#btw his defense is funny as fuck lmao

[thetimelordbatgirl]

Generally love how Mr. Beast has been avoiding addressing all the allegations against him, but as soon as Drama Alert reports on people calling his collab with Logan Paul and KSI product, Lunchly, out for being unhealthy and very money greedy as fuck, he can suddenly respond.

[anikaluv]

miles 42 fic with this maybe ? https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZT88Q1Skn/

you great btw girl!!

CATCH THIS MCFIST —

❤︎︎ pairing:  Miles (e!42) × fem!reader

❤︎︎ genre: fluff

❤︎︎ cw:  cussing, reader and Miles being violent lmao, reader being threatened

❤︎︎ summary: You and Miles work at McDonalds together and one day a rude customer starts to shout at you and things start to go wrong quickly. Thankfully your boyfriend is here to save the day.

❤︎︎ w/c: 1k

❤︎︎ a/n: I really tried to come up with something funny for the title but at one point I just gave up lmao

You wanted to save up your first car. Everyone around you was already getting theirs on their 16th birthdays, but your momma wasn't going to spend 20k on something for you. So, you decided to take matters into your own hands and get a job to save the money. When you told Miles about your plan, he did the most supportive thing any boyfriend would do.

He suggested to work with you of course.

It had been two months since you and Miles started working together at McDonald's. There haven't been any major incidents so far, except for the occasional Karen being upset about the number of fries in her basket. Overall, things were going good.

Your routine had settled into a comfortable pattern. Each day, you would wake up, get dressed, and Miles would pick you up. You both went to work, and after a long day, you'd return home, only to repeat the cycle all over again. Spending so much time together was becoming something cozy for the both of you.

Until one douche had to fuck shit up.

It was a normal Tuesday afternoon, which meant it was busy. The drive thru was jacked up, and people were bustling at the front counters in lines that stretched so far you couldn’t the see the end. You could hear Miles groaning from behind you while preparing himself.

You walked towards him and giggled. Cupping his face between your hands you pulled him to you and stole a light peck as he hummed grogily. “We got this guapo (handsome)”, you whispered before whisking away to appease the people at the counter.

You handled the first few people in line efficiently, taking their orders and swiftly typing them into the pad while completing the transactions with ease. Then, a guy came forward.

He was on the older side and well, quite big. The moment he walked up to tell you his order, he coughed loudly without bothering to cover his mouth. Before you could even speak, he held up a finger, signaling you to wait. You knew that this customer was going to test your patience.

“Hi Sir, welcome! Do you know what you-“ you began, but you were shushed. “Hol’ on darlin’, im still lookin’” he said, not bothering to make eye contact with you, abruptly interrupting your sentence. Gritting your teeth, you responded, "Of course, Sir, take your time."

.

.

.

It has now been 2 minutes. This old, fat, sack of dust has been staring at the menu for 2 minutes and you can tell you weren’t the only one annoyed. The customers eyeing him in line were starting to get restless and soon the curses they were muttering under their breathes would be shouted out loud.

You cleared your throat before speaking, trying to catch his attention. He finally turned towards you. Ignoring his offended face, you brought him back to reality, "Sir, do you know what you would like to order? There are plenty of customers behind you waiting for service," you said, gently nudging him to make a decision.

You watched as the man started to frown deeply at you, clenching his fists and turning red. "Damn woman, can you just wait a goddamn minute?" he snapped, and you raised an eyebrow at his sudden anger towards you, confused if your tone had come off as arrogant.

In defense, you raised your arms, trying to remain calm. "I understand, Sir, it's just that there are a lot of customers waiting behind you, and it seems you don't know what you want to order," you soothed, using a more calming tone as the man clenched his teeth.

"Who are you to talk down to me like this? I don't think you know your place, sweetheart," he said, the affectionate nickname sounding nothing less than condescending. Now you were starting to get angry, but you resisted the urge to shout back, not wanting an employee complaint so early in your employment. Instead, you took deep breaths to stay composed.

However, the man in front of you seemed determined to escalate the situation. "Someone might just have to teach you some manners, doll," he smirked, punching his fist into his hand in a menacing manner. Truth be told, you knew how to defend yourself, but this man was much larger than you, so you couldn't help but feel frightened.

Little did you know, your loving boyfriend had been watching the scene unfold since the beginning, and he decided that it had gone too far.

Miles strode up to the counter, pushing you behind him, and scowled at the decaying load of waste in front of him. He looked the man dead in the eye and said, "Aye man, you can catch this 4 piece combo without the chicken."

Out of nowhere, Miles lunged across the counter and punched the man that probably had a episode on My 600 Pound Life in the face, knocking him off balance and making him fall.

Your eyes widened as people gasped at the scene unfolding in front of them. Some began pulling out their phones to record the spectacle. Miles continued to punch the man repeatedly, the man failing to defend himself in his compromised position.

Feeling a surge of excitement, you jumped over the counter and decided to join in, landing a few punches yourself. "Catch this McFist, bitch!" you shouted as you pummeled the man in his stomach, making his belly shake like jelly.

Eventually, you both decided you had had enough. You stood up and returned behind the counter, Miles going back to work on his order, and you going back to your station, radiating a warm glow like nothing happened. With cheer, you shouted, "Next in line, please!" wearing a grin that reached the stars.

Of course, you and Miles were fired after the videos of the incident blew up and your boss found out. You both had decided that it was worth it, though, you would put a asshole in their place any day.

ENDING A/N: This ended up being more violent then I thought - anyways here anon eat up 😍

TAGLIST: @janaeby @bellstwd @nmgstuff @axeoverblade @zaddyskye69 @agstuffsworld @spidrstar @laylasbunbunny @missusmorales @popeheywardssecretgf @lumineliax @fukingsad @wisteriaflowersss @crxss01 @joliety @fiannee @sylisan @111arianne

TAGS:

[stuck-in-the-ghost-zone]

what happens to nhw after muse? like, publicity wise. especially regarding ashe. idk if you talked about it before or not, i remember seeing things about like. nhw tv appearances and such, but i don't remember if there was anything specifically regarding the pr nightmare of a boy getting mused and going on a murder spree like a localized natural disaster

do they make him go on tv and talk about it? do they rebrand? both? what happens here. i mean it would suck for ashe no matter what probably but yeha

OH NY GOD. I FORGOT I NEVER ANSWERED THIS IM SO SORRY. in my defense i got sick and my brain has been goop since like. sunday. not even going to put this one under a cut everyone gets to see my muse ramblings (muse musings. ha)

ANYWAY. SO. FIRST OFF. nobody knows who he is !!!! to the general public, muse and auxiliary are two different people, and like... there's not really anything there to tie them together. aux's costume was so like bulky full coverage that his identity was Very much hidden, and muse like.... doesn't hide his face at all, but at the same time he's not Ashe because ashe doesn't dress like that or do his hair or makeup like that so. even though his face is on full display I don't think anyone other than his family/friends would make that immediate connection either

obviously like... the prt knows what happened, because of course the wards needed to tell them. publicity-wise, as far as the public is concerned, auxiliary was killed. aux is dead. you remember that one interlude from Vista's pov where she had to look at the greyed out memorial images of the wards who were killed in the leviathan battle? yeah imagine one of those for aux. as far as anyone else knows he died in the fight with overlord (lmao. not like anyone could distinguish identifiable corpses from that mess anyway)

we have played with the idea a few times about a few different topics that there's a subsection of conspiracy theorists on parahumans online that actually connect the dots and get everything right (aux and muse being the same person, Tide and magma being made from the endbringers, etc etc stuff like that that isn't supposed to be public knowledge) but it's extremely funny if they're just a weird fringe group of freaks so nobody ever takes them seriously

the idea that after ashe gets back from being mused and has to go on TV about it makes me so fucking SICK btw that's such a horrid scenario oh my god. I made such a face at that. torture for him!

anyway what actually happens after he gets back from being mused is like.... nothing? really? Trickster takes Mal in exchange for ashe and then they just kind of disappear. and they're left in this horrible paranoid calm period. adn because theyre also gone i think people just assume that either muse went with them or also got killed in that final battle. unsure which option is worse, ashe hearing people talk about muse like hes still out there somewhere (ouch!) or talking about muse like he was killed by his friends (actually now that i type this out i think ashe would prefer this option so much more. man. he has so many issues) it takes ashe a loooong long long time to even consider using his powers again much less entertain the idea of going back to hero work, so it's not really like... an issue? for a bit? we haven't rlly nailed down that period of time yet but I would assume the prt has him under some sort of loose supervision until it's decided that he's not an active threat anymore and he gets to fucking REST for a little bit ! we're intentionally leaving late game nhw a little loose rn because I know I personally just really wanna see how s3 of pd turns out before we nail down anything too solid bc if there's one thing i love about nhw it's referencing back to things happening in canon and making them so much worse ^_^ but I think we've talked about ashe potentially going back to hero stuff eventually under a new name. and nobody can say shit because if a cape has a new name that means they're a different person and nobody can say anything (cough cough looks at armsmaster/defiant) !!!

[absolutehomosexuals]

https://www.tumblr.com/absolutehomosexuals/752107005887610881/its-really-funny-to-me-that-youll-have-countless

This is so, so true!! It's always been insane to me how many Astarion girlies will immediately take him to the brothel after defeating Cazador so he can have an orgy and retraumatize himself. I swear it's like a rite of passage for them…and then they act like "yeah he dissociated but he was excited to do it! It's all fine anyways, it's part of his healing journey!" The ones who coerce Gale to do the orgy are probably worse, by the way!

And to make things better, yeah they go ahead and put him into a poly relationship he also never asks for. I don't care if the devs want us to believe he's genuine about it and enthusiastically consents, it's still super badly written & when you analyze it you can see how nonsensical it actually is. You have to reassure him about his insecurities and he's then excited to give his consent, they say. Yeah well you can even pick the worst option, say you're frustrated about him not fucking you for a while and he's still fine with it! Now what?? 10/10 writing! Whoever wrote this at Larian clearly wasn't giving their best that day lmao, how is this healthy poly representation? But horny fans will defend it no matter what as long as they get the chance to have more sex in the game.

Like, maybe they should just admit they do it because they want their self-insert Tav to fuck both hot guys and get away with it and stop pretending Astarion wants or needs it or because he has anything to gain out of having his first actual relationship, that he can remember of, opened up so soon. "Isn't this hot??!! I now have two boyfriends!!!!" No, it's not. You're just gross! Eww.

We're lucky this is a video game at least because who in their right mind thinks it's a good and sane idea to drag their their (real life) partner, who recently got out of sexual slavery, into brothels to have orgies? And opens up the relationship? What could go wrong?

Hi anon! You're so right btw.

The fundamental issue with these people is that they do not understand s*xual trauma: dissociating during sex is not supposed to be part of your healing journey.

Dissociation is a defense mechanism your brain puts up to protect your psyche from something hurtful or extremely traumatic: sometimes the abused person's brain can "mistake" a harmless event for something to shield itself from, but that argument can be made for regular sex with a stable partner, not a goddamn fo*rsome in a br*thel with a bunch of strangers.

And OF COURSE the devs want these people to think he consented, and will write every bullshit excuse under the sun in their dev notes! It's part of their marketing scheme/fanservice after all.

Honestly we don't understand why these people don't just admit this is their fantasy/k*nk and stop trying to justify it as something that fits Astarion's storyline, because it clearly doesn't.

I hope anyone who regularly plays this kind of route never, ever, dates someone with s*xual trauma because they come off as disrespectful and dangerous for their healing journey.

And before anyone comes for me (- mod orinthara), saying I'm judgemental and "k*nk shaming", I invite you to be quiet because you can't possibly know someone's experiences and what lead them to form this type of opinion. Be respectful.

[autiezo]

The idea of Emo Teen Jean Vicquemare lives rent-free in my head

[It comes from @slonechnik 's DE AU where Harry's still a gym teacher and Kim has to go undercover as one of Harry's new students, for an RCM case. JV's 15, so Kim's 24 and Harry's 25]

It's so fucking funny picturing Jean V. trying to talk to Undercover Cop Kim. I'm gonna strive to make JV such a cringy loser. BTW, I think emo kids are cool, but not Jean lmao.

Anyways, here's a list of JV emo teen headcanons (below the cut):

- Nicknames himself “The Dark Mare”, based on his surname Vicquemare (reference to in-game Narrator's incorrect pronunciation of his French surname)

- No one used to respect Jean or call him by his preferred ‘title’, calling him “Jelly Boy” instead. That is, until the Hex incident happened. Jean finds that any student using his actual name, ‘Jean’, is disrespectful; unless he gives them exclusive permission, then that means he really likes that person. He also loathes being called by his initials and all of Harry's nicknames for him (e.g. Mean Vicky, J.V., Emo emo emo, King Void.)

- If Jean is late for gym class, Harry will jokingly and loudly mimick an alarm that goes, "Emo emo emo" to announce the teen's arrival. Jean a.k.a The Dark Mare obviously hates this. In Harry's defense, HDB does this specific alarm thing for all the regular latecomers. Every student has their unique, mocking call.

- JV hates Harry with a burning passion, despite the man genuinely wanting to support him. JV also does everything to weasel out of group sports.

- When he was 13, he used to get bullied and shoved in lockers a lot. So he has learnt how to pick locks from the inside and outside.

- He has also stabbed his bullies with a sharpened metal fork before, to the point where he made them bleed. Thrice. Harry helped him to prevent JV from getting expelled. Jean did bite his bullies several times, and has bitten Harry before. Harry laughed it off and said, “Son, you can bite me anytime if it helps you relieve stress. You have my permission, I don’t mind”. Which appalled Jean, so he doesn’t bite Harry anymore.

- This is the Hex incident. One day, Cuno's uncle (Kubo) stole Jean's diary and tried to read it out loud to everyone, but J.V. used big words Kubo doesn’t understand, so only part of JV’s secrets got out. J.V. got mocked severely, and Kubo + his gang of idiots ripped JV’s diary into several pieces. Jean yelled that he’d curse them all.

The next day, Kubo got into a car accident, which resulted in him never being able to play football again. Someone’s parents divorced. The gang proceeded to lose at football against the girls' team three times in a row. They begged Harry to talk to J.V. so he did. After much of Harry’s pestering, J.V. reveals that his curses didn’t actually work since curses are specific and they didn’t do what Jean commanded. Jean refused to tell Harry his secrets and said he just wanted everyone to leave him alone. And so, a deal was struck, and everyone stopped being mean to Jean, but people avoided him a ton. Rumours did spread, so many students really did believe that if they upset Jean, they’d be cursed.

- Jean actually has great parents and an ideal emotional support system outside of school lmao. Loser.

- Does actually get decent grades in school. He advanced two years in education

- makes his own emo music and song lyrics. Gave up on his music dreams after studying Literature and Music in community college, when he realised that being an outsider musician won't support himself financially. At age 21, he became a cop and joined the RCM at the same time as Harry (HAHAHAAHAHA)

- Has a lil gay baby crush on Kim but would never admit it to himself. He's also terrible at hiding it. Kim is the only ‘student’ he'd allow to call him by his real name.

- Secretly loves disco music but pretends to hate it. Will subconsciously bob his head up and down to disco music slightly if it plays for long enough.

- Has two pet cats he adores and drops the emo/cool guy facade for. JV pretends and boasts to everyone that he actually wants a pet snake instead, but he's a fuxking LIAR

- Has a chronic need and desire to seem 'cool' whenever people are around(except his family)

[genericpuff]

same anon as last ask. I also have to note: i dont think there are any good reasons for domestic abuse. there are none. you said hades didnt deserve to get slapped but then had previously said "as if the victim of the slap wasn’t a guy who was just as if not more abusive than she was in that relationship in his own fucked up way". reading that it does feel like you are saying he deserved to be slap or trying to justify it. maybe you arent tho? btw i dont give a shit about that man lmao

No, and you're right! But that's always the assumption people make whenever defenses for Minthe are made - that by empathizing with Minthe, or by pointing out that Hades was just as shitty in the relationship as she was, you're excusing domestic violence and abuse - and they're very... strawmen assumptions, IMO.

(TW: abuse)

The issue with the Minthe debate is that a lot of people fail to hold every other abusive character in the comic to the same standards they hold Minthe, and they fail to recognize everything that led up to the slap.

Like, when Hecate slapped the shit out of Hades for being into Persephone, where were people then? It was played off for laughs.

But then Minthe slaps Hades once during an emotional breakdown and all of a sudden she's an irredeemable villain.

No one deserves to be physically or verbally assaulted whether or not mental health is involved. But when mental health is a factor in cases like Minthe - which it is because she was initially designed with BPD until Rachel retconned it on Discord - it's one of those "it's a reason, not an excuse" sort of deals. If LO Minthe was being written by someone who actually cared about mental health representation, she would have been given the same opportunity to grow and learn from her mistakes and past transgressions just as Hades and Persephone have been given.

Instead, Minthe is a villain for having a moment of cruelty during a breakdown, and Hades and Persephone never seem to have to own up to the shit they do. Abuse is never okay, but LO is essentially saying "abuse is okay if you're cute and rich and if you make funny meme faces while you do it."

Characters like Minthe are WAY more interesting than Hades and Persephone BECAUSE of their flaws, she isn't peddled as perfect, she's real. Minthe and characters like her are raw and genuine, they don't feel like they're putting on some act of "niceness", they feel like people, people who make mistakes and fuck up and suffer consequences for their decisions and their action. I've seen a lot of people empathize with and enjoy Minthe's character simply because they do see themselves in her, they see her vulnerabilities and her flaws and her fears and recognize that she's not perfect. Some people truly are irredeemable beyond repair, but Minthe... Minthe still had a fighting chance. We had that chance when she first dumped Thetis, it was so cathartic to see her take control of her own situation and healing... but then RS backtracked on it immediately because she accidentally made the character who she knew she wanted Persephone to turn into a plant way too empathetic. So instead she opted to dial up Minthe's shittiness to 1584923108 in order to get her audience to hate her - and to ensure anyone who did still empathize with her look abusive by extension.

She didn't need or deserve 'another chance' from Hades, or Hecate, or the other people who she had already hurt countless times. But she does deserve to give herself the chance to grow and learn and move forward to something better. We all do. It's why forgiveness is one of the most essential first steps in growth.

I'm tired of reading about H x P "forgiving" themselves for what they do with false platitudes of TherapySpeak. Because they never learn, they keep acting like shitheads and much of their behavior comes across as fake and disingenuous, like they're just putting on a show. And that's when they actually acknowledge their behavior, more often than not their bullshit is celebrated.

I don't want to celebrate abuse. I want to see character development. You can't develop or grow if you're deluded into thinking you're not doing anything wrong. Persephone and Hades have nowhere to go. Minthe had an entire life ahead of her away from Hades and Thetis... and we were robbed of the chance to witness it.

But that's just my two cents.

[sparkymalone]

Weenus Review~

First, Happy Birthday Hiko. I’m late, but so were you :P.

Second, I liked this chapter! I think the idea of Fuyuhiko having a fav dessert cafe. It’s adorable and very in character lol. Idk what a parfait is though so I’m uninformed.

My analysis:

The characters were obviously amazing. The only ones you really had to write to any great degree were, of course, the boys. There’s likely never going to be a complaint about them. I have read a lot of fanfic, and have never seen anyone come close to writing Kuzuhina even half as well as you do. I’ll give Natsupeko an honourable mention. They’re not a couple but you write them well. I like Peko’s focus on the romantic side while Nat focused on the sexual side. Also in character.

Now, I’ve split the content into four parts. The Cafe, the Movies, House and the Ring.

Cafe: I loved this!!! It’s so cute to imagine lil Hiko finding candy stores and sweet cafes. His blond little dumbass sat in a hat and sunglasses to avoid suspicion. I want Hajime and Fuyuhiko to be out at a cafe, and for the waitress to come over, nod at Fuyuhiko’s freckled face and coo “Ohh! Your son’s adorable!” I wonder if Fuyuhiko will ever realise he doesn’t need to be so defensive around Hajime. One day it’d be cute to see him just be all soft, sweet and sappy. It’d also be unlikely :3

Movies: I loved this too! I’ve always loved seeing Hajime be the one to struggle resisting his boyfriend. I hold out hope one day for a Dom Hiko chapter. He’d still bottom of course. I would genuinely love them to fuck in a movie theatre lmao. I want the lights to come back on mid-sex. I like the bathroom scene :3. I always love it when Hajime blows Fuyuhiko. It’s cute seeing Baby Gangsta get his little dom moment.

House: My least favourite part, I won’t lie. I think this part just seemed mechanical. You said yourself you were tired and, unfortunately, I do think there’s an effect here. I would say I loved the top!Fuyuhiko fake out, but it was my idea and I don’t wanna be a narcissist. The sex seemed pretty vanilla for a birthday post. I know they tried a new position, but I kinda thought they could do more. The cafe scene made me want Hajime to put the yoghurt on his fingers and let Fuyuhiko clean them off.

Ring: LOVED this!!! I’m so glad they’re engaged! I know this is but one of the many AU’s, but it’s still adorable! I love that Fuyuhiko basically said “Bitch please. Ring or else.” Such a petty bitch lmao. He’s defo gonna be a groomzilla. Btw when they get married, I want him in a golden wedding dress. You can say “it’s not white” but all I’ll say is those assholes have had a LOT of premarital sex. I want it to be some grand gesture or something to show Fuyuhiko’s trust in him.

Overall Thoughts: I liked this chapter! I do think the second half betrayed slight rush, but other than that it was good! I hope to see more chapters that explore Fuyuhiko’s sweet tooth. Can’t wait to see the next chapter for Hajime’s birthday.

6/10.

Thank youuuu 😭

I'm glad the characterization was good, at least lol. I also love the idea of Fuyuhiko having a favorite cafe, especially when he literally just wants the desserts there. 😆 And I'd love to do a theater scene sometime!

OOF, I appreciate your honesty, but having you call my smut scene "mechanical" HURT 😭 You're obviously not wrong, it just sucks to have my fears confirmed, I guess. I'm seriously considering going back and rewriting it, ngl.

I think it's funny that you liked the whole engagement bit because THAT was the part I was most worried about lmao

Thank you for your analysis, darling 💖

[larsnicklas]

nhln replay of game one i AM watching while i work and i WILL have things to say but i'll stick them all into this post tehe

sasha breakout on the swaggy goal four minutes in was crazy he said oop you're connor m.cdavid? sorry i don't care. i will outskate you. and then he DID! lmfao. and then what a neat job by that whole line. quick touches, getting behind the dpair. and v.erhaeghe did an incredible job chipping that puck onto net from in his skates

hit on oel that left him bloodied should have been a penalty but i won't whine too much about it, i'm not an edmonton o.iler

GUS HIP CHECK??? i love u

speaking of gus he is so perfect to me he is so smart with his stick so good with his gaps

lmfao h.yman and connor getting mauled for falling on top of bob. so real

bob incredible. btw. sometimes you're not very good for a while and when that happens you need your last line of defense to stand tall and that line of defense is bob. luckily he started very sharp and stayed that way

both of the primary forward pk units are SOOO good. i'd stack them up against anyone in the league i just don't think you get better than sasha-reino and stenny-luosto/lundy

that rodrigues goal was such a dagger lmfao like can't score on your vaunted power play and then immediately get scored on? and now you're down 2 while playing well? get fucked. yeehaw

also said it before but so well done by benny to chip it in and outwork and outhustle c.eci to recover the puck and get it into the slot for erod

benny looked so good this game he had a TON of jump. it sucked to lose him for a stretch earlier but he looks really fresh now

lol honest to god to my eye this does not look as lopsided as the shot count. i don't think think florida played well by their standards at all but it is notttt as disastrous as i thought it would be when i saw the shot differential lol

stevie holding two o.ilers at arm's length is so funny

very pathetic flop by leon to send benny to the box btw lmao but that's par for the course. stenny patting him comfortingly on the knee while they're side by side in the penalty box is so me

they looked much better in the third LOL. got the forecheck established a bit more and weathered the score effects of being up two

thank u bob

i will not be watching tonight but i WILL be nervously checking the score every half hour to simulate my experience of being at a concert and checking during outfit changes LOL

[honeysucklethornsandalligtrhorns]

TSP Character Headcanons!!

these are just personal headcanons of mine- you are not obliged to agree :]]

btw this will be a long long post so im putting the cut here lmao

𝕋𝕙𝕖 ℕ𝕒𝕣𝕣𝕒𝕥𝕠𝕣:

-demisexual af. like he sees absolutely no appeal in ANYONE unless he's hardcore bonded with em (cough cough Stanley)

-ik this one is common but he absolutely talks with his hands, like, to the point where you have to stand further back because they're gesturing so much

-cannot STAND anything scented. scented candles, soap, even certain foods (hm? projecting onto characters who?)

-He could change his voice to sound like anything (like with the mannequin wife) they just went with a british accent since it thought it made them sound 'smart and sophisticated'.

-germophobe to the max- always washing his hands, wiping stuff down, etc.. it wears gloves often in order to keep itself clean (and sane)

-only ever eats dark chocolate (FOR THE RECORD I FUCKIN HATE DARK CHOCOLATE)

-he loaded in his human avatar once and hit their funny bone/ulnar nerve HARD against a desk, and proceeded to sob for an hour while Stanley calmed him down

-he/they/it pronouns babyyy

-will often show Stanley the dumbest most grandma/white mom-eqsue facebook memes (he thinks its comedy gold and Stanley never has the heart to tell it that they're oh so painfully unfunny)

-when it realised he had feelings for Stanley he immediately reset out of surprise and fear (stanley was three hours into the baby game and wanted to strangle them afterwards)

𝕊𝕥𝕒𝕟𝕝𝕖𝕪:

-before the Parable he'd use almost an entire bottle of hair gel every day to keep his hair flat (he honestly prefers it natural)

-this guy is the biggest fucking fan of fidget toys. buttons especially.

-pansexual but demiromantic babyyyy

-has in fact eaten several bugs, the current running list including a cockroach, a mealworm, and a surprising number of ants and flies (a lot of them by accident)

-has also eaten dirt, mud, and candy wrappers- he was the type of kid who just put everything in his mouth lmao

-uses 5 million emojis/tone indicators when he texts, it started out as a joke but now he genuinely feels like he can't get his point across without them

-instead of scented things, he can't stand bad textures- the feeling of stucco walls, rubbing your fingernail wrong etc.. it's one of the reasons he's not the biggest fan of slime- he hates the feeling of it sticking to your fingers.

-he fuckin loves citrus. the fruits, the scent, etc..

-when he realised he had feelings for the Narrator he just. locked himself in the broom closet with the bucket for a couple hours.

𝕄𝕒𝕣𝕚𝕖𝕝𝕝𝕒:

-demigirl AND a lesbian babyyy

-she loves berries. blueberries especially.

-yes, she can backflip. she learned how back in high school, trying out for cheer (their crush was on the team and they wanted to impress her).

-has a hard time letting go of things- gets attached very easily lmao. She has a ton of burnt-out candles and broken mugs still sitting around their apartment.

-has punched multiple people in the face and... other places, in defense of her friends- loyal af

-likes to sing but is mediocre at best; they're really into showtunes and 70s 'hippie music'. she got to see stevie nicks in concert, and considers it one of her highest achievements. also partial to heavier stuff like rock and roll

-has a really close relationship with their dad- he helped her a lot growing up and he was so supportive of them when she came out (projecting again?? ME???)

-she has a 14-year-old pet cockatoo named Alfred (idk why im including this it's just something i believe in)

this post is getting so long but i just had to include my favorites, part 2 later!!

[nxdxxh3]

Hello.

I have not posted or reblog or whatever these things are called nowadays. Anyways, I bet no one reads this cus i just wanna give a life update to myself lmao.

I stopped visiting tumblr probably more than 5 years ago?? So around 2018 probably. Oh wow. Okay imma make a timeline then.

2018: I was with my ex boyfriend. Lets just call him A. Things started great then went downhill and i ignored all the red flags yadda yadda yadda typical young girl thats so positive im gonna end up with this guy. Well no. If i could turn back time, i would slap myself in the face and tell her to run. I actually cant remember much back then as im trying to forget everything 2020 and below. But what i did remember is how manipulative he is and a liar. But, i was in "love". I started my diploma this year and graduated already in 2019. We'll get to that year in a second. Anyways, he practically talked me into being with him rather than this really great dude i was dating before him and mind you he had a gf. In my defense, i didnt know as i said earlier, hes manipulative and a liar. The dude before him is from singapore and i was young and thought LDR wont work on me(boy i was wrong.) I needed the physical attention cus well, i was young.. But im glad i did met him physically cus we planned to meet in Johor and it was sweet. okay that got sidetracked but 2018 is like the 2nd year i was with A. During this year, it really went downhill. I started to fall into deep depression and my mental health was bad bad. Thats when i felt i wanted to unalive myself and hurt myself. and i did. the latter i mean. anyways he started working somewhere and i actually was sus about this bitch working there as well. Lets call her S for slut.

2019: Fast forward to 2019. This is the year i got a cyst on my left ovary. Due to reasons i rather not say but i will answer if by any chance someone read this and are curious so go ahead inbox me i guess. But definitely A was contributing to it. Whether directly or indirectly. So yeah, during that time it was bad. I lost my left ovary and i only have 1 now. How i found out you ask? (no one asked but) I had really unbearable pain on my abdominal area. The uterus area like non stop. I thought its the period cramps but i wasnt on my period that time at all. I found out a bit late so the cyst grew until 12cm and i saw it after the removal. Its the size of a baby's head! im not even exaggerating. Its really big. Anyways after the surgery, my family has been there for me. They're really the main reason why im still alive and well mentally and physically. That was in July. and i cant remember anything before that. so lets move on. Towards the end of the year, i found out that A was cheating on me. Not 1, but with 2 different girls. 1 is S and 1 is F. These random ass letters will get me confused but nvm. F is the ex gf. and the funny thing is, F was friends, best friends with S. LMAO. When i found out, the first thing i did was exposing him on my instagram sksk. I cant do anything and im not gonna stay quiet about it. so i just did that. and a lot of people came forward exposing more about him and S. So hes really active with S. Hes been going out, fucking her and F behind my back. and they both dont know about each other's situation btw until F saw my insta story and contacted me to meet up. and we did and i told her everything. all this time A was badmouthing me to his side pieces saying how much of a psycho i am, how i always beg him to stay (fuck no ew i always ask for break ups but he always have a way for words and actions). Like i said, hes manipulative and a liar. the fact he had the audacity to ask me to not stay mad for long as if im still gonna be part of this shitty hole. fuck no. i did confront S at that time and bro i really felt like i wanted to slap her face and drag her across the road but hey hes not that fucking worth it for me to do that. I complete left the whole fiasco and stayed friends with F lmao. shes cool. but sometimes dumb bcs she still stayed with him after everything. although that time A already went public with S he can still manipulated F somehow. A ended up marrying S tho. and side note, i gave A a fossil watch and it was fucking expensive. and he told F he bought it himself lmao. fucker. oh and he often take advantage on me asking me to pay for shit. he did pay sometimes but restaurants that are expensive, i paid. he paid for mamak, hawker stalls and what not lmao. So that ended. And i ended up celebrating new years alone and i fucking glad i did.

2020 -2021 July: So uuh covid came. And i met this dude on May 2020. How? me and my discord friends that i met during covid were planning to meet up and hes one of them who tags along. He just broke up with his ex gf 2-3 days ago that time. How he approached me, he kissed me creepily and suddenly while me and him was alone in a house i rented before covid during my degree. Now that i think back, it was creepy. He said "what if i attacked you right now". LIKE WTF? WHO SAYS THAT. Then he suddenly kissed me. i did not know how to de-escalated the situation. so i just let it slide. we just met for 2 hours btw. and he keeps on asking for a kiss afterwards too. on the way back from the outing, i have to send him back and he did not have a license btw. All the way back, he keeps on asking wanting to kiss me again (of course i said no) and hold my hand (this one i was ok with it although i was so uncomfortable). It was so creepy dude. I dont know if those things counts as assault or not cus i kinda just went along with it but i was uncomfy. Anyways, hes unhygienic, kinda narcissistic also have anger issues. Everytime we played games together, i cant enjoy shit bcs he keeps on tilting and screaming at randoms. (sometimes he tilts on me) I also have to pick him up and send him back after all of our dates. it was a mess. I learned the hard way after agreeing to date him. but during my relationship with him, im the fucked up one. i owned up to my mistakes and im not gonna leave this part out from this timeline. i cheated on him with some random dude. and i wont justify my actions. cheating is still cheating. he did gave me a second chance and i swear to god i did try my best to be better. i don't blame him for acting more suspicious of me and blaming me for everything. but it gets worse and i got tired. i honestly thought i should've just left instead of asking for a second chance. i realized the reason why i asked for a second chance is just to make up for it. bcs i felt bad. and that's not something i should've done. i should've just left and let him healed. trust me that came up a lot of times but seems like he doesn't want us to end either. so the unhappy and most depressing phase of our relationship got dragged until august 2021.

2021 August: I finally had the courage to end things with him for good. Bcs we both tried to move on from the incident but hes not doing well on his end. He still accused me of things that i didn't do. Question everything i did and yes i got tired. again i don't blame him but Its getting unhealthy and toxic for both of us. He keeps on saying he trusts me and i have become better but still act like we're back to square one. I called quits and he doesn't want to in the beginning. But then i had to lie telling him i have another person in my life. and that was his last straw. He screamed and yelled at me and just ended there like that. I felt bad but i cant stay again bcs i felt bad. Its not right.

2021 September - Present: These timelines are getting me confused ngl cus i really cant remember the exact time. anyways before i broke up with my previous bf, i was in another different circle of friends. I spent most of my time there while trying to escape him. i thought maybe if i distant myself its a lot more easier for me to leave and him to forget me. but yea during that time we actually fought a lot bcs of that. so after the break up i spent all of my time there. and i met this random singaporean dude. we spent all night talking and exchanging songs that we like and watching sitcoms. i remember our first show was The Good Place. Our discord server name is The Good Place where we hang a lot. (ldr things) and yes he knows about my past from A to Z. Basically everything i have wrote so far. We played valorant a lot tgt. I know i know, very short amount of time meeting someone new. but bro he hits different. its definitely the rush, the chasing, the butterflies. i haven't felt like that for a while and well, its bcs of my own fault too. i admit everything happens so fast like very fast. so we start really getting to know each other after dating which is weird and can lead to an easy break up especially we're doing long distance. but im not losing this dude. so i said, fuck it. he did say that he scared long distance would be hard but hes willing to try. i did it before and i want to be better. especially for a guy like him. 2 years has passed and today, 13th April 2023, we're still together and getting engage hopefully end of this year. Life has been great since i met him. Everything is different. he accepts me for who i am, we finish each other's dark humors/jokes. We facetime everyday and never get tired of seeing each other. He met my family and i met his. Although we ldr, we make it work. There's ups and down of course and mostly bcs of me lmao cus i self sabotage a lot liddat. but im working on it. and also, i suck at communicating. mostly bcs i usually keep things to myself during my past relationships. but that's what im working on right now and i hope im doing well. besides that, i am finally content and happy. Not a day goes by i never thought of him. I truly love him and i cant wait for what the future holds for us.

Thanks for reading guys. (im probably talking alone rn)

[ladyimaginarium]

man ....... my& founders era first generation jinchuriki oc's were literally SOOOOOOO fucking iconic i& CAAAAAAAANT

they rly were iconic plural representation b4 i& even knew i& was a s.ystem. im& so sad i& never got to explore them more but like. i& love them sm. like.

fusa arashi is the first kazekage's bastard daughter by a tribeswoman in the country & grew up on the streets of sunagakure & she made friends with these street dogs that she made her familiars then she had to like. compete with her legitimate siblings to gain her father's affections & she's forced to be the jinchuriki of shukaku against her will to become the country's pride & weapon & she's literally like. 13-14 when all this is happening. a litcheral child. she rly was so iconic. she was called the wild child & then eventually the desert rose. she'd like. never sleep bc shukaku doesnt let her. she'd have all these fancy fuinjutsu & would seal bitches in sandcastles & have all these wack ass wind jutsu strong enough to level small sections of forests ( & a funny scene in my& head is that whenever she sneezes ppl literally get knocked over if they're too close to her lmao ) & have a sense of smell similar to a bloodhound & bc her mother's tribe were expert hunters she'd be insanely good at hunting & tracking people down similar to a sensory nin & she could like absorb things into her skin & she'd have this summoning contract of raccoon dogs & use her dogs from the streets as familiars & her own personal service dogs & use feral taijutsu attacks like a dog would & much like her future successor gaara used her sand as the ultimate defense.

nii tora was a liberator & she was this warrior princess who led her people to safety in the warring era & then allied w/ the senju to take back her lands & now she's the trusted adviser to the raikage & she willingly took on the role of jinchuriki to matatabi. & my girl was going OFF !!!! she was out here w/ the whole claws & everything & spitting out blue fire & just. overall using blue fire techniques that couldn't be put out with water & was one of the fastest kunoichi in the world & was out here being so iconic bc she's litcherally married to ANOTHER jinchuriki the raikage's brother lmaoooo

yuki shiro was out here being a pirate lord & the lastborn son of the first mizukage & a princess from the yuki clan & he was born albino & thus bc of superstition was seen as like. this dark omen by the entire country & this mf..... this mf deadass went up to his father & was like "aiight since y'all fucking HATE ME SO MUCH i'll be your monster" & took the jinchuriki role w/ pride & he was out here killing his siblings in a civil war & raided across the world & he was actually a major key player in the destruction of uzushiogakure aka the reason why kushina, nagato & karin & to an extent naruto himself dont have a country no more. rip btw his partner is another jinchuriki who's nonbinary & they're. super fucking gay together. & like. not only did this mf have ice release but this mf also had coral manipulation techniques & could like. use shell techniques & his skin was TOUGH

terumi akane..... she's a literal bombshell ilhsm. she a baddie that will Never take no for an answer. she was out here being this. like. spy/assassin & was one of the greatest taijutsu practitioners in the world & her era & willingly took the duty of jinchuriki with her adopted brother head on. she was out here with all these insane green fire techniques & could also use lava release but being the jinchuriki of son goku made it that much more crazy powerful & could make magma armor to protect herself & could also use different variants of lava like strong acidic mud to hot molten rocks to quicklime whether corrosive or noncorrosive to vulcanized rubber stuff to melting flames to ashes.... all in HEELS. she really was That Bitch TM

goemon ishimaru is akane's younger adopted brother. he's a hardhead & ngl a fun loving chaotic dumbass but we love him 4 it. he was on a three man team w/ himself, akane & onoki. he was also the physically strongest member of his village. literally the only reason why he took the role of jinchuriki was because his older sister didn't have to feel alone in the world. he had. insanely massive superhuman strength & could use steam techniques from boil release that could give him even more strength that rivals gyuki the 8 tails & he could also use it to burn & melt surroundings & could use steam armor & he also had horns from kokuo if he chose to. so. yeah thats smth lmfao

homatsu mizuto is shiro's enbyfriend. they were a broke ass enby w/ no lands or titles & would always just... wander the docks & watch the ships pass & they were basically shiro's only friend growing up. literally the only reason why they took the place of jinchuriki was because they didn't want shiro to feel alone in the world & the thrill of adventure. literally everybody thought they were insane but shiro liked them so that's all that mattered. they're literally that meme of the stick people killing people brutally & also the other meme of a neurodivergent stickperson jumping off the walls..... yeah. they also helped shiro w/ the destruction of uzushio. they, like utakata, could use bubble techniques & could use acid techniques in both gaseous & liquid forms that could burn through most materials in seconds & could also like develop this mucus that could immobilize its victims & also use poison techniques. we love 2 see it.

tamamushi takiko was actually kakuzu's apprentice. she was sold to a pleasurehouse by broke parents until kakuzu bought her freedom & set her free. the takikage had other plans for her tho... & that involved becoming the jinchuriki of chomei. kakuzu was her only companion. sure he was a grumpy asshat but she didn't mind. but she's. surprisingly still a really sweet person despite everything. she'd have all these insect techniques like developing chitin to be used as lil weapons or surgical threads & develop an exoskeleton as a defense mechanism & be able to use a bifurcated horn when necessary & she could also molt & release pheromones for a variety of different purposes & was immune to diseases & poisons bc of insect immunity & like the bombardier beetle she had this spray technique that while mixing hydrogen peroxide quinone & her own chakra could be fired at enemies that was a scalding 100 degrees celsius & also have the ability to fly w/ these really pretty wings. she was there the day kakuzu tried to assassinate hashirama. she just rly was the sweetest person ever.

otenki b is tora's husband & we love him sm. he was out here being a great father, gladiator, warrior & revolutionary. very few truly knew his real name. he was his brother's right hand man thru & thru & most ppl to this day internally shit themselves even after he's dead. he was out here fighting the uchiha & was just that badass. he took his duty as a jinchuriki w/ pride & was out here doing black lightning techniques & could do all this crazy shit with swords & could do nintaijutsu & could surround himself in black lightning & bc he was gyuki's jinchuriki he could also do insane feats w/ his superhuman strength & also use ink techniques that could be used to create clones or blind enemies.

im& not gonna get into u.zumaki m.ito bc she's. not rly an oc she's a canon character lmfao but...... she was out here w/ chakra chains that could not only pulverize & beat the living shit out of u & would be capable of fighting a bijuu head on but can also bind & nullify ur chakra & the byakugou seal aka the pinnacle of chakra control, slug sage mode that allowed her to use slug senjutsu w/ acid techniques that could melt through rocks, all ur skin, muscle tissues & bones w/ ease & the nine tails chakra mode on top of that...... g-d help everyone.... mom come pick me up im scared lmao

& btw uh. since this is the founders era....... the og nine jinchuriki could use chakra modes willingly & could achieve partial transformation as well as just. full on transformation & merge w/ their tailed beasts so..... rip @ the entire world lmao

do not reblog unless you're a member of our& system.

[sakycchan]

Today on: reasons why I should stop playing Overwatch!

A conversation I had this morning with a random italian guy:

him: “Nice nickname” me: “Thanks, yours too :)” him: “I’m hetero”

???? Ahahahahahaha ahhah

[moomoomooing]

ok now i gotta know ✊ Would your OC win in a fight against an ostrich? Kyuu and Yuu if u have the chance!

✊ ok so i have some incredibly specific for yuu, this is how they prepare and they monologue this entire thing while fighting (its a video on yt btw-) they will try their damndest to fight (spoiler they will probably lose) but it will be the funniest shit you will have ever seen. everytime you mention ostriches he insists that they're prepared enough to take one down and they weirdly defensive about ostriches (hurt ego from losing to a big ass bird) might actually start carrying a weapon around just to fight ostriches. tho he would absolutely use like a taser on floyd for the funsies if he tried to squeeze to hard wwww

✊ kyuu: he doesn't wanna be there. he is so fucking wary of this bird he doesn't know what to do LMAO eventually he might just grab his staff (i hc that he uses a staff/ his magic pen when actually casting spells cause he thinks its easier for him) and starts beating on the ostrich- he has magic so- hes the one that will actually win this fight. but it is funny seeing this lil man beat an ostrich maybe taller than him with a long stick, he is also very embarrassed he was almost beat by an ostrich in a fight and will do everything in his power to shut you up before you can utter the word ostrich. has those embarrassing invasive thoughts before bed but its just an ostrich and he has to get up and comfort himself. (in general he is scared of this ostrich, whys it gotta be so tall?? whats it so big for???)

OC Ask Game

[realcube]

soft haikyuu!! boys with a baddie* s/o  😈

characters:  yamaguchi, hinata, suga, akaashi, nishinoya & tendou

tw// swearing

*(a/n): anon requested a kinda sassy, sarcastic reader and verbatim ‘she is basically a salt bag, but she also has like some sugar’  so i simplified that down to baddie :) so the reader isn’t really a delinquent but they are a bit rough around the edges uffabvrslbv 

Tadashi Yamaguchi

he definitely thinks you’re really cool and he wants to be just like you :O

bc you give off ‘bad bitch who doesn’t care about what other ppl think about them’ energy and what he would give tO HAVE THAT!!

so that’s when he knew he needed to be your friend >:) 

so he was like ‘tsukki, go talk to (y/n) for me >:)’ thinking that was his first step to becoming confident pfft

luckily, god was on his side though bc the teacher rearranged the seats and you and him were sitting next to each other 

hence, he got the opportunity to talk to you without it seeming too forced

you both fell for each other so hard

like he would act tough to try impress you but you preferred his natural softness while you tried to act uncharacteristically docile so you wouldn’t scare him off but he liked you for your boldness 

it was a match made in heaven 💞

he eventually worked up the courage to ask you out one day and y’all have just been falling more ever since

although, that doesn’t mean yamaguchi’s forgotten one of the main reasons he wanted to be with you in the first place

‘please teach me your ways, (y/n)!’ he pleaded, his head resting on your lap so you had to cover his puppy-eyes with your phone

‘no, tadashi. firstly, you’re sweet and gentle- you’re just built like that. secondly, i don’t have any ‘ways’ to teach you!’

yamaguchi continued to pry, ‘then how are you just so effortlessly self-assured?’

‘who told you that, tadashi?’

‘no one.’ yamaguchi poked the back of your hand to get you to move it, ‘but remember that time one of the guys in our class tried to make fun of the size of your head and you told him to shut up?’

you rolled your eyes, setting your phone aside before placing a brief kiss on yamaguchi’s forehead, ‘he said he couldn’t see the board because of my ‘big head’, tadashi; that’s hardly an insult. also, what else could i have possibly said other than that?’

but then you remembered this is yamaguchi you’re talking to; if that was him, he’d probably apologise, move his head aside then cry in the bathroom or sumn.

‘i should be the one asking you why you’re so insecure. i mean, i know everyone is a little bit insecure about something but you just take it to a whole other level.’ you mused, absentmindedly massaging his scalp

yamaguchi frowned, ‘exactly! teach me how to stop being insecure.’

‘no please, no thank you?’ you inquired with a snicker, realising that your habits might of accidentally rubbed off on him

bc just a few weeks ago, he’d be thanking you for breathing the same air as him but now he didn’t even say ‘please’ when asking for a favour 

gasp

‘please teach me how to be resilient, (y/n).’

you chuckled, leaning down to whisper in his ear, ‘okay, since you’re so polite, i’ll tell you my secret - but promise not to tell anybody else!.’

‘i promise.’ yamaguchi replied without hesitation

‘okay, first thing you need to do is go to the depths of hell and find satan hims--’ 

yamaguchi let out a sigh as he realised that you weren’t being serious then playfully flicked your forehead away, ‘rude.’

you beamed, pressing another kiss upon his forehead, ‘i know~’

Shōyō Hinata

let’s not pretend hinata wasn’t shitting his pants when he first heard about you from kageyama

‘they called me a shitty setter the other day.’

but kageyama failed to mention the part where he cut you in line for lunch 🙄 mans had it coming

like hinata genuinely thought that if he came within a 5 foot radius of you, you’d literally come for volleyball career

plus, hinata knew he had a lot of things to be insults on (mostly, his height) so he decided to keep his distance at first 

but when he actually saw you - rather than a vague description that kageyama conjured - he kinda fell head over heels

well, not only bc of your looks - he isn’t that shallow

but the same day, you dropped your purse/wallet on the walk home and ,mhsince hinata was walking behind you, he acted as any good Samaritan would; picked it up then handed it to you 

then you said something along the lines of ‘thanks, shorty.’

not shawty. lord- shorty as in short with a y at the end

and whether you meant that as a dig or not was beyond him - but either way, he fkn adored it 

also it doesn’t matter whether you are taller or shorter than hinata- he is still short-stuff >:)

by some miracle he managed to ask you out successfully and he’s kinda been glued to you ever since

like he wants to spend every second that he’s not at volleyball club/school with you 

and if you tell him he’s being clingy, he’s going to cry-

nonono jk jk

he’d probably be a bit offended but then give you your space

also, you noticed how he was really endeared by the tad mean nicknames you gave him like ‘shorty’, ‘short stuff’ and ‘ginger’

the only ones he didn’t like was ‘boke’ or ‘dumbass’ bc it reminded him too much of kageyama + tsukishima

so you started calling him these things - teasingly - more frequently 

and he loves it ngl

as long as you aren’t truly mean to him, he enjoys being called these things by you for some reason

so, his first mistake was assuming that you’d like being called these joking nicknames just as much as he does

you were helping him with english once and it’s definitely not his strong suit

same, hinata

‘look at that! you spelt all your vocabs correctly, for a change.’ you commented, peering over the desk at the paper sitting in front of him

his eyes widened and his lips curled into a hopeful smile, ‘really?!’

‘no.’ you snickered, pointing to the first word on the list. ‘your word was taxis - you wrote ‘texas’, dumbass.’

hinata let out an exasperated sigh, propping his elbow onto the table to rest his cheek on his palm

then, he had an idea ( •̀ ω •́ )✧

‘alright, stupidface, should i rewrite them?’

you gasped, furrowing your brows at what he just called you 

for a moment, you thought you might’ve misheard him but upon observing his smug expression, you realised that he really did just call you a ‘stupidface’ 

so you burst out laughing 

obviously, hinata was rather shocked at your reaction

‘hey! what’s so funny?’

‘di- di- did you just call me a ‘stupidface’?!’ you panted in-between cackles, clutching your stomach to soothe the butterflies

hinata jutted out his bottom lip and folding his arms over his chest, ‘yeah, what about it?’

‘that is so cute!- do it again!’ you demanded, enthusiastically slamming your fist against the desk

‘IT’S NOT CUTE!’ hinata barked, playfully flicking your forehead 

once you caught your breath, you took hinata’s hands and looked him dead in the eyes, ‘you’re fucking adorable, shōyō.’

the hoarseness of your voice making it sound like somewhat of a threat 

‘you’re adorable-er, (y/n).’

‘i know.’

Kōshi Sugawara 

he admires how strong and independent you are/seem 😍

and the fact you don’t go out of your way to suck-up to ppl 

he kinda wants to be like you in that sense but unlike yamaguchi, he accepts that he’s way too much of a people pleaser for that lol

so he sticks to admiring you from afar

then he musters up the courage to ask you out with some chocolate cupcakes; the same kind that you accidentally got on his blazer on the first day of second year :))

and you say yes (╯▽╰ )

also a big part of your relationship is aggressive positivity ✨😡

like if he makes a joke about looking crusty, you’ll promptly respond, ‘shut up, kōshi - you look so hot.’

or if you berate yourself for getting a poor mark on a test, suga will interrupt with no hesitation, ‘fuck off, (y/n), you’re literally so smart and hard working - you’ll probably get 100% on the next test.’

also when he’s around you he switches between canon and fanon suga rapidly 

one second he’s like ‘aww, are you stressed bc of school? i’ll bake you some cookies, baby--’ then you’ll jokingly make a comment about his post-practise B.O and he’ll literally get so defensive

‘WOW I OFFER YOU SOMETHING NICE AND THIS IS HOW YOU REPAY ME?! STOP BEING SO MEAN TO ME, COMING FOR MY INSECURITES LIKE THAT  - I WAS JUST ABOUT TO GO FOR A SHOWER ANYWAY GEEZ’ ┗|｀O′|┛

ISVBFELIAEA plz he is too much ✋

he just prides himself in smelling like ocean breeze 99% of the time so you really didn’t need to hurt his feelings like that when you caught him lackin c’mon LMAO

‘wait so are we making cookies or not?’ you inquired, stifling a snicker at his little diva moment

‘ofc we are 🥺’  

he’ll probably use red icing on one of the cookies to draw a ‘>:(’ face then hand it to you, saying that he drew you

he’ll also break of bits of his own cookie and feed it to you’re doing something that requires both hands like typing, homework, dishes etc

whether you eat it from his hand happily, decline his offer or bite his fingers off is really up to you 

and over time, he probably picks up on some of your traits too

especially being more straight-forward 

the team will never forget the first time he was chatting about something with the vice principle and ‘sorry, but i don’t remember asking’  fell from his lips 

everyone was shocked :o

tsukishima, tanaka & noya were so impressed tho

and so were you IVBEAOGVRN

‘wow, suga. you wanna be me so bad.’ you gloated, pressing your hand against your chest 

‘GAEIVBSLR leave me alone.’ he growled, toiling over the apology letter he was currently writing to the vice principal

Keiji Akaashi 

he wanted you to be the dark academia to his light academia pfft

it was very much love at first sight btw 

(ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧ soulmates  *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

the embodiment of opposites attract

he’d write you a poem/love letter to ask you out lol

‘you’re so sappy and lame, akaashi’ you scoffed in attempt to hide the smile that was tugging at the corners of your lips as your eyes finally parted from the letter to meet his 

he couldn’t help but chuckle, ‘so is that a no?’

‘-nonono!’ you shook your head rapidly, hastily correcting him, ‘it’s a yes.’

phew 

honestly, he acted all nonchalant on the outside, but akaashi would’ve been devastated if you rejected him

like he constantly tried to remind himself that you would probably say no, i mean he thought you were way out of his league. plus, it didn’t seem as though you were as much of a romantic as him

but fortunately, apart of him stayed hopeful 

now he was cuddled up beside you on a cold winters’ evening, casually drinking is hot cocoa as you both watched a disney movie (❤´艸｀❤)

he’s the type to not even care or retort if you call him stupid or whatever

as long as your context makes it clear that you’re joking 

he’d never call you those names back though ✋

to him, you’re always gonna be ‘love’ or ‘sweetheart’

also, he’s probably equally as sarcastic as you so that’s not an issue 

ngl he probably gets really insecure when you’re hesitant about PDA tho

like he just wants to hold your hand but he doesn’t want to force it upon you and make you uncomfortable 🥺

but also, perhaps you’re too embarrassed by him to kiss him in public 

so please occasionally reassure him that you love him (；′⌒`) that always washes all his worries away 

Yū Nishinoya

it’s literally canon that he likes ppl who show 0 interest in him (kiyoko, tsukki etc)

so it shouldn’t be surprising that he’s all over you after that one time you called him a midget 

to be fair, he had it coming - he stepped on your fkn toe >:(( 

he does everything in his power to impress you and get you to take back what you said 

‘hey, (y/n)!’ he calls out to you in the middle of the bustling lunch hall, ‘could a midget do this?!’ *backflips off the table*

or when he demanded that you come to one of his volleyball games so you could see what he’s capable of and whenever he makes a good receive, he turns to look at you in the stands and winks/ points

or when he actually studies for a test just so he can flaunt his slightly above average grade to you 

‘look, (y/n), i got a 49%!’ he waves a paper in front of your face, which you stare at before lowering your gaze onto your 95%.

but ngl..he really brings out that lil’ bit of sugar in you 

‘well done, noya.’ you choked out feeling your dignity slowly fade in your chest

he’s just so enthusiastic and charming how can you be mean to him 🥺

to his face, at least

as soon as he leaves you beef about him to your friends

‘he is so annoyingly bodacious - audacious! why does he feel the need to show me all of his achievements like i care??? and why does he have to be so cute while doing it???’

‘do you think you maybe have a teeny-tiny crush on him?--’

‘never.’

nishinoya probably asks you out pretty casually like ‘lemme take you bowling this saturday and i can show how good i am at that too!’ he offered with a bright, bold smile

‘sure, whatever.’

‘kay! it’s a date!’

‘wut-’ but before you could question him further, he sped off

nishinoya really likes to fluster and tease you 

you’ll be sitting waiting for him at the park or whatever and he’ll swagger in and shout something like ‘how’s my gorgeous s/o doing today?! i hope you weren’t waiting for me too long!--’

then you’ll have to quickly shush him before everyone with a 7 feet radius is looking at you judgementally 

he also likes to call you the most extra nicknames just to see you blush

‘good morning, my beautiful, divine, radiant god(dess) who i worship every morning of my life!~’ he sung as he waltzed into your classroom to spend lunch with you 

but he only does that bc you are so dismissive of his advances lol

like if you openly adored his kisses and nicknames, he’d probably do them sparingly  

oh and he calls you ‘my hunny bunny’ too - don’t ask why 

Satori Tendō

you gave him your number/snap for a project and he’s one of those ppl that just assumes that y’all are friend now lol

but that wasn’t nessicarily a bad thing bc you thought he was really cool and you were happy that you still got to talk to him even after the project was over 

not that you’d ever admit it tho (╹ڡ╹ )

he’d send you cursed memes at 3AM and you’d reply like ‘mood’  then he’d fall for you 

you’d also have random, deep convos in the middle of the night 

hence he fell for you even harder 

especially bc he basically just shared his whole life story with you 

he’d spill out all his insecurities to you then you’d reply like ‘ok’ then he knew he had to ask you out bc you’re the first person not to have left him on read

so he asked you to meet him in the park and you’d reply ‘no lol  🖕 ‘ 

then he’d just smile at his phone like ‘wow, they’re so in love with me’

he’s just so used to his friends being mean to him jokingly that he can’t even tell if you’re being serious or not

so he goes to the park at the time he put forward, and ofc you’re there even though you said no bc you didn’t want tendō to show up for nothing 🥺

he was ecstatic that you were there and he probably brought you an energy drink or lollipop then asked you out

and ofc you said yes

i mean- you had kinda developed a soft spot for the poor guy 

you’d let him get away with certain things that others couldn’t around you 

for instance, you’d let him borrow your pencils/pens despite usually not allowing others to get ahold of your stuff

but that was just coz like- he’s your trustworthy bf- not some random classmate who had no reason or motive to be kind enough to return your pencils 

also, you’d let him cut in front of you in the lunch line and he did the same for you

oh and please bully anyone who makes fun of him 🙏

[mikyouknow]

Please! Rewatch the quiz! I need something to remind me that that actually happened.

I still vividly remember that day. Going out on a chill bike ride with my two best friends for the first time in months. Sitting in the cool grass. Having a picknick. Not too hot out, nice weather. AND THEN I GET HOME TO THE ABSOLUTEL SHITSHOW THAT HAPPENED THAT DAY! Because what the HELL even was that, I still haven't processed anything. My mind keeps erasing that memory until some days the it just hits me square in the face and knocks me out 😀

So yeah! I would love it if you talked more about it, might help to cope a bit xD

Okay anon you motivated me, you were my Final push, I’m Doing it ! 🗣

Also I love that story tho you really have a Vivid memory connected to this whole thing and I’m living for it 😂 you were just having a nice day and then Boom, all this mess 💀

But aight so I’m Watching it rn and will be taking notes Live as I watch Here we go:

My first thoughts is, when Dream decides to do the quiz, he seems so like, confident? And then as soon as he reads the description, his voice falters at ‘and now things are changing’ and I’m Dead 💀 his confidence from two seconds prior in that moment goes like 📉 then cue flustered laugh lmao

“Do you ever catch yourself staring at your bff?” Dream’s flustered laugh and being all like “these questions are gonna be so weird” uhhhhh dude what are you expecting you’re taking a are you in love with your best friend quiz 💀

HES SO DEFENSIVE ON THIS ONE LIKE- he keeps wanting to make excuses aww drema aww 😭 it’s okay !! George is pretty we Understand you staring king 😌

Like legit that’s the first question and he’s already so flustered and- MY GOD GEORGE HASNT SAID A THING I JUST REALIZED WAIT HOLD ON I NEED TO GO BACK-

Two scoffs. That’s it 🧍‍♀️

GEORGE JSJWNSOWNEEJEN HES NOT SAYING ANYTHING IM DYING WHAT

Even when Dream first goes ‘aight imma take the am I in love w my best friend test’ George is SILENT 💀

Listen- listen, I’m having a moment over this cause I don’t remember him being silent from the start I thought it was like a slow descent into him just going silent eventually, BUT NO he’s just Silent from the moment the quiz is brought up 💀 but gives like a slight scoff when Dream’s voice wavered at “changing” like he’s very much Listening, just being So silent.

I just can’t wrap my head around how he doesn’t answer any of Dream’s comments, Dream keeps being like ‘right? Like that’s normal, right? Like that’s not weird. Right?’ And George is just SILENT 💀

“Do you get jealous if he or she has a bf or gf” LMAO THIS QUESTION MY BELOVED

His answer is so weird I will die on this hill.

ALSO GEORGE S P E A K S for the first time in the quiz 😭🗣 but not much, he says ‘but’, cause, yk, they both know he do get jealous so.

Which, again. Weird as hell. Imma say it, I’ve never felt jealous of my best friend getting a partner like what ???? W h a t

But ofc when they’re so clingy on each other, like a partner would take the others place because they pretty much have each other in that spot already, so it makes sense huh

And that’s not platonic btw I wanna make that clear LMAO

I think the points of which George laughs are interesting. And there’s something interesting to his laugh too. I don’t see his face lighting up with it, if that makes sense. It’s like a, I wouldn’t say ‘nervous’ laugh but, I struggle to find a better word for it 🤔

AYO MY MANS DREAM SAYS I DONT KNOW TO IF HE GETS BUTTERFLIES FROM GEORGE I- 💀

THATS NOT AN I DONT KNOW QUESTION KING

EITHER YOU DO OR YOU DONT AND YOU KNOW IF YOU DO OR DONT LIKE W H A T

I have to sit with this one for a second like . What ? 🧍‍♀️

Butterflies.

I’ve never. In my life. Like.

That’s not- you can’t say you don’t know- THAT MEANS LIKE-

Dear lord.

Aight I’m moving on (not actually imma be awake thinking about this later. Not by choice, absolutely not. This just won’t leave my brain unfortunately.)

Hang on. George says something here when Dream says ‘I have no idea’ but I can’t tell what he’s saying ? Like he mumbles something whilst Dream starts talking at the same time and I can’t make it out and I wanna know what he says 💀🗣

I Think he says ‘what do you mean you have no idea?’ Which like, YEAH, you Should question him on that king 🧍‍♀️ but it’s interesting how quiet he is, like he barely pushes the question, and this is like the second ?? Time he’s spoken so far. 🧍‍♀️

Also Listen to how flustered Dream sounds my god💀

This quiz never should’ve happened what’s Wrong with him like is he this blind ?? Did he Really think taking this quiz was gonna end well ?? 💀

“TecHniCally🥴”

“My future is your future”

I feel like we’ve talked abt these LMAO such Romantic phrasing my god

Again him going ‘right?’ And George is Dead Silent 💀

It’s interesting, like I’ve reached the ‘dreams’ question now, and it’s hitting now and throughout this quiz how, Dream is Loudly deflective, but George is silently deflective. If that makes sense? Like he’s choosing not to speak so his words can’t be thrown back at him cause he Knows if he speaks it’ll be obvious. Whilst Dream over explains and fucks himself over p much lmao. They’re both just a mess around this subject 💀

“How would You be in my dream” is such a funny sentence from George LMAO he’s so defensive 💀 like even I have had dreams abt Dream, like you’re his Best Friend, ofc you have dreams abt him my guy 💀 deflecting it is so weird. So Weird

“I’ve never hugged you” Sad hours 😔

It’s interesting here. Cause they speak abt the whole ‘do you go out of your way for this person’ and Dream is stuck on if he should say ‘more than anyone else I know’ or not. Which, there’s ofc observations to be had here as well.

But ! What I found interesting here was how George goes onto say ‘you made me pay you’ when Dream says he edited his video for him. And how George keeps the ‘lie’ going for a very short bit before laughing slightly, by god he sounds so.. different? Like when he usually makes little lies to troll or stuff like that, he’s much more extra and keeps the bit going and- idk how to explain it but the tone of his voice is usually way different. Here he seems to, idk, struggle to keep that up. His laugh is also just like, somewhat toneless?

LMAO The MOMENT Dream got the question ‘what do you think abt their laugh’ George’s laugh Stops. 💀

“Do you ever think abt what it would be like to Kiss your best friend?”

THE SILENCE

Also,

how Dream read ‘kiss’ 🤝 how Dream read ‘changing’

Some words hit this man different huh LMAO

“Why did that take you so long” on the kiss question, CALL HIM OUT GEORGE 🗣

HRKEJEKEEJEKJEEIEJ HOW ARE THOSE- SORRY WHAT DREAM ??

“HOW ARE THOSE THE ONLY OPTIONS” ???

God, for real, I wish Dream would get to sit down with someone one day who just Listened to him speak and allowed him to slip up and just sound so in love with George like give himself away simply because nobody is saying how weird he’s-

Hold on.

Wait. A minute.

George.

George is doing that LMAOOOO

Him sitting there silently and not responding to all his small questions abt what he Should answer and such, he’s so smart🧍‍♀️

AIGHT MOVING ON

George’s laugh keeps sounding very, like, strange😅

Anyways the way Dream Had to have a ‘yes’ answer to the kiss one will forever keep me up at night. Now along with the butterflies one🧍‍♀️

I rly wonder what options it is Dream is looking for when he says ‘none of these options’ so often. What is it you wanna say king ?

WHY IS THE BUTTERFLIES QUESTION TWICE AND WHY IS HIS ANSWER NOW DIFFERENT LMAO - drema it’s okay it’s Safe Space 🗣 I feel like he probably saw chat responding to his first answer and realized ‘oop, that’s not platonic’ and changed his answer LMAO 💀 he’s- Ahh hard to find the right words for my Thoughts here, but he’s doing that thing where he looks for others what is ‘normal’ instead of seeing what he feels, cause what He feels is, uh, well we all know what results he got at the end there,,

I mean the kiss question is all u need really. The butterflies one puts icing on the whole cake.

“Do you compare this person to others you’ve dated? Noo...” AIGHT AND THERE WE HAVE THE CHERRY ON TOP OF THE WHOLE THING

This was the one of the Most sus ones imo from when I first watched it. It had my head spin, head in hands for Days.

What do you MEAN you compare him to others you’ve dated? Why does he tell George to shut up, why do they both Know there’s a story there- I have so many questions on this and- this isn’t platonic 💀😭 AT ALL - and there’s no excuse or explanations for this one, they just Move On 💀

The Speed at which they move on 💀

And then George goes So silent 🧍‍♀️

Dream is cruising through the questions and George is so silent now. He was Stunned into silence from that shut up LMAO

I like how Dream picked ‘absolutely’ on being able to tell George everything :’)

So.

Why does George not say anything on the ‘do you think your best friend is in love with you’ question? No joke, no protest, no- no nothing?

That leaves us to fill in the blanks king, just saying🧍‍♀️

Why does Dream sound sarcastic when he says it’s a tough question LMAO

“I have no idea” aight good answer ig LMAO let’s Pretend

George’s silence is for real very sus there. Very. 🥴

Dream putting ‘no’ on thinking he’s in love, is Very funny and shows just how blind he is to himself.

He rly put ‘I don’t know’ for the butterflies one and found the nearest ‘yes’ option for the kiss one and then still put ‘no’ at the end - he’s a lost cause and owns no mirrors I see how it is. (/j btw lmao I have hope in drema ofc, he too can become more self aware one day<3)

“You are a little in love with your best friend” cue both of them laughing in just the weirdest ways. George just sounds absolutely toneless like, I don’t think he’s even smiling with that laugh, gaze absolutely dazed at what he’s being witness to, not even knowing what to do with himself in that moment. And Dream’s laugh is also just, weird?

“You don’t wanna ruin it, Dream.” Followed by Dream’s immediate, “oh what? It says-“ like immediately moving on lmao 💀 that “oh what?” Sounded like “oh what’s that there oh that’s rly weird wow let’s move on from what you just said ahem wow really weird thing over there” LMAO

“There’s a two percent chance there” LMAO

OH NO THE SILENCE WHAT

I THOUGHT I ACCIDENTALLY PAUSED THE VIDEO BUT THE SILENCE IS SO LONG AND SO LOUD

Then Dream going onto pretending like he’s gonna do another test As If he’s not been planning his escape excuse from the very moment he got those test results LMAO

And the silent pauses are taking me out 💀

‘I think we’re done’ HOW COULD HE LEAVE AT THAT POINT 💀💀💀

“COOL PODCAST” IM DEAD ON THE FLOOR

“WHY ARE YOU SO NOSY” DREAM I- WHY U SO DEFENSIVE GEORGE ASKING WHERE YOU’RE GOING IS A NORMAL THING TO ASK 💀YOU’RE THE ONE WHO’S SUDDENLY LEAVING

NOT DREAM AWKWARDLY SINGING THE WIZARD OF OZ-

HE SOUNDS SO WEIRD-

The tone of his voice is so off my guy is so ready to leave and sit and stare at a wall whilst looping heatwaves for five hours 💀

:((((( drema my beloved :((((( it’s okay to be in love !!

Not him leaving- he full on ignored George’s ‘where are you going?’

He’s not going anywhere istg the moment he left that discord he put his head in his hands and just Stared 💀

Poor George 🥺

[papirouge]

More women are talking about the pain of iud insertion so I hope this brings up the topic of just why do girls have to do this in the first place. We don’t and shouldn’t honestly. I never had an iud but every girl I know who had talked about how they threw up, fainted, needed excessive pain killers. And no surprise, pain killers were denied to most black women. This isn’t right

Also babe, was that a screenshot from lolcow on your last post lol I was gonna say you’d probably like LSA too if you haven’t visited there

I remember (a long) time ago when I was considering getting contraceptives of an IUD. I've always been scared of pills (cancerigen) but non hormonal ones seems less harmful. Thankfully I had a classmate who has one and she told me she had struggled quite a lot with it (irregular bleeding, cramps even out of the periods time, etc) so I eventually gave up.

So yeah, contraceptives are a big no to me.

And yes, that was a screenshot of lolcow lol Touché !

I've been doomscrolling on it since yesterday day. I have a love-hate relationship with this website bc the most retarded takes coexist with the most hilarious & based takes.

For example they'll go off against aging scrotes dating younger women, but have a weird obsession with an actor (don't remember his name, he was the Scarlet Witch brother in Avengers 2: Age of Ultron) dating (and marrying) a 42 years old woman who groomed him on the set of a movie she directed when he was still 17 years old... For some reason they are simping hard for him and say how jealous they are of her and seethe at every comment saying how creepy this age gap/grooming situation was. These femcel truly believe female groomers is a progress towards sex equality/a dunk against patriarchy....smh Btw that predator got pregnant a year later after they 'started' the relationship (so he was 18). They call her a queen for leaving her husband and 2 children (who were around her new boyfriend age) and getting a hot new thing.... Typical femscrote behavior

Oh and there are also stupid Amber Heard stan who are still seething at Deep lmao who else is gonna tell them that as problematic and ugly Depp was, their deranged queen has still chosen to date him? 💀 Whenever they go like "DePp iS nOt gOnNa fUck yOu" we should clap back: "I know, Amber did it instead" 🙃 This self burn will never not be funny imo lmaoo

The tinfoil thread is interesting too. I got some new ammo about the Hunter Biden case (100% he's a pedo and a bunch of his files that are hidden are incriminating him on this). I got some nice tea and pics evidence so I like lurking on it to build up my #papiconspiracy archive. I had no idea he was rumoured to have preyed on Malia Obama 🥴 (in the leaked files, there are pics of coke lines with her Goldman Sachs card lol)

And yes I occasionally browse LSA but I this website can be so frickin stupid at times....

I remember that thread about the Smiths kids and OP asking why they weren't mainstream and ppl were like so weirdly defensive about them whenever ppl replied they weren't liked bc they were nepo kids and these girls were like "every other races is ok with nepotism so why is that a problem with Black people!!!" and I my eyes literally rolled out of my head at that strawman because THE HATE OF NEPOTISM IS SHARED BY ALL DEMOGRAPHICS. NO ONE likes nepo kids, period. Why are the Kardashians unanimously hated? the Hadids? actors from celebrities parents (doesn't one of Stranger Things girl gets crap for having a celebrity actor parent)?? That's the thing that irks me the most in LSA: whenever a bad behavior in the Black community is pointed out, there are always people who are like "bUt tHe wHitEs dO tHat tOo!!" k?? AND?? If the Whites collectively throw themselves out of a window does that mean it's ok for Black people to do that as well?? Truly shows the weird inferiority complex of these folks who use Whites as some sort of reference.... The people in the Smith thread were acting so smug pointing out that Black ppl were hypocrite bc we pretend rooting for Black people but were not here for these (nepo) kids.....as if someone Black was enough for us to blindly support them regardless of their background 🫠 they really took the Issa Rae meme a tad too far.....

So yeah LSA can be funny but is also super retarded in the same time. That's why I very seldomly go there. I like going there to know at what time US Black women are💅🏾