#bullying tw

[pansyboybloom]

as a teacher, reading about nex makes me fucking furious because I've seen that hate in the students I've taught. people who say young people aren't bigoted and once the old fucks die off the world will be perfect have no idea how cruel children can be when influenced by society's bigotry. while working with 8th grade, i had multiple situations of children harassing lgbt students, screaming slurs at black students, and mocking disabled, especially autistic, students. i was misgendered and degendered by these kids daily without them even knowing i was trans or gay, just that i was a feminine man. i had to dress hyper-masculine to have a smidgen of respect, and god forbid i let my disability show.

but what sticks with me the most when thinking about nex is when i had to intervene when a child proudly announced that she would murder her baby if they were trans (specifically nonbinary) because nb people were freaks, fully aware the person sitting next to her was trans. when i tried to intervene, i was disciplined because i was 'teaching my personal politics'.

this is what our schools look like. when people say they cant believe these girls could do this, i shake my head because, to me, it's no wonder nex is no longer with us. nex was a child with intersecting minority identities. our society is cruel and bigoted, and it is influencing our children. we HAVE to fix society because until we do, kids will stay cruel and kids will keep dying

[sailor-brunette]

I am sick and tired of seeing shit takes from people about how characters like Sawako (Kimi ni Todoke) and Miyo (My Happy Marriage) are "unfeminist" because they're shy and soft-spoken. When Miyo is literally that way as a SURVIVAL TACTIC because SHE WAS FUCKING ABUSED And Sawako is showed to have social anxiety and the other kids are shown to kind of bully her. But both girls gain confidence and strength as both series progress. NOT ALL WOMEN HAVE TO BE STONE COLD BADASSES TO BE STRONG!!! Geez…

[one-time-i-dreamt]

My high school bully tried to kill me but my Digimon partner (I think it was either a Rust Tyranomon or a Dorbickmon) came in and bit her vagina.

[anti-ao3]

I just hate the way people undermine the long term effects that bullying can have on someone. Abuse overall is never taken seriously, but I feel like bullying is a special case, especially if it happens in school, because everyone expects you to get over it since it's just "kids being kids" (or "boys being boys" more specifically).

Society acts like bullying won't affect adults. But adults can be bullied, whether in college, work, anywhere really. And teens who were bullied will likely struggle with a lot of traumatic responses when they grow up, such as hypervigilance, social anxiety, depression, suicidal thoughts etc.

I'm just so tired of my trauma from bullying being neglected to this day. So many therapists tell me I'm just "brooding" - or that it isn't even bullying since it never got physical or too "obvious" - and that I should move on, except I never had any support when I was in school, and I still rarely get support as an adult.

Bullying should not be normalized. It should never be okay.

[spop-romanticizes-abuse]

i'll say it. spop's whole running gag of bullies/abusers being all tsundere was not cute.

i'm talking about catra "affectionately" calling adora an idiot or saying “this is not because i like you”, as if she gave adora any reason to think that she actually likes her.

i'm talking about mermista "affectionately" calling entrapta a weirdo minutes after she treated entrapta like shit, and only accepts entrapta after she proves to be useful.

i'm talking about lonnie "affectionately" saying something along the lines of “we knew you'd go and mess it up like always” to kyle after all the times she bullied him.

it's not cute when an abuser/bully tries to act coy after mistreating someone, and insult them even more "as a form of affection".

playful insults and teasing can be endearing if it's a healthy relationship and the other person understands that it's just a joke. i'm not saying that calling someone an idiot or a weirdo is automatically an abusive thing.

but when you've always treated them like trash and your only way of showing affection is by demeaning them even more, you're just adding insult to the injury. it's not cute, it's just manipulative.

[uncanny-tranny]

I truly hope that the younger generation isn't being told that when they are being teased or bullied it's because their tormenter secretly likes them.

Somebody liking you doesn't mean they should smack you, pull your hair, tease you, berate you, call you names, make fun of your appearance, make fun of your cultural background or immigration status, or anything else. When you talk about these things, you deserve to be taken seriously. Being written off is a dangerous thing, especially if you are being bullied.

Bullying is not love or admiration.

[anti-spop]

(not spop)

i rewatched toh's "yesterday's lie" the other day, and while i enjoy this episode on its own, i think it ended up being confusing as the show went along. mostly bc yesterday's lie makes luz look bad for running away.

it turns out that summer camp wasn't all that bad since vee made some cool friends there, and camila drove to camp with luz instead of going to work, not to mention how much camila supports luz's interests. even vee herself calls luz out, even calling her ungrateful for throwing camila and everything else away.

and smth that keeps bothering me is that, as far as i'm concerned, we don't see luz actually being bullied, not even in flashbacks. what we do see most of the time is luz putting other ppl's lives in danger. she was supposed to learn to separate fantasy from reality, as said in the very first episode. which... doesn't even happen in the long term, since luz gets to have both worlds.

like, we see, for example, luz fearing she'll get ridiculed by amity, or worrying vee is going to embarrass herself. additionally, luz is protective of willow and her other friends when they're bullied themselves. like, these are valid reactions of someone who was bullied in the past. but again, when we do see luz interacting with her peers before the demon realm, she often creeps them out or straight up puts their lives in danger. i don't recall seeing anyone outright bullying luz for her interests.

yesterday's lie poses an interesting perspective, "what if luz stayed?". but it also doesn't make sense since the show is also trying to tell us that luz wasn't happy in the human realm, and wouldn't be happy in summer camp, and that she was indeed being marginalized. thanks to them showed camila's side of the whole thing, that she was pressured into sending luz to camp because of the school principal (iirc). but again, even the flashbacks show the other kids mostly being creeped out by luz, nothing more than that.

in conclusion: i do not understand what toh was trying to tell us. at first, it shows that luz didn't need to run away, that she needed to mature and separate fantasy from reality. but then the show contradicts itself entirely by not having luz go through that kind of growth, because school, society overall is in the wrong. and they don't give a lot of nuance. it's like luz doesn't have to grow up.

(and this is because i haven't even touched on the fact that luz is so attached to good witch azura because of her dad. this is never brought up again.)

[handjawab]

bullying tw

Note: This is heavily inspired by that scene with Flash Thompson and Peter Parker in the Amazing Spider Man movie.

bully!Bakugou who is self-aware...

He says the worst possible things to you regularly and is an expert at making you feel like shit. He prides himself in knowing what buttons to push and exactly when to push them to make you feel like you don't deserve to take up space. As a result, he's attentive so when you're hurting and it's not because of him, he's the first to notice. And he's... weird about it.

You've been moping around all day and Bakugou's just decided he's going to get to the bottom of it, "Oi. What the hell's wrong with you?"

You ignore him.

"Don't fucking ignore me. You know that just makes it worse."

"I'm just not in the mood today, Katsuki. Please."

"When are you ever in the mood, huh?"

'okay that's it," you get up and leave the room. He follows you. Because of course he does.

When you get to your class, he sits down right next to you and watches intently as you get your books out of your bag.

As the minutes pass, his presence starts to weigh on you. It was already difficult to breathe today, but he makes it worse. But you knew that; He never makes anything easier.

Before you fully realise what you're doing, you turn around, slap him across the face, and ask, "What the hell do you want from me?"

For a fraction of a second, a flash of murderous intent crosses his features but then his mouth opens slightly in what you assume is surprise and he puts a palm to his cheek, where you slapped him.

A couple seconds later, he relaxes his face, the corners of his mouth raising up slightly, "There we go... There she is," he coos, never taking his eyes off you.

You're stressed out and overwhelmed and you're tired of his shit (what's new). And the tears start streaming down your face. Because of course they do.

You're so fucking predictable and now you've slapped him.

Sure, he deserved it. But not today. You can't deal with another thing today.

You wipe at the tears violently, like you're trying to push them back into your eyes, anticipating what usually comes next: some wise-crack about you crying.

But he doesn't say anything. He just pulls your hands away from your face gently, like he's afraid he might break you.

He holds them away from your face and watches you struggle against yourself to collect your bearings. The tears don't fucking stop.

The scrutiny burns. He just stares at you. Expressionless. You should feel vulnerable but it feels like he's the vulnerable one in this situation — letting you see a version of him that's neither angry nor pissing you off.

He drops your hands and wipes the tears off your face with the sleeves of his t-shirt (futile action because they keep coming afterwards) and says, "do you want to skip class?"

You take a deep, ragged breath to avoid sounding shaky when you say, "yeah, that'd be nice"

He holds your hand like he's afraid to lose you in the crowd when he walks you through the corridors to an empty classroom.

"Sit down"

You don't react so he sighs and sits you down on a chair himself.

"and- stop crying for fuck's sake," he almost looks sheepish.

For some reason, you cry harder. You can't help it. You're hurting. He's being... strange and it's perplexing.

He rakes a frustrated hand through his hair leans back in his chair, and says, "okay. You have the floor. Cry. However long you need to."

[narcissisticpdcultureis]

NPD culture is

@

YOU ARE AN AUTISTIC KID ENTERING SCHOOL

@

DUE TO YOUR DISTINCTIVE AUTISTIC RIZZ KIDS DON'T REALLY LIKE YOU

@

KIDS EVENTUALLY START BULLYING YOU BECAUSE YOU DON'T STOP TRYING TO INTERACT WITH THEM

@

ADULTS IN YOUR LIFE TELL YOU THAT IF YOU STOP PAYING ATTENTION THEY'LL STOP BUT THIS IS BULLSHIT

@

AS A BONUS YOUR PARENTS GIVE YOU MIXED MESSAGES ON THEIR ATTITUDE DEPENDING ON IF THIS DAY YOU'RE A "genius child who knows numbers and can remember 30 facts about sharks every day" AUTISTIC OR A "unfunctional puppet who is out of energy and can't even write 5 words on her homework and only wants some peace and a nap and doesn't want to do any intellectual bullshit" AUTISTIC TODAY

@

HOWEVER ONE DAY YOU DISCOVER THAT IF YOU HAVE SOME SORT OF POWER ARTIFACT ON YOU, PEOPLE CAN TREAT YOU LIKE A LIVING BEING AND NOT LIKE A ROTTING PILE OF TRASH

@

PARENTS ARE MORE NICE WHEN YOU BRING HOME GOOD GRADES

@

CLASSMATES WANT TO COMMUNICATE WITH YOU WHEN YOU GET A PHONE WITH GAMES AND LET THEM PLAY

@

TEACHERS DON'T NEGLECT YOU WHEN YOU BEHAVE AND SUCK UP TO THEM

@

NPD WIN! NOW YOU KNOW THAT TO BE LIKED BY OTHERS YOU HAVE TO BE SOMETHING YOU'RE NOT AND YOU'LL BE LOVED AND CHERISHED PROPERLY!

@

... ONLY FOR A SHORT WHILE THOUGH! REMEMBER, YOU CAN'T WEAR THE MASK FOR LONG! IT STARTS TO SLIP BECAUSE YOU ARE AN IDIOT WHO CAN'T DO THINGS RIGHT! AND WHEN YOU LET THE MASK SLIP AFTER TWO THREE DAYS OF PROPER BEHAVIOUR, THE HATRED IS BACK! THE DISGUST IS BACK! THE ANNOYANCE IS ALL THE WAY IN!

@

It got less intense with time, though. As you grew out of elementary and out of middle school, people became more decent. Sure they don't like you, but they care abouy their reputation now. They know that if you see a weirdo you just have to wait until they're gone, that saying someone that you want them dead is rude, and that bullying is a waste of their precious time.

@

BUT YOU KNOW! YOU REMEMBER!

@

AND WHEN YOU FAIL A TEST, YOU REMEMBER HOW MOTHER USED TO YELL AT YOU AND TEAR OUT PAGES FROM YOUR NOTEBOOK SO YOU OVERWRITE YOUR HOMEWORK BECAUSE IT LOOKS INCOMPREHENSIBLE!

@

AND WHEN YOUR DESK MATE IS NOT SITTING WITH YOU BECAUSE SHE'S. WELL. SICK AND CURRENTLY AT HOME, YOU REMEMBER HOW NOBODY WOULD SIT WITH YOU BECAUSE YOU WOULD DISGUST THEM TOO MUCH FOR THEM TO EVEN TOUCH YOU, LET ALONE SIT WITH YOU OR TALK TO YOU!

@

AND WHENEVER YOU SEE A TEACHER THAT ACTS LIKE A TEACHER YOU REMEMBER THAT IF YOU DON'T TRY ENOUGH YOU'LL BE HATED AND NEGLECTED AND HAVE YOUR COMPLAINTS DISREGARDED BUT IF YOU TRY TOO HARD YOU'LL BE HATED TOO BECAUSE NOBODY ASKED AND LET OTHER PEOPLE ANSWER AND SHUT UP PLEASE

@

You will always know that people hate you. They showed you that when you were supposed to learn how to interact, so now that's what you learned. You know that you have to do your best to be treated like a person. You know that everyone still treats you like trash and hates the very existence of you but by occasionally throwing in something redeeming you can try to survive a day. You know that your parents are your friends, as long as you perform well and are a good daughter they can show off like a medal. You know that your peers are your friends, as long as you're funny but not like you really are good but not best not best but not horrible communicable but not clingy but like things they like but don't like them too much but express some emotions but not too much wtf but talk to them but not speak too much and speak enough and do enough but not too much but you know what forget it, just be a comic relief to keep them entertained (but not genuine or they'll hate it). You know that teachers are your friends but... Oh, they're not, sorry. They're like parents, but don't care about your success, they're more unstable than children and more crushing than parents and you have no idea how to suck up to them in a way that makes them treat you well

@

You figured the world out! Except you fucking didn't.

.

[compassionatereminders]

I am so deeply stressed out. Me and my partner had to leave a really toxic job (the last day I worked they had me in tears over a very very simple miscommunication error that I was actively correcting when my manager interrupted me to talk about how horrible I am) but we didn't have anything else lined up, so we're both out jobs, and our roommate can't work because of disabilities, but he's also not on disability yet, so we have literally no income right now

and we're applying, but every job we apply to is like. haha, wait two weeks before you get to see if you get one interview, and then if you do, wait another couple to see if you get the second round of it or the job !!! suffer and die forever !!

And even then, i've gotten like. two interviews. and our dog might need another vet visit (his tails all weird, long story but he's in a cone and we're doing what we can for it at home (vet assisted) so he's not. DYING but it's still concerning because we don't know whats gonna happen with his tail or not) which we just DONT have the money for, and my phone bill is up soon, and i need my phone going because, interviews. but i have like. a third of what i need for it. and also rent is something (thankfully it's not much, we live with the roommates parents so its like 400 a month but still)

and we're running low on food. because of course we are.

my partner has a job that seems v promising (he's done the interview and the people really liked him it seemed) but he still needs to wait a few weeks, and i'm applying to at least a couple places a day, but my options are so limited cause I just can't interact with people daily in a customer service way (like being a waiter and the like) and no one is getting back to me.

also thankfully my roommate has an appointment with his therapist (free therapy for being considered SMI, so we got that) in the next couple days to properly talk about food stamps/disability, i'm just. we couldn't stick around in that environment, it was actively making me so bad I was worried I'd need to go inpatient. But i so wish we had stuck around until we found a new job, no matter how bad my mental health was falling because it just feels like nothings getting better.

This situation sounds really horrible, scary and incredibly stressful and my heart goes out to you and your loved ones! But I really don't blame you for having to leave a job that was mistreating you and destroying your mental health. I just hope you manage to find a new source of income very soon and that you'll all be okay ❤️

[azuremist]

ever since i was born naked, destiny written on my palm, there's not a single day in the prophecy calendar of life when i'm not alone.

"jordan river" by vivinos.

[homunculusalphonse]

EDIT: i was informed raven molisee uses he/him pronouns! i'm sorry about that, please reblog this version instead.

so thanks to raven molisee (a previous storyboarder for steven universe) showing his concept art for horror club, we (aka me) can confirm that:

lars was thought to have borderline personality disorder (at least that's something raven particularly liked)

lars was bullied as a kid and he internalized it to the point where he can't take compliments srsly

and he's queer! (not a surprise to me though) and he dealt with internalized homophobia due to his bullies

apparently little ronaldo might have crushed on lars too

gosh that's so much lore and while i'm sad we didn't see more of it in the show, i just love how deep of a character lars is, as well as his friendship with ronaldo. i am being fed lmao.

[anti-ao3]

I remember hearing someone say that bullying and racism - and hate crimes in general - are not the same, and I could not disagree more.

While I don't recall explicit racism at my school, I distinctly remember the fact that the majority of bullying victims were POC. This also has to do with the school being a private, conservative christian environment, and there were very little black students and black teachers. This also applies to disabled/neurodivergent kids, and I suppose LGBTQ+ kids though I don't remember anyone openly coming out at the time (not that it would be a safe space to do so, honestly).

And bullying can be fatal, actually - and I don't mean only suicide (which is still unfortunately common, and should be taken seriously). Misogyny kills. Racism kills. LGBTphobia kills - which is what happened to Nex Benedict, for instance.

I'm really sick of people assuming that bullying is just a dumb little thing that happens at school. No, it isn't. It ruins lives. It already ruined my life even if my experience wasn't as severe as other cases. But kids of all marginalized groups die because of bullying.

[spop-romanticizes-abuse]

“spop is such a diverse show, it has good representation!”

the diversity and good representation in question:

an abusive lesbian couple

a bisexual couple who were paired off at the last possible moment with no prior romantic chemistry

the only non-binary character is an inhuman shapeshifter who looks like a reptile

the only autistic character is literally leashed by the "good guys" and repeatedly berated for not being normal enough

the only physically disabled character is a villain whose disability is taken advantage of by the abusive catgirl

the half-cat half-human hybrid who displays a lot of animalistic traits including being aggressive and violent is said to be latina

the neurodivergent queer kid is the show's punching bag and is constantly harrassed for the sake of comedy

saying that some of the characters are bisexual feels like an afterthought, as they don't actually show any signs of being bisexual

only polyamorous couple in the show is the bullied queer kid, his bully and the bully's enabler (of sorts)

the only character with a facial disfigurement is another antagonist who is painted as pure evil despite being a lot more nuanced than some of the other characters

[dark-type-appreciator]

No kitty face, sus

I'm not gonna act like a fucking furry

[anti-spop]

spop stans: obviously we care about abuse victims!!!!

also spop stans: *shit on adora every time she stands up to catra, shit on glimmer for being manipulated by shadow weaver during a mourning period, don't take the bullying against kyle seriously, don't see anything wrong with how the princesses treat entrapta, devalue adora's experience as an abuse survivor, sexualize catra abusing adora etc. etc.*