#bulldozing over everything and everyone in the path
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robertdownerjunior · 2 years ago
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who's the character you say you hate because you don't like their personality/actions but actually hate bc they remind me too much about you or your life?
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corvuserpens · 3 months ago
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Theory for what happened between the conclusion of Black Sails and the beginning of Treasure Island: part 1
I don't have it in me to write an actual fic bc I'm already stretched thin as it is with my Master's dissertation + paleoart project, my part-time restaurant job AND writing a self-indulgent fic that I may or may not post, but! I have Ideas and I need to share them.
Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3
OKAY, SO! 🙏
After the end of Black Sails, Flint is alive and he's in the plantation with Thomas, where he spends the rest of his days. Far into the future Thomas passes away from natural causes, and Flint, in his grief over losing him a second time, and with no cause fueled by Vengeance to keep him going, starts to wither away himself. Whether his health failing due to alcoholism is... Subjective.
What is for certain however, is that without Thomas, Flint suddenly spends A LOT of time alone with his thoughts. And boy, do his thoughts start spinning and unraveling.
He recalls the past: Nassau, his adventures, his misadventures, the bold impossible plans for a revolution that was supposed to make an empire shake and crumble into dust, the friendships, the alliances, but also the betrayals. Oh, the betrayals... They eat away at him until he's consumed with dark thoughts of a rage that lied dormant for twenty or thirty years, but in the wake of Thomas' death comes back in full force like a tsunami. Impossible to ignore, destroying everything in its path. And the one betrayal at the forefront of the line, is Long John Silver.
Unfortunately, with the way his body is starting to give out after decades at sea, from battle to battle in countless blood shedding, and then years of labor in the fields, he knows he doesn't stand a chance to do anything grand and explosive about it.
So, Flint does what Flint is best at: he concocts a plot. His ultimate plot. He writes letters and sends them out through half the globe, from the Bahamas to England, summoning all acquaintances who are still alive to come see him before his final hour. There aren't many of them left, granted, which might be fortunate because with each passing day, Flint grows weaker and weaker. He can see Thomas waiting from across the river of the dead. Miranda, too. They're waiting for him. It won't be too long now.
Now, to answer the question: what happened to Billy Bones after he was stranded on Skeleton Island? The simple answer is, Ben Gunn.
Ben found himself a new crew as soon as possible and, after months (he doesn't have the gift of manipulation like Flint or Silver do, it takes him some convincing), he manages to entice them into looking for Flint's treasure, but in reality, he's there to rescue Billy.
Oh, this new crew still searches part of the island for the treasure, but after a few days, a lot of them are dead of pestilence from the swamps or really rotten luck. They decide it's not worth it and gtfo there, with an embittered, extremely pissed Billy in tow who wastes no time taking over the ship by force.
Literally by force, he beat up everyone who stood a chance to take him on and, despite the months going hungry and struggling to survive, he is an unstoppable bulldozer. Ben Gunn can no longer recognize the man he had once admired so. He has turned cruel and uncaring, especially after the first three tankards of rum. Understandably, Ben Gunn is a Little Bit Afraid of Billy Bones now.
Meanwhile, Silver and Madi found some reconciliation. They are in love, they are safe, they get married, adopt a parrot, and, for the most part, they're happy.
But it's a fragile happiness. Always, there's the reminder of everything Silver did, from quashing the war to removing Flint permanently. All Madi has to do is look at her lover and it all comes back. Every time she does, she has to make a conscious effort to bury it in her soul. But it's there all the same. The resentment. The disappointment. The hurt. Slowly corroding their bond. And Silver sees it. Flint's last words to him gnaw at him. She will no longer be enough. The comfort will grow stale. He's to smart not to know this, indeed. And yet, there's nothing he can do to remedy it.
Until he receives the letter. Flint is dying. Thomas is gone and soon he will follow. This is his last chance for reconciliation and to offer a little forgiveness. Maybe receive some in return, as well. Together, Silver and Madi travel to Savannah, Georgia.
Billy has also received Flint's letter, and at first he doesn't want to go. Let Flint rot, and may his soul burn in Hell where it belongs (where he belongs, as well). Why should he give a damn about the man who ruined his life?
But another part of him wants to go. He wants to see Flint dying with his own two eyes, just to make sure he's actually gone. It won't be the same as getting his own hands wrapped around his throat and squeezing until that glint in his eye finally snuffs out, but it's the next best thing. And who knows? Maybe God will be merciful and offer him the chance to do it, anyway. Billy also travels to Savannah, with a growing reluctant Ben Gunn at his side.
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rene-hl-trashcan · 7 months ago
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Sylvan & Sylvia Character Sheet!
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I found this character sheet template on Pinterest and thought it would be fun to do one for all of my MCs. I already have an elaborated story of them in my head so this might motivates me to actually write it lol. Sylvan and Sylvia are a set so they get to go first!
◟( ˃̶͈◡ ˂̶͈ )◞
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If I could sum up these "twins" in short warning tag, it would be :
Sylvan : Unhinged obsessive floof. Do not be deceived. Proceed at your own risk.
Sylvia : The ice and thorns are protection. Please proceed with gentleness.
(You can read the reasons below lol) 🤣🤣🤣🤣
Sylvan and Sylvia aren't actually twins or blood-related siblings but they're doppelgangers to each other from alternate universes. Sylvia's parents didn't marry out of love like Sylvan's so they didn't go through all the courting phases. They got together early and that's why in her world, she was born nearly a year earlier than him.
Sylvia was originally so closed-off and near-emotionless when she first joined the household. She also struggled to express her emotions or needs despite how welcoming her new family was. Those self-preservation defensive walls of hers were the primary catalyst and the beginning of Sylvan's absolutely unhinged obsession over the people he has came to claim as his. He did everything he could to ensure that she felt safe, warm and welcomed into his family; willingly giving up everything he has, unyielding and persistent despite her rejections, skirting around her boundaries and walls as he tried to find a crack where he could wedge his way into her heart. It were long arduous years for him to gain the trust of his new sister but when she finally opened up, he already developed the toxic yandere habit of obsessing over the people he likes.
Hence, that is also the reason Anne has no chance of dying, Sebastian would never walk the path of a murderer, and Ominis would be free from the Gaunts in the AU where Sylvan is the protagonist. He loves his Slytherin Trio so much to allow anything bad ever touching them lol.
That unhinged boy would fight god with a toothpick if it meant he got to secure your happiness for you. Best/worst part, you don't even have to like him or reciprocate his love. He understands that he can't force people to like him so he wouldn't expect you to do so. Which sounds good and all until you realised that he would also use the same excuse to justify the fact that he couldn't force himself to not like you and that he is unwilling to stop himself from bulldozing his way into your life.
Also, Sylvan loves cuddles and hugs. Boy has the horrible habit of pulling everyone he likes into a cuddle whenever he felt like it. When it comes to cuddles, he will hug first ask consent later. 🤣🤣🤣
TLDR; if Sylvan likes you, you're already his and he would do anything he is capable of to ensure that you feel safe, loved and happy.
Meanwhile, Sylvia is a squishy softy hiding under the icy RBF mask.
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idristardis · 2 years ago
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SUPER Late Thoughts on S9 of NCIS: LA
Ok. So.
Just finished S9 and have started on S10 (I'm caught up through the cold open of S10 E6 - Asesinos), and I have....thoughts. Thoughts that were likely already thought and said and dissected on here literal years ago, but still. I has them.
Under the cut because they'll be a ramble and this way you can save yourselves if you want to!
This really focuses on S9 E16 - Warrior of Peace through S10 E1 - To Live and Die in Mexico with a few notes from S10 E 4 - Hit List and S10 E6 - Asesinos).
Moseley
Okay. I know that she was brought in as an antagonist figure - someone who was there until Hetty could be retrieved from Vietnam but who could never be Hetty. But man....they made her really hard to empathize with. Like, at all. And for a character who was a mother who would do anything for her son, it's kind of stunning that the writers made her so unlikeable. Like, there is not much there to latch on to.
Perhaps it's the fact that I binged most of the back half of the season in quick succession rather than waiting for it week to week, but seeing her trajectory of vengeance play out made it clear that she wanted what she wanted and she was going to get it - and she either didn't think about or didn't care about the consequences until it was too late. Perhaps she was arrogant and thought she could beat the odds and nothing bad would happen to her or her team, but...boy did she misjudge.
In S10 E1 when Killbride tells her "you got everything you wanted" and her retort is that that makes it sound "like a wish list off Amazon," I found it hard to disagree with him. The fact that Moseley couldn't answer him when he asked her if it was worth the price was incredibly telling - she couldn't say no, because that would devalue Hidoko's sacrifice, and she couldn't say yes because then that would make her seem monstrous.
But she did bulldoze over everyone and everything that stood in her way to get what she wanted. And she got it...but at the cost of Hidoko's life and nearly Deeks' and Callen's. Sam wasn't in that great shape either by the time all was said and done. She wanted to rescue her son from his father because she saw Spencer Williams as a monster (and he was no angel) but she sacrificed a lot of her moral high ground by the time she got Derek back.
Hetty, for all her machinations and behind the scenes dealings does understand the value of cultivating contacts and trust and working with a team when it's beneficial. Then, when you need them, the team will work with you and trust and follow you. Moseley showed why the lone wolf/smartest in the room/dictatorial leadership mindset has huge flaws.
I wrote everything above before I watched S10 E4 and S10 E6 (granted, only up to the cold open of the latter) and now that I have seen those as well...my impression still hasn't changed. Moseley's first instinct is to not trust Callen and the team, not rely on NCIS as an agency at all, but just go pick up Derek herself after hearing about the cartel hit list. This is AFTER everything the team did to get him back in Mexico...sheesh!
Rather than coming off as protective Mamabear, it still has a ring of high-handed, imperious, "only I know best" attitude - and other characters notice it, as evidenced when Ochoa tells her that she "started a personal war" to get Derek back in Mexico and she can't do that all over again. Yet...the opener of S10 E6 has her going lone wolf and killing a cartel hit man, then going off the grid. I'm not sure, maybe Hetty's mysterious disappearance is tied up in what's going on with Moseley, but to this point, it seems like Moseley is just continuing on a path of doing whatever she wants/thinks is best and damn the consequences. Perhaps at this point, it's fueled by fear over what being on the hit list means for Derek, but still...it seems very "it's my way or no way," and it makes it hard to sympathize with her.
I think the writers wasted an opportunity here with the character to give her more to work with and be more fully rounded. It's a shame.
Hidoko
One of the things I had been spoiled on prior to viewing this season was the fact that Hidoko died, and died in rather horrible and unfair circumstances. But nothing really prepared me for how it actually happened. The character and actress deserved far FAR better than that send off.
Sam and Callen
Callen first, actually. Starting with S9 E16 - Warrior of Peace and moving through the back end of the season, Callen experienced a profound shift in personal circumstances (letting his father go through with the exchange for the American photographers in S9 E16), but he never let it shake his cool as team leader.
Chris O'Donnell did a lovely job of expressing Callen's anger and grief in the silent final beats of S9 E16 as he watched his father go. The camera lingers on his face and he used every minute change of expression to mean so much. It was very well done...and though he never explicitly says it, I think that going through that experience is part of why he agrees to help Moseley (other than his sense of duty as team leader - i.e. if anyone from his team is getting involved, it's him). Having experienced the unjust loss of a family member to circumstances beyond his control, he doesn't want anyone else to have to go through that.
Sam does explicitly express that sentiment, when he notes that the loss of Michelle is what's driving him to go to Mexico despite his injury - he doesn't want to see another parent (i.e. Moseley) endure grief and pain when they don't have to.
The bantering between them...bickering, really...over whether or not Sam is able to go and able to keep up, is spot on classic Sallen. I particularly enjoyed the moment when they were already in Mexico and Callen snarked something about Sam's cane and Sam just threw it into the underbrush. Oh boys....
But for all of that, the moment when they thought they might die, and Callen tells Sam he can't talk anymore because of his collapsed lung was really powerful and moving. We knew as viewers they'd be okay since the show clearly had been picked up again by the time S10 E1 aired, but the scene was still done really well.
It's interesting that after they returned from Mexico, Sam appeared to be neutral/positive towards Moseley - reassuring her in S10 E4 that she'd find a way to be a good mother again, and offering to keep Derek on his boat for awhile for protection - but privately in conversations with Callen, Sam said that Moseley hadn't cared what happened to them in Mexico and implied distrust/dissatisfaction with her actions. In response, it was Callen who pointed out that she also hadn't asked any of them to actively go there either. Clearly, her actions are still affecting other team members' relationships even after the mission.
Densi
Oh gosh, where do I start?
This was a painful half season for them, but the writers telegraphed it so well and ECO and Dani played it so beautifully. It was clear that they needed to go through a crisis and have some Big Relationship Talks before they could fully get on the same page and really be ready to be married.
I feel like S8 ended with the engagement and they were just riding the buzz of that for the first half of S9, then there was Hetty and Vietnam and by the time the second half of S9 rolled around, Deeks had started having doubts about NCIS as a career path. This started off in S9 E16 when the plan to just offer up Kirkin instead of Callen's father was proposed.
Sam and Kensi were in without a moment's hesitation, but Deeks raised the ethical question of whether consigning Kirkin to the torturous existence that was surely waiting back in Russia, when he wasn't the one that had been requested in the trade, was really what NCIS was supposed to do. He knows Kirkin is no angel and doesn't care for him personally (though Kirkin clearly likes Deeks a lot), but it's still worth asking. But because it's Callen's Dad's freedom at stake and everyone else is in so easily, his objections are minimal and he tucks them away quickly.
But this is where the cracks really start to form...the back half of the season is peppered with commentary in the Densi scenes showing that they are on very different pages about what they want for their wedding. Most of these things are played for humor (they have different ideas about the ceremony and reception, the location, who to invite, haha haha) and are quickly resolved, usually with Deeks just saying he only wants what Kensi wants (which actually just means he's not really participating in the decision-making process). But there are other, bigger, things too.
S9 E17 - The Monster gives us that horrible case with the stitched together people, and at the heart of it, a victim who'd fallen in love with his partner while they were on the job, something that definitely resonates with Deeks...and soon after that, we first start hearing about him wanting to buy a bar. He's so serious about it over the next few episodes that he actually broaches it with Callen before talking to Kensi. Kensi, to her credit, does jump on board with the idea after her initial shock and surprise, and does so pretty quickly. I think she sees that having some sort of post-NCIS plan is important to him, but I think she misjudges/doesn't realize how soon he wants to make post-NCIS life a reality.
By the time S9 E23 - A Line in the Sand rolls around, these things have been weighing on Deeks for awhile, I think, but they keep getting shoved aside in favor of cases and more pressing concerns. I have to think, though, that seeing Sam get shot didn't help his line of thinking at all. And so we get to the point where he can't just follow along with the rest of the team when they insist on going to Mexico. He raises logical points about this being Moseley's custody battle that they should have no real part in. It may be a little cold, but it's not untrue - and unlike Hetty, unlike Callen, Moseley's done nothing to win their trust or allegiance (see her section above).
So. The Conversation. After Moseley's fired him and had him escorted from the building - she really had to rub that in, didn't she? That awful conversation in the parking garage. They're clearly talking past each other - Deeks wasn't trying to tell Kensi "don't be who you are" or "don't believe in what you believe in," and he knows how much the job is a part of her identity. But I think that's what she was hearing - an ultimatum. "We can't be married if you don't give up your job." But I think that what Deeks was really saying was that he wasn't sure that HE could do this anymore, actually, he's pretty sure he can't, and he's trying to remind her that while the job is part of each of them, and part of who they are together, it's not ALL of who they are as a couple.
Hard as it was for Kensi (and the audience) to hear, I think that the "I think we shouldn't be getting married" needed to be said...because they weren't facing up to the different things they wanted before that point. She had to then make him confront the fact she may never want to leave this job, she may never want to have kids (or she might want to and they might be unable), and he was trying to say not "quit this job or I won't marry you" but "we shouldn't be getting married when we're this far apart on some pretty big issues, so let's get that sorted out." Then, of course, there were goons (ahem, Moseley's escort officers) waiting and no time to finish the conversation so they left things in a horrible muddle...
...but of course Deeks showed up for the flight to Mexico anyway because he's "still your partner" and the team is, as Sam ironically put it, "one big happy family."
There was some resolution to the Densi issues in S10 E1, though not quite as explicitly stated as I would have wished. Deeks is unconscious for much of the episode...which gives Kensi a chance to contemplate the fear of losing him for quite a good chunk of time as she's hauling him through the desert. I think that prior to this, even up through their argument in S9 E23, there's a part of her that can't imagine living life any other way - she wants to do this job, and she wants to do it with him. Things have been (mostly) fine despite some of their near misses and scrapes before...they'll always find a way to get out of it, so why shouldn't she keep doing what she loves? But she has a looong time in this episode to think about what it would mean to keep doing that job without Deeks and what losing him would really be like. It's a long, slow, slog through the desert where she contemplates what she really values in life.
She doesn't get much dialogue to support her emotional journey here, but Dani's face said quite a lot in many of those scenes, and there was a piece of dialogue that I think spoke to her state of mind - where she tells him she'd carry him forever if he'd just wake up. This, and their episode closing exchange of vows to each give the other everything in this life, support a shift towards greater unity of purpose and being on the same page/ready to finally be married. They've figured out that each other comes first and they're not willing to put anything - jobs, kids, etc. - ahead of the other. It's just that the show allowed Deeks the dialogue to show this evolution - at the end, he says "I was wrong, I want to marry you." Kensi is not given any dialogue to show that she feels differently except vowing to give him everything. As is usually the case with this show, I want more Densi dialogue!!
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Okay...that was really tl; dr...but it feels good to be back!!
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Chapter 4: Dreamless Pollia
Narrated by Qin Yi.
Host: The scent of pollia in the air and the moonlight makes me sentimental.
Narrator: The scent of pollia is in the air.
Narrator: I couldn’t smell the pollia blossoms on that new shirt back in my childhood.
Narrator: But their warmth stays with me to this day... the precious gift of warmth in winter.
Host: The New Year is almost here! Happy New Year to everyone here in the studio. I hope you get to spend it with your loved ones.
Host: Our show’s almost over! Happy Early New Year, everyone!
Narrator: Applause and cheers fill the auditorium. The event is reaching its climax.
Narrator: Everyone is laughing, hugging, and wishing each other “Happy New Year.”
Guest: Happy New Year, Qin Yi!
Qin Yi: Happy New Year.
Actor: Give me a hug, Qin Yi! Happy New Year!
Qin Yi: Happy New Year.
Narrator: The celebrations and congratulations continue long into the night.
Narrator: Finally, the crowd disperses, the fireworks stop, and everything goes quiet.
Narrator: A staff member asks me if I want a ride home, but I refuse.
Narrator: It’s a nice night, and I decide to walk back myself.
Narrator: This is the first time I’ve had to myself for days.
Narrator: Streetlights cast shadows over the trees in the lonely street.
Narrator: Small brown fruit hands down from the branches. It’s the fruit I ate as a child.
Narrator: They make me think of a freezing park in winter and a bright-eyed fawn.
Qin Yi: I should take a look.
Narrator: It is called Deer Park now. The old neighborhood was gone, replaced by shiny high-rise condos.
Narrator: Much of Sunnyville had been bulldozed, and the alleyways are no longer so dingy.
Narrator: The layout is the same, but the buildings have the look of Cloudcrest, and the wind feels the same.
Choose “Don’t get lost.”
You: Could you get lost?
Narrator: Unlikely. I’ve past through here too many times.
Narrator: Deer Park has been expanded. The gardens are well-kept, and the paths are clean.
Narrator: I can’t even see the pavilion where I took shelter with the deer.
Narrator: The deer was the only warmth I could find during that long winter.
Narrator: Apparently, the park still has lots of deer. Tourists can buy crackers to feed them.
Narrator: Back then, I cuddled up to the deer and told him my troubles. We shared food, too.
Narrator: I still remember how those crackers tasted... and the fruit.
Narrator: The groundskeepers would collect the fruit growing inside the park and feed it to the deer.
Narrator: The nut is sweet, but very hard to peel.
Qin Yi: Hm...
Narrator: Not again. I’ve cut myself on the hard shell.
Narrator: The nuts still taste sweet, but the blood from my finger and the bitterness of the unpeeled skin give it an odd flavor.
Narrator: The sweetness is strange, but it’s just as how I remember it.
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
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itsinmyear · 2 days ago
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Tread (2020)
"Pushed to his breaking point, a master welder in a small town at the foot of the Rocky Mountains quietly fortifies a bulldozer with 30 tons of concrete and steel and seeks to destroy those he believes have wronged him."
Heartbreaking.
I came away feeling like he'd hit an anger/conspiracy wall most of us would stop at, but he found the door through. and took it as a sign.
Seriously, who hasn't had at least a moment of feeling like everything is against them, everyone is against them. We rage, maybe bitch to people we trust or online or whatever. And we get past it, figure it out.
We get actual audio from the man himself - he made a cassette recording going over all of the events - his version of the events - that led up to this point. He may have been delusional, but I have no doubt he believed in his story.
There are interviews with people involved - friends, people he considered enemies, bystanders who ended up in the path, the cops that tried (and failed) to stop him when it was absolutely not going to happen.
Personally, I think he was only *mostly* delusional. I think the guys he considered enemies? Were absolutely shifty rich boys. I got real Ben/John Boy Cartwright vibes from them, and that's not a compliment. The conversations with his friends kind of back that up.
Anyway, there were no winners here. Although I bet in the end, the Cartwright's made out like bandits.
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snugglebuddyhan · 1 year ago
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No, I'm serious, making npc's able to switch lanes while driving and gangs able to chase each other around the city were the WORST updates added to Cyberpunk 2077
Driving in first person is my favorite thing to do in the game. It's all a part of my role playing, but it's also relaxing. The lane switching would be fine if it didn't cause total chaos when they do it. I can't even drive in peace anymore, bc they never seem to switch when they have an actual opening. All it takes is them slightly tapping another car with theirs and the entire block starts freaking out. People start screaming, running and cars start hitting everyone and everything in their paths including ME. My little car gets tossed around like a football
While I was looking for Del's cabs I watched a single car freak out after being hit by someone trying to get in their lane and when I made the block again they somehow managed to blow up every car it rammed into. It looked like someone nuked the fucking street. Just fire and burnt cars everywhere
And don't get me started on the random u-turns they take, bc WHY would they do that when there's literally no room for them to turn around? Just knocking cars off the street for no reason and if they end up turning onto the sidewalk they just mow civilians down like a damn bulldozer
There's also me trying to avoid the chaos and getting the cops on my case, bc civilians keep running in front of my car making me run them over like??? Now I've got to deal with trying to get rid of my wanted level when I'm just trying to go clothes shopping
The gang chases get on my nerves just as much. I'll just be cruising to my destination and next thing you know I'm being tossed off the side of a bridge by one of their vehicles hitting me at 150 mph when I have nothing to do with their beef. I'm literally just minding my business. ALL that road and I'm ALWAYS hit. For what? I've gotten out of my car and just stood there watching them and NO one cared I had a front row seat to their shootout. Leave me out of it if I'm not supposed to be involved
Earlier, I was at a red light coming from Dogtown and was ran off a bridge by one of their cars. I fell and flipped for an eternity and I would have survived, but my car hit a chooh2 tank when when I landed. It blew me up and killed me, bc of fucking course it would
I. AM. TIRED. I know these elements were added for immersion purposes, but I could have lived without them. They sounded better in theory
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10thmusemoon · 7 months ago
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Ok disclaimers being that i'm someone w/ adhd and i acknowledge that adhd presents itself differently in everyone.
The impulsiveness that was Yue Qi's defining character trait was what first led me down this path. So then I've thought a lot about how this would present itself when he was at CQMS and suddenly had a more rigid structure in his life, a lot of it depending on sitting still and listening.
When I write YQY there's always some level of movement going on, whether it's shifting in his seat or subtly flexing his fingers, and focusing is something that takes a conscious effort because of audio processing issues. In my mind, it was sheer determination that got him through the writing/language/etc aspects of learning that he was suddenly thrust into and even then I picture it as having been quite a struggle that he turned inward. Luckily, the physical aspects of cultivation were a good outlet for him and slowly, the structure of the day to day sect life became helpful as well. (I do think that a fucked up day does result in some chaos for him that he has to bulldoze back into order) But he was still impulsive, and pushing his way through what he struggled with got him this far, so of course that's what he'd keep doing. Imagine someone who got by procrastinating in high school and is suddenly met with the consequences of that habit in college.
Being impulsive was fine, it was working, until it wasn’t.
After thinking that SJ is dead, he drastically over corrects. He fucked up in the worst way. There was no coming back from this, everything that he thought was fine before was apparently not.
Now he hesitates too much when he needs to act, thinks about how it affects everyone instead of blindly going forward without worrying too much of the consequences. A lot of this makes him a good sect leader, but it's stifling in it's own way. Like masking 24/7 out of guilt and fear of a repeated, drastic, failure. In the way that people with untreated adhd tend to have depression and anxiety as a result of coping (or not coping) with adhd I think both of these would develop in YQY, further exasperated by the the toll his mental health took by being in solitary confinement for over a year.
(That’s another conversation.)
When he reunites with SJ he's so fucking relieved, so happy, but also deeply ashamed of everything with LX caves and anxious and depressed and maybe feeling an aspect of rejection sensitive dyphoria if the truth comes out about his failure. He’s preemptively accepting that SJ thinks he’s the worst w/o ever telling him the truth that would, sadly, raise SJ’s esteem of him. I do think his RSD would fully fixate on SJ and not on any one else because for the longest time SJ is the only one who mattered. And even then Xiao Jiu is by nature so prickly that there is some leeway because there Always has been for his qi-ge. Even during the QiJiu extras ling xi caves scene there is a sense of care/worry that SJ shows for yqy, so even if their relationship has degraded I do think YQY can sense there is still some regard there, however small.
Also where I hc SJ as having an amazing innate sense of time which also made those years apart drag on, I do think YQY suffers from time blindness and so for him, of course he’s ready to jump back into this relationship where they left off.
It’s a Yin Yu Quan Yizhen situation in a way. Where SJ and YY rely on the world’s judgement to perceive themselves, YQY and QYZ only care about their perception through the reflection YY&SJ provide.
SV characters that I head canon as having ADHD
Yue Qingyuan
Qi Qingqi
Shang Qinghua
Also by Airplane extension, possibly Luo Binghe. No I will not elaborate.
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sunaswife · 4 years ago
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Summary: It’s been five years since you’ve seen your ex, Rin. He’s still not over you and you’re not over him. When he finds out you have children he thought he didn’t have a chance. Then he finds out they’re his? All of a sudden you’re teaching Suna how to be a single dad.
A/N: I made some new friends who are fellow writers on discord and my heart I— 🥺 cookie if you’re reading this be the ryu to my saeko
Warnings: Fluff, angst I guess, drama, and cuteness twin overload
Previously Up Next Masterlist
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Chapter five
“And the champions are MSBY Black Jackals! Y/N, was that an amazing game or what?!” Your co-commentator said as he turned to you. “That was probably one of the best games I’ve seen all season. I find it crazy that I managed to see the first game Ninja Shoyo and Tobio had against eachother in middle school and Tobio’s team won by a landslide but now watching them both after all this time? Wow it’s just amazing. The Jackals deserve this win.” You said and he nodded.
When the game ended you saw your kids run up to Bokuto and Atsumu and you mentally groaned as the sound tech tried to remove the headset and the wireless mic from your pants. You then sighed in relief when Hinata hugged them both and took them away. Jamie took a picture of Hinata and your kids because he wanted to post a before and after of when they looked like little potatoes.
You didn’t have a chance to go back to your kids or even congratulate Hinata. You were swiftly taken away by Kuroo and the rest of the team for a quick meeting. Your face turned bright red when they all praised you for doing an amazing job and how intriguing you made the match sound. You knew a lot of the monster generation due to nationals and training camps and your cousin and the people loved how you talked a little more about how much their favorite players have grown since you’ve been there to see it all.
When the meeting ended you texted Jamie to meet you in the hallway near the locker rooms. Tobio wasn’t answering your texts and you wanted to see if he wanted to come over to your home so you could all eat and watch a movie to end the first day of your new job. Tobio is probably upset about his loss but he acknowledged how much stronger Hinata has gotten so he probably shouldn’t be too beaten up about it.
The hallway was empty occasionally a few workers passed by. Kuroo wanted to speak with you after but he was held back by other responsibilities and he asked to call you and you nodded with a soft smile. So now you waited alone for Tobio, Jamie and your kids to make their way.
You heard a few foot steps so you turned to see familiar faces and If seeing Atsumu today wasn’t good enough imagine seeing his twin and your ex boyfriend?
It’s too soon.
You quickly turned your head and started walked to where the locker rooms were and the footsteps moved faster. “Kageyama wait!” Suna said, his voice was deeper and he pleaded so desperately. You close your eyes and stop walking. Their footsteps slowed and you turned around. Even in heels you were facing his chest. He certainly looks ever more fit in person then in pictures you managed to see on the internet. His hair was slightly shorter but he was handsome as ever. You slowly looked up to meet his fox like eyes and it felt like forever.
“Um...hi..how’s everything?” You asked awkwardly, “Everything is fine I guess. I went pro.” He said quietly and you smiled. His eyes softened, you looked so beautiful and mature. You now wore your hair down, in beautiful curls. You’re wearing heels, high heels. You also are wearing a little more makeup then what you used to wear in highschool but you still looked breathtakingly beautiful. He saw you doing your thing up there in the commentator stand and he was beyond proud how how far you’ve come and he hopes you’re just as proud of him.
“That’s wonderful, Suna.” You said softly and his heart clenched.
No.
Call me Rintarou, Rin, babe, anything but Suna.
“Hello, Kageyama. It’s been a long time.” Osamu spoke up and you turned to him. “It has, how’s everything?” You asked him. “Finally took the culinary path, I own a restaurant called Onigiri Miya.” He said. “That’s amazing. I’m so happy for both of you but I really need to go—“
“So soon? We were looking for you everywhere.” Suna said quickly, “Tsumu told us you were here.” Osamu said and you gritted your teeth. “Son of a bitch can’t keep his mouth shut.” You huffed. Their eyes widened, since when did you have a potty mouth?
“How long have you been a commentator?” Suna asked, “This was my first pro match. I used to be a ref for highschool, middle school and elementary teams.” You said and he nodded. You heard little footsteps at a fast pace and children’s laughter.
Holy shit.
This is not good.
Oh my god.
“I told you kids to stop running!” You heard Jamie and the two men turned to see Jamie chasing after those two brats from earlier. “Jamie?” Osamu said in disbelief. “Where’s mommy? She said she’ll be here. I wanna tell her that Rubens asked me to marry him.” Akira said and your eyes widened. Your daughter looked up and she screamed. “ITS MIYA ATSUMU!” She yelled, “I get to see you again!” She said as she ran. “Akira don’t run without me!” Rini yelled. Before your daughter could come tackle Osamu you quickly made your way between the two men and you scooped them both up in one swift motion. “How many times have I told you guys to not run in the halls?” You said with your back facing the two men.
The secret was out. You’re screwed. There is nothing you can do now. “A lot.” They said deafeated in unison. “And how many times have I told you to stop bulldozing people?” You asked. “A lot.” They replied robotically.
“Then why do you both keep misbehaving? When I’ve told you many times not to.” You said and set them down.
“Sorry, mommy.”
“Mommy?” Suna asked, your twins finally turned a bit to see who that mystery man was and they gasped.
“Yeah, I’m their mom.” You cleared your throat and you turned and straighten your posture.
“The cats out of the bag.” Atsumu said as he leaned against the wall. Since when has he been there?
“Oh—ok..” he said quietly. Now he knows he doesn’t have a chance anymore. Whoever you’re with is lucky to have you as a wife and the mother of their children. But he should have known, you’re a catch. Who wouldn’t want you as their wife?
“Mommy, is he our dad.” Rini spoke and you almost choked. Atsumu actually spit his water and Jamie and Osamu almost fainted.
Wait what?!
“The what?” Suna asked. “Rini no—“ you said quickly. “He’s not? But we look the same. And you have a photo of him in your box under your—“ “That’s enough.” You cut him off. You didn’t like using that tone with him or Akira but you don’t know how Suna is going to react.
“T-they’re mine?” Suna spoke up. “No—I mean yes—I mean. It’s complicated. Why don’t you give me your phone number and we can meet up privately and talk about it.” You said quickly. This was so embarrassing, and just awkward. Especially in front of everyone.
“It’s a simple question, Y/N. It’s either a yes or a no. Which is it so I can leave or I can get on the phone with my lawyer.” His whole demeanor changed and your kids hid behind your legs. His eyes narrowed at their actions. “Lawyer for what?” You asked. “Yes or no.” He ignored your question. Jamie took a step forward but Atsumu grabbed her shoulder to stop her and she quickly smacked it away.
“Yes, you’re their father.” You said and he sighed and rubbed his face. “Why didn’t you tell me?” He immediately asked. “I tried to.” You told him. “When?” He asked. “A week before I was due.” You replied. “Which was what..? In September? I got a new number. How could you act so stupid.” He said and you gasped. “Excuse me?” You immediately got defensive. “You’re calling me stupid?” You asked. “Yeah well you could have found other ways if you really tried!” He said, “The twins didn’t change their numbers, you knew my address. There was no excuse for you to not tell me.” He said and you scoffed. “Sorry for being depressed that my first boyfriend started dating me over a stupid bet and I was traumatized from dealing with a pregnancy all on my own. Sorry for caring more about you—“
“How were you caring about me? Huh? Tell me!” He said with a raised voice. In all honesty you raised your voice first. “Rintarou, were you willing to give up everything? Volleyball, college, happiness, to raise two children? Were you willing to sleep on the cold floor in a cramped studio apartment, wishing you had enough money to buy yourself a bed. But you needed to feed your kids and buy them clothes. Tell me rin, would you have done that?” You screamed. “Would you be willing to suffer and deal with strangers and family members telling you how stupid and how much of a whore you were for having children so young. I didn’t tell you so that I save you from that. So you could do this.” You motioned. “So you could go pro and live your dream. Believe me Suna I was going to tell you eventually. When I had a feeling you were ready.” You said.
“I did this for you.” Your voice cracked.
“Mommy we’re sorry. We don’t need a dad, let’s go home.” Rini spoke up and he pulled your pants leg. “When you cry it makes me cry mommy, please stop.” Akira’s voice shook. You reached down to rub their heads.
“Well, Rin. There you have it. There you all have it.” You said and glanced at the twins and at Tobio and Hinata who were peering over the wall. You pressed under your eyes to stop the tears. “If you want to be in their life, let me know. If not then don’t waste my time and ask me stupid questions. I did what I did for a reason, not because I was being petty.” You spoke up.
So what should he do?
He just stood there in complete shock. So you took that as your answer. “Well if you excuse me, it’s late and I need to get my kids in bed. They have school tomorrow.” You said and held their hands as you passed by Suna and Osamu, you didn’t dare look at Atsumu and Hinata and Kageyama’s heart broke when they saw the single tear fall down your face.
You didn’t look back, but your kids did. And they looked at their father with so much hurt and betrayal. They’re homeschooled, you as their mother and teacher get to decide what they learn. Normal kindergartners learn how to spell their names and read. But they’re already advanced, I mean you were the top student in your class. Made sense you’d turn your children into kid geniuses. They were already fluent in English as well, and they read a lot. Not because they have to but they genuinely like it. Akira can sit for hours and Rini did too but after a few pages he starts rambling and giving a book report about all the interesting things he read.
They’ve read books and seen shows and movies of a perfect family. A son, a daughter, a mother, a father, and a dog or cat.
That’s all they wanted.
They wanted a complete family. They want to see their father reach up to the highest shelf to help you grab some plates, and they wanted him to read them books, they even wanted to know if their father liked listening to old rock bands and watching anime like you and them.
They wanted to know if there was anything similar between their father and them other than appearance. But they would never know that. They finally saw Rin turn and he looked at those two kids, it’s honestly scary how similar they look to him. He took a step towards you, but before they could tell you, you turned the corner and they decided it was best to just drop it.
They didn’t need a dad anyways, right?
They’re doing just fine with a single mom.
They’re just feeling selfish, right?
But they don’t understand, they’re only five.
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A/N: childhood trauma at its finest smh I’m in tears why tf do u still read this shit 😫😭
🏷: @therealwalmartjesus @differentballooncollection @aaesuki @atsunflower @dope-squish @prettysetterboiss @june-phantom @tomo-uwu @austriasmariazelle @xrnia @katsulia @aprettyfruit @shut-your-eyes-kiss-me-goodbye @tvbiio @sun-daddy-yoriichi @kamenoyaki @ppangiiroo @loeyprivvv @kmskj92 @lovinnoya @sarahvvictoria @tris-does-stuff @mokkeguts @sunaluvr6969 @bara-rose-would @sempiternal-amour @volleybloop @leykyuu @bokutoichigo @stfucanunot @tpwkatsumu @ohshirabu @shoutosimp @mqrinqcele @bokutosdivineass @anngelllla @toworuu @hidden-otaku-stuff @seijohiselite @caxsthetic @aquariarose @hhwanggu @bakuhoetoedoroki @yoozuku @osamus-onigiri @akaashi-todorki @donica95 @kakaokenma @airheadpillar @sredamancy
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nenya85 · 3 years ago
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Find the Word Game
Thank you @hergan416 for tagging me!  My words were blood, gasp and strategy.  I tried to scatter my picks among my stories.
BLOOD
“A River in Egypt”
Yugi laughed. As expected, Kaiba's car was sleek and powerful. Yugi tried to place the color. It was a mix of crimson and purple, soft but with a hint of blood. Something in it teased at his memory.
"Do you want a lift?" Kaiba asked.
"Thanks," Yugi said. As he got in, he realized why the color was so achingly familiar. It matched Atem's eyes. "I miss him, too." 
“The Newly Revised Book of the Dead”
Two heroines forced into a semblance of death. Two heroes, compelled to find them. We all know that "Romeo and Juliet" is a classic tragedy, while "Sleeping Beauty" is a fairy tale, and in knowing their classifications, we think we know everything.
But think what a small change it would be to add the words "The tragedy of…" before Sleeping Beauty's name… or to start "Romeo and Juliet" with the words, "Once upon a time…"
What would happen then? Would Sleeping Beauty's prince fight his way through that forest of thorns to stagger to her bedside, bloody and battered, with only enough breath left to kiss her perfect lips? What if Sleeping Beauty finally woke up from 100 years of waiting, of dreaming of her true love, only to find his lifeless body stretched out on the bed beside her? In her madness and grief, would she pierce her broken heart with the stiletto-like thorn that still clung to her never-to-be lover's unmoving form?
And what if Romeo and Juliet got the fairy-tale ending they deserved? After all, in a fairy tale, no matter how many messages may go awry in the course of the story, one so critical would never miscarry so close to the end. Would Juliet have opened her eyes to see Romeo's face bending over hers, ready to welcome her back to life with a kiss? Would he have swept her off her tomb, onto his horse, and into their happily ever after future?
GASP
“Return to Romance”
Yami knew they were both supposed to be frozen with fear... horrified statues turned to stone by a Medusa's glare. They were supposed to be howling in terror, more than halfway on the road to insanity, or lying on the ground dying as their hearts exploded against the confines of their ribs.
Yami knew it would be safer to shut his eyes or look away and to warn Kaiba to do the same, but Kaiba was bathed in the reflected light of his horrors, rising out of their fast coalescing forms. Kaiba had never looked more beautiful, more like an angel about to plummet into the depths of Hell. Yami found himself devouring Kaiba's lips as if he was a duel monster and Kaiba was his prey, as he ground his body against his rival's until doom itself lost all meaning.
Demons and monsters had never been a novelty to Kaiba; he already knew that the world was full of them. None of that mattered, not when Yami was in his arms. And that's when Kaiba faltered. When suddenly, the man that Kaiba was holding seemed less real than the monsters lying in wait. Kaiba gasped in pain as the Talons of Shurilane raked across his back. He caught a glimpse of sapphire claws as the monster reared back to strike again. 
"Kaiba!" Yami called out. "You're not alone. Don't forget that. I'm here!"
"Are you?" Kaiba asked, his voice vacant. "Or are you the final, cruelest illusion?"
STRATEGY
“A River in Egypt”
Atem laughed. "You're the one who traveled to the Netherworld looking for a duel. I'm curious to see what you've got. So far, your strategy of trying to bulldoze everyone and everything in your path is ridiculously familiar. You're going to need more than that to take me down."
Kaiba growled in response. Atem leaned into the half-feral sound, as if he could breathe it in. No one else taunted and threatened him. No one else made his breath catch with that exact combination of annoyance and excitement. Kaiba was an ache that he had one last chance to ease. Kaiba was a rasp under his skin that he had one last chance to exorcise for both their sakes. Kaiba was an invitation to a brawl and Atem had one last chance to throw himself into the fray.
I’m tagging @commaeleons  @mimsiical @bnomiko and @rainstormcolors  if you want to!  The words are: Hope, glare, reach
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boiling-paint · 3 years ago
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.05: Underground
The light moved past his vision as it continued on, letting him finally see the engine. He turned to look at his siblings in excitement, but his smile dropped when, suddenly,
He was alone.
————
Note: Hi! This is my au where theres a third submas sibling (not twin, just younger.) What do Emmet and them do when Ingo disappears? :) Guess we'll find out. Been fighting back n forth on wether or not to make the third sibling an oc or gn!reader insert so we can all live a little selfishly, so maybe leave a comment on your thoughts!
BLANKSHIPPERS DNI pls istfg dont touch this. Pls. Hiss scratch hiss.
-
Anyways uh, here goes prologue :).
----
The wind was a chilled breeze, cooling summer hot skin in the afternoon sun. Another beautiful day in the Unova region, creatures roaming free and everyone out and about, enjoying the world of Pokémon. Ingo and his siblings were no exception.
Their shoes stomped over grass, rocks and puddles as the three of them traveled down the beaten path. After their mother had briefly mentioned a railway being finished just outside the town, it was the only thing on their minds. Emmet was already ahead of him and their little sibling. He eagerly forged a path for them, matching his Archen as they bulldozed down the grass, sneakers and talons in messy succession of one another. He wondered briefly what kind of Pokémon he may have, when the time came for it. The mystery of Archen’s appearance remained just that, but it certainly took a liking to  Emmet the most out of the three of them. 
A brief flash of their vest caught his eye, turning around he noticed they had fallen, scraping their knee. Quickly he called out to his sibling.
“Are you okay?” The small smile was reassuring before their face returned to its regular neutral state, brushing off their knee as he helped them up.
“Yeah, let’s catch up with--”
“Hurry! It’s almost arrived!” At the news they both skittered ahead to meet Emmet at the edge of the dirt. The levee rose quite high, the reflection off the metal tracks like stars as Ingo looked south to see if he could spot the locomotive. They all waited with baited breath, grass curled between fingers in nervous excitement. 
At the sound of the familiar low, drawn-out horn Ingo quickly looked to the north instead- and there it was; a broad, full headlight became brighter than the sky for a moment, a beacon to light his smile as his chest bloomed with energy. He felt Emmet's hand on his shoulder, shaking him excitedly as his sibling did their own little dance on the other side of him. The light moved past his vision as it continued on, letting him finally see the engine. He turned to look at his siblings in excitement, but his smile dropped when, suddenly,
He was alone.
The wind was a cold breeze, cooling frozen skin in the low-lit space. Ingo took a sharp breath, looking around as he regained his senses. He stood on something smooth and tough, the other foot on a softer but hardy material. His coat kept out the wet chill of the cave as he tried to take in his surroundings.
His mind cleared quickly at the familiar low, drawn-out horn of the train. He spun only to face the burning light of the locomotive's headlight once again. His chest bloomed with fear. The whistle blared loud, ringing in his ears. He felt his dread-filling heart about to burst from its spot, legs moving on their own as they backpedaled on the tracks and Igno turned on his heel to run. It was the only thing he could do. The ground shook under his feet. The gravity of the situation was fast approaching, and there was no end in sight. Everything was pitch black, only exception the glittering steel of the tracks he stumbled over, his own breath fanning in the cold in front of him. He felt the whistle blow this time, filling his chest so big it might burst, wheels against the tracks like snare drums snapping his body into blind, fearful action. 
There was no chance, not in the pits of hell. But he kept running. And when the ground became too shaky to stand on and his foot caught under the wood frame of the rail, he turned to look behind him, glancing one last time as the engine roared closer...
..
Ingo’s stomach flipped as he suddenly kept falling. 
The earth tilted on its axis and a silvery white overtook his vision, his body drowned in nausea as gravity- no, -time and space, churned and evolved around him. His head swam, too full and too loud. Yet his body felt light somehow. The universe swirled, quiet and roaring and full and empty and infinite and microscopic. 
His unsightly demise had been interrupted, but by what? 
He was suddenly everything and nothing before the world finally solidified back into place, and yet he kept falling.
Ingo blacked out before he hit the ground.
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loquaciousquark · 4 years ago
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Talks Machina Highlights - Critical Role C2E111 (Redux! Oct. 13, 2020)
Gooooood evening good evening good evening, all! I started the VOD late for this recap and somehow the first four or so minutes of the show have a Twitch audio copyright claim, so I am reduced to only reading Brian's lips when he asks if we're on the internet. Hilariously, Marisha's background room is a comfy-looking blue/gold fabric wall with a ceramic colorful abstract lamp and a yellow silk scarf over the lampshade, and Taliesin's is an industrial looking games room in grey and black with multiple monitors, overhead speakers, and mysterious metal fixtures behind him. What a treasure this group is, honestly.
Tonight's guests: Marisha Ray & Taliesin Jaffe, discussing episodes 110 and 111 again. I wildly speculate once more about what might have caused their absence: jury duty? Sam appearing on The Masked Singer? Something to do with the animated show? One day, we’ll know, one day... (One day this “copyrighted audio” section will come back from the wars, too. Ugh!) Finally! The audio comes back to reveal Brian discussing the endless reality of digital meetings and Marisha talking about (I think) her glare-reducing glasses she’s wearing. Welcome to the New Age (welcome to the New Age, to the New Age).
Announcements: Marisha suggests checking out Dimension20, another live tabletop gaming group, which premieres live on Wednesdays at 4pm (CollegeHumor). 
Brian immediately wants to know how they feel about the revelation that Molly is alive. Taliesin’s personal reaction: he “knows some things” he can’t talk about and is aware of several possibilities that might be going on, but had a sneaking suspicion that there would not be a body for them to find. He says it’s almost all there for anyone to see in past material. Marisha’s personal reaction: she just wants to know how she’s doing with her theories, & was trying to block Tal’s face out deliberately as she was going off on her theories in the last episode. Taliesin says he thought her ideas were pretty good!
Cad has no clue what to think - it’s like listening to your friends talk about Buffy. Marisha thought it was a 50/50 Molly would still be there, but Beau had no idea. Not that it mattered, because as soon as Matt went through with it the reveal still blew their minds. Tal laid out his plans for the character with Matt during Campaign One (towards the end) after they all got their VM tattoos.
It is a “horrifying and gross” thing to dig up a body, and Beau was pretty reluctant to do it. Tal, as Cad: “Sometimes dead’s better.” The moral quandary of trying to speak with a dead friend was very different here than the frequent occasions they used the spell in C1.
Taliesin says his poker face is very bad, so it’s easier for him to over-react and let it all play out. The only other player he can see very easily from his place in their current setup is Travis, and because he knows Travis doesn’t watch TM, tweet, or participate in social media, he admits he thoroughly enjoyed watching Travis freak out at his freaking out. He says he only knew about 20% of what Matt described at the end of that episode. He was picking things to mug to increase Travis’s surprise. I love this so much.
Taliesin provided the table left leg shake; Travis provided table right. Ha!
Beau is really accepting her role in the Cobalt Soul. It’s good when “as a person, you feel like you can settle into your calling. Sometimes you can do more from the inside than fighting from the outside.” It’s a mirrored but opposite path of Keyleth from C1; Beau felt like she was too good for her duty, while Keyleth thought she wasn’t good enough.
Caduceus is not a big believer in jumping to conclusions. He does have an idea/notion of the “city of the undead” and thinks all this necrotic energy must come from somewhere, and wonders if this is the “capital of anti-death.” He’s willing to believe whatever he sees. This is one of the few things that trigger a bit of loathing and disgust in him. It was terrifying that the Wildmother didn’t know anything.
Beau is pretty confident in her Charlie Day impression laying-out-the-research last episode. She enjoyed taking the things that were known & extrapolating around them; this is a huge facet of Marisha’s own personality and she really enjoys it, so she built a character this time that would allow that kind of puzzle-solving. It’s also why she repeatedly notes when Beau journals, so she can avoid metagaming. Trent’s mention of Vess Durogna’s tomb raiding was completely circumstantial, and the only reason she’d made the connection to the Tombtakers was because she’d recently reviewed those notes for a separate unannounced project. Sometimes she tries to make connections and Matt is like, “It was...just descriptive. Just flavor. The curtains were red...” and she has to discard a paragraph of notes. She feels like it’s still something they have to do because of “look at what he does! Look! It’s totally valid!”
Cosplay of the Week: @kitsunstudios with a gorgeous Caduceus with a very intricate silk vest.
Caduceus’s takedown of Trent! One of my favorite moments in the entirety of C2. Taliesin felt Trent was an asshole; Caduceus felt sorry for him because of how dumb he thought he was. Caduceus’s response was "this is the dumbest man I’ve ever met in my life. He’s so dumb! Is nobody going to tell this guy how dumb he is? Oh, they’re all freaked out. Somebody needs to tell this guy he’s an idiot before somebody gets hurt.” (Marisha: “Before?”) Tal says it was the product of several years of therapy and many drunk conversations with Whitney Moore. It was from a genuine place of concern from Caduceus. “How are you allowed to have this much power and be that dumb?”
Brian loved how funny it was to watch everyone tiptoe around Trent and then Caduceus bulldoze through the end of the meal.
Taliesin: “Damage doesn’t make you interesting or better. It’s not what makes you good. Character isn’t found in damage. Just recovery.”
Brian & Marisha commiserate going through the stage where believing surviving something automatically made you a stronger person, better for the pain; instead it just meant you had to pick up the pieces after. Marisha talks about how strength through survival may be true for some people, but it shouldn’t be considered a necessity. Taliesin talks about how he used to think he had to be miserable to write. Brian talks about how believing he liked reading and writing miserable things only limited him for years.
Marisha feels it’s a C2 theme that almost all the PCs have someone trying to handwave or take credit for their accomplishments or explain their pain as being for their own good (Trent, Beau’s dad, Obann). She thinks it’s interesting to see all the various ways people try to take credit for your work/delegitimize you as a person. She loves that RPGs allow you to explore these odd moralities in interesting ways. The only way to fight it is to have a sense of your own self-worth, which is a problem a lot of the M9 started with.
Caduceus likes everyone, and really likes people who appear to need role models (Eodwulf). “With the right friends and the right bar and the right attitude, I think he’d be okay. Come over here where it’s so much better. That seems like an exhausting friendship that you have there.”
Marisha loves the mix of personalities in the M9; Veth, Cad, & Jester were all “we kind of like them!” after the dinner, and she immediately made eye contact with Travis and they both shook their heads. She knows Beau has to go along with it for Caleb’s sake for now, but she & Fjord are pretty sus of Trent’s proteges.
Beau is less concerned about Artagan’s relationship to Jester because “he showed his ass--she’s less worried about Jester now because a little of the magic is gone.” It’s a little like becoming an adult and realizing your parents are also just adults & human. Caduceus wasn’t suspicious of the Traveler for a long time until they got to the island. Aside: Taliesin loves the pantheon in D&D. “The notion of attempting to apply common Western conceptions of religion to a world where you have a pantheon of interventionist gods as baseline makes no sense to me. Everyone admits that every other god is there and doing shit; it has more in common with ancient Rome than anything else.” Now that he knows it was a con, he feels the wind had been taken out of it. He does have a sense that Jester’s gotten back together with an ex: “I hope that I’m really happy for you.” They’re both interested to see how Jester navigates the new relationship.
My internet goes out, of course. I panic for a second, thinking I’ve lost everything above, but all is well! Thanks, Form History Control addon!
Marisha loved punching Artagan, but regretting rolling so poorly. “I miss violence.” Dani lets us know it’s been about four episodes since the last battle.
There’s no way the Cobalt Reserve doesn’t have a single document on the Eyes of Nine. Beau believes “there are no real secrets” because people are just bad at not writing things down. For there to be no information at all seems really suspicious for her.
Fanart of the Week: @oddalchemist on twitter with some awesome Beau conspiracy red-thread boards overlaid a distant shadowy Molly walking away.
Caduceus feels a little guilty for really enjoying his time right now with the M9 and not wanting to go home. He’s starting to suspect that he’s going to go home very different than when he left. “He has the softest problems. I don’t know if I want to move back in with Mom & Dad.”
Beau is trying to get comfortable with the idea of being happy. Jester is probably Beau’s first real best friend & one of the first healthy female friendships she’s ever had. As long as she still has Jester in her life, she doesn’t care. For Yasha... “At the end of the day, Beau is a lonely person and has always been a lonely person. And I think you kinda reach this point where once you’re not lonely anymore, you can kind of come out of the fog and realize that was horrible! And terrifying! And is even more terrifying now that I know what I could have, and I don’t want to go back to that. At the end of the day Beau doesn’t want to be lonely anymore. There’s always been that flirtation with Yasha, but everyone had to figure their own shit out. And now it feels like it’s coming out a little bit of that haze, maybe this actually could be...” There are a lot of ways they complement each other & are good-different from each other. Marisha believes people can be attracted to more than person at once.
Caduceus doesn’t think nature turned against him on Rumblecusp, it was just a reality of nature being dangerous and violent. “He has a complex relationship with nature.” He doesn’t expect special treatment.
Thoughts on the mansion: “Man, it’s nice to be seen.” Marisha: “I don’t know how I ended up becoming the Scanlan of this campaign, but I’m living for it.” It felt like an echo of “I’m better for having known you.” They compare Marisha taking specific notes on the campaign to Liam taking specific notes on people’s favorite tapestries, comics, etc.
They talk about missing theme parks and daydream a park version of the mansion in CritRoleLand. It’s lovely.
Taliesin never expected Divine Intervention to work; he just wanted to roll some dice. He’s still processing what he saw/heard. They all agree it was very useful in the Vokodo fight.
Vilya! Marisha: “Ah! Ah! Ah!” As a player, Marisha was so deep in Beau’s eyes she didn’t pick up it was Vilya at first (especially since Matt really emphasized they should not be looking for C1 NPCs). Marisha’s brain melted. She bawled her eyes out on the ride home after that episode. Right after it ended, Laura told Marisha “Keyleth finally gets her happy ending,” and it makes Marisha emotional again since Keyleth’s story ended so bittersweetly. She talks about the very real feelings of “just wanting them to be happy, though!” She went back and listened to all her old Keyleth playlists. Everyone was teary after the episode. “Everyone has these 100% real memories of being these characters and having these good times.”
And that’s that for that! Thanks for your patience, all, and is it Thursday yet?
189 notes · View notes
bunnieresources · 4 years ago
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no straight roads writing prompts.
“ the biggest change can come from the most unexpected individual. “
“ this is my moment. this is what it’s all about. “
“ your hair is fine! come on, this our debut! “
“ very well, then. show me what you’ve got. “
“ hold on, hold on. i’ll be blunt. you came here for me to judge you. “
“ please. i run on talent, not fairness. “
“ see that? it means you’re done. “
“ if i were you, i would swallow my pride. “
“ no! i’m an artist! i’m a performer! a performer! i belong on the stage! “
“ you think you can just walk in here and drag us all into your silly fantasy? “
“ stop living in the past! “
“ can’t believe they called us naïve... “
“ that was buuullldozer! bulldozer, you hear me! “
“ they can’t do this to us! it’s not cool! super not cool! “
“ listen, i know this didn’t go as you planned, but it’s not good getting worked up over an empty stomach. “
“ this is totally rigged! we need to take action! “
“ there’s always something we can do, ____. believe me. “
“ ____... if i could see your face, i’d punch it. “
“ i hate to say this... but i think you might be onto something. “
“ billions upon billions of organisms reside on this tiny planet. each meticulously designed to fulfill their given purpose. yet... you barely reach the cusp of mediocrity! “
“ huh? you don’t remember me? ____, that’s who i am! “
“ hmm. that is fascinating―your limited aspirations, your misplaced efforts. “
“ your intellect is strikingly shallow, as everyone else’s is. “
“ you have barely, barely scratched the surface of my brilliance! i am done stooping to your level of idiocy! “
“ ____, come in! what is going on down there?! “
“ you better believe it! i’m not stopping ‘til i claim my fame! “
“ you think you’re better than me?! “
“ we have the force to deal with the likes of you! we fight with order, and you have no place in our system. “
“ if that’s what you stand for, then i want no part of your stupid regiment! “
“ did you have to punch the TV, though? we don’t have money to spend on another one. “
“ our revolution is set on a long and difficult path, so sacrifices must be made for the greater good. “
“ ah, you’re so mean! how could you not take me seriously? look at me! “
“ hey, how about you come down here and face me! “
“ i’m too cute to fight! “
“ aren’t these ones and zeroes wonderful? through them, i can link my feelings with all my fans around the world! “
“ i’ve made up my mind! get out! you’re no longer welcomed here! “
“ why that door sure looks inviting! “
“ i’m just here to receive your apology. come on, i don’t have all day! “
“ you’re always like that, angry only! “
“ you only won because i let you. “
“ okaaaay, i’m sensing a lot of anger here... “
“ you need to speak up! the acoustics here isn’t designed for speech clarity! “
“ i hate you all! i so hate you all! “
“ oh you’re still talking? why don’t you come here and say that to my face! bring it! BRING IT! “
“ hey! i’m crashing your party! hello? ____! “
“ you mess with my troops, you mess with me! “
“ just as i thought, you share none of my artistic perception. “
“ we can save each other, as today, we celebrate your redemption, ____. “
“ open your mind, sink into my gaze, and let yourself be born again! “
“ you do not deserve this. you do not deserve any of this! “
“ you are one of them, ____! you fear me! as you should. “
“ everything is nothing. why should i continue to entertain this void? “
“ ____, i’m sorry. i’m sorry i couldn’t be the person you wanted me to be. “
“ i’m not like you. i wish i was, but i’m not. “
“ you don’t need anyone else to complete you. you complete yourself. “
“ you have always been stronger than me. if anyone can do it, it’s you, ____. “
“ one, i didn’t ask for your admiration. two, take responsibility for your own stupid actions. and three, never have heroes, ____. “
“ never have heroes, ____. believe me, you’ll have fewer disappointments. “
“ did my loyalty mean nothing to you? not even a little bit? “
“ listen here, ____. i don’t give a damn about you, understand? i owe you nothing. “
“ i don’t deserve any hero’s welcome. not after all the things i’ve done. “
122 notes · View notes
mci-writing · 4 years ago
Text
Attachment (Villain!Midoriya Izuku x Reader)
A/n:This fic was originally meant to be posted July 20th for @birds-have-teeth‘s Izumonth Server Collab! I enjoyed writing for this event and I hope you all enjoy this fic!
Warnings: Somewhat mature themes; reader is a sex worker; gun use; non-consensual touching of naked skin, but not quite groping; Slightly ooc Midoriya Izuku; Reader implied to not be the greatest at defending themselves
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There’s a certain loneliness that comes into your mind when you’ve been put down all your life. It’s a form of depression everyone faces once in a while, one that hits some a little harder and hits others a bit less. Then there’s always a trigger and it hits some so low it’s nearly impossible for them to pick themselves back up. 
Some have no idea where their sudden upset came from, settling for letting the slump pass over instead of getting to the root and removing that unneeded variable. Others know exactly what set off the feeling and rather hide it from themselves, wearing a facade over their emotions until they finally can’t handle all the turmoil. That usually leads to… unruly situations and one to a few lives get taken in the process. 
Midoriya has observed enough to know that this… weak point can be manipulated into getting people tricked up in numerous webs for his own self gain. What point in time varies on the person and the situation, but people usually get pretty desperate once all the pieces finally hit just a little too deep for them to shake off the depressive state of unwantedness. He knows all too well himself what paths unwarranted thoughts lead you down when you’re trapped in desperation.
“Here’s the deal then… I help you if you help me,” However, as time passes and you’ve watched numerous people fall for the same trick from a couple of choice words, the small tug of remorse at the back of your mind eases into a silent plea of muddled feelings. Any struggle is resolved with a simple “for business” before he fast talks his way through another bungled, one-sided proposition that ends up with a once innocent civilian put behind bars for the blood they never had on their hands. Twisting fate in his scarred hands for the sake of his survival, “This whole situation will disappear if you just assist me in this one situation. You even get a cut”
There were a few successful missions here and there, and he always made sure to make his end of the deal rather quickly before anything could get too overly complicated. People would go missing and bank accounts would be filled with stolen money; Police turn their heads with a simple threat or bribe. Then the cycle repeats again and another kid that needs therapy gets sent down a dangerous path. If it was just a little over his jurisdiction, another body is left in the gutter of some busted neighborhood with little trace as to just what happened. 
And those that couldn’t wallow in the filth of their crimes usually handled their own punishment.
He learns to lay low, move places, but never forget names or faces. The process can be emotionally tolling on him at times. Certain situations tend to remind him of his times growing up, those hopeless situations that crawl from the depths of your mind and keep you up on late nights. He pushes them away and continues with his day, keeping an eye out for his next victims before he hits the road again. 
He passes numerous people on his way up to his apartment, his body swerving and curling in various ways to avoid the rambunctious space up the stairs and through the halls. He’s lucky to only bump into one person when he happens to glance away a moment. They’re also not paying much attention, squeaking out in surprise from the sudden collision and their hoodie falling in the aftermath. 
They fall back a bit, catching themself with their back-foot before they can fully trip up while Midoriya manages to hold himself from the impact. He’s forced to take in their features, finding himself gazing upon them a little longer than he intends before tearing his own emerald eyes away from their form before he can embarrass and draw extra attention to himself. It doesn’t help that their seemingly tantalizing, (e/c) eyes curiously stare up at him. His body warms in a way that reminds him of his prepubescent awkwardness and his cheeks light up a rare shade of red he’s normally able to keep composed.
He clears his throat before his feet begin moving again to quickly remove himself from the situation before he can open his mouth. He’s only able to have enough decency to give a half-assed apology in the midst of retreating to his home. His heart beats a little faster and takes awhile to calm.
~~~
He keeps notes on the surrounding tenants, documenting every inconvenience that they face and each unfortunate event that seems to surround their bubbles while he’s there. He tosses darts at possible targets daily as he keeps himself holed up in his small apartment. 
It’s a little more than surprising when you get a set of darts as a housewarming gift to accompany the usual “Yoroshiku onegai shimasu”, especially an expensive, name brand set of this caliber, but there are times where you get lucky, I guess? Then again, it came from the person he practically bulldozed his first day of being here and they insisted the incident was their fault, buying them as a “makeup gift” or something? The gift was accompanied with the information of their name as well. He wasn’t opposed and accepted them with open arms (of course, sending the darts in to his associates to check before he properly used them) before coming to the quick decision to distance himself just a little more than he usually does (because there’s something up with the way he finds himself just a little more on the warm side when he talks to them).
His room smells like katsudon from some random takeout restaurant from down the street that he picks up on his way home from those times he goes in and comes home late. He carries a duffel bag to and from his office, filling them with a spare set and replacing them on days things get messier than planned. There are days he finds bloody weapons he forgot to get rid of and days where his neighbors become curious of his occupation. Both are brushed off in the same manor, taken care of and disposed of respectively. 
He maps out the surrounding area for his next aim. He notes the various factors in notes, from the Pro heroes in this specific area to important landmarks he’d like to hit up for priceless souvenirs. He only takes a break to check and manage his time “responsibly”, but only the smell from his leftover boxes really distracts him by reminding him that he needs to probably get some food soon. It becomes a last priority each time he manages to push it away, but his body can only handle the denial for so long before he finally forces himself from his seat.
Midoriya steps out of his apartment once he gets everything he needs, pausing at the sight of his neighbor standing in front of their ajar door. He can only really see past it a bit, catching sight of maybe a chair and a stand? Their fingers are rummaging through a small pouch, their eyebrows furrowed and lips upturned in a pout as they search through it. He watches for a moment before releasing a sigh, walking up to them and clearing his throat to garner their attention.
“Are you looking for something?” He speaks up, his hands shoved in his pockets. His eyes catch the way their face lights up a shade or the nervous downturn their (e/c) eyes make. He takes note of the way their hold tightens around the pouch, the way they begin to sweat under his gaze before their eyes shyly glance back up at him.
“No. Not at all” They lie through their teeth, glancing down at their small bag one last time before they close it with a huff. They open their apartment door, sending him a quick smile, “Thanks for asking, though. I-I’ll see you around”
He stops himself from asking further, quickly nodding his own head and heading out the door of the building. He brushes the encounter off and instead focuses on getting himself a nice bowl of beef katsudon from down the street.
The trip doesn’t take him very long as he walks back in his apartment building with three plates stacked in a bag and a stick of pocky between his teeth. He stares ahead rather blankly as he mentally runs over the crap he’d recently gathered in passing. Some guy a few buildings down needs help with rent payment, a dad struggling over custody of his kid, and a washed up businessman needs enough money to get himself off the ground again. He grins to himself as his plans of another successful caper begin to formulate, so lost in his head he almost passes his door.
He pulls his keycard from his pocket, taking the time to swallow the cookie between his teeth before he gets the door opened. He pauses when he hears the door across the hall slam shut, his back straightening in panic and his body contorting to catch what happened. His eyes narrow at the hefty guy beside his neighbor’s door, rolling his eyes as the guy continues to knock at the door.
“Come on, (Y/n). You've gotta let me in. I’ve changed-” Midoriya sighs as he closes his door, his grip on his bag tightening as he fully turns around and walks up to him. He pulls on an old smile he only pulls in situations that are a little more sensitive and he prays it doesn’t seem disingenuous when he steps up to the door.
The guy is just a foot over Midoriya, bulkier and forcefully intimidating. His intimidation is so fake that Midoriya has to hold himself back from laughing. He settles for clearing his throat to garner the guy’s attention, holding the bag up and innocently tilting his head.
“Hey, is, uh, is (Y-Y/n) here? We sort of planned a l-lunch date for today…” He inwardly cringes at his own words, still managing to hold up the act. The idea of even doing something remotely that romantic with anyone was enough to get his cheeks flushing enough and his, as others say, green, doe eyes was enough to help pull off the innocent look for him.
 “You don’t seem like much..” The dude looks him over, lip upturned in judging disgust. Midoriya has to hold back a roll of his eyes, his free hand making it to his back pocket and setting itself inside as he waits for the guy to finish sizing him up. The smirk that comes to that guy’s face seems to piss Midoriya off just a little more, his voice now louder and taunting, “You really couldn’t do any better, (Y/n)?!”
“LISTEN HERE, YOU PIECE OF SHI- Midoriya? H-Hey!” The sudden yank of the door causes Midoriya to jump just a little more than he thought it would. Hearing their tone of voice and the sudden rise in volume was a little more than surprising to him, especially considering how quiet and to themselves they tended to be when he was around.
“I said you could call me Izuku, i-if you wanted. We’ve already been through so much as is, (Y/n),” He watches their (e/c) eyes dart between the bag in his hand, him, and the other guy standing next to him. They seemingly calm down a bit, a bit of a nervous smiling coming to their face at the sight of Izuku being there. He lifts the bag a little more, stepping to be more in their peripheral vision and reassuring them of the situation, “I hope you don’t mind katsudon…”
“Come on then, Izuku” They open the door a little wider with a kind smile, turning away from them before walking inside. Midoriya takes a moment before following behind, grinning as he closes the door in the guy’s face.
He doesn’t know what to expect when he walks inside, but the barren apartment was a bit of a surprise. It shouldn’t have been. He’s seen people with gaping holes in their walls and others with cow sized rodents running around. This wasn’t anything new at all, especially in such a cheap apartment complex, but it didn’t connect with the housewarming/apology gift he received from them the first week he moved in. There’s a flyer on a small table conveniently placed near the front door. Green eyes scan over the paper covered in various shades of lustful blues and accentuated pinks, swiping the leaflet with finesse and walking just a little further inside after removing his shoes. 
He pushes it to the back of his mind and instead focuses on sharing the katsudon he ordered. It was more than likely a little more lukewarm than either of them would have liked, but that isn't enough to wane his hunger as he pulls the take out bowls out of the bag. He passes (Y/n) some chopsticks, taking his own between his fingers and flipping the top off of his.
The two eat in silence. One believes it to be calming, allowing him to get a look around the room and properly inspect the other without seeming out of place, while the other finds it rather awkward as they search their mind for how to break it. When (y/n) finally does find the right words, they speak up almost meekly. It’s a great contrast from their fussing earlier, yet it was what Midoriya was used to hearing from them, “Sorry that you got involved with all… that”
That was one way to describe that encounter…
“It’s fine. We all deal with crazy people from time to time”
“Yeah…”
~~~
That wouldn’t be the last time Midoriya would find himself stepping into a similar situation for his neighbor across the hall. It seemed every week there was some dick outside waiting on them, trailing them home, or practically trying to force their way into their apartment. It seemed almost non-stop and was very distracting from his job. He had plans he needed to work out and pawns to create to go in his stead, but instead he was playing hero for his resident next door. He could make it easier on himself and ignore the pricks outside, let them have at them however they were looking to. Turn a blindeye to it all and pretend he has no idea when they inevitably go missing.
However, the flyer on his wall above his laptop reminds him that he just can’t do that. He has to watch over them for a reason and to just let that go out of sheer annoyance won’t feign him much luck when he finally sends his next team out to the field. If he has to feed them every night, have his goons keep watch of them on their way to work at the darkest hours of the night as well as their way home at the very crack of dawn, and leave them small gifts for the better fit of their survival then he’ll do just that to ensure that this deal doesn’t just slip away from his fingers. A sex worker is more than essential to the very job spending time with (Y/n) was distracting him from, especially if they knew their way around the underground of this neighborhood. 
They were good at their job, very good at their job. He’s visited once or twice, only really making his presence known as of late (how many times he has gone to see them prior to that is really only his concern and a personal choice on his part) so they’d talk more openly about it with him and stop dancing around their profession (pun intended). They had a proficiency to their movements that he’s rarely seen in such low par establishments which, added with their fluidity and attractiveness, made it pretty obvious why so many patrons try to find their way to (Y/n)’s apartment in an attempt to gain just a little more than a bit of lewd teasing.
His mind races with the various places and positions he can place them in for this to work, reminding him just how important it is for him to properly socialize with the tenant across the hall. Getting attached wouldn’t be much of a problem. It’s never been much of a problem to him before and it's not like he had much of a reason to keep up such a facade of caring after. Whatever happened to them after wasn’t much of his concern, even if taking them on for more missions later would make a couple a little easier-
That was the original objective, anyway. There’s no room for truly caring for someone when you’re working underground, no room for getting beside yourself and growing any bonds deeper than respected co-workers. Midoriya’s been doing this job for years, first starting out as an intelligence kid for one of the yakuza groups in his neighborhood. He’s seen what kind of hurt it can lead to by keeping people close and how climbing up the ladder of power adds to the heartbreaks caused. 
Midoriya feels himself sigh as he shakes himself from thinking on the subject any longer, going back to his map of the High Cape, an expensive bar upstreet commonly used as a venue for support item bidding. One support item in particular had his and everyone else in the industry’s attention. He knew a couple of villains that would bid ten times the amount of money the device would actually go for and he could definitely use the money for his future projects. With the various vents and ducts in the building (mainly for quirk occurrences rather than heating and cooling the building), he’d need someone with a quirk or some similar ability that would allow them to easily slip by. His eyes move up his table, landing directly on the perfect person: A tenant down the hall, practically a teenager living on her own. She’s small enough for it and she could definitely use a cut of the cash they’d get-
“Hey, Izuku? I’m using your shower again” Midoriya jumps in his seat at the sudden opening of his door, his hands scurrying to put everything out of view. He turns around just as the door closes behind his intruder, towel wrapped around their body and the sparkly new loofa he bought them the other day held tightly in their hand. He’s seen this sight so many times the past month and it still manages to make his cheek tinge a hint of red at the idea of a bare body being there (it doesn’t help he has a very good idea of just what lays under there from the various performances of theirs he’s attended). Times like this make him feel more like their overprotective sugar daddy than an employer trying to get them in a job.
“You sure you don’t want me to pay your water bill? I don’t mind” He reminds as he watches them make their way to his bathroom. His swivel chair moves with his body as he stretches, the satisfying cracks his bones makes causing him to hum out in misplaced pleasure. He doesn’t expect too much of an answer back once the shower water comes on, turning his chair back to his desk and grabbing his planning journal, “I’m pretty close to just doing it against your will!”
He opens it up, reading over it’s contents. He adds a few more spare details as he thinks the plan over, sighing once more as he thinks over his current lab rats. He’s already planted the seeds for a few needed pawns, catching sight of their responses to his anonymous proposal and enjoying the way many of them were quick to send their responses to their designated areas. It makes him chuckle each time he sees those so ready to change their situation “for the better”. Those same people who jump at the deal without hesitation tend to be the ones to fully follow the plan through, do everything they're supposed to and deliver what he needs to his palm, yet they also do the irrational once the deeds they’ve committed really sinks in.
“You’re always writing in that thing when I come over” He hears their wet footsteps on the tiled floor before he realizes the water’s cut off.
“Don’t sit on the bean bag chair until you fully dry off” His jade orbs slowly look up at (Y/n), a knowing look on his face when he looks up to find them loosely dressed in one of his old t-shirts and, hopefully, a pair of underwear. He finds himself frowning seeing the fabric stick to their wet body the way it did, accentuating parts of them that he wished other people didn’t see. He sets his notebook down and trades it’s position for his phone (purposefully bugged in a way to keep out peepers), “Have you eaten today?”
The shrug he receives reminds him that he shouldn’t have bothered asking before he orders them something through one of his subordinates. His eyes gaze over their body again, this time lingering just a little longer. He turns away again, ignoring the way his cheeks warm. 
Having them laid out on his bean bag chair, legs spread enough for him to get enough of a view to confirm that they were indeed wearing underwear added another rosy shade. It reminds him why he’s approaching them in such a protective way and why he has to make sure he gets close enough for them to trust him with their life.
“Do you trust me?” It’s a simple question. It should’ve been a straightforward response from here on out. He discretely reaches under his desk as they hesitate, keeping the steel device out of their line of sight as he stands to his feet. 
(Y/n) nervously grins as Midoriya slowly approaches and there’s this look in his eyes that they’ve never seen from him. They stand to their feet themselves in a wary manner, glancing around for any indication that this was just a prank that they’d laugh off in a few minutes, “Of course I trust you… You’ve already done so much for me, it’d be kinda crazy for me not to-”
“But with your life?” Their heart stops when he pulls the gun out and aims it their way, his index finger close to the trigger and ready to pull it so easily, “Are you willing to dedicate yourself to my case if your survival depended on it?”
“What the hell are you talking about?!” He shoots once, the bullet just barely missing them and perfectly hitting the center of his dart board on the wall behind them. A sign that that’s not what he wants to hear, “Izuku-”
“Are you going to listen to whatever I say when the time calls for it?” The smirk on his face holds nothing more than amusement as he stares them down, patiently awaiting their answer. His head tilts to the side, eyes narrowing slightly as he speaks again, “We both know I’m the only thing keeping you alive and well… I’m really not asking for much and it really benefits you in the long run”
Another hesitant, painfully awkward silence follows that statement as (Y/n) thinks over their options at the moment. They could either defy his request and die right here in his apartment or they could accept his request and do whatever he says to keep yourself alive and, most probably, be taken care of the way he has been taking care of them. It doesn’t take rocket science to decide which was better at the very moment, “I trust you, Izuku...”
“Call me Deku when you’re working” He takes a step forward, the gun still threateningly being held. He flips it in his hold before getting it in a comfortable position again, enjoying watching the person before him squirm under scrutiny at the possibility of a bullet shooting through them. The whole scene gave him excited goosebumps, his coy smile still on his face as he watches them reveal their nervous ticks before him. All of this because they really thought he’d shoot, “Take my shirt off”
He watches as it comes off, the sight of their bareness almost enough for him to put the gun down and properly take it in. He releases a breath through his nose, stepping forward enough for him to reach out and press his fingertips into their skin. He pulls (Y/n) closer, the gun pressing into their side as he enjoys the feeling of having them flushed to his chest.
“I could kill you so easily and no one would know…” He buries his nose in their neck, the cold metal pressing a little harder into their skin as his hold on them tightens. Deku feels the tremble in their breathing and it almost makes him chuckle as he’s quick to reassure, “A shot here would cause quite a bit of damage, but not an immediate kill-” He digs the barrel more into their skin, almost enough to leave an indent, before he lifts it to their forehead with a degrading laugh, “Here would definitely kill you immediately”
His hand eases down their side, relishing in the soft feeling of their skin and giving weightless squeezes. He stops just above their hip, fingertips brushing over the waistband of their underwear (which he ensures to pull back enough to startle them, but not really harm them), before his fingers slowly ease up with feather-like touches. He pulls back a bit and lifts the gun to their chin to have their (e/c) eyes meet his. The look they gave him seemed vacant, yet submissive in a way he wasn’t used to seeing from them. It causes a small ping in his heart and a soft shade to come to his face once he realizes just how close he was to the very naked (Y/n) in the middle of his apartment. 
“Stuff like this would leave you vulnerable during an assignment, y’know? I won’t always be there to protect you from getting taken advantage of…” He’s quick to back away, lifting their hand and setting the gun there. He closes their hand around the trigger, circling around and leading them to hold the gun up properly, “So I might as well teach you how to use it, right? A thank you gift”
He ignores the warm feeling in his chest at having them pressed against his body again (this time with the added bonus of him being more self aware) and continues with his instructing, pulling away to let them try at shooting at the target just above his desk. He throws advice towards them here and there as he grounds himself against, thinking over just how he was going to get through the rest of this without his feelings developing beyond this point.
He reminds himself that he was just trying to warn himself of this very things, his hands reaching over carefully and helping them aim just a little better. It allows him to get a feel for how cold they are, their goosebumps riled up against the skin of his palm enough indication. He tugs his jacket off before he carefully drapes it over their shoulders, lifting the wet shirt from before off the ground, “Go ahead and get comfortable again while I take care of this. The food’s right down the road”
“Hey, Izuku? I meant what I said about trusting you, even if it costs me my life in the long run…” He originally took their nod a bit ago as an okay sign of where they’d just left off and it would’ve been enough confirmation for him to retreat with the wet clothing in his hand. However, he stops once he hears them speak up for the first time since he forcefully interrogated their loyalty to him and their words are enough for his heart to pound in his chest a different way than the original adrenaline he’s used to feeling when having someone swear their allegiance to him, “I’ll do what I’ve got to if it means helping you after everything you’ve helped me with this past month”
Typically, Deku doesn’t find himself too concerned with those he signs contracts with. The process is cut and dry: He helps them and they help back. How they go about their lives after has nothing to do with him as long as they’re not caught snitching. He’s seen various different responses and scenarios play out with these random civilians, situations he’s learned to let happen as they are because they’re out of his jurisdiction. He knows he could probably save a few lives if he wanted with the power he has baking behind him and maybe he could save certain people from prison, even if they put themselves there.
None have managed to make him tear up the way he currently did. He realizes just how attached he’s gotten to (Y/n) in a little over a month (which is really a big jump when compared to the literal months he’s spent with others that were nothing more than irritating) and it’s so hard for him to just accept that they’ve taken the job without much hesitation or question. He knows what that can mentally do to a person, he’s seen it before his own eyes. There have been more than many times someone’s realized they got screwed over after putting everything they had into a job and then for them to take a gun, knife, or maybe even using their own quirk to take that last breath. He’s never been so… concerned over how someone’s life would be majorly fucked from agreeing to his terms.
And all he’s really left to do is mentally reprimand himself for allowing himself to get so attached to some random sex worker he met by chance in the midst of moving into his apartment building. This was going to be a little more than a mess of blood on his hands when he finally gets that support item.
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staticscreenwriting · 4 years ago
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California Summer - B.H. Smut [one]
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Synopsis: Kings Cove California is Billy Hargrove’s hometown. It’s also a popular summer vacation destination for rich couples and their spoiled kids. (Y/N) is one of those rich girls. Proper, sweet, innocent. Only that all bores her to death and Billy is just the adventure she’s been looking for. It’s all fun and games. A summer fling. Not strings attached. Right? 
Inspired by the songs “dreaming of you” and “Kiss it off me” by Cigarettes After Sex.
 A/N: This is smut, babes. Filthy. I will sit in the shame cube after I post it. Please if that is not fore you, don’t read it. Also do not interact if you’re under 18, that’s just not cool. Kay, thanks ♥
Might fuck around and make this a series.
[additional note: I am German. Sometimes I get the tense wrong or make mistakes. I am useless when it comes to punctuation. Go easy on me, please.]
There’s something about California summers, Billy thinks, thank makes them special. They’re hot and sticky and messy but they’re also exciting and exhilarating. The world seems to be dusted in a perpetual golden glow and days seem endless and full of possibility.
Maybe that sentiment is what brings all the tourists to the little coastal town of Kings Cove, California. A town caught between the undeniable charm of an old sleepy coastal town and the ever-expanding demand for tourist-friendly beach houses in gated communities where rich people can relish in the charm the town brings and then piss off once their vacation days are over.
Billy was born here, raised here until he was 17 and shipped off to forge his path in shitville Indiana. He was miserable then, but a shadow of himself. Angry and sad and overwhelmed by emotions he never learned to properly deal with. Singers and artists always seem to find something poetic about being young and angry and lost. Truth is: there’s nothing poetic about it, nothing romantic or desirable. It’s hard and it kills you slowly. Starting with your heart and then taking over every part of you, slowly but surely.
Soon as he turned 18 and was handed his High School diploma, Billy packed all his belongings into the Camaro and was off. The drive back to California, back home, it felt cleansing. Like a rebirth. A return to life at his own terms.
He got out. He survived. This, Billy is sure, he would always pride himself with no matter how trivial it may seem to anyone else. He got out. Not completely whole. Severely bruised. He got out with a heart so scared he’s sceptical it will ever fully heal. But he got out.
Though coming home didn’t come without its hardships and obstacles. There was nothing waiting for him here but a bunch of questions and an uncertain future. Finding a job, a place to stay, a point from which to start — it was hard. It still is hard. But he’s trying his best.
Kings Cove has a handful of restaurants, some convenience stores, a gym, a few bars, a drive-in, a normal cinema and a bowling alley. It’s really nothing spectacular and yet it seems there’s more and more tourist making it their temporary home in the months between May and September. It started about 5 years ago, that the town started changing with the increase in tourism. They bulldozed the playground Billy always played at, the one closest to the beach and built a bunch of fancy-ass houses and condos and a fucking Starbucks. It pains him to see it. To watch the town he loves so much, the one that holds so much charm, turn into a sandbox for rich people to shape and turn and make it something it isn’t. Something empty and lifeless.
The good thing about those tourists though, is that they are really really rich. Absolutely filthy rich. The kind of rich where they don’t know what to do with their money so you can charge them insane prices for ordinary things.
And that’s what the locals have started doing. A scoop of ice cream used to be 30ct, now it’s a dollar. You gotta bend with the world. You gotta adapt. Surviving means changing even if it sucks ass.
When he first arrived back, Billy had no idea how to navigate this place with all its changes. He felt so god damn out of place in his own home. That’s until he reconnected with Johnny, an old friend from middle school. A kid who grew up in a home filled with anger and sadness just as Billy did. Someone who understood. Someone who understands.
Johnny had it all figured out, adapted and changed. Got Billy a job at the maintenance business he works at. Fixing rain gutters and mowing lawns and cleaning driftwood off the sections of private beach belonging to the beach houses. It’s not the greatest job in the world but it’s alright and it pays good money and sometimes Billy even gets to hang out at the houses when the rich people are out taking surf lessons or doing a wine tasting a town over or try their luck on a god damn banana boat.
Kings Cove is small and the locals know each other. They’re a community tightly bonded through their shared disdain for the change their beloved town went through and the knowledge that though they can’t change anything, they can at least make the vacationers pay big money for everything.
It’s his second summer now and most of the families whose houses he tends to he’s already familiar with. You don’t forget the people who tip you 50 bucks each time. On Mondays, Billy cares for the Millers’ backyard. On Wednesday he makes sure the Callaghans’ pool is clean and still stinks of way too much chlorine. On Thursdays, it’s the Franklins’ estate that needs tending to. And weekends? Those are off.
Weekends mean he gets to enjoy the California summer himself. He goes out to the beach just after sunrise, to catch a few waves or just hang out in the ocean and let it wash away the stress resting on his shoulders from a whole week of hard work. Later, much later, when the sun is about to set, the real fun begins. There’s a bonfire almost every week. No one is ever quite sure who starts it and no official invitations are ever spoken though everyone knows and sure enough, every Saturday a crowd of young people gather by the driftwood pile and hang out and drink and dance as the bonfire crackles on.
It’s not just locals either. There’s always a few stray tourists there. Billy isn’t really all that interested in getting to know them. This is just a blip on their radar. A temporary adventure. But to him this place is home and he’s so fucking tired of these rich kids coming around and acting like they own the place. He’s the first to admit though, that the girls are quite hot and he doesn’t mind a little fling here and there without the fear of having them want anything permanent, knowing their time together comes with an expiry date. They can be quite fun and they’re so willing to let themselves fall into an intimate adventure with a local.
There’s no chase, no effort from him. The only annoying thing is they usually don’t grasp the idea of a summer fling and get clingy to the point where it becomes frustrating.
It’s a bonfire like any other, when his eyes drift across the beach, filled with people mingling all clutching a bottle or a cup. Nothing feels different or spectacular or special. But maybe that’s the thing about special moments — we don’t realise they’re special until we look at them in retrospect. And then they mean everything.
His eyes meet hers across the way. There are no fireworks. His heart beats at a normal rate. Whatever the movies and the songs try to sell you, that’s not how it really happens. Your world won’t shift and there will be no hummingbirds going wild in your stomach. It’s just a glance, a flicker. A moment that seems to hold no significance at all.
Billy can tell she’s not from here. Her outfit says it all. She’s wearing a long flowy skirt and a white tank top and some denim jacket over it that looks like it probably belongs to some boy with a trust fund and a name like Kyle or Charles. In her hair, there’s a clip with a fake flower on it. She looks expensive and fancy and like a piece of work that he’s not willing to put any effort in. He bets the guy beside her, the one that keeps playing with her hair. The one in the polo shirt. That’s probably her boy. His dad owns a boat for sure and probably fucks his secretary.
And even though he pulls his eyes away, he can feel his thoughts drift back towards her. As if some magnetic force tries to keep his mind there, with her. On the way she smiles, or how the wind blows through her hair and makes them looks messy and disorderly and — hot. On how he wants to be the one making a mess of her. He wonders what she feels like, tastes like, sounds like. Even Billy can’t deny he wants her. She’s just his type though something tells him she’s different from his other flings. There’s something deeper in her eyes. A secret he wants to unravel. It’s hidden there and it’s screaming out to him and only him.
As he turns back towards her, he sees her looks straight back at him. With those eyes full of secrets and that smirk on her lips.
Maybe his heart does beat a little faster then. Though he’ll never admit it.
That night he goes to bed and dreams of her and the beach and California.
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California summers come with heat but they also come with thunderous storms. Mighty and unforgiving and rough.
Billy makes his way down the roads of Kings Cove, windshield wipers just about dealing with the heavy rainfall as it drums down onto his car window.
“ It’s the wrath of all women scorned and mistreated “ his mother used to say when he was younger and a storm washed over them. He always thought that was silly. Women aren’t thunderstorms, they’re April showers. They’re sunshine on your skin. They’re dewdrops on the lawn.
It’s so dull and gloomy he almost doesn’t see her. Only the peach coloured baseball cap makes her stand out against the grey. She’s slowly walking along the side of the road, unbothered by the downpour. Casual and relaxed as if she’s not getting soaked right this moment. There’s a Slurpee in her hand, blue raspberry.
He wants to drive past and no let himself be bothered with it. This, she, it’s not a mess he needs to get involved in. This can only end in a disaster. Rich boys don’t like you picking up their girlfriends. Rich boys also don’t like you lusting after their girlfriends. And rich boys who see you as a threat can get your ass fired real fucking quick.
And yet he pulls up to the curb and rolls down the window. “ Do you need a ride? “.
She smiles at him, the same way she did that night at the beach in the glow of the bonfire. Her lips are cherry red and for a second he wonders what they taste like. It’s like a primal desire, to taste her. To have her. God, he’s such a guy.
“ Need? No. I’d like one though.”
It’s the first time he hears her voice. It sounds so proper, so innocent. And yet there’s an edge to it. She’s all riddles and mysteries and things he wants to unpack and unravel. Something tells him all the red and the ribbons are only the outermost layer of who she really is. And wouldn’t he like to see more of her?!
“ Get in then,” he instructs with the nudge of his head. A gust of wind follows her as she opens the door and slides into the car. She smells of sunscreen and salt and artificial raspberry flavour. She smells like summer.
“ I’m Billy. “
“ I know. “
That catches him off guard. Sure he knows the locals and some of the kids whose parents he works for but that’s about it. He’s not nearly as prolific as he used to be in Hawkins. He’s a bit more mellow now if he can say so himself.
“ And you are?”
“ (Y/N). (Y/N) (Y/L/N). You tend to our beach house on Tuesdays. I saw you clean our pool the other day”.
That’s news to him. The fact that the (Y/L/N)s have a daughter. He thought it was only her parents alone in that big house in some attempt to rekindle the fire of their marriage. Last year it was only them two, he could swear.
“ Is that so? I could’ve sworn it was just your parents in that house. “
“ Was just them last year, I was in New York City last summer. This time they decided to bring me. Let me enjoy the California sun. “
“ So you enjoying it? “
“ Verdict is still out but I quite like the view yeah. “
The teasing edge in her voice does not get lost on him. If Billy Hargrove is good at one thing, it’s realising when a girl is flirting with him.
“ You watching me then? What does your little boyfriend think about that, huh?”
“ Boyfriend? “ she sounds almost offended at those words, spits it with a certain malice that takes Billy by surprise. “ You mean Dawson? “
Dawson. Of course, that’s his name. Fucking Dawson. Dawson with the swoopy hair and the polo shirt. Dawson with the trust fund. Dawson with the DUI and the state attorney dad. Dawson with the scholarship.
“ Dunno his name.”
“ He’s not my boyfriend. He’s a friend that’s a boy that thinks if he waves around his money I’ll spread my legs for him. As if I don’t have my own money. It’s so unsexy it makes my pussy dry as the Serengeti.”
Billy has to stop himself from pushing the brakes too hard. It’s not something he has expected her to say. Not this outright at least. Something about her brashness and her honesty is truly charming though. It’s endearing for sure.
“ Wearing his jacket though, poor guy thinks he’ll score soon enough.”
“ Eh. Maybe I’ll let him. I’m getting a bit bored. If nothing better comes along— “ she says it casually and shrugs her shoulders but Billy swears there’s an open end to that sentence. Almost like an invitation.
“ Hope pretty boy does it for you then. So — where to? “
She faces him, peach baseball cap on her head and cherry smile on her lips. “ See, the thing is that my parents aren’t home right now and I don’t have a key so … “
“ So...? “
“ Just wanna hang somewhere until they get home tonight. Maybe somewhere dry? “
Everything in him screams at him not to do it. Not to get tangled up in this. He knows, god he knows, this is a bad idea and yet he says it anyway.
“ Do you wanna chill at my place? “
She bites her lips then takes another sip from her Slurpee. “ Yeah, sounds good to me.”
God Billy, you are such a dumbass.
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Billy’s apartment is small but he feels more at home here than he ever did in any house he shared with his father.
There’s an open kitchen/living room area, a bathroom and his bedroom. It’s not much but it’s his and that makes all the difference.
“ Well uh — this is my place. “
He almost expects to see some kind of disdain on her face, disappointment too maybe. She’s used to big fancy houses with white shutters and stucco ceilings. Though when he turns to look at her there’s none of it. Just curiosity. No judgment. Not even a tiny spark. Not even at all.
“ It’s nice. Do you uh — I’m soaked. Do you have a shirt or something you could give me?”
It’s now, that he lets his eyes travel down her body, and notices her shirt clinging to her body. She’s not wearing a bra and it’s painfully obvious and he swears he dies in that moment. There’s only so much a guy’s heart can take.
“ Uh. I — mmh.”
As if his body works on autopilot, Billy hurries towards his bedroom and rummages through his closet until he finds a shirt that’s even baggy on him and will surely work for her. God, seeing her in his clothes is gonna give him another little heart attack.
“ Here you g — “ she’s naked. Not completely but her shirt and jeans are gone and all she’s in is a pair of red underwear and no bra and some socks and that damn peach baseball hat.
“ Huh? you never seen a pair of tits before? “
“ No, I have. “
“ Good. “
“ Yeah. Here “
She smirks as Billy hands her the shirt, doesn’t break eye contact. Not even once and she slips if over her head and almost drowns in the fabric. It reaches down to mid-thigh and she looks glorious. Wet hair clinging to her skin, shirt covering everything but just barely. Bily is usually suave and charming and smooth. Why not now? Why not with her? What is it about this girl that she plays his games better than he does it himself.
“ You want something to eat? “
What the fuck, Billy. There’s a half-naked girl in your kitchen and you’re asking her if she wants food? What is going on?!
“ Sure, what’ve you got? “
“ Lemme see — “ Billy says and turns towards the kitchen cabinets and (Y/N) slides up and sits down on the island. Her ass must be flush on the counter and Billy has to stop himself from following that thought any further because that would result in a serious hard-on right now.
“ So I got some Nachos aaand — “ he says and squats down to open a lower cabinet, “ I think there’s guacamole somewh— “
A soft thump interrupts him and, as he realises what’s caused the sound, his heart drops straight down into his pants and his whole body goes hot. Like his entire system is going haywire.
His hand reaches out to take the flimsy red fabric into his hand. Her underwear. This has crossed flirting long ago. This is an obvious invitation and if this was any other girl or any other situation he’d already be balls deep inside her so why not now?
As Billy turns to look at her, the teasing smirk is back, her eyebrow is raised in a way that tells him she’s challenging his next move, and the secrets are back sparkling in her eyes.
“ Oops “ she says though he can tell she’s all but sorry.
“ What are you doing? You have a boyfriend. “
“ Uuuugh ”  (Y/N) moans in annoyance, “ I told you, he’s not my boyfriend. He’s just a boy who doesn’t get it. I have a lot of boys in a lot of cities who all do not get it. They think because they’re rich and their parents have influence, everyone has to do as they wish. They’re not used to not getting what they want and I like to see ‘em get pissy once they realise they can’t have me. Billy those guys — they are so boring. So dull and if I have to listen to one more lecture about politics or their scholarship or how their daddy helped finance the university’s library I am going to off myself. “
“ So what role do I play in this game? You’re just a rich girl who’s bored with her suitors then, huh? What am I ? “
“ Exciting. You are different. You are you, no ifs or buts. You are your own person not a clone of your wealthy father and his even wealthier father. You are exciting and so. fucking. hot. “
Billy doesn’t notice it happening but suddenly he’s so close he can feel her breath on his skin. She’ so close. So close. All he has to do is reach out and grab her. Touch her. Kiss her. Taste her.
“ Fuck me.”
“ You sure? “ he murmurs, voice low and deep and soothing. “That’s all this is gonna be. Sex and fun and nothing serious. “
“ Just fun. No strings. I’ll leave at the end of the summer anyway. Until then we can — explore. “
“ Explore? “
“ Mmh. There’s so much we can do.“
“ Sounds good to me. “
Billy doesn’t give her time to reply before his lips descend on hers. She doesn’t taste like cherries or chapstick or sugar. She tastes cold and like fake raspberry slushy. Billy thinks it’s his favourite flavour now.
His hands wander up and down her sides and hers get tangled in his curls, combing through his hair and tugging slightly. She’s breathing deep, quick breaths as his lips make their way across her neck and down towards her boobs. He bunches the shirt up and pulls it over her head leaving her naked on his kitchen counter. She’s absolutely fucking breathtaking and his jeans are getting awfully tight around the front.
“ You’re so hot “ he murmurs against her skin as he buries his head in the crook of her neck. Her skin is flushed and there’s a cute red tint to her cheeks. Maybe he was wrong about it on all accounts. Maybe she’s not as innocent as he has first thought.
Her fingers slip down his body and straight into the front of his jeans, grabbing his dick and squeezing his hard on softly. Yeah, she’s definitely not as innocent as he had first thought.
It’s a clash of teeth and a tongues and a lot of saliva. This is messy and raw and rough and he feels like he’s died and gone straight to heaven. With every second, his lips wander a little further down her hot skin, placing kisses one every inch he can reach until he’s kneeling in front of her. Her eyes lock on his as she spreads her legs further letting him see just what he’s been lusting after since the first moment he’s laid eyes on her. He feels like a man starving being presented with an all you can eat buffet.
Their eyes lock as his lips kiss the spot where her abdomen meet her thighs. It’s not where she wants him but it’s enough to make her go fuzzy in the head.
“ I’ll make you forget about all those rich fuckboys, baby.”
And he does. God, he does. As soon as he licks at her clit she can’t recall a single name of any other boy she’s ever met. He devours her like he was born to do nothing but eat a girl out. There’s kisses followed by kitten licks followed by more kisses. It’s driving her crazy, the way he flicks his tongue.
(Y/N) lifts her leg to rest on his shoulder as her hand reaches down burying herself in his hair. The way she tugs, the slight pangs of pain, it’s delicious. Billy can’t get enough of it. He adds a finger, then two, slowly in and out, the faster, then even faster. He knows she’s close by the way she throws her head back, bites her lips. Her lipstick is everywhere, her hair clings to her skin now from sweat instead of rain. She’s a mess and he’s so proud of getting her to this point. He further spreads her lips, lapping up the wetness, sucking at her clit, making her come undone right there on his kitchen counter.
The moans that fall off of her lips are almost pornographic, he wonders if her parents know the kind of activities she gets up to when they’re away. He bets they don’t. She’s a princess at home. Nice and proper. A princess who spends her free time getting fucked by their poolboy.
Billy pulls away at the last minute which (Y/N) really doesn’t enjoy. She pouts at him, gives him a sound of pure dismay. “ Why did you stop? “ she questions, voice breathy, almost incoherent.
“ Cause I wanna feel you cum when I fuck you. “
He’s not usually this bold and brash. Girls like lovely words. They like soft voices and hushed whispers and for boys to say nice things during sex. Not her. She wants the dirt and the mess and the honesty.
(Y/N)’s hand finds its way back to his crotch, pulling down the zipper of his jeans and freeing his solid boner.
“ No boxers? “ there’s a glimmer of mischief playing in her eyes.
“ You complaining? “
“ Fuck no. I’d suck you off but I want you inside me — like right now. “
Billy only nods, before fumbling a condom from his wallet and pulling it down his cock. He shares her sentiment. All he wants to be right now, is inside her.
Rough hands grab her hips and turn her around before pushing her down. Her boobs as flush against the counter, ass on full display. She’s a sight for sore eyes. A masterpiece.
Billy can’t keep his hands off her ass. He has to grab a handful, squeeze it, caress it. There’s boob guys and butt guys and then there are guys like Billy who know that both those features are mutually phenomenal and to limit yourself by choosing one or the other is a move only a fool would make and he ain’t no fool.
Billy lines himself up at her slit. He can’t wait to feel her around him, wet and warm and throbbing and —
“ What are you waiting for? “ she grunts, impatience clear in her voice and she tries to wiggle her ass closer to him.
“ Patience, baby.” Billy instructs as he grabs onto her hips and pulls her even closer. Her skin is so soft, so perfect. There’s a primal desire in leaving his marks of passion there so he leans over and places little love bites on her shoulder. They’ll be easy for her to cover up with a shirt but he’ll know they are there and that’s all that matters to him.
Slowly, painfully slowly, he trails his erection up and down her entrance, coating it in her arousal. He’s really not looking forward to clean this mess later on but right now it’s damn worth it by the way she’s trembling and wiggling underneath him, desperate for some stimulation.
“ Patience is not a word I know, sorry “ she’s so god damn desperate it almost makes him cum before he even gets a fuck in.
“ Yeah me neither. “
With those words he sinks into her and it feels heavenly. Engulfed by her warmth, her wetness, her passion. Quite frankly, he’s convinced, there’s no better place to be in the entire world, than buried in the pussy of a pretty girl.
Billy moves his hips slowly, deliberately, set a rhythm and a pace. He watches his cock disappear inside of her then slide back out in a delicious cadency as he dings his fingers into her hips, surely leaving bruises.
The moans tumbling from her lips are almost pornographic though he can tell they’re real and honest. There’s no reason for her to fake anything. He’s pretty sure she’d set him straight if he was doing something wrong.
“ more. “ she gasps, breath hitching as she pushes back against him, taking him even deeper. This girl is a dream if he’s ever seen one.
Billy speeds up his movements, slamming into her at a faster pace, pounding her against the counter. The air is hot and both of them are so sweaty and the room smells of sex and salty ocean air. God, he loves California summers and pretty girls.
There’s a fire lit in his lower abdomen as she whimpers and arches her back off of the counter. Billy lifts one hand off of her hips and grabs onto her front, caressing her soft tits and pulling her upright so her back is flush against his chest. The sheen of sweat covering them makes it hard to figure out where one of them ends and the other begins. Right then, they are one. Her peach colored baseball cap falls off of her head and onto the floor, where the rest of their clothes lie discarded.
His hand desperately moves across her chest, squeezing and teasing and trailing fingers around her nipples, hard from arousal.
“ Oh fuck yes. “
The confirmation that he’s doing something right, that he’s making her feel good, makes Billy’s ego grow 3 sizes. He’s such a sucker for validation.
He snaps his hips faster, harder, tries to go deeper. His hand grabs onto her thigh and lifts it up so her knee is resting on the counter letting him fuck her at a whole new angle.
At the way she cries out in ecstasy he knows he’S doing something extremely right. “God, right there. “ she almost sobs. Billy’s sure she’s biting her lip so hard it must be close to drawing blood.
Billy buries his head in her messy hair, softly traces kisses and love bites up and down her neck, tugs on her earlobe with his teeth. “ Yeah? Your pussy is a dream, baby. A fucking dream.” he grunts, voice laced with lust.
“ I’m gonna cum, Billy. “
He can tell, by the way she trembles, clenches around him. By the way her breathing hitches. And he’s right there with her.
There’s a fire pulsing through him, shockwaves rippling. It bubbles in his abdomen then boils over. With every snap of his hips the movements get more arrhythmic, messy, uncoordinated, desperate
A bunch of expletives fall from her lips but Billy can hardly make them out as his own orgasm washes over him. It feels like time slows and every sound disappeared into a white static. Nothing matters then but to chase that high and catch it and get some sweet release.
Billy feels her cum around him, squeezing him tightly in the process. The way she moans his name, as if it’s both a secret and a confession to himself and the world, that’s what does it for him.
Grabbing her hips with both hands, he holds her in place, before pounding into her with a few last uncoordinated hard thrusts. And then his vision goes black for a moment and his brain stops functioning as he cums into the condom.
For a moment there’s no sound but them trying to catch their breath as they slump down against the counter, spent from the activities. Sweaty, filthy, messy. But oh so satisfied and content.
Billy pulls out of her and for a second he misses her warm and tight around him. Like he was meant to stay there forever. Fuck, he’s such a guy.
Another heartbeat passes and (Y/N) lets out a melodic but breathless giggle. “ I could go for some Nachos and Guac right now. “
This girl is really something else.
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They devour the snacks while lazing on his couch. Naked as they came to this earth, unbothered. Maybe this is what makes him go so absolutely feral about her, the fact that she’s so uncomplicated. Yeah she comes with all kinds of warning signs and bad news for him but being with her like this it’s so easy. Like they’ve been some kinds of friends for a long time.
Their bodies are always touching in one way or another. As if they can’t get enough. Billy’s sitting on the couch, feet resting on the coffee table while her legs are places on his lap, cigarette dangling from her fingers. The air is sticky and humid and even the late afternoon breeze doesn’t bring any cooling-off.
As his eyes fall onto the clock on the wall, Billy lets out a frustrated grunt. “ Fuck.”
“ What’s the matter?”
“ I’m supposed to meet my friend Johnny at the gym in about 10 minutes. Totally forgot about it. “
“ Do you have to go? “
“ I really should. “
“ You’ve had quite the workout today though. “
Billy scoffs a laugh at her words before plucking the cigarette from her fingers and taking a drag. He lets the smoke sit in his chest for a moment, hoping to capture even a bit of the warmth he felt when buried balls deep inside her cunt.
It doesn’t work.
“ He’s waiting for me. “
“ Aw, that’s too bad. “ she says grabs the cigarette back and, after one last drag, then stubs it out in the ashtray resting on the coffee table. “ I was just about to ask for a round two. Guess I’ll have to do it by myself then. That’s fine. “
Her fingers trail down her body, teasing her nipples before descending towards her slit. She slowly circles her clit. Billy is honesty sure she’ll be the death of him. This girl is so sweet yet so dirty and he’s not sure he’s ever met someone like her.
“ You gonna sit there and finger yourself on my couch ? “
“ You gonna sit there and watch and not join in? Come on Billy, I can give you quite the workout. No gym necessary. Do I have to beg? “
Yes. God he wants to hear her beg but that makes him feel a bit — uneasy. He doesn’t want her to think he doesn’t want this just as much as she does. Maybe they can leave the begging for another day.
“ You’re insatiable, huh? “ he asks as he settles himself on top of her, lips colliding with hers ina fiery kiss.
(Y/N) just nods, a satisfied moan slipping from her lips as his fingers nudge her hand away and replace them softly trailing up and down her slit, slipping inside every once in a while.
“ What can I say? It’s a bad habit I just can’t seem to quit.”
Maybe this is a really bad idea. Maybe he’s getting himself into more trouble than he needs right now. But the way she feels and sounds and taste make it worth it.
As the sun sets upon the horizon and the summer storm has long passed on to another coastal town, Billy thinks that it’s so worth it if only he can feel like this for the rest of the summer.
There’s really nothing quite like a California summer and a pretty girl with a dirty mind.
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namgee · 4 years ago
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where there are no notes (2/2) | jjk
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❥ pairing: jungkook x reader ❥ genre: angst, fluff, fantasy (ish, probably very little ) ❥ summary: In a society where unsung notes meant the inevitable demise of one’s life, you spent the entirety of your own surviving on small snippets of sounds, whispered careful so to only be heard by your own ears. Never could you have imagined the magnitude your shy voice would take in the ears of the town’s curious prodigy. For Jungkook, there is hope but can he manage to bring out your unsung notes? ❥ word count: 2.6 k ❥ warnings:  mentions of death, alluding to violence ❥ author’s note: okay this is the 2nd and last part of this little cute idea of mine, not really edited so sorry if there’s any mistakes ;(( I hope you like it uwu 🥺 
part 1
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You live by the sea, tranquil waters surround you, each morning breeze enough to somewhat calm the ravaging waves of your ongoing distress. Your parents and your siblings— who had been plagued by hope that if they were themselves and continuously seeked to educate the public about your defiance things would get better— had faced inevitable death. The town of Salia had sung its aggressive notes, it doesn’t want you here.
You had managed to stay alive, hidden and quiet, stumbling over seas of books: books meant to give you some clue as to how you could finally let the trenched chords in your neck sing out something, anything. But anytime you attempted to bring a melodic nature to your voice, all around you wilted, the exact opposite effect of what singing is supposed to do in Salia. So even if his question had been posed with good intentions, you can’t help but find it as protruding as the handcuffs that dug into wrists during your time in the cell, as suffocating and life-threatening as the muzzle that left deep marks on your damp cheeks. You respond like you always do, with silence.
The soft grazing of his knuckles against your door makes your shoulders tense.
“Can you please let me in?” You turn your head, ear against the cool wooden surface. It’s dead quiet after his question. Maybe he left?
Your heavy feet push against the slippery floor, your jacket’s rustling sounds echo against the vastly empty space. The peephole on the door is staring at you. As much as you don’t like to admit it. You’re intrigued. This is the most interaction you’ve had in your life with someone outside of your family. Unlike other times, this is going surprisingly better. But curiosity killed the cat, or so they say. Though the man you saw outside in your garden, surrounded by a soft glow, didn’t seem capable of killing a cat.
You walk closer, lift your heels and lay curious eyes upon the broad frame of your visitor. He looks younger now that you can see him clearly. His soft hair tingles above his shoulder. You surprise yourself when you crack a small smile. Out of where? You don't know. But the way he chews at the inside of his cheeks, soft lips pouting side to side as big brown eyes dance across the door frame is as endearing as observing a baby in its own little world. The door frame shakes when you catch his gaze through the peephole and the amused smile on plush lips would have made you slam the door down to see it more clearly if not for the sound of his voice.
“Hmm, mkay.” His palm slides against the chunk of material separating the two of you. “I’m going to sit down, right here and tell you a story. After I’m done, only then, can you decide if you want to let me in or not, okay?”
Your head moves up and down behind the door and he sighs. “Knock one time for no and two times for yes,” he adds and you remain motionless. “So~?”
One. Two.
“Okay, great!” His cheery voice warms up the mood, and you can’t help thinking that this man gets excited about the most random things.
“Alright, I’ll try to keep it short and simple even if the subject is everything but that. Sorry in advance, I’ll probably bring up bad memories… well those you can actually remember that is.”
Your ear collides with the door the second he stops speaking and somehow it manages to press itself even closer to the slick oiled surface when the slight vibrations of his chest travels through the door along with the delightful clang of his chuckle. You suddenly feel the urge to slap some sanity back into yourself. You know to be wary of everyone but he just makes it so easy to let your guard down. And maybe you should, just this once. To allow yourself to believe that for once someone simply wants to talk with you, just to talk, no other end motive in sight.
“Don’t worry I am not going anywhere.” You hear the sound of liquid, followed by a loud ‘ah’, “Hope you don’t mind, I just took a swig from your bottle. I don’t really like talking about it but you’re technically the only one I can talk to about this so just need some liquid courage I guess.”
Your hands travel to your lips. It’s a childish realisation yet it makes your heart flutter. “Hmmm, cheesecake?” He smacks his lips, “With… uhhhh, caramel?” He realises your refusal to answer. “What’s the occasion?”
What he’s exactly trying to get to by asking you these questions is beyond you. Maybe it’s an icebreaker or just a way to ease you into everything? You’re not really sure, after all you haven't talked to enough people to cultivate a good understanding of social communication. All you know is that you don’t mind the tangent.
“You don’t talk much do you?”
You can’t see his face but for some reason you can feel his gaze facing the door, boring a hole through the wood and making you shy away.
One knock. Two knocks.
“Maybe we can change that.”
If there’s one thing you don’t like about this man so far is his positive outlook. The last thing you need is someone to make you dream again, to increase your expectations on the real world. He makes you scared, not of him but the power his voice carries. Everything just sounds… good, plausible. His voice, all innocent and sweet, makes words and questions that scare you to the core seem somehow less threatening. Weirdly enough for someone you’ve never met before, he makes you want to try at life, just one last time.
“We?” You unconsciously huff.
You hear quick scrambling on the other side of the barrier. Either your huff was loud or just like you, he had his ear plastered to the door.
“WOAH~! Did you just speak?!”
You didn’t speak, your thought just slipped past your lips. It wasn’t intentional, yet his excitement has the surface of your cheeks tingling with warmth. Nobody has ever been this thrilled to hear your voice. Whether his behaviour is a calculated attack on you, you can’t know, in fact you don’t want to think about it.
Just this once you let yourself dream. Dream that there's a stranger, a very cute one, on the other side of your door entertaining you. You might not know why, but it doesn’t matter because it all feels too good. It feels good to be heard, to be talked to, to want to talk with someone. You can’t remember the last time you felt like this. Have you ever felt this?
Your side of the door overflows with giggles. The ones the girls in school would give to the boys with the best voices. For once, you’re just like them. Just like you’ve always wished.
On the other side of the door, he listens and he smiles because there’s hope and he has just heard it.
“You should speak more or at least sound more.”
One knock.
“No, you really should. You don’t sound as bad as you think.”
There it goes. Your dream world just cracked, the disappointment that you had managed to hold at bay for so many years seeps in. It was good while it lasted. Now it’s back to reality.
Two knocks.
“Hmm, fine. My words might not be able to convince you. But I know others’ who can.”
Who could he possibly know that you haven’t already searched for?
“Let me quit the chit chat and cut to the story. Ready?”
You hit the door twice.
“Do you remember the cell? The one where they took you and your family to?”
Your hands find their way to your wrists, moving to scratch the warmth on your cheeks that now feels uncomfortable, as your breath quickens. The trivial question you have been asking yourself ever since you crossed paths with the man has now become significant.
Is he here to take you back? How did he find you? Did someone report you?
“I am not here to take you, don’t worry. I’m here cause I finally think it’s time for you to move on.”
Nice thing for him to say. Except you’ve got nowhere, nothing to move on to. If you wish to remain alive, this house, battered and cold is where you will stay. Grow as old as you can and one let yourself be washed away by the ocean where you will continue to sing your 52 Hz song. A whalien destined to remain unheard.
But for now, you decide to cooperate no matter how uncomfortable you feel. So you knock your way to a yes.
“Alright. You are the one who survived out of all them cause I came to release you. My family comes from a long line of generations that protects the people of Salia who can’t sing. We have an inside organisation that works with finding people like you before the government executes them. That’s why you’re alive today.”
You shiver, vision blurring even further as your damp fingers dig deeper into your wrists. You want to scream. It hurts. You want to scream and bulldoze the door down with all the remaining strength in you and you want to punch him as hard as you can and for as long as you can hold out.
You’re overwhelmed, throat dry and tight and him silent on the other side. Yet, you clench your stomach with all your might releasing all the breaths you’ve held onto in a booming and shrieking scream.
“WHAT ABOUT MY FAMILY? MY BROTHER, MY MOM, MY DAD?” WHY DIDN’T YOU SAVE THEM?”
“They didn’t want to. My parents had already reached out to your parents about helping them. But they didn’t accept. They said they didn’t want to learn to sing. They thought too much would have to die for them to achieve something that’s not guaranteed and they didn’t want to be indebted to anyone. In short, they didn’t trust my family. Your brother overheard the conversation and even though my parents could see the hope in his eyes, he looked up to your parents too much to disagree with them. They had made their choice but you hadn’t. That’s why we only rescued you.”
Your skin is scolding hot, tears burning your skin the same way the alcohol burned your throat the previous night. Except this hurts much more. Your mind holds to every shred of anger present, but it’s all soon dissipating. You know he isn’t lying to you. You were always the only one in your family curious about finding a way for your family to escape hell. You were the only one aware that they would never accept you. At least not entirely.
Even if Salia were to welcome all of its inhabitants able singers or not, there would always be a way for people to slip disgusted glances your way, screw with your life and anything you wish for, some way or the other. Just because something is set in law does not mean people will follow it. There are always loopholes and the only ones that can take advantage of them are those higher up. One way loopholes you know people would take advantage of.
But it’s all a matter of life and death. You can’t let the thought that he should have saved them anyway go. If his family wished to proclaim themselves to be saviors then they should save all. If your parents and your brother were to wish death upon themselves after being saved, then fine. At least they could have died some place nicer, maybe by the ocean or just at home. Anything would have been better than that cell.
“Hey, are you still there?” Shoes scrape against the ground on the other side of the door as small thuds, probably from his hands, make the door jiggle.
“Hmm…”
“Okay, well what do you say?” His voice isn’t as loud as it was, the excitement barely present.
“Uhmm I don’t really know what to say….I don’t even know your name?”
“Jungkook.” His voice perks up.
“Jungkook, you just told me about something that has brought me a lot of trauma and….now out of nowhere you except me to just get over that and follow you to your family’s dumb pitiful charity organisation?”
He sighs, another thud makes the door shake. “I don’t expect you to come now. I get why you’re mad at us, but as an organisation we have a protocol, and it is by keeping to it that we manage to rescue so many. Your parents made a choice. I’m sorry it wasn’t one you agree with. But this right now, right here, it’s about you, family aside, what do you want? That’s what I am asking you.”
You know what you want and you’re sure he knows too given how many tabs he has been keeping on you (because of his job and nothing else that is).
“I’ve been coming here once in a while and I hear you sing, or at least try too. So can’t you just come and give it a real try this time?” His voice is back to normal, enthusiastic, booming and dangerously convincing.
It might not be what your heart wants but it’s what your mind tells you to do, the right thing to do. “Jungkook, just leave… please.”
You stand back up, distancing yourself from the door, walking up the stairs to your room as the consistent banging from his fists fade in the background.
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Even after your flat-out rejection Jungkook doesn’t give up. He still comes by weekly sometimes even daily, only this time he didn’t bother being silent. He wants you to know when he’s here. A couple of weeks pass by with this same routine. Coming by, walking around the estate, singing with his beautiful voice enough for the flowers in the garden to remain vibrant until his next visit, maybe that is his own way of making a symbolic gesture, who knows. Once in a while he even tries his luck by knocking on the door.
It takes him coincidently coming by while you are out for him to finally be able to corner you for long enough to see what you really wanted with his own eyes, because everything that came out of your mouth are nothing but lies.
Against your weak refusal, he brings over some people who used to be just like you, unable to sing and live normally in Salia. You could do your best to shield your wonder while only hearing him speaking about it. But seeing it for yourself and hearing it with your own two ears has you mimicking the nose scrunching smile on his face.
Just like that he saves you again.
To you being able to sing has always been the ultimate goal. Your own myth of arrival. As the days progress and one well executed tone multiplies itself to become many. As the quiet singing slowly booms harder into your and Jungkook’s eardrums, you’re brought closer to the fact, one you don’t want to unravel but the thin veil that covers it already gives away the truth. It was never only about singing.
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