#all the while rick is canoodling with his brother

[slavhew]

do you ever get reminded of a ship, remember a piece of fanart of it that you loved, then after a day long search realize that you just imagined it? and then try to draw it yourself?

prllb btbtt ALT VERISONS

[exceptionimagines]

Dating Cliff and Rick would include~

(Not my gif)(Requested by anonymous)

(I feel like I said their names way too much in this but literally …what else am I gonna call them? They’re both old and somewhat blond, what else do I call them??)

- “More than a brother, less than a wife” my ass. Maybe they weren’t rawdogging it in the back of Cliff’s trailer every weekend, but emotionally? They were married with seven kids. Dating one of them means being the third wheel in your own relationship and if you’re choosing that over being with both of them than I’m sorry but you’re kind of a fucking idiot. 

- Unlike other pairings, Cliff and Rick are already so intimate with each other that becoming a throuple can genuinely begin seamlessly without any of the preceding conflict or hesitation that typically occurs. Usually, a poly relationship starts off with just two people dating before another joins in but I think that the three of you could very easily skip that step and date each other immediately. 

- The only thing that’s really difficult about being in a relationship with the two of them is the fact that they’re both semi-public figures who can’t afford to have a scandal on their hands: i.e. being seen canoodling with what appears to be their best friends girl. You have to decide very carefully who gets to be your “outside” boyfriend and from then on, regulate your affection accordingly. 

- Your personality plays a big role in this decision: if you want to be in the limelight and experience fame secondhand then Ricks going to be your man, if you prefer a much more quiet lifestyle than you’ll let people think that you’re Cliff’s girlfriend, etc, etc. 

- Because of this, hugs are a girls best friend. Not only do both the boys love giving/receiving them but they’re also inconspicuous: no one questions why a person would give a close friend a hug nor can a member of the paparazzi snap a picture and spin a bunch of rumors out of a ‘who knows how long’ embrace. 

- Rick likes holding hands, it’s his go-to form of affection, and though Cliff also enjoys having your fingers intertwined, he’s definitely more of an ‘arm wrapped around you’ kind of guy. If you want to hold the stuntman's hand then you’ll typically have to be the one to initiate it. 

- Pecks on the lips. They love when you surprise them with one/give them one yourself. 

- Both of them are suckers for a good, slow kiss. It’s why you can’t kiss them in public: too scandalous, too sexy....

- Sitting in Ricks lap or laying against Cliff’s chest when the three of you sit together. 

- Rick is a laying in the crook of your neck kind of guy while Cliff is either the big spoon or the “bed itself”: wrapping his arms around you while you lay almost completely on top of him. When you’re all sleeping together, Cliff kind of takes the backburner and lets Rick have you; though he always smiles when you blatantly make an effort to touch in some way too. 

- Both of them use the pet name “honey” but other than that, they typically refer to you in wildly different ways. Rick enjoys babying you and calling you things like buttercup, sugarplum, and things that end in “puss”, while Cliff keeps things simple and sticks to “sunshine” and things like that. 

- Cliff fixes things around the house and does acts of service to show his love; along with spending almost all of his time with you. He’s a man of few words while Rick is a man of many, telling you that he loves you constantly while clinging to you like a baby. Rick’s time tends to be limited but he makes up for it when he is home and that’s all that matters.

- Watching all of their television and movie appearances. If you’re an actress, they do the same for you, and even if you aren’t, Rick has probably gotten you a small part in at least one of his shows. He’s a proud puppy whenever you appear on screen, patting your knee excitedly while they both say things like “look at you!!”.

- Helping Rick rehearse for his lines and letting Cliff show off for you; as well as play fighting with him and letting him teach you how to do safe little stunts.

- Cliff knows you can take a tumble while Rick thinks you'll break if he so much as bumps shoulders with you. It’s the reason Cliff is arguably more fun to be around; at least when you’re in the mood to just be fucking tossed.

- You and Rick wearing Cliff’s glasses. You can’t help it …they’re cool  :(.

- Cliff driving the two of you around. He honestly scares the shit out of you with the way he so expertly swerves in and out of highway lanes whenever you’re in his car. Scared yet aroused....

- Going out to dinner together.

- Hanging out in Rick’s pool.

- Rick is a typical glitz and glamor kind of person when he’s picking out gifts for you while Cliff aims to get you more personal, occasionally odd but very “you”, sorts of presents.

- Making sure Rick tones it down with the drinking and keeping Cliff out of trouble.

- Cliff could cut his finger off and not even flinch while Rick will get a minor head cold or a papercut and act like it’s the end of the world. He’s an absolute drama queen and will force either you and/or Cliff to be his nurse.

- Sometimes, you take care of Rick so much that you feel a little guilty for “neglecting” Cliff; even though he assures you that it’s alright and that he doesn’t feel like you are. You’ll proceed to healthily love bomb him and give him your full attention for a while, and though he’ll continue to reassure you that you “don’t gotta worry bout [him]”, he can’t deny that it’s the most comfort he’s felt in years.

- Cliff is a little embarrassed for you to see where he lives; especially since you spend so much time around Rick’s place, but you always assure him that you don't mind and you prove that you don’t by wanting to be there and visiting him whenever you can. He doesn’t want to get married ever again but boy do you make it tempting when you’re standing in his tiny kitchen, making him dinner with a smile on your face.

- Brandy is with you 24/7. She’s adopted you and she’s very protective of her new human; just like Cliff taught her to be. She’s still a “daddy’s girl” but you’re a very close second and you should feel very honored.

- Cliff can always tell when somethings the matter while Rick tends to be a bit more oblivious; which kind of sucks because Rick is definitely the one you’d probably prefer talking to whenever you’re upset.

- It’s not that Cliff is bad at consoling you, it’s just that he’s less …emotionally available. Rick is much more comfortable having a deep and emotional conversation while Cliff is more of a “bury your emotions” kind of guy; even if he’s happy to lend an ear and shoulder to cry on whenever you need it.

- You and Cliff hyping Rick up and giving him motivational speeches.

- Helping to soothe and calm Rick down whenever he has a crisis. It’s a little more socially acceptable for him to hug a woman in front of the Mexicans....

- There’s zero jealousy between the two of them and since you’re in a poly relationship, they typically feel as though there’s no reason for them to be jealous of anyone else either; your relationship is a little hard to threaten as an outsider. But, on occasion, someone will rub them the wrong way and either one or both of them will come over and make it obvious that you’re “off limits”. 

- If somethings the matter, Cliff handles it. Rick is protective too but it’s almost always Cliff who does the heavy lifting and who’s ready to pick a fight the minute he see’s that you’re upset. Rick is more of a worrier than an doer. 

- Arguments tend not to happen in your relationship. The three of you have an “us against the world” mentality so if you’re upset at someone, it’s usually at an outsider. 

- But, for the few times you do fight, it’s usually you and Rick arguing; mainly because Cliff is a terrible person to argue with. Almost all fights are calm and collected: you bicker and then you come to a resolution or give each other space until it doesn't matter any more. 

- Both of you tend to apologize, even if it was just one person who was technically in the wrong and then you spend the rest of the day being all lovey dovey with each other. 

- As I said before: Rick tells you that he loves you constantly while Cliff is a man of few words. The stuntman prefers to show his love rather than say it and you’ve come to understand what certain actions of his “really mean”. 

- Cliff isn’t keen on getting married for a second time while Rick would be over the moon to have a wife; which honestly just makes things easier. Both of them lowkey want a family so be prepared for that conversation after you’ve been together for a while....

[belphegor1982]

Thought I’d make a the Mummy/Returns fic recs posts for @counterwiddershins (EDIT: whom I can tag now!) because they asked for recs. So here are my favourite (complete) Mummy stories under the cut in alphabetical order, title-summary-why it’s on my list style. A few are Old, because I discovered this fandom in 2003 and there’s some great oldies. Hope you - and anyone else looking for great fics - enjoy them!

As Sweet as This / Coming Clean, by robot-iconography

Summary:  Evelyn reflects on the changes Ahm Shere has wrought upon her brother, husband, and son. /  Rick takes his life in his hands as he faces his greatest challenge ever: fatherhood.

Comments: I put these two in the same bag because they’re basically a diptych. They’re like two sides of the same coin. On one hand, you have a lovely story in Evy’s voice, on the other, a hilarious one in Rick’s. Both stories are sweet and more touching than they sound.

Circumstantial Evidence, by robot-iconography

Summary: “She could be damnably silly at times; she dressed like a spinster and carried herself like bloody royalty; but she was my baby sister, the only one I’d ever have. I’d been through hell to get her back, and now I was going to lose her anyway.”

Comments: Probably my favourite Mummy story ever. I love it so much I translated it into French in 2004, and even more so now I’ve read PG Wodehouse. Basically, there is canoodling, funny misunderstandings, and the closing scene is adorable (and made me discover Ella Fitzgerald’s “Always”, which is perfect as Ella Fitzgerald always is). Peak Carnahan siblings shenanigans and a great Rick.

Deeper Within Darkness, by Laurie M

Summary: It is a truth universally acknowledged that wherever Rick O'Connell and Evelyn Carnahan are, trouble is not far away. What begins as an innocent night out soon leads to danger that threatens all of Egypt.

Comments: a great follow-up on the 1st film, with still-developing relationships, a mysterious medallion, and ghostly (sort of) crocodiles. The main four are very well written. 3rd person limited POVs alternate with 1st person POVs in a very natural way, allowing us glimpses into the characters’ heads. Sometimes a little bit sombre, but a lovely story.

A Favour for a Friend, by queueingtrilobite [orphan account]

Summary: Roped into doing a favour for a friend, Jonathan finds himself in charge of an antiques shop in Cairo. This is honestly the very last favour he's going to do for anyone. Ever.

If you ship Ardeth and Jonathan, there’s plenty of fun and/or feelsy stories for you! Like this fun little romp, which features a hilarious style, a Jonathan who is equally good at thinking on his toes as he is as making disasters happen (being a bit of a disaster himself).

Finding Ma’at, by exchequered [orphan account]

Summary: “Hamunaptra Cruises.” Ardeth’s tone was thoughtful. “Do you not fear a curse upon your enterprise, for naming it thus?”

Another Ardeth/Jonathan fic - and boy, this one is *chef’s kiss* I mean, the only three tags are Tourism, Pining, and denial is a river in Egypt :D

Hereafter, by Marxbros

Summary: After TMR. Imhotep has raised Ancksunamun and conquered the earth. Rick, Evy, Ardeth, Jonathan, and some new characters must find each other to defeat Imhotep once more.

Comments: ooh, this one’s a monster to tackle (134k words), and it gets pretty epic - and is worth every second of reading. The OCs are great, necessary, and everyone gets their chance to shine.

Never Spellbound by a Starry Sky, by robot-iconography

Summary: Strange goings-on mar Rick and Evelyn's wedding preparations. Can they and Jonathan solve the mystery?

Comments: another follow-up on TM, as Evy and Rick navigate their relationship and how much they should wait before any sort of hanky-panky. Life interferes in the form of a mysterious object (though NOT the obvious one) and the three are thrust into adventure again. There are battles with the mosquito netting, someone getting a few stitches on their arse (again, not the obvious choice), and all the chapter titles come from dialogue from Elizabeth Peters’ Crocodile on the Sandbank. It’s often hilarious and the dialogue is to die for.

The Mummy: Curse of the Seven Scorpions, by Jac Danvers

Summary: Libby O’Connell hasn’t heard from her brother in years. The word ‘mummy’ meant nothing to her. But when a tiny gold scorpion is revealed to have much greater value, she is thrust back into her family’s life, and the life of a man she once hated.

Comments: back in the day, the “Rick’s sister tags along and falls in love with [usually Ardeth]” trope was a staple of Mummy fanfic, and one I didn’t have much interest in. This little story, mostly set after TMR, is a fun romp; Libby is a good character, well handled, and the little developing romance with Jonathan is fun to watch.

Sidekick, by madsthenerdy girl (on FFnet here)

Summary: Jonathan honestly tries to be a big brother. No, really.

Comments: Fantastic portrait of Jonathan through the years, warts and all, and his relationship with Evy (and later Alex). It’s heartfelt, often funny, and honest (sometimes painfully).

Take That, Bembridge Scholars!, by seren-ccd

Summary: The world has been saved and there's really only one thing left to do. Evy writes a strongly worded letter to the Bembridge Scholars. Oh, she gets married, too. 

It’s a great look at Evelyn, Rick and Jonathan in a few scenes, from the night after Hamunaptra to the start of Rick’s and Evy’s life as a married couple, interspersed by extracts from the aforementioned strongly-worded letter (and it’s great).

The Tenth Plague, by Khedi (on FFnet here)

Summary: Did anyone while watching The Mummy wonder about what would have happened if the tenth of the Biblical plagues had come to pass?

Not a death fic (well, not quite) but a great little look at (again, I’m nothing if not predictable) the Carnahan siblings just after they get back to Cairo after The Mummy. It’s a punch in the feels and a hug. I love it.

Travelers by Night, by 20thcenturyvole

Summary: Very quickly, Jonathan weighed the odds. On one hand, potential death, whether by armed bandits, a mummy’s curse, or people who looked like bandits and who were very angry about someone unleashing a mummy’s curse. On the other hand, potential riches, home ground, and topics of conversation other than what happened at school fifteen years ago and who got it in the neck where.

A great look at Jonathan post-first film and a great take on Ardeth, too. Can be shippy if you tilt your head and squint, or not. Your call.

We Three Together series, by Tinydooms

Basically a series that can act as a novelisation for The Mummy, mostly “missing scenes” and character studies. A joy to read if you like Evy, Rick, and Jonathan.

The Witches’ Library, by jones2000 (on FFnet here)

Summary: He would like to state emphatically for the record that none of this was his fault, thank you very much. It was all entirely coincidental. He should know by now that these things have a tendency to snowball. Or, Jonathan doesn't need the O’Connells to find trouble.

Comments: I read this last year and it immediately made my shortlist of favourites, on top of hitting me in the heart and over the head with the subtlety of a freight train. I even made a rec post about it. The writing is so sharp it might as well be written with a bloody scalpel, the OCs are fascinating, and Jonathan is somewhat jaded but still wonderfully entertaining. It’s the only post-WW2 Mummy story I’ve ever loved (read?), and certainly the only one that incorporates Tomb of the Dragon Emperor elements I’ve ever loved. Give it plenty of reviews, it deserves them.

Edited to add a few and make it more dash-friendly :o)

Also, I wrote a few things if you’re interested:

After the Sunset: What’s left to do, after saving the world and riding triumphantly into the setting sun? A lot, as it turns out. Our Heroes ride camels, negotiate the shift from acquaintances and allies to something like a family, and encounter a couple of surprises good and bad on the way back from Hamunaptra. (Or, the one where Evelyn and Rick discover the contents of their saddlebag, Jonathan finds out that whiskey doesn’t quite cut it when a scarab has burrowed its way into your hand and arm and out your shoulder, and Ardeth gives his name and saves the day. Well, night.)

Long one-shot set just after “the end” of The Mummy.

Fairy Tales and Hokum: 1937: Two years after the events of Ahm Shere, the O’Connells are “required” by the British Government to bring the Diamond taken there from Egypt to England. In Cairo, while Evelyn deals with the negotiations and Rick waits for doom to strike again, Jonathan bumps into an old friend of his from university, Tom Ferguson. Things start to go awry when the Diamond is stolen from the Museum and old loyalties are tested...

This one is looong. It’s 160k+ words. (also took me 16 years to finish but shhh)

Carnahan-O’Connells musings and snapshots: Headcanons and one-shots about the disaster family.

Like it says on the tin - mostly headcanons with a few actual stories with dialogue.

I know, there’s not a lot of them, but they’re my very favourites. If you have other recs, feel free to add them!