#but I already did it okay
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A look in Jared Kleinmanās phone
#Iām not an artist this is for funsies ok? OK?#all the cat pics are from pictures of my kitty :3#the rest are stock photos or memes#except the big spill that was a pic of my coworker lmao <3#also featuring music from my library!#i was just gonna do one row of liked songs but there were two many good ones I couldnāt decide :/#Please ignore how fuzzy the lock screen is okay#i did the cat for the photos and then made it bigger and obv it got blurried but I just did not have it in me to redraw it#realized when assembling these pics that I probably didnāt need to make the first page of apps thatās justā¦ the regular ones#but I already did it okay#itās just a fun fact of how he organizes them (correctly) (like me)#anyway I am not an artiste but I love drawing littol details like apps and such#and coming up with snippets of text conversations#this has been in my drafts for a month heehee#Iām scared of Opinions :3#deh#š¦
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It's so funny that everyone immediately called Eddie gay for doing the Risky Business dance and he is but he also just beat for beat recreated what Tom Cruise did in Risky Business and. well.
#āryan did it sexier and betterā okay first of all tom is 19 here and is supposed to be a child dancing around his living room#furthermore. no. I love ryan but no. hope this helps.#itās not supposed to be sexy itās supposed to be freeing and awkward and funny youāre just attracted to a 37 year old over a 19 year old#Iām very glad youāre all more sexually attracted to the 37 year old over the 19 year old who looks 12 but donāt lie.#911 abc#Eddie Diaz#tom cruise#risky business#911 poasting#just as an aside: if you want to grasp how long tom cruise has been a movie starāthee movie star#he already had a star on the walk of fame by the time ryan guzman was born
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nĢµĶĢ
ĢĶĢĢĢ£Ģ±oĢ“ĢĢĶĶĢĢ®_Ģ“ĶĢĢ²sĢ·ĢĶĢĢĶ ĶiĢ¶ĢĶĢĢĢĢ£ĶĢgĢµĢĢĶĢ±ĢĢ£nĢ“Ķ ĶĢĢĢĢĢ°ĶĢĶĢ§aĢøĶĢĢĢ„Ģ©ĢlĢ¶ĶĶĶĶĢĶĢ£ĶĢ
#my art#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#jjk fanart#jujutsu kaisen fanart#gojo satoru#satoru gojo#geto suguru#satosugu#jjk gojo#eye strain/#eye horror/#like i said ik this concept has been done before and probably better than this but i hope that i did it Okay#i hope all the eye strain was not in vain gjhfgsh the amount of blue light in this image is not recommended by doctors#smh gojo ipad baby confirmed#too much screentime.png#in other news im happy i came up with smth else 2 put alongside the piece itself !!#was playing around with filters and effects and i was like ooh what does the binarization button do#makes it look like found footage is what it does i love it SO much#i almost like it better than the coloured version but i would rather die than let a day and a half of rendering go to waste#esp after i already scrapped the intended p2#still i would have posted the full b/w one side by side but it made the post look so busy and distracting and awful#so it's just geto's face ig smile :)#happy i stuck it out w this!!!#fr all i dunk on gojo gdi his aesthetic n design works so well with glitches and messed up technology#tb to tht other gojo + teal + glitches piece i did frever ago captioned smth like 'watch what you eat'#the glitch brushes in my inventory exist fr him and him alone
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should've just let Vil be the one to fly, it would've gone SO much easier. š
also HEY how are everyone else's pulls going, because I have had the most RIDICULOUS luck, seriously, halloween magic is 100% real
#art#twisted wonderland#twisted wonderland spoilers#lost in the book with nightmare before christmas#hajimari no halloween#kicking around some ideas for scully's UM poster so i'll talk about all that when we get to it#in the meantime i just have to show this off because...seriously look at it#is the halloween pickup count cumulative?! because i only did two ten-pulls for jamil...#i've only done three ten-pulls total in this event and yet somehow ended up with leona and two consecutive jamils#now it would be extremely funny if i didn't get sebek when he's the one i want the most...but let me hope#(i choose to believe this is an apology from the universe for my lack of both fairy gala ortho and masquerade malleus)#(thank you universe)#anyway i realize there is some irony in bragging about my jamil pulls and yet drawing vil instead#but...i just really wanted to draw nightmare vil okay#i thought i had posted art of good ol' pumpkin-stroker jamil already but i think i might actually have just dreamt that#brb gotta get onto fixing this problem
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I see your "Hannibal killing Will's surrogate daughter who lured and ate people (Hannibal's style of killing) the way lambs get slaughtered for food,"
and I raise you "Will killing Hannibal's surrogate son who hunted and mauled people (Will's style of killing) the way animals get mauled when they infringe on each other's territory."
Do you fold?
#it's details like this that make me feral#screaming crying shaking#hannibal#hannibal lecter#will graham#hannigram#all gods demand a sacrifice#did you think that you could change me the way i changed you#i already have#i'm not okay
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Drew this real quick because I fucking love these two so much ???? Especially Bee. I wish they interacted more so badly. PLEASE.
Also learning how to draw these guys.. slowly.
#IT WILL NEVER NOT BE FUNNY TO ME HOW DELIGHTED B GOT ??? FOR VIOLENCE?#the brainrotsreal's art tag ā§ĖĀ°:*ā”#like okay you have d17/megatron okay#d17 got consumed by vengeance. iconic of him. you SEE him grow more ruthless/ violent........AND THEN YOU HAVE B 127#he got knife hands for 0.00937 seconds and immediately KILLED PEOPLE SO EASILY IM SCREAMING SDJKJSDS#did by accident and then did it gleefully. AND SO WELL TOO LIKE ???? bro got that hunger for violence ig. got that delight.#i wish we got to see d17 and b127 interact more cause imagine b got his knife hands early and d17 was like.... alright start stabbing#and b127 is LONELY. mf is deprived of interaction and CLEARLY clingy. i see him telling d17 to stand down so he isn't hurt.#not necessarily because he has the SAME morals as orion/optimus#like look me in my eye. tell me if d17 didn't say something like āneeding an ally not a leaderā (friendship bait)#AND UR TELLING ME BEE WOULDN'T FOLD AND HELP HIM? HM? HMMMMMMMM?#like i feel like b's morals are mostly match whoever he's around. if he was around d-17 more? WELP? let's assassinate together bestie!#anyways optimus and elita gotta watch b fr cause mf is already an incredible ally on the battle field SDKJKDSS#like just tell him where to go and that place would DESTROYED. NO WITNESSEES LEFT. LIKE HELLO#transformers one my beloved#d 16#megatron#tf one#tf one megatron#tf one b 127#b 127#transformers one fanart#never know how many actual tags to use istg.#imagine being isolated for years and all that shit went down like what is going on in b's brain rn. mf got 3 friends and then lost one#SO QUICKLY
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Thanks for listening to my sad backstory. Anyway, here's Wonderwall.
[First]Ā PrevĀ <ā-> Next
#poorly drawn mdzs#mdzs#wei wuxian#lan xichen#lan wangji#madam lan#This normally would have been two separate comics but I felt like it was a far better joke to have them together.#Enjoy the rare double feature comic!#I was listening to this episode - scripting out and preparing for a longer and heartfelt comic on this scene.#And then Lan Xichen pulled out his flute and started playing unprompted.#I could not contain my laughter. I know it is trying to be emotionally resonate and the flute is pretty but...#It really does have the energy of āOkay thanks for listening to my tragedies and traumas. I don't know how to segue out of this.ā#This madam lan design is inspired by Qourmet's design! Really good stuff that I was not able to do more with in this one panel.#Speaking of...I know it is ambiguous on purpose and we are only told what happened through LXC's POV but...#I always interpreted madam lan's passing as a suicide. I think LXC was told it was illness to soften the blow.#She was stuck in a house with maybe a servant coming by to give her food. One day a month she saw her children.#Of course she was warm and loving in their memories-#She was trying to give them a version of her that would be remembered as such. She wanted to protect them from the truth.#She did her best but she was already dead a long time ago. She must have felt like a ghost haunting a house.#Love to her was waiting. And both her boys inherited that view of love.
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so that popularity poll huh
#ace attorney#thank you for the idea aroace attorney i hope i have done you justice š«”#haha justice. get it. like apollo#anyway#HES RLLY THIRD WHEELING LIKE THAT ITS SO FUNNY š#ace attorney shitpost#shitpost#gyakuten saiban#phoenix wright#beanix#miles edgeworth#apollo justice#CONGRATS GUYS!!! š„¹#beanix fans r WINNING today#also listen. i know someone else did this already#but i finished this before i saw theirs okay#let me have this i worked so hard#dolotalks#doloposts
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Old animatic from January! I decided to clean it up a little bit so I could post it instead of leaving it unfinished forever
I really like how it turned out tbh!! AAAA let me know what you all think hehehe
#AUGH IM GONNA FANGIRL HERE IN TAGS AUGHUGIUUAGH#I LOVE THIS AU SM#IFHSSFKSJHSVJE LOOK AT THEM#AND OH#THIS PART OF THIS SONG IS SOOOOO FITING AND AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA#OKAY YEAH#SO#You can kinda see which parts are new and which parts were already there#But uh#I did a LOT of cleanup#I still dont consider it finished but#it looks good to share now#and thats GREAT#CAUSE IVE BEEN DYING TO SHARE THIS#SINCE JANUARY AND THEN I FORGOT ABOUT IT#THE GOOD PART !!!IS THAT!!!!!NOW MORE PEOPLE WILL SEE IT!#OKAY TAGS#forgettable-au#undertale au#undertale#papyrus is gaster#gaster#papyrus#papyrus!gaster#sans#alphys#animatic#amv#undertale animatic
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#tommy: take eddie and DIE#buck: okay š„° yay š„°#911#911edit#buddie#buddieedit#evan buckley#eddie diaz#beets.gif#(i'm sure there's so much more i could have done w this but i still don't have the encyclopedic knowledge of this show i wish i did#and also it's already long enough so please accept this humble offering)
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Danny fake guardian angel au
You know how sometimes itās highlighted how you have to be very careful on what you say in the presence of a spirit because they can twist your words and end up bidding yourself to it?? well uno-reverse-card the spirit also has to be careful on what he says because when Danny had said he owed the dude one for coming to his rescue in a gala Vlad had dragged him to, he didnāt expect that to be taken literally.
danny: wait seriously?? i literally say that all the time!
cw: not after being crowned ghost king, you havenāt
danny: butābut I was also human when I said it. doesnāt that protect me or smth
cw: *shakes his head*
danny:
danny: omg this is a nightmare
cue timmyās brucequest period (cuz heās the guy) being so high strung and tired, he just wants some company, which is a so low stakes thing to want the deal Danny unintentionally goes sure we can do that and pulls him towards the guy, despite Timmy never outright saying he wants company. (tim always speaks in the sanctity of his own mind, not out loud)
So. random spirit manifesting. Tim going all who the fuck are u
and Danny panicking and saying your guardian angel
Tim not being impressed while Danny promptly blushes like a moron because that did not come off as he wanted it to.
Yes accidental dead tired where the dynamic goes from Tim trying to shake this probably demon that somehow latched to him being all like ??? dude leave me alone, and Danny being there like bitch iām trying
to
huh. im actually being protected by a spirit like he said he would. heās strangely an idiot but also heās overpowered and just never leaves my side which he says itās an angel obligation but I think itās bullshit but also hoping itās not because it appeals to my crippling fear of abandonment (anyways he really seems to take after those little cartoon angels that poof into your shoulder to keep from me doing wrong decisions) translate into my future boyfriend seems increasingly appalled to what i am up to
meanwhile danny
Bitch you better thank your god Iām dead because otherwise I would already been killed. I did not sign up for a assassins what the fuck I thought you were a normal civilian not a literal superhero and omg that is a fruitloop. no no back off you wrinkly raisin this is my emotional support idiot you canāt have him and what do you mean youāre messing with time whatever this way I can get back to clockworkā
#danny fenton#danny phantom#tim drake#dp x dc#batman#dc#dp x dc prompt#Dannyās obsession in this au is space not protection#but#just danny saying uh yeah sure Iām your guardian angel and having to commit to the bit#seeing this tired competent idiot and going sure i can protect him#not knowing tim is literal go big or go home in his increasingly unhinged fourty step plan#danny: i did not sign up for this#tim: literally leave I donāt care#(they say)#(they got attached)#itās so interesting to me because danny couldāve just duplicated and be invisible the whole time#it would take lots of energy but the deal was literally to just be company#be a presence#danny was the idiot that went yeah uh im a protector spirit#so uh imma protect u#tim at first: sounds fake but okay#also ANGST potential at first if Tim finds out Danny is stuck with him against his will#like this is my precious prettiest boy that is insecure that out of all the Robins he wasnāt chosen#so that is like a sore spot for him#he could find out Danny is stuck and out of spite lead a side mission to help him get rid of him#even if the feelings are already thereš#dead tired
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"My friend, my partnerā¦ my Guardian."
#destiny#destiny 2#destiny the game#the final shape#the final shape spoilers#tfs spoilers#destiny art#bungie#the young wolf#hunter guardian#d2 ghost#fanart#it has been... eight hours since i did the final mission and my eyes are still tearing up every now and then :')#the finale was perfect for alfa and zeta - absolute perfect#i often make up small changes in the actual canon to fit their personalities better - not this time#I CANT WRITE TAGS WITHOUT TEARING UP DAMMIT#to think i first created alfa as a 'what if i make my hunter like alfarid from arslan senki but as exo'#but then she took so much from me i began to appreciate this side of myself#and zeta... what a grumpy little light w a big heart he came to be#my comics will never make justice to what they mean to me but here we are#THERE'S A LOT TO UNPACK ABOUT THIS DLC BUT IM OBSESSING OVER GUARDIAN/GHOST OKAY#anyway lemme write the alt already while i choke on coffee#cayde def is now everyone's guardian angel -ba dum tss-
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i love listening to this take picturing paul doing his silly little things while the rest of the band looks exactly like this beside him
#refused to draw because i already did a maxwell hate art before#i hope it's okay that i post other things than fanarts here since my other blog doesn't have that many beatles mutuals#text#the beatles#maxwell's silver hammer#john lennon#paul mccartney#george harrison#ringo starr#Spotify
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who did this to you. part 2
š¤š· read part 1 here pre-s4, steve whump, protective (but scared) eddie
This is not happening. None of this is happening, heāsā¦ Heās dreaming. Heās high. High as a kite somewhere where reality doesnāt matter, where it canāt fucking reach him and heāsā Heās not panicking behind the wheel with Steve Fucking Harrington bleeding against the passenger side window.Ā
Itās not happening.Ā
Because if it were happening, Eddie would simply throw up. Heād leave his van on the side of the road and run the fuck away. Away from Harrington and his trouble, away from his rattling breath thatās so loud and unsteady, Eddie doesnāt even dare to turn on any sort of music, even though heās itching for it, his hands clenching and unclenching around the wheel until his knuckles go white.Ā
āShit, shit, shit,ā he mumbles under his breath, barely aware of his surroundings at all, his eyes flitting from Harrington to the red stain against the window, back to the road and then down to the white-knuckled grip and the speckles of dried blood that is decidedly not his.Ā
Lost in his panic and disbelief, Eddie almost runs a red light.Ā
Itās harsh, the way he hits the brakes, and the sound Harrington makes is pathetic enough that Eddie feels like maybe this might actually be happening.Ā
āSorry,ā he breathes, his voice no better than Steveās ā and heās not the one with a concussion, a broken rib, and thatā¦ fucking fear. Of something. Or someone.Ā
Whoās hurting you, Steve?Ā
Jusā everyone, sometimes. God you donātā¦ You donāt even know.
He doesnāt even know. He doesnāt wanna know. All he wants is for Harrington to stop fucking bleeding, to keep his eyes wide open andāĀ
āEd,ā the boy says, wheezes, and it sounds like he wanted to say his full name, but had to swallow first. Blood, Eddie thinks. Donāt let it be blood. āThink Iāmā¦ āM gonna throw up.ļæ½ļæ½ļæ½Ā
āPlease donāt throw up,ā Eddie says before he can stop himself, hating how small his voice sounds, how urgent ā like thatās the thing to be urgent about. God, heās such an ass, but heā¦ If Harrington throws up, Eddie will lose it. He knows he will.Ā
He chances a glance over at Steve, who has somehow managed to get his right arm tangled with the handle at the door, keeping himself upright and safe from Eddieās rather frantic driving style. His head is drooping, moving this way and that against the red-stained glass, and he blinks unseeingly as blood begins to trickle down from his nose and temple again.Ā
Heās making himself small, and Eddie wants to pull him upright and tell him to stay like that, tell him to stop looking so terrible, so horrible, soā¦Ā
So much like Eddieās fucking problem.Ā
He hates it. Hates everything about that vision. Boys like Harrington shouldnāt look like this, shouldnāt hold themselves like this, shouldnātā¦ Shouldnāt have no one but Eddie to take them somewhere safe.Ā
Itās just not tight.Ā
āDonā wanna throw up,ā Steve says at last, the pause too long for Eddieās liking, and he sounds so solemn about it, yet so helpless, and Eddie kinda wants to scream. Wants Harrington to scream. Anything to stay awake and maybe not ruin his car. Anything to not fucking die in it.Ā
āTell me something,ā he says then, because he knows he has to keep Harrington awake and speaking. Just for another ten, fifteen minutes, he tells himself. āAnything, yeah? Tell me anything. Gotta keep you awake there, you hear me? Sounds great, right, staying awake?āĀ
Heās rambling and he knows it, desperation shining through his words and the god-awful way his voice breaks a little. This is not about him, he knows it isnāt, but still he wants to punch himself, wants to pinch himself and stay fucking calm.Ā
But who could stay calm in a situation like this? The silence is filled with the horrible wheezing and rattling of Harringtonās breath barely audible over the engine, and Eddie has to look over several times to make sure heās still there, still with him, still alive. His panic spikes each time.Ā
Heās just about to reach over and shake him a little, snap in front of his face to get him back, whenā
āI donāt know what.āĀ
Itās quiet, that voice, breathy and tiny and almost invisible, and Eddie wants to scream again.Ā
Tell me why youāre so scared. Tell me why your old buddy did this to you. Hagan would never touch you, so why did he now? Tell me what happened to Hargrove. Tell me why you sound so fucking small.Ā
āTell me about yourā¦ā He fumbles for a moment, taking a sharp left and pretending not to hear the choked-off whimper. Focusing on good things. On normal things. āYour favourite person.āĀ
Eddie cringes at himself the moment the words leave his mouth. Your favourite person? Really, Munson? He scrambles to find something better, something cooler, or maybe something easier like asking his favourite fucking colour, but the overthinking really doesnāt mix well with the already panicked state of his mind. And Eddie just blanks.Ā
Beside him, though, Harrington sits up a little straighter, smearing more blood against his window in the process that Eddie pretends not to feel nauseous about.Ā
God, he never did like blood.Ā
āYou wanā me to tell you ābout Rob?āĀ
āSure, yeah,ā Eddie says, a little too loud, a little too shrill, actually running a red light this time because he doesnāt want to brake again and hurt the boy some more. Thereās no one around anyway. This is Hawkins. Fucking dead-end of a town. It doesnāt need red lights, or boys who look like Harrington. āRob. Tell me ābout him, whatās he like? Favourite colour, all that shit.āĀ
āHer.āĀ
Eddie blinks, looking over to find Harrington looking at him ā or trying to, his eyes still drooping and empty. But itās a good sign. People donāt die when they look at you, right?Ā
āWhat?āĀ
āHer,ā Harrington says again. āAnā blue. Deep ānā dark blue. Sheāll say something corny when, when you ask her, jusā to fuck with you. Sunset gold or rose, jusā to mess withā¦ But is blue.ā
Eddie doesnāt really listen, doesnāt really process what Steve is saying, already thinking of the next question just to keep him talking. But then he continues on his own.Ā
āMorninā blue depā deā¦ makes her sad, though. So only dark blue. Says itās why weāre friends. Youāre so blue, Stevie. Got halfāa my clothes, still, she does. All the blues.āĀ
That's... really fucking endearing, actually.Ā
And he says it with a half-smile, too, bloody and pathetic as it is. Like itās a secret that only the two of them are in on, only Steve and Robin. Itās kind of sweet.Ā
Not for the first time today does Eddie find himself wondering, Who the hell are you, Steve Harrington?
He exhales through his nose, ignoring the way heās started to shake with all that panic thatās been sitting inside him for a little too long now with no way to let it out.Ā
āNot much longer,ā he mumbles under his breath again, or maybe he just thinks very hard. Maybe he doesnāt know where he is at all. Itās like he blanks every few seconds, too busy thinking and trying not to.
Before he can tell Harrington to talk some more about that girlfriend of his, thereās a pained, confused little whine that forcefully tears Eddieās eyes from the street for a moment only to meet hazel eyes widened in confusion.Ā
āWhā Whereā¦ Whereāre we going?āĀ
Oh no.Ā
āWhyām I in yāāĀ
āYouāre safe,ā Eddie interrupts him, speaking slowly because suddenly his tongue is too big for his mouth, and not entirely sure if heās reassuring Harrington or himself. āYouāre hurt, okay? Itās bad, but it wasnāt me. Iām taking you toā¦ to someone. My uncle Wayne, heāsā He knows about that kinda stuff. You were telling me about Rob. Remember her, Blue? How about you tell me some more, hm?āĀ
Eddieās voice is unsteady with worry and fear and panic, and heās doing a piss-poor job at hiding it. The thing is, heās going to cry. Heās actually, absolutely, no-doubt-about-it going to scream and cry and punch a fucking hole into something when this day is over, when his van is no longer bloody, and when Steve Harrington wonāt have reason to look at him any longer.Ā
Oh, how he wants to skip forward. Past the nausea, past the fear, past everything thatās happening right now. Maybe past the insomnia that will come with a day like this, too.Ā
Past all of it.Ā
Or better yet, travel back in time and never get to that fucking boat house.Ā
But he canāt. So he breathes.Ā
At first, through the ringing in his ears and the racing of his own heart so loud and so forceful heās shaking with it, he worries that Steveās gone silent again, that heās gonna ask again, ask what happened, ask where he is, ask all the questions that make Eddie feel like heās been doused in ice water because theyāre questions that only get asked in stupid movies where terrible things happen to people.Ā
But then he hears him mumbling something. Numbers.Ā
āWhatācha mumbling there, Blue?āĀ
āāS her number,ā Steve says, his voice slurring again, worse than before, and Eddie hits the gas a little harder. āāS jusā her number. Robbieās number.āĀ
And he mumbles again. Over and over and over, until Eddie couldnāt forget it if he wanted to, ingrained into the frayed edges of his mind now.Ā
He lets him ramble, lets him repeat the number until the words slur together and he canāt separate a four from a nine anymore. Each time Harrington hesitates, each time he stumbles over the words or forgets a digit, Eddie wants to punch the wheel.Ā
He doesnāt. He only grips it tighter and counts down the turns he takes, the streets he passes, the fucking trees that are familiar, before, finally, the trailer park comes into view.Ā
The sob Eddie lets out when, with shaking, trembling hands he pulls up to his home to find his uncle having a smoke outside is deafening to his ears after the quiet weakness of Harringtonās voice.Ā
It startles him, makes him stop his rambles and sit up straighter when Eddie finally kills the engine. For a moment, without the steady, rolling hum, the car is filled with the small, tiny whines Steve makes on each exhale. Like it hurts to even breathe.Ā
āWhaās wrong?ā He asks, but Eddie canāt really hear him. Canāt turn to him, canātā āEddie?āĀ
Heās out of the car before he can take hold of another thought, stumbling out of his open door on legs that feel numb and heavy. The urge to cry is back again, the burning in his eyes only getting worse when Wayne takes in the dried blood on his clothes and hands with careful, calculated worry.
āEd?āĀ
āI didnāt know whatā whereā- Iāmā¦ Wayne, Iām sorry.āĀ
āSlow down, kid,ā Wayne says, raising his hands as if to calm a spooked deer. Like Eddie is the one who needs his help. And he is. He really, really is, and he shouldnāt be, because this isnāt about him, butā
Wayne grabs him by the shoulders to keep him still, and only now does Eddie realise heās shaking again, restlessly moving his weight from one leg to the other. His uncle steadies him, gently pressing down on his shoulders to ground him, and Eddie nearly sobs again.Ā
āEd. Are you in trouble?āĀ
āNo,ā Eddie scrambles to say, becoming aware of what this looks like, hiding his hands behind his back on instinct, like thatāll make Harringtonās blood disappear. āāS not my blood, I didnāt do anything, I swear! I swear. Itās, uh. I just found him. In the boathouse, I found him, and he wasā¦ God, he looked so bad, okay, but he didnāt want the hospital, and he was, like, so scared of something, and we donāt even talk, we donāt even look at each other, but I justā¦ I didnāt know what to do, and you know something about concussions and people who were beat to shit and, again, IāmāāĀ
āEddie,ā Wayne says, his voice so calm but so assertive that Eddie shuts up immediately, gladly handing over to controls to his uncle now. āWhoās the kid?āĀ
He nods towards Eddieās van, where Harrington looks to be halfway unbuckled, but his eyes are closed and his face smushed against the door again, like he just gave up. Ā
āShit,ā Eddie says, adrenaline and panic slowly falling from him with Wayneās hand on his shoulder. He sags into his uncle and rubs at his face. āItās Steve. Uh, Steve Harrington, I mean.āĀ
āOkay,ā Wayne says, and heās so calm. So calm. Eddie feels like heās about to fall apart, and Wayne is the only one keeping him together, with thatād steady, warm hand on his shoulder. āAnd you promise me he didnāt give you trouble? Or anyone else whoāll come finish what they started?āĀ
Eddie shakes his head profusely, getting a little dizzy with it. āI promise Iām not in trouble. He said Hagan did this to him, was alone when I found him. No trouble, Wayne, I swear, Iām not like that, you know Iām not.ā
āOkay,ā Wayne says again, and Eddie wants to weep. āI know youāre not like that, but some people are, yāknow? You did good, son. You did good. Now help me get him out of that car.āĀ
It takes his uncle tugging him towards the van for Eddie to kick back into motion, nearly falling over his feet turning back around. Itās only Wayneās āEasyā murmured under his breath that keeps the ground from opening up and swallowing him whole.Ā
He climbs in on the driverās side while Wayne rounds the car and gets to Harringtonās side.Ā
āHey there, Blue,ā Eddie says, his voice shaking and the nickname slipping again ā but itās easier to call him that than his real name, itās easier to pretend itās literally anyone else in here with him, bleeding against his door.Ā
Itās easier to pretend itās not Harringtonās breath rattling the way it does, easier to pretend those pained groans so high in their cadence they can only count as whines donāt come from Hawkins Highās Golden Boy who graduated a few months ago and was supposed to be done with bullshit like this.Ā
āCome on, up you get,ā he tells him, not daring to raise his voice too much.Ā
He looks so frail. Like heās already broken. Or like heās trying not to. Like heās holding on.Ā
Eddie pretends not to think that the hand he places on Steveās cheek to gently pry him from the window is not the only thing keeping that boy together right now.Ā
Harrington groans, whines, wheezes, but opens his eyes to meet Eddieās. Jesus, weāre they this blown before? Or this swollen?
āHey,ā Eddie says, just to say something. Just so he wonāt have to hold the boyās face in silence, just so he wonāt have to focus on all the blood. Just so he wonāt have to hear more questions that people arenāt supposed to ask.Ā
Steve opens his mouth, his breath coming out a little sharper, like he wants to say Hi rather than Where am I? or When will it stop hurting? Like he wants to say How can I help you help me?Ā
Somehow, Eddie manages a smile.Ā
Wayne chooses that moment to open the door ā just unclicking it, not pulling yet; giving Eddie enough time to support Harrington, make sure he doesnāt fall.
āCareful,ā he whispers, though whether itās for Wayne, for Steve, or for himself, he canāt quite tell. Maybe itās a plea to the rest of the world, and to anyone else who will listen.Ā
Steve is still staring at him. Thatās probably not a good sign. He leans back a little, turning Steveās head to make him follow him. Slowly, of course. Gently. Eddie canāt remember ever having touched something like it was going to break if only he looked at it wrong, but somehow heās hyper-aware of it now.Ā
Because Harrington is staring at him. Entirely too still, like he has no strength, no coordination to do anything but stare. And yet Eddie is the one who, now that the adrenaline has fallen from him, now that he can let someone else take over, now that Harrington doesnāt need him anymore, finds himself unable to look away.Ā
Because Steve is just a boy. And so is Eddie, who can feel Steveās breath against his wrist. And maybe, out of the two of them, Eddie is the fragile one. The one about to break.Ā
āBlue, you with me?ā
Steve nods. Doesnāt speak again. Doesnāt move. Eddie swallows, briefly looking back down at Wayne to see if heās ready. His uncle nods, ready to catch Harrington should he go down, and Eddie turns back to the boy whoās smeared with his own blood.
āIām gonna take off your seatbelt now, yeah?ā he tells him, not entirely recognising his voice anymore. āThat man out there, that is Wayne. My uncle. Heās safe. Heāll take care of you, okay?āĀ
āSafe,ā Steve breathes, and that shouldnāt be the one thing he focuses on. It shouldnāt sound so unsure. So insecure. So hopeful, so relieved, soā Fucking earnest.Ā
Swallowing all these thoughts, all this desperation and all those questions, Eddie reaches over Steve, one hand still supporting his head and feeling the overheated skin of Harringtonās cheek against his palm, the hint of stubble and the crust of dried blood. As if in slow motion, not daring to make a wrong move and hurt him more than he already does, Eddie frees him the rest of the way, letting the seatbelt slide into its hold behind his shoulder.Ā
āCareful,ā he says again, just to say anything, but he is careful, and his hold on Steve is steady.Ā
āāM careful. Not gonna break, Eddie.āĀ
āI know.ā But maybe I will.Ā
āGood. āCauseā¦ Donā wanna break.āĀ
Eddie smiles, despite everything. āYouāre not gonna break, Blue. Wayneāll catch you.āĀ
Harrington loses his focus then, his eyes glazing over, but the small smile on his lips widens. āBlue. āS nice.āĀ
Yeah, Eddie thinks. He kinda is.Ā
Somehow, miraculously, they get Harrington out of the van and into the trailer. He throws up halfway to the doorstep, and Eddie curses under his breath while Wayne talks quietly, asking him yes and no questions that Eddie canāt really hear through the ringing in his ears ā a strange mix of fear and relief, a panic not quite over, but soothed by his uncleās familiar voice; even if itās not directed at him.
āDonāt worry about it, kid, the next raināll take care of that. Stop apologising.āĀ
It throws him then, rather suddenly and violently, watching Wayne supporting Harrington, watching the blood smeared boy with the swelling, angry red bruises in his face. Somehow itās different, seeing him in his home.Ā
This was always a safe space. Always void of everything terrible.Ā
And now thereās a broken boy on his doorstep whoās not Eddie.Ā
He remembers the fear, the panic, the plea for no hospital, Eddie. Canāt go there.
Why not? You need a doctorā
Monsters. Only monsters there.
It paralyses him and he stays where he is, holding the door with an arm thatās heavy like lead, standing on legs that begin to go numb again. He watches, but not really, as Wayne sits Harrington down on the living room couch, between magazines and brochures and some of Eddieās calculus notes from last night that he was searching for a sketch of a monster he was so certain heād drawn in the margins a few weeks back.Ā
Now thereās blood on his calculus notes. And Eddie is helplessly keeping the door open as though heās going to run away any second now. Letting in more trouble to join Harrington on his couch.Ā
He shouldā¦ He should close the door. Help. Run. Disappear.Ā
āEd,ā Wayne calls, snapping him out of his stupor. āThe first aid kit, please. A bottle of water. A clean, wet cloth. A blanket, too.āĀ
Wayne talks him through it, takes it one step at a time, has Eddie bring him one after the other like he knows how much heās keeping his nephew together by keeping him on the brink of usefulness.
Soon, Wayne has everything he needs, taking care of Harrington and his wounds, keeping him awake and talking so much better than Eddie did, even making him smile here and there, hiding his wince when the motion pulls on his split lip or the huffed breath sends a jolt of pain through his rib that Eddie is absolutely certain must be broken with the way he holds himself ā with the way he lets Wayne hold him up.Ā
Wayne is doing his thing and Eddie is hiding, gripping the kitchen counter like a vice, staring both unseeingly and hyper-vigilantly as exhaustion washes over him, dragging him under and draining him of more than adrenaline. He slumps against the cupboard behind him, rubbing at his face like thatāll make it all go away.Ā
Itās not right. Itās not. This is Eddieās home, itās supposed to be safe, itās notā¦Ā
He breaks away, ripping his hands from the counter and all but stumbling outside, heaving a deep breath and giving in to the urge to cry. Tears spring to his eyes and he wipes them away angrily, because itās dumb, itās so stupid, itās absolutely fucking insane that he should be so worked up when Harrington talked about dying earlier.Ā
These things donāt happen. They donāt!Ā
āStop fucking crying,ā Eddie grumbles, sniffling and wiping away more tears as he closes his eyes against the afternoon sun. āGet a grip, Munson, Jesus Christ, thereās no reason to cry you big fuckinā baby.āĀ
Nobodyās there to contradict him. Nobodyās there to make it worse. So he lets his eyes sting for a while, lets his lips wobble, his jaw clenched shut, the balls of his hands pressing into his eyes, breathing deliberately.Ā
In. Hold. Out. Hold.Ā
He doesnāt even scream. Doesnāt punch the still bloody side of his van, doesnāt run into the woods and disappear into the void.Ā
He simply breathes. Tries not to think about boys dying in mall fires, and even less so about boys beaten and abandoned in boat houses.
Doesnāt think about fucking Hawkins in Bumfuck-Indiana and the cursed way it has, driving its people mad.Ā
Doesnāt think about, They said my brain is hurt, Eddie. Doesnāt think about the Monsters Harrington mentioned. Doesnāt think about Blue, doesnāt think about Iām tired, Eddie. Donāt wanna hurt anymore.Ā
Doesnāt think about blue, blue, blue.Ā
Heās shaking when he comes back inside. Heās shaking when Harrington meets his eyes, looking a little clearer now, the blood washed away and everything bandaged a lot better than Eddie managed. Heāa bundled in Eddieās blanket. Itās wrong. Itās so, so wrong.Ā
Eddie canāt move, and neither does Steve.Ā
āSteve,ā Wayne says, waiting until those eyes tear themselves away from Eddie and back to him, though Eddie sees them fill with such trepidation, he almost asks whatās wrong. āI wonāt hear a no on this, and I wonāt let you go home. Iām taking you to the hospital. Especially if you tell me your head was hurt like this before, more times than one.āĀ
āThree,ā Blue breathes, a little dazed still. Not magically healed, not even from Wayne. Another thing that doesnāt feel right.Ā
āThree times,ā Wayne says, nodding, like heās encouraging Steve to continue.Ā
āBut I donāt want a hospital.ā Again with that tiny fucking voice. Like the Monsters are hiding under hospital beds.Ā
āI know, son,ā Wayne sighs, tugging the blanket a little tighter around Steve, and Eddieās eyes begin to sting again when he notices the tone Wayne uses. When he realises. When he remembers.Ā
āI want my mom.āĀ
āI know, son. But sheās not coming. Your mama is gone, Ed, and this is your home now. Think we can make that work, hm? You and I?āĀ
Eddie had never felt so lost as he did then, clutching his blanket to his chest, burying his face in the wet fabric even as this man ā his uncle ā tugs it tighter around him. Like he is fine with Eddie wanting to hide as long as he doesnāt run away.Ā
He had shrugged, then, even though we wanted to shake his head, tell him no, tell him he wanted his mama.Ā
āIām scared, uncle Wayne.āĀ
And Wayne had smiled a little, and nodded. āThen we do it scared, Eddie.ā
Actually, Eddie feels like he never stopped doing it scared.Ā
And now there is Steve, who Eddie never believed knew what being scared felt like. Itās dumb, of course, because even Harrington is just a boy, but he was always untouchable to Eddie. They never talked. They never existed in the same space together, not in a good way and not in a bad way. Their worlds just never aligned, never collided, never coexisted.Ā
And nowā¦Ā
āIāll tell you whatās going to happen, okay? Thereās a doctor, Doctor Clarke. Likeā Yeah, like your science teacher, remember him? āS got a brother whoās just as much of a genius, and just as kind. Heāll take a look at you, yeah? Make sure your brain isnāt too hurt, clean your wounds, give you something for the pain. He wonāt, uh. He wonāt hurt you, kid. Whateverās got you so scared, Dr Clarke will be nice to you. Especially when Iām there with ya, Iām an old pal of his. And I will be. Wonāt let you outta my sight until youāre well enough to run away from me, you hear me, kid?āĀ
Eddieās hands are hurting, his fingertips raw from where heās been biting his nails while Wayne talks Blue through whatās going to happen ā and he wonders, with the way Steveās eyes are glued to Wayne, if he ever had anyone talking him through shit like this.Ā
āOkay,ā Harrington breathes at last, still sounding way too small. āBut. Iāmā¦āĀ
āScared anyway?ā Wayne offers. Steve nods. Youāre so blue, Stevie. āThen we do it scared anyway.ā
And they do. Wayne goes to get the car so Steve wonāt have to walk too far, leaving Eddie alone with him for a brief moment.Ā
He watches, from his place in the kitchen, how Steveās face falls into a look of utter exhaustion and tiredness; the adrenaline washing from him just the same. Eddie wants to reach out. Wants to say something, break the spell of tension and silence and I know we donāt talk, but Iām glad youāre doing a little better. Iām glad youāll go see a doctor. Iām glad you havenāt died, I guess. Do you really think you will? Are you really so scared of that?Ā
But Eddie keeps biting his nails, and Steve keeps his eyes closed, blanket around his shoulders. And they donāt talk.Ā
āThank you.āĀ
Eddie perks up, not entirely sure he didnāt imagine the words ā but Harrington moved slightly, his eyes still closed but his face now turned towards Eddie.Ā
āFor, uh. This.āĀ
āI didnāt do shit, Blue,ā Eddie says. āThat was all Wayne. All I did was freak out, I promise.āĀ
Harrington shakes his head, though, slowly. āMh-mm.āĀ
Eddieās mouth snaps shut, because there is no room for discussion here. They donāt talk. And he doesnāt want the bubble to burst with insecurity and sourness.Ā
āThank you,ā he says again, and he sounds final about it. It makes Eddie wonder what heās like, really like, when he doesnāt consist of pain and nausea and disorientation.Ā
He has a feeling that, despite everything, despite Monsters under hospital beds and torture in boathouses and mall fires that kill teenagers, Blue Harrington might be someone good to talk to. Compassionate as shit, even when all he wants to do is pass out.Ā
āYouāre welcome,ā Eddie rasps, pretending that his eyes donāt sting.
He wraps his arms around his chest like heās hugging himself, or like heās holding himself back. From reaching out, from asking, from telling, from talking.Ā
Unwittingly, even with his eyes closed, Steve mirrors him, and Eddie wonders if he, too, it holding himself back, or just curling in on himself some more even though it must hurt, feeling so small.Ā
Maybe thatās what fear of death does to a nineteen year-old. Itās so fucked up. Eddie wants to scream again.Ā
Outside, he hears a car door fall shut just before Wayne reappears in the door, giving Eddie some kind of meaningful look that he wouldnāt mind deciphering on any other day, but today he fears he needs words.Ā
āI donāt know how long thisāll take. Will you be okay, Ed?āĀ
āWill I beā Yes! Iām not the one with the concussion, man, of course Iāll beāāĀ
Itās a bluff, comes too fast, and Wayne sees right through it before Eddie even realises it, and he steps closer. A warm hand on his shoulder. His eyes stinging again.Ā
āYou did good, kid. Everything will be fine. But it might take a while. Itās fine if you need to go somewhere, justā¦ Donāt drive. Call Jeff if you need someone, just. Donāt do anything stupid. And donāt get behind the wheel. Deal?āĀ
Eddie swallows hard, hit by another desperate, aching wave of I wanna go back in time and skip this day. A wave of tired exhaustion and wondering, aimlessly, just who the fuck Steve Harrington really is.Ā
āDeal,ā he says, and Wayne pulls him into a hug.Ā
Eddie follows them outside then, trailing behind them like a lost little puppy, helping Harrington into Wayneās car. His movements are still slugged and a little disoriented, so Eddie decides to lean in again and fasten his seatbelt.Ā
āCareful,ā he mumbles, allowing the boy a momentās warning, a moment to adjust before the weight settles on his chest.Ā
DejĆ”-vĆ¹ hits him and makes him pause, with Harrington staring at him again.Ā
āIām careful,ā he says, the corners of his mouth tugging into a little smile.
More lucid than earlier, and Eddie thinks it that which takes his breath away for a moment.Ā
āNot gonna break, Eddie.āĀ
āI know,ā he says, still not moving back, instead reaching up to tighten the blanket around his shoulders even though the seatbelt is already there to hold it in place. āYouāre not gonna break, Blue.āĀ
The smile on those lips is genuine now, gentle enough to not be ruined by the blood crusting them.Ā
āThanks. Again.ā And then, when Eddie finally pulls away to close the door and tell Wayne to drive safely, āI really do like that name.ā
It soothes the urge to scream.
Eddie closes the door as gently as he can ā which isnāt much, because the car is old and not exactly smooth.Ā
āIāll see you later,ā he tells Wayne. Promises. To stay out of trouble, to stick around, to not run away for a while again, to stay out of his car.Ā
Wayne nods, a faint smile on his lips.Ā
āLater, Ed.āĀ
And then theyāre gone, and Eddie is untethered again. Wonders, for a few seconds every now and then if it really happened, if this is real.Ā
But it did. And it is.Ā
And after sitting on the steps for a while, having a smoke and staring at where Wayneās car disappeared ten, twenty, forty minutes ago, Eddie heads inside.Ā
He has a phone call to make.
š¤š· tagging: @theshippirate22 @mentallyundone @ledleaf @imfinereallyy @itsall-taken @simply-shin @romanticdestruction @temptingfatetakingnames @stevesbipanic @steddie-island @estrellami-1 @jackiemonroe5512 @emofratboy @writing-kiki @steviesummer @devondespresso @swimmingbirdrunningrock @dodger-chan @tellatoast @inkjette @weirdandabsurd42 (a thousand percent sure i missed some but oh well such is the 3am disease)
addendum 22 jan 24: onwards to part 3
#steddie#steddie fic#steddie fanfic#steve x eddie#steve harrington#eddie munson#steve harrington whump#this is so long i am SORRY#i hope tagging y'all was okay (and equally i'm hoping i missed nobody but also it is 3am)#who did this to you#most of y'all will know most of the beginning already maybe i should have split it up but i wanted y'all to have Something New too#and then the Something New got out of hand and oh well :(#dio words
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i just heard one of my favorite youtubers say this meme out loud in a video and the pronounciation FLOORED ME so now i gotta know:
poll is just "which way do you say it"; tags is "which way is right", assuming your answer to "which way is right" is different to "which way do you say it". or i guess tags are also for uhhhhhh if your answer is complicated and if you wanna explain, if you have a diff way of pronouncing (pls tell meeeee), or whatever else you want, im not your parents, idk
#i just.. diDNT THINK THERE WAS ANOTHER WAY TO PRONOUNCE IT???#but i heard [redacted pronounciation] and i just went ''pĆÅĘĆÅ???'' so i tried to think of all possible ones?#forgive me if theres already been a poll on this; i didnt see it and thus didnt know#edit: fuck!!! i just realizied you could combine the last two like i couldve made ''be o bo'' and ''bo be o'' each an option#if oNE OF THOSE TWO ARE THE MAJORITY (not that i expect many votes at all. but still!!) IMMA BE (1) SHOOK AND (2) McFUCKING BAFFLED#edit: wow. i thought id be lucky to get 20 in a week with my follower count. okay. damn. youre sweet ā” also ''Boo boo''s you are so valid#im sorry i did not think to add you as an option. you are so right
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'' We're taking it very slow. In fact I'm letting him set the pace, and I'm just trying to keep up . ''
#this is tommy trying to keep up with buck#yeah i'm loving that#did i already said tommy is perfect#okay i will say it again tommy is perfect#bucktommy#tommy kinard#evan buckley#911 buck#911 tommy#911 season 7#911#911 abc#evan buck buckley#tommy x buck#buck x tommy#tevan#buck#tommy
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