#bonus grimed up version

[jeleynai]

Nap Time <3

[loganhowlettshousewife]

lazy mornings and the proposal

animal - bonus headcanons

friendly reminder that i am not a writer, i'm just a girl who loves logan howlett and wanted to write something exploring his animalistic side since i so rarely see it done. my first language is also not english, so please do not be rude when giving me any feedback.

i wanted to let everyone know that even with the epilogue coming out soon and the series being officially over, i'm still not ready to let go of these two. so if you have any ideas or prompts or questions about feral!logan feel free to submit an ask!

warnings: mentions of sex, light sweat kink (oops)

series masterlist │my masterlist

there’s nothing better than a lazy morning with logan, staying in bed long past sunrise, chasing the warmth that can be found in each others arms. it’s rare, these days, now that he’s gotten a job as a lumberjack and has to be up fairly early most mornings for work, making sure to wake you before he leaves, kissing you deeply and reminding you that he loves you. gone are the days where the two of you would stay home together, locked in your own little world with no one to bother you.

he’d wanted - no, he’d needed, really- to get a job. it gave him something to do with his days, a purpose other than stalking your every move, following behind you like a shadow as you went about your day. it’s a distraction, and a welcome one, one that gives him the opportunity to be a more balanced version of himself, to find peace and trust that you aren’t going to disappear if he leaves you out of his sight for more than a few seconds.

he brings home a decent paycheck, much more than you were making by selling the extra produce from your garden. it’s unnecessary, everything you own had once belonged to your grandparents and has long been paid off, but it’s nice to have the extra cash, to be able to go into town with logan and splurge on expensive alcohol for him and gorgeous new dresses for you.

he’s good at what he does, hacking away at wood with his unnatural strength given to him by his mutation. he’s the best at what he does, to the point where you occasionally worry it’s become too obvious that he’s not like the others, but he always comes home safe.

the smell of wood and sweat cling to him like a second skin and you bury your face in his neck, understanding his obsession with doing the same to you, loving the way the smell of him surrounds you, makes you feel like he’s the only thing in the world. maybe it should be gross, he’s exerted himself all day and is covered by the proof of it, but there’s something about it that makes you melt into him every time.

he takes off his muddy shoes and picks you up, ignoring your squeal of protest at the unexpected gesture, smirks when you wrap your legs around his waist. he brings you into your bedroom to take the stress of his day out on your body or into the bathroom where you run your hands over his bare skin and wash away anything that isn’t your loving touch. either way, the tension leaves him the moment he’s returned to you, able to recognise that you’re safe.

you love the life you’ve built, the ease and comfort of it, and yet those lazy mornings, so few and far between, are still your favourite. the days where logan doesn't have to go into work and you push back your daily chores for later because you would much prefer to stay snuggled up in bed, laughing as he kisses your neck and bare shoulders, twinning your arms around his neck to pull him closer.

the night he proposes starts off like any other. he returns home from work to the smell of dinner in the oven, takes you apart under the warm stream of water from the showerhead beating down on your skin, lets you wash away the grime from his body and dig your hands into the tense muscles of his back, massaging away the day’s activities. he melts into you, letting you care for him in a way he’d never let anyone else, and you smile beatifically.

when you exit the shower, it’s to the sound of the oven timer going off, announcing that the dinner you’d prepared for the two of you is ready. you hardly notice when logan doesn’t follow you out of the bathroom and into the kitchen as usual - some days he returns from a long day on the job and refuses to leave your side, on others he needs moments of solitude peppered in to keep the overstimulation at bay.

he stops in your shared bedroom as you plate the food, giving logan double your portion size as usual.

his body requires more energy to function, his healing factor taking a lot out of him. it’s not something logan ever noticed, since he doesn’t bother to worry about his own health most of the time, but you see the way it affects him when he doesn’t eat the way he should. it’s horribly taxing on his body, making his veins protrude from his skin in harsh lines, a reminder that no matter how easy it is to ignore it when looking at his muscular and imposing stature, his body is still starving.

you’ve made it your mission to feed him, and so you narrow your eyes into a glare until he finishes his plate, leaning over afterwards to kiss the annoyance from your lips, muttering praises and thanks that have your skin tingling and face feeling hot. 

he’s healthier now, a layer of fat covering his muscles, a softness to his body that wasn’t there before. it’s something you pride yourself on, the knowledge that you’re taking good care of him.

he doesn’t talk much throughout dinner, though he never does. you tell him about the latest book you’ve started reading, going back and forth on whether or not you’re truly enjoying it, complaining about the characters personalities while raving about the writing style. it makes logan smile, watching you be so passionate.

he gives you a few vague sentences about his day at work when you press him about it. “it’s not that interesting,” he says, the same excuse he gives every day. occasionally, he’ll have some gossip to share about the men he works with, his enhanced hearing allowing him to listen to their conversations without being forced to partake in them, but not today. “would much rather listen to you talk, darlin’.”

with desert in front of you and a peaceful lull in they conversation he takes your hand, kisses the back of it with his slightly chapped lips before getting down on one knee and pulling out the ring he’d bought a few weekends ago while you perused the farmer’s market stalls. it’s not big or flashy, the night is hardly out of the ordinary in any way, but it’s perfect. your eyes prick with tears that you attempt to hold back but fall anyway the moment you blink.

this is what makes yours and logan’s relationship, the understanding that there’s no need to be anything but yourselves, that as long as he’s here promising to love you forever, pleading you to do the same, there’s nothing else that could come close to matching the joy in your heart as you say yes.

taglist: @mystiquesvendetta @raeinyourdreams @babey-fruit-bat @meetmypointlessaddiction @kneelforloki @deaky-with-a-c @hypermarvellove @littlepeanut03 @the-ruler-of-death @aliengutzstuff @misscrissfemmefatale @mynamesstevenwithav @teaganthemorningstar @blackkatzz @leryg0 @fries11 @forksloree @i5uckersblog @dragovegogrimborn @quillycrow @melday0105 @just-a-little-cellist @scorpiosaintt @akasha157-blog @insanesosciopath @eridektbh @trickstergabriel69 @lord-bingus666

[wexarethewalkingxdead]

MULTIMUSE QUESTIONAIRE

RULES: Answer the questions with the Muses that would best fit the answers. Bonus if you give details why. If tagged, copy and paste into a new post – DO NOT REBLOG!

1) Rank your softest Muse and your toughest Muse. (Personality-wise) - I'm going to answer this from softest to toughest muse. I'm not going to use numbers or anything such as that. I'll list them in that order from soft to tough and then everyone in between. Softest to toughest: Beth Greene, Charley Eaton, Sophia Peletier, Andrea Harrison, Daryl Dixon, Carol Peletier, Rick Grimes, and Shane Walsh.

2) Which Muse would blow through $1000 quickly? - Probably Andrea Harrison.

3) Do any of them have nicknames? Is there a meaning behind them? - Andrea - no. Beth - Doodlebug is what Hershel called her when she was little because she was always doodling and writing songs on whatever scratch piece of paper she could find. Carol - no. Charles/Charlotte - Charley. They just like the way it sounds better than their full first name. Daryl - no. Rick - Deputy because of his job as a King County Sheriff's Deputy. and Cowbow because he's always wearing boots. Shane - Deputy for the same reason as Rick. Sophia - Soph because it's the shortened version of her name. Blue Eyes because her eyes are blue. Anyone rarely calls her this.

4) Are any of them up-to-speed on the latest trends? Anyone more old school? - I don't think trends matter in an apocalypse so they're probably all behind on trends.

5) Who has the best relationship with their siblings? - Andrea had a strained relationship with her younger sister. They were beginning to patch that up with the Outbreak hit. Beth has/had an amazing relationship with her siblings. They all got along great. Carol didn't have any siblings. Charley had/has a brother. They were/are close. Daryl has Merle, and their relationship is strained and complicated. Rick doesn't have any siblings. Shane doesn't have any siblings. Sophia doesn't have any siblings.

6) Karaoke night! Who is likely to grab the mic first and bust out a tune? - Beth Greene.

7) Who is least likely to enter a beauty pageant/model? - Daryl Dixon.

8) If your Muses visited a haunted house where actors scare you, who would panic and who would be unfazed? - Sophia would be the one panicking. Shane and Daryl would be tied for the ones who are unfazed by attempting to be scared.

9) Are any of your Muses particular about taking certain modes of transportation? - None of them have any specifics about which mode of transportation gets them where they are going. But Daryl prefers not to ride horseback if it can be prevented.

10) Share a little-known fact about any Muse. - Sophia managed to talk a tattoo artist into piercing her belly button without Carol's permission before she turned eighteen. She decided that since she was capable of killing people, then she was capable and mature enough to make a decision to get a piercing in her own skin.

tagged by: @armandlucienduval tagging: @norvstforthvwickvd @araneorum @careol @emeryfleming @corxunum @florrentine @ghostofwinter @midncghtrcin @oftoska @savedpeople @somniaxperdita @secondhandmckie @torntruth @uncxntrxllable @unheald

[jcmarchi]

Funko Fusion Preview - Get Your Head In The Game - Game Informer

New Post has been published on https://thedigitalinsider.com/funko-fusion-preview-get-your-head-in-the-game-game-informer/

Funko Fusion Preview - Get Your Head In The Game - Game Informer

If you’re a fan of a popular movie or TV show from any time in the last several decades, chances are, they’ve made a Funko Pop figurine of the main characters. The brand is ubiquitous in pop culture, so it was only a matter of time before it got a big video game adaptation. This sort of game could easily be a cheap cash grab, but after watching a preview demo and listening to one of the head developers speak about it, I’m confident that Funko Fusion is much more than that.

You’ve never played a game by developer 10:10 Games, but you probably know the work of its staff – the founders of the studio are some of the former architects of the Lego games developed by Traveler’s Tales, including CEO Jon Burton, COO Paul Flanagan, and design director Arthur Parsons, who leads the demo. He boots up a level based on John Carpenter’s 1982 horror classic The Thing, which signifies one of the main elements that separates this title from the kid-friendly Lego titles; this game is rated T for Teen and references loads of media properties that are decidedly not for children. Still, the world is charming and lighthearted, so when a Funko Pop is impaled through the side of the head, it’s more goofy than ghastly.

[embedded content]

Parsons, playing as Kurt Russel’s MacReady, fights off some Norwegians using the game’s third-person shooting mechanics. According to Parsons, all characters have melee and ranged options, though they had to get creative for some characters. While He-Man uses his signature sword, OJ (the protagonist from Jordan Peele’s Nope) swings around a miniature version of one of the inflatable tube men from his movie. Parsons dispatches enemies easily, which I imagine is due to the game’s relatively low difficulty, his experience working on it as a developer, and the fact that every enemy has an outrageously large head, ideal for headshots.

Funko Fusion will ultimately feature over 20 IPs in the game, mostly from NBCUniversal properties, though they’ve also made licensing deals with other companies.

Here’s a list of some that we know so far:

Back to the Future

Battlestar Galactica

Child’s Play

Five Nights at Freddy’s

Hot Fuzz

Invincible

Jaws

Jurassic World

Knight Rider

Masters of the Universe

Megan

The Mummy

Nope

Scott Pilgrim vs. The World

Shaun of the Dead

The Thing

The Umbrella Academy

Voltron

The Walking Dead

Xena: Warrior Princess

Each IP will include playable characters, and many will include levels, though the scope of each level will vary by the franchise. Some, like The Thing, will get a proper, full-sized level, while others exist as secret cameo levels players can unlock in other worlds. Poking around the frozen outpost in the demo, Parsons travels through a portal to reach a world based on Shaun of the Dead, where he has to escort a car of civilians to the safety of the Winchester. While there, he transforms into He-Man and shows off the zombie enemies, which turn the hero into a zombified version of himself. Even though it’s just a cameo level, it’s much larger than I initially expected, likely packing plenty of easter eggs in for fans of the movie.

Players can move through these levels in whatever order they want to progress through the game’s main story. Parsons explains that this modular approach allows them to continue to support the game after launch by easily adding new characters and levels into the mix. The first instance of this is with the game’s pre-order bonus, which includes Rick Grimes and Michonne from The Walking Dead, complete with alternate outfits.

It’s been years since the last Lego game, and with this team of developers, I’m excited to watch them attempt to fill that gap. Luckily, I won’t have to wait long. Funko Fusion is coming to PlayStation 5, Xbox Series X/S, PlayStation 4, Switch, and PC on September 13. 

[trans-ylvania]

okok ill put it in an actual card later but here's my 2023 bingo predictions

porn unbanned

another silly goofy show/musical theater production about slaveowners and/or serial killers because why not

t*ump faces actual consequence for once in his life

someone who knows gerard uses they/them and/or she/her pronouns for them

MCR INTERVIEW

MCR ALBUM

another star wars/marvel movie

barbie 2023 is epically good/terrible

barbie 2023 sparks a new gentleminons

one direction reunion

new social media to replace twitter

speak now taylors version

tumblr under threat

big supernatural occurrence confirmed (aliens? bigfoot?)

phoebe bridgers paul mescal breakup (bonus points for phoebe bridgers/bo burnham because i literally do not know what i would do w myself)

social media influencer actually goes to jail

brendon urie's child has a very unfortunate name (literally what goes well with 'urie' that poor child)

nfts banned somewhere (canada?)

starbucks unionization

some completely unrelated republican fuckshit happens on jan 6

famous unsolved murder solved (black dahlia, jack the ripper)

new disease

roe v wade restored

child of family vloggers writes an expose and laws are passed about it

my mom sold me to one direction netflix movie (but w a made-up band name) (it would be sick if one direction - see above prediction about their return - actually agreed to it though)

phoebe bridgers makes an new album and it ruins my life

i go to a concert

JEMILY

BYLER? (its been my hyperfixation for years gimme a break)

new unhinged plastic surgery

instagram subscription service

bare minimum 'activism' (black squares)

elon sells twitter

pete davidson + grimes

i get a good hairstyle for once

i make some new friends

new zine(s) :)

i figure out how to sell things online for i am an old man

i post some more of my writing/analysis/essays

identity crisis, name and/or pronouns change

[rancidmice]

ok so i made a playlist for wonderland

Listen to the whole thing on youtube here

Song list and some notes on specific tracks below. I wanted to tie in the themes of video gamey music, pop, hyperpop, and metalcore to create the vibe of wonderland while also moving through the journey of the arc and telling the story through the songs! It’s been a fun little project and I’m really happy with the result.

Wonderland: Round One- The Suffering Game OST

Death By Glamour- Undertale OST

-this one is basically the alternate title for this arc. also how could we not open with this to accomany our vogue elves?

Kill V. Maim- Grimes

-if you don’t like grimes because of the way she is (valid) you get a multifaceted approach to suffering in this playlist

FIGHT! Flyday Chinatown- Aests

-a neat summarization of the game space dynamic

Unite Synchronization- Homestuck OST

-i couldn’t not put some homestuck music in here because it fits so well with the video game electronic sound. also, this one is very teamwork oriented. they’re in the monster factory working together :)

Doritos & Fritos- 100 gecs

Scream (feat. ARISTOPHANES)- Grimes

-its the suffering game! here we start sonically heading toward the darker aspects of wonderland 

KILL ALL PREDATORS (feat. Zand)- Banshee

-“messed up? oh you wanna see messed up?” ... washing machine (and the rest of it all)

Wonderland: Round Two- The Suffering Game OST

Immaterial- Sophie

-“without my legs or my hair, without my genes or my blood, with no name and with no type of story, where do i live? tell me where do i exist?” the sacrifice wheel...

Mos Thoser- food house, Gupi & Fraxiom

-“POV: you’re an icon cause you’re me. think about how many people know they’re gay because of me” in the heart attack game. he’s taako? from TV?

Tobira wo Akete- ANZA

-by contrast to the first round this round is significantly less draining, we have the bonus round and the easy version of heart attack. things reset to not quite zero but a comfortable level of stability. 

Money- That Poppy

-again, if you don’t like poppy because of the way she is, you get extra suffering for free

Sburban Reversal- Homestuck OST

-we start to see the glitches!! things are not what they seem...

Bite Your Teeth- Poppy

-did you forget this was the suffering game? it’s been a nice respite. 

Wonderland: Round Three- The Suffering Game OST

Megalovania- Undertale OST

-boss rush! also, also this playlist would be NOTHING without megalovania.

Beautiful, Dirty, Rich- Lady Gaga

Phonky Town- Playaphonk

-this ones depression phonk

Pink Whitney- Scene Queen

Haunted- Laura Les

-POV: you’re Lup inside the umbrella

Death of a Predator- Banshee

-from the first note of this song you can tell that we’re in the endgame. it hurts now.

BLOODMONEY- Poppy

-”I now know what it feels like to have my soul ripped out from my body”... self explanatory

Black Hole - Green Sun- Homestuck OST

-arms outstretched through the destruction of wonderland exists here as one slow motion battle. everything happens at once. the guitar is mournful as the boys fight like theyve never fought before. everything hurts.

Waking Up In Vegas- Katy Perry

-wonderland is gone. the contestants emerge in a daze, blinking in the sunlight. it’s overcast in the clearing of the felicity wilds, but still so bright. how long were they playing? how long were they trapped? no one seems to remember.

[informative-blogger123]

Discover the Best Soap for Car Wash at Home

Ever wondered what the best soap for car wash at home is? Washing your car can feel like a daunting task, but with the right products and techniques, it becomes more than just a chore—it’s a moment of pride and satisfaction. Whether you’re a car enthusiast or just someone who wants to keep their vehicle shining like new, using the right car care products makes all the difference. So, grab your bucket, and let’s dive into the world of car detailing!

Why Does Using the Right Soap Matter?

Think about it—your car faces all kinds of weather, dirt, and debris daily. A regular household cleaner just won't cut it when it comes to keeping your paint job looking sharp. Using the best soap for a car wash at home not only removes dirt but also protects the finish. This ensures that your car not only looks good but also maintains its resale value for years to come.

The Best Soap for Car Wash at Home: What to Look For

When you're searching for car wash soap, it’s essential to find something that’s gentle yet effective. The best car care products will:

Be pH-balanced to avoid stripping wax or damaging the paint.

Offer a thick, sudsy formula that clings to dirt and lifts it away.

Contain ingredients that help maintain a sleek, glossy finish.

Look for soaps that are specifically labeled for automotive use. These products are formulated to clean your car without harming its delicate exterior.

Essential Car Care Products You Need

When you're setting up for a car wash, soap is just the beginning. If you want your vehicle to look pristine, you’ll need a few other essentials for car detailing. These include:

A Good Quality Car Wash Mitt: This is way better than an old rag or sponge. A microfiber mitt will lift dirt from the surface without scratching the paint.

Buckets for Washing and Rinsing: To avoid spreading dirt around, use a two-bucket system—one for soapy water and one for rinsing the mitt.

Microfiber Towels: These are perfect for drying your car without leaving streaks or scratches.

Wheel Cleaner: The wheels are often the dirtiest part of the car, so make sure you have a dedicated cleaner that can cut through brake dust and grime.

The Best Car Care Kit: Everything You Need in One Package

If you’re just starting your car detailing journey, it can feel overwhelming to figure out what products to buy. Thankfully, there are many car care kits available that include everything you need. These kits typically feature:

Car wash soap

Glass cleaner

Tire shine

Interior detailing cleaner

Wax or ceramic spray coating

One of the major benefits of a kit is that all the products are designed to work together. Plus, it’s a great way to save a bit of money while stocking up on essentials.

Professional Car Wash Kit: Is It Worth It?

If you want to go all out, consider investing in a professional car wash kit. These kits are similar to the consumer versions, but they usually include higher-quality products and tools used by professional detailers. You’ll get a longer-lasting shine and deeper clean with less effort. It’s an investment, but if you’re serious about keeping your car looking its best, it’s worth every penny.

Interior Detailing: The Unsung Hero of Car Care

While everyone loves a shiny exterior, the interior is where you spend the most time. Keeping it clean and smelling fresh not only enhances the driving experience but also helps maintain the car’s value.

Car Interior Detailing Cleaner: What Works Best?

When it comes to car interior detailing cleaner, there are a few different areas to focus on:

Dashboard and Console: Look for a cleaner that removes dust and fingerprints without leaving a greasy residue. Bonus points if it offers UV protection to prevent fading.

Upholstery and Carpet: For fabric interiors, a dedicated carpet cleaner can make a huge difference. For leather seats, make sure to use a cleaner and conditioner that keeps them supple and crack-free.

Glass Cleaner: Streaky windows are a big no-no. A good glass cleaner should remove smudges and leave your windows crystal clear.

Essentials for Car Detailing at Home

Whether you’re a detailing newbie or a seasoned pro, these essentials will elevate your car washing game:

Clay Bar: This is great for removing contaminants from the paint that soap alone can't handle.

Wax or Ceramic Spray Coating: After washing, apply a protective layer that enhances shine and shields your paint from the elements.

Detailing Brushes: These come in handy for cleaning vents, seams, and other hard-to-reach spots.

Foam Cannon: If you have access to a pressure washer, a foam cannon is an amazing tool that helps you cover your car in thick suds.

Ceramic Spray Coating: What You Need to Know

If you want a long-lasting shine, ceramic spray coating is the way to go. Unlike traditional waxes, which wear off after a few weeks, ceramic coatings bond to the car’s paint, providing months of protection and a high-gloss finish. It also repels water, meaning less time drying and fewer chances of water spots.

Ceramic coatings are a game-changer for car enthusiasts. They add a sleek, glossy look and protect your vehicle from UV rays, bird droppings, and harsh chemicals. While professional ceramic coatings can be costly, ceramic spray is an affordable option that still offers excellent protection.

How to Apply Ceramic Spray Coating

Applying ceramic spray coating is simple, even for beginners. Here’s a quick guide:

Start by thoroughly washing and drying your car.

Apply the ceramic spray to a small section of your car.

Use a microfiber towel to spread the coating evenly.

Buff the area with a clean microfiber towel until it shines.

The result? A car that looks as good, if not better, than the day you drove it off the lot.

Why You Need a Car Detailing Kit

Investing in a car detailing kit is the easiest way to ensure you have everything you need for a professional-grade wash. Whether you're tackling your car's exterior or giving the interior some much-needed attention, these kits come packed with products that make the job easier. Plus, having a dedicated kit encourages you to keep up with regular cleaning, preventing dirt and grime from building up over time.

Car Detailing: It’s More Than Just Cleanliness

Car detailing isn’t just about making your vehicle look good. It’s about protecting your investment. Regular washing and detailing can extend the life of your car’s paint, upholstery, and other surfaces. It’s also a great way to catch potential problems, like chips or cracks in the paint, before they become major issues.

Best Practices for Car Detailing at Home

Here are a few tips to keep in mind when detailing your car at home:

Work in the shade: Sunlight can cause water and products to dry too quickly, leaving behind streaks.

Use separate towels for different areas: This prevents cross-contamination and ensures that dirt from one part of the car doesn't scratch another.

Start from the top down: This way, dirt from the upper parts of the car doesn’t drip onto clean surfaces below.

Maintaining Your Car Between Washes

While washing your car regularly is important, there are a few ways you can maintain that showroom shine between washes. A quick spray of detailing spray or waterless wash can remove light dust and keep your car looking fresh. Also, don't forget about the wheels! Keeping them clean can make a huge difference in the overall appearance of your vehicle.

The Benefits of Using the Best Soap for Car Wash at Home

By now, you’re probably convinced that using the best soap for car wash at home can significantly improve your car's appearance. It not only helps remove dirt but also protects your car's paint, prevents rust, and enhances the shine. Pair this with the right car care products, and you’ll be turning heads on every drive.

Conclusion

Detailing your car doesn’t have to be reserved for the pros. With the right tools, including the best car care kit, interior detailing cleaners, and ceramic spray coatings, you can achieve professional results right at home. So, why not treat your car to a spa day? It deserves it!

FAQs

Q1: What is the best soap for car wash at home? A: Look for a pH-balanced soap specifically formulated for cars. This ensures a gentle yet effective clean that won’t damage your car's finish.

Q2: Can I use dish soap to wash my car? A: No, dish soap can strip your car's protective wax and dull the paint. Always use a soap designed for automotive use.

Q3: How often should I wash my car? A: Ideally, you should wash your car every two weeks, but this can vary depending on weather conditions and how often you drive.

Q4: Is ceramic spray coating worth it? A: Absolutely! It provides long-lasting protection and a high-gloss finish, making it a great alternative to traditional waxing.

Q5: What should be included in a car care kit? A: A good kit will include soap, glass cleaner, tire cleaner, wax or ceramic spray, and microfiber towels.

[gertlushgaming]

PowerWash Simulator Review (Steam)

PowerWash Simulator Review, Release the Pressure with PowerWash Simulator! Wash away your worries with the soothing sounds of high-pressure water. Fire up your power washer and blast away every speck of dirt and grime you can find, all with the simple satisfaction of power-washing to a sparkling finish.

PowerWash Simulator Review Pros:

- Decent graphics. - 9.03GB Download size. - Steam achievements. - Full controller support. - Graphics settings - graphics quality preset, resolution, display screen, v-sync, HDR, texture quality, fullscreen mode, target frame rate, anti-aliasing, render scale, shadow distance, shadow resolution, shadows, washing mode, and wetness VFX. - Controller settings - Invert axis and sensitivity sliders, can remap controls. - Mouse and keyboard support with the ability to Invert mouse axis and sensitivity sliders along with the ability to remap. - Cross-play support. - Cleaning stuff gameplay. - Tutorial menu. - Press a button to show the dirt left. - A percentage bar fills up as you clean. - You earn money from cleaning everything but the money is given to you broken down by part. - Each cleanable part has a progress bar that goes down until it makes a ding flash to indicate it is done. - Very easy to get into. - The game is very soothing and a good turn your brain off and play the game. - Four modes to play - career, bonus jobs, free play, and challenge mode. - Two-player Co-op support. - Play how you want. - Buy and equip new outfits and gloves. - First-person view. - A full 3D world with 360-degree camera control through movement. - Challenges are either against the clock or you have a water limit, you can choose to do locations or vehicles. - Earn stars from cleaning jobs and stars unlock new gear and bonus jobs. - When you get past 99 percent you have a list of three items that still need cleaning. - Free play lets you pick any finished job and take it on again with no restraints. - Free DLC for some new jobs from Xmas themed to FINAL Fantasy and Tomb Raider. - The ship is split into five categories - power washers, equipment, cleaning liquids, clothing, and modifications. - You can rotate nozzles, and add new nozzles and it is all straightforward to do. - Very accessible. - This game should be on the NHS as it helps chill you out and calm you down. - Highly addictive. PowerWash Simulator Review Cons: - Causes hand cramps. (more an FYI) - The liquids you buy run out very quickly. - Menus are not always clear. - Doesnt offer cross-save with the other versions. - Liquids are not always readily available. - Some of the locations are not that fun to do. - When you get to 99 percent it can be hard to find anything to clean to trigger the final three missing items to clean. - On some objects, it can be annoying when you don't know what the part is that needs cleaning. Related Pros: Slave Zero X Review (Steam) PowerWash Simulator: Official website. Developer: FuturLab Publisher: SQUARE ENIX Store Links - Steam Read the full article

[sharkrocket]

Just wanted to say absolutely LOVING all the patho stuff lately. Would love to know, who’s your favourite characters and why? Perhaps a top 3? (Or more if you feel like talking more? :)))

OOHHH, thank you! I'm having a fun time with it, so I'm glad people here are liking the nonsense my brain is conjuring up ahaha

So, a bit of a disclaimer, my partner is the one playing the games since I don't have time to play myself, and they've only gone through Classic Bachelor and Haruspex route so far (they plan on playing Clara's route, Patho 2, and Marble Nest, it's just gonna be a while). We're aware of some of the characterization changes in P2, but we haven't dug into the nuances yet, so, that said, some of my rationale for liking these characters is gonna be a blend of my understanding of the two versions of these game and some inevitable characterization bleed from all the fanfics I've been consuming, so things are going to be WILDLY INACCURATE. Not to mention my feelings towards certain characters could change as my knowledge about them changes, SO THERE'S ALL THAT

1. Artemy 

I just really like me a big strong farmboy bear man who can do a punch, steal organs, is covered in blood, dirt and grime all the time, has a big ol' kangaroo pouch, many pockets, and has bull imagery attached. IDK MAN, his characterization is very relatable and good to me, he's grounded, he's focused, he's practical and he still has time to have a sense of humor and be sarcastic. And I tend to have a fondness for dad-type characters too so that's just a big bonus. He's obviously very clever, and I enjoy the fact he doesn't feel compelled to shove his intelligence in everyone's face. But when he DOES decide to whip out a checkmate, it's just [mwah] chef's kiss

I also appreciate that his characterization allows for him to struggle with his role in life and his place within the Kin, it's really compelling to me. Like one day he's just doing his studies and not even a full day later, he comes back to a town he hasn't been to in 10 years, he finds out that his dad has been killed, that HE'S being accused of being the murderer, his friend BELIEVES it, and after all that, he's expected to take on a role that he inherited from his father that he may or may not be ready for, so, needless to say, that is QUITE the burden he has to shoulder. It makes me wonder if this is what he really wants, or if this is all he's really known because his people are relying on him, and if he can't do it, who can?

God, and then there's like the whole question of weather or not if he even feels like he belongs with the Kin considering his heritage and the time he spent away from them. And he has such a such a low opinion of himself, YOU'RE HANDSOME AND CAPABLE ARTEMY, ITS OKAY!!! And then after all that, his story arc is about love, and I'm just [CLUTCHES FIST], I have so many emotions, I love this guy

2. Daniil 

This dramatic bitch with his black/red snake motif. When me and my partner found out that his P2 design has a SNAKE BELT BUCKLE, the noises we made, I swear to god. I hate this guy (affectionate). Mr. Platform Boots and stupid asymmetrical coat that I refuse to draw his dumb collars for because I hate them so much

OKAY OKAY, I enjoy making fun of him (a lot), but there's a lot I like about him too

https://www.tumblr.com/threehealers/696519548922462208/i-think-daniil-is-the-sexiest-sort-of-mad

I guess I do enjoy the fact that he’s supposed to be some sort of ~handsome celebrity city scientist~ He’s ambitious, he’s a fighter with self-destructive tendencies (love a tragic character with self-destructive tendencies), good with a gun, and the image of him going completely feral is very attractive. He’s very fun to draw 

I also really like that he just DOES NOT STOP FIGHTING against authority. Like his goal is to defeat death. RIGHT OFF THE BAT nature is like “you can’t, that’s impossible” and Daniil is over here like “Who are YOU to tell me what can and cannot defy the laws of nature” and that just sets the scene for his characterization. He meets the Powers That Be and immediately wants to throw hands and I love that a lot. This man will not be jerked around like some puppet to the whims of higher authority!!!!! 

3. Stickyson

I’m fond of the Patho kids but there’s something about Sticky that’s really hilarious to me, especially the Classic version of him. This kid is out here looting houses and getting upset that he’s getting left out of the gang war. Daniil tells him to stay inside and he listens DUTIFULLY (a good son) except for that time he went out to watch some guys punch each other because he just could not resist. A rascal, truly up to some lad activities 

I don’t fully understand his Patho 2 characterization yet, but I AM aware that he has ambitions to become a healer or a doctor of some sort, and I’m very fond of those ambitions. A smart kid with a good head on his shoulders 

4. Rubin

I also don’t really understand Rubin particularly well, but I respect a tall giant guy who’s a qualified doctor that dresses like THAT (the classic outfit). And his pure hatred for Artemy for those first couple of days, there was something particularly funny about that. And that he just casually drops that he liquefied the patriarch alive??? There’s some good moments there

All that to say, I took the “Which Patho Character Are You” quiz and I got Rubin. My partner did it and they got Eva. I have the most fondness for Artemy, and they have the most fondness for Daniil so make of that what you will 

[looneyllesbian]

my ptp playlist

Sit / Stay - Poppy

Concrete - Poppy

I Disagree - Poppy

Cry - Ashnikko (ft. Grimes)

I Can’t Decide - Scissor Sisters

Choke - IDKHOW

Choke (acoustic) - IDKHOW

Brutal - Olivia Rodrigo

fear of dying - Poppy

Circus - Britney Spears

Icicles - The Scary Jokes

Tantrum - Ashnikko

Her - Poppy

If It Bleeds - Poppy

Bleep Bloop - Poppy

Khaos x4 - Poppy

Kill V. Maim - grimes

Mind Brand - MARETU

Love Me, Love Me, Love Me - Kikuo

Hey Kids (feat. Late Verlane) - Molina

ART IS DEAD - bo burnham

Violent - caroles daughter

Baby Hotline - Jack Stauber

Nowhere To Run - Stegosaurus Rex

Devil Town - Cavetown

SUCK IT UP - MARETU

Scary Mask (feat. FEVER 333) - Poppy

I Can’t Handle Change - Roar

Poor Grammar - Roar

Смерти Больше Нет - IC3PEAK

Panic Room - Au/Ra

There’s Something Happening - Jack Stauber

Blow My Brains Out - Tikkle Me

Freak Show - Punkinloveee, H3artcrush

We Will Commit Wolf Murder - of Montreal

Carousel - Melanie Martinez

Mad Hatter - Melanie Martinez

Take A Slice - Glass Animals

Echo - Crusher-P

Worldwide Torture - Jazmin Bean

Hello Kitty - Jazmin Bean

Are You Satisfied? - MARINA

Hermit the Frog - MARINA

The Outsider - MARINA

Rät - Penelope Scott

Molly - Mindless Self Indulgence

The Distortionist - Ghost and Pals

i can see clearly - Lil Darkie

Give It Up - Victorious Cast, Elizabeth Gilles, Ariana Grande

Welcome to the Internet - Bo Burnham

All Eyes On Me - Bo Burnham

I Feel Like A God - DeathbyRomy

Interlude: I’m Not Angry Anymore - Paramore

Freaks - Surf Cruise

You Are An Idiot! - CristianMirror

Easy on You - Sir Chloe

Lessen The Damage - Poppy

Out of Her Head - korban baxter

bonus: my funny pets playlist

Using You - Mars Argo (first version)

I Kissed A Girl - Katy Perry

Violent - carolesdaughter

Prom Queen - Beach Bunny

[nerdypanda3126]

*slides in like she hasn't kept forgetting this* For your 250 for 250 (CONGRATS BY THE WAY YOU AWESOME NERD~ 🖤🖤🖤)...washing the other's hair? Lukanette? Possibly even...if you're so inclined...PwF!verse? 👀

Thank you so much for the congrats and the prompt, Ver!! 😊 I wrote a little bonus scene for Playing with Fire. It takes place a little bit after Chapter 7 when they leave the tower. Hope you like it!!

15. Washing the other's hair (PwF version)

Marinette leaned over the spring they'd found that flowed beautifully clear and clean out of an outcrop of rocks that stood about shoulder height for her. She didn't want to think about how long it'd been since she'd had a chance to wash… anything, really, but especially her hair that she'd tied up in a bun to keep it away from her face and neck. She let it fall now, shaking it out and running her fingers through it, wincing as they snagged on terrible knots. Surely Luka wouldn't mind a small pit stop.

In fact, as she glanced over at him, he seemed transfixed, but he moved as she bent down and it made her pause.

"Can… can I?" he asked with another hesitant step forward.

They hadn't talked much about their moment in the library, or had any time to address the changing nature of their relationship, but his shy admission that he wanted to help her with this small domestic task made her blush as she nodded.

The water was cold, but his hands were warm and gentle as he started scooping the water over her head and rubbing it into her scalp, working away the grime that had built up from the dusty roads before he moved down to tease the knots out.

She knew now why he'd hummed when she'd been cutting his hair; his touch behind her ears and lingering on the back of her neck was making her shiver—and not from the cold.

This was written for my 250 for 250 Celebration!

[bubblestheraccoon]

Music Mixes

Lumberjanes “Arts and Crafts” Program Field

Treble Maker Badge

“Some Risks are worth the Reward”

Music fuels the mind and thus fuels creativity. A creative mind has the ability to make discoveries and create innovations. The greatest minds and thinkers like Hildegard von Bingen, Barbra Strozzi, and Florence Mary Taylor all had something in common in that they were constantly exploring their imagination and creativity. As a Lumberjane it will be vital that we not only enrich our minds, but enrich those around us. Music is just one of the many mediums that can create an empowering environment, it is one of the few mediums that can be enjoyed at any time.

Finch’s Notes:

This post is based on a section from the bonus content from Lumberjanes: To The Max Edition Volume One. I did not create these playlist, their titles, or the blurb at the top of the post. If any of the links are wrong or broken, or if I should add any more disclaimers for song content, please feel free to let me know!

*D-Slur Warning.

**Only version of the cover I could find on youtube, here’s a version of song without the extra audio but it’s on a Russian website that overwrote my adblocker a little bit so visit it at your own risk. Here’s the song it was covering if you want that instead.

***Could not find cover on youtube. Link instead goes to band camp.

****F-Slur Warning.

Fox Fight Jams! By April!

Edge of Seventeen by Stevie Nicks

Bad Reputation by Joan Jett

Run the World (Girls) by Beyonce

Northshore be Tegan & Sara

Woo Hoo by The 5 6 7 8s

Wilderness by Sleater-Kinney

Wolf by Now, Now

Spin Around by Josie and the Pussycats

Buffy the Vampire Slayer Theme

Jet Pack by Dog Party

Pirates by Jenny Owen Youngs

Dance Apocalyptic by Janelle Monae

Bamboo Bones by Against Me!

Push It by Salt-n-Pepa

I Knew You Were Trouble by Taylor Swift

Up All Night by One Direction

Roar by Katy Perry

Eye Of The Tiger by Survivor

Say You'll Be There by the Spice Girls

Ribs by Lorde

Edge of Seventeen by Stevie Nicks (”Best Song Ever”-April)

River Adventure Mix of dooooom by Mal

I Was An Island by Allison Weiss

Shark In The Water by V.V. Brown

Let's Submerge by X-Ray Spex

Eyes Open by The Gossip

Rebel Girl by Bikini Kill*

Giant Kitty by Shonen Knife

I Won't Follow by the Secret Someones

4Ever by The Veronicas

Sk8er Boi by Avril Lavigne

Take Me Away by Fefe Dobson

Borne On The FM Waves by Against Me! & Tegan Quinn

Ain't It Fun by Paramore

3 Small Words by Josie and the Pussycats

Anchor by Letters To Cleo

That's Not My Name by The Ting Tings

Independent Woman Part 1 by Destiny's Child

Crush by the Sleigh Bells

Oh! by Sleater-Kinney

Tropical by Plumtree

Rhiannon by Best Coast or Fleetwood Mac 

The Con by Tegan & Sara

The Competition by Kimya Dawson

Cave Tunes by Molly

I Have Confidence by Julie Andrews

Ain’t No Mountain High Enough by Marvin Gaye & Tammi Terrell

Tightrope by Janelle Monae feat Big Boi

Just A Dream by Taylor Swift

Heartbreak Dream by Betty Who

Corner of the Sky by the Jackson 5

Valerie by Amy Winehouse

I Wanna Dance With Somebody by Whitney Houston

Call Your Girlfriend by Robyn

Let It Go by Idina Menzel

Build Me Up Buttercup by The Foundations

Ring of Fire by Johnny Cash

Jolene by Dolly Parton

Rock ‘n Roll High School by Shonen Knife

Don’t Save Me by HAIM

The Cave by Dia Frampton**

She Keeps Me Warm by Mary Lambert

This Is For by Ingrid Michaelson

Cut It Off by Mal Blum

Smash Into You by Beyonce

Jen’s Perfect Camp Mix by Ripley

Gravity Falls Theme Song

Summertime by Audra McDonald

Strong Enough by Kina Grannis

(You’re So Square) Baby, I Don’t Care by Cee Lo Green

Waterfalls - TLC

Just A Girl by No Doubt

Nobody Knows Me At All by The Weepies

I’m Beginning To See The Light by Ella Fitzgerald

Bad Girls by M.I.A.

Spice Up Your Life by the Spice Girls

Magic To Do by Patina Miller & Ensemble

***Flawless by Beyonce

Come On by Josie And The Pussycats

Don’t Stop Believin’ by Journey

Here Comes The Sun by The Beatles

Jo’s really rad! Mix by Jo

Star Trek: Deep Space Nine Theme

Androgynous(Live) by Joan Jett and Against Me!

Tous Les Memes by Stromae

Sunshine by Rye Rye feat M.I.A.

L.E.S. Artistes by Santigold

What About Your Friends by TLC

Just One Of The Guys by Jenny Lewis

Melody by Kate Earl

Red Cape by Priscilla Ahn

No Wow by The Kills

I Found You by Tilly and the Wall

Do You Remember the Morning by Kid in the Attic***

Cheerleader by St. Vincent

Concrete Wall by Zee Avi

You Can Count On Me by Panda Bear

Go Your Own Way by Fleetwood Mac (”<3″-Jo)

Don’t You (Forget About Me) by Simple Minds

Ziggy Stardust by David Bowie

Oblivion by Grimes

Q.U.E.E.N. by Janelle Monae and Eryka Badu

Rapid Decompression by Against Me!

Roanokes Rule: The Mix[!][!][!] by April

Rattlesnake by Saint Vincent

Transgender Dysphoria Blues by Against Me!****

Amazon by M.I.A.

Another One Bites The Dust by Queen

Art-I-Ficial by X-Ray Spex

Separate Rooms by Now, Now

What’s Mine Is Yours by Sleater-Kinney

Sci-Fi Wasabi by Cibo Matto

Tennis Court by Lorde

Son Of A Preacher Man by Dusty Springfield

Dreams by Fleetwood Mac

Desire Lines by Deerhunter

Hot and Cold by Ex Hex

White Daisy Passing by Rocky Votolato

Misguided Ghosts by Paramore

For The Best by Gregory and the Hawk

The Hymn Of Acxiom by Vienna Teng

Capture The Flag by Broken Social Scene

From A Shell by Lisa Germano

Rosie’s Turn

Feeling Good by Nina Simone

Annabelle Lee by Sarah Jarosz

Terrible Things by April Smith & The Great Picture Show

You Can’t Be Told by Valerie June

Wild Geese Blues by Gladys Bentley

The Day Is Short by Jearlyn Steele

One Dime Blues by Etta Baker

Hard Way Home by Brandi Carlile

The Devil’s Paintbrush Road by The Wailin’ Jennys

To The Bone by Okou

Panic Cord by Gabrielle Aplin

Cups (You’re Gonna Miss Me) by Lulu and the Lampshades

Crayola Doesn’t Make A Color For Your Eyes by Kristin Andreassen

Complimentary Me by Elizabeth & The Catapult

Blue Spotted Tail by Kina Grannis

Sorry About The Doom by Slow Club

You Know I’m No Good by Amy Winehouse

From Texas: Big “D” by Julie Andrews & Carol Burnett

Finch’s Notes Cont:

Hi! I made this post to avoid work. But mostly I made this post because Lumberjanes is something really important to me, and these playlist are a part of my enjoyment of Lumberjanes I don’t see people talking about a lot! So I decided to make a post in order to share them with y’all. I remember hunching over my phone making a spotify playlist (here, though it’s missing a few songs that aren’t on spotify) while on a trip to California in the summer of 2018 when I first got into Lumberjanes. I probably listened to these songs while I made my first ever Lumberjanes fanart. These mixes helped me to discover artist I really love, like Janelle Monae and Mal Blum. I hope you enjoy them as well!

Other notes: Sk8r Boi is crossed out as that is the way it appears on Mal’s playlist. Also, I tend to shy away from music videos as a personal preference, so that’s why there are so few included on this playlist, though I’m sure many of these songs have beautiful music videos. I might reblog this post in the future with some youtube playlists of these mixes, but if you want to find them yourself there are a lot of playlists of these songs made on youtube already! Or you can make your own playlists using this post. 

And, just for fun, have one final Lumberjanes themed music recommendation:

Lumberjanes by Various

[taste-in-music]

taste-in-music’s Year End Wrap-Up

Hello everybody! We’ve finally reached the end of 2020. While I’m glad to leave this miserable year behind, one of things that undeniably got me through it was the vast amount of awesome music we got. In past years I’ve made favorite album and EP lists, but this time around I’m going to tackle them all in one go, giving reviews on the projects that had some significances to me over the course of the year. I’m going to make a post for my favorite songs too, so keep an eye out for that in coming days. Now, without further ado, let’s get started, shall we?

folklore by Taylor Swift: This was an incredible year of growth for Taylor Swift. As much as I’ve enjoyed her past music, the way she constantly felt the need to address what people thought of her always irked me, (though after watching her documentary, I do understand why she did it.) It wasn’t Taylor Swift the public persona that was most interesting, I thought. It was Taylor Swift the artist, the songwriter, the storyteller. What I wanted was an album focused on that. This year, I got one, (well... more on that later,) and it’s my favorite project she’s ever done. The tales Swift spins on folklore span across love triangles, heiresses, and battlefields, and she nails each and every one. While the chilly indie-folk influence from the likes of Aaron Dessner and Justin Vernon is prominent, Swift’s warmth and charisma always cuts through the fog like a beam of sunlight. So yeah, this is my undeniable album of the year.

Fetch The Bolt Cutters by Fiona Apple: I only started listening to Fiona Apple last year and had thoroughly enjoyed her music, but this album cemented her as one of my favorite songwriters and performers of all time. Everything about Fetch The Bolt Cutters is so idiosyncratic yet fits together in just the right way, like watching an entire house being dropped from the sky and falling perfectly into place. It is a testament to the creative process, emotional honesty, and breaking free from all the cages you may find yourself in, whether they be societal, personal, or those of your own making. And in a year that was so isolating, it felt like Apple was whispering everything I needed to hear right into my ear, just when I needed it. In short, my boltcutters have been motherfucking fetched. 

Punisher by Phoebe Bridgers: When Punisher was announced, I had no clue how Phoebe Bridgers would match the quality of Stranger In The Alps. Upon first listen, I wasn’t sure she had. By the fifteenth time I was listening to this album and every lyric was hitting like Cupid’s arrow to the jugular, I knew she’d surpassed it. Punisher presents a sonic scope that both comforts and crushes all at once, like with the upbeat yet mournful horns on “Kyoto” or the cathartic swell on standout “I Know The End.” In my opinion, Bridgers is one of the greatest songwriters of our generation in the making, and I can’t wait to see what the future brings for her. She may know the end, but she’s far from it. 

SAWAYAMA by Rina Sawayama: This is the album I see becoming a new shorthand for the true potential of pop excellence, a cult hit that never got its time to shine but is beloved by pop music geeks to the ends of the earth, like EMOTION by Carly Rae Jepsen. SAWAYAMA so effortlessly blends diverse genres and influences like disco, nu metal, and arena rock, and it yet it remains cohesive due to Rina Sawayama’s sheer strength as a performer. She deserves a spot on the pop girlie hierarchy, and one near the top. 

Future Nostalgia by Dua Lipa: I really enjoyed Dua Lipa’s debut album, but even I didn’t expect her to come through with such a fully realized, consistent, downright fantastic follow up. Future Nostalgia is a pop album that feels studied, like Lipa did her research of pop’s past as she made it. The result is an album that synthesizes several different sounds under her vision, one that is always trained ahead, and it simply slaps. In a perfect world, nearly every song on this album got spun off into a hit single. 

evermore by Taylor Swift: 2020 was already my year of listening to Taylor Swift, (I went through her whole discography, cultivated a favorites playlist, and at the end of the year I was in the top 2% of her yearly Spotify listeners.) evermore was a lovely cherry to top it all off. While folklore enchanted me with its stories, evermore captivated me with its melodies. I haven’t been able to get snippets of this album out. of. my. head. for weeks now. It’s a bit less consistent than it’s older sister, (and likely to live in its shadow,) but there is still so much to love. 

I’m Allergic to Dogs! by Remi Wolf: This EP is so much goddamn fun. It’s a blend of many different sounds, indie pop, electronic, maybe hip hop, I think reggae at points? It’s such a colorful, textured, quirky listen bristling with energy and undeniable hooks. “Woo!” conquered my Summer, and months later the bridge of “Photo ID” conquered TikTok. Keep your eye out for Remi Wolf in the coming year, she’s going to make a big splash. 

Good At Being Young by Charli Adams: Good At Being Young was the first EP this year that I could not get enough of. It drifts through dreamy indie-pop sounds, with melancholic guitars and cloudy synths, and Adams has a deep vocal timbre that delivers tales of adolescent tribulations with just the right amount of wistfulness. Overall, it builds the perfect soundscape for a late-night drive.

Cape God by Allie X: Allie X has been keeping us FED with content. It seems like only yesterday that Super Sunset came out, and yet her output remains impressively consistent. This album has impressive highs, some lower moments, but the danceability, duets, and enticing darkness under its shiny pop veneer make it a record you won’t want to skip. 

La vita nuova by Christine and The Queens: Perhaps the biggest flex of 2020 was Christine and The Queens dropping a fantastic EP and accompanying short film right out of the gate. The grooves on this are infectious, wiry, and air-tight, (the Caroline Polachek feature was another added bonus,) but that doesn’t mean there isn’t plenty of emotional weight too. 

Lighter by Donna Missal: This was one of my most anticipated albums of the year, and it’s hard to determine whether it disappointed or not. I think the only thing holding Lighter back is that This Time was such a formative album for me, (my favorite of 2018, to the uninitiated.) In fact, this album flows way better than This Time, more cohesive with its storytelling and more consistent in folk-rock sound. And, of course, Donna Missal’s vocals stun on both the bangers and the ballads. 

SURF by BLACKSTARKIDS: There was no record this year that was more instantly likeable than this one. The blend of low-fi indie pop and hip hop makes for a whirlwind of sunny fun and youthful malaise that would make the perfect soundtrack for a road trip to the beach. Standouts include the opening track “SOUNDS LIKE FUN,” the chill “WIGS,” and blissful title track “MUSIC TO SURF TO.”

The Baby by Samia: I’ve had my eye on Samia since “Milk” dropped years ago. Seeing her live sparked my belief that she was an indie darling in the making, and The Baby confirmed that she definitely was. The lyrics on this album mix quiet contemplation with just enough sardonic wit and raw emotion throughout a varied selection of sunny rock bops and gut wrenching ballads. If you enjoyed Punisher, then I can’t recommend this enough.

Season 2 by Nasty Cherry: Nasty Cherry is a group that I will not stop rooting for. Their EP from last year showed their potential for nailing monster hooks, but this sophomore effort shows just how versatile they can be. This EP covers everything from Dylan Brady produced hyperpop to early-2000s reminiscent pop rock to emotional balladry, and they pull it all off flawlessly. 

A Little Rhythm and a Wicked Feeling by Magdalena Bay: This album became a fast favorite way late in the year, there is such a sweetness to Magdalena Bay’s music that makes it stick in your brain like a piece of blue raspberry bubblegum. This EP is spacey, catchy, and filled with electronic synthpop mastery, with countless catchy hooks that’ll make you feel like drifting and dancing all at once.

Miss Anthropocene by Grimes: The bubblegum bombast of Art Angels fully redefined my taste in pop years ago, so I was fascinated to see how Grimes would follow it up. On Miss Anthropocene, she leans into darker, more industrial textures, but also anchors it back to Earth with acoustic touches and some of her most introspective lyrics to date. Grimes painted a version of a world on the brink of disaster on this album, a picture that was hypnotically beautiful. And in a year where the word was a certified disaster, that was strangely comforting.

Plastic Hearts by Miley Cyrus: I’ve been wanting Miley to go rock for so goddamn long, Plastic Hearts was bound to make this list by pure validation alone. But what can I say? This breed of glossy 80s rock suits Cyrus’s rougher voice so well! I hope she stays in this lane a bit longer, but as we know, she’s one of pop’s most chameleonic figures. Only time will tell. 

Where Does The Devil Hide by Zella Day: I have been patiently awaiting new Zella Day music ever since getting hooked on Kicker back in 2017, so this was one of my most anticipated releases of the year. This EP sounds nothing like Kicker, and I couldn’t be happier. It shows Day leaning even more into her influences from the past, (the 60s/70s vibes are intense with this one,) but also breathing a refreshing new life into them. 

SOUL LADY by Yukika: When I imagine the ideal of pop music, what it would sound like in a perfect world, this is what it sounds like. SOUL LADY is full of pristine, glossy production and catchy hooks that feel like they’ve come down from the clouds. I’ll admit that I can have trouble forming a connection with music when I don’t understand the lyrics, (it’s something I’m working on,) but this album cleared that hurdle with ease. If you’re curious about city pop or K-pop this is a great place to start. 

Heaven Is Without You by Love You Later: Give me lush pop production and heartbroken lyrics finished off with a heaping helping of nostalgia and I’ll eat it up with a spoon. Love You Later has been feeding my addiction to this genre for years, and this latest helping is particularly sweet. 

IN A DREAM by Troye Sivan: Troye Sivan has always supplied the bops, but it was about time that he started experimenting with his sound a little bit more. This EP offers some harder-hitting electronic textures, but also the addictive hooks that’ll keep you coming back for more.

Ungodly Hour by Chloe X Halle: These women are so TALENTED! If there is any word I’d use to describe this album it would be “effortless,” the harmonies, grooves, and chemistry between Chloe and Halle feels so natural and free-flowing. Charisma just rolls off of them in droves, I see full-blown stardom and several Grammys in their future.

Watching You by Robinson: This EP was one of the first on this list to arrive this year, and it still hits months later. Robinson’s confessional lyrics work wonders over the buoyant pop grooves, and “Don’t Say” remains one of the best pop songs of recent years. 

Manic by Halsey: I respect Halsey for dipping her toes into a myriad of different genres, (synth pop, rock, hip hop, and acoustic balladry,) but it does make for a jumbled listening experience. Still, I appreciate that this album features some of Halsey’s strongest tracks and writing to date, offering greater experimentation and emotional imtimacy than album’s past. 

We Don’t Stop by Aly & AJ: Should this count? It’s more a compilation of their past EP and singles... I don’t care, I’m counting it because there’s some new stuff too. This is an excellent display of Aly & AJ’s pop prowess in recent years, the hooks, vocal chemistry, and shimmery production are undeniable. 

Under My Influence by The Aces: The Aces returned in 2020 with a more laid-back, groovier record than their debut, exploring a wider variety of sounds. They’re as magnetic and likeable a group as ever, each member giving it their all, but I think I’ll return to the debut more often. 

Strangers/Lovers by Dagny: I’ve been anticipating a longer Dagny project, as she’s been drip-feeding us singles for a while now. This was a lot of fun, with Dagny pairing her upbeat earnestness with stories of romantic tribulation. While the hooks aren’t as memorable as her past offerings, there is still so much to enjoy. Lead single “Come Over” and “Let Me Cry” are my favorites.

DUALITY by Tatiana Hazel: I came across this via recommendation on Tik Tok and it’s a solid pop record! The music is swooning, synthy, and tinged with disco and Latin influence. The record doesn’t waste a second of its runtime, clocking in at less than half an hour and grooving the whole time.

After Hours by The Weeknd: The sonic palette of After Hours is so engaging, a neon-drenched blend of synthwave, electropop, and R&B. I’ve always felt lukewarm on The Weeknd’s musical persona of brooding, villainous party monster, so the strongest moments on this album tend to be when he subverts that in some way. Still, in full, this album is an undeniable force of smash hits, stadium-shaking ballads, and cinematic flair. I can’t wait for his Super Bowl performance. 

Petrol Bloom by LAUREL: It’s no secret that this year was chock-full of 80s revival albums (there’s what, five others on this list?) LAUREL wasn’t an artist I was expecting to go in that direction after the brooding folk pop of her debut album, but her deeper timbre works great alongside the synthy soundscapes. 

positions by Ariana Grande: I’ve just come to expect that nearly all of Ariana Grande’s albums are going to be growers to me. My first listen to positions was underwhelming, but the songs have grown on me more and more. This album feels like being let in on a giggly, fun slumber party with Grande and her friends. I wouldn’t call this her strongest album by far, and while I tend to prefer when she favors the more powerful parts of her range, (and her enunciations could still use some work,) there is a lot of good material here. 

THE ALBUM by BLACKPINK: We may just have to stan. I checked this out after watching their Netflix documentary, and while this breed of cacophonous, in-your-face electropop isn’t something I can listen to all the time, the hooks and charisma are undeniable. It certainly makes me feel like a bad bitch whenever I’m working out. 

Kid Krow by Conan Gray: Conan Gray burst onto my radar offering dreamy tracks rich with teen malaise and suburban restlessness, and a good amount of that initial appeal carries over onto this album. Kid Krow has both a larger instrumental scope and more stripped-back moments. In the end, it still feels like Gray is finding his voice as an artist, but he's giving up great bops to jam out to as he does.

Petals For Armor by Hayley Williams: Hayley Williams is one of my favorite vocalists, so seeing her venture out for a solo project was exciting. This album offers a mixed bag of danceable jams, emotive moments that showcase Williams’s powerful voice, and a few skips. But overall it showcases Williams’s strength as a performer as she tackles her past with vulnerability and versatility.

Apart by LÉON: Oh, man. This one was kind of disappointing. For context, LÉON’s self-titled debut was my favorite album of last year. This follow-up is by no means bad, but every song on her first album was instantly memorable. This one, not so much. LÉON’s vocals are beautiful, and there are some stand-out tracks, but I don’t see myself returning to this nearly as much. 

Blush by Maya Hawke: Maya Hawke’s Blush was to my 2020 what Tōth’s Practice Magic and Seek Professional Help When Necessary was to my 2019, (and that makes sense, as they’ve collaborated in the past.) This album is so blissful and nonchalant, and Maya Hawke has a gentle, soothing voice that feels wise beyond her years. While the writing isn’t as hard-hitting as, say, the Phoebe Bridgers album, sometimes I just want to listen to something that could rock me off into a dream world. If you like folksy, down-to-earth ballads, you’ve got a solid collection of them right here. 

Dedicated Side B by Carly Rae Jepsen: Of course Queen Carly would pull through with B-sides for Dedicated, did we expect anything less? Jepsen’s brand of controlled yet carefree shimmery poptimism drenched in 80s nostalgia that never fails to put me in a good mood. This album has some lusher, more tropical instrumentation than Dedicated proper, but works great alongside it.

Missing Person by Kelsy Karter: To the Plastic Hearts fans out there, your homework now is to give this record a listen. This rock album presents pop hooks, but a lot of reckless rock fun too. Kelsy Karter has so much irresistible swagger and carefree spirit as a performer, speeding through the emotional highs and lows like she’s burning rubber in a cherry red Cadillac. 

how i’m feeling now by Charli XCX: I’ll admit, this album was a bit abrasive to me on first listen. But tracks like “anthems” and “forever” made me return, and it’s a huge grower. If you listen closely, you’ll find the sugary-sweet hooks and relatable sentiments nestled deep in the crunchy hyperpop textures, begging to be discovered and eventually loved. 

Jaguar by Victoria Monét: If you enjoyed positions, then check out the debut from one of that album’s most prominent co-writers. Jaguar’s concise collection of silky R&B slow-burners show that Victoria Monet’s is a superstar in her own right. 

Some great albums I listened to that didn’t come out this year: Blue by Joni Mitchell, BLACKPINK IN YOUR AREA by BLACKPINK, I Need to Start a Garden by Haley Heynderickx, Plastic Beach by Gorillaz, Out in the Storm by Waxahatchee, 7 by Beach House, Dummy by Portishead, Lovers Fevers by Babygirl, and Red by Taylor Swift. 

Whether you liked, reblogged, or commented on a post, sent me an ask, or interacted with this blog in any way, thank you so much for all the support throughout the year! I can’t express how much I appreciate it. 

What were your favorite albums from this year? Did I miss anything? Send me an ask and let me know. I’ll tell you my thoughts, or put it on my to-listen-to list if I haven’t heard it. 

Here’s to 2021! May it clear the extremely low bar set by this year. 

[alienlifeform]

@coloriages tagged me so im posting 13 songs im into atm. before i begin i feel like its important that i emphasize i had no interest in almost any of these artists before may and this is not a reflection of my general character. with that said

funeral singers - sylvan esso & collections of colonies of bees

Idontknow - jamie xx

i dont think i can do this again - mura masa, clairo

twin fantasy (those boys) - car seat headrest

high to death - car seat headrest

burning man - car seat headrest

heat waves - glass animals

dreamland - glass animals

a life worth missing - car seat headrest

dramamine - modest mouse

you’ll miss me when im not around - grimes

kill v. maim - grimes

ringtone - 100 gecs

as a bonus i just spent 45 minutes listening to different covers of leonard cohen’s hallelujah to decide which one i like best. cant pock between the shrek version (nostalgia, gay voice) and the jeff buckley version (lets me sing all 7 verses)

im tagging @thesunnysideofthestreet @wildersage @catrin-the-mediocre @afternoonflowers @divafit @cyprinodont @ajaegerpilot and anyone else who wants to do it but hasnt gotten asked. just tag me in the post and ill add your name to the list. ill even shuffle them up so no one can tell who was added when

[bing-fucker]

mark and jamie gettin it on + voyeur benji 👀👀👀 (bonus points, one of them sees him watching but keeps going and actually gets more turned on)

So fun fact. The first time I tried writing this, Tumblr crashed when I tried to post it and destroyed all my work. I tried to write it a second time and my notes app crashed and I lost all my progress. So this is actually the third time I’ve tried to write this prompt, and you know what? I love it. I genuinely think this is the best version of it I’ve written. Also, I just love this prompt as a whole.

Looking back on it now, I realize that Jamie might come across as a little rude or unnecessarily cruel to Benjamin, given he knows that Benjamin is there and still wants Mark to say that he isn’t attracted to him and doesn’t love him, but I promise that he isn’t doing it to be intentionally hurtful. Jamie is just insecure because Mark is technically married, and has hundreds of adoring fans. He’s scared of Celine returning or Mark leaving him for someone more interesting, and it kinda shows in possessive behavior and being a bit mean to Benjamin.

Warnings: Nonconsensual voyeurism, lube-less sex, underwater blowjobs, possessive behavior, use of the phrase “sex kitten”. As always, ask me to add any necessary warnings!

Mark was taking a bath. He took one at least once a day, usually in the morning to wipe off all the grime of the day before and the night. Sometimes he took two a day if he’d been filming or had had a particularly rigorous workout. Although he only washed his hair every other day, because he had a sensitive scalp and didn’t want to dry his scalp out.

Of course, none of that was to say that Benjamin was spying on his master! He would never do such a thing! He was merely… keeping watch. It was for his master’s protection! With a no good gold digger like that Jameson Jackson around, Benjamin had to keep watch to protect his master! It was only right! After all, his master was still recovering from Mistress Celine running away (she had always been no good. Benjamin had always thought so. No good, and certainly not good enough for Master Mark)! Benjamin had to protect his master! He certainly wasn’t admiring the way the water looked gliding down the master’s skin, or how the master’s wet hair shone beneath the morning light! And he most certainly was not thinking about how the master’s member looked, still standing stiff from whatever dream he’d woken up to, as he had climbed into the water.

The manor was full of all sorts of secret passages - some that Benjamin could swear did not exist when he first came to the manor. But the manor had always been a bit strange - and Benjamin often put them to good use. Not for his spying, of course. Merely for the sake of keeping a watch on the master. Make sure he was safe. That was where Benjamin was now, hiding in the space between walls and watching through a thin slat that allowed him just enough to see the master’s full body from afar.

“Oh?”

Benjamin was shaken out of his thoughts by the sound of the master’s voice echoing through the bathroom. Benjamin stiffened. Mark was looking almost directly at him, an amused smirk on his face.

“I can see you, you know,” Mark said, laughing softly and sitting up. There was a gunshot scar right over his heart. Oh, how Benjamin wished he had been the one to save Mark that day and be the one to press kisses over the wound and assure Mark that he was beautiful no matter what.

“It’s okay, I’m not mad.” Was he speaking to Benjamin? He had to be, right? Benjamin was the only one over here, right?

“Come here, beautiful,” Mark said, smile soft and welcoming.

Benjamin almost reached for the doorknob to enter the bathroom, but then someone stepped into his view.

-

Jamie blushed faintly, stepping out from behind the screen he had been shaving behind. He’d already finished shaving when Mark had come in, and he’d been too shy to leave.

“Were you spying on me?” Mark asked, smirking playfully.

“I was not!” Jamie protested, blushing more. “You just happened to come in at a rather inopportune moment!”

“Mmm,” Mark hummed disbelievingly. “I’m definitely convinced of that.”

“Well, you should be! It is true!” Jamie replied, crossing his arms and pouting.

“All right, I will,” Mark laughed. “Come join me, dollface. The water is great.”

Jamie rolled his eyes playfully and turned his back to Mark, slowly beginning to strip out of his pajamas. He smirked, looking directly at Benjamin’s hiding spot as he stripped and offering the hidden butler a wink as he turned around and strode over to Mark. Mark grinned and, gripping his hips, carefully helped Jamie into the water and onto his lap.

“Well, hello there,” Mark whispered, grinning up at Jamie.

“Hello to you, too,” Jamie replied, blushing.

“Your mustache looks very nice,” Mark complimented, gently stroking Jamie’s mustache.

“I already groomed it for the day.”

“I plan to ruin that.”

“I figured you would.”

Mark laughed softly, leaning in as Jamie kissed him firmly. He gently rubbed circles against Jamie’s hip bones with his thumbs as the younger man gripped Mark’s hair possessively, gently pulling his head to the side and trailing kisses down to his throat. Mark gasped as Jamie bit his throat harshly, hips jerking up against the little gentleman as Jamie sucked a dark mark against his throat before moving his head around, seemingly trying to make a whole ring of his marks around Mark’s throat.

“Well, you’re certainly in a mood of some ki-” Mark cut himself off with a sudden loud moan as Jamie’s head disappeared beneath the water and Mark’s cock was suddenly enveloped by the familiar, warm heat of Jamie’s mouth.

- 

Benjamin had been seen. He’d been seen! Jameson had seen him- had winked at him! Benjamin should have left right at the moment Jameson had stepped out. Keeping an eye on Mark was one thing, but Benjamin had no right to look at Jameson! Jameson may have been some horrible little child that didn’t deserve Mark, but he was still Mark’s! Benjamin had no right to see his naked body and now…

Well. It was impossible to deny. Jameson’s head had disappeared, and now Mark was moaning. It was impossible to deny that Jameson was currently enjoying the privilege of having the master’s cock down his throat. And he was apparently very good at it if Mark’s moaning was any indication. Benjamin shifted, trying to pretend that it was only discomfort he was feeling. Trying to pretend as if there was no tent in his slacks as he watched Mark’s head fall back beautifully, sunlight shining over the bruises on the tanned skin of his throat. Bruises that Benjamin wished he had had the pleasure of leaving.

Before he knew what he was doing, Benjamin’s cock was out of his trousers and in his hand as he listened to Mark’s moaning. It was very easy for him to imagine the feeling of Mark’s cock down his throat, the feeling of Mark’s soft hand in his hair. Mark had yelled for Benjamin enough times that it was very easy for the butler to imagine those shouts as moans of pleasure. Benjamin bit his lip to hide a moan as he imagined that it was his name on his master’s lips.

- 

“Jamie~” Mark moaned, gripping Jamie’s hair tightly as the younger man came out from under the water. He was soaking wet and his lips were swollen. Mark groaned softly, swiping his thumb against Jamie’s bottom lip.

“God, you’re perfect, dollface,” Mark breathed, pulling Jamie closer and kissing him deeply. Jamie grinned into the kiss pulling away after only a few seconds and turning around.

“You know, I think I’ve corrupted you,” Mark commented, groping Jamie’s ass with one hand and using the other to finger him open. “You used to be perfectly innocent when I met you. Sweet little starlet, all wide-eyed and excited for the world.”

“I was never perfectly innocent,” Jamie replied, moaning softly and pressing back against Mark’s hands.

“You were,” Mark replied, laughing softly. “I remember the first time we had sex. You were adorable.”

“Are you saying I am not adorable now?”

“Oh, you definitely are. But a different kind of adorable. Now you’re my adorable little sex kitten,” Mark purred, lining his cock up with Jamie’s entrance and slowly pushing in, drawing moans from both himself and the small starlet beneath him.

“Sex kitten?” Jamie shot a look over his shoulder.

“Yeah,” Mark laughed. “Like it?”

“It is horrible.”

“I knew you’d love it.” Mark grinned and rolled his hips, drawing a sharp gasp from the younger actor beneath him. Mark moaned softly as he started to fuck Jamie in earnest, gripping the smaller’s hips tightly. Jamie moaned, gripping the lip of the tub and squeezing his eyes shut as he moved in tandem with Mark.

- 

Benjamin hated it. Hated seeing Mark with someone that wasn’t himself. Mark deserved so much better than anyone who had ever presumed to touch him. But even Benjamin had to admit that Mark and Jameson looked good together. They looked better than good, in fact, they looked incredible. They were opposites in appearance. Mark was- well, tall was a generous term, but certainly taller than Jameson, and tanned and clean-shaven and muscular. Jameson was small and pale and had well-groomed facial hair, and a delicate frame. It was hypnotizing to see them move together. To see the way their bodies fit together so well.

Benjamin bit his lip harder, squeezing his eyes shut and trying to block out the image of how beautiful Jameson looked being fucked by his master. Trying to block out the idea that, perhaps, it was Benjamin that didn’t deserve to touch his master like that. After all, he could never be as beautiful and delicate as Mark liked.

But that didn’t matter, he reminded himself. What mattered was what was inside. Sure, Jameson was gorgeous, but he wasn’t worthy! Mark deserved someone who would be devoutly loyal to him, and Jameson was far too young for that. The young ones never lasted. Jameson should have been gone within the week, having gotten bored. He shouldn’t still be here after a year.

Benjamin shook his head firmly, clearing his mind of any thought of Jameson and instead focusing on the moans of his master and the feeling of his hand around his cock. It wasn’t easy to imagine his hand as Mark’s - Mark’s hands were much softer than Benjamin’s - but it was easy to get lost in his own fantasy at the sound of Mark’s moans. Images of Mark pinning him against the wall flooded his mind. The idea of his master so firm and commanding, Benjamin’s marks around his throat as he fucked the butler over every surface in the manor.

Benjamin barely noticed that he’d cum at the same time as his master.

-

Mark groaned softly, kissing Jamie deeply as they came in tandem, his cock buried deep in the small starlet. Jamie moaned softly into the kiss, pulling away after a few seconds to press his forehead against Mark’s. Mark smiled and held Jamie lovingly, moving so they were leaning against the back of the tub, Jamie in his lap with his back against Mark’s chest.

“You’re beautiful,” Mark commented, smiling softly.

“So are you,” Jamie replied, leaning his head against Mark’s shoulder and resting his arms over Mark’s.

“Would it be ridiculous if I said I loved you?”

“A little.”

“Okay.” Mark smiled softly and kissed Jamie’s cheek. Jamie smiled and blushed faintly, leaning into the kiss.

“You never mark me this much. Do you want to talk about what’s got you in a possessive mood?” Jamie frowned and moved away from Mark, turning around to straddle his hips and looking at him seriously. Mark shifted around, looping his arms around Jamie’s waist.

“Benjamin is in love with you.”

“I know. It’s very obvious. I thought it didn’t bother you?”

“It does. I don’t like how he looks at you. Do you love him?”

Mark smiled softly and cupped Jamie’s cheek with one hand, gently rubbing the starlet’s cheekbone with his thumb. “You have nothing to worry about, dollface.”

“I want you to say that you don’t love him, or are even attracted to him.”

“I do not love Benjamin, dollface, nor am I even attracted to him. And even if I was, nothing could ever come of it.”

“I know that. But I still don’t like it.” 

“What would you have me do about it?”

“Promise me,” Jamie signed firmly. “Promise me that you’re mine for as long as possible.”

“Only if you promise me the same.”

“I promise.”

“Then I promise.”

If either noticed that Benjamin was tearful for the rest of the day, they didn’t care to comment.

[thunderstruck-amanita]

Are you really qualified to give romantic advice? for Yancy and Host? (Bonus if hg!alwm ;3 )

8009 words (aka they always come out so much longer than i expect aaaahhhh)

Ginny belongs to @queen-virginia Grace belongs to @dorks-in-fiction​ Callie belongs to @the-yancied-piper and this drabble takes place after a piece @ambigiousgelpens wrote, in which Yancy met Host by punching him in the nose, then rumbled with him in a wrestling ring.  They tolerate each other :)

~~~

Yancy grimaced as he gave a half-hearted knock on Host’s door.

“Hey, youse in there, pal?”

No response.

Yancy opened the door with one hand, balancing a tray of pad thai and black coffee with the other.  He hated this guy.  He really did.  Ok, so he was blind and prone to panic attacks, surely that much could be understood.  But the grime? The dust? The utter… filth this man lived in? Yancy shuddered as he gently toed aside a pile of blood-soaked rags with a grimace.  Prison was a million times cleaner than this room, and that was saying something.  It was almost like the guy wanted mold to grow inside his lungs.

Host was hunched over in a way that couldn’t possibly be uncomfortable as he hissed into the microphone, so Yancy waited.  He would have leaned against the cabinet, but the mysterious stains and thick layer of dust made him decide against it.  He tapped a foot and hummed to himself, zoning out as Host prattled on.

“… and remember Mark.  If you’re out there.  We’re coming for you.”  Host clicked off the radio and removed his headphones before turning to Yancy with a scowl.  “Next time you interrupt my broadcast, please do so with a song that is not so plebian and aggravating.”

“Hey, Dancing Queen is a bop and youse’s just upset cause it ain’t that Maybe Giants somethin’ or other you can’t stop listenin’ to,” Yancy quipped back as he cleared a spot on the table for Host’s tray.

They were still fairly antagonizing to each other, but at least their squabbling was more lighthearted now… At least it seemed to be?  Maybe?  Yancy honestly couldn’t tell.  He was sure Host would never forgive him for clocking him in the face when he first arrived at the manor, but the outright snarling had turned into guttural throat noises, so he would take that as a win.

“I’d leave ya now, but after that lil science experiment you started last month, Doc says youse gotta be supervised durin’ mealtimes,” he announced, sitting on the least-stained edge of the man’s bed.  He would have sat on the chair right next to Host, but the last time he had done so resulted in an intimidating snarl about how the seat was reserved.  Lesson learned.

Host growled.  “I told him I don’t like grapefruit,” he replied as he grabbed a handful of noodles and crammed it in his mouth.

Yancy scoffed.  “Well, then next time you can at least throw it away like a normal person instead’a stuffin’ it under youse’s bed.  I’m surprised anyone even noticed the stench.  And gee whiz Hostie, use a fork like a human being.”

Host bristled and slurped up another noodle from his hand defiantly.  “Don’t tell me what to do, jailbird.”

Yancy raised up his hands in faux innocence.  “Hey, don’t youse go shootin’ the messenger now.  Doc’s orders were to make sure you ate and at least tried with the forks ‘n stuff.”

Then something happened that Yancy had never seen before.

The edges of Host’s lips turned up, revealing two rows of abnormally sharp teeth covered in peanut sauce.  A chill ran down Yancy’s spine.  He felt like an animal that had just been lunged at with no escape.

Oh, this wasn’t going to end well, was it.

“Speaking of the good doctor,” Host purred as smoothly as he could in his gravelly voice as he licked his fingers and reached for the fork obediently.  The sudden shift was not comforting to Yancy at all.  “I heard about your recent… hm… quest for assistance from him.”

Yancy’s face reddened at the memory and he squirmed uncomfortably.  “N-now see here, that was a misunderstandin’! I was just askin’ an innocent question and that screwy ol’ Doc got all…” He waved his hands in the air as if to simultaneously find the right word and shoo away the memory.  “All ‘anatomy’ on me.  Which, by the way, was not the sorta advice I was looking for.”

Host hummed as he stabbed another bite of pad thai, enjoying himself far too much for Yancy’s liking.  “Of course.  But, you do realize, there are some residents of this manor who have romantic expertise, if that’s the sort of advice you were looking for.”

Yancy huffed. “I tried askin’ Illi, but he’s got no clue as to how he landed Ginny.  An’ honestly, I don’t either.”

Host scarfed down several more bites with unsettling slurping noises before responding.  “You do realize that Illinois is not the only resident here in a romantic relationship?”

Yancy screwed his lips up as he ticked off members of the manor in his head.  Bing and Google were androids, and single as far as he knew.  Captain Magnum said he was “married to the sea” and Eric was a bit young for Yancy to feel comfortable asking him for help.  Yancy seriously doubted whether Wilford would actually have anything helpful to say, regardless of how many relationships he had been in before. There was the mix-up with Darkiplier and Grace, but that had also been resolved, leaving both of them happily single.  And then there was Callie and… oh.

Callie… and…

Host smirked widely as Yancy groaned in realization.

“Oooohhh no way,” Yancy snapped, wagging his finger at Host.  “No ways am I askin’ any sorta romantic advice from the likes a’ youse.  Are you really qualified to give romantic advice anywhos?  From what I heard, it was Callie who’d done all the legwork to get youse twos together in the first place.”

Host sneered and flicked aside a piece of broccoli with his fork.  “I played They Might Be Giants,” he sniffed in response.

“Yeah, a real charmer, you.  Eat the greens,” Yancy chided.

Rather than listening, Host shoved the entire plate away.

“How about this then,” he said, swiveling in his chair to face Yancy, grabbing the mug by the lip and taking a sip.  Yancy grimaced.  He didn’t like where this was going, and he definitely didn’t like the fact that the man refused to use the perfectly good handle of his mug.

“I tell you all the secrets as to how I was truly able to charm my little lady, and you leave out the details of my lunch habits in your report to the Doctor.”

Yancy scowled, as he stared between Host and the pile of uneaten vegetables.  “I doubt that not showerin’ is gonna help me get Nat’s attention in a good way, so no thank you, pal.”

Host shrugged as he took another sip.  “If you desire to continue wallowing in self-pity and pining loneliness, then be my guest.  If you want advice, however…” He set his cup down and folded his hands in front of him.  “Those are my terms.”

Yancy stared at him.  No way was he that desperate.  He’d known Natalie for years, surely he could tell her how he felt without having to stoop this low.  There was no way he needed help, especially not from this slimy, disgusting-

“Deal.”

Host’s self-satisfied smirk made Yancy instantly regret his decision and wonder just how much trouble he would be in if he punched Host in the face again.  The answer: more than the satisfaction would be worth, but only just barely.

“But just so you knows, I ain’t doin’ this cause I can’t do it on my own,” Yancy huffed as he grabbed the tray.  “It’s only cause I don’t care whether or not youse eats your vegetables, I’m not your ma.”  For a blind man who had scarfed down the food like his life had depended on it, Host had expertly picked even the smallest strings of zucchini and carrot out of his meal.  If it wasn’t so petty, Yancy would almost be impressed.

The corners of Host’s mouth turned up again, and Yancy finally realized that it was his version of a smile.  Yeesh.

“Excellent. Until tomorrow.”

Host seemed pleased as he put his headphones back on, and Yancy made a face at the back of his head.  He was sure this wasn’t going to work.  Almost positive, in fact.  But if he could both win Nat over and get on Host’s good side with minimal damage to himself?

It could be worth it.

Maybe.