#both have their value
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this is probably going to be long
OK, I lived through the AIDS crisis. I was a young person questioning my sexuality at arguably the worst possible time in American history. I discovered the word "bisexual" (hooray I have a label) only to read a few days later in mainstream news about how "bisexuals were responsible for spreading AIDS to the hetero community" which was a take that was tolerated on national news shows at the time. The only sex education I had in my entire public education was a film we were forced to watch about how you could get AIDS from french kissing (you can't) and heavy petting (which we didn't know what it was because it was outdated old people code for oral lol)...
The entire LGBTQIA plus community was not attacked as a monolith, the focus of hate came on gay men, because they were the most obviously effected and also the most visible and prominent in the community. The rest of the community did their best to embrace and protect them. (For example lesbian groups that were on the front lines of caring for people who were sick when no one else would...).
And there were people like myself who identified as allies but were in a place where they didn't feel safe to come out themselves. I did not come out at that time because even though I was in accepting local community at University and working at a feminist journal I knew I would lose friends and family and possibly future work opportunities. Being Bi it was easier to blend in for me and I took advantage of that. Part of the reason I hesitated so long about coming out was I felt a lot of guilt that I didn't come out in the 90s during the AIDS crisis. I felt like a coward who wasn't worthy to stand with such brave people.
It took me a long time to let go of that self-hate to the point where I could come out. A big part of it was acknowledging how fucked up the climate for LGBTQIA folks in the 80s and 90s. We had two family friends (which is how I knew I would probably be rejected by a lot of my family) who died of AIDS. Yes, these were brilliant, creative men who worked in theater. One of them was the props coordinator for Late Night with David Letterman (responsible for building Dave's velcro suit etc.). I also have a peer who died of AIDS in the early 2000s, long after the disease had supposedly been "not a death sentence" who also happened to be an actor.
Despite their lack of political involvement, they were be seen as radical just because they lived openly as gay men in a society that hated them and wanted them dead, and only tolerated them if they were the "fun gays" who weren't actually threatening the status quo...
Being in theater or the arts was a survival tactic for a lot of people ya know because it was a more accepting environment and because it wasn't considered important like politics, medicine, science etc. (Miss me with the gays can't do math jokes. A gay man invented the fucking computer).
The gay men I knew in long-term monogamous relationships survived the worst of the crisis and they automatically became "respectability queers" for having not died and wanting jobs with health insurance etc. Because one dude follows his dream of working in theater and the other quits theater and goes to work at the phone company and buys a house with his partner, one is fun and the other boring? One is a creative genius creating culture and the other is a consumer of cultural pap? Wow. Great take.
FUCK. I'm just getting so angry thinking about this. You want to know why it took me till I was FIFTY fucking years old to come out: AIDS. That's it. ONE Fucking word.
Sorry I have no idea WHY I fucking started this other than I saw a shitty post that said, our culture became boring because all the fun gays died and left only the boring gays who only care about marriage or whatever.
#Also: what the fuck is wrong with CATS and ghostbusters???#both are great#both have their value#if you want to bitch about marvel or shitty broadway musicals then do it#please don't throw all the old gays under the bus for being boring while you do it#also there was that post yesterday about Anthony Perkins and I did not realize he died of AIDS#I don't know how I missed it...oh it happened in 1992 when I wasn't living at home and didn't have a tv...#sometimes the sex positive bubble of tumblr will prefer the LOLZ lifetime achievment of fucking take#over the he was conflicted because all of society hated him for being gay and many many shitty people rejoiced I'm sure when he died take#as they did when other prominent gay men died of AIDS#PS: those are the same people trying to pass legislation attacking trans people#the same fucking people
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the whole guilt-tripping language in posts about important topics paired with how I'm still getting bitches in my notes talking about why it's actually good to tell "bad" people to kill themselves continues to prove to me that a lot of people have absolutely no concept of social justice or activism outside of assuming the worst of and then viciously attacking strangers on the internet
#the worst part too is this is just the logical conclusion of the hyper-individualistic society#that thrives on isolating us from each other and our communities#anyway pls get out and go volunteer to clean up litter or at the soup kitchen or something#y'all need to see that your actions can have both good and bad real world consequences#and also interact with people who share your values but come from different walks of life#and also how to organize with people you don't always 100% agree with#so yeah hang out at the farmer's market or smthn y'all really need to connect with your communities
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All he knows is flirt with men and lie.
[First] Prev <–-> Next
#poorly drawn mdzs#mdzs#su she#jin guangyao#Jin Guangyao smelt the 'no one appreciates me' wafting off this guy and said 'is anyone else going to manipulate that to their benefit?'#Su minshan fans...I get it. He's so deep into his role as a pawn he thinks he might have a chance of being someone bigger in this game.#He does play a key role but he's never actually out of anyone's shadow! That's brutal!#JGY's manipulation games are always so fun to see in action. His words are his weapon!#He's getting verbally kicked around only to have someone acknowledge his achievements! Just like how NMJ did for JGY.#He is a master of honeyed words and gentle appreciations. His instrument is *your* heartstrings.#He might see himself in Su She; They both feel under valued and hungry for more importance -#-but it's also a means for JGY to know how to pull his strings.#(IN THIS MOMENT. I very much realize he does come to care for him later on.)#It is also funny how much his powerplays involve sweet talking men. Where did he learn that from?#(Most likely the brothels he grew up in. It's a kick in the gut once you see that link!)
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adore the concept of calling DSMP a modern folk tale because it truly is
it has shifted and changed and grown beyond what it originally was and it’s even more beautiful for that. there’s very little that is considered the exact correct story, it’s more like many versions that can all somehow be simultaneously true.
lots of the content is lost to time or difficult to find but the story lives on despite that because of the love people have for it. for the way we are willing to pass on what we know and our own interpretations of it. for the preservation that so many have put into not letting it fade away forever. for the way many have allowed it to inspire their own creations going forward.
just like mythology or folk lore you don’t have to know every tiny detail or every version or even what exactly was said by every person to understand who these characters are and what they mean to you.
dsmp as a story is about love and loss and power and comedy and tragedy, just like any other great story, and as long as someone cares enough to speak of it, the story will never fully die.
#and similarly some parts have been tainted by time but it can have value despite that#guys can you tell i’m autistic about both verbal tradition and minecraft roleplay#dream smp#dsmp#mcyt#dsmpblr#c!tommy#tommyinnit#technoblade#mcytblr#mythology#folklore#lost media#minecraft
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To be frank, I find the introvert/extrovert discourse online insane and completely ridiculous. People will fight to the death about if a character, Elizabeth Bennet, is an introvert or an extrovert, and people: they are opposites. If I/E aren't easy to tell apart for a main character of a novel, the categories are meaningless. But then oddly, considering that no one can tell I/E apart, extroverts are also some weird totally different species from introverts.
But Elizabeth Bennet is an extrovert and checks every single extrovert box and the reasons real internet people keep giving that she isn't are bonkers:
She takes solitary walks. I have some crazy news for you, extroverts can walk. I, a certified extrovert, take solitary walks nearly every day because I have a dog, whom I adopted knowing I would take her on these walks. It's shocking I know; I don't even die of loneliness at all! Consider for a moment that Elizabeth Bennet spends all day surrounded by four sisters and a very talkative mom, not surprising she takes walks alone occasionally. You'll also notice that she does invite her sisters along most of the time.
She reads. More shocking news: extroverts can read. Some of them read a lot. You know enjoying being around other people doesn't exclude reading. In fact, in the Regency you could even read aloud as a group activity! That is something we see in the novel. And Elizabeth also puts down her book when she finds a conversation more interesting.
She processes issues internally. That is not her preference, she likes to talk it out with Jane. When she's leaving Hunsford, Elizabeth is desperate to finally talk with Jane about all the crazy stuff that has happened to her, but she is forced to conceal a good deal of it because it's about Jane. She can't discuss Darcy with the Gardiners because his proposal is a secret, but she is eager to talk about the Lydia thing and learn her uncle's opinion. Also, extroverts are fully capable of processing internally, because again, not a different species.
She has trouble talking/feels awkward after the second proposal. Who wouldn't be awkward? Do people honestly think extroverts never feel awkward??? Not even when they love a guy that they verbally destroyed a few months ago? Not even during a confession of love? We uh... do. We get awkward too. In fact, sometimes when an extrovert talks rapidly, they are trying to talk their way out of an awkward situation. I have to work myself up to making phone calls.
Anyway, it drives me totally up the wall. Elizabeth Bennet is an extrovert, she thrives around people. Both end couples, Jane & Charles and Elizabeth & Darcy, are introvert/extrovert pairings, which is fun. If you want an introverted heroine, Jane Austen wrote five of them and they are all excellent: Elinor Dashwood, Marianne Dashwood, Fanny Price, Jane Bennet, and Anne Elliot. Catherine Morland, Emma Woodhouse, and Lady Susan round out the extroverts. It's awesome that Austen had such range in heroines.
#rant#extrovert vs. introvert#pride & prejudice#elizabeth bennet#jane austen#I won't even get into the fact that extroverts are aliens and introverts are God's most special little beans#because I'm not going to be whiny#but honestly I/E isn't a value judgment#we need all kinds#and most people are friends with both types#I may have woken up and chosen violence
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ep 43 had me tearing up in a fucking shopping centre ‼️‼️
b+w alt version that I truly couldn't decide if I liked it more . Also I included a lot of thoughts in the tags but they're somewhat incoherent<3
#i dont know what i expected but i was waiting for a friend and too excited to wait until later#malevolent podcast#john doe#john doe malevolent#john malevolent#malevolent fanart#grimm art#ep 43#ep 43 left me with a lot of thoughts ... i didnt quite like how much of a recap it felt like at times but that might#be because ive been relistening and like yeah everyone knows that john 🙄 but that's not the case for everyone and with monthly uploads#things get forgotten easily#i find the discussion of “humanity” so interesting because John has shown that without someone that he has forcibly grown to value as an#equal... something he cannot do as the king of yellow as he is superior to all of his realm and presumably stays out of other elder god's#anyway. without that equality and enviroment to grow he fails to reach his goal of compassion and falls onto old ways.#John. The King in Yellow. shown by both times each has found themselves in human form do not just crave power and influence!!!#THEY CRAVE COMMUNITY!!! an endrich being not born or raised with nothing but power and ego#CRAVES COMMUNITY.#His goal of “humanity” is not a selfless goal like John projects - it is ultimately somewhat selfish as he does not want to be alone!!#which makes this desire so much more human#i don't know maybe this is just me spelling out whats already there but the way john and the witch argued about humanity frustrated me#it felt like they were missing the point or that perhaps the “good/evil” “black/white” retoric was already realised by me and john needed#realise it himself . which is fair !!!#i dont know!!!!#the witch was talking about how bad everyone was and how humanity is cruel and john was talking about Lily (#who also frustrates me how shes used in the plot somewhat she was literally just a nurse doing her job bro#) but to John - yes internally he is struggling with his moral greyness and im so proud of him for growing being himself SO PROUD#JUST.!!! he wants community. he needs community. he loves his friend. 'humanity' at its core does not matter as long as you try to be bette#and i think thats awesome and i really enjoyed the episode#guhh im rambling enjoy my tag rambling i dont know i want john to have more friends :(#yorrick can be another friend godd i love you yorrick so silly
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Headcanon that, as Timmy gets older, he kind of starts to hate his last name. He already has some bad connotations with his full name after the Wishology situation (Timmy having a fear-response to his own name lives in my head rent free), but the older he gets, the more he dislikes it.
It's the last name of his parents, who neglect him and don't try to learn the first thing about him. It's the name that teachers snap at him when he's failed yet again. It's another reminder that the family he has with his fairies isn't really his and he can't keep them. He doesn't have a single good connection to his last name.
Anyway, all of this to say that I'm thinking about the way Jimmy says Timmy's last name in Part 3 of the crossover. Not with disappointment or disdain, but fondness. Like it's just Timmy's name. He uses his last name, "Turner," and it doesn't mean "terrible student" or "useless kid," it means "friend." Like Jimmy looks at him and just sees a person instead of everything that everyone's ever told Timmy is wrong with him.
#fairly oddparents#timmy turner#nicktoons unite#jimmy neutron#jimmytimmy#timmyjimmy#jerkinators#am I thinking a little too hard about this? perhaps#I'm just kind of a little bit obsessed with timmy going to other dimensions and being WANTED there#like he has that whole episode about feeling unwanted and then s6 has the fairy-lympics episode—#—where the pixies and anti fairies were both clamoring for his approval#so many fairies showed up for his birthday!!#so many fairies LOVE timmy like THEY HAVE A STATUE OF HIM OMG#and in retroville timmy has five friends who think he's amazing!!#sure Jimmy took a while to warm up to him#but they're BUDDIES#they're a great team!!#in jimmy's dimension timmy is VALUED and WANTED#follow me for more normal thoughts in the dead of night
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devotionduo so codependent that when they try to be less so they end up hurting each other what if i kms
#mine.txt#zam hated being relied on so Heavily in s5 so now mapicc values team interindependence to a level that i dont think?? hes had before#which means hes taken more liberty in grinding for himself and his teammates a lot more than he used to#and because zam places a lot of value in himself in being the team grinder he feels useless and unneded#and since zams a huge grinder it means mapiccs main method of helping him is through violence but since hes a pacifist this season#and while technically zam is fine with other ppl killing and most importantly killing For him; he doesnt really have any beef that requires#killing as a form of revenge which means mapicc cant do the main thing that zam (and anyone else really) uses him for#and they both want to do and be more for the other but theyre stuck at a standstill cause theyre in uncharted territory#cause theyre friendly but not teamed (or even pseudo-teamed like in early s5)#i will say tho mapes more active in trying to find ways to hang out with zam#but if there isnt a clear opportunity to do so hes so Weird about it lmao like he basically just kinda. hovers over him lmao#whether in chat or otherwise#but when an opportunity Does present itself tho he seizes on it basically immediately#like the stalking is easy pickings but theres also gaias hand and literally anytime zam asks him to kill someone for him#ok but seriously tho the fact that mapicc basically declared them as teammates (even if its not official)#after he finished with the stalking was so sdfsdklaghsaljh#like bruh why does zam even have doubts about mapicc prioritizing him above everyone else he doesnt even do all that for his actual team 😭#devotions
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for my money, labru is head and shoulders above other ships involving them simply due to the unmatched yap potential, i imagine them feeding off each other's energy like they're slipstreaming in mario kart until they start going fast enough to break the sound barrier
#dungeon meshi#dunmesh spoilers#labru#the Compounding Yap Effect#thinking about kabru wanting to understand the value of monsterhood despite how much pain they caused him ...#laios wanting to understand the value of humanity despite how much pain they caused him ...#none of this even mentioning how much kabru needs a person like laios to spur his character growth#kabru is a schemy schemer who schemes and it's one of his best qualities#but it's also what gets him killed over and over again in an attempt to get closer to laios and co when none of his usual tricks worked#it took until the absolute 11th hour where kabru HAD to choose#between potentially unlocking the secrets of the dungeon or giving it up to the canaries and losing his chance forever#if kabru had fallen back on what he knew he would have killed laios then and never got what he wanted#laios forcing kabru to be honest with his feelings#(a feeling kabru had buried so deep he was barely aware he had it in the first place)#is what finally gets laios to stop and listen#and he finally gives kabru enough of a reason to trust him and make kabru stop the canaries and give the party time to escape#and it's ONLY then that kabru is able to get what he wants#legit i cant imagine a more fulfilling ending for kabru than getting to directly engage his interest in a way that directly helps people#with someone who both needs wants and sincerely appreciates his skills#literally riding off into the sunset gay ass ending im#im going to be sick#day 28 being normal about them
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choreman is the beautiful love story between two men who are so deeply morally fucked and repressed and who have been through hell together but who are still both. at their core. deeply boring and uninteresting people. their ideal date is going out to a nice restaurant together and sharing a bottle of wine. they go home every night to a picture perfect apartment that they clean together every sunday afternoon and read medical journals next to each other on the couch. they play video games together on the weekends semi-regularly and it’s the closest either of them ever get to having a hobby. on special occasions chase gets foreman a new tie and foreman gets chase a new cologne and then they have sex in missionary and fall asleep at a reasonable hour.
#they yearn to be normal and they could achieve normalcy in each other#i mean. theyre both fucked in the head so theyd definitelh both WANT to have crazy kinky sex together#and do exciting things#but i think what theyd most value in each other#is that they understand each other’s desire to just be regular and boring#and to be at peace with each other#they both have stressful jobs they dont need that sort of constant excitement/stimulation in their personal life#choreman#robert chase#eric foreman#house md
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arthur pendragon, you come to me as a long lost son. I would gladly hold your head up and feed you soup when you're sick, cheer for your victories and grieve for your pain. I want to brush your hair and make little braids and laugh as you knot it trying to untangle them
merlin. I need to breed you.
#I don't like to be coarse or I would have made a joke about knotting being involved in both#anyway#merlin#arthur#bbc merlin#arthur pendragon#this is how I feel about them. okay#mind your business#and do NOT call simone de beauvoir into this. the traditional family values get counteracted by the a/b/o dynamic
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For being the only animals in the crew do Dribble and Spitz go to a regular doctor like everyone else or do they go to a vet? (This question was on my mind for a while-)
Yeah
#doodles#warioware#did you read my mind because I was just the other day thinking about the animal situation in warioware#and how weird it is. Because at first you take it at face value right. You have humans and you have furries and they both pay taxes.#But in warioware twisted joe tells you that he's one of the only “working dogs” in his family and that most of his family are pets. WHAT!
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okay @biaweck brought this old piece to my attention in their recent post, and also made me go through all my old uploads to double check [horrific]. But apparently I never actually uploaded this one, so:
My bad! 😛
This was started all the way back on January 27th of 2023, so it's like a whole year and a half old. Honestly, didn't age too horribly, I might redo this one at a later date [also Mike smokes, and you can't convince me otherwise [well kinda [see tags]]]
This redesign also REALLY needs an update or two, it was really hashed together at the time [which is a reason why it wasn't ever uploaded, if I were to guess]
#not a cigar that's a cigarette he's just small#but also#he smokes it as if it WAS a cigar☝️#look up the process if you're curious I'm not trying to hit the tag limit#because he's over the top#and tries to make his life seem a lot more rich than it actually is#in both emotional and material value! yippee!#lemme know if yall want a character study/headcanon post#I have SO much to say about this fucker LMAO#anyway- thanks Bia for pointing this out to me!#sing movie#sing 2016#sing 2021#mike the mouse#fanart#anthro#furry#digital art#old art
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When they said “blend in with the crowd,” they didn’t mean that. | From this scene in Winter Soldier because I saw it again and had to recreate it with these two
Bonus:
Feat. Poppy forgetting that Ominis is blind
#hogwarts legacy#sebastian sallow#ominis gaunt#poppy sweeting#fanart#hogwarts legacy mc#sebastian x mc#I’m sorry I HAD to#someone pls stop me#i’m having too much fun#I realized I really enjoy drawing people kissing?#something I’m kinda proud of? idk lol#we love boss babes that take initiative and cute flustered boys#Am I the only one that thinks poppy and ominis would be cute together?#like they both come from families whose values don’t align with theirs?#no? Just me?#Poppy is so cute I surprisingly really enjoyed her quest line!#sebastian sallow x mc
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elio is such a sweetie. mc teasing him during volleyball n he immediately is reminded of percy he loves his friends so bad….
he really does! lol, we wrote in so many moments for elio with his boys (and vice versa) because are you really best friends if you aren't a little in love with each other?
#keyframes asks#one of my favorite duos to write is always elio and jamie though lmao#like i love writing percy and elio because they're both such goobers#but w jamie and elio they hang out but at face value you'd have no idea why
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When discussing or analyzing Dazai, one thing I hope you will keep in mind when reading anything I write about him is that from my perspective, he is always, always both.
What do I mean by this? Well, I find there tends to be a general split among people who hold the opinion that "he's a manipulator and will always be manipulative" and "he's doing his best to be good and helpful and live up to Oda's last wishes for him", of which, neither is completely right - because he is both. But even among the people who hold to this dual-nature interpretation, I find that his individual actions and motivations still tend to be thought of in a dichotomous manner - is it manipulative, or genuine?
Again, I think it's always both.
Dazai has a very pragmatic view on a lot of things - he is always looking for the usefulness of things and people so that the situation turns out in his favour. He's incredibly adept at this, and his prediction and placement and careful reveals are all manipulation tactics to get his allies and enemies doing exactly what he needs them to. I don't think anyone can contest this since we see it over and over in the series.
But that's not all there is to it. He's not solely manipulative and he does, to some extent, sympathize with others - I think there are several instances of this in the series, but I want to stress that this has been apparent since Chapter 1!
For context, Dazai is recalling what Atsushi said to him a few minutes earlier, but it's very interesting that it should be this specific part of the conversation. He could've flashed back to the part where Atsushi said he had nowhere to go; no money, no food - he is about to trick him into joining, after all, and this is the key piece he uses to basically force Atsushi into the Agency. But instead it's Atsushi's self-deprecation that catches his attention, and it really does, because even during the conversation, he turns to look at him after he says this with an odd expression.
You could say that this makes Atsushi easier to manipulate, if that's your angle, but that can't be solely it, because in the later conversation with Hirotsu, we know Dazai was planning to bring Atsushi into the Agency and set him up as one half of the new Double Black the moment he met him. The panel shown there is the riverbank, set much earlier in the day than this scene. He was already planning to pair him with Akutagawa since he figured out he was the tiger, so what's with this reaction?
Well. Sometimes the simplest explanation is the best.
He manipulated Atsushi into joining with the intention of utilizing him in his future plans. He also helped him and gave him a place to belong, and importantly, he likes this kid! It's both.
I think much of it might be that his brain just kinda works way too fast - he's such a natural at crafting these elaborate plots and seeing how things connect and gathering useful people like resources that it's practically automatic - though this is not a great means when you're trying to be a kinder person. There's an omake, I believe, that has him saying "I like using my head for justice", i.e. using these underhanded means to act for the better. Not great, but those are the kind of gifts he has. He's way more suited to exploitation, but is choosing to use these tactics to save people now, which is quite reminiscent of what he tells Kyouka. Kyouka's talents lie in killing people - when what you're good at isn't who you want to be, what do you do? Well, I expect you use what you have, even if it's not ideal.
Now, about the current situation with Sigma - I think he definitely likes him, and is intrigued by him and his situation. We did get a little thought bubble where the guy amusedly compares him to Atsushi, and you can't tell me he doesn't care about Atsushi (listen to the onsen drama cd, or read 55 Minutes if you somehow don't believe me). But also, it's undeniable that Sigma is in a very vulnerable position of being homeless and having had no one be genuinely kind to him before. His trust is very easy to earn, and with the latest chapter, Dazai has now saved his life multiple times. There is, as always, a practical purpose he needs him for. And I have to be somewhat amused because Dazai is quite literally telling Sigma everything he ever wanted and needed to hear. It's a brilliant means of quickly endearing himself to Sigma - but I don't think that's all it is.
Look. The most honest moments we get in this series from Dazai are, interestingly for an expert manipulator, when people are at their most vulnerable. In spite of every pointlessly cruel act he inflicted on Akutagawa, his first meeting with him was open and transparent; much like the orphanage director, it seems he thought this treatment would make him strong and adaptable (he's wrong but that's not the point of this). He cuts Kyouka off in irritation and says "don't give me that" when she implies that she would fail the entrance exam. He tells Atsushi it's normal to cry after losing a father figure and to feel however you feel, even if that person caused you nothing but incredible pain and cannot be forgiven. He refuses to entertain Sigma's assumptions that Dazai sees himself as a superior being to him.
Selective honesty can also be utilized to great effect; Mori does this, and undoubtedly it serves this purpose for Dazai too. But I want to stress that I do sincerely believe this is all still honesty from him. Manipulation, or genuine?
Both. It's both.
#or to summarize: Dazai is a gemini (derogatory)#<- said as a fellow gemini (also derogatory)#the few exceptions to the always both rule are basically any of his interactions with odasaku#and the bit in sb where he tells chuuya about what activating corruption will entail#most everything else appears to have a dual reason.#to be clear: there's lots of ways to interpret dazai - but this is the approach i personally use in my analyses#so i'd love it if you guys would read my dazai analyses keeping this standpoint in mind :)#i think instead of debating 'is dazai bad' which is seriously kind of irrelevant to me#i'd love to talk a bit more about how dazai is actually quite helpful but also equally presumptuous about what will help people#we could also talk about the fine line between protectiveness and possessiveness with him too.#or about how drawn he is to kind people who value life likely because he's hoping to find answers or a vicarious experience#anything except the 'is he good or bad' debate. i don't like it. :/#bsd#bsd meta#bsd analysis#bsd dazai#storyrambles#oof i never know how things like this are going to go over.
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