#but I made myself do it and it was fun. it’s fun to be serious and excited about literature even to 8th graders!

[strawberrymoosetracks]

I read this as if it were in the modern day, and that the aforementioned God of War has taken on the modern form of someone who would be consitered the most powerful soldier, or the epitome of modern war. To me, the epitome of modern war is just a relatively fit guy who sits in a room with a PC. Heres my take on it, I didn't put much effort into this so sorry if it sucks :)

I've got to hand it to humans, they are great at making things efficient. Their innovation is beyond any other species I've encountered. One of their favorite things to make more efficient is war. Back in the old days, they trained young men, put them in armor, gave them a sword, and marched them thousands of miles for a fight against other young men who were similarly armed.

They started including horses, which sped up the transportation process. Then they came up with guns. A marvelous invention really. It made war much quicker, but it also forced armor to get better. As much as I liked the shiny armors, it was always too loud. It was nearly impossible to sneak anywhere, and seeing was a nightmare.

Nowadays, the most powerful warmonger is a guy at a desk. One may think that is crazy, but in all fairness, that guy has the ability to shoot a thousand suns at whoever they want to. I've had this job for eighty years, under three seperate faces.

I love efficiency...but the God of War gets bored when the people capeable of war are too scared to fight eachother. The Cold War ranks the lowest out of all the fun wars. Sooo, I look for fun in other ways. I started in the eighties when I could find someone who wasn't an anti-war hippie, but wasn't a complete jerk. That was when I realised my love language. I love physical touch. It's like my kryptonite. Maybe it's that it's been years since any soldier was willing to hug, especially in high war time. I had forgotten how great it felt to hug.

And now we get to the modern day, I have a girlfriend. She's super sweet, but sometimes she has some...interesting ideas. We get into conversations and find out that she has the strangest ideas. We go to the bar with friends and get into conversations about the romans, and as someone who was there, I have to set them straight. They always brush me off, saying that it can't be true. Maybe in my next iteration I can become a historian and set these lies straight. Anyways, we were at a bar with some other soldiers, and we were talking about Ares. That used to be my name, but I have been though too many lives since then.

"You think you can buy the loyalty of the God of War with something as small as affection? Don't be stupid." Leah said, taking a sip of her drink.

As the others seemed to agree, I just had to intervine. "As the aforementioned God of War, she's wrong you can absolutely do that. I'm basically a cat; pat my head and l'l be your loyal servant for... five minutes, give or take?"

The group was completely silent. They all stared at me, trying to work though it. Leah started laughing, "You're funny, Levi. You don't even get in real combat. Like come on." She slowly stoped laughing as my face continued to be serious. "You're not joking? You really think you're the God of War?"

"I don't think, I know." I said, staring into their blank faces, "Ok watch." I looked around the bar and eyed two guys who were friends. I pointed at them, and they immediately became enraged. They yelled at eachother, mostly nonsense. There was no real greivance, just some pent up anger I was using. One was about to swing when they suddenly stopped, sitting down and continued to talk as normal. I turned back to my drink and took a small sip.

I took a deep breath in and out, my shoulders dramatically rising and falling. It had been centuries since I told anyone I was the God of War. Since the romans went out, people stopped believing in pantheon gods. I would have shown the middevial europe my real self, but I had inconveniently been turned into a woman at that time. Calling myself a God was an easy way to get burnt at the stake, and getting out of that was too much work.

"No way..." My girlfriend muttered, staring at me.

I slowly turned to her, "Well, do I give loyalty for head pats?" She nodded slowly, her mouth agape.

My buddy next to her slowly leaned over and patted me on the head, "Please don't kill me."

I smirked, "Wasn't planning on it." I drank the rest of my drink and set it down, not really knowing how to start back up the conversation. It just became dead silent, everyone grapling with my revealed identity. Well I just ruined the night with this again, teaches me to never reveal myself with my close friends. So many centuries into this, and I apparently still have many things to learn.

—"You think you can buy the loyalty of the God of War with something as fickle as affection? Don't be foolish." —"As the aforementioned God of War, she's wrong. You can absolutely do that. I'm basically a cat; pat my head and I'll be your loyal servant for… five minutes, give or take?"

[hyperkitten224]

woah hey yo look at this drawing I stole out of Gangle's sketchbook (jk I drew it)

oh and a cute little crappy doodle as a bonus

[echo-riot]

Texting Sevika/Ellie/Abby

•|||——————————————————————|||•

You: So when I said I wanted you to take care of me, I didn’t mean in the “drag me across the floor by my hair” way…

Sevika: Quit whining. You look good all disheveled.

You: I bet I do, but I’m just saying, there’s a line between “care” and “torture”

Sevika: You’re lucky you’re cute. And lucky I’m in the mood for cuddles, not punishment.

You: Lucky for me. Or unlucky for you, depending on how much patience you have for me trying to escape this “care”

Sevika: Try escaping again. I dare you. You’ll end up back on my lap.

You: Oof, is that an offer? Because I’ll test it

Sevika: Test it, and I’ll remind you who’s in charge… And who gets to decide when the cuddles end.

You: Guess I’ll just have to test it out, then. Maybe I’ll need a little extra help getting back in your lap

Sevika: I can always make more room.

You: Glad to know you’re still obsessed with me.

Sevika: Obsession is an understatement.

You: I’ll take that as a compliment, sugar mama.

Sevika: It’s more of a warning, love. Don’t forget it.

•|||——————————————————————|||•

You:Hey, loser. You still breathing?

Ellie: Oh, I’m breathing, alright. But only because I need to stalk you in person later. What are you doing?

You: Just thinking about how lucky you are to have me as your girlfriend. You’re welcome, by the way.

Ellie: Oh yeah? You’re lucky I haven’t tied you up and kept you all to myself yet. But I’m patient, I guess.

You:Yeah, well, I’d let you, but I’d probably escape, and you’d be sad. Maybe that’s your fantasy, huh?

Ellie:You wouldn’t. You think you could escape from me? I’m the one with all the tricks, remember?

You: Oh, I remember. Your “tricks” are mostly you being a grumpy little brat, though.

Ellie: You love it. Don’t lie. You love when I’m all possessive and weird with you.

You: Yeah, I kinda do. You just can’t get enough of me, huh?

Ellie: Yeah, well, if you’d stop being so damn cute, maybe I wouldn’t have to. But here we are, me constantly obsessed with you and you pretending you don’t love it.

You:Who’s pretending? I know you’re a complete mess without me. I’m basically your lifeline now.

Ellie:And don’t you forget it. You’re stuck with me, loser.

You:I’m not complaining. You’re stuck with me, too. Hope you’re ready for me to ruin your life in all the best ways.

Ellie:Babe, my life was already ruined before you came along. You just made it a lot more fun.

You: Good, because I’m only getting started.

Ellie: Can’t wait to ruin you, too.

•|||——————————————————————|||•

You: Hey, muscle-head. Got any room for me in that oversized hoodie of yours?

Abby: You want me to share my hoodie? Really? You know I could just pick you up and carry you around instead, right?

You: Ooooh, are you trying to flex on me? I think I’d rather just crawl into your lap and make you squirm instead.

Abby: Squirm? Babe, I can take whatever you dish out. It’s you who should be worried about that, not me.

You: Keep talking like that and you might make me want to test that theory… but I’ll let you have your little victory for now.

Abby: Victory? Pfft, I don’t need to try. You’re already obsessed with me. I know how this ends.

You: Yeah, obsessed, huh? You wish. I’m just here for the murderous cuddles and your questionable muscle flexing.

Abby: You love it. You know damn well you can’t resist this. Don’t act like you don’t wanna be tangled up with me right now.

You: Who says I’m acting? I’ll happily let you “tangle” me up. But I’m definitely not going easy on you.

Abby: You don’t have to go easy on me. I like when you push back. But don’t think for a second I’m not gonna win.

You: I’m not worried. I kinda like a challenge. You won’t know what hit you.

Abby:Bring it on, babe. I’ve got all the time in the world to prove who’s really in charge here.

You:You can try, but just know that when I win, I’ll expect a serious cuddle session… no complaints allowed.

Abby:Fine. But you better be ready for when I win. I’m claiming all the cuddle rights first.

You: Deal. Just don’t be mad when you end up in my arms instead of the other way around.

Abby: We’ll see about that, babe. We’ll see.

•|||——————————————————————|||•

[robotrules]

Thoughts on Fallout: New Vegas from a First Time Player

A (very) long stream of consciousness about how much I like this game:

So I put off playing any Fallout game for the longest time. Had Fallout 3 and Fallout: NV just rotting in my Steam library for literally 15 years, mainly because when I tried playing F:NV when it first came out, it kept crashing and I just gave up. Fast forward to December 2024 and my Youtube algorithm kept on showing me all the stupid shit people did in the games and I was thoroughly amused by all of that, because I too enjoy playing a chaos creature whenever games allow me to. Read that F:NV was the most beloved in the franchise and had a lot of freedom when it came to game choices. Great! Had a western sci-fi theme, a concept I really liked. I love retrofuturism and Westerns and the great expanse of the American Southwest, all wrapped up in a post-apocalyptic setting. But then I stumbled on a video of this guy and I was immediately sold:

I was smitten by Yes Man's voice and sense of humor and goofy face (Dave Foley's vocal performance can't be overstated. He made Yes Man very charming!).

And then I learned that you could actually work with this goofy robot as an actual partner* to take over New Vegas and let me tell you, I COULDN'T CLICK THE INSTALL BUTTON ANY FASTER (pretty sure you could hear a sonic boom coming from my house). AND THE GAME RAN THIS TIME! And thus, I began my odyssey into the Mojave Wasteland.

* Most media robots tend to be cute little sidekicks or antagonistic villains or just dumb enemies, so it was pretty refreshing to actually be able to work alongside a robot/AI as an equal of sorts. My courier is pretty respectful of Yes Man, so I like to think they become friends and co-rulers of the strip. :) (Although I did kinda kill him a few times out of curiosity. He said he'd make it up to me after I killed him and it made me feel bad. ;_; Sorry bb. )

And my first impression of the game? I love it! I was kind of bracing myself for some edgy humor (Like Borderlands) and I was pleasantly surprised that it had a a right balance of silly, serious, and dark when it needed to be. The roleplaying aspect is fun and I like how you can basically be whoever you want to be (with some great comebacks from the courier. When killing Mr. House, you can say "Yes Man needs you out of the way" and I was like "Yup, this game knows exactly what my motivations are" >:) ). The quests never seem to be a slog to me since they're tied to characters and their stories, so the motivation to help (or sow discord) is the main thing that drives me to want to explore and do everything in the game.

Also, non-feral ghouls are so fucking cute. I love their raspy voices and they seem to be (for the most part) nice. I always had a soft spot for creatures that are "othered" like monsters and aliens, and I view ghouls as stand-ins for communities that were medically ostracized (like leprosy and the Hibakusha), so yeah, very easy for me to like them. Also Raul is my absolute favorite, so there's that too. :) I like all the companions tbh. As fantastic as a world as the Fallout universe is, I like how grounded everyone is, just as real as anybody you'd meet out on the streets. And that they all have their own hopes and dreams that aren't centered around the player character. Raul is my favorite just because I love how he tells his story and Danny Trejo's voice is like a glass of warm milk to me (very soothing).

Oh! And obviously I love the robots too. I appreciate that robots seem to vary on their level of sentience (Protectrons vs. Mr. House's personal Securitrons) and the writers treated Victor and Yes Man with just as much care as they did their human characters (I wish Victor had a bigger role though! What a cutie-pie). I find it kind of poetic that it's a robot that saves your life and it's a robot that helps you make major decisions in-game (if you decide to go the Yes Man route). The Courier owes their life to Victor and Yes Man and has their life changed completely because of those two.

And of course I had to make Primm Slim sheriff (that cowboy getup and his little Yee-haw is too precious :') ). Basically, if I don't have to kill them, I am doing my run as a pro-robot and pro-mutant run. I love them too much.

Anyways, there ends my thoughts. I'm not finished yet (currently eliminating the side fractions for Yes Man. Bye-bye Brotherhood. :) ), but I'm looking forward to getting back in the game once I have more time. I think it might be my favorite game!

[seokminfilm]

like the movies | lee seokmin

🪄 pairing, lee seokmin x reader

🪄 warnings, non-idol au, fluff, established relationship, kissing, physical intimacy (holding hands), pet names (seokmin calls reader 'baby', reader uses seokmin's nicknames), dorky seokmin, reader teases seokmin a few times, seokmin soft hours

🪄 summary, in which lee seokmin (your sweetheart of a boyfriend) surprises you with a weekday dinner date (cringy pick up lines and tipsy seokmin ensue).

🪄 author's note, requested by my favorite cutie's g @realmofclouds!! honestly you are so so real for stumbling upon these pictures & falling in love w him all over again 🤍 these pictures were used in one of my first fics to go viral "boyfriend shaped" so this is bringing back memories for me too LMAO anyways enjoy sweetheart boyfriend seokmin 🙈⭐

🪄 now playing, like the movies, laufey & where or when, laufey

The mood of the authentic Korean restaurant brings a smile to your face as you enter, and you follow your boyfriend to your table, sliding into your seat with ease as Seokmin pulls your chair out for you and takes your coat from your arms (being the gentleman he is).

"I seriously can't believe you actually did this," You say, gesturing to the interior of the restaurant as you glance down at the bouquet of flowers Seokmin had surprised you with when he came to get you from work.

"Of course I did! You've been working hard this week, even if you haven't really wanted to. You deserve a nice bowl of fishcakes and tteokbokki." Seokmin smiles, voice light as you laugh into your hand.

"I was going on a diet," You say with a frown. Seokmin sighs, taking your hand and gently patting the top of it with his other hand. His smile is warm, nearly sending heat waves to you as he juts his lips out in a silly pout.

"A cheat day is made for events like this, you know," Seokmin says matter-of-factly, finger in the air as he pushes his frames farther up on his nose. Laughing at his over-the-top antics, you sigh, nodding and giving up your reservations as you sigh, admiring your boyfriend.

"No one can ever be sad when you're around, Seok." You smile softly, and Seokmin giggles in return, cheeks puffing up in a cute smirk as he pulls away from you, accepting his drink from the waiter. You take yours in a similar fashion, quickly ordering your favorite dish before handing the menu away and sipping on your water.

"So, how was your day, baby?" Seokmin's voice is soft, his dark brown eyes on you as he awaits your response.

"It was okay, just kind of boring. Spent my whole day editing outlines and grammar-checking emails. It's like I'm their human Grammarly or something," You scoff dryly, string your drink with your straw as Seokmin studies you, hand resting under his chin as he listens intently.

"And that mean coworker I was telling you about last night? " You start, and Seokmin interrupts you, finishing the name before you can get it out. "Yeonje, right?"

"Yeah, her─" You pause, sighing as you rub the lines forming on your forehead from creasing your eyebrows. "She threatened to hack into my work email and delete all my contacts." You sigh, and Seokmin frowns, obviously not very happy with your information.

"Who would even threaten something like that?" Seokmin questions, and you shrug, a smile appearing on your face despite the craziness of the situation.

"I don't know, but she said it with a force too. It was kind of funny," You lighten up the mood, and Seokmin smiles, shaking his head as reaches his hand across the table again, taking your hand and caressing your knuckles with his slender fingers as he sighs.

"As long as you think it's funny, baby. If it gets too bad though, call me, and I'll deal with it myself." Seokmin's tone is serious, and you blush, imagining your sweet boyfriend storming into your workplace and giving the manager (and Yeonje, hopefully) a piece of his mind.

"I'll remember, Min, I promise. Plus, it'd be fun to see what you'd do." Smiling even wider at the thought of Seokmin threatening to throw hands, you start to laugh, face turning red with your giggles.

Seokmin doesn't know what's funny, yet he's laughing with you seconds later just because of how cute your laugh is to him, and you sigh after a few seconds, level-headed enough to ask him why he's laughing.

"Because you're laughing, baby! ...Your laugh is funny." Seokmin sighs through his words, sides probably hurting from how hard you two were giggling (you swore you saw an elderly couple glaring at you two).

"Aww, not as funny as yours." You say, reaching your hand over the table to pinch Seokmin's cheek. As much as he hates when people do that, he lets you do it with ease, resorting to squinting and blushing as you coo at him.

"What are you going to do though, seriously?" You question after a few seconds of silence, mainly filled by you and Seokmin sipping on more of your drinks to recharge after your giggling session.

"Do about what?" Seokmin questions innocently, cheeks puffed with a dazzling smile on his face as he leans in and waits for your reply. Sighing at how cute he looks, you push his face away from yours lightly, causing Seokmin to let out a laugh as you giggle.

"If I do call you to the company one day. Are you going to politely berate them or something?" You question, and Seokmin smiles into his hand, looking to the side quickly before meeting your eyes again. The table goes quiet for a few split seconds, and you can see the gears turning in Seokmin's brain as he tries to think about how he would do that

"How would I "politely berate" someone?" He repeats in disbelief, and you let out a spurt of laughter, head hitting the wooden table as Seokmin's forearm automatically flies out to soften your blow.

"Just be polite like how you usually are. Like this: "You should please stop making my girlfriend's work day harder. Pretty please? I mean, I'd appreciate it, for real!"" You tease, and shake your head moments later, watching how Seokmin's smile grows up at your impression of him.

"You think so lowly of me, don't you?" Seokmin questions, voice warm through his smile as you laugh, shaking your head as you kiss his lean hand.

"I'm just teasing, Seokkie. You know how much I adore you." You smile sweetly, lips curving into a smile as Seokmin leans in, pecking your lips softly with his as he sighs.

"Not as much as I adore you, though." Seokmin combats, and you sigh, letting him win the argument as you shrug. "I'm not going to try and fight you on that, Seokmin."

The laughter that spills from Seokmin's lips sounds like heaven on earth, and you silently thank whatever higher power exists for bringing Seokmin into your life. You'd have surprise dinners like these with him a hundred times over if all that it meant was that you'd get to have Seokmin by your side.

[tkdb-hell]

may I ask for tigh riding Sho if im not too late plz

100 Follower Spicy Special • 3 of 7

100 Followers Post and Masterlist

♡ MINORS DO NOT INTERACT ♡

Scenario #13 - thigh riding

The common room was empty, the lights dimmed to a soft glow. The evening had started innocently enough—a quiet moment alone, tucked away from the chaos of the day. Sho leaned back against the couch, arms draped lazily over the top, his usual smirk playing at his lips as you leaned into him.

What began as a casual kiss quickly deepened, your fingers tangling in his hair as you pulled him closer. Sho responded in kind, lips moving against yours with an urgency that made your head spin. His hands found your waist, holding you steady as you shifted, straddling his lap.

For a while, it was just the two of you—kissing, touching, completely caught up in each other. But then you started to move, subtly at first, rolling your hips in a slow rhythm against his thigh. Sho didn’t notice at first, too focused on the way your lips tasted, the way your fingers tugged gently at his hair.

It wasn’t until you pressed down a little harder, your breath hitching as the friction sent a jolt of heat through you, that Sho finally realized something was different. He broke the kiss, his brows furrowing slightly as he glanced down. His hands tightened instinctively on your waist, holding you in place as he tried to process the sudden slick warmth soaking through the fabric of his uniform trousers.

“Wait…” His voice was rough, edged with confusion and something darker as the realization dawned on him. “Are you—”

You didn’t give him a chance to finish, capturing his lips in another heated kiss. His grip faltered for a moment, his usual composure slipping as you rocked against him again, the moisture on his thigh impossible to ignore now.

Sho groaned low in his throat, the sound vibrating through your chest. “You’re seriously—” He broke off, his breath hitching as your hips rolled again, sending another wave of warmth through the thin barrier of his clothes.

“You weren’t paying attention,” you murmured against his lips, a teasing edge to your voice. “So I helped myself.”

Sho’s eyes darkened, his hands tightening on your waist as he guided your movements, the teasing smirk he always wore replaced by something far more serious. “You’re unbelievable,” he muttered, words filled with raw desire.

“You know you're into it,” you whispered, your voice breathy as you rocked against him harder, the friction and heat building with each passing second.

Sho’s hands slipped beneath your shirt, his fingers gripping your bare skin as he pulled you closer. “You’re making a mess,” he said, his voice low and strained, though the slight tremor in his tone betrayed just how much he was enjoying it.

“Then you’d better do something about it,” you challenged, a playful glint in your eyes as you pressed down again, dragging a groan from deep in his chest.

Sho didn’t need any more encouragement. His hands gripped your waist firmly, setting a rhythm that left you breathless, the heat between you overwhelming. The feeling of his thigh pressed against you, combined with the intensity of his gaze, sent you spiraling closer to the edge.

Every brush of fabric against your sensitive skin, every quiet gasp that escaped your lips, only drove Sho further. His usually smug expression was gone, replaced by something raw and unfiltered as he watched you come undone on his lap.

“Someone's definitely going to catch us,” he muttered, his voice rough and uneven, though there was a hint of admiration in his tone.

You leaned in for another kiss, your movements slowing as the tension in your body finally broke, leaving you trembling in his arms.

Sho held you close, his breathing ragged as he tried to catch his breath. “Next time, give me a warning,” he said, his voice laced with both amusement and frustration.

“But where’s the fun in that?” you teased, brushing a strand of hair from his face.

Sho huffed a laugh, shaking his head as he tightened his grip on your waist. “You’re lucky you’re cute.”

“And you’re lucky I didn’t wait for you to figure it out,” you shot back, earning another low chuckle from him.

Sho leaned back, pulling you with him, his hands never leaving your waist. “Next time, I’m in charge,” he murmured, the promise of more to come lingering in the air between you.

[beatcroc]

what kind of frivolity would you engage in, mecha?

<

---

[i-like-forcefem]

Hiya

I'm a guy. I've always been into being humiliated and stuff like that,,, I really like being condescended, tricked and taken down a peg (despite not being... up many pegs). Recently I've been questioning my gender,,, but I think I'm probably a guy. Genuinely, I think. Despite wanting to be a girl. Maybe, idk. Idek what gender really is, and yeah, the first time I ever learnt to jack off was pretending to be a girl, but hey, that's just something sexual, and if it's tied into the humiliation, which sexually it has been even if- look okay maybe, MAYBE, I'm a massive fucking egg, but I really do genuinely- look. Whatever the case I'm a massive idiot who by all means should be activating the hell out of whatever predator instincts you have, so please, just have fun with some fantasy of what you'd with an idiot like me

"I'm a guy, despite wanting to be a girl" Do you see the contradiction there cutie? Listen try being a girl for a little while, give it a honest shot! For the next week don't entertain the thought you're a guy anymore, because you're not, starting now you're a pretty little girl!

And at the end of next week you can reflect on whether you liked being a girl, if not, no harm done! And if you did, well you can keep being a cutie however long you want!!!

[suffarustuffaru]

i need to share my very horrible idea to combine the reinhard/julius/otto/subaru boy drama into one julius-centric fic

ok so a little while ago ive made all kinds of ottojuli and reinjuli posts and while i havent finished all my major julisuba posts Yet i am quite fond of julisuba also and i think itd be incredibly funny if you just dumped all of these ships into one story. just go ALL IN on that boy drama!!!! go big or go home amirite!!!! the worlds WORST love trapezoid youve ever seen!!!!

this post is just me rambling fic ideas bc i sadly dont have time for Every Fic Idea and also i just. i just think itd be funny putting multiple ships with the same person in them into one fic. on a serious level its like mimicking real life relationships where sometimes people come and go and you have different dynamics with each person!! on another level i just think this is also very funny so!! here we go. under the cut:

anyway so my idea for this is that you know, julius of course meets reinhard when hes ten and reinhard is eight and then it alters julius's brain chemistry. at first he's in complete awe of reinhard. and then over time the shame starts setting in. that julius isnt as strong as reinhard. and the jealousy sets in a bit too, so julius's got this chip in his shoulder trying to carry his family's legacy and trying to carry the weight of knighthood to be as perfect as possible. to be as close to reinhard as he can. they meet again in their teens and julius shows reinhard the ropes of like basic knight stuff bc reinhard just joined the knights. and of course reinjuli become friends but julius has spent his whole life quietly watching reinhard from afar and now julius still has that distance with reinhard even as theyre supposedly friends now. reinhard is a God, you know? his powers and his leash from the kingdom and his family keep him distant and the two of them are ignoring that. classic homoerotic "do i want him or want to be him" friendship where both of you are too scared to get any closer for various reasons with a Twist (reinhard's very real monster complex that keeps getting validated bc Everyone Around Him thinks hes a monster).

anyway but then julius remembers that you know, shit between reinhard and him wont work out for many reasons, like reinhards family deciding to torment julius at various points in his life (heinkel, whos julius's boss, and reid, who went from julius's childhood idol to. you know.), and also reinhard needs to have kids because hes the sword saint, and also homophobia exists in rezero. and also even if those werent all obstacles julius still has his Complexes connected to reinhard and they got that distance between them so. no go. (repression gets in the way of relationships :((( )

also quick side note is that ex 4 happens and julius reinhard ferris go to vollachia and julius interrupts a meeting with vincent vollachia himself to go "I UNDERSTOOD THAT LITERARY REFERENCE YOU JUST MADE. THATS A REALLY GOOD REFERENCE I LIKED IT A LOT" bc hes a massive nerd and ig this is slightly-more-of-a-disaster-gay julius au so julius is like ............................. vincent was kinda cool for that.

AND THEN SUBARU CRASHES INTO JULIUS'S LIFE and julius is like seeing this guy who's also got a chip in his shoulder and then he insults the knights and says the knights are all depending on their dads (nepotism) and julius is like .......the chip in my shoulder was bad enough and also youre kinda like me fr. and you are clearly a fucking misguided kid so now i have to save your ass. i cant NOT save your ass. and reinhards like "julius and subaru nooo you dont have to do this :((((" and julius cant admit atm that hes also doing this to save subarus life so julius is just like "he disrespected the knights >:(((("

but yes we all know what happened there. julius saves subarus life. julius has to slice subarus throat in that one failed loop. they become friends across several timelines. they also homoerotically share souls, you know, typical bromance things, rivals to lovers except subarus the one going YOURE MY RIVAL and julius is like he is SUCH an upstart. hes really grown on me like a fungus but thats the appeal. and julius i think sees subaru as like a kindred spirit (or at least thats how i interpret julisuba) except subaru is like way more freer than julius is. same desire to prove yourself but subarus not restraining himself constantly like julius. its sometimes to the point of recklessness and general stupidity and what have you, but his boldness and bravery and determination and heart really is admirable.........................

yeah so anyway julius falls for ANOTHER guy again, you know how it is sometimes. the heart wants what it wants and julius is cursed to always have the worst meetings with his closest friends. and of course julius gets heartbroken bc wtf i have to kill my new friend :((( noo!!!! but in the finished loop its like. oh subaru...... hes really improved himself. hes grown so much already. hes kind of. inspirational really. idk how he does it. except subarus you know got that Mystery to him the same way reinhard does (theyre traumatized and Cant Take About It Normally so they just randomly lore drop what they can) and also subarus SUPER into emilia. and julius is like .................... well. subarus taken. haha. and reinhards. taken. fuck me. fuck. and like somethings going on with subaru and rem and emilia right. fuck. and subarus got his whole toxic masculinity / gender crisis..... and he doesnt know hes Bisexual yet...... man. what a loss for julius amirite haha.

and also subarus busy after arc 3........... and julius has no idea whats happening there but that seems Real serious :(( and julius's got other things to attend to so he hopes subaru reaches out to him eventually..... or that they cross paths again since subarus in the emilia camp and julius is in ana camp (and of course reinhard is in felt camp and like that was a whole debacle bc wtf. reinhard, u do know thatd be a big deal to our mutual friend felix?). so. julius pines from afar ONCE AGAIN HAHA.

(also of course subarus still attracted to reinhard here. its um. well julisuba can bond now over pining over reinhard but thats for later also!!)

anyway of course during arc 3 julius briefly runs into some gray haired merchant twink thats being dragged around by subaru bc ana camp rescued this guy from a cave somewhere??? and this new guy and subaru made a deal or whatever so he was just helping out in the background of the fight against sloth??

and whaddya know................ julius goes to drink at a bar bc you know he probably tastes wine for fun in his free time (hes definitely Fond of wine anyway iirc) and now hes Sad over the Ones That Got Away so. bar it is. and gray haired merchant twink is there!! no way. they start talking a bit casually while drinking you know and julius's taste is Unfortunately either the graceful ones (anastasia, because julius has great taste in women) or the cringe fail ones (all the twinks - except for felix - that julius keeps having the wildest first meetings with, because julius has slightly shit taste in men) so julius is like huh this otto guys kinda funny lol. endearing in a weird way!! and -

oops they both end up being a little. they make a little bit of a move on each other. bc they were drinking and got a Bit tipsy. ottos Also not over the one that got away (subaru) (again) and hey. the finest knight truly is. Fine. objectively fine. totally. so you know. things get a little out of hand, maybe they do a bit of cringe fail flirting hidden underneath five million layers of repression and the Horrors of Being Known but ultimately they both embarrass themselves somehow (read: how far they went with each other while under the influence is up to you) and agree to Never Speak of This Again bc oopsies they were both technically each other's first time being Straightforwardly Not Straight with another man. oops. anyway julius has to go back to his camp and otto fucking bolts but he bolts right into subaru and gets his ass dragged into sanctuary drama.

julius is totally not a little bit envious about that.................... about otto getting to accompany subaru to sanctuary... but dont worry julius!! youll get to make up for it later!! bc eventually arc 5 stuff happens. and julius is Glad to see reinhard and subaru again. even with all the Baggage. and subaru is of course Weird about julius but eventually subaru reassures julius after they both confide in each other about the astrea drama (theyre honorary astreas via being dragged into the astrea family mess). and subarus reassuring to julius in a whole new way okay. subaru, whos unrestrained and incapable of being on the down low about anything, and julius, whos always holding himself back with a gazillion layers of repression, starts learning to let go a bit...

but also juliotto meet again. its terribly awkward and they both agreed to never speak of their awkward encounters again. subaru is going ??? and reinhard is clueless. otto then also goes to save reinhard and felt from heinkel trying to take felt hostage, which was also terribly awkward but reinhard and felt are grateful about it (but lbr if reinhard and otto knew each other deeper reinhard would maybe be a little. Apprehensive. around otto while otto would be sympathetic with reinhard bc hes like male emilia). but then while otto manages not to get erased by gluttony....... julius gets erased. of course. which you know results in being forgotten by reinhard in julius's THIRD first meeting ever with reinhard. and subarus the only one who remembers him of course.

then arc 6 happens :,))))) and julius of course has to confront his ideas of knighthood, his identity, his self esteem, and who he is outside of His Name. and also julius gets his ass beat by reid. his childhood idol. who reinhard KNEW was a shitty person but never ever told julius (whether this is because reinhard wanted to spare julius's hero worship or because reinhard never got the chance to tell julius is hard to say lajdsf). but julius does get to triumphantly win in the end!! grow as a person!!! learn to undo a bit of that repression and not hold himself to impossible standards all the time!! hes growing still!!! hes finally solidified his friendships with people like subaru and emilia!! hes remaking his relationship with anastasia!! hes asserted himself, hes planning on going to meet reinhard again one day and duel him!! things are looking up even if its still bittersweet that he doesnt have his name back yet!! does this mean?? perhaps?? a HAPPY ENDING?? julius can have the two men (reinhard and subaru) he admires the most in his life?????? as friends???? or as boyfriends?????? slowburn mutual pining????????????????????????????????????????

and then comes. arc 8 otto. that piece of shit.

julius is very much someone who has to grapple with the weight of the expectations that people throw at him. and also reinhard is someone who May envy julius a bit, but there's also you know, joshua and subaru with the Explicit Envy and (past) resentment because theyre placing heavy expectations on julius!! theyre pointing blame at julius!! julius is trying to find himself outside of stuff like that, especially after arc 6, but he's still got stuff to work on you know? he still has duties to fulfill!! loyalty that he has to act on bc hes gotta help subaru and co in arc 8!! and then in comes otto.

otto is also someone with expectation placed on him, but its Different. ottos mostly a nobody and when hes Not a nobody, his reputation tends to be Derogatory. hes a menace. hes a bad luck charm. hes grappling with the fact that he has to keep being left behind - post-arc 5 bc he was injured, but also repeatedly during arcs 7 and 8 because hes too physically weak to be on the same playing field as emilia or garfiel or subaru on the battlefield. he feels Useless after placing his identity on the expectation that hes Dependable and Useful.

julius is a bit more on even ground with otto now that julius is. also mostly a nobody bc his name is still gone. and also julius had to deal with having that part of his identity crushed. julius tried to be useful over and over in arc 6 only to get his ass repeatedly curb stomped by reid in the beginning. he was a nobody. he wasnt dependable anymore. and also otto is that one guy he had a Passing Fling with over having The Ones Who Got Away and julius was still vaguely hopeful about maybe being pals at least but ottos brushed him off a bit since arc 5. theyre like each others secrets you know? and now otto doesnt know that shit - julius is the only one who Knows - and otto also hates julius's fucking guts now. over SUBARU. and julius has been through this whole rodeo clown circus with arc 3 subaru so this is an absolutely terrible ride through memory lane.

and this is julius's THIRD twink that hates him for terribly unfair reasons. julius is very tired and a bit heartbroken in this au trying to pretend it doesnt bother him. on one level it doesnt. bc ottos pathetic and clearly Overcompensating for Something. on another level it kinda does bc julius had a Thing going with otto. and otto is the complete opposite of julius. like hes different from the other guys julius has liked.

julisuba is about complimentary opposites - they appear Extremely Different at first glance but theyre very similar. theyre people who try to look and act bigger than they are, people who keep reaching to be The Best, to be Perfect, because theyre overcompensating. theyre worried their entire identity is only built off of trying to be bigger than the shadow that other people in their lives (like their families) cast. but they cant reach perfection. and julius is like subaru but if subaru tried to really make himself "refined" - if he tried to stop putting his heart on his sleeve all the time. reinsuba are very similar too. theyre very refined knights who try to keep themselves in check at all times while the weight of the world is on their shoulders. they cant have a hair out of place. except julius is like the "smaller" version of reinhard. julius is less powerful. its like comparing a human and a "god" - reinhard, whos untouchable. but its a double edged sword, because julius gets to be a normal person, because half the expectation placed on him is also purely from himself, while reinhard isnt. reinhard isnt Free. hes on a leash by the kingdom and his family. julius even gets his kind of "celebrity" status stolen from him via the loss of his name. hes truly kind of Normal now - julius is like if reinhard didnt have his crazy abilities and had a little more of a chance to be free.

otto? yeah otto is. very very far from all of that. hes so obviously imperfect that most of his reputation, when its brought up, is just him being known as a mess who's caused various forms of chaos everywhere he goes. either that or hes just. There. Invisible. very very average. and otto is someone who wants a nice comfortable life, someone who wants to fit in - julius and subaru arent Exactly like that, and while reinhard also wants to be normal, ottos the one who has more of an opportunity. but he doesnt. because otto Dooms Himself by being recklessly cutthroat. otto is like if subaru was just. More of an asshole, so ottojuli would just be a rather Extreme Challenge for julius to have to deal with HAH. and normally otto is someone who repays how people treat him - a very "you treat me like this, i'll treat you the same way in turn" kind of deal, except ottos developed a vendetta against julius and its basically like if subaru never let go of his arc 3 julius vendetta.

yes so anyway. etc etc stuff probably happens but i ran out of ideas lajdlfjasdf i just think combining ALL the boy drama and recontextualizing + adding to canon would be. batshit crazy. and terribly entertaining. im so sorry julius but i want to see you crack a bit under the pressure. reinjuli as a ship is like tragic gay yearning that never goes anywhere past being friends with quiet homoerotic tension, then julisuba is. you know. extreme rivals to lovers, starts out Rough but then ends up being super super sweet and theyre Trying their best underneath the self esteem issues. and then ottojuli is. toxic yaoi at its finest (pun intended). you get Every flavor of mlm possible!!

ok so you may be asking "ok what would you even name this fic then" and to that i say that this would be called To All the Boys I've Loved Before.

anyway i really wanna write this idea someday ill inform you guys (if youre reading this and are Interested) if it ever happens :< so. in conclusion this is just julius the entire time throughout all of these events:

[anxiously-sidequesting]

My recent take has inspired me to make a list of Wizard101's most fuckable spells. I will regret this when I'm elderly.

[skitskatdacat63]

Boy King Seb :D

[july-19th-club]

ok dean's do as i say not as i do ass in the cassie episode when sam realizes that not ONLY is his supposed playboy brother actually a guy who will drop everything and reveal The Secret to the first girl who spends more than a month with him but . he will reveal The Secret at all, a thing he's spent the past six months loudly saying there is never any use in doing because we can't keep friends in this life anyway

[maddy-ferguson]

talking to new people again is making me realize that (this is gonna sound dramatic) i haven't lived in five years but what i have done is watch a lot of movies and read a bunch of books and believe it or not that actually makes me an interesting conversationalist in some ways (?)

[sanjarka]

when i was younger this whole ''no romantic or sexual experience" thing made me feel deeply unlovable and it still does but in a different way. now i've somehow convinced myself that i'm not supposed to desire anyone like that. like it's not meant for me. it's me who can't love now. not other people.

[giantkillerjack]

I miss my shitty sisters so much. I am feeling the family trauma sharp and harsh today. I woke up from a long anxiety dream again. One of the ones where I'm eternally just trying to get a ride home, and my family just can't seem to give me that. There's always one more thing before I can be allowed to go home. My wife is never in these dreams for long because then she'd help me and the dream would no longer be about family anxiety.

This time, I had fallen asleep in real life with my CPAP machine mask on, so the dream was less severe and not about how I couldn't breathe. In fact, I even had nice moments with my family in this dream. Me and my sisters - especially my older sister who was horribly ableist and emotionally abusive to me - seemed to make up. She didn't apologize or anything, but in the dream, I gave in and invited her to hang out with me. And in a way, it was nice. We watched TV together again like we used to. All three of us. Like in some of my very happiest memories of home.

I think that's why waking up felt so painful to me. Because that comfort was ripped away and replaced with the reality that if I invited my sisters and I to have that again, then there is nothing to stop the same pattern of abuse from occurring for the hundredth time. I would become too depressed to eat, then I would become anemic and suicidal again. I refuse to be that hungry every again on their account. I have this eating disorder because of my sister's abuse, and I will not open myself up to undoing all my hard work on my partial recovery just because I miss her.

But gods, I miss her. I miss my little sister too. I miss having a family that feels whole. I miss my old house which is now sold and never to be the place of comfort it was again. I miss feeling like everything was okay between us.

But everything was never truly okay. So much of the extreme conflict we had was from me developing boundaries against bad treatment for the first time in my life. Of refusing to be treated in the ways they had always treated me.

I gave my big sister dozens of second chances, and she blew through all of them with the absolute confidence of a person who believes they will never stop receiving chances. I warned her that there was a limit, I told the rest of the family how much it hurt that they kept insisting I repair the relationship no matter how it affected me - no matter if it had me begging forgiveness for how I reacted to being abused. So much demand to apologize for making space for myself to be away from them so I could be safe or for - gods forbid - shouting about how their ableism endangered the lives of me and my wife. Shouting! How utterly evil to yell when one's life is threatened! Better to bear it with a smile and agree that actually you ARE just dramatic, right??? 🙄

I realized that there simply was no upper limit to the amount of emotional and ableist abuse I could receive from her, from my parents, or from my younger sister that would not result in the other members of the family insisting it is my responsibility to make myself available to repair the relationship. The wholeness of the family unit was more important than the wholeness of me.

So even if I miss them, even if I am sad how sad they are missing me, how sad my parents are that I won't speak to them, even though I still truly love them... I have an inner child inside of me that I will NOT allow them to make hungry and hurt and guilty and confused again! I deserve so much better than how they've treated me! My wife and my friends have proven that!

I am allowed to have grief and boundaries simultaneously. What I grieve is not my choice to make distance - I do not regret this decision, as it is the reason I have been slowly able to get healthier rather than sicker these past 2 years - I grieve that I was treated so poorly that I had no choice but to cut them off.

I grieve it truly and deeply and even in my sleep. I wailed in my bed this morning from the crushing weight of the waves of grief. I let them wash over me. And I let myself feel them. I survive, still breathing, and I continue to sail somewhere new.

[fappellmoan]

i won’t apologize for being a hater. seeing comments on chappell roans posts about being too hypersexual and needing to dial it down (mmm dial what down. say it very explicitly to me. what is making you uncomfortable in your own very clear words) and directly contrasting it with renee rapp just made me not like that girl even more i’m sorry! maybe she should try not being an annoying blonde bi girl who only seems to hang out with other blonde bi girls making mediocre pop. whoops