#buff women so true...

[yzomiris]

Girl spent almost two years training she deserves A R M S

Live Rin reaction:

[mazu-art]

FF7 is scary for me or something

As I’ve mentioned in a previous post I really like buff women and twinks FF7 fits both criteria by its second mission.

It’s scary because essentially out the gate you have two buff as fuck twink powerhouses who can fucking snap me like a goddamn branch if they wanted too. And I’d have no fucking way to stop them. Plus they have a thing for each other. With sustenance like this who needs to eat real food.

That’s not even mentioning the actual fucking monster that I’d let push me into a wall cause he hates me pull my hair to taunt me and yell obscenities at me. But that’s a post for another day.

[eggs-love-loki]

Who on earth approved Enamorus’s design it’s so ugly 😭😭😭

[anam-mana]

It fascinates me that Alistair gets lumped in with the “Chantry Boys” in discussions about Dragon Age Archetypes because it’s just. Very untrue. But it’s an idea the text actually pushes you to connect with in a way I think is purposeful.

This guy introduces us to the lore of the Blight by asking if we want “the chantry version or the truth.” If we ask if they’re not the same thing he smirks and says with some attitude “they rarely are.”

He sums up his religious beliefs saying he’s “not especially” Andrastian, and that “believes in the Maker well enough.”

He’s actually LESS religious than Zevran, who describes himself as fully Andrastian with a regular prayer routine in optional conversation branches.

The things that people use to categorize Alistair’s supposed “Chantry Boy” boy status all have non-religious motivations.

For example, the big one, his virginity, is because 1. He’s nervous around women, which is the gender he finds most attractive 2. He’s actually the youngest Party Member, being freshly 20 years old. 3. And most importantly, he correlates sex with love and was brought up to see them as requiring the other and so feels uncomfortable having sex without what he sees as “true love.” And he just hasn’t been in love yet.

Another example would be his reaction to the Urn of Sacred Ashes. He reacts with wonder akin to Leliana where many others react with a contrasting blasee attitude. Even the Andrastian Zevran.

But you gotta read between the lines here. Zevran doesn’t hold remains as sacred. He’s an assassin. So his prophet’s body is in that urn. It’s a body. The least remarkable and most mundane, perhaps even the hardest to swallow, thing she could ever be to Zevran is a corpse. Kinda takes the wonder out of faith for an assassin if she dies and rests just like any one else.

But Alistair is fascinated, in awe. 1, probably because the Chantry he doubts so much now has some kinda proof that something they said was true, unlike what he previously believed. 2, Alistair is WAY more patriotic than he is religious and we gotta remember that the Fereldans pride themselves on Alamari heritage, and Andraste was probably the most powerful and influential Alamari person to ever live. 3, he’s actually a giant history buff. He info dumps history on you often, with the memorized readings of whatever question you ask. If asked about the King and Loghain before the betrayal at Ostagar, he shows respect for Loghain’s service in the War for Independance, and knowledge of his tactics. And when speaking about his time in training with the chantry as a child, he says the education was actually what he liked most. And a lot of his gifts are things like replica soldiers, Fereldan historical things, maps, (along with his interest in magical artifacts but that’s for another day.) etc. Given his patriotism and love of learning history, yeah, the Urn is a big deal to him.

I have more things I could say, but really, I just find Alistair to be one of the most misrepresented by fandom characters. His character has a TON of subtext that challenges you to look beyond what others represent him as and the low opinion he holds of himself.

The perception of him as Andrastian and devout is one pushed on him by people like Morrigan (and others to some degree) who fights Alistair more like a straw man representing society than she engages with him as himself. She sees him as a Templar even though he left the order specifically because they abused him And he fundamentally disagreed with their practices, The Harrowing specifically being what pushed him to fight to leave.

There are, textually, two ways to interpret Alistair. Through face value aesthetics and symbolism pointing to association with the Chantry and by observing other’s opinion of him. Or through actually listening to what he says and watching what he does.

And it’s just interesting to me that a lot of people get caught in the trap of what he represents aesthetically rather than who he is.

[athenamikaelson]

Klaus Mikaelson x Reader!Soulmate x Elijah Mikaelson PART 7

Word Count- 5.3k

Warnings- Swearing, stabbing, Elijah wanting to hold hands, witch trials

A/N- KLAUS NEXT CHAPTER BABIES!!!

“I don’t understand why you grown men keep dragging me into your shit,” I groan to Alaric as he parks his car. I cling to my seatbelt and regret ever answering my phone this morning. I really just have to throw my phone away at this point. 

“I don’t trust him around Jenna, Y/n. I have a bad feeling about the guy,” Ric says as he undoes his seatbelt and begins to exit the car. 

“That or are you just jealous?”

I raise an eyebrow and purse my lips at him and he leans down to stare at me with an annoyed look.

“Get out of the car Y/N.”

I watch as Ric makes his way from his side of the car to mine, but just as he’s about to open my door I press down the lock from the inside. I smirk at him as he tries to open the door but it doesn’t budge. He stares down at me annoyed and then presses his key fob unlocking the car. He tries to open the door but I mimic my actions from before and lock the car again. We continue doing this for another 2 minutes before Ric gets the better of me and throws open my door. 

“Seriously, Y/n!”

I huff and practically crawl out of the car. 

“For the record, I would rather jump in front of a train than be here,” I say matter-of-factly to Ric as we catch sight of Jenna and Elijah walking up a grass path together.

“For the record,” Ric waves at them and then turns his head towards me, “I don’t care.”

Once again I groan as we make our way towards Jenna and Elijah. I lock eyes with the latter and he sends me a warm smile. I don’t reciprocate and quickly turn my eyes towards Jenna. I can still feel Elijah’s eyes on me, as always, as we stand in front of Jenna and him.  

“Uh, Elijah, this is my friend,” Jenna, who seems to be annoyed, introduces Alaric to Elijah, “Alaric Saltzman. And you’ve already met Y/N,” Jenna turns to me and seems much more happy to see me.

Ric who can’t seem to catch a clue speaks, “Ya, I got your, uh, message about walking Elijah here through the old property lines. I thought I, uh we,” He gestures to me, “would, uh, tag along. You know us being history buffs and all. Where to next?”

An awkward silence follows for a moment before Elijah breaks it, “I’m pretty curious about the freed slave property owners. Some say, you know, the descendants of the slaves are the true keepers of American history.”

I am almost one hundred percent sure Mr. Suit and Tie has an ulterior motive but Jenna doesn’t seem to catch it as she tells him she has the stuff in her car and that she’ll go grab it. I watch as she walks away and then turn back to the two men next to me. Elijah stands about a foot's width away from me while Ric is to my right. Ric must’ve noticed Elijah’s staring as he moved himself in front of me. If you didn’t want me to be around Elijah why bring me here? Dumbass. 

I can still see Elijah from over Ric’s shoulder and the movement Ric made doesn’t seem to sit well with Elijah as a small twitch in his upper lip presents into a snarl. He drops back into a neutral look almost instantly. 

“So you’re one of those people on Elena’s list of loved ones to protect,” Elijah says to Ric. Even though Elijah is relatively shorter than Ric the aura Elijah protrudes makes up for it. Anyone could tell that even though Ric is trying to put up a macho front, he’s afraid of Elijah. 

“So is Jenna.”

Elijah smirks at Alaric and then shakes his head slightly, “You don’t have to be jealous. I don’t really pursue younger women,” Elijah’s eyes trail to mine momentarily, “Most of the time.”

Elijah turns back to Ric and they stare at each other for a moment before Elijah pats Ric on the shoulder, “It’s a joke, Ric, lighten up.” 

Ric rolls his eyes and nods. 

“Wait,” I speak and turn to Elijah, “Technically isn’t every woman younger than you? You know, since you’re like old. Really old. ”

Ric just brings a hand up to massage the tension between his eyebrows and sighs deeply, but Elijah lets out a small chuckle that sends shocks down my spine. 

“I guess you’re right Y/N. I am really old,” He mimics my tone with a small smile on his face. 

—

35 minutes. We’ve been walking in this dirty ass forest for 35 minutes. I should be in bed asleep right now. But nope, here I am following behind three adults as they talk about history. It’s not that I don’t like history, I do, it’s just that it’s a Saturday. I shouldn’t be learning things on a weekend. 

I half-heartedly listen to what Jenna is telling Elijah as we cross over a bunch of fallen tree logs. Alaric helps Jenna over one, and I don’t miss the dirty look she looks she shoots him, making me try to cover my giggle with my hand. The giggling instantly stops though when I see Elijah standing by the front of the log with his hand outstretched towards me. We haven’t talked in these 35 minutes since Jenna has been occupying him, but that hasn’t stopped him from turning back every few moments to catch a glimpse of me, as if he thinks I’m just going to disappear into thin air. Honestly, I wish I would.

I’m not going to use Elijah’s help but realize that my clumsy ass would probably fall over the log if I didn’t. So I lightly place my hand into his, which results in him closing his hand over mine. Locking our hands together. Our hands are locked for a long moment before Ric clears his throat from the other side of the log. I quickly look away from Elijah and use his hand to get over the log carefully. I soon as I get over it though I wrench my hand away from his and walk over to Jenna who sends me a warm smile. 

“Seems like someone is fond of you,” She whispers to me as she raises his eyebrows suggestively.

I can already feel the redness making its way onto my cheeks as I stare at her horrified. Jenna just laughs at my face as she starts leading us farther down the trail we’re on. Sadly though, Alaric has occupied Jenna, which leaves Elijah to walk next to me. 

Elijah’s quiet for a moment, seemingly just enjoying my company before he starts speaking, “Is it true what Alaric says,” I turn to him confused, “That you’re a history buff?”

I sigh slightly as I shrug my shoulders realizing that just talking to the guy might make this little trip go by a little faster.

“I wouldn't call myself a buff,” I use my fingers to make air quotes, “but it’s also not something I dislike. Learning about how our world was made and all the small factors of why it was made are quite intriguing. I also like weird history.”

“Weird history,” Elijah questions me with a frown.

“You know, like the unexplained, or the odd things in history that many don’t understand,” At the still confused look on his face I continue, “You know like the dancing plague of 1518, D.B Cooper, or Oh! The lost colony of Roanoke. That’s probably my most favorite.”

Once I realized that I had just gone on a tangent I went to apologize to Elijah but when I look at him all I can see on his face is pure adoration. The type of adoration that makes the beating in my chest stops. He smiles at me and from being so close to him I notice the small dimple on his left cheek. 

“I understand now,” Elijah says, “You seem to be most interested in The Roanoke Colony. Why is that?”

I ponder his question for a moment, “I’m not sure, it’s just something I’ve always been drawn to. Maybe because of how mysterious and odd it is. I’m not sure, I know that some people say it was aliens or cannibalism but there isn’t a known answer. It’s amazing to me that so many people, an entire village, can go missing and there are no clues. Other than the word Croatoan!”

Elijah nods his head along but the look in his eyes and the smirk on his face tells me he’s hiding something. Wait. Holy shit.

I whip around to him stopping us, “You know, don’t you! I mean you’re old enough but I didn’t even think you would…,” I stop and stare at him in awe for a moment, “You have to tell me.”

Elijah opens his mouth but then I shake my head and throw a hand up to his mouth stopping him, “Wait! No, what if you tell me and it ends up disappointing me.”

I go through all the possibilities in my head at what he could tell me and then fight myself on whether I should have him tell me or not. I can feel Elijah’s smile behind my hand and bring my hand back.

“Sorry,” I wince embarrassed. 

“No worries, I enjoy seeing you so full of life,” I blush at his words, “Would you like me to tell you?”

I think about Elijah’s question for a moment and then shake my head, “No. I think the reason I love that moment in history so much is because of the mystery behind it. I don’t want to lose interest in it by knowing.”

Elijah seems pleased with my answer and nods, “Very well.”

We continue walking for another moment before Elijah chimes up again, “What else interests you?”

I shrug my shoulders, “Nothing much, I’m not a very interesting person.”

“I highly doubt that.”

I smile slightly at his comment, “Well I like reading. That’s actually something Elena and I have bonded on. I used to get bullied for being a book nerd but now having someone who likes it too is comforting.”

At this mention of Elena, Elijah’s smile drops slightly but then turns into a small frown. 

“I’m sorry that you were bullied for reading, as a literature connoisseur myself I find it quite depressing how reading has become something so rare in these past decades. What types of books do you read?”

I nod along to Elijah’s words until he asks what books I read. At this, I instantly get red and look anywhere other than him.

“You know,” I try to find a socially acceptable answer. Not really wanting to tell this 1,000-year-old man I spend my free time reading smut, “Literature.”

“Literature?”

Elijah looks at me with a smirk on his handsome features and I just nod and clear my throat, “Yep, literature. Just all the literature.”

“What about you? What literature do you like?”

Elijah laughs slightly at my change in subject, “Literature in general as well,” I roll my eyes at his joke, “But also I appreciate all types, Historical, the classics, thriller, even romance.”

“You read romance,” I ask surprised. 

He nods his head, “On occasion. There’s something so unique about how different authors portray love and devotion. Where some show it as a neverending, intense emotion others show it as one’s demise.” 

“And which do you believe?”

This question has Elijah pausing momentarily, thinking, “I’ve lived a long time, Elskan. Seen people start wars in the name of love, and seen people kill and die in its name aswell. To choose just one thought when it comes to the idea of love is something I can not do. What about you, what are your thoughts on love?”

“I want nothing to do with it.”

Elijah goes quiet for a moment at my answer. I face back forward and we keep walking in silence for another moment.

“I understand your reluctance towards it. But still young why cut off something like love at your age?”

I fight the urge to roll my eyes at his words. My age has nothing to do with my hatred and distaste for love. 

“Don’t tell me all that romance you read is getting to your head, Elijah,” I say to him slightly snarky.

“I’ve struck a nerve,” Elijah says as he nods his head. 

“Nope. No nerves struck here,” I tell him picking up my speed and walking away from him. He doesn’t have to try hard to meet my speed though as he falls back into step with me. 

“Even though there have been no nerves struck,” He tries to lighten the tension with a joke, “I must apologize for overstepping. As I’ve said before, making you uncomfortable is the last thing I’d ever want to do.”

I move my gaze from Jenna’s back, who is currently in a small argument with Alaric, and turn to look at Elijah. Once again his face has no signs of malice or ill intent.

“It’s fine,” I shrug at him, “Like I said no struck nerves.”

Elijah slightly laughs and then nods his head. We walk for another 5 minutes in silence, Elijah helps me over logs and rocks whenever we come up to one. 

“Y/N and I should be heading back now,” Alaric tells the group as we get to a clearing. 

I nod, happy to be getting out of these woods.

“Well, thank you Y/N for coming today, I’m sure you had more exciting things to do today,” Jenna smiles at me and jokes.

“Just sleeping. But it was nice to see you Jenna,” I reluctantly look over to Elijah who hasn’t left my side, “You as well.”

This has Elijah’s deflated shoulders rising again. He almost reminds me of a dog that is happy someone is finally giving it an ounce of attention. 

“It was a pleasure to be able to spend this morning with you, Y/N,” I’ve noticed that Elijah calls me by my actual name when other people are around. But, when it is just him and I, he uses that stupid nickname. 

I nod as I go to follow Alaric back to the car but stop and turn back to Elijah, “I guess I’m not one-hundred percent against love,” This perks Elijah up, “I mean I totally loved the dress I wore to the tea party.”

Elijah lets out a deep chuckle that rattles his broad shoulders, “You weren’t the only one.”

I almost choke on my saliva at his words. Elijah’s smirk deepens and I put my lips together and nod my head fast.

“Well, um. I’ll be going now,” I don’t give Elijah time to respond as I speed walk past him and Jenna and grab Ric’s forearm pulling him roughly behind me.

“Keep up,” I whisper yell at him as we speed walk our way to the car. 

—

The original plan was that Ric and I would go on that stupid history walk and then after 30 minutes he would bring me back to my house, but of course, no one in this god-forsaken town follows any type of deal. So that’s why I am currently sitting in front of Demon and his “girlfriend,” and next to Ric who are talking about Elijah and how they don’t trust him. Thankfully Damon bought me fries so this whole trip hasn’t been an entire waste. I half-ass listen to their conversation but don’t really care so I don’t process a word they’re saying, at least not until Damon perks up.

I’ve come to learn from my time in knowing Demon that if I see him getting excited about something, someone is going to get hurt. 

So that’s why I follow his line of sight and see Elijah and Jenna walk into the Grill together.

“Ah, there Jenna with her new boyfriend,” Damon says. I know he’s just trying to get a reaction out of Ric but something about that sentence makes my skin crawl. 

Damon calls over both of them. Jenna welcomes all of us with a smile and wave while Elijah trails behind her looking complacent. As always his eyes find mine and his complacent smile lightens. 

“So I hear you two had a meeting of the historical minds today,” Damon speaks to the two.

“Yeah, I guess you could say that,” Jenna smiles looking up at Elijah who is now looking down at Demon. 

“Well, as much as I’d love to continue this, I, uh, I’ve got papers to grade and a teenager to get home,” Ric gets up from his seat and he gestures to me. I frown as I see my fries still half full and quickly grab a fist full and fill my mouth trying to get away with as many as possible, almost choking myself in the meantime. The adults around me watch me with a mix of amusement and slight disgust, but I don't care. I’m not wasting free food. 

“No, you know what,” Alex or Stephanie or whatever Demon’s girlfriend is named, chirps up, “We should continue this. Let’s have a dinner party!”

Hell to the no. 

“Ooh, my girl. Full of good ideas,” Damon looks over to her before turning back to us, “I’ll be happy to host. Say tonight. Maybe?”

“It’s good for me. Jenna,” Where Alessia agrees Ric tries to disagree. 

“Yeah, I’m free,” Jenna talks over Ric. Yikes. 

“Will the lovely Y/N be there,” Elijah asks me and I try to tell him, “Hell no,” but the fries in my mouth have left me mute.

“Of course, she’ll be there,” Damon exclaims as if there isn’t any other place I’d rather be. I send him a nasty glare which earns me a wink in return. 

“Then it’d be a pleasure.”

Damon’s smile is all but welcoming as he responds to Elijah, “Great.”

This is going to be a horrible night. 

—

This is a horrible night. 

First I get a nasty grade on my modern art project. Not my fault, since modern art is a crime against humanity. 

Then, I try to find a dress for this stupid dinner and the only half-decent dress that I have now is two inches too short.

And then after I said screw it, put the dress on and finished getting ready. I went down to my car only to find out that my front tire had gone flat. Honestly in this case I was happy about it because I had a reason to cancel, but when I called Jenna and told her the “upsetting” news, she told me she’d come pick me up. Great. 

So now I’ve been sitting on my front porch waiting for Jenna. After waiting for fifteen minutes I was close to just calling it quits and telling Jenna the fries from earlier made me throw up on myself. But, right when I stand up a dark sedan pulls into my driveway. Wait. I know that sedan. Damnit. Why the hell is Elijah here?

As if he could read my thoughts Elijah pretty much glides out of his car looking practically god-like in yet another five-thousand-dollar suit and smiles at me. 

“Good evening, Elskan,” Elijah walks up the walkway to stand before me, “Miss. Sommers so kindly asked me if I could escort you to the dinner tonight. To which I happily obliged.”

“Right,” I sigh, “Let’s just get this night over with.”

I walk to Elijah’s car as he follows me, just like before he opens the door for me. I send him an appreciative nod and get in. After another moment we’re driving down the dark road towards the boarding house. 

“You look breathtaking, Elskan,” Elijah says to me from his position in the driver’s seat. 

“Thanks,” I turn to him and look at his usual attire, “You look the same.”

He chuckles, “Yes, you always seem to remind me of my attire. Thank you for that.”

“Always here to help.”

We drive in comfortable silence for the entirety of the trip until we get to the Salvatore’s driveway.

“How are you feeling about tonight,” Elijah’s tone is flat but as he looks at me his eyes are filled with what I believe to be suspicion.

“You mean, do I think something bad is going to happen?”

Elijah’s upper lip twitches, “Aren’t you a smart one? But yes, I am not going to threaten you Elskan. I would never do that, but,” At that, I’m tensing in my seat, “I need to know if your friends are planning something, unbecoming, tonight.”

At Elijah’s serious tone, I shake my head, “I don’t know anything. Promise,” Elijah doesn’t seem to be entirely pleased with my answer, and something in me wants to fix that, “But, I do know that Damon is not one to have friendly dinner parties so,” I look at him uneased but speak in a strong voice, “Be on your guard tonight.”

“Thank you for your honesty, Elskan.”

— 

Elijah and I stand side by side as he knocks on the front door. We wait only a moment before a smirking Demon opens it up,

“Thank you both for coming,” Damon says a little too nicely, “Y/N don’t you look adorable. Come on in!”

Elijah places his hand on my lower back, “Just one moment. Can I just say that if you have less than honorable intentions about how this evening is going to proceed, I suggest you reconsider.”

“No, nothing, nothing dishonorable. Just, uh, getting to know you.”

“Hmm, well, that’s good.”

“Yeah,” I watch this back and forth waiting for something bad to happen. 

“Because, you know, although Elena and I have this deal if you so much as make a move to cross me I’ll kill you and I’ll kill everyone in this house,” And there it is, “Except Y/N and Miss. Sommers of course. Are we clear?” 

“Crystal,” Damon eyes Elijah wearily. And then Elijah leads me into the house as Jenna enters the room.

“Jenna, wonderful to see you again. How are you?”

“I’m seriously getting whiplash from you man,” I whisper so only Elijah will hear. The only response I get is a slight squeeze to my waist as he pulls me closer and away from everyone else who has entered the room to greet us. His right-hand stays resting on my upper hip. 

“Let’s eat.”

—

“I hate to break it to you, Damon,” Jenna says to Damon as she pours him a glass of wine, “But according to Elijah your family is so not a founder of this town.” 

“Hmm, do tell,” Damon responds. Damon sits at the head of the table sipping his wine as he stares at Elijah, who is currently sitting next to me on my right. Alaric sits to my left and Jenna and Abby sit across from us. I should really learn her name. There’s also this balding white man who is sitting across from Damon at the other end of the table but no one here seems to want him here.

“Well, as I mentioned to Jenna earlier a faction of settlers migrated from Salem after the witch trial in the 1690s. Over the next hundred years, they developed this community where they could feel safe from persecution.”

“Hmm, because they were witches,” Jenna chimes in.

“Yeah, there’s no tangible proof there were witches in Salem.”

“Andies a journalist. Big on facts,” Oh, so that’s her name. I liked Andrea more.

“Well,” Elijah sets down his fork and starts talking again, “the lore says that there was this wave of anti-witch hysteria. It broke out in the neighboring settlement. So these witches were rounded up. They were tied to stakes in a field together and, uh, burned,” Elijah says as if it’s something anyone wants to hear while they’re eating steak dinner, “Some say you could hear the screams from miles around us. They were consumed by the fire. Could you pass the,” He gestures to the salt and Ric passes it to him wearily. 

“I wouldn’t repeat this to the Historical Society,” Jenna says which has me wanting to roll my eyes at the mention of those bags.

“Maybe you should,” I say to myself but have seemed to catch the attention of the table. Shit.

“I’m just saying it would knock them down a peg, which is clearly needed,” I whisper out the last part, “Even though there is no proof of witches being burned at the stake during the trials. It was mostly done from self-drownings and using rocks.”

At my contradiction to Elijah’s statement he raises an eyebrow, “Is that so?”

“Self-drowning and rocks? How would that work,” Jenna questions with a slight stutter clearly having had a little too much wine.

“Well with the drowning it was more of a test,” I use fingerquotes at the word, “So to speak. The witch in question would be tossed into a body of water and if she was able to stay afloat she was condemned as a witch and was killed. But if she didn’t float, well. Y’know. So I mean either way it was just a way to punish women for being women. They used the rocks though to stone the people to death. Interestingly enough one of my ancestors was actually killed that way. R.I.P.”

I laugh at my little joke at the end which has earned me a few stares from the people at the table.

“Ok, moving past whatever that was,” Damon says as he turns back to Elijah, “So why do you want to know the location of these alleged massacres?”

Elijah thinks for a moment before smiling, “You know… a healthy historian’s curiosity, of course.”

“Of course,” Damon replies to Elijah who has already gone back to taking a bite out of his steak. I bring my glass of water to my lips and take a sip but start choking on it when I feel a hand gently grab my other one from under the table. 

“Y/N! Are you ok,” Jenna exclaims from her side of the table as Ric pats me on the back, I put up a thumbs up and try to smile.

“Yep all good. Just,” I cough out a bit more, “went down the wrong pipe. Don’t mind me.”

Even though I almost choked, Elijah still hasn’t moved his hand from mine. Instead, his fingers have begun tracing shapes into my skin. I know I should feel disgusted, but I can’t seem to want to move his hand away. He looks at me momentarily as if to check I’m ok. To which I send him a small nod. This in return makes him smile and grab a hold of my hand more firmly now.

Damon's standing distracts me momentarily, “Does anyone care for some cognac? I have a bottle I’ve been saving for ages.”

God, me, please.

“None for me, thanks. Nine bottles of wine is my limit,” Alaric says as he downs yet another glass of wine. Jesus dude, try water sometime. 

This has everyone standing from the table. Ok then, guess I’m done eating. 

“The gentleman should take their drinks in the study,” Anna says. 

“How 1950s of you Alice,” I smile at her sarcastically.

“My name is Andie,” She says back.

“Is that not what I said,” I smile at her as I walk past her into the study. I don’t even want to go in here with them but I’m doing it to stand on principle. And that I’m kind of an asshole. But that’s not my fault since I was awoken this morning before I was able to get my full 13 hours of shut eye.

—

My fingers graze the dozens of books I walk by as Damon and Elijah converse behind me. It surprises me that Damon has so many books, when he’s so dumb. Weird. 

“Are these Stefan’s?”

Damon spares me a moment's glance, “No, they’re mine.”

I hum. Weird. Maybe he just doesn’t have comprehension skills.

“So, let me guess, in the addition to the moonstone, the doppelganger, the lion, the witch, and the wardrobe… You need to find this witch burial ground.”

“Because I feel as though we’ve grown so close, Damon,” Elijah’s words have me chuckling as I flip through a book that seems to be at least one hundred years old, “I’ll tell you yes. Do you know where it is?”

“Maybe,” Damon’s answer has Elijah walking over to him, “Tell me why it’s so important.”

“We’re not that close.”

Damon getting rejected has me snorting which catches Elijah’s attention as he smiles up to me. He notices the book I have in my hands and speaks again to Damon.

“It’s quite a collection you have here. It is a funny thing about books. Before they existed people actually had memories.”

I go to make a snarky comment at Elijah’s words but Ric comes storming into the study. 

“Gentlemen,” I clear my throat and Ric looks at me, “And Y/N. We forgot about dessert.”

Addison comes over to Elijah and raises a hand for him to take, which has a nasty feeling starting in my gut. But before it goes too far Elijah turns to me instead and reaches out his own hand, “Y/N.”

I have to fight back a snort as we walk by Amelia Bedelia as Elijah leads me into the dining room where Jenna is.  

“Sorry, guys, dessert is taking longer than I thought,” Jenna’s words have me physically deflating, “I usually just unwrap food.”

Elijah leads me to a chair and moves it so I can sit down. He sits next to me and Audrey sits across from us. 

“So, I know this is a social thing but I, I would really love to ask you some more questions about the work that you’re doing here,” She asks Elijah who agrees. I’m quite interested in what he’s going to say since he’s created this big lie surrounding, Elijah Smith.

“Great,” She continues as Damon enters the room, “Oh, that’s so great. Ric, would you do me a favor and grab the notebook out of my bag?”

She instructs Ric as Elijah’s hand finds its way back to my hand.

“Elijah, did John tell you that he’s Elena’s uncle/father?’’

Damon’s question has me sitting up right.

“Huh?!”

I look between Damon and the balding man next to me and wonder how he was able to produce a girl as pretty as Elena. Also now I’m pissed and kind of sad no one has told me this before.

“Yes, I’m well aware of that,” Even Elijah knows?!

“Of course, she hates him, so there’s absolutely no need to keep him on the endangered species list.”

Now I don’t feel bad for thinking he looked like Charlie Brown earlier. 

Adeline says something to Ric but now my full focus is on Elijah's fingers which are now grazing up and down my hand that lays on my thigh.

I can hear Dead Beat saying something to Elijah but the words won’t focus as I try to calm my breathing. Elijah’s deep voice enters my ears as I hear him threatening the two men but the soft touching hasn’t gone away. 

I’m almost comforted by the feeling now until the once soothing feeling is replaced by his hand crushing my thigh. My yells are mixed with what I’ve just now realized are Elijah’s as he crunches up in pain. A loud scream escapes my lips as I see a dagger protruding from Elijah’s back and can only watch in horror and pain as Elijah’s once soft and light skin turns to grey and veining flesh. 

I blink rapidly as everyone moves around me but all I can focus on is Elijah’s dead body. Dead. Elijah’s dead. Oh god. 

I feel someone grab my upper arm and drag me out of my seat, “What’s wrong with you?”

My breathing halts. My vision goes black and, my body hits the floor. 

[imbecominggayer]

Writing Advice: Writing Authentic Dialogue

For @radiantmocha TL;DR: advice for writing combat and improving dialogue authenticity?

I'm sorry that this post is going to be so short but it's a really simple topic for me :D

A) Authenticity: Actually Talk To These People Or Read Their Books

When it comes to looking for authentic dialogue, especially in relation to combat, just trying to start up a connection with a professional can be the gateway into actual realism.

If you can, try talking to a veteran or someone actively serving in the military!

If you are interested in a specific time in history that no one is currently alive from, try talking to either a historian or a history buff.

If neither of those options work for you, try reading books and other stories that were written by veterans. My favorite book of this genre is "All Quiet On The Western Front" which is a semi-autobiographical book exploring what life was like for german soldiers in WW1 which was written by Erich Maria Remarque, a German veteran of WW1.

I emplore you to explore stories, even fictional stories, that were written by soldiers!

B) Authenticity: Accounting For The Environment

What's the time period that the story is set?

Where is the story set?

What is the socio-economic status of the protagonist?

What is the personality of the protagonist?

Answer these questions (and more) to understand what a character will and wont say. Characters fighting in WW1 won't reference tanks pre-Battle of Somme.

This advice is true for everything. An innocent, rich kid will certainly speak differently, using different verbage, in comparison to a kid living in the slums. They will also prioritize different things.

What I hate most in stories is when characters, poor for their entire life, poverty-striken, starts wildly proclaiming ideas of justice, fairness, and equality while fighting bullies left and right. Most people in that situation need to keep their head down. They can't afford to go to the police station for "contributing to the a fight" Independent women can't get into the middle of a fight! Do you know how much medical bills cost? If they manage to survive, it's not going to be pretty. No matter how much self-defense classes like to tell women, most women understand that they can't overpower a determined man.

That isn't evil, that's survival, that's practicality! Ideals have always been prioritized by people privileged enough to have the time to think while the poor and always working need to be always working!

Sorry, that was a rant

In Conclusion:

Read stories that real people have written that are either semi-autobiographical or autobiographical! Keep in mind the time and place!

And so sorry for that rant!

[uvonobu]

I swear I’m not crazy but Togashi has rlly been pandering to the lesbians in the succession arc with all these gorgeous women and I am HERE for it

If Shizuku is for the “male gaze” then these women are for the female gaze. Especially with true form Bisky and Longhi. Like. Hello. Sir. You knew what you were doing putting Bisky in that outfit… only gay women can truly appreciate the beauty of a gorgeous buff woman wearing a tight fitted jacket she’s so mmm

AND U CANT EVEN SAY IM REACHING. LOOK AT THE GAY ASS SHIT THAT’S BEEN HAPPENING IN THE SUCCESSION ARC. WE LITERALLY SAW TWO WOMEN MAKE OUT ON SCREEN

Togashi is feeding the gays so well he knows his audience love him for that <3

[henry-fox-biggest-stan]

I have been thinking about how come than there is nothing than shows mike’s attraction to women.

“Oh but, he’s dating El!” True, but what I mean is than all the other heterosexual characters (you can have all the headcanons you want, but they have been shown over and over to be attracted to the opposite gender) all have moments than show their attraction to men / women, aside from their romantic partners.

We have Max dating Lucas, yes, but she also, for example, looks at a shirtless Steve with binoculars. She is a teenage girl attracted to men, and it makes sense she wants to see this older guy shirtless. She also talks about how Ralph Macchio from karate kid is “so hot”

We have Lucas dating Max, but in s2 while playing at the arcade, Lucas mentioned how princess daphne was still his, a female character who, tbh, is kinda sexualized and mostly serves as eye candy. The typical “hero needs to save princess” trope. A preteen / teenage boy attracted to women would find her attractive

We have Dustin dating Suzie, but he also had a tiny crush, or at least, interest on max at the start of s2. He asked a girl to dance at snowball, he talks with Steve about girls, etc.

We have Steve who is just constantly reminding us of his attraction to women, he dated nancy, he talks about girls, he mentions liking boobs, etc

We have Nancy dating Jonathan, and she dated Steve before, but she also has a Tom Cruise poster in her room, who was very popular among girls during the 80s, and the first time we see her in s1 ep 1 she’s talking to Barb over the phone saying things like “yeah he’s cute” about a boy, probably Steve.

But with Mike, the opposite happens, he’s dating El, sure, but he shows rejection to the opposite gender. He doesn’t care about Max at the start of s2, he doesn’t seem interested in princess daphne, and then there’s the lingerie scene paralleling the sauna scene in s3. Lucas (attracted to women) is the first to enter the lingerie store. And Mike (attracted to men) is the first to open the sauna (full of men). (This is not me saying mike was attracted to those men, he wasn’t, but having him have the idea and open the door is interesting)

Same with Will, except he’s canonically gay now. A girl wanted to dance with him at snowball and he reluctantly said yes, but he didn’t seem too focused on her, a girl is interested in him in California, and still, he doesn’t care. He welcomed max in s2, but in a completely different way than Dustin and Lucas did.

Hell, even Robin has scenes showing her attraction for women. She mentions a crush on Tammy and the next season a crush on Vickie, but she also talks about how Julie Christy is “bonkers hot” in doctor zhivago, or how “these ladies are hot, they’re so very hot”.

Instead what does Mike have? Posters of buff, shirtless (male) dragons on his walls

Basically: Mike’s attraction to women is just like my attraction to men, nonexistent.

[phoebejaysims]

Bubble Bath Runs Out Mod - Update

It was due time I added some more scents to the Bubble Bath runs out mod! So here are three more to add to your collection!

New Bubble Bath Types:

3-in-1 Shower Gel (if kUseInShower tuning is true, this will only be used for showering, not for bubble baths)

Deep Metal

Tea Tree

Features:

3-in-1:

Has a chance of removing the 'stylin' buff. If my hairdresser mod is installed, it may add the 'bad hair day' buff.

Can either give a positive or negative custom buff.

Deep Metal:

Trait positive ladies may get 'dazed' or 'nauseous' buff. Otherwise they may get the 'embarrassed' or 'inspired' buff.

Men have the chance to get 'nauseous' or 'anxious to advance' buff if trait positive. On the flip side, the buff can also remove 'anxious to advance' and 'overworked ' buff. Men may also get the 'pumped' or 'oddly powerful' buff.

Gives custom positive buff.

Tea Tree:

Removes 'bad nights sleep' buff.

Has chance to make sim nauseous for trait positive sims.

Gives either positive or negative custom buff.

Has chance of getting either 'wide-awake', 'itchy', 'smooth skin' or 'adrenaline rush' buffs.

Changes:

Bottles are now designated either male, female or unisex. The only thing this does is make certain sims more likely to use certain bottles while bathing. It doesn't exclude sims from using any of the bottles.

For men: 3-in-1 Shower Gel & Deep Metal

For women: Rose

Unisex: Scent Free, Tea Tree, Lemon

Download: Simblr.cc - Bubble Baths Runs Out

If you'd like to donate to say thanks: ko-fi.com/phoebejaysims

Enjoy!

Phoebe x

[ecoterrorist-katara]

The only stereotypically masculine thing about Aang…is his romantic arc

There’s a really popular post on Tumblr called “Avatar Aang, Feminist Icon.” The thesis is basically that Aang, unlike his female teachers and friends, is actually not a badass. He listens, he defers, and he respects women. He seemed to have no problem with Katara’s crush on Jet, despite his own crush on her. He chooses love and kindness and friendship and pacifism. He’s not tall and handsome as hell or buff. He wears flower crowns!

And I agree! This is Aang for most of the series and I love those qualities (though I do think the bar is in hell if those traits make a character a feminist icon, as opposed to a person who simply sees women as human beings). Anyway, I just think there’s a glaring omission. And that’s Aang’s romantic arc in season 3.

Bryke managed to take the worst of both worlds: Aang’s romantic arc retains the male-centricity that make most romances so problematic, while retaining none of the characteristics that make problematic romances compelling to women.

Aang falls in love at first sight with a beautiful girl. For the majority of their friendship, he remains respectful and supportive. As his crush hits an all time high, however, it gets distinctly more stereotypical: he kisses Katara at the invasion, and when she didn’t want to talk about that kiss, he firebends at her (the fact that this comic is canon, and was published years after ATLA’s conclusion, only demonstrates that the creators still don’t understand critiques of their romance). Aang considers Katara “his girl” and becomes furious (“I would be in the Avatar state right now!”) when the actress version of Katara didn’t like him romantically, and then he kisses her again — this time explicitly against her wishes. Throughout the show, people reassure him that she will come around, continuously reinforcing the idea that Katara is “his” and he just has to be patient. And even though Ka/taang is supposed to be endgame, we never hear directly from Katara how she feels, even though we’re no strangers to her opinions and feelings on other topics. It’s almost like the creators wanted Katara’s feelings to be a mystery because we’re meant to resonate with Aang. That’s…a male-centric, action hero romance.

In addition, the friendship dynamics between Katara and Aang feel pretty gendered. The distribution of emotional labour between Aang and Katara is quite skewed: Katara takes care of Aang much more than he takes care of her. She’s the one responsible for calming him down from the Avatar State. She’s the one who cooks for him and performs a whole lot of domestic chores. Post-canon, Katara’s storyline revolves around Aang, and she’s treated as his accessory and the keeper of his legacy instead of her own person, to the degree that she’s not even recognizable in LOK anymore. A beautiful, badass, independent woman who dedicates her energy and intelligence to a man’s needs? Wow, that is definitely something I’ve never seen in media geared towards men!

A lot of gushing about Aang’s lack of stereotypical masculinity seems to also hinge on how Aang is not conventionally attractive, but that’s…not true. Aang may not behave like James Bond, but he has plenty of admirers. Meng and On Ji liked him even without knowing that he’s the Avatar. Post-series, Acolytes descend en masse to steal Katara’s man. And of course he grows into a tall, buff dude. Aang’s romantic arc is not about becoming attractive to women, or finding a woman who loves him despite his looks. His romantic arc is about getting the girl who’s hard to get, because she only sees him as a friend or a little brother / babysitting charge.

Bryke do not deserve the credit for creating a “feminist icon,” not when the only stereotypically masculine traits they gave him are in relation to his romance arc. It honestly feels more insidious this way, because it’s like, “see? You don’t have to be masculine to reap the benefits of performing masculinity” — the benefits being, of course, “getting” the girl you want.

[cursedcola]

You know, I really like how Yana has a different “Yuu” for each chapter in the TWST manga.

I hadn’t a moment to truly look at it until now - but I feel like the story is perfect for an alternate reality theme. The only way any Yuu would be able to ‘fix’ every problem would be if they were some kind of Mary Sue or shounen protag.

I love how each Yuu is reflective of the Dorm leaders. Of *course* the Heartslabyul chapter is going to have a strong, buff, very jock-like Yuu. That’s the complete foil of who Riddle is. Not to mention how it’s reflective of the Dorm’s rambunctiousness.

And *of course* Savanaclaw’s Yuu is a woman. Women are powerful and respected in the Sunset Savannah. Leona’s more likely to listen to a female Yuu, and most of the students in his dorm are strength-oriented that would crumble under the authority of a feminine god.

Then we have Octavinelle’s Yuu - my favorite, personally. He loves food, has a tender heart, and has a bit of chub. Now - yes he’s what Azul fears he will become but *also* I think this Yuu is reflective of Azul’s mother and her ideals. Or at least is the man she was raising Azul to be until his self-hatred began. I feel like most Octavinelle students have a flip side to them, so a Yuu that’s true to himself is perfect for this chapter.

I write my fics similar to this actually - every character has a Yuu in my mind that I think would match them. I don’t just write with one personality for Yuu in my works. Just an example, but the Yuu I place with Deuce is extremely different than the one I put with say Floyd when writing. Both physically and personality wise. It gets a bit wishy-washy since I have to write in 2nd person most of the time, but it’s still there when I’m formulating scenarios. Especially when I write anything that has dialog or flitters into Yuu’s thoughts. This really came out when writing the plot for my game since it’s dialog heavy.

I won’t make it because I’m already doing one game (and I want to move on after this), but there’s some good wiggle room for an alternate reality spinoff using TWST. Like once TWST finishes its main plot, there could definitely be some branching where Yuu has a bit more personality and different routes to go down depending on their chosen dorm.

[katerinaaqu]

Hi! Love your takes and all! What do you think of people talking about Penelope being all buff and strong physically as she was "Spartan?" or that she find Odysseus more attractive with blood plaster on his body as she is "Spartan" or such?. Is it true in the Epics? I read something about a Lykurgus or something..I just want to have a nuanced answer to that, also sorry for the silly question.

You are very kind Anon and I am glad you find them useful

Okay for starters I think this whole thing is a massive stereotype in regards to Sparta that "they are all sexually aroused by blood and violence". I mean yes Sparta as we know had an extreme military outline but it is not like they all just killed around to have fun like a twisted version of Asterix village or something. They valued war and the strength in war of course and they took pride to their warfare and all but yeah I think the whole thing of "oh gosh! Blood! Foreplay for Spartans" is just a joke that goes too far sometimes (although we DO have some exaggerated sources about the Spartans but, surprise surprise, they come from their main rival, Athens so yeah one needs to consider that too. So yeah although the Spartans were strictly military I do not think it is actually realistic to say that they all went like:

lol XD

Two this "Sparta" that they mostly mention is at least 100 years if not more away than the "Sparta" mentioned in the epic cycle. You see the Epic Cycle might have been synthesized at the 8th century BC but the events taking place in it, reflect on the Bronze Age or the Mycenean kingdoms which existed before. These "Spartans" everyone speaks about is usually referring to the Doriean Spartans. The Dorieans were a Greek set of tribes with their own dialect that came down from the north at the year around 1100 BC, around 100 years after the estimated date of the events of the Trojan war and they got to remain to the areas such as Macedonia or Lacedaimona aka Sparta thus we have Macedonians and Spartans speak Doric Greek dialect while Atheneans speak Attic Greek dialect and the Asia Minor greek cities speak Ionian etc Either way as I said the events of the Trojan war happened around 100 years before this Doric Tribe descend much less till the strictly military spartan system to be fully crystallized. So we need to think of that. And even then it is not like the Spartan women were some sort of body-builders who didn't have any sort of binary roles to their society or being active warriors in armies etc (don't mistake them for Amazons guys! Hahahaha!). They did actively excersize more than most Greek cities at that time and they did take part in athletic events more than let's say Athens (Athenean women by n large seemed to participate in sports such as running and those were exclusively for Hera's celebrations) so we can imagine they would be more athletic than the average Greek lady but that doesn't mean they were soldier-trained or anything. The military training was for boys at the city of Sparta. And women still had their own binary roles in their respected society, they just had some more freedom as compared to their Athenean counterparts.

So even if Myceneans DID have a more military form of society or at least based on the findings they did focus on warfare to their art and such and the building of their walls and all they still wouldn't be the same as the doric Sparta that were exclusively military. Could perhaps mycenean Sparta have the basis for the future doric Sparta? Perhaps but I doubt we have sufficient evidence to say they are identical.

Three. I believe that people who wanna desperately depict Penelope as some buff lady, misses the concept of Penelope's strength in the Odyssey. Penelope was not strong because she could fight with the sword. She was strong because she was mentally steadfast, clever and resourceful and enduring and she managed to hold the kingdom of Ithaca steadfast by herself for 20 years. It wasn't about her being buff lady. Homer does seem to imply she was tall and stoutly buillt; see my other post where I mention her physical description in Homer:

but not buff as "I'm gonna kick your ass" buff and all. Homer doesn't mention that any of the Spartan princesses have some specific training (Helen Clytemnestra or Penelope) but later literature implies that they have basic knowledge on weaponry (for example in later 5th century dramas and above Clytemnestra not only is seen wielding a weapon but knowing some basics as to how it was made) but it needs to be said that the posthomeric sources were also influenced by their contemporary Sparta aka the doric military Sparta. Homer doesn't imply that this strict military doric way of life was part of his lore but he does imply that Sparta relies more to its military (as compared to Ithaca or Pylos for example) so maybe he attempts to create the illusion of historical continuation but either way no this whole "300s-like" Sparta was not crystalized yet to the times that Homer synthesized his poems much less to the time of Bronze Age.

And there is no hint that Penelope goes "WOW BLOOD!" that seems to me one of the overused jokes on the internet, again emanating by the whole series of Sparta stereotypes used for comedy. It was in fact Euryclea the one to almost welp in happiness seeing Odysseus covered in blood and that was because Odysseus had killed the men she hated. Penelope doesn't show such a thing. Odysseus also washes himself up to be presentable to her. And even in posthomeric sources Penelope was not linked to physical strength but rather with the strength of her mind and the purity of her intentions (well...except maybe from Parthenius narrative if I recall correctly. There Penelope is pictured as scheming in jealousy against one of the sons Odysseus ellegedly produced and manipulated her husband to kill his illegitimate son)

As for the last part I am not sure what you are referring to? Are you referring to Lycurgus that is mentioned in some later sources as king? I did find for example the reference of Plutarch (who lives much much later) that he implies that Lycurgus lives at the same time as Homer or possibly had met him personally but is that what you are referring to? Either way I assume you refer to the historical person rather than some mythical figure because in homeric realm we do have rulers such as Tyndareus (the king of Sparta father to Helen and Clytemnestra) and Icarius (father to Penelope). It seems that Homer with the mention of the two rulers, even if not directly mentioning it, seems to be winking at the later but still ancient custom of doric Sparta to have two kings but I am not sure if that truly was his objective (and therefore creating an anachronism most likely)

I hope that answers your questions a bit

[badass-queer-couples-battle]

⚔️⚔️ Sword gays showdown, grand finale ⚔️

*Camilla fanart by @friendamedes, used with permission

Propaganda:

For Camilla:

she prefers dual-wielding two short blades but can fight with pretty much anything. she's ambidextrous she's autistic she's even sex-repulsed ace. she sighs longingly when reunited with her weapons. she's from planet academia and dresses like an off-duty librarian. literally one of the most iconic moments of the entire series is when she gets challenged to a duel and absolutely wipes the floor with her opponent even though she doesn't even like rapiers that much. 'swords don't lie.' 

OK I’m sure you’re getting just about every character from The Locked Tomb but Cam is my favorite. She's a nerd AND a jock. She is in this deeply intense and loving and unhealthily codependent soulbond partnership with her best friend second cousin and prince. She is smart and deadpan snarky and fights like a grease fire and I have never been able to get that line out of my head.

For Gideon:

she's incredibly good w/ her two hander and less good with her rapier but she's still pretty good!! she is a horny lesbian who's taste in women seems to exclusively be "girls who have tried or are going to try to kill her". she's a redhead. i love her

Gideon’s a HUGE Butch lesbian and literally always wanted to use a broad sword. Specifically a broad sword. She said fuck rapiers. Uhhh literally dies to save the girl she cares for and the sword she uses then becomes like an altar for said girl. Gideon Nav Supremacy <3

oh she is the most badass swordswoman lesbian in media. she’s her gf’s cavalier, defends her in battle, she’s incredibly butch and buff

C'mon shes THE sword lesbian like... canonically 

Loves her broadsword more than anything on her home planet and practices whenever she can. Spoiler it’s possessed by her mom. Gave everything so her best enemy could eat her soul and become the new saint. The character of all time child of two separate threesomes, child of the god emperor, she’s dead, she’s butch, she’s a dork, she’s doomed by the narrative. She’s my favorite.

girlie is literally the swordswoman supreme. she’s the cavalier primary to her necromancer. she has a fuckoff huge longsword. she gets absorbed into another person SPECIFICALLY to swordfight for them. in a gay way too.

While everyone else was developing common sense, she studied the blade. This dyke's main weapon and true love is the long sword, but she's also passable with a rapier. The sword is, in her own estimation, pretty much all she's good for. That and her smoking hot bod and terribly charming sense of humor. 

"While we were developing common sense, she studied the blade." (Direct quote from the book). She's the most useless lesbian to ever exist, and she's obsessed with an absolute wet cat of a woman. Learned longsword mostly on her own and is such a genius with the sword she learned rapier in a few months (by personal experience, it's really really hard)

Most badass broadsword wielding lesbian easily slaying bone monsters and evil space wasps

The cavalier to her necromancer. very gay. in a complicated codependant lovehate relationship with the only other person her age she knew growing up.

For Xena:

It is HER! The OG woman with a blade! 

Her show was so iconic that any lesbian over the age of 30 knows her IMMEDIATELY because this show probably helped her have her awakening. Fandom foremothers and fathers rise up and get your gal a title.

An all around badass, bisexual woman, comfortable with many different bladed weapons. Her show was so much better than Hercules people forget his exists.

Xena is one of the OGs: once a baddie who turned good, she's a warrior who uses swords, daggers, and her trusty chakram to defeat evil and defend the innocent, while traveling with her kickass girlfriend Gabrielle. 

She has many skills

[exhelluvafan]

Helluva and hazbin hotel being made for porn is true given certain characters such as Loona: She’s 20 years old adult just so it’s fine for her to be depicted in sexual manner at merch and have porn to be made of her aping did shipped with adult characters when her role and personality is her being a stereotypical bratty teenage daughter

About this, I've heard rumors that Loona was actually meant to be 17 by the time that the Helluva pilot got released, but they aged her up so she could be sexualized in merch without anyone saying a thing, but once again, all this is alleged, so take this as a grain of salt. (This is also, allegedly, the same reason why Octavia hasn't received any suggestive merch of her own, btw, but take this as a grain of salt.)

Outside of that, why do you think that Ozzie became the big softie, buff, dom top daddy of Fizzarolli? Why do you think that Fizz and Stolas became defanged and became uwu soft babies bottoms, outside of being Viv's clear Creator's Pet choice (Stolas)?

That's because all of this is just a device that Viv can use to express her twisted, sheltered views of the world, while also making it clear that she has a very obvious problem of fetishizing and stereotyping gay couples, while paying little to no attention to the lesbian / sapphic couples and makes almost all the pansexual males in shows rampant sex deviants that'll fuck anything that moves, while making pan / bi women whores and disgusting individuals, clearly showing Viv's clear misogyny and aversion towards other women.

Also, not so fun fact: before Twitter privated likes, Viv used to like copious, and I mean, MASSIVE amounts of gay porn on her Twitter account, making it pretty clear that Viv doesn't see gay couples as normal relationships, but rather as walking fetishes that she can get off to, so her having a clear problem of fetishizing gay men couples isn't an unfounded claim.

[actuallysaiyan]

Oh man 😂 A speed date with Gohan that turns nsfw? Sign me up please. (Yes I’m that easy)

You’re amazing as always 💚

warnings: smut, mentions of alcohol, unprotected sex, vaginal fingering, possessiveness, speed dating word count: 1.1k pairings: Son Gohan x Fem!Reader summary: Thinking you'd not be connecting with anyone at the speed dating event, a certain half-Saiyan catches your attention and eventually shows you just how connected you two can be.

You can’t believe you let your friend talk you into this. Sure it had been a long time since you were on a date. Even longer since you’ve gotten laid. But it didn’t mean you had to actually go to this dumb speed dating event. You aren’t even really sure why you had said yes, but at the time it had seemed like a good idea. Now that you’re here and seeing everyone, you aren’t really sure it’s that good of an idea.

The conversations aren’t all that good. They are all supposed to last about 5 to 10 minutes, but you barely click with anyone. Most of the men seem to be so focused on one thing and it’s clear what it is. Even some of the women you try to talk to aren’t any better. It frustrates you because all you want is to be able to form a connection with an actual person. 

One of the guys you match up with seems to already have his expectations about you and how this speed date is going to go. He’s buff with his chest puffed out, and he’s got the kind of smile that is so white, you can basically see your reflection in the shine.

“So after this, we’re gonna be getting some drinks. You know the exclusive bar down the street? Yeah, my buddy owns it.” He’s trying so hard to impress you, but you aren’t very much feeling those vibes.

“Is that so?” You ask, your tone isn’t very enthusiastic.

He smirks, “Oh yeah! Been buddies with this guy for so long. He’s really my best guy. He’ll even cook us up some steaks and we can go back to my—”

The buzzer is sounded and you are so relieved. That conversation was getting way too ridiculous. You can’t believe someone like him is actually thinking all this bragging could even work. You’re so quick to pull away from the table, you almost slam into someone. When you look up to apologize, you see the cutest smile ever.

“Hey, that’s okay. You’re my next date, I guess.”

Your eyes widen. It was true. This was the next man you would be chatting with. For the first time since the night began, you finally felt a bit of a connection. A spark of sorts. You and the man you almost ran into sit at the table, and you can hear your last date trying to get your attention. Yet you decide to pay him no mind at all. What matters is the man in front of you.

He’s cute. Very cute. In a nerdy sort of way. You can tell he’s the intellectual type by his attempt at dressing up a bit for this event. It’s just a very casual speed dating event, and yet he is wearing a sports jacket and a tie. You can’t help but be attracted to the fact that he actually decided to put effort into this even if it was just meant to be something casual.

“I’m Gohan,” he introduces himself as the buzzer goes off to announce the time has started.

And from that point on, you and Gohan connected like nobody else in the room. You were right about him being nerdy, but he is also humble and kind and sweet. He’s got your attention, but you’re also his number one priority. It’s almost like the two of you are alone in this room and this is the only date going on.

You’re both having such a good time neither of you really hear the buzzer going off to announce that the speed date is over. Neither of you seem to care when the next pair of people meant to try and connect to you come over to your table. You and Gohan have matched up well and neither of you really want to continue trying to connect with anyone else.

“Wanna go have a drink?” You ask him, and you smile as his cheeks turn pink.

“I’d love to.”

At the bar down the street, which was neither exclusive nor was it owned by that other guy’s buddy, you and Gohan continue your conversation from earlier. One drink turns into two turns into three. You’re both sufficiently buzzed by this point. You know you want to kiss him, but you’re not sure if that would be too forward at this point.

Within a few moments, Gohan has you in the bathroom and the door is locked. A fire is present in his eyes that you didn’t expect. His hand is clamped on your mouth as his other hand is busy sliding down your pants and into your panties. You shudder as his long fingers expertly stimulate you. You’ve never met anyone who could so easily make you feel this way without even really getting to know you more than this.

“You look so damn pretty like this. I bet you’ll look even better when I fuck you.”

His words cause your tummy to erupt with butterflies. You whine against his hand. He maneuvers you to be bent over the sink. You try your best to keep quiet as he pulls your pants down and shoves your panties to the side. You try to look behind you to see how big he is, but he grips onto your hair.

“Just be a good girl and keep quiet, yeah?”

No longer is this man shy and sweet. It would seem that there is a whole other side to him, and it’s exciting you in ways you didn’t even think possible. His large hands spread your legs even more for him, and he doesn’t give you a warning as he pushes into you. You gasp at the stretch. Nobody has ever filled you up like this before. You’ve never ever ever felt a cock this big inside of you. Immediately you’re white-knuckling the counter of the bar bathroom as Gohan starts at a rough and rapid pace. His heavy balls slap against you with every rough thrust.

“You know, when I saw you talking to the last guy before me…” Gohan says between ragged breaths. “ I was starting to get pissed off. How dare he think he could take you away from me?”

You’re shocked to hear these words from him. You’ve only just met and yet he’s being this possessive? It really turns you on, and you feel yourself clenching around him as he continues to explain his feelings to you.

“Awh you like that?” Gohan asks you. “That’s good. Because I have no intention of letting you go.”

[upon-a-starry-night]

Savior Her Pt.1

Demon! Colby Brock x Fem! Reader

Main Masterlist Series Masterlist

Warnings: small gore, being followed, blood

Word Count: 901

Summary: You're being followed and you pray to any Being that will listen to save you. A Demon is the last thing you expect to help you but you're not complaining.

~~

If someone had told you this is how you were going to die you would tell them it was a disappointing end and never leave the house again. 

Truthfully though, perhaps you were being a little dramatic, this guy could just be going in the same direction as you… for the past five blocks…. After making a lot more than 5 lefts and 4 rights. 

But out of the 75% of women who have been followed in America how many of them died? 

Maybe you dropped your wallet?

God, your optimism does not work in situations like this, and it didn’t help that you were shaking like a leaf in a hurricane.

You clutched your bag a little tighter, your knuckles probably turning white from how hard you were holding onto it. It was getting late, later than people were beginning to be out on a Tuesday night. Not to mention it was the middle of November so it was freezing once the sun went down, which it did, hours ago.

Your feet are starting to hurt and your phone call to the police consisted of the male operator telling you to go somewhere public or find a police station and asking you too many times if you were sure you were being followed. Your attempt to lose the stalker in an antique shop did not work, turns out going to a public place does not prevent creepy men from following you into said public place. 

You’re sure your local police are busy helping people who need it more, at least, that’s what you tell yourself when you google map the closest police station to your location and it’s an hour's walk away.

Soon after you have the terrifying realization that you don’t really recognize where you are.

Shit, maybe your father was right, maybe your stupidity really would get you killed

You feel tears trickling down your cheeks, unaware you’d even been on the verge of crying but you don’t really blame yourself.

You spare a glance behind you to see the man has gotten closer, he too seems to realize all of your attempts at safety are falling short. 

He’s an intimidating height, something you only realize now that he’s closer, you can’t tell how buff he is under his hoodie but maybe God was on your side and he was small enough for you to break an arm.

You flinch lightly when you feel a stinging in your palm, realizing you’d been clenching your fist so tight your nails broke the skin, a small amount of red blossoming in little crescents on your skin.

Briefly, you find yourself praying, or calling out to any God or Being that would listen and save you from this nightmare. Maybe death would be more merciful than what this bastard was going to do to you. 

In true victim fashion, you somehow manage to trip over a raised piece of the sidewalk, your bag flies out of your grip and you see your belongings scatter across the concrete. At least if you die the last thing you’ll see is your watermelon-scented hand sanitizer and your smiley face keychain smiling at you one last time. 

It was a cinematic way to go out at least.

You’re sure there’s probably some metaphor that can be made about this.

You hear footsteps approach and prepare for something, anything to happen. Tears still pour from your face and you think about your family, your father, and your brother. Would they miss you? Would they mourn you? Would they care? 

You spent so much of your life wishing they would care about you, or at least leave you alone.

You’re startled out of your thoughts by the sound of grunting behind you, you’re a little scared to turn around, fearing what you may find but you find the strength to lift your body into an upward position. 

Flinching when your open wounds press into the dirty ground.

When you turn to look behind you you’re surprised to see the guy following you being held by his collar by another man. 

You can only see the back of him but you take notice of his short-ish hair, black jeans, boots, and a leather jacket with two twin red flame designs running parallel with his spine. 

You watch him land another blow onto what is probably an already beat-up face, when he pulls his arm back you spot blood on his knuckles and spattered on his hand. 

The mysterious stranger finally lets go of the creep and you nearly let out a gasp as he stumbles back. There’s blood flowing from his nose and mouth, and he looks like he can barely stay conscious enough to stand.

Before the creep can even think of fighting back or running, the leather jacket guy punches him right in the stomach and he crumples to the ground, coughing up more blood that splatters onto the gray concrete.

The mysterious guy bends down to whisper something to the other guy and then stands, giving the guy one last non-committal kick before turning around.

You gasp as haunting blue eyes look around and land on you, there’s blood speckling across his face and he looks as surprised to see you as you are to see him, but what stands out to you the most are the two black masses protruding from his head.

Horns.

Pt.2

-

This is my first ever Colby fic so please let me know what you think!~ Starry (also the title is a play on words- save her and savor her)