#bro will barely look at me and i have zero clue what's up

[saturnplaza]

Got too high, got kissed- am totally fucked- how the fuck am I supposed to go home like this 😭😭

[moon7jay]

STRIP CLUB (p.js)

Warnings : virgin Jay, crude words, just filth tbh, reader works in a strip club (not proofread)

Jay was hesitant, he had never done anything like this before. Sure he kissed a few girls here and there in his high school years but not ever since he became an idol. He just didn't need any unnecessary drama in his life. But he also couldn't say no when jake and sunghoon dragged him to their go to strip club for his birthday.

"U need to get out more you know, get ur dick wet before it falls off due to pussy drought" Jake cackled and Jay felt his head throbbing.

He knew that. He already knew how much his dick demanded to be wrapped in soft and wet pussy folds every night he slept on his bed alone but he was a coward. Never one to take such risks. He was also a man of morals who couldn't fuck around like jake did. So he settled on rubbing his dick raw to bad porno everytime he got hard.

"And what better way to end that drought and lose your virginity than on ur motherfucking birthday my bro! " Sunghoon chimed in, already half drunk before even reaching the club.

"I don't know man.. " Jay mumbled again, looking for some way or reason to run back to the dorms again. This place didn't feel like his scene. What was he even supposed to do here anyway? Ask for pussy? Pay for it? He had 0 clue on how stuff worked here. Blinding lights and deafening music, half naked girls hanging on poles, it was getting hard to focus.

Jake leaned in closer to him as if letting him in on a secret

"once u feel the touch of a woman dude, u r going to be addicted"

Jay didn't doubt that. With how easily hot and bothered he got everytime the stylist noonas brushed his inner thighs on accident. He needed therapy at this point.

Sunghoon groaned from his other side

"Just thinking about pussy is making me restless, I would have been buried in a tight wet cunt by now if I wasn't here to get u laid bro, u should at least pretend to be happy"

"Yeah man, look around, this is a high profile club, celebrities and people who wanna keep their business private come here all the time."

Jake's words helped him relax a bit. But only a bit. The chances of his name being on the headline of tomorrow's dispatch article were less but not zero.

"Look over there, at the balcony on the right, just above the bar"

Jay followed Jake's directions and his gaze settled on you.

Oh wow.

He could feel his throat get dry and lips parched.

U were leaning against the railing of the balcony, smiling down at the customers that were throwing bills up at you, your lips were moving but Jay couldn't hear that over the loud music, he watched as u laughed at something the bartender shouted at u. Jay's eyes traveled down from your angelic face towards your exposed collarbones, he licked his lips. Your silky hairs fell in cascades down the curve of your back. U didn't look real.

Your sinful curves were covered in a baby blue silk dress, barely leaving anything to imagination, the swell of your breasts and ass made jay's fingers twitch.

U were walking, breathing desire and he wanted to bury his fingers in you. He wondered if u smelled as good as u looked.

U looked like his dirtiest wet dream.

Sunghoon chuckled from his side "he's sold"

Jake chuckled back "told u y/n could do him in didn't I? "

Y/n. So that was your name.

"I've arranged a private session with her for u bro, just be a man and don't chicken out of this, she's not easy to get hold of, she also doesn't sleep with customers, but she gives exquisite lap dances" Jake explained.

Jay wanted to kiss Jake. On the mouth.

A lap dance? U would be on his lap? By the end of the night? Ur soft body and ample curves would be rubbing on him? Oh yeah he could now die a happy man. Jay was a very happy man.

His face visibly fell when u leaned away from the railing and disappeared inside somewhere.

"She's also known for making men cum in their pants, so i hope u r wearing ur best underwear mate"

You touched up on ur makeup one last time, applying the vanilla lip gloss on your plump lips evenly. Men were always so easy, anything that smelled like vanilla, they wanted to eat.

The knock on the door interrupted you. Here goes nothing.

"Hii" you greeted Jake and sunghoon, ur breath catching in your throat as u looked at the handsome stranger behind them, his eyes fidgeting all over ur face. His silver hairs were shiny and suited his skin complexion.

Ur eyes couldn't help but be drawn to his impressive physique, the leather jacket he had thrown over his black tucked in shirt highlighted his broad shoulders. The tight black jeans sitting so well on his thick thighs.

Oh u were gonna have fun with this one.

"When u said u were bringing over ur virgin friend I wasn't expecting a treat Jake" u cooed teasingly, making sure ur eyes were on HIM.

His hesitant cat eyes met yours and he gulped. His ears turning red. Cute.

Jake laughed and sunghoon pushed the handsome stranger towards u, close enough that u could count his lashes. His expensive cologne hitting ur nose and making u wanna take a bite out of him.

"U need to take care of him y/n, show him some fun" Sunghoon yelled as they both stepped away from you.

U winked at them and dragged the surprised man inside ur room, closing the door and slamming his back on it. His eyes widened by ur actions, watching u closely, as if unable to understand what was happening.

U pressed your self closer to his tempting body, sliding your hands from his chest to wrapping them around his neck. U could feel how tense he was, his hands not even attempting to move from his sides.

"What's ur name baby?" U asked running ur finger on his lips, flashing him ur most seductive smile.

U saw him gulp once "Jay"

But his voice came out confident. And oh man he sounded hot.

U bit ur lower lip and stood on ur tippy toes, pressing ur cleavage against his chest, your lips inches away from his plump ones

"U can touch me Jay, grope me all u want, I'm here for u to have fun" U whispered, his eyes never leaving yours.

U sensed some hesitance from him, but soon enough large hands grabbed your ass, a gasp falling from your lips.

"That's like a good boy" u crooned, pecking him on his lips briefly, pulling back just as fast.

What u weren't expecting was for him to chase your lips like a starved man, his fingers groping and squeezing ur ass harshly. He captured your lips in his greedy mouth, suckling and kissing with the intention to eat. His teeth punctured ur lower lip making u squeal and He groaned in your mouth when u squirmed against him to press yourself closer to his body.

He pulled away too soon for your liking, both of your breaths heavy. He looked at you in both guilt and desire. His fingers still flexing on your flesh but softly.

"I-im sorry, I don't know what came over me"

His apology had ur head reeling. Never in your line of work had any man apologized to u ever. For hurting u, disrespecting u and never for using ur body for pleasure.

so the genuine regret in his eyes made u momentarily speechless. His eyes were running all over ur face, trying to gauge your reaction but u were a hard woman to read. Jay was smitten with u, with your taste. Your slightly bleeding lower lip made guilt swirl in his chest but your soft curves pressed against him were making him harden in his jeans.

You wordlessly pulled away from him and dragged him further into the room by his hand, pushing him down on the couch, standing in front of him, looking down at his eyes as he stared up at u.

The way he was manspreading naturally made ur thighs clench, his bulge sitting in the middle, your mouth watered. His slightly unbuttoned shirt showing a silver of his honey skin, begging to be marked.

Jay watched in awe as you swayed your body sensually, your hips grinding in air, hands running over your own body, touching yourself in a way his hands itched to do. When u raised an eye brow at him while u slowly dragged your dress up your thighs, jay realised u were teasing him. Giving him a show. U turned around slowly and bent over, Jay's cock was throbbing at this point, your red panties wedged between your pussy lips, surrounded by your thick juicy thighs made him lose his mind.

"Fuck"

As if they had a mind of their own, jay's hands moved and squeezed your plump ass cheeks

"So pretty" His voice sounded foreign to his own ears.

U chuckled and moaned, wiggling ur hips at him

"Yeah? Am I pretty?"

"Very" His breathless voice made u drip. U had forgotten how fun it was to tease virgins.

You turned around to face him again and pulled your panties down your legs. Watching how his mouth fell open, eyes transfixed on your actions, u smirked, throwing your panties at him.

Jay caught that piece of fabric and watched on as you continued to sway sexily, his eyes flicking between the damp fabric in his hands and your sensual body dancing.

Ur panties were wet, his mouth watered and without thinking about it he was burying his nose into the wet patch, groaning loudly, his eyes rolling back in pleasure. Oh god, so this is want a woman's arousal smelled like. He felt his entire body burning with desire, itching and twitching to take, breed and fuck. He felt like an uncontrolled animal as he inhaled your scent further, tongue coming out to lick on ur juices, fuck u tasted good, his other hand squeezed his own bulge shamelessly.

You had never seen such a hot sight before, this very hot man was trying to get off by smelling and licking your wet panties, u could feel your slickness dripping down your thighs.

"U like how I smell?"

he groaned and nodded into ur panties, ur pussy clenched around nothing but air

Without further ado you slipped your silk dress off of your body, letting it pool down around your ankles.

Jay was going to go crazy. He'd never in his life seen a naked woman before. Let alone one as beautiful and breathtaking as u were.

His hands twitched with a violent urge to hold u, rub u, grind on u. Your tits made his head spin, he wanted them in his mouth. To be honest, he wanted a lot of your assets in his mouth.

You took your panties from where he was still inhaling them and threw them across the room, climbing on his lap, ur bare pussy settling right above his bulge. His hands automatically fell around your waist, squeezing u on impulse.

"wanna taste? "

You arched your back to push your tits in his face and he latched on to them without any delay . Groaning and moaning as u gasped, he was slurping on you so messily.

You ran your hands through his hairs, grabbing the back of his head to push him further into ur boobs.

Slowly starting a grinding pace against his growing bulge, u started to give him a lap dance. Pulling on his hairs u pulled his head back and away from your boobs, he was breathing heavily, his dark eyes dripping with lust met yours.

"Never touched a woman before have u? " U asked smiling slyly, his hold on your hips making u grind on his lap harder.

His eyes rolled back at how good the pressure of your bare pussy felt against his clothed cock.

He shook his head weakly, too focused on his hips meeting yours. U suckled on his exposed neck, leaving light marks, being aware that u couldn't leave permanent marks on an idol.

You both panted in each other's mouth as your hips rubbed and grinded on him just right, making a wet mess on the front of his jeans.

"U know how sex works? Dick in pussy, u know how that works yeah? "

Ur filthy mouth was making his head spin with desire. He pushed his hips into yours, making a moan rip through your mouth. He squeezed your flesh freely now, running his hands all over your body. Wondering why he hadn't done this before.

You moaned when he pinched your nipples, squeezing ur boobs, digging his nails into them as his hips thrust up into your womanhood.

"In and out. In and out. That's how it works. Cock goes inside a pussy, wet, hot and tight. Comes out, then slides right back in" u whispered in his ear.

"Fuck" He cursed, making u grind harder and faster against him. His eyes fell onto your lips and he pounced. Your hands wrapped around his neck, pulling him closer as u introduced ur tongue into his mouth. The vanilla on your lips was quite literally making him lose his mind.

U both shared messy open mouthed kisses while humping each other like animals. Tongues gliding over each other, saliva running down your chins, slurping on each other roughly.

"M-more please, n-need more" He whined breaking away from the kiss. He needed more friction, needed more skin on skin contact. Needed sex. Needed ur pussy.

His lust blown eyes made ur resolve crumble

"I don't have sex with my customers baby, but fun can be done in other ways, let me show u heaven yeah? " U asked grinding slowly on him. He nodded too fast, his eyes moving down to see your hands unbuckling his belt and unzipping his jeans.

You stood on ur knees to pull his jeans and boxers down his thighs, leaving them around his knees.

Running your hands on his hard and throbbing dick, you moaned, rubbing his cock head against your clit. A loud gasp fell from his lips and his head fell back on the couch's head rest. Eyes shut in pleasure as he focused on ur hand jerking his cock.

A woman's touch. Yeah, Jay knew his hand won't ever be enough to make him cum ever again.

"So big and girthy, can't believe u haven't buried it in a pussy yet" U whined, just imagining his monster cock deep inside your stomach making your pussy drip

Jay let out the most pornographic moan known to mankind when u settled on his bare cock with your bare wet pussy.

The skin on skin contact making u shudder and sigh in satisfaction.

U started moving almost immediately, unable to stop ur self. Moving your hands to Unbutton his shirt, dragging your nails down his naked chest, feeling his abs, both of u moaning and groaning, grinding against each other.

"This is good isn't it? " U asked, digging ur nails into his abdomen, another sinful moan fell from his lips as he nodded, too dumb to speak, head lost in pleasure.

'Yeah, it's good. It doesn't count as long as ur cock isn't in my pussy right? We can fuck like this but it won't count" U panted, trying to control ur self from slipping his dick inside.

He squeezed your ass and looked down between ur bodies, groaning at how filthy the sight of your pussy lips rubbing on his dick looked. Sliding back and forth. Making a mess.

"Yeah, doesn't count as long as it's not inside" He repeated, his voice heavy with desire. He was seconds away from slamming u on his cock, the heat building and building inside his balls, so heavy and ready with his cum. Squelching sounds filled the room, wet, messy sounds of pussy meeting dick clouded his head.

"Can i put a little bit inside? Just a little bit, please, wanna feel how tight u feel" Jay pants, slowly losing all his inhibitions.

U wanna refuse and reject his offer but at the same time, a little bit won't hurt right? It's not like u both are fucking, just having some fun.

The moment his pleading eyes meet yours, u find ur self nodding

"Just the tip? "

"Yeah, just the tip"

You both moan as his tip breaches your entrance, your nails digging into his shoulders. His tongue hangs out as he fucks his tip in and out of you. Just jamming his engorged cock head against your clit, then dipping it inside your heat, then pulling out. Repeating the process until it's too much for the both of you to take. He's so close to cumming.

Without any warning his hold tightens around ur waist and he's sliding his entire length inside of you.

A scream rips through ur throat and a loud moan of satisfaction falls from his mouth.

Jay's eyes shut in extreme pleasure, the tightness of your pussy squeezing his cock and the overwhelming wet heat makes his dick spurt his fuck cream inside of you.

His body convulses beneath u as he shudders in orgasm "fuck holy fuck oh god " He's babbling incoherently, just using ur pussy to squeeze the last drop of his cum out of his balls. He's thrusting weakly inside u, just wanting to stay in ur heat a little longer. He can't stop cumming, hips grinding in u to stuff u full of his seed. His sweaty body is heaving and he meets your lust blown eyes, watching with a clenched jaw how your fingers move to your clit and u rub furiously, watching him enjoy his first pussy orgasm.

"U r so fucking hot" He whimpers

The way he's shuddering and moaning is so hot u can feel your orgasm at the tip of your tongue.

"Pussy so good yeah? Couldn't control ur self? Came so much inside of me and we didn't even have sex baby"

U moaned, rubbing on ur clit, running your free hand on his naked chest, feeling his body, groaning at how good his dick inside of you felt. Ur hips start to grind and swivel on their own, overstimulating his cock, a broken cry leaving his lips.

Jay never thought pussy could feel so good. So this was what jake and sunghoon were talking about. So this is why heeseung couldn't stop bringing girls over. Pussy.

Fuck. So this is what it meant to be a man.

His hands groped your lower half and u felt your orgasm wash over u instantly, his touch burning your body from inside out.

As u moaned his name, ur sharp nails leaving scratches on his naked chest ,coming around his dick, Jay could feel his himself harden inside of you again.

He watched as ur juices mixed with his own leaked out of your pussy where his cock was still buried inside.

His hips started to thrust up into u as primal instinct took over, animalistic lust glazing his rational mind.

U gasp as his hold on ur body tightens and the next things u know he's turning u around, hovering over u, his dick never leaving ur cunt.

He starts to thrust into u, panting and groaning, just chasing another high. The feeling ur pussy gave him, he wants to feel that again. Ur cries to stop fall on deaf ears, his fingers digging into ur ass to spread ur legs farther, grinding into u, feeling ur wet gummy walls. He bites harshly into the junction of your neck, groaning into ur skin.

"S-slow down Jay oh my god" u cry out, trying to push him away, his assault on ur sensitive pussy too much to take.

But jay's not in his right mind, pleasure taking over all of his senses, morals thrown out the window, all that matters is how good and wet ur cunt feels wrapped around him. God, no wonder jake's a sex addict. Who wouldn't be addicted to this shit.

"He's pounding that pussy good huh? always knew he had it in him despite being a virgin" Jake laughed hearing your cries from where he and sunghoon sat waiting on the stairs.

They had been waiting outside in case Jay came running, giving up on such a good opportunity, and they had to convince him to go back inside. But turns out he wasn't coming out of you anytime soon.

"That's what good pussy will do to a man"

Sunghoon smirked, downing his drink in one go.

"Speaking of which, gonna go find some cunt to fuck, seems like he'll take quite a while in there" He said, throwing the car keys at jake.

Jake pocketed the keys and followed hoon

"Yeah, me too, why should birthday boy have all the fun"

[skatingbi]

I GOT THE JOB AND IM TRAINING RNLETS CELEBRATE WITH MORREEE

CW: Specific details of Anxiety attacks. Mostly modeled after my own symptoms, so definitely read ONLY if ur not feeling anxiety. Also a small detail about su1cide prevention in the beginning but its not explicitly stated to be that.

Also, I'm writing this in a way where Hakuri is self aware of his own issues but has zero clue what tf to do (me too bro) bc I feel like in fics we dont rly dive into the topic of self awareness of ur own mental health that much but idk 🤷🏽‍♂️

Hakuri doesn't have the bravery to ask for help. He knows Chihiro told Shiba what happened, and Shiba hasn't said a word about it. Its his eyes keeping a closer watch that give it away.

Hakuri had only just started being able to look into the mirror again a few days later. When he does he notices that Chihiro evened out the haircut a bit in the front. It's a little awkward looking, especially since his hair has grown out longer in the back since joining the group. The day after, Chihiro acts like nothing happened, Char exclaims how cool his hair is now that it's cut. Hakuri smiled at her and said thank you before they started eating breakfast that day.

Mysteriously, all the scissors and sharp objects that aren't kitchen knives have disappeared. At least, he thinks so. The scissors are gone and right now he's trying to find a safety pin for one of the straps on his pants thats worn down right at the edge of where it's sewn on. He thought they were where the entryway was, but he turned up empty handed. So he searched his shared room, then the bathroom, then the living room, but he gives up after every room comes back empty. The strap will probably stay on for a while longer anyways, he tells himself.

Right now they're hiding out in Hinao's apartment. For the past week Shiba has been teleporting in and out and providing information for Chihiro, especially now that his presence has caused a shift in the sorcerer climate. There's not much to do except wait. So, Hakuri walks over to the kitchen where Chihiro is, out of his trench coat and only wearing the black pants and turtle neck. Its nice to see him a little more relaxed, at least in appearence.

"Chihiro," Chihiro looks up from the opened fridge, "Im not gonna lie...Im bored." He states plainly, which earns him a small quirk from Chihiro's lips and a slight huff that barely reaches his ears.

"We're supposed to stay inside until Shiba gives the all clear," Chihiro glances at Hakuri before looking at the clock, "It is almost time to eat...Maybe we could make some food..." Chihiro almost seems like he's talking to himself and his gaze almost seems to grow distant for a second before his eyes are back on Hakuri.

"Oh, then let me help!" He replies, which earns a small nod from Chihiro before they start to gather everything needed to cook something simple.

Unfortunately, Hakuri only learned the extreme basics during the few months he was homeless and had to work with what he got. He knows how to work a few things from his time at the Sazanami estate as well, but when you have to sneak into the kitchen at 2 am to get food, you can only learn so much without making noise. Hakuri tells this to Chihiro, who listens patiently until he finishes speaking.

"Then I'll leave you to make the Miso and rice, alright?" and there it is again. His friend's tendency to give him an out if he needs it, no matter how small or trivial the task is. It makes Hakuri's heart stutter, but he brushes the feeling off with a smile.

"You got it!" is the last thing said between them before they prepare some lunch for the rest of the occupants. He quickly becomes distracted with his task of measurements. 5 people and considering leftovers for tomorrow, rice can be made into fried rice, miso is probably best made with exact measurements anyways since they have the easy stuff that only takes 5 minutes and some hot water to prepare. Chihiro already has the tofu and seaweed prepped for him.

The silence is strangely comforting. Hakuri usually hates silence, it usually implied disaster or someone's mind coming up with a harsh punishment, but he knows Chihiro is just a quiet man by default. They don't bump into each other once, even when Chihiro had to nearly press into his space to get something from one of the cupboards.

He focuses on that split second of warmth and latches onto it right when it pulls away completely. It leaves him pink, warm, and heart stuttering again. The back of his mind where he shoves all of his true wants screams to reach out again. To lean his shoulder against Chihiro's at the bare minimum.

Lunch is done, though, so Hakuri instead helps gather Char and Hinao before they all plate their own portion of food. Instead of sitting at the kitchen like normal, they all decide to eat in the living room since Shiba hasn't come back yet.

Even while eating, the warmth of Chihiro is still there. It cant even be replaced by the miso. As Hakuri eats with his friends, he wonders if Chihiro thought of his warmth too.

Its 3 am and he cant fall asleep. Shiba returned shortly after lunch and brought news of the effects of the Sazanami family's downfall and crumbling authority over the sorcerer world as a result. He explained how Hakuri's presence will put a target on his and everyone's back right now, especially when he was seen with Chihiro the night of the auction. Chihiro had decided that it was too dangerous to go out just yet, much to the dark haired man's own concerns about the swords still out there.

That conversation let Hakuri's own thoughts simmer until now, boiled over and burning and painful in his own mind. Right now, at 3am, he cant sit still. His thoughts are going a million miles a minute, his heart hurts, theres a headache forming from all the tension coiling up his body.

This sucks. He hates this feeling and it always comes and goes whenever it pleases. What's even worse is that he knows exactly what it is and can't figure out how to fix it: an anxiety attack. Screw his own self awareness.

So, for the past hour, Hakuri has resigned to his fate of having to ride out the excruciating anxiety burning itself into his mind. It doesn't physically hurt per se, but it definitely leaves uncomfortable symptoms and equally unpleasant physical attributes. He had to quietly leave the shared bedroom and pace around the bathroom since Shiba took the couch. Its the only source of privacy, much to his dismay since the bathroom is not big enough to pace around in.

It's barely past 3 am when a soft knock is heard at the door.

"Hakuri?" A deep, tired voice calls out. Tired enough where softness still lingers around the edges. It startles Hakuri enough to delay his own spiraling for a few moments.

"Yeah? Sorry, wait, hold on," Hakuri isn't really able to gather himself enough to speak, with his thoughts muddled so much that speaking is not on his list of priorities. It's too late/early to think about that. He opens the door a bit to Chihiro, in a black shirt and sweats with his hair a little messy, "I, uhm, cant sleep. Too much going on." He says. Chihiro nods and leans against the doorway.

"Do you need anything?" Chihiro asks, red eyes matching the gentle whisper of his voice. Hakuri tries to think the question over but pulls out blanks so he shrugs slightly. Chihiro's hand touches his shoulder and it guides him back to their shared room, right to Hakuri's futon.

Hakuri sits down and shakes his head, now that he's sitting still his hands shake so much that his fingers barely cooperate when he wants to flex his fingers. "No-No I just need to...ride this out? Nothing helps." He breathes out, shaky and nervous now that his vulnerability is laid bare and there's no running from it. At least the lights are off, he thinks. Chihiro just nods and kneels in front of him, similar to when he found Hakuri in the bathroom with scissors in his hands. He doesn't say anything and he doesn't need to. Chihiro telegraphs his movements with practiced ease. Maybe he got the skill from Char, or learned after what happened to him several years ago. Maybe it's just subconscious, a habit that formed with no important reason other than Chihiro's need to save others in little ways outside of swordsmanship.

Hakuri's distracted enough that he flinches a bit when both of the other's hands rest firmly on his shoulders, and the pressure from the contact is strangely comforting. Hakuri wants to relax under it, to soak in the warmth from calloused palms hidden by the fabric of the cotton shirt. Maybe he wants to let himself be selfish, even if the cruel voice in his mind screams at him that he doesn't deserve the comfort.

"I have an idea," Chihiro states softly, "Deep pressure therapy. It needs physical contact, so if you don't want that I understand." Chihiro says. His dark silhouette is like a shadow in the dimness of the bedroom. It's almost scary that even though he's actively trying to minimize his presence, it's still a little intimidating in its own right. It fascinates Hakuri; how Chihiro is naturally terrifying yet makes so much effort to comfort him like he's worthy of it.

Hakuri decides then that he wants that. Anxiety and crumbled mental health be damned.

"Okay," Hakuri whispers, "I trust you." because he does. It's terrifying how much he trusts the man before him. How much he's comforted by sharp vermillion and coal, a heavy contrast to melting ice and the early morning sky. He sits still, holding his breath and waiting, hands still shaking along with his body and his heart palpitating from stress and something else unrecognizable.

Chihiro wordlessly shifts forward until his hands press down a little more, and Hakuri quickly finds them laid down in his futon. Chihiro is laying half his bodyweight on top of him, arms wrapped around his waist tightly so it's enough to create a pressure that blankets his senses almost immediately. Their legs are tangled, and it's a little awkward for a few minutes especially when you're cuddling with a friend who never seemed to favor physical contact at all. If theres one thing Hakuri knows for certain, though, is that Chihiro never does something he'd be uncomfortable doing when it comes to topics outside of sword fighting.

Eventually, to make it less awkward is what Hakuri tells himself, he wraps his own arms around Chihiro's waist to keep the shorter man from sliding off of him.

It's...comfortable. It's warm, and the raven hair tickles his nose a bit. Theres softness lingering in the contact shared that contradicts nicely with the weight of Chihiro on top of him. Hakuri also realizes that despite their height difference (it's small, but noticable enough for Hinao to poke fun at Chihiro occasionally) they fit really nicely together. Like two puzzle pieces directly in the center of the board.

They don't talk but they don't need to. Hakuri's heart slows while the ambient noises of cars and sirens outside drown out the rest of his thoughts. He sighs and basks in comfort and safety that he'd never thought he'd feel again.

He doesn't have nightmares that night, and neither does Chihiro.

Sighs...my taste in manga has evolved. Time for Kagurabachi

Also I cant sleep bc i have an interview in 11 hours so take this unedited contribution to the fandom

CW: Hakuri's childhood trauma and PTSD, descriptions of PTSD triggers and Anxiety

Hakuri cut his hair.

In hindsight (10 seconds ago) it was a stupid, impulsive decision made out of sheer anguish, anger, sadness, grief, and emotional instability. In all fairness, it was only the longer part of his hair, the part he wrapped with a ribbon to keep together and out of his face. He cut it too short, though. Now, it's choppy and anyone can see from a mile away that he cut them with paper scissors he found in a drawer near the kitchen.

He doesn't really remember how he got here, only that he looked in the mirror. He saw his siblings staring back at him, disappointed, disgusted, apathetic towards him and then he felt the bruises that have since been long gone from his skin. He felt the crooked fingernails, the bones improperly healed in his hands shaking from how tense he got so quickly.

He felt fear.

Now, his hair is choppy on one side. Tears well up even more and he realizes that he's been crying. Looking in the mirror again, it's just him, the scissors, his red face and puffy eyes staring back and his god awful haircut.

He hears the front door open and close and in a stupid attempt to hide himself he slams the bathroom door shut. Shortly after locking it, he hears Chihiro's voice amongst everyone else's usual chatter.

"Hakuri?" He calls out, and he feels his footsteps grow closer. Hakuri's hands tremble, dropping the scissors. He doesnt know what to do. He knows Chihiro wont get mad, maybe Char will laugh at his hair for a bit. Unfortunately, his rational mind hasnt caught up yet. Its far behind in the race to claw out the hair from the sink and throw it in the small trash bin in the corner. Theres a knock at the bathroom door and Hakuri jumps at the sudden noise.

"Hakuri? You okay?" Chihiro asks, voice laced with concern through the door. It takes a moment for Hakuri to try and compose himself, clearing his throat enough to reply, "Yeah-Yeah I'm fine!"

Chihiro clearly doesnt buy it, "You dont sound okay," The door knob rattles softly, "Can you open the door?"

Hakuri shakes his head before he realizes he needs to speak, backing away from the door, but then deciding against it with how rough his vocal cords feel, "I...I messed up, Chihiro," He admits, another sob escaping him before he can stop it.

"I'm not hurt! Promise! I just-just messed up and it looks bad and I dont want you to judge me."

Silence stretches for only a few seconds, and Hakuri swears he hears Chihiro's breathing through the door.

"Hakuri, I swear to you I will not judge," Chihiro's voice is low and reassuring, more than Hakuri believes he's deserving of right now, "Let me in?"

He doesnt know how Chihiro can just give promises like that to him when theyre so rare. Its a moment of raw vulnerability that he's displaying, all for the sake of making sure Hakuri is okay. The ugly part of him tells him he doesnt deserve it, that he's better off staying locked in the bathroom and telling Chihiro to leave. That rational part of him knows it wont work, that its not true because the man on the other side of that door believes he deserves more.

He unlocks the door, but cant bring himself to open it, so Chihiro meets him halfway and slowly opens the door to enter the bathroom, closing it behind him before looking up.

Theres a longer stretch of silence, Chihiro's expression doesnt show any hint of what Hakuri is looking for. He's indifferent, but thats his normal look. He watches with ingrained perceptiveness as the other's eyes dart around cautiously before landing on the evidence of his unfortunate haircut and mental breakdown.

"Ah, you cut your hair." Thats all chihiro says before bending down to pick up the scissors, placing them on the sink's counter carefully. Hakuri can only stare at the floor and nod. He can feel tears threatening to form again and now he feels like crying for two reasons instead of one. His head hurts.

Theres a hand on his shoulder, thumb just barely touching his neck and Hakuri has to fight back the instinct to run. Chihiro notices, but his hand stays right where it is as a soothing presence amist the last dregs of his breakdown plaguing his brain.

"Its not that bad, you just need to even it out," Chihiro states, "I can cut it for you, if you want." The offer stands as an out for Hakuri. Chihiro does those a lot, where he'll offer to do something for him but give him the verbal reassurance that he can leave or say no whenever he wants to. He considers it for a moment, before squashing down his shame and giving a shallow nod.

"Stay here, I'll get proper scissors." Then Chihiro disappears from the room.

Hakuri sits on the toilet lid in the meantime, exhaustion slowly creeping in as he starts to remember bits and pieces of the episode. He remembers Shiba telling him about how some people have them when they're healing from trauma of some kind. Lately, he's had more than usual, mostly at night in his nightmares or when he's so anxious he cant sleep and has to pace around the tiny room to tire himself out.

He remembers Shiba telling him about what exactly he's going through, too.

"Its called PTSD. A lot of people have it, especially because of the war. Make no mistake, though, kid. Anyone can have it, and its a bitch to deal with, but eventually you learn how to live in spite of it."

That conversation was mentally taxing, he thinks. He wonders if this is a part of that, too. Could he have stopped it? Been normal? Or maybe he could have fought back, even if it ended in something miraculously worse than mental scars.

He doesn't hear Chihiro enter the room again, but he does make his presence obvious by standing in front of him, startling Hakuri from his thoughts.

"If you change your mind, even halfway through, just tell me," Chihiro whispers as he kneels down before Hakuri.

"Okay, I promise," He whispers back, voice shaky once he feels calloused hands brushing through his hair. Chihiro gives him a small smile, one of those rare ones that never see the light of day. For one quick moment Hakuri thinks about how he wants to see Chihiro smile more.

The hair cutting is simple, and Hakuri has to close his eyes unless he'd rather blink away the small bits of hair that fall onto his face. He sputters a bit when some get in his mouth and it makes Chihiro huff whats his own version of a laugh, just a small puff of air what would be seen as mild sarcasm to most people. It feels like hours of Chihiro's hands carding through his hair, his hands gently brushing the hair away from his eyes, the sound of scissors snipping through the choppy bits of Hakuri's remnants of what he remembers seeing in the mirror.

He opens his eyes when Chihiro puts down the scissors, and is met with the man's own eyes staring. He doesn't want to look away yet. When he's letting his guard down, even for a fraction of a second, there's a softness to him that's impossible to ignore. Hakuri wants to take it in, maybe even ingrain it into his mind like a polaroid for him to keep forever. He doesn't want to look in the mirror yet and Chihiro wont ask him to.

"Thank you," He murmurs, still looking at Chihiro and the deep red eyes that crinkle minutely. He notices then that maybe Chihiro has been smiling more than he thought.

"Are you feeling alright enough to leave the bathroom?" Chihiro asks, standing and offering a hand that Hakuri takes so he stands with him.

"Yeah. I think so," He yawns, "Tired though."

"Thats okay, I'll let the others know not to disturb you." Hakuri nods in acknowledgement. Chihiro guides Hakuri to leave the bathroom with him and doesnt leave his side until Hakuri is lying on his futon in their tiny shared room that they're borrowing from Hinao.

Once comfortable with the sheets up to his chin and facing Chihiro, who stands in the doorway still, he smiles. It's a small one, tired and grateful for the other's presence and help through an ugly moment.

"Hakuri?" Chihiro's voice betrays his's stoic expression.

"Yeah?" His own voice wavers, too.

"If you ever have an episode again and need help, call for me or Shiba." Chihiro says, setting his voice so there's no room for negotiation. He's serious, and that rattles Hakuri a little.

"Okay, I will," He answers back, hoping to gain the bravery to ask for help for something like this. Chihiro nods and shuts the door behind him shortly after leaving.

[fidelissimi-moved]

I posted 1,482 times in 2021

545 posts created (37%)

937 posts reblogged (63%)

For every post I created, I reblogged 1.7 posts.

I added 702 tags in 2021

#001. writing & prompts ( meme ) - 113 posts

#000. out of character ( dorie just keeps swimming ) - 86 posts

#tobeblamed - 84 posts

#004. about ruby ( countenance ) - 84 posts

#soulboundwinchester - 73 posts

#sunsymbols - 69 posts

#au: bunkerverse season 8 - 66 posts

#s9: au - 50 posts

#002. relationship: ruby & sam winchester - 41 posts

#001. writing & prompts ( headcanon ) - 36 posts

Longest Tag: 120 characters

#(im steadfastly keeping both her mouth and mine shut about what we thought about dean's looks in s8. its safer that way)

My Top Posts in 2021

#5

7 !!!

Tumblr users themed questions

7. Favorite blog(s)?

all of you?? okay, i’m gonna just put a small list, and i’m sorry if i’m leaving anyone out,i don’t mean to.

@seesgood / @jigscw / @shallowsurvived, @themisfortunateson / @saltcburn / @monstrumviri, @tobeblamed, @sunsymbols, @seraphaem / @cowboyruckus, @heartsurpluss, @failedhero, @delabor, @enduringlystoic, @dissolvedshadows / @formerlyrighteous, @demonstigma, @redruined, @multapersona / @blessedisdeath, @moonwoken, @brknlostsouls, @dalphahale, @artivexed, @brokenlilsoldier, @crackedmxgic, @endfaith, @inkchester, @kgbastard / @verdansks, @peaceific, @shieldworn, @shesdaylight, @trageadies, @themechaneer, @wolfhymns, @willchosen.

16 notes • Posted 2021-04-12 02:25:31 GMT

#4

Okay I’m gonna bring up an issue I have and I don’t mean to point fingers or anything but I realized that there’s been an assumption that’s made about demons and is used to “identify” them when but there isn’t any canon proof to back it up. I’ve had so many people use this as an excuse to know that Ruby is a demon, but it’s literal bullshit and I need this to STOP.

YOU  CAN’T  SMELL  A  DEMON.  THEY  DON’T  SMELL  LIKE  SULFUR.  THEY  DON’T  SMELL  LIKE  ANYTHING  THAT  WOULD  IDENTIFY  THEM  AS  A  DEMON.

So here’s why I say that.

Meg, in season 1, meets Sam on the side of the road and Sam never suspects a thing about her, or smells any certain type of smell that would inform him of her being a demon. She even sees him again later and still, right up in his face, he has no clue, and when Dean gets close to them, he has no clue either. 

Ruby, in season 3, sits across the table from Sam in the diner, never mentioning what she is, leading him to believe she’s a hunter with some connection somewhere to his mother. Not once does he ever suspect she’s a demon, even going as far as getting in her face at one point later in the episode in his motel room and still, he’s oblivious. UNTIL SHE FLASHES BLACK EYES AT HIM.

In season 4, Ruby stands right in front of Dean and Bobby in the doorway of her and Sam’s motel room and completely fools them about what she is, even sticking around to get changed into some different clothes while conversing with Sam, with zero worry in the world about Dean or Bobby recognizing who or what she is.

The show did, in it’s early days, play to the fact that demons left behind sulfur when they manifested somewhere, but even then, if they were a low enough level demon (Ruby, Meg, any black eyed demon), it was barely a trace of sulfur, as opposed to demons like Azazel, who left piles of sulfur when he manifested somewhere because he was a higher level demon.

(check my source bro)

There has never been anything alluding to the fact that demons actually smell like sulfur though, or have any distinct scent whatsoever. Just because they left behind trace amounts of sulfur dust WHEN THEY MANIFESTED somewhere (and not just when they walk around like everyone else.)

Basically this is me pleading with you guys, don’t assume things like this. Demon’s have no scent. They leave behind sulfur when they manifest, but that doesn’t mean the smell follows them around or they would’ve been had by WAY more hunters at this point. 

18 notes • Posted 2021-04-20 18:36:19 GMT

#3

@sunsymbols​ said:     “ you didn’t have to come ya know? i’m glad you did though. ”

See the full post

19 notes • Posted 2021-03-26 04:33:11 GMT

#2

indie, private, selective RUBY from the CW’s Supernatural

established 2012

reimagined by dorie

56 notes • Posted 2021-03-22 03:48:43 GMT

#1

ruby closes the door behind them as they walk into the cabin, peeling her boots off in the doorway to set by the fire later to dry. she's keeping one eye on sam constantly now, not so much afraid of something physically happening as she is worried that his mind might snatch him away from reality again before he's come back all the way.

"will you grab towels?" she asks, turning her back to him to peel her soaked through jeans down her hips. "you probably won't drip through the house as bad as I will right now." her hair is plastered to her head and her shirt soaked through on the trip back through the woods in the rain.

@soulboundwinchester gets a starter!!!

60 notes • Posted 2021-04-26 14:28:36 GMT

Get your Tumblr 2021 Year in Review →

[bigboomboi]

A gift Worth Thousands

Words: 3,297

Warning: Cursing and that’s about it, nothing but fluff here

Happy Birthday Bakugo Katsuki!

As soon as Bakugo woke up, he knew what day it was. The thought irritated him to no end, because for some reason people always thought to make a big deal out of it. It was just a stupid day, like every other stupid day. There was no need for the dumb, annoyingly loud singing or several random people running up to say it all day… or the bountiful amount of gifts he never actually got.

Yeah. None of that ever happened. Not for him anyway.

In all his years 1-A tried to celebrate his birthday once their first year and out of embarrassment-disguised as irritance he blew up the cake. Now, no one actually does anything for his birthday. He'll get the occasional birthday frame on snapchat from all his streaks. But that'll be it. Well, that and the birthday text from his parents. But, nothing more.

So, he thinks, until he opens his door.

"What the fuck?" A small box sat on the floor. If it hadn't been for the bright polka dotted wrapping paper he wouldn't have seen it.

He picked it up and shook it gently, like it was going to tell him what was in it. A low thunking echoed from inside it and in his piqued interest he ripped the lid off, ungracefully.

'Happy Birthday, Bakugo!'- A simple kind of note, typed so he wouldn't know the handwriting.

Under the note sat a small ceramic bomb-omb. Nothing more to it, nothing less. Just a-kind of- adorable paperweight.

He rolled his eyes at the gift, and looked over everything to find the gifter, but found nothing. What kind of idiot doesn't put their name on a gift?

"Whatever, thanks whoever." He grumbled turning back into his room to set the paperweight on his desk before rushing off to start his early morning training. 

During his workout, he managed to forget about the gift he got, and almost about his birthday altogether. All the way up until he was greeted by two gift boxes in front of his door, these bigger than the last he got. He scooped the two boxes up, once again not finding any indication of the senders.

Bakugo opened the longer box of the two, his eyebrows furrowing at the two black, and orange wooden sticks carefully placed, crossing each other. Looking closer at them, he found that they were custom made drumsticks. They both had his name elegantly carved into the base, small explosion drawings on either side of his name.

He looked at the note left on the bottom of the box ‘I know you broke your last set… and the others, so these are made out of Hickory, a bit heavier than the Maple ones the school gives but sturdier. Happy Birthday!’ Once again, no name. 

He pulled open the next gift, the simple note on top short and sweet. ‘I thought you’d like this one, Happy Birthday :)’ It was a pro switch controller, in his hero colours, his initials detailed onto the left bottom side of the controller. Another thing inside the box was a dock, also detailed for him. Explosions covered it, and his common saying of ‘Die Extras’ slanted on the front side. He flipped it over to find the back was decorated with his name.

Bakugo covered his face and scoffed, realizing he was smiling at the gifts he’d received. He grumbled, irritated that he didn’t know who left him his presents. He hadn’t even the slightest clue. At the same time… he didn’t want to ask and make it seem like he cared. 

So he didn’t. 

He stomped his way down stairs, running into the rest of his class. Literally, with neither watching where they were going, Bakugo and Y/N collided harshly. Squeaking, Y/N slipped and almost fell, but thankfully Bakugo’s arm secured her to his chest before she could go down.

“Oh, hi, Bakugo! Thank you!” Y/N L/N. Eighteen years old, rank fifth in the class. Quirk; Glass creation. She could create glass from her body, much like Momo. She was kind, smart, quiet. Easy to work with in teams. 

Actually, she was really cute when he gave her a real once over.

“Yeah, yeah. Whatever. Watch where you’re going, dumbass.” He grumbled, letting her stand up straight.

“I think that’s a two-way road, Bakugo.” She teased, softly.

Bakugo scoffed, pushing past her, knocking her shoulder, albeit softer than he would anyone else, but still. “Whatever.”

“Oh, Bakugo!” She called before he got too far. “Happy birthday!”

Despite the scowl on his lips, his heart smiled, beating a bit faster. Before the flush on his face could expose him, he waved her off and walked off. 

Now, as he stepped into homeroom, he was less annoyed to find another gift wrapped box. This time it sat on his desk and it was flat and maybe just bigger than his hand. He furrowed his eyebrows, he clearly wasn’t the first one in the classroom as other students had already sat in their seats talking or scrolling through their phone.

Bakugo looked around, discreetly, to see if anyone was watching him expectantly, but no one was. He huffed, and gently untied the ribbon and pulled the lid off. ‘Yes, you can wear it inside. Iida shouldn’t bother you about it, Happy Birthday!’ His lip twitched up into a smile, this time the note was handwritten. It was pretty and small, definitely not Kaminari or Kirishima.

Under the note sat a black beanie, an orange explosion was embroidered on the folded lip with ‘Ground Zero’ decorated through the middle of it. By the looks of it, it looked like it was hand sewn, at least from the slight offness of the letters, but it was still well put together. He lifted it to put it on, but paused and looked over to Iida. It only took a moment for Bakugo to catch his eye and Iida simply nodded and went back to his conversation.

Bakugo smirked, they really did talk to Iida about it. Who the hell would go through the trouble to make sure he wouldn’t get bitched at? For some reason, his eyes flickered over to her. Maybe it was because she just stepped into the classroom, or because he kind of wanted the gifter to be her. The world would never know.

He slid the beanie over his hair, watching Y/N just barely make it to her seat before the bell rang. Unable to help himself, he listened into her conversation with Tsu, maybe secretly hoping it was about him. “You were almost late, ribbit.”

“Yeah, I couldn’t get it to fit in my locker.” Y/N whispered, a pout evident in her voice. “This is hard.”

“You’re the one who chose to do it this way. There were much easier ways to go about it, ribbit.” Tsu teased.

“Yeah, yeah. But I’m a pussy, so there’s that.” Y/N rolled her eyes.

“Hey, Baku-Bro. Nice beanie!” Kirishima suddenly dragged Bakugo out of the girl’s conversation.

“Thanks, Shitty Hair. Birthday present.” Bakugo grunted, watching his expression, just in case it was him who gifted him the hat.

“That’s awesome, who gave it to you?” Kirishima’s eyes lit up at the idea of his friend getting a gift.

“Dunno. No name on the box.” He answered, ruling out his best friend. “They just let a note.”

Bakugo handed over the note, not noticing the eyes of a certain someone following his movement. Kirishima looked over it, eyebrows furrowing. He knew the handwriting, he’d seen it somewhere. But where? Then it clicked for him.

Glancing up at Bakugo, who stared out the window, he let his eye shift over to the glass maker. She turned red instantly, knowing she’d been caught. Her eyes widened in panic as Kirishima began speaking again.

“Well, the handwriting is way to nice to be us.” He pointed out, referring to the boys of the Bakusquad. “Mina slants her writing a bit, too. So I don’t think it’s from her. Why don’t you ask Iida, they obviously talked to him, so he should know.”

Kirishima could almost swear he could feel Y/N’s heart beating from his seat. Bakugo grunted and rolled his eyes. “I don’t care, enough. If they want to hide, they can hide.”

That was a lie, but Y/N didn’t know that. All she knew was that she was safe from the embarrassment of him knowing. She glared at Kirishima as he grinned at her and had half the mind to throw her note book at him, but that would cause issues, so she settled for flipping him off.

All she had to do was make it through the rest of the day and she could go back to silently pining. This secret admirer gifting thing was stressful.

 Making it to lunch, Bakugo hadn’t gotten anymore gifts. Which was a bit annoying, but he didn’t dwell on it too much. Or tried to. He expected another gift or two, but nothing, so guessed they were done.

But Uraraka stopping him before he could go buy lunch, changed that thought. “Here you go, Bakugo! Happy Birthday!” She passed him an adorably wrapped bento box.

“Pink cheeks? You’re the one leaving me presents?” He raised an eyebrow.

“Oh, no.” She waved her hands, trying to shoo away the idea. “I’m just the messenger!”

Was it bad that that cleared away his sudden disappointment? “Who the fuck is it then?”

Uraraka grinned. “I am not allowed to disclose that information.”

“I’ll buy you cookies if you tell me.” He tried.

“Nope, she gave me ten boxes of Pockey to swear secrecy.” She beamed before slapping her hands over her mouth.

“She?” Bakugo smirked. “You might as well tell me her name, now.”

Uraraka shook her head and he sighed. “Whatever, tell her I said thanks at least.”

“Enjoy!” She smiled, before running off.

Bakugo rolled his eyes and stalked off to his table and sat down, briefly noting Mina wasn’t around. He looked around to find her sitting with the other girls of 1-A, and they all stared him down. With them all watching, it was hard to tell which one gave him lunch. He looked away from them to open his lunch.

It was charbroiled chicken with a side of cucumber, crab sticks, macaroni salad, and white rice. He could immediately smell the spice wafting off the chicken, they really put work into it.

“Woah, that looks really good, Bakugo!” Denki complimented, already salivating.

Bakugo quickly raised a threatening fist, as he looked over the note in the lid. “Touch it and I’ll blow you up.”

‘Spicy chicken for the Spicy Explosion Boy? Happy Birthday!’ This one also was handwritten.

“Don’t take it personal, he’s just protective over his birthday gifts.” Kirishima teased. “From the secret gifter.”

“Oh, a mysterious sender on your birthday? Do they know you hate celebrating your birthday, or?” Sero commented, laughing.

“I don’t know.” Bakugo grumbled, taking a bite of his lunch. “And I don’t hate it.”

“You figure out who’s leaving them?” Kirishima asked.

“They’re a she. Pink cheeks gave me the box and said she bribed her into silence.” Bakugo answered.

“So a girl. That’s not Uraraka.” Sero piped. “Momo?”

“I don’t think she likes Bakugo enough to put this much energy into his birthday. Plus, her handwriting is too different from this girl’s.” Kirishima offered.

“Mina?” Denki tried.

“Doubt it, she would give these gifts to him herself. Also she can’t wrap presents for shit. Remember Christmas?” Kirishima said, munching on his own lunch.

“Jirou? I got drumsticks this morning.” Bakugo admitted, although he knew it wasn’t her.

“Nah, pretty sure she’d drown you if she got the chance. Not make you lunch.” Kirishima shrugged, absentmindedly looking at the girls who had moved onto their own devices. “Maybe it’s Y/N. She always gives people a bunch of birthday presents. Tsu got like twenty on her birthday.”

“I don’t talk to Y/N.” Bakugo hurriedly pushed the idea away.

“You barely talk to any of them, dude.” Denki reminded, laughing. “So it could be Y/N.”

Bakugo grunted, ignoring the comment, trying to feign indifference, but he subtly turned his gaze into the giggling girls, zoning in on the one in question. He did sort of want it to be her leaving him gifts.

He toyed with the thought for the rest of lunch, her going through all the work to get him gifts, wrapping them and giving him notes? The idea brought a light feeling to his chest. But was it a plausible thought?

Would Y/N really waste the time on an asshole like him?

Probably not, he decided, pushing the thought to the back of his mind.

Later on, gathered in the living room some of the 1-A students tried to work through their homework while the others idly played on their phones. Bakugo sat staring at his textbook, working through who his gifter was, but he couldn’t get past the want for it be Y/N. So really, he was just thinking about her for the last two hours.

“Guys, I made cupcakes!” Speak of the devil. Y/N set out cutely iced, chocolate cupcakes with basic white icing, nothing too special.

Reaching to grab one, Bakugo’s hand was intercepted, by different cupcake “Wait! This one’s for you.” She handed him an orange iced cupcake with a small candle in the middle. “A birthday cupcake!”

A birthday cupcake? He blinked at it and then up at her. He hadn’t had any sort of cake since the one he exploded. Thankfully, everyone else was too caught up in snagging a regular cupcake for themselves to noticed how dumbstruck he was.

“Uh, sorry about the plate, I thought it was a cute idea at the time, but then I realized what the heck are you going to use it for after this.” He looked down to look at his plating. It was a small tea plate, shaped as an explosion. “So, you don’t have to keep it if you don’t want to, you can even toss it out the window right now if you want to, I-.”

“Thank you, for the cupcake and the plate. I think I’ll keep it.” He cut her rambling off.

“You’re, um, you’re welcome. I’m glad you like it.” Bakugo felt prideful, knowing that the soft smile she presented was for him.

There was that stupid hopeful thought again. Maybe he could just ask her, would she tell the truth? How disappointed would he be if it turned out not to be her? Too disappointed, but still he opened his mouth to ask anyway.

“Did-?” He started only get interrupted by Denki.

“Hey, wanna play your new game a bit before we go to bed?” Denki asked through a mouthful of cake. Yeah, he received another present in his last class; the new Mario Party game.

“Pikachu, don’t talk with your mouth full, fucking gross.” Bakugo snapped. “And no, not if you didn’t finish your homework!”

“But I did!” Denki waved his worksheet around. “See!”

Bakugo snatched the paper from the kid and looked over it, he dully noted that Y/N and retreated away. But his courage to ask her was faded now, so it didn’t matter anyway. What did matter; “Number nine is wrong. Correct it while I go grab my controller.”

He handed the paper back and stomped up to his room. While, this birthday had been better than the last several, he somehow still ended up dissatisfied at the end of the day. He’d gotten a crap ton of gifts and yet he hadn’t gotten the one thing he just realized he actually wanted.

Fucking stupid.

“Bakugo?” A voice pulled him out of his thoughts, and he looked up to see Y/N. “You okay?”

“Yeah, just thinking about shit.” He shrugged.

“Well, don’t think about things that’ll make you upset it’s your birthday!” She tried, cheerfully.

He scoffed. “Yeah, that’s the shit I’m thinking about.”

Y/N furrowed her brows at the statement. “Did you not like your presents?”

“No, I do. I guess. I just didn’t get the one I really wanted.” He huffed, vaguely.

He missed the slightly saddened look she eyed him with before her next sentence. “Well, hopefully you’ll like the next one!”

With that she skipped past him, leaving him to continue his trek to his room. Unless, the next gift she left him was Y/N herself, it wouldn’t make him feel better. And looking at the relatively large box left at his door, it wasn’t Y/N.

Still, he picked it up, surprised by the weight it held. He set the box on his chair and briefly read the note ribboned to the top advising him that it was fragile. Intrigued he pulled the top off and grabbed the note from inside.

‘Sorry, this is the last one I promise! I put a lot into this one, I hope you like it. Happy Birthday, I hope it was a good one.’ Sadly, this one was typed out. He liked her handwriting better.

Under the note, surrounded by a mass amount of tissue paper was a thick rectangle of glass, in what looked like a picture frame. Pulling it out completely, he found it had a cord attached. Confused, he set the glass on his desk and plugged it in.

Suddenly the glass came to life, a bright light shining up from the bottom illuminating the picture in the middle. A picture of him, actually. He was posed leaping forwards, his right hand raised and an explosion began to form. At the top of the glass words were etched ‘Ground Zero’ and then below his pictured body ‘#1 Hero’.

“Damn right, I am.” It was like one of the 3D picture crystals you saw at the mall, but bigger. “Wish I knew who you were.”

He clicked off the lights and grabbed his controller. Starting out of the room, he looked down at his controller. It took a few steps for a thought to blossom. Tsu and Uraraka had custom controller, both birthday presents, from one person. The same person who vowed to get everyone their own controller eventually. The same person who would give a person a hundred gifts if she could. The same person who literally had a quirk to create his latest gift in her bedroom…

The same person he’d been thinking about all fucking day.

“Son of a bitch.” Bakugo rushed down the stairs, practically running back to the living room, hoping she hadn’t gone to hang out in one of the girls’s rooms.

“There you are, Bakugo, thought you had ditched us.” Kirishima started to joke, but he was ignored as his friend zeroed in on Y/N who had set down a bowl of chips on the table.

She yelped as Bakugo snagged her wrist, spinning her around. “Bakugo, what ar-?”

“The last one was great, really. But still not what I want.” He declared.

Her face burned, she was caught. But she didn’t feel like he was going to kill her, so she took a chance. “Wh-what do you want?”

He grinned and leaned forwards, pressing his lips to hers. They didn’t hear the class gasp and cheer around them. They fell into their own world of each other, only returning to reality when air was needed. The moment lasted though, their eyes still locked, foreheads sweetly pressed together.

“Oh, here!” Y/N stepped away grabbing something off the table. One of the stick bows that was attached to a present box he left on the table, she turned back to him as she stuck it to her shirt. “Happy birthday!”

Bakugo laughed and pulled her back to his chest, kissing her forehead. “Yeah, happy birthday to me.”

[anika-ann]

Nothing but the Truth - Pt.7

The Break-up

Pairing: Steve Rogers x reader        Word count: 3160

Summary: A fake dating AU.  The chapter title sums it up the best. Steve messed up. Enter Sam Wilson and the door to Steve’s office: a saga… and Sam being the best bro.

Warnings: a lot of swearing, light angst, mild threats of violence, mentions of PTSD, references to last chapter (violence, torture), bro talk

Story Masterlist

For the second time in a week, Sam Wilson was on the mission to break Steve Rogers’ face; or, at least, to bruise it.

Then again, the supersoldier serum’s ability to regenerate cells was about as big as Sam’s irritation, so he might as well try the former anyway.

He had specifically told Steve not to do that and there he was, that motherfu- leaving his best girl-friend in tears; momentarily, his only best friend, because goddammit STEVE!

Steve Rogers just had to go and fuck up the thing that was bound to be fucked up – on a whole new scale, no less.

Sam burst into Steve’s office with zero regard to the poor door, an angry snarl on his lips.

“What the hell is wrong with you, man?!” Sam raved, hands balled in fists, ready, halfway raised by his sides.

“Listed alphabetically or chronologically?” Steve muttered under his breath and sighed at the sight of his fuming friend, not bothering to stand up from his position in the chair. “What is it, Sam?”

‘What is it?’ Sam’s brain mimicked in mockery and anger. WHAT IS IT?!

Was he serious or was he only pretending to be so dumb?!

“She’s awake for two days now-”

“I know,” Steve stated calmly, a stark contrast to Sam’s boiling rage. It only irked the pararescue more, especially since he could tell there was a barely visible wall built up in Steve’s mind, his true emotions locked in and the key to them thrown away. “Is she not healing properly? Is there something wrong?”

“Hell yeah it is! Its name is Steve Rogers,” Sam spitted out venomously.

To his great annoyance, he could feel himself slip into a therapist mode when Steve sighed and lowered his gaze shamefully; the shift in Sam’s attitude was only minute, yet essential. A change great just enough not to punch Steve yet. Momentarily, Sam hated that part of himself, because the need to approach Steve carefully and to get him open up was in a merciless battle with the instinct to protect his other friend hence socking Steve in his jaw. The inner turmoil only fed Sam’s irritation.

“She’ll be fine! That’s not what I’m worried about, dammit! She’s confused and fucking sad. Apparently, a guy told her he loved her – a forced confession, but whatever – and then never showed up to say hi even.”

Sam’s words were only met with silence; partly guilt-driven, partly stunned, partly because Steve probably had no clue what to say to his defence.

The image of one of the best women Sam had ever met, glassy eyes and short breaths as she had clearly been swallowing up the sobs of sorrow and confusion with a lovely mixture of brewing PTSD popped up in Sam’s head and as if he snapped his fingers, his anger was back. He himself had been a picture of misery, when she had told him about everything that happened.

She had told him everything, because she believed he would have a better insight into Steve’s baffling behaviour, a better idea of whether he had lied when he had admitted that he loved her.

Sam had refused to give her a satisfying answer, mostly because he wanted to give Steve a black eye for ghosting her like a coward. He had simply claimed that it was not his place to say and that Steve had been busy these days; which he was. She didn’t need to know what he was busy with.

“I was there,” Steve remarked shyly, at least having the decency to sound as if he was aware that he was being an idiot.

Good.

Well, not good, but a good start, something Sam could possibly work with.

Still, he couldn’t but roll his eyes at the poor argument made.

“Yeah, when she was asleep,” Sam fired back, crossing his arms on his chest. “That doesn’t really count. Not even when you fall asleep in that chair, waiting for her to wake up. You need to actually talk to her, Steve.”

“About what?”

Sam honestly couldn’t believe this guy. He could sense the irritation rising in the other man as well; his frustration with Sam’s inability to let this go.

Sam hoped it was frustration with his own actions too.

“About how you feel, you dumbass!” Sam spitted out, unhooking his arms in favour of throwing his hands up. “Hell, about anything, just go and stop ignoring her!”

Steve jolted to his feet so quickly he actually managed to startle Sam, enough to make his instincts to kick in-- and die as fast as when Steve leaned onto the table, not throwing punches.

“What’s your problem, Sam?! First you don’t want me near her and now you’re basically forcing me on her? Make up your goddamn mind!” Steve sputtered.

“Oh, please! Like my mind would ever stop you from doing anything! You promised me not to break her heart!”

Which was exactly what Steve was doing at the moment. Breaking her heart, leaving her doubting despite having confessed his feelings to a fucking polygraph; breaking her heart, because, for whatever reason, the blond dumbass was refusing to go see her or even contact her anyhow.

Sam’s heart was beating wildly in his chest as his brows knitted together when examining the other soldier.

Damn, he should have expected this outburst of his, he knew Steve was bottling things up and he could be a small (fucking big) ball of rage. Just like Sam guessed the reasoning behind Steve’s dumbassery and found it… partly justified, but stupid.

When his—friend looked away and visibly gulped, standing straight again except his hunched shoulders, Sam had his theory confirmed.

Sam had really been hoping this could have been solved by a fist-fight, he was, in fact, itching for it. It seemed that talking would have to do.

Thought he wouldn’t dismiss the punching just yet.

Sam sighed, eyeing the other man. “You already said yes, Steve. Why are you sitting on your ass here instead of letting her admit her feelings to you too and have your happily ever after?”

The supersoldier shook his head inconspicuously and slowly seated himself back into the safety of his leather chair.

“I can’t, Sam. I--I just can’t,“ he whispered hoarsely, opening the door to his heart an inch, enough for Sam to unwillingly and yet very much eagerly slip his fingers in and take a look.

He dropped to the opposite chair, knowing that the table was what Steve needed between them; a barrier.

For some people, it would be one of the things discouraging them from talking, denying them the feeling of connection with the therapist. For Steve Rogers, who kept the matters of heart close to his chest unless it was something which was pissing him off, it was the only thing that actually got him talking.

“What the fuck are you talking about?” Sam sighed, already piecing an image in his head.

Silence was the only answer he got, heaviness falling on the pair of soldiers. Sam waited. He knew Steve needed to talk to someone about it, but he needed to start on his own, rather than answering specific questions.

Adding another barrier to protect himself, Steve rested his forearms at the edge of the table, fingers interlaced, fingers visibly tensing and relaxing several times as he fought to shape his thoughts and emotions. His gaze was fixated on his hands, absent.

When he finally spoke up, his voice was quiet, barely a whisper with a rough edge to it.

“The moment I saw her strapped to that chair—it’s… there are no words for it. And I couldn’t do a thing about it and it was just--- you weren’t there, Sam. I know that-“ Steve gulped nervously, his voice breath hitching. “I know you read the report. You saw her after, but—you weren’t there. Not when I lied and she got— she got-”

It was Sam’s turn to swallow nothing, the image of his friend being fucking tortured engraved in his mind vivid, his brain supplying him with what he had learned about her and what he had seen happening to other people.

His stomach clenched painfully, his jaw set tight. Yet, he let Steve speak, let him get it out of his chest, because he doubted that Steve told this to anyone. He had written a report, yes, Sam had read it, yes, but seeing it… yeah, Sam had an idea of what a toll it had had to take on Steve.

The blond’s eyes slid shut as he released a shaky breath. “I honestly thought he was going to kill her. I never—the way she screamed, Sam, I- I’ll never be able to unhear that.”

Sam felt his fist clench and unclench on their own account, an involuntary reaction to the imaginary punch to his gut. He had imagined tears-- and now her screams echoed in his ears, a picture vivid despite not having any memory of it.

“Yeah, I fucking bet,” he retorted as his own reaction to the horror image took over, visceral, nausea tickled his stomach unpleasantly. “What’s your point?”

“You were right. I think I could have stopped Tony and Natasha if I really wanted – but the opportunity was just too tempting. And I fucked up. Big time.”

Swallowing his anger and ignoring the chill that was still running up and down his spine, Sam focused on the other man, recalling precisely when and how he had fed Steve’s guilt; misplaced at least partly.

“Steve, man, look-“

He did. Steve raised his haunted eyes to Sam, mad guilt pooling in them along with reflection of tears not spilled.

How could Sam not soften at that, how could he not let the need to comfort Steve win? More so when he continued, every word strangled as if he had trouble to even push it through the lump in his throat, yet they kept spilling, rapid fire of randomly voiced thoughts.

“I did that to her. Maybe not directly, but she was in that chair because of me. She was- she was in so much pain because of me. Because I couldn’t protect her, because I let myself- I let myself believe that we could be together, fake or for real, Avengers or not, but that’s not how this works. I can’t be with her, Sam. I can’t do that to her. She doesn’t deserve-“

“-an ounce of love?” Sam interrupted his guilt-trip. “A guy who loves her and wants to protect her so bad that he’s beating himself over something that wasn’t quite in his control? I know what I said, man, but… shit, I was pissed. I didn’t mean it, not really.”

“Sam-“

Sam stopped him before he could continue torturing himself; it was his own time to confess.

“Steve, you’re the first guy I ever considered to be good enough for her. And I don’t give my approval easily, trust me.”

Steve averted his gaze at that, eyeing his desk as he shook his head.

“Doesn’t matter. You said it yourself; your opinion might mean a lot to me, but I made up my mind…. I’m staying away. I already talked to Fury about future missions, looks like they need someone for a long-term undercover in Alaska.”

Blood froze in Sam’s veins, his brain short-circuiting.

His friend was going to do what?

“You wanna run that by me again?”

Steve shrugged, clearly aiming for a casual tone and missing epically.

“Apparently I’d make a great lumberjack. Let me grow a beard, dress me in flannel and I guarantee you no one will recognize me. Fury’s words, not mine. I think he has a point.”

Sam stayed silent for a few moments, his mind racing a mile a minute. This was even wrse than he had thought.

Not only Steve was hiding; he was about to silently disappear, without even a word goodbye, he suspected.

Sam didn’t know whether he should yell in frustration, punch the other man or bang his head against a wall.

He settled for trying to reason with Steve, a bold move considering how impulsive the man could be.

“I didn’t take you for a coward, Steve. I didn’t take you for the guy who walks away when faced with a problem.”

“I’m not,” Steve replied simply, tilting his head but not meeting Sam’s eye. “This isn’t it. I’m not. It’s for the best.”

“Please. Not even you believe that.”

Steve had nothing to say to that; probably because Sam was right and Steve was bullshitting both of them. Sam leaned onto the backrest of his chair, narrowing his eyes as he wandered just how to find a way out of this, how to convince his friend to stay, how to… how to approach that whole mess.

See? That’s what happens when you agree to fake date to catch a serial killer. That is, unless you actually die in the process.

“I think you’re afraid,” Sam started in the end, fighting a smirk when Steve blinked, clearly not expecting to hear that, not expecting Sam to read him so well. And Sam was pretty confident that he was right, okay. “I think that you’re afraid that you might fall for her further. That as much as you were already willing to die for her before, that little time you had together made you willing to live for her and that’s much scarier, because living is harder.”

He let his mind wander, sharing every thought as they ran by; and Steve didn’t dare to speak, his gaze falling back to the desk.

“I think that down there in that freaky dungeon, you had her life in your hands and that freaked the shit out of you-- which, not that I can blame you. I think that you’re scared that at the same time, she had your life in her hands as well, not aware how much of it she had, how much she meant to you. And now she knows-- well, she hopes, her belief is pretty shaken since you’ve been ghosting her.”

Steve had the decency to look up and appear guilty when Sam gave him a firm glare, still having nothing to say to defend himself; it seemed Sam truly was on the right track. Good. Now he could make his point.

“I think that you’re afraid of the power she holds over you and it doesn’t matter how many times I tell you she loves you too, because I think you figured that much already. This isn’t about you worrying about her returning your feelings, is it? You’re just scared that she has you in her pocket and that’s perfectly normal. But, Steve… I think we both know that there is not one person you’ve ever met that you can trust to use that power as wisely as she would.” He barely covered the smirk on his face at the final blow he was about to deliver. “That is, if you weren’t a chicken and paid her a visit before one of the doctors flirting with her realizes that the whole relationship was a cover and their path is in fact clear.”

“What doctors?” Steve asked distractedly, his head snapping up, Sam’s words working like a charm.

Yeah, Sam could not believe this man. The audacity of him. The ignorance.

He still loved him, okay, he was like a brother at this point, but goddammit Steven!

“Is that what you took from my whole speech?” Sam mocked offence, amusement dancing in his eyes.

“What. Doctors?”

Sam shrugged lightheartedly, pretending not to be bothered by a single thing in the world.

“Pretty much every single one of them. You know how she is, way too nice to everyone, giving them the wrong impression… but honestly, Laufeys is-“

Sam never got to finish his sentence. Steve got to his feet with a huff, striding from the office with determined steps, now having a mission on his own.

Sam’s mission was hopefully done here; and he hadn’t even had to lie much.

Laufeys was a guy who flirted with everything that moved. He also slept with everything that moved and was willing to submit, which was nearly everyone, because that guy had a silver tongue that got him just about everywhere; most of all, it got his dick everywhere.

He hadn’t dared to flirt with Captain’s fiancé though; not that Steve needed to know that. A slow victorious smirk spread on the Sam’s face.

He was still in the office, satisfied with himself and praying for the best, when Tony Stark spoke from the ceiling.

“Nice move, Birdbrain. Nice move.”

Just hearing the cocky voice of the billionaire dragged Sam’s mood down. He eyed the speakers, irked.

“Fuck you, Stark, I don’t want to hear your voice,” he snarled, heat boiling in his chest. “I’m still pissed as hell that you sent those reporters to take a picture of them in the first place, hell, that you hired a guy and got her burned. And forced them into that mess. I figured that since the damage is already done, I might fix some of it a least.”

There was a meaningful pause following Sam’s outburst.

“From the two of them, she was the first to say yes, Samuel, just saying. They were dancing around each other for way too long. Now they won’t and we caught a bad guy. Win-win.”

“Except that she’s still in the med bay, Canman,” Sam hissed, ignoring the pang in his chest at that. They thought she was going to be alright, no lasting damage to her heart or brain, but still. Seeing her in the hospital bed was awful, yet nothing compared to the sight he had been offered when they had all come to the rescue. “Get out of my sight before I give you a matching black eye…”

Sam Wilson was not proud of giving Tony Stark a black eye. He had wanted to give him a broken nose, broken jaw and maybe some more, but the stupid Ironman suits prevented it, so only one black eye it was.

“Mr.Stark wishes to inform you he wasn’t in your sight, only in your hearing range,” the AI spoke this time and Sam rubbed his eyes, suddenly bone-tired.

He rubbed a hand down his face then and sighed. “Funhouse. I live in a fucking funhouse…”

And he did indeed. The residents were all kinds of crazy, there was a huge-ass ‘A’ on the top of the building—a building which was a Tower for god’s sake and everything was ran by an AI--

Sam was not proud of his next words either, but if Tony Stark was being a privacy-invading bastard, so could Sam.

For a bit.

“Friday? Let me know when Cap spills the beans and how it goes, okay?” he called out lowly, instantly receiving a response.

“As you wish, Mr. Wilson.“

Part 8 (final)

Tags: @mermaidxatxheart​ @bobertswagert​ @kakakatey​ @ccolz88-blog​ @joeyrumlow​ @lovemeterwrites​ @jessyballet​ @bellaireland1981​

[tanzaniiite]

the one that got away // kaminari x reader

requests: OPEN

warnings: nsfw-ish. oh no! i spilled all the angst! oh, cursing.

word count: 1,890

song inspo: “The One That Got Away” by Katy Perry, yup it’s a song fic

a/n: fun fact; i use to hate song fics, now i love them lol. also (F/L/N) = first letter of name

summer after high school, when we first met

Kaminari stared at you in awe as you expertly balanced several plates on both arms. “Careful Denki, you might slobber all over the menu" Sero joked, as he watched his friend drool over the new waitress. The blonde snapped out of his daze and glared slightly at the goofball in front of him. “Shut up dude. Look at her, she’s gorgeous!” He exclaimed, turning around to find you again. Sero rolled his eyes, “Bro, you say that about every girl. Plus you’re a hero now, you have a reputation to keep up” He lightly scolded, shaking his head. Kaminari groaned, “Ugh, you sound like Aizawa” He stated, still watching you take other people’s orders. The raven-haired man laughed, “I can see the tabloids now: New hero.. horny as fuck!” He joked. Kaminari turned back to his best friend, “Shut. Up.” He seethed, full-on glaring now. Sero blinked before laughing loudly, “Was I suppose to take that baby glare seriously?!” He asked rhetorically, his laughter now roaring throughout the diner. You turned to see where all the commotion was coming from and smiled slightly, ‘They seem interesting’ You thought, making your way to their table.

“Hello I’m Y/n, I’ll be serving you today. Can I start you boys off with some drinks?”

we make-out in your mustang to Radiohead

You straddle Kaminari and grind against him slightly as you kiss his neck and leave serval marks for the world to see. The blonde underneath you groans in pleasure as his hands go under your shirt and squeeze your chest. You let out a breathy laugh, “You’re such a pervert” You joke, pulling away to look at your boyfriend. Kaminari grinned at you, “But I’m your pervert- wait no. I’m not a pervert” He stated, trying to fix his mistake. You laughed loudly, leaning your weight onto him in the process, “I’m joking babe!” You said, still laughing and he started laughing with you. You guys were still in the early stages of your relationship, so you were both feeling your way around. Your laughter slowed into giggles as you pushed his bangs out of his face and cupped his cheeks. “God you’re so cute,” You said, squishing his cheeks together and pecking his lips. “What? Don’t you find me sexy? Irresistible?” He asked, pouting slightly. You giggled some more, “Of course I do. I just.. I don’t know how I got so lucky” You sighed, smiling slightly. Kaminari shook his head, “No, I’m the lucky one. I basically won the lotto” He stated.

and on my eighteenth birthday, we got matching tattoos

“Oh my god Denki, you’re such a baby. They didn’t even start yet” You teased, looking at your boyfriend, who was already bawling his eyes out. Kaminari whipped his head to look at you, “I’m afraid of needles! You know this!” He cried, tensing as the tattoo artist approached him. “Babe, you’re only getting an (F/L/N). See I already got my K” You explained, holding up your wrist. “I’m sorry, I can’t. I feel like I’m gonna pass out” He stated, pushing his hair back. You roll your eyes playfully, “Okay okay my big baby, a permeant marker will have to do” You said, getting up from the chair and kissing his forehead gingerly. “Please never take me to a place with needles ever again” The blonde begged, holding your hand and kissing it repeatedly. You chuckled and caressed his cheek, “Oh baby.. you have a doctor’s appointment next week” You said, breaking the news as lightly as possible. You felt bad for laughing as Kaminari’s face turned into a horrified expression.

used to steal your parent’s liquor and climb on the roof, talk about the future like we had a clue

“So, do you think you’ll make it to the top ten Pro-Hero list?” You asked, your head on Kaminari’s shoulder as you both watched the sunset slowly. The blonde shrugged, “Once upon a time, I thought I would but.. I’m not as good as Deku, Shoto, Ground-Zero, etc. I’m just happy to be a Pro-Hero y’know?” He stated, looking at the neighborhood kids playing tag. You nodded slightly, “Well if it matters, you’ll always be my number one hero,” You said, grazing your thumb over his knuckles. Kaminari paused and looked at you, “Really?” He whispered. Your face immediately heated up, “Oh my god, that was so cheesy. I’m sorry” You apologized, as you took a huge swig of beer. Your boyfriend laughed slightly, “No no, it’s cheesy don’t get me wrong. But I like cheesy” He said, kissing your nose, laughing again when your face scrunched up. You blushed more, staring intently at the roof tiles of your house, “Whatever man” You mumbled. Kaminari kissed your cheek and whispered in your ear, “If I had to be anyone’s hero, I’m glad I’m yours”.

never planned that one day i’d be losing you

Distance. That’s what was growing between you and your goofball of a boyfriend. The honeymoon stage was officially over, you thought it would never end given that you guys have been together for a solid year and a half. But the crime rate was increasing and with that so was Kaminari’s workload. You understood that a hero’s work never really stopped but he has vacation days, why wouldn’t he use them? You knew he just wanted to help, to feel useful but you felt useless. You felt like you were just an object in his life, he comes home to your shared apartment so late, every day. And every day you wait for him, worried sick that a villain might do more than just rough him up. And what do you get in return? A simple “Hey babe” or a light peck to the cheek.

You don’t mean to be ungrateful but would it kill him to take a day or two off. One day to rest and the other day to spend time with you. It didn’t feel like you were living with him, you practically lived by yourself. He came home late in the night just to leave again in the wee hours of the morning. And this is frustrating, you were frustrated. This leads to fights that never seemed to end. You tried explaining to him how you felt and how he shouldn’t work himself to the brink of exhaustion. Does he listen? No. Instead, he brushes you off, calls you clingy and needy. Ha! As if he wasn’t the one begging you for a quickie in the morning right before he left for the whole day.

To put it simply; you just couldn’t take it anymore.

“Y/n… what are you doing?” Kaminari asked as he walked into your guy’s bedroom. “Packing.” You answered sharply, shoving a bunch of clothes into a small suitcase. “Why? Did you plan a trip? I can’t go, you know my workload-“ He started. “Is heavy. I know” You replied, curling your fists ever so slightly. “And this is not a trip, I’m going to stay with a friend for a while,” You said, zipping the suitcase and taking it off the bed. “What for?” The blonde asked. You grit your teeth, could he be any more of an idiot? But god, did you love this idiot. “I don’t know Kaminari, you tell me,” You said, finally facing him and crossing your arms. He flinched slightly at the use of his last name, “Um, I don’t know babe” He said, turning around to take off his hero costume.

You bit your tongue, to stop yourself from saying something harsh. “We barely spend any time together. You come home so late and leave so early, I might as well live by myself at this point. You clearly don’t take my feelings into consideration given the fact that you haven’t taken a day off in down there a year-“ You rambled, combing your fingers through your hair as you walked around the room. “Babe. You know what I do for a living, I can’t just take a day off. That’s not how it works” The blonde stated, looking at you. You laughed bitterly, “That’s exactly how it works. You’re not the only Pro-Hero Denki, the world won’t fall apart if you take a day off” You explained. Kaminari stared at you for a bit before shaking his head and resuming to take off his costume. “See? This is the shit I’m talking about, you’re not listening to me” You say, glaring at him.

“I am listening to you. But you’re not making sense, you knew what I did way before we started dating. This isn’t something I just sprung onto you out of nowhere. You know this” He said plainly, before changing into pajamas and walking into the bathroom. You followed him, “I understand what you do and why you do it. What I don’t understand is the harm of you taking a day off to tend to yourself? To tend to me?” You asked. The blonde rolled his eyes, something he rarely did, he was getting annoyed. “You have friends, if you want attention, hang out with them” He replied, picking up his toothbrush. “I can spend time with my friends forever. But they’re not you, Denki” You whispered, as tears stung your eyes. You were tired, so tired. All you wanted was to spend time with him, just one day. Was that really too much to ask for?

in another life, i would make you stay

You tried, you honestly tried. You loved this man so much, it hurt. But it hurt more that he didn’t seem to care. So you left, and in the back of your head, you hoped that he would chase after you. Try and stop you. Tell you that you were making a mistake, that he would change his ways if it meant that you stayed. And if he did any of that, you would’ve stayed. Because it would show that he cared. But he didn’t do any of that, not a single thing. He let you go, he let you walk out the door without putting up a fight. The blonde figured you were upset and wanted to give you space, he didn’t want to add fuel to the fire.

so i don’t have to say you were the one that got away

He wanted to give you time to cool off before he approached you. Too bad he didn’t get the chance to approach you again. There he sat, on the kitchen floor, reading a letter he thought was a figment of his imagination. Kaminari reread the letter over and over but no matter how many times he read it, the words never changed. You left. Yes, you were upset but you weren’t leaving to blow off steam, you were leaving for good. How could he be so stupid? The blonde covered his mouth as he choked back a sob, he was going to take off. He was going to spend a whole week with you, just you and nobody else. Kaminari saw the error in his ways and was trying to fix it by saving vacation days and picking up extra patrols. Just so he could take off a full consecutive week off. Damn, only if you had held out a little longer. Maybe, just maybe, you wouldn’t have been…

the one that got away

[veilofher]

MDZS Meta: Why did Lan WangJi live on?

Guys. Guys.

Lan WangJi. Loves. Wei WuXian.

Period.

If you’ve read Mo Dao Zu Shi / Grandmaster of Demonic Cultivation, then you know this is a hard fact.

Like attack his own family just to try and protect him for a bit longer and bear 33 scars on his back for it kind of love.

Like break the very rules he so strictly upholds, and stash his favorite alcohol- Emperor’s Smile in his house kind of love.

Like adopt a baby he loved kind of love (which if any of you know, taking responsibility of babies aren’t exactly the easiest thing to do, we’re talking a minimum of 16 years here guys).

So that got me thinking, if LWJ loved WWX so very very much, so much so that one of the very first descriptions of him, as said so eloquently by WWX, was “nothing could help the bitter facial expression that made him look as though his wife had passed away“, then why did he not just take his own life? Or at the very least become as nonfunctional a person as his father who was mourning his wife.

Because can you blame the man? The love of his life, who was probably the best person he knew, okay no probably about it, had been viciously villianized for his strength and then brutally murdered for his choices- choices that LWJ himself agreed with.

I mean just look at the family history of the Lans, those bloody suckers just feel too damn much.

And God knows the Lan sect wouldn’t have stopped him. Be grudged him? Yes. Hated on WWX more than they already were? Definitely. Used him as an example of how not to love? That’s a given. But stop him? I don’t think so. I mean just look at what they did with his father- Qingheng Jun. They left the man alone, to do whatever the fuck he wanted, in the name of love. And they let LWJ, who was so heavily injured that he needed three years to recover, just leave and go to the Burial Mounds merely three months after said injury. They did not even try to stop him or follow after him to make sure he was alright. They just let him do as he wanted, now that his punishment was complete.

Side note: The Lans really do allow a lot in the name of love, don’t they?

So yes, LWJ could’ve very easily ended his life, and not suffered through the next thirteen years of grief, which in his case was kind of tripled, because not only did the love of his life die, the world just blindly hated on said love, and everyone also kind of thought his soul was destroyed. Actually fuck triple grief, make it x100 fold.

But did he do that?

No.

What did he do?

He followed the principle he shared with WWX, one that WWX died to uphold- always be there for others regardless of the fame it brings / always be where the chaos is. And this is something they both have done all their lives, think LWJ protecting Mian Mian despite having a broken leg, and WWX protecting the Wen sect remnants despite the infamy if brought him.

This man, who cherished every part of WWX that he had left behind, so desperately, how could he just take his own life when WWX himself hadn’t?

I mean think of the absolutely pain and horror of the last couple of years of WWX’s life- he was one of the best cultivators of his generation who lost his core days after he lost his sect and his father-figure, then was stabbed by his own sword and thrown into hell on earth, aka The Burial Mounds, then was thrusted into a war when he was barely out of his teens, where he was reduced to a weapon by his own brother (and you cannot say anything to make me think otherwise. Jiang Cheng had the front seat view to his brother’s misery, and he did nothing. LWJ, who barely interacted with the man knew that his spiritual powers were somehow impaired, but JC, who lived with him, had zero clue? Bro do you even see your brother?), and then just when the dust was settling, and he could finally begin to psychologically heal, he took the Wen sect remnants under his wing, for which he was villainized by the entire world and it’s mother, and pretty much everything went downhill from there.

And despite all that, not once does WWX think of committing suicide. After Qionqi Path and Jin ZiXuan, he would’ve surrendered himself, I think, had he been able to secure the Wen remnants’ safety. And then after the Nightless City Massacre, and Jiang YanLi’s death, he still doesn’t kill himself, as most people in his situation probably would do, because imagine the fucking guilt of having murdered the very sister you loved more than anything. Instead he finds a way to destroy the Stygian Tiger Seal, and dies from a backlash.

LWJ was one of the few people who saw and perhaps the only one who understood WWX even in the midst of his madness. So how could he, knowing all that, just kill himself? What was his pain of losing one loved one compared to the pain of WWX’s, who had lost pretty much everyone?

So instead what does Lan WangJi do?

He lets go of the wordly affairs, and just leaves. He can’t leave his sect, because his brother and uncle and A-Yuan are still there, but he doesn’t even stay really. He’s just on the road, going from place to place, and protecting people. And teaching kids, so that they don’t end up as close minded as his and his previous generation were.

He’s doing the only thing he could do-

Live on and protect Wei WuXian’s values.

[ificouldau]

Section 1 - Chapter 4

50% of you chose to run for the cable car.

50% of you chose to hide and wait.

The boys stand around you anxiously, waiting for an answer. Part of you wants to back into the forest and hide, but part of you wants to run before it’s too late. Shit… you don’t know. You can’t decide.

“Great, so nobody here knows what to do?” Hoshi is kind enough to address the whole group, instead of targeting you alone.

“What did I say? Why should she be in charge of us? We don’t even know her.” The tall one with narrow eyes isn’t as gentle as Hoshi, and targets you directly. They both glance up at you in disappointment, then back at the cloaked man as he walks even closer.Your head feels so heavy, just lifting it feels impossible. Why couldn’t you just choose?

“I told you we should’ve hid, but don’t blame one person for all of this...” Seokmin seems to be the only one backing you up, which does nothing but make you feel even guiltier.

The shorter one sighs, staring in frustration down at the ground. “We shouldn’t have trusted her with that big of a choice.”

“Jihoon, come on. Didn’t you say she saved you and Mingyu earlier?”

“Well, maybe I was wrong about her.”

( -1 Reputation: DK, Woozi )

With your head hung nervously, you don’t notice the sound of rhythmic footsteps heading your way. Everyone is lost in the heat of the argument, and nobody has any time to react before the cloaked stranger turns into the patch of trees you all stand in. You still can’t see his face, but the scar across the back of his hand is much more visible as he grips the knife tighter. Hoshi gasps and stumbles backwards, but you can hardly look up by the time the man makes a move. He stretches his empty hand out towards Joshua and Seokmin, grabbing at the unconscious boy’s shirt between them. “H-”

Before you can even blink, a fist emerges out of the corner of your eye, headed straight towards the cloaked stranger’s torso. As Soonyoung’s knuckles meet the man’s chest, his fist loosens around Vernon’s shirt collar, causing both Seokmin and Joshua to lose their grip as well. Vernon’s limp body hits the snow, and so does the cloaked man’s. As the stranger falls, his hand finally lets go of his bloody knife, skimming Soonyoung’s forearm on the way down. The injured boy stumbles backwards again, wincing in pain at the blood now dripping down towards his fingers.

( -1 Health: Vernon, Hoshi )

You don’t have any time to process the scene before you feel a hand push you towards the direction of the cable car.

Joshua stands behind you, urging you to move. “Hurry!”

All at once, your group takes off running. Joshua moves to help Seokmin lift Vernon, but before he can, his foot hits a rock, tripping himself and causing Seokmin to stumble over into the hard snow.

( -1 Health: Joshua, DK )

“I’m fine, keep moving!”

The cable car is about 30 feet away, and the cloaked man is beginning to rise back to his feet. You’re so close, 17 feet away, 13, 10...

“Fuck,” Wonwoo curses quietly as his foot slips out from under him. “Just a patch of hard snow, I’m fine.” 

( -1 Health: Wonwoo )

You’re so close. 8 feet, 5, 3...

The snowy mountain air swirls around you as you stumble through the cable car door. Your arm automatically moves to block the door frame to allow the boys to pile in. You count heads as the boys arrive, frantically forcing their way in through the entrance.

As the last boy, the short one that nodded to you in the hallway, passes through the door frame, he slams a button on the wall, causing the car door to slide shut. It seems like his hand is bleeding.

You find a seat in the very corner of the cable car and glance around at the other six as they all catch their breath. Directly across from you sits Hoshi and the short boy from the hallway. To your left is Seokmin, with Vernon’s head in his lap. You spot a fresh, large bruise on Vernon’s bicep, peeking from under his shirt sleeve. At his feet sits the boy who glared you down just earlier, the one who clearly does not trust you, rubbing at his shoulder in pain. Across from him, Joshua clutches the leg he’d tripped on. You turn to look out of the window, praying that these minor injuries are their last.

Nobody speaks for a second. The silence is eerily loud.

You break the quiet first, trying your best to take everyone’s mind off of the moment. “Hey… We made it.”

Nobody reacts right away, but out of the corner of your eye, you can see Seokmin nod his head softly. Being reminded of the others surely motivates them to keep moving.

“Soonyoung,” You continue, “That was cool back there... Your reflexes are so fast.”

“Of course they are.” He’s clearly not in a good mood, but his anger doesn’t stop him from accepting your compliment. The small one sitting next to him rolls his eyes. Now that you’re able to take a proper look, you can see that his hand really is bleeding, and a lot more than you’d expected.

( -1 Health: Woozi )

“Ah...” You feel responsible for his injury. “Your… your hand-”

“I’m fine.” He snaps.

With everyone angry, holding a conversation is nearly impossible. Maybe it’s just a panicked instinct, or maybe it’s the guilt you feel for not being able to decide what to do back there, but you persist regardless, rambling without thinking through your words.  “I’m… I’m glad you’re okay. I don’t know your name yet, but-”

“Jihoon.”

“Oh, nice to meet you.”

The second your mouth shuts, the car immediately falls back into deafening silence. For a while, the quiet guilts you even more, until a slight nudge on your arm causes you to look up in worry. You turn to your right to see Seokmin, smiling softly your way. You return the gesture, feeling just a little bit better, but barely.

The car eventually pulls into the station at the cliff of another mountain, and you breathe a sigh of relief. Everyone walks out ahead of you as the door slides open, straight into the arms of the others who’d been waiting. Their bond is strangely warming, but, of course, not to be questioned.

As they exchange hugs and fuss over one another’s wounds, you begin walking towards the cable car station without realizing. Minghao’s familiar voice calls out after you as you reach for the door knob.

“Don’t bother,” He explains, “We tried. It’s locked from inside. No windows, either.”

You frown to yourself, eyeing the dusty old door before walking along the wall, headed straight to the back of the station. The boys follow you in confusion, but you aren’t really sure what you’re doing either. The back walls are completely hidden behind vines and snow to the point that the wood isn’t even visible anymore, but you reach into the cold mess anyways. Your hand is freezing, but as you slide your fingers over the wooden wall, they close around a metal handle, and you turn it with a click.

The boys stare in astonishment as you pull open a rotted wood door.

“How’d you even see that? Good eye,” The first boy you met says, warmly patting your back and nodding for everyone to hurry in.

The boys filter into the abandoned station one by one. After counting twelve, the one you’d first met takes the door handle from your grip, gesturing for you to head on in first.

You walk into the room and flick a light switch on the wall. The bulb overhead flickers weakly before bursting, launching the room right back into the darkness it was before.

“No worries,” the boy says as he enters the room last, closing the door behind him. “Light would make us seen anyways.”

You don’t say anything as everyone scatters about the room, sitting amongst the floor, standing by the walls, some scavenging through drawers as thoroughly as they can. They really do move like clockwork, always in sync.

You lean against the closed door and catch your breath.

The boy you first met clears his throat yet again. “Is everyone okay? Does anyone need anything?”

The boys one by one assure each other on their wellbeing before bringing up the topic of getting back home. Some of them begin to suggest ideas, but they all wind up without any clue as to what happens next. You hear a lot of them mention calling the manager and returning to the company. You have zero clue what they mean.

The boys sit in uncertainty for a while before the first one places a hand on your shoulder. “”And how about you? Are you okay?”

The boys take notice of you for the first time in a while. It seems like they forgot all about you, lost in their worry over each other, but you find yourself thankful for anyone asking at all.

“Yeah, I’m fine.” you say, feeling oddly embarrassed. It’s threatening, in a way, to have so many people staring at you at once.

“Any ideas for our next move?” The boy asks.

“Um..” You look around and meet their eyes one by one in the dark, “...I think we need to rest before anything.”

The group nods in approval, finally taking their eyes off of yours and falling back into their own quiet conversations. You take a deep breath, heart pounding as though you’d just passed a test.

“Then we’ll stay here for tonight and leave tomorrow.” the first boy you met announces, “Rest up for now.”

He walks over to you as everyone around him settles down. “Hey, I just realized you don’t know us yet.”

You shake your head, and over the next hour find yourself sitting against the wall beside him as he goes through each stranger one by one.

After getting to know almost everyone, he turns to you with a warm smile. “Now the only name you don’t know is mine. I’m Seungcheol, but you can call me Coups. What’s your name?”

Before you can answer, a commotion starts up on the other side of the room. The boys hurry over to Vernon, whispering and gasping at the sight of the boy pulling himself slowly into a sitting position. He’s finally conscious.

“Bro,” Soonyoung yells, clearly not too angry anymore, “That girl over there saved your life!”

The boys move aside, allowing Vernon to meet your eyes. He stares blankly for a moment, a little too long. He’s dazed. You know the feeling. “I- Ah- thanks…?”

You shoot him a quick grin before everyone surrounds him once again.

As everyone settles in for the night, you do your best to practice names in your head. Junhui, Seungkwan, Jihoon… You turn to look at the figure lying next to Seokmin. It’s the boy from the garage, Vernon. For a moment, the moonlight makes it look like he’s staring at you, but now you can clearly tell that he’s fast asleep. Strange.

Satisfied at your progress with the group’s names, you finally drift off into a drowsy slumber. For once, you are able to rest. For hours, it is peaceful.

That is, until the sound of footsteps awakens you. You bolt upright into a sitting position as the boys around you wake up slowly. Coups puts his pointer finger to his lips in a shushing motion, warning you all to stay quiet.

By the sounds of it, the abductors have caught up.

“Shit. they found us.” Jihoon whispers.

“We gotta go.” Wonwoo says, rising cautiously to his feet, “Before they see us in here.”

Jeonghan shakes his head in fear. He clutches at his hurt leg. “What do you expect me to do? Run?”

“How are we supposed to hide in here? They’ll take us. Or worse, some of us.” Dino frowns. Minghao nods in agreement. “If we’re outside, we can at least run. If we stay here, we’re trapped.”

You all watch as Mingyu unlocks the front door, peering out the crack just a bit before carefully closing it again. He turns to you all with a confident stare. “They’re not that close yet. We can sneak past them.”

Coups, clearly panicked, turns to face you. “What do we do?”

His eyes are full of trust, yet pure terror. Your heart is beating at a hundred miles a minute, but everyone’s panicked and waiting for an answer. You level your eyes with Coups and match the intensity behind his stare. You have to do what’s right.

- Sneak out?

or

- Hide?

( Vote now on instagram.com/ificould_au. You have 24 hours. )

[bekahdoesnerdshit]

cog! indifference because I feel like that’s not a very cog thing she tends to feel. also: disgust! enthusiasm! raini: panic! mischief! ............ lust??? for auriga: frustration... excitement... boredom! ayen: anxiety, confusion!

Already answered disgust and enthusiasm for Cog, and mischief for Raini! Great minds, great minds, the group chat shares one braincell, etc. etc. 

Cog

Indifference: I think Cog struggles to process and express a lot of negative emotions, because she’s made such a conscious choice to repress put them out of her mind in pursuit of positivity. But she can get angry! She can get snippy because she’s stressed and hasn’t slept enough! But even then, even though the emotion is negative, at least she’s feeling and doing something. She’s taking a stand! She’s acting in defense of something she believes in! Indifference, though? It’s passive, it’s an inaction, it’s giving up. She has a bleeding heart, she isn’t capable of just turning that off and deciding she doesn’t care. If Cog gets to the point of indifference, it’s because she’s physically and emotionally exhausted. There’s too many morally gray choices she’s being forced to make, and there’s never a “right” answer, and everything she does hurts someone who doesn’t deserve it. Cog’s indifference is head down, shoulders hunched, tired eyes and still, folded hands. It’s pulling back from the conversation around her and letting the rest of the party decide the right course of action instead of weighing in and trying to steer them toward a more morally upstanding decision. She’s tired, and there’s no time to rest, and there’s no objective “good” to push toward. What does it matter what decision they make in the face of that? 

Raini

Panic: Flighty! If I had to pick one word- which I do not because as yesterday’s ask proved I have never in my life heard of “brevity”- panicked Raini is flighty. Whether that just means skittish in the moment, moving quickly from spot to spot as things Spook her, or if that means leaving the situation entirely with a Dimension Door or Teleport, she is not going to stay in one place very long at all. Her movements when she talks get a lot more jerky and abrupt, and she loses most of her intentionally cultivated air of aloofness evaporates. I don’t think it comes to this very often! I think it takes a lot to rattle Raini to the point of panic. But, you know, again. Sometimes you kill the goddess of magic, or whatever. Sometimes you’re staring down the barrel of an attack you know you won’t survive, and you have enough time to whip around to face your party with wide eyes before the blade of a sword that’s nearly as long as you are tall sinks home in your stomach, and you have just a second to panic because. What if this is the end? Are the others going to try to help you? Why would they? They don’t have to! I think, of just about every emotion, panic is the one Raini hates the most. You’re helpless, it means you’ve lost your head, and you’re just grossly out of control of the situation. Pass! Hard fucking pass!!! Lust: You just want to know how she acts when Ecstasy is visiting and that’s Fair but you have to own it.  Raini who’s trying to Get some is honestly like. Essentially unrecognizable. Y’all know that “oh, with the horns!! you’re so funny!” text post? But like, for real. And maybe 40% sarcastic? She’s SO more touchy than she usually is, especially on the bicep or upper thigh if they’re sitting down. Lots of lip biting, lots of stolen glances through eyelashes, and honestly? I think she’s very much the type of person to just circle while she flirts. We’re playing coy a little, but we’re also moving a little closer on each pass, so read into that what you will. Also! It’s definitely a competition to her, in a weird way? Like she’s super pale, so any amount of blushing shows up super clearly, but she will Not acknowledge it because that is losing. Somehow. Even though we all know how the night ends anyway. And while there are no losers when it comes to having sex with someone who is very hot very sensual very sexy, Raini does Not generally get to maintain her pride to the extent she would like to those nights. Is that too much information? Maybe so! But you asked, So! (Also again I Know this is non-verbal BUT such a big part of Raini flirting is banter. What’s the point of spending time on someone who already can’t keep up with you outside the bedroom?)

Auriga

Frustration: I think, in an incredibly ambitious and unprecedented move, I have finally created a character who is a wellspring of patience. He’s an elf, a cleric, a ruler, and a middle child. Technically. He has a fuse, because everybody does, but it’s probably literally about a mile long. But like, as a result? When it’s done, he’s done. He finally gets fed up trying to explain something to someone? Well, that’s it. His expression is still placid and pleasant, because he was Raised Well, but he’s written them off entirely. Too stupid to make understand, to slow to bother with. He’s had too much of a frustrating situation? It’s hopeless. There’s nothing to be done about it. Someone else is going to have to take care of it. He pulls back entirely behind manners and decorum, smiles politely but coldly, and excuses himself from the situation as soon as is respectable. Excitement: Aww this was so sweet to think about. Generally, Auriga is a pretty reserved person! The centuries of High Expectations (and a seven charisma) will do that to you! Can’t put your foot in your mouth if you don’t open it in the first place! But when he’s excited, he lights up. You get a real, not practiced smile, and soft touches on your forearm or shoulder. Still respectable!! But small, fleeting moments of intimacy, urging the other person to be as excited as he is about what is, in fairness, probably some pretty lame shit. I think he’s also very likely to default to drawing pictures to explain whatever he’s talking about so that the other person can see exactly what he means. Someone who engages and asks the right questions can absolutely get him to talk for hours about a given topic, when before that they may have heard barely a handful of words from him. Boredom: I’m making this character choice now and I may come to regret it when we start to actually play but I don’t care: Auriga’s default when he’s bored is to start to doze off. Like, has he had a lot of practice sitting in council meetings for long hours, debating circles around the same topic without making much, if any, progress? Sure! But that’s, bless him, something he finds interesting. Somehow. If it’s something he has absolutely zero interest in though (like, for example, a stuffy, boring play he’s obligated to attend out of professional courtesy? hypothetically) I think he’ll try to focus for a while? Because he was raised right, he has manners. But eventually his chin finds its way to his palm, and his eyes start to droop, and idk if mechanically elves can sleep and just don’t or if he’s just trancing in the middle of a public place (which I guess would be less conspicuous, technically?) but our boy is No Longer Paying Attention. 

Ayen

Anxiety: Anxious Ayen is fidgety. Bounce the leg! Continually summon and dismiss various small hexblade weapons! Open your hand, close it around the handle of a dagger. Open it agin and let the dagger disappear in a puff of smoke, close it again around a weird crooked sickle. Open your hand and let the sickle disappear, close it again around-- And so on, and so forth. I think she gets worked up really easily when she’s anxious, gets kinda jumpy, and is definitely ready to shoot off at a moment’s notice to go do whatever there is to do that will get rid of or distract from her anxiety.  (Also I know the original prompt was ‘non-verbal’ but it’s important to me that you know that she for sure talks to herself when she’s anxious, like. “Okay Ayen, you got this. We have no clue what the Fuck is going on, but we’re gonna pull it together and take it the fuck out. Alright? Alright.”) Confusion: Ayen is that classmate you sit next to in like some fuckoff high level math class, and the professor is talking and you realize you have No idea what they’re talking about? And you look over at Ayen to see if she can clarify anything, and she’s already writing “bro idfk” on the corner of her notes for you to read. If Ayen’s confused she’s gonna default to thinking it’s funny, because like. Can’t look stupid if you’ve decided the stuff you don’t understand is stupid first! So she’ll laugh, and shrug real big, and make a show of not caring what’s going on, because that saves face. That’s dumbshit nerd stuff, she is Way too cool for that.

[tellywoodtrash]

sanjivani 22.10.19 lb

this show is majorly delivering on the slo mo baywatch runs that make its leads' chests look absolutely amazing. yest surbhi and today namit. thank you, lord, for blessing us so. mmmmmmmmhmmmm.

why would there be a random ambulance just standing there, that too at such close distance to the hospital????? kuchhh bhiiiii.

haaye bechaara. kitna panicked hai.

what's he finding wrong with her pulse that he's yelling at the driver to drive fast????

MOST IMPORTANT QUESTION: WHO IS THE DRIVER?????/// TELL ME IT'S RAHIL AGAIN, TRYING TO EARN FORGIVENESS FROM ISHANI FOR LAST NIGHT.

biiiiiiiiiiiiiiiitch.

omggggggggggg his faaaaaaaace. he's a childddddd. a small sad child!!!!!! please stop torturing him like this!!!!!!

but she's kinda justified. he did pull this shit on her. more than once.

behold the lengths a man will go to avoid confrontation: he's ready to fucking jump from the moving vehicle to not have this conversation.

"gaadi nahi rukegi, naahi darwaaza khulega. rahi baat nikalne ki, toh yeh choti choti windows hain, aapko aise DUBUKKE jaana hai toh aap jaa sakte hain."

lmaooooooooooooooooo

forget the windows, poore ke poore ambulance mein hi bechaara dubukke khada hai, bent in 8 different places like ashtavakra, to fit in here.

the haq with which she's holding him. ladki mein gooooda hai, boss.

ishani still coming at him with logic and rationality, which my man is bilkullllllllll not in the mood for.

clue # 2 about the trauma has been supplied. pyaar nahi hua, ishani se The Amazing Race khilwa raha hai yeh kameena.

"what is wrong with you??? doctor banna tumhara sapna nahi tha kya?? hum adults hain, right??? toh tum kyun ek college ki ladki ki tarah behave kar rahi ho??? ek ladka mil gaya tumhe, uspe interest aaya, toh baaki sab bhool gayi??? tumhare zindagi ka maqsad, tumhare passions, tumhare dreams, kahaan gaye??? tum woh ladki nahi ho, jo ek medical ki seat barbaad karogi, taaki tumhari zindagi mein ddlj ho jaaye, ek prince charming aa jaaye!!!! tumhara dimaag kharaab ho gaya hai kya????"

omfgggggggggggg i live for sid's admonishments of ishani; even in frustration, he's so good to her and focused on furthering her career, than the dumbassery she's doing that is personally hurtful to him. fuck, he is legit my favt. tellywood boy ever. everrrrrr.

ishani be like, boo you cute, but you act reaaaaallll bad.

lmao rahil and him could be twins with how bad they are at hiding guilt face. you stupid adorable boys.

oh shit. low blow. parents ke naam ka taana. still supportive of her and career, but.......... rude. hurtful.

stupid boy, you've GOT to stop looking at her LIKE THIS if you want her to believe you.

surbhi's bod in these new outfits is seriously inspiring me to work out, you guys. my body is basically this, but more..... soft. and with the patented dravidian child-bearing hips. gotta start moving to look this good. *prints out and puts this pic on wall as fitspo*

she's like bitch i'm not even the least bit dumb, i can see right through the bs you're doing. also, you're just gonna beat yourself up for all this shit you're saying to me now, so save yourself the heartache.

"main woh ladki nahi hoon ke jiska dil lag jaaye aur duty bhool jaaye."

YAAAAAAAAAAAS SIS. 21ST CENTURY GIRL, TERA HAI YEH SAARA WORLD!!!!!!!!!! (NIMA SANDALLLLLLLLLL GIRL!!!!!!!!!)

"naahi main woh ladki hoon, jiska dil lag jaaye, aur woh itni asaani se apna dil tootne de."

"aapka ilaaj toh main karke rahoongi."

lmaooooooooooo i mean.... good luck sis. i'm rooting for you.

7 din, and you'll be kissing the hem of my skirttttttt bitch. and then work your way upwards. then downwards again and then upwards again.

"shit is this what girls feel like, when objectified by men this way? it's nottttttt a nice feeling, to have consent invalidated."

HAAYE BECHAARA. STOP TORTURING MY BOY LIKE THISSSSSS. DEKHA NAHI JAAATA ISKI HAAALAT. DILLLLLL DUKHTA HAIIIII.

oh god the fuck is he gonna do to make her hate him now?!?!

BUT THE MOST PRESSING QUESTION OF THIS WHOLE SCENE IS THIS: DOES THIS HOSPITAL JUST HAVE ONE SPARE AMBULANCE LYING AROUND AT ALL TIMES FOR THESE PETTY GAMES BETWEEN RESIDENTS????

ouff this one has gotten all into her feelz over vile vardhan. MA’AM, YOU’RE IN YOUR THIRTIES. IT’S JUST “COFFEE”. JUST COZ YOU LIKE WHAT IS BEING SERVED DOESN’T MEAN YOU BUY THE WHOLEASS COFFEE SHOP. JUST INDULGE IN THE COFFEE, SOMETIMES A CROISSANT, AND THEN GO THE FUCK BACK TO YOUR REAL LIFE. KOI ZINDAGI EK HI COFFEE SHOP MEIN THODI BITAATA HAI?????

yeh kiski aatma ke liye shanti pooja kar raha hai?

oh ho. didi marii thi, shashank ke haathon. hmmmmm.

stop playing these mind games, shashank!!!!!!! ouff siddhu, why couldn't this be you, and that plot be shashank's!?!?!?

ugh whatever, i'm just gonna stare at gurdeep's face. that's honestly all i care about in this plotline. nothing else.

LMAO ISKO KOI KAAM DHANDHA NAHI HAI KYA? GURNEY PE LAITE FLICKERING LIGHT PE CHID RAHI HAI.

"waah. tubelight ko meri baat samajh mein aa gayi! lekin uss bulb, dr. sid, ko meri baat samajh mein nahi aa rahi." snort.

lo aa gaye.

challenge pe update.

lol i love them.

ishani wants a scientific approach to handling sid, while asha is like bhakkkk, andar ki sheila waali jawaani ko jagaaa.

boys are very thrilled at this prospect. haraamis.

"tu kya keh kehna chah rahi hai, main apne aap ko unke upar thop doon??? pagal hai kya, yeh sab mujhse nahi hoga! aur itna hai, toh tu khud karle!"

"khud toh main kar loon, par woh kehte hai na, SISHTER BEFORE MISHTER. ab jo cheez teri hai usse apna kaise bana loon????"

LMAO I LOVE ASHA THE MOSTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT

tharki boys are alllllllll for this idea and like, love nahi toh "gullu gullu" toh zaroor hona hai. TUM HARAAMIYON KO BAS MAZZE LOOTNE HAIN!!!!!!!

lo ji.

SIS TAKE YOUR HANDS OFF YOUR CHEST, I FULLY KNOW WHAT YOU'RE GOING THROUGH, AND THAT IT'S LIKE STEEL COVERED WITH SILK AND ALL, BUT THIS IS A WORKPLACE!!!!!!!!

itna confidence chahiye life mein; ki supermodel boss pe itne tadi se line maaroon.

oufffffffffffff. manhoos ne teams shuffle kar diye. ishani ko rishabh ke team mein daal diya.

lmao whose teams are aman and neil on tho????? no one wants them, and they're just floaters????

"yeh toh ulti ganga bahaa di isne!"

lolololololol the stinkeyes aman and neil are giving sid for stiffing ishani like this. friends ho toh aise!

MY MAN YOU NEED TO STOP LOOKING AT HER LIKE THIS IF YOU WANT HER TO BELIEVE YOU AREN'T WHIPPED FOR HER.

OMFG LOOK AT THE HEELS CHANDNI IS WEARING AND SHE'S STILL BARELY SKIMMING NAMIT'S SHOULDER. SHE SO SMOL.

shakal pe maut aayi hui hai tere, bro. who you think you're kidding???

———————————————————————

i'm so glad that ishani's savage side has been unleashed. badaaaaaa mazaaaa aayega, now that she gives less than zero fucks.

[tessxomarie]

Saving You - Part Eight

*TRIGGER WARNING!!! This scene deals with the aftermath of a sexual assault, self-harm takes place and other discussions about sexual assault follow. If you need to skip this part, please do so. If you or someone you know has been a victim of sexual assault and need a resource to reach out, please click this link: https://www.rainn.org/about-national-sexual-assault-telephone-hotline My inbox is always open if you would like to talk.*

I managed to run out of the clubhouse and into the office. I couldn’t even tell you how I did it, or who I passed by as I ran out of there.

I don’t even feel safe in here in the office, so I opt to go into the bathroom.

That was a mistake.

The mirror greets me, my makeup is smeared from my tears. My hair is a mangled mess.

Anger fills my body, sadness overtakes my heart and I just lose it.

I scream, and I slide down against the door which is still open.

I snap my pony tail on my wrist, but it’s doing nothing. The pain is still here. I hate feeling it.

Against every smart judgement in my mind, my body is on autopilot.

I crawl a step towards the sink cabinet in hopes to find what I’m looking for.

I open the cabinet and I see it, it’s shining like a first- place trophy - only this is far from a win.

I pick up the razor, and I take out the blade.

I close the door with my foot, and I just cry.

Sobs escape every 20 seconds it seems.

I’m not safe. I’m not protected. I am afraid.

“You lied, Jax. You lied to me. You and Tara both.” I sob.

I then revert back to old habits...my mind is at war, I know I shouldn’t do this - there are other ways but the other part of me, the part of mind that has had this old wound reopened, it’s as if this is my only option.

“Lies. That’s all you and Marcus fed me, didn’t you Jax?” I say between sniffles as I see the blood run down my arm.

“I’m doomed just like Briana and Jesse. There’s no way out of this.” I whisper, and that’s the last thing I remember before closing my eyes.

I start to come to it when I hear shouting.

“Leah! Leah please, please be in here!” A woman shouts.

“EZ, she has to be in here, I don’t know where she would run off to.” I faintly hear.

Kendra.

I hear what I think is the opening of the office door.

“Fuck.” A man says, whom I think is EZ as I’m in and out of it.

“Oh my god.” I hear a young voice say. “Isn’t that a hair tie on the ground?” She says...Letty.

“No. No no no no, Aleeah!” Kendra wails.

Next thing I hear is the bathroom door opening and a faint light from the office light shining down on me.

“No, Lee, no no no.” EZ says.

“Call an ambulance, now. Go EZ, go go go.”

“Letty, go get Bishop and Coco, now!”Kendra orders.

“Aleeah, come here, look at me, okay? You gotta open your eyes babe, come on.” I hear Kendra say as I feel her touch.

She takes the rag I was loosely holding and applies pressure for me.

I then feel her hands on my wrists. It’s then when I hear a big sob.

“Jesus, Leah. What happened? Come on, chica. Open your eyes, you have to be okay, come on.” She says as she grabs my face in her hand.

I slowly open them, again it’s like my body is at war with itself. I know I need to get it together and admit to Kendra what I just endured but the other part of my body is on shutdown mode.

“Kenz.” I whisper.

Kendra breathes a sigh of relief, “That’s my Lee, babe tell me what happened. Who hurt you?” She asks through tears.

“Erik.” I say and then I close my eyes again.“Motherfucker.” Kendra seethes.

“Leah!” I hear a man shout and it grows louder and louder.

I hear footsteps and I open my eyes ever so gently.

Angel.

“Oh my fucking God. Kendra, what happened? She needs help!” He says in a panic.

I look over to Kendra and she wipes her eyes, as she remains putting pressure on my wrist with a rag. She holds up my hair tie, and Angel gives her a confused look.

“She always wears a hair tie on her wrist, always. When that hair tie is off, it means she was hurt - horribly.”

My eyes feel like anchors, but I look up at Angel, and his face drops.

His eyes lock with mine, and from what I can make out from my angle, it looks as if tears are forming in his eyes.

“Ambo is on its way, I called Franky too - he called Shelby, they’re waiting for you at the ER, Leah. If Franky gets here first he’ll take you.”“Thanks, EZ.” I say barely above a whisper.

Angel just stands there, frozen. “Come on, bro. Let’s give the girls some space. We can follow them to the hospital.” EZ says to Angel.

I know I’m out of it, but I’m not that out of it to realize this is their first brother interaction I’ve witnessed in nine months.

“Lee, baby. I’m so sorry I wasn’t here for you, again. God, I suck. Like, what kind of friend let’s this shit happen twice and does nothing?” Kendra rambles.

I let out a light laugh, “Kenz, stop. No apologies are needed from you, okay? This shit, it just likes to happen to me I guess.”

Kendra then looks around to make sure no one is in ear shot and then she zeroes in on me and looks me dead in the eyes.

“Aleeah, we are going to talk about this and we are going to take Erik out, comprende? This is not a debate. This is going to get handled or else I’m stepping in.” She says with authority.

“Okay. We’ll talk, just not here. Let me get checked out first.” I say.

I see flashing lights from the reflection of the office windows. For whatever reason, I want to stand up and walk out of here on my own power, but it’s like my body is frozen - that internal battle continues.

“Leah.” Shelby says breathlessly, which catches Kenz and I off guard.

“Shelby, what are you doing here?” We both say at the same time.

“The MC called me and called Franky. When they told me what they saw of you, I knew I had to be the one to come take care of you. Leah, you’re going to be alright, okay? Let’s get you checked out, and maybe keep you for observation? That’s just a maybe.” She says in a positive tone, as she knows how to handle me with this situation, it’s not the first time she’s seen me like this, but God I hope it’s the last.

“Okay, that’s fine. Can we just go already? The sooner I get this done, the sooner I can be in my own bed.” Kendra and Shelby nod in agreement, and they both help me up and both guide me outside, that is where I’m swarmed by the Mayans.

“Aleeah, mija what happened?” Bishop asks full of worry as he rushes to me. “Jesus fucking Christ, Leah, sweetheart.” He continues.

“I’ll fill you in later.” I reply.

“I fucking hate this.” I hear Bishop say to Hank as I walk past them.

Bish, Coco, EZ and Angel along with everyone else gather right by the squad car.

“You boys can follow me, just give Leah some space for now.” Shelby states as she helps me get into the ambulance.

Franky then announces he’ll give the MC an escort. Before the paramedic closes the ambulance door, the last image I see is a group of grown ass men standing there - looks of shock and worry written all over their face. My eyes turn to Angel, who has now turned his back towards me but EZ has his hand on his shoulder, as if he is comforting him.

For whatever reason, I look towards the cage...and then I see those eyes - Erik’s eyes, beaming at me.

He’s has to be handled with, I think to myself as we take off to the ER.

I’m taken to the county hospital, also known as my place of occupation.

Shelby makes sure it looks as if I’m not there, but then a co-worker sees me, and we have to fib a few things and tell others that I had fainted and the MC demanded I’d be rushed to the ER - the story worked, and my co-workers bought it.

I’m in a stupid hospital gown, this thing is a serious atrocity.

“Is it wrong of me to say I’m more upset you made me change into this Mumu than letting me stay in my clothes?” I whine to Shelby.

“When you’re the patient, you don’t get a choice Leah.” She smirks as she looks over my chart.

Kendra is sitting on the edge of my bed. “if it makes you feel any better, you look hot in that gown.”

I laugh, because that’s what Kendra does best - makes me laugh.

“Okay, Leah, I’m going to run the rape kit. This is almost over...and if you want to talk, you know I’m here for you. I totally understand if you don’t, I only advise that you talk to someone, okay?” Shelby lectures.

I nod with a flat smirk, “Doctor’s orders are noted.” I say.

Shelby leaves my room and Kendra scoots closer to me on my bed.

“Can we talk?” She asks.

I readjust my position in my bed to sit up straight.

“Jesus Kenz, let her close the door first.” I scoff.

Kendra eye rolls me.I then take a deep breath and tell her what I remember.

“Erik was at the party, I had no clue the Oakland guys were coming down here. I had a gut feeling he was there, and that’s when I texted you. I knew you were on your way, I was just hoping you could have been there sooner. I tried making small talk with Angel, you know since he’s given me the weird cold shoulder for a little bit. He gave me the time of day for like a minute, I started to apologize for the whole Adelita bullshit, and that’s when Erik made his move. He slipped his arm around my waist. Angel the excused himself and left.” I begin to tell Kendra, and that’s when I hear a knock at my door. I can see from the little window, it’s the guys.

“I can go tell them to come back later. You need to rest, Lee.” Kendra insists.

“No, bring them in. I’ll tell them what happened, or at least part of it. I’ll come clean tomorrow, after I’m able to go home and shower - but I have to tell Marcus everything too. He needs to be the first to know.”

Kendra squeezes my hand and nods as she gets up to go let the MC in.

The entire Santo Padre Chapter is now standing around my bed.

Bishop, EZ and Angel are the closest ones to my bed. Everyone else stands behind them.

“Sweetheart, how are you doing?” Bishop asks. Kendra is now standing right next to me and holds my hand.

“I have to tell you all something, but I’m not ready to discuss it all right now.” I begin.

“You have our attention, Leah.” Bishop states. I clear my throat and run my free hand through my hair.

“Well, as you can see, I have a bandage on this wrist because I cut myself. I was a cutter back when I was a teenager, and I only cut when things got bad...really, really bad.” I tell them. I then look to Kendra for encouragement, she tilts her head and nods “Only share what you want to, you can tell them everything tomorrow.” She whispers.

I can feel tears forming as I’m about to say the words out loud to someone other than Kendra or Shelby.

I take another deep breath and I look at Angel, he looks so worried - so nervous, scared even.

“I was raped...at the clubhouse. That’s why I ran outside, and I went into the office bathroom. Found a razor, and now I’m here.” I say with slow tears rolling down my face.

The guys faces all drop, mutters of “Fuck.” and “Jesus Christ” echo in the room.

Riz, Taza, Hank and Creeper all look away for a moment - a combination of them pinching back tears of their own, and them trying to form words.

Coco and Gilly stare mindlessly, trying to process my words.

Angel, he’s taking it the worst.He keeps shaking his head, “Fuck no, no Leah, no.” He whines, “How could someone do this to you? Who was it? We’ll take care of it.” He shouts ever so slightly.

“Angel, calm down. You can’t get all wound up, not in here.” EZ says to his brother.

“What the fuck do we do then, brother? We let the fucker who did this roam our clubhouse free?” Angel fires back.

I can’t help but laugh, seeing and hearing these two argue - it snaps me back into some normalcy.

“Well I have to admit, it’s nice seeing you two speak to each other.” I chime in. Angel and EZ both look at me like little boys who were just caught sneaking cookies from the cookie jar.

“Sorry, Lee. We just want to help, in any way.” EZ says.

“Agreed, sweetheart. You name it, we’ll help. You’re not in this alone.” Bishop assures me as he comes to my side.

“Thank you Bish, and thank you guys for coming. I seriously didn’t mean for this to happen, I’m sorry for ruining the party.” I say with guilt, and then I feel more guilt for feeling remotely guilty for what happened.

“Leah, none of this is your fault.” Coco chirps. I give an empathetic nod, trying like Hell to agree with him.

“Okay guys, I think that’s all Leah is up for discussing tonight. I’ll come grab you if she needs anything.” Kendra announces and starts to push the MC out the door.

“I’m going to have one of the guy’s stay back, keep an eye on you and your surroundings. When you want to talk more, we’re here for you, babe.” Bishop says once more before kissing my forehead.

As he walks towards the door, Angel darts towards him. “I’ll stay back, protect her. Please Bish, let me do this.” He begs.

Bish then looks to me, “Are you okay with Angel keeping an eye on you?”

Part of me is in shock; to see Angel show this much emotion, to show the willingness to help - it doesn’t seem real.

“Uhh, yeah. That’s fine.” I stutter.

Bishop then leaves.

“Lee, I’m going to go find Shelby and see if she knows when you can be released.” Kendra announces.

“Okay.” I say as I twiddle my thumbs, I’m about to be left alone in a room with Angel and for whatever reason I’m nervous.

Just as Kendra heads out the door, Angel stops her and they both think I cannot hear them but that’s the opposite.

“Kendra,” Angel starts, “you said that when she took off the hair tie, that means things went horribly wrong...did you mean this isn’t the first time this has happened?” I hear Angel ask.

“You need to ask her that yourself.” I hear Kendra answer, and that’s when I see Angel’s head hang low.

He turns back and comes into my room, he lingers at the edge of my bed.

Awkward silence fills the room.

“I don’t know what to say right now, but I want you to know that I will help you - we’re going to take care of this.” He says as he crouches down to my level at the edge of my bed.

His eyes, they’re soft like the night he was shot and stabbed. There’s a spark of life there. I truly do not know what to say, or if I should even say anything - again, it’s like my body is frozen.

This pull I’ve felt towards Angel, it’s like a compass trying to find out where the true north is, spinning and spinning - I legit feel like I’m in Pocahontas.

“Thank you.” I say above a whisper, nodding my head in his direction.

He gives me a weak smile, and he keeps eying my bandage on my wrist.

He then goes and sits on the chair that is right by the foot of my bed.

“Leah, I need to ask this, because I have a feeling in the pit of my stomach.” Angel announces.

“What?” I ask confused.

“Erik did this, didn’t he?” He asks, his hands turn to fists as he already knows my answer.

I then answer his question with a question, “Why do you think that?”

“Leah, please tell me. He did this, didn’t he?” He insists, tears forming in eyes.

I look away because seeing Angel getting emotional is making me emotional.

I nod my head up and down for confirmation.

“No. God Dammit. Leah.” He says, and tears escape his eyes.

He then walks over close to me and kneels at my bedside.

“You were trying to talk to me, because he was there. You knew he was trouble, and I just walked away. I let him do this.” He says, tears slowly falling down his face.

“You didn’t do anything, Angel.” I say as I reach for his hand with my uninjured arm.

“That’s the problem, Leah. I didn’t do anything, I fucking left you when you literally begged me to stay. I’m so fucking sorry. I’m so sorry.” He pleads as he leans in and kisses my forehead.

The thought of anyone showing any affection towards me would have me hugging a toilet, but with Angel – it’s comforting in the strangest way.

He then looks at my bandaged wrist, another tear slips down his face.

He wipes his eyes, “I’m just going to go check outside, to make sure everything is still alright. I’ll be right back.” He assures me.

I then opt to close my eyes for a few moments.

About a half hour later, Kendra & Shelby wake me. I see Angel has dozed off in the chair.

That sight causes me to smile some, seeing this tall biker man passed out in a tiny hospital chair.

“Everything came back negative, Leah.” Shelby whispers, looking over to Angel.

I breathe a sigh of relief.  “It’s more of a shock to know he’s clean than to know what he did to me, again.” I mumble.

Kendra laughs softly, “what matters most is that you are okay, and your injuries are minor in doctor’s terms.”

“Does this mean I can go home tonight?” I ask eagerly.

Shelby nods her head, “Only if you promise to have someone look after you tonight and into tomorrow. That’s my compromise for not holding you here for a psych eval.”

I then motion over to Angel, “I don’t think I can get him out of my sight even if I tried.”

“He’s worried about you, and he’s feeling tremendous guilt.” Kendra says as she looks on at Angel.

“You can get changed and head on home, Leah. Kendra can sign for you if you’d like.” Shelby suggests.

Kendra then smiles deviously, “Hoodrat Kenz about to forge some signatures - bring it on. Oh, here Lee, I had some extra clothes in a bag in my car I had EZ dish out. Don’t worry, they’re clean.”

I let out a laugh, as I open the bag; a black tank top and a pair of capri leggings.

“Thanks, Kenz. Do you mind waking him up? And you can tell the MC I’m being released, just please tell Bishop I need Marcus to be there tomorrow so I can talk to them.” I plead, and Kendra holds my hand and gives in a good squeeze as confirmation.

Angel is woken up by Kenz, and he tries to play it off like it wasn’t sleeping.

“Don’t freak out, it’s not a crime to fall asleep in a hospital room.” I say getting out of bed, slowly.

Angel rushes over to my side and helps me sturdy myself.

Feeling his hands on my arm and waist, it almost feels electric but not in a sexual way by any means, more of that his touch, it feels different than anything I’ve ever felt.

I look up at him in shock that he’s doing this, helping me. He reads my face and I must have scared him because as soon as I was standing straight, he quickly removed his hands.

“Shit, I’m sorry Leah - I wasn’t thinking, knowing you probably don’t want anyone to touch you right now, I’m sorry.” He rambles.

I then reach out for his hand and I squeeze it, assuring him that he is okay.

“It’s okay Angel, trust me.” I say as I look him in the eyes.

“I um…I’m going to let you change and I’ll wait outside for you. The guys drove your car here, so I’ll drive you back to your place, sound good?”

“Yeah, sounds good.” I reply.

The car ride to my apartment is silent, but not an awkward silence. It’s a comfortable silence.

Angel and I pull up to my place. Angel rushes over to my door and opens it for me, which causes me to give him a surprised smile.

“I know I can be an asshole, but I can be a gentleman too.” He playfully says, which then makes me giggle.

For the first time tonight, I’m smiling a true smile.

He walks me to my approach, and before I look up at my door Angel stops.

“Jesus.” He says, and I look at him in confusion and then I look at my door. The word “Biker Whore” is spray painted on my front door, this causes Angel to panic and he tells me to stay behind him.

He draws his weapon, and he reaches for my door to see it is unlocked - “Lock was pried open.” He states.

We move through the front door and my place is trashed. Every room was disturbed, and more words were spray painted.

“Oh my God.” I say as I bring my hands to my mouth in shock and disbelief.

Erik did this. I know it. He hates that I tried to fight back, he hated that I kneed him, that I spit on him, that I fought to escape - this is how he gets back at me.

“I think it’s obvious but I’m going to say this anyway, you’re not staying here tonight.” Angel says as he carefully checks each room until he sees it’s clear.

I don’t have much in this apartment, but it still makes me incredibly sad that someone felt the need to do this - even after they attacked and assaulted me, they opt to add this on.

“As if me being sexually assaulted and violated tonight wasn’t enough, I can’t even go to my one safe place.” I say as tears roll down my cheeks.

Angel turns towards me, and he takes a step to get closer.

I quickly wipe away my tears, it’s as if I’m ashamed to even cry in front of him.

“Come here.” He says as he gently gives me a side hug.

“We’re going to handle Erik, Leah. I fucking promise. Go grab some clothes or whatever you need. I’ll take you to my place for the night.” Angel says, ever so softly.

I take a second and absorb his touch, even though it’s a side hug - it’s unusually comforting. Just like his touch earlier at the hospital.

I go to look in my room, and they just tore everything up. They legit tore it upside down.

As quickly as I opened my door, I close it; if I go in and look I’m going to cry even more.

“That was pointless. I can’t even walk in there. I think I have some clothes by my washer & dryer, just give me a sec.” I say as I pass Angel on by in the hall. “Take your time.” He says.

I look at the small load of laundry on my dryer. Scrubs, lovely. “If I had to work, I’d be all set, too bad I’m not.” I mumble as I’m more frustrated with myself.

I managed to find a pair of jeans, and a pair of jean shorts along with a few t-shirts to wear the next few days. I tell myself I can just go shopping in Kendra’s closet tomorrow.

“I have a few things. I guess that’s as good as it gets. I still have my own toothbrush, yay.” I say quietly and Angel motions for me to head out the door.

We arrive at Angel’s house a few minutes after we leave my complex. Again, another silent drive but not awkward.

He again helps me out of my car and leads me to his house. “It’s not much, but it’s just me here. A bed, a roof and some food - it can’t be that bad, right?” He says with a small smile, and when he does that I catch more of a spark in his eye.

Every time we look at each other, it’s as if I’m forgetting why I’m even with him to begin with.

I put my small bag of stuff on one of the living room chairs. I look around, he’s right - it’s not much but it’s perfect for him, just needs a good cleaning.

“Do you mind if I take a shower?” I ask nervously.

“Of course, down the hall, the door straight ahead.” He directs.

“Thanks.” I say quietly, as I still cannot believe I’m actually in his house, or that I’m with him in general.

I get out of the shower, and I realize I didn’t grab anything to sleep in. I’m in a towel, and against better judgment of me just prancing around his house in a towel, I opt to simply ask if he has anything sleeping attire.

“Uhh, Angel?” I nervously holler.

“What is it Leah, are you alright?” He says as he rushes down the hall.

I put my hand up through the little crack of the door, I laugh softly, “I’m fine, it’s just, I didn’t grab anything to sleep in. Can I be lame and borrow a shirt and some shorts?” I ask. Angel takes a moment, it’s as if he is thinking before he speaks which would be a first.

“Boxers or briefs?” He asks with a smirk, which causes me to laugh. That laugh felt really good.

“Clean.” I respond, which causes him to laugh.“I’ll be back in one second.”

He returns quickly with a pair of clean boxers and one of his flannels, a red and black one that I’ve seen him wear numerous of times.

“Here you go, Leah.” He tells me as he hands me these items.

“Thank you, I promise I’ll wash them get them back to you soon.”

He shakes his head and walks away, “don’t worry about it” he says as he wanders down the hall.

I dress myself in the tank top I had worn from the hospital, the black boxers he lent me and I put on his flannel.

As I get dressed, I can see some bruises already forming against my thighs...some around my arms...

I opt to button it halfway, each button I do I look in the mirror. Covering the marks as much as I can.

I take a moment in the mirror, I’m really wearing his shirt, in his house.

The smell...it smells just like him. A mix of scrap metal, biker exhaust and cigarette smoke with a hint of cologne - it’s oddly intoxicating.

I try my hair with towel, and let it air dry. I can already see the natural waves peeking through.

Talk to him, Leah. Just tell him everything. You need to tell someone or else you won’t be able to do it tomorrow.

I remerge from the bathroom and meet Angel in the living room. He has since changed into a tank of his own and some basketball shorts. His tattoos exposed...oh my.

“How are you feeling?” He asks.

“That’s a loaded question.” I retort with a sassy smile.

“Mind if I sit?” I ask motioning to the couch, “Be my guest.” he answers.

“Are you going to bust out in song?” I ask with a laugh, he gives me a confused look.

“Be our guest…? Beauty and the Beast?” I say, hoping to ring a bell.

He lets out a laugh, “Ohhh, Beauty and the Beast – I haven’t watched that since I was a kid.” He replies with a soft smile, never taking his eyes off of me.

His face, it reads of guilt – but I don’t want him feeling any guilt.

He didn’t hurt me, I don’t think he ever would – he trusts me, at least I still think he does.

If he trusts me, maybe I can just spit out the truth to him once and for all.

I have to tell someone this fucked up story.

“I need to talk to you.” I spit.

“Okay.” He says as he sits up, leaning his arms on his knees.

“I need to tell you everything, Angel.”

“About tonight?” He asks.

“Tonight, and just everything. Ineed to tell you about me, my past, and how it has affected me now. It’s been killing me, keeping these secrets so to speak - tonight, it was my breaking point for so many reasons.” I begin and my voice is already shaky.

Angel then moves from the couch to the coffee table in a swift movement. He’s now sitting right in front of me, as I remain on his recliner.

“I’m listening.” He says in a sharp tone, but it’s more of an eager sharp tone.

He reaches his hands out for mine, a gesture I never thought I’d witness.

I then take the initiative and put my hands in his.

Our eyes meet, and his eyes are burning into my soul. He’s giving me his undivided attention for the first time in our nine month history. He’s trusting me right now, to be honest - this is my chance to come clean, get my story out there and not feel scared or afraid anymore.

It’s time to tell someone my fucked up story.

[ghostmartyr]

Pokémon Black 2 Randomized Nuzlocke Run [Part 1]

White was so much fun, the sequel was obviously inevitable. Only I don’t own White 2, so Black 2 shall be our contestant. All encounters and starters will be random, static pokemon are what they are originally. Any pokemon not randomized is ineligible for use.

Nuzlocke rules, again copied from Bulbapedia:

    Any Pokémon that faints is considered dead, and must be released or put in the Pokémon Storage System permanently.

   The player may only catch the first Pokémon encountered in each area, and none else.

My added rules of choice:

Each pokemon must be nicknamed.

If the first pokemon in an area is a species I’ve already caught, the first one that isn’t will become the catch option.

The catch rules start applying once I have the option of catching things.

No looking anything up on guides.

Team wipe means continuing on using whatever I have in the PC.

Let’s have some fun.

Second verse, same as the first.

I haven’t adjusted the text speed yet and it is driving me insane.

I remember having so much love for this gen, but the designs of these poor children still provoke odd looks. Not that I mind walking around with a palm tree on my head, I just question why anyone thought that I would want that.

Hugh!

Wait, do I get to pick his name?

I do!

Uhhh.

Wow, I forgot that this was the hardest part about Nuzlockes. I can’t just go with Hugh if this is a true random. Hm. Okay then, in honor of friendship, this guy’s name can be Russell.

The first thing our mom does in this game is give me cause to ship her with Professor Juniper. Our mom knows her first name. It’s Aurea. Why would she know that if they were not secretly involved in some way???

Is this the first game that has an outside character get first crack at moving the screen around after we’ve chosen our name? I kind of like it.

I like it more now that it’s ending and I can switch the text speed to Fast.

Heeeeey it’s us. Palm tree hair and all.

I never find out what the contrary answers lead to, because I can never make myself pick them. It makes my completionist nature very sad. As does the reminder that I do not have the ability to run yet. Someone please give this poor boy some shoes.

Bianca is here to meet us!

She is not our bestie in this version, but she is in our hearts.

This is our bestie this version.

He’s got a little sister.

Just so we know all that black and red in his color scheme is for show.

Look at him walking in time with us like the total bro he is.

Dude is this his room? I want one.

Bianca! Friend!

That awkward moment when you have the same name as one of her best friends who will never be seen this entire game.

Okay okay okay it’s time.

Time to receive our starter.

Our choices are:

Ah that’s rough. Hm.

My preference is always going to be to have something’s first state, that I can level up and evolve myself, but I recently finished my White run, and in it I had Larvitar’s line as well as Aggron’s, so really, there can be only one choice.

Snorlax, I choose you!

And my first act as your new friend is to give you a brand new name that I need to come up with!

Snore, sleep, yawn... sleep words... Dreamor?

Heck that’s a dorky name. He needs it.

Dreamor got, Russell steps in and asks for an in on our journey. He has his own super special mission that I’m not supposed to remember but I do, and talks Bianca into giving him a pokedex as well. Because Bianca’s a sweetheart.

But before we can go any further, it’s time to d-d-d-d-duel!

Everything about Russell’s design screams childhood-friend-gone-villain and I love how little that has anything to do with his arc.

Oshawaott vs. Dreamor! Lesgo!

Snorlax knows Tackle and Defense Curl, which is actually appropriate for a starter. I am going to be dull and Tackle spam.

...

OHKO.

Dreamor appears to be... enthusiastic. in his participation.

G-good job, boy.

Bianca even walks us to the Pokemon Center, because she’s just that wonderful. She also gives us some Poke Balls (again, see wonderful), which means that we’re officially in business to get this run on the road.

...I really hope Dreamor doesn’t faint everything in one hit. This could be a lonely start for the two of us if he’s as strong as he looks.

-gasp-

Our mother greets us outside the Center and gives us Running Shoes.

Thank you mother. I knew you loved us.

Aw, and Russell’s baby sister gives us a Town Map. Thanks, kiddo. I will deliver your brother’s copy with great haste and competence.

(They keep calling Dreamor Tepig.)

Before we go any further, let’s find out what sort of critter Dreamor is.

Rash and capable of taking hits. Well, if you’re going to be rash, you might as well be prepared to handle what it gets you into. The nature gets a sad face out of me for mechanics, but I always love having Thick Fat available, and look at that smile.

Oh my gosh the gate attendant knows our name and gave us a Potion for our journey. I feel so cared for.

Bianca teaches us how to catch stuff, and we, being an experienced trainer, completely ignore the lesson and wait for control to be returned to us.

The first tall grass awaits our first step. Dreamor! Let us go forth and meet our next friend!

!!!!!!

..Oh heck though.

She’s level 2.

I don’t know if she can eat a Tackle from Dreamor.

Also I might end up not using her because I used her line in the last run but hey I didn’t use Politoed (and I also don’t know how to get a Politoed given the settings).

I’ll throw a ball first, then see if she lives through a Tackle.

...Ah, the return of Hypnosis.

...Is all she knows Hypnosis? No, there’s also Water Sport.

Hey, she lives through a Tackle!

...Barely!

Ball thrown, Poliwhirl get!

From now on, your new name shall be... Stella. And we need to run back to a Center pronto. Your new teammate whacked you one good.

Stella is Quirky and alert to sounds. Sounds good to me, but I have zero clue how to evolve you to a Politoed. I think normally you need a King’s Rock and trading, but I selected the box that cleared up trading requirements for evolutions, giving me no clue whatsoever what to do with you, darling.

All the same, welcome. Your line is one of my favorites.

...Also you are not a Zubat.

Zubat was an option for this route.

Stella, your worth just went up.

Even if I end up not using her due to memories of Wagston overriding sense, I don’t think I can keep her at level 2, so we’re going to do some switch training for a tiny bit.

...Sir, what are you doing here I have been playing for five seconds.

He offers training, but since he gives me my controls right back after him and his neat soundtrack walk around inspecting me, I’m going to go ahead with my original plans.

Stella downed a level 2 Zubat all by herself. She’s growing up so fast.

WHY DOES HYPNOSIS HAVE 100 ACCURACY WHEN IT’S USED AGAINST ME. ;-;

Oh, wow, the next Pokemon Center is just. right there, isn’t it.

“Flocessy Town Prophecy Flocks Here”

You have never known a love as true as Pokemon translators and wordplay. Apparently this is where Alder’s house is. Apparently Champions are now allowed houses, and not only if your name is Cynthia. I call hax.

Alder wants Russell to have his Town Map before training, and Russell is on Route 20, which means....

our next friend

Are the leaves grass, or just pretty?

After tromping over them for several seconds, it looks to be that they are merely pretty. Very pretty, though.

Aha, grass located. What awaits us?

Hello there!

It’s a grand ol’ gen one time, it seems. Dreamor can’t hit you, so Stella, up you go. Please do not kill her.

Gastly get!

You shall be... Caspet.

Caspet has a Mild nature to go with her sturdy body. With her we shall find if I actually screwed up the evolution options. I’m still really new to Randomizer, and probably should have looked up what the choices did on Google before starting this run, but the rule after the run has begun is no guides, so here we are.

We enter Flocessy Ranch, which is a new location. Another friend already. Our fortune is pure.

...How do I keep finding every generation one creature that needs trading to evolve. Is this going to be this run’s theme?

Oh, it Teleported.

I forgot they liked to do that.

...Welp. There’s that route dead.

Is there anything in this route that can give me exp?

Even if there is, it’s so Kadabra heavy that I’d just as soon not bother. Having things constantly run away from you is really tiring. We’ll give Russell his map and leave.

Wait what.

We just fought five minutes ago. Russell. Russell. Just because your theme music is rad as heck and demanding action doesn’t mean you have to be running a mile a minute. That’s the scarf gen’s deal.

Dreamor eats Oshawott and all is well.

Then we get a random sidequest to locate a Herdier for the owners of the ranch. To which Russell experiences Emotions at, because Reasons.

Everyone needs a screenshot of Mareep running in a circle.

Hey, something not Kadabra. Hi Cottonee. Bye Cottonee. And that item ball in the corner is a Poke Ball. Oh, and here’s a Basculin. Look at all these things not running away from us.

...I... need an adult?

Dreamor has taken on the role of adult. I’m not sure Mienshao even knows Fighting moves at that level, but fully evolved things this early on are scary regardless.

We find the Herdier being unhappy with a Team Plasma Grunt.

He throws the Frustration TM at us. Hee.

Herdier has such a cute bwoof.

The day is saved, and now Alder’s down for palling around with us.

By palling around, I mean Alder introduces us to two small children he expects us to beat into the ground. As you do.

All passes without incident. Yay.

We walk outside and Mr. Medal gives us a Medal Box, which I don’t clearly remember, but suspect is intending to prey on me and my achievement hunting ways.

Alder is also kind enough to alert us that a Gym Leader has arrived at our home town. I wonder who it might be, but before that, Alder has a random cave place behind his home. New route?

It’s counted as part of Flocessy, it looks like. I haven’t caught anything within the town limits, but there doesn’t appear to be grass. Water, but I can’t do anything about that yet. Sigh. Oh well.

First badge is Normal, I believe.

...Let’s train Dreamor a tad more before we go after that. I believe in you, buddy, but I am also very rightfully paranoid.

Azumarill live in Caspet’s home grass.

When does Caspet learn something that isn’t Lick or a status move. My poor little ghost.

...

Yeah it’s level 3 but it’s still a scary thing to see.

Hey, first legendary of the run!

And Caspet has Mean Look... We could see if she has what it takes to Lick Kadabra down to size. Like tootsie pops. You could be an owl, Caspet.

This place was crowded with Kadabra, and now there’s Ambipom just hanging out. Okay then. Cue Geodude for some reason. Oh. And Linoone.

-tears for Bandit-

Hey wait hold up. Psychic is super effective against Ghost in this version? That’s... good to know. It also doesn’t sound right, but I don’t think the game cares about that. That’s annoying.

No Caspet, you can’t learn Curse. I’m going to come close enough to killing you as it is. Don’t enable the process.

Let’s go for it, shall we?

Cheren! Friend!

I actually really like the arrangement of his Gym. It isn’t the aesthetic wonderland that other Gyms of this gen are, but that’s kind of what makes it awesome? Cheren runs a school that doubles as a Gym. You battle in chalk-marked arenas out back.

I guess I misspoke; the aesthetic is still rich with this one. School day feels of being young are so very alive here, and I really like it.

Other things deserving of being liked are Cheren being an educator. Our buddy’s found his way, and we get to be his first challenger!

That’s another thing to love, honestly. We spent a whole game with this guy around, and now we’re his debut Gym Leader match. It’s so touching.

Cheren, stop blushing, you’ll be fine.

I mean. Dreamor’s going to mop the floor with you.

But that’s your job now. Losing to trainers of a certain level.

I believe in you, man.

I just believe in Dreamor more.

Awesomeness achieved, and that will do it for this part!

(Except for squeeing because Bianca showed up and gave us the Return TM, as well as the C-Gear I’ll never use, and Cheren and Bianca get to be in the same shot, and it’s the magic of friendship all over again. You did good for yourselves, guys. I’m sorry you don’t remember me as your bestie anymore.)

Until next time for the next badge.

[andrewschlecht]

Untitled

On June 20th, 2015, I woke up with the hymn “Great is Thy Faithfulness” in my head. Not like a normal, I have a song stuck in my head, sort of way. It was more like it was blaring in my head, but a peaceful kind of blaring. It may have been the fact that it was 4:00am and that is not a normal time for me to be up. I tend to lean more to the fact that it was one of those moments in life where you know God is letting you know he is there. This was the day I was giving one of my kidneys (turns out my left) to my father in law Dave. It was a decision that I felt was guided and planned by God.

Dave, medically, is no more than a random person. The odds of two random people being a match for a kidney is less than 5%. I felt the compelled to get tested anyway. Dave is a mentor, friend, and a wonderful father in law. He is also a great Papa to my two boys. I couldn’t imagine life without him. Both his kidneys were failing, and he was soon to be on dialysis. The average person on dialysis lives about 5 years, and it’s extremely difficult. So when I found out I was a match it was a no brainer.

I went through a few days of testing over several weeks, and they found me fit to donate. I was asked probably over billion times by my wife, Dave, and the doctors if I was sure I wanted to do it. I always felt peace about the decision so I never felt the need to waver. Throughout the testing I only told a few people about it. Mostly because I didn’t want to announce to the world that I was going to get tested to do something that statistically a long shot. But when I found out I was a match I still felt weird about telling people. I told a few friends about it, and of course my family.

Everyone was supportive, some apprehensive just for my safety, but very supportive. It was just something I knew I was created to do. I didn’t feel scared. I just felt like it was something I needed to do. Easy as that. I also had a friend, Cole Chesney, who had given a kidney to his Dad about 6 months earlier. Talking with him also brought peace.

Back to the morning of the surgery. God was with me. He just was. I arrived at the hospital and went back and put on one of those awkward hospital gowns. My wife and kids came to pray with me and be with me before I went back. A couple good friends, Jeremy Miller and Jason Smith, plus Amy, Dave, and one of his pastors were there to pray with me before I went back. It was one of those moments in life you will never forget. It meant the world to me for those special people to be there.

Shortly after that I was informed that the doctor was going to be late. This is typically a bad thing, but today it wasn’t. It allowed time for me to see my parents and sister before the surgery. The doctor was stuck in traffic or had car trouble or something, but that time was valuable. It gave me more time with my kids before as well which was really special.

The next thing I remember a couple nurses started prepping me for surgery and a nurse said, “Take this. These are the drugs your parents told you not to take” I chuckled and then I was out……….. I woke up in what I think was the same room, but could have been on a different planet for all I knew. I was high as a kite. I remember waking up talking. Just talking. The a couple nurses were there to make sure I was ok. No one I knew was there. They told me before surgery that family wouldn’t be able to come back to recovery, but at the time that didn’t matter. I started semi yelling for them to get my wife. After roughly 7 minutes of strange quasi yelling they went and got her.

For the next 30 or so minutes I continued talking. I guess this is what I do when I’m on these kind of drugs. My chosen topic was what I was thankful for. I rambled on about my wife and kids. My parents, brother, and sisters. Dave and Jenni (my in laws). My job at White Fields. My church. My podcast bros (DTD pod), and just how much I was thankful for everything. I remember this barely, but my wife continued to remind me of this.

After the initial wake up and drug induced ramblings some reality set it. This hurt. I couldn’t sit up. I’m super uncomfortable, mostly because of gas. (… on that.. To be able to see everything in my abdomen they had to blow it up with air.. this is what I was told.. so that’s where the gas came from.. they can’t get all the gas out after surgery) The gas can travel around your body, like a pain in your shoulder could be “gas pain” which is way different than the gas pain I was used to. I had several visitors that day. My parents and mother in law came to see me. Pastors and a few friends. An awkward encounter with another family member and I was ready to try and sleep.

I didn’t sleep at all the first night. I was on pain meds and binge watching Friday Night Lights on my phone, so not a horrible circumstance, but still I was in pain. I heard getting up and walking around is important so I tried to get up that night around 1:00am… but I guess the nurse was new and he didn’t have any clue how to help me up. After a few failed tries, I told him I’ll wait until tomorrow.

The next day I was able to get up. I walked a few laps and went to say hi to Dave who was down and across the hall. I also had several visitors. My wife of course. My friend Jay came, my aunt, and some other friends. It was nice. My friend Jason who came to visit also came that day. He brought me two gifts. One an Anthony Davis action figure, and book Outliers by Malcom Gladwell. He told me that what I did is going to define what it means to be a “Schlecht” for generations to come, and that what I did made me an “outlier” of a person. Those words meant so much to me. I will never forget that moment. I was weeping. Jason and I hadn’t been friends long. But God has a way of bringing people into your life when you need them. This is totally the case with Jason.

I got to go home after 3 days in the hospital. I remember feeling horrible when they told me I was good to go home. I thought, “WHAT?! I CAN’T POSSIBLY BE READY TO GO HOME YET?!” It was fine though. My wife came to get me, with a Braums chocolate malt in hand. You know I’m not feeling great when I don’t demolish a chocolate malt from Braums, but I wasn’t feeling well enough to drink it. But that is my wife. Always thinking of me.

I want to take a moment to brag on my wife, Amy Schlecht. She was incredible throughout this whole process. If you don’t know me at all, my wife and I have two kids (at the time 3 and almost 11 months). Taking care of young kids is tough. That may have been one of my only apprehensions about the whole thing, is the pressure it would put on my wife. I couldn’t pick up my kids or bend over for weeks. She would have to do it ALL, and she did. She did it with a smile on her face. She did it gracefully. She did it with a servants heart. I can never thank her enough for how she handled that month.

When I was home we had meals brought to us nearly everyday for a month. The response from our friends, coworkers, and family was astonishing. My friend Alex Speers even bought me the newest NBA 2k video game. He lives in Portland and had it shipped to me. He and my friend Luke Stephens came to visit me together. Two of my oldest friends. I’ll never forget that day for that and several other reasons I don’t care to share in this post.

Again… Jason Smith…. brought over another gift. If you know me at all you know I love basketball. NBA basketball to be exact, and if you could zero in on a player it would be Shaquille O’Neal. The gift was an entire box of unopened 1992 NBA cards. We sat and opened every pack. We laughed about players. We freaked out about players we loved, and overall just had a great time. Another thing (I feel like I say this a lot) I’ll never forget.

Something I wasn’t prepared for was the impact this would have on other people.. well besides Dave… There was an article printed in the Daily Oklahoman about the procedure so more people found out about it than I was truly comfortable with. This lead to an interaction with a neighbor. In fact with my next door neighbor’s friend.. So not even really my neighbor. I heard the doorbell ring and my wife had taken the boys down to our neighborhood pool. So I slowly got up and went to the door. There stood my neighbors friend who I only kind of knew. (back story. She was in a terrible accident about a year prior that kept her out of work and left her physically not the same… sad deal) She looked at me and started to cry. I was in a drug induced state at that point in time so I didn’t know what to do. She said to me, “What you did… gives me hope in the world again”… wow.. I had no idea how to respond. I think I said, “Really?” but then gave her a hug. I had no clue what God had in store. It was truly humbling.

Another story, but several months later. I work at White Fields. We are a home for abused and neglected boys ages 8-18. I am the education coordinator. One of my jobs is to teach our boys in the transitional classroom. All the boys there are not fit to be in public school. They are too violent, curse too much, won’t do their work, and bring a host of problems to the table. A particular boy did not like school when he came to us. In fact he hated it. Not only did he hate school… he hated me. For about a month he would refuse to work with me. He’d cuss me out daily. Try to hurt me. I tried everything I knew. I was out of ideas. I just thought if I stayed consistent it would pay off. One day I was beginning class and for some reason I opened up with, “Does anyone have anything they’d want to say before we start the day?”… this boy that hated me raised his hand, and I was like… oh boy… here we go… the words out of his mouth are some that…. wait for it… I’ll never forget. He said,

“You’re a good man Mr. Andrew”

I said…. huh? What are you talking about? Is this a prank? He replied that he heard what I did, and that he respected me for it. My relationship with this boy changed that day and that moment. I was able to form a good relationship with him. God had a plan.

A year later Dave and I are recovered from the surgery. Dave’s recovery was slower than mine, but overall he feels better than he has in years. At a recent appointment, he was told his labs looked like that of an 18 year old. Incredible. Dave and I were able to complete a 5K together in the fall, and in April my wife and I completed the Memorial half marathon. The only real ramification is I can no longer become a swim suit model. The scar left on my stomach isn’t terrible, but would take too much photo shop for me to pursue that career.

I want to encourage anyone who has thought about donating to do so. It will change your life and those around you for the better. You can help someone live a longer fuller life. Please call me if you have questions or doubts or anything. I’d love to talk about it. God is faithful.

Great is Thy faithfulness! Great is Thy faithfulness! Morning by morning new mercies I see. All I have needed Thy hand hath provided, Great is Thy faithfulness, Lord, unto me!

[thelittleredheadedmusician]

Cut the Death Jokes

For Day 6- Death of the Batfam Halloween Content War! Tim isn’t a big fan of the obligatory October death jokes. Special Guests Conner Kent/Kon-el, Bart Allen, Garfield Logan, Raven, and Rose Wilson! Rating: PG Gen Words: 2,202 AO3

Life was tough. Living as all the people you’re close to die? Even tougher. So when Halloween rolls around and the inevitable zombie jokes start rolling out from those who have came back Tim gets rather uncomfortable. It’s not that he begrudges them the ability to joke, if anything it’s a healthier-than-what-most-of-his-family-does coping mechanism.

It starts October first and Tim is glad that it’s at least Jason, who’s jokes about dying and being undead are a regular occurrence over Tim’s comms. He’s laying on his back on a couch in the manor’s living room when the older boy walks in. Jason takes one look at Tim and the bruise like circles under his eyes and grimaces. “Wow Replacement. You look about as good as me, which is to say corpselike.”

Tim frowns up at him as Jason smiles and continues to tease him. “I know you’re still trying to fill my pixie boots but being dead inside is enough, you don’t have to look the part too.”

Glaring Tim sat up, skootching back towards the armrest as Jason flops down by his feet. “Must you?” Tim asked acidly.

“Uh, duh? It’s my month man! October is prime time for the undead like me! I get to crack as many jokes as I want and no one can stop me.”

Tim frowned and turned to half watch the crappy horror movie that Jason had flipped on.

A couple days later Tim was nursing a large mug of coffee at the kitchen table while Dick argued with Damian over breakfast. Alfred had begrudgingly agreed to let Dick cook with his supervision and Damian was now staunchly refusing to eat it. Which Tim didn’t exactly blame him for; Dick’s pancakes were infamous.

“Grayson, I have died once and believe me I don’t need to do it again!” the younger boy yelled, brandishing a butter knife.

Dick just narrowed his eyes. “Rude.”

“Do you have to?” Tim muttered.

“What are you mumbling, Drake?” Damian spat.

“I said, do you have to? Make jokes like that?” Tim looked at his brothers wearily. He’d had a rough night breaking up a turf war in the East End and really didn’t need any emotional strain on top of the physical exhaustion.

“-tt- Drake it was only the truth. Grayson’s cooking is deadly and I do not wish to be subjected to it,” Damian said with a weird look.

From the stove Dick also raised an eyebrow at Tim. Taking a sip of his coffee Tim shook his head. “Whatever. Just ignore me,” he mumbled into his mug.

Titans weekend rolled around and instead of training they had all agreed to do some team bonding and in the spirit of Halloween Garfield had pulled out his and Victor’s combined horror movie library for the day. Tucked into a blanket burrito and squeezed between Bart and Rose on the couch Tim had started to doze off. The movies not holding his attention and the sounds of Cassie and Kon making dinner in the other room similar enough to home that it was becoming increasingly difficult for Tim to stay even remotely awake.

“That is disgustingly inaccurate,” Raven observed of the ‘demonic symbols’ on the screen. Tim cracked an eye open and had to agree. “Not to mention,” Raven continued. “That resurrection scene was beyond unrealistic.”

Tim made a face from his blanket cocoon. “Raven…” He half chided, half whined.

“Yeah Rae! It’s a movie! Just enjoy it!” Gar said, sticking his tongue out at her.

“As much I hate to say it, but I’m with Raven. This movie sucks,” Bart chimed in from beside Tim. “I think we could make a better one. I mean, some of us at least know what it’s like to actually die.”

Without a second thought Tim shot out his elbow, directly into Bart’s side. The speedster yelped and glared at Tim.

“Dude! What was that?!” Bart pouted, rubbing a spot just below his ribs.

Tim just glared back at Bart while on his other side Rose laughed. “That was the most aggressive passive aggressive thing I’ve ever seen the bird boy scout do and I am proud,” she said with a wicked grin.

Tim just snuggled deeper into his blankets while the others all gave him questioning looks.

Tim was having an average, boring Wednesday at work when he got a text from Cass. All it had was the house emoji and the ambulance emoji which meant that he was to come home right now because there was an emergency. Phone in hand Tim grabbed his keys and the suit jacket from the back of his office chair. He rushed past his secretary, mentioning that his sister needed him for some emergency before half sprinting to the elevator. On the ride down to the parking garage he texted Cass asking her for more details and just got the house emoji again.

He had barely parked his sports car in front of the manor before he was hurtling out of it and up the steps through the front doors. “Cass! Cass! Where are you? Cass!” Tim yelled, his dress shoes losing traction on the foyer’s marble floor causing him to skid to a haphazard stop at the base of the grand staircase.

His sister appeared at the top of the steps, a mischievous smile twisting her lips and her short hair sticking out at odd angles. She waved him up before disappearing back down the halls towards the little used west wing of the manor. Kicking off the cursed shoes Tim followed. She led him further up the manor’s numerous floors to a hall that dead-ended with a window overlooking the patio, pool, and sprawling grounds at the back of the house. Said window had been propped open and what appeared to be a zipline was stretched from the window to a tree at the edge of the property’s small forest.

Cass turned to him and her eyes sparkled. “Need a lookout,” she confessed, confirming Tim’s suspicions that Alfred had no knowledge nor approval of this particular adventure.

Tim’s shoulders slumped and his head dipped as he looked at Cass with a frown. He knew that she was getting every bit of annoyance, disbelief, and brotherly concern that his body was practically screaming at her.

Cass just giggled and shrugged. “You only live twice little brother.”

Tim let out a groan so dramatic it required him to fling his head back and go half limp. “Cass! Really? You’ve been hanging around Jason way too much. You should be better than this!”

“I know. I’m sorry. Just… couldn’t resist,” she admitted and patted his head in a half-hearted attempt to soothe him.

“You owe me.”

“I do. Love you brother,” she held out her arms for a hug and begrudgingly Tim accepted it. “Tis the season,” Cass whispered in his ear as they embraced.

“Don’t tell me about it,” Tim grumbled.

The jokes became increasingly worse and more frequent as the month progressed, Tim had taken to muting certain friends and family members on his comms when he needed to. Although he hadn’t figured out a way to mute people in person.

He was working with Steph on taking out Riddler and a group of his thugs on night. The quips and batarangs were both flying and Tim had to admit that he was having fun riffing off of Steph. Although that ended rather abruptly.

Steph was dodging punches and knocking guns away with her staff as she laughed. “Oh c’mon boys, you’ve gotta do better than that! I mean, the enthusiasm is appreciated but really? Death is very been there done that for me and you guys are just so uninspired with your attempts at killing me!”

“Batgirl!” Tim scolded as he punched a goon in the nose.

“What?” she asked genuinely confused.

“Do you have to? Like really?”

“Double R I have absolutely zero clue about what you’re talking about. So how about we work out whatever it is after the fight and not during? Kay? Kay.”

Tim just growled and started taking the thugs down faster and fiercer. Soon enough they had Riddler cuffed too and the GCPD was on its way.

“What was that about?” Steph asked as they stood on the roof of the neighboring warehouse, watching the cops stream into the building.

“Just, the death jokes. I dunno. They’re not exactly good taste?” Tim muttered, not wanting to meet Steph’s gaze.

“Dude. Seriously? Dead Robins Club bro. If we can’t make fun of it what can we do? S’not like we can go to therapy or something.”

Tim grimaced, he knew that but that didn’t mean it made him any less uncomfortable. “Just… Never mind. Forget I brought it up. I’m sorry.”

Steph gave him a weird look but her comms beeped and she put a hand to her cowl. “What’s up O?” She turned and began running toward the edge of the rooftop, off to whatever emergency Gotham was offering up now. At least it ended that awkward conversation.

It was the weekend before Halloween and Tim found himself in Smallville. Kon had been asked to take Jon trick-or-treating before going to Titans Tower and he had invited Tim to come with them. Which Tim soon learned meant that Kon needed his help in throwing together a last-minute costume to go out with Jon in.

Tim was laying on top of the worn quilt on Kon’s bed, staring up at the glow in the dark stars stuck to the ceiling while his friend googled quick costume ideas and raided his closet.

“Why don’t you just go as Superboy? It’s not like anyone is gonna be able to know whether you’re really Superboy or not,” Tim suggested.

“Trust me, I pitched that idea. Both Ma and Lois vetoed it faster than Bart eats pizza.”

Tim hummed noncommittally and continued to stare at the ceiling. That was until he got a balled-up Superboy t-shirt to the face. “Ow,” he said, sitting up.

“Use that giant brain of yours and help,” Kon said, gesturing around the small room. “What’re you being anyway?”

Tim held up the t-shirt that had just pelted him. “If you won’t be Superboy than I will.”

“Hardy har har. You wouldn’t let me wear your Red Robin suit?” Kon ventured.

Tim raised a single eyebrow. “A) you already know the answer to that. B) you’re a good four inches taller than me! You’d never fit and you know it.”

“Worth a shot.” Kon shrugged. “What about a zombie? I can rip up some clothes and put some fake blood on and I really am already a zombie so I could just walk around in my normal clothes… Tim? You ok?”

As Kon was talking Tim’s lips had smooshed togethering into an increasingly straightening line as his brows inched closer to each other. He was only half processing Kon’s words and was just staring at his friend without realizing that the other boy had stopped speaking. Kon waved his hand in front of Tim’s face and with that Tim exploded.

“Do you have to joke about that? I mean, ok you died and it sucked but like you’re not the only one and guess what. You came back! Which is a heck of a lot more than some people can say. And while you were dead how do you think everyone else was taking it? Cause let me tell you it sucks. Sucks! When your best friend dies and then your other best friend dies and then your ex-girlfriend and your mom and dad and step-mom and then your adoptive dad and your crabass little brother and the only reason you’re a part of the family in the first place is cause your older brother was brutally murdered but y’know he’s better now. Oh! And your sister at one point died and was resurrected and didn’t really see the point in bringing it up until like a year later? So yeah. It sucks. It’s a ‘coping mechanism’ or whatever but for the rest of us it’s just not funny.”

Tim had been pacing the room, arms flailing as he spoke. But now he collapsed back on Kon’s bed, breathing heavy as he tried to calm down.

Kon had flattened himself against the wall as he let Tim rant, eyes wide the entire time. “That- that was a lot man. Do you wanna talk about it?”

Tim let out a stuttering breath. “I think I’m good now.”

“That was a lot of pent up rage… How long has this been bothering you?”

“A while now? Just, all month it’s been really bad,” Tim shrugged. He looked down at his hands and felt Kon sit on the bed next to him before looping an arm over his shoulders.

“Well I promise to make a conscious effort to not crack undead jokes from now on and I’ll mention something to Bart. Deal?” Kon asked.

“Deal.”

“Good. Now help me with a costume or I am wearing your suit.” Kon grinned.

“Absolutely not!” Tim told him before holding up a flannel shirt. “Here, be a hipster.” That earned him another t-shirt to the face.

[blacknovelist]

I want some cute/fluff things to go awww for from the BNHA Ageswap AU, so let me here 'em! Tell us about some funny or adorable things that happened before the Canon of ageswap between the friends/former classmates/teachers when they dealt with younger siblings & brotherhood, a fire spitting baby and a telekinetic green haired girl that just lost her parents. Maybe not in that order. Chronological, if that is manageable. I want some dorky friends being friends and dorks while trying to manage.

bless your heart, fluff sounds wonderful right about now! :D Forgive me if this answer turns out entirely too long and incoherent, but I really like thinking about this stuff. 

so, like the Ageswap heroes, a lot of them when they graduated were more on line of like, just regular old friends. But there were certainly groups of them that were good close buddies together (i.e the Dream Team of Ageswap Uravity/Ingenium/Deku, who absolutely were besties, and also Kirishima and Bakugou were pretty alright with each other come grad time). Once their hero work started in earnest, it turned out their ties to each other was beneficial from time to time, so it drew them much closer together! Within just a few years of graduating, they’re much closer to the Family UA we know and love, but it isn’t until just a bit later that they get that final push.

(Putting the rest of it under the cut because while I answered your question and gave you some Fun Times, on a whole this answer turned into every conceivable fact and detail about the history of the Family UA squad and their adventures in childrearing, and also general silly things about Inko, Enji and Tensei because I could. Sorry - I hope you don’t mind, and that I more or less cover the stuff you’re really looking for!! This is going to be a record-setter as far as length goes, oh jeez.)

Most of the Ageswap Heroes work as just heroes for some time following their graduation, making names for themselves and rising through the rankings. Their jobs at UA don’t happen until a little further down the timeline, which I’ll elaborate on later.

Inko is the first to join the Ageswap UA fam, actually. Deku had been fighting some villains, a group they’d been tracking down for a good few months now - it’s the first time they’d been able to pin these guys, and it’s now or never to bring them in. Still, even in a two-on-five fight, Deku’s no pushover. It’s all going well until one of the villains whirls around, swings wide past the two heroes, and launches a hit straight at a building nearby. 

Someone screams. One of the others follows their comrade’s lead and takes potshots at people on the street, and the whole block just starts to crumble.

On that day, the pro-hero Deku breaks his self-imposed quirk limits (which are in place more for the protection of others than for his own sake at this point in time, in order to quickly subdue the villains so that he can call in rescue squads because they have civilians they need to save right this damn minute, come on!

He works in tandem with the rescue teams for hours. It’s the low burning kind of physical activity, the careful shift of debris and following the desperate yell of people, trapped and afraid and god, if only he could’ve ended the fight sooner-!

It’s not his fault, not entirely - he can’t be everywhere at once, with some villains engaging him and others going to wreak havoc, but though this isn’t the first time there may be casualties, it’s still hard. They’d been fighting in an area with plenty of offices and apartments, and though some had managed to evacuate, others had been unable to do more than lock themselves into their homes and hope for the best.

Deku sees something incredible and terrible, in the ruins of one of the apartment complexes. A married couple, crumpled cold and together beneath rubble, unseeing eyes locked on the ruined door frame. Above them, in the room they diligently guarded, chunks of wood and plaster and tile float harmlessly among stuffed toys and dolls. It’s like some kind of morbid baby mobile to entertain the slumbering infant, still unaware of the world around her.

(”Esper-like quirks,” they tell him later. “They used their quirks before death and tied them to the baby, and the strength of it caused their quirks to linger. We’ve never seen anything like it, but you found her just in time - the effects wouldn’t have lasted much longer.”

“That’s not true,” Deku doesn’t say when they leave, baby tucked into the crook of his arm, safe and sound and fast asleep. “I didn’t find her fast enough - her parents would still be alive if I had.”)

Izuku takes Inko in, after, because of a sense of duty. It was his fault, in a way, not stopping the villains fast enough, not finding Inko and her parents fast enough. When he returns home, the first thing he does is call Ochako, and explain everything. He wasn’t sure who else to call, he admits, and there’s probably someone else they know who would be better to call about this, but there’s a sleeping baby with dead parents in his hands that he’s just asked to have temporary custody over and dear god he’s got absolutely NO CLUE WHAT I’M DOING PLEASE H EL P ME

(he wants to do right by this baby, by god, but he’s not exactly built for this.)

Once she’s done laughing, Ochako pulls Tenya aside because as it turned out, she’d been with him at the time. Between the three of them, Deku buys a shit-ton of baby supplies, goes over the procedure for gaining legal custody of Inko, tells everyone that “yeah sorry I’ve got a kid now! ….surprise?”, and gets so many visits from everyone at this time like “damn, man, lookit u growing up so quick :’)”

The first year is an adventure, man. This is the first kid of the Ageswap UA squad, so, no one has any clue what their doing. Izuku gets lots of little “care packages” in the mail from everyone containing stuff that’s supposed to help him (by the second month he’s got two whole cabinets devoted to diapers, and he tells everyone to stop sending them already because god, guys, she’s one baby, come on). Eventually, with lots of trial and error, Izuku settles into something normal-ish with Inko, the custody goes through, and everything’s fine.

Then a year later, Tensei is born! Tenya, for his part, is ecstatic at his little brother’s birth, because of course he is, it’s his little brother! Everyone is invited to come meet his little bro, but only a few people can really make it - Uraraka comes, and though Izuku can’t make it in person, he skypes in with Inko and sends his love and wishes. Todoroki drops by with his significant other (who, for reasons, we aren’t elaborating on. I don’t really want to fridge them, but right now, that’s mostly what we’re doing with them), as well as most of the class at varying times because they need to travel to arrive where Tenya and his bro are, and sometimes that kind of time just doesn’t happen for a while. By the time Tensei is a year old, though, everyone has visited at least once! Bakugou’s visit only lasted a few minutes, but at least he showed up.

Tenya does his best to help his parents look after the newborn Tensei as the Iida fam figure out how to balance their hero duties with taking care of the baby. For a time, the Iida family ducks out of the limelight in order to focus on Tensei. When they have the time, the others come in to help after their first visits. It’s sporadic, but the Iida’s appreciate it a lot! Tenya and Izuku end up swapping a lot of tips and things between them at this time. 

So everyone’s time is like, majorly divided now. There’s hero duties to uphold, kids to look after, media hounds to dissuade from invading all parts of their personal lives, it’s a bit of a mess. Everyone wants the world to slow down a little at that point.

Which, of course, is exactly why the world decides it’s a fantastic time for Todoroki Enji to come into this world, screaming his little baby head off many miles away. It’s all a bit of a mess, really, because Inko is just barely past one year old, Tensei was born weeks ago, and now there’s little Enji in on it too! Poor Ageswap UA squad. 

As mentioned in a previous ask, it’s some time before the three babies meet each other face to face. But, that hardly means a thing in the wake of our favourite thing - CHILDREARING SHENANIGANS.

To make this quick, I’m going to provide slightly chronological details and anecdotes about these kids growing up and in general, about the Nineteen Adults who are Completely Winging This Every Step of The Way (feat. Tenya’s parents, who do know what they’re doing, Tsuyu, who also knows what she’s doing thanks to her siblings, and the sporadic and spread out conversations @guardianlioness and I have had on the subject of Fam 1-A raising the children):

Kirishima is a blessing to everyone throughout everything, honestly, he gets along so well with the babies and his power with toddlers is comparable only to Deku’s own power with them.

Tsuyu is wonderful at looking after babies too, and is a godsend whenever any of the three need to be looked after

Uraraka loves to come by and spoil Tensei and Inko with laughter and toys and playing and liberal (safe) use of some zero g’s when he was first born. 

Also, when Inko’s quirk manifested into her small-object attraction, Uraraka was ecstatic bc it’s a very floaty quirk.

Uraraka splits her time between visiting Tensei and Inko and Enji basically all the time, once Enji is born, and is a close second for the status of go-to babysitter (Tsuyu is admittedly in first whenever she’s in the country, because she’s just got good experience about it)

Tensei as a baby, for some reason, is quite fond of Sero! Though he tends to visit a bit less as far as the regular visitors go, because of, you know, hero-ing.

Dark Shadow takes a shine to Inko when Tokoyami passes through to say hello. He swears up and down Inko (who at the time was like, maybe under a month old) babbled something that sounded suspiciously like “birdie” and no, of course he isn’t happy about that, he’s no common bird! (Try telling that to Dark Shadow though, who is perfectly content with the nickname)

On the reg, though, because I’m tired and describing how every baby reacts to everyone would get repetitive real quick, it’s just facts that basically everyone gets along with the children well enough? There really isn’t anyone who doesn’t help out at some point or who was bad with the three kids, and all of them love their many aunts and uncles (even if some of them won’t acknowledge or admit it)

Tensei, surprisingly, was fussiest as a baby, though he mellowed out with age. He’s followed by Enji and Inko as far as baby rankings go. Enji was a damn hellion during the toddler stage though, and Inko had some trouble around the same age.

Frankly, and pardon my language, everyone fucking loves Inko basically instantly once Izuku takes her in, even if they first meet her over video call. She’s cute as a button when she’s a baby, all rounded face and tufts of long hair and lots of smiles and laughs and gosh, how is it possible for a baby to be this adorable?? We Just Don’t Know.

Once he’s over his panic, Izuku does well by Inko, though he’s still a bit awkward. He’s nothing before the power of a baby, tbh but compensates through sheer Dad Ability. When it comes to little kids and toddlers though?  Izuku is a literal godsend. His wonderful skills were definitely put to a lot of use around the terrible toddler times (often through video call for Enji, though there were times he would drop by and visit in person if he was in the area while on the job.)

Izuku’s ability with kids and toddlers has a lot to do with Enji’s respect for his uncle actually - he’s one of the few people Enji listens to on a regular basis, and whose opinion he trusts, and one of the only people he’ll actually listen to (which causes trouble during his time at UA, but that’s much further down the line)

Everyone has had a go at babysitting each of the trio at least once in their lives, to varying degrees of success. 

On related and unrelated notes respectively, Aoyama and Hagakure aren’t allowed to babysit without at least one other responsible person present at the time. Also, Sero and Kaminari aren’t allowed to babysit Tensei as a kid without supervision (together or individually), and Enji goes through a minor phase where he refuses to allow any of his uncles to look after him for completely unknown reasons to everyone else

(it’s because he’s worried that if his uncles look after him too much he’ll start treating his aunts funny like how the stupid kids at school treat girls funny sometimes for child logic reasons, and Enji is too smart a kid to think that treating his aunts with anything but respect is a bad move. As a result, during this time, he spends as much time with his super strong aunts as he possibly can to remind himself to never go down that road, until he realizes that of course spending time with his uncles wouldn’t change anything, duh! They’re just as afraid and respectful of the women in his life as he is, and with due reason. And so, everything returns to normal again.)

Inko’s quirk is the first to come in at the tender age of 8 months, and caused a little bit of chaos when it did. It starts with her picking up the teddy bear that fell out of her bed while Izuku is bending down to pick it up for her, which scares the shit outta him. He’s extra careful not to leave small and potentially dangerous things (like screws or something) lying around where she might be able to pick them up with her quirk.

Second is Enji, who gains his at one year and two months. His manifestation comes in the form of him completely setting his head and hair on fire, leading to a long fifteen minutes of confirming Enji is perfectly okay frantic phone calls, emergency skype video calls, the copious use of google, and Shouto frantically trying to get his son to put out his quirk without hurting him before his son accidentally burns their entire house down (which he barely manages).

incidentally, Enji only loses control of his quirk as a baby - his control doesn’t waver after that, until many, many years later when he’s attending UA.

Tensei’s quirk manifests a bit before his second birthday in an uncontrollable burst of exhaust that sends the little boy’s face into the early birthday cake the Iida family bought in a rare moment of free time for all of them. Bless his heart, Tensei only laughs as they clean him up and deem the cake salvageable (and they send many profuse thank-you’s to everyone who had the foresight to send them tips on how to cushion everything and send their boy plenty of helmets)

They start learning self-defense when they’re around five years old each, though mostly minor basic things that wouldn’t hurt them or anything, you know? Everyone wants to make sure they can take care of themselves, whether they go on to be heroes or not. (This is why Inko’s prowess in fighting can match that of 1-A when quirks aren’t involved).

The first time Inko and Izuku visit her parent’s graves, Inko is three. She brings a handful of flowers her dad let her pick at the park (and one of which they bought impulsively after seeing it in the window of a shop), and spends hours laughing and telling them stories about her day, and how much fun her aunts and uncles are (”Auntie Ocha taught me how to a somersault in zero gravity last week!” “Wait, Ochako did what-”) and how much she loves her dad. Izuku swears he isn’t crying when he tells Inko’s parents about Inko and her studies and what a wonderful, beautiful daughter they’ve managed to create and how happy he is he can take care of her, really.

that’s a lie, of course he is, really, who do you think we’re talking about here

Inko has always known that she isn’t Izuku’s biological daughter. Izuku has always wanted to be very open that he loves her so, so much and is sorry he couldn’t save her parents when she was a baby, because it was important to him that she know about the two noble people who spent the last moments of their lives making sure she survived. 

When Inko is four, just before they move to one of the wards closer to Enji and Tensei and everyone, Izuku asks Inko about her taking on his last name and him officially adopting her (at this time she’s his ward and he’s only got custody/guardianship of her). He refrained from just going through with it because he wanted to be Inko’s choice, instead of making it for her. She accepts immediately and affectionately refers to the night her paperwork went through as “Family day” (which instantly becomes a shared Ageswap Fam Holiday and day of celebration, naturally)

Tensei and Enji have no clue that Inko isn’t Izuku’s biologically and don’t actually learn this detail until they’re students at UA. In their defense, it kind of wasn’t their fault (though they’ve got their physical differences, Inko and Izuku share an uncanny resemblance for sharing absolutely no blood whatsoever) as everyone forgot to tell them in general, but it doesn’t make a difference because Inko is still family, after all. 

Though, it does explain Family day a little bit, when they explain that it was the day he legally adopted her way back when.

Tensei is a bit of a mischievous little spirit, he is, but I’m sure we all know that. Left to his own devices, his curiosity and desire to do really awesome cool things (in traditional kid form) lead him into some pretty ridiculous situations.

He and Enji grew up in about the same(ish) area, so as toddlers they spent a lot of time together, which did help. Sometimes, they’d go out and get into the kind of dumb situations only kids can get into except twofold because there’s two of them to lead to extra trouble, because of course they would 

both refuse to disclose the details of what is loosely referred to as “the cat and chick incident”, and since the only thing any of their guardians ever heard about it was the aftermath… god only knows 

Enji, as a kid, was very standoffish and very prideful over his quirk. He was cordial with Tensei and Inko, at the least, and both have his respect, but man, was he ever bad at making friends.

Still, for all his vices, he was still a kid. It’s not often, but if you ask Shouto at the right moment in time, he’ll show you all the photo albums he’s kept of his boy growing up. A fan-favourite series of pictures is of Enji having fun at the fair with all the cotton candy and ferris wheel and roller coaster rides his little heart could ever desire. Enji vehemently denies the legitimacy and existence of those photographs at all possible times.

Inko and Tensei get on like a house on damn fire, the devil duo they are. Not that any of their parents ever learn the full details of their antics, since Inko is much better at hiding her tracks than she really has any right to be frankly

The only time they were caught is the time they were going to have Tensei distract some bullies while Inko floats water balloons over their heads, to trick them into thinking they were haunted and maybe get them to stop being jerks. Instead the water balloons go to the noble cause of becoming ammo in a massive water fight that they somehow manage to drag Tenya, Enji and Shouto into, and the parents get some tips that lead to stern talking-to’s and the end of bullying in their area. It’s great all around.

The reason why Inko wants to become a doctor focused on hero medicine is because of the aftermath of the ShigaDeku fight, in pre-canon. Izuku had to go through a great deal of physical therapy and impose a limit on his use of One For All because of the results of the fight and, well, Inko of course took it upon herself to make sure her dad took good care of himself in the aftermath, you know? Eventually she realized that if she became a doctor, she’d have the knowledge to better help her dad along with all the other heroes out there keeping them safe. Thus, doctor Inko was born!

A lot of the Hero squad associate with UA and became teachers for the kids, tbh. Seeing them grow up right before their eyes… it kind of puts things into perspective, how they grow and change and work towards their dreams just like they all once did! Still, not everyone was suited to teaching (and some of them have specialties that are in high demand in the hero industry), which is why some of the squad only really come on as guests and substitute teachers from time to time (such as Ochako)

Once in a blue moon, Shouto and Enji will spend the entire weekend together. These weekends are difficult, sometimes, as their relationship is rocky, but Enji will never admit how much he treasures the times he gets to sit down on the couch with his dad and fall asleep there, knowing he’ll still be home when he wakes in the morning.

When Inko is old enough to cook, there are times Inko and Izuku will argue over who gets to make breakfast that morning. It’s a toss of the coin as to who wins each time

Tenya and Tensei don’t get to hang out often, but one constant ritual between them is when they slouch in the living room and do pretty much whatever. Sometimes Tenya will have paperwork and Tensei will be playing video games, or Tenya will be texting Ochako (who is inevitably bothering him about hanging out with him and Izuku sometime soon) while Tensei eats dinner, and that kind of stuff. It’s nice to bask in the presence of the other and when Tensei feels negative/volatile but doesn’t want to be in his room (or doesn’t want to be alone), he’ll gravitate to the living room automatically.

Tensei’s greatest hero has always been and always will be his brave older brother, who always follows the rules and is full of nothing but enthusiasm and the desire to see the world thrive by saving lives and keeping others safe.

The one and only time Inko, Tensei and Enji teamed up in any sort of incident-slash-adventure was when they were about eight years old, in which they discovered a sturdy but abandoned shopping cart in an alleyway one day. Naturally, they decided Experiments Must Be Conducted and subsequently learned that when all three of their quirks are paired together, they’re freaking unstoppable

(the gist of what happened is Inko would move or topple obstacles over so the cart could make it past them, Tensei would power them forward uncontrollably, and Enji would use his fire to let them make sharp turns or brake sharply since Tensei’s quirk didn’t let him do that. They may have unwittingly made local news in the process and gotten into so much trouble afterwards, but it was totally worth it.)