#but I did it fast lol

[pudgecuddles]

Rich boy Namjoon goes to a furniture store run by Taehyung looking for a new armchair since he outgrew his last one.

Namjoon huffed and puffed as he waddled into the air conditioned store, Kim’s Furnishings. You see, he needed a new arm chair as he had broken his old one just the day before.

He wouldn’t really bother to do this himself, if he wasn’t so picky about the types of furniture he liked. For example, his current sofa is just too hard to get up and off of. He needs something sturdy, stylish and convenient.

“Hello! Welcome in!” A silky, baritone voice called out to him. “Oh dear, let me get you a bottle of water, I knew it was too hot out today.”

It really wasn’t. It was only 75 degrees out. Namjoon was just unused to walking nowadays.

Nevertheless, Namjoon looked up at his savior and gratefully replied, “Uhm, if you have a coke instead, I’ll take that.”

The other man, probably his age or younger, agreed. “I’ve got plain, zero or diet.”

Namjoon blushed, “Plain please. Or cherry if you have it. I’ll pay!”

“No need! Not for a customer.” His name tag said ‘Kim Taehyung’. “Right this way!”

Oh jeez, more walking. At least this time he was out of the sun. The store seemed pretty empty too, so there were no judging eyes to watch him waddle around.

Here you go! Taehyung handed over a sixteen ounce bottle of coke. “I got one with a screw top so you can carry it around the store without worrying about spill-”

-UUUUUURRRRRP!-

Namjoon had already opened and chugged the bottle down before Taehyung even finished talking.

“Ahh, that hit the spot. Thank you, Taehyung.” Namjoon handed back the empty bottle to the owner.

“O-Of course,” Taehyung said. “Lets get you to our showing rooms then. What are you looking for today?”

“A new armchair. Preferably one with a cup holder and made out of anything other than leather, that shit sticks to my skin.” Namjoon shuddered.

“Okay then, any styles you prefer? Modern? Traditional?”

“Modern please, that would fit with the rest of my décor.”

“Perfect, follow me. Our armchair collection is right this way.” Taehyung stopped dead in front of the stairs leading up to the second floor of the showroom. He took a moment to look up and down at Namjoon’s obese body. “Uhm, will you need assistance with the stairs? We have an elevator if you’d prefer to use that.”

Elevators were Namjoon’s greatest fear. He was terrified that he’d step into one one day and break it. That he’d grown too big to take them.

“I-I’ll take the stairs.” It was only about thirteen steps in total, kind of on the low side for the average stair case. This would be fine! “Here we go!”

Lifting even one flabby leg onto the first step made Namjoon want to just turn around and give up. The second step made him want to die. Oh god, he was going to be a panting, sweaty mess by the end of this wasn’t he?

Regardless, he continued. One foot in front of the other, bulging belly slapping against his thick thighs. Soon enough, sweat began pouring down his face, darkening the fabric around his neck and pits. His hands, clenching the railing grew clammy too.

Heaving great breathes, with one final step Namjoon had beaten the stairs.

Taehyung watched on, as his newest client struggled and sweated his way up to the second level, taking solid minutes where as it took him seconds to climb to the top.

“Would you like to sit down?” Taehyung called out hesitantly, not wanting to offend his customer.

“Y-Yes please…” Namjoon wheezed. This was the most exercise he’d had in years, his residence being only one floor.

“Ah!” Taehyung lead him only a few more feet until he was in front of a lovely black denim armchair. “Here, you can take a seat and see how you like this one.”

Namjoon looked up already loving the design of the chair. It would go well with his home décor for sure. “Sure… Just… Gimme a second.” He turned around carefully so that his huge ass faced the armchair, and tried to gracefully lower himself onto the seat.

Predictably, his leg muscles gave out and he slammed his ass onto the cushion.

The thing creaked ominously for a few seconds before quieting down.

Success!

Unfortunately, Namjoon and Taehyung realized at the same time, the chair was way too small for him.

Namjoon’s belly flab overflowed the armrests and his rear was securely wedged into the seat. It was going to take more than just Namjoon to get him off of the chair.

Face bright red, Namjoon coughed lightly to grab Taehyung’s attention. “Ugh, I think I’ll need some help. Uhm, standing back up again. I’m a little stuck.”

Now it was Taehyung’s turn to flush red. Oh god this was the best and worst thing to ever happen to him. This man was awakening things in him that he never knew existed while simultaneously dooming him to forever jerk off to these unfortunate moments. He was totally going to hell.

“Of course! I’ll help you, lemme just…” Taehyung hesitated before reaching out to grab Namjoon’s fat hands. God his fingers were like sausages. “”Here, on three you try to stand and I’ll pull.”

One

Two

Three!

Taehyung had to utilize every muscle in his body to even attempt to lift the behemoth of a man in front of him. Namjoon was just so, fucking, heavy.

Namjoon on the other hand had to rediscover muscles he was pretty sure withered away years ago in order to heave himself up off of the stuck chair.

It took them in total, four tries to get poor Namjoon out of the chair. Both men were ridiculously red in the face, Namjoon from the effort and embarrassment and Taehyung from effort and arousal.

“Maybe not this one then…” Taehyung laughed awkwardly. “Maybe we should look at the armchair loveseat hybrids we sell here. They’re certainly wider than this tiny thing.” That tiny thing was the widest armchair they had in stock…

Namjoon was too out of breath to say anything, so he just nodded gratefully. Sweat dripped down his back and pooled in his crack.

“Would, would you like some help?” Taehyung took a risk and offered his arm to Namjoon. God this was weird, he was being so weird.

Namjoon grabbed Taehyung’s arm without hesitation though. “Thank you.” He panted.

This was the most exercise he'd gotten in ages. All he wanted was a damn chair!

“Okay then, let me show you the hybrids.”

Taehyung lead a very sweaty Namjoon about five yards away to see the hybrid chairs. Every swaying step of the obese young man brushed the side of his overhang against Taehyung’s own side. The feel of soft subcutaneous fat was glorious against his own body… Namjoon’s large jiggly breasts were at mouth height for Taehyung. He could very easily just lean and place his lips over-

“Are these it?” Namjoon asked suddenly, breaking Taehyung out of his titty trance.

“Ah! Yes! Yes, these are it.” Taehyung yelped. He tore himself away from Namjoon in order to go rush over to a particular chair. “Why don’t you try this one? It’s not leather and it has two cup holders, just how you wanted.”

Namjoon waddled his way on over to the chair and yet again, practically fell onto it.

-CRACK!-

The love seat armchair hybrid’s legs snapped, causing the entire chair to sink down significantly. Namjoon yelped as he felt himself lower to the floor than he felt comfortable being. Given that he couldn't remember the last time he lifted himself from the ground solo.

“I am so sorry!” Taehyung gasped as he ran over to Namjoon grabbing his hands and attempting to yank him up. “I f-forgot that his particular chair has a lower weight limit than the others.” That was a lie, it was the average limit of 400 pounds. That must mean that Namjoon was solidly over-

“I-It’s fine.” Namjoon stammered, shocked by the sudden fall. “I just need, uhm, help getting back up.”

He tried rocking himself to his feet, which was how he stood up from all his surfaces, but failed to get off of the chair. With Taehyung’s help though they managed to get Namjoon to a squatting position on the floor and then with a great heave from Taehyung and a weak push from Namjoon, they got him standing again.

God, having all that fat all over his front felt like paradise to Taehyung. He thought this all very guiltily feeling like he was taking advantage of his client. Ugh, he was such a terrible person.

“Again, I am so sorry about that.” Taehyung bowed. “I-I have others with a higher weight limit. I-If you just, uhm, over here…”

Namjoon took a deep breath and tried to shrug off his embarrassment. Besides, judging by the tent in Taehyung’s pants he saw when on the ground, it didn’t seem like Taehyung was disgusted by him…

“What other chairs do you have?”

There was only one left, one that tested okay at a limit of 750 pounds. Taehyung helped Namjoon over to it. Hopefully he wasn’t over 750 pounds…

A small part of Taehyung delighted at the thought of Namjoon breaking this one too. Bad Taehyung! Bad!

Namjoon fell back onto the newest chair with a groan, he wasn’t used to carrying his weight around for longer than 5 minutes at a time… All this shopping was so much work!

-Creeeeeaaaaaak…-

They both held their breath, waiting for something to happen, but nothing did!

Namjoon relaxed into the well fitting, non-collapsed chair. It was cozy and had cup holders like the last. Perfect for fitting his sodas and shakes into.

Taehyung’s shoulders dropped and he sighed in relief. If this chair didn’t work out, he didn’t have back up…

“This one actually also has a charging port for your phone.” He piped up, watching Namjoon’s fat sway as he got comfortable.

“I love that.” Namjoon smiled at Taehyung. “I think I’ll take it.”

Taehyung groaned internally. Thank god.

Time seemed to swim by as Taehyung helped Namjoon back down the stairs, to the register and then out the door.

“Thank you again for coming, we hope that you found everything you needed while at Kim’s Furnishings!” Taehyung said. “H-Here’s my card in case you have any issues with the delivery or wanted to inquire about further furniture.”

“Sweet.” Namjoon sighed, glad that this whole thing was over with. Well, there was one good thing that came out of all of this. “I’ll call you when I outgrow this chair too.”

The fucker winked at Taehyung.

Caught.

“There’s my car.” Namjoon pointed over to a large accessibility vehicle. “My driver’s waiting. I’ll see you later.”

“Later…” Taehyung mumbled as he watched Namjoon waddle away, back fat jiggling, ass swaying.

End.

[forgettable-au]

FORGETTABLE-AU (Page 61-64)

* I-I don't think we were talking about the same thing...

[BEGINNING] [PREVIOUS] [CONTINUE]

[sensitiveheartless]

[ddddd-pixels]

I know I did one of these already but she's literally a fighter what else was I supposed to do–

Poliwrath girl by @billfrancois.

[minhosblr]

Minho playing with kittens for 12 minutes straight (aka the kitten interview)

Bonus

[olasketches]

cutie patootie scrunchy face

[iknowicanbutwhy]

"I'm going to design my own Loop!" I thought. "It's going to be so fun!" I thought. "Surely modern clothing - that isn't just a hoodie and shorts or anything with jeans - is something easy to design!" I thought.

It was fun. But I am aware that all I wear are t-shirts and shorts.

^^^ extra little outfits. Glitter pants are super fun, alright? You ever wear swishy glittery pants? They're SO fun.

[cobaltfluff]

suuuuper late pocky day akeshus ;w;

[spacebubblehomebase]

Shit post!

Don't take this too seriously, but LMAO XD. -Bubbly💙

[peach-sea]

Incorrect quote

[artsymephy]

Hey so like I'm hyperfixating hard on the guide au with teen! Phillip so if you take requests can you please draw more of them?

Sorry it’s an old ask but on the bright side I made these today and had a lot of fun drawing them!!

Not very canon to the AU, but I still wanted to draw Teenlip being delusional and interacting with Hunter.

While I’m at it here are some other Guide AU drawings by Sopa that I think ya’ll will like.

[orionis13]

Monday motivation

[booplesnotts-art]

Hi! Could you draw Miss Peregrine??

It has been a MINUTE since I was in this fandom so hooo boy- I LOVED her when I was a kid lol

I tried to go more by the book description of her but idk how much I like it so here’s more of a doodle- hopefully it’s alright🖤

[stargirl230]

interlude

Lost focus and drew a consensual workplace relationship (the inherent intimacy of hanging out in an artist's studio to watch them exist in their element got to me)

Zoom in for details I poured my soul into <3

(no reposts; reblogs appreciated)

[claypigeonpottery]

shoutout to my wonderful studio friend Fire & Grace Pottery who made me 15 commissioned greenware mugs so I could decorate them

they all turned out so beautifully 😍

[ariqueery]

So a while ago I saw a post with the coolest vintage tshirt and I instantly fell in love and decided I needed it in my life:

I searched REALLY hard for the original copyright holder to see if I could buy one, including digging up the original source of the image (the Lesbian Herstory Archives) to find out that WMP stands for WomanMade Products, and eventually stumbled across a feminist bookstore with the same name. I called expecting to get the runaround for a week and then be told they couldn’t find the creator, but she actually picked up the phone herself! Becky Bly has been in business since 1976, created this design in the early 80s, and said as long as I wasn’t selling it, I could reproduce it!

I ended up having to redraw it by hand because the original scan was skewed (there was much wailing) and got to work. Ignore how sloppy the pattern is, I fixed most of it while stitching.

I then immediately put it down and forgot about it for weeks until I realized Pride was right around the corner and frantically picked it back up. I took it with me to a roller derby match to work on during the breaks and ladies, if you haul out embroidery that says “dyke” on it at roller derby, you will IMMEDIATELY have lots of queer women talking to you. This has been Ari’s Top Tips.

I then forgot about it for another week and a half until I realized Pride was in two days and started sewing as fast as I possibly could, bruising my finger where I braced the needle. I finished it at 1:30 am the night before Pride:

This is the best thing I’ve ever done. I am obsessed with it and keep staring at it. Everyone at Pride thought it was amazing and I got SO many compliments that went straight to my head. One person at temple asked if they could commission me to make one for them and I got to say “sorry :( I only got permission to make it for myself :(” instead of “the amount of labor that went into this is going to COST you, I don’t think you want to pay that much.”

Thanks again to Becky Bly for permission to reproduce this, I am going to use this bag until it falls apart and then probably make another one lol. Go check her out if you’re interested in her work!