#brain please let me Do Things :(
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i hate not being able to actually do tasks, I have stuff to do that I actually want to do but I just can't get myself to do those
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hope you feel better soon!
I am riddled with ailments, but I stay silly!
#ask#non mdzs#My health journey has been: Hernia -> acid reflux -> Vocal pain due to aforementioned reflux -> chest infection.#I'm terrified to know what's about to hit me next. Please let it be something kind. PLEASE.#The consequence of living with linguists is that you'll wake up with a wacked up voice -#suddenly you're sitting you down in front of a program called something like Praat having your shimmer and jitter levels calibrated.#They gave me a GRBAS of 33012. I have a fun thing called a pitch break where a whole octave just does not exist.#My vocal pain was bad enough I ended up seeing a speech pathologist and that whole experience was super neat!#I learnt a lot about voice - to be honest I might make a little comic on it after some more research. Fascinating stuff.#For example; your mental perception of our voice modulates the muscles of the vocal folds and larynx.#meaning that when you do have changes (inflammation = more mass = lower frequency)#your brain automatically attempts to correct it to what it 'should sound like'. Leading to a lot more vocal strain and damage!#And it gets really interesting for trans voice care as well - because the mental perception of one's voice isn't based on an existing sampl#So a good chunk of trans voice training is also done with the idea of finding one's voice and retraining the brain to accept it. Neat!#Parkinsonial Voice also has this perception to musculature link! The perception is that they are talking at a loud/normal volume#but the actual voice is quite breathy and weak. So vocal training works on practicing putting more effort into the voice#and retraining the brain to accept the 'loud' voice as 'normal'.#Isn't the human body fascinating?#Anyhow; Now I have vocal exercises and strategies to reduce strain and promote healing.#Which is a lot better than my previous strategy of yelling AAAH in my car until my 'voice smoothed out'.#You can imagine the horror on the speech path's face. I am an informed creature now.#I'm my own little lab rat now. I love learning and researching. Welcome to my tag lab. Class is dismissed.#I'll be back later with a few more answered asks </3 despite everything I'm still going to work and I need the extra sleep.#Thank you for the well wishes! And if you read all of that info dump; thank you for that as well!
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do you ever get reminded of a ship, remember a piece of fanart of it that you loved, then after a day long search realize that you just imagined it? and then try to draw it yourself?
prllb btbtt ALT VERISONS
#since im submitting this to radar: hi! my main blog is stupidusernamepolicy. this is my art sideblog#rick and morty#rick & morty#gravity falls#stan pines#stanley pines#rick sanchez#stanchez#rickstan#stanrick#admin draws#fanart#inspired by spinetrick slightly in the color palette because i didnt wanna do a style copy. but i first imagined it as it being THEIR art#dont. dont ask. i have a weird brain. ive done this shit before.#if im not alone PLEASE sound off. its funny but im also like. please dont let me be the only one.#anyeays. i always loved this ship#i know rick ford was the big thing but i personally think its much funnier if theyre rivals and cant stand each other#bc of science ego and personality differences#all the while rick is canoodling with his brother#i feel like theyre a great match in that theyre kind of immature old conmen who are both game for pretty much anything#RIGHT before i posted i caught a shading issue and also that i forgot stan's five o clock shadow. HA#imagine i posted this yesterday before those fixes. god what a nightmare
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I SWEAR CELEBI'S THINGY IS COMING SOON BUT I REALLY WANTED TO POST THIS ALRIGHT
yeaah... future trio got me too...
and Darkrai is there too, because of course he is.
hey look i drew a cute Drifloon :D
...ignore the rest
whatever started at Darkrai doodles ended in brainrot of future trio + darkrai and I'm blaming @scribz-ag24 for this
#Can you believe between the first pic and the 4th pic is only a week inbetween. I sure can't but like why did I mirror the pose...#ON ACCIDENT??? Everytime I look at the two Grovyles I'm like... how... how did they end up so differently???#also probably blaming @cozybells as well for this but I really fear tagging people so I'm just letting y'all know in the tags because#I do wanna let everyone know who inspired me when someone did <333 better get running [you know who you are!!!!] DusnoirXDarkrai is next...#also: upon seeing scribz-ag24's art my brain said: You need to color too! ah yeah that went well with the doodle batch#I really hope you're able to read everything with how messy I can write sometimes. If not please let me know and I'll add sth in this post!#Also the doodle batch was the first thing I drew so well... never drew dusknoir before and grovyle once i think...#please go easy on me I have yet to explore the relationship between literally everyone😭 and I have no idea what I‘m doing and I'm a little#lost I normally only draw King Boo or Darkrai but I'm sure scribz-ag24 sprinkling in bits of Darkrai got me in love with the future trio to#grovyle#future trio#celebi#darkrai#dusknoir#pmd hero#pokemon#drifloon#totodile#my art#my stuff#tagas friend spoiler#pmd#pokemon mystery dungeon#IS THERE A SHIP NAME FOR FUTURE TRIO... there must be. ...oh... is it just...#futuretrioshipping#i feel sooo stupid rn.#also everytime i drew darkrai i had evil spiteful bastard in mind (except for the one with an arrow pointing out he's redeemed) but i think#i literally mixed every possible version of him in my head so got absolutely no clue what i'm doing :D#anyways i hope you enjoyed this and thanks for reading through my ramblings! Have such a wonderful rest of the day yippiee <333#pmd2
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horror being very specific with table manners and he berates people (dust and killer) for eating like fucking pigs
i think it'd be morbidly funny that because there was no food in horrortale but the cutlery and stuff was all there that maybe he would pretend to eat with no food on the plate. it was in a satirical way that he would joke maybe around horror paps or alone where he would pretend to eat and have really good table manners but then the satire joke became REAL and now horror is incredibly specific about how to eat food
you MUST hold the fork in the left and knife in right says horror. no killer you can't duel wield the fucking knives this is a table not a slaughterhouse. dust pick up your elbows off the table. actually how about you get your entire upper body off the table tf why are you SLEEPING ON THE FOOD??? killer's sitting fetal position in the chair because of course he wouldn't sit normally like the idiot he is. dust is forced to put his hood down and reveal his face no more mysterious shadow style because it puts horror at ease. they cannot have a single peaceful meal because once they get past the table manners phase it then becomes a completion to see who can eat the least (because they suck at everything including eating)
#hey guys. every time i don't post it feels like i'm abandoning my own children#NOOO im sorry i'll come back home... i wont abandon you chat PLEASE DONT MAKE ME PAY MORE CHILD SUPPORT#i've been a busy little bee i snicker out. and by busy i mean playing. and by playing i mean hi3#i'm sorry my brain literally cannot handle having more than one interest. once i get into something else the other thing becomes ignored#IT MAKE ME SO UPSET BECAUSE WHY CAN'T I DO BOTH OF THESE THINGS I LIKE EQUALLY ☹️☹️☹️☹️ is this a me problem#anyways none of these tags were related to the post. i usually do little extra tidbits adding onto the post when i tag huh#i just recently learned (2 years ago) that youre supposed to put the fork and knife in that order. i still mess it up#i've been drawing on this notebook from the same brand from what i drew on in 2019 AND GODDAMN 🤤🤤🤤#this notebook is SO FUCKING SMOOTH I LOVE IT 🤤🤤 drawing on this paper is like drawing on fucking BUTTER it's delectable#a shame nobody likes traditional art i cry out (i'm not particularly skilled in either traditional or digital)#you could call me a jack of no trades master of none#got this idea bcs i was listening to binomi (HARDCORE MARETU FAN SINCE I GOT A PHONE. WHAT YALL KNOW ABOUT MARETU‼️‼️‼️)#and i was like omg food theme.... horror. so i drew it in earlier mentioned notebook#and i was like hmm what positions should i put the fork and knife. and then i got this idea#i KNOW cannibalism songs aren't exactly horror themed. but let me be delusional i wanna give my boy a cool theme and cannibalism is soo coo#killer sans#dust sans#horror sans#murder time trio#tricule hc#bad sanses#bad sans gang#nightmare's gang#this is funny but in a sad way because i added context to it. as is with all my mtt content#it's comedic because i think they're all stupid fucking idiots but i also make them do this dumb shit bc theyre traumatized
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Hehe this man is broken and severely emotionally distressed. Silly lovable guy but given self esteem issues because of the crushing weight of perfectionism. Not so funny if you think about it too long. But at least on the upside he cries pretty :))
No but seriously for all those who relate to Mr. Puzzles just want you to know your accomplishments alone do not define your value and worth as a person. Even when you’re a messy work in progress, you are loved and appreciated more than you may recognize. Thank you for being here. Don’t get me wrong it’s good to be idealistic and set goals, but don’t undermine yourself if you don’t get that perfect score….or if you start to fall behind compared to everyone else. Everyone goes through those moments of doubt or perceived failure. We need to fail every once in a while. And that’s okay
…a-anyways funny goofy dramatic TV guy we love him so much so silly so slay he lives in my head rent free yipeee. This animation is dedicated to him because if anyone in the cast deserved a feature length film it was definitely him, and he sure took up the spotlight in Puzzlevison and absolutely owned it. I’m excited for his future endeavors ✨
#someone please how did I make this in two days wh-#wow wow wow what’s going on here how did I do that this is scary super powers being unlocked right now#Mr. Puzzles hyperfixation give me strength and motivation to get shit done I guess??? yay???#like holy shit I’m so productive in my art all the sudden whats this feeling of dopamine and happiness-#WHAT HAPPENED TO MY DEPRESSION WHERE’D IT GO#sir really stepped into my brain and yeeted my depression saying ‘looks like you won’t be needing that anymore’#and now he things he can just puppeteer me around to make countless art pieces in his image and honor??#he’s using me as his pawn to spread his glorious face around the internet HELP jksjksp#no actally don’t it’s very comfortable and freeing here I love letting my silly fixations go rampant <3#I don’t even need to think about what I want to do art stuff just happens naturally#CHEERS TO FICTIONAL MEN YIPEEE#wow he’s so mentally ill just like me fr /j#also now I’m staring to guilt trip myself because I feel bad watching him cry even though I’M THE ONE WHO ANIMATED IT WHYYYY#hplonesome art#mr. puzzles animation#smg4 mr puzzles animation#mr puzzles smg4 animation#sad mr puzzles#mr. puzzles crying animation#smg4 mr puzzles#mr. puzzles smg4
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Oh hey what about a groundhogs day event where the hero has to relive their traumatic “One Bad Day”-esque backstory but it’s another hero they either know really well and the only way to break the loop is letting that horrible event happen
Bc I’m basic my first thought was “Oh, this would absolutely tear up anyone having to walk down crime alley knowing way too well what’s about to happen”
But I’m also obsessed with my blorbo so my other thought was “Omg lol, imagine if one of the adult heroes ended up in Billy’s body just before his parents left to go die on their dig and think maybe they can save their co-worker the tragedy he faced so young only for every attempt they succeed at getting them to stay keep the loop going and they realize they have to let them go and doom this kid all over again. Haha, extra points if the loop actually lasts from that point to them actually dying so they wake up the next day thinking they failed again only for it to be tomorrow and suddenly Uncle E gets the call that his brother and sister in law are dead and then whoever is in Billy’s body is getting thrown out with a suitcase realizing maybe the nightmare is going to last longer.”
And I just had to laugh bc goddamn my brain cant stop with angst
#‘DC stop making Billy miserable’ I say into the mic#‘I can make it worse’ says my brain ready to swing at the orphan with a sledge hammer#Groundhog Day but body swap basically#even funnier if they DONT know their fellow hero but still realizes the warning flags and tries to save them only to keep waking up#that tragedy of knowing what’s going to happen to someone you care about but the only way to escape is to let it happen#also just the jarring shift back to childhood for a lot of these heroes#other ideas being stuff like one Robin dealing with Dicks One Bad Day doing all they can to save his parents#someone dealing with the day Clark lost his parents/Pa specifically as his Bad Day bc he was too baby for the whole Krypton thing#maybe even a villain/antagonist trying to stop their hero from existing but just ending up sympathetic#then when the day is over they are through a whole character arc and don’t even want to fight anymore bc ‘I am so sorry for your loss’#vice versa too since villains have their Bad Days too#if this has been done for DC please tell me so I can go feral over this idea#dc#billy batson#shazam#batman#fanfic inspo#fanfic ideas#groundhog day#dc comics
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So with my Mom’s cancer being back, my own health stuff, and everything else going on, I’m not sure I’ll be able to be the most active in this round of bookclub (and I do have a lot of words muted and stuff hidden because of mental health and streamlining things and Tumblr's an ass about showing posts sometimes—so if I miss a post, please don’t take it personally!). ): It honestly makes me super upset
But I really hope that everyone has a good time and I can’t wait to see what people cook up! <3 Last time was SO MUCH FUN it makes me a little nervous about living up to those expectations aksjdkajsn But as long as someone has a good time, that's what counts :3
#TrigunBookclub#Tbh I have a lot of ships in general muted/hidden so that I stopped accidentally reblogging things to the trigunart blog lol#Which luckily romance and shipping rarely take root in my brain so *I'm* fine with that#(Don't look at the one obvious elephant in the room)#But it does mean I'll miss stuff#PLEASE let me know if someone's being a dick and I miss it#Absolute zero-tolerance policy for harassing or being cruel to anyone in this house#And also tbh I'm overwhelmed but I'm doing better than I have in previous overwhelmed times#I've been doing a lot of mental word and cut out a lot of toxicity in my life#Even if I'm really raw atm#So I'm okay#As okay as I can be anyway#ANYWAY I just feel so guilty about this#And I don't want anyone to feel bad
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:x
#this is N0T a nagi birthday post#but happy birthday ig ����😒#give me another year and I'll start liking you all the time and not only when you're :x#anyway time to talk about myself in the tags because i'm too embarrased to make actual posts#i have 2 consecutive days of 9+ h tattoo appointments please pray for my sanity#do I get a lunch break?? but how will that work#and it's on my right arm too so I can' t even goof off and do things#let's see what crazy shit my brain will come up with when left to just think while staring at the ceiling#anyway byeee have a good weekend#nagi seishiro#blue lock
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i need to work on my projects but my head is full of pc being remy's wife and getting fucked on the hayloft by wren when remy's away and im SCREEEEEE
#PLEASE LET ME LIVE IN PEACE#JHBERFJBJHERBJHERFBHER#grips my head#im like an insane man i swear#dol#dol related#i need eri being a wife so badly#HERBHJFBJHEJHFBERHJFEF#this is what happens when you keep reading inky's writing every night#you become infested with brainrot HBJWBFHJBHERF#I HAVE TOO MANY THINGS TO DO BRAIN SHUT UP PLS#dean rambles
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do you guys think the writers would have taken it more seriously if it had been alastair around relentlessly tormenting dean in late seasons as opposed to lucifer with sam
#i'm just thinking#like obviously late seasons writers tend to be inconsistent with handling trauma in any case but#like when dean first came back from hell we actually spent a lot of time with it#and with sam yeah we had his hallucinations but late seasons when lucifer is a problem again we only really get like#sam talking abt his trauma with rowena once#and this isn't meant to be dean critical like it's not his fault the writers gloss over how they've put sam into a horror show all alone#i just know dean gets more attention than sam does late seasons and i'm wondering if ppl would've been more willing to deal w it#but also the thought of alastair being around late seasons haunting dean in the way lucifer does sam is kind of awesome#alastair possessing someone in the bunker hmmmmmmmmm#PLEASE add onto this with any thoughts on alastair being around late seasons omg#alastair reviving dean like how lucifer revived sam in beat the devil?#idk alastair was always so much cooler to me than lucifer was maybe thats why my brain is obsessed with this now#i guess maybe like. you could do this same thing with michael. but alastair just seems more interesting to think abt#and amara was around too i guess#but. idk let me have this#anyway#spn#supernatural#sam winchester#dean winchester#alastair spn#lucifer spn
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literally everyone: i hope robotnik and stone kiss in sonic 3
me, crying, crossing my fingers, praying to god himself: I WANNA SEE THEM DANCE TOGETHER, PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE
#now that im thinking abt it i can’t possibly think of a reason for them to do this#the way the movies looking#….contextless end credit scene? please please please??? for me???#please. please. please. crying crying crying#stobotnik dance agenda#if not this let them fight together ………. or something#to me them either having a dance scene or a scene where they fight together#the idea alone drives me insane#doesn’t just ‘satiate me’#it THRILLS me#but it might just be the aro in me talking idk#bro i’m crying rn looked at my acc realized i’ve been manifesting this since fucking . 2022#and now that i’m thinking abt it? it’s definitely not gonna happen#no idk why i want it so bad it’s just a thing i’ve put into my brain for some reason#i’m already coping hard like… ok but if they make a FOURTH sonic movie-
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Obsessed with the POV choice in Imperial Radch as well, both because Leckie does some really wild stuff with how expansive the strict first-person is able to become due to the worldbuilding and who her narrator is, and because it's SO entangled with the central thematic concepts of identity. In the first book flashbacks when the narrator is still a warship, "I" can encompass so many things, and sometimes explicitly refers to different facets in the narration--is "I" Justice of Toren, or One Esk, or a specific segment, or Breq narrating from twenty years in the future? "I" isn't simple, isn't unified, and while this is most literal and obvious with Breq/One Esk/Justice of Toren and Anaander Mianaai's split factions it's true constantly throughout the work at every level of scope. Individual characters struggle with internal conflicts and hit their breaking points--what is it that makes someone decide they have to disobey orders and make a stand or they won't be themself anymore? How do you know who you are if you've been forcibly changed (Tisarwat) or if the world you knew has moved on and become unrecognizable (Seivarden)? How does a character on a colonized world navigate the split identity that comes from the pressure to assimilate to the dominant culture? And then there's the Radch writ large, all the Radchaai so deeply invested in the idea that there is only one true concept of Radchaai society, of civilization, but of course there isn't! It changes based on location and over time, and Breq muses that the Radchaai empire would be largely unrecognizable to the isolated sphere of the Radch itself. In these books, even if you aren't the last remnant of a destroyed spaceship and its legion of bodies, "I" is such a complicated concept and the narrative never lets you forget it.
#imperial radch#i looooove it#first-person but Let's Make It Weird#and that's not even touching on the way Breq can get data from Mercy of Kalr once she's captain#so as long as Ship is watching she can see third-person-style scenes with her crew#and has access to their biometric data#so she can see what they're doing and make guesses about how they're feeling#but sometimes she's very very wrong!#('Seivarden doesn't love me.' girl please.)#and how that's ALSO tangled up in The Themes#because she's not a ship anymore! she only has one human brain so she can only pay attention to one thing at a time#can only watch one scene playing out; can't process all the data that Ship's collecting#can't swap out bodies when she's tired or regulate her own emotions or hold herself or sing with herself#and it reminds her of everything she's lost and it breaks her heart!#but it would also break her heart to give it up.
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this is for the 5 other people that still ship nanago but odyssey!au where gojo is odysseus and nanami is penelope and gojo's been gone for the past 20 years fighting the war against sukuna and nanami who has been left to run the gojo clan and fighting off hordes if suitors and trying to take care of their children, yuuji, nobara, and megumi.
#this au has taken over my brain#bc now im trying to think of what the marriage gift would've been#cause ody carves a marriage bed out of a tree for pen#what would satoru do for kento?#(anything kento wanted honestly)#but maybe a kitchen? a state of the art kitchen that was the very first thing satoru had built for kento#but it has to be something you cant bring out? idk#if anyone has any ideas please let me know#gojo satoru#nanami kento#nanago#gonana#jujutsu kaisen#jjk
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gonna keep making this post forever i guess because it just keeps getting wilder the more time passes and my brain forgets the immediate sensations/experience but i can't believe i got SURGERY. CRAZY. Not even this specific surgery but the fact that I got any surgery at all!!! SO WILD
#LIKE. in the way of me having the courage to get it done - the actual physical taking of my body to the hospital to do it - and#the fact that that's something that could even be done with today's medicine. like that's insane its so crazy. i got surgery.#like it wasnt a big deal at all it was short and easy#but its still wild ykwim. insane. and i didnt even freak out either. calmest ive ever been.#only time ive ever been able to actually fall asleep before a Big Event#talkys#i keep looking at my scars and forgetting and remembering like holy shiiiiit i was in the hospital i was in the surgery room i was in the#recovery room. ME. me and my brain and my body all of us. only us. crazy#<- going to stop here before i start spiraling from further train of thought on the matter#how many ppl in history must have wanted dis for themselves but been unable. i am so grateful i love my vessel now#i hope i get to like it more.... please god let me be able to move out soon#i also said this the last time i made this post but i cant wait to experience more things....#so be it life is still beautiful
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kisses him kisses him kisses him
@naffeclipse you've seen this one but I'm posting it today for the serotonin boost, so have a callback to the first doodles <3
*self insert is not a girl (he/ she)
og detective au by sunnys-aesthetic!
#post let luce#dcamv#bloodstain fool#menace4menace#naffeclipse#my art#i did tax stuff and work emails on top of my normal work today and im still catching up on sleep#so i need to set this loose (luce) in the wild and get some serotonin from watching my self indulgence pop up in my notifs#also bc there is simply no brain left to do anything else today#tomorrow. i did all this bs today so id have a mostly free day tomorrow#i wanna just. soak in self indulgence for the evening#eclipse help me do my taxes please i need someone to validate my frustration with this program#how dare they call it magpie? i like magpies i dont want to associate them with taxes of all things#okay no yeah im. getting off track in the tag ramble so im just gonna hit post. gnight enjoy <3
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