#bro doesnt even need a podcast

[wafflesfan]

I think obsessed over them being affectionate help

[romsabombs]

malevolent part 46 the unclean live listen notes

SPOILERS BELOW

faroe jumpscare

is she haunting him lol

i cant believe he slept

"its probably an animal" u guys keep forgetting what podcast you're in

"you were sleeping?" "NO👹" defensive for no reason

stop hiding things from eachother challenge impossible

"it was just Things" 😐

what is blud yapping about😭🙏

LILY MENTIONED‼️

yeah yeah we know john we were all there🙄

cheesy ass episode where are the horrors

TRAIN STORY CALLBACK :33333

u dont have to remind me this story is bouncing around in my brain at all times

ooohh okayyyy music

arthur is not registering any of this let the man sleep💀

john praising lily for just doing her job is so funny to me

omgg :3 faroe is hanging out

no its not malam his ass doesnt sound like that

is he not even considering that it could be faroe usually he jumps at any chance to mention her

its disney pixar movie brave

shes guiding him?? showing him the way??

do u think they're fae

oh hes being compelled

"we shouldnt just sit here" ya thatd be a boring episode

hes fighting it

they're fae i faer

maybe just go the opposite direction

"what We're seeing" ok arthur

oh ermm😕😕

ANOTHER CULT??? COME ON😐😐

omg crying obsidian literally minecraft

oh dear a child. oh nvm He

its that dead child in the river isnt it

HAHA HE ROBBED THEM

arthur what happened to your decluttering mindset

HAHA YORRICK💀💀💀 they kidnapped his ass

oh his ass gonna is snitch on us

👹fuck mother darkness👹

"as unfortunate as that is" 💀

what makes u think he didnt lie to you about being the last of his kind

"we wouldn't be walking into a trap BLINDLY" "we'd be walking in with MY EYES wide open"

yorrick if you dont rat us out we'll buy you a lego set😇😇 or a chew toy

bro just dont follow him hes obviously just using the bag to bait you

ok dont get the bag guys r u dumb

STUPID!! DONT!!!! ☠️😠 guys i cant keep defending you

they will not ignore the lights bruh🙏

god we're only 19 minutes in

they're gonna die from this bruh

goddamn it john��

oh no💀💀💀 man come on

they're cooked🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏

wait is it actually okay i cant tell anymore

oh😕😕😕 BLERGH☹️☹️

naur the hunt got to him🙏

idk wtf is going on anymore bruh

okay ya its still a trap

dont drink that fucking water bruh i bet his corpse was in there

ofcourse it looks inviting bruh💀💀

they're what

💀💀 HAHA HE LEFT dumbasses

funny as hell now what

DONT DRINK IT HAHA ARE U CRAZY

it looks inviting again huh😐😐

NOOOOO💀💀 jarthur needs a babysitter bruh

"it leads men astray" only men huh😐 god forbid women have hobbies

HEART OF THE FOREST MENTIONED‼️‼️‼️‼️

they're trying so hard to be otgw

IN THE DREAMLANDS?

YEAHHHHH

omg i knew it'd come back

no guys maybe it's the same forest remember when u gave it your finger n u actually didnt need to and u said Lets hope they'll pay us back

FAE FAE FAE THEYRE FAE💥💥

mushroom smell is a core memory for him💀💀

HAHA WTF sillyness

william mentioned

what is his ass yapping about 😭

is this still a trap wtf r these mushrooms doing to him💀

hes dancing???? naur what the hell

hes cooked the fae got to him💀🙏

music is distorting ermmm😕

blud snorted too many mushrooms

WHAT?????? not the traumadumping

madness madness madness

man what the hell

☹️☹️☹️☹️☹️☹️

man i thought he had a relatively good relationship with his dad😕

YOU DID WHAT😨😨

WHAAAT WHAT THE FUCK MAN

did the dancing exhaust him

😕 man what the hell was that

what the hell wait what now

its the king isn't it

this eppy is crazy man ill kms

the fae got to him‼️🗣️🗣️

EVERYONE SPEAKS IN YOUR VOICE BRUH THERE IS ONE VOICE

what is going on bru

WHO?? 🗣️ horick???

was the shrine for him then

bro is bargaining💀

wuh oh😕

WHAT😨😨😨

YOUNGER????? not again arthur💀

once a child murderer always a child murderer

is arthur pulling this guy's chain bru

nah he was definitely lying right😕

fym "what are you doing" what are YOU doing

he what. he slept?? i think arthur was just pulled away from him so he was like. unconscious?? maybe

they just keep making secret deals with evil gods🙄

oh man hes so ashamed

john trying to have a moment with him and getting shot down again

so whats the plan here are you just gonna go back to killing children

"us" hmmmmmm

hes definitely not gonna tell john abt the deal

oh he did. but not about the child part

YEA THE CORPSES RIGHT

yess i was right💥💥💥💥

yeesh😕

i like how in audio dramas the throwing up sound is always just some tin foil getting squeezed

what an episode. i have to pee so bad

MMMM REALLY not liking the theme im seeing in this season (children)

[bulbabutt]

ok. elephant in the room or shit i thought about a while ago but didnt post, my going theory on the rise cancellation which idk if its a theory more-so as reading the room and putting the pieces together.

it seems like playmates fault to me on account of the toys being shit and then cancelled outright. like waves of toys ready to go in 2019, none saw the light of day.

obvs a lot of them were shit, not the point. the point being theres up to 6 waves of toys on the table at 2019 toy fair, only 1 and 2 were made. compare to the last toyfair showing the mutant mayhem toys.

playmates made both of these era of toys. do you see how much more effort went into one than the other. you can say movies are more popular blah blah blah. but playmates has made ALL tmnt toys since they ever existed, and comparing the rise toys to even the previous shows toys it seems obvious where they put the money.

anyway my theory here is playmates got told (or given or offered or whatever) mutant mayhem. they immediately went. oh. yeah this will make us money. lets start prepping moulds for this now, lets get ready to sell a shit ton of different stuff. and they just left all those rise things on the cutting room floor. they didnt tell anyone on the team they were gonna do that. they didnt say "yeah it doesnt matter what you do cuz we have this NEW thing coming" they just abandoned it. they pretended theyd give it a chance to come back if their movie went well just to appease them and us, cuz they saw more money elsewhere.

the dumb shit about that is like imagine saying that about like. batman or the avengers or something. yeah we wont make this cartoon anymore cuz we have a theatrical movie coming in 3 years. like. you can have more than one iteration YOU DID IT WITH 12.

truly this is nothing against mutant mayhem by all accounts it looks amazing, my point here is that im sick of playmates fucking over each tv show with their stupid hunks of plastic. it has in fact happened each time, rise was just faster

87 was good, then there were the 90s movies that got popular enough that the show needed to be closer in style to.

03 was good, then it got dark, told to be more fun (cuz kids like ben 10 now) so they made fast forward, which was also good but in its own way, but then tmnt 2007 came out and playmates literally said "nope nope, we want to save on moulds so change your show to look like this movie" then 07 didnt go well cuz warner bros didnt fucking market it (what i heard from a podcast w nolan north was that they were super preoccupied marketing the shit out of 300 at the time. which. ok very weird choice for kids toys)

then we have 2012 after nick buys the franchise. and 12 has the weird tonal dissonance of dark stuff and kid stuff, with the most "designed to be toys" characters in it, clearly messing w things in the show itself while it was going.

then bayverse comes out along side it and once its over we get rise, where the designs clearly take inspiration from that movie (donnie and raph specifically)

then mutant mayhem is announced and rise just. fades out of existence. planned seasons cut and cancelled. planned toys disappear.

anyway. none of those shows are bad. none of the movies that come out along side them are bad. its just the dumbassery of like. not being allowed more than one iteration at a time, and its nOT on account of popularity or brand synchronizing like youd think, its literally to not have to make as many DIFFERENT SHAPED hunks of plastic! its fucking stupid. rise's downfall seems to be POOR FUCKING PLANNING on playmates part for THEIR shitty toys and then also being cheap/unwilling to have TWO DIFFERENT KINDS OF TOYS AT ONCE (proof being the 03/07 thing)

anyway. thats my theory or whatever that fills me with rage. i hate playmates and i think its insane that the downfall of rise literally comes down to two stupid companies and their desire to sell garbage to children.

[imeverywoman420]

we need to oppress metrosexual men/dandies. No those arent precious gender nonconforming boyssss. Metrosexual men are sassy misogynistic “masculine” presenting HEAVY quotations and they wanna be like gym bros but theyre “sensitive”. Or podcast men. Guys that are like “look at me haha im a funny little guy haha give me attention”. Men that dress like 80s sex offenders and listen to harry styles.

Basically- men that want to be treated like big strong man and feels entitled to that but he doesnt even try to “act like a man”. So instead of saying he wants a subservient gf he says he wants a goth mommy gf same thing. He wants gender roles when it suits him. Thats why he thinks women should handicap themselves so his ego doesnt feel threatened.

[reserved-system]

WOAH!! HEY GUYS I JUST READ YALLS JON IN HERMITCRAFT FIC AND LIKE !!!!!! WOAHEOAHWOAH!!!! VERY COOL!!!!

i havent even listened to magnus archives yet [its literally the next podcast im planning to listen to dw] but i am obsessed with this fic. its actually so cute despite the poor guy being in distress most of the time.

i will now theorise and talk about ur fic in ur ask box if thats ok sjdbhdhdhhedjbdjdb

🤔🤔 i wonder why jon was put for a day instead of respawning immidiately? maybe the server was struggling to connect him for the first time or somethin? or xisuma was tryin to block him or somethin? idk, itd be funny if it was The Universe forcing him to get some sleep for once. actually yea i hope thats it.

itll be very funny [or angsty depending on how yall spin it] to see jon realise that death is a consequence-less action in this world, either he watches someone die or dies himself. bros in shock like,,,, my brother in christ i just witness a death 😱😨😱☹️😟😱, but then the person rematerialises in a nearby bed like,,, a second later like,,,, oopsie daisies 😅😅 just got pranked and exploded along side my house 😝😝 mustve been that pesky bird 🤭🤭🤭 I'll be back, just have to collect my stuff 😮‍💨😮‍💨 and jons sitting there like (,,#ﾟДﾟ)

BAHAHAHA if jon was shocked at the ears and tail on ren then i cannot wait to see his reaction to doc adfsfjakggkagkkgaakgagakg

*clapping!!* Cub!! my favourite basement dweller!!

Omg i didnt even Think of how people casually talking about mining for supplies would sound!! very thoughtful on yalls part :D

Woooo!!! map mechanics!!!!

also!!! cub saying that jon would make it to Tangos by sun set IF he doesnt get lost feels like,,,,, foreshadowing,,,, where jon gets lost and has to deal with zombies and skeletons and spiders™️ 👀👀👀 bro will not survive the night sjdbjdbdhdhd

lmao no pressure to answer this but just know that i very much enjoyed the reading !!

WAAAHHHH JBSDJGBJDG Hi! I'm sorry, we were not expecting to wake up to anything this morning. We are extremely flattered!! We're going to try to talk/answer any of your questions or theories without spoiling anything we have planned but firstly! You should definitely listen to The Magnus Archives it's such a good podcast. You don't have to worry about our fic containing spoilers for any of the events in the podcast (to my knowledge, at least. Anyone is free to correct me).

____ 1) Our main reason for having him wait a day before respawning was so THIS MAN COULD SLEEP. This man hasn't had a proper 8 hours of sleep in weeks at this point and needed the rest. The Universe spoke and said he needs to sleep.

2) We're actually going to start to explore people dying in the next chapter and we are VERY very exciting to start on that. What I think will be funny even going forward is seeing how terrified Jon is of seeing people die verse how laid back the hermits are about it. Cause realistically this is what, their ninth season so I'd say they're pretty desensitized to it.

3) I think about his reaction to Doc a lot cuz here comes this shirtless creeper goat cyborg with crocs. IT'S JUST TOO PERFECT. We haven't pin pointed when we're going to introduce the two but when we do it's going to be so much fun to write.

4) Cub <3 <3 <3 So far Cub has been our favorite hermit to write cuz he's just so chill. He could say the most out there sentence and you'll be looking at him and he's just got a blank expression. You'll look at him like did you not just hear what came out of your mouth and he'll look like he's said nothing wrong. Love his guy

5) It's just a few things we think about the difference between hermits and non hermits. For hermits mining for resources is an (at least) a once a week things. Non hermits haven't needed to mine for resources by hand since what, since heavy machinery was introduced on the scene. So it's not something they think about unless their job is to mine for those resources / work those heavy machines.

6) I wouldn't say it's foreshadowing but mainly a light jab at Jon cuz maybe he looks like the kind of guy who you'd give him simply directions and he still gets lost.

(We are those people. Driving downtown is confusing even with a gps)

But yes, maybe Jon does have an encounter with some mobs later on. Who's to say? Hehe.

Anyways, I'm super glad that you've been enjoying our fic so far! Super exciting to get back to writing it more often now that we have a lot more free time.

Hope you have a good rest of your day/evening <3

-Xavier

[oriigirii]

Streamer MC headcannons with the brothers 💞

"You were quite a known face on social media back in the human realm, playing games, doing unboxings, just vibin in general, fans around the globe looked forward to your streams a lot! However, considering the sudden (unannounced) invitation to the exchange program, you had to leave all of that behind out of the blue. It wasn't as bad at first, but you have to admit you do miss the feeling of being able to do goofy shit online. Luckily for you, with the advance technology of Devildom and some spicy magic, the internet had synced with the human realm, and thats when you decided to finally re-enter the streaming scene. How will the brothers react upon seeing your peculiar past time?"

Head empty, No thoughts aside from the brothers just bothering the MC while they stream so here you go haha

Warnings: None, just crackhead energy and a lotta mispellings

Gender: Neutral!

Hotel: Trivago

* [ ಠ╭╮ಠ ] Lucifer *

{How did he know about your career?}

I honestly don't see him as someone who goes on the internet a lot

(He screams boomer to me, change my mind)

He doesn't have the time either, he's too focused on work!

So him finding out is gonna take a while

But! He did find out the hard way when shrilled screaming was heard from your room when he was passing by with some paper stacks in his arms (courtesy of Diavolo)

This man felt his instincts kick in, he ran as fast as he could, papers forgotten, and he immediately slammed your door open. Splinters scattering around, your door definitely damaged, as his eyes held a glare and his demon form was out, wings spread in a threatening display.

He was ready to beat someone's ass as he had thought someone had hurt you in here.

But all hes met with is you, infront of your chair and PC, and a game over on the screen...

To say he was unamused was an understatement cause you just lost your internet priviliges for giving him a heart attack (He said it was because you were being rowdy and noisy but with what you saw you knew that wasn't the case)

Good luck tryna puppy-eye your way to his heart to let you continue streaming lol.

If by some miracle you managed to wriggle your rights back from his hands, he'd warn you not to be so loud next time.

You already learnt your lesson though~ (Hopefully)

{How does he feel about your streams?}

Not everyone's the same, so if you were the shy soft streamer who does more art streams or something akin to a podcast, you can bet that Lucifer will be putting you on while he works, he kinda knows your streaming schedule at this point and if you were running late, he'd force one of his brothers to take over your dish washing duties or any chores you were stuck with

If you were the loud obnoxious meme type, hed still try to watch out of curiosity, and as much as he appreciates that you were getting comfortable here in Devildom with how you laugh and joke around, he still can't approve of it. Its too loud, its much like his brothers energy and he has enough of that already, so he probably doesn't watch as much.

He has countlessly came to your room to shush you and at this point your fans had made a compilation of each time Lucifer had barged in to tell you off

Look he likes it when you scream, but not when hes in the middle of work okay--

At this point, chat has deemed Lucifer as dad and you as their mom/dad.

If he ever catches wind of this he'd definitely be teasing you in private for centuries to come.

Overall fine with it, as long as don't do something stupid on stream.

* ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ Mammon*

{How did he know about your career?}

I would say he found out by him crashing into your streams midway but that's too predictable, hence why you've Mammon-proofed your bedroom during streaming hours!

Thanks to our wizard daddy, you have managed to cast a simple lock spell on your door and as well as a sound proofing

You love your broke idiot, but you did wanna keep the tone of your stream today a bit more chill, you wanted to have a proper Q&A with your fans to hopefully clear any bad vibes around your 3 month disappearance.

When Mammon has learnt your door was locked he definitely was a bit pissy, he knocked on your door loudly even and was calling out for you to let him in, but to no avail.

Bro he's scared.

He usually was allowed to enter, and you usually answered if you did need to be left alone for a bit, so just leaving him hanging got his mind racing and he had to press up his ear on the wooden door to try and hear if you were okay

When this continues on he finally resorts to getting help, but the only one in the house ws Levi, so he kicks down HIS door.

Levi boutta summon Lotan for interrupting him honestly

But as Mammon exclaim you weren't answering and he worried for your wellbeing, Levi rolls his eyes and scoffs,

"Idiot Mammon, they're streaming don't bother them…"

Streaming? why didn't you tell him???

Rude much.

He did huff and now was forcing his way to use Levi's PC for a moment

Can Levi stop him?

Nah.

He was busy on his console, and if he stood up now hed be breaking his world record so he was at a terrible state so he just resorts to threats of him drowning the Avatar of Greed if he does anything stupid on his PC.

He immediately logs in to your streaming platform and he watches for a bit,

You were more dolled up now just to look decent on stream, and he felt this jealousy rise as you interact with your chat, especially to those saying I love you's and stuff, and you even said it back? the audacity! You were his werent you? Were you replacing him with these nobodies?

He huffs as he realized that those who paid got their message highlighted, and thus, he starts donating. (Mind you this was Levi's account...)

"Mcccccc Open the dooorrr"

"Ill behave i promiseeeee"

"Cmon pleaseeee?"

Chat is c o n f u s i o n

NGL, they thought Mammon was a creepy stalker and red flags were being waved everywhere

but as chat was pondering who the hell he was, you can only sigh and look at the camera with that unamused expression, but ugh! you just KNOW hes doing that kicked puppy expression of his, and maybe it really wont be so bad

So you snap your fingers and say, "Okay MonMon, its open, Im giving you 3 seconds"

Mammon wasnt deemed to be the fastest out of his brothers for nothing

As soon as you got to '2', you were already tackled by the white haired male and chat went wild.

Now that you've shown your life in Devildom, maybe its time to introduce chat to your boyfriend no?

{How does he feel about your streams?}

You get paid to sit infront of a camera, do I have to say anything else?

But really though, as much as he enjoys the thought of getting so much cash from something so simple, he prefers the joy of being able to proudly exclaim that he was your first man!

ohhhh he thrives on the salt of your overly attached stans

but for those who fully support you, he always feels so mushy and shy when they say the ship you guys so hard

The fanarts has him WEAK (he may or may not have saved a few)

You usually do streams alone, but now you've allowed the door to be left open to let Mammon join whenever

Chat pogs when he enters with so much confidence, only for it to crumble when you kiss his cheek on stream.

Overall finds it fun to spend time with you, but just dont play scary games cause Lucifer might hang him upside down on stream.

* ▘▂▝ Leviathan*

{How did he know about your career?}

He is honestly the most attached to his D.D.D and he catches wind of almost anything going down in the internet, so your 'revival' being hyped up was something he definitely saw and he was just s wo o o ned

His Henry 2.0? a famous streamer?

Were you truly a blessing gifted upon him or was he dreaming?

He definitely didn't bring it up at first as he didn't wanna make it a big deal, but you notice hes been more in his head lately, and you have tried asking him what it was but to no avail.

You have to corner this little snake if you want answers and he eventually admits that he knew of your persona online and was incredibly shy to ask you to stream with him

He's a streamer himself afterall but maybe he doesnt stream as much as you do nor does he have as large of a following, so his intrusive thoughts attacked him and made him think that maybe since he wasnt as famous he didnt deserve to be in the same stream as you

Please tell him to join you and gib him kiss U3U

He'll absolutely m e l t

But now, as you make the announcement to your viewers and Levi to his, the internet explodes as a special collab stream was hapening between the expert gamer and avatar of envy of Devildom along with the beloved exchange student and streamer of the human realm

Your usual viewers reach between 10-15k, but as you start stream, that number boosts higher and beyond

Before streaming though, Levi was incredibly nervous, he'd picked the games for you to play that he knew you would enjoy with him, but his mind kept racing about whatthe fans thought, he didnt wanna disappoint them

But you had to remind him that whatever they say will not matter in the end as this was merely for fun, this was YOUR stream and you guys were gonna do what you want and nobody can have a say on it. (Maybe except Lucifer)

You usually talk for him with your bubbly personality, and to calm his nerves, he hs your pinky wraped around his where the camera can't see it.

Regardless, his thoughts subsided as you two delve into your stream that lasted a solid 7 hours, you definitely promised your chat that you and Levi will be doing more streams together from now on.

Once the cameras cut and yall are left alone, Both of you collapse on bed, and despite you being asleep already, Levi was just far too giddy as everything dwells on him.

Having a player 2 by his side now had never felt so intoxicating and he as just so lucky to have you.

{How does he feel about your streams?}

He obviously adores it, although some streams he wouldnt join just so he can play games on his own

He's still an introvert afterall, he needs his alone time

But he prefers that alone time with you, his Henry.

So when youre about to go stream, he kinda becomes a bit pouty, but with a simple promise of kisses (and maybe even more if youd like) he would let you go, but his attention would disappear from his game altogether.

He might just end up watching you instead

May or may not, at some point, just chat you and ask if its too late to join you

You do allow him to join you and play from the comforts of his room as both of you can simply play via internet, you give him the comfort to not turn on his mic or webcam either and you have no idea how he appreciates that.

Will definitely fight someone online when they start claiming you as theirs (-cough- stans) Please make sure it doesnt escalate to him summoning Lotan

Although the comments would often get to him, and as much as he can fight them online, he still does find himself pondering if they were true, so you need to give him a lotta lovin and reminder that he is your player 1 and no one else can ever fill that place.

------

Wow 3 brothers this time, what an improvement, anyways hope yall enjoy! I think its pretty clear who I simp for depending o nthe length of each lol, but do let me know if you guys want a part 2 for the rest of the brothers, or even the undateables!

[wizkiddx]

join my taglist 🤍

master list

TOM

~ just for the record - tom gets caught preparing for a very big moment

~ slow burn - early morning workouts are your way of befriending your costar, even if it’s more like torture

~ you're still creepy bro - Tom turns into the readers knight in shining armour when they get ill during promo

~ 3 hearts broken [part 1] [part 2] [part 3] - an argument between you and tom, except it takes him hurting someone else for you to loose it

~��‘it’ couple - fluffy blurb- Tom’s not-so-subtle physical affection doesnt go unnoticed by the media

~ hanging high - fluff, actress!reader and tom hungover and on a flight, that's abt it

~ just letting you know - Tom’s terrified to ask your dad a very particular question question

~ reasons why I hate the spiderboy - the father of the brides wedding speech

~ work with me - when tom doesn’t take advice and ends up very ill, very far from home, there’s one person whose stuck dealing with it

~ your voice - tom says something so stupid and has to deal with the consquences

~ supercluster - its toms birthday but he has a few things to get off his chest and into the night sky, y/n joins in with a bit of a revelation too

~ stay stay stay - sometimes tom can be the one in need too

~ sleepy sunsets - picking up tom from the airport blurb

~ living and reviving - when toms caught out all hope looks lost

~ baby bump chats - the story of your pregnancy through toms eyes

~ brotherly advice - tom wants to ask harry if he’s taking things to quick with y/n , which harry takes pure glee in

~ pretty boy face - what starts off as tom taking you under his wing and some sunrise workouts together might just develop into something more

~ zooming - online uni is hard when your boyfriend is intent in being a little shit

~ neutralise the escapee. - little bit of fluff while in quarantine cos you know ... the worlds gone mad

~ honeymoon morning. the morning after the night before, full of fluff and surprise and Tom being a lil jealous of Haz

~nothing’s changed at all - 2 years later and Paddy being a bit of a matchmaker

~ admit you miss me - FaceTime, pining and a pandemic- but still cute and lovey

~ moving on - change is scary and it makes you question the realistic future you and tom have

~ a father and daughter - me trying to write dad!tom and resulting in this

~ stop caring - angst reader has a panic attack and the only person to help isssss

~ a job offer - kinda a part two to stop caring, trying to patch up your relationship a small step at a time

~ or him - soon to be dad!tom predicts your babies gender

~ ...surprise part 1 part 2 part 3 this is angsty too, Tom comes home to found out you’ve been through hell and back while he was away, and he didn’t even know

~ a friendly face - bit if angst but mainly just fluff, read pays Tom a surprise visit when she finds out he’s struggling with the emotional stress cherry brings, while the Russo’ make Tom think long and hard... not just about stage direction

~ ruining the plan isn’t always so bad. Fluff!! completely based off the podcast Dom did after him and Sam surprised Tom filming years ago, but with the added component of y/n

~ two beautiful girls - just tom coming home to you and his 18 month daughter and to cuteness that would ensue

~ unusable faces - famous!reader and tom are worked to complete exhaustion so they sneak off together to find some rest bite

~ in your own way - people are just talented at different things and sometime y/n has to remind Tom that

~ the worst case scenario [part 1] [part 2] [part 3] [part 4] [part 5] - very very angsty , bcos childbirth isn’t always perfect in the slightest COMPLETED

~ birth photographer 2 - harry gets terrified by toms request about the birth of his child, but the reader smoothes it over

~ too early - fluffy blurb!!!! based off Tom’s early morning insta stories that had me melting ahah

~ wasn't expecting that - you run into possibly the most infuriating family members the one time u and ur boy are showing PDA

~ you cant hide - fluff, reader tries to hide being ill from Tom and it doesnt work

~ homework hell - tom struggles to help his daughter with maths homework and chaos descends

~ anti valentine - its hard for Tom to be romantic, when your the most cynical person going 

~ don't make it weird - life is sometimes not good, but your fave boy makes it just a little easier to deal with (with some original help from his brother too)

~ how he loves - the little things he does in boring day to day life

~ perfect no matter what - tom helps you to see your worth

~ bad advice - fluffy blurb, tom seeking Harry's advice on his relationship

HARRY

~ what do I do - first time the reader falls asleep on harry and he’s all scared and nervous and tom is like ugh

~ your song - harry never sings in front of you, until you need it

~ need your person part 1. part 2 - this is very angsty! but Harry really gets the wrong end of the stick of a situation and blows up much to the detriment of the person he loves

~ this bloody door - bad days and bad doors , but something does make it better

~ in the middle - oops only one bed left i wonder if the mutual pining gets outed?

[24-guy]

I spent 2 hours on writing notes from the prison podcast stream.

Now I don’t know what to do with them, so I’m putting them here. 

No need to read them, there is just some interesting stuff I noticed, things like tones and how many times somethings are brought up. 

if you do, though, I apologize  for spelling errors. 

start stream

techno "did the calculations" on how long it would take to mine obsidian with the amount of mining fatigue they had. we knoe this is true.

dream has been writing, it is the only thing hes been able to do with the limited items he has. its his "diary"

techno teases over fanfics on wattpad

"the only thing ive written is my diary" do the revive books not count, then? or what is in the revive books that isnt writing?

techno focuses on that nobody is watching - dream doesnt comment on it - dream doesnt know about the voices?

techno is supposed to break dream out, but he hasnt got many ideas "ill get to it later"

techno enjoys prison - sees it as a vacation

techno has an optimistic outlook.

go with the flow

dream sees harming himself as exhillerating techno disaprooves

dream tells techno quackity has been torturing him everyday. techno is only surprised by the every day part

dream mentions the revive book techno remembers being told about that asks "yeah you can bring people back from the dead. yeah so how do you do that" - curious tone, seems genuinely interested for innocent meanings dream responds " i have.. the knowledge and then i get a book and then i burn it" - hesitant at first, then vague but seemingly honest reponse

techno asks what the knowledge is, incantation/password/expelliarmus dream says "something like that" slowly, then quickly says he doesnt know and that he "doesnt know how schlatt had it" - going away from the topic original book - there are more than one it is a book is what youre saying - t well... i mean, it was a book that i memorised and that now i can recreate - d techno tries again to get the knowledge he wants to revive people dream doesnt want to tell techno because he wouldnt be the only one who knew techno tries to bargain saying that if dream died, techno coulld bring him bacl dream knows they wont kill him because he can revive people

dream says no, techno says "you forgot how to write it down didnt you dream says he didnt, that he did it recently, techno repeats again that dream forgot brings up wattpad again. dream says he wrote it down for tommy. he doesnt mention wilbur to techno. bring up the homeless situaation prison is dreams house cell is boiling apparently makes a joke about cali rent prices

nobody visited the cell "we stopped anarcy" "when we get out of here" no though ahead going into this situation (techno) "just as far as i need to" dream doesnt know what techno means by stream schedule, techno jokes about dream's lack of schedual techno usually trains always looking for new combat, reasearching constant arms race no idea when a government will arise or opressing people is always prepared has a good amount of gear he also plays golf somewhere offers a game with dream no way to describe it somewhere farther than his house

dream asks about tommy techno hasnt seen him canonically, only knows he stole acouple months ago - as far as he tells dream

dream asks about carl carl is doing well

dream asks about the family its doing good, apparently, new foxes, got steve who will break him out dream writes about steve "i will write evrrything down because its hard to remember" another fanfic joke

dream asks whos feeding them they feed themselves its probably fine

milld break for 4 wall break

gist or jist

prison podcast offers, agrees that is all this is

technical difficulties

podcast bros

eating potato

dream offers his thoughts on what would happen of he tried to revive somebody who is alive two technoblades human meat sheild

dream wants to try no death first what could go wrong nothing else to do

techno house is man vs nature conflict floor has ants floof brings ants spilled pet food dream has a revivebook techno tries to read it first hit with book a small wait throw into lava DreamXD joins broke the table fixed table a god dream "cloned himsef" god looks exactly like dream feels like a question to ask earlier dream summoned dreamxd ask for wish ask for bell dream gets mad because no escape dreamxd leaves sellout timer goes off techno makes money as dream questions his life dream sits in corner hole techno aims to be annoying we count channel members for a bit

dream and techno friend bonding time?

summons dreamxd for reviving nobody dream writes this in his diary as techno rings bell tries again, it doesnt work creative mode is a known thing by mortals they know how deadly it is

warden on vacation

techno hasnt written anything he has at least 4 books in his inventory, going from the top 2nd space to the top 5th space. the fourth book is called information and is signed by dream. dream throws a potato in the lava techno asks for the revive book again, this time to see of dreamxd will come back because it is a different person summoning him dream says no

techno needs a bell to sell out for the *brand*, ritual and tradition dream put the bell in church prime no twitch primes for dream - hes a heratic (no contract) dream makes no profit dream has lots of raw potatos for 5-6 months

techno asks if dream has any friends dream says not really, they turned against him techno knows the feeling being betrayed by closest friend happens every tuesday for techno

dream mentions being visited by a few people techno asks if any tried not to torture or kill him dream says yeah like he wasnt expecting the question/(as techno put it) "he hesitated"

sapnap - didnt torture or kill him - but he said if dream got out of there, then he would - techno says hes gotta raise his standards

bad - was the best - treated dream the best - techno says hes a cult leader - dream is surprised so techno tells him about the egg - techno wasnt clear - bad hasnt viseted since 4-5 months ago - techno says even he has friends - egg was attacked - big crossover episode not clear what is going on

techno - last time they saw each other was dooms day - been a while - lot has happened - techno doesnt now whats going on currently on the server - he knows nothing - "people" tell him who died and who came back

tubbo - asks about tubbo - tubbo is chillng - snowchester named - commune - a little sus - dictator - no rushing to conclusions - tubbo has nukes - big crater - a hoby - could be meteor

ranboo - asks about ranboo - ranboo is also chilling - brings up tubo's nukes now

dream points out that techno said he didnt know anyting and then said about a new place, nukes, and a lot more dream doesnt know anything - less than techno

ranboo (again) - dream says he used to visit a while ago and then stopped coming - techno asks "ranboo used to visit?" - ranboo visited "a bit" - probably visited the most - sapnap visited - tommy visited a couple of times - bad visited - and quackity - quackity visited the most, only because hes visited daily

more potatos pog potatos

ranboo (x3) - techno asks how dream knows ranboo - "um... its just a.. long story" - techno replies sarcastically about how they dont have any time to go through it, theyre so busy with the bell - dream "i dont know him very well. he just visited a few times and that was it." - techno just repeats alright, its either bored or thinking - dream "and then i havent seen him since then so thats why i was wondering where hes been, if hes been around" - techno " ah... im not sure. i havent been around fpr like the past couple of months, honestly."

techno went on  atraining montage, played golf

dream asks about the plan to get out mining fatigue 3 doesnt mean they cant break blocks, its just approximately 370 times longer breaking obsidian takes a bit over 4 minutes math = obsidian block gone in 25.7 hours. an alarm break in the right spot break block in toilet elder guardian below the cell techno can take him if techno somehow dies dream brings him back could be out in 2 weeks havent been visited for 2 weeks nothing to lose dream has to break obsidian techno wants to end stream techno came up with idea so dream has to do it dream starts bell ringing for cheerng him on techno sounds happy that dream is doing it voices are mentioned - theyre laughing techno has perfect track of time techno is gonna annoy dream the entire time techno is a lookout there are only 4 books we only see the 4th name floof interrupts momentarily tommy killed a cat because dream liked it 300 dogs in the cell joke

channel member bell dream regrets his life again techo's plan? bell was a better investment dream has 10 bells in e chest techno doesnt techno wanted to go for more so techno could ring bell again

end of stream

[softsweetsuffering]

OC LIST (New)

Trey:

Has an ability to mimic or amplify abilities/powers of others, as well as telekinesis

Was previously part of a group of people who also had abilities, however after mistreatment and other issues within the group, he left.

He's got a good wealth behind him.

Extremely gentle

Handsome ;)

Loves photography

Has lavender hair

Respects all

'Secretly' Plays violin

Lowkey a sugardaddy

Hamrish Benat:

Has four eyes!

Pink and blonde hair

He loves parkour (as in climbing buildings and leaping around in gyms)

Has PTSD (There are two AUS of which I default as to how he obtained it)

Ready to deck a bitch

Trained nurse

Loves teddy bears and fuzzy pink socks.

Also goes by Hami/Hayden

Andy peters:

Strong, kind.

The quiet Big Type, doesn't always talk, but his heart is in good places.

Wishes he could do more

Buff + Tall

Wears a pair of dogtags.

Has red streaks in his hair for the fun of it

Is extremely brotherly to Adrian

is friends with Hami

Adrian Géarán:

Nervous Malnutritioned anxiety filled tired mess

Has emotionally linked fire abilities (does not like having them)

likes to make little robots!

Easily bullied

Missing an arm

Struggles with normal life

Blames himself for Andys death

Looks unintentionally vaguely like Fry from Futurama

Chris:

Leader of a summer camp for kiddos

Huge fan of the outdoors

Loves to garden

Red head with freckles

Healthy!

Good build, a little on the below-average male height

Likes to hike

Loves kids

Strong but pacifistic

Great smile

Surprisingly a little shy around other adults

Bisexual

Himbo energy

Douglas Connelly:

Just a regular chubby guy

His chub is only important because this man gives some of the best hugs, he's like a marshmallow

He is outwardly confident about his size, even if it sometimes worries him internally

He loves music, loves to groove in the kitchen while making snacks

Always open for roommates and new friends (one of his roommates is a hot bartender called Donovan)

A bit awkward but he tries his best.

Tucker:

Badass

Bunny hybrid (ears :3)

White hair

Likes to wear denim jackets

Fast runner

Has had experience working in the force

Izekiel Iris:

Bruised and abused in a facility

Was turned from human into A being of made of Paint (Useful? no. Fun? yes. Rainbow blood anyone?)

Loves painting

Wallflower

Easily anxious

Loves to draw on his own arms

Matthew Libelle:

Aka Matty Very delayed development wise as well as Autistic

Very much a texture lad, soft blankets are his thing.

Doesn't like loud sounds ( who does honestly).

Tries his hardest to function normally but it's hard.

Watermelon colours are his fav. Green hoodie is his fav.

Has watermelon pink hair.

Gale:

Eldritch bab

Was cursed by a group of guys who were messing with magics they didn't understand

Did in fact murder said group of guys and is traumatised by the idea he has become a monster

hears voices

Has Tendrils that have burst out of his back

Has the ability to move from this realm to the Eldritch planes and back. (is terrified of said planes)

Doesn't have a home

Black curly hair- frizzy- shimmers like Slick oil

Shy type kinda, tall Pale. cold.

Kinda wishes he could just go back to normal.

Would really like to eat some fresh warm bread.

Rowan maverick

Was abandoned as a teen

Also known as Rogue/Red.

Lost some of their tongues making them mute

Trained Assassin.

Previously part of a cult

Addict to painkillers (Caused by the mental issues from the cult and the loss of tongue.)

Bad with Physical affection

Could use a friend

Jace

Cop/Ex Cop.

Laid off after an incident

Has a pubby called Otis

Likes the occasional beer

Dad energy

Issac Merewen

Was previously a Teacher - grade 11/12s

Kidnapped and kept Drugged the hell up.

Was given the new name: Jess/Jack. AKA The Jester

Now has Amnesia problems .(Anomic aphasia)

Was stored Cramped in box.

Needs glasses. (Long sighted. Cant see Infront of him for shit without glasses. He specifically likes round ones :3)

Natrually Blonde

He was very inspired by the Chitty Chitty bang bang scene, “Doll on a music box”.

- He naturally has two different coloured eyes :D

-He likes podcast n occasionally audiobooks. Its good for learning/remembering words, and way easier than straining his eyes. Although it is upsetting occasionally when he can remember more of a book/podcast he’s into more than real words or real-life things.

Tyrone Li

Incubus.

Wise, Patient, caring.

Brown tattoos wind up his hips and torso, curling around his chest around his heart, and around his back, flaring at his neck.

Glasses.

Loves plants and flora

Sex lost meaning when he was younger. He wants true intimacy again but he wants to find the right person..

Glamors hide the following features:

Tail, brown that gradients into Green, Leaf like tip.

Horns, curled. (green tipped :0)

Glamors break usually after a certain period of time regardless of feeding, however, during bad situations/fight the body may unglamour to reserve the last of its energy.

Caspian:

Basically immortal but can die (Reincarnations)

Not a pacifist, but not instantly into violence

He was blessed by the Heart of the Ocean (Shes wonderful <3)

Can control water, can do minor healing with water

Can make water bubble/ boil when angry

Glowy veins when powers are active

He has had many many lives

Soft..caring..Doesnt remember alot of his past..

Doesn't know how many times hes died

Doesn't have alot of family or friends

Goes on many adventures

Elio Solren.

Nickname: Sunshine

Good lad.

Is a shapeshifter Dealt with being told he was happy and always upbeat. People leaving or ignoring him whenever he wasn't started building this sense of need to be happy all the time for others.

Lots of struggles with self image. Being perfect. Appeasing everyone. Poor self body love/self body image.

Is scared about The hate from humans about shifters. The jealousy and fear about them being able to hide behind other faces.

Smiles to hide the pain

Punk/hipster vibes

Intricate golden tattoos

Doesn't open up easily

Doesn't like to admit to being in pain

Kotori

AKA Corey

Owl lad!

Bright yellow piercing eyes. But is totally blind. (Face scars)

Loves music.

Plays the uke.. hums..sings sometimes.

Big wings- like barn owl.

Likes to perch in trees

Jeremey Caulfield

Winter baby

Was left bleeding in the snow at some point

Father Lovely old man (John)

Mother died (Ellie)

Birthday December 23h

Blue eyes

Black hair

Russel

Box boy

Glasses

Red hair

Real sweetheart

Really needs more dev ; ;

Jules

Loves tofu n chicken

Touchstarved

Stubborn af

Kicks ass!

Has Sass

Wears binders/sports bras for Lotsa running n such

Black hair big messy pigtails

Dark brown eyes.

Has a navy bear sleeps with it ‘doesn't care’ about it but does

Gymnast/kickboxing. Bandages around hands

Loved swinging bars since being a kiddo

Trampolines!!

Participates in Underground fight ring to make easy money

Sleeps on just a mattress

Has a laptop for study work but she's slowly giving up on bothering.

(She's not one originally but Werewolf Jules is one of my fav things)

Miles

Part mole, part orphan

Lives underground

Very light-sensitive

Is colourblind

Absolute nerd

loves tinkering with things

is scared of humans

very foggy memories of his parents.

Leilah/ Lei

Can make/control shadows.

Owns a Magic skull(Speaks to it)

Lives in the woods

Wears a skull to spook off people from her woods

Has Tattoos that are shadow/absorb shadows

Kinda bad at maintaining friendships

Emotionally Distant

Wears a cloak.

Bao Ketsuyki

Blood magic bab

Short

East Asian.

Pink/red medium length hair

Big pretty red flower scar from blood magic use on her shoulder/ back.

Little bit foolish, little bit reckless.

Has almost died a few times from her magic use.

Oran Audun

Pale

Punk

Irish

Plays Guitar

Writes in journal, occasionally song lyrics, occasionally little messy ink drawings.

Easy to aggravate (On edge) however is trying to learn how to meditate and be calmer

Covered head to toe in scars but still tries to find confidence in himself. He doesn't find it unattractive, but he feels like others have no need to witness his scars.

loves wearing leather/fabric wrist bracelets

Unwelcome hands have used his body as a research object

Very very against physical contact, needs to break into it.

Ray

Social worker works mainly with kids.

Has a Shy guy tattoo.

His family consists of a Good ma, younger sister, and super baby brother

Dad died but dad was good.

Dirty blonde hair, kinda messy

Short, 5’

Socks the pupper is his helpful lil buddy (hes so round and white and fluffy)

Super dad vibes.

Owen

a hockey player n gymnast.

His mother died when he was about 9.

has an older brother who is a bit of a big jock type

quite protective and caring of his two much younger siblings.

ended up in a nasty scuffle though at some point during his more competitive years in Hockey

This leads to following his passion for Gym

Pole vault, the rings, trampoline.

Still plays hockey among mates or strangers on the weekends in the cold months tho

Ends up taking a position as a gym teacher for kids after taking a childhood course since he was so good at it.

actually a really sweet guy

Soft but likes his sport and jokes.

He can hold his own somewhat more than he appears.

has blue tips/stripes in his blonde hair.

He often wears varsity jackets or baseball tees. As well as a couple other sport wear shirts. (A. Good few are from his bro ofc. Free merch)

He's short but he's got a fairly decent build on him.

He's got a surprisingly good tackle if you aren't careful. And a good grip strength.

Nohea

but everyone calls him Noah.

Works at a Boba tea cafe..

likes to surf.

has an Epic board.

Back and shoulders all littered with lines and tic tac toe-like scars.

he's the type to brush off any questions and change topic while smiling. But not super bubbly. Just. Go lucky.

has a few friends who like to hang out at the cafe

Was in a surfing accident that involved a lot of rocks.

Ila

4’8 Soft. Short.

Ready to protect.

Loves to bake!!!

Smells like a vanilla cupcake most of the time

Isn't afraid to fight although isn't trained

likes Yoga ( and yoga pants)

Needs glasses but doesn't wear them (tsk tsk, unless tryign to read recipes)

Dyes hair silver/white

Jake

Homeless

Snake hybrid can transform his lower half from human legs to tail

Also has fangs, and therefore venom

He's got a lot of sass

Can be a bit of an asshole but soft around the right people

Isn't used to kindness

doesn't cry easily

Steals food

Mac Hiato

Also known as Caf

5’6

Very Grumpy.

Very often has bags under his eyes.

Hoodie is life

Insomnia has serious trouble sleeping.

Has nightmares of strangulation

Occasionally sufferers sleep paralysis

Scared of dark- night lights

Owns a mouse called Bean

Does freelancing webdesgisn/coding as job.

Sits like a gay.

Lives on coffee

Minorly Lactose intolerant

Has One bad eye

Neema

Egyptian

Mechanic

Her dad's a mechanic and used to bring her to work all the time

dead mum: which affected her ability to emote.

Works part time at the garage

Dad likes to bring gifts on their small catch-ups that happen every once in a while.

Sheeee. Suffers a bit of resting bitch face.

she's kinda stunted emotionally because she was raised by her dad, who, isn't great with emotions himself being a man's man and all.

She's very much a tomboy gal. Doesn't exactly get dressed up. because she finds it tiresome and not "her".

Also if she did/does have friends the nickname Nemo 100% crops up because it's sadly alll too fitting but also kinda sweet.

She's actually really into cars and mechanics. Which is one of the few good reasons her dad and her are close.

She's hard to get to know, very quiet. And if you're someone who dominates the conversation she won't speak up much, but you'll be surprised to how much she's listened.

Just because she looks tired and done doesn't actually mean she feels that way.

Samson (Lemonade boi)

His name is Samson, but he prefers Sun/Sunny. (Other more affectionate nicknames include Lemondrop and Sunflower.)

He really likes going out to markets and stuff like that, little stalls or knick knack shops to find the odd kinda items.

He also really likes wandering big forests. (Hes got some o that fae energy) He collects various cool stones/rocks/plants from some of them. He also has some small vials from waterfalls and ponds he’s encountered)

He wants to practice magic to become a witch! He loves the candles and rocks and other cool things that come with the craft. (He inherited things from his father)

He really likes loose fitting shirts too, like flowy things, ones with sleeves that drape past your fingers, or has extra fabric on the bottom that dangle down past hips. (Sometimes they come from the ladies section just because they’re softer and have more variety. Others from op shops and other niche little stores.)

He bought a cologne from a witch that looks cursed but the only curse is that it makes the one who puts it on smell like citrus..so not much of curse. (The bottle looks fuckin neato tho)

He looves fizzy drinks. Doesn’t mind his alcohol either, however it takes a surprising amount to get him on his ass despite looking like a serious lightweight.

He’s pretty average in build, bit of muscle in his arms, some fat on his thighs. Slight pouch of a tum (cause no ones flat and thats unrealistic :<)

He’s about 5′4. So not tall, but not the shortest of the short.

He kinda likes to backpack about. Not staying in places long if they get boring. Which means he is kinda jack of all trades when it comes to work, offering to fix things for pay, lots of casual work doing various things.(One of his favorites was helping a little old lady run a paint shop.)

He occasionally snorts when he laughs and tries not to.

He has his ears pierced, and he has a little yellow gemed stud in his nose.

The ring around his neck he found in the middle of a patch of mushrooms.

He has a couple other tattoos. One of them is of bubbles up his wrist :3 He also has some stars on his ankle, and a sunflower on one of his fingers on his left hand.

He’s not super in to gardening but he does have his lemon tree. He also wants to grow some mandarins

His eyes look silver in a lot of lights, but occasionally there’s some strange hints of yellow, and other times blue.

He has freckles!!!! that look alot like bubbles ;)

He has a twin brother called Fraser.

Scrunches his nose

Hides his laughter behind his hand

[the-kipsabian]

Hello I want those Arin hcs pls and ty

i knew you were gonna come yelling at me as soon as i mentioned this lol so ask and you shall receive!

➭ i previously headcanoned arin as a fourth year, but tbh i feel like he would be way more of a third year tho? as there is an age gap between him and dan (i think its like. eight years? at least?? im so lost on my grumps lore its amazing lol). so dan would be a fourth year, arin is a third year, and that would lower suzy to a second year student tho. if you wanna include more grumps im sure there would be places for them too but for now lets just keep these three before i lose my mind over all these new inserted characters lmao

➭ somewhere down the line he def becomes bffs with shawna and you can fucking fight me on that, you know it happens (casually tagging @ss-trashboat yo)

➭ arin is def one of those kind of guys where you cant really. decide on your first impression on him tbh? cause he can change in a drop of a hat - at first he might come across as kind awkward and shy cause he doesnt really know how to talk to new people, but if you catch him in the middle of a rant or an upsetting game hes gonna swear the living hell out of everything and be loud and come across really intimidating. or it can be anything in between tbh. hes one of those people where first impressions dont really matter, you gotta get to know the guy to really figure out what arin is all about

➭ ..and honestly when you do, what do you find? a really nice and sweet and supportive guy who just gets really passionate about things (especially games) that he hates

➭ arin is also like. super protective over his friends tho? obviously over suzy as they are dating (and even if they wouldnt be in whatever timeline it is that he gets shipped with someone else, im always open for that option but im just mentioning this here for the sake of clarity as this is. a very obvious ship tbh lol), but also literally everyone else he befriends and then especially dan? like they have been friends for a long time, so arin has probably seen a few heartbreaks and bad breakups here and there, and he just. wants to make sure that his number one guy to be happy, you know?➭ which makes arin like. befriend everyone that dan ever shows interest towards tbh. he wants to make sure this person would be good enough for his best friend, so he does all the ground work - get to know them, slowly maybe introduce dan to them or them to dan, and make sure this whole thing might work out well enough that he doesnt need to step in to stop anything. its not that he doesnt trust the person dan wants to date or that he doesnt trust dan, or that he doesnt think that even if it ends badly that dan isnt going to get over it, its just. arin cares, okay? maybe a bit too much at times, but hes trying his best

➭ arin. is an apron. on every first date his friends are ever going to be on. he doesnt take no for an answer tbh, he just. wants to make sure everything goes alright. hes not gonna be in the way, hes not gonna third wheel it, none of that, arin is just. going to hang out in the background to make sure everything turns out fine. and most of the time dan is the only one aware of it and his date is not, so it doesnt even really get that awkward tbh

➭ in short, arin is like the super overprotective mom over all his friends but in a really nice way tho tbh

➭ if you befriend arin, you get invited to a lot of game nights. very often its party games and include other mutual friends or at least the rest of the grumps crew

➭ also if you befriend arin and make the mistake of sharing your phone number with him, he will blow your phone up with ridiculous memes and stuff in the middle of the night. with some ‘oh hey i saw this picture/video/thing/whatever and thought of you!’ mixed in between. again mostly in the middle of the night

➭ hes. super hardworking tbh. arin might not be the best at school, but holy shit does he put in a lot of effort for his studies tho. hes already busy with a whole lot of things (as they do the whole grumps club thing [i wanna say its kind of a mixture of what normal boots does and the podcast stuff we established with super beard bros?], he participates in some theater club activities with dan [esp the improv nights!] and just in general he just. does a whole lot of different activities around school cause he just likes helping out and lending a hand when someone asks if they are friends) so the rest of his time is spent studying tbh, when hes not. too enraged by video games lol. so he doesnt really get a whole lot of rest most of the time, but hes trying. arin is really really trying cause he wants to do all these things and be good at school too and then some. he just. has a whole lot of dedication for everything he does tbh

➭ also yeah this boio is an artist, obviously. hes not as dedicated to his craft as like say kit and/or ayu are, but he likes to draw and is often seen doodling around in class or during breaks and whatnot. its usually simple cartoons about his fave games or shows or something like that

[little-owly]

What about when Google's water breaks and he goes into labor? Is everybody panicking while trying to help as much as they can?

ABSOLUTELYit's a few days before google's due, the egos throwing a party for him. just one last hooray before the triplets get here, cake, treats, even google's weird pregnancy craving snacks at the table. decorations all around in blues and whites. and happy small talk and soft gossiping over who the dad could be.ed's strumming on his guitar, providing music for now as dr. ip//lier looks for his radio. his soft country voice singing out an impromptu cover of 'hey jude'"hey!! maybe you should name one jude, after you name one bing jr." bing laughs as he downs his punch, nudging at google."very funny," he hisses, rubbing his tummy."whats up?" bing asks, noticing, "ollie kicking too hard?""y-yeah," he hisses, "r-really hard. he's like a little athlete in there..."dark turns to the two, eyebrow raised. bing wasn't truly this dense, was he? sigh, leave it to him to fix google and his pains."google, need any assistance?" he's silent. his system whirling by as he grips the table. ed's soft voice singing with his strumming. wilford laughing with bim and host. yan and the jims whispering quietly. silver thumbing through his phone. the coldness of the room. he was hyperaware of his surroundings. too hyperaware. nearly glitching out as bing catches him in time."woah!! googs, hey?! bud?!""he's --" dark's cut off.a low growl of pain turns into a shout. clear liquid falling to the floor, darkening his grey sweatpants, shaking in bing's arms at the notification pops up.'HEALTH UPDATE - PREGNANCYEXECUTING LABOR CODE5% COMPLETE DELIVERY NEAR - SEEK MEDICAL ATTENTION IMMEDIATELY'"oh, oH OKAY THIS IS HAPPENING, BROS." bing calls out, picking up the pained google with ease, bridal style. "WHAT DO I DO?! IS IT LIKE, NOW NOW?!""BING YOU IDIOT," dark calls out, "TAKE HIM TO EDWARDS OFFICE."the crowd runs into a mess, yan rushing behind bing to help carry or even protect google from anything. edward dropping his guitar to steal the cake in the chaotic panic. silver and the jims rushing the opposite way to grab google's overnight bag from his apartment. the host calming sipping his punch, headphones over his ears as he listens to whatever podcast of the week he was enjoying. king calling his subjects from the open window for back up helpwilford and dark standing among the mess"ready for three more ego kids?" wilford chuckles."king and yan were hell alone, but three at the same time? not at all" dark smiles, "doesnt mean i dont want it to happen.""lets go help, yea?" wilford kisses him. the egos still in a blind panic as google shouts for the doctor to forget his radio and help him with the dilating pain

[shytiff]

June Small Wins

1 - ecmocard meeting with ppl from aussie to learn to sort out data. Felt better after the meeting cause i didnt feel like doing anything before. Got two season deli box cake from dapur cokelat for nessa. Videocalled w her and ren.

2 - dr eva chatted and gave things to do. I also need to make intern log for dr retha. I just cant bring myself to start. Finally mustered the courage. Im not the type of person for wfh. At least in this house. Finished reading love or hate. I rly felt like shit at night.

3 - started reading positively yours. Had no will to do anything

4 - some more sending spss work for dr eva. weekdays with no “outside work” rly render me useless in functioning. a vegetable

5 - iluni webinar. Lost my attention during electrolyte and fluid stuff. tried to cook ribeye steak lmao (meat from @/fridaymeatshop). Its too chewy and leathery. But its not too welldone. And at least it tastes good. Went to depok by krl. its quite quick since krl arrived just after im at poris and duri. went ahead of silvi devi. satpam on the lobby wont open the access hhhh (i dont have one. i dunno why. mom said she cant find it although we supposedly have 2). but my mood improved once im upstairs. we prepped a bit of deco. conversed in the dark so not to make racheel suspicious. surprisee. had truffle belly chicken cheese for dinner. the cheese was not to cheesy, its more of a gentle taste. mushroom tastes better. we watched sweet and sour from my mobile data. surprisingly, its not that much of data. slept at like 12-1ish

6 - the electric token went out in the morning. we went for a walk in ui. the PLK man across of st ui forbade us from going in. ugh. but it was rly empty. so we went from barel. its empty on the library. there was a dog that walked along with us. talked a bit in front of the lake. went back. i got 2 moon chicken (the basic flavor and not the wings) and spicy jumeokbap. the jumeokbap was nothing like what i had in korea. like the seaweed’s taste doesnt come out that much, and its not that flavorful/savory. the one in korea its good even by itself. went back to jkt nebeng reza silvi with devi. originally planned to go to flavola, but my head kinda hurts, so i finished my moon chicken at the mushola and asked juan to pick me up. still feel healthy and normal after going and staying out, so i started reading a book abt handwriting analysis lmaoo. fell asleep. tried several attempts to figure out my bpjs number and turns out the best there is to respond is BPJS’ twitter. the problem was solved under 5 mins. 

7 - woke up, fell asleep again. Adita told me that i might be interviewed today for the ipd intern but theres no info. Did the registration stuff for my bpjs. Registered for npwp. Watched bts x na pd

8 - off to RSF. its audit day today. hiks to phonecall follow up work. i did not do anything inaco related, i just sat there and did dr dafsah’s excel. dr vera bought me pecel ayam hehe yay. went to como park to meet up with indah regen. tried ricotta pizza from pizza place (33k). the cheese is cheese but not that typical cheesy (?) coupled with mushroom. i had to add sauce to withstand the last bites (still kinda full). tried other’s as well, pesto and mushroom. pesto had the most taste. while waiting for doggo to arrive, we bought gelato (S: 35k). apparently their special flavor was ricotta lmao. tried green tea (bitter, which i like) and peanut butter + caramel, which makes you feel thirsty. watched the doggos from the sidelines. after maghrib we went to 1/15. ordered ice mocha (50k). the chocolate taste stood out more. not gonna order again lol. the staff initially recommended pandan flavor. took grab to gbk station to go home.

9 - rsf. second audit day. i hate it here lmao. im not even paid for my time here. excused myself to eat. turns out mbak Ai bought hokben. i almost forgot thanking her since i felt hungry with a bit of headache. talked a bit with dr retha regarding changes of assistant (since internship is soon). went back and immediately laid down in bed. mom bought pizza so thats what i ate for dinner. fell asleep (i can feel it. my face will get consequences)

10 - cant bring myself to do anything. i reread painter of the night lmao. seungho is a prick. inhun is also a prick (a greedy one). ate arirang bone marrow. put the egg-seasoning mixture to the pan since im not confident enough to just pour boiling water into the bowl. felt surprisingly full. went to sbux. green tea latte as usual. but turns out tumblr 50% promo only applies to sbux member. so i had to pay 40k for my green tea latte. at least i got to feel good from outside vibes. did some follow up for INACO patients. 

11 - went to rm rsf. Took lots of photos of RM. I was given rujak by the rm staff lmaoo so cute. Didnt do any entry afterwards lmao i just laid down

12 - breakfast is paldo jjajangmen and egg. It tasted like soy. Its good but not in a micin way. Its quite fulfilling. Had some of the beef slices by putting it in a buttered pan (is it pan fried? Grilled? Idk). Had banana and brownies together (makes it rly good). Did a bit of clires work. I drank sbux's caramel macchiato but yall my stomach cant handle it lmao. It hurts so much that i even got a headache. So i just laid down in bed

13 - had arirang again loll. Inserted the egg to the pan still, but quicker this time. Its too salty today. Maybe its not enough water. I was eating it while googling how to remove excess sodium. Ate the rest of beef slices (shared with bros ofc) and mixed some with moms fried rice. Ate banana brownies again. Felt soooo full. Did some clires work accompanied by sbux matcha

14 - i felt like shit this morning. Watched leahs vid. Listened to her podcast while having bfast. I walked from moms car to bougenville while still feeling like shit. It slowly gets better afterwards, thankfully. Did some clires and follow up. Went to gandy steak in dr retha's car (which had anesthesiology textbook inside). Tried aus sirloin steak. The bread tasted ok. The garlic bread also ok. The mashed potato was so so (the one in depok was more creamy and smooth). The steak was good, especially the fat part, the sauce so so. Honestly that depok steak had more value for money compared to this, i think. Nebeng dr rara and husband to busway station. Arrived in ar and i immediately showered, such wow 👏👏

15 - today is no rsf day aka self made wfh day. Moms getting vaccinated today. I just lazed. And read kanej fics

16 - off to rsf. Took care of rm stuff. Tried social affair's croffle since i was so curious (60k [10k tip]). The nutella and cinnamon sugar one. Its crunchy and a bit crumbly inside, but not as fragile as croissant. Its quite fulfilling too. But its basically flour batter variations. (thats what mom would say). randomly chatted racheel and we ended up taking a walk and a bit of jog citra 6 (with my sneakon regular shoes). My left tendon was screaming lol. Picked up by juan who surprisingly effortlessly found the address at night.

17 - mbak aan chatted me today to go to rscm. Met prof murdani at pesc and he gave me ppt assigment for 13:30 THAT DAY. Finished it unsatisfyingly (i wish i couldve done more). Lunch was free bebek bkb yay thankyou Prof c: (he even asked what did i ate) took care of legalisir stuff. Went home by tj. Drank matcha w vsoy and i somehow was not sleepy after maghrib. I also changed my desj layout. Maybe it kinda works to separate my spaces

18 - arrived at rscm at 8-ish. sent updated thibbun nabawi ppt. literature search. and then somehow its 14:30. went to SCI w ara wani rasyid. tried bandeng nyonya, oyster, salmon, cumi lada garam (its crazy good among all the good tasting food wtff), shrimp and pocai telor (veggie stuff). dessert was thailand cassava. spent about 190k. went back by TJ. had wudu at pulomas and prayed ashar on the bus lol. i passed out after playing w my phone lmaoo  

19 - spent almost the whole day just sleeping and eating. finally showered in the afternoon. had matcha vsoy latte after maghrib and with enough day sleeping, i did presentation outline. at like 1/2 am i initially planned to sleep but my eyes still have plenty of watts. so i read hold me tight. slept at like 4/5 am

20 - woke up at 9. off to om dokter’s house to ask for healthy letter. we talked almost the entire time im there lol. before u know it mom and dad’s done talking with grandma. om dokter shared some of his experiences in the past. and he said something about making your choice and living with it, and it will all have a meaning even if you might initially agonize about it. girl i was holding back tears. here he was talking about choices, something i never rly talk about at my house. im getting teary just typing this. he talked about it in a way that sounds simple, even though i agonized abt internship choices and sometimes avoid thinking about it. it rly rly was a new experience. i dont rly talk about “choices” with my parents. so hearing how to go through options in life from a person i can relate to regarding this med stuff is. i feel like i would have loved it if i can hear his wisdom earlier. i dont talk with him much if my parents are around bcs they will just meddle and say stuff that wreck my peace. they dont rly know what im going through but can be very opinionated. this peaceful one on one talk rly made me feel relieved and reassured. and i was today years old when i found out he initially wanted to be a psychiatrist. he would have been a great psychiatrist. i feel like we have some understanding thats left unsaid. like he knows how my parents are like. he would probably understand why i dont talk with him much at AR. after what feels super quick, we went back to AR. registered for STR. searched some literature for the topics that Prof is the moderator of. powered by matcha energy

21 - rscm as usual. the Prof did not come. lunch was bread i brought from home. waited for mom to pick me up at kfc so i bought pukis kfc. its like properly made pukis and not the street seller made ones. the chocolate one was good since the toppings generous. felt a bit feverish? like my body felt warm. fell asleep and then suddenly its 6 am in the morning. 

22 - Prof still did not came. had amart’s ayam penyet jamur for lunch. turns out juan bought ayam geprek gendut for dinner. night time is diarrhea time lmaooooo. did not feel sleepy at AR but i skipped shower again lmao,,,,,,,, and then suddenly its morning again

23 - jajan from sisterfield today. tried their carrot cake and kopi susu gula aren. the carrot cake has that carrot texture. its different. the icing was fresh cream cheese that made the cake taste good. the coffee made my stomach ache a bit. it has that subtle chocolatey taste. fell asleep again. third time’s the charm (of 1x/day face wash). woke up at 3 am planning to sleep but i ended up washing my face. turns out atikah was still awake due to AZ fever.

24 - this is the bestest sleep i had in this week (?) had a dream about going to bandung and the car falling to water. forgot my headset today. can finally meet prof Mur. talked abt inaco stuff w agassi. reread komugi meruem lmaoo. felll asleep. somehow had the misfortune of hearing dad’s hurtful words to mom. i want to fall asleep again but its difficuly. i went through stages of pent up anger, some sort of selfishness (i will go out from jakarta for internship), amazement to mom, and... (continue 2moro)

25 - lunch was dori rice from kanprim thanks to rasyid’s jastip. watched bts’ butter norebang lolll :(((. arrived at AR the fastest ive been. mom came to me right before maghrib and  summed some stuff dad said yesterday. she handled it in a trivial way. like she was unaffected. and that somehow helped me too. stuck around in the dining room for a while after maghrib. talked about internship w mom. i left some chance for dad to yap yap abt whatever related to internship (thankfully songs were full volume through my wireless headset) while im inhaling through my matcha latte. i wont write what he said bcs its lowkey super embarrassing. thank the gods for wireless speakers. 

26 - did not do anything productive today. Had arirang salted egg for bfast (wont repurchase). Had the meat cubes i bought online and its rly good. Ran with racil at citra 6. The tendon in my left feet hurt lol. Gmeet with ara et al to discuss internship review

27 - lazed. Wanted to start my day early but couldnt bring myself to. Binge watched twoset videos. Did clires stuff. 1 more RM to wait from IRMIK. No gastro intern work this weekend aaaa im starting to panic.

28 - juan came along otw to rscm. Talked about iship otw. brought tons of stuff to eat, including matcha latte, but i was unable to finish it lol. Discussed research budgeting w Prof. Didnt do anything in home. Starting to panic with my ppt progress.

29 - discussed budgeting revision. Prof thought abt little details i didnt even consider. Didnt do anything while at ar anjengggg

30 - prof did not come to dept today. Listemed to agassi rambling abt intern stuff. Immediately opened my laptop in ar. Watched two set. Played marapets lmaooo i finally managed to gather 3 au for shop pricer. But still didnot wash my face 👁️👄🤦‍♀️ maybe bcs i hate doing what people tells me to do (re: shower due to covid scare). Had a nightmare abt being in a car ride alone w dad and it was rly rly awkward

[theoccasionalhuman]

my brain felt super foggy when I was making mac and cheese for my brother so i messed it up and that made my brain foggier and now everythings foggy ooo also i ate three spoons of nutella for absolutely no reason two minutes ago like it was good but idk why i did it cloudy? foggy? idkkk my head feels weird like i feel real but i dont but ido and like i feel nothing rn like aboslutely nothing like all my emotions went somewhere wow i want to go outside but allergies and i dont wanna take my meds for it even though my eyes are itchy fuck i just remembered i didn’t wash my contacts yet but its 11 and i need to put them in soon oh well i want to watch a gay show but like i dont remember any and i tried atypical and that felt good because it just reminds me of before but its lowkey boring because ther’s not a lot of gay shit and it was cringy at the end but like i need smth fake because online relationnships are all fAke since they choose what they put out to the world because like they want to seem better but i dont know whta thye’re actually going throggh like they could be constantly fighting all the time and that was the one moement they got along oh and i was listening to emma chamberlains podcast while working out this morning and she as talking about it too like ppl coul post with their friends having fun on at rip but thatcouldve been the only good time they had the whoile trip but we dont know that because its so cial media oh yea and i have peanut butter on my hand because i think i also had peanut butter wait no i knwo because i donthave reeses so i just ate peanut butter and nutella but my mo put the pb in the firdge for some reason so it wasnt as melty and tasty as the chocoare so it ruined the effect of it def emotional eating but that okay because food is energy and one day pf “bad” eating isnt gonna do shit like we only live once i didnt even track that shit its pointless oooo blueberry bagels are really good like i hasd one leftover cuz bro didnt wanna finish it fucking dumbass and i ate it and mac and cheese becasuse yea and yea my stomasch feels like weird tht was a lot of randomf ood but that okay because i need food to live and food is good and idc because i liked eating it i think idk my brains still foggy i lost track of it in the middle when i started not liking eating it bt then i ate a bit more since i fog but like i stopped because i kinda stopped being foggy fr a littl ebit so i stopped and went to my room and i want to eat a fruit roll up but i dont like i wanna eat just to eat it but i dont feel like eating it so im saving it for tomorrow because itsa new day and what i ate/did the day before doesnt define the amount i shoul d eat today smart thinking i  want to feel free i feel trapped in my mind head house room idk ppl dont know me but they do like i think people think they dont know me but its not even that im fake its just i dont have a me i am what i am theres nothing that im hiding guess im too cool 8D <-- thats an emoji with the sunglasses beccause im on my laptop becuae i took my phone out of itd case and it get warm when i use it and it rly ruins the t vibe i wna to date someone but i know that im actively not trying to do anything about it and i dont want to do anhy online shit like that honestly kind of pathetic imagine only having a relationshup thats online that doesnt seem real what if there lying u knwo what no if someone is in a happy long distance online relationship its none of my busisness and good for them but i could neber that shit doesnt seem rela i dont feel like i could commit to that whats my love language i dont trust ppl that much when they complement me becuase theysa y they care but that doesnt do much for me and then touchis like i think i font like it from anhone but ppl i like like that so maybe not sure yet would not ask for a hug seems uncomfortable acts of kindness or whatever is eh ebcause idc and idk how to show my appreciation i think mima  robot illt ake the quiz now and ill lepp you updated u know i love the un someword i cant think of rn because fog un likely thats it anyways like repressed church girl with gay basketball athelete BUT THE THING I  oops hte thing that i find cool about that is that they both have their own experiences and traumas from their repsective lives but whe theyre together none of that shit matters like they wren’t made for each otehr per say but they just fit like they can talk about ti and it just feels right with oneanother that type fo shit i s=jsut fin that so awesome i dont think anyones ever gonan be able to fully understand me idont understant me woah this is long i do another post after i do quiz for love languages

f f f f f f  f fo o o o o o o o o  g  g g g g g g g g  g g g g g g  

[kissmethroughthebone]

Today was so fucking HARRRRD BITCHHHHH

I need a fucking break.

Its 11:04pm, I am so exhausted.

And tired.

Nothing but laundry and depression, what a lovely way to spend the day with myself huh?

Anyways.

I met this Sugar Daddy online. Great guy, has too much time on his hands and his main love language is to drown me in gifts.

Hell, I barely even met the guy longer than 20 minutes... he gifted me 100 dollars, and a pair of AirPods. (Thank you, secret website I found! Fuck yeah.)

Who knew the overweight older man with a blank profile would be more generous than even the most eloquently written profiles? Ha!

So he's new to the bowl, and nervous about it....

Problem? Homie won't discuss an allowance outright.

So having him insist on nog hearing my wants for a potential allowance until we're on the second date, since "he doesnt even know if we have chemistry", but then wanting me to "get closer to him" and kiss him and whatnot without discussing how far he wants to go allowance rise...

Isnt really my thing?

Everything was fine with him on our last date, until I leaned in for a kiss, and he juked me, resulting in directly kissing his sweaty neck rolls and stubble with my perfectly glossed up lips.

......

Making me psychologically like your presence by buying my food, movie ticket to a film that you know I'd love to see, and giving me absurdly nice gifts right off the bat? Perfect, and worthy of a kiss on the lips.

Dodging my kiss and awkwardly making me make direct lip-to-neck-roll contact, with your neck grease, and the stubble stinging sharply against my perfectly softened lips?

I.... can't tell who should be more embarrassed. Then he kissed me on my check.... I, don't.... even have words for yall bro.

.....

.....

.....

Ew.

So of course that stinted an otherwise okay evening; I don't even like AirPods so the gift was sorta useless. I might pawn them, if we part ways with eachother. Since when it comes down to "save money to move out" and "flex with earbuds with no cord to exude Rich Bitch Energy".... yeah, id rather have the cash.

Since the goal is to improve my situation, and not to impress others.

Luxury gowns and hair and makeup? All gorgeous. Would enjoy that as a gift.

But if its like "oh look, my dress costs more than a penthouse in New York", then I'd feel absolutely disgusting.

.....since if I come from poverty, and have known what its like to pay for food with coins i found at the bottom of my purses or pinching pennies non-fucking-stop....

What on Earth would I need a 5,000 dollar gown for, when some fast fashion brand will make one that's 40 dollars, for the same price? I'd feel foolish, buying something so expensive when I could be buying a home, or having my fridge filled up and getting homeless people off of the streets with that same amount of cash.

.....Sigh.

I just want simple things.

I want to be able to afford studio equipment, a place of my own that i wouldn't even mind renting with a roommate, food to cook on early mornings before I start my day.

I want to be the type of money owner that can feed the homeless, change lives, and do whatever I so please without feeling like theres consequences to my actions. (Or well, mainly that I can help others, and/or read a bitch for filth, and yet, still be praised for my lifestyle and the way I treat others.)

I want that "boring old yt man" power, where you don't have to do shit your whole life, and still, can get absolutely praised for it.

That Diogenes, "run into a room and mock that asshole philosopher whos making an ass about himself, then go back outside to lounge in the sun and still have a better quality life than most pretentious people" fucking lifestyle.

An artistic, anarchistic black sugar baby.

If I can change my life all with some 6 dollar co-wash conditioner, a 6 dollar dress from Goodwill, the right package of 1 dollar earrings from CVS or The Local Beauty Supply Store, and still convince someone I'm worth a 400 pay per meet....

What can I not do, with so little?

Other goals:

Make more podcast and livestream videos. My dickhead old boss keeps showing up an hour or two later than he promises, and even then makes too much noise or openly has the world's loudest and most impromptu business meeting maybe five feet away.... and won't move out the way, or even so much as close a door so that in my videos, I can actually be heard past them laughing about whatever they discuss.... fucking tool. Some days he just never fucking shows up. Whats the point then, running a recording studio that no one can fucking access?.... I'm gonna just have to learn to pick locks or whatever, since nigga wont give me the key so I can record on my own time, and the place closes in 6 months anyways, with no plans of reopening, so I might as well find ways in or see what I can do...

Record personal videos of myself. In public, to get over my fear of people seeing me in public spaces potentially talking to myself. And hell, I need proof of my work for my portfolio. I can't pick and choose between "i fear no bitch" and "i get scared when strangers look at me in public".... i can handle strangers seeing me with ugly men below my league with a fucking smile, but not me recording videos huh? Changing that asap. :)

No more settling for less than I deserve. A fat man isn't gonna pay me 140 bucks just to kiss him, he's gonna pay a bigger allowance or go fuck himself.

[healthnotion]

Podcast #475: How to Lose Weight, and Keep It Off Forever

If you’re like a lot of men listening to this podcast, you’ve likely made it a goal to lose some weight this year. But if you’re also like a lot of men listening to this podcast, you’ve made that goal before, maybe even succeeded with it, but have had to make it again because you gained all the weight back. My guest today argues that losing weight is actually pretty easy. The real trick is keeping it off.

His name is Layne Norton. He’s a professional bodybuilder, powerlifter, and doctor of nutritional science, and today on the show we discuss all things fat loss. We begin our conversation discussing why losing weight is easier than keeping it off, the mechanisms that kick into gear once we shed body fat that cause us to gain all of it, and even more back, and why yo-yo dieting is so terrible for you.

We then dig into whether there’s one diet that’s the most effective in helping you lose fat, the tactics you need to use to keep the weight off in the long run, and the real reason exercise plays a role in helping you do so, which isn’t what you think.

Show Highlights

Separating “bro” science from actual research 

Why is it so hard to keep weight off after you lose it?

What makes processed foods different from natural foods 

How our obesogenic environment makes getting fat easy 

The wrong way that most people approach dieting

Why the best diet, bar none, is the one you can stick to 

Why yo-yo dieting is so bad for you 

The various fad diets out there, and why what makes them popular is mostly baloney

The most important element of any diet plan  

Exercise’s role in keeping weight off (it doesn’t have anything to do with calorie burn) 

Why some type of diet constraint is probably necessary for most people 

Why you should take some breaks when dieting 

How dieting affects your athletic/fitness pursuits 

Resources/People/Articles Mentioned in Podcast

Diet and Nutrition Advice From the Doctor of Gains

Everything You Need to Know About Diet and Fat Loss

Bodybuilding.com

The Real Science of Nutrition and Supplements

Sniffing your partner’s farts could help ward off disease

The Pros and Cons of Intermittent Fasting

What Is An Obesogenic Environment?

Why Carbs Don’t Make You Fat & The Benefits of a High-Carb/Low-Fat Diet

A Proven System for Building and Breaking Habits

How to Become a Fat-Burning Beast

A Primer on Flexible Dieting

Carnivore diet

Layne on Mark Bell’s podcast

The obese man who didn’t eat food for over a year

How to Gain Weight

Fat Loss Forever (Layne’s book)

Connect With Layne 

BioLayne.com

BioLayneStore.com

Physique Science (Layne’s podcast)

Layne on Instagram & Twitter

Listen to the Podcast! (And don’t forget to leave us a review!)

Listen to the episode on a separate page.

Download this episode.

Subscribe to the podcast in the media player of your choice.

Recorded on ClearCast.io

Podcast Sponsors

Brilliant Earth is the global leader in ethically sourced fine jewelry, and THE destination for creating your own custom engagement ring. From now until Valentine’s Day, you’ll receive a complimentary diamond stud earrings with the purchase an engagement ring. To see terms for this special offer and to shop all of Brilliant Earth’s selections, just go to BrilliantEarth.com/manliness.

Indochino. Every man needs at least one great suit in their closet. Indochino offers custom, made-to-measure suits for department store prices. Use code “manliness” at checkout to get a premium suit for just $359. Plus, shipping is free. 

Art of Manliness Store. From t-shirts, to mugs, to posters, and other unique items, the Art of Manliness store has something for everyone. Use code “aompodcast” for 10% off your first purchase. 

Click here to see a full list of our podcast sponsors.

Read the Transcript

Coming soon!

The post Podcast #475: How to Lose Weight, and Keep It Off Forever appeared first on The Art of Manliness.

Podcast #475: How to Lose Weight, and Keep It Off Forever published first on https://mensproblem.tumblr.com

[adambstingus]

Barbie Looks Like The Rest Of Us Now. Why Doesn’t Ken?

Humankind has made it to 2016, and it feels great to be here. Barbie’s birthday is on March 9, and Ken’s is two days later. He’s 55 and alive at a time when there are more ways to categorize men than ever before.

You might meet a guy at the bar and immediately recognize from the way that he talks about your drink that he is a mansplainer. Or that the gentleman using three subway seats for his midday nap is a manspreader. A lot of modern qualifiers for guys these days are portmanteaus with “man” in them so that you know who you’re talking about.

It’s easy, isn’t it?

Wherever you go, you can run into sensitive men, rugged men, nice guys who open doors for people, white guys who don’t understand their privilege, handymen, craft brewers, transexual men, men who love My Little Pony, podcasters, DJs, heck: even bros.

And there are words to describe them all.

Unfortunately for girls aged 3 and up, we still have one basic Ken doll:

Boy Band Guy.

Courtesy Mattel

Technically, the dolls above are from the Barbies Fashionistas collection, the same 2016 line that introduced “tall, curvy and petite” female Barbies with a range of body types, skin tones and hairstyles. In the career line, Barbie is a doctor, zoologist and film director. But no matter which way you spin it, each of the Kens from that lineup represent only one type of man: the guy who regularly gets his eyebrows threaded.

These Kens don’t accurately reflect the subtle nuances of masculinity in the modern era, which have been underrepresented in the Barbie universe for too long. Girls aged 3 and up need a Ken who represents the true 2016 man. 

Here are some modern/more accurate Kens we’d like to see:

Man Bun Ken

Craft Beer Belly Ken

Internet Troll Ken

Dad Ken With Elastic Jeans, Sandals And Socks, And Belt Clip For His Smartphone

Lumbersexual Ken

Trump-Voter Ken

Introverted Tech Support Ken

Athleisure Ken With Yoga Mat

Ken At His TEDx Talk

Burning Man Ken

Of course, he’s evolved over the years — Ken Carson was born on March 11, 1961 (two years after Barbie) wearing nothing but red swim trunks, cork sandals, a towel and molded plastic hair. Since then he’s worn tuxedos, crop tops and an electric blue belted jumpsuit. He’s gone from blonde to brunette and back, and has rooted hair now, but his clothes and coiffure aren’t the only thing that’s evolved.

In 1982, Mattel launched Sunsational Malibu Ken, the first African American Ken doll, complete with an Afro.

It was a step in the right direction, but it’s only scratching the surface. 

Modern Ken, like original Ken all those decades ago, still gives girls the wrong impression: that man would truly be happy providing love and support to his girlfriend, even if the woman is as independent and successful as Barbie.

Let’s take a look through Kens of the past, and hope that he begins to evolve a little more.

Current Ken: Fashionistas Barbie Ken

Courtesy Mattel

2011 Sweet Talkin’ Ken

Courtesy Mattel

2010 Barbie And Ken

Courtesy Mattel

2010 Shavin’ Ken

Courtesy Mattel

1992 Totally Hair Ken

Courtesy Mattel

1990s Barbie And Ken

Courtesy Mattel

1984 Ken

Courtesy Mattel

1979 Barbie And Ken

Courtesy Mattel

1978 Ken

Courtesy Mattel

1970s Barbie And Ken

Courtesy Mattel

1972 Ken

Courtesy Mattel

1962 Ken

Courtesy Mattel

1960s Barbie And Ken

Courtesy Mattel

First Ken: 1961

Courtesy Mattel

from All Of Beer http://allofbeer.com/barbie-looks-like-the-rest-of-us-now-why-doesnt-ken/ from All of Beer https://allofbeercom.tumblr.com/post/181153080622