#but I feel like shes someone who wouldn't go for someone whos not “emotionally vulnerable” enough to fuck her way into bossing them around

[bitchthefuck1]

Still thinking about this by the way

[dogswest]

My hot take for today: I hate melvik. I think it goes against everything Viktor stands for which is creating to help people. While Mel just thinks of whats good for *her* city and the image. Viktor knows what ppl like her are doing for the undercity and its nothing. aint no way Viktor sees her more than just a "colleague" when shes part of the problem. Not to mention shes basically fucking Jayce for money— yk; the one guy who genuinely looks at Viktor eye to eye. If I saw my friend / situationship getting pegged because hes dumb socially but a genius mechanically, I'd be pissed. At least thats how I read it

/ntsrs /imo /readtags (no hate to anyone cuz its not hurting anyone, I just personally hate the concept)

[watcherintheweyr]

'Rhaenyra is a bad mom bc she knowingly gave birth to bastards and she knew how much danger they'd be in!!!!'

1. She had no way of knowing those babies wouldn't pop out looking exactly like her, beforehand. And unfortunately she couldn't stop at Jace. The throne needed an heir. Driftmark needed an heir. And a spare was needed as well, given the sheer rate of Targaryen children dying untimely deaths.

2. She had to provide heirs to the throne, and to Driftmark. If she hadn't, society wouldn't have blamed Laenor, they would have blamed her- which makes her position even more unstable, bc then she 'can't fulfill a woman's duty' so why would men think her 'able' to fill a 'man's role' by ruling the kingdom? And she and Laenor tried. He was either unable (meaning infertile or impotent, or unable to get it up), or unwilling. (And they did try. We dont know what they tried but Rhaenyra is shown to be clever in the show so honestly i have no doubt she attempted what Margaery suggested with Renly.) Laenor was in on the entire thing. He was aware of every part of this. He wasn't duped, he wasn't cuckholded- it was a plan greenlit by him, bc this way he and Rhaenyra would both have their heirs and a family. This cannot in any way shape or form be compared to Cersei cuckholding Robert (fuck Robert Baratheon tho), seeing as Robert was **not** at all aware that his children weren't his, and wouldn't have been OK with that.

Either way- she chose not to maritally r*pe her husband and put him through more trauma after it was clear their attempts weren't working. Yall are always so upset for Alicent (rightfully so, bc show!alicent was maritally raped, even if it wasn't considered as such in that time), but you... WANT Rhaenyra to do that to Laenor? Hello???

[And no. Rhaenyra did NOT rape or coerce Criston Cole. The actors, writers, and directors have all stated their sex was consensual and 'an act of love.' It was Rhaenyra going to someone she felt close to and trusted after feeling abandoned and unwanted and betrayed. In that scene you literally watch, as after Cole tells Rhaenyra to stop undressing herself, she moves aside so she isn't blocking his way to the door. The director states that the moment they show Cole folding and setting down his cloak was him choosing his desire over his oaths. And Criston Cole has known Rhaenyra since she was 14. He knew damn well the sort of person she was- and she was not the person who would have harmed him for saying no. She was an intoxicated and emotionally vulnerable 19 year old- Criston was in his late 20s to early 30s. And it's explicitly stated in ep.9 that the ONLY person a Kingsguard cannot refuse is the king. In ep.7 Criston disobeys a direct order from Alicent when she wants him to mutilate Lucerys. Criston Cole was not assaulted. Stop trying to assign Aegon's sins to Rhaenyra so that you can feel better for supporting him.]

3. In the books, the rumors of their bastardry at large halted when all of Rhaenyra's boys' cradle eggs hatched. The ONLY people who continued to try and raise issue were the core green faction. But the realm at large *did not give a fuck* why? Because every actually relevant party claimed those boys. Repeatedly and without flinching. Laenor claimed and loved those boys even face to face with Alicent's bullshit. Corlys claimed and love those boys- he was proud of them, and it's been stated by the actor in the show that Luke was his favorite- that given the... events of ep.10, Corlys will be out for blood. And Viserys repeatedly insisted upon their legitimacy- because Laenor and Corlys claimed them, because he knew that by forcing Rhaenyra to marry Laenor in order to repair the damage his insults caused House Velaryon, that he had backed her into a corner.

Rhaenyras boys are remembered to history as Velaryon. Even **Green supporters** noted that they were good, capable, intelligent, and **worthy** princes. That their deaths were unfortunate *for the realm.*

Legally, those boys are legitimate. They cannot be proven illegitimate without Laenor renouncing them, and he never did. Furthermore, trying to declare children illegitimate due to their appearance is a stupid, dangerous precedent. The fact that it's people who have no ties to House Velaryon pushing these rumors and pushing for disinheritance makes it even worse, because they're meddling in the succession of a House that *is not theirs.* if that became a standard, imagine the feuds and conflicts that would erupt- lords pushing for the children of rivals to be declared illegitimate all for the sake of trying to grasp and steal land, power, and influence as a norm? The realm would tear itself apart. Not to mention the sheer danger that would place women in, in Westeros.

Furthermore, even whilst usurping her, even while calling her children bastards, the Greens also imply Laenor's homosexuality was inherited by the Velaryon princes- that they would use Rhaenyra's 'promiscuity' and Laenor's 'predilections' to turn the Red Keep into a brothel- ironic, considering that's more what Aegon would've done. So even while claiming that Rhaenyras children are bastards that shouldn't inherit, they try to state that what the boys inherit or learn from Laenor makes them unfit for the throne. They can't keep their own damn story straight- because their usurpation was never about what is moral, what is right, or the greater good. It was about greed. Power. Sexism.

It doesn't matter what those boys looked like, especially seeing as Rhaenys had dark hair in the books. What matters is that Corlys and Laenor and Viserys claimed them and declared them legitimate, and that they **never** deviated from that.

As for Vaemond, he was a second son. And he waited until Corlys and Viserys were dying and too ill to stop him to make a grasp for power. Youre not supposed to look at that and feel hes in the right. Youre supposed to look at that and see a man consumed by greed, and literally trying to bury Corlys' will and intentions before the man is even in a grave. He was NEVER Corlys' heir- he just wanted power. It wasn't about his House, or their legacy, it was about him.

(And before yall start shit about Rhaenyras boys stealing Laena's girls' inheritance... Rhaena and Baela are *TARGARYEN*. Not Velaryon. Their claim was to the throne or to any holdings in Daemon's name. NOT to Driftmark.)

Rhaenyras boys being betrothed to Rhaena and Baela tied up any issue of 'Velaryon blood.' Baela would have been queen consort of the seven kingdoms at Jace's side, and they very clearly adored one another in book and show. Rhaena would have been Lady of the Tides- which she never would have had a chance for, without Rhaenyra (and Laena) making those betrothals. She and Luke were also canonically very close- and in show she's very encouraging of him whenever he looks nervous or uncertain. They had a bond.

Rhaenyra stole nothing. She gave those girls more. And she loved them- they were the only daughters she got to have, seeing as the Greens treachery caused the early death of baby Visenya. If she hadn't loved them, she wouldn't have trusted Rhaena to look after Joffrey or give her Morning's egg from Syrax. She wouldn't have immediately invited both girls to the table when she was queen, which is something her father did not do for her until much, much later. He allowed Rhaenyra's voice to be silenced too often when she was first made heir. Rhaenyra did not repeat that hurt to her girls or her boys.

Anyways, moving on.

You lot do also remember that Rhaenyra herself has Velaryon blood, right? Jaehaerys I's mother was Alyssa Velaryon. Aegon, Rhaenys, and Visenya the Conquerors' mother was Valaena Velaryon. It's not immediate, but there *is* Velaryon blood through *all* of Rhaenyras boys.

Ultimately, Rhaenyras boys were only in danger because of the core Green faction usurping the throne. If they hadnt- no succession crisis or rebellion could have truly threatened Rhaenyras boys- because none of them would have had dragons. All of Rhaenyras children loved one another- her sons by Daemon would not have turned on her sons with Laenor (and Harwin). They were a true, loving family- possibly one of the healthiest and most close knit one House Targaryen ever boasted.

And another thing... 'her having babies with Harwin was stupid, she should have picked someone Valyrian!'

Here's the thing. Rhaenyra had to be careful as hell choosing who would father her and Laenor's heirs. She had to choose someone who was physically close, and who could be trusted. Someone who wouldn't try to publicly claim those boys in boast or jealousy. Someone who would keep their mouth shut and had no ambition of their own in regards to the throne. Do you really think Vaemond Velaryon (as I see him suggested a lot) would've kept his mouth shut? That he wouldn't have tried to use this to blackmail Rhaenyra and Laenor for more power and status? Do you think Rhaenys would have ever fought for or supported Rhaenyra if Rhaenyra had tried to have Corlys sire her children? And flying to see Daemon in Pentos and having a purely Valyrian child 9 months later would have made things look even more suspect.

Furthermore... she chose someone who cared for her deeply. Who clearly had a positive relationship with Laenor. She chose someone so she wouldn't have to traumatize herself- she took power over her body in a way almost no Westerosi woman has ever been able to. They were a family unit- Rhaenyra, Laenor, and Harwin. Those children were loved and cherished by two fathers and their mother. They were raised never doubting their mothers love, nor their father's- either father. They were raised and educated to be true, good princes of the realm.

Rhaenyra fought like hell for her children. She was an incredible mother. Yall just believe everything the Green faction says without looking at it critically, and that's unfortunate as hell.

[kenjakusbraincum]

Not a request but i just wanted to share the daydreams Your sukuna fics have inspired like a clueless sourcer tries to take his pet away and sukuna let's it happen as a test of loyalty. Like he knows that this servant is suspicious. And of course being very loyal as soon as she realizes and tells sukuna that they tried to get her to leave, clinging to him, begging him to let her stay beside him 😭

He wouldn't intentionally want to test you, but now that he saw the opportunity... Where's the harm? You'll never know. Besides, he knows you wouldn't leave. He does, but hearing it from your mouth is not the same as actually seeing you make a decision to stay when faced with a choice to leave.

That servant is bold to think he doesn't know. Even bolder to believe running away is possible at all, much less with you. Okay, if it was one servant, maybe he wouldn't notice. But you? He sleeps with you almost every night. He wakes, almost in panic, when you do as little as shuffle or make a noise in your sleep. He would know you're gone.

But you are not as aware of this as he is. It starts with the little things. The servant talks to you as she washes your hair. Usually, she complains about her work, and you let her. You miss talking to people other than Sukuna, even if they're bothersome. Until one day, when she asks you what he's like when he's with you. You smirk, not immediately thinking why. Sukuna hasn't exactly trained you to be a critical thinker, on the contrary, he's dumbed you down quite a bit, to his liking. But you do still think, at least a little bit. Would he like you sharing details of your intimacy with him to others? No, hell no! You think he might just kill you. You think this is the worst way you could possibly betray him. After all, he trusts you with that vulnerability. So you tell her he treats you like he treats all of his servants. Obviously, with a little bonus of allowing you in his bed.

On another occasion, she mentions running away. Now you're conflicted. You're confident enough in your relationship with Sukuna that you know he wouldn't kill you for failing to refer that information to him. He knows of your good nature, so fundamentally different from his. He usually doesn't hold it against you. So you don't tell him, but it weighs heavy on your conscience every time you're with him. It's not the obligation, it's just that hiding things from him feels wrong. You're so used to telling him everything, all the time. Now you feel complicit. And he notices.

The situation reaches it's peak when you have a particularly bad day with Sukuna. It truly takes so little for him to hurt you, a single word is enough, much less a string of words as demeaning as the ones he spat at you that day. You cry in your room, and the servant, that vile servant! She really tried to convince you to leave now, when you're as emotionally vulnerable as you can be! She says so many things that don't ring true. That you don't deserve this, that you can be free and worry about your own needs and not someone elses...

She doesn't understand that Sukuna doesn't treat you badly. On the contrary, most of the time he treats you like royalty. And on the other hand, she doesn't understand that you wouldn't know what to do if you leave Sukuna. You're useless. Any life and survival skills you've had are long gone now that you've spent years being pampered by him every day. You're good for basically nothing, other than indulging in your little hobbies and serving, pleasuring, loving him. You would have to work, but most importantly you would be alone. Who could ever provide you with such a carefree life in the outside world? No, you don't want anyone to provide you with that life! You have it here. You don't want to leave. And every second you spend there listening to her says otherwise.

You tell her no, and when she starts insisting, you start to get up. And then she keeps going, she's following you, and you're begging her to stop because if she doesn't you'll have to tell him. And she doesn't, and now you're in tears and running from her, and barging into Sukuna's throne room unexcused. He is busy with his usual daily dose of slaughter, and he's doused in blood. But it doesn't matter because its him, and you feel safer in his arms than you would feel tucked away at the end of the world. Even if his embrace smears you in blood, and engulfs you in the scent of death.

Sukuna is usually weary of being interrupted, but he notices you're panicked, crying, and babbling nonsense. On and on about how you don't want to leave him, how you beg him to forgive you, for not having told him earlier, for not having seen it earlier. You never want to leave him, because you're the happiest when you're by his side. And then he gets it. He gets what he wanted. He picks you up so you can bury your face in his shoulder and calm down. He's not mad. ''Who upset you, my little pet?'', he asks in his softest voice, reserved only for you. ''And how shall we punish them?''

[beifong-brainrot]

Tlok is so weird about abuse, particularly when their female charcters are abusive towards their male characters.

Like Eska's abuse by Bolin was played completely for comedy. Despite him being shown as clearly uncomfortable, and crying on multiple occasions.

This is especially upsetting because Bolin has been shown as being a rather vulnerable individual with trouble setting healthy boundaries and an aversion to saying 'no'. But even when he does actively express his discomfort and attempts to end the relationship, his autonomy is violated and he is literally forcefully engaged to Eska. And we are supposed to laugh.

He is shown to be so traumatised by the experience that he still actively panics when shown even a picture of Eska and is clearly very hurt that Mako didn't offer him more help in the situation. Which is honestly understandable.

Speaking of which, Mako and Korra's relationship in B2 was... troubled to say the least. Now, Korra had a lot on her plate and was rightfully stressed by the events happening. However, it seemed that she often took her stress out on Mako, getting into arguments with him and yelling at him.

She kicked his fucking desk across the room. While Mako may have upset her by going behind her back and ratting her out to Raiko, but this is no way to react. But we are supposed to be annoyed and angry with Mako, and we are meant to see Korra reacting so violently as justified. [While I don't like Mako's actions in B2 he didn't deserve this.]

This is not helped in the slightest after Lin enters the scene, and comments on thw mess, saying that he 'got off easy'. And she implies that she committed even more property damage after Tenzin broke up with her.

Ah, Lin. I think while Korra and Eska's actions toward Mako and Bolin have been called out sometimes, we tend to overlook how fucking horrifying what we're told about Lin's reaction to Tenzin breaking up with her is.

Because, if we think about this for a little, this is a scary situation. Lin is a very strong and physical person who has been shown to be quick to violence. Air Temple Island is Tenzin's home, and the home of multiple Air Acolytes, full of fragile artifacts that we are shown that he values tremendously and for which he feels personally responsible for.

Ans it's honestly hard to believe that Lin didn't know this about Tenzin, since they persumably have known each other for a while. I wouldn't be terribly surprised if she damaged the temple because she knew it would hurt him.

And it's understandable that this wasn't presented as a very morally wrong thing to do, since the 'crazy ex girlfriend' isn't an unpopular trope in comedy, but it is damaging. Since it plays women doing genuinely scary and upsetting things towards men for comedy, therefore making it more difficult to take such behaviour seriously.

But hey, I guess we can kinda pretend that Lin most likely damaging Air Temple Island with earthbending is comparable to egging someone's house or keying their car. So let's let that slide.

Oh yeah, she also abused her position as chief of police in order to try and get rid of a romantic rival.

Which is extremely fucked up, especially with how Lin presents herself as extremely professional and serious about her job, yet she apparently used it to terrorise a woman for 'stealing' her partner. What kind of bunny boiler shit is this.

And all of these scenes presenting Lin as a vengeful, borderline abusive ex to Tenzin are presented as comedic, further driving tlok's most likely unintentional message of normalising female on male abuse. It's not as in your face as Eska's abuse of Bolin, to the point that without the context of Eska and Korra's behaviour, I wouldn't really point Lin out, but with this context, you can't help but consider it.

Once is by chance. Twice is a coincidence. Three times is a pattern.

And I hate to make this argument, but if the genders were reversed in these situations?

If a boy were pressuring a young, emotionally vulnerable girl into marriage, treating her as his slave, manhandling her, getting angry when she speaks to a male friend?

If a young man were to scream at his girlfriend multiple times and go so far as to throw her desk across a room?

If a male policeman implied he caused severe property damage at his ex girlfriend's house after she broke up with him and if he tried to use his status to arrest her new partner? (you know, actually 40% of cops are- *gets shot*)

I feel like we'd have a completely different perspective.

While male on female abuse is still often stigmatised and overlooked, I still think that Eska, Korra and Lin's actions would be scrutinised more closely and reacted to more negatively if they were men. Concurrently, I think we would treat Bolin, Mako and Tenzin with more leniency and gave them more of the benefit of the doubt had they been women.

I want to think that this wasn't a message that was presented on purpose, but it's still one of my least favourite aspects of tlok and I genuinely dislike the part of the fandom that trivialises these actions by Korra, Lin and Eska.

[dronebiscuitbat]

Oil is Thicker Then Blood (Part 69)

It seemed like the moment Tera got her fangs she became obsessed with using them.

It had been multiple weeks of wrangling her to let things go, to not utterly destroy every blanket, pillow, toy, or random chunks of metal she found. She was like a puppy, using her fangs as an extra hand to feel out the world with her mouth.

Both Uzi's and N's hands were covered in tiny bite marks, Tera would never truly try to bite either of them, but that didn't mean she didn't nibble and knaw at their hands whenever she got the chance, like love bites, only slightly more painful.

It didn't help that Uzi's mood was already on an extremely short emotional fuse. She was constantly tired, her back ached and she was utterly sick of getting sick. More was coming out of her then she was putting in, and yet she was still gaining weight.

Month two of her pregnancy was looking to be a worse rehash of month one, where she was decidedly less worried and emotionally vulnerable and much more pissed beyond measure.

V was also sticking around more.

It was weird.

They lived side by side, so they'd always seen quite a bit of her, even if it was only passing conversation as they went to and from wherever they were going. But now V was inviting herself over. Offering to help with Tera, or asking if she needed oil, or something to eat, or just… being considerate.

Uzi wasn't sure what exactly was going on with her. But V also refused to take no for an answer. So… she was just hanging around, mostly dozing off on the couch or lazily playing with Tera, who's favorite game was now ‘tug of war’.

“Are you gonna tell me why you suddenly want to be here? Or are you just going to keep me guessing?” Uzi finally asked after the third day that week V had miraculously gotten into the apartment without her knowledge.

“Nope.” V hummed back, the ‘p’ popping as she went back to playing with the newly energized solver kit, tugging on a rope toy made for dogs.

Despite V's normal antagonistic behavior, her presence was actually incredibly… welcome.

Taking care of Tera, doing the household chores. And trying to decipher what the hell was up with Doll, before had been no problem. Was starting to get a little difficult, in part because of Tera's new penchant for destruction, but her core felt heavy and sluggish, stuttering as it used quite a bit of power to combine her and N's code together. Her core was even lighter now, becoming a light shade of lavender instead of a deep violet.

And having someone around to help, even if Uzi couldn't decipher the reason why, was not something she was going to complain about.

At this very moment though, she was washing bottles in preparation to refill them, while also replacing the rubber caps, as now they were full of bite marks and rips.

“Sooo where do you get the oil?” V asked, for the first time genuine curiosity in her voice. And Uzi didn't even turn around to answer as she scrubbed the inside of another bottle.

“Uh… the nursery?”

“No. Not the oil you drink, the oil she drinks. N was saying something about her oil needing to be filtered or, whatever.”

“Me?”

“… Do you like… prick yourself?”

“What? No. I have a side pannel that opens�� did you not know?” Now Uzi turned to look at her, finding her holding Tera up in the air with one hand, away from the rope toy.

“No. Why should I know? I didn't pay too much attention to who I was killing.” V always had the tone like she didn't care or wasn't interested, but it really wasn't fooling Uzi anymore, if V truly wasn't interested, she wouldn't have asked.

“Yup. Every worker drone has a side panel, has a oil port, a charge port, everything we need to take care of kids. N doesn't have one, we checked. So you probably don't either.” She explained, thankful that it's the last time she'd have to explain this.

“Huh.”

Then there was silence again, Uzi trying to get a particularly stubborn stain off a bottle and going to town at it, growling slightly as if that would help scare it away.

When her head suddenly felt like lead.

She leaned over the sink as the feeling of extreme dizziness washed over her, her core skipping beats as her vison went blurry and her hearing faded into muffled sounds.

She dropped the bottle and it clattered against the floor, bouncing away on the tile. And gripped the side of the sink, feeling herself becoming unsteady as her legs wobbled and her stomach turned exactly once.

Then she began to fall to the side, unable to keep her balance, vison blinking out, bracing to hit the hard floor with what little withering control she had over her body.

Only she never did, something had caught her halfway down, cradling her gently and purring softly, she almost thought it was N, with how gentle they were, but he wouldn't be home for a couple more hours.

When her head stopped spinning and her core went back to its normal tempo, the first thing she felt was the plush texture of the couch, not the cold tile of the floor. And the feeling of a warm hand on her forehead.

And when her eyelights opened, she realized it was V. Holding her head to check her temperature.

What. The Fuck.

“V?”

“Oh good, you're fine.” She immediately removed her hand, but still hovering over her as V looked down at her, looking as blasé as ever.

“Why are you being so nice?”

“Why are you complaining?” V quipped back, putting a hand in her hip as Uzi sat up, and shook the lead from her head.

Uzi sighed, grumbling as she truly, honestly, did not have the energy to argue with V over her weirdness, but she guessed she shouldn't complain, as he had just been saved from hitting the floor.

“Oh whatever, thanks for catching me… I guess.” Uzi went to get back up, but V pushed her back into the couch with a decent amount of force, dropping Tera into Uzi's lap before walking over to the sink herself.

“Mmmhm.” Was all V said, before beginning to finish cleaning out the bottles herself.

With another long-suffering, confused sigh, Uzi took V's previous position of playing tug of war with Tera, letting V do whatever the hell she wanted.

Next->

[itsybitsylemonsqueezy]

You know what, fuck it: Baldur's Gate 3 Thoughts.

(The world is so so bad right now, can't even name all the bad things, so fuck it, no more bad feels, just some nice garbage right now)

I really love that the big 3 pairings all kinda arrive together:

Lae'zel and Shadowheart are already trapped on the ship together, like they are both trapped by their beliefs. They both know more about what's happening than anyone else and are also perhaps the most frightened.

Astarion and Gale show up stuck and as potential bait. They're both concealing some pretty big problems. The only way to succeed with them is to trust them despite this. And they both badly need to bond with others so they can survive their ordeals.

Karlach and Wyll actually already have a relationship, just one founded on misunderstanding. They can each empathize with each other in ways the others can't and adjust quickly to thinking of a previous adversary as a friend. They both have so much going on that when they arrive on the Sword Coast, they just resettle into business as usual. They've both been misused by those with control over them and seek to break that control, even if that doesn't fix everything, even if it means more loss.

They're all good ships, I love them. And all the other combos are good too, there are no bad options here, but I'm a bit of a sucker for these. Honestly, really appreciate having an entire party of bisexuals. I love that so much <3

Gale and I are the same person ha ha ha FUCK

I do have fic ideas, potentially for Gale & Astarion and Lae'zel & Shadowheart (spoilers below)

Like, I actually have a lot of feelings about Shadowheart being a complete dick to Lae'zel while she goes through a crisis of faith, only to eat pigeon pie later when she gets a crisis of her own.

And I'm obsessed with the idea of Lae'zel learning how to be comforting as she watches Shadowheart crumble apart, as she loses all sense of identity. Because at least Lae'zel has that. Lae'zel lost a lot in parting from Vlaakith, but she didn't lose who she was. Indeed, she left in defense of who she was, in defense of what she knew to be right. Shadowheart doesn't even have that. And it's a wild thing that comes over you, to feel like you've fucked up and lost and to find someone you can actually help. I think it would be a really cool and beautiful thing to see, Lae'zel helping Shadowheart find the pieces of herself. That would just be really, really good.

And then there's Problematic Old Man Yaoi over here

Maybe what I love best about Gale and Astarion is how much fucking WOULD NOT solve it

Like, some people just need to fuck it out and then it's all good, you fixed the issue

And 100% fucking would not solve their shit. Like, it would help, or it certainly wouldn't not help. But it'd only help like... max 20% The rest has to be solved by Talking, Using Your Words, Talking To Other People No Not The Imaginary Conversations, and Admitting When You're Wrong.

I also love that this is true no matter where you think they get together.

Like, let's take Act I: I cannot IMAGINE how Astarion could talk Gale into bed that early. Gale "Never Nude" Dekarios who's never had a crush on anyone who wasn't Mystra. He'd be shaking and fumbling just trying to ask Astarion on a date. And Mr. Emotionally Available over here, who is not ready to be vulnerable in any sense, who uses sex as a crutch because it's so familiar and so easy to dissociate from... yikes, what a combo. Poor Gale would be sent reeling by the hot-cold of it, he'd act insane those first few days after sex as he tries to make sense of how Astarion said yes to everything, but didn't mean it, but also he did? So should he pursue that or leave it be? Is the best choice to let Astarion thaw in his own good time or obsessively work on cracking this because Astarion clearly needs help and just doesn't want to ask for it? Stupid question, OBVIOUSLY the second! I... instant explosion. God, it would go so bad. Honestly, the good version is Gale resists the invitations and instead Astarion sulks for a few days over his blue balls or just fucks someone else, thus giving Gale a new case of mixed signals to obsess over. Jesus, we're just never going to escape that are we? Wizards gotta fixate.

Act II: In which Astarion chooses to ignore his own problems by instead arguing with Gale about his. Not because he's invested, merely because Gale is clearly being an idiot. Gale at first demurs, refusing to be argued out of his guilt, but then when Astarion becomes more insistent, counters with why Astarion cares so much? This would inevitably erupt in some kind of sexual encounter, but the fighting wouldn't stop because despite getting laid, Gale is still sure he's right and Astarion is still sure he's right. Dick actually can't solve this today. The camp mournful of ever finding a solution, they would like to sleep peacefully again someday.

Act III: Make or break time. Both Gale and Astarion escalate as the threat of death or destruction looms ever nearer. Gale now just as dead set on stopping Astarion from destroying himself as Astarion is on stopping Gale from destroying himself. Same threat, very different outcomes. Gale keeps looking at him with those damn puppy eyes and whining about "he'll regret it instantly" and "hate who he becomes" and "I can't stand to see that happen to you" or whatever. Obnoxious. And Astarion keeps trying to convince him that Mystra was wrong, that she "manipulated and groomed" him and "didn't even give an explanation" which he's owed, or some such nonsense. As if an inhuman, all-powerful goddess was out of line for being afraid of mortal actions... wait, was that a logical inconsistency? Damn. I think Gale would convince Astarion first. I think deep down Astarion would hate to be a full vampire too much, I think they both know it, and when Gale promises to stand by him, to take care of him, to always protect him... As much as Astarion doesn't want to trust, knows he's a fool for trusting, he agrees. He won't do it. He won't take the power. Because, damn him, he believes Gale. And what would suck is Gale would go "Cool! I'mma become a god, I can protect you way better then!" like entirely missing the point. And Astarion would be galled, deservedly so, by the hypocrisy. But Gale's so caught up in how sure he's right and how sure he's wrong, he's not even listening. I think it'd piss Astarion off so much, he'd convince the whole camp to kidnap Gale so he can't go sacrifice himself, full "He won't get the chance to kill himself because I'll do it first!" Until we finally get to the Nether Brain and... Astarion lets him go. Because that's the point. Trust isn't real if there isn't a choice. And as much as he hates the fact that Gale might choose what he doesn't want, he has to let him do it on his own. And I think that'd finally break through. That simple act of trust and sacrifice and playing willing to lose would finally make Gale go "Oh... oh god, what was I thinking? This isn't right." The fact that Astarion loves him more for the flawed and fallible person he is than for the heartless god he could become... That would finally make Gale see, Mystra was wrong all along and she never loved you because she can't really love. Not like that. Yeah. That's a personal favorite of mine.

But there's also a lot to be said for post-end, Astarion with nowhere to go and Gale going "You know... I've heard of spells that allow creatures form the Underdark to safely experience sunlight. We could try some of those, I don't see why they shouldn't work on you." and Astarion being floored and not even having the words for everything he feels at that offer. And then the raw sexual tension of living in his tower together as "friends" as Astarion mercilessly pines and Gale blissfully carries on, unaware until Tara finally goes "That's it! I can't take it any more! I'm going to live with your mother until you two sort this out!" and flies off. Leaving Gale to go "Huh... wonder what she meant by that?" Meanwhile, Astarion can hardly stand to be in the same room with Gale because he ends up basically drooling and yet, he can hardly stay away, staring obsessively from the shadows, creeping around wherever he is, looking exactly like the jealous lover he longs to be. Also, Astarion and Gale's mother! Oh, I can't wait! Too funny!

Oh, tower days with Astarion would be so good as he tries to adjust to having a life again. A slow, painful process, but very deserved. He'd need an occupation, he can't have nothing to do. Maybe he can look into magistrating again?

Anyway, there's some thoughts. I haven't finished Act III yet, but I'm close so I guess careful with those Act III spoilers.

Also, for anyone still reading, if you want to do me a solid: There exists somewhere a Bloodweave fic where Astarion walks in on Gale with a construct of himself only there's a twist... and the author is Very Correct about this twist. if you know, you know. But I can't find this fic anywhere! Please help a girl out if you've read the one I'm thinking of.

[paintbrushnebula]

I got a 💡 about the supposed Gwen Stacy Variant we've been told will be plot integral to Beyond the Spider-Verse

Now Idk if I'd actually want this to happen, but wouldn't it be insane if during BTSV, at some point during the Spider-Band's journey across dimensions to bring Miles home, they stop by a certain dimension where a Gwen Stacy Variant is living and at least knows a Spider-Man.

The Gwen Variant is bright and optimistic and knows who she is and what she wants out of life. She has set goals and aspirations! She's a planner! She has big dreams!

Then Spider Gwen becomes acquainted with her to some degree, confiding in her a little too much in an emotionally vulnerable time. This Gwen Variant (not sure how this will happen) somehow is made aware of the fate of the Gwen Stacys who aren't Spider-People. I imagine Gwen would vent about all that's making her scared or her emotional baggage, and we see how her being the Gwen who lives but loses others is making her afraid of the future.

So when the Gwen Variant hears that her role in the story is to die, she wants to escape her fate.

Gwen Variant is young, bright, has DREAMS. She won't die a supporting character in someone else's story. She deserves her own story! She wants to live her life!

So like, now idk HOW she'd do this, but what if she managed to incapacitate Spider Gwen (or maybe knock her unconscious?), take her Spider Suit, her watch, shaves off half her hair to imitate Spider Gwen's, and leave her to take her place in her universe to suffer the canon event?

So now, Gwen Variant takes Spider Gwen's place, playing the part (or trying to) so that the Spider Band doesn't suspect anything. Sure, she has a watch now, but she needs the other spiders to believe she's their Gwen so that they don't, well, take her watch and throw her back in her dimension and get their own Gwen back.

Now imagine where this could go.

Our Gwen is trapped in this dimension with two hopes: either that her friends find out they've got the wrong Gwen, or she somehow finds a way to escape this dimension without a watch before she glitches to death.

And the Gwen Variant has to keep up appearances. And one of the most crucial parts of doing that is with Miles. Imagine how she'll have to step into Gwen's shoes, resume her place in the middle of things being so very tense with Miles? How she'll have to fix things as an objective observer with no skin in the game?!

It could be interesting, because we'd see how this Gwen is different from our Gwen. More outgoing. Mor3 optimistic. More open. She isn't a mystery, she opens up and says how she feels.

Hnnnng wait I got another idea 💡

So imagine before the switch happens, while Spider Gwen is venting about everything to Gwen Variant, she opens up about how things have gotten between her and Miles. So Gwen Variant tries to be supportive! She asks her, what would she do or say to make things right with Miles? Then, Spider Gwen answers this by getting really candid, starts saying all these precious words she wishes she could just say, out-loud, to his face, little romantic gestures she'd do, but she's nervous, afraid to take the leap.

So now, Gwen Variant, knowing the full story of what went down between Spider Gwen and Miles, as well as all of Spider Gwen's, ehem. Romantic ideas, has everything she needs to make things right with Miles and thus keep up appearances.

And it ends up working REALLY well with Miles, because this Gwen is much more extraverted, we'll find out. It's almost too much. Too different, what happened to his Gwen?

Imagine when Miles becomes confused? How he'll wrestle with wanting to believe that this new and exciting Gwen who openly says all the things he's been waiting to hear from her is really his Gwen, but knowing deep inside that she's not?

So the plan is all falling into place for the Gwen Variant. When the chance shows itself and Miles and the other Spider Band members aren't looking, she will run off on her own and be a free spirit across the multiverse! Free from the shackles of her universe. Free from canon, free from death!

I don't know if this is what I'd want to happen, but I think it'd be a very interesting direction.

[backjustforberena]

i will join you in your corlys thoughts!

the scene in the last ep reminded me of the scene when laena died, though there was no arguing, it was them both trying to make the other see things from their pov, and when it got hard, corlys pulled away, yet again.

which has always been his way.

corlys loves rhaenys, there’s no doubt about that - it’s clear in the way he looks at her, in the way he speaks to her - but it seems he is a bit self-absorbed in the sense that he can’t be there for her when he’s shaken. how can you be someone’s rock when the ground you’re one is shaken? and obviously he can’t be vulnerable with her. he must carry his house on his back. and if he can’t, he might as well be dead, according to the deleted scripts from 1x10.

i think that scene is the most vulnerable that we have seen corlys be, and it’s by no choice of his own - he’s physically weak, injured, and still he tries to make her laugh. still he tries to comfort her by telling her all the things he thinks she’s been wanting to hear. and when rhaenys sheds a tear, his face, you see him look concerned, can basically hear the “oh shit, oh no, how do i fix this!?”

I think one of the very things that attracted rhaenys to corlys (according to the actress at least) - his masculinity, his macho-ness, his the very thing that is pretty detrimental to their relationship.

(sorry for rambling in your ask box!)

YOU CAN RAMBLE IN MY INBOX AT ANY TIME. Because I think you're right.

I don't think Corlys pulls away because things are hard. Bear with me. I think he's absolutely fine when things get hard because if that weren't the case then they wouldn't be such a unit. It would be a fatal flaw in their relationship if whenever things got hard, he just shut down or ran away. If there are external forces threatening them, then he's in it. If there are people who are messing with them or she needs him to be there by her side, then he will, provided he isn't compromised himself. And we do have examples and instances and a general vibe of them being able to have very difficult conversations with each other and being able to argue fairly and come to a settlement.

However, as I alluded to, these are able to happen when he isn't compromised himself. When they can both come at it as pillars of strength, as robust in their own opinion, when it's fire meeting fire, if you like. The biggest example of that is, as you say, 1x07, and alongside 2x03, they both end with Corlys letting go of Rhaenys's hand when she wants him to stay. It's easy to say that both are also conversations concerning succession, but I think it's more to do with mortality, legacy and, something else important to me, Corlys's emotional vulnerabilities. In both cases, he's wounded emotionally. In 1x07, Rhaenys artfully and bluntly deconstructs his heroic notions and his illusions about the boys and his motivations. In 2x03, the circumstances are far less dramatic but he's facing mounting pressure to step up but also to move on: pick a new heir, come to the council meetings, the Queen needs you etc etc. For all he professes not to be an invalid, I think there's a lot to be said by the fact that he feels he needs to point that out. But he's not processed everything, he's still grieving, he can't shut it away, he doesn't want to consider these things.

But both those episode conversation end in Corlys being shaken. Of him not having the answer, not wanting the answer, not wanting to hurt his wife. "History does not remember blood, it remembers names" and "Then we must hope to…see our way forward, in time. [...] Then… it is well that I am a good sailor" are, I'm sorry to say, absolutely flipping insubstantial things to say. They don't MEAN anything except 'I don't want to talk about it, here is a sticking plaster" because he doesn't know what to do! Does he truly believe blood doesn't matter? Or does he hope and pray that it's true because that's the path they are on? Does he truly think his skills will let him survive this war? Or that they'll have the rational discussion about it all later? Or is he just trying to make her smile and not worry for a second because that's all he can offer her?

He's doing what he can. And he's self-aware. The last thing he wants to do his hurt his wife. It's like he has a physical reaction to her pain. He hates it. And it hurts him when he can't ease it, especially if that's linked up to his own failings or simply he's just not feeling able to. Steve said in press for S1 that Corlys doesn't forget about Rhaenys being passed over and that it looked like he cares more than she does. That can be applied to all of this. He cares that she's hurt. He FEELS her hurt.

To me, two things make him unstuck: one is when his wife is hurting, and the other is when he doesn't know what to do. And when those two combine, so that his wife is hurting and he doesn't know what to do (usually specifically to address that hurt), then it's lethal.

At the moment, he does do so much. He is happy to see her, he spends time with her, he's holding her, loving her, listening to her, they're having sex, they're comforting one another, they're connecting. But what she is asking, however indirectly, from him... He can't do. Because those conversations are going to hurt him and he can't take that pain on. He can't risk failing. He can't risk hurting her. He wants to have those talks. He knows he'll have to. But just a bit longer... if Rhaenys holds on a little longer then he'll be that man again.

I also think that seeing Rhaenys being vulnerable scares him and shocks him. As it is two ways: she's his rock. He's not just hers. So if she's feeling the loss of him... He's also feeling the loss of her. The vulnerability is mirrored.

Which is tragic because YOU GUYS ARE LITERALLY HAVING A LUNCH DATE WITH MUCH PDA.

Anyways, this probably went in circles or I've just regurgitated a lot of ideas from this morning.

[anadiluna]

Serenity.

Bada Lee X fem reader.

Reader is the only female member of bts lol

Warnings: angst, fluff as hell, reader is problematic, drug use?¿

It's my first time posting on tumblr so I don't know how to write these warnings or whatever. I'm struggling to find where the hell I should put the title😭.

I looked so serene, my sleep figure rested on Bada's body, my face buried into her neck, she had her arms wrapped around me, her chin resting on the top of my head, eyes closed and a small smile on her lips, she also looked serene, I admired the picture for some moments, all kinds of good emotions twirling on my chest until something caught my attention, one of my arms rested on her waist and my hand was tugging the fabric of her hoodie as if I was scared that she would escape, I didn't remember doing that when I was woke.

Memories from my past relationship, fights about how emotionally dependent I was, his face contorting in a disgusted frown when I hugged him, suddenly my world was falling apart.

How could I be so desperate to be in her arms? A sense of shame hit my heart and my mind, the realization of everyone probably knowing that I loved her differently made me feel so ashamed, not because she is a woman, I would never feel ashamed of that, just being perceived as someone vulnerable was enough for me.

Moments traveled through my mind, I've been so clingy with her through the last months, I laughed too much, I hugged her too much, I showed all the feelings I wanted to show and didn't even realize, although she never rejected me or said anything bad, but rather happily accepted all of that, I couldn't let go of the feeling that I was probably suffocating her like this, I felt so bad, she probably felt disgusted just like him, right? She didn't say anything about it to not hurt me, she didn't say anything because she felt sorry for the girl who doesn't have anyone besides her members. I felt so disgusted with myself, I just wanted to bury myself alive so I could never bother her again.

The days went by and the rejection feeling I planted on my chest only grew, every time I was around her the feeling of wanting to be in her arms and hug her was terribly strong, but the shame I felt was bigger, and even when she hugged me I couldn't put my hands over hers like I always did.

"Why are you not hugging me anymore?", she said hugging me and leaning her head on my shoulders as we left the practice studio, her voice sounded hurt, but my mind wouldn't let me believe she was hurt.

-----------------------

"Aren't you coming anymore?", she said over the phone, the background sounded noisy, and I could hear Lusher screaming a song in the karaoke room.

"I have to finish a song today, I'm sorry...", I wanted to be there, but I don't know, her friends are probably over me as much as she is.

"Okay, I think... good luck! Good night Harinnie.", she said sweetly but from her voice I could feel that she was quite hurt, again.

My mind was a mess, even if I knew that she was hurt by my actions I also thought she couldn't bear looking at my face.

"Good night.", I said turning off the call.

I looked beside my bed and saw the jar of pills prescribed by the psychiatrist, took more than I could in my hands, and chugged down with water hoping to sleep as fast as possible so I wouldn't have to deal with my emotions.

-----------------------

"I have a deadline for a son..." Haerin tried to lie but she was cut before she could finish her sentence.

"HAERIN!", the smaller girl flinched at Bada's scream. "I'm sorry", Bada said touching her arm, Bada's voice echoed in her head, her sight was blurry, and she was completely drugged as a result of the pills she had been eating like candy every day for the last 3 weeks.

"Tell me what is happening, please.", Bada begged, her voice was sweet but hurt, the usual from the last days. "I cannot pretend everything's fine, you've been acting so different and...", she was teary-eyed and said her words in a choke. "You're hurting me", she sighned lowering her head, she didn't know what to do anymore, it seemed like suddenly Haerin didn't care about anything or anyone, she didn't talk or eat, she just followed her instructions like a robot, not showing any emotion. Bada had seen Haerin going through her ups and downs in their years of friendship, but nothing looked like this, her heart was scrunching and she felt like she lost Haerin forever, she was desperate to take her back to life.

Haerin did not know what to do, she didn't feel guilt or any sense of empathy, she just didn't feel anything.

"When I look at you, I can't even recognize your eyes...", Haerin's eyes normally had the prettiest sparkle looked opaque, the bags under her eyes were in a weird red tone, realization hit Bada, she remembered the fight she overhead one day, where Namjoon was screaming at Haerin for taking more pills than she should. She could almost hear Namjoon's angry statement.

"Look at you, you don't even look like yourself.".

Bada got up and took Haerin's bag, the girl was too slow to react, as expected. She found the guilty, a jar of medicine almost empty.

"That's what you've been doing? That's why you're acting like that, right?", Bada almost screamed, anger and sadness filling her heart at the thought of Haerin drugging herself, her eyes filled with tears, she tried to hold back but it was too much.

"Why did you do that? What is happening?", she asked again but it was hopeless to try and talk to Haerin at that moment, and even if she was angry she understood why Haerin couldn't just talk when facing her downs.

"I don't know... I'm sorry Bada.", Haerin whispered, her eyes looked so empty, so vain, yet she was so vulnerable.

When Bada heard her saying her name all the anger left her body leaving her only with sadness, the tears made their way down her cheeks, she tried not to sob but it was impossible, she knew Haerin just needed someone to understand her.

"I'll take you home, you're gonna stop doing that, I'll be by your side all of the time, and when you get better we'll talk, okay?". Bada wrapped her arms around Haerin's body, she knew Haerin was basically the personification of the side effects of being drugged and that her actions weren't matching her intentions, but still hurt her deeply when Haerin didn't hug her back. "You're gonna be okay. We'll be okay.".

-----------------------

The sea waves break in front of us, and our skin is not burned by the sun but rather caressed by the cold, humid wind. The pain in my heart seems to get even worse when I realize I have nowhere to escape, I owe satisfaction to her, the person who laughs with me in the good moments also wants to cry with me in the sad ones.

"I am the problem, these feelings come and go like waves, they invade my heart and mind intensively as if I'm drowning, until the despair of trying to breathe stops, and suddenly I can breathe underwater, but the burning pain of being filled with salt water stays.", the weight on my shoulders feels less heavy, but now she's just like the last people who loved me and left me, now she knows my downs, I showed to her how messed up I am and everything will start to break in front of my eyes until the day she will disappear.

Her eyes were full of worry, her eyebrows slightly furred, and a small pout on her lips. "I know you hate to show vulnerability and I'm sorry that I forced you to do that, but Haerinnie...", she turned her body to me and intertwined our fingers. "I love you so much. I want to be the person who you will be sincere with, I want you to feel at home when you're with me as much as I feel when I'm with you.", her eyes were teary and her nose a bit red by the cold, the wind made her strands of hair loosen and perfectly flow like waves, she looked like the agitated sea in front of us, the most beautiful mess I've ever seem.

I wanted to say I was a mess and that if she kept seeing how broken I was she would get tired and soon leave, but she would say it's not true, she would promise to never leave me and I would believe with all of my heart, thinking I finally found someone, but as the years go by and time passes destiny would show me I was wrong for the thousandth time, and I would be alone again.

"I'm sorry for making you go through this hell, I will never do this again, I hate hurting you."

Warm tears kept streaming down my cheeks while I sobbed desperately but silently, that pain was too much to bear, watching everything happen again was breaking every piece of my soul and I felt so hopeless.

"My baby...", she said in a choke, she sounded so hurt by just seeing me like that, I can't believe I've done this to her.

"I'm sorry.", I looked down, hands on my head as I colored her blue.

She carefully pulled me into a hug, touching me as if I could break at any moment, my head rested in between her neck and chest, and my tears soaked her skin and shirt. I could feel her shoulders shaking and her uneven breath, her soft cheeks resting on the side of my head as quiet sobs left her lips.

After some moments we both calmed down and all we could hear was the sea waves breaking on the coast.

"Look at me, Haerinnie.", she whispered.

I didn't want to, I felt too ashamed for putting her in that position, for making her cry so much about things she didn't even know.

I hugged even tighter, hiding my face deeper on her neck. A small giggle left her lips making my heart feel a bit warmer.

"Please baby, I want to say something to you.", she said with her lips almost inside my ear, making me laugh and slightly pull away from her by the agonizing sensation.

Our gazes met, she admired me with a loving smile on her lips while caressing my cheeks and fixing my hair. My eyes still glint with nervousness but I could not help but smile at the sight, my hands gently caressed her wrists.

"I am so lucky to have you, you're my favorite person in the world.", she pulled my face closer and gave small pecks on my cheeks.

I pouted at her statements, how can someone be so easy to love? How can someone be so sincere like that? It felt like my heart was melting in my chest.

"I love you so so much.", I made sure to look at her eyes while saying it so she could feel my sincerity as much as I felt hers.

Her smile widened and her eyes had so much emotion. "I love you more Harinnie, my Harinnie.", her arms wrapped around me and she pulled me into one more bear hug, inhaling my scent as she shrugged her face in my shoulders.

While feeling the warmth of being loved I could not help but think about the impact she has on me. I was feeling so down, so desperate, and hopeless for so many days and then she pulled me out of this as if my bad thoughts didn't have any meaning, making me feel so loved, with such eagerness to live life, this never happened before, no one ever had this power over me, her way of thinking and dealing with life was changing me to someone who could be better to myself, the world hasn't been the same since I was met with her happiness.

[forestdivinity]

Blitz & the Full Moon Episode & autism

I am once again talking about autistic blitz and just the Full Moon episode and this is a ramble but hh stick with itt?? I have so many thoughttssss but there are Spoilers so don't read if you havent watched the episode yet!

I'm thinking of how Stolas like walks out when he thinks Blitz is rejecting him and how Blitz takes that as a rejection and blows up in return. Like if they'd both just taken a minute to breathe it wouldn't have ended in such a disaster

From what I've seen, Blitz is someone who needs time to process especially in interpersonal relationships, and he's so sensitive to rejection & blames himself as soon as it happens but will self protect by externalising and projecting those feelings onto the person who's hurt him. Not saying this is a healthy mechanism btw!

I feel like if he had time to think past his initial gut reactions he would have been able to at least talk without screaming because we see he can be emotionally vulnerable like when he talks to Fizz in Oops! but rejection and feeling unworthy hit him haaaard, (like Fizz's birthday), and he reacts with anger first to hide how upset he is He's quick to cover up but I don't think he's someone who's that great at reading social situations as he projects himself to be, even with the candle shopkeeper he struggles to describe the mood and vibe hes going for. Blitz projects himself as outwardly confident because it's easier for him to have this facade than admit when he has difficulties in certain situations. In 'Oops' he totally misses Fizz's sarcasm when he's talking about Stolas and their relationship while denying that Stolas could like him. I think this comes from both a place of self-loathing & denial but also him missing that Fizz isn't actually agreeing with him. Emotions & words relating to them dont come easy to Blitz because he's autistic but also he rarely got the kind of support and emotional teaching in childhood he needed from the people around him. Like im sure Tilla tried but we know she was ill and that Cash is a dick who uses this to exploit Blitz (such as forcing him to steal from Stolas as a child) and I think that man has the parenting ability of a teaspoon. He's manipulative and even from a young age teaches Blitz that relationships are transactional (selling Blitz in the first place) which I think was ten times more impactful and traumatising for Blitz as a child seeing how he approaches relationships as an adult and that's even not getting into his self worth issues surround Fizz and the fire and Barbie. And like with Verosika happening… I want to know how old he was when they dated, how long it lasted. She has his name tattooed on her there must have been some emotional connection, but what happened between them to lead to Blitz blowing up again. What was their relationship like. It's said (implied? I don't remember exact words) that Blitz was her bodyguard first so that's another relationship that started out transactional! I think Blitz is emotionally a very immature character and he clings to structured relationships that he can push the boundaries of. Loona is his adopted daughter. Millie and Moxxie are his employees. There's structure and expectations to those relationships and he's the one who pushes for more and tries to develop them. It freaks him out when someone turns the tables because he doesn't have the rules and scripts in his head I think?? Stolas is changing the structure of their relationship and Blitz panics and tries to retreat to what he knows works (sex) which isn't what Stolas wants and we see the aftermath of this! But if what the 'you royals always do this' line implies is true he's been thru at least something similar before and is maybe falling back into old patterns and hurts when he perceives Stolas as rejecting him & his advances (putting his hat on, disparaging the roleplay, and leaving the room). Beyond the class issue and fear of losing his business when Stolas asks for the book back permanently the first spot where things go wrong for their personal relationship is when Blitz goes 'oh this is a roleplay' and I can just see the gears turning of him like just trying to fit this new information into the established framework of their relationship. Sex is comfortable for Blitz, the transactional nature of their relationship is comfortable and scripted and easy (he says this at the start of the episode!) and when pushed out of that comfort zone he panics. We see him panic!

I think part of him probably liked that there were certain expectations and structure to the contract before even if he complained about stolas being horny and like Stolas baby, I know things changed in you but the very start of your relationship is you calling him while he's being shot to like talk about how you want his cock. I love Stolas too don't get me wrong but your whole relationship is based around sex. Blitz has said to you in the past that he feels like he's only used for sex (Ozzie's!) and that's the expectation he has of the relationship. And like we know Stolas has tried to gently reach out especially since Ozzie's but Blitz is autistic doesnt do subtlety, like we can see that in how he treats people around him. He's brash and open and doesn't know how to read a room (like the first CHERUB episode he texts the client that they fucked up because he thinks people can't get angry over texts??) IDK people go on about how Stolas is autistic and yeah I can see that but to me Blitz is the epitome of the 'bad autistic' who is too open, too rough, too liable to blow up and meltdown and react with anger and violence. (MOOD BABYGIRL)

Blitz is terrified of change unless he initiates it and even then he struggles (see him trying to confess to Fizz). And like there's just so much about him that screams autistic to me. Like his meeting with moxxie when they're in jail and moxxie is crying and blitz is like :D HI WANNA BREAK OUT! Blitz doesn't get the social code and I think he's worked so hard to come off as this blasé 'idgaf' person when in reality he doesn't know how he should act in certain situations but it's better if it seems intentional because then people just think he's an asshole instead of a freak. The like 'haha we are laughing together' instead of 'you are laughing at me' (in a bad way). Like just, the whole scene with him trying to tell Jokes in The Circus episode and it falling flat and falling back on his special interest (horse facts!) but the audience finding him just strange vs how they react to Fizz. He decides to adopt Loona but he still struggles with connecting to her and respecting her boundaries as a neglected young adult and treats her more like a younger child in a lot of ways because that's his idea of like the perfect father-daughter bond and he doesn't know how to course correct. Even in Full Moon we see how he like goes overboard in telling Moxxie how he's horny and wants to fuck Stolas and Moxxie is like TMI don't tell me that.

JUST for me Blitz is just so relatable in a lot of ways. He is a person who craves connection but struggles with how to make that meaningfully so he has dropped himself into certain molds to try and fit what people expect of him but even then he does it in the wrong way. He tries to be what he thinks Stolas wants (based on their OG deal and past interactions) by saying oh this a roleplay and its a sex thing but fucks it up because Stolas is asking for change and he doesn't know how to do that especially in a sudden and unexpected situation. And he's someone who is highly competent but struggles so severely with emotional regulation and timing and social contracts and just idk. So so many of my meltdowns ended in screaming because I neeed space and time to emotionally process when something is Happening and if I don't get that (like Stolas assuming things are over and leaving when Blitz is realising Oh This Is Something I Need to Process) my first defense mechanism is to reflect my struggle outwards in anger and Blitz is exactly the same!! And again this isn't healthy but we know Blitz isn't healthy right now (in the trailer he legit says he doesn't want to be like this forever)! And don't get me wrong I know why Stolas threw him out when he started yelling (Stolas has his own PTSD triggers from Stella) but goddd boys you need to sit down and work this out calmly with processing time!! Like sooo many people see Stolas as autistic because he's quiet and socially awkward and nerdy about the things he loves which is a valid interpretation but Blitz is just my CPTSD undiagnosed autistic who has learnt the worst coping mechanisms because he was never allowed anything else and always expects things to turn out badly. Isn't it easier if you're the one to ruin things? At least he knows what to expect!!

Ughghg I have so many more thoughts but this post is already a mile longgg so if you want to yell more about blitz just come into my asks lmaoo

(Btw I love Stolas too and this is not anti stolitz, they are gonna work this out but Blitz is just my scrunklyyy)

[driftingqueer]

Kit's my favorite character his design and arc and everything he lives among my heartstrings and is the best, he's also the one who's the closest to me personally and emotionally, Kit in forever has always been othered and isolated for who he is, his intentions are assumed by a factor beyond his control, he didn't choose to be a soulless creature, he didn't want to deceive anyone, all he wanted was to be happy which is the most natural desire one can have, and having someone by his side made him happy but nobody stayed by his side when they knew who he truly was, so he just wanted to change who he was, he wanted to become human and make meaningful connections with someone, the mogui's deals always trigger a subject vulnerable to those he offers, when he had the chance to become human, to be someone who'll be accepted and can have friends without any hiding of his true nature why wouldn't he do everything in his power to make that happen? everything he has yearned for, love, care, acceptance, trust, understanding can come to him if he could just fulfill the deal and become human, then he can have someone who'd stay by his side

But Kit is soo innately loving, he isn't the monster they paint him to be, even if he isn't exactly the human he paints himself to be, he never wants to harm anyone, he befriended jentry to work his way into fulfilling his part of the deal, but he found something he's always yearned for, something that his heart knows is worth everything, something for which he wanted to make the deal in the first place, he found someone who is fond of him, someone who likes to hang out with him, someone who knows how it feels like when everyone around you sees you as demon and not yourself, someone who told him "a soul is what you choose to be", these words liberated him they made him feel how he still is alive and a valid being and he doesn't have to be human he can be whoever he is and that this someone, like jentry, would still stay by his side, because she would believe in who he chose to be and not reduce him to his form. even after the mogui told him that it would never work out, kit felt so profoundly about those words, the idea of being loved and accepted without having to completely change his entire state of being, being seen for who he is not what he seems to be, he wanted to believe in it, he doesn't ponder over what if there really isn't anyone like that, that what if even jentry rejects him, he wants to believe in it like if he could believe hard enough he can make it happen, he tries to confide her with his truth, even with the flashbacks of how everytime he did it the ones he loved left him,

he craved a genuine connection and wanted to go against what the universe had him was the reality, that he has to be human and have a soul if he wants a genuine connection with those he love.

I honestly cried when jentry who made him feel this outright rejected him.

honestly okay so with jentry, who immediately deemed kit with what he seemed to be, a demon sent by Mr Cheng who deceived her and is after her powers, she's hurt and angry, someone she liked to be around, someone she trusted, it was lies and she felt betrayed and tired with these demons and darkness even infiltrating her normal life to the point where they're trying to use her own emotions against her by making her think a demon working for Mr Cheng as a friend.

Later when Jentry couldn't even trust her gugu and was stuck and confused and lost and angry, she reached out to Kit, she knew he hurt her but she was desperate enough to take the gamble and believe him when he said he isn't working for Cheng anymore, she did feel Kit to be harmless and reached out to him, she realised that the entire relation and all the feelings Kit had were not a lie and he was used by Mr Cheng who used his desperation for his own benefit, after feeling used by her Gugu she could empathise with him in a way and wanted to give him a second chance believing in him and asked for his help.

To kit, who was broken and lost and honestly I cannot put it into words, was soo thrilled when he realised he could make things right with jentry by just helping her get rid of her powers, by helping her with something she wanted really bad.

He does whatever she asks of, he tries to make up for hurting her, he does it, jentry gets rid of her powers with his help, he did it, after centuries, he can now have a friend who'd stay by his side.

Jentry doesn't have her powers anymore, she can now live the normal life she's always yearned for, those powers that had such a significant effect on her life were gone now, jentry who associates the supernatural with every thing bad that has happened can now live normally, Kit is obsessively trying to be a part of her life but that's just not what she needs right now, those powers that were entangled with her trauma are gone, but the trauma stays, when a little child, a nine year old jentry accidentally set fire to half the town and has been trying to move on while still living in the guilt and horror of it, the powers because of which her parents died, her own gugu lied and manipulated her, she's finally free now, this is the way it always should have been, now that she has a chance for a normal life why would she let another supernatural being become a part of it when she's desperately wanted to cut the ties with those kind of forces, she tells him like it is, normal is what she needs right now and her having relations with kit can not be normal cuz kit is not normal even if that's not wrong or his fault

Kit, is confused to say the least, so jentry wants normal, he can make gestures of affection towards her like making her a painting of her, but jentry doesn't want any of that, she doesn't want any of him. this whole conversation they have kit shows her the painting fucking kills me, like when kit says micheal doesn't know her like he does and jentry snaps back with a what knows me in having spied all my interests way? I think kit meant it in a how they both know the feeling of being used for powers and being treated like a demon, but jentry continues to speak without pausing that she can't have a normal life with kit by her side and the she states a list of his paint skin demon traits, what kit says breaks my heart when he goes "so I'm more human than i know but not human enough for you is that why you're saying no?"

here kit equates humaness to normalcy in this case whereas when the "you're more human than you know" conversation took place it equated humaness to the qualities of humanity like those of benevolence, kindness and caring etc even though these aren't qualities exclusive to human ofc

when jentry replies back with that it shouldn't matter why she's saying no because she doesn't want people pushing her into things she doesn't want any more, this is the end of conversation, jentry doesn't want to anything else but normal and she's not gonna let those forces of supernatural and what not seep back into her life, kit is frustrated and angry, not at her but himself, why is he not normal? if he were normal he could be with jentry, he leaves after saying that jentry should get what she wants, if she wants normal then kit will become normal, he'll become human for her, then he can have her by his side, he can have a true and genuine connection with someone, that's all he yearns for.

Kit takes up Mr Cheng's deal and steals the robes, he has to do this so that everything can be alright, he can become human and join jentry and they go on with normal life, just this one wrong thing can lead to what he has yearned for as long as he can remember. He's willing to bear the sin of this steal, because being able to be human and have someone by his side, having jentry by his side, is worth everything.

things go downhill, kit tries to explain "im sorry I did it for us.. I wanted to be human for you.. I wanna make this right"

Jentry is hurt hard but not just hurt she's pissed she trusted kit gave him a second chance and he betrayed her again, guess the books were not too far from the truth when they called him 'a deceitful demon who's emotionless and drains qi'

I honestly could hear my heart snap in two when she said "if you're still out here when we head out, I'll treat you like every other demon that gets in my way"

Kit who never was human but still felt the most human he could around jentry now was dehumanized and reduced to his demonism, he made a mistake and that mistake now defined his identity, all he wanted was someone to stay by his side but why would anyone want to stay by the side of a demon, he has hurt and lost the trust of the only person who believed in him, the only person he thought he could have by his side.

Jentry was his everything, she made him feel how a soul wasn't what made him human, she believed in him, he'd needed jentry so much that he didn't want to entertain the thought that she doesn't need him in his life, so he did everything he could to make her want to keep him in his life, he gave up tryna be human but then he went to trying for real and hard, but now he just doesn't know, he's confused and lost, he needs to make this right and help her even if jentry sees him as a demon because of his mistakes he will make them right he will help her at the cost of his own life

Jentry, while looking at kit's lifeless body, realises how he never betrayed her, he made mistakes and hurt her but he never wanted to and was always ready and wanting to make up for them, he always stood by her side, she was wrong about him, she's sorry. "Hope your soul find it's place".

Kit and Jentry are my favorite characters I wish I could articulate what I feel and think about them aarsgshhshsh

This one scene where kit makes a painting of jentry is so cute like earlier in the episode he saw jentry gifting micheal a drawing she did of him, he determines this as one of the normal gestures of expressing affection, he makes a painting for her but he doesn't fake being normal with his art, he draws her like he sees her with the qi flowing inside her, I like to think this was intentional like nobody knew kit was a paint skin before he told anyone so he must have been careful and had some practice of trying to fit in after centuries but with jentry since he felt he could be himself around her he painted her like he would hehe

Kit And Queerness

Kit's character is more queer coded than the fucking rainbow itself aahshjsjs, like the queer allegorical symbolism is fun and angst and cool with how him hiding his true identity and feeling rejected for who he truly is so closeted queer teen of him, him desperately wishing he could be a human and had a soul and wasn't in the form of being he is, is soo trans coded, trans people wishing they were born with their desired body and could make friends who see em as their true identity. And ofc the whole paint skin deal, my man kit can put on a skin of any gender he wants, be it a slightly above average looking white guy or of our homegirl jentry. Kit's character has been implied to have had past relationships with people of more than one gender and stuff too I believe. Ofc he's awesome and transcends the bounds of gender and stuff.

The scene where he's sewing the flesh and stuff and jentry is kinda freaked out by it, it's all so lowkey body horror coded vibes and that shit queer asf ofc, queer bodies being a subject of discomfort for others, creating a body you feel comfortable in while trying to find and be yourself even if that body defies who you truly are etc etc

[scaphismpriest]

Tiktok is a cesspool of ableism against narcissists and usually I shake my head and roll my eyes, but i just saw a Tiktok comment that made my blood boil.

Keep in mind that this was on a cluster B safe post, and someone manages to think its okay to blame abuse on NARCISSISM. I am a person with BPD and NPD, im not going to get personal in my life because this is the internet and not everyone needs to know what ive fucking been through, but i know for damn sure that "narc abuse" is not a fucking thing and generalizes narcissists to be abusers and dangerous people. Sure, you can get abused by a narcissist, but you can also get abused by literary ANYONE, this is why you dont see people say "im suffering from blonde abuse" or "im recovering from christian abuse" because nobody in their fucking right mind would use someones appearance, race, mental health, religon, physical ability, gender, sexuality, ETC as a excuse to label and generalize a group of people to describe abuse. I had a ex girlfriend who would abuse me and she had BPD, I have a mother who also emotionally and verbally abuses me and shes schizophrenic. You dont see me say "im recovering from borderline abuse" or "im suffering from schizophrenic abuse" because that generalizes people with BPD and schizophrenia to be abusers. Do you see the fucking problem here yet? Oh but when its narcissists, or people with "scary mental disorders" like ASPD, then its suddenly okay to label us as scary abusers or dangerous people? Some of You claim to be advocates for mental health but when it comes to us then you suddenly give up because we're "too much for you to waste your time on" or that we're "Hopeless" and "Helpless" if you so called "Empaths", egotypicals, and neurotypicals actually gave a fucking shit about us, you would understand that we've also been hurt, we've been treated like shit and neglected by the world, we bite because we are scared, we are constantly in a battle of self hate and fake ego, we are insecure, we depend on attention and success to survive, we are neglected children at our core. if you really gave a shit about mental health and our well being, i wouldn't be here thinking "wow man i should really rid myself because the world views me as nothing but a monster so therefore i should off myself!" "but you've also hurt people!" I know, I am aware, I've already taken that accountabilty and MAJOR steps into becoming into a better person and have recovered greatly these past months and you dont know or understand me more than the people ive hurt personally, you dont get a say in what happens because thats NOT your ground to stand on and say whatever YOU think and ive had people disrespect that. I am FORTUNATE to even be loved and cared for still by the person ive hurt, and even I myself dont feel like I deserve that such mercy, I am forever grateful but It also makes me truly sad, not for myself, but for the person I love the most. I genuinely cried writing this, this is more so a vent but I hope someone sees this and atleast understand me on a true empathic level, instead of a perception. I hope i dont regret posting this, because this is the most youre gonna see me vulnerable for a LONG time.

[kimbapisnotsushi]

going insaneeeee pls give us more stz / semiten hcs 🙏🙏

anon i would be HONORED to!!!!

semiten get together because ushijima doesn't realize that tendou's feelings are supposed to be a secret

not that he like. outright tells semi i just mean that ushijima sets them up a lot bc of it

semi: "yeah so the record shop is doing this exhibit downtown over the weekend, and—" ushijima: "tendou would be happy to go with you. you should ask him" semi: ". . . what"

ushijima is the number one semiten wingman without even realizing it honestly

also despite tendou's tendencies to wreak havoc i think he and semi are a super lowkey quiet couple when it comes down to it!! they probably get a lot of "you guys are dating??? it doesn't look like it" comments from other people tbh but they don't care, as long as they know each other's intentions then it's fine <3

the only times they do pda is when tendou particularly wants to rub it into someone's face that he's got the most amazing boyfriend in the world or just wants to brag about semi in general. especially if someone is being really annoying ABOUT semi

some asshole: "yeah i don't know why semi's so popular, it's not like he's anything special-" tendou, grabbing semi's hand: "oh would you look at that my SUPER-HOT and SUPER-SWEET boyfriend offered to get me boba!! isn't he so nice??? isn't he the best??? everyone else should learn from you or they might get broken up with. come on eita let's go before they close :3"

and then he gives the most cutting glare to said asshole because he knows for a fact that said asshole refused to buy anything from the vending machines for his gf when she asked

(GOD now i'm thinking about a fic where tendou realizes his feelings for semi + confesses bc other students keep going to him for help to confess to semi and tendou's like "well of COURSE so many people like him he'd be a great boyfriend! wait—")

anyways when they get to the boba shop tendou is the one who treats as compensation for dragging semi into his scheme

OH ALSO if ushijima gets all of tendou's pining and yearning and ranting then reon and yamagata gets semi's :333

it's worse for reon actually because i champion the "reon and tendou roomies" hc which means he goes back to his dorm room at the end of the day after listening to semi and has to face tendou . . . he bears a heavy burden on his shoulders

any time a classmate says some rich kid shit that pisses shirabu off he's like "i should have fucking gone to karasuno" under his breath and the first time tendou hears him say it, tendou laughs so hard he almost passes out

goshiki's obsessed with gacha machine collections. once he chooses a series he's going to do his best to get all of them. right now he's working his way through collecting an ice cream float series where all of the colors are violently neon gradients

(yes this is bc i saw an ice cream float one in real life. yes they were very pretty and i regret not giving it a chance)

the others help him out too!!! whenever they see a machine that has it and goshiki isn't there they always take a chance for him. shirabu got him a new one for his collection and was like "ugh here i don't understand the point of all this but it's useless to me anyways i know you've been looking for it" bc he wouldn't know being emotionally vulnerable if it socked him in the face. and then goshiki almost cried

he won't say it but that's his favorite one

what does goshiki do with them you ask??? uhhh. good question

he keeps the ones he doesn't use on his desk!! otherwise he puts them on his phone or backpack or whatever. and whenever he gets extras he passes them on to other people!!

he becomes really well-known amongst his classmates for being the gachapon items dealer LMAO

i think yamagata is also really really good at all other sports as opposed to, like, the others who are only really good at volleyball. he always dominates during the sports festival and also causes beef with like every other sports team at shiratorizawa

kawanishi hates the uniforms. he's like the shoujo high school romance rebel bad boy cliche come to life when it comes to the shiratorizawa uniforms. he'll leave them untucked and wrinkled and he'll shed them like snake skin the second he can. it's stiff and heavy and hot and he HATES it okay he wasn't built for this!!

on that note i think he and semi share similar fashion tastes!! they go shopping together a lot and hence kawanishi hears all of semi's lamenting about shirabu

look i truly really genuinely do believe semi tries. but shirabu makes it so HARD.

give me the fluffy slice-of-life comedy where semi tries to become Mentor of the Year and wears down shirabu's walls like sandpaper. i just think it'd be really fucking funny you know???

hold on . . . i have things to plan now . . .

[olderthannetfic]

I'm the anon complaining about the f!AU with the weepy characters and I guess I failed to mention that the fic writer is doing a 1:1 rewrite of certain parts of canon with some of the characters genderbent.

So when I complain that she turned them weepier and more naive/stupid than they were in canon, it's not some inference of mine about how the canon characters would act, it's a direct comparison of canon vs. fic.

The canon can be pretty whumpy as well, but it makes sure to push the hypercompetent characters to their limits before making them break down, so you get a very clear idea of how far each one of them can be pushed before they're a suicidal mess.

Here are some examples:

- Character A is canonically a super open-minded, philosophical guy. That's one of his chief canon traits. When he realizes that he's sexually attracted to Character B, who is also a man, and that the attraction is reciprocated and could be consumed, his canonical reaction is "Hmmm don't mind if I don't! A gentleman should try every vice at least once!" It's actually B who's a bit reluctant about it because A is younger and more inexperienced, while A is making moon eyes at B and chasing him even after he gets married. He doesn't feel an ounce of anguish or conflict about having gay feelings for his friend at any point. In the genderbend, Character A is so anguished about "having those types of feelings" towards B that she bursts into tears and needs to be comforted. Character A has canonically faced the death of close family members and their own possible complicity in a close friend's execution without this extreme a reaction.

- Character B is canonically a trauma survivor, which has left him with a tough-skinned mentality and an impatience towards weakness and emotional outbursts. In canon, whenever someone reacts emotionally, he's underestimating of it at best and snappish/aggressive at worst, demanding that the other characters put themselves together. When his endgame love interest bursts into tears once (years after the scene from the AU takes place), he just angrily leaves the room because he can't handle it. In the f!AU, B empathically notices character A's anguish right before she's about to cry, and then she's solicitous and comforting and soothing towards B. Canon!B has a long tradition of dismissing A's concerns every time A is angry or emotional.

- Character C was seduced by the manipulative villainess at a young and vulnerable age, and then met her again after going through years of adversity. Character C's main traits in canon are that the adversity has left him cold and calculating and repressed, as well as very Machiavellian, so when he's back with the villainess he's no longer believing her bullshit and is masterfully using her for his own ends. In the genderbend, Character C's experiences of adversity have left her desperate for connection instead of closed off and mistrustful, so she falls right back into the villainess's arms because she craves comfort and genuinely needs to snap out of the manipulation. She breaks down the first time the villainess puts on her fake empathetic charm and seeks comfort like a child.

I understand that some of these (esp the last one) are the fic author's preferences for weepy whump but it just rubs me, personally, the wrong way how the only change is the characters' gender and yet the genderbent versions react a lot more along the stereotypical lines of "women weep a lot and put themselves in abusive situations because they can't stand being alone".

I love the canon characters for the mix of roguish badassery, grey morality, and complex inner lives, and I was SO looking forward to seeing female characters with the same mix of traits. What I found was closer to fainting Victorian ladies. I wouldn't be against seeing the female characters have mental breakdowns as well - as I said, they do happen in canon, and canon is also full of complex female characters who react to trauma in various ways - but I feel like there needs to be enough setup to explain why if you don't want them to come off as whinier and less resilient versions of the male ones.

--

[darlington-v]

going through tumblr for posts supporting shubble and what she went through, when it is mostly people talking about whether or not it was wilbur. like not many are actually talking about shubble or the shit she went through or how brave she is for talking about it, so i want to.

before i start, i'm not going to shy away from the fact that she is talking about wilbur. i as a third-party am able to call him out right where shubble isn't at liberty to. i'm not going to talk about him, though, which is the point. i want to focus on shubble.

that being said, the shit wilbur put them through was horrific. i really wish shubble the absolute best and i really think that she is so endlessly brave for going on stream to talk about this when they wouldn't know how the public would have reacted, and to share such a place of vulnerability to an audience. that's so hard and so scary, especially up against a public figure.

she said she felt like the bravest person in the world by telling her story, and she absolutely was.

shubble said that when she realized she was being abused she was so angry at herself. and when she talked about how it was just a slow incline of it getting worse and worse, it's so... i dont know shubble but i feel so deeply for her. because she wasn't stupid. she was choosing to believe the best in someone, over and over again and it is despicable for it to be exploited but it is nothing to be ashamed or feel stupid about. and i think her telling her story is just more evident of how big of a person, how courageous they are because like... them telling her story WILL help people. it helped me. it helped reassure me of my own experiences and it just really helped reinstate that like.

it's not crazy to be nice to someone, it's not crazy or bad to believe in the best in someone. and at the end of it, when you've been exploited, it's not your fault. and you're not wrong for prioritizing yourself and choosing yourself over them when you do leave. even if it feels small because it didn't feel violent enough, it didn't feel close enough to the image of abuse you had in your head. you're not crazy for choosing to leave a place or a person who hurts you.

wilbur soot hurt shubble repeatedly, he bit her to the point where she was bruising and he did it in front of their fucking friends. he showed the bruises off to their friends. it got to the point where he was biting her every fucking day, multiple times a day, and hurting her on purpose.

he took advantage of shubble and her kindness. he made her feel like she had to lie about what she was going through, was fine with keeping the relationship as bad as it was because of his own choices to not rise above and actually meet not just her emotionally, but his own emotions, and she was able to put herself above all of that and get out.

i'm really glad she's okay now, that she's had the opportunity to heal, and feels safe enough to talk about this and warn others not only of wilbur but also of how abuse can look in ways you don't expect it to.

here's an archive link to the vod. it's literally just 30 minutes long and i think it's a very important watch, theres a lot of really dangerous behavior from wilbur that she talks about that's important to know about. not only because it's important information about this individual, but it is important to know what abuse looks like and how it can feel so minor when you're in the middle of it until it gets to a breaking point.

i'm glad shubble had friends and resources who helped her feel like her experiences werent less than, were very real, because it helps solidify it not just for herself but also to everyone she can reach out to by talking about this.