead to the result of her members overthinking, so she turns to you.
Academic rivals turned friends could very well be possible here with how competitive she is..
May have expounded more on intellect because that’s what I like as well hehe
Hanni
The dynamic I see would totes be failing student x top student here
I see her as not a dumb student, but one that procrastinates a lot and flips through a page or two of her books before the exam
Doing revision with her while you focus on grading her work and she focuses on the dimples that show even when you frown, giggles
The sort to get you kicked out of the library on accident
She would be so proud of you when grade rankings are made public to the entire school and you always place number one
“MY Y/N GOT FIRST PLACE AGAIN”
Would tell everyone and their mama about it
Will melt when she sees you, a student from another discipline, taking up extra classes or doing research to be able to coach her on a paper to save her grade.
Grateful towards you that you give in to her requests and shelter her even if you know you don’t have to, even if you’re happy to
Getting her snacks, giving her your sweaters even when you’re cold, pretending you’re not affected by the a/c blasting cold air onto you during study dates
Probably has you geeking out over something as her chat wallpaper unbeknownst to you
Random, but asks you to hold 423 things for her because she loses her things easily, yet you know where every single item is
Hopeless romantic x hopeless romantic, thing one and thing two
Ice cream dates
You’d suggest a cafe and ask her come along to try out a new flavour, she’d probably eat so messily yet not bring along tissues and you’d have to use a handkerchief to wipe off the ice cream that found it way to her cheek, while she looks at you with those eyes
Likes your eye smile so much, if it’s not only reserved for her she might lowkey pretend to be upset about it
HATES IT when she sees you outright being taken advantage of.
You being you take it to the next level by writing notes for other students in class to aid their understanding yet they don’t take you seriously and continue asking for your help at times, being very confusing
You’d have to hold her back from beating up every single one of them, and she would be so angry on your behalf yet cherish you even more because of how unconditionally kind you are
Use your big brain to your advantage, engage with her when she rambles on about what she overthinks about, yet guide her to focus her energy on self improvement rather than self blame, if any
Danielle
Sunshine and sunshine protector, nothing else
Miss Danielle loves listening and sharing her little observations, so her partner having so much knowledge would be so attractive, she knows she can rely on you if she wants to find out more about her topic of interest.
Hear me out here…
She would probably make a powerpoint about your subject of interest on special days, and try to learn about what you like, but get a fact or two wrong but you’d be so encouraged by her efforts.
Being brought up to be very loving, Dani would be comfortable expressing her cheeky side with you.. Ever seen her as a kid? Lowkey chaotic
So it's no surprise if she knits you something, you wear it for important events, even if it sounds cringe, for competitions and all that.
Theatre kid Dani will not let you be a hopeless romantic on your own, you have my word
I would think she know how to ground herself, enjoy alone time, but when she misses you or wants you around she lets you know upfront, very communicative
She may be young and has lots to learn, but she’s very humble and earnest in wanting to grow with you
She wouldn’t be afraid of communicating across her anxieties with growing up, hate, or even when there are disputes within the members, partly because she knows you can be trusted, and you always manage to comfort her
Nothing but continual praises for your dimples on Phoning, will probably ask you to show her your dimples 4323 times a day, has a picture of you everyday with an eye smile, so many she could probably make a calendar out of it, but you’d do anything she asks
Will turn into a ball of mush if you make sudden eye contact with her and show that glorious eye smile of yours
Haerin
Quiet kid haerin x nerd that is so cute cmon
She would probably be dozing off in class, and when she gets called to answer a question she freezes
You jump to her rescue by pointing out that there’s a flaw in the question and sit down immediately
Her eyes become glued to you for the rest of the day, while you tell yourself you must be dreaming when you feel a pair of feline eyes on you
“Cute” she thinks when she sees your eye smile after seeing a big red 100 on your script, not knowing she says it out loud, she wonders why you’re turning so red and is currently using your script to cover your face.
Excuse me as I digress but…
VANESSA KANG x nerd (hmmm stuco treasurer and stuco secretary in an elite school)
I pulled this out my ass but might end up writing a whole fic for it
Only started talking because they are the admin backbones of stuco, and eventually it blooms into a r/s
Your positions were always thought to be background work, but in reality you have to plan so much and bear the brunt of the teachers’ wrath when something unexpected happens and the school’s reputation is at stake
Many many breakdowns and restless nights ensued, and late night calls between the two of you to plan out school events took place
Though you two were not the most sociable, your eye smile was pretty lethal, and she fell for it as well
She may or may not have given in to her intrusive thoughts one day, and reached out to poke your cheek because she though it looked so soft it’d feel like bread dough
You found it utterly adorable, and her little actions always seemed to be so subtle yet eye catching to you
You could live with not watching hunks play basketball during recess but you couldn’t miss haerin’s escapades to the nearby park during break, in fact, you’d probably accompany her
Tying her laces, afraid she falls
Letting her doodle all over your notes and joining her with coming up with ridiculous names for the doodles
The sort of couple that will name a cat dog and a dog cat.
I honestly think that haerin has her own way of feeling out whether or not someone is a good match for her, and that is how they can manage to be on the same linguistic wavelength; how they can reciprocate with her energy and how spontaneous they can become. Hence, I didnt really focus on physical traits so much with haerin, and I think the same goes with Danielle.
#newjeans fluff#newjeans imagines#gg fluff#gg imagines#gg x reader#newjeans#minji scenarios#minji#minji imagines#newjeans minji#minji fluff#danielle#newjeans hanni#newjeans danielle#danielle imagines#hanni pham#hanni imagines#newjeans haerin#kang haerin#haerin x reader#haerin
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(un)welcome visitors
Rafael Barba x gn!reader
"I didn't know every coffee maker between here and the DA's office mysteriously combusted."
He purses his lips in a humorless smile, leaning against the wooden sideboard and tapping his fingers impatiently as the machine heats up. "Carmen's out sick," he explains, his voice clipped. "The coffee stand's closed, and even I can't make myself drink the courthouse sludge."
Rafael may be using you for your coffee maker, but when a personal issue arises he offers some unexpected support.
tags: established friendship, fluff, mutual pining, hint of family angst on the reader's side, gender neutral reader, no y/n, no reader physical description
word count: 1400
note: it's only vaguely alluded to but reader is a law librarian at the county law library, which happens to be located right across from 1 hogan :) essentially you research, gather, and analyze legal materials for the public, courts, and recently a certain ADA
read on ao3 here
You lean back in your office chair with an amused grin. "Nice to see you too, Barba."
The man currently beelining it to your office's single cup coffee machine doesn't have the good grace to look chagrined. Rafael shoves his thermos underneath the spout, drops a pod in the machine, and slams the lid without even looking at you. "Yes, hello, you look good, how've you been," he rattles out dryly.
"You talking to me or the Keurig?"
The withering look he shoots you is mostly without teeth. It's not enough to deter you.
"I didn't know every coffee maker between here and the DA's office mysteriously combusted."
He purses his lips in a humorless smile, leaning against the wooden sideboard and tapping his fingers impatiently as the machine heats up. "Carmen's out sick," he explains, his voice clipped. "The coffee stand's closed, and even I can't make myself drink the courthouse sludge."
You raise your eyebrows.
He glances over, then does such an utterly offended double take that you have to turn your surprised snort into a cough. "That was under duress," he warns, raising a finger in your direction.
You can't help it.
"I come to you in my time of need and you mock me," he deadpans as you laugh.
"Right, except I was your third choice."
He opens his mouth to deliver what promises to be a scathing retort, but the machine chooses that moment to finally hiss to life and the aroma of vanilla beans starts to fill the office. Rafael sighs, and some of the bristling tension seeps out of his shoulders. You decide he's probably suffered enough.
"Look, not that I don't appreciate the visit," you lean forward on your elbows against the desk, "but have you ever thought about just buying one for yourself?"
You knew he rarely used the old drip maker collecting dust in his office, preferring to buy it fresh - or, when he's particularly desperate and can't get away, send Carmen out with his card. In fact, you weren't even sure the damn thing worked until you'd found half of SVU camped out in his office late one night, going over the details of a difficult case with the carafe passed around the table. But surely, when caffeine-withdrawal was at stake...
"Then people would ask to use it." Rafael's nose wrinkles at the thought as he watches the thermos fill.
The stunning lack of self-awareness doesn't seem to register.
"Hmm," you hum, "says the man raiding my coffee stash." He blinks, pausing as he screws the thermos lid on. "The man with his own snack budget at the 16th."
He rolls his eyes. "They should consider it payment for goods and services." He says it with no small amount of smarm, but as he turns towards the loveseat you managed to cram into the corner of your small office, you watch him cradle the warm thermos in his hands like a prized possession.
"Speaking of," you say slowly, reaching down into the bottom drawer of your desk and tossing the contents to him. "Here."
He deftly catches the bag, and you feel inordinately pleased when you see his eyes light up at the chicago-style popcorn. "What's this for?"
Because you see how hard he works. Because you like that your office has become a place he frequents. Because you want him to stay a little while longer.
Because you're starting to like him more than the professional bounds of your positions, even the personal warmth of your friendship, and a small, foolish part of you can't help but hope he might feel the same way.
You clear your throat a little, shifting under the way his observant gaze turns thoughtful at your silence. "Let's just say Sergeant Benson isn't the only one with a snack budget."
He huffs a laugh, murmurs his thanks, and just like that any moment you imagined is gone.
With warm drink and food in hand, he finally collapses into the old, worn loveseat. He settles, sinking into the cushions and letting his eyes flutter shut as he tips his head back with a sigh, the long line of his neck and hint of scruff bared above his slightly loosened tie. You give him a moment, quietly shuffling some papers around, trying not to think about the warmth in your chest at seeing him so comfortable in your own space.
It isn't until he sits back up, taking a sip from his thermos with a pleased hum, that you speak, your voice quiet. "So how are you Raf, really?"
"Tired." He breaks open the popcorn. "Sick of fighting off motions for this case. You?"
You grimace, thinking about the pile of work growing in your inbox. "About the same."
"Well aren't we a pair." He gives a little crooked smile as he says it, and you try not to look too pleased with his choice of words.
You settle into quiet conversation - about his mother (she's doing well, and he talks about her work at the charter school with no small amount of pride), about the latest inter-office gossip (there's at least two affairs going on but he only complains about O'Dwyer's latest promotional pet project), about the request his office sent over yesterday (you're already working on the case analyses).
He's just explaining what details he'd like you to look out for when there's a light rap at your door.
Rafael pauses. You unconsciously straighten in your seat before you call out. "Yes?"
The door creaks open and one of the front desk assistants steps just inside the threshold. "I'm sorry to interrupt." She looks between you and Rafael, then turns back to you. "But your father is here to see you."
You blink.
"That can't be right," you frown. "My parents don't even live in the city."
She glances again at Rafael - who's watching you intently over his thermos - before she turns back to you with a strained smile. "Just passing along what he said," she says, her voice apologetic.
"Did he give a name?"
When she says it you sigh, cursing internally. "Alright, I'll... I'll be down in a minute. Thank you."
And with that, she nods at you both and closes the door behind her. In the ensuing silence, the easy, friendly air from before seems to have been sucked out of the room after her.
"Should I go?"
"No." Your reply is fast enough that Rafael'e eyebrows raise in surprise. "No, I'll just see what he wants and send him home. He shouldn't even be - I can't believe he's - fuck." You trail off into a groan of frustration, burying your head in your hands.
"One of those, huh," he says softly. It's not spoken as a question.
"Yeah," you mutter into your hands.
"Want me to scare him off?"
You know he's just trying to lighten the mood but your heart still jumps when you look up at him, foolish and half hope. "Would you?"
It slips out before you can stop it but you can't regret asking, not when he holds your gaze with a kind of warmth and sincerity he usually can't afford to show.
"For you?" he murmurs, "Of course."
You're proud that your next breath comes out relatively steady.
"Thank you," you say softly. "But you really don't need to get in the middle of my family drama."
His lips twitch into a wry, crooked smile. "I'm paid to get in the middle of family drama all the time. Yours is no trouble, trust me."
Your chest shakes with a laugh despite yourself, and his smile softens, his eyes crinkling. In the light of the setting sun from your window, it makes him look younger. Lighter.
It looks good on him.
"At least let me walk you down."
He never was one to give up on a tough case. If you're honest with yourself, you never want him to stop.
"Alright, alright," you cede with a small smile. "It's a deal, counselor."
Looking entirely too pleased with himself, Rafael pushes up from the loveseat, thermos in hand. He takes his overcoat from the rack by the door and holds out your own, and your elbows brush as he steps out of your office behind you.
As the two of you walk down the hallway towards the elevator and whatever unpleasant surprise awaits you in the lobby, you realize that somehow - with Rafael beside you - you don't dread it.
#inspired by every Dad Issues ep and trying to thread the needle between barba's softness & snark#rafael barba x reader#rafael barba x gn!reader#reader insert#definitely got a few more ideas for a law librarian reader#i feel like there aren't a lot of non-detective reader fics so i'm doin my part 🫡#s: pretty green eyes (you're reaching for my hand)
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Pinkdrunk Linkdump
Today (November 18) at 1PM, I'll be in Concord, NH at Gibson's Books, presenting my new novel The Lost Cause, a preapocalyptic tale of hope in the climate emergency.
On Monday (November 20), I'm at the Simsbury, CT Public Library at 7PM
Happy Saturday! As is so often the case, I have finished the week with more stray links that I can fit into my blog, so it's time for a linkdump post, in which an assorted assortment is assembled. This is my tenth such linkdump – here are the previous installments:
https://pluralistic.net/2023/11/05/variegated/#nein
While nostalgia is a toxic impulse (h/t John Hodgman), there's no denying that there once existed an old, good web, and that it has given way to the enshitternet. I don't want to bring the old, good web back, but I would welcome a new, good web, and by studying the factors that contributed to the old, good web's rise and fall, we can both conjure up that new, good web – and protect it.
Above all, the old, good web was contingent, a series of lucky accidents, like Tim Berners Lee's decision to make the code and ideas and protocols for the original web as open and free as possible:
https://pluralistic.net/2023/11/13/this-is-for-everyone/#revisiting
This meant that there was no way to use the law to capture the web. Contrast that with, say, AOL or Compuserve. If you were the Compuserve's CEO and one of your rivals started using your servers to deliver a service that your users preferred, which shifted value from you to this new rival, you could just pull the plug on them. If they came back – using reverse-engineering or fake signups or whatever – you could sue them. Compuserve's bosses made the rules, any rules they wanted, and could kick you off if you violated them. If you pressed the issue, they could get the government to come and fine you, or, in extreme situations, arrest you.
But the open web didn't have these enforcement hooks. If you ran an early website and Yahoo deeplinked to it, you could change the link, but you couldn't make Yahoo stop. The open web was competitive, and that prevented anyone from exercising a veto over who could make the web, and how. It meant that the web was always up for grabs, with key chokepoints like browser market share swinging around wildly from one vendor to another (until Microsoft started illegally tying blocking rival browsers in Windows).
That meant that the "governance" of the web was often just a matter of the technical details of its standards. Code may not be law, but it was sure law-like – if something was in, say, a W3C browser standard, then all the browsers would support it, and then anyone trying to do something cool on the internet could rely on every potential user having it.
Naturally, this made standards development organizations into the sites of vicious power-struggles. These SDOs are classic "weak institutions," lacking the robust rules of, say, a competition regulator, to say nothing of the investigative and enforcement powers of the DoJ:
https://pluralistic.net/2023/04/30/weak-institutions/
But in the old, good web days, the SDOs had an important advantage: the corporate fragmentation of the web. Because of TBL's decision not to create IP chokepoints, even the wildly overcapitalized companies of the go-go dotcom bubble days weren't able to control the web. No one company was indispensable to the web.
If Microsoft wanted to tilt a W3C standard to its advantage, it couldn't threaten to leave the consortium if it didn't get its way. For one thing, the consortium had such a diversity of membership that losing any one member's dues wouldn't sink the org's finances.
For another, if Microsoft boycotted the W3C, that would just mean that the web standards that all those other companies were making wouldn't reflect its priorities or desires. By staying in the W3C, Microsoft got to participate in rulemaking – if it left, it would be relegated to rule-taking.
But the DoJ and FTC spent the ensuing decades in something like a coma. After a failed bid to break up Microsoft – killed when GW Bush stole the 2000 election and dropped the case – America's antitrust enforcers snoozed through decades of consolidation, and the transformation of the old, good web into "five giant websites, filled with screenshots of text from the other four":
https://twitter.com/tveastman/status/1069674780826071040
This turned SDOs into increasingly fraught battlegrounds where giants duked it out among each other for control of the web. In the days of the old, good web, the W3C was able to continue TBL's chokepoint-free ethos, creating rules that forced members to surrender their patents at the door:
https://www.w3.org/Consortium/Patent-Policy-20040205/
But once the enthitternet was fully in force, the largest corporate members became so important to SDOs' ability to operate that even the W3C wasn't able to resist. They started turning out IP-encumbered standards that were so proprietary that even filing bug-reports against browsers could mean jailtime:
https://www.eff.org/deeplinks/2017/09/open-letter-w3c-director-ceo-team-and-membership
Within a couple years, it became functionally impossible to implement a web-browser without a license from one of a tiny handful of gigantic, monopolistic corporations, who could use the license to exercise a veto over both who could make a browser, and what that browser could do:
https://blog.samuelmaddock.com/posts/the-end-of-indie-web-browsers/
Standards development is one of those esoteric, hugely important activities that almost no one knows anything about. Good standards are key to an open, free internet, and as governments around the world grapple with Big Tech monopolies, their plans often include a block that basically reads "insert good standard here."
As exciting as the EU's Digital Markets Act and US proposals like the ACCESS Act are, the "insert good standard here" stuff is wildly underspecified and undertheorized. Making a good standard – one that is robust, flexible and secure – is hard enough even under competitive competitions where the SDO can play independent referee, more powerful than the participants. But making good standards under monopolistic conditions is really hard.
And yet, it happens! Look at the Fediverse, powered by Mastodon and its adaptation of a W3C standard called ActivityPub. The Fediverse has done more for an interoperable, decentralized web than all the other projects of the past decade combined:
https://fediverse.party/
How did something so useful and capture-resistant emerge from the enshitternet, from the same standards-body that gave us a proprietary "standard" that allowed three giant companies to seize the right to authorize the production of web browsers themselves?
Therein lies quite a tale. In a talk for this year's Association of Internet Researchers conference, Robert Gehl talks about the weird, highly contingent factors that delivered a fit-for-purpose Fediverse standard:
https://fossacademic.tech/2023/10/15/APnonStandard.html
Gehl starts by describing ActivityPub as a "non-standard standard." The technologists who created it at the W3C were largely unpreturbed by the Big Tech members, who viewed ActivityPub as unimportant, a folly. While this meant that the ActivityPub creators were free from Big Tech attempts to corrupt the standard, they were also insulated from the discipline of Big Tech standards people, who are expert at propelling a standard to completion while resolving conflicts to create a single, unified spec.
By contrast, ActivityPub's creators made seven different specs, resolving factional disputes by letting everyone get their way. Critical parts of these standards – including support for federation! – was marked as optional in group's charter.
Then along came Mastodon, implementing the draft spec for ActivityPub. This triggered two extensions to the deadline for ActivityPub's completion. ActivityPub moved to final draft against the backdrop of the real-world experiences of early Mastodon users. Four of the five ActivityPub authors self-identified as queer, and they set out to make Mastodon more harassment-resistant than corporate social media:
https://fossandcrafts.org/episodes/053-fediverse-reflections-while-the-bird-burns.html
The early success of Mastodon shifted the focus of ActivityPub authors and implementers. In Gehl's words, "half of ActivityPub" is now ignored. Gehl's essay shows how many needles Mastodon threaded to get to where it is today, and while there's an argument that there was a Fediverse-shaped hole in the internet that something was going to fill, the Mastodon-inflected flavor of ActivityPub we got is pretty great.
Gehl is working on a book about this for Oxford University Press, "Move Slowly and Build Bridges":
https://fossacademic.tech/2023/08/17/OxfordUP.html
One of the more contingent elements of the nascent new, good web is Signal, the secure, robust, easy-to-use encrypted messaging tool that has stepped in to fill the gap that encrypted email tools like PGP struggled to fill for years (though that doesn't mean that secure email is impossible!):
https://pluralistic.net/2022/05/01/end-to-end-encryption-is-too-important-to-be-proprietary/
Like Mastodon, Signal threaded a bunch of different needles to get to its current status, and it's still threading needles. In a new article, Signal's amazing new president, Meredith Whittaker and Joshua Lund explain what it costs to keep Signal running:
https://signal.org/blog/signal-is-expensive/
Bottom line: Signal costs $50m/year. The breakdown is fascinating and weird. Signal pays a fortune to send SMS messages to verify your number when you sign up. Here's an irony: as Signal displaces SMS, telcos are making up for lost revenue by charging Signal ever-higher rates to send those signup codes – Signal's spending $6m/year on SMSes!
Storage costs Signal another $1.3m/year. Servers are $2.9m/year. Bandwidth is $2.8m/year. Signal's storage and compute costs are low because they're privacy-first, so they're collecting, processing and storing as little data as possible. Add a couple more zeros per user to approximate the costs for high-surveillance alternatives to Signal.
Because Signal is end-to-end encrypted, they can use untrusted (and cheap) third parties for bandwidth, relaying and storage. Your phone encrypts the data before it leaves your device, and no one can decrypt it except the person you're talking to. That lets Signal shop around for server infra, saving much more. Even so, voice and video calls consume a lot of bandwidth, and it gets more expensive because they jump the connection through multiple servers to prevent the people you're talking to from capturing your IP address.
Signal's got 50 full-time employees – a "shockingly small" team by industry standards. But still: 50 developers, managers, designers, accountants, etc all add up to $19m/year (the org pays "as close to industry wages as possible within the boundaries of a nonprofit").
As Signal scales up, it is discovering new and exciting bugs and problems. A one-in-a-billion bug that may never crop up in a small service can suddenly start occurring on a daily basis once you hit scale. That means Signal will continue to hire engineers to crush these weird little bugs, and they're going to be the kinds of specialists who can preserve privacy while fixing servers.
Signal is amazing. It's been six years since they figured out how to transmit userids, numbers and photos as fully encrypted blobs. Not one of their competitors – not even the "secure" ones from giant Big Tech companies – have managed this. Even Signal's system for embedding animated GIFs is privacy-preserving – the system doesn't reveal your search terms to the GIF repositories.
Today, Signal is tooling up to create "post-quantum resistance" to the system, anticipating the arrival of functional quantum computers that will (theoretically) make short work of existing encryption techniques.
The article ends – logically enough – with a plea for donations. I'm a Signal donor already:
https://signal.org/donate/
The Signal and ActivityPub stories reveal the important interplay between principled individuals and sustainable institutions. Benevolent dictators – whether that's Tim Berners Lee, or Mastodon's Eugen Rochko – work well, but fail badly. No matter how benevolent a dictator is, they are not infallible or omniscient. A critical juncture in any good project is its transition from a dictatorship to a democracy – an individual to an institution.
Take the Archive of Contemporary Music, the largest archive of popular music in the world. It was founded in 1985 by Bob George, who had amassed a collection of 47,000 LPs in a loft he'd lived in since 1974:
https://www.theguardian.com/music/2023/nov/16/archive-of-contemporary-music-new-york
George and his co-founder, David Wheeler, have since grown the collection to 3m pieces of media with 90m songs. They were the first people to start seriously collecting and preserving music that others viewed as ephemeral and disposable. The collection wandered from place to place before settling in a Hudson Valley facility that it is about to outgrow.
In part that's because they're still one of the only places where others' collections can be reliably consigned. When Keith Richards wanted to turn his blues collection over to a facility for long-term preservation, he chose ARC. Now, ARC is working with the Internet Archive to digitize and make available its vast holdings.
But that's a fraught and contingent business, too. The Internet Archive has been targeted with one of those bowel-loosening record-industry lawsuits last seen during the Napster Wars, with Sony, Universal and others seeking damages that would permanently shutter the Archive and bankrupt its founder, the wonderful Brewster Kahle:
https://blog.archive.org/2023/08/14/internet-archive-responds-to-recording-industry-lawsuit-targeting-obsolete-media/
The suit argues that when a library makes 78RPM recordings available for its patrons to check out over the internet, they cannot avail themselves of the copyright exemptions that have been a feature since copyright's inception. Remember, libraries are an order of magnitude older than copyright! The core of this suit is that libraries cannot move into the digital world.
Rather than doing what libraries have done since (literal) time immemorial – collecting works, preserving them and making them available – digital libraries can only license time- and circulation-limited copies of works that can't be preserved. It's a grim vision of a future without libraries:
https://pluralistic.net/2022/11/13/they-want-to-kill-libraries/
Giant corporations are an existential threat to human thriving. After 40 years of neoliberalism, there's a growing recognition that the market's invisible hand would like to swat you like a bug. Hence the rise and rise of the labor movement. Though "union density" (the proportion of unionized workers) is still at an historically low ebb, union support among the public is higher than at any time since the New Deal.
That's why UAW president Shawn Fain is planning a general strike in 2028, calling on other unions "to align your contract expirations with our own" so that all the contracts come up for renegotiation at the same time:
https://inthesetimes.com/article/uaw-auto-workers-general-strike-contract-labor-unions
This is a very clever way to overcome America's ban on sympathy strikes, which was introduced in 1947 with the Taft-Hartley Act. Sympathy strikes – where all unionized workers refuse to provide any service to employers who won't bargain fairly with their own workforce – are a hugely powerful tool for labor movements. Look at Sweden, where Tesla has refused to bargain with the technicians who fix its cars.
In response, the entire Swedish workforce has united against Tesla. Dockworkers won't unload its cars at the port. Electricians won't fix its chargers. Cleaners won't clean Tesla showrooms:
https://www.wired.com/story/sweden-tesla-strike-cleaners/
This is how it's done. Musk has made his fortune by crushing worker power in every one of his businesses, joining the ranks of Apple and Amazon as one of the world's leading maimers and killers of his workforce:
https://www.usnews.com/news/top-news/articles/2023-11-18/us-lawmakers-urge-scrutiny-of-spacex-worker-injuries-after-reuters-report
While Musk's latest turn toward open antisemitism is grim, especially in light of his ownership of Twitter, it's perfectly in character for a man whose businesses have always been charnel houses of "crushed limbs, amputations, head injuries and death."
But Musk can't fire or even intimidate the dockworkers who won't unload his cars. Sympathy strikes enlist workers who are beyond the reach of intransigent employers in aid of workers who are subject to retaliation for striking. That's why Taft-Hartley abolished sympathy strikes.
But if all the major unions are negotiating their contracts in 2028 – as Fain has called for – they can all strike without falling afoul of Taft-Hartley. That's some shrewd tactics.
Even if you believe in markets as a force for increasing human thriving, it takes an act of will to miss how corporations who can exploit their customers or workers will. When it comes to exploitable customers, prisoners are the ultimate captive audience. Most of us are familiar with the horrors of private prisons – especially after the acute phase of the covid pandemic, when corporate prison managers simply left America's prisoners to die.
But prison privatization is fractal. You can privatize a prison facility, but you can also privatize the commissary, the library, the mail, even phone calls and visitations. Some of the slimiest prison profiteers are the ones providing telecoms facilities to prisons. These companies lobby to ban in-person visits and mail and then provide "free" phone service to state facilities – service that can cost prisoners and their families $10/minute.
One of the worst of these companies is ViaPath (formerly Global Tel*Link). Not only did they charge prisoners sky-high rates for contact with their families, they ran a wildly insecure service that breached the data of 600,000 users:
https://arstechnica.com/tech-policy/2023/11/prison-phone-company-leaked-600k-users-data-and-didnt-notify-them-ftc-says/
These prisoners and families had "sensitive personal information" exposed online in unencrypted form, and were not informed of the breach, according to an FTC complaint:
https://www.ftc.gov/system/files/ftc_gov/pdf/Complaint-GlobalTelLinkCorp.pdf
The company went on to defraud state and local prison systems whose contracts they were bidding on, by claiming to have never have suffered a breach.
The sleaze of the prison-tech system is the worst imaginable – which is about what you'd expect. After all, prison-tech is at the very foot of the shitty technology adoption curve:
https://pluralistic.net/2021/02/24/gwb-rumsfeld-monsters/#bossware
The prisoners who are abused by companies like Viapath are test subjects for technology that will work its way up the privilege gradient, moving on to mental patients, asylum seekers, kids, blue collar workers, white collar workers – then, everyone.
This makes prison-tech a great oracle for understanding what's coming for the rest of us in a decade or two. That's why I made prison-tech the McGuffin of The Bezzle, the sequel to my 2023 novel Red Team Blues, which comes out next February:
https://us.macmillan.com/books/9781250865878/thebezzle
High-tech forensic accountant Marty Hench is back in The Bezzle for a story of early-2000s internet consolidation, LA Sheriffs Department gangs, prison privatization, collateralized debt obligations, and the absolute depraved sleaze of prison-tech privateers. If you still have a Twitter account, you can enter this sweepstakes to get an early copy:
https://twitter.com/torbooks/status/1725544405879447745
(There will be other ways to get an early peek for non-Twitter users, rest assured!)
Attentive readers will note that The Bezzle will be my fourth book in 14 months. I'm presently touring my third book of 2023, The Lost Cause, a climate emergency book that Rebecca Solnit described as "a future woven from our successes (Green New Deal!), failures (climate chaos anyway), and unresolved conflicts (old MAGA dudes). I loved it":
https://us.macmillan.com/books/9781250865939/the-lost-cause
Book tours are exhausting and exhilarating. They have the weirdest social dynamic, where you're bouncing to a new city every day or two, having high-speed social contact with hundreds of people at a go, then hunkering down alone in a hotel room to do press calls and answer publicity emails. I've been doing this since 2006 or so, and one mystery I've pondered all that time is the weirdness of stinky hotel soap:
https://www.flickr.com/photos/doctorow/53339503041/
Go to any Marriott, any Hilton, a Comfort Inn or a Holiday Inn, and you will find yourself in the Kingdom of Beige. The wallpaper, art, carpets and bedspreads are all calculated to be as generic and invisible as possible. But the soap and shampoo stocked by these redoubts of nothingness are wildly perfumed. I'm not a big fan of floral perfume anyway, but the hand-soap in your typical hotel bathroom makes Axe Body Spray seem innocuous. No taxi air-freshener, no urinal puck, not even the most lethal of 1960s-era douches ever aspired to the eye-watering, clinging, scent of hotel soaps, shampoos, conditioners and hand-cream.
It's like hygiene perfume is the mid-priced hotelier's equivalent of 1980s Wall Street traders' suspenders: while everything else must be absolutely uniform and staid, this is the one realm where you can really let your freak flag fly. I'm always up for a unfettered freak-flag, but holy shit does this stuff stink.
I'll get a chance to ponder this anew on the tour for The Bezzle next February, and again for Picks and Shovels, the February 2025 Martin Hench novel that's already pending.
I need to get ready for my bookstore event, but before I sign off, one more bit of science fiction publishing news. An indie filmmaker in Paris is working with the brilliant John Varley on an adaptation of his sf classic Titan, and they're trying to raise $65k on Kickstarter to pay for it. I kicked in – a world with more Varley in it is a better world:
https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/superstory/themis-the-next-frontier
If you'd like an essay-formatted version of this post to read or share, here's a link to it on pluralistic.net, my surveillance-free, ad-free, tracker-free blog:
https://pluralistic.net/2023/11/18/collectanea/#bricabrac
Image: Famartin https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:2021-01-06_12_15_43_Cranberry_trail_mix_with_cranberries,_peanuts,_raisins,_walnuts,_almonds,_sunflower_seeds,_pepitas_in_the_Franklin_Farm_section_of_Oak_Hill,_Fairfax_County,_Virginia.jpg
CC BY-SA 4.0 https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/4.0/deed.en
#pluralistic#architecture#mcmansion hell#2008 crisis#mcmansions#general strike#labor#uaw#shawn fain#activity pub#standards#standarization#contingency#mastodon#fediverse#federation#sdos#w3c#privacy#signal#pay for privacy#themis#john varley#crowdfunding#kickstarter#archiving#music#archive of contemporary music#glam#preservation
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Question about the fear of demedicalization of plurality and your opinions on if it's a real concern or just used in fear mongering within syscourse.
I feel like like a good therapist isn't going to care if your system is real or not. They are only going to care if it's causing distress or if it is helping you.
So i'm a little confused and perhaps a little nieve on how endogenic systems are pushing towards demedicalization when the focus shouldn't be on if something is real or not, and is instead looking at how it affects you? If there is even a small number of people negatively affected, then it should still be a medical concern.
But, my opinions aside, I overall just want to know if there is legitimate concern over demedicalization, and if so, what are they, and how can people help to avert that risk without invalidating the lived experiences of endogenic systems?
As someone active in clinical circles, and with access to proper libraries,
This isn't something you need to worry about.
It was my biggest fear. I had so much anxiety around doctors being "duped" by this endogenic nonsense, and it pushed me back into my old circles to investigate.
This doesn't need a big long debunk of a response.
I promise you, doctors aren't being fooled, they're just as certain as I am that these are generally different concepts.
Obviously, there'll be people in the middle. I fucking HATE Schwartz, I don't like the way he compares CDDs and IFS. Thankfully, many other doctors feel the same way I do. It's not the same. And this is true for endogenic plurality, as well.
One of my big fears was that this would send us back into sociocognitive (fantasy) territory, but... nope. It's not happening. Instead, research has expanded to include more factors in the development of DID (biopsychosocial), without being able to account for all cases. It's recognized that the concepts only overlap in a small number of cases.
Another fear I had was that it would be brought back to transgender issues. In the general public, yes, but clinically, no! The discussion of plurality, sexuality, and gender identity are incredibly complex, it's ALWAYS been an issue for CDD systems, and the growth of endogenic systems has actually given the field a push in a very positive direction. Those who are scared to be denied transitioning, this is our ticket. We should want to support this.
In general, DID research continues on as normal. The trauma theory is only being further supported by the day, and endogenic plurality is blossoming into its own category.
I expect we'll also see a spike in specialists over the next few decades, thanks to all the limelight the topics are getting lately.
In therapy, the only change I'm seeing is a more... personal approach being used by therapists. They're a lot more willing to ask about how you identify and how you want to be referred to, what language you prefer. There's some who lean too far one way or the other, but that's always been true, back in the days of MPD-- think of the debate over final fusion vs healthy multiplicity in clinical settings.
The transition period is going to continue to be bumpy, with ideas clashing and overlapping, but I genuinely feel no fear anymore about it, and I believe it'll settle relatively quickly.
Many of the concerns are syscourse talking points that never get elaborated on. Endogenic systems are stealing language and resources, but they can't tell you what words were stolen (most of them weren't stolen) and the resource thing isn't something measurable. Endogenic systems typically don't want dissociative specialists.
Obviously, again, there are still going to be cases of truth-- one of my mods had a therapist that was a bit too plural friendly for their needs, and they had to do some educating to their therapist. I consider these cases to be part of the bumpy transition period. I acknowledge that they happen, but I recognize that it won't be long before everyone is much more educated. Their therapist will now be a much better resource for other CDD systems.
I hope this helps ❤️
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