#but!!! i will say that the board doesnt seem to want to come very high off the ground even when i do my best

[lokh]

hand ollie....

[apartments4rent]

Apartments For Rent: TEN-YEAR RETROSPECTIVE

Ooooohhhh man, this… This is fucking me way up, big time… I don’t even know where to begin with this… I should definitely be using this free time I have today doing my homework, you know, the thing with a hard deadline? That was technically due yesterday?? Well, how about instead of that, I take a walk down memory lane…

Do you remember the 21st night of September? 

Picture this: It’s 2013. It is your sophomore year of high school. You have more friends than you ever have in your life and they are all so wonderful to you (this wouldn’t always be the case and they all wouldn’t stick around but you didn't know that yet). One of you proposes the question: If you were a monster, what would you be? A witch. A vampire. A werewolf. A mermaid. A ghost. A selkie. A dullahan. (You had to look those last two up.) You are so inspired by this that you want to make a story for these ideas to live in. You create a fantasy. Where all your best friends get to live together under one roof. A slice of a life you know you’ll never have. It’s actually the 20th night of September that you created the tumblr blog where most of what comes out of this will live (your first post says “why do i do this to myself”) but it is the 21st night that your creations get their names. Their genders don’t all stay the same but their cores haven’t really changed. “a very dramatic/theatrical witch who loves animals and sass master. a bubbly and happy mermaid who gets really scary when u cross her. a passive, nerdy vampire who isnt so out spoken. a moody selkie who loves to learn and lost her seal skin. a strong beautiful fairy girl who doesnt take shit from no one but is v nice to her friends. a ghost girl from the 1920s who is forgetful and not really confident but really likes her new friends.” You put a disclaimer at the bottom of the post, clarifying that these descriptions shouldn’t be taken as a description of your friends but separate characters entirely. This is also the birth of Marvin, the human man created to navigate this world of chaos, not based on anyone you know in real life. The straight man in this goofball circus. Your Original Character. (Who, you now realize, was designed as the boring main male character in the harem anime.) This was the genesis. And you would never know peace in your life ever since. 

And then what happened?

Bro, so much. A lot can happen in 10 years. You develop the characters further. You make a small town for them to live in (even though you’ve never even been to a small town in your life). You make (bad) art. You make sims because you hate the way you draw but you need a physical version of them to exist outside your head, as you see them. You apparently make a rule where no one outside of your little group is supposed to know about these characters (because you “had an experience” and “don’t wanna repeat it”). You make Alternate Universes for these Alternate Universe selves to populate, again and again. (As of right now, your “AU of an AU” list stands at 26 but there are probably more dumb ones not yet counted on the doc you made.) You try to make a one-shot comic collaboration with all your friends but no one seems to agree on how it should go so nothing but a script and panel formatting ends up getting made. (You know that your script was worse with many unnecessary details but you were bad at killing your darlings and stubborn about your ideas being the best. You’ll learn eventually.) You love and appreciate all the things your friends make for this story you start to feel full ownership of. (You haven’t noticed yet how much of a control freak you are.) Their writing and art give you life, especially considering they are doing The Most while you mostly just come up with ideas. The setting goes from apartment building to boarding house and back again before a year has passed. The first anniversary is a blast! You actually wrote something! And drew something you were proud of! Others wrote and drew and it was great. (How would you know it would never be like this again?) 

And the years go by and by… 

After the first year, you decided you wanted to make a dating sim with these silly characters because you just loved them so much. You shipped the characters (not realizing that your friends did it as a way to express they had crushes on each other, conveniently shipping your self-insert with the only man/only character not based on a friend.) There were still a lot of headcanons being made and posts being shared. But noticeably less and less. Then the second anniversary hit. Not much fanfare. After the second year, more characters started popping up based on more friends you make. Some of the friends that were there in the beginning weren’t anymore and you try not to think about it. After all, these characters aren’t your friends, they are separate and distinct from them. So it’s still OK to play with them, right? (The answer must be yes; ten years later you still do.) Then the third anniversary happens, with 4 posts between them. It was understandable. That was your senior year of high school. Everyone was getting ready to go their separate ways. You were moving clear across the country. Your friend group was getting smaller still and this big shake-up would prove who would stick around to still be a part of this thing and who would remain a memory for you to look back on in ten years. 2017, though, was a big year for the blog. You were unemployed and not yet going to college so you had A LOT of free time on your hands. It was probably the most number of posts you made since the first year of the blog. It was magic. Then you got a job. There have been 16 posts in the last 6 years. 2019 had none. 2020 and 2021 had one each. They were all made by you. There has certainly been less activity on the blog but that doesn’t mean these kids have been lying dormant all this time. You haven’t stopped thinking about them since they first popped up into your head. In 2019, you rewrote the story you had written for one of those anniversaries; the first chronological beat. (You haven’t read it since then; You have no idea if it’s good or not.)  In 2020, you attempted to write the actual story (like fr fr) for NaNoWriMo -- you didn’t get very far but it’s the thought that counts? 2021 was a quiet year as far as actual writing goes - as was 2022 - but trust that your brain definitely didn’t forget about them. 

The Retro part of the Spective 

Alright, enough second-person POV. 

Ten years.

Ten years. 

Talk about hard pills to swallow (thanks FOB). 

I’ve had this “story”, these characters, banging around in my head for ten years and what do I have to show for it? A couple thousand words and a blog full of half-thought ideas? Around this time last year, I was excited about this anniversary. I made a new Twitter for it (before that died) and was planning on actually publishing something to do this story justice… and I chickened out. I convinced myself, once again, that I wasn’t ready. That other things were more important, they took precedence. Do I have even that much to prove I was right? No, I don’t because I really haven’t changed all that much in ten years, if you can believe it. I know, a real shocker. (I still like all the same things I liked back in high school for crying out fucking loud!) I wanted to reach out to the people I used to do this with, to see if they still wanted to be part of it. (I’m sure that wouldn’tve been at all hard, I wonder why I didn’t follow through?) I wanted to have something so I would be able to say, “I did it.” So that maybe, I could finally move on. But that’s the thing, isn’t it… I don’t want to move on. I’m stuck in this arrested development because I refuse to change, to give up any past part of myself. Because if I don’t have that, I don’t know who I am. 

So now what? What’s all this for? One big, sad diary entry reflecting on the parts of myself that I already know very well? 

Honestly, I don’t know. I was hoping I could come to some sort of conclusion by writing this but as it turns out, it only made me want to cry. 

I wanted this to end on a good note.

I spent all day writing this, I can’t end it like this.

So let’s instead talk about all the things that have changed about these goofballs over the years:

Mystic Cove is a city in a Northern California town. It started out in Florida, it almost ended up as a mountain town. I also briefly considered straight up placing it in San Diego because there are some nice, beautiful, old-ass buildings downtown that juxtapose the cold, sleek skyrises in such a way that I thought about writing something about being lonely in a city and finding your own family. 

Vast Acres has been an apartment building, a boarding house, Mediterranean Revival, Victorian, Queen Anne, even briefly considered a Bed and Breakfast. All I know is it has to be the place where this family gets together. At one point under the ownership and operation of Marvin’s dad Alejandro, it is now bequeathed to Marvin by a mysterious, freshly dead uncle/great uncle. 

Marvin is a wholeass person to me, in that he’s not completely knowable to even me anymore. Marvin is probably the person in Mystic Cove I know the BEST and that like doesn’t mean anything to me. Like yeah, I’ve written pages and pages and answered so many pointless questions about him but… I don’t know how else to describe him other than, “He’s an enigma.” The most significant thing about him that’s changed is I’m considering undeading his mom? Just because I feel like we’ve had enough dead mom media and it’s not something I can speak to truthfully. Briefly considered making her a runaway mom? But we’re still thinking about it. I think her name is Lily? 

Mel’s name went from Melinda to Melody because I decided Melinda was a weird name? And Mel likes music so I thought I would be clever. She went from “Marv’s sister” and side character to basically co-lead. Mel was even almost briefly considered as the real main character for a time when I thought to lean into its roots as a product of a high schooler’s imagination and go full YA coming-of-age adventure. It was actually the subject of my 2020 NaNo attempt. I decided against it because I loved Marv too much to push him to “supporting character” and if there’s something about me that’s developed, it’s that I don’t much care for YA books anymore. 

Amber is unsurprisingly my favorite because I’m a Leo. I think I finally decided on a backstory for her that I like and she’s not white anymore? Like, not fully anyway lmao. Before she was like, from someplace in England with like Spanish parents so like tan? But now we’ve decided that she’s from colonized Mexico and her father is a white devil. :) I’ll let you figure that one out. Over these ten years, I’ve grappled with the fact that an immortal is almost impossible to understand. I’ve gone back and forth on whether her immortality is on purpose or by accident or a curse or what. Honestly, I’m still thinking about it, I don’t know for sure what I’ll end up picking. Right now though, it is an involuntary immortality with her life being tied to her sister’s (yes, the cat). Details are fuzzy. I’d have to finish the main story first but if I were to make a spin-off, I would make a prequel story about Amber’s life because it is QUITE eventful. 

Lucas is a man now lmao. And so is Will. And they r gay. For each other. But that’s been that way from the beginning lol. I think Luc’s story had to do with self-worth and Will… Will didn’t have much going on in my mind. My instinct was to make him a himbo but Will has always been very smart in my head so I don’t think that will work? Dude’s beefy asf and mad respectful so perfect man tbh? No notes. 

Jenny’s been my way to try to break down the trope “Born Sexy Yesterday” because that’s just the kinda guy I am. No, but fr I think I was making a very infantilized version of Jenny initially and that’s why I shipped her with Mel in so many AUs?? I’m not against skewing Jenny younger to make that ship viable in canon but I don’t know if that’s the story I want to tell. I don’t think Jenny ever had a goal beyond “Get to the surface” which she gets when she makes her appearance in the story so?? Where do we go from here? Things to think about…

Rohen was fat (like a proper seal should be) before they lost their skin on the beach to some snot-nosed kid and became depressed. When they start healing on their depression journey, they start to gain weight again and it's a good thing. :) 

Everyone else I haven’t mentioned yet hasn’t changed much (ie. I haven’t thought about them much). It’s not that I have favorites (even though I just said that I did), it’s just that I basically go down a list whenever I think about these guys, and, due to my short attention span, I never make it all the way down the list. AND honestly, it’s probably for the best because looking back… there were WAAAY too many characters to keep track of ngl… Like it’s a slice-of-life thing, I know. Not every character has to be involved in every storyline but like… At some point, you have to draw a line at, “How many named characters with their own plotlines can I insert into this story?” YKWIM? Especially because at one point there was a whole roster of other people who lived in the apartment building when there were like 20 units. That was (rightly) reduced back down to just the core cast. 

You can pry Jonesy from my cold, dead hands, tho. He’s perfect. He can stay.

This post took me literally all day. 

I’m tired.

I don’t really expect anyone to read all this but if you are not me and you made it to the bottom, congratulations! You now know me on a much deeper level! :) I hope I can convince myself to buckle down and write, straight up. Maybe NaNo this year? No promises. I’m trying to apply for university this year and living situation issues might take precedence but such is life, right? 

Thank you.

I love you all.

For giving me this gift.

Even if you never intended to give it fully to me.

It’s mine now, bitches. >:) 

Here’s to 10 years! And many (but hopefully not too many) more…

Cheers. 🥂🍾

❤️

[bardicbird]

original bad kids gender hcs

- kristin: i think sometime along the line of high school she gets into the part of lesbianism where oftentimes you really feel this Disconnect from femininity. and this makes her a little confused. but she loves doing research on queer labels and such so i think she eventually settles on nonbinary or maybe demigirl ! i think once she had figured that out she’d use she/they pronouns :]

- adaine: idk i think adaine is definitely queer but she comes off as more cis to me. she likes learning about that stuff tho so she can be a better ally to her friends :] i think maybe at some point in her life she might experiment a little with gender expression. get some botched femininity going. idk. 

- gorgug: i think gorgug is simply existing. i don’t think he’s ever given any deep thought into gender and is just kind of like :] yeah whatever works sure. his parents probably taught him about some of that stuff bc they seem like the types to do that . i think gorgug just went oh thats nice okay and kept going. i think he primarily uses he/him bc it’s what he’s most used to but also i think he’d be cool with any pronouns !

- fabian: look. i don’t have much reasoning for this one. i really want to say he’s cis bc that makes the most sense story wise but also this boy just SCREAMS trans for some reason???? so yeah. he’s trans. its why he kind of cared so much about seeming impressive and masculine, and a small part of why he tries to follow in his dads footsteps as much as he can. i think his dad was very supportive in a really weird way where he was like “AYE I KNEW A BABY WITH GRIP THAT STRONG HAD TO BE A STRAPPING LITTLE LAD. AW YER TAKIN AFTER YER OLD DAD ARENT YA IM SO PROUD OF YOU” or something akin to that. i think he has also probably already had top surgery which. would be VERY young in our world but i dont think bill gives a shit and could totally pay someone enough to do that. also surgery is probably safer and maybe even reversible in their magic world so ! 

- riz: honestly i think he’s pretty similar to gorgug except the first time he actually tried to think about it he got super worked up over it and ended up making a whole board trying to connect things together to make sense of his own identity and then after like. hours of hyperfixating on it he was just like “im so tired. i need to not do this anymore.” and went to sleep and never tried touching the subject again. pronoun wise i think he’d be cool with primarily he prounouns but also like? a they every once and a while to spice things up. maybe some neopronouns that just sound nice to him? (i can’t think of any specifically rn if anyone else has opinions on this i’d love to hear your thoughts :])

- fig: she doesnt give a fuck babeyyy. one of those “genders not real so i get to do whatever the fuck i want with it” people. i think that comes out a lot mostly via gender expression more than actual labels? fig is just vibing. i think pronouns would probably be something along the lines of she/he/hy/ze. maybe sometimes fig just wants to go by no pronouns and just goes by her name. it depends !

[bl00dgutsgl0ry]

Rivalry Put To Rest

Pairing - Zhongli x Fem!Reader

Warnings - Arranged marriages (non of that under age like child marriages though fuck that yuck, these are obviously of age adults i just really wanna make that clear jesus), praise kink, modern AU, just lovely soft sex with my favorite man :'^).

Word Count - 2.4k

Other Comments - Dude it’s been so long since ive actually written anything im so sorry. But i couldn't resist writing this. I know i promised xiao but he will come in time. This is a little bit of a slow burn, or at least the sex doesnt start right away lol i want this to be nice and soft. P.s. youre on birth control so dont worry about no condom lol.

You did not like this idea. Why your parents were still forcing you into this was beyond you seeing as how you were a fully grown ass adult. You just couldn’t stomach the disappointment you would be seen as in their eyes. You were the daughter to the CEO of one of the most well known Law Firms in Teyvat. Zhongli was the son of another CEO who controlled your Rival company. Yours's and his parents wanted to finally settle the bad blood between the firms by having the two of you get married. You knew damn well the benefits of doing this was, god forbid if your Fathers firm went underwater, you would still be secure with Zhongli as your husband.

It’s not that you didn’t like Zhongli, and he certainly was not ugly; you just couldn’t stand your freedom to choose who you really wanted to marry being ripped from you. It was non negotiable though, so you had to go through with it. Zhongli didn’t seem to mind at all, he thoroughly enjoyed his very brief moments he had with you before, and was frankly excited to get more of those moments. He just hoped you didn’t resent him or blame him for this.

You both of course had an extravagant wedding, why would you not when your family was one of the wealthiest in Teyvat. You were grateful to your parents for letting you invite a few of your friends, and it seemed Zhongli had done the same. There was almost like a crowd formed around you two at the after party, you talking to your friends, and him with his. Zhongli had offered you his arm to hold onto, but you politely declined, feeling that even just holding his arm was too intimate for you.

“Already trouble in paradise for the two lovebirds?” One of Zhongli’s friends had chuckled, a red head with a stupidly smug smile tugging at the corners of his mouth as you shot a look at him. Your friend Ningguang frowned, turning to look at your now husband.

“Control your dog, Mr. Zhongli.” You let out a chuckle, when you heard Zhongli’s friend scoff.

After a while, it was customary for the newlyweds to go on their honeymoon; so after a couple of hours you had to bid farewell to your friends and family. You approached the jet the two of you would be taking, with Zhongli carrying the luggage not far behind. You went ahead and boarded, while your new husband spoke with the pilot and the crew, sighing to yourself.

“Come on (y/n) suck it up, this honeymoon will be over sooner than you know it.” You mumbled to yourself, settling into the high class jet.

“Did you say something (y/n)?” You jumped, not expecting to hear Zhongli’s voice. “Ah.. My apologies, I did not mean to startle you.” You sighed and shook your head, waiving your hand to dismiss the apology.

“You’re fine Zhongli, I’m just… Nervous is all.” He hummed in response, nodding as he settled himself into the jet.

“I understand (y/n), I really do apologize about this being thrusted into your lap. I know this isn’t the ideal circumstances for a young woman to go through.” You nodded, glad that he understood your hesitance to the situation. Zhongli really wasn’t a bad guy.

“It’s really not your fault Zhongli, I understand you probably had no more say in it than I.” You gave him a reassuring smile, the first genuine smile to grace his line of sight. Without noticing he found himself smiling back, relieved that you didn’t see him with any contempt. A comfortable silence settled, as the jet took off towards your destination.

It wasn’t a long flight, and along the way you were able to make small talk, slowly learning more about Zhongli. After two short hours, you felt the jet jump slightly against the ground before steadying itself on the runway. After a few more moments, you both departed, Zhongli once again handling the luggage, leaving your side to retrieve it.

Before you knew it, you were at the house you would be staying at for your honeymoon. It sat on a beautiful beach side shore, with a large open patio looking out over the ocean. By the time you guys had arrived it was already around 10:00 o’clock at night, so the crescent moon was high in the sky as you both stepped out onto the patio. The moon and stars gleamed against the inky black water, with the rhythmic beating of the waves lulling you both into a comfortable silence. You stood next to your husband and finally for the first time that night, actually took in his face.

The light of the scenery exposed the beauty Zhongli held in his face, the pale light bouncing off his cheekbones and illuminating his golden irises as he looked out over the sea. He must’ve felt you staring because moments later those golden eyes were locked on yours.

“Do you like the scenery (y/n)?” You gave a quick nod before ducking away from his gaze, a red flush rising to your face. You heard him chuckle for a moment before shifting.

“I know what is customary to happen on our honeymoon, and I do not want you to feel pressured to fulfill that part of our relationship.” You flushed even more as you suddenly found the pattern of the wood to be very interesting. You had completely forgot that sex was usually something people did on honeymoons. It seemed normal, because generally the people who get married have had a relationship before this so nothing felt awkward about the topic. Obviously that wasn't the case in this situation, but there was something in you that kind of wanted to. Something in you that felt comfortable enough with him to do it, you already trusted him which shocked you. What if he wasn’t though? What if he was uncomfortable with the thought of having sex with you right now which is why he brought it up so suddenly?

“Thank you Zhongli, you’re too kind. You’ve truly been so understanding through this entire thing.” You looked back up to him finally, and found a gentle smile on his face. He nodded and hummed before turning back to the house.

“We should probably get to bed, it’s already fairly late.” You nodded, pulling out your phone to check the time. You both walked about into the house together. “There is another room down the hall from the master bedroom if you don’t want to sleep in the same bed. It’s smaller so I could always take it.” There he goes, being considerate and kind; handling your thoughts and feelings like glass that would break any second. You remained silent for a moment contemplating on what he had said, before gently shaking your head.

“No, no, it’s fine. I want to share the bed with you.” You smiled up at him, and he looked almost surprised with your willingness, but the shock didn’t last for long before he smiled back at you and nodded; offering you his arm to hold on to, which you shakily took. You both reached the bedroom, where he had placed all of your guy's luggage before letting you go to retrieve your sleeping clothes as he did the same. You went into the bathroom, to give yourself and him some privacy before slowly re-entering. Zhongli was in a pair of brown silk pants with golden accents and a black short sleeve shirt. Your eyes met each other, and Zhongli smiled when he saw you.

“I know that these were unideal circumstances to get married, but I’m happy it is you who is my spouse. I can only hope you think the same of me, and that at some point you can genuinely feel connected to me.” You blushed as he said this, genuinely taken aback by the sincerity in his voice. You feel bad for dreading and almost resenting Zhongli when you were first notified about the engagement, once finding out just how compassionate and caring the man before you was. Slowly, the two of you made your way into the large king sized bed. There was a large gap between the two of you, large enough to comfortably fit another person. Your mind raced a mile a minute trying to decide whether or not you should scoot in a little closer to the man next to you.

And so you did, without taking another moment to think about it you shifted closer to Zhongli until your side gently pressed against his. You felt Zhongli stiffen beside you for a brief moment, and for a split second you regretted scooting in; that was until you felt him roll over onto his side and wrap a strong arm around your torso. You could really take in Zhongli’s scent like this and you noticed that he smelled like amber rum, chestnuts, and a hint of vanilla. It wrapped you in a warmth that lulled you into a comforting silence as the two of you laid together like this.

You rolled onto your side, letting Zhongli’s arm now rest against your waist. Your noses were almost touching as the two of you stared into each other's eyes. You saw his eyes dart down to your lips for the briefest of seconds, letting yourself do the same.

“Zhongli…” Your voice was barely above a whisper. “Can I kiss you?” You saw Zhongli’s eyes widen as his gorgeous eyes met yours, not expecting you to ask him that.

“I would love nothing more… Darling.” You flushed at the mild pet name, before softly placing your lips onto his. It felt as time skidded to a halt, as the two of you moved against each other with the grace of a slow dance. Soon enough it became heated, as you changed positions and straddled his hips. You could feel his boner pressing against you through his pants, and it made warmth bloom in your chest.

“You really want to do this right? You don’t feel pressured my dear?” You smiled at Zhongli’s questions, nodding before he could get another one out. It felt good to be so concerned about, so doted over.

“Yes Zhongli, I really want to do this with you. I trust you.” This time it was Zhongli’s turn to flush, an elegant smile gracing his lips. Before long, the both of you were out of your sleeping clothes and back on top of one another. Your back was to the silken bed sheets, as Zhongli was on top of you lining his hard cock up with your eager pussy. Zhongli gave you one last look before slowly entering you inch by inch. To say he was huge would be an understatement, so he knew he had to take it slow with you so as to not hurt you in any way. Zhongli needed this to be a good experience with you, he would never forgive himself if he hurt you or made this unenjoyable in any way at all.

The noises you were making and the way your hands were clawing at his back reassured him that he was doing everything right so far, always stopping after pushing in a few inches to give you time to adjust. Without thinking, Zhongli's mouth just started moving as words spilled out.

“You’re doing so good for me my angel, you’re taking me so well. You’re too good for me.” With the praise spilling out of Zhongli’s mouth, you couldn’t help but unleash a flurry of loud moans, as he bottomed out. He stood still for a couple moments, making sure you were nice and comfortable, until he felt you trying to move against him; trying to get him to move in and out of you.

“If you were ready for me to move, all you needed to do was ask my gem.” You let out a whine like moan, that evolved into a guttural groan when he finally started to thrust in and out of you. Your nails raked across his skin, surely leaving marks for you to admire after this was all said and done. He wasn’t skipping out on the marks either, as he sucked and bit at your skin, still throwing out praise every time his mouth left your skin. His fingers dug into your hips, as he sped up. He just couldn’t help himself, your wet quivering pussy just felt way too good wrapped around him; sucking him in every time he pulled out.

“I can’t believe it took us getting into an arranged marriage to finally meet, my god where have you been all my life.” Zhongli had begun to groan, obviously getting close to tipping over the edge, with the way his thrusts continued to get sloppier every so often. You moaned in response, too blissed out of your mind to form actual words. Zhongli’s head fell against your shoulder, his ebony black hair hanging off his shoulders.

With a few more strokes, Zhongli had both of you tumbling over the edge and cumming in unison. All that could be heard in your room was the quiet crashing of waves and the combined panting of the both of you. After a few moments of Zhongli getting his breath back he tumbled down next to you, sweaty shoulders touching. A couple seconds of silence passed before you spoke up in a raspy broken voice.

“It took us so long because I’m technically your rival.” You were giggling slightly, when Zhongli let out a loud chuckle.

“I guess you are right my dear, but now we are joined together. And I cannot wait to see what comes of our joining.”

[sloppykyuu]

So since we already agreed on the fact that Issei is absolutely in love with his gf and would do everything for her my head came up with new ideas :)

Isseis gf with a very very high libido and wants to have sex everywhere at all times, doesnt matter where they are, what they're doing or who is around. If she wants something she gets it he never denies her. So it's not uncommon for Issei to just leave sometimes cos she texted him anything suggestive like "so alone have to take care of myself" and he will get up during any time and go home to her so she can have what she wants. If they're grocery shopping and she wants it they will go to an isle with no one around and he will go on his knees and eat her out, if they're in the library he will bend her over a table, if they're at a family dinner he will finger her under the table. At one point Issei started to take notes how often she wanted to fuck everyday for a week and god over the number of 40 times. He had the list at the refrigerator so he wouldn't lose it and one day makki and iwa came over and saw it and were a bit shook and later told oikawa and he was so mad that he wasn't in Isseis position and they held a intervention for him to ask if he was ok and if he could keep up with his gf and all Issei says is that if he doesnt have the energy to fuck her anymore he will let her use him to her pleasure like a toy and no one ever asked why he has to leave (◍•ᴗ•)

WOOF BARK BARK

Issei has gotten in trouble with you way too many times to count. By his friends, random employees, and, unfortunately, by both of your parents.

Your drive for pleasure has always surprised him. You could be doing simple mundane tasks when all of a sudden you turn to Issei with the biggest doe eyes and voice sweet as sugar, a hand clutching at his sleeve.

“Please Issei,” you’d whisper, “need you.” He’d always give you a soft sigh before falling to his knees or popping his cock out of his jeans. Anywhere. Everywhere.

As much as he seemed to complain, he fucking loved it. Loved your the sweet taste of your wet cunt, and your sometimes too loud of whimpers. It was utterly addicting.

He loved how he was the only one you turned to to make you cum. Like you couldn’t get enough of humping yourself on his thick cock, grinding your face onto the tongue that slips inside you causing toe curling pleasure to erupt all throughout your body, and letting him stuff two fingers knuckle deep inside you right under the table as he conversed with your parents.

Each of the boys have walked in on you two more times than either of can count. Well actually you could count them, because after a certain week where it felt like every hour you asked him to have sex, he didn’t think he could cum anymore by the end of the week. Issei decided that it was good idea, or maybe he just thought it was funny, to record every time you two had sex.

You never really thought anything of the number well over the 40s on your fridge. But apparently it was shocking because Iwaizumi and Makki stood in front of the little dry erase board on the fridge with mouths wide open.

“What are you two doing?” Issei walked into the kitchen after noticing the two boys were taking a long time to get the drinks.

Makki pointed at the chart displaying 46 tally marks with the words ‘sex count lol’ underlined with the month right next to it.

“This month alone you’ve had sex 46 times?!” He said loudly. A chuckle came from Issei at the bewildered expression and just shrugs at them.

“Yeah, girl can fuck.”

His reply didn’t help. At all. Because now they were even more surprised. You were the one intiating all this?!

“Hold up,” Iwaizumi starts. “She’s the one starting all this?”

Before Issei can answer a loud whine comes from behind them.

“What is taking you guys so long to get the drinks?” Oikawa stomps into the kitchen.

“Mattsun and his girlfriend fuck like rabbits.” Makki and Issei both laugh.

“What do you mean?” Oikawa’s eyebrows furrow as Iwaizumi points at the board on the fridge. He squints before getting closer to it to read it and shoots his wide open. “46?! We’re only two weeks into November!”

Issei just shrugs again, “eh, some of it’s from last month.”

The other three boys give each other a look before pushing Issei into the living room and telling him to sit, saying that they needed to have a serious talk.

“The fuck do you mean, we need to have a talk?” Issei looks at the boys skeptically.

“We’re a little worried about you. I mean that’s a lot of sex.” Iwaizumi says, concern lacing his features.

“Okay..? Im not sure I’m really understanding.”

Oikawa huffs from the seat across him and folds him arm, a childish pout on his lips. Issei just smirks at him knowing Oikawa wishes he had a girl all over him like you were with Issei.

“Don’t you ever get tired? I’m assuming you have sex at least twice a day.” Makki sips on his beers from next to Iwaizumi and speaks from around the rim of the bottle.

“Well, yeah I get tired but, like, who am I to deny her. If she’s horny and I’m too tired I just let her use me.” They’d be lying if they said they wouldn’t want someone like that. To have someone who can’t get enough of your cock that they have to please themselves with it.

“That’s so unfair.” Oikawa’s pout deepens, “why did he get a girlfriend like that.”

Iwaizumi started yelling at Oikawa about something but it was all blocked out as he soon as he opened the text from you.

A picture of your bare body body splayed across his screen. A hand in between your thighs and breasts pushed together. His cock twitched at the sight.

Underneath the photo your message read, “I know you’re with the boys but I hate taking care of myself :(“.

Issei stood up from the couch, interrupting whatever bickering was happening, to go grab his coat. They all just watched as he walked out the door of his own house.

“He’s so fucking lucky.” Oikawa whined again, the other two just nodding in agreement as they stated at the door.

Because no doubt in their minds was he heading over to your apartment right now to fuck your little brains out.

A/n: I fucking loved this 🤚😭

Requests open!

[seravph]

Hi, I didn't really know who to reach out for this question, but do you have any tips on how to find your own unique fashion style? I'm not really looking to hop on popular clothing trends on social media e.g. eboy/girl or cottagecore, so I'm not exactly sure where to start! I come to consult you because I've seen some of your posts and you look very well versed in fashion and you seem to know your own personal style. My wardrobe is very outdated and I would like to update it to reflect the truest expression of myself. Thank you 😊 You don't have to answer this if you don't feel like doing so btw 😅

EEEE more fashion asks i love these thank you!!!! warning this got a lil (very) long so its under the cut :^)

so first and foremost the most important part about curating your own style is to learn more about your body and what flatters/doesnt flatter it. it's learning some basic fashion 'rules' pertaining to proportions, cuts, etc. there are plenty of resources on this if you dont know where to start (kibbe body test, video, video) but keep in mind this step has nothing to do with your weight!!!! i could talk wayyy more about this but at the end of the day, some clothing is just more flattering for specific body shapes - that doesnt mean you cant wear something that isnt perfectly flattering, but knowing your body and knowing what flatters it will make you understand your own style and help guide the pieces you buy. fashion 'rules' arent necessarily meant to be followed, but just understood so that 'breaking' them is a conscious choice. (it also really helped with my insecurities???? like this step is basically recognizing that its not your body thats unflattering, its the clothing, if that makes sense???)

also remember that every 'style' works for every body type. i.e if you want to be a 60s vibe but youre too curvy for shift dresses, there are plenty of clothes in a similar style that would look great on you <3 basically, if you dont like the way a piece looks on you, you can still achieve the same vibe with a different article of clothing thats more flattering. but also umm.... you can just wear the unflattering thing if you want LOL if it makes you happy... then it becomes your own controlled decision <3 live love laugh follow your heart

okay. now that you have that out of the way. there are a million ways to develop a sense of style, and no particular order in which i recommend them. what i love doing is creating pinterest boards for the spring/summer or fall/winter seasons and just filling them with pieces i would wear in a perfect world. i dont mean like cottagecore aesthetic boards, just boards full of runway looks and clothing pngs that i like. i also love making little outfits for characters which can influence my own style. everyone thinks of their style differently; i think of my own outfits as little vignettes with narratives behind them, but other people are more concerned with just wearing things they think are pretty, other people view it as an expression of art or their identity, and other people just want to feel comfortable!!! its all up to you and what youre drawn to!!

one thing that tan france mentioned once was to go online window shopping by going onto the website for a brand you like (regardless of whether its affordable or realistic!) and just adding things to your cart that youre interested in. dont worry about how expensive they are or anything, and when youre done, remove all the items you like the least. and then keep reviewing and removing until you have just a handful of really nice items you really like, and keep doing this with other brands until you can identify common threads between the pieces you like. you dont have to buy them!! in fact maybe its better if you dont!!! and the websites dont have to be like zara or h&m ... go on balmain or chanel if you want, play pretend and have fun!!

re: the last bullet point, i think a big turn off for people in terms of fashion is the idea that you need to wear something palatable and 'appropriate.' its like looking at a runway and thinking "its nice, but i would never wear that in real life." but honestly????? in a perfect world i would be wearing full gowns to the supermarket!!!! if your ideal style is imaginative but unattainable, your style in practice will be a microcosm of it. basically... dream big... dont be afraid to 'overdress' if its what you like!! one of the best pieces of advice i ever got was from my aunt, who offered to by me a plastic tiara. i asked her when i was ever going to wear it irl, and she just looked at me and said "??? you can wear it whenever you want to!!" so true!!! wear a tutu to mcdonalds. wear a bedazzled tux to prom. who cares

accessories, nail polish, hair, jewelry, perfume and makeup goes a long way in developing style. i dont wear a ton of makeup, but just putting some color on my cheeks achieves a kind of sunkissed lovestruck vibe that i strive for. i paint my nails red because i think its chic or bright colors so they contrast with a toned down outfit. even wearing no accessories is an accessory in itself. accessorizing (or specifically not accessorizing) is like adding texture to an outfit imo

anything that advises you about 'absolutely necessary essentials everyone needs' is entirely wrong. there is no one size fits all; i.e everyone says you need one good pair of denim jeans, but i havent worn jeans in two years!!! an essential for ME is a pair of neutral wool shorts, but an essential for another person could be a thick knit sweater or for another person, a flannel. the idea that everyone needs a 'little black dress' or a 'basic white t shirt' is preposterous. YOUR essentials depend entirely on YOUR style. a pair of denim jeans is useless if you hate wearing jeans!!!!

as for my personal style, im mostly influenced by movies, books, songs, characters, feelings, colors, high fashion, and costumes. ultimately, you should worry less about what you want to be and worry more about what you already like. every piece i have kind of plays into some narrative ive constructed, or otherwise theyre all special to me :) if you want to update your wardrobe, dont feel the need to over consume fast fashion (or any fashion for that matter) to do so. if you take it slow and buy pieces you really love, every item will have a story and you'll begin to develop a more stable internal style and they'll last longer :)

let me know if you have questions or want me to talk more about any of this because i really love answering these kinds of questions!!!!!! especially the body type thing because thats such an important but long winded thing i couldnt really fit it all LOL

some more videos + resources about style and fashion i think are interesting:

deep dive into kibbe body types

pinterest aesthetics, fatphobia, and white washing

lies about clothes to unlearn in your twenties

studio ghibli: how clothing shapes identity

breakfast at tiffanys style analysis: the reinvention of onself with fashion

will the millennial aesthetic ever end?

go viral, post #spon, get canceled: how social media transformed fashion in the 2010s

analyzing the "is it a cute outfit or is she just skinny?" meme

[milkacchan]

Request for @bnhakaminari : Hi! How are you? May I please request Bakusquad x Omega!Reader headcanons? Maybe she's like their only omega? 🥺 It doesn't have to be female pronouns if you don't want! Also, I'm sorry if this request is weird! Thank you so so much and I hope you have a nice day/night!

Idk if you wanted poly so I did poly bc I physically can not resist poly

And it's not weird bc I really do love me some omegaverse.

Mayhaps I'll do a part 2 nsfw

• Baby GURL you're the only omega

• And thank god you are their omega

• Because all of them are Alphas

• Which can be hard to deal with

• Bevause while theyre friends, really good friends, they're still Alphas and that can get messy sometimes

• None of them are particularly aggressive with their instincts but if we have to list it it'd go

1. Bakugou

2. Mina

3. Kirishima

4. Denki

5. Sero

• In order for them to be genuinely aggressive it has to be deep rut or someone is trying to hurt their omega

• But tensions can get high since it's a bunch if alphas together all the time, they can but heads

• You're drawn to Sero and Mina first

• Sero's just really calm and down to earth and he's funny

• He's easy to be around and he smells /great/

• Its just strong enough to be calming but not overwhelming

• Mina kinda just started bothering you when you transferred in because you were pretty and you were a girl.

• Actually, Mina saw you when she was with Sero and she was like, 'that one. I want that one.'

• And Sero was immediately on board like yes we want thay one

• Your room is right next to hers

• This ends in her just being an annoying neighbor but you don't really mind because its mina and how could you not love her

• Then without really anything being said you're integrated into the Bakusquad and it's great

• Kirishima is bubbly and smiley

• Denki is just happy theres another girl

• and you're pretty so win

• Bakugou seems a little skeptic at first- unsure of where this is going but he's civil and quickly warms up to you

• Its unspoken that they take on a protective role

• Someone's giving you shit? At least one of them are there to back you up. Most of the time its Bakugou. It doesn't matter where in the room he is, he's by your side in seconds to ward off whatever BS the person in front of

• You're feeling sad? They're all there cuddling you so you feel better. They turn your ass into a burrito.

• Denki is already pulling out the memes

• You're super excited about something? They listen as you ramble warm smiles on their faces

• They'll play with your hair, massage your scalp until your purring against it

• They have a way with you and it's obvious to everyone around them

• They are MAGIC at calming you down

• If you're upset or frustrated at a training exercise, they each have their own ways to help.

• Kiri is a softer alpha in general. Along with Sero they were both raised in house holds where they were taught being an Alpha doesnt excuse being aggressive or wreckless.

• Seros mother was a beta

• Kirishimas mother was an Alpha who was raised with Betas.

• Kiri is often holding your hand in public if you get anxious

• Or letting you lean against him when you're tired or upset

• Most people think the two of you are established but you're not

• Sero absolutely gives you his jacket if you get cold

• Minas super cuddly and touchy all the time regardless of why so more often than not she's clinging to you

• That is if she's not busy making googoo eyes at you

• Need a laugh?

• Need a laugh so hard you're wheezing and struggling to breathe?

• Five minutes. That's all the time Denki needs.

• Crackheads tm

• What's even better is when yall get together when you're both sleep deprived

• It concerns the rest of the group

• and they're curious as to why you two are curled up on the floor laughing so hard you're crying over a picture of CHEESE

• But that's what happening

• Bakugous way of showing he diesnt hate you rn is

1. Buying you food occasionally

2. Helping you train

3. Offering to study with you

• But he can be really soft too

• Like that one time you just weren't having a good day and he carried you mid breakdown to your room

• You had your legs wrapped around his waist, face buried in the back of his neck as your arms were wrapped tightly around his chest

• Being the only omega in the group, they dote on you even before they ask to offically court you

• Oh you wanted that food? A few dollars short? Dont worry baby Bakugous got you

• You want to listen to a song? Kaminari "Everyone shut the FUCK up so she can hear," Denki

• You want attention? You genuinely dont even have to ask they know

• AS I SAID BEFORE THEY WILL PLAY WITH YOUR HAIR AS MUCH AS POSSIBLE

• ESPECIALLY UNTIL YOU'RE PURRING

• S c e n t i n g

• You realize they all pretty much smell the same as a result of scenting

• And the omega definitely comes out when they scent you (even before courtship)

• They take turns scenting you

• Each time your eyes flutter close and your grip their shirt as your cheeks burn

• But it's so nice

• And you've never really been scented

• And you're leaning into the touch, Keening at them, just completely content with your place

• And they're fawning over it

• They love it

• Thus enters this weird phase where yall might be a thing but theres no offical courting

• but theres hands and scenting and you're pretty sure Mina almost kissed you the other day

• Its a lil confusing but thays okay

• When I say you're unaware that the four Alphas are a thing

• I mean you're obliviously unaware

• You just thought they were affectionate friends

• Because some friendships are very affectionate

• And then, they ALL bring you small courting gifts and

• At the same time

• And it clicks

• Fuck they're all wearing necklaces

• THE SAME NECKLACE

• Oh

• Oh

• OH

• "You want me to be everyone's omega,"

"If you're okay with it, and you like all of us, then yes."

• and obviously you're okay with it

• who wouldn't be.

• Its 10/10 lemme tell you

• you help ease tension sometimes

• Using your own pheromones or gentle touches just like they do w you

• They have uncovered another way of calming you down

• Food.

• "She's mad again," Denki whines

"Give her an apple or sumn,"

"No, you dumb bitch. Chocolate,"

"Why don't we just take her out to eat??"

"BINGO."

• They steal kisses whenever they can

• and I mean

• WHENEVER

• Onviously if youre not okay w PDA they'll lean of that ut other than that your lips are not safe

• When you go through your first heat with them, it KILLS them.

• The top floor is used for omegas when they go into heats

• Which isnt super often because if suppressants (which most omegas take,) but sometimes the suppressants get salt

• Alpha ruts are contained to their own dorms, they don't have a separate floor

• But anyway, your suppressants wear off :)

• And they learn that your heats are particularly painful

• Because they can smell the distress and frustration in the fucking stairwell

• And they /cant/ help and it /sucks/ because they want to help /so bad/

• Expect lots of kisses and hugs and cuddles when your heat is over

• And Denki crying because he missed you

• And Eijirou holding your waist as you lean against his chest

• Listen just expect a lot of affection and love in general

• Lots of touches and kisses

• Lots of sharing scented clothes too

• They'll scent just about anything you ask them too, not questions asked

• And they melt when they see you using whatever it is

• They're best alphas tm

[yukina-otome]

Otome game MC’S

Hello everyone ! Today i am gonna tell you about my opinion on the mc’s of the otome games i played ! Again this is just my opinion so feel free to share yours or complete with your opinion on mc’s of otome games i didnt include !

This is not a ranking btw !

MLQC MC: Youran

Job: Producer | Queen

Age : 22 year old

Good points : 1-Brave and take risks 2-Never give up 3-Smoll bean (seriously she's so cute) 4-Really nice and helpfull (walk around the city for hours every week to help anyone in need) 5-Hardworking 6-Tell whats on her mind and doesnt hide her feelings 7-Can play piano

Bad points: 1-Bad decision making 2-Rely on the boys too much 3-Mary sue 4-Clumsy AF 5-Sneez\ stomach noises when boy is about to kiss her

Mystic messenger mc:

Age and Job: Depends

Depend on the route 1-Yoosung : Super patient and mature 2-Jaehee: Supportive 3-Jumin : God levels of patience but also kinda always have to agree with jumin which i hate 4-Seven : Happy go lucky and clueless about her whole situation (Seven : There is a BOMB | MC:LOL OK) 5-Another story : Guillible but also very patient. (i would take none of that s**t) Common to all routes : Have no eyes

My candy love MC: Lyn Darcy AKA Candy

Age : 17 during 1st season \ 23 during 2nd season \ 25 during 3rd season

Job : High schooler\ college student\ coffee owner

Good points: 1-Friendly 2-Helpful 3-Open minded 4-Pretty 5-Very strong mentally (during the highschool part) 6-Appearance can be customized 7-Energetic 8-Can get angry and speak her mind (depend on your choices)

Bad points: 1-Nosy AF 2-Mary sue 3-Play terapist with literally anyone she meet even if that mean getting herself in trouble and ignoring her own love life 4-Paranoid 5-Childish (even for a highschooler and even more in campus life)

7hotties MC AKA the worst mc (No pic for her cause tumblr says only 10 pic per post)

Job : Freelance designer  Age : middle 20′s

Good points :

1-None

2-Nothing

3-Absolutely nothing

Bad points: 1-Weak 2-Useless 3-Doormat 4-Almost jobless (never seen her work aside from keita's route because he is the one who gave her the job) 5-Bland AF 6-Forgive everything a guy do to her (even rape) 7-Never actually get mad (even after a guy sleep with her and dump her literally right after she's like "pls don't abandon me! Tell me if i did anything wrong ! I'll fix it")

SSS MC:

Job: Concierge at the royal shining

Age : Early 20′s

Good points: 1-Sassy 2-Have a goal in her life and a dream she will not abandon no matter what 3-Can solve mental illness with love (because otome game power) 4-Described as extra pretty (All the boys at her workplace like her) 5-Doesnt give up easily 6-Actually got some backstory 7-Thirsty AF 8-Relatable

Bad points: 1-Forgive too easily (Minami's route !!) 2-Always get caught when spying or listening on someone's conversation 3-Clumsy AF 4-Can't brew coffee even after two weeks of trying (toma's route) 5-Actually not so good at her job but she's trying really hard

Le secret d'henri\Henri's secret MC: Lyla (Actually not an otome game, more like a visual novel but i wanted to include it because i absolutely love the mc and also because it's getting a remake and i wanted to promote it a bit)

Job : Highschooler

Age: 17 then 18

Good points: 1-Strong 2-Naive in all the right ways (she know how naïve she is but still choose to be naïve because she'd rather get backstabbed because she trusted than miss the opportunity to know a good person because she didn't trust)

3-Very pretty (Said to be the prettiest girl in all the high school and literally every boy she met aside from her brother and clement her bestie want to date her.)

4-Very popular 5-She is so nice even Henri call her a saint 6-Have the best family 7-Have the best friends 8-Supportive 9-Likes to play detective and solve people's problem 10-You really get attached to her by the end of the story you are almost sad because you wont get to see her again

Bad points: 1-Overreact 2-Drama queen (I understand tho as she is still a highschooler so she get emotional and depressed quite easily specially when it comes to a certain someone)

3-A bit too perfect sometime : Pretty girl, nice , friendly, cool, like nailpolish and fashion but also manga and video games, smart etc etc 4-MARY SUE 5-Nosy but not in an annoying way

Ikevamp MC:

Job: Travel agent and blogger | Housemaid

Age: Early to middle twenties

Good points : 1-She's said to be very beautiful (leo's route) 2-Speak many languages and seem to have a wide board of interests 3-Adapt fast to her new environment (depend on the routes) 4-Mentally strong (specially in napoleon's route) 5-Kinda mature (sometimes and depend on the route) Bad points: 1-Inconsistent personality even in the same route 2-Mary sue 3-Can be very weak and submissive (depend on the route) 4-Have no reason to stay aside for the boy she loves (what I mean is that by the end of the route the only thing she have in 19th century France is her boyfriend, in some routes she doesn't even meet or talk to most of the other resident and she have no job aside from cleaning the mansion with Sebastian)

5-Also get kidnapped every route (don't know yet for Theo) 6-Always wear the same clothes

Ikerev MC : Alice

Job: Help at a bakery ?

Age: Early twenties (saw somewhere that she was the same age as ray, not sure tho)

Good points : 1-Like food 2-Foodie 3-Enjoy food 4-Food = Happiness 5-More seriously she's super positive and optimistic and adapt really fast to her environment 6-Friendly and happy go lucky 7-Have the power to repel magic and protect herself and sometime her suitor to some degrees

Bad points: 1-Clueless 2-Dumb AF 3-Bad decision making 4-Get kidnapped almost every route 5-Zero observation and deduction skills (Oliver's route) 6-Technically squat at the black\red army headquarter\Oliver and Blanc's house or Harr and Loki's house

Ikesen MC : Mai AKA the queen AKA the fireball AKA the little mouse AKA The godess AKA the wild boar

Job: Seamstress

Age: around 25

Good points : 1-Strong AF 2-Take no sh*t (Kenshin's route\ Nobunaga's route...) 3-Adapt quite fast to her new and very dangerous environement (if i was her i would not leave my room for the next 3 months) 4-Fireball 5-Saved her suitor in many routes (Kenshin, Ieyasu, Shingen...) 6-Sass Queen 7-Have a life in sengoku era aside from her suitor (kinda the opposite of ikevamp mc as i said in bad point 4) 8-Have a dream and a goal 9-Very beautiful (even kenshin said so outside of his route and he was not in love with her!) 10-A lot of chemistry with all of the boys even outside of their routes.

Bad points : 1-Mary Sue 2-In some routes she is weaker but it never really disturbed me as it suited the love interest of the route(Sasuke and mitsuhide's route) 3-Kidnapping

Midcin MC:

Job : Princess

Age: Heard somewhere that she is 19 but not sure about it

Good points : 1-Adapt fast to her new situation 2-Try her best to learn everything 3-Try to take responsibility as the new princess 4-Can't think of anything else for her...

Bad points : 1-Weak 2-Bland 3-Doesnt speak up when she actually need to (The dumpster fire that is Alyn's ever after) 4-Kidnapping sometime twice in the same route 5-Submissive depending on the suitor

Okko's games MC'S : Honestly they r all the same so reunited them all in one

Job and age : Depend on the game

Good points: 1-Hard working 2-Have goals and dreams 3-Usually have a backstory 4-Some of them are sassy 5-Pretty but doesn't take care of herself 6-Always have a very fashionable bestie with a lot of experience with dating that help her and listen to her problems

Bad points: 1-Emotional maturity of a middle school girl 2-Doesnt want to admit her feelings and keep denying them even when there is no reason to 3-Self sabotage 4-Blame herself for every bad thing that happens 5-Some of them are very weak and submissive

And that’s pretty much it ! Thank you for reading until the end ! Pls feel free to reblog and add on those with your opinion ! 

[ectonurites]

My least favorite type of fic!Tim is when he’s portrayed as depressed/very mentally and emotionally unstable, but also at the same time as someone who is like lauded as being super dangerous/the most skilled or something like that?? Those fics where Tim is chugging caffeine and barely sleeping, but characters are still like “oh I wouldn’t wanna piss off Tim he is Dangerous” and that’s annoying enough but then there are fics that at the same time as that portray him as like on the edge of a breakdown. It’s very irritating even if I’m not sure I can articulate exactly why, it just really rubs me the wrong way. Like, I definitely do think Tim has some issues with depression and stuff, but in fics like those it’s treated more like a quirk sort of instead of a serious issue

LMAOO I KNOW EXACTLY WHAT YOU’RE TALKING ABOUT i’m not a fan of that either. I’m apologizing in advance if I sound mean in any of this critique i’m about to give of that fanon version of him. I want to preface this by saying that people can write whatever the hell they want, like, they’re allowed to! And I’m not referencing/calling out any specific works here. Just trends. But I’m gonna bitch about some things I’ve noticed that annoy me, personally. (so again, not saying other people can’t enjoy this stuff! just. not for me)

so like sorry if im mean but this is just me ranting and also this is my blog anyways so:

(nobody take this as an attack on them please because it’s really not)

The problem is a lot of those fics seem to interpret Tim’s behavior in Red Robin (& especially like that last whole arc of his Robin run also by FabNic) as if that’s his normal, rather than the result of a few years of CONSTANT traumatic incidents pushing him to a breaking point (because while all the shit he went through with his Dad, Steph, Kon, Bart, and then Bruce dying was spread out over several years for us as readers, it’s regarded as like within two years in canon! It all happens when he’s 16 and 17. According to the Batman comic right after War Games, Jack was murdered only days after Steph died.

(Batman #634)

That’s a LOT to process for one kid jesus christ) 

I love Red Robin honestly, I do, but it is about Tim at the lowest points in his life. It’s the grand finale of Tim’s story, and everything crumbles, that’s kinda the point! The end leaves him in a position to either rebuild himself or fall apart. It’s all about how he chooses to continue after this point!

(Red Robin #26)

The way he acts and the things he does in that comic should be regarded as such. He can’t live the way he does in Red Robin forever or he will literally burn himself out/become something unrecognizable, like, jesus it’s kinda even acknowledged in the comic when he thinks about what his potential futures would be if he keeps it up like he’s doing:

(Red Robin #25)

He sees himself as dead, as Batman (which he has countless times said he doesn’t want to be and at this point in his history almost every time he’s seen a future he became Batman in he had become a killer), or needing to retire and taking over an Oracle-esque role, likely because he exerted himself too much to continue. 

When you look at him around this same timeframe when he’s not isolating himself/too deep into the mission and is instead working with his friends back on the Titans, you can see that he is starting to heal and work in a more positive direction. He’s choosing to work on coming out of this rough period by being together with his friends who he loves.

(Teen Titans (2003) #100)

Not to say that you can’t write about situations in which he doesn’t start to come out of it, but if you are doing so it’s something you should be taking seriously because that’s the idea you want to explore, not just acting like it’s perfectly okay or normal? (And again, there are a lot of works that do explore it in good ways, there’s just also a LOT that don’t)

Like, so much content I see just make any sadness and depression and tendency to over-work himself that’s rooted in his traumas (which! those do have a basis in canon!) into a quirky personality trait rather than a response to trauma. Acting as if he’s always been this way and it’s normal for him. That’s what bothers me. If people want to seriously explore the effects of all these incidents and how that plays into his ability to do his job as a hero, then hell yes do it! But when it all gets brushed off as ‘oh thats just tim, he just doesnt eat or sleep or feel any happiness but like its fine he’s just always been like that’ I feel my blood boil. 

This also often strikes me as related/tied to fanon’s seemingly never-ending quest to make Tim into this victim of so many things he really wasn’t. They make his childhood 10x worse than it actually was (yes he was lonely because he was sent to boarding schools rather than having his parents around, but he was NOT just left home alone all the time as a child. 

(Batman #441)

He snuck away during a school vacation week to follow Bruce one (1) time and to then track down Dick. This is established in his introduction story! PLEASE read Lonely Place of Dying!) and it just... going with those fanon assumptions as being true changes so much of how people characterize him! 

Some people will also (not to call out tim/kon shippers especially because I  literally am also one but) vilify the shit out of Steph and make their relationship out to be some abusive thing rather than just... a messy teen relationship between vigilantes because they had really complicated lives and baggage with one another? Which they both acknowledge they made mistakes in!

(Red Robin #10)

Or people will vilify the shit out of Dick in regards to the situation at the start of Red Robin, or literally just make anyone who Tim ever had a disagreement with out to be the bad guy despite the actual situations always being way more complex and multi-faceted than that.

And then on top of all that, aside from making him into this ‘im broken 24/7 and not doing anything to fix it also everyone around me is terrible to me’ type of character, because he’s a lot of people’s favorite, they also want him to be as cool and strong as he is at his high points. So they’re projecting all this stuff onto him that makes him what should be a barely functioning person but then also act like that’s fine and he’s able to be a dangerous badass on top of it. 

Like I’m sorry but someone who is going out and actively acting as a vigilante like that which is incredibly physically taxing is NOT surviving on coffee alone and no sleep. That’s literally not possible, he’d fucking collapse. (And like, again, if you want to explore him pushing himself to that point, that’s one thing! but acting like he can manage all of that for more than a few days at a time/maybe while working on one really tough case is nuts!) and like, even canon can be a little guilty of this type of thing particularly since the New 52 (Detective Comics 2016 had more than a few references to him barely sleeping, but at least they also made references to him eating normally/healthily and he wasn’t completely self isolating or anything) (and also that comic had him be so self sacrificial he was ready to die to save everyone and only didn’t die because of Mr.Oz’s interference, he’s definitely not in his best place there) but usually it’s still within some realm of possibility.

Also like. The fanon ‘chugging coffee to survive thing’ just annoys the shit out of me because, like, yes there’s a few moments in canon where he’s under a lot of pressure and pushing himself further than he normally would and had some coffee (one of the only times I can even remember him having it on panel is... oh... during that last Robin arc I just mentioned a little while ago shouldn’t be where you source your normal characterization of him because it’s a very difficult situation that pushes him further than he normally would go! huh!) But the thing is like, people play it off for laughs, or like it’s a normal thing he would do at any time in his life! If you want to explore him pushing himself and using coffee as a crutch, like, there’s ways you can write it that takes it seriously, but almost every time I see it come up in fics it is like a core part of his personality and just ‘oh haha silly tim always with his entire pot of coffee he must chug every morning or he’ll die :^)’ And that bothers the hell out of me. 

In general it’s just... people treat Tim so weird. They want him to be so many different things that he’s shown himself to be at different times for very specific reasons, except they want him to do all of it at the same time which just doesn’t work. A person can’t function like that, and it’s not even close to who he is in canon. 

Again, people can do what they want, and this is just my opinion obviously, but yeah. My two cents on the matter.  Read Lonely Place of Dying, read Young Justice, read his Robin run. Read his comics and get a feel for who he was before all the rest of his trauma, and see how he canonically reacts to it along the way. I know reading comics can be tough for some people but so much stuff just echo chambers and becomes barely recognizable in this fandom and it’s just... a shame when it happens with a character ya love. 

[haruno-sakura-san]

Can't remember if I posted this before, but I was reading through my notes on my phone and found it. Either way, enjoy this playful one shot with Sakura and a mystery man!

🌸❓

"Rough day?" A man who slid into the seat next to Sakura at the bar asked. "None of your business." She snubbed him. "It's been a while since ive seen a leaf nin drink like that," he observed unprompted. She mentally noted that she wasn't wearing her heite. He was either assuming from her gear or he recognized her. "I'm off duty." "I would hope so." Her gaze cut back over to him. A hood and tinted glasses obscured any identify features, but even so he looked incredibly mundane. In her line of work, that was also incredibly dangerous. "Listen, you seem like a nice guy-" "That assumptions a bit premature." "But I'm not here to meet anyone so if you don't mind-" "Actually I do." She glared at him for a long moment, not wanting to be interrupted again. "See, I'm waiting for someone myself." He offered finally. "You don't say" her tone thick with disinterest. "But I'm beginning to think I've been stood up." He sounded more amused than put out. She wondered if it was some kind of pickup strategy to get her to feel bad. "I can't imagine why." She said in the same flat tone. "My thoughts exactly."

Sakura made a sharp sound of disapproval. "My deepest sympathies. I don't see how this has anything to do with me." "Well, it really doesnt, on the surface. But you see, here I was feeling sorry for myself when I see you stomping in here, looking like you've just dragged yourself through a pigsty-" "It was a river bed." "Oh thank you- a river bed. Possibly the sorriest sight I've seen all day - not that I would normally say such a thing to a lady. I'm sure you look at least pleasant under normal circumstances." "Does this story have a point?" Feeling her anger swell at his commentary. "Of course, I just thought it might be nice to commiserate together - one passing stranger to another." She hates the cocky way he inclines his head, gesturing between them with his glass. "No, thanks." "Oh come on - why else come to a bar?" "For a drink - unbothered." "If that were the case, then I'd think the liquor store down the street would have done the job." "And what, have a few drinks at the store front? They have laws against that, you know." "You dont have a hotel room to drink in?" "Of course not" "Interesting." He purred. She realized she said too much. "So your plan was to get tipsy and then travel back to konoha or wherever your headed, seemingly alone, in the middle of the night." "I don't have to explain myself to you." "No, I think I've got a good handle on the situation without any explanation. Where are your teammates anyway? Isn't there someone around to keep you from making dangerous decisions like this. A captain maybe or a boyfriend?" Sakura slams her glass down against the wood of the bar. "For your information, I can more than take care of myself. I have an extremely high alcohol tolerance. And I've had too long a day for a pretty boy like you to be picking at me when all I want to do is have a drink in the peaceful Haven that is my own mind. So shut your trap. Am I clear?" "No, I have several questions." She snarls and begins to crack her nuckles in preparation to put this idiot though a wall when the bar tender yells, "No fighting in my bar! Take it outside if you want to act like animals." She settles back into her seat. "Sorry, sir. No need for that. This poser isn't worth the energy," she grumbles under her breath. "Lets backtrack to pretty boy. That had a nicer ring to it." Clenching her jaw, she takes a deep breath, exhales and takes a long drag on her drink. "So are you going to tell me the river bed story, Pocahontas?" "If I do, will you leave me alone?" "It certainly won't hurt your chances" She huffs. "Fine. I got caught in a fishing net." There was a beat of silence. "And?" She gave him a long-suffering look. "And was dragged behind a fishing boat." His eyebrows rose. "And how did that happen?" "I was pushing the boat. It was beached on a shallow part of the river." "Pushing it?" "Yeah." "Remind me to tip that bartender for not letting you deck me into next week." She smirked into her drink. Damn straight. "So when the boat broke free these fishermen did what? Cast their nets right done on top of you?" "Yup. I had to cut myself free and everything." "No good deed goes unpunished I guess." "Technically it wasn't a good deed, they were paying me to help." "That's even worse. And no one noticed you were missing onboard?" "Well, they wouldn't let me on the boat in the first place -" "Why not?" "It's bad luck." "Bad luck?" "To have a woman on board." "Wait a moment. So before the ship got stuck in the first place, while it was sailing, where were you? Nearby on the shore?" "No. I was running alongside them in the water." He laughed outright. "Running alongside them. That's too good. They didn't even give you rowboat." Her face flushed. She hadn't thought to ask for a row boat. "They were absolute assholes. Usually I can take quite a bit of crap from a client, but when he told me to pay for the net." "Pay for the net!" "And the lost profits for the day" "Ha!" "I told him just where he could shove his

lost profits and came to the nearest bar. I feel a little less sorry for myself now. Glad I could help. Now leave me be." "You don't want to hear my story?" "Not part of the deal. Now scram." He pouted, cheek resting on his hand. "But we were getting along so well." "You have a very twisted sense of relationships if you think that was getting along well." "I cannot argue with that." She didn't know if it was the alcohol or the bickering, but she was finally feeling a little unwound. Studying his profile for a moment, she thought it must definitely be the alcohol. "If you're going to stare, i might as well tell you my story." Definitely the alcohol. "I wasn't staring." She huffed, turning sharply away "Would admiring be more accurate?" "Do you ever shut up?" "For the majority of the time yes I do. It's quite liberating to go on and on like this. Strangers make some of the best conversation. You don't have to hold back because they will never see you again, probably not even remember speaking." She hated that he was right. She also hated that she couldn't see his eyes, instead watching his lips move. Kami must hate her because he had rather nice lips. "You're admiring again." They said. "Staring," she corrected. "Staring then." He said in a low voice, leaning in slightly. "Tell me your story." She said, trying to break the moment by divert this exchange to something hopefully safer for her psychy. Those damn lips curlled up in a feline grin. "Of course, my little mud pie." "Don't push it." She snapped, "You were meeting someone." "Yes, I've been seeing them for some time now. We are both wonderers so we meet about once a month. " "How long is some time now?" "Hmm, about ten years maybe." "And you guys haven't made it official yet?" "Well, it's complicated. They are a little old for me, and I'm not sure what society would think." She got the feeling he was making fun of her, but didn't get the joke. "They've never once been late or missed a meeting. I'm a little worried you see." For the first time since meeting the guy, Sakura felt a little bad for him. "Plus theyve got hands and eyes that wander a bit too much for my liking." "Sounds like they finally got bored and left." She commented. "Well. Even so, the meetings were as much about business as pleasure." "And just what kind of business are you in exactly?" "I'd say we were in the same field." She scoffs, looking him up and down again, not able to make out anything helpful from his form from under his travelling cloak to back up his claim about being a Shinobi. It was convenient line for civilian men who hit on kunoichi, so she rolled her eyes. "Sure you are." "Don't believe me?" "I believe you'd say just about anything to get on my good side."

"Hmm," his lips curled in that feline way, "And I thought leaf nin we're very skilled at seeing underneath the underneath." She froze, recognizing her sensei's phrase. "Who exactly did you say you were meeting again?" "I didn't." She slowly turned toward him, hand sliding to her thigh pouch under the bar, but it was too late. Here eyes were locked on his red, glowing gaze, pin wheels spinning. She felt her consciousness being torn from her body and into the inky black of his sharingan.

🌸❓

Quite sure this was supposed to be Itachi but it's quite OOC for him. So I'll leave it to you reader to fill in who it is. I guess I like Shisui for it myself but don't limit yourself haha.

[bigskydreaming]

Have you seen Linkara's review of The Dark Knight Returns? He goes into why the view of Robin as a soldier, popularized but by no means invented by Miller, is so dangerous.

I have not, but I need to refresh my memory before I go check it out because I’ll either agree with it or be infuriated by it and I can’t remember which just at the moment but would like to before I restart that argument ten years later.

LOL, so like, I knew Linkara yeeears and years ago. We were both regular posters on Gail Simone’s messageboard on CBR like fifteen years ago, maybe longer. Pretty sure we even met in person a couple times at Gail’s annual SDCC breakfast meetups, but not sure. I do know for sure though that he and I were both involved in a three way argument about this very topic with another guy.....I just can not remember if he was the one who agreed with me or the one we were both fighting with about it, LOL. I THINK we were in agreement as while I wasn’t like.....as pro-DC as most YABSers were given that it was Gail’s board and I mostly hung out at the X-boards and just swung by YABS once a week or so BECAUSE I couldn’t stand all the ass-kissing that went on at that board so that DC writers and artists would hang out and post regularly, LOL, like I’m pretty sure I remember Link as being one of the less....vehement of the pro-DC camp.

(Tbh, one of the biggest ways in which I disagreed with Gail on stuff is I UNDERSTOOD her feeling a need to be civil with other DC pros even if she didn’t like them personally, I just....couldn’t manage the same and didn’t feel any desire to try. Like for example, not sure how many people know who Ethan van Sciver is, but he’s a long time high profile DC artist, best known for his GL stuff.....but he used to hang around YABS pretty regularly. EvS is ALSO a haaaaaardcore conservative, Trumpian, and all around terrible person. And he always was.

Like he’d play it civil back then but his opinions were downright hateful on a variety of topics, particularly towards marginalized groups, but he was good at picking just the right moments to half-assedly walk something back the second he took something ‘too far’ - so like, the end result was he said it and everyone saw and remembered, but before anyone could react he’d drop the mea culpa card and be like oh I’m sorry I know that was out of line, I was just caught up in the moment and it’s all good cuz this is all friendly debate anyway right? We’re just talking here.

And he’d pull this crap all the time but because he was a DC pro, people would let him get away with it and warn people off coming down on him so he didn’t feel unwelcome at the board. Now the painfully ironic twist here is that shockingly, totally unexpectedly.....fast forward to about five or six years ago where good old Ethan burns a shit ton of bridges and decides well why not make things a dumpster fire for everyone in my vicinity....and he became the driving force behind a bunch of alt right comic book fans starting their own weak ass version of Gamergate, only called Comicsgate. It never was nearly as....big...as Gamergate was, but it was still ugly. And the thing is, Ethan sicced his sycophants on other industry pros he’d worked with over the years but always disagreed with on politics.....like really let the ugly fly....and most of these pros included Gail as well as a bunch of the other DC professionals from back in the YABS days.

Because thing was....that was literally WHY he’d hung out at YABS so much back then, despite being so far in disagreement with most of the progressive leaning board. He was always just interested in stirring shit up, he never actually had the slightest interest in debate or seeing the other side of anything....he just knew how to play the right cards to get the right people to come to his defense and cool things off rather than run him off, in the name of keeping things civil and such...all so he could start it all up again a couple weeks later.

And this is literally why that kind of thing doesn’t work for me at all. Because he wasn’t really that subtle even then, most people knew all along exactly what he was doing, and letting him get away with shit that would have gotten anyone else banned purely because he was a industry pro just meant that his opportunities to subject anyone in his vicinity to just vile, hateful shit ended up more protected than all the marginalized posters on that board who didn’t come to it to see his shit but had to constantly listen to it anyway because people were more interested in making excuses for him than making it comfortable for everyone else.

And in the end, he ended up turning on the very people who’d protected him from everyone else ripping into his hateful viewpoints with the directness they merited. Which just. Sigh. To me just smacks of a whole lot of unnecessary years spent putting up with his barely veiled bullshit until he didn’t bother even veiling it anymore....even though the reality is NOBODY was ever buying into his veil of it in the first place and we all knew what was right behind it all along. Anyway. Not that it matters LOL, but good old Eth, was one of the primary reasons I decided not to go into comics when I had a couple of opportunities come up, as I decided to focus my efforts on Hollywood at the time instead. Lmao, I figured if I was going to have to keep my mouth shut about coworkers whose opinions I vehemently disagreed with in the name of professionalism, I might as well focus on the profession that would pay me more money to keep that to myself. Look, at least capitalism is useful when ADHD and trying to pretend to be decisive about life choices.)

Long ramble nobody asked for aside, like I said, I can’t remember Link’s take on this particular topic but it’s likely the one I agreed with for the most part. My own take has always been that Miller sucks and if he said it chances are I said he was wrong because he is about everything and my religion is people saying so and by people I mean me. My religion’s also big on self-actualization. Not sure what else, I did just make it up and I think I’ll probably just stop there so I don’t accidentally make it a cult.

But yeah. I mean, maybe it’ll surprise people given how critical I am of the abusive elements of canon, but I’ve never applied the child endangerment/child soldier argument to sidekicks. It’s obviously not that they don’t get hurt in these stories and even traumatized, it’s not that they’re NOT in danger as kids....it’s just why I put such an emphasis on it being their choice to fight crime and be heroes and NOT something that Bruce or any other mentor or parent pushed them into.

Because this is one of the reasons why death of the author more often than not just doesn’t work for me. Authorial intent matters. Readers are always free to interpret a text however they want, regardless of authorial intent....but IF a writer has a specific intent behind a narrative choice, chances are most interpretations that refuse to align themselves with that viewpoint aren’t really all that RELEVANT to the story the writer was trying to tell in the first place.

Don’t get me wrong. Those other interpretations can still exist. They’re allowed to exist. People can abide by them all they want. But if someone’s takeaway from a story is a deliberate choice to read it entirely different from the story the writer intended it to be.....like, their interpretation is all well and good, but it’s not actually at all a RELEVANT commentary on or review of the story the writer was actually writing. They’re not actually saying the writer did a poor job of telling the story or was wrong in how they did it....because they’re not actually talking about the story the writer was actually telling.

Thus their commentary on it exists. But it’s just not that relevant. Because nothing in it even CAN offer an opinion on how else the writer could or should have written that story....because the story they ARE talking about isn’t the story the writer was even interested in writing.

Now, there are some times when authorial intent DOESNT matter. And when criticism of it is entirely fair and earned even if it’s of something the writer didn’t consciously or deliberately write into their story at all. But these things are almost ALWAYS unconscious. Unlike what I was just talking about, where the writer was very consciously writing the story a certain way for a reason, and thus people who aren’t interested in reading the story the way it was written to be read just can’t offer up a commentary that says anything useful or meaningful about the story that was actually written...the flip side of this is when the writer puts things they don’t intend into the text, but still are very much there all the same.

And this sort of thing applies to things like micro aggressions or racism, homophobia, sexism....things where a writer didn’t sit down intending to be offensive or alienate their readers but still put in things that they don’t think to view as offensive due to their own privilege and lack of experience EXPERIENCING the microaggressions that marginalized readers might be all TOO familiar with and thus can’t avoid reading into a passage where the writer might not have INTENDED harm or offense, but delivered it all the same. Because they didn’t think to put it into their story, they weren’t TRYING to....but they didn’t think to avoid putting it in there either, even if it’s because they didn’t know to until it’s pointed out to them that it’s there.

And this also applies to when the writer puts into their story, via whatever viewpoint they’re writing from, things that herald from their own viewpoints, how they view the world, even in terms of unconscious biases or expectations....but things that readers can still interpret as something they vehemently disagree with, even if the narrative seems to condone it. Because a lot of these viewpoints are things where the way they’re written....even just not coming out as clearly not condoning or agreeing it can effectively be read as tacitly condoning it.

So to apply all this to the idea of child sidekicks and child soldiers:

They’re not one and the same, and thus treating them as one and the same or interchangeable is IMO an inherently flawed perspective that doesn’t ever have anything USEFUL or RELEVANT to the stories that most people are trying to tell with child heroes and sidekicks.

With the notable exceptions of Miller, Ennis and certain other writers who by their own admission usually aren’t even trying to write about superheroes but rather deconstructions of the genre as a whole.....the vast majority of comic book writers, even the ones I dislike LOL, aren’t writing about child soldiers when they write characters like the Robins. Because CONSCIOUSLY, with INTENT, they’re already trying to write something completely different:

Child heroes and sidekicks are almost universally written to be child (although to be really fair, for the most part they’re largely teen) empowerment allegories. They’re youth power fantasies.

They’re stories about kids, about teens, getting to be the ones to save the world. About kids who don’t need adults to save them because they save themselves or their friends. Kids saving other people, other kids, grown adults. Stories about child HEROES are written as metaphors of hope for the future and the promise of the younger generations, or power fantasies where kids who feel helpless and powerless in their own lives can read these stories and vicariously imagine through the characters the idea of one day having the power to save themselves or other people, what that would be like, what they’d do with that.

But here’s the important part, and why people interpreting these teen and kid heroes as child soldiers doesn’t really offer relevant commentary to stories that are written to be allegorical youth power fantasies, regardless of authorial intent or death of the author....

And that’s because the key ingredient here, the thing that’s not really up for debate or open to interpretation....is that these stories can ONLY ever be allegorical.

Because like I said before, child heroes and child soldiers are not the same thing. There simply IS NO REAL WORLD EQUIVALENT for child and teen heroes as comic books style them.

And that’s why the fact that with most every child hero in comics, no adult makes them be a hero. They choose that for themselves, it’s almost universally characterized as a self-determination or empowerment moment rather than one of coercion like Miller likes to characterize it. His choice to characterize Bruce essentially drafting Dick as Robin to fight alongside him does nothing to provide commentary on any other superhero story, no matter what he’s told himself or his fans, because his story is the only one where Robin was drafted!

You can’t condemn narrative choices that nobody but you has actually written and then act like you’re saying something about any narrative other than your own fsjsjfshfzgzfhgs.

And you also can’t claim that you’re just seeing in the text something that’s inherently there and the other writers didn’t just see to avoid like I was talking about being a valid critique....because what’s being commented on there isn’t anything that was written unknowingly. Other writers consciously wrote the same things as Miller in terms of a child engaged in all that violence....but they deliberately wrote those moments to be metaphors of a kid that gets to save themselves and other people and CHOSE that, which is inherently opposed to the interpretation of a kid who is ONLY in harm’s way because he was forcibly drafted by a more powerful figure or force who cares neither what he wants or if he gets hurt.

These two ideas are mutually exclusive. They can not coexist in the same narrative because a character can not be powerless and self-empowering about the exact same specific choice. And thus anything that’s said about one of these narratives is inherently unable to say anything that’s relevant about the other....because the other is not written by its writer TO BE the kind of narrative that particular commentary is dissecting. It’s not TRYING to be that narrative, so no review of it can possibly say how flawed it’s execution is of an idea it’s not actually trying to execute.

And the differences between child heroes and child soldiers are not just limited to choosing that or being drafted and these other differences are equally key.

The biggest being that child heroes can not be seen as ‘basically’ the same thing as child soldiers.....UNLESS you are also perceiving adult heroes as basically the same thing as adult soldiers. And not even law enforcement or police or temporarily deputized or whatever else you want to spin it as....SOLDIERS, specifically. You don’t get to bring up something as charged as child soldiers and then get vague with your terminology when the close scrutiny that brings to your analogy stops working in your favor.

If sidekicks are child soldiers then you must in conjunction view adult superheroes as soldiers. And not in the abstract one man war on crime way Miller likes to consider Batman in his attempted deconstruction of superheroes. ACTUAL soldiers. If there’s no room in your comparison for child heroes to differentiate from real world child soldiers, there’s no wiggle room for the adults either.

And again, except for Miller, Ennis and specific others who by their own admissions are not TRYING to view superheroes the same way most other comic writers are, but fail to see that genre conventions are largely interpretive and thus seeing room for different interpretations of superheroes isn’t actually a commentary on how other people see and write those same heroes....like except for these select few, most writers are not writing superhero soldiers unless they’re Captain America or Captain Atom. Yes I know there are other superhero soldiers but let me be pithy. Even those aren’t really the same as their real world equivalents.

See, real soldiers don’t make distinctions about whether or not they’re willing to use guns. Their personal views on killing are not prioritized over whether they’ve been told to use lethal force to accomplish their objective. They have a chain of command. No matter the rationalization, they pledge their loyalty to singular nations and the aims and objectives of those specific nations over the abstract of acting in defense of the whole world.

Now again, maybe that applies to Captain Atom, but for the most part can you say the majority of comic book writers are TRYING to write Superman, Batman, Green Arrow, Wonder Woman etc through that lens? No. So while Miller really thinks he said something when he wrote his Batman with guns, fighting in the Middle East, killing people left and right, none of that actually ‘showed’ people that at the end of the day, Batman is no conceptually different from a real world soldier like. No all he actually did was write his own take on Batman, and said look, he’s a gun toting murderous asshole, huzzah I have deconstructed the modern superhero!

Like. Shut up Miller. Honestly.

But seriously. Superheroes do not have a real world equivalent and neither do child heroes. Even when it comes to nonpowered ones like the Batfam, they’re still deliberately written in a larger than life, four color perspective that requires a suspension of disbelief at the front door. We ALL know and understand that they aren’t a blue print for how to go out and be a real world vigilante. Even real world vigilantes exist. But they don’t look anything like the Batfam and it’s disingenuous to pretend they do for the sake of teh discourse. Nobody honestly believes that there is even the OPTION of going out one day and deciding to become a comic book style vigilante like one of the Batfam. It’s why even they’re termed superheroes despite the lack of superpowers. On a CONCEPTUAL level it’s understood that the stories being told about them require an extrahuman medium. You can not simultaneously write characters according to a mythic scale but then attempt to interpret that very writing on a real world one. It doesn’t work.

Which brings me to my final piece of this pie. Or puzzle. Idk I’ve been doing this response for awhile I forget what this is.

And that is again, the difference between interpreting a story in a way the author probably didn’t intend and understanding when a story isn’t meant to be interpreted in the way you’re trying to.

And this difference is how I can understand and reconcile the idea that it’s not inherently abusive for Bruce to allow his kids to fight crime at all, even though that would inherently be child endangerment in the real world, but at the same time, I can view him as abusive in other ways that don’t make allowances for the differences between real life and comics.

Basically it boils down to: CAN this specific element of a story be duplicated in real life or mirror a real life action or idea? Is there a direct parallel to a real world equivalent at all?

I can view Bruce fighting crime or saving the world alongside a child Robin without viewing that as child endangerment or inherently abusive, even when Robin gets hurt in the process....because there is no real world equivalent to those parts of a story. NO ONE, child or adult, is going out there and doing those things Batman and Robin style. Even the people who dress up in their own real life vigilante personas basically just do niche neighborhood things like walk people home from the bar. And even people doing real life vigilantism in terms of taking out criminals, like, that’s usually more of a personal revenge thing and not one where they’re trying to attract attention via a costumed persona. When you think real world Batman and Robin, nothing comes to mind for a reason.

And thus this says nothing inherently abusive about their dynamic, even according to real life parallels of child endangerment, because it’s not a real scenario. And thus it’s not TRYING to say anything about real life. It’s innately allegorical. It’s power fantasy emphasis on the fantasy.

In contrast, when you have something like Bruce hitting one of his kids.....no matter who the characters are, that specific interaction and the dynamic it presents DOES have a real world equivalent. That’s just parent/child abuse. And thus even if the writer didn’t intend for it to be interpreted that way, it’s still a valid interpretation. If it looks like a parent hitting their child, you can call it a parent hitting a child.

Batman and Robin fighting killer mind controlled plants together? Can’t happen. I’m not going to call it child endangerment when it’s not a realistic scenario and not meant to be, and I’ve already been presented with a valid alternative interpretation of this being a child empowered to help save people alongside his superhero father. There’s no point in condemning a dynamic that CANT be translated to a non allegory in real life.

But Bruce hitting his son? A father no matter how good hearted normally, being affected by extreme stress or grief or something else that makes his behavior take a turn for the worse and reach a point where he physically lashes out even if he never would have in the past? Nothing remotely allegorical about that. That story has too many real world equivalents to dismiss as having nothing to say about abuse in real life. Even if the writer didn’t intend for this to read as abusive because they were thinking of how much worse Dick has been hurt fighting alongside Bruce and never held that against him even though technically it was Bruce letting him get hurt....doesn’t matter. That interpretation still requires viewing through a lens that can’t exist in reality. No kid can ever excuse a parent hitting them by thinking of how much worse they got hurt taking down their local mob together and if he didn’t blame his dad for that cuz he wanted to do it to help people then how can he blame his dad for hurting him in a moment of anger? Umm. Doesn’t track see? They’re not the same thing at all.

Or another one that really bugs....I’ve heard people defend shipping a Robin while underage with an adult by saying if they’re old enough to make the choice to risk their life and have that choice respected, they’re old enough to choose who they want to be with. Umm. No. That’s not just apples and oranges that’s genetically modified grapes and seventeenth century cannonballs.

That logic doesn’t apply because neither of those things is the underage character choosing ANYTHING. They’re fictional. Everything they choose is just what their writer wrote them choosing. But again, one of those choices is one that an underage reader CANT choose in real life and have respected by every adult in their life, and thus will never have a bearing on their life as anything BUT an allegory they have to interpret and translate into something actionable they can apply to their life and choices. The other choice is them being written as presented with an option that’s actually a textbook real life grooming technique and something abusers use to justify the relationship they’re trying to cultivate with a minor by saying aren’t you mature for your age, aren’t you old enough to know what you want or to do this or that in which case you should be old enough to make this choice?

See the difference? Putting on a cape and going out to fight robots? Not directly applicable. Saying yes to the grown man saying he wants to have sex with you and thinks you’re old enough given this other choice you’ve made that highlights your maturity? That’s a choice that can be presented both to a Robin or a real life minor, but a writer justifying that choice for that Robin by saying well he’s already previously made this other choice that has no real life equivalent.....that creates a pretty misleading interpretation to people reading that story and not stopping to think through the distinctions between what KINDS of choices the writer is presenting these characters with and then justifying via their narrative.

And while I haven’t watched the video you’re referencing, anon, I would definitely agree that this is an example of how viewing child heroes as child soldiers is....not great. Aside from being cynical, misusing the idea of death of the author and helping to validate Miller’s choices and thus ego which is NEVER a good look LOL....it also intentionally or not paves the way for putting fictional types and MEANS of harm on an even playing field with real life ones and acting like it’s all one and the same with no distinctions to be drawn. And this doesn’t actually offer anything substantive or constructive about holding characters accountable for reasonable expectations of harm, when the sources of harm have no reasonable equivalent and thus only exist in the medium of being a youth power fantasy in which the child involved is fictional and can’t truly be harmed, with the harm done the second the scene ends and where the character can be back in fighting form the very next scene. Thus the only lingering element there IS the power fantasy.

Nope, all it actually does is muddy the waters in the REVERSE, and make it so it’s actually easier to justify or rationalize types and means of harm that DO have a real world equivalent, but by pointing to examples from a fictional medium and emphasizing the fictional character’s lack of being harmed while de-emphasizing the fact that the writer has full control over depicting this in a solely positive light that doesn’t ALLOW the fictional character any angle from which to voice that this CAN result in harm when not written for fictional characters according to a writer’s specific intent.

And that’s that about that. My opinion: you have it.

[louiseleblancdiggory]

omg can you write more of rowan, aelin, nino and aurora? any scene is fine. it doesnt need to be in the SH plot

Ngl it took me a hot minute to understand that SH meant Safe Haven lol. I did a scene with all four of them, but it is not in the SH plot and I wrote it in like half an hour so the quality can be heavily questioned. I hope you still enjoy it though, my best friend gave the green light to post it

Hallway fights

--

“I’ll fucking kill you, Malik. Stop oogling my mom.” Nino was saying the moment they walked into the classroom. Everyone was already seated, and Mr. Whitethorn was pointing at something on the board. Immediately all the heads turned to them.

The class wasn’t too big, only ten people other than the two of them. Phedre and Evangeline were seated by the windows, two vacant seats in front of them. Marion, Mr. Salvaterre’s daughter, was seated by Killian. A few of his teammates from hockey, one girl that never bothered to talk to them— only avoid Malik—, and Josh.

The little bitch.

“Oh shit.” Malik whispered, but Nino knew everyone could still hear them. “I think we are late.”

“No?!” Nino mocked his best friend, his ears turning pink at all the attention both of them were receiving. He looked at Mr. Whitethorn apologetically. “We are so sorry, Mr. W. We thought we still had five minutes.”

“Nino is shit at math, the poor boy can’t count to save his life, that’s why.” Malik said, going to his seat by Phedre and Evangeline, both of which looked like they were trying very hard not to laugh. Nino gave Malik a slap on the back of the head, sitting down while his classmates giggled.

Mr. Whitethorn looked slightly amused, and Nino thanked the gods for his history teacher being so chill. If it had been Salvaterre he would be hanging from the ceiling by his underwear. “Do I even want to know?”

His tone left clear that it was a rhetorical question, but Malik was completely oblivious to it.

“I was telling Nino that he would be more attractive if he looked like his mom.” Nino shot him a look and Eva started laughing uncontrollably. “He’s butthurt because he knows it’s the truth.”’

Phedre flicked him on the back of the head while Eva tried to contain her laughter.

“Malik is right, you know.” Killian, one of Nino’s best friend and teammate added, a slow smile taking upon his face. His arm was around Marion’s shoulder. “Nino would be prettier if he looked like aunt Ace.”

“Can we please stop talking about my mom?” Nino grunted.

“But…” Malik started again, but was interrupted by Mr. Whitethorn.

“Yes, we will stop talking about Mr. Galathynius’s mom and focus on the class.” His voice was hard, but his face didn’t show any type of anger or annoyance. Being such a small school, Nino and his friends had had Mr. W for three years now, and would probably get him again next year. The guy was calm and his humor reminded him of his mother’s, so he instantly liked the classes. It was such a small one that Mr. W usually gave them more freedom than bigger classes would get, which was also fucking good.

Nino sent a thank you to the gods the moment Mr. W returned to the presentation, happy that the subject wasn’t on how his friends thought his mom was hot anymore.

He finally relaxed, thinking that now the day would go by without further problems.

——————————

He had gotten into a fight.

Her calm, smart son had gotten into a fight.

Aelin was more confused than angry when she received a call from the school asking her to come pick Nino up after classes were over because he had shoved another kid into a locker. Nino had been living with her for six years now, and he had never even raised his fist. For him to get into a whole fight was something so out of the blue that Aelin was extremely worried.

She took Aurora out of the car, the six year old clinging to her neck like a little monkey. Aurora was usually loud and booming with life in the privacy of their home. She had no problem talking to her family, to her brother’s much older friends or to her best and only friend Lachlan, but unknown places always made her retreat into herself.

Aelin’s heels clinked against the school’s floor. She had left work as quick as possible, picking Aurora up and going to Nino’s high school. She still wore her blue navy pants and blazer, a white button down underneath. Usually, when going to the kids’ school, she wore something more casual but she didn’t have the time to change.

When she approached the secretary’s desk, Aurora took her hand out of her mouth, saying a little hi to announce their arrival. The old woman looked up at them and Aelin smiled at her.

“I’m here for Dominique? Dominique Galathynius?” She asked the secretary, her smile becoming a little embarrassed. “He got into a fight earlier?”

“Oh! Nino.” The old woman exclaimed, a smile taking up her face. “Lovely boy, always stops by in the morning to say hello.”

Aelin smiled with no little amount of pride. Nino was one of the most polite people she had ever met, always making sure everyone got attention and was feeling comfortable. “I got a call to pick him up. Do you know where he would be?”

“I believe Mr. Whitethorn has taken the responsibility for the fight, so you could look in his history class. Room 163, go down the hall, two lefts and one right.” The secretary pointed to the hallway. “So unlike your boy to get into a fight.”

“Yeah, I know.” Aelin sighed. “I’ll go see what that was about. Thank you so much for the help.”

Aelin’s heels against the floor was the only sound until she reached the hallways that Mr. Whitethorn’s room was supposed to be. There, in front of a class, stood a small group of teenagers Aelin knew way too well considering the amount of time they spent at her house.

“Do I want to know what he did?” She asked, and all heads turned to her. A chorus of “Hi, aunt Ace” sounded, and Evangeline even stepped up to give her godmother a quick hug. Without warning, she took Aurora from Aelin’s arms, the little girl delighted to be in her cousin’s embrace.

“It wasn’t his fault, aunt Ace.” Malik said, his voice barely restrained with anger.

“Josh is a fucking scumbag.” Killian added, and Aelin knew his harsh tone wasn’t directed at her but Marion gave him a little slap on the chest anyways. He looked down at the girl and she signed say sorry with her hands. Killian smiled sheepishly at her and then at Aelin. “Sorry, auntie.”

Aelin turned to Phedre, knowing the girl was probably the only one calm enough to explain. She was completely surprised by seeing the girl shimmering with anger. “Kil is right, and so is Malik. Josh is an asshole and it wasn’t Nino’s fault.”

“It really wasn’t, aunt Ace.” Eva added, looking at Aelin even as Aurora played with her hair.

Aelin nodded. She believed her son’s friends. They had been an inseparable group for six years now, and Aelin knew each one of these kids as her own.

He had a busted lip, Marion signed, her hands moving slowly. All of her friends, Nino included, had learned how to use sign language so Marion wouldn’t feel left out. Aelin had started learning too, but she was slower than Nino or even Aurora. Just so you don’t look surprised when you get in.

“Thanks, Ma.” She nodded and knocked on the door.

“Come in.”

When Aelin stepped into the room, her eyes went immediately to her son. His face had a purple bruise on the left side, making his green eyes stand out more, and his upper lip was busted. His inky black hair was a mess, but beyond that he seemed fine. Tired.

“Hey, mom.”

“Hey, sweetheart.” She said, her voice soft. She turned to the teacher, staring at him a second too long before saying. “Hello, Mr. Whitethorn.”

“Ms. Galathynius. I wish we could have meet under more adequate circumstances.” He was talking and Aelin took the chance to look at him. Despite the whole situation, she couldn’t help but almost gape at how handsome her son’s history teacher was. His skin was tanned under his button down white shirt, the sleeves rolled back to reveal a tattoo that went from his left wrist and disappeared into the shirt. Mr. Whitethorn was extremely tall, and Aelin found herself needing to look up at his face even with her heels on. She eyed his toned body, broad shoulders, strong jaw and the lines that made up his face. Soft mouth, straight nose and pine green eyes looking directly at her, he looked like he belonged more on the cover of some magazine than in a history class.

“What happened?” She asked, shaking her head slightly. She had to focus on her son right now, not on his teacher.

“Your son pushed me into a locker and started punching my face.” The other boy, Josh, spoke. Where Nino had one bruise and a split lip, the other boy looked ten times worse.

She knew it wasn’t the ideal reaction, but a little smugness bloomed inside her chest.

“He was talking shit and bothering Eva.” Nino looked at his mom, his chin raising. “I won’t apologize for protecting my cousin.”

She gave him a barely perceptible nod, and his body relaxed. She turned again to Mr. Whitethorn, finding him staring at the two boys. “It’s the beginning of the hockey season and the middle of the football one. I don’t want to punish neither of you because I know it can affect your ability to participate in the games. But I hear about the two of you throwing punches on the hallways one more time and I will personally make sure that the two of you are out of the teams. Understood?”

The two boys nodded, and Aelin knew that her son wouldn’t be getting into fights anymore. At least not on school ground. Nino loved playing hockey with Malik and Killian way too much.

“The two of you are dismissed. I have called your mom already since she is traveling, Josh, and the other part of your problem will be dealt directly with Principal Blueblood. Ms. Galathynius, a word please.” He nodded at the boys as they got up to leave.

Aelin grabbed Nino’s arm as he passed by her. “Everyone is waiting outside.”

He nodded stiffly, whispering in her ear. “Am I in trouble?”

“You should be, shouldn’t you?”

He smiled, knowing his mom well enough to know what that meant. “I’m sorry you had to leave work early because of this.”

“Next time do it outside school grounds, Dominique.” She joked. “Your sister is outside. Were you planning on going home with everyone?”

“Yeah, movie marathon night. I have her seat in my car so I can take her with us while you talk to Mr. W.” Aelin nodded and Nino smiled, giving her a kiss on the forehead. He turned to his teacher and grinned. “Bye, Mr. W.”

“Don’t get into trouble, Dominique.” He said, but there was a small smile on his lips.

“I never do.” He responded, leaving the room.

Aelin and Mr. Whitethorn stared at each other in silence for a few seconds.

“He’s a great kid.” He said, gesturing for her to sit. “I was completely shocked when I heard he had gotten into a fight.”

“You and I both. I never saw Nino being even slightly aggressive outside the ice, Mr. Whitethorn.”

“Please, call me Rowan, Ms. Galathynius.”

“Then you can call me Aelin.”

Rowan gave her a small smile, sighing before he talked again. “Josh was making rude comments about Evangeline being adopted. Teasing her endlessly, and when Nino stepped up to help his cousin, Josh turned his attention to him. Repeated things he had said to Eva and included you in the conversation. Phedre told me he was barely containing his anger when Marion stepped up and put a hand on his arm, tugging him away. It would have probably ended at that if Josh hadn’t made fun of Marion for being mute. That’s when your son punched him.”

Aelin’s blood boiled and she was tempted to go punch the boy herself. She had taken Nino and Aurora in when she was still in college, barely twenty at the time. With her parents’ help along with Lys— who was Eva’s guardian since she was eighteen— and Aedion’s, she managed to raise Nino and Aurora. They were her kids as much as they would have been if she was their biological mom. She had always feared they would hear uncomfortable comments about it, but never thought it would be bad to the point that her calm boy would beat one of his classmates to a pulp.

Aelin also half wished she could see Lorcan punching the kid.

“Will I seem like a bad mom if I smile at the fact my son punched a boy to a pulp?” She genuinely asked, looking at Rowan.

His smile was warm, eyes glinting with humor. “No, but I’m a teacher so don’t tell anyone I said that.”

Aelin’s laughed was loud and bright.

——————————

Nino and his friends were watching his mom talk to Mr. W. They were going home, but Eva was curious to know if their teacher was pissed, so she looked through the little glass rectangle on the door. Then Malik and Phedre. Then Killian pulled Marion along and Nino had no option but follow, Aurora asleep while he held her in piggy back.

They watched Mr. W talking to her, his face relaxed. Watched as his mom answered. Watched in absolute confusion as he smiled at Nino’s mom and she threw her head back, laughing.

“Bro.” Malik said, sounding as if he had found the Holy Grail while he watched Aelin and Rowan talking and smiling. “I have a fucking idea.”

Tags:

@abookishfreak @faerie-queen-fireheart @in-love-with-caramel-macchiato @jlinez @courtofjurdan @aelinfeyreeleven945tbln @ladywitchling @maastrash @morganofthewildfire @queen-of-glass

[idealnreal]

Maruki Palace over-analysis (pt.1)

Thank you for @appleyjuiceboy​ for helping me out with this and entertaining my brainrot. and to @goalexstark​ for requesting this :D Now buckle in, put on gentle madman, and a whole lot of insanity under the cut

So the best place to start is outside the palace. Specifically, the external architecture of the palace. It’s clearly very contemporary even futuristic in its design, while holding an organic form. It’s design reminds me of rotating tower concepts with the way the first half of the tower curves and twists. And the palace itself does seem to rotate and shift, especially the components in the top half -- accentuating the organic and dynamic futuristic design. However, in comparison with most contemporary and organic architectural designs, the external architecture isn’t minimalist. There are various components, that make the design seem chaotic and even Extra. Of course this is a palace, and we should expect that.

The middle section of the palace is a twisting glass ‘stairway’, surrounding a golden almost ‘woven’ like structure. There is an elevator shaft running through the middle of it. This elevator leads to the garden of eden section of the palace. While the peak is a hologram of a globe, surrounding an amorphous golden form -- that seems to be the source of the light. Strangely enough we don’t see the tree of eden from outside. That would’ve been neat. But alas. The we come to the rotating rings, bound by these golden ‘wires’, and have these camera lenses attached to them.

So, the architectural style of the lab is futuristic, organic and dynamic -- and completely whack. This reflects how he thinks that his new reality is also effectively a new way, a new future -- breaking past the confines and rules of even the most contemporary of architectural design, and breaking past the confines and rules of life and reality.

All throughout the exterior of the palace there are these limelights and cameras, rotating about, focusing it’s lenses. This alludes to how he gives each patient his full attention, to be the centre of attention, to be in-focus. Alternatively, it could also suggest an over protective, surveying/ supervising mental state -- ever watchful for anyone in pain.

The entrance’s design, in comparison with the rest of the exterior, seems very straightforward. If you take away the glass atrium, the grey structure in the middle would actually be very imposing. The gold ‘wires’ arcs also surround this area, giving it an organic and dynamic design. Note that these aren’t doors, but an elevator. From the get go, Maruki is taking patients up, above ground.

Stepping out of the elevator, from the dark and up a flight of steps, into the light, we are greeted by a flight of doves-- accentuating the idea that the entrance hall is an open-aired space despite being indoors. This becomes a theme across the palace, going back and forth from high-ceiling and open-aired sections, to very closed and claustrophobic corridors. There are also those golden ‘wire’ arches decorating the ceiling of this entrance hall. In contemporary architecture, big atriums and open-aired spaces are meant to promote airflow and natural light, to give visitors a sense of ease and relaxation, while also being a respite from any harsh conditions outdoors. The sound of the doves taking flight add on to the peaceful and calm atmosphere.

Like all information boards, Maruki is showing people the benefits of his research, how it works, and most importantly, evidence that it does work -- that it is for the best. The amount of detail and the number of charts on these boards suggest that he is being transparent with his research -- and that it is scientifically proven. Of course, no one real (beyond the phantom thieves, shibusawa and the professor) has read this research. The people outside who’s cognitions he had changed, did not need to read this research -- they only needed to wish for happiness. Even so, these boards reflect his belief that if people know about his research, about how it works, they can be convinced into accepting his help. The cognitions who talk in the entrance hall also tell the PT to give it a try, and were understanding of any hesitance and were reassuring.

Also notice that the walls of the hall are lined with flower-beds, specifically wildflowers -- Calling back to Rumi’s love for the wild-flower field and Maruki’s youth with her. It also fits into the open-ness of this section that these are not potted deliberately arranged plants, and it would seem that these flowers just grew out in the patch of dirt and grass left for them.

Here, we come to the reception hall, where there are a few components to note. The first is probably the huge fan topping off the very high glass ceiling -- again, adding to the idea that this palace is all about natural light, air circulation and a breezy peacefulness. Then we have those golden wires/cable things (they actually remind me of computer cables), wrapped around these cameras and helping to prop them up and move them. THese cameras are also propped up by these black thin wires -- and the gold and the black -- hinting that there is more going on here. On the huge cameras themselves, now they seem more like surveillance cameras than the camera lenses outside. Adding credence to the idea that this is a big brother type situation, but one that is just reALLY keen on making sure everyone isn’t suffering and is happy.

The design of the reception itself is well organised, with lined benches and the calling numbers on full display. When i first played this section i thought that this was more like a hospital -- not a lab.

The next section is this green house looking area, with a tree and a garden in the middle and four TV screens. We don’t know if these screens are meant to play memories of anyone who comes by but that’s what we see-- Sumire walking in as her father is crying over Kasumi’s body. Importantly, after this section we see a cognition of Kasumi who sees and waves at Sumire, and then once we meet Maruki, he shows us another video from Sumire’s POV of the accident. Also the room we see the cognition of Kasumi and meet Maruki is a gymnastics arena.

This is important because we know that this is Maruki’s palace, and not Sumire’s. How is it that these POV memories are in this palace, and that Maruki would have a cognition of Kasumi? Of course one can argue that he created these memories and the cognition of Kasumi based on what he knows of Sumire/Kasumi -- and was doing this to manipulate her. But this definitely isn’t the case. He has never met Kasumi, and from what we can tell, he only had one session with Sumire, who didn’t really give any details of the accident itself to Maruki, or speak of her father to him. I doubt that Sumire as Kasumi would’ve spoken to Maruki about the accident after -- as she was more concerned about her gymnastic performance.

Perhaps this will get to personal headcanon territory, because the game doesn’t give us any answers on this. So Maruki is definitely an empath, and while that doesn’t give him the affinity to gain other people’s memories -- I believe that with Azathoth’s power and with this palace, it does. We know that he can see into people’s minds and know their pains and wishes -- which would very likely come in the form of memories -- whether it be persona users or mementos dwellers. Also, being an empath means that he can feel what another is feeling. Or rather if i can describe it -- letting someone walk through the door and change the furniture around. This is Maruki’s palace, and yet he is allowing Sumire to walk in and see her own memories from her point of view. Therefore, while i think that Maruki has access to some of these memories, they’re supplemented and brought into focus by the presence of Sumire. At least that’s what my hc is.

Speaking of the gymnastics arena, we arrive at our first colour switch of this palace. Dark purples and violets. It doesnt look like the walls or floors are purples/dark -- but instead some purple light, and that the big lights aren’t turned on on purpose. Like discussed before, this seems very much like Sumire’s section of the palace -- and Maruki allowing her to ‘move the furniture’

Something else to note thanks to juicedup14 from twitter for these translations of the banners, tickertape/crawler text, “We’ll watch over you always” “ The ideal reality you haven’t seen is waiting for you” “ May the world be a happy place where no one suffers”

And these posters, translated “ Let’s keep our hearts healthy”.

After a week we return to the palace and head to the Auditorium. This time, this is definitely Maruki’s section of the palace. Unlike the Arena, the Auditorium is a circular and bright hall, flanked all around with seats and podiums and screens for presentations. Yes, Maruki’s cognitions of people are fuckin creepy, but this is where they are the creepiest. They’re all sitting in rows, faceless and happy -- and have their hands together clapping. There is also a hologram of the globe topping off the ceiling -- like the hologram globe outside. This is where Maruki’s research will and has gained global recognition -- presented to thousands, and seen as the panacea to all ills and suffering of the world.

I went into more detail in my analysis of the shadows, but tldr; the cult-like vibe this palace, and especially this room, gives. However this ‘religion’ is founded on research, factual and scientific evidence. Which is why we have those presentation screens and all the information boards in this first third of the palace. And given how his research has been suppressed and ignored for years, it makes sense if those cognitions are his converted detractors, his followers, as well as his ‘patients’. Maruki doesn’t deny wanting his research to be recognised, and this is what this room is dedicated to. But like he says, and ultimately what the rest of this palace will show -- Maruki wants to heal the world at whatever the cost.

And with this i’ll probably close this off here. I reckon this will be one of four or five parts, kinda split to how the game splits this palace. This will be a long and wild ride ladies gents and enbees. Oof.

[sainadazai]

When your crush is angry all the time

Ch.4

I wanna be an intern too, you ragedy ann looking ass hoe 😠



Y/n pov

°•○●○•°•○●○•°

All goes well when you are ignorant is what my dear best friend would say to me now, as I sit in the very back of the class unfocused on how our teacher is introducing an activity I have no chance of participating in. All I knew was that when Mr. Aizawa walked up to the board and wrote names of people getting offers, I wasn't one of them. Not that I expected to be, considering I wasn't in the sports festival, let alone the school at all back then. 

However, I did notice a small inconsistency in the order of the most offers. I was pretty sure that boom boom had gotten first place in the festival, him being there is what convinced me to transfer, but his name was actually second on the board. 

Todoroki had taken the place of first as far as offers were concerned. Todoroki the nice boy who I used to meet when I snuck away from my fucking prison cell. Call me privileged for complaining about living in a mansion All my life, but I much prefer being here. With common folk. They ground me. 

I peeked up from my phone at the red and white head of hair in front of me, he didn't seem all that fazed. Although maybe it was just the lack of seeing his face that made me believe he couldn't care less about all but one of those offers. Still, his business is his, and my business is the new Ao3 update on my favorite chrollo lucilfer fanfiction. What a babe. 

I decided that the class as of right now would be of no importance to me, considering I will have no offers, and bakugou-the reason I came here- hates me like I'm a piece of gum stuck under his shoe.  Through that conclusion I allowed myself to dissolve into the world of hxh and forget about how boring this world is. 

Could my power beat Killua or go in a fight? I mean, it doesn't enhance my strength like they did trying to get into Killua's house so physically they must be stronger. 

"Y/n! Is there something you would like to share with the class?"

Mr.Aizawas voice seemed almost shot at me as my gaze rose from my phone in my lap to meet him at the front of the room. He looked displeased to say the least. Well good for him, im displeased too, I might not be able to beat a fucking twelve year old in combat. 

"Huh?"

"You were grumbling, what's so important you had to tell us, hm?"

I thought it through for a second- just kidding, I never think anything through. 

"Oh, well I wasn't sure if I could beat Gon in a fight, but I'm not coming to the realization that if Chrollo is my boyfriend, I shouldn't have to fight anyone at all. I can just be a pretty face in the backgrounds and then after he wins for me i'll suck his-"

"Enough, y/n." Mr.Aizawa no longer held a tired looking face, his eyes were wide and an uncomfortable cringed was set on his face. As I peered at the rest of the class many also had shocked eyes, but unlike our teacher, held faint blushes. 

Minus midoriya, his face was completely red and his eyes void of life. I must've killed him, huh. 

"Wait!"

In an attempt to regain some dignity, I tried to correct myself.

"I would....not suck his-?"

"Don't even say it, shitty princess !"

"Woah bakugou, you spoke to me on purpose!?"

"Shut up!"

"Hey, how come you call me princess, you like me or something?"

He growled at that, neither of us paying mind to the fact that everyone in the class was either dead from nosebleeds or extremely uncomfortable and staring at us.  

"Its cuz you act fucking entitled like a princess"

"I'll be your pillow princes-"

"Enough!" A robotic-like hand sliced the air in front of me. The voice sounded firm, almost more teacher-like than our teacher's voice. I followed my gaze up the hand, not failing to notice how as I drew up the guy's arm his muscles only seemed to get bigger and bigger and- iida? 

"Oh class rep-"

"Y/n this vulgar language and border-line harassment needs to cease immediately. I will not tolerante overtly sexual language and acts in this class-"

As he was speaking I noticed something ironic about the situation. If everyone here didn't like sexual jokes or banter, how were they so flustered at comments that objectively should be unknown to them. 

"How did you know what I meant, iida?" I rasped in a low sultry voice, allowing my fingers to dance up his arm starting at the wrist in front of my face. 

I heard a few chuckles from, who I would say are the only two people enjoying this situation: kaminari and...stinky mineta. Iida's face grew more red than previously and the arms in front of me began shaking. 

"Mr.Aizawa it seems I've disarmed the robot. Is there a restart button or something?" I question with a serious face using the search as an excuse to wonder my eyes all over his body. Perverted? Yes. Rightfully attracted to this giant hunk of a nerd. Yes ×10. 

"No, there is not." Todoroki, who was in front of me, finally turned around to address me. I guess he was unfazed by my words. Looks like someone here can be cool. Whether he is okay because he is more comfortable with sexual jokes, or because he has yet to pick up on them, its nice that somebody in here can still function. Otherwise, I'd feel like a nuisance. 

"Y/n I'm not really sure how to- let's just say to have detention with your m- midnight. Detention. Yeah." Aizawa publicly convinced himself of my punishment? 

"Okay"

"Now, back to this, even if you didn't get any offers ALL of you will have an internship" 

And so went on the class, kids chose their hero names, not me though. I wasn't even sure I wanted to be a hero at all, this was just a little less boring and sad than the way I lived before. This school had people who laughed in joy, not just to mask the pain. That was the real benefit, not being a hero, or being strong. Likely no one here realized that there were many places where none of this joy was possible. 

Some of the kids in class gave me suggestions for a hero name, but I didn't like them anyway. They lacked personality, and while I have many adjectives to describe my personality, my life, none of them are all that heroic. 

"Dark element"

"Girl who will die if her quirk doesnt like its environment" 

See, I'm not the best at this. Even bakugan names had some sense to it...well no. I'd say we're about the same, but still. Ugh. 

~timeskip~ 

Bakugou pov 😠

She came up with no hero names. Fucking entitled brat. Everyone at this lunch table seems to have no problem with the fact that she is here, just happy to have another pair of tits to stare at like perverts. Their gross. I bet she doesn't even want to be a hero, she sure as hell doesn't act like it. We don't even know what her whole quirk is. Ive seen her do that plant shit a couple times, fucking with flowers or whatever. Still, there's more to it. Something we don't know, at least. Cuz in the middle of class she gets up and whispers to Aizawa and he just lets her go. Where the fuck does she go? 

Interrupts class, got into the school because her moms a teacher, won't use her quirk. What a nuisance, I can't believe she is not expelled yet. Plus those bullshit sex jokes are so shitty. She is obviously faking something when she does them. Not like midnight, who always at least seems like she means that gross shit. 

"Hey, who did you guys choose for your internship? I haven't chosen yet."

"The number three hero guy," I spoke, knowing I'm the only person here who already chose. 

"Really? Best jeanist! That's so cool, but are you sure that for you bakugou?" Shitty hair raised a shitty brow at me. 

"What the hell is that supposed to mean!?"

"Just that he seems pretty...uptight..for you?" Dunceface added, but he spoke like it was a question. Of course he is the hero for me, he is the highest ranting hero on my list. If I wanna be number one, I gotta train with the best. 

If I go to his agency I'm sure there will be a lot more action, since he is so high ranking. Then i'll get some real experience kicking villain ass, well, other than the USJ. 

"Of course he is the right option!"

"Woahhh~"

Shit. It's her voice. I honestly should applaud her for using it less often around me but, how can one small girl be so goddamn annoying. I don't even know what she has to say and I already wish she would just put a sock in it. How can someone so entitled like her, probably never had to lift a finger, walk  over here and talk like she has something to say. 

"You're working with the best jeanist! So cool, one time he saved me from a group of rapist guys, it was awesome with all these strings everywhere and I could only see half of his face. Oh and he had goofy hair too!"

Oh. I didn't really know how to respond to the girl who looked so excited about almost being violated. Another thing wrong with her? I looked back at the other people at the table to see if they knew how to respond to something like that. 

Dunceface was frozen, tape arms were frozen, shitty hair was frozen, and alíen eyes were looking like a lost puppy and trying not to cry. 

It didnt seem like the shutty princess was exactly understanding how what she just yelled was making things weird. She just stood there expectantly. She kinda looked like she thought being raped was something that must happen to everyone. Did she think that? Wouldn't put it past her weird ass. 

"Uhm...anyways, i'm sure you'll do awesome, he likes to put boys in tight jeans. Wish I could intern too, I'd love to see that boom boom~" she winked. 

A perverted joke...and then she had the audacity to wink at me. 

"You wish you could see me in tight jeans, shitty extra!"

"I know...thats what a I just said." She dead panned, blinking a couple times at me. 

"Tch, screw you!"

"I would-" 

"Can it, i don't wanna hear your shitty voice anymore"

The girl stopped herself after my words, pushing all her hair behind her head, except for the two blond stands in the front. 

(You don't have to acknowledge these if you don't want, but I made it so that they change color depending on what element your using and I thought it was hot*if you have short hair, then you just got a lil nishinoya type thing 🥰)

Lifted her obnoxious hands that moved around while she talked and made a zipper-like motion over her lips. Then she just stood there looking at me. I really wanted to just let her stand there and go back to eating. Ignore her completely and let her hope fizzle out and die or something like that. 

Yet here I am, still looking at her. Silently. Wishing she made a stupid joke so that I could stop flickering between those images I'd seen of her dancing. How even though ballet is a princess fucking dance, the pictures felt nice. Like if I was watching it live I would probably be unable to criticize it. That pissed me off, because I want to hate everything about her, but I can't hate those photos. Where she looks like she is flying, without any need for a quirk.

I see her in that weird gown, and now, in the UA uniform. I see her looking respectable, formal, and serious. Then I see her stupid little smirk as she takes pride in being able to shut up for more than a minute. 

"Why are you still standing there?"

Instead of answering, she took her hand up again, made a pinch with her fingers and unzipped her mouth. 

"I was enjoying the look in your eyes."she smiled. 

The look in my eyes? Could she tell I was seeing two different people? What the hell does that even mean? Even said it without that shitty flirt voice. Like she meant it. 

"You tryna make fun of me?"I stood up from the table to get in her face.

"Not right now, maybe later, I gotta do something." She smiled sincerely at me, for a second as she walked away, I forgot about how this conversation started. What a wierd fucking girl. I'll never respect her as a hero. Tch. (Yes, its canon he tchs even in his thoughts) 

3rd person POV 

Y/n briskly walked out of the cafeteria with a new goal in mind. She would come to remember how maybe being oblivious was a benefit in some ways, but for now, she had a clear plan .

"Mr.Aizawa, let me do an internship."

"You weren't in the festival, I can't just hand you to a hero who has no idea what you can do, y/n."

"Well, you know what I can do, right?"

"No. I'm not doing internships. Stop asking."

"That's not what I meant! You can just tell them, or I could, it's not that hard to explain. Just say i'm all- powerful or some play on words like 'she's got all the right elements' hehe, see how i mimicked your voice there?" Y/n grinned like a child. She was proud of herself. 

"No. Still not happening."

"I wanna be an intern too, you raggedy ann looking ass hoe" 

"Y/n, it doesn't make sense, insulting me to get what you want?"

"Maybe it doesn't, but I bet you feel real insecure about your hair right now."

"You already have detention, what more do you want!"

"An internship, I wanna do one with kamui Woods, I have a good reason, too. As far as my quirk control, i'm the weakest with earth, the aspect that allows me to grow and manipulate plants and stuff. That's why I've only been using that part of it all month. Im trying to get her up to speed so I can start using all four at once. He is like a tres guy, right? He manipulates earth all day long. He could teach me a lot, and that aspect of my quirk would suit his well. Please!?!?!?"

If the girl had just asked again in a normal way, his answer would have been the same. However Aizawa was taken aback to hear how much thought she put into this. From the stories of the teachers lounge, he came to understand her big life goal, was to rely fully on a rich man or woman, and do nothing at all forever. Just to try and forget about the terrible life she was destined to have because of that quirk.

This side of her was something he could not even her mother had seen, and it prompted him to speak those words she wanted to hear so badly.

"Fine." 

[chicagopd2020]

New Beginnings Are Good For Everyone Ch.5

Waking up the next morning was one of the easiest things she ever done, which was weird because she hated monday mornings so much. But getting up and going through her morning routine just to make sure everything is right before she heads out for her first day as member of the Chicago PD Intellgence Unit. Kim had a little extra pep in her step and she was happy about it because it hadnt been there in a long time. She grabbed her jacket & keys ready to walk out the door. She stops for coffee to make sure that doesnt hit a wall in the middle of the day.

Kim walks into the station and she sees Sargent Platt, she decides that the best thing to do is to talk to her and to see what she is suppose to do. She stands there silently as Sargent Platt finishes the conversation with the officers in blue. When Trudy looks up and notices Kim she tells the officers to move along. She welcomes her back and asks if she is ready for her first day.

Kim replies happily that she was more than ready to prove herself to everyone. She kept small conversation with Trudy until Trudy looks behind her and notices one of the members of the Intelligence Unit.

Upton?

Yes Sargent?

You know Agent Kim Burgess?

Yes I know Kim

Well would mind buzzing her upstairs with you just until we can get her into the system.

Of course, follow me Kim and show you where you are going to start spending most of your time

Oh I cant wait.

I promise you that will change, I love my job but you have no time for a personal life.

I guess that it is a good thing that I am a woman focusing on her career right now and not a romantic relationship.

They carry on with their conversation with their small climb of the stairs, Hailey walks her to Voights office and wishes her good luck even though she knows she will see her in just a couple mins.

Kim welcome to your first day as a memeber of intellgence, just want to go over a few things while we wait on the last couple people to show up. He starts going over the rules and not that there was many rules but he lives strongly by the few rules that he has.

Kim has noticed that Hank Voight is not your normal Sargent but she wasnt wanting normal she was just wanting to serve justice for the city of Chicago. She continues to listen intently to what Voight is saying taking everything he was saying to the heart so she knows what not to do to get on his bad side. I am going to give you a few weeks to study everything, I have set up your test in two weeks for you detective exam. The moment finally comes to where he asks if she had any questions

I will make sure that I study up on everything that I need to know so that I can pass the test of my first try. I say things like that so I can keep it in my mind that I will pass the test and that I can do anything I put my mind to.

I know that everyone is partnered up with someone, I was just curious who my partner was going to be? I know that no matter who I am with that I will have a great partner. This team just seems like they have each others back no matter if they are actually partners or not.

That we do Kim we are family here, Whatever one member of the intellgence is going through everyone feels the pain, I know that it is weird to say buts it true. We have our fights like any of family but at the end of the day we will have each others back no matter what.

That is exactly what I want because at the FBI yes it was everyone worked as a team but at the end of the day everyone was only watching out for theirselves and if they had the chance to do it they would throw someone under the bus in a heartbeat. That was until Erin came I knew that she would have my back no matter what and she was the only thing that I was going to the miss about it and that was it.

Good to hear Kim, he looks out the window and notices that the whole team is here. Come on lets go out to the bullpin and I will let everyone know all at once who you are going to partnered with.

The door opens and everyones eyes looks toward the door and sees Kim and Hank exiting, Hank finally speaks up, So as everyone of you know Agent Burgess as of today is officially a member of Intellgence and I think she is going to be an amazing addition to the team and I want you all to make her feel at welcome. So as of today Burgess you are going to partnered up with Halstead, Upton you will be with Ruzek and Atwater you will be Olinksy.

Hailey showed Kim where her desk would be, which was actually her old desk. Hank liked the partners to be close to each other that shows they can work as a team not only on the street but in the close quarters of an office.

The first couple hours was kind of quiet just everyone going over cases they had been working on. When Voight walks out of the office and catches all of their attenion.

We have a case, We are looking at a small drug smuggling team that is somewhat new to the city, and one of the leaders of the team is trying to look normal or something because he has a nine to five job and he doesnt live in these high priced homes to make it not look so obvious but the others, they are staying hid very well because there has been no trace of any clues as to who any of his partners are. This is Lorenzo Lopez he is best known as Enzo.

Kim finally looks away from the file in her hands and takes a look at the picture hanging on the board, and her eyes go huge. She looks over a Jay and they share this look knowing that this was the neighbor that Jay thought was very sketchy. Voight must have caught onto that look, cause he questioned them.

What is that look the two of you just shared?

Well it turns out that he lives in our building and right next door to Kim. He just moved into the apartment a few weeks ago and he seemed kind of sketchy but I never really thought anything of it.

Kim was just lost in her thoughts that she didnt really hear the conversation that was going on. Until Jay tapped her shoulder to get her attention. She slightly jumped that never happens, she just thought that she left him in the past and now she was going to be apart of the team to send him to prison and honestly she cant say that she was upset about it. It was one of the main reasons that she left him she knew that the business that he was in wasnt legal and there was no way in hell that she was going to let him mess up her career.

Kim are you alright?

Yeah, Im just thinking about someway, anyway that we can take him down.

Jay wasnt buying it but it was her first day he wasnt going to push the boundaries just yet. So he just let it go for now.

Halstead you and Burgess go talk to your CI'S and see if they know anything about this. Everyone just keep digging into his past and see what you can dig up.

Kim heard the last sentence and knew that she had to tell someone about her connection to the suspect before someone actually figured it out and wonder why she didnt tell them, so who is best to tell then her partner.

They get into Jay's truck and head out and she knew that if she didnt talk about it now that she never would. She lets out this deep breathe

Jay I need to tell you something.

You can tell me anything. Im here for you

Its about the suspect that we are looking into, you know last night when I said something under my breathe about our sketchy neighbor

Yeah, what about it?

Well, what I didnt tell you is that I know Enzo very very well

How well?

As in we were together for over a year

What?!?!

Yeah, when we first met he was normal like any other guy but then the longer that we were together its like I just didnt get the same vibe from him that I used to. When we would spend time together I would feel uneasy that something could go wrong at any minute. So after that night I just told him that I think that it was best if we seen other people and that I didnt see a future with him. Lets just say that he didnt take it the best and i had to end up moving somewhere else but a few weeks before I found out that I got the job here I felt as if I was being followed and yet somehow we end being neighbors. I didnt want to think nothing much about it when I first set eyes on him but it just seems like he found out from someone that I was moving here and just thought that maybe if he lived here first that I wouldnt think nothing about it.

Kim you definetly have to tell Voight about this

I know I just didnt think that I would ever see him again

Even though you never thought you would see him again doesnt change anything he is our main suspect and you could be the reason he is in Chicago and that may actually lead us to him, I would never actually make you do anything that would put you in danger I hope you know this

I do know this, but whatever helps put him behind bars quicker I am willing to help

Jay talked to a couple of his CI'S and they were not much help, So they started back toward the station when Halstead got a message with an address to meet the rest of the team. As they arrived they seen the team surrounding something on the ground and as they made it to their side they seen that it was a woman who couldnt have been not much older than 25 and she was laying there with a cut throat.

Do we think that this has anything to do with Enzo and his men? Kim questioned

We wont know anything until we get the autopsy back. Says Voight

Sarge is there anyway that I can have a word with you

Yeah, sure

They walked far enough away that nobody would be able to hear what they were talking about. She told him everything that she told Jay and hoped that whatever she told him would help.

Kim I know that wasnt easy to say but I am glad that you told me before we had to find it out on our own and then it would have looked bad on your end and looked like you were hiding something.

Thats what I thought and Jay told me that I should tell you right away and I feel so much better now that I did.

They join back up with the team and all head back to the station. Once they make it back to the station  everyone gathers around the board and Voight feels the team in on everything you told him and they tried to figure out what was the best way they could get his guards down long enough for someone to get into his place to bug his apartment or even his phone.

Kim was the first person to speak up.

I think we know the only person that he is going to even let into his apartment is me

Kim you dont have to do this...Voight and Jay say at the same time

Your right I dont but I know that this is my job and that it is the right thing to do. You could always be close enough to that if I feel threathened that you will be right there.

If you are sure that you want to do this then we will do it

Its the furthest from what I want to do but its what I know needs to be done.

Alright everyone we will put everything in motion tonight. So get ready

Kim cant believe she is the one that thought of this but I think in the end its the only thing that would have made sense, Its the only way they will be able to bust him 

[villanevest]

you know what the ke fandom needs more of? more AU fic. like gimme some chaotic college au or coffee shop au or neighbors au

U are so right. Honestly hit me with ur suggestions.

I didn’t want to leave you waiting until any suggestions came in or my brain started working so here’s my totally lame, unsolicited and rushed dot-point take on a Villaneve in the film industry:

- Villanelle is a notoriously bratty but EXTREMELY talented actress

- like she’s a total costume thief and honestly kind of difficult to handle on set if Konstantin (her manager) isn’t around

- but she’s also a one-take wonder when she wants to be, she can just turn on the character, bam, nail it, then go back to the Kraft table and hoard doughnuts

- she starts out doing short films and indies and then swans right into big pictures in that way that almost NOBODY does, but she does

- it’s never occurred to Villanelle that everything wouldn’t fall into place for her, and it’s almost like through sheer force of confidence that it actually does.. people just don’t question her because she’s so obviously got It

- she’s all over the place, doing the most eclectic projects, bouncing from superhero flicks to deep dramas

- she’s a magazine darling bc she has the wildest fashion sense, but in interviews she’s chatty and conspiratorial and funny in this way that means you don’t really notice she hasn’t actually told you anything real about her until much later

- anyway Villanelle wraps the last block for her latest movie and then she’s herded off to London to do a music video with Sebastian, who she’s really not that fond of (she doesnt even listen to his songs)

- but Konstantin’s management group also reps him so she’s bribed into it

- Eve is a director (and aspiring screenwriter), and she’s good, she’s really fucking good, but she’s mostly stuck doing music videos that she’s not all that interested in because her boss Frank won’t cut her a break

- he always promises that “after this next one” he’ll send her through to one of his television buddies, but he never does

- “oh Eve, you’re too good here, just let it go”

- in her spare time, Eve’s writing a TV series, and it’s Ready, and having something she’s happy with and passionate about just makes the sets she’s on seem even more stagnant

- Kenny, an AD she’s had on a couple of projects (who is Very Supportive of her show idea), is the son of Carolyn Martens, who is like THE head of creative development at a huge production company

- and he manages to accidentally-on-purpose get them to run into each other so Eve has a few minutes to pitch

- and Carolyn tells Eve she likes her idea, but it’s kind of off-beat, really fresh in that shiny-new way that makes dusty dinosaur investors uncertain about profit margins

- like maybe it’s Too New, too much of a gamble

- but she says if Eve can find a way to make it more of a sure thing then she is IN

- so then Eve is directing the music video of this (honestly kinda basic) dude singer and this famous actress chick is gonna be in it

- Hugo their sound guy is Hype to meet her

- but Elena is like “yeah I’ve heard she’s a Problem” so Eve is all okay, Here We Go

- and then she sees Villanelle and there’s this whole stretched moment of just seeing her

- and then she remembers hey she saw this woman once in an arthouse film and she was incredible

- and obv That’s why her heart is doing That

- Eve just admires talent when she sees it, okay??

- and Villanelle as always goes from zero to a hundred

- like she can barely be bothered to be there but then she sees Eve and it’s Wow I Can’t Believe Music Videos Are My Actual Passion

- and yes Villanelle’s beyond into it but she’s also an ass, and like, what’s she going to do, NOT try to drive Eve up the wall? As if

- she Has to know what Eve looks like flustered

- has to know if Villanelle can fluster her into dragging her into some props closet and tearing her clothes off 

- so from Eve’s side

- Elena’s sources from wardrobe departments across the country were not kidding

- Villanelle is a total nightmare

- but also not

- like every time Eve tells her to do or try something she always pushes back, has to ask fifty But Why questions

- it’s impossible to stay frustrated with her though bc once she’s on board she absolutely brings it, will keep going until she’s got it perfect

- and then once Eve can see she’s got that to work with she starts trying to really push too, to see what she can get out of her

- but… It’s a music video, not an Academy contender, so they get caught up in this “well how about this” back and forth until Kenny’s like… Uh Eve remember we only have like five days to shoot this whole thing

- Elena thinks it’s funny because there’s going to be a HUGE disparity between Sebastian’s fumbling help-I’m-just-here-to-sing acting and Villanelle’s totally committed nuanced performance 

- then suddenly they’re done, and it’s been this total blur and Eve is kind of on a high from it because it’s the closest she’s come in so long to being able to make something she’s actually engaged with, that means something

- and she’s not willing to trudge back to Basic Town so she bites the bullet and just goes for it, like Fuck Frank

- and yeah Sebastian is … A little ordinary… But he’s commercially successful and has a pull with the 18-35s, so Eve approaches him after they’ve wrapped

- she pitches him being the featured artist on the soundtrack of her TV show

- he gets exposure, she gets his brand

- it’s not ideal – his isn’t the image that’d be her first choice to tie with her series, it’s not really the same vibe – but she’s not going to wait for Carolyn to forget about her

- and Sebastian says he’d like to help her, but he’d have to check with his managers, and what about his tour schedule, and does she need original music, and um –

- and then Villanelle’s all “oh I couldn’t help but overhear… You know, Eve, I’m looking to get into TV”

- Eve goes, “you are?”

- well she is nOW

- nevermind she’s turned down a dozen offers over the last few years to focus on her film career

- but her film career is going great

- and none of it is as FUN as winding Eve up this last week has been, and this was only a shitty music video

- a TV shoot would be a few months, would give them both so much more time and space to see what’s the best (and worst) they can really bring out in each other 

- and Eve’s a bit lost

- because Villanelle is the It Girl du jour

- and Eve’s show hasn’t even been officially optioned but here’s all the free publicity she could want

- and she never bothered to consider it before but actually, Villanelle would be completely perfect for the lead

- perfect

- and now Eve’s thought about it it’s all coming together and she doesn’t want to let go of it again

- (and working with Villanelle some more wouldn’t suck, honestly, not completely)

- (might actually be – well)

- “are you for real?”

- “so for real,” and Villanelle’s drawling, eyebrow raised, almost smirking, but Eve can tell she’s serious

- oh this is so far above and beyond what Carolyn needed

- and that’s the start of it all