#both good and bad. two sides of the same coin

[rokurookajima]

ok MASSIVE TW SUICIDE for what i’m about to say (also sorry y’all going DEEP through some parts of my blog idk it’s for therapy i’m seeing a new therapist and ofc it’s mid november so we are approaching my massive Traumaversary era and it’s her first time getting to hear about it lmao)

idk which one of you guys sent this to me (or if it’s one of the gang no longer on tumblr) but…the day after i got it was the last time i was ready to fully .. self check out lmao, the night i gave the bottle of ambien i was gonna use to my dad so i wouldn’t be able to. i don’t remember a lot about this month, so i don’t remember if i was posting EXACTLY where i was at but ….yeah y’know. much like me recently remembering that i was drawing wan in the emergency room on the Worst Night of My Life™️ (well.. beginning of that stunning 3 day period 11/17-11/19 2016) it’s just very… funny to me? in a fucked up way. idk if you’ve ever been suicidal it’s lowkey funny years down the road. THIS in particular, it’s all funny in a very endearing way. i don’t remember getting this ask (again.. don’t remember a lot from that month but what i do…sucks lol) but u know i’m soooo sure this meant a lot to me. i’m sure this had a hand in me pouring a handful of ambien back into the bottle and giving it to my dad so i couldn’t pour it out again.

this subfandom (which is honestly just A FRIEND GROUP) was actually a light in the dark so many times in those couple years (2013-2016)?? i finished high school at the end of 2014, i was terrified to leave my little private school bubble and was convinced i’d never be able to make friends in the real world. the chat showed me i literally could make friends, kept me company while i had no friends the first year of college, someone in it sent me this while i literally had one foot in the grave??? 20 year old sydney in despair….raava believed in you :’)

also i remember the other major milestone in no longer being suicidal was the announcement on december 19th 2016 that black lag00n manga coming off hiatus, and i said god DAMNIT now i have to live

DON'T GIVE UP SYDNEY!! DID WAN GIVE UP WHEN HE THOUGHT HE WAS GON DIE AND ERRYTHING WAS FUCKED??? NO!!! DID KORRA GIVE UP WHEN SHE THOUGHT RAAVA WAS DED AND SHE WAS THE LAST AVATAR?? NO!! B LIKE WAN AND KORRA!! U A BOSS AS BITCH AND U CAN SURVIVE ANYTHING!!! RAAVA WOULD BELIEVE IN U AND SO DO I!!

thank you friend :) i’m tryin

[hermitcraftx]

The problem with a lot of traffic life interpretations in my opinion is they don't understand character foils or don't employ them in their writing. Grian-Martyn and Scar-Ren are genuinely pretty good character foils for a series that is not really scripted or planned out like a book is. I could go on and on about how they parallel each other and the similarities between them. Even the smaller details between the four usually match up

leaving the rant in the tags so I don't have a huge block of text again ueueue

[spacedlexi]

people who think clem surviving makes no sense are so funny. "they were literally foreshadowing her death the entire season" let me introduce you to the concept of a red herring. she tells lilly she isnt lee and shes right. the narrative was forcing her down that path, a path she saw as an inevitable fate waiting to take her too, but its a narrative broken by aj, who is also his own person and not S1 clem

"it happened to lee, and itll happen to you" lilly tells clem she'll die protecting aj from some mistake he makes, when in reality his defiance of her will is what saves her life after she had already accepted her fate. he breaks clem free from the lee cycle and they get their relatively happy ending. good for them

[lennadanvers]

I'm so tired. So here, have Ex-husband!Eddie pt. 2

Despite what one may think, you don't treat Eddie that badly.

When he comes to pick up the kids, you have a tupper with a portion or two of last night's dinner. You say it's because you've gotten used to cooking bigger portions, and that the kids wanted him to try it. A lot of excuses to hide the fact that you're worried he's not taking care of himself. Sometimes you forget he's not a boy living in the trailer park, eating chips and canned soup everyday anymore. And it won't be Eddie the one to remind you that he can cook more than pasta and frozen pizza now.

It's one of the kid's birthay and the whole family reunites in your house. When Robin gets there and sees you- for the first time after the divorce-, she's dissapointed. Not because you're not doing as good as Eddie told her, but because you are, in fact, doing great. She's so dissapointed on Eddie for letting you go. And you're even still kind to him.

You're a good team. Especially in front of the kids. It's like, after the divorce, Eddie finally understood what you meant by "not wanting to be the boring parent all the time". Limits have allways been a concept hard for him to grasp, with a father always too busy running from the cops and Uncle Wayne spending so much time working to keep them both afloat. But he's proud to say he's learned- more like had to. Now, when it's his turn with the children, he thinks about what would you do. It's not quite the same as having a conscience, but it's worked so far. And it makes him warm inside to see you finally having fun with your kids. Since he started playing the bad cop too, you can get a taste of the other side of the coin. And he gets to hear you laugh- a sound that he hasn't been able to reproduce in his music so far; he's afraid he'll never find a way to capture it. But, well, as far as he does a good job as a dad, he'll get to listen to it.

He can't escape the limits, though. Even if your kids insist in having a sleepover with daddy after the birthday party, he'll be sleeping on the couch.

It's okay, it smells like home and he can pretend the cushion he's hugging is your waist.

[scrambleseggy]

I don’t think people realize that erasure within certain groups in queer communities directly affects peoples perceptions of the violence and abuse those people can face and why. Hypervisibility and invisibility are both two sides of the same coin. Neither is better or worse than the other, because while hypervisibility can glorify the violence a group faces and grossly sexualizes it, invisibility aims to turn the camera away from another group so that they don’t get any ideas that people like them exist in the first place — let alone face harm for their presentation and identity.

Erasure isn’t just “feeling invisible” — it’s also the general media and population purposefully trying to undermine issues certain groups can face and ignore them so those groups feel like they have no outlets or support — whether it’s from society or their own communities. It’s often because they want to avoid the idea of the very existence of those groups as well.

I don’t really think people know what erasure truly is. And I think when people try to act like “it’s not that bad” they don’t even realize how that does more harm than good and feeds right into it.

[wannaeatramyeon]

Lookism Boys - Meeting Your Parents

G/N. Headcanons on what your parents would think. Goo, Jake, Gun, Samuel, Ryuhei. Masterlists

Both are absolutely two sides of the same coin. Either way, your parents will be so charmed by Goo or Jake that they wish they were the ones dating him instead.

Goo is hilarious. In a mean bitchy way, that even though he is laughing at other people rather than with - he's laughing with your parents at other people so this slips pass their radar.

They are caught up with his quips and sharp tongue and honeyed words that they happily go along with this ride, trading numerous inside jokes by the end of the meeting, giggling together like a bunch of school children.

It helps that he's also dressed head to toe in hard to miss designer labels, and brings lavish gifts for them too. No, their affection and approval can't be bought but well, it doesn't hurt to try.

Jake is the son your parents wish they had, insult to their actual sons be damned. Or the person they wish they had met if they were twenty years younger, sexuality be damned.

And yes, Jake would pull out the cheesy lines like (gesturing to your mother) "Y/N, you didn't tell me you had a sister!" and dad jokes to your own dad. He would be so insufferably charming about it that it would inevitably work and win them over in no time at all.

Unlike Goo, so what if Jake's finances are tight right now? And his prospects are a little questionable? He clearly loves you and is a Good Guy. You two are young, he can work that out in due course.

There's a powerful aura emitting from Gun and your parents don't know what to make of it. Is it ok that you're seemingly with this dangerous man? With the unusual eyes and scar between his eyes?

This would have put their backs up more but Gun, to your surprise, is capable of showing exceptional manners. He is super respectful in their presence. Deep bows, good etiquette, and formal honorifics. They can't help but be reassured that if he is this respectful of them, then surely he will be of you.

Gun's demeanour is generally stiff and serious. He's quiet and doesn't talk much, though they don't miss the way he softens when he looks at you. Nor his patience when you revert back to being a sulky child when you're in your parent's presence too long.

They approve, mostly. But will always be a little uneasy around Gun.

At first glance, or first meeting, Samuel is clearly a guy that thinks a lot about himself. Unfortunately it shows to your parents too.

To his credit, his ego and confidence is inflated but the way he treats you is surprisingly tender. And despite the pedestal he sometimes likes to put himself on, he puts you on an even higher pedestal. Which can be both positive and negative. To your parents though, it's good that he obviously treats you well.

Sammy does turn on the charm a little, walking the thin line between flattering and smarmy - a bit like how he is with Eugene. Most of all, your parents are impressed with his prospects (something Jake, unfortunately, lacks).

Excellent career prospects, property, assets, finance. Even if he is a bit up his own ass, at least he can look after you.

Ryuhei has never ever met a partner's parent, and it shows with how tense he is. A complete surprise for you to see your happy-go-lucky puppy so anxious.

He relaxes each time you give him a small smile or squeeze his hand in a comforting gesture.

Your parents, to be honest, don't think much of him. Not to say they think he's bad for you, they just don't form much of an opinion of him during the first meeting.

The second meeting, however: 'Poor guy,' your parents think. He is wrapped around your finger and he's too head over heels to even kick up a fuss whenever you're being unreasonable or bratty.

He tries to charm them, which is a bit hit and miss but it's so so obvious how much he adores you and hangs on to your every word that even they become a bit worried about his well being and you taking advantage of him.

Not that you would... maybe.

[dalliancekay]

"I think Aziraphale needs to learn a lot more than that..."

Why do people keep (telling me again and again about this quote) assuming that Neil means Aziraphale needs some moral lessons, get off his high horse, learn some hard truths about Heaven, escape their grasp, finally understand that they are bad etc etc etc.

When the ask is about how Crowley is always forgiven from Aziraphale's point of view and how what (I see) Neil means is that Azi should also be told he's good enough. That he can be loved.

That what he needs to learn is how to believe in himself. To trust his mind, his feelings, to believe he is enough, he always was, that he doesn't have to be perfect or 100% right, that it is not possible and that it's okay. That he's okay. That he was lied to.

I wish we would frame Aziraphale's journey/learning as something else, not morality/awakening of some sort. Not as something he has to overcome. When Crowley changes his mind on something, no one says, oh have a gold star, you went against what Hell wants from you. Well done! Why do we do that to Aziraphale. Crowley is seen in Hell, giving presentations on some half hearted ideas that no one there really gets and getting accolades for things he didn't do at all and everyone is like, oh yay, look at him, so clever. Hahahah. Aziraphale also has to follow rules and do his tasks whether he agrees with them or not or he will be punished. He's not doing it for fun. He breaks rules when he feels he simply must and then everyone is like oh look, he is finally abandoning the rigid thinking that Heaven showed/taught him. But really, the naïve slow angel, he should try even harder.

Why such double standards?

Aziraphale is good and wants to do good. He is not sure of himself, true, but that's hardly his fault. Crowley is also good and tries to do good or at least limit the bad things he needs to do to survive.

They are two sides of the same coin. They both learn and grow. Sometimes the treatment the Ineffables get reminds me of how differently boys and girls are treated when they are learning behaviour. Boys praised for anything and everything even remotely good they do (cos they are expected to be naughty) and girls get the oh you should have already known better treatment. Aziraphale saved Job's kids cos he thought it was a horrible thing to want to do and expected to be punished for it. That's not - he didn't, it didn't change who he is. He did it expecting Falling. That's extremely brave. Yes Crowley has Fallen and people tend to see this as some extra superior move on his behalf, like he had everything figured out, understood how bad Heaven was and tried to bravely fix it. And Aziraphale needs to catch up with him. (If not by Falling himself than by doing some extraordinary learning journey to catch up with Crowley's knowledge). No. That's all HC. We don't even know why Crowley Fell. We don't. We know what he says happened (and we also know that he's not a reliable narrator...) and that's all we know. And even the things he says are not exactly showing him as some truth waving hero only wanting to make Heaven better for everyone and failing. Aziraphale is not breaking rules cos suddenly he used his brain and saw how Heaven is bad. He already knows that. He's risking punishment to help others. Again and again. And that's very kind and admirable and everything but it's not his evolving morality. He's already moral. He's already good. He always was.

He's also fucking cute. Let's not forget.

[inou-ie]

Pairing(s): Rahu and Shalom x female reader

Warnings: NSFW, transfem Rahu, transfem Shalom, double penetration, overstimulation, breeding, threesome, polyamory.

MDNI

Waking up with two women on either side of you, holding you tightly as if they're afraid to lose you, made you feel protected and loved. However, you couldn't deny the soreness in your body from being held tightly in that position throughout the night.

You groaned, attempting to sit up and free yourself from their grip, but it was to no avail. Rahu and Shalom held you tightly, and from the way they were embracing you, you could already discern which one aimed to protect you and which one desired to dominate you.

"Where are you going...?" Rahu opened her eyes, gently touching your cheek to turn your head and make you look at her. "Bathroom? I could come with you." she suggested before sitting up. She released her hold on you to stretch her limbs.

However, the moment Rahu let go of you, a pair of arms tightly wrapped around your waist. "What's this? Are you paying more attention to her?" you heard Shalom whisper near your ear, pulling you closer towards her body.

You couldn't help but chuckle when Rahu tried to snatch you away, only for Shalom to steal a kiss from your cheek, looking at Rahu with a teasing grin.

"You..." Rahu growled lowly, quickly kissing your cheek as well before glaring at Shalom.

"What? It's not like you couldn't do the things I did." Shalom said, her gentle smile never leaving her face.

It was an everyday occurrence. They were like a loyal and protective dog, one who wanted to keep you all to herself, and a mischievous and graceful cat, one who sought to claim you as her own.

They both knew there was nothing to fight about because you loved them both equally. Still, they couldn't help but vie for your love and affection.

The only thing they could agree on was their desire to make you feel good and happy. Even though they argue while they pleasure you, they share the same goal: to make you feel like you're on cloud nine.

One of the things you find amusing is when Rahu and Shalom make you toss a coin. If it lands on tails, then it'll be Shalom who gets to fill you up first; if it's heads, it'll be Rahu.

Their faces while they wait for you are truly adorable, filled with anticipation and excitement... completely different when they have you writhing and whimpering while they're deep inside you.

You watched them closely, their gazes following the movement of your hands as you tossed the coin in the air. The moment it landed in your hand, they moved closer to get a better look.

"It's… tails." you said, showing the coin to them. If Rahu had a tail, it would be drooping to the ground now, making her look like a puppy who had been accidentally kicked.

Shalom chuckled, wrapping her arms around your neck from behind as she looked at Rahu. "Too bad, huh?" Shalom said in a teasing tone, sticking her tongue out, which made Rahu frown. "Don't tease her too much…" you told Shalom, but she just shrugged.

"Alright, let's get you ready." Shalom is quick to remove your clothes, her hands were gentle but you could feel the desperation in her touches. While Rahu moved behind you, making you rest your back against her body while she embraces you.

Shalom started to remove her clothing, one by one, slowly... making sure to maintain eye contact with you. Your gaze quickly shifted towards her erection, and oh how big she is... makes you wonder how can such thing even fit inside of you.

"You ready?" Shalom asked, her hands gently caressing the soft flesh of your thighs before spreading them slowly to reveal your already wet cunt.

As you mumble a barely audible "...ready." she lifts your chin with her finger and commands, "Eyes on me first." Your gaze remains locked onto hers as she moves even closer, bringing her length right up against your soaking wet heat.

"Open your mouth." she whispered softly, her gentle smile guiding you into submission. Without hesitation, you obey and open your mouth wide for her as she leans closer. Her tongue swiftly darts into your mouth, causing a soft moan to escape your lips.

As Shalom's tongue slowly explores your mouth, she teases your clit with the tip of her cock. The gentle pressure against it causes your toes to curl and hips to buck in search of more contact.

The tip of her cock gently crushing your clit, Shalom's hold on you tightens. Rahu's hands find their way to your breasts, fondling them gently as she begins to bite and lick your earlobe before pushing her tongue in. The combination of sensations is almost too much for you to handle, causing your eyes to roll back in pleasure.

Shalom and Rahu's teasing leaves you trembling with anticipation. When Shalom finally pulls away, a string of saliva connects the two of you as your breathing becomes ragged. Tears form in your eyes from the overwhelming pleasure they have given you.

Shalom purred, "So adorable... we haven't even started yet." She gave you one last kiss on the lips before holding your thighs apart and keeping you still with Rahu's help. "You're already dripping wet." she said as her cockhead ran along your wet folds, causing your body to shudder in anticipation.

"Please, hurry..." you mumble, offering yourself to her completely. Shalom aligned her cock in front of your entrance and slowly began to penetrate you. The feeling of her thick length pressing against your tight pussy is almost too much for you to handle as she finally pushed all the way inside.

As you felt yourself being stretched by Shalom's cock, your back arched slightly. Rahu held onto you tighter and leaned in to place soft kisses on your neck before nibbling gently at your flesh. The pressure of Rahu's cock bulging through her pants against your back adds another layer of excitement for you.

"You're so cute..." Rahu whispered in your ear, her voice filled with anticipation. She carefully undid her pants to free her throbbing cock, which was already leaking precum. Shifting positions, she positioned herself near your face as she pleaded silently for you to take her cock deep into your mouth.

As Shalom begins to thrust inside of you in a steady rhythm, your hand reaches out and grasps Rahu's cock. The moment your skin makes contact, Rahu groans loudly and her hips buck forward. Her eyes plead with you for more as she begs for you to take her entire length into your throat.

As you open your mouth wide enough to take Rahu's cock inside, she lets out a soft groan. You begin by swirling your tongue around the head before slowly taking her entire length into your mouth before starting to suck on it eagerly.

Shalom watches intently as she speeds up her thrusts, hitting deeper and deeper inside of you with each stroke. "Pay attention to me too..." Shalom's hand squeezes your breast roughly, causing you to moan muffled sounds around Rahu's cock.

"She's taking us so well," Shalom says, looking at Rahu. "I bet she can take more." Rahu nods in agreement as her eyes never leave yours. "You know how to stop us when it gets too much for you, right?" She asks softly, a faint smile playing on her lips.

Feeling reassured by your nod, Rahu begins thrusting her hips harder into your mouth while still maintaining care not to hurt or overwhelm you. Her hand fixes your hair gently before moving down to caress the side of your face lovingly.

Meanwhile, Shalom continues to drive deep inside of you with steady rhythm, the sensation of being taken so carefully and intimately by both women is exhilarating beyond words.

The room is filled with the lewd, wet sounds of your mouth sucking on Rahu's cock and the squelching sounds of Shalom's entire length sliding in and out of your pussy. The slapping of flesh against flesh echoes through the air.

You start to tear up from the overwhelming pleasure as Rahu's cock throbs against the back of your throat, causing you to gulp down all the precum that leaks out. Shalom grabs both your arms and pulls you closer to her as she starts pounding into you.

As Shalom takes control, her hips buck wildly against yours, accelerating her thrusts deep inside of you. You can't help but let go of Rahu's cock momentarily as Shalom's cockhead presses against your cervix in every powerful stroke. Rahu notices this immediately and holds onto your head firmly while shoving her entire length back into your mouth.

Rahu's voice is full of desire and desperation as she mumbles, "Just a little more..." Her hand tightens on the back of your head to keep you in place while Shalom's cock bulges out in your stomach with every powerful thrust.

Your cries of pleasure are muffled by Rahu's cock as both women reach their climaxes at the same time, filling you with their essence. Thick ropes of cum flow down your throat from Rahu while Shalom buries her entire length deep inside of you, pressing against your cervix and filling every inch of your womb with her seed.

"You're so good..." Rahu praises as she holds onto your head tightly for a moment before releasing it slowly, allowing some air to enter your lungs after she's filled you so fully. She watches as Shalom continues thrusting her hips hard against yours, pressing her cock deeper and harder against your cervix, pushing all of her cum into every corner of your womb.

Your eyes lock onto Rahu's throbbing cock, wet with a mixture of her cum and your saliva. The urge to clean it off overtakes you as you lean forward instinctively, taking her cock back into your mouth once more. You suck on it hard enough for Rahu to let out a deep groan of pleasure.

Shalom pants heavily, her thrusts slowing down and eventually stopping completely. She remains buried deep inside of you for just a few more moments longer – savoring the feeling of being so deeply connected with you in every possible way.

Shalom smirks down at you with satisfaction, her chest still heaving from the exertion. "Good girl," she praises softly as she carefully pulls out of your pussy. "Did it feel good?"

Your pussy grips around Shalom's cock deliciously as it finally releases its hold on you, leaving behind a trail of her cum. You let go of Rahu's cock with a satisfied pop before speaking up, "It was amazing." As Rahu's cum trickles down your chin, Shalom leans in close to wipe it away softly for you.

"We're not done yet... I still have my turn to fill you up." Rahu quickly helps you sit up and then easily lifts your entire body weight onto her lap so that you're sitting down on top of her.

Your pussy rubs against Rahu's cock teasingly as it continues to throb and leak pre-cum beneath you. You lean forward slightly, offering yourself more fully to her.

Rahu's arms wrap around you tightly as she lays back slowly, holding onto your body close to her chest. "Ride me?" she asks in a pleading tone, causing you to laugh softly at her eagerness.

"Please..." Rahu adds with an endearing blush on her cheeks, her hips bucking upwards to rub her cock against your folds teasingly.

"Of course, how can I refuse you?" You lean against Rahu's shoulder for support as she holds her cock still, allowing you to sink down onto it slowly. Her low growl of pleasure fills the room when your wet pussy easily surrounds and engulfs her thick length.

Rahu's hands reach up towards yours, interlocking your fingers tightly together. Her hips buck upwards slightly in response to the sensation, urging you deeper onto her cock with each thrust. You feel yourself opening up more fully around her girth, welcoming every inch of her into your core as if it were made specifically for her.

As you lose yourself in the pleasure of riding Rahu's cock, a pair of hands snake around your waist from behind. Shalom whispers into your ear, "Aren't you forgetting about me?" She gently pushes on you, making you bend down slightly so that your breasts are pressing against Rahu's chest and your ass is now presented to her temptingly.

"Can you take us both?" Shalom asks with a teasing grin as she begins caressing your ass gently, sending shivers of anticipation through your body. Her fingers trail up and down your crack, spreading your cheeks open wider for her inspection. You feel her hot breath against your sensitive skin before you suddenly feel something blunt and hard pressing against your entrance from behind.

"Shalom, wai– ah..nggh!" Your eyes go wide with surprise at the sudden intrusion as Shalom slowly starts pushing her own cock inside of you from behind – stretching you out further than ever before.

You can't see Shalom's face, but you just know she must be grinning widely down at the sight of both her and Rahu taking turns filling your body completely.

Rahu holds onto you tightly against her chest, not letting go even as she thrusts powerfully inside of you in perfect sync with Shalom behind you. Her cock hits all the right spots inside of you, sending waves upon waves of pleasure coursing through every nerve ending in your body. As for Shalom, each thick inch that disappears into your ass is met with a moan from deep within her throat.

Your pussy grips around Rahu's cock tightly while your ass clenches greedily onto Shalom's invading length. It feels like being filled up by two impossibly large and hard members at once.

As Rahu continues to thrust into your pussy, her breathing becomes more labored and she lets out a deep moan of pleasure. "So good," she mutters between ragged gasps for air. "So tight..."

Meanwhile, Shalom's cock inside you feels like it's hitting every single one of your sensitive nerves as she takes advantage of the position to grind against your ass cheeks with each powerful thrust. Her free hand finds its way down to play with your clit, sending shockwaves of pleasure straight from your core to every inch of your body.

As Rahu continues to thrust into your pussy with all her might, her tongue circles around your nipple before she finally takes it into her mouth, sucking on it with such intensity that you feel like you might float away from the sensation. Your entire body feels like it's melting under their combined assault.

You don't know how much longer you can hold out as Rahu continues to thrust powerfully inside of you while Shalom pistons in and out of your ass, claiming every last bit of your attention for themselves.

Your voice is barely a whisper as you find yourself on the brink of orgasm. "Too much..." you murmur hoarsely, your soft whimpers filling the room now that your loud moans have subsided.

Rahu's tongue flicks against one of your nipples while Shalom pinches and rolls your clit between her fingers – each touch sending shivers down your spine. Their pace doesn't slow even for a moment.

Shalom's voice is hushed, almost a murmur against your skin. "Shh... you can take it." Her thrusts grow deeper and harder as she matches Rahu's pace, pushing both of you closer to the edge.

And then finally – with one last powerful push from behind – Shalom finds her own release inside of you while Rahu follows suit moments later. Their combined moans fill the room as their hot seed spills into and around your body in a thick, sticky mess.

Your body feels completely filled to the brim with their combined weight and presence as Shalom pins you between her own body and Rahu's. You can feel every inch of them against your skin, from their chests pressed against yours all the way down to where they're still buried deep inside of you.

Just as you thought they were done, Rahu held your head still with one hand, burying it in the crook of her neck while the other kept you pressed against her body. Shalom, on the other hand, kept her hands around your hips. It felt overwhelmingly good when they resumed their pounding into your holes.

This time, their movements became more intense. Losing themselves as they started slamming their hips in ecstasy as they enjoy the sounds of your moans and cries. It's as if they were racing towards their climax using your holes, yet you still found yourself enjoying every moment of it.

Your body unconsciously tries to get away from the overwhelming pleasure, but Rahu and Shalom hold onto you tightly. They continue pounding into you like two animals in heat as their loud groans and your moans fill the room.

You grit your teeth, trying your best to keep up with them both. Every inch of you is stretched taut around their cocks; it feels like being taken by a pair of wild beasts whose only goal is to claim you completely for themselves.

"Fuck..." your voice trembles along with your body as you let out a hoarse cry, overwhelmed by the intense sensations coursing through every inch of you. You can barely form the word as Rahu's cock pulverizes your womb again and again – filling it up to bursting point with her thick seed while Shalom's invading length continues to stretch and fill your ass greedily from behind.

Shalom leans back slightly to get a better view of your body trembling and shaking as you lie flatly on Rahu's chest, unable to move an inch anymore. Rahu stares down at your fucked out face with an expression that mixes tenderness with pride.

"How cute..." Rahu murmurs softly before adding with a laugh, "If you keep being this adorable, we'll just keep going for the whole day and night if that's what it takes."

At the mention of more pleasure, Shalom quickly interjects, "That's exactly what she wants. Let's give it to her." She grabs a handful of your hair, pulling your head back so that both women can see clearly into your eyes – searching for any sign of discomfort or pain. But there is none; instead all they find reflected back at them is your satisfied expression, eyes asking for more.

As Shalom lets go of your hair, you collapse back onto Rahu's chest with a contented sigh. Rahu quickly pat your head lovingly before leaning down to place a soft kiss against it – as if she hadn't just filled every inch of your womb with her cum.

"There, there..." Rahu murmurs soothingly. "We'll give you more... much more." She promises, her voice full of unwavering commitment towards satisfying all of your desires.

While Shalom planted soft kisses against your back, you could still feel their cocks throbbing inside of you – a reminder that neither woman intends to stop anytime soon but you could tell they're holding back to give you comfort from how roughly they treated you earlier.

"How about I join Rahu inside this tight little hole of yours?" Shalom's sudden suggestion echoes in the room as she slowly pulls out of your ass, leaving it gaping and leaking her cum steadily. Her eyes then drift down to observe how tightly your pussy grips onto Rahu's throbbing cock.

Rahu's voice holds a note of concern as she shakes her head slightly, replying to Shalom's suggestion. "I don't think she can handle that..." Despite her words, you felt Rahu's cock twitch inside you. You knew how much she wants to try it as well.

Shalom grabbed your hair once again. As she pulls back your head, her other hand rubbing soothingly against the side of your face. "I'm not asking you, Rahu..." She starts off teasingly before adding with a sultry chuckle, "I'm asking our beautiful girl right here... So, want to try? Don't you want to feel us both inside your tight little pussy?" Her words send shivers down your spine and between your legs.

Shalom's eyes light up with anticipation at your nod of consent, her own smile widening into something predatory yet somehow endearing all at once. "Good girl..." She coos softly against your ear.

With that, they both promised to be gentle with you... but the moment they felt how tight you were around them, they immediately went wild. Slamming their cocks into you alternately, making you scream and cry out in pleasure as they took turns hitting your cervix. You were so stuffed full of them that all you could do was pant for air while drooling from the sheer ecstasy of it all.

"...more... so good..." you whispered, your voice carrying the passion and desire in it. They fucked you for hours on end, only changing positions when Rahu picked you up in her strong arms while they continued thrusting into you deeply. All thoughts were driven from your mind as you sobbed in pleasure, your head resting on Rahu's shoulder, biting her hard when it gets too overwhelming. Despite their ferocity, they made sure to comfort you with praises and soft kisses throughout, making you feel exhausted yet satisfied.

[invisibleanonymousmonsters]

chapter xxvi – gust & flame

Eris Vanserra x Reader

Eris Vanserra has been a prisoner in his own home since the day he was born. He has done what he had to in order to survive and protect the few he loves. And he is playing the long game. Waiting, waiting, and waiting for the right time to make his move, to usurp his wicked father and become High Lord of Autumn Court. But things become even more complicated when a human girl drops into his life. Perhaps Eris can wait no longer to take his throne.

Word Count:  5,100+

warning: sex scene [even bigger warning: the first one i've ever written, so it'll probably be very bad 😂]

masterlist

“If we continue paying the farmers this way, it will have consequences on the court’s treasury!" The Master of Coin droned on to the rest of the advisors and Eris. 

“Abbán, you have been poisoned by the same greed of the late High Lord Beron,” defended General Domnhall. 

He was Eris’ most loyal warrior when he controlled Autumn Court's armies. And once Eris became High Lord, there was no one else he trusted more to take his place as General than him. The male was yet another that, had it had been safe enough, Eris would've considered Domnhall a friend. 

General Domnhall had been away from the Forest House since Eris had usurped the throne, in order to protect the Court and assure Eris’ reign was not overtaken or challenged, while also monitoring the borders of Autumn Court. 

Eris tried to suppress his smirk at his friend’s defensiveness. 

“And what of the funds we gained from trading in human flesh?” Domnhall added darkly. 

Eris finally leaned forward, forearms pressing into the oak table. “Do not take me as a fool, Abbán. My father’s greed was always framed as responsible and for the good of the Court. But we all know neither were true. He kept as much as could, so our people were desperate and worked harder for nearly nothing. He did it to control them.” 

“They are your subservients!” Abbán’s voice raised. 

Eris shot to his feet. “There are my Court!”

From the outburst, his entire body was engulfed in flames that threatened the room, but remained in control at his side. 

Everyone at the table tensed. 

“A High Lord is meant to bring his Court to glory, not to keep his inhabitants weak and scared of his power,” Eris continued evenly. “You and I both know there is plenty of coin, Abbán. Rid yourself of the illness that is greed, or I will find a Master of Coin who can.” 

Abbán swallowed nervously. 

But Eris continued. “In the past, we have relied too heavily on the interest of other Courts to purchase our goods. We shall start trading to the Mortal Realm and to the fae of Spring Court.” 

There was instantly murmuring amongst the table. 

“But High Lord Tamlin could see this as an attempt to take his Court,” one said. 

Eris scoffed. “Tamlin cannot even manage his own manor. Do you honestly think he’s paying any attention to the goods being imported through his borders? Lucien will manage the shipments. They trust him. And if their High Lord will not assure his inhabitants are being fed, then I will.” 

Abbán knew better than to argue. So, he bowed his head and replied, “Yes, High Lord.” 

“We have been at council since dawn, High Lord.” Another spoke gently. “Perhaps that is enough for today…”

“Yes,” Eris agreed in a growl. “It is.” He waved his hand lazily. “You are dismissed.” 

He slumped back into his chair, waiting for the others to leave. 

Domnhall was the only one that stayed behind, patiently waiting to be left alone with the High Lord.

Eris pretended to not notice. 

There was a moment of tense silence shard between the two males. 

“Shall I kill him?” Domnhall asked cheerfully. 

Eris rolled his eyes. “If I wanted him dead, I could do it myself.”

Domnhall stood and moved closer to his High Lord, hovering about his seat at the council table. “Yes, I am well aware.” 

Eris sighed and crossed his arms. “Is there something you needed, Domnhall?”

The general smirked at him. “Get rid of the ol’ git. He is useless. His greed makes him unfit for the role. It is smart a smart move to bring food to Spring Court. They are suffering. And perhaps your charity could bring more to Autumn Court.” 

Eris nodded slowly. “How is my army?”

“They are my army now,” Domnhall teased. “And they are well. Some are weary about the civil unrest. None wish to fight against their own, some of which are their families and friends. But they remain loyal to you, Eris – as always.” 

During Beron's reign, the army would have followed Eris through anything. They were loyal to him, not Beron. They trusted him, believed in him. But Eris would never have risked their lives to an outright war against his father.

Eris rubbed his face, clearly deep in his head.

“Now, where is that mate of yours?” Domnhall asked with a smile, looking around playfully as if she would appear at any moment. “You have hid her from me for months now. All I know of her are the rumors that spread through the Court.”

Eris cocked his eyebrow at him. “With your history, do you really think I would let you anywhere near her?” 

Domnhall only chuckled. He was not shy about his love for females, especially ones who were...unsatisfied with their husbands.

All teasing disappeared as Eris’ gaze darkened. “She wishes to return to the mortal realm. To Y/N, her place is not here, but amongst the humans.”

Domnhall’s smile dropped. “But you are mates…”

“Yes, and that holds little meaning to mortals. She does not see it as we do. She cannot feel the bond.”

“But she is not just a mortal,” Domnhall argued. “She is a witch!”

“If she wishes to leave, who am I to stop her?” Eris finally snapped. “Shall I chain her to the Forest House, hold her captive, make her no more than a prisoner?” He rubbed his face. “It wouldn’t be the first time a High Lord imprisoned a woman in such a manner…”

“Do not compare yourself to Tamlin,” Domnhall spat with disgust. “You keep her here to insure her safety. The mortal realm is unstable as it is – and if anyone found out who she was, she would be endangered. I know your actions are noble, Eris. Your father is no longer here to force your false character. And I know the male you truly are.” 

Eris stood, his hands pressing down into the table. “Thank you, Domnhall, for your…loyalty and…”

“Friendship?” The general offered with an amused smirk. 

He too now stood. “One day, I hope you can undo your conditioning and actually call me your friend.”

Domnhall started to leave, but paused at the doorway. “And in case you didn’t know, friends usually introduce each other to their mates.”

He winked and disappeared. 

—🍁—

Eris needed to see her. His body started to ache when he was away from her for too long. And once she had moved into the Forest House, the aches only grew stronger.

All the talk of her from Domnhall only made him realize the council had been distracting him from the feeling.

And he could ignore it no longer.

Y/N had healed him after the battle, after he had used his beast form for the first time since becoming High Lord. 

It had been almost two weeks, since Y/N had healed him after the battle, after he had used his beast form for the first time since becoming High Lord. 

And Eris had barely had time to see her since. 

Now, he searched for her in the surrounding forest of the manor. It was all enclosed and protected by countless spells of his own magic.

She should not be in any danger here. But it still left him uneasy for her safety. 

The trees were getting thicker and he tried to pull on the string that tied him to her. He'd heard of mates calling to each other, yanking at the tie between their hearts and souls.

But Y/N was not fae – even worse, she had not accepted the bond yet. 

Instead, Eris came across one of his guards that he had assigned to watch over Y/N. 

He bowed immediately. “She is safe, High Lord. Lady Y/N wished for space, I have the guards surrounding her, but keeping out of her sight.”

Eris nodded in thanks. “You and the rest of the guard are relieved of your duties for the day. Thank you for watching over her.” 

The guard bowed again, but hesitated before he soflty added, “She was helping the injured all morning, High Lord. Then she immediately went to the archives for hours. I believe she needs some rest.” 

Eris gripped the guards shoulder in thanks. A gesture he would’ve never even thought of doing when Beron was still alive and ruling. 

He walked forward until there was a break in the trees. The small patch of hilly grass allowed the light of the setting sun to slip through. 

In the middle of the clearing was a giant oak tree, its trunk over five feet wide. 

And beneath it was his mate, fast asleep on top of a thick blanket. But not alone, for his smoke hounds were an extra layer of protection on top of the guard he assigned to watch over her.

She was wearing a blood red dress made of both velvet and sheer fabric. Even when laying on the grass asleep, she looked utterly beautiful. Her lips were covered in a stain that perfectly matched the color of her dress, and Eris could only assume one of her servants had insisted on the detail. 

Eris swore he did not pay the Court’s seamstresses enough for how perfectly they tailored all of Y/N’s clothes. 

Per usual, her feet were bare. But somehow hardly dirty for having trounced through the woods. 

As soon as Eris took a step into the clearing, all 12 of his smoke hounds – who had been cuddly and guarding Y/N – shot up and growled a warning to him. 

Eris whistled lowly, his signal for them to relax, one of many that he had trained into them since they were puppies.

Their growling immediately ceased and a couple even trotted over to give their master a greeting. 

The only threat now: Ronan. Y/N’s pet fox, who was not his nor trained by him.

Ronan still growled in warning at Eris, standing protectively at Y/N’s feed as she slept.

Eris chuckled at Ronan, still a kit and not a full-grown fox yet. 

Ronan let out a bark when Eris was only a few feet away, and it finally stirred Y/N. 

“You woke her, you overprotective runt,” Eris hissed his scold to the fox. 

Y/N blinked and reached for her knife. But as soon as her gaze found Eris, her entire body relaxed. 

“I apologize for waking you,” Eris quickly told her, hovering where he stood, unsure if he should invade her space or leave. 

Y/N gave him a shy grin and then reached out a hand, silently signaling him to join her on the blanket. 

Ronan gave another warning growl. 

“Hush, Ronan,” Y/N chided, as she picked the fox kit up and moved him on the other side of her, away from Eris. "You know he means no harm.” 

Ever so gracefully, Eris walked through the pack of protective smoke hounds and carefully sat on the blanket beside Y/N, his back resting against the trunk of the oak tree. 

To his surprise, Y/N scooted closer instantly, resting her head against his chest. 

Eris tried to control his heart rate as his mate’s ear lingered right over it. One would think he was some pubescent fae youngling with the way his body reacted to such an innocent gesture. It would be more embarrassing if he was not getting such a thrill from this innocent intimacy. 

“What are you doing out here, little witch?” He asked her as he brushed hair behind her ear and off her neck, so he could clearly look down at her face. 

Y/N sighed, “I needed some air.”

“Ahh…and what gossip did the wind tell you today?”

Y/N smirked “Nyx took his first steps today. Rhysand cried more about it than Feyre did.”

“What a sentimental fool,” Eris snarked back. 

“Do not be rude!” She snapped back with a smile, and pinched his thigh in warning. 

As if laughing with them, a small fist of wind flurried around them. 

Eris looked down at Y/N. Really she should be wearing a cloak or have another blanket. 

Quickly, he slightly jostled her to remove his own cloak, the collar lined with fur. 

He wrapped it over Y/N gently. 

She smiled. “You didn’t need to do that. What if you get cold?”

Eris rolled his eyes. “Tis only fashion. I am the High Lord of Autumn, a wielder of flame. My blood runs hot and I am almost never cold.”

To prove it further, he held out the hand that wasn’t holding his mate, and lit a fireball in his palm. Then released it into the air. It remained floating around them and Y/N immediately felt its warmth, as if they were sitting near a bonfire. 

Y/N cuddled even further into his chest.

She looked up at the trees around them, forever in a state of orange, red, and yellow.

“In the mortal realm, I would wait all year for autumn. I dreamt of the leaves changing all summer. I always yearned for the chill air, the cloudy skies, the rainy days. Summer weighs me down. I hate the heat and the humidity, the sun is overbearing.”

Y/N hesitated before she continued. “When I first entered Autumn, it felt like a cruel joke, being dragged into the most beautiful place I’d ever seen, while bound and enslaved.”

Eris’ body tensed in rage. The ball of fire sparked from his emotions. 

There were some days when he wished he could bring his father back, only to torture him for what he did to Y/N, and the mortal women and childcare. 

But when Eris managed to stifle his anger, he looked down at Y/N, she had already fallen back asleep. 

He whispered to the wind, “It is because you were meant for this place, my mate.” 

Then he leaned down to kiss her brow. 

The wind brushed through again, as if it agree with his statement. 

Suddenly, all he wanted was to join his mate in her peaceful sleep. 

Eris whistled to his dogs. Their ears perked up and they all looked to him, waiting for the command. 

“Stand guard,” he ordered. 

They all scattered, taking on positions in a radius and sitting stiff with watchful eyes to the surrounding forest. 

But to Eris’ amusement, Ronan trotted to the edge of the blanket and joined in the reconnaissance and as the last line of defense. 

Perhaps Ronan did take orders from him…when it involved his mate’s safety. 

—🍁—

Eris awoke almost 2 hours later. 

His recent distance from Y/N had made sleeping difficult. And as soon as he had her in his arms, his body relaxed and the exhaustion caught up with him. 

Loyal and obedient, his smoke hounds were pacing around them, guarding and surveying the area for any potential threats. 

Eris looked down to see that Y/N was still peacefully asleep on his chest. 

She needed to eat, and rest in a proper bed. 

He whistled again and the smoke hounds sprinted toward him, then sat in a line, awaiting their masters next order. 

“With me, back to the Forest House.”

The half the smoke hounds sprinted ahead, while the other half surrounded Eris.

Ronan stayed at Y/N's side.

As carefully as he could, Eris gathered Y/N in his arms. And with a wave of his hand, the blanket disappeared and would arrive in the wash house. 

Y/N’s head naturally fell to his shoulder. 

Eris walked slowly back to the Forest House, worried that winnowing would wake her.

As soon as they reached the grand hall, a servant paused her work and bowed at their arrival. 

“Ready a meal for two and bring it to my bedchambers, please.” Eris ordered. 

When they reached his room, Eris gently placed Y/N on his bed. 

“Little witch, you must wake soon and eat something.”

She whined at her slumber being interrupted. 

“When was the last time you ate?” He asked her with a narrowed gaze. 

She shied away at the question, and was smart enough to look a little guilty. For if the tables were turned, it would also upset her to see the High Lord skipping meals and working himself into utter exhaustion.

“That is what I thought,” Eris answered for her. 

It only took a few minutes for someone to bring up a meal for them.

It was a sweet looking fae who looked quite young. But Y/N had quickly learned that looks could be deceiving when it came to predicting the age of fae. 

Much to Y/N’s dismay, the servant practically carted in a feast for just the two of them. 

Eris stood, moving to the cart. “Thank you…” There was an awkward pause. “…Delyth.”

The servant blushed at the High Lord using her first name. 

“O-O-Of course, High Lord.” The poor thing stuttered out with a bow. 

Eris had been making an effort to address the staff with more kindness and acknowledgment. It was hard to adjust from the way Beron had rule this house. Which was why it was sounded so unfortunately awkward for Eris to address the servant by name. 

Feeling a bit braver now, the servant turned a bit to address Y/N directly with a shy smile. “The cooks made sure to include a few apple tarts. The bakers said they have quickly become one of your favorites.”

Y/N beamed at the kindness. “They are! Thank you so very much, Delyth. And please tell everyone in the kitchen thank you, as well.” She gave some side eye to Eris. “From both of us,” she added. 

Delyth rushed out with a final bow. 

Y/N joined Eris at the cart of food. Now that she was smelling and seeing it, her stomach growled and she finally acknowledged how hungry she was. 

“The servants seem less scared of you these days,” Y/N pointed out with amusement as she lifted lids off various sides. 

“That is less scared?” Eris cocked a brow. 

Y/N sighed and turned to face him fully. “Give it time, Eris. You have only been High Lord of Autumn for – how long? – 4 months?”

He just hummed. 

She continued. “You have been alive for centuries. Surely you do not expect to undo your previous reputation in mere days?” 

Eris was already filling a plate with a little bit of everything they had been given. “Well, certainly I should take notes from you. My Court adores you.” He smirked. “If the apple tarts were not obvious enough.”

He handed it to her, making Y/N realize he had been making a plate for her before himself.

She took it carefully, trying to ignore the sweet gesture. 

“Eat,” he urged, the High Lord in him clearly heard. 

“Yes, yes.” She rolled her eyes. “I’m eating. I’m eating.” 

Y/N moved to sit on the floor next to the giant fireplace in his bedchambers. Before she had even fully sat down, Eris had started a fire with a simple nod of his head. Then giant floor cushions – blood red, velvet, and tufted – appeared next to her. 

“I like sitting on the floor,” she muttered to herself, but fully knowing he could hear. 

“Well, I do not,” Eris retorted as he joined her on his own cushion. 

“Ah, right. We were just talking about how you are centuries old. It probably isn’t comfortably for your poor back…”

Eris paused the stabbing of his food with his fork at such a comment. 

But when he looked up, Y/N was trying not to laugh. 

“What!?” She finally giggled. “I find it hard to believe anyone ever had the courage to tease you. Perhaps it will build character!” 

“No one teased me because if they did… they were fried to ash and soot.” 

“By Beron?” She mocked. 

“By me.” 

But his glare could no longer be ignored. 

“Fine. I will stop,” Y/N surrendered. 

They continued their meal with comfortable conversation. Mostly of Eris asking about her day, and the days before when he could not see her. He asked her about the mortals, how they were faring, if the children needed anything. 

In return, Eris told her about all the meetings with his council. He even admitted how much he struggled with not lashing out at those who seemed resolute on disagreeing with his every decision and philosophy. 

“You may rid yourself of them, you know…” Y/N hummed. 

She now lounged on her side across the floor cushion, head propped up on her elbow as she gazed up at his straight posture. 

Y/N added, “There is a middle ground between complete submission and murdering any who disagree with you.” 

“And what is that, little witch?” He asked, almost bitingly.

“You could dismiss them from their position, remove them from the High Lord’s council.”

“And let them live?” Eris challenged with disgust in his tone. “So they could leave my court, and join the rebellion and challenge me?” 

Y/N sat up and moved closer, matching his sitting position. “Yes, let them live! So your people see that you are not a tyrant, but a just High Lord with honor and benevolence. And you leave an opening for others to gain standing with you, showcasing their honor, taking any opportunity to help you and help their court. True acts of service – not titles won through deceit and greed.”

Eris stared at her in awe. 

His witch spoke like a vizier, whispering council into a mortal king’s ear. But she was not doing it for any benefit other than his own. She only wished to help him. 

“I see your time in our libraries has taught you a thing or two,” he whispered to her. 

Y/N's face warmed and she looked away from his studying gaze. “I only wished to understand the ways of the fae and of Autumn Court.”

“Yes, and you learned much more than that, too.”

Eris reached out then, his fingers brushing gently against her cheek, lifting her chin so she was forced to look at him. His touch was like a spark— familiar and foreign still.

Without another word, he leaned in, his lips brushing hers, a kiss that was both a promise and a plea. Their politics and council seemed to vanish in that moment—the weight of their bond, the burden of their destinies, all faded into the background, until there was nothing left but the beat of their hearts and the shared warmth of their embrace.

This was not their first kiss, but it was the most daring of them all. 

There was a new energy, one that had been tapping at her shoulder for too long. And she feared she could no longer ignore it. 

When they pulled apart, Y/N’s breath was shaky, her pulse racing.

Eris’ hand slid down her spine, pulling her flush against him. His hands roamed over her body, exploring every curve and contour. 

He pulled away to look at her face, reading every tiny expression to see if she wanted him to stop. Because he knew his mate to be bashful, and she would not stop him until she was too scared. 

Thus, he was surprised to see such hunger and desire in her y/e/c eyes. 

Eris pulled up the skirt of her velvet dress, then undid the delicate buttons at the back of the dress, letting it fall from her torso to reveal a sheer lace body suit as her lingerie.

His fingers traced the lace, teasing her skin through the farbic, until Y/N arched into his touch, a soft moan escaping her lips.

"You are beautiful," he murmured against her mouth, his breath hot on her skin. “I fathom any males who have had the pleasure of seeing you this way were undeserving.”

Y/N's hands were not idle either. She ran her fingers through his thick, flame hair, pulling him closer and deepening the kiss. Her nails scraped lightly down his back, eliciting a shudder from him. Eris groaned, his desire for her growing with every touch.

Eris lowered his head, his lips moving down her neck and across her chest.

Y/N arched her back, her hands gripping his shoulders, as waves of pleasure rippled through her.

"Eris," she gasped, her voice hoarse with desire. 

She was not a stranger to sex. But it had left her so disappointed in the past, that her body had declared a complete disinterest in exploring it further with men, moving forward in life with an utter lack of desire. 

But Y/N did not know that Eris had put those pieces together, from Feyre’s subtle warning to him after Y/N had shared such a depressing sexual past to her friends. 

It brought him a strange rage that men had disappointed her so thoroughly. But that was quickly replaced with the primal urge to show her what she could have from him. 

So, Eris obliged, lavishing attention on his mate, his hands roaming lower, caressing the curve of her waist and the swell of her hips. 

Y/N's breath quickened as his fingers dipped underneath the skirt of her dress, tracing the lace edge of her body suit.

Pride swelled through Eris as his hand moved to instantly find her arousal. 

“Let me, Y/N. Please. I beg you," he whispered, his voice thick with desire. 

Y/N's eyes fluttered open, and she gazed up at him, her expression a mix of desire – and, surprisingly, trust. 

Eris smiled, a predatory grin, and gently pushed her back onto the cushion, following her down, his body covering hers. He kissed her deeply, hungrily, his hands roaming freely over her body, exploring every inch of her soft skin.

His fingers traced the line of her thigh, pushing her skirt higher and out of the way, fully revealing the delicate lace that covered her core.

Y/N's breath hitched as his fingers brushed against her over the fabric, and she arched her hips, seeking more contact.

He finally took pity on her and moved the fabric to the side.

Eris's eyes darkened with desire as he took in the sight of her exposed sex. 

With that, he dipped his middle finger into her, slowly, teasingly, remembering that she was a mortal – and one has lived without being deservedly worshipped by a male.  

Y/N gasped, her body jerking at the sudden intrusion. The sensation of his finger sliding into her was exquisite.

His finger moved in a slow, deliberate rhythm, gently stretching her, filling her with a pleasurable ache. He added a second finger, causing Y/N to moan softly, her head tossing back. And she clenched around his fingers, her body welcoming the touch in a way it never had before. It was a reminder than fae males were bigger than men in every way – including their fingers.

“Breathe, Y/N.” Eris encouraged with equal parts dominance and tenderness. “I can feel you holding back. Relax, my little witch.”

His voice alone sent a tremor through her body and it listened to his command as if he were her master. 

He began to move his hand in a steady, rhythmic motion, his fingers curling and inside her, hitting a spot within her that she had never felt before. 

Y/N gasped as pleasure coursed through her body. 

She could feel her orgasm building, a feeling she had never experienced when sharing a bed with the few males in her past. Delicious tension coiled in her core.

"Eris..." she could barely whisper, pleading with him against her own control.

Eris grinned, knowing he had her exactly where he wanted her. He increased the pace, his fingers working her with relentless precision.

But he was not another fumbling, mortal male. He was high fae, a powerful high lord – with Autumn fire in his blood. And he could give her more than just his fingers. 

His magic flickered out of him, controlled and careful. He could not give her too much or she might never recover. She may be a witch, but she had a fragile mortal body still. 

An invisible flame under his control spread across her skin, like a hundred warm hands were touching her, overwhelming her senses. Her skin was hot from the magic and beads of sweat started to form. 

She couldn’t handle it any longer. 

Y/N’s hips bucked off the floor, her hands trying to grip onto something as she surrendered to the sensations.

But Eris took both of her hands in one and locked them above her head, keeping her his prey.

“Let go, Y/N.“ Eris encouraged, his thumb finding her clit and circling it gently.

His words were like magic too, and Y/N’s body exploded in pleasure. 

She cried out, her back still arching as wave after wave of orgasmic bliss. Every window flew open by a gust raging into the room. Not the messengers, but her own witchcraft. As if it was her body’s subconscious response, desperate for relief from the stimulation. 

“Good girl,” Eris whispered as his magic wouldn’t let her calm down, overstimulating her. His fingers continued their assault, pushing her orgasm further, drawing out every last bit of the pleasure she deserved.

As the tremors subsided, Y/N lay panting with closed eyes, her hair fanned out on the wood floor like a halo. Her body spent, recovering from something she’d never felt before. 

But Eris comforted her, reminding her of his presence by caressing her skin and kissing up her torso and focusing on her neck. 

He kept her arms above her head, worried she would try to use them to hide herself from him.

After a few minutes, Y/N opened her eyes to find Eris still nuzzling her neck. 

As if sensing her clarity coming back, Eris finally released her and pulled back to give her a stern look. “You are not allowed to be embarrassed—understand?”

The dominance in his voice forced a quick nod from her. 

Eris had always had an imposing energy as High Lord. But it had never been directed at Y/N like this, and it was making her body tremble.

Y/N had never been given a chance to openly express her sexuality, and the intensity of her reaction caught her off guard.

In his presence, she was able to let go and give him control over her body and mind. 

But Y/N’s whole body only grew warmer – and not by the hand of Eris’ sex magic. Was that even what it had been? Her mind was fuzzy. 

Before Eris could say another word, she scrambled onto her feet. At least she had the decency of lingerie still being on her body. But she abandoned the dress Eris had so easily removed, the dozens of buttons would now betray her in this moment. 

Instead, she lunged for the Eris’ cloak that he had draped over her in the forest earlier and wrapped it around her shoulders, hiding her undergarments. 

Her heart was pounding, and she felt a rush of emotions—pleasure, confusion, and a strange sense of vulnerability.

"I... I shouldn’t… we can’t,” she stammered, eyes darting around the room at everything, but him.

Before Eris could respond, she rushed out of his bedchambers.

He knew her avoidance would win in the end. But Eris was a patient male. One does not live for centuries, planning their tyrant father’s usurping without great persistence and humility. 

So he would let her hide…for now. 

Eris had been tiptoeing around Y/N, submitting to her fear and need of distance. He let Y/N control their relationship with her withholding and protective isolation. 

But he now understood: Y/N needed to be chased, needed to be exposed to her greatest fears just so he could show her he would not let her get hurt.

But now she had proven to him that she could handle his passion, his desire. He just had to take it, with the unbroken promise of keeping her safe through it. 

Eris fell back to the floor and stared up at the high ceilings of his bedchamber. 

Y/N had left him alone with the lingering scent of her passion. It filled his bedchambers and it wouldn't dampen for days.

Eris smiled, knowing what he had to do now.

Y/N needed to be conquered.

-------------------------

I know people never read these author notes. But I have two things:

a) if you've been following my work for awhile, you know that this is the first sex scene I have ever written. I usually just skip sex scenes and heavily imply them with a fade-to-black strategy. So, if you liked it: please, please, please let me know. I really don't know if I pulled it off.

b) thank you so much for being patient with me. work has cause me to have multiple mental breakdowns, panic attacks so bad that I have to call out sick from work. I have been busy applying to jobs, while also dealing with the high demands of my current job. so i simply have not had the mental motivation to produce art, instead only finding the energy to consume it.

if you liked this chapter, please write a book report for me. it will bring me joy. 🥹🧡

[footballfanficwriter]

Dinner with the Bellinghams

Summary:After being in Madrid for a long time, Denise has invited Jude,reader and their kids for Dinner

"Are you happy to be home?" I ask Jude

"Yeah, It's been such a long time"

We're in England, after not being here for such a long time and it's been some  time since the kids have seen their grandparents

"I'm so excited to taste nan's Chicken Roast, it's been such a long time" Alice says

"Or her creamy mashed potatoes" Alicia replies

I turn to Jude and he smiles at me

"Are we there yet?" they both ask

"That's the tenth time you've both asked that" Jude replies

A sigh is heard from behind the both of us

"We're almost there" I reply

we finally arrive and decide to park In the driveway

The minute the car stops Alice attempts to open the door, but stops remembering that it's child locked

"Dad can you please open the door"

"Yeah, yeah I'm coming"

I make my way out the car and walk to Alicia's side and open the door as Jude does the Same for Alice

The minute the doors open the girls race eachother to the front door and wait patiently for the Jude and I too arrive

Jude knocks on the door and after a minute the door opens to reveal Mark

"GRANDAD" the girls scream and tackling his legs

"My gosh look who it is, you've both grown so much, you lot are gonna be as tall as me one day"

The girls giggle and Jude and I step forward to hug Mark, Jude being the first amongst the two of us

"Hi dad, how are you" Jude says as he steps forward for a hug

"I'm good, just happy you guys are here" Mark replies pulling away from the hug and turning towards me

I step forward for a hug

"You've always been my favourite, between you and Jude" he whispers into my ear

I laugh at his comment

"How are you?" I ask

"Good, you know how it is here, a mad house"

"I'm sure it can't be that bad"

He releases a slight chuckle

"You're about to witness it first hand"

I give him a confused look but don't get to ask what he means

"Alright, come in everybody" Mark says and picks the girls up each resting on one arm and we follow behind

"Grandad, do the Magic trick" Alicia says

"What magic trick?"

"The one you always do, c'mon"

He places the girls down and squats to their level

"Alright", he reaches behind Alice's ear and pulls out a sweet(candy)

"Have you been cleaning your ears lately? He asks her

Alice giggles

"Do me next grandad" Alicia says

"Alright"

He reaches behind her ear and pulls out a coin

"My Gosh, I'm quiet certain that you lot have not been cleaning you ears lately"

Both girls giggle and Denise comes down the stairs

"Are those my favourite girls I hear?"

"NANA"

"Hello my Darlings, My goodness you both have grown so much"

"That's what grandad said"

"Well he was right look at you"

I walk towards her and come in for a hug

"Hi Mom, you alright?"

"Yeah, great, you still need to tell me about you know what"

"Oh yeah, I'll tell you much later"

"Ok"

I step away  and Jude steps forward and greets her

After the greetings, Alicia asks a question

"Did you make your chicken roast" Alicia asked

"And your creamy Mashed potatoes?" Alice asked

"Well actually, Your Uncle Jobe made dinner today"

"What?" Jude and I ask

"Yep, he didn't have any help as well"

"Lord have mercy" Jude says

"Oh c'mon I'm sure it won't that bad, right?" I ask

"Yeah, let's be positive, we don't know how it will turn out" Denise says

And in that moment Jobe walks out of the Kitchen and wipes his hands on the apron

"Hello everyone glad we're all here, Dinner is nearly ready" He says dressed like one of those chefs from ratatouille

"What are you wearing" Jude asks

"My chef outfit, it's great right?" Jobe asks

Jude looks at me with a smirk and I hit his bicept

"Be nice" I say

"Fine"

"Ok if you'd all just make your way to the dining room" Jobe says

We Make our way to the dining room, take our seats and patiently wait for Jobe to lay the food on the table

When he finally does we all look at it in horror

"Bon appetit, dig in"

Nobody moves

A sigh is heard next to me coming from Jude

"Guys, dinner is served" Jobe says with a bright smile

"Right, well here we go" I say reaching for the rice

I take a spoon full and place it on my plate

And everybody else follows dishing up for themselves

I turn towards the kids and ask them what the would like to eat

And they both tell me as I place the food on their plates

We say grace and Denise turns to Jobe

"Are you not eating love?" Denise asks Jobe trying to prolong the inevitable

"No I already had something to eat, so that there would be enough food for everyone, if anyone wanted seconds"

"Well isn't that nice of you Jobe" I say

"Thank you, now go on and eat, your food will get cold"

Everyone starts by going for different things on their plate and placing it in their mouths

Alice starts with her piece of chicken, continuously chewing it with  determination and one of her eyebrows raised

I turn to Alicia and see her trying to figure out what she's just put into her mouth, is it rice,mashed potatoes or both

Next I see Denise and Mark exchange looks and open their pastries that are in front of them to reveal a brown looking gravy with what looks like meat

A cough is heard besides me, coming from none other than my Husband

He's picking at his plate with the same facial expression as Alicia trying to figure out if it's mashed pumpkin or is it mashed carrots and why the pasta is in a ball shape

"So guys how is it?"

"Great Jobe I really like the pasta, really unique way of making it, you're gonna need to give me the recipe for this" I say

Jude and the kids look at me with horror, like I've just said the most diabolical thing in the world

"Yeah, the pasties are really delicious, I like the chicken inside it" Denise says

"That's beef" Jobe says

"Oh, well I like it very much, right Mark?" She asks

"Yep, Most definitely, really delicious"

"And you Jude, how's you meal?" Jobe asks

"Uhm, it's, I can't put it into words, it's just so good that I have nothing to say that can describe the taste, I'm speechless"

"Alicia, Alice?" Jobe asks

"Yeah, I really like the chicken uncle Jobe, my favourite, I wish mommy made it like this" Alice says

"Well I'll give her the recipe and you can have it every night"

"My God" Jude mutters under his breath

"Great" she replies with the brightest smile

"Alicia?"

"I love the Mashed potatoes, it's like nana made them" she replies

We all look at him and he looks proud of himself

"I'll go and get dessert, I made it myself"

"Oh wow, just when you think you've seen it all, there's another suprise" Jude says

"Oh there will be plenty more surprises" Jobe replies and goes to the kitchen

For a moment it's quiet, until Alice taps my arm

"Mom, what's this?" She whispers pointing to her plate

"I don't know love, I'm just as confused"

The silence resumes again, I look out the window and see Charlie the Family Dog watching us from the outside

I turn to Jude and he looks at me and I nod my head towards Charle whose outside and Jude understands

"Alright everyone hand me your plates" Jude says

"Why?"

"Just do it quickly, c'mon hurry up" he says while taking everyone's plate

"Jude what are you about to do" Denise asks

"Has anyone fed Charlie today?"

"No not yet, why"

"Well he's about to get his first meal" Jude says

And quickly Walks out the house through the front door and puts the food into Charlie's doggy bowl

He quickly walks back into the house and hands everyone their plates back and sits back down

"This doesn't feel right to do" Mark says

"The hospital is not too far away dad, do you feel like going to visit today?" Jude asks

"No, I don't"

"Alright everybody, here we are ... crepes" Jobe says

"Now mind you they are store bought so please don't kill me, Plan A Failed, it was suppose to be a trifle"

"Oh, no Jobe sorry, we know how you were looking forward to it, don't worry it's the fact that you made an effort, that what counts" Denise says

"Thanks mom let's dig in shall we?"

"Certainly"

We eat the crepes in silence until Jobe looks at our previous plates from his meal that he prepared

"You guys must have been pretty Hungry, you cleared the plates" he says

"Yeah, the meal was really divine, to say the least" I reply and everyone agrees by nodding their heads

After having dessert we all take time to relax, spending Family time and catching up on the recent events of what has been happening in our lives

"So, what did you do after she went around saying you were sleeping with the boss" Denise asks as we're now sat on the sofa she's referring to the thing I promised I'd tell her later

"I reported her, she had no right, I earned that position fair and square she had no right to sabotage me" I reply

"And where is she now?"

"Fired, they found our she was actually stealing sums of money from the firm"

"What?"

"Yeah"

"Babe, I think it's time to go home, the girls are asleep" Jude says holding each child with one arm as they use each of his shoulders as their pillows

"Alright then I'll grab my coat" I say standing up from the sofa and walking to where my coat is

"Wait, you forgot the recipes" Jobe says

I hadn't forgotten I was just hoping he did though

"Oh snap, yeah hand them over"

"Here I've already written them down for you" he says handing me 2 A5 papers

"My goodness how thoughtful of you"

"It's not a problem, really"

"Alright everyone we're on our way,thank you so much for dinner Jobe"

"No problem, it was my pleasure, do you guys want a takeaway, before you go?"

"No thank you Jobe we're quiet stuffed"

"Alright"

We way our goodbyes and drive to the home we have in England

"Hand them over"

"What?"

"The recipes"

I hand them over to him and he throws them in the bin

"Jude"

"What, we both know you weren't going to make them, they would've probably just ended up in the bin"

"Yeah but what if I actually wanted to try the recipes"

"Don't play around like that babe"

I laugh and take one of the girls from him and we walk upstairs and tuck them in their beds

"They really knew what to say, didn't they?"

"It actually concerns me how good they are at lying on the spot, what happens when they're older?"

"I don't know really, i guess we'll cross that bridge when we get there"

"Yeah, I guess"

[edenmemes]

arcane (s2) sentence starters

ep1 - 8. warning for spoilers !

❝ everybody wants to be my enemy. ❞ ❝ you’re our leader. they follow you. i follow you. ❞ ❝ i've seen miracles spring from the hands of mages many times, but so often, they turned to horrors. ❞ ❝ why does anyone commit acts others deem unspeakable? for love. ❞ ❝ in my experience, no one in power is innocent. ❞ ❝ i don't wanna hear another word out of your mouth. ❞ ❝ i keep telling myself that you're different. but you're not. ❞ ❝ i haven't insulted your intelligence. do not insult mine. ❞ ❝ if you see the opening...take the shot. ❞ ❝ it's me. your vile villainess. the author of your nightmares. ❞ ❝ you have no inkling what family is to me. ❞ ❝ our paths diverged long ago. it was affection that held us together. ❞ ❝ i'm done blaming myself for your mistakes. ❞ ❝ there's one thing i know in my bones. there is no force in this world that can control you. ❞ ❝ your talents can be used to build, instead of destroy. ❞ ❝ no beast is more savage than man. ❞ ❝ i am the dirt under your nails. nothing's gonna clean me out. ❞ ❝ the dirt was on both our hands. ❞ ❝ stick your head in the dirt if you want, but this fantasy you've been living out here, it's not gonna last forever. ❞ ❝ now people avert their gaze when i roll by. ❞ ❝ still giving me the silent treatment, huh? ❞ ❝ you think it's so easy? to turn your back while your city looks to you for salvation? ❞ ❝ playing coy doesn't suit you, love. ❞ ❝ is it bad that i'm making friends with my demons? ❞ ❝ can i do the right thing for the wrong reason? ❞ ❝ ever since you dropped into my life, it's like i put on glasses. ❞ ❝ jeez, lady, you crazy? talking to dead people. ❞ ❝ sometimes taking a leap forward means leaving a few things behind. ❞ ❝ that's a past life, kid. and it was about as sweet as last year's milk. ❞ ❝ why is peace always the justification for violence? ❞ ❝ haven't i done you enough favors? ❞ ❝ i must say goodbye to this place now. to you. ❞ ❝ you got that look in your eye again. what are you planning? ❞ ❝ people have lost their heads for less. ❞ ❝ everyone in my life has changed. promise me you won't change. ❞ ❝ wrath must be met with wrath. ❞ ❝ what you've stolen…is more precious than any gold. ❞ ❝ i apologize for the intrusion. i was attempting to sneak in. ❞ ❝ address me with respect, or keep your mouth shut. ❞ ❝ this is what you asked for. heavy is the crown. ❞ ❝ and then what? you take what you need, hang me out to dry? ❞ ❝ do you realize how easy it was for me to track you down here? ❞ ❝ awful, isn't it? losing a loved one. ❞ ❝ i'm sorry. i’m not comfortable trusting our fates to chance. ❞ ❝ you think it's so easy? to turn your back while your city looks to you for salvation? ❞ ❝ whether i'm pulling the pin or not, everyone who gets close to me dies. ❞ ❝ you walk along the edge of danger and it will change you. ❞ ❝ your youth betrays you. patience is a product of age. both of which i possess in abundance. ❞ ❝ we gotta choose right now whether we're gonna throw in the towel or make a stand together. ❞ ❝ i had a different name back then, you know. ❞ ❝ when will you admit that this is just one of your fantasies? ❞ ❝ my arrogance led me to take on more than i could handle. ❞ ❝ such force must be a final resort. ❞ ❝ in my experience, only guilty men answer accusations with silence. ❞ ❝ every time it seems like we might catch a break. ❞ ❝ you're a monster. why? why do all this? ❞ ❝ i must ask you to surrender your weapons. this is a place of peace. ❞ ❝ i still think it's a dumb idea. but i guess you won, and a deal's a deal. ❞ ❝ it’s nice to know there are still good ones left. ❞ ❝ i promise, it's the last offer you're gonna get. ❞ ❝ no matter what i do, i just can’t seem to die. ❞ ❝ maybe i underestimated you. maybe you have the strength i do not. ❞ ❝ you don't actually need my help. you haven't for a long time. ❞ ❝ like it or not, we're in this mess together. ❞ ❝ compassion. hate. two sides of the same coin. ❞ ❝ i have a plan. you’re not gonna like it. ❞ ❝ come closer, will you, babe? ❞ ❝ i'd feared i wouldn't have the chance to speak with you again. ❞

❝ you here to finish me off? ❞ ❝ i thought you were on our side. ❞ ❝ what is up with you? you've been out of it all day. ❞ ❝ as good as it feels to pour everyone's drink, you need to fill your own cup every now and again. ❞ ❝ you must destroy it. it corrupts. consumes. ❞ ❝ sometimes taking a leap forward means leaving a few things behind. ❞ ❝ we do not lament a warrior's death. we avenge it. ❞ ❝ for the gifted, arrogance is the ultimate threat. ❞ ❝ why do you persist? after everything i've done? ❞ ❝ you're not alone. look at my shadow right behind you like a ghost. ❞ ❝ there is nothing to gain from this senseless bloodshed. ❞ ❝ i choose wrong every time. and because of it, i've lost everyone. ❞ ❝ go. before i do something i regret. ❞ ❝ i don't wanna lose what makes me "me" chasing some wild dream. ❞ ❝ i'm gonna find a way back, with or without you. ❞ ❝ i'm sorry. i've been an idiot. and an ass. you're hurting too. ❞ ❝ one's thoughts are more easily gathered in isolation. ❞ ❝ all right, out with it. what do you want from me? ❞ ❝ hey, in case i don't remember to tell you tomorrow, you've always meant the world to me. ❞ ❝ you ever wish you could just stay in one moment? ❞ ❝ if you're here to kill me, make sure to finish the job. ❞ ❝ i think beneath that mask you're scared. ❞ ❝ i must say that since i've met you, i've truly lived. ❞ ❝ never seen you give up on anything. ❞ ❝ i have the feeling that you'll be running this place soon. ❞ ❝ i think beneath that mask you're scared. ❞ ❝ i'm choosing to fight. and i pray that you will join me. ❞ ❝ this place will grow on you. you'll see. ❞ ❝ you're never gonna give up on me, are you? ❞ ❝ i think the cycle only ends when you find the will to walk away. ❞ ❝ hating you…i've hated myself. i just don't have the energy for it any longer. ❞ ❝ greatest thing we can do in life is find the power to forgive. ❞ ❝ oh, don't get all mushy on me now. ❞ ❝ i'm always with you. even when we're worlds apart. ❞ ❝ just 'cause you're having a bad day, don't take it out on me. ❞ ❝ look at the price of your ambition. you've sacrificed everything. ❞ ❝ you taught me the best lies come wrapped in truth. ❞ ❝ i feel like i woke up in the wrong universe. ❞ ❝ oh, spare the sympathy. ❞ ❝ uh, you do realize code phrases don't work when you make them up on the spot? ❞ ❝ desperation is the doorway to oblivion. ❞ ❝ it was a mistake to come here. ❞ ❝ this will have consequences. ❞ ❝ i know it's my fault that i'm here all alone. ❞ ❝ if you choose to flee, don't stop running. ❞ ❝ go and make some mistakes. you live and you learn. ❞ ❝ let me guess. you think i'm holding myself back. ❞ ❝ i have people back home who need me. ❞ ❝ i’m sorry i haven’t been around. ❞

[hup123hup123slapslap]

So a thought has been kicking around my head for a bit...what if Helio knew exactly what he was signing up for by making Kristen his chosen one?

It has always struck me as odd that when describing Doreen in Helioic heaven, Brennan mentioned her flirting with men and women. It also strikes me as odd that Kristen never got any pushback from Helio about turning her back on him. Even if he was similarly 'out of the picture' like sol was while Arthur was wrecking havoc, Kristen's powers should have faded when she fully committed to not worshipping him. You need to worship a god to get powers, and this is emphasized heavily in the latest episode. Kristen worshipping the vague idea of religion but Definitely Not Helio just doesn't cut it. Sure, taking away a PCs powers wasn't really in the cards in season one, but Brennan works very well and very caringly with what he has to establish as canon.

Kristen was looking for a reason to drop Helio from the get-go. His frat boy appearance and non-answer to a nearly impossible question didn't truly matter at the core of her feelings. She wanted an out from the prison she was trapped in with the Helioic faith, even if she didn't realize it fully. She had tension with her mom and her ideals from the scene one! She wanted to connect with people the church actively shunned. Helio was never the true problem.

Now, gods are shaped by their worshippers. So on some level Helio is shaped by people with shitty ideals. But there's still a foothold of good, especially if there are out and proud gays in heaven. Especially if Kristen Applebees of all people is the chosen one.

When you have worshippers misinterpreting your whole deal, going with Sol's shitty messaging and transferring it onto you and using it for bad things, what can you do as a god? Because you ARE what they say you are. So how can you fight back?

Well. You make your chosen one someone that embodies your true heart. Someone that can actually turn the tides of your worship.

There is an emphasis on tracker reinventing and revitalizing her religion. Changing it for the better. Taking the old and not tossing it out, but making it better.

Isn't that what Kristen struggles with the most? That's what she needs to learn how to do.

Tracker also established that she can worship multiple gods when she helped with Yes?. Kristen doesn't need to settle for one even if she (fingers crossed) brings Kassandra back.

Because the season opened with the slow apocalypse of endless night. Endless daytime would end similarly. There has to be a balance. They are two sides of the same coin. Day and night. The surety of the sun and the doubt of the shadows.

Kristen wants both. And she can fucking have it if she decides to.

Ally once said they appreciate that the enemy is always the church. Organized religion. Kristen is perfect for disorganized religion though. Chill frat boy vibes and anxious doubts and the ultimate message of 'just do your best'.

I think religious trauma is a compelling, close to the heart topic for a lot of people. And some turn away from religion entirely and wash their hands of it. But some people don't. Kristen is a cleric. She can't. She wants a god, she wants answers, and she just can't find them in the established community she was raised in. That doesn't mean the core of her religion was wrong. The church was. So you take the religion and you harness it in a way that means something to you.

Maybe Kristen being desperate enough to invite Helio back into her life is what this has all been leading to.

She can remake a god. She's done it before. Because Kassandra was good at the core. Maybe Helio can be too.

[monzabee]

🪩 || bee's masterlist

AN IMPORTANT MESSAGE FROM THE AUTHOR!

welcome to my masterlist! you can find all of my works as of now under the cut, and here's a masterlist key to help you navigate your way through!

masterlist key: — social media au - ✧ — fic - ✶ — drabbles - ✫ — headcanons - ᕯ

MAX VERSTAPPEN (MV1)

fuck being underrated ✧ : the one where Max is dating his team principal's daugther, who happens to be the hottest model of the year.

third time's the charm ✧ : the one where you are there to celebrate Max winning his third title, and the whole world is there to witness it.

two sides of the same coin ✶ : the one where you try to convince yourself that you're not falling for your teammate, but can't help it when you realise that he is not that different from you after all.

beach read ✶ : the one where you and Max go on a holiday for the first time, and you realize just how much you love 'Vacation Max'.

viva las vegas (+18) ✶ : the one where you and Max celebrate his win in a way you’ve never done before. [minors dni!]

prison for life ✶ : the one where if anybody hurts you, Max is going to prison for life.

CHARLES LECLERC (CL16)

how you get the girl ✶ : the one where you and your boyfriend Charles attend a gala for a friend and run into Harry Styles – who happens to be your ex.

in my lover era! ✧ : the one where Charles becomes a Swiftie because of his girlfriend.

like real people do (+18) ✶ : the one where you are having sex with your boyfriend, Charles, for the first time but he wants everything to be perfect for you. [minors dni!]

you'll change your name or change your mind ✶ : the one where you find your way back home, even if the journey takes longer than you think.

this is a relationship, that i don't think anyone saw coming ✶ : the one where you and Charles think you are successfully fooling everyone on the grid, when in reality you are the ones being fooled.

the name game ✶ : the one where you and Charles try to get through one of the first hardships of parenthood.

lean on you ✶ : the one where you learn to lean on Charles more than you thought you ever could.

red, white, blue's in the sky ✧ : the one where Charles has an olympian girlfriend.

T.G.I.F ✶ : the one where writing your thesis is harder than you think, but Charles is here to help you through all of it.

pon de replay (+18) ✶ : the one where Charles decide to prove to everyone that it is him that you belong to, and only him. [minors dni!]

the smallest man who ever lived ✶ : the one where you’re thrown into a conundrum when you learn the news of your husband, Charles’, infidelity.

you can check out the rest of the series from here!

DANIEL RICCIARDO (DR3)

nonesense ✧ : the one where you and Daniel fall in love with a song, so you must share it with the whole internet.

girl crush ✶ : the one where both you and Daniel meet your celebrity crushes in the course of a weekend, and decide to give it a go.

you can check out the rest of the series from here!

redbull gives you wings ✧ : the one where red bull brings together people, again..

LANDO NORRIS (LN4)

good riddance ✧ : the one where internet discovers that Lando's girlfriend is a singer, who happens to be on a world tour.

short stack ✧ : the one where the internet is obsessed about the height difference between you and your boyfriend, Lando.

déjà vu (beyoncé’s version) ✶ : the one where a bad prank leads to you and Lando exploring an option you thought was not an option.

bad idea right? ✶ : the one where seeing Lando tonight is a bad idea, right?

greedy ✧ : the one where lando finds a certain singer cute.

diet pepsi (+18) ✶ : the one where you and Lando have a rather interesting way of resolving an argument. [minors dni!]

MICK SCHUMACHER (MS47)

a vettel and a schumacher walk into a bar ✶ : the one where Mick is dating Seb's eldest daughter, but forgets to mention this to his mentor and close friend. another problem? he can't seem to keep his eyes (or his hands) off of you.

you can check out the rest of the series from here!

heartbreak hotel ✧ : the one where you run into your ex, Mick, at Las Vegas, and chaos ensues.

ARTHUR LECLERC (AL12)

baby honey ✶ : the one where Arthur swear he's not thinking about you, his best friend, all the time – just today, yesterday, and tomorrow night.

LEWIS HAMILTON (LH44)

eight words when i think about us (+18) ✶ : the one where Coachella has both you and Lewis high on each other. [minors dni!]

he's a genius ('cause he loves a woman like her) ✧ : the one where you and Lewis (attempt to) soft launch your relationship.

hot girls support 44 ✫ : the one where your husband realises that you are, indeed, his number one fan.

what you do to me (+18) ✶ : the one where Lewis returns home to you – the one thing he desperately wants, but won't let himself have completely. [minors dni!]

partition (+18) ✶ : the one where you and Lewis are stuck in traffic in Paris, and decide to make the most of the situation. [minors dni!]

bom dia! ✧ : the one where Lewis decides to spend some time in Brazil during winter break with a special someone.

run for the hills (+18) ✶ : the one where fate decides to bring you back into Lewis’ life, making him question his belief in fate. [minors dni!]

PIERRE GASLY (PG10)

feather ✶ : the one where Pierre is the one left mourning after your relationship ends.

all around the world (pretty girls) ✧ : the one where the internet finds out about you and Pierre's relationship.

CARLOS SAINZ (CS55)

the lusty month of may (+18) ✶ : the one where it's that darling month when everyone throws self-control away, and you and Carlos decide to do a wretched thing – or two. [minors dni!]

mr.big ✧ : the one where there he was, wearing armani on a sunday, your boyfriend, Carlos.

you can check out the rest of the series from here!

OSCAR PIASTRI (OP81)

short n' sweet ✧ : the one where in an attempt to figure out who Y/N is dating, the internet come up with theories only to realise she is dating none other than Oscar Piastri and chaos ensues.

LANCE STROLL (LS18)

kiss it better ✶: the one where a crazy idea turns out to be the best possible thing for you and Lance.

©𝗆𝗈𝗇𝗓𝖺𝖻𝖾𝖾 𝟤𝟢𝟤𝟥. 𝗉𝗅𝖾𝖺𝗌𝖾 𝗇𝗈𝗍𝖾 𝗍𝗁𝖺𝗍 𝖺𝗅𝗅 𝗈𝖿 𝗆𝗒 𝗐𝗈𝗋𝗄𝗌 𝖺𝗋𝖾 𝗉𝗋𝗈𝗍𝖾𝖼𝗍𝖾𝖽 𝗎𝗇𝖽𝖾𝗋 𝖼𝗈𝗉𝗒𝗋𝗂𝗀𝗁𝗍, 𝖺𝗇𝖽 𝗇𝗈𝗍 𝖺𝗏𝖺𝗂𝗅𝖺𝖻𝗅𝖾 𝖿𝗈𝗋 𝖼𝗈𝗉𝗒𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝗈𝗋 𝗋𝖾𝗉𝗈𝗌𝗍𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝗈𝗇 𝗍𝗁𝗂𝗌 𝗈𝗋 𝗈𝗍𝗁𝖾𝗋 𝗉𝗅𝖺𝗍𝖿𝗈𝗋𝗆𝗌.

[khruschevshoe]

There's something to be said about Heaven Sent/Hell Bent, despite the Doctor overthrowing the Time Lord Council and spending four and a half billion years in the confession dial and him and Clara and Me meeting at the end of universe, therefore technically spanning the longest time span, being fundamentally the smallest in stakes of any of the modern Doctor Who finales. At the end of the day, there is no threat to earth or the galaxy or the universe or reality. It's just about two people and the way that they turn each other inside out and the way that they reflect each other as two sides of the same coin and the way their relationship was always going to end this way- with the flip of the coin, spinning in the air, each trying to override the other, each trying to take control of the story, each haunting each other forever.

It's under my microscope. It's rotating rent free in my head. It's everything good about Moffat's writing- fairytale vibes, wrenching character work, two characters that thematically parallel each other- and none of the bad, because he's not trying to be too clever or fuck with the rules too much, there's a couple of simple concepts played straight to their inevitable conclusions: Clara Oswald needs to die but the Doctor can't let it happen, he wants her to forget but she can't let it happen, so they both will do the most devasting things in the world to stop the other and they both get their way in the end but only in a way that will leave them haunting each other forever.

And it's so fucking good.

[saturnsbabyboii]

🍓Synastry Astro Observations🍓

(Cause I haven't been active for three months)

🍓Regardless of the sign a planet is in, it is important to check the aspects it makes to other planets. This is especially the case for synastry charts and readings as aspects create an activation that can enhance, block or overturn the energy of said planets.

🍓People with Sun conjunct Sun aspect are very competitive with one another. This is usually exasperated when one or both have this aspect in a Fire house.

🍓Natives with Mars squaring others Neptune are usually challenging people realities. For the Mars native, the Neptune person is usually a cause of drama or someone that is petty or inauthentic. The Mars person can easily see through the Neptune person facade. However positively, the Neptune person can soothe the Mars native, despite their defensiveness. For the Neptune native on the other hand, this could be a relationship where the Mars person helps them overcome and outgrow harmful cycles, or actualize their dreams. Worst case, the Mars person is very harmful to the Neptune native mental health and psyche. They could be an abuser of sorts.

🍓Mercury trine Mars are people that can help each other process things and brainstorm as they work very well with one another balancing ideas and workload. This is the dream team for any project.

🍓People with their MC in square aspect to your Sun might feel embarrassed to be seen with you in public. Best case they prefer to be more personal and private with you, bringing you into their personal space and away from their outer persona.

🍓Personally, I have found that the predominance of Squares usually only works in context of friendship rather than in romance, sex or family. Although it could create conflict between personalities, when done right, it can signify support, companionship or even someone that'll be instrumental in helping you break out of toxic patterns or elevate into a higher level and field.

🍓MC square MC is an indication of having drama or a falling out publicly.

🍓Lunar Nodes in aspect to your personal planets have a strong effect on you, although it would be temporary. Meanwhile, someone Nodes in your angular houses (1st, 4th, 7th, 10th) will play a big role in your life. This is would be particularly true if they're in aspect to your Ascendant/Descendant/IC/MC.

🍓Aspects between Venus and Venus create more harmony and attraction than positive aspects between Mars and Venus/ Mars and Mars.

🍓Jupiter conjunct Saturn are two sides of the same coin. They're two people with the same ideals and principles yet they approach and practice them differently.

🍓Even though it is not "official" or as widely done, but I give great importance to the compatibility between the houses in synastry, regardless of the planets present. Since the houses are a reflection of our life map, it can help us better understand our similarities and differences, plus our possible standpoints.

🍓When looking over synastry with a parent, take a good look at the aspects made by their Saturn and Chiron to your personal placements. Chiron in specific can show where/what they unleash or heal their trauma through you.

🍓Mars opposition Saturn is a high indication of a relationship being described as a "Cold War".

🍓Having Chiron and/or Pluto conjunct someone inner planets means you're are here to serve them karma or bring them justice.

🍓Ascendant conjunct Venus creates a very beautiful pairing. Whether it's romantic or platonic, this pair accentuate one another's beauty.

🍓Check the aspects your Neptune makes to the other person. The planets aspected indicate where do you overlook traits, paint a false picture, or what are you in denial about regrading the person. This works in terms of justifying behavior, making up a connection, and possibly lying on or magnifying "bad traits" in others that don't exist. It also goes the other way around.

🍓The placement of someone's Moon in your houses can summarize their emotional state towards you or what they find in common with you on a deeper level. For example:

Someone's Moon in your 1st house can be a person that feels endowed or in awe of your appearance (especially when their Moon is inconjunction with your Ascendant). You may carry yourself in a way that they relate to or deeply desire. This person may also be someone that shares superficial feelings of you or thinks that you're shallow. Possible jealousy.

Someone's Moon in your 2nd house is a sign of codependence, specifically of the Moon native towards you. Since the 2nd house rules resources and self esteem, this person may require a lot from you, and might be a bit too comfortable taking things from you. You yourself may also enable this behavior and don't see a problem with it. In some cases, this could be a person that is emotionally supportive and reinforcing of your own worth. In contrast, this could be someone that creates blockages and hinders your material growth.

Someone's Moon in your 3rd house will be a person that you feel very comfortable talking to. This can be someone you find out that they're from the same hometown as you or have lived/is living in your childhood neighborhood. A potential life long roomie. An indication of a nurturing or "motherly" way of communicating with one another.

Someone's Moon in your 10th is similar to that of the 1st, in that the Moon person would be either in awe or jealous of you. In this house, this is exhibited overtly. This person could be your biggest cheerleader or biggest hater. Something about you succeeding (or even failing) affects them deeply. It's likely that this person won't have your best interest at heart and may use associating with you as a way to gain fame or monetary wealth. In positive cases, this person could be a confidant in professional environments.

🍓People that have more than two planets in your water houses (4th, 8t, 12th) will have a profound effect on you for the rest of this lifetime. These houses are not only related to our deeper selves and private life, but they're also karmic. Our relationship with such people is much more darker and intimate, showing hidden aspects of ourselves that we may not be aware of. Being around them may be draining as those relationships can feel like a blood oath, to say the least. Particularly for the 12th, this person can unravel you in the best (and worst) ways possible. As the house of hidden enemies, this person might be harmful to you in an unforeseen ways. If both of you share planets in these houses then it's an indication of trauma bonding.

🍓A person with their natal Mars in your 8th house can be someone oddly provoking. Its giving "why do I even like you?". These are not the people you usually find attractive yet they have a strange hold on you. They're your forbidden fruit.

🍓Aspects made to the ascendent can explain ones first impression of another. For example, Venus in aspect to the ascendent describes a sense of intrigue and attraction based off of desire (Opposition), envy (Square), resonance (Conjunct), belonging (Trine), or curiosity (Sextile).

Bye Ugly xoxo

[paperclipninja]

Middle of the night GO thoughts after reflecting on a couple of comments that the 'you're being silly' scene is actually not just the adorable soft exchange I have been caught up in. I mean it is, but it also isn't.

And it got me thinking that the whole of season 2 is like this, almost the entire time we have two truths in play. The whole season is one of duality.

A few examples (there are many more woven throughout but just to illustrate the point):

Right off the bat, the opening scene, it's both ominous and hopeful. Aziraphale is restrained while angel Crowley full of abandon; one angel is aware of the danger of questioning, the other is naïve. Both are experiencing the same moment in rather different ways. It sets the tone of the season immediately and puts in motion this layered truth within the story.

The minisode with wee Morag and Elspeth, the entire graverobbing premise presents us with the dual truth that digging up the dead is bad but the selling of the bodies to the surgeon, thus contributing to saving lives, is good.

Aziraphale grapples with the duality here, justifying the actions of Elspeth by convincing himself that one truth is greater than the other. We also see that Crowley is far more able to recognise the complexity of multiple truths being valid depending on circumstance. This whole minisode feels like Neil showing his hand a little bit, the duality is so explicitly addressed, meanwhile we, the audience, are engaged in a larger unfolding story in which we are observing similar layered truths playing out in different ways.

Now the scene that made this whole thought process unravel, still one of my favourite scenes and will remain so, is the "smitten, I believe...you're being silly" exchange. It is both tender and awful.

Here we have Crowley, expressing his very real fear of JimGabriel, opening up to Aziraphale that he doesn't feel safe in the bookshop because of the constant fear he will wake up, and Aziraphale just looks at him with heart eyes and tells him he's being silly. This flags so loudly that we're watching two characters who are experiencing very different versions of their current reality, due to past experience, yes, but also, Aziraphale and Crowley each have their own idea about the right way to react to the current situation.

It's been pointed out by many before me, but the ball is another example of incredible juxtaposition and an extraordinary display of two truths existing at once. It is both incredibly romantic and an actual nightmare.

It is reflected, once again, in the way Aziraphale and Crowley are experiencing it, we know one character is caught up in the romance, the other in the horror show, but as a viewer, we are being tasked with holding both truths in our mind simultaneously. And both are true.

Aziraphale the entire season is both giddy in love and completely dismissive of Crowley. It is adorable and infuriating at the same time.

And yes, it is a reflection of the very duality the entire premise of Good Omens presents us with - that something can be good and bad at the same time, pure and corrupt, that the entire binary of Heaven and Hell/good and evil is flawed because those concepts can and do co-exist.

But the way it is seen in the interactions on a personal level this season is what has leapt out at me. It's why I think we see people falling into different interpretations of a lot of the scenes and moments, because they are more than that, they are observations. We are often observing two sides of the same coin, and both are true. The sheer genius of it and the way it is a mirror to the characters and the entire concept of the show we are observing is, quite frankly, mind boggling.

And it all comes to a head in the final fifteen™. There is so much duality in play here that it is no wonder there are hundreds of posts untangling bits of it and trying to extract the meaning from within the many layers. It's because we are given two truths in this final scene that are both heartbreaking.

Crowley loves Aziraphale and wants them to be together, free at last. Aziraphale loves Crowley and wants them to be together, free at last.

BUT

Aziraphale wants to use the system to keep them both safe. Crowley wants to escape the system to keep them both safe.

And then all the moments of duality between them throughout the season reach a critical juncture: Aziraphale in love but dismissive, Crowley understanding that Heaven = good is too simplistic and trying to compel Aziraphale to remember the lesson from Edinburgh ("when Heaven ends life here on Earth, it'll be just as dead as if Hell ended it"), Crowley trying to use the notion of romance to counter the nightmare with a desperate kiss.

It's a complete inversion of those two truths in the opening scene of the season, the entire scene is at the same time ominous and hopeful, but it is Aziraphale who largely being naïve and Crowley who is aware of the danger.

I mean, it was all spelled out for us really, this duality and the fact that those multiple truths in play were always going to come to a head. It was all there, wrapped up in this quote:

"What does your exactly mean, exactly? I feel like your exactly and my exactly are different exactlies".