#blue spring (2002)

[heavenslostchild]

blue spring (2002)

[thyme-in-a-bubble]

a list of some summer movies/series 🌞

hi hi hi!! it's just me, your friendly neighbourhood little organisation freak of a goblin here to give you yet again a list of some seasonal movies and series. this time, say it with me folks, summer! as always, just close your eyes and point somewhere on this little list, or even put the numbers in a generator and go with whatever the result is ♡

autumn | winter | spring

🐚 ‧₊˚ ⋅ movies ⋅˚₊‧

roman holiday (1953)

jaws (1975)

friday the 13th (1980)

Indiana jones (1981-)

dirty dancing (1987)

the princess bride (1987)

paris is burning (1990)

point break (1991)

jurassic park (1993-)

before sunrise (1995)

a goofy movie (1995)

clueless (1995)

birdcage (1996)

boogie nights (1997)

i know what you did last summer (1997)

my best friend's wedding (1997)

parent trap (1998)

bilboard dad (1998)

tarzan (1999)

the talented mr. ripley (1999)

10 things I hate about you (1999)

the mummy (1999)

cast away (2000)

almost famous (2000)

our lips are sealed (2000)

charlie’s angels (2000 + 2003)

holiday in the sun (2001)

the wedding planner (2001)

the fast and furious franchise (2001-)

princess diaries (2001-2004)

lilo and stitch (2002)

blue crush (2002)

crossroads (2002)

how to lose a guy in 10 days (2003)

under the tuscan sun (2003)

the lizzie mcguire movie (2003)

pirates of the caribbean franchise (2003-2017)

sisterhood of the traveling pants (2005-2008)

monster in law (2005)

aquamarine (2006)

she’s the man (2006)

the cheetah girls 2 (2006)

high school musical 2 (2007)

camp rock (2008)

vicky cristina barcelona (2008)

fool's gold (2008)

mamma mia (2008 + 2018)

adventureland (2009)

bride wars (2009)

hannah montana the movie (2009)

the last song (2010)

letters to juliet (2010)

eat pray love (2010)

one day (2011+2024)

a little bit of heaven (2011)

soul surfer (2011)

the impossible (2012)

magic mike (2012+2025+2023)

the big wedding (2013)

lovelace (2013)

endless love (2014)

chef (2014)

the longest ride (2015)

mad max: fury road (2015)

the shallows (2016)

it (2017)

girls trip (2017)

baywatch (2017)

jumanji: welcome to the jungle (2017)

gifted (2017)

call me by your name (2017)

crazy rich asians (2018)

adrift (2018)

ibiza (2018)

every day (2018)

bad times at the el royale (2018)

tomb raider (2018)

the red sea diving resort (2019)

midsommar (2019)

we summon the darkness (2019)

spider-man: far from home (2019)

the devil all the time (2020)

palm springs (2020)

the last letter from your lover (2021)

raya and the last dragon (2021)

luca (2021)

uncharted (2022)

glass onion (2022)

do revenge (2022)

the lost city (2022)

the gray man (2022)

death on the nile (2022)

barbie (2023)

bottoms (2023)

anyone but you (2023)

la passion de dodin bouffant (2023)

road house (2024)

the challengers (2024)

players (2024)

twisters (2024)

🍦 ‧₊˚ ⋅ series ⋅˚₊‧

the o.c. (2003-2007)

america's next top model (2003-2018)

project runway (2004-)

h2o: just add water (2006-2010)

gossip girl (2007-2012)

private practice (2007-2013)

rupaul’s drag race (2009-)

the walking dead (2010-2022)

new girl (2011-2018)

the fosters (2013-2018)

black-ish (2014-2022)

jane the virgin (2014-2019)

grace and frankie (2015-2022)

critical role (2015-)

stranger things (2016-)

the durrells (2016-2019)

big little lies (2017-2019)

she's gotta have it (2017-2019)

the bold type (2017-2021)

queer eye (2018-)

station 19 (2018-2024)

euphoria (2019-)

roswell, new mexico (2019-2022)

valeria (2020-2023)

911: lone star (2020-)

outer banks (2020-)

bridgerton (2020-)

sex/life (2021-2023)

the white lotus (2021-2025)

daisy jones and the six (2023)

[thehermitsaltar]

Okay so Billy Hargrove x Male reader

The relationship it established and it’s on a hot spring day after school with billy driving you home but your so eager for him that you end up sharing a cigarette with billy sometimes blowing smoke into your open mouth, it turns into more when you purposely kiss him which makes him stop the car and eagerly place you in his lap, things happen and before long he’s got his hands underneath your knees on the undersides of your thighs and it holding your legs up whilst he fucks you and constantly blows smoke into your greedy open mouth - hope it covers what we spoke about!!

A/N: thank you sm brook<3 I hope you like this

Billy Hargrove x Male Reader

Word Count: 2002

Sweat clung uncomfortably to your skin as you sat out in the blistering heat. The hot metal from the blue Camero you were leaning against burned into your jean-clad ass. You huffed and looked around the empty school parking lot for the thousandth time, hoping you'd spot the mess of blonde curls you loved so much. You contemplated tugging off your loose shirt, reasoning that no one would see or even care for that matter given how the midwest heat was affecting everyone.

You were too lost in thought to notice the crunch of shoes on gravel approaching your spot, only looking up when a strong arm snaked around your waist, pulling you into a broad, sweaty chest. You groaned and cringed at the way your combined sweat mixed and clung to your shirt. You smacked Billy's chest lightly before crossing your arms over your chest and rolling your eyes.

"What took you so long?" You weren't as mad as you let on, just tired and cranky from waiting out in the heat.

Your boyfriend had the audacity to chuckle and stare down at you with dark eyes, looking over every bead of sweat and every inch of skin.

"Sorry doll, coach kept me late. Said I was being too aggressive." He kept his eyes trained on your lips, making you blush more than the heat already had. The look in Billy's eyes made your knees weak and your thighs clench. You scoffed and rolled your eyes, trying to play off the growing erection you were sporting. "You blew me off to fight with Harrington?"

Billy shrugged, leaning in closer to you, close enough you could smell his cologne and the cigarette on his lips. His fingers found your waist, dancing along the hem, teasing the skin underneath.

"I'll make it up to you. Promise." Billy grinned that shark-like grin and pecked your cheek before pulling away completely. You shuddered, missing his warmth even though it was too hot for comfort outside. Billy hopped in the driverside with ease, feeling at home behind the wheel. You followed suit and slipped into the passenger's seat, letting your gaze drift to his bare chest still glistening with sweat when you went to buckle your seat belt. You shifted your eyes away fast, embarrassment heating up your already flushed cheeks.

Billy was quick to peel out of the parking lot, not even bothering with his own seatbelt, more concerned with pulling his Marlboro reds from the glove box in front of you. His fingertips grazed your knee, making your eyes snap up to his only to find a sly smirk on his lips before a cigarette replaced it. You kept your eyes on his lips, watching him light the smoke with ease before reaching over to snatch it from him. He was quick to pull it out of your reach, making you huff like a child.

"You leave me waiting in the heat and now you won't let me take a drag?"

Billy rolled his eyes and smoke fluttered out his nose when he breathed. He took a deep drag of the burning cigarette before grabbing the back of your neck, maneuvering you over the center console to awkwardly sit your mouth in front of his. His eyes flicked between your lips and the road rapidly. You opened your mouth, eager to taste the sweet nicotine, waiting for the smoke to curl into your lungs. Billy's chest deflated as he let out the smoke, his lips hovering mere millimeters from yours, too close yet too far. You breathed in time with him, feeling the smoke graze your tongue and seep into your throat.

You sat back in your seat, closing your eyes and savoring the taste, It wasn't the same as a normal drag from a cigarette but it was better because it was laced with Billy, the most addicting thing ever.

"Happy?" He breathed out, chest puffing with labored breaths. Clearly, the exchange was affecting him in the same way. You looked over at him lazily, feeling the heat seep into your bones. "More." Billy took another drag as you eagerly leaned over the console again, placing your hand high up on his thigh for stability, grazing over the growing erection in his pathetic little gym shorts.

His breath stuttered as he let out the smoke, this time his lips did pass over yours in the most delicious way. You pulled away while he tried to chase your lips for a chaste kiss, enjoying the way he huffed. "Such a tease."

You giggled lightly before plucking the cigarette from his fingers and took a long, satisfying drag, groaning at the taste. Billy's eyes followed your movements, shifting subtly in his seat to try and ease to pain in his shorts. You continued to smoke the stick until it was down to the last drag. With a final long drag, you leaned over once more and grabbed the back of his neck, stroking his long curls before fully pressing your lips to his, letting out the smoke into his mouth. Billy couldn't care less about the smoke anymore, only caring about the way your lips pressed against his softly before the kiss started to turn eager.

Billy pulled the car off to the side of the road hurridly, pressing on the break into a violent halt. You jerk forward, tearing your lips away from his for a moment before you reconnected. Your hands tangled into his hair which was damp with sweat. His own hands found your waist and chest, gripping your loose shirt tightly.

"Eager, huh?" You mumbled against his lips and chuckled. Billy growled deep in his chest and moved his lips down your jaw and settled high on your neck, biting and sucking where he knew you couldn't hide. Your moans and whines bounced around the metal interior of the Camero, spurring Billy's frantic movements more and more.

"Get in the back baby boy." Billy growled low in your ear, making you shiver.

You crawled into the back, Billy swatting your ass on the way, making you yelp. Once you settled in the back, you ripped off your shirt and threw it on the ground, Billy watching your movements with dark eyes, like a predator stalking his prey. He grabbed a cigarette and lit it before climbing into the back, towering over you.

"Fuck, your so pretty for me baby." His hands splayed over your chest, touching and memorizing every inch of your skin while his cigarette hung dangerously from his lips. His hands found your hips, yanking you flush against his hard cock that was hidden behind small green material. You moaned and threw your head back at the friction, trying to desperately grab anything to ground you. You wrapped your fingers around his wrist and let out a shaky breath.

"B-billy please." You whimpered and tried to grind against his rolling hips.

"Please what?" He leaned down to come face-to-face with you, silver earring dangling against his cheek.

"P-please fuck me, goddamnit Bills." You reached up to grab his back, trying to move and squirm under him in the cramped space for more friction.

"Only cause you asked so nicely." He chuckled darkly, words slightly slurred around the cigarette.

Billy was quick to yank your jeans down, smirking at the wet spot on your boxers before pulling those down too. You were bare under him, a shiver running over your body when your cock was finally freed. His hands caressed your thighs while he took a deep drag from his cigarette. He pressed your lips together again in a heated kiss full of lust as smoke curled around you two, making the already muggy air more suffocating.

Billy blindly reached over to the center console, franticly searching for the lube he kept there. He made an 'ah hah' noise before he pulled the bottle out and focused back on kissing you. You felt Billy guide the still-lit cigarette to your hands before his own disappeared out of sight. You focused on kissing him and touching his sun-kissed skin until a cold, wet finger circled your hole. You jumped a little at the freezing cold lube hitting your heated skin before relaxing into Billy's touch. His thick finger slowly inched into your tight hole, making you hiss.

No matter how many times you took his cock, he was still huge and you needed extensive prep. He loved watching you squirm and writhe under him while he prepped you so it was a win-win. He moved down to attack your neck with more hickeys while he fingered you open, savoring the moans and smoke that enveloped him.

You started to grow impatient, bucking down on his fingers and whining under him. Billy pulled away to look down at your sweaty, fucked out face before letting out a dark chuckle. "Eager, huh?" He mumbled mockingly, making you roll your eyes and huff at his antics. "Don't worry sweetheart, I said id make it up to you." Billy slathered more lube on his cock, rubbing it around and paying special attention to his pink tip. You watched him groan and throw his head back, feeling your own cock kick and leak against you.

Once he deemed himself ready, he plucked the cigarette back from your hands and placed it onto his lips, taking a deep drag. He placed his hands under your thighs and pushed them until your knees were on either side of your head. The stretch from the new angle makes you wince at the burn in your thighs before a new burn took over as Billy started to push his cock past your tight rim.

You both groaned in sync when his cock head popped into your hole. You tightened even more and tensed under him at the intrusion, the pain outweighing the pleasure. Billy cooed down at you and kissed your face, mumbling encouraging words to help you calm down. Once you signaled for him to continue, he started pushing the rest of his cock in, groaning at the tightness and heat your walls provided.

"Fuck, you feel so fucking good." Billy growled out, pushing your legs against you harder. You let out a surprised moan, feeling his cock slip the rest of the way in, bottoming him out as his hips pressed flush to yours. Billy towered over you, letting out short breaths, trying to focus on staying still. You groaned and clenched down on his cock, aching for him to move and make your brain fuzzy.

Billy started a brutal pace, pulling his hips back and slamming them inside you, rocking the Camero with every thrust. Every time his cock slid inside you it punched out breathy moans, making you arch uncomfortably in the cramped space.

All the need from your teasing car ride had started to build faster than you would have wanted, but judging by Billy's frantic thrusts, he was getting close to.

"Jesus, it's like you were fucking made for me." Billy grunted, his face and hair dripping with sweat. You could only moan and whimper in response, all coherent thoughts being fucked out of you. Billy took one last drag of his cigarette before he leaned down and kissed you, shoving his tongue into your mouth while his cock plunged deeper into your hole. You lost it when you tasted him. His cock slammed into your prostate and his tongue glided over yours while he fucked you through your orgasm. You saw stars and felt light, not even noticing Billy's own orgasm until you peered up at him, his face relaxed and deep breaths moved his chest.

He let your legs go and slowly lowered his body onto yours, being careful of his cock still inside you. You sighed softly when his weight settled on top of you, bringing your fingers down to card through his hair and stroke his back. He hummed softly and pushed his face into your neck.

"I forgive you."

[asoftepiloguemylove]

Hello! If it's not too much trouble, can I request a web for when you feel like everyone around you is getting better and moving on and doing well, but you're making no progress, or even getting worse?

i hope you're doing okay <33

Miranda July It Chooses You / 藍月 Blue Moon (1997) dir. Ko I-Chen / pinterest / Franz Kafka Diaries, 1910-1923 / 青い春 Blue Spring (2002) dir. 豊田利晃 Toshiaki Toyoda / Heather Havrilesky Ask Polly: My Life Is Pathetic!

[demifiendrsa]

Weekly Shonen Jump 55th anniversary appendix in Weekly Shonen Jump 2023 issue #33

1968 Weekly Shonen Jump Issue #1 Otoko Ippiki Gaki-Daisho by Hiroshi Motomiya 1969 Dr. Toilet by Kazuyoshi Torii 1970 The Gutsy Frog by Yasumi Yoshizawa 1971 Tezuka Manga Award 1st Edition Samurai Giants by Ikki Kajiwara & Ko Inoue Boy of the Wilderness Isamu by Soji Yamakawa & Noboru Kawasaki 1972 Astro Kyudan by Shiro Tōzaki & Norihiro Nakajima 1973 Play Ball by Akio Chiba Hochonin Ajihei by Jiro Gyu & Jo Big 1974 Akatsuka Manga Award 1st Edition 1975 The Circuit Wolf by Satoshi Ikezawa Doberman Deka by Buronson & Shinji Hiramatsu 1976 Toudai Icchokusen by Yoshinori Kobayashi Kochikame by Osamu Akimoto 1977 Ring ni Kakero by Masami Kurumada Susume!! Pirates by Hisashi Eguchi 1978 Cobra by Buichi Terasawa 1979 Kinnikuman by Yudetamago 1980 Dr. Slump by Akira Toriyama 1981 Captain Tsubasa by Yoichi Takahashi Cat's Eye by Tsukasa Hojo Stop!! Hibari-kun! by Hisashi Eguchi 1982 High School! Kimengumi by Motoei Shinzawa 1983 Fist of the North Star by Buronson & Tetsuo Hara Ginga -Nagareboshi Gin- by Yoshihiro Takahashi 1984 DRAGON BALL by Akira Toriyama 1985 City Hunter by Tsukasa Hojo Miraculous Tonchinkan by Koichi Endo Sakigake!! Otokojuku by Akira Miyashita 1986 Saint Seiya by Masami Kurumada 1987 JoJo's Bizarre Adventure by Hirohiko Araki The Burning Wild Man by Tadashi Sato 1988 Bastard!! by Kazushi Hagiwara Jungle King Tar-chan by Masaya Tokuhiro Rokudenashi BLUES by Masanori Morita Magical Taluluto by Tatsuya Egawa 1989 Weekly Shonen Jump reaches 5.000.000 copies in circulation Dragon Quest: The Great Adventure of Dai by Riku Sanjo & Koji Inada Video Girl Ai by Masakazu Katsura 1990 SLAM DUNK by Takehiko Inoue Chinyuki by Man Gataro Yu Yu Hakusho by Yoshihiro Togashi 1992 Hareluya II Boy by Haruto Umezawa 1993 Tottemo! Luckyman by Hiroshi Gamo Hell Teacher Nube by Makura Sho & Takeshi Okano 1994 Midori no Makibao by Tsunomaru Rurouni Kenshin by Nobuhiro Watsuki 1995 Weekly Shonen Jump reaches 6.530.000 copies in circulation Sexy Commando Gaiden: Sugoi yo!! Masaru-san by Kyosuke Usuta 1996 Hoshin Engi by Ryu Fujisaki Yu-Gi-Oh! by Kazuki Takahashi Kochikame 20th Anniversary & Chapter 1000 1997 I's by Masakazu Katsura Seikimatsu Leader den Takeshi! by Mitsutoshi Shimabukuro ONE PIECE by Eiichiro Oda 1998 Rookies by Masanori Morita Whistle! by Daisuke Higuchi HUNTERXHUNTER by Yoshihiro Togashi 1999 Hikaru no Go by Yumi Hotta & Takeshi Obata The Prince of Tennis by Takeshi Konomi NARUTO by Masashi Kishimoto 2000 JoJo's Bizarre Adventure: Stone Ocean by Hirohiko Araki BLACK CAT by Kentaro Yabuki 2001 Bobobobo Bobobo by Yoshio Sawai BLEACH by Tite Kubo 2002 Strawberry 100% by Mizuki Kawashita Eyeshield 21 by Riichiro Inagaki & Yusuke Murata 2004 Death Note by Tsugumi Ohba & Takeshi Obata Gintama by Hideaki Sorachi Katekyo Hitman Reborn! by Akira Amano D.Gray-man by Katsura Hoshino Muhyo & Roji's Bureau of Supernatural Investigation by Yoshiyuki Nishi 2005 Neuro: Supernatural Detective by Yusei Matsui 2006 To Love Ru by Saki Hasemi & Kentaro Yabuki 2007 Sket Dance by Kenta Shinohara 2008 Nura: Rise of the Yokai Clan by Hiroshi Shiibashi Toriko by Mitsutoshi Shimabukuro Bakuman. by Tsugumi Ohba & Takeshi Obata 2009 Kuroko's Basketball by Tadatoshi Fujimaki Beelzebub by Ryuhei Tamura Medaka Box by Nisio Isin & Akira Akatsuki 2010 ONE PIECE New World Begins 2011 Nisekoi by Naoshi Komi 2012 Haikyu!! by Haruichi Furudate The Disastrous Life of Saiki K. by Shuichi Aso Assassination Classroom by Yusei Matsui Food Wars: Shokugeki no Soma by Yuto Tsukuda & Shun Saeki 2013 World Trigger by Daisuke Ashihara Isobe Isobee Monogatari by Ryo Nakama 2014 Hinomaru Zumo by Kawada My Hero Academia by Kohei Horikoshi 2015 Black Clover by Yuki Tabata 2016 Yuuna and the Haunted Hot Springs by Tadahiro Miura Kimetsu no Yaiba by Koyoharu Gotouge BORUTO by Mikio Ikemoto & Ukyo Kodachi The Promised Neverland by Kaiu Shirai & Posuka Demizu Kochikame 40th Anniversary and Serialization End 2017 We Never Learn by Taishi Tsutsui Dr. STONE by Riichiro Inagaki & Boichi 2018 Jujutsu Kaisen by Akutami Gege

2019 Chainsaw Man by Tatsuki Fujimoto Mission: Yozakura Family by Hitsuji Gondaira 2020 Undead Unluck by Yoshifumi Tozuka MASHLE by Hajime Komoto Ayakashi Triangle by Kentaro Yabuki Me & Roboco by Shuhei Miyazaki BURN THE WITCH by Tite Kubo SAKAMOTO DAYS by Yuto Suzuki 2021 The Elusive Samurai by Yusei Matsui WITCH WATCH by Kenta Shinohara Blue Box by Kouji Miura 2022 Akane Banashi by Yuki Suenaga & Takamasa Moue

[uwmspeccoll]

It's Feral Friday!

If Special Collections were compared to a National Park- a thoughtfully curated, accessible experience of the wilderness of the natural world- where would its edges lie? What would be considered off the beaten path, how would its boundaries be defined, and in what ways would the landscape beyond those boundaries inspire our imagination and broaden our conceptions of the world and our communicative capacities?

That’s the realm of pluralistic inquiry explored by Feral Fridays, a new weekly post where we’ll feature items from our collection like zines, experimental book arts, independently produced poetry and other unruly materials that exist at the margins of publishing and literary traditions.

Let’s get Feral!   

--Ana, Special Collections Graduate Intern

Images:

That Way Issue 1, Spring 2021

That Way Issue 1, Spring 2021, pp. 23-24 (excerpt from interview w/Erma Fiend)

Thing Issue no. 3, Summer 1990

Re: Creation by Nikki Giovanni, Broadside Press, 1970

Aquarius Rising by Ben Fama, Ugly Duckling Presse, 2010

excerpt from Ugly Duckling Issue 6, October 2003

Lynch by Inch: an interview to Ali Khalid Abdullah 2003

Blue Horses for Navajo Women by Nia Francisco, Greenfield Review Press, 1988

Mildred Pierce Issue 3, April 2009

The Match! Number 97, Winter 2001-2002

[firthbetterorfirthworse]

Colin Firth

My first unhinged project involved watching all of Colin Firth's IMDB acting credits, to see how often he got wet.

Figured I'd make a master list of the posts I made. I didn't make a post on everything, so if there's one without a link you can always request to hear my thoughts hahaha

I also made a post about his hair choices, because he does a lot of period pieces and oh boy do I often have Thoughts

And here's a post about how his trend of getting wet changed our perception of Darcy forever

1917 (2019)

1919 (1984)

The Accidental Husband (2008)

The Advocate/Hour of the Pig (1993)

And When Did You Last See Your Father (2007)

Another Country (1984)

Apartment Zero (1988)

Arthur Newman (2012)

Before I Go To Sleep (2014)

Blackadder Back and Forth (1999)

Born Equal (2006)

Bridget Jones Diary (2001)

Bridget Jones: Edge of Reason (2004)

Bridget Jones' Baby (2016)

Camille (1984)

Celebration (2007)

A Christmas Carol (2009) Intro, Movie

Circle of Friends (1995)

Command (2018)

Conspiracy (2001)

Crown Court episode (1984)

Deep Blue Sea (1994)

Devil's Knot (2013)

Donovan Quick (2000)

Dorian Gray (2009)

Dutch Girls (1985)

Easy Virtue (2008)

Empire of Light (2022)

The English Patient (1996)

Femme Fatale (1991)

Fever Pitch (1997)

Fourplay/Londinium (2001)

Gambit (2012)

Genius (2016)

Girl With a Pearl Earring (2003)

The Happy Prince (2018)

Hope Springs (2003)

Hostages (1992)

Hour of the Pig/The Advocate (1993)

The Importance of Being Earnest (2002)

The King's Speech (2010)

Kingsman: Secret Service (2014)

Kingsman: Golden Circle (2017)

Last Legion (2007)

Londinium/Fourplay (2001)

Lost Empires (1986) Intro, Pt 1, Pt 2, Pt 3, Pt 4, Pt 5, Pt 6, Pt 7

Love Actually (2003)

Magic in the Moonlight (2014)

Main Street (2010)

Mamma Mia! (2008)

Mamma Mia! Here We Go Again (2018)

Mary Poppins Returns (2018)

Master of the Moor (1994) Pt 1, Pt 2, Pt 3, Pt 3 Finale

The Mercy (2017)

A Month in the Country (1987)

Mothering Sunday (2021)

My Life So Far (1999)

Nanny McPhee (2005)

Nostromo (1996)

Operation Mincemeat (2021)

Out of the Blue (1991)

Pat Hobby Teamed With Genius (1987)

Playmaker (1994)

Pride and Prejudice (1995) (I didn't make a single post, it got a bit away from me so you can find the collection of links on my Pride and Prejudice masterlist)

The Railway Man (2013)

Relative Values (2000)

The Secret Garden (1987)

The Secret Garden (2020)

The Secret Laughter of Women (1999)

Shakespeare in Love (1998)

A Single Man (2009)

St Trinians (2007)

St Trinians 2: The Legend of Fritton's Gold (2009)

The Staircase (2022)

Stars in Shorts (2012)

A Summer in Genoa (2008)

Supernova (2020)

Then She Found Me (2007)

A Thousand Acres (1997)

Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy (2011)

Trauma (2004)

Tumbledown (1988)

Turn of the Screw (1999)

Valmont (1989)

What A Girl Wants (2003)

Where the Truth Lies (2005)

The Widowing of Mrs Holroyd (1995)

Wings of Fame (1990)

[leonardcohenofficial]

tagged by @herbaklava @timrothencrantz and @wutheringdyke to post my top nine new-to-me watches of the year—thank you all! in no particular order (l-r, top row to bottom row):

skinamarink (kyle edward ball, 2023) great freedom (sebastian meise, 2021) earth mama (savanah leaf, 2023) nineteen eighty-four (michael radford, 1984) enys men (mark jenkin, 2022) marina abramović & ulay: no predicted end (kasper bech dyg, 2022) paris 5:59: théo & hugo (olivier ducastel and jacques martineau, 2016) nationtime (william greaves, 1972) giants and toys (yasuzo masumura, 1958)

while i hit my continual goal of half of the films by women and nonbinary filmmakers, i still definitely need to keep up with deliberately seeking out films by directors of color! tell me your faves if you’ve seen any of these; do we think i can hit 150 titles in 2024? 👀🎬🍿🎥

i'll tag @sightofsea / @lesbiancolumbo / @nelson-riddle-me-this / @draftdodgerag / @edwardalbee / @majorbaby / @radioprune / @glennmillerorchestra / @deadpanwalking and anyone else who'd like to do this!

my full watchlist is included under the cut, favorites of the year are bolded in red:

The Final Exit of the Disciples of Ascensia (Jonni Phillips, 2019)

Nothing Bad Can Happen (Katrin Gebbe, 2013)

Dive (Lucía Puenzo, 2022)

The Menu (Mark Mylod, 2022)

The Wonder (Sebastián Lelio, 2022)

The Whale (Darren Aronofsky, 2022)

Shapeless (Samantha Aldana, 2021)

Skinamarink (Kyle Edward Ball, 2023)

Avatar: The Way of Water (James Cameron, 2022)

Actual People (Kit Zauhar, 2021)

Honeycomb (Avalon Fast 2022)

Warrendale (Allan King, 1967)

Women Talking (Sarah Polley, 2022)

This Place Rules (Andrew Callaghan, 2022)

Nationtime (William Greaves, 1972)

Deep End (Jerzy Skolimowski, 1970)

Incident in a Ghostland (Pascal Laugier, 2018)

Keane (Lodge Kerrigan, 2004)

I Start Counting (David Greene, 1970)

Bones and All (Luca Guadagnino, 2022)

Tár (Todd Field, 2022)

The Most Dangerous Game (Ernest B. Schoedsack and Irving Pichel, 1932)

These Three (William Wyler, 1936)

Dead End (William Wyler, 1937)

The Sport Parade (Dudley Murphy, 1932)

We're All Going to the World's Fair (Jane Schoenbrun, 2021)

Ratcatcher (Lynne Ramsay, 1995)

Smile (Parker Finn, 2022)

Holiday (Isabella Eklöf, 2018)

When Women Kill (Lee Grant, 1983)

Softie (Samuel Theis, 2021)

My Old School (Jono McLeod, 2022)

Beyond The Black Rainbow (Panos Cosmatos, 2010)

The Diary of a Teenage Girl (Marielle Heller, 2015)

Infinity Pool (Brandon Cronenberg, 2023)

Murina (Antoneta Alamat Kusijanovic, 2021)

The Banshees of Inisherin (Martin McDonagh, 2022)

Doubt (John Patrick Shanley, 2007)

Enys Men (Mark Jenkin, 2022)

Bully (Larry Clark, 2001)

My King (Maïwenn, 2015)

Festen (Thomas Vinterberg, 1998)

Marina Abramovic & Ulay: No Predicted End (Kasper Bech Dyg, 2022)

Elles (Małgośka Szumowska, 2011)

Poison Ivy (Katt Shea, 1992)

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Is This Fate? (Helga Reidemeister, 1979)

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Madeline's Madeline (Josephine Decker, 2018)

The Strays (Nathaniel Martello-White, 2023)

Here Is Always Somewhere Else (René Daalder, 2007)

The Weather Underground (Sam Green and Bill Siegel, 2002)

American Revolution 2 (Mike Gray, 1969)

Judas and the Black Messiah (Shaka King, 2021)

Underground (Emile de Antonio, Mary Lampson, and Haskell Wexler, 1976)

Saint Omer (Alice Diop, 2022)

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Welcome to Me (Shira Piven, 2014)

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Knock at the Cabin (M. Night Shyamalan, 2023)

Blue Jean (Georgia Oakley, 2022)

Soft & Quiet (Beth de Araújo, 2022)

Jesus' Son (Alison Maclean, 1999)

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A Banquet (Ruth Paxton, 2021)

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Séance on a Wet Afternoon (Bryan Forbes, 1964)

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Summer of Soul (Amir "Questlove" Thompson, 2021)

Bad Things (Stewart Thorndike, 2023)

Still (Takashi Doscher , 2018)

Lake Mungo (Joel Anderson, 2008)

The Vanishing (George Sluizer, 1988)

The Ringleader: The Case of the Bling Ring (Erin Lee Carr, 2023)

Giants and Toys (Yasuzo Masumura, 1958)

Spoonful of Sugar (Mercedes Bryce Morgan, 2022)

Double Lover (François Ozon , 2017)

Hereditary (Ari Aster, 2018)

Bodies Bodies Bodies (Halina Reijn, 2022)

Don't Call Me Son (Anna Muylaert, 2016)

Great Freedom (Sebastian Meise, 2021)

Mother! (Darren Aronofsky, 2017)

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The Bloody Child (Nina Menkes, 1996)

Bunker (Jenny Perlin, 2021)

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Renaissance: A Film by Beyoncé (Beyoncé Knowles-Carter, 2023)

May December (Todd Haynes, 2023)

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[93bratz]

POTENTIAL

blue spring (2002) / this is not who i want to be, joanna sternberg / so far away (ft. suran), suga / the bell jar, sylvia plath / a different age, current joys / mirrorball, taylor swift / the book of light, lucille clifton

[virtual-mima]

Blue Spring (Directed by Toshiaki Toyoda, 2002)

[lovesongbracket]

Reminder: Vote based on the song, not the artist or specific recording! The tracks referenced are the original artist, aside from a few rare cases where a cover is the most widely known.

Lyrics, videos, info, and notable covers under the cut. (Spotify playlist available in pinned post)

Accidentally in Love

Written By: Adam Duritz, Dan Vickrey, David Bryson, David Immergluck & Matthew Malley

Artist: Counting Crows

Released: 2004

“I was really struggling with it. I generally don’t write songs on demand, and I almost got to the point where I thought I wasn’t going to do it. They just told me that the song had to be uplifting. They actually said, ‘Don’t write a song about Shrek. Write a song that’s about you.’ The funny thing is, the song ended up reflecting a lot of what was going on in my life at the time: falling in love with someone you’re not supposed to fall in love with because it’s inconvenient. My songs for Counting Crows are mature and generally don’t get a chance to reach kids. To be part of something like that is pretty cool.” – Adam Duritz via Billboard

[Verse 1] So, she said, "What's the problem, baby?" What's the problem? I don't know Well, maybe I'm in love (Love) Think about it Every time I think about it Can't stop thinking 'bout it How much longer will it take to cure this? Just to cure it, 'cause I can't ignore it if it's love (Love) Makes me wanna turn around and face me But I don't know nothin' 'bout love, uh [Chorus] Come on, come on Turn a little faster Come on, come on The world will follow after Come on, come on Because everybody's after love [Verse 2] So I said, I'm a snowball runnin' Runnin' down into the spring that's comin' All this love meltin' under blue skies Belting out sunlight, shimmering love Well, baby, I surrender To this strawberry ice cream Never-ever-ender All this love Well, I didn't mean to do it But there's no escaping your love, oh [Bridge] These lines of lightnin' mean we're never alone Never alone No, no [Chorus] Come on, come on Move a little closer Come on, come on I wanna hear you whisper Come on, come on Settle down inside my love, ohh Come on, come on Jump a little higher Come on, come on If you feel a little lighter Come on, come on We were once upon a time in love [Post-Chorus] We're accidentally in love, accidentally in love Accidentally in love, accidentally in love Accidentally in love, accidentally in love Accidentally in love, accidentally in love Accidentally, I'm in love, I'm in love [Refrain] I'm in love, I'm in love I'm in love, I'm in love Accidentally, I'm in love, I'm in love I'm in love, I'm in love I'm in love, I'm in love Accidentally [Chorus] Come on, come on (Come on) Spin a little tighter Come on, come on (Come on) And the world's a little brighter Come on, come on (Come on) Just get yourself inside her love I'm in love

Demolition Lovers

Written By: Matt Pelissier, Mikey Way, Ray Toro & Gerard Way

Artist: My Chemical Romance

Released: 2002

The Demolition Lovers are the couple seen on the cover for MCR’s next album, Three Cheers For Sweet Revenge. This song, along with much of the album, is a prequel to the story of Three Cheers… in which a man makes a deal with the devil to get his dead lover back by killing 1,000 evil men and giving the devil their souls in exchange for her. This song is most likely where the lover dies. The two “Demolition Lovers” are featured on the cover of the album.

[Verse 1] Hand in mine, into your icy blues And then I'd say to you, "We could take to the highway With this trunk of ammunition, too" I'd end my days with you, in a hail of bullets [Chorus] I'm trying, I'm trying To let you know just how much you mean to me And after all the things We put each other through and [Verse 2] I would drive on to the end with you A liquor store or two keeps the gas tank full And I feel like there's nothing left to do But prove myself to you, and we'll keep it running [Chorus] But this time, I mean it I'll let you know just how much you mean to me As snow falls on desert sky Until the end of everything I'm trying, I'm trying To let you know how much you mean As days fade and nights grow And we grow cold [Post-Chorus] Until the end, until this pool of blood Until this, I mean this, I mean this, until the end of [Chorus] I'm trying, I'm trying To let you know how much you mean As days fade and nights grow And we grow cold But this time, we'll show them We'll show them all how much we mean As snow falls on desert sky Until the end of every… [Interlude] All we are, all we are is bullets, I mean this All we are, all we are is bullets, I mean this All we are, all we are is bullets, I mean this All we are, all we are is bullets, I mean this [Guitar Solo] [Bridge] As lead rains will pass on through Our phantoms forever, forever Like scarecrows that fuel this flame We're burning forever and ever Know how much I want to show you You're the only one Like a bed of roses There's a dozen reasons in this gun [Outro] And as we're falling down, and in this pool of blood And as we're touching hands, and as we're falling down And in this pool of blood, and as we're falling down I'll see your eyes, and in this pool of blood I'll meet your eyes, I mean this forever!

[woundthatswallows]

film recs?

i have a lot lol! i could break things up into catergories but since this is a general ask i'm just gonna cover mostly everything! i listed a lot of movies so i'd be happy to organize them a bit more into categories if anyone wants that, i just did it off the top of my head + w a little help from lists i've made on letterboxd. :)

here r some of my all-time faves that i’d rec: possession (1981) dead ringers (1988) harold and maude (1971) l’une chante, l’autre pas (1977) the piano teacher (2001) la morte vivante (1982) ginger snaps (2000) pink flamingos (1972) the rocky horror picture show (1975) twin peaks fire walk with me (1992) crash (1996) repulsion (1965) let’s scare jessica to death (1971) nekromantik (1988) + nekromantik 2 (1991) (second one is my fave but u have to watch the first first etc) girlfriends (1978) carnival of souls (1962) blue velvet (1986) martyrs (2008) a zed & two noughts (1985) multiple maniacs (1970) wild at heart (1990) 3 women (1975) dans ma peau (2002) dazed and confused (1993) kissed (1996) videodrome (1983) female trouble (1974) malina (1991) wings of desire (1987) persona (1966) the cremator (1969) the before trilogy teorema (1968) scenes from a marriage (1974) sunset boulevard (1950) les demoiselles de rocherfort (1967) the living end (1992)

and then some movies that i love/like and think people should watch: cecil b. demented (2000) ringu (1998) excision (2012) hausu (1977) the belly of an architect (1987) moonstruck (1987) les deux orphelines vampires (1997) valley girl (1983) angela (1995) may (2002) nashville (1975) phantom thread (2017) daisies (1966) candy (2006) society (1989) nowhere (1997) velvet goldmine (1998) caché (2005) the mafu cage (1978) funny games (1997) les raisins de la mort (1978) mysterious skin (2004) true romance (1993) y tu mamá también (2001) vampyres (1974) under the skin (2013) alice sweet alice (1976) audition (1999) vagabond (1985) high life (2019) spring night summer night (1967) secret ceremony (1968) candyman (1992) belle de jour (1967) hatching (2022) brain damage (1988) happy together (1997) in the mood for love (2000) cat people (1942) cléo from 5 to 7 (1962) je tu il elle (1974) thirteen (2003) masculin féminin (1966) vivre sa vie (1962) lost highway (1997) le bonheur (1965) une femme est une femme (1961) les parapluies de cherbourg (1964) babette’s feast (1987) arsenic and old lace (1944) the daytrippers (1996) a history of violence (2005) polyester (1981) ganja & hess (1973) impetigore (2019) volver (2006) pea d’âne (1970) the addiction (1995) train to busan (2016) chungking express (1994) smooth talk (1985) death in venice (1971) the incredibly true adventures of two girls in love (1995) my beautiful launderette (1985) wild (2016) lake mungo (2008) possum (2018) jeanne dielman, 23, quai de commerce, 1080 bruxelles (1975) les cent en une nuits de simon cinéma (1995) lola (1961) the passion of joan of arc (1928) le cérémonie (1995) stoker (2014) contempt (1963) eastern promises (2007) les yeux sans visage (1960) shivers (1975) american mary (2012) serial mom (1994) pierrot le fou (1965)

[naturalborndevil]

Spring, 2023 written by me / Blue (2002) Dir. Hiroshi Ando

[sluttyforpascal]

(Anti-) Hero - Joel Miller x OC

Chapter 1 - Welcome to Texas

Summary: September 2002. In the aftermath of her father's death, Jess Young travels to Austin. With her life enough in shambles as it is, her goals are simple: sort through her father's possessions and then sell the Texan home. Things in life are never that simple, though. Especially not when her father's friend-and neighbor from across the street-tries to keep an eye on her. Joel is a total piece of ass, which is highly distracting Jess from said goals. Will Joel capture Jess' heart... And panties? 😈

Warnings: Joel being hot AF, but sadly that's it (for now...).

Wordcount: 6k.

Author’s note: Ahhh Joel Miller... I. Am. Obsessed. I couldn't help myself and somehow this idea for yet another multichapter monster emerged. There's much filth that needs to be written. 🥵🔥 A special thanks to my dear friend @fizzyxcustard, who listens to me rambling about my Joel obession. You mean the world to me!! 🥰🥰❤

“Every new beginning comes from some other beginning’s end.”

-Seneca

Thursday 26th of September, 2002.

The taxi had brought her from the Austin International Airport to the suburbs of the city and though Jess usually enjoyed taking in the scenery along the route or talking to the cab driver, today she would not even have noticed if a purple elephant had been rampaging across the street. Even the cab driver—a handsome guy named Earl—had fallen silent, for his client was too distraught to even tell him who she was visiting or where she was from.

As she sat on the worn backseat and vaguely registered Nickelback’s ‘How you remind me’ coming from the stereo, the synthetic fabric burned against her bare legs—the Texan heat making it even more uncomfortable. Jess suppressed a groan and shifted in her seat. She knew she should have opted for her long sundress, but the denim shorts and flimsy Metal band-shirt she wore instead were rather comfortable; it made her feel safe within herself. And though Jess had spent the first years of her life in the south, apparently it was easy to forget how unforgiving the Texan sun could be—hence her current, uncomfortable state.

‘It’s hot today, don’t you think darlin’?’ Earl tried, his last attempt to engage in a polite conversation with the lady. ‘Yeah,’ Jess agreed, her deep blue eyes fixated on the back of the seat in front of her. She heaved a sigh, feeling a bit guilty she hadn’t obliged in some casual banter earlier. ‘I hadn’t expected it to last. October is right around the corner.’ ‘Summer’s not your favorite season, then?’ Earl asked, looking at her through the rearview mirror. His handsome hazel eyes observed her with interest. ‘You strike me as a lazy summer type of gal.’ Jess chuckled at that. ‘No, I am not.’ ‘Christmas, then?’ She momentarily thought of her mother and her overfondness of Christmas decorations, and shook her head. ‘Definitely not.’ ‘Spring?’ Earl tried. ‘No? Are you more of a Halloween and pumpkin flavored drinks type of lady?’ ‘Yeah, I do love fall.’ Jess caved in as she brushed her long, raven curls over one shoulder before glancing outside. She recognised the block they were driving on, which meant they were almost there. ‘What about yourself?’ ‘I like all seasons,’ the cab driver replied with a grin, and it made her wonder briefly if Earl was one of those people who liked to stay impartial on most topics—either too scared to make a bad impression or too dumb to function. ‘Every season has its benefits,’ Earl went on, stopping at a red light. ‘But if you’re makin’ me choose, I would pick summer. I like the warm weather and the late night parties that come with it… Where we smoke somethin’, if you know what I mean.’

Jess eyed his golden curls, and a small smile tugged on the corner of her lips. ‘Are you abusing substances that you shouldn’t, good sir?’ She quipped. ‘Nah,’ Earl countered. ‘Just the occasional bit of pot, you know. To chill.’ ‘I hear you.’ ‘Really?’ Earl said, watching her through his rearview mirror again. His hazel eyes flashed with interest. ‘You smoke?’ ‘Just the occasional bit of weed,’ Jess said with a grin. ‘A bad habit I picked up in highschool, mostly to annoy my mother.’

Their conversation was cut short, for they had arrived at the end of the street and consequently her father’s home. Earl stopped the car in the curve of the cul-the-sac and took in the suburban bungalow. Jess’ father had painted it in a faded blue color awhile ago and the color went nicely with the low, gray roof, white painted window sills and the patch of grass stretching out before it. Even the red Ford F-250 that was still parked in the driveway matched the color scheme nicely. ‘Nice place,’ Earl remarked. ‘Is it yours?’

Technically, it was. Or would be soon. But since Jess didn’t want to share the details of her life with a practical stranger, she settled for the easy answer. ‘No, it’s my dad’s,’ she replied as she unbuckled her seatbelt and opened the cab door. ‘I’m staying here for just a while.’

Earl got from his seat to retrieve her suitcase from the trunk of the car, while Jess gathered her bag from the backseat before following him. She slammed the door behind her and eyed the silent street while waiting for her baggage. It was around half past three, the sun just coming down from its daily peak. Since it was a Thursday most of the neighborhood was at work, except the elderly couple sitting in the shade of their front yard across the street—the Adlers, if she remembered it right. They had been at the funeral.

‘Hi sweetheart!’ Mister Adler called as he waved enthusiastically her way. Jess couldn’t help but smile at that and waved back.

‘Here,’ Earl said, directing her attention back again. ‘Here’s your suitcase.’ ‘Thanks,’ she murmured. ‘What do I owe you?’ ‘Twenty bucks?’ he said with a laugh, though he had driven her all the way from the airport which must have cost her much more than just twenty dollars. Earl watched her retrieve the money from her purse. ‘And…’ he continued after he had accepted the money, scratching the stubble on his chin. ‘Maybe I can call you sometime, y’know?’

The move was cheesy, but sweet. Her first instinct was to decline—she had a fiancé, after all—but then the realization hit her. Like her dad, Adam wasn’t in her life anymore.

‘Sure,’ she said with a nod and rummaged through her bag again, now for her notebook and a pen. She scribbled her phone number on the paper and tore it from the book. ‘Here,’ she said. ‘That’s my cell.’ ‘You got a mobile phone?’ he remarked as he accepted the piece of paper. ‘Nice.’

There was a small awkward silence, in which both of them didn’t know what to say. Jess shuffled on her feet, unsure how to continue. ‘I have to go,’ Earl finally said. ‘Have to get back to the city. I’ll call ya, okay?’ She nodded and watched as he got in his car, started the engine and turned in the cul-the-sac. Forcing herself to smile, she waved her ride goodbye as he disappeared in the street.

Then, she paused at the front of the yard—keys in one hand and her suitcase in the other. She knew she was stalling, but she granted herself a few seconds regardless. For entering her dad’s home like she owned the place, meant also accepting the fact that he truly was gone.

Dad’s place looked exactly like how they had left it the day after the funeral. Jess dumped her suitcase under the staircase in the small hallway, and moved to the living room on her right. She eyed the sparse furniture—her dad had been a practical man, not needing more than a television, comfortable chair, a couch no one sat on and a small dining table.

She heaved a sigh and moved through the living room into the kitchen, where the breakfast bowl she had used on the morning after the funeral still stood in the kitchen’s sink and a forgotten glass of water sat on the counter. Mom had been eager to catch their plane, pushing her daughter and daughter’s fiancé to hurry up.

Jess leaned against one of the bar stools, half expecting her father’s heavy footsteps on the stairs, excited to see her. ‘I miss you, dad,’ she mumbled, a lump forming in her throat. Her fingers traced aimless circles over the stone kitchen counter. ‘Wish you were here… You’d know what to do with me…’

The silence was deafening. ‘Please,’ Jess whispered, tears forming in her eyes. Her fingers faltered. ‘I… I don’t know what to do, dad… You’re gone and he—’

She couldn’t bear to say the words out loud, for the memory was still too fresh. Her chest burned, like someone had ripped her heart out of her cage. Adam had betrayed her, and the worst thing about it was that she hadn’t seen it coming. At all.

Diiiing.

‘Shit,’ Jess mumbled, quickly rubbing away the tears from her cheeks before making her way through dad’s home to the hall. Why mister Adler already was calling on her after she had been here for just five minutes was beyond her, but because she wasn’t exactly familiar with the neighborhood it would be wise to be on her best behavior. So when she opened the door, she was surprised to not find mister Adler, but Sarah Miller standing on her porch.

Jess knew the thirteen year old a bit, for their dads had been best pals from the moment the Millers had moved into one of the homes across the road—now six years ago. Though Jess’ father was twenty years Joels’ senior, the Millers had been quick to adopt her father as a part of their family and as a consequence, Jess had heard much about the family before even meeting them in person. Apparently Joel was a single father who had just started as an independent contractor in the construction business and Sarah was this quiet kid that—upon closer inspection—turned out to be equally funny and smart. So when Jess finally visited her father a few months after the Miller families’ arrival, she had expected to meet a typical American dad and his bright daughter. But as it turned out, her father had left one important detail out.

Joel Miller was anything but the typical American dad: he was a total piece of ass and he didn’t even know it… With his dark, tousled hair, his deep brown eyes, scruffy facial hair and sweet smile Joel had captured Jess’ heart—and panties, let’s be fair—the second he had greeted her, effectively turning her into this weird, clumsy gal she didn’t recognize.

Sure, she had experienced her fair share of crushes and dalliances before, but this was different. Something switched whenever Joel came around the corner; she laughed too loud, choked on her drink or said something extremely stupid. Her dad—who knew her too well—had teased her endlessly about her crush and at one point Jess had suspected him of matchmaking. Which, as she had told her dad, was highly inappropriate, for at the time she had been in a relationship with Adam.

‘Jess?!’ Sarah inquired with a small chuckle. ‘Are you in there?’ ‘Oh,’ Jess said, a genuine smile lifting the corners of her mouth. ‘Hi Sarah! I didn’t expect to see you this soon! I just arrived five minutes ago.’ ‘I’m sorry for disturbing you,’ Sarah quickly greeted her neighbor. ‘But my dad isn’t home yet and I forgot my keys. He will murder me when he finds out. I saw you entering mister Young’s—Carl’s—house, and I know he kept a spare for us. So I thought maybe you could help me find them and save my life?’

Jess laughed at the girl’s direct approach and leaned against the doorway, the hard wood uncomfortable against her shoulder. ‘I would gladly help you, but I have no idea where my dad kept your key, so you have to help me look. Deal?’ Sarah quickly obliged, her beautiful hazel brown curly hair bouncing as she nodded. She straightened the blue backpack that hung over her shoulders. ‘Come in,’ Jess said while stepping aside. ‘Do you want something to drink?’

Unfortunately, their search for the spare key turned out to be futile and after an hour, both Jess and Sarah had to accept the fact that they would never find out where Carl Young had kept the Miller’s house key—or his own spares, for that matter.

Both girls had resorted to the couch, initially exhausted by their search. Though it was nearing half past five, the Texan heat was still quite unforgiving, and the only way to cool off was lying splayed out on the couch, allowing the fan to wash over them—a cold glass of Coca Cola in hand.

‘How long are you staying?’ Sarah inquired, watching Jess taking a sip from her drink. ‘Dad said he wasn’t sure anyone would come back here….’ ‘I don’t know,’ Jess mused, watching the ice cubes float in her drink. The fan brushed over her face, her own hair ticking her cheeks. ‘A month, maybe two. I need to sort out all my dad's—Carl’s—stuff and I have an appointment with the notary to settle some affairs next week.’ ‘What will happen to the house?’

Jess shrugged, unable to present the teen with a clear answer. ‘I need to figure that out too. Maybe I will sell it, maybe I’ll stay.’

It was weird saying the idea out loud, for it only had existed in her own mind since she had boarded the plane. With her relationship with Adam in shambles and her mother living in the big city, the only thing that tied her down to Staten Island was her job. The school board hadn’t been too happy with one of their teachers taking unpaid leave when the term had just started, so Jess wasn’t even sure her spot would be there when she came back. If she’d come back.

In the background, the first tunes of INXS’ ‘Need you tonight’ emerged from the radio. Jess grinned brightly and despite the warmth she jumped from the couch. She had been addicted to this record back in 1987, when she had been just sixteen. ‘Sorry, I have to,’ she told Sarah—who was watching her in both typical teenage annoyance and amusement—and placed her drink on the radio before turning on the volume.

‘All you’ve got is this moment,’ Jess sang along with Michael Hutchence as she bust out her best dance moves. ‘Twenty-first century is yesterday….’

Sarah watched Jess making a fool out of herself and rolled with her eyes, though a small smile adorned her lips. ‘You look like my dad right now,’ she told her neighbor over the music. ‘’And trust me, it’s not a compliment. How old are you anyway?’ ‘I’m turning thirty in December,’ Jess replied with a laugh. ‘Which is—as my kids at school inform me—the equivalent to the age of the dinosaurs.’ ‘Yeah,’ Sarah agreed before taking a sip of her own drink. ‘That’s pretty old. Though my dad is even older than you are.’ ‘Oh, really?!’ ‘He turned thirty-five today,’ the teen told her. ‘So if you are turning into a carnosaur, don’t worry—dad’s probably of the herrerasauridae family.’

Jess laughed at the girls’ smart-ass notion. ‘Well played, young Miller,’ she quipped. ‘Have you bought him a gift?’ ‘Not yet,’ Sarah said, a frown now decorating her forehead. ‘I wouldn’t know what to get him and besides, he probably will be home late again. All he does is work.’ Jess heaved a sigh and turned down the volume again. She picked up her drink, absentmindedly rubbing away the condense the glass had left on the radio. She felt sorry for Sarah. Spending time with her dad must be important to her, especially because he was all she had.

‘We could start with buying a cake,’ she offered. ‘And see what Walmart has to offer that could be to Joel’s—your dad’s—liking?’ ‘You would do that?’ Sarah chimed, her dark brown eyes pleading for her neighbor to say yes. ‘But I have no money.’ ‘It’s nothing,’ Jess replied with a vague gesture from her hand. ‘I need to get some groceries anyway, and I think we should do something nice for your dad, don’t you agree?’ The teen nodded. ‘One problem, though,’ Jess murmured, her eyes scanning through the living room. ‘We still have to find the keys of my dad’s truck….’

It was around seven when the girls returned from their shopping spree. They had picked up some pizza on their way home—caprese for Sarah, pineapple for Jess, and pepperoni in case Joel showed up—and now were lounging on the couch while enjoying their meal and watching Legally Blonde that was showing on tv. Jess watched Sarah as she enjoyed her pizza, and laughed with her when Elle reprimanded Warner with the iconic burn of 2001: ‘What, like it’s hard?’

Sarah had picked up an Aerosmith and Nirvana CD—‘then he can finally listen to them on repeat in the car instead of one song on the radio’—and had chosen the most elaborate cake design they could find. And though the thirteen year old swore she would pay Jess back, the latter one refused kindly. It must be hard for Sarah that her dad was doing overtime on his birthday, and Jess hoped that Joel would return home soon.

She had just taken a huge bite of her pizza, when the doorbell rang again. ‘That must be dad,’ Sarah concluded, scrambling herself together. ‘Got it,’ Jess muffled with a mouth full of pineapple and rose from her seat. With the last of the pizza part still in her hands she walked towards the door, quickly swallowing her food before opening.

Joel Miller was still as hot as she remembered. He was leaning against her porch, his dark brown hair tousled from his day at work and his dark eyes observing her in a curious, though friendly manner—but if one would look closely, one could easily see the exhaustion written in them. Joel possessed a so-called ‘roman nose’, with a prominent curved bridge that ended in a sharp, though rounded tip. His full lips were crowned by a thick, dark mustache and his cheeks sported a messy scruff. It seemed like he had just arrived home: there was some construction dust on his temple and he still wore his work clothes—a simple black t-shirt that clung nicely to his defined torso and gray, worn jeans—both in the same rugged state. In his hands he held the note that Sarah had hastily scribbled on Jess’ counter before they left for the store, the post-it paper looking small compared to his palm.

‘Hey neighbor,’ Joel greeted her, his lazy southern drawl wrapping around her like a silk shawl. ‘I’m lookin’ for my daughter. She left a note on the door, sayin’ she would be here.’ ‘Yeah, she’s with me,’ Jess said, eyeing him with a small smile while she told herself to just breathe. ‘She forgot her key and said she’s grounded forever now.’ ‘She tryin’ to find an ally now?’ Joel said with a smirk. ‘Smart girl, raised her well.’ ‘Well, it is working…’ Jess commented. ‘I mean, come on, Miller. Is forgetting a key such a big offense?’ Joel laughed at that and ran the hand that wasn’t holding on to the note through his hair, tousling it further. His tanned arm flexed. ‘It is when there’s no one to let her in,’ he argued. ‘Carl had one, and I don’t like t’give the Adlers access to my place, if y’know what I mean. Can’t leave my daughter stranded.’ ‘No, definitely not,’ Jess agreed, thinking of mister Adler. Her dad had told her that though the couple was kind, they were very meddlesome; the type that would rearrange your home while you were away—just to help, of course. ‘Though,’ she went on. ‘In the event I hadn’t been home… I can imagine spending a free afternoon with the Adler’s would have been enough punishment, don’t you think?’ ‘Sure,’ he agreed. ‘She can count herself lucky that you were here.’

There was a short silence, in which they observed each other—gorgeous chocolate depths burning in their deep blue counterparts. A small twinge burned in the pit of her stomach, the same one she had felt at the funeral when Joel had shook her hand to pay his respects. It had struck out to her that even in her grief-stricken state a simple touch from him was enough to make something spark within herself.

‘How are you holdin’ up?’ Joel inquired gently, pulling her from her thoughts. ‘Hadn’t expect to see you back soon.’ ‘Me neither,’ she replied, stepping aside to let him in, and vaguely sensing the cold half-eaten pizza part in her hand. ‘But I have to handle some affairs here.’ ‘How long will you be stayin’?’ Joel asked as he brushed past her, his eyes not leaving her frame. ‘I don’t know,’ she confessed. ‘As long as I need to. To go through his stuff, I mean.’ Her throat went stuffy at the reminder of the enormous task of cleaning her dad’s home and sorting through his belongings; she wasn’t ready for that yet. Joel nodded, offering her a sympathetic smile. ‘Lemme know f’you need my help, okay?’ ‘You already work too much, birthday boy,’ she told him while she sent him a cheeky smile. ‘I wouldn’t want to impose on your free time.’ Joel groaned at that. ‘She told you, huh?’ ‘Happy birthday,’ Jess congratulated him as she waved with her pizza part. ‘I hope you’re hungry, we got you pepperoni.’ ‘Y’didn’t have to—’ ‘Yes, I did,’ she argued before taking a bite of her pizza. In her haste she accidentally gobbled down a larger chunk than she’d bargained for; of course her clumsy, nervous ass did. Joel watched her struggle to maintain her dignity—which meant not coughing herself to death in his presence—but her trachea protested against her ego’s wishes. Jess toppled forward and went into the very coughing fit she had been trying to avoid. Joel was eyeing her with growing concern and after a few moments of hesitation, he carefully rubbed her back. ‘Keep it up,’ he instructed, his tone calm. ‘It helps.’

Of course it did, she knew that. But it also meant that she turned into a watery eyed, tomato faced mess; and that was a look she didn’t particularly pursue. Jeez, the man was only in her vicinity for a minute and she already had to make a fool of herself?!

‘You’re not allowed to cook on your birthday—’ she began, her voice unsteady because at the same time her throat managed to get the loose chunk of pizza in the right place. ‘It’s one of my dad’s rules,’ she added while looking at him through tear stricken eyes, ‘and it’s bad luck if you do. The fact that you dared to mention it almost made me choke, Miller!’ A grin tugged on the corners of his mouth, whether it was from her pun or her current disheveled state, she didn’t know. ‘I remember him sayin’ that last year,’ Joel remarked, his hand still on her back. ‘Carl took us out for burgers.’

Jess slowly rose from her huddled position and smiled faintly. The sweet taste of pineapple burned in her throat and she still couldn’t see properly through the tears, but her heart stung at the memory. She should have visited her dad more often, but at the time she had been so busy with her own, Adam-infused life… ‘S’okay,’ Joel murmured as his fingers brushed over her t-shirt once more, which set off a confusing array of emotions in her system.

‘Dad?! Jess?! What are you two doing?!’ Sarah called as she jumped from the couch and made her way through the hall. Upon eyeing the pair she laughed. ‘What happened here?’ ‘Didn’t you hear me almost choke myself to death?!’ Jess croaked, internally groaning when she felt Joel’s fingers leave her. ‘I almost died.’ ‘That’s for eating pineapple on your pizza,’ Sarah quipped as she turned on her heels and sent a knowing glance to her dad. ‘I warned you, Jess. People like you belong in hell.’ ‘You’re one of those?!’ Joel asked Jess with a grin while the three of them made their way into the living room. ‘She is,’ Sarah agreed as she eased herself onto the couch once more, her eyes sparkling with joy. ‘You don’t know what you’re missing out on!’ Jess defended herself half-heartedly, though she knew her chances persuading pineapple pizza haters to come to the dark side was usually a fruitless task. ‘Nah, it’s disgusting,’ Joel tutted. ‘The state of New York is ruinin’ your taste buds.’ He lowered himself next to Sarah on the couch. ‘Hi, kiddo. What are you watchin’?’ ‘Legally Blonde,’ Sarah said before pulling her father into a hug. ‘It’s pretty cool. You wouldn’t like it.’ ‘Lemme decide f’myself!’ ‘Dad! I’m telling you, it’s a girl’s movie!’

Jess let the pair bicker and went to reheat Joel’s pizza in the oven—a skill she had perfected over the past few years—doing overtime and still having to cook makes a girl creative. She tossed the cold remnants of her meal into the garbage bin; another consequence of nearly suffocating on her beloved pizza was that she had lost her appetite. As she listened to Sarah’s excited chatter and Joel’s low hum, she fetched two beers from the fridge. She knew his favorite—thanks to her dad—and as her hands searched for the bottle opener in the kitchen drawer, her mind drifted to Joel’s pretty eyes and to—

Ugh, he had no reason to be this hot, it was borderline criminal. Especially not after a long day at work, where he undoubtedly had busted his butt ordering others around and hauling stuff across the construction site. Jess peered in the drawer, her mind fixated on the way Joel’s biceps had bulged under his t-shirt. She shouldn’t think of him like that, she really shouldn’t—

‘D’you need some help?’ ‘What?’ she gulped, her hands randomly grabbing a knife, and he hissed at the sting it caused. ‘I was just—’ ‘Carl kept the bottle opener on the side o’the fridge,’ Joel told her as he made his way towards the sink and gestured at the drawer. ‘No need for searchin’ in there.’

Ah. Of course. Her father had been practical about life. He surely would have hated to spend hours searching for a bottle opener. Tears burned behind her eyes and Jess quickly grabbed the object from its place against the fridge. After lifting the cap from both bottles, she offered one beer to Joel.

‘Thank you darlin’,’ Joel rumbled, leaning against the kitchen counter before taking a sip. As he studied her with his dark eyes, Jess busied herself with inspecting the shallow cut she had made in her fingers. It drew some blood and she hissed at the sight. She was many things and possessed many talents, but blood—especially her own—always made her knees weak. And not the good kind of weak.

‘S’just a little cut,’ Joel remarked with a small smirk. ‘Hold it under the tap and you’re fine.’ ‘I’m not one of your men,’ she countered with a huff, eyeing him defiantly. ‘I don’t haul dangerous stuff around all day.’ ‘Glad y’don’t,’ he murmured, while planting his beer on the counter and turning on the faucet. Without ceremony, he got hold of her hand and pushed it under the cold stream. ‘I don’t think you’d be of use at the side,’ he continued. ‘You’d keep hurtin’ y’self.’ Would have t’fire you on your first day….’

That remained to be seen. If Joel stayed out of her way, she would be fine. If not… Well, then she was fucked—and again not the good kind.

Jess observed the water as it poured over their hands and slowly turned into a pleasant temperature. After a short while Joel pulled her fingers close and inspected the damage. ‘S’fine,’ he concluded before shutting off the tap. ‘It doesn’t even bleed, see?’ ‘Are you judging me, Miller?!’ ‘F’course not,’ he replied as he retrieved his hand and dried it on his shirt. Jess—her own fingers still hovering over the sink, dripping with water—couldn’t help but notice that his hands were littered with scars, roughened from his days at work. ‘I don’t believe you,’ she quipped, narrowing her eyes. She reached for the kitchen towel. ‘Remember I’m a highschool teacher, Joel. I can smell lies and omitted truths from a mile away.’ ‘Yeah, I was told to be careful around you,’ he replied with a grin as he leaned against the kitchen counter. ‘Teachin’ these unruly kids like my daughter must be a callin’ or somethin’, I really couldn’t.’ ‘Ah, they’re not that bad,’ Jess said. ‘I can boss them around all day, just like you do with your crew.’ ‘Why’d you think I’d do that, huh?’ ‘I got it from a very reliable source,’ Jess said as she fetched her own beer from the counter and took a sip. As the rich, deep flavor swirled through her mouth, she eyed her father’s friend’s handsome features. ‘I imagine you had the same source,’ she mused with a smile. ‘Tell me… What do you know about me that you probably shouldn’t?’

Joel sipped from his beer and observed her with an amused twinkle in his eyes. There were a thousand things she’d rather not have him know. The first and obvious one was the fact that she had a crush on him, but after that there were a few cringeworthy childhood memories she’d rather forget. It would be embarrassing if Joel knew how she had caught herself in barbed wire during one summer—trespassing farmer Jack’s property had seemed a good idea, until the world turned upside down—or how accidentally had dyed her hair orange instead of blonde.

‘Why are you lookin’ at me? I’m not tellin’ you,’ Joel finally remarked with a vague smile. ‘Promised him not to.’ ‘Aha! So he did tell you stuff he shouldn’t!’ ‘Not much,’ Joel admitted, despite his previous statement not to reveal any of the information he knew. The twinkle in his eyes was gone and now was replaced with genuine concern. ‘Just that he hoped Adam takes good care of you.’

Though Joel couldn’t know about their separation, his revelation still stung. Jess shrugged and bit on her lip. ‘He never told me that.. Did dad—Carl—have his doubts?’ ‘S’not my place to say,’ Joel confessed, his brows furrowing together. He shuffled on his feet and watched Jess sink to her knees to check the oven. The smell of pepperoni pizza filled the kitchen.

‘Almost,’ she commented quietly, her mind still stuck at Joel’s remark. It didn’t surprise her that her father had worried about her relationship with Adam; usually when her mother pressed her to do something—like pursuing a relationship with Adam—her father had been against the idea. Jess had often wondered if this had become her parent’s typical dynamic or if they truly were two opposites in every choice life had to offer.

‘Your dad was somethin’,’ Joel changed the subject. ‘Must be weird f’you, to be back here. With him not bein’ around here.’ ‘Yeah, it is,’ Jess agreed with a heavy heart. She looked up at him through her lashes. ‘I miss him terribly and to be honest I don’t want to be here—no offense of course. It’s just…’ she heaved a weary sigh while her gaze swept through the kitchen. ‘Everything reminds me of him.’ She rose to her feet and retrieved a plate from one of the cabinets. Joel watched her as she placed it in the sink and opened the tap. ‘Heating the plate will keep your pizza warm,’ Jess explained as she waited for the water to get hot. ‘I learned that from a chef I once dated. He was an ass, but he did teach me a useful trick or two.’ ‘Never thought of that,’ Joel murmured. ‘Cold pizza ain’t that bad, why complicate it?’ Jess laughed at that. ‘I bet single dads don’t have time to complicate their dinners,’ she told him as she dried the hot plate and fetched dad’s mittens from a drawer to retrieve the pizza from the oven. ‘Give it a try, Miller,’ she teased as she handed him a mitten and his plate. ‘It won’t kill you.’

Joel, Sarah and Jess spent the evening like a normal family would—at Sarah’s request they watched the rest of Legally Blonde while Joel ate his late dinner. Though the latter wouldn’t tell Jess if the heated plate had made his pizza better, Jess liked to think that it had. After Legally Blonde had ended, Sarah told her father and their new friend about her day at school and Jess was obliged to share the details of her trip from Staten Island to Austin. Jess could not bring herself to explain her breakup with Adam—it would surely result in a tsunami of tears—so when the topic landed on her ex she simply stated that her fiancé had been too busy to help her out. Though Sarah seemed to accept the story right away and chatted about Carl’s tendency to hoard stuff he liked, Jess felt Joel’s eyes burning on her. He probably sensed there was more to it, but he didn’t press her to share. She would probably have to tell him the truth, in time. But for now, his birthday turned out to be the perfect diversion for unwanted questions.

It was around half past ten when Jess found herself leaning against the doorframe of her porch, waving at Sarah who had just ran across the street with her father’s keys. Joel had stepped down from her porch—about to follow his daughter—but had paused at her lawn. ‘She’s a great kid,’ Jess told Joel as they watched Sarah disappear behind the front door. ‘I know a lot of teens, but Sarah’s one of a kind.’ ‘Yeah,’ he agreed quietly as he pushed his hands in the pockets of his jeans. ‘Don’t know what I’d do without her, y’know?’ ‘Well, for one you would not get roasted all the time….’ Joel chuckled. ‘I could do without being called old, yeah…’ He shuffled on his feet. ‘Listen, I wanted to thank you. For takin’ care of her and everythin’. You didn’t have to.’ ‘It’s okay,’ Jess said with a grin. ‘I didn’t mind.’ ‘At least let me pay you back,’ Joel offered, his right hand shifting to his back pocket and retrieving his wallet, which was in a rugged, worn state. ‘No!’ Jess cried out as she raised her hands defensively. ‘Not a chance in hell. We’re good. I have to thank you for the company, especially on your birthday!’ Joel shrugged and his hands fumbled over the worn leather. ‘I wouldn’t have done anythin’ special,’ he confessed. ‘Not after a twelve-hour shift. Probably would have ended up on the couch, watchin’ somethin’ stupid.’ ‘Legally Blonde doesn’t count as stupid?!’ she teased with a smile and was awarded with a cute grin. ‘It was okay,’ Joel concluded. ‘I was enjoyin’ the company, Young.’

There was a short silence in which their eyes met and Jess almost drowned in the beautiful molten chocolate hues. ‘Before I forget; here’s my number,’ Joel murmured as he retrieved a business card from his wallet. ‘Just in case. Y’dad would want me to keep an eye on you.’ ‘Very fancy,’ Jess commented as she took the card—careful not to brush her fingers across his. ‘Was an idea of your dad,’ Joel explained. ‘He told me I needed to be more professional or somethin’.’ ‘Though I also heard you have no trouble finding work,’ Jess replied as she admired the design. It was simple, neat—very Joel. ‘So you could always use the pile my dad probably made you buy to pick up ladies. Chicks like stuff like that.’ Joel laughed at that and Jess reveled in the sound. ‘And about keeping an eye on me…’ she went on as her gaze met his. ‘I can take care of myself, Miller. I’m not a damsel in distress.’ ‘I know that,’ he agreed. ‘Y’dad told me as much. But just… Don’t be stubborn and call me when y’need me. Or swing by.’

‘Even when I have night terrors?’ Jess heard herself question, but by the time she realized how flimsy—and filthy—that must come across, it was too late. She bit on her lip, unsure how she could save herself from her clumsy mouth. Joel didn’t seem taken aback by her comment. He grinned broadly, an amused twinkle in his eye. ‘Yeah, Young,’ he replied in a soft tone. ‘Especially then.’

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Movies to watch when your bored

Priscilla 2023

Black Swan 2010

Maria Antonina 2006

The virgin Suicides 1999

Girl interrupted 1999

Jennifer's Body 2009

Gia 1998

As You Are 2017

Lila 4-ever 2002

Nymphomaniac: vol. i 2013

Goodnight mommy 2022

Closer 2004

Jealousy 2013

Welcome To The Dollhouse 1995

Fish Tank 2009

Run Lola Run 1998

Love Exposure 2008

Love 2015

Young And Beautiful 2013

May 2002

Brick 2005

The Witch 2015

Possession 1981

Promising Young Women 2020

Last Night In Soho 2021

Gone Girl 2014

Ginger Snaps 2000

Halter Skelter 2012

Mona Lisa Smile 2003

American Beauty 1999

Foxfire 1996

I Believe In Unicorns 2014

White Oleander 2002

American Mary 2012

Secretary 2002

The Loved Ones 2009

Ritual 2000

Dead ringers 1988

Dancer In The Dark 2000

Punch Drunk Love 2002

Sleepers 1996

Mysterious Skin 2004

Fight Club 1999

Léon: The Professional 1994

Love Under The Tuscan Sun 2003

Spring Breakers 2012

Plump Fiction 1994

American Psycho 2000

Requiem for a dream 2000

The Basketball Diaries 1995

Perfect Blue 1997