#bless his heart he tries but it’s never his turn with the braincell

[dark-elf-writes]

*stares into the distance like it’s the office*

And she wonders why my family wants to be with her. She’s like this with all of us. Remembers everyone’s birthdays, anniversaries, hobbies, interests, favorite foods, and their partners too. I swear to god she’s been part of my brothers relationships in everything but name for a while now. She literally helps them and their partners plan stuff for each other when they ask (pretty much always if they want it to be good). I mean she literally made my older brother’s wife macaroons because she mentioned wanting to try them but not being able to bc of an allergy one (1) time.

Some people are really too kind for this world and if that’s anyone it’s our beloved tree frog.

[respectfulkitfistosimp]

The Abode

A Kayn lol x reader fanfic part 5 master list

As the weeks passed you missed your friends and family even more, you also wondered what happened in your world. Did you dissapear without a trace or did everyone forget about you? If you did dissapear where they looking for you? The only things that kept your mind off these thoughts was work, even if you had no patients to take care of at night you still stayed in the nursery filling out forms, making training plans and diets or just simply studying, a few acolytes had shown their concerns for your health but you brushed them away with the best lies you could come up with and even if most of them didn't exactly believe you they didn't press on the issue further. You were planning on staying awake for yet another night in the nursery, but when you looked towards the window at the light casted by the sun and the clear sky you felt like taking a small walk outside, something that you had been warned not to do but what was the worst that could happen anyway?

You placed your coat on your shoulders as you walked outside, a soft, chilly breeze brushing away your drowsiness as you started walking, noticing how actually pretty the land around the order's HQ was. It was surrounded by a thick line of trees of various sizes and even colors, if there was something that you loved about Ionia it was how magic everything was in the most literal sense, never in your life would you had expected to see a pair of bright eyes looking at you in the shadows casted by the tree lines, what was even more weird is that one was yellow and the other one was red and the way that they looked at you, apparently finding your creeped out expression funny, sent chills down your spine. You blinked hard and even rubbed your eyes thinking that you were hallucinating from the lack of sleep and when you finally looked at the spot where you saw those eyes a sigh of relief escaped you when they were no longer there.

—Boo—said something in your ear, voice gravely and with a slight pinch of playfulness.

You didn't even turn to look at it because you passed out from the scare right then and there, the only reason why your body hadn't collapsed on the ground was because the person that scared you was holding you up. Kayn put his fingers on the pulse of your neck, sensing that you were still alive and letting out a relieved sigh seconds after, he left you softly on the floor, for some reason the idea of carrying you to the infirmary or just simply inside not even crossing his mind. Your body, on the other hand, was more than relieved to finally be able to momentarily shut down making it so a normal loss of conciousness of less than 5 minutes extended to a full on 6 hour nap and Kayn (bless his heart) stood next to your sleeping body all of this time.

—Great, you killed them—spoke the scythe, tone sounding like this was more of an inconvenience than anything else.

—I didn't Rhaast, I scared them—he looked down at your body, tapping you with the hilt of the scythe and watching you respond to it—see? Not dead.

The scythe only answered with a sigh, the conversation dying with it. Eventually you started to move, seemingly a bit annoyed by the itchi grass on your skin and the bugs crawling over your limbs; first you had scrunched your nose, then started shifting and only when your braincells actually made sparks did you realize that you were laying outside on the grass with no idea of why you were even outside on the first place, your eyes shoot open the next second and as you tried to stare at the sunset sky painted with a beatiful mix of orange and pink tones, the pristine white of the clouds adding to its beauty which was quickly overshadowed by Kayn's masive head looking at you. You grimanced a bit but then decided to let it go, too tired to even want to engange in any sort of banter, only now that you were awake did Kayn lay on the floor next to you, looking at the sky just like you did.

—I thought you were dead—he said.

"I wish I was", you thought, obviously not making that comment after the bad experience you had before when making a similar type of joke.

—It was payback, wasn't it?—you questioned, a light laugh from him being all the confirmation you needed.

You stayed in silence, laying next to each other until the cold of the night was too much to bear for you, however if it was up to Kayn you two could sleep there, after all the guy never wore a shirt so his resistance to the cold was something out of this world. You stood up in one swift motion, not offering your hand to him to help him stand because you knew what it would do to you, instead you started walking towards the order's HQ.

—I'll be leaving for a difficult mission tomorrow—he said right behind you, you didn't even notice when he stood up.

—Okay, good luck—you answered, not sure what else to say.

Kayn nodded, not knowing what to answer either, he might be a master with every weapon out there and fully trained in shadow magic, but when it came to making up small talk with you he was at a complete loss. A thick, uncomfortable silence followed the both of you as you walked inside the building, nodding at each other when you had to take a corner that would separate your path.

The next day came fast, or maybe at a normal speed since this night you had actually gotten some sleep, either way that day you decided to see everyone who was going to join Kayn's mission off. You stood in front of the door, a step behind Zed as he gave them a brief run down and some unexpected words of encouragement, as you looked at the blades of grass you noted a soft layer of frost on them, then you saw the clouds coming out of each acolyte's breathing, in that second you knew that whoever returned alive they would most like end up sick because of the cold. While going over your internal monologue Zed stopped talking, everyone turned around and walked off except you, who stood on that front door, freezing your toes off as you saw them dissapear into the forest, next you looked at the sunrise, the blue and yellow of the sky making the frozen grass shine. You sighed before remembering the cloud coming out of your mouth, then did it a couple more times simply because you were mesmerized by it before going back inside, working as you usually did until for some reason you were told to go somewhere and as the best employee of the month you went there... You went to a battle field, one filled with corpses and blood and everything that you knew would make you spend a fortune on a therapist to even begin to comprehend the amount of bloodshed and death, lucky for you however by the time you got there the battle was already over, however that didn't mean that you didn't have to work on the few that survived. That's when you saw Kayn covered in blood, you hoped that it wasn't his blood and just a second later you raised your voice to get him to come with you.

Kayn was already walking towards you though, who else could he trust to take care of him? He was happy to get treated by you, however he wasn't so happy of the scolding that you gave him while treating him, his head was already a mess on every sense of the word, from physical to psychological, it casted a fog on his brain that only got thicker by the sense of bloodlust that permeated his senses, this caused for him to not even think about it before he put his hand on the back of your neck and with barely no force at all he forced your lips on his. Your brain took longer to register the kiss than what it actually laster for, the muscle memory of your limbs started to work on his injuries, your blank expression was an accurate depiction of the state your mind was in. Neither of you said a word, on your part it was because of how absolutely shocked you were and in Kayn's part it was not only because he was satisfied to not get scolded by you but also because he enjoyed that dumb expression on your face.

[2-cute-4-school]

𝘯𝘤𝘵 𝘥𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘮 𝘭𝘦𝘯𝘥𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘪𝘳 𝘩𝘰𝘰𝘥𝘪𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘪𝘳 𝘴/𝘰 𝘥𝘰𝘦𝘴𝘯’𝘵 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦

requested by the national cutie pie @heartyyjeno​

Mark Lee

he can be a bit oblivious sometimes bless his soul꒰๑˃͈꒵˂͈๑꒱୭

so he’s kinda clueless as why tf you’re so pouty 

has he said anything stupid earlier? forgotten any important date?? or... even worse

ARE YOU ON YOUR PERIOD?? (ｼ;ﾟДﾟ)ｼ  ᵉᵛᵉʳʸᵒⁿᵉ ʰᵃˢ ᵗʰᵉᶦʳ ᵗʰᵉᶦʳ ᵒʷⁿ ᵖᵉʳᶦᵒᵈ ʸᵒᵘ ᶜᵃⁿ’ᵗ ᶜʰᵃⁿᵍᵉ ᵐʸ ᵐᶦⁿᵈ ˢᵒʳʳʸ

he’s too nervous to even prod at you rn

especially after a trainee who just happens to be wearing his hoodie passes by and you-

did you just growl?!?? ( ⚆ _ ⚆ )

but you’re his baby and you’re just SO deflated and he HATES seeing you anything but happy and lively so he just can’t stand by and watch you so upset cuz his lil heart hurts too (๑◕︵◕๑)

“babe, are you uh alright?”

“yeah, just a little bit cold” *trying to subtly hint him*

“oh! that’s not good, you should have dressed warmer, should i go ask manager-hyung to turn up the heating in the practice room??”

 ‘maybe i should just set your ass on fire to warm up’ (►˛◄’!)

“or do you maybe want my hoodie?? it should be enough so you won’t be cold anymore, where did i... ohhhhh”

*light bulb turning on above his head* (〇o〇；)

“it’s fine mark, it’s not like you love me anyway it’s fine i should have seen this coming” *loud fake sobbing in your hands* *mark panic*

“no no baby come on-”

“let’s just get the divorce papers, mark lee!!!!”

“but we’re not married-” *sobbing intensifies* “i’m sorry, I’M SORRY!!! i didn’t mean to!! here, just a second!!” (´⊙ω⊙`)！

this specimen just took off his shirt and draped it over you in the middle of the practice room

“mark, wtf are you doing?!?? i was only kidding!!”

“how was i supposed to know, what if you were seriously upset-”

“hyung, can you help-”  *chenle slams door closed* *dolphin screams* “you’re paying for my eyeball removal surgery, you nasties!!”

“chenle NO”

Huang Renjun

my man here catches on pretty quickly what your pout is about

you didn’t make it exactly hard to notice either (；¬д¬)

“y/n, want some ice cream?”

“no, i’m cold, you can shove it up yo ass and share with dear [redacted]”

jesus i wonder why your s/o is mad renjun

he’s not sure how to approach the situation at first, worried that he might get a tube of ice shoved somewhere he wouldn’t want it to ゞ◎Д◎ヾ

he decides to just be himself read as blunt

“baby come oooon, i can ask them to give it back”

“no, then i’ll seem like a possessive bitch” (Θ︹Θ)ს

“don’t call yourself that!! but then should i just run back to the dorms and get another hoodie?”

“no, i missed you this week, i don’t want you to leave”

“then you can just come with me?” (≖^≖๑ )ﾌ

“but i’m too lazy to get up” same reader same

renjun : ఠ ͟ಠ then wth DO YOU WANT ?!!!?!!

your soul renjun

he’s a bit lost and you’re kinda under the weather too and he HATES it because you’re his kitten and he CAN’T and WON’T allow you to feel anyhting but like absolute royalty with him ೕ(⁍̴̀◊⁍̴́ฅ)

so he just drapes himself over your back, wrapping his arms tightly around you, caging you in a warm embrace and nuzzling his cheek into yours

“who needs a hoodie when they’ve got a junnie??!?!” (˃̵ᴗ˂̵ ๑)

how could anyone stay mad when a cutie like renjun just curls himself around you and pulls you flush against himself, wrapping his limbs around you and peppering kisses everywhere in reach

you’re basically purring in content at this how could you not 」(￣▽￣」)

depending on how tired the both of you are, you might qualify for a good ol’ nap cuddled up against renjun 

but don’t let this fool you

you AIN’T gona catch him making the same mistake again

he’s asking you first about absolutely anything

“no renjun, i don’t need the last of your toilet paper, why do you even- you know what, don’t answer that, just go take a shit in peace” Σ(-᷅_-᷄๑)

Lee Jeno

we all know jeno is too much of a sweetheart to say ‘no’ (๑′ᴗ‵๑)

he might be freezing himself and he’d still give his hoodie away to the first person who asks learn how to say NO kids

so now you’re both freezing and on top of everything you’re upset too

that’s a DOUBLE KILL for sweet babie jeno (๑◕︵◕๑)

“babe i’m sorry how was i supposed to know you don’t like them??”

“it’s not even that, jeno, you’re literally shivering!! why would you give it if you’re cold too?”

and that’s when jeno’s bf sathelit sprung into action

“wait... ‘too’?? are you cold, my baby??!??!?” (ʘᗩʘ’)

“no, wait, i mean yes, but that’s not-”

“i’ll be back in a second” he isn’t even kidding

he comes back with a blanket AND heating pads (that he doesn’t miss a second to clutch to your cheeks and then coo at your fish face)

“where did you get these from?” *suspicious*

he tells you he borrowed stole them from hyuck by politely asking for them threatening with a flex of his arm while eye smiling the entire time hyuck stood no chance ( ⚆ ᴗ ⚆ ) *nervous chuckle*

but jeno allows you no debating time before he wraps you in the blanket like a lil cutie patootie WARM burrito and leaves a *smooch* to your forehead ( ˘ ³˘)♥

you can spend an eternity arguing with him that you should take turns since he’s cold too, he isn’t taking ANY OF IT

his bubs isn’t allowed to be cold and he wants you to forget about who he lent his hoodie to too

the only way you can get him to relent is refusing to stay cocooned in it

“y/n, wear it or you’ll catch a cold!!” ( •̀ω•́ )σ

“sorry to burst your bubble, but you can and will catch a cold too!!”

that’s how you found yourself sandwiched between jeno’s arms, suffocating from both his bodt warmth and the blanket enveloping THE BOTH of you

best sauna would 110% recommend ୧( ⁼̴̶̤̀ω⁼̴̶̤́ )૭

Lee Donghyuck

my man here knows EXACTLY what he’s doing once *that person* asks him for his hoodie with a flirty smile

he lends it over with that shit eating grin but not without watching from the corner of his eye as you deflated like a loney baloney ( ◞᷄દ◟᷅ )

pretends to not notice your pout and lack of answers to his remarks

“y/n, wanna order chinese tonight?”

sweet, but not on my watch asshole *silence* (˵¯͒⌢͗¯͒˵)

“i’ll take that as a yes, i’ve been craving some seaweed soup”

*eye twitch*

‘fine u lil booger two can play at this game’ (•̀o•́)ง

you leave the room and return... wrapped up in MARK’S sweater and plop down back next to hyuck proudly (ฅ⁍̴̀◊⁍̴́)

he tenses up and turns to you

“y/n” ooooh damn you’re in deep shit

*you bat your eyelashes innocently* “yes my dear?”

“you stink, can you move further away?”

you... did not... JUST HEAR THAT??!?!!? (ﾉꐦ ⊙曲ఠ)ﾉ彡┻━┻

but you get up and walk with your tail between your legs to the other side of the room and curl up in a ball of failure

you both do your own things insilence until-

*sniffle* *hiccup* *SNIFFLE*

“y/n?” *silence*”baby??” *hiccup*

oh no oh no NO NO, hyuck’s baby ain’t crying on his watch (╯’□’)╯

he DASHES to your side and envelops you in his arms while cooing apologies and sweet nothings in your ear

“come on baby, you know i didn’t mean it, i just want your attention and your attention only and i only meant that mark’s hoodie stinks, never you, you’re my baby, you can’t-” ヾ( •́д•̀ ;)ﾉ

and then your shoulders start shaking and hyuck starts to actually worry until your sobs turn into... giggles?? hold up, WHAT??

he turns you around just to see you in a fit of giggles, the only tears present are the ones building up in your eyes from laughter

“oh you think you’re smart, don’t you??” (⁎⁍̴̀﹃ ⁍̴́⁎)♡

ATTACC OF TICKLES FOR YOU

Na Jaemin

another sweetheart tbh who wouldnt be able to refuse out of courtesy

but he just KNOWS he fcked up the moment you turn away when he leans in to kiss you (︶︹︺) ╯ ( ് દ ് )

but he ain’t giving up so easily

no matter how upset you are, depriving him of his dose of kisses? federal crime!!!! CRUELTY!!!!!!! ╰[ ಠ Ĺ̯ಠ]╯

so he keeps on pushing his affections on you

a clutching back hug, a rushed kiss wherever he is able to land it considering your struggle to avoid him, a nuzzle against your cheek, a pinch to your cheeks, a failed attempt to lockyour hands together

my man here tries not to show disappointment whenever you succesfully escape his ♡ 𝓵𝓸𝓿𝓮 ♡   

jaemin, grumbling: “you and jisungie, a couple of hooligans, i’ll leave you on the welcome mat tonight for this” (҂⌣̀_⌣́) he won’t he loves you too much, he can’t fall asleep if he’s not 110% sure you’re well fed and happy

but he still babies you to no end

“come on my baby, what should i do so you forgive me hm?”( *¯ ³¯*)♡

you, an entire baby: *huff* “so now you care huh? go ask or no, go TAKE CARE of [redacted]” 

jaemin’s last braincell performing swan lake on thin ice male version 2020 be like ₍₍ ◝( ･’ω’･ )◟ ⁾⁾

so he sighs and leaves the room

so NOW you’re worrying that mayyyybe you pushed him a bit too far

but before you even get the chance to walk down the hallway in your mighty search for your boyfriend, everything suddenly goes black

no you didn’t pass out or did you

jaemin just creeped up on you and ENGULFED you in a blanket hug for which he DEFINITELY didn’t run a marathon to buy༼つ ் ▽ ் ༽つ

when you finally manage to worm your head out of the fluffy cocoon he engulfed you in, your words were still muffled

“nana?? how did you even-???”

he just hugs you tighter and cuts off your questions

“shhh, all that matters is that you are ABSOLUTELY ADORABLE and i am maybe perhaps forgiven??”  ◕ ‿ ◕ 

how could you ever refuse this precious soul

Zhong Chenle

so i can see one(1) scenario in which he would lend his hoodie to someone he SPECIFICALLY knows you don’t fancy

if you had a let’s say disagreement before and we all know he can be PETTY big time sooo basically he’d do it just to spite you ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ

and the lil shiz looks SO PROUD of himself

but you’re not letting the brat win we ain’t no losers _へ__(‾◡◝ )>

so you just creep up behind him and stick your glacier hands up his shirt and rest them on his warm back

when i’m telling you he broke the record for the highest jump and most likely shattered any windows in the vicinity ༻(〃ຶ⌂〃ຶ)

“y/n!!!! keep your ice cubes to yourself!!”

“but i’m cold”

“your cold, your problem”

“watch me say the same thing when jaemin’s chasing you around with a wooden ruler” （；¬＿¬)

things settle down after that

or so he thought!!!!! (งಠل͜ಠ)ง never let your guard down lele sigh

another sneak attack to make sure chenle gets a SOUR taste of absolutely pure pettiness so he gets sick of it himself lol

this time a bitch ain’t joking

you shove your entire head under his shirt and then slither yourself so the top of your head pops out of chenle’s shirt collar let’s hope chenle made the wise choice of wearing a loose shirt so you both won’t suffocate

so you just blink up at him like (◕ᴥ◕)

and chenle is shrieking the entire time sigh

and while you’re too cute for him, its not exactly comfortable for either of you so he pats your head and begs asks you to get out of his shirt(?)

“am i getting your hoodie then?”

“i can’t just barge in and ask for it back”

“alright them i’m suffocating you FUN” (╯✧∇✧)╯

“i’m buying you an entire store of hoodies, JUST GET.OUT!!!”(;≧皿≦）

you have to restrain him for actually going on a shopping spree cuz he LOVES spoiling you but he pays in cuddles while you’re snuggling in your favourite hoodie of his

Park Jisung

confused babie /(@ﾟﾍﾟ@) a mood 

he probably lent his hoodie cause he was too shy to refuse and didn’t even know you don’t like the person he gave it to

and then he’s clueless when you’re pouty ｢(ﾟ<ﾟ)ﾞ??

jisung: “do you want some water??”

you: *grumbling visibly upset* ( ｰ̀εｰ́ )

jisung, at a safe distance away from you, scratching his head, rethinking life choices: “...okay, maybe not. how about choco milk?”

he keeps an eye on you but other than that he’s LOST lol

that’s when the ✨𝓱𝔂𝓾𝓷𝓰𝓼✨ kick in

emergency contact momma jaemin is the first person jisung calls once he escaped to the ‘bathroom’

“jisung, you know i love you, BUT ARE YOU DUMB?? HOW COULD YOU- blahblahblah” my man is listening to an entire rant about how to treat your partner well 101 (۶* ‘ꆚ’)۶”

now that he knows the theory, he needs the practice

but you might already worry that he fell in the toilet with how long he’s been gone for god forbid you fall into that dark void

so he calls chenle

“chenle, i’m treating you to hotpot if you bring me a blanket or hoodie in less than 5 minutes”

“add in some steak and it’s a deal” ( ✧≖ ͜ʖ≖)

“i’m so selling your soul for a piece of gum, FINE!! just be quick!!”

THIS BOI RIGHT HERE!! A TREASURE!!!! he would step on his honour just to make sure his bubs is hapyy ˭̡̞(◞⁎˃ᆺ˂)◞*✰

so after he excuses himself again to retrieve the blanket from chenle

he BURRITO WRAPS you in it and then sits down next to your confused but undeniably happy form and pats your head nervously while he rambles you’re still his most sought after for of comfort no matter what

“i’m sorry for being a bad boyfriend, i should have realized you’d be cold too and that i should always put you first and i-”

you cut him off with a chaste kiss to his cheek which definetely doesn’t leave him speechless and tomato red in the cheeks (๑♡⌓♡๑)

“it’s okay, i was just being dramatic, you should always put yourself first tho, okay baby??”

baby is malfunctioning but he still nods mindlessly and kisses your cheek back ( ᵅั ᴈ ᵅั;)

[local-ground-apple]

Thank you for your writings ^0^~ May I request for headcanons when Riddle, Ruggie, Kalim, Vil and Lilia are dating a gn! Reader that is in the same dorm as them?

Thank you for your request!!

Sorry it took me so long, I hope you will enjoy it~~~

🥀 you have to abide the rules imposed on students by Riddle. Obviously, you do a bad job in it and even though your boyfriend is a dorm leader you more than often forget about one of many regulations. Riddle won’t admit it, but he sometimes lets it slip and pretends he hadn’t seen anything, 

🥀  Riddle tried to teach you all the rules and you truly tried to memorise them, yet it was futile

,,It’s just 810 rules! It’s not that hard to remember!” “Well, it is, if your memory is shitty”

🥀 you and Adeuce are absolute trio of chaos driving Riddle insane. May it be breaking a teapot, painting roses pink by accident or dyeing hedgehogs, you are the reason behind Rosehearts’ headache, 

🥀 you clearly became a master in avoiding the rules or finding loop-holes in them. Riddle knows you’re doing something wrong, yet he can’t punish you cause technically you hadn’t broke the regulations. Yet, your victorious smirk tells him otherwise. Sometimes he wonders why weren’t you sorted to Octavinelle,

🥀 you and Cater are besties. You often help him take perfect pictures for his magicam account or trick some poor, unfortunate first-years into painting the roses. Trey technically doesn’t mind your mischievous self as long as you don’t disturb his kitchen, 

🥀 Riddle is more than happy to help you with subjects you don’t excel at. He’s doing his best to explain you the topic, yet each time your eyes fall on his lips, you barely can focus,

🥀 Riddle tries to be a bit lenient with you, yet sometimes he gets annoyed with you and expects a bit more than from other students. You are his second half and he thinks that at least you should try to be an example for students, 

🥀 Riddle often adjustes your tie, while you gently press your lips to his, always making him blush slightly, 

🐾 oh, finally a person whi can help him deal with Leona and his antics. He truly appreciates your even tiniest help. May it be a simply pat on the back, gentle comforting kiss or dragging Leona’s ass to the class, Ruggie thanks you, 

🐾 Ruggie often feels like he’s the one doing the most work in the whole dorm, so any help from you is very much welcomed. However, he didn’t expect that you would organise Savanaclaw students and clearly state their duties and tasks, 

🐾 you both are often seen playing pranks on poor, unfortunate Savanaclaw students. You are truly unstoppable with Ruggie’s unique magic and your  cunningness. Even Leona remarked your powerful duo,

🐾 speaking of giant lion, you both scold him for skipping classes and constantly napping, literally all the time, 

🐾 oh and you attempt to wake up Leona. That turns out to be challenging and hazardous task, 

🐾 sometimes you both pick up dandelions, unfortunately feeling on you both pair of inquisitive eyes belonging to no one other than creepy hunter. Whenever you and Ruggie see Rook, you both rapidly walk in the other direction, 

🐾  Ruggie adores when after a long day of school and handling Leona’s moods and antics, you pat and scratch his ears. Please, show him all the affection and attention you can, he will gladly return the favor, 

🦂 you and Kalim are driving Jamil insane. You’re both careless, cheerful spirits who don’t really think of the consequences of their actions beforehand. You both wreck chaos accidentally and are master procrastinators world has ever known,

🦂 Jamil thinks you’re useless, but still more useful than Kalim,

🦂 you and Kalim often procrastinate on your tasks and homework. You often try to study together and prepare for exams, but since you both are blessed with attention of the goldfish, you end up being distracted even by leaves or each other lips,

🦂 you often fly on magical carpet in the middle of the night (after making sure that Jamil is sound asleep). Kalim shows you and teaches you various constellations while you’re floating in the air. You both adore staring at star-studded sky and giggling together, 

🦂 you both are unstoppable party animals, who truly believe that dancing and singing are the best cure to alleviate all your worries. Kalim often throws parties and you spend the whole night in each other arms dancing to the music. The dancefloor is yours, 

🦂 Jamil tolerates you, but in his eyes you and Kalim are “dumb and dumber duo” (guess he hadn’t truly experienced the power of Adeuce’s one braincell)

🦚 being in Pomefiore entails following multiple, strict routines. You often fail to do them, but Vil appreciates your efforts even if he scolds you harshly. He is still more lenient with you than with Epel and usually refrains from addressing you as “potato”,

🦚 dating Vil means that you’re expected to maintain a certain image and look absolutely impeccable all the time. The stares are always on you and you more than often feel exhausted and anxious. But you have Vil who may appear cold at first, yet in private he showers you in praises and makes sure you feel appreciated,

🦚 you and Epel are probably besties who hit it off immediately (yes, Vil sometimes is jealous). You two gossip a lot, study together and try to avoid as many of the beauty routine steps as you both can,

🦚 you often stand up for Epel whenever Vil bullies him,

🦚 even after a while, you are certainly not accustomed to Rook randomly popping up and scaring the hell out of you while yelling random French words. You doubt you would ever get used to it,

🦚 you are surely at least decent in making potions, so you and Vil often work together on enhancing some recipes and preparing lethal poisons or normal potions. He’s more than happy to tutor you and help you out, of course, if you try your best, 

🦚 you quickly became a smoothie master and Vil absolutely loves it. You prepare them almost everyday, making sure to pick fresh, ripe fruits and vegetables. You both try different recipes and share a smoothie together each morning, 

🦚 Rook stalks you, for sure, 

🦇 you both aren’t allowed in the kitchen. Malleus made that crystal clear after one time you two wanted to celebrate your anniversary and bake something, it ended in fire,

🦇 you and Silver immediately hit it off and Lilia is more than happy that you and his self-proclaimed son are getting along well. Silver had hard time accepting you as old man’s significant other. You’re close to his age and he knows that Lilia is way older,

,,Isn’t old man too old for you? You’re young, you should date someone your age” “Like you, Silver?” “I DIDN’T SUGGEST THAT”

🦇 either way, he’s happy that his self-proclaimed bat father is in love with you,

🦇 Malleus awkwardly ships you both while Sebek was suspicious and before he accepted you, it took a while and lot of yelling. You and SIlver often team up and argue against Sebek. Silver provides arguments and you just yell, 

🦇 you and Lilia both stay up until night to study, while feasting on tomato juice. Mostly, it’s you who study, cause Lilia has lived long enough to know everything that’s inside textbooks. He likes tutoring you in history, always telling you some of his adventures back in those times, 

🦇 when you saw his picture in history textbook, you were more than stunned

,,OH, that’s truly you?” “Ufufufu~~mayhaps Little One”

🦇 you two often have tea parties together (it took a while to explain to Malleus why he wasn’t invited). 

🦇 you will absolutely never get used to Lilia appearing out of nowhere hanging upside and giving you a heart attack. He often playfully brush his lips against yours in reverse kiss, before he pulls away with a sly grin,

[peach-pops]

Hi! Can I requests a HC with Suga, Kageyama, and Noya where they go into Ukais store and they completely fall head over heels for the girl behind the register ( she can be related to Ukai or just works there for him)

This is my first request! Make sure you guys like/comment/reblog if you enjoyed it and requests are open! 

Suga, Kageyama, and Noya develop a crush on Ukai’s new employee 

��Sugawara

One day after practice, Suga finds himself heading to Ukai’s store with Daichi and Asahi because they’ve been craving those steamed pork buns and since it was Daichi’s turn to pay for food, it was an offer he couldn’t refuse 

He’s definitely an advocate for “Free food is the best food” 

#sugardaddydaichi

The boys walk into Sakanoshita and Suga is the first to notice a new girl standing behind the counter who is reading the newspaper with her legs propped up just like a mini Ukai

Instead of a cigarette between her lip, she has a stick of chocolate pocky in her mouth 

Suga thinks you are SO cute and he can’t stop staring at you but once you look up from your newspaper to lock eyes with him, he averts his gaze and continues to walk forward, only to bump into one of the shelves by accident 

“ Woah, you okay suga?” Daichi asks as he turns around to face his friend

“ GAH I’m fine!”

Suga hears you let out a small giggle as you went back to your newspaper and pretended to act uninterested in the boy, even though you knew fully well that he was reallllllly cute

Daichi is a smart boy and he can clearly tell that Suga is completely flustered over you but decides to say nothing for now while Asahi is deciding between which flavor drink he should get 

He’s oblivious, aren’t all aces? 

The boys grab their buns and head over to the counter where you greet them extra politely because you are an underpaid customer service worker who is just genuinely nice a cute boy is in front of you and you wanna make a nice impression

“ Okay, you’re all set,  is there anything else I can do for you guys?” You asked sweetly as Daichi looks over to Suga who’s cheeks are getting flushed

Daichi gets Asahi’s attention and nods over to the door,” We’ll be outside Suga, don’t take too long.” 

Suga’s eyes practically are pleading with Daichi saying “ Please don’t leave me I think I’m choking on my own tongue” but Daichi just laughs and walks out with a confused Asahi trailing behind him 

Suga just tries to calm himself down because he knows the goal is to make a nice impression and hopefully set up a date so he can see you again 

“ From the way you were sitting, I imagine you’re related to Ukai? ”

Suga immediately regrets this approach because now he sounds like a weird stalker but you don’t think anything of his question

“ Mhm, I’m his niece Y/N, how do you know him?” 

He replays your name out loud and for some reason it makes him smile even more

You being Ukai’s niece doesn’t really make Suga panic even though the thought of crushing on his coaches niece seems like he is crossing some sort of moral line

Suga tells you that he plays volleyball for Karasuno and that your uncle is also his coach which lights up your face 

“ No kidding, what a small world! I would love to come out and cheer you on. When’s the next game?”

Suga short circuits for a second because you specifically said you would cheer him on instead of the team as a whole

“ S-sure! There’s one next week if you want to come .ANDmaybewecangetsomethingtoeatafter!” 

“ Sounds like a plan, its a date,” You smiled as Suga nods excitedly before rushing out of the store without another word 

“ Did I just hear her say that Ukai is her uncle?” Asahi asked as the three of them walked down the street

Suga nods and blabs on about his interaction with you but Asahi and Daichi look at each other the whole time as they think of how screwed Suga will be once Ukai finds out

➣Kageyama

Kageyama never really heads to Ukai’s store unless he’s with his teammates but one day when he’s out jogging, he forgets his water bottle so he decides to stop by Sakanoshita to grab a drink since he knows he won’t be able to run much longer in this heat 

He steps into the store and he’s blessed with not only the blasting AC but the sight of a girl around his age refilling the drinks in the fridge

Kags can only see the side of your face but even then, he feels his heart skip a beat 

He’s never felt anything like this before so he’s convinced he’s about to have a heart attack but then the unsettling thought hits him as he’s just standing there in the middle of the store with his wallet out 

“ She’s really pretty” and Kageyama doesn’t even realize he’s said this OUT LOUD until you turn around and give him a shy smile

“ Um, thank you, you too”

Kageyama wants to just run out of the store because he is so embarrassed and he can feel the back of his neck and ears heat up as he contemplates leaving

And that’s EXACTLY what he does!!!!

The dude just leaves without buying anything and decides to just run back home because he is MORTIFIED 

You’re kinda bummed out because “damn, I scared another one off this week” but you realize that he dropped his wallet as he was sprinting out so you knew he’d be back

You didn’t look through his wallet, all you did was put it in one of the drawers at the register and continued on with your day as usual 

Just kidding, you totally looked through it and founds his Karasuno school ID and when you saw he was a first-year too, you mentally gave yourself a high five

Kageyama on the other time is freaking out because not only did he lose his wallet, he is so sure that the last time he had it was at Ukai’s store which means he has to see you again

He decides to wait until later that night to show up because he thinks maybe Ukai will be there instead-but sure enough when he shows up, you’re still sitting behind the counter and this time, he can see your whole face as you’re doing homework 

And his heart stops when he sees that you’re wearing a Karasuno school uniform because he could’ve sworn he would’ve recognized someone as pretty as you around the hallways

He’s never felt this way about any girl before and now, he slightly regretted not listening to Tanaka’s advice on how to pick up girls because he was felt so lost on what to do 

You could feel someone staring at you but when you turned your head up, you found yourself almost glad to see him

“ Oh hey Tobio! Did you come back for something?” 

His brain short circuits for the millionth time because hardly anyone calls him by his first name and he figures you probably went through his wallet 

Kageyama sheepishly nods as he heads over to the counter. You don’t even understand how hard it is for Kageyama to even talk to you

Cause granted, he’s talked to girls before like Kiyoko and Yachi but never a girl he was interested in because until now, he never even found himself attracted to girls 

You hand him his wallet as you defend yourself, saying that you only went through it to find his address so you could return it after your shift  

he apologizes over and over again on how much it was a burden for you to keep his wallet for the day

All you could do was laugh at how absurd this whole situation was and your laugh made Kageyama tense up because even your laugh was attractive 

He made sure to keep that in his head though 

Kageyama doesn’t know why his feet are practically cemented in front of you but he just doesn’t want to leave

He makes up any excuse and looks down at your math homework and thinks of an idea

“ Oh, do you need help with that?”

And Kageyama feels so stupid because why the hell did he just offer to help you with math homework when he only has one working braincell

You look down at your homework and back up at him,” You know this stuff?”

Kageyama looks at you before swallowing hard and shakes his head,” No…I’m actually really bad”

You giggle at his attempt at trying to be helpful but you nod back towards your homework,” Well don’t worry, I have math under control...If you want I can tutor you sometime?”

Kageyama almost says yes way too quickly before he pretends to think it over in his head and happily accepts your offer

You smile back at him before grabbing a sticky note and scribbling your name and number on a piece of paper,” Call me whenever, yeah?” 

You know that face Kageyama makes where his smile is super weird and squiggly? Well thats the exact face he has as he takes the piece of paper and tells you goodnight

And you can bet everything you have that he immediately rushes home and pulls out his homework just so he can have an excuse to call you up 

➣Nishinoya 

Nishinoya frequently visits Ukai’s store even if it’s out of the way because he likes to see a familiar face 

And also tries to bargain a “family discount” to which Ukai always denies him 

So one night Noya feels a sudden craving for literally anything that isn’t within his own house and he just decides to go drop by Sakanoshita to annoy Ukai out of a free bag of chips

“ Oi Ukai-” Noya stops in his tracks when he sees a girl around his age carrying a big box of products out from the back of the store

He is completely SMITTEN for you right away and in the back of his mind he’s like Kiyoko who? 

He had been going to Ukai’s for a long time but he had never saw you around before so already his mind was thinking of who you could be 

“ She’s too pretty to be Ukai’s daughter- he isnt even married why would he have a daughter-unless his wife left him with a baby and that’s why he’s grumpy all the time- wait but aren’t babies made by having-”

Noya kinda snaps out of it as you let out a small grunt while you’re trying to balance the two boxes on top of each other

Lets be real, Noya is the number one women respecter so when he sees you somewhat struggling, he rushes over and helps take some of the weight off of you

You could feel your load lighten but you still keep your hand on the box,“ I got it, it’s fine!”

“ No, please let me help! You’re too pretty to carry heavy things, you need a big strong man to help!” 

He didn’t mean for it to sound so unfeminist because again, he loves women as much as Hinata loves volleyball but he just didn’t want you to hurt yourself

You guide him where to set the boxes and they’re way heavier than Noya anticipated but since he wanted to impress you, he tried to play it off like it wasn’t even that heavy 

“ Thanks for the help, I hate making multiple trips” You said as you crouched down and opened up the boxes. When you look up at the boy for the first time, you feel your heart skip a beat because duh, cute stranger alert and Noya was feeling the exact same way 

“ I would do it again in a heartbeat,” Noya smiled and introduced himself and when you said your full name, Noya felt like his mind had exploded

“ Woah! I know him, he’s my volleyball coach- I’m Karasuno’s libero-that’s the school I go to- and he owns the store- but you probably already know that- I’ve never seen you around before, are you new?” 

When Noya gets excited, he has a tendency to talk people’s ear off but you found it so amusing and almost endearing 

“ Yep, today’s my first day. It’s been pretty hectic but it keeps me pretty busy for the most part.”

“ You know, I’m here all the time so I practically own the store myself. If you need any manly assistance, I could help you- like right now- do you want me to stock these chips? The cheesy ones are my favorite what about you?” 

You didn’t want to burden him but after trying to convince him you were fine doing it by yourself, you just gave up and decided that it would be quicker with him by your side

It would’ve taken you about an hour to stock whatever was left but with Noya’s help, you two managed to get it done in 20 minutes. While you closed up the shop, he even offered to walk you home because “ someone as pretty as you shouldn’t walk home without a bodyguard” 

You happily accepted your offer because hellooooo any excuse to hang out with him longer worked for you! 

When you got to your house, you gave him a friendly kiss on the cheek to thank him and for extra measure, you pulled out a bag of cheesy chips from your coat

Noya practically fell to his knees once you closed your front door and he was simping so hard for you that everytime he wasn’t busy with volleyball, he would close up the shop with you and walk you home

[khaleesiofalicante]

Γεια σου!! Εδώ είμαι.. 13 ώρες μετά την κυκλοφορία του νέου κεφαλαίου 😂

Tbh its been a pretty tiring day. I was aprox. 12 hours sitting in front of a computer with classes, assigments and extra work, SO I'M REALLY IN NEED OF A DISTRACTION

Good news its that I finished ALMOST all my assigments, so I'm a little bit relaxed

Bad news its that I thought my grandmother was already leaving (she just gets on my nerves a lot, nobody can blame me) but guess what?? SHE'S NOT!! 🙂 She just keeps complaing about everything 24/7, gives my mom a really hard time and indirectly insults me sometimes 😂 yesterday she told my mom if she ever thought she'll have a "hairless" daughter (my hair is like... Lexi style and David's lenght for context) and I was beside her like... 🤨dude...??

Anyways, lets read this:

"The two adults reluctantly pulled apart and turned to her." Sizzy!!! They are just iconic!!! 💙

"Georgia wondered if the woman would let her run some experiments on it." I...don't thinks so..

✨Thank you for reminding me that I love Sister Emelia ✨

"She hoped no one else would die. She was running out of white clothes to wear." Mmm, do I tell her?

Izzy must feel so bad!! She is a badass and amazing person she deserves a break!!

“The nothingness,” Georgia finished. (OH MY GOD OH MY GOD. LIKE THE PARABATAI INCIDENT!!!

Its Lake Lyn!!! Idris!! The Cohort!!

“We need to go so I can strangle Zara with my own hands.” Please do honey!!

“I’m so sorry, my love,” he said again. “It’s Lexi.” (but why hast she felt anything???)

Tessa and Jem!!

But she would have known!! Whats happening??

“I can’t feel her.” Shit.

"Because life that is taken cannot be returned. But a soul…souls are never entirely lost. They can be found. They can be returned." OH shit. Then they can save her. And also Rafael!!

"You must call out to her. Call out to your parabatai. Call out to her soul." OH MY GODS!!

Jace just breaks me😭😭

Wow. That scene. They all.. Bdisbdibdbsjs wow. THE PARABATAI OATH!! AND JEM SAYING THE LAST PART. I'M CRYING 🥺🥺 It may be one of my favorites💙💙💙

"Selena attacked me.” Oh fuck. There goes another problem...

Michael seams sus... REALLY SUS!!

“Dearest,” Michael said gently. “You have given me the world. You gave me everything.” (I'm getting mixed signals!! I dont know what to think!!!)

OH SHIT.

“Selena,” Magnus said, his voice broken. “What did you do to Rafael?” (NO. IT WASNT HER!!)

“Stop it!” Aunt Izzy snapped. “You are all terrifying her.” (THANK YOU IZZY. I LOVE YOU!!)

Yup. Julian is still scary

Selena tried to get off the bed and her father’s hand went to his seraph blade. “Daddy?” Selena asked hoarsely. (OK, but why was that so sad. It just... Wow. It broke my heart) 

“You didn’t investigate the murders at all.” OMG. Like, i took the posibility that maybe Selena was the one possesed, but this is a whole new level

OMG she told them about Michael!! I mean putting it like that it does sound shitty...

Not the Mortal sword!! Fuck!!

I dont fucking know what i did to my keyboard for smashing it. It's all weird!!

Yey!! Back to normal lmaoo😂

"One of their children was dead, one had died and come back and the other was possibly possesed" YEAH, they deserve a break fam!!

“I told you not to do this!” Izzy yelled. “She is a child for god’s sake!” ( my beloved. The only one with braincells!!)

Yes to Magnus saving Jace!!

Clary is having none of it!!

Its Belial!!  @totalbookmaniac we were right!!

"Alec would pay the price, whatever it took, to bring David back." If only it were that easy!!

“Well, wake him the fuck up then," Mood

"Selena has power you cannot begin to comprehend. She was blessed by your precious angel.” that...is actually surprising and at the same time...it isnt??

I’ll tell Raziel you said hello,” I'm ✨confused✨

“Magnus!” Alec yelled. “Tessa!” Jem screamed.

Both warlocks collapsed to the floor. (we love protective husband!!! 💙)

"What did I miss?” YOU DONT KNOW HOW MANY CURSES IN HOW MANY LANGUAJES I JUST QUIETLY SCREMED CAUSE EVERYONE IS ASLEEP JDUSHKSNS

Love Lexi 💙💜

Tell them Max!!

“It’s Idris,” Omg what did they did to it??

Thank you for telling them Max!! Well...kinda

“He gave me the magic you took, for starters,” I cant say he is wrong tho...

“The secret is half a teaspoon of cinnamon sugar,” Max interrupted. “He told me to tell you that.” 🥺🥺🥺

I support Jace's plan!!!

“Are you shitting me?”  Yeah dudes!! One of the just died, the other solved half your shit, and the third one went to Edom and fucking played cards with Asmodeus!!

"You know how I feel about overrated tropes.” “Uh, you are literally fake dating someone right now.” Shes got a point...

Lexi just tell her!!!

The parabatai feels I get from them 💙💙

Olivia!!!

“Oh,” Lexi replied – because she was good at communication. (Relate to this. Put this in my grave.)

"He thought they were dating. That’s it." NO YOU IDIOT!!!

WTF WAS THAT??? NOO!!! MY HERONSTAIRS FEELS💔💔

“No,” the boy smiled. “I’m your good friend Raziel.” (... SHIT JUST GOT REAL....)

As always that is a lot in my mind. Its 2:40 a.m and this is all my mind can think of (worry not, tomorrow i'll wake as late as possible 😊)

Ελπίζω να έχεις μια υπέροχη μέρα! Είδατε κάτι αστείο; Απολαύστε το Σαββατοκύριακο 💙

HOLY SHIT. THE GREEK ALPHABET IS SO BEAUTIFUL? I AM STUNNED. (thanks for sharing this with me 💙)

As always I love your reactions so and I am so grateful that you share these with you - even in the middle of all the work. Thank you. So, so much.

Also Lexi, David and I are on our way to give your grandmother a good whack in the head. Sit tight x.

Also, do the tea bag thingy (put used tea bags in the fridge and then keep them on your eyes later on) it helps to cool down the eyes after you spent a lot of time in front of a screen :)

This is a funny thing I saw. It gives me Gigi vibes 😂😂

[capri-ramblings]

Yandere Malleus and Vil and Leona really wanting to start a family but there s/o isn't into the idea and just straight up refuses the idea Even quickly changing the subject saying she'd rather get a pet

I had my dad drive me around the neighborhood to have my braincells function for this and it still ended up bad (╥﹏╥) I'm sorry, I really tried but Vil and Malleus are so hard for me to write atm

Warning: Mention of toxic relationships

Vil Schoenheit

- Someone must've said something to him to make him actually want children.

- It's not that it never crossed his mind,it did, and he was planning to have a kid eventually,I mean, genes as beautiful as him should have an heir so this world would never run short of impeccable beauty,but you didn't expect it to be this soon.

- The question made your head reel and your stomach churned.

- "Daffodil,a young one running around would be a sight wouldn't it?" He had put it very subtly,but the thought still made you cringe. You were never really fond of kids.

- "I don't know,Vil...Why not get a cat or a pony or something?" When your words reached him, it had the male turning around with a slightly dark expression. The way the light seemed to scatter over his skin made him look almost ethereal.

- You bit your lower lip.

- "I saw your post about that new skincare earlier. I was thinking of trying it out tonight, your tips never fail to give results" You changed the topic fast, and Vil couldn't help but feel a swell of irritation build up in his chest.

- You were so easy to read. The least you could do was lie a little better.

- "I don't think you understand the situation here,mein lieb, I'm saying I want a family with you." He was smiling then but something in the way he looked at you gave away the fact he wasn't liking your attitude toward the whole idea

- "I mean,Vil...I wouldn't be such a good mom in the first place and ugh,don't kids just take up too much space? Why can't we just stay like this?"

- "Like what? Me always trying to see if you're still not trying to find a way to not be with me?"

- "Or are you talking about the fact that you'll never be as devoted to this relationship as I am?"

- The accusation rang clear in his voice and Vil didn't try to hide the anger in his gaze. You tried to find a way to calm him down, but your clear rejection really set him off bad.

- "I didn't mean it like that,Vil. It's just that —"

- "Stop talking, Daffodil. You're making my head ache."

- So you kept your mouth shut

- Vil sighed.

- "See? This is what I meant. You act like you care, but really when you're shoved into a corner you become this timid rat curling its tail around its body."

- "Vil.."

- "I said,don't speak." Vil tore down your defenses without hesitation, and you found yourself unable to withstand the glare daggering its way into your soul.

- "A child would mean the highest mark of love,and a child from my seed would mean the highest of blessings for you." Vil took your chin in his hand,gently tugging it towards him,as he brushed his lips against yours. "Why don't you embroider that understanding into your head, love?"

- Then,he let go and stood up. The fragrance of his perfume stilling your nerves. His eyes didn't meet yours again as he turned around to leave the room.

- "Because, the next time I ask, your answer should be a single word. Or I simply won't bother to make it a question."

Leona Kingscholar

- Cheka was playfully sitting on your lap when Leona asked you the question, and while the small little red haired beamed at the idea of having a baby cousin, your heart dreaded the notion.

- "A kid..?" You repeated the words almost fearfully, Cheka stirring in your lap. You tried your best not to let him slip off.

- Leona's green gaze met yours with a smugness you knew all too well.

- "Last time I checked,you weren't deaf,mousey",he said with a slight yawn.

- "And last time I checked, you didn't like kids" You shot back, earning a confused look on the small male currently in your grasp.

- "That's not true! Leona ojichan likes me!" Cheka whined then laughed when he did almost fall off and you managed to catch him, albeit hastily. Your grip tightened on him slightly as Cheka settled back in your lap.

- "Yeah, course I do, kiddo. You tell her,won't you?"

- "Kiddo!" Cheka grinned, easily falling for the display of affection from his uncle,but you knew better.

- The abyss of his eyes where he kept his darkest intent shone brightly amidst its emerald sheen. An uneasiness came over you then.

- "Why?" You asked before evaluating the question. It had Leona arching both his brows, expression unimpressed.

- He was being mildly aggressive today, and you were sure it was because of Cheka. If you didn't ask him about it now, there wouldn't be any other chances.

- "I need an heir too,isn't that just obvious?" The words were a drawl, lazy and casual, but they rang in your ears like a sore tune and you couldn't help but frown.

- "And you seem like you need something to take care of whenever I'm gone"

- "If that's the case, why not just get a horse? That takes just as much time to raise"

- Leona laughed, yet humour seemed so far away from his tone.

- "I don't know" He yawned,gaze shifting to Cheka. "What do you think,kiddo?"

- Cheka jumped up on your lap, his bright round eyes beaming when he looked at you. It's not that you hated kids, you thought they were cute, sure and obviously you adored the small bundle of joy whenever you and Leona came to visit, but the thought of having your own...It just stresses you out.

- It was one thing taking care of another person's kid, and a whole other topic to have your own. You just weren't up for it.

- "Cheka,why don't you go and see if Papa's done with his meeting,hm? He might need your help"

- "Papa needs my help? Aha! Yay!" He leaped down easily from your grasp,curls bouncing and eyes wide with enthusiasm. He was scurrying off well when he turned to you one last time.

- "Can I still come back and sit with you?"

- You smiled, even when he tired you out most of the time, Cheka was sweet and genuine, the complete opposite of Leona. Maybe that was why you tolerated him more than the said male himself.

- "Anytime"

- "Yay!"

- When he turned the corner and went completely out of your reach, your didn't hesitate to face Leona sitting right across you.

- "I don't want to have kids." You told him firmly, which he was expecting since he was well aware of how you felt about kids, but his smugness didn't fade.

- "Sure"

- "I'm serious,Leona. I don't want any,you know how I feel about it"

- He yawned, leaning against his chair as his emerald gaze fixated on you. There was something hidden in the smile he gave you then.

- "And what about how I feel,mousey? What if I want a kid?"

- You scoffed,maybe you didn't really mean it, but it came out and Leona growled.

- "Something amusing you?"

- The dark undertone of the words had you refraining your spite towards him, but the refusal remained unwavering.

- Leona applauded you for standing your ground,he wasn't going to lie, he enjoyed it when you fought or had the nerves to bite back. It felt more thrilling that way.

- When he laughed again,you really thought he was going to lose it right there and then, but as the familiar footsteps of Cheka and a second person, which you assumed was Farena, began approaching the two of you,Leona bared his fangs,a nerve trembling growl lacing his words possessively when they slipped pass his lips.

- "Let's see you try and stop me from seeding inside you,mousey"

Malleus Draconia

- If this man wanted a kid, the reason would be similar to all his others; Curiousity.

- Malleus adores you though, and when he came up with a plan that would make you his forever, he fell deeper into this abyss of infatuation. Perhaps made him a bit more extreme.

- He was always the inquisitive kind,this you knew was in his nature, and so when the question had came about, you simply thought shrugging it off would solve it

- It didn't of course. Nothing you said swayed his decision on wanting a child with you.

- This conversation turned bitter quick, and you remember just denying him the dream he'd been so thrilled to achieve, and how dark he seemed then.

- "Malleus,you know I care about you, but a child isn't something I want"

- "Care?" He repeated, and although the words left him blandly, there was a frothing rage in the depths of his tone, and somehow you knew you had already lost this argument.

- "Is that why you refuse? Because you care about me rather than loving me?"

- You looked at him almost exasperatedly. "Caring means I love you, Malleus"

- His dark brows arched, prominent and haughty, almost as if he was laughing at you despite the silence weighing down the room. His figure seemed to look over you, and the garden lost its floral hue.

- "Pray tell then,why don't you ever say it to me?" The words were a dark drawl, and they were meant to ensnare you; No answer was relevant now.

- You tittered on your toes,every inch of your nerves aching to retaliate,but Malleus held you in place, more with his demeanor rather than the hold he had on your hand.

- "I do love you, Malleus." You managed,eyes casted down before he lifted your chin up with one finger.

- "Then,prove it,my sweet. Give me a child."

Imsosorrythisisbad

[dreamii-yume]

YUME!!!!! Have you seen the groovy for ace birthday ssr???!! The black shirt with rolled sleeves + slice of cherry pie + tongue out + look in his eyes is absolutely dangerous!!!! Imagine being his pure darling happily taking care of him and not noticing the way he looks at her until she asks if theres anything else he wants for his birthday then he just says YOU!!!! /foams at mouth/

Yes! We have been blessed by another beautfiul birthday CG! (*≧∀≦*)

“Can I consider you as my gift then~?”

It was probably the most cheesiest reply that he could ever possibly think of. He’s embarrassed that he even had the nerve to say something like that. He wouldn’t normally say that, you know? It’s too uncool for someone like him and yet, he still did it anyway for some fucking reason.

Ace made it seem like a joke though, he probably really intended for it to be a joke but damn, just seeing your shocked face slowly turning red got him on edge. His heart beats against his ribcage in panic, although his face was doing a relatively good job at hiding his internal suffering. Ah, shit- did he fucked up? Did he made you too uncomfortable by saying something so unlike of him? Damn it, he shouldn’t said something like that after all! It was too obvious, idiot, that was too obvious!

His feelings for you are too obvious to hide, damn it!

But as his braincells fight for dominance inside his head, raging war against each other to see who can decide which actions he should take next, you slowly brought your hand to your mouth. You were trying to hide your red face and kept looking at the side, long eyelashes batting against each other repeatedly. A spark of youth radiated from you that Ace actually felt like a legit high school student for the first time, especially when you give him that slightly embarrassed smile.

“...If you don’t mind me then...” You muttered out, voice soft as you began to feel shy about saying something as cheesy as what he said. “I’ll gladly become your gift for today...Okay~?”

And at that moment, you were suddenly pulled into a bone-crushing hug. You blinked repeatedly and was very confused, tapping on Ace’s shoulder as his hold became tighter and tighter by the passing second. You tried calling out, concerned for what just happened and the fact that he was slowly knocking all air out of you.

Unfortunately, Ace couldn’t hear what you were saying, he can’t hear anything at all other than his own beating heart. His red ears are ringing from the amount of blood that went up his head in that single second too, he was literally becoming deaf with the silence! What’s with you suddenly becoming that cute, huh!? That’s unfair!

...Maybe he’ll really stay over at your dorm for tonight, he’ll sleep in your bed so you better not complain, alright!? It’s your own fault this happened anyway, dummy...

What better way to end Ace’s birthday crumbs with a dash of the good ‘ol fluff~! It’s been spicy and hornii that we truly forget how cuteness can literally kill us if done correctly! (΄◉◞౪◟◉｀)

Anyway, this is it for Ace’s Birthday Crumbs Event! There are still some asks I never got to answer but I’ll answer them in a different time instead! For now, thank you for sharing all your fluffy lewd thoughts, Darling~! ╰(*´︶`*)╯♡ Sweet Dreams~!

[partywithponies]

hi! i've only ever seen the bbc version of father brown and i've never read the books (i know, i'm so sorry), but i'm super curious about the different versions of father brown and you seem like an expert on each adaptation, so i was wondering if you'd be willing to give me a rundown of sorts on each version/series? i know it's a lot to ask and i may be opening the floodgates here, but there's not a ton of info online elsewhere and i'd love to learn more! thanks either way. ciao!

OH BOY YOU’VE COME TO THE RIGHT PLACE ANON

OKAY SO

As briefly as possible:

The books:

Proof people who complain about the BBC show being “too political” don’t actually know the books at all

Father Brown straight up calls capitalism “evil” and “heresy”

Chesterton says that millionaires dying isn’t a tragedy

Inspector Valentin betrayed us and broke my heart, ACAB I guess

Since every police officer he befriends lets him down in some way, Father Brown’s only real friend is Flambeau, who he goes absolutely everywhere with. They only go on holiday with each other. They’ve been all over the world with each other. I love they

Book Father Brown pretty much never does his goddamn job. We literally never in all the books see him giving mass or taking confession. The closest we get is when he gives an impromptu sermon after seemingly coming back from the dead, where he literally only says "You silly, silly people. God bless you all and give you more sense." then runs away to send a telegram. Useless priest. I love him. 

Book Flambeau is. Incredible. Amazing. Iconic. None of the adaptations have been able to fully capture book Flambeau’s true energy, for he is a walking contradiction who contains multitudes. If all the onscreen Flambeaus fused into one being, THEN you’d have something vaguely resembling book Flambeau.

Book Flambeau is MASSIVE. He’s at least 6′4, he’s broad shouldered, has huge hands, and his super buff. He can just. Pick people up and throw them. He can knock people unconscious with one punch. He fills doorways when he stands in them. He terrifies most people just by drawing himself up to his full height. He also has a very short temper and a very short patience. 

He’s very agile and athletic and can move silently, despite his size. He’s also a master of disguise, somehow. (Explain, Chesterton. Explain. Is everyone in this universe apart from Father Brown, Flambeau, and arguably Valentin massively stupid? Actually don’t answer that I’ve read these books)

Book Flambeau has a habit of flinging people full-bodily down flights of stairs when they anger him or threaten him or Father Brown. Book Flambeau also carries a walking cane with him literally everywhere that has a sword concealed in the handle, plus book Flambeau insists on taking pistols on holiday with him, even when he was just going for a peaceful fishing holiday in the Norfolk Broads. King. 

(Which all makes it so iconic that Father Brown, described as tiny and meek and sensitive, saw this man when he was still a hardened criminal on top of all this and said “THIS ONE I LIKE THIS ONE. I JUST THINK HE’S NEAT” and went off on a jolly through London with him.)

Flambeau’s past is extremely mysterious. We no nothing about his family or his childhood or where he’s from or why he turned to crime. We know he used to be a soldier, and a part of him misses it. We know he used to fight duels semi-regularly, and liked them to be fought the very next morning after they were organised. We know he always used to make sure to visit the dentist on time, even when he was a hardened criminal. (King of good teeth.)  We know he was in a gang at some point. We know he was a student at some point. We don’t know what he studied, but we know he knew Leonard Quinton in “wild student days in Paris”  ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°). This is literally all we know about his past before he met Father Brown. The man is a riddle wrapped in an enigma. (That’s why Flambeau is so big. He’s full of secrets)

(Fun fact: in the book universe Flambeau is famous and popular in America, so you could say that in universe Flambeau is America’s Favourite Fighting Frenchman.)

Flambeau also loves cats and children, believes in fairies, likes pointing out rocks that look like dragons, and likes giggling and mucking about on the beach with Father Brown.  A baby.

One time Father Brown called Flambeau “full of good and pure thoughts”, but I don’t think that’s quite true, Father. I think Father Brown just has endless faith in Flambeau.

Another thing I think is really neat is that it would’ve been so easy to have Father Brown be the genius and Flambeau his dumb muscle sidekick but that’s not the case at all! They’re both geniuses and they’re both each other’s sidekick, and in fact it’s Flambeau who’s the famous professional private detective, Father Brown is just an amateur. Father Brown is often defined by his connection to Flambeau rather than vice versa, both in the text (the text will frequently refer to them as something along the lines of “Flambeau and his friend the priest”, and on two separate occasions a long list of Flambeau’s possessions is ended with “and a priest”), and in universe (Father Brown himself is massively famous in America in universe largely because of “his long connection to Flambeau). I don’t know I just think it’s neat. 

One time a man threatened Father Brown with a gun and Flambeau just beat him unconscious and then Father Brown and Flambeau just drove away and left him unconscious on the path. It was awesome.

(I’m sorry I rambled about Flambeau for so many words I just. Really really like Flambeau you guys. Father Brown and Flambeau are like two separate crime drama character tropes, the hard boiled cynical P.I. and the cosy eccentric amateur detective, but together as a double act, and I just think that’s really cool.)

Father Brown himself is if anything even more mysterious. He’s just “Father J. Brown, formerly of Cobhole in Essex, currently London”, and he’s “Flambeau’s friend”, and that’s all. That’s all he needs to be.

I also really really love Father Brown himself. I love that he’s allowed to be cheerful and optimistic and childish without any of this making him less clever, and in fact he’s shown time and time again to be cleverer than grumpy cynics who are scornful of childish things. Like, the whole giggling childlike thing isn’t even some kind of act, he’s a genius who understands true human nature, and he also really really likes puppet shows and building sandcastles who telling fairy stories, he really does get a “childish pleasure” from seeing Flambeau swing his sword-stick, and he really does have “strong personal interest in tomfoolery”. I love him.

I must share my favourite book quote about Father Brown himself: “But neither of them is very like the real Father Brown, who is not broken at all; but goes stumping with his stout umbrella through life, liking most of the people in it; accepting the world as his companion, but never as his judge.” uwu uwu uwu I’m cry.

Chesterton just subverts all the expectations character wise, the cheerful bumbling priest is a genius, the violent criminal is a true hero, the noble police officer is a corrupt self-serving murderer. It’s great. We stan. 10000000/10

(I’m not very good at being brief, am I?)

Father Brown, Detective (1934):

The first movie! It’s completely ridiculous. I love it a lot.

It was released just at the start of Hays Code, which, among other things, stated that crime and immorality should not be glorified or glamourised, and all crime and immorality must be seen to be punished by the end of the film. In practice in the case of this film, this means two things:

Paul Lukas!Flambeau is the only Flambeau to actually go to prison (and stay there).

He’s by far the Flambeau who deserves it the least. Lukas!Flambeau never hurt a soul. He just wanted to be loved. #FreeMyBoyHercule

Okay but in all seriousness. There’s a reason I call Paul Lukas!Flambeau “Himbo Flambeau”. Where other Flambeaus are violent or dangerous or geniuses, Lukas!Flambeau is just a big dumb idiot who respects women and has a great sense of humour and writes all his letters in the third person like Elmo for some reason. I would die for him.

At one point Flambeau in disguise is talking to the police, and when the police criticise Flambeau, disguised Flambeau says “Oh but I assure! I have read many things about this Flambeau! He is a fearless, handsome fellow!” The absolute idiot. I adore him with my whole heart.

The film is set in London, like the books, but an idealised Hollywood version of London, i.e., almost entirely unlike London.

Walter Connolly!Father Brown is also entirely lacking in braincells. Look at these two idiot men:

I love them.

Oh oh! And the most important thing, the thing that carries over into most other adaptations? NEW ORIGINAL CHARACTERS!!

This movie invents a few characters that weren’t in the books, but the most important ones are Mrs Boggs:

She doesn’t really add much to the plot but she’s funny and I love her so I’ll forgive it. 

She’s Father Brown’s housekeeper, she’s basically just the fussing maternal female character archetype who fusses around in the background, but she does it well and plays it with charm so I’ll allow it.

(Honestly this whole film is just. Not *technically* good or original, but just so charming and with so much heart that I unironically adore it.)

She tries to make Father Brown drink his milk because it’s good for him even though he doesn’t like it, and keeps checking back in on him to make sure he’s drunk it, it’s literally like a mother and her small child.

She objects to policemen in the presbytery because of their “big muddy boots on the carpet” but is fine with just letting Flambeau in whenever despite the prevailing rumour in London being that Flambeau killed a man. We stan a queen of having priorities. 

When Inspector Valentine summons Father Brown to the station, Mrs Boggs pops up in the background, assumes Father Brown’s being arrested, and says “Oh dear, I knew it!” and it makes me giggle like an idiot every time.

The other, more important original character invented for this movie is my girl Evelyn Fischer:

I love her, I would die for her, she’s flawless.

She’s basically your typical bored and rebellious young aristocrat, but she has a chaotic streak that I adore.

She sneaks out of her family’s mansion to go to a seedy underground club/illegal gambling ring in Soho (I mean I assume it’s Soho, a seedy part of London in that general vicinity, at least. I’m not about to get bogged down trying to understand the geography of London according to Hollywood), flirts with a bunch of strangers for fun, then when the police raid the place and everyone else is panicking she stands stock still, cheerfully says “Oh goody, I shall probably get my name in the papers!” and has to be physically dragged out of the building by Flambeau.

Later on Flambeau breaks into her bedroom in the middle of the night and she’s just very calmly like “What are you doing?”, and even when she finds out it’s Flambeau, a man widely believed to be dangerous and violent, instead of being scared, she calls him an idiot right to his face.

She forms the third part of the main trio of the movie with Father Brown and Flambeau (RIP to Valentine, demoted to tertiary character in a loose adaptation of the one (1) story where he was the main character lol) and together the three of them share a single braincell and have to take turns with it, while Mrs Boggs fusses in the background at the trio’s increasingly bonkers decisions. 

The movie ends with Father Brown and Evelyn sharing an emotional farewell with Flambeau through the window of a police car and promising to look after each other until Flambeau’s released, wow poly rights.

The Adventures of Father Brown (1945):

The adaptation there’s the least amount of information about, but I’ve done my best to find everything I can find on it.

An American radio show made towards the end of wartime, it’s a bit of an odd one, and believe me Father Brown adaptations have gone some odd places.

Only two episodes survive, or at least if more do survive then whoever has them is being very selfish and hoarding them to themselves because only two episodes are publicly available anywhere, and the audio quality of those is a bit dodge. (Though that is to be expected, they do appear to be home recordings, from 1945. Honestly we should be grateful to even have two full episodes.)

If the actors I’ve found are the right people, this show featured by far the youngest Father Brown and Flambeau, at the start of the show the actor playing Father Brown was only 36 and the actor playing Flambeau was only 27. They’re BABIES. (Honestly I’d like to see more age variation in Father Brown adaptations, as I have extensively rambled about before, the characters have literally no canon ages in the books, I think people ought to be a little more imaginative instead of always building on the adaptations that came before, even if it is really cool to see traces of all the previous adaptations in each new one that comes along. It’s something I haven’t noticed as much in adaptations of other golden age detective novels, but the Father Brown adaptations do seem to be stuck in some kind of game of “yes, AND” with each other. I would REALLY like to see an adaptation where Flambeau is older than Father Brown though, it's just something we've never had before despite there being literally nothing in the books to suggest this can't be the case, and I just think it'd be neat.)

This show is really really painfully American, in a real old fashioned "golly gee whizz mister" kind of way, to the point it almost feels like a parody, and I honestly find it kind of endearing.

Even Flambeau frequently slips into a very American accent to the point that my affectionate nickname for him is "The All-American Flambeau", and it's great. He's great.

Honestly I could accept the accents and the slang, for some reason the only thing that really threw me was Father Brown referring to money in cents and nickels.

Needless to say, this adaptation is not set in London. It is instead set in Generic Unspecified Smalltown USA. It's fine. This is fine. I already have so many films and shows set in London, I can swallow my London pride and let America have this.

It's hard to get a real grasp on characters from just two episodes, but I like this Father Brown and Flambeau, even if they are a little overly serious, and even if Flambeau doesn't really do much. He may be a bit serious and a bit useless but All-American Flambeau stays up late anxiously waiting for Father Brown to get home safely and it's very sweet. What a good boy.

All-American Flambeau also carries handcuffs around with him for some reason? But no weapons? Why is All-American Flambeau one of the few Flambeaus not to have a gun? Oh well, he's still sweet.

The 1945 radio show also gives us some original characters, but they're very much side characters and not part of the main plot and it's very hard to get a good grasp on a character from just a few minutes of audio from just two episodes but here's what I could gather:

Nora is another fussing housekeeper! She seems younger and less maternal than Mrs Boggs, but I don't know if that's just because the whole cast was on the younger side. (Could the radio station not find anyone over the age of 40? Were they in short supply in 1945 or something? Ah well.) She seems dedicated to helping Father Brown get some peace and quiet that he never goddamn gets because someone always goes and gets themselves murdered. In both surviving episodes a knock at the door disturbs Father Brown’s rest, Nora opens it professionally, sees it's Flambeau, and immediately drops the professionalism and is immediately like "oh it's only you", so I can only assume every episode started this way. I do hope so.

Father Peter is a junior priest who answers to Father Brown and takes over his duties on his days off. He's implied by the dialogue to be considerably younger than Father Brown, Nora, and Flambeau, but if their actors are anything to go by then they're not that old themselves, and though Father Brown seems to talk to Father Peter like he's a literal child, he is still a priest so I very much doubt that's the case. He seems sweet and harmless, but he's only in one of the surviving episodes and only in that towards the end and mentioned briefly at the start, so it's hard to judge completely. It's highly unlikely that the reason he's not even mentioned in the later surviving episode is because he turned out to secretly be an evil murderer, but, this being a Father Brown adaptation, not entirely unfounded. (But no, he's probably just a sweet boy who exists to have exposition delivered to him.)

Father Brown/The Detective (1954):

The Alec Guinness movie! The one haters of any of the other adaptations complain that adaptation isn't more like, but in my humble opinion, actually the worst adaptation.

Like, I don't hate it! The cast is mostly stellar actors and if I just saw it as a movie on its own, it'd probably be fine. But as a Father Brown adaptation watched in context of the books and the other adaptations, it has a few issues imo.

Most glaringly it has Tone Issues. This film cannot decide if it's a comedy or not. The original posters certainly marketed it as one (see above) and half the cast are noted comic actors who were famous at the time for comedy, goddamn SID JAMES is in it, but the entire third act is played painfully straight, half the cast is mugging for the camera and trying way too hard to be funny while the other cast is giving extremely serious and subtle performances, like. I have no problem with a Father Brown adaptation being played for laughs, and I have no problem with a Father Brown adaptation being played for drama, both can work beautifully, but just PICK ONE, PLEASE

All of my other gripes with the film are very petty and nitpicky, this film calls Father Brown and Flambeau "Ignatius Brown" and "Gustav Flambeau" even though Father Brown has the canon first initial "J" and Flambeau has the canon first name "Hercule", and I hate it a lot. "Ignatius and Gustav" is the second worst thing any Father Brown adaptation has ever done to me.

My other petty nitpick with the movie is that it makes Flambeau literal nobility. The man is a duke. In my opinion Flambeau should always either have a completely mysterious past or be a nobody who came from nothing, someone who grew up with land and title and many servants and a family coat of arms, living in a whole entire castle with his family name and coat of arms engraved into the side of it, growing up and stealing from people, is a whole lot less sympathetic in my opinion. Like to be fair his parents are dead which is sad I guess and his castle has seen better days, but dude. You still own a castle. People who live in castles do not get to lecture other people about materialism.

THAT SAID, Peter Finch is still the best thing about the movie. I love all Flambeaus dearly, even the ones that are little bitches. He’s a bit of an emo “oh woe is me” sadboy, but he’s very charming, and actually good at disguises and being undercover, get dunked on Lukas!Flambeau.

Guinness!Brown likes to feed ducks and Flambeau calls him “the angel with the flaming umbrella”, which makes my inner Good Omens fan who loves finding parallels between Aziraphale & Crowley and Father Brown & Flambeau go 👀

There is one really good scene, in the Paris Catacombs. And by “good” I mean “really really bafflingly gay”:

I truly, truly do not understand how this scene was written, directed, acted, filmed, and edited without ANYONE saying “hey lads does this seem a bit gay to you?”

Father Brown, literally lying on top of Flambeau and pinning him to the ground, whispering: “I would like to set you free.” Flambeau, softly, gently smiling while his face is literal inches away from Father Brown, who is still pinning him to the ground: “Ah, now I begin to understand what you are.”

What the fuck, you guys. What the entire fuck. This scene keeps me up at night.

ANYWAY

This film is also not set in London. It is instead mostly set in a rural English village, and partially in Paris and partially in rural France. Paris is fun but I miss London.

This film also has some original characters. I should probably talk about them. 

This is Lady Warren:

She’s Father Brown’s friend, and she’s a Lady, and that’s all I can really tell you.

She’s very well-mannered and dignified and sophisticated.

She gives me the vibe that she exists solely because the writers decided they needed a female character but then remembered at the last minute they had no idea how to write women, so as a result she is almost entirely irrelevant to the plot. I don’t want to say I don’t like her, because she’s done nothing wrong and it’s not her fault, but like. Why is she here? Poor thing, she deserved to be plot-relevant, really.

She lives in a big mansion and owns some very nice things, and she gets annoyed when she invites Father Brown to lunch but he just stares blankly into space thinking about Flambeau the whole time. (Mood honestly FB. Me too.) 

She flirts a bit with Flambeau in one very pointless scene that came the hell out of nowhere, went nowhere, and was never mentioned again. It was like the writers realised how gay the previous Flambeau scene was and suddenly tried to convince me this man is a hetero. Nice try, writers. You can’t fool me that easily.

The other main original character is Bert:

Alright, own up, whose bright idea was it to put Sid James in a Father Brown movie?

Bert is a smalltime criminal who’s a friend of Father Brown, who Father Brown protects from the police, but tries to convince to get on the straight and narrow by getting him as a job as Lady Warren’s chauffer. 

This is would be fine, were it not for the fact he’s played by Sid James, who only knows how to play Sid James, and is just Sid Jamesing it up in every scene. I don’t have anything against Sid James. I like my fair share of Carry On films. But Sid James does not belong in Father Brown and I want to fight whoever decided he did.

Father Brown (1974):

LADS LADS LADS! It’s time for the first TV show, and it’s time for my favourite boys:

Oh! OH! How I love Kenneth More!Brown and Dennis Burgess!Flambeau. They’re just. So cute. My two special boys.

Not only that, but LADS! We’re finally back in London!

A gritty, dirty, London in the 1930s no less, with cool London buses and political unrest and grimy pubs and the constant threat of world war. Alexa this is so cool play London Calling.

In one episode Flambeau gets verbally abused by an anti-immigration right-wing zealot. :( My poor boy. :( 

(But it’s okay, shortly after Father Brown witnesses this, the racist shows up dead in exactly the place Father Brown earlier said would be a good place to commit a murder. Now I’m not accusing Father Brown of murder, BUT)

This show made the bold but valid decision to skip Flambeau’s redemption arc and start the show when Flambeau is already a seasoned and respected private detective who’s lived in London and been Father Brown’s closest friend for many years. As a result this Father Brown and Flambeau are ridiculously domestic with each other. Look at this peak Old Married Couple energy:

Oh! I just love them.

I would love to know how Burgess!Flambeau’s redemption went down though, because Burgess!Flambeau is BY FAR the least repentant of all the reformed Flambeaus. He proudly boasts about his crimes, he still believes he “deserved to succeed”, he still proudly talks about how “daring and outrageous” he was, which begs the question of why did he stop at all? Literally the only explanation I can think of is that he’s literally only doing this for Father Brown’s sake, which. uwu

Oh GOD I love Burgess!Flambeau. Obviously I love all Flambeaus a lot, and choosing a favourite feels like choosing a favourite child, but let’s just say: if the Flambeaus WERE my children, Burgess!Flambeau would be quite spoilt. My ~ Daring And Outrageous ~ boy.

More!Brown and Burgess!Flambeau are both really really socially awkward, uncomfortable in crowds, and nervously say “oh dear” a lot. They really are ridiculously cute.

They also only giggle and joke and act silly when they’re together, when they’re apart they’re both sort of sad and quiet and withdrawn. (This makes episodes Flambeau isn’t in a bit harder to watch because Father Brown is just kind of lost and lonely without his emotional support Frenchman, with three notable exceptions: that time Father Brown infodumped about the mating habits of whales at the Father Superior for a solid minute, that time Father Brown met a dog and reacted with unrestrained delight, and that time someone mentioned former criminals in passing and Father Brown’s whole face lit up and he started gushing about how Flambeau was living in London now and doing very well as a private detective, completely unprompted.)

This show also brought back book!Brown and Flambeau’s habit of always going on holiday together! Wonderful! We love to see it!

This show is also the first time in the entire Father Brown franchise where gay people are overtly acknowledged to exist! And Father Brown is non-judgemental! A roman catholic priest written in the 1970s and living in the 1930s who canonically isn’t homophobic! I have no choice but to stan forever!

You remember what I said about liking to point out Good Omens parallels? WELL

Kenneth More!Father Brown and Dennis Burgess!Flambeau both live in London

Burgess!Flambeau lives in a brightly lit, pale walled, airy and spacious, modern (for the time) London apartment, while More!Brown prefers gothic architecture and lives in an old, grey, cramped, stone building absolutely full floor to ceiling with books

They go out for intimate candlelit dinners for two at very fancy London restaurants 

Desperate people come to Flambeau because he “knows the game on both sides of the fence”

Father Brown responds with a quiet and miserable “oh dear” when asked to actually do his job instead of just watching plays and drinking wine

Father Brown calls Flambeau “my dear” at times and it personally kills me

I mean. I’m just saying.  👀

Now, isn’t there a third important character in the books? 

Oh yes of course:

HIM! THE BASTARD MAN! INSPECTOR VALENTIN HIMSELF!

(Nobody understands him! IT’S NOT! EVIL!)

This show is the literally only adaptation to include the Valentin betrayal and I’m not gonna lie. It’s a very difficult episode to sit through, it’s far darker and grimmer and more depressing than you would ever expect from Father Brown, but my god it’s done so well. Especially considering the teeny tiny budget they clearly had, only four sets are used the entire episode and the whole thing takes place inside Valentin’s house, but even that adds a certain claustrophobic atmosphere and just. It’s done so well.

I think the entire budget went on gore effects because the decapitated heads in this episode are disturbingly realistic for the time the show was made and genuinely grim to look at. Not to mention the intense downer ending.  Not to mention this was THE FINAL EPISODE OF THE SHOW

THE INTENSE DOWNER ENDING OF THIS EPISODE IS HOW THE WHOLE SHOW ENDED

God it hurts so much but I lowkey love it. 

Father Brown Stories (1984):

The second radio series, and the first BBC adaptation! 

Thrilling times for fans of actors being the right nationality for their characters, because after previously being played by a Hungarian, an American, an Englishman, and a Welshman, Flambeau is finally being played by a Frenchman, Olivier Pierre!

Father Brown himself is played by Andrew Sachs, Manuel himself. 

Not gonna lie. It’s kind of hard to figure out how to explain the radio show.

We’re? Maybe back in London? Honestly it’s really unclear.

Pierre!Flambeau is kind of adorable. He’s described as looking like book!Flambeau physically, huge and buff and terrifying, but he has literally none of the temper or predisposition to violence. 

Pierre!Flambeau doesn’t speak very good English at all, and oftentimes will react with “...What?” when he hears a strange English idiom or turn of phrase.

One time he says “Perhaps we should.. push on? SEE HOW I AM MASTERING YOUR ENGLISH IDIOMS” and it’s the cutest thing that’s ever happened.

To try and get better at understanding both the English language and the English people, Flambeau starts obsessively reading Alice in Wonderland and Through The Looking Glass, massive giant adorable boy.

One time Father Brown gets complimented of being academically minded and well read, and then asked if Flambeau is also a keen reader, and when Flambeau tries to say no, Father Brown interrupts and proudly and earnestly says “Oh yes! Monsieur Flambeau is one of our top Lewis Carroll scholars!”, it’s honestly adorable.

This adaptation finally uses “John” as Father Brown’s first name, as it should always have been! I love it!

This series said FUCK Father Brown having a mysterious past and no former friends or relatives! Now he has siblings, and friends who knew him before he was a priest who still call him “John”!

Father Brown himself speaks in a very sweet and soft and wavering way that makes my heart melt.

Sadly and unfortunately, I have to acknowledge the final episode of the show, which is the top worst thing any Father Brown adaptation has ever done to me.

It’s. It’s a crossover. With Sherlock Holmes. Actual goddamn Sherlock Holmes is in it. I hate it. I hate it so much. “Elementary, my dear Flambeau” shut the hell up, if this Flambeau won’t fling you down a flight of stairs then I will.

I deliberately avoided all Holmes-related media for THREE YEARS only for the awful man to spring up on me in Father Brown?? How could you do this to me???

I’m going to yeet myself into the sun, bye everyone.

(On the plus side, the Sherlock Holmes episode does have one of Father Brown’s parishioners recognise Flambeau as “a close friend of Father Brown and a frequent visitor to his room”  ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°), so that’s nice I suppose. I’ll still never forgive the writers of this show for putting me through this.)

Father Brown (2013):

YOU ARE HERE.

I kind of see the current TV series as a culmination of all the adaptations that’ve come before? I can definitely see echoes of all of them in it.

And it’s great! I really really love it. I love it a lot. 

I think about it daily.

My one and only complaint I would have is that Flambeau isn’t in it enough. Not just because he’s my favourite, though I’d obviously not be fooling anyone who’s read all this if I said he isn’t.

And it’s not that I don’t love the show as it is, and find the one Flambeau episode a series always something really special, so I don’t know what I’d have the writers do, exactly. 

But it’s just. In literally every other version of Father Brown, Flambeau is the second most important character and the second main protagonist, and to have him in this show so little that some fans or reviewers call him a “minor character” and others call him a “recurring villain”, though I myself don’t see him either of those ways of course because he’s still Flambeau, it’s just kinda sad and painful, y’know?

I don’t know. Maybe I’m just being silly.

Hopefully he’s a regular in at least the final season of the show. If I don’t get my favourite partners in crime solving I’m rioting. 

Anyway that’s my “””brief””” rundown on all the main versions of Father Brown!! I hope you liked it!!

[yandere-romanticaa]

ᴛʜᴇ ᴛᴇʟʟᴛᴀʟᴇ ᴛᴀʟᴇꜱ ᴏꜰ ᴛʜᴇ ᴍʏꜱᴛᴇʀɪᴏᴜꜱ ᴀɴᴅʀᴇᴡ ᴊᴇᴋʏʟʟ ᴀɴᴅ ᴛʜᴇ ꜱᴜᴀᴠᴇ ᴇᴅᴡᴀʀᴅ ʜʏᴅᴇ.

♥♥♥

A well beloved doctor living in London, Andrew has made quite a name for himself! All of his patients are very happy with his work as he is able to always diagnose them properly and give them the correct medicine - truly a divine blessing in this day and age. He's a cheerful gentleman in his mid to early thirties who always has a gentle smile on his face. He is very fond of children and he does not mind babysitting them whenever someone asks him to do so, making him popular with parents and single mothers especially. During the day time he is filled to the brim with work but he always makes time to have afternoon tea, chat with his servants, or just try to enjoy like in general. A truly kind man in the eyes of many!

Alas though, when darkness overcomes his manor a new side of the good doctor surfaces, a side that no one knows about.

And Andrew plans to keep it that way.

There are many, many things that the doctor desires, craves, needs. But he is stuck in the same place day by day as he is forced to play his role of the savior. Even the good doctor Andrew likes to indulge himself from time to time... But that indulgence has gotten out of hand. By sheer accident Andrew was able to create a special elixir which is able to shift him in to a completely different person. His body is different, his hair is different, everything is different. His psyche however, remains the same.

And Andrew uses this newfound knowlege to his advantage.

Dubbing his new alter ego "Edward Hyde", Andrew is pleased to do what he wants once the sun sets. He messes with the townfolk, he shamelessly flirts and seduces any woman he sees, he picks on the young and the poor, nothing is off the table. This becomes a habbit very quickly as Edward is soon well known among the city. Some flee and flinch at the mere mention of him while others scoff and prepare their fists for a fight. Things continue like this for a while until Andrew notices that whenever he changes in to Edward, his mind is no longer fully his. Even throught the day as he sits in his office he can hear a gruff voice at the back of his mind, telling him to just finish the damn paperwork already. He starts hearing this voice everywhere and he starts to think that he is going mad. The voice taunts him day after day until he finally turns in to Hyde. Only then is he able to feel some inner peace. Andrew soon starts to lose control over himself as the voice grows louder and louder, yelling at him and commanding him to do its bidding. Every day now turns in to a battle as Andrew struggles to get out of bed and face himself in the mirror... But that's the catch. On one fateful morning the reflection he sees is not his own.

It's Hyde's.

The glowing green eyes of Edward Hyde stare back at him as Jekyll does his best to hold his breath in. This can't be real, this can't be happening! By now Andrew is pretty much at war with this new persona he had made and he does not know how to stop this coflict. Both do as they please which contradicts their previous actions, making both Edward and Andrew more then a little suspicious to the public eye. By this point Andrew regrets having ever created Edward but it's too late now. Edward Hyde was a part of him now, a dark part of him which could not be released. The only thing Andrew could do was to keep him at bay even if he was bearly able to do so. This constant pushing and pulling was exhausting to both of them and both were more then ready for a release.

And their release indeed came, but not in the way they thought it would.

It came in the form of love. Love for a sweet darling, a twisted obsession and want over this special little lamb who stumbled in to their lives by sheer accident, at the wrong place at the wrong time.

Andrew and Edward remain greatful still.

The pushing and pulling dies down whenever (y/n) is in the room and their attitudes are completely different from each other. Oh, if only (y/n) knew just what sort of danger awaits...

Andrew Jekyll.

Ever the gentleman, Andrew always places his darlings needs before his own. He worries for his sweetheart constantly as he dotes on them, making sure that they are safe and happy. Did his darling eat today? Did his darling sleep well? He won't ever stop asking these questions whenever he sees them, he just can't help himself! He never shuts up and he always seems to forget what he is trying to say but that's okay, his darling doesn't seem to mind.

Andrew stays gentle like that for a while as he treats his darling like divine royalty which does not go unnoticed by the people around him. He hears his servants whisper many things once he turns his back but he can't help but to blush a little - he may act a little awkward but in reality he really doesn't mind.

Andrew is also willing to bend over backwards and break his spine to get his darling whatever their little heart desires. He has more then enough money then he knows what to do with anyway! He wants jis darling to depend on him, he wants to be darlings only one true protector. He wants to provide for his darling like a good husband would.

Andrew often loses himself in these little fantasies that he gets distracted from his work, cahsing him to mess something up or to accidentaly spill or destroy amything around him. It's a vicious cycle of endless pinning as Andrew just doesn't have the guts to express his feelings, much to Hyde's annoyance and amusement. Cracks will start to form deep within him as Andrew tries to restrain himself more and more whenever he is around his darling. His smiles are not entierly his anymore as he stares his darling down like a piece of meat. Andrew hungers for darlings love and approval which in a way, does make his darling a piece of meat to him.

No matter what he just can never get enough of his darling, ever. The cheerful smiles thrown his way are not enough, and good grief just the mere brush of darlings fingers against his own is enough to send Jekyll in to a panicked frenzy. He loses his composure right there and then as he is forced to look his darling in the eye and do... nothing. He can't do anything he desires, he can't grab his darling by the back of their neck and press those pretty little lips against his own...

He can't caress the love of his life freely in public.

Hell, he can't even touch them without someone making a fuss.

Everything, everyone, is slowly driving him mad.

His love is driving him mad.

Andrew's affection starts to turn conditional, he can only ever shower his darling with gifts if they behave how he wants them to, if they pay enough attention to him, which is of course never quite enough.

His sanity fades as lovesickness kicks in.

His patience is wearing thin. What's taking his darling to love him back already? Hasn't he done everything any ideal lover would do? He has done literally everything, it must be his darling! It can't be his fault! His soft spoken words soon turn sharper then any knife as he imagines that very same weapon in his hands, pressed against darlings pretty little neck. Bruised, bloody and broken, that's how Jekyll wants his darling to be now.

He wants to crush them in his love.

And chances are, he will give in to his temptations.

Edward Hyde.

Tsk, tsk, this man is quite the charmer. A real smooth talker blessed with a deeper voice then his more seemingly more gentle counterpart, Hyde is no stranger to suggestive comments and rough touches. His feelings ignite like flames, quickly and suddenly. They take over his heart and soul, burning him and leaving endless ache and want in its path.

It's a strange feeling. He doesn't know how to feel about it...

When he meets his darling he treats her just how he treats other women. He craves nothing more then darlings body but when darling turns him down Hyde feels intrigued. Playing hard to get, eh?

He is always up for a good challenge.

Hyde stops paying attention to other women and his darling soon becomes his prime time target - Edward cannot move on unless he has his darling. He provokes, taunts and teases, just itching to see darlings reactions to his schemes. Cuss at him, slap him, do anything you want! Just as long as your focus is on him that wolf like grin will never leave his face. He just loves it when his darling turns red, it's so cute he could kiss her. His provoking continues like this for a while until Hyde begins to realize just how some couples act around each other. His softer side starts to show itself and it's something to marvel at really.

Unlike Jekyll, who is soft at the beginning and turns cruel at the end, Hyde is the opposite of that. He doesn't want to just mess with his darling anymore, he wants to actually love and care for her, to actually be in a commited relationship.

His protective side is on full display and anyone with at least a single braincell should be able to get the message.

Hyde often wonders when the Hell did he become so soft all of a sudden. He wants this pain in his chest to stop but the only way it can is if his darling is with him. He doesn't need anyone else... He doesn't want anyone else.

Let's hope Hyde's darling has a strong stomach because he doesn't give a damn who he has to hurt. He and Jekyll are nearly nothing alike but if they share on thing in common, it would be determination.

Edward Hyde has found his prey and he isn't going anywhere without it.

Tags: @3rdgymbros, @eclipsezero, @ghostiebabey, @yandere-of-your-dreams, @howl-of-the-hunting-lambs, @yandere-wishes, @severnrsstuff, @twstdreams, @twst-soul, @hattress-of-spades

I did my best guys, I hope this was okay! First time making a OC, sorry if it's too similar to the original characters. As I write more stories for them I'll try to build them up more! And feel free to ask any questions if you have them!

[yetremains]

♡ + Yang and Ryou, both canon and MK verses :^)

SEND ME ♡ + A SHIP AND I’LL TELL YOU…

ANOTHER LONG ONE Oh boy this will be interesting *Entirely on the maybes of when they stop being dummy himbos* I tried

CANON

Who is the most affectionate? At first they would probably be very slow and gentle with the affection, considering there are already plenty of soft moments between them. Ryou is naturally affectionate towards his friends and loved ones, while Yang enjoys letting those she cares for know she does. But once the option is here, they would probably be very touch starved indulgence. Lots of tight holds, leaning into each other, soft whispers late into the night. Calling each other by their real names when alone.

Who initiates the handholding? Given the chance, Yang would absolutely go for hand holding first, as a grounding reminder. That it's real, Ryou is real, this is still reality. However I can see it being him that would in the quiet moments reach out to thread their fingers together, take solace in the warmth and grip.

Who worries more for the other? Ryou, without a doubt. While she worries over him and always has over the time they have known each other, Yang is the more feral. 'She protecc, she attacc, but also YANG YOU HAVE TO HOLD BACK'. After all these years, there has been the constant that Yang will willingly enter a fight if there is no other option. A combination of being a product of the world she's lived in, and the traumatic fear of loss.

Who is more likely to ask for help? Neither of them want to burden the other, or anyone really, with any of their troubles or endanger them, stubborn idiots. However they are extremely close, and if there was a deep need for help with something, or presence, and ear, then Ryou and Yang truly can depend on each other in times of need. And after a bit, probably more than willing to reach out. Breaking old habits is hard and never done in one night.

Who is the one always losing the keys? I feel like not one or the other would loose their keys all that often. Having been around in this world a god damn long time, they have learned to keep important objects close and on hand. But in Jack's case, maybe forgetting anything higher tech related would be more common.

Who leaves little love notes for the other? Being so tied with music, Yang would probably be leaving poems or small lyrics for Ryou now and then, while he'd leave behind heart felt notes of few lines.

Who can’t sleep unless the other is there? Sleep? These two? Less likely than you think! A combination of stubborn, trauma, PTSD, and the refusal to fall prey too the internal minds. But all the same, Yang wants to help him sleep more. But I feel that knowing they both have someone dependable there, they can't sleep well at all without each other.

Who is more likely to propose to the other? Two dummy thicc stubborn idiots managing this far? Your guess is as good as mine! This is much like a wild card, and it depends entirely on the thought processes. But if a lot of time goes by, it would be Yang, with a simple gold ring with writing around the inside of it. If she doesn't internalize it and let the thoughts spiral forever. Otherwise Ryou just might get the chance first.

Who introduced the other to their family first? Jack/Ryou, since he has adopted Ashi as a dottir. Yang doesn't really have any family left, considering her age and the wars of the past. And Scottsman is absolutely the wild uncle.

Who is more likely to play with the other’s hair? I've said this before, but Yang does love playing with her partners hair, and Jack is going to be spoiled like this. Running her fingers through his long hair, enjoying how soft it is. And amazed he can tie all of it up so easily and quick. Talent.

Who makes sure the other has meals/stays hydrated? It would possibly switch depending on the day and the others moods, the highs and lows. Yang will absolutely spoil him with salmon items, green teas, and peach anything, especially peach mochi.

Who is more likely to stand up to anyone for the other? A long time ago it would have absolutely been Yang immediately ready to throw down. But now, they are far more on par, and Ryou would absolutely be protective if he knows something would be too much or too dangerous for Yang to handle. He's the holder of most braincells and also arguably the more dangerous out of the two of them.

Who is the most likely to prepare a surprise for the other? Yang loves spoiling and surprising those she cares about. Be it small hand made items, food, silly gifts, it's just nice. So most often she might surprise him with something. But Jack is also the type to take great consideration and time to return such acts of affection.

Who makes the other pinky promise not to do certain things? Jack/Ryou. While the two of them no longer age, he is well aware Yang is much older and has crossed a lot of lines in the past. Long ago when he was more bright eyed, it was him that had Yang not be so merciless in a fight with someone, more willing to give second chances in a world that was so twisted already. He would most likely make her promise not to take unneeded risks. But on the flip side of that coin, Yang would make Ryou pinky swear to not let himself spiral so far down in himself and his thoughts.

Who puts a blanket over the other when they fall asleep on the couch? Sleeping on the couch? It's a miracle! In all seriousness though, the most likely scenario would be Ryou coming across Yang slumped on the couch at some point and putting a blanket on her. Since she will go quite a long time without sleep naturally, but further than should be done. But this doesn't mean that Yang wouldn't find him once in a rare blue moon instead, and put her vest over him with a blanket. Potentially going to slip closer to let his head lay in her lap.

-

-

MK VERSES

Who is the most affectionate? It would take a while for them to get here, but as close and trusting as the two are, if one wants affection then it will be given. Touch starved old souls want their cuddles, and they want them now. In this particular case I feel it might be Ryou sunshine boy that is just a little more. Yang will eventually melt into it, if she's not being the big spoon, or letting him lay on her chest to hear the heartbeat.

Who initiates the handholding? Depending on the where and when, it could be one or the other. But feel Yang might be the one to reach out and hold, but Ryou's grip might be just a little tighter when the thread their fingers together.

Who worries more for the other? When is there not worry for the other? Both of them are dangerous warriors in their own right and have been through hell and high water, improved their fighting skills and talents over the years, thus seen each other messed up in more ways than one. It's natural. But does not mean the fear or worry goes away. But I feel like in certain scenarios, it might be Yang that worries more about him, and gets herself ready for the worst- which in turn makes him worry harder. It's an infinity loop!

Who is more likely to ask for help? For something smaller, it's left unsure. Potentially willing to bring one or another in for help. It's not often that the need for it might arise if it's something more difficult, but if it does, it might just be Yang to ask first. Stubbornly.

Who is the one always losing the keys? Potentially these two, who carefully keep track of such things, would rarely loose anything. For ease of sue as well, Yang might just label what keys of hers go where for Ryou, because Yang does travel.

Who leaves little love notes for the other? I can see Ryou leaving more simple notes, but Yang will leave origami folded flowers for him in return, to unfold and read himself. They may even use different languages to convey things better, seeing as some are lacking in words.

Who can’t sleep unless the other is there? Both of them no doubt, considering they've been through way too much. But having a warm body there to hold can help. However... The meaning of proper sleep is lost on Yang, as her schedule is often stay up 48 hours, sleep for 9 or so after, rinse and repeat. It means more likely to watch over and protect. Waking from nightmares and memories is a common event. But with Ryou there she can manage to sleep more regularly and not be so tense. The nightmares don't stop of course, but it does help.

Who is more likely to propose to the other? Oddly enough, while Yang had been the one who proposed too her old fiance many years ago, in this particular instance she might not. Would just be content and happy with what they have here, not daring push it. So it probably in the end would be the half edenian if it went that far. Unless Yang uses music to do so.

Who introduced the other to their family first? If very close friends and ally's count as family, or adopted ones, then I feel like it doesn't matter who does it first. This would just come into happening with lost of smiles and gleeful joy. Have you seen the adopted kids? Here they are on both sides, aren't they fantastic!

Who is more likely to play with the other’s hair? Yang would adore playing with Ryou's hair, brushing it and braiding or such things, massaging his scalp. Her hands are surprisingly soft, thanks to wearing gloves all the time. But if he were to do the same for her, she would be weak for it.

Who makes sure the other has meals/stays hydrated? Eating hearty and staying hydrated is something Yang always needs to do, and knows how horrible it is to not do so. So while she may sometimes neglect herself, this woman will make sure to feed Ryou as well as keep his favorite tea on hand as often as possible. She wants to make sure he is healthy as well as happy.

Who is more likely to stand up to anyone for the other? Considering how powerful these two can get I don't think there is an either one here. Ryou's own grandmother gave Yang the blessing to fist fight an Elder God, and Ryou himself is ready to throw down if he has too, as well as having fought a god himself too. In the end though, it is the calm and collected ones you need to watch out for more. If the culprit in question is truly beyond redemption and a blight on life, Ryou will take someone out and no one will find the body.

Who is the most likely to prepare a surprise for the other? Remember how Yang enjoys showing her affection in various ways? This is another one of those, and yes, she will get small surprised for Ryou. Be it wood carvings of certain places, people, or items, or personalized object of some sort, even a keychain perhaps, Yang will surprise him with such things. But I feel he would do the same with Yang, and possibly be something that would entirely catch her off guard.

Who makes the other pinky promise not to do certain things? They both do, making the other promise not to run headlong into things, or get them selves hurt. After having been through so damn much on either side, they know what each other is capable of, as well as the dangers that don't scare them no matter what. So a pinky promise is something I can see happening easily between them, and trying to uphold it.

Who puts a blanket over the other when they fall asleep on the couch? Here it might be a toss up. But more than likely it would be Ryou coming across Yang having succumb to sleep or exhaustion on the couch or in a chair, maybe even a desk. Woman tries too much at once and tries to keep notes and information, and will end up dropping things. So it would most likely be him to pull a blanket up and over her. But he's no exempt from experiencing the same thing, because if Yang were too find him asleep somewhere as well, then he'd be softly tucked in, and her staying close to reassure with her presence and warmth.

[icedthoma]

love-sick

--This isn’t a oneshot request, although it could be. I’m curious as to what Todoroki would be like if he was sick!

Pairing: Todoroki Shouto x Reader

Summary: Who would have guessed Todoroki Shouto would come down with a cold, after your first date nonetheless.

Notes: This was intended to be the sequel to a bad case of loving you, but this can also be read as a standalone fic. 

You couldn't resist adding a little spring to your step as you made your way down the sidewalk, fresh out of your first date with Todoroki Shouto. He was so sweet the entire time, blushing up a storm when your hands touched and insisting he pay for everything with a shiny black credit card that suspiciously looked like it belonged to his father.

You were on cloud nine, your head spinning with warm memories of the previous hours.

It was only natural that the sky decided to open up and pour down on you at that time.

You let out a cry of surprise and darted to the nearest shop, finding refuge in the roof's overhang. Of all the days to wear a white dress. The damage wasn't that bad, but it could have been worse. You didn't have an umbrella, how were you supposed to get home?

"Screw the forecast," you muttered, staring at the scurrying people outside in the downpour, some with umbrellas, some without. You rubbed your arms as goosebumps appeared on your skin, the chill of the rain getting to you. “Well, they say that the best thing to do when it rains, is to let it rain.”

While you were seriously considering just waiting the rain out under the roof of this store, a loud voice suddenly called your name.

At first you thought you were just imagining things, but then you heard it again.

"Todoroki-kun!" you shouted, relief flooding you. "Over here!"

A red and white-haired blur ran past, skidding to a stop in front of you. Shouto was dripping wet, and he was breathing hard as the two of you stood in silence.

You tried not to focus on the little drops of water sparkling in his hair.

"Hi," he breathed.

You laughed and pulled on his arm. "You're such a dork. You actually came back..."

"Of course," he said. "You didn't bring an umbrella. Plus...I didn't want your clothes to be ruined." You could feel your cheeks growing hot at his words. Casting an embarrassed glance up at the taller boy, you could see his reddened blush.

"Well, thank you," you said brightly in an attempt to defuse the tension between the two of you. "I was about to just wait the rain out under here."

"I would never forgive myself if that happened," Shouto said seriously. You nodded, a little involuntary shiver passing through your body. Todoroki's eyes narrowed, and he immediately shrugged his jacket off. "Here, put this on."

"Wait, really?" you exclaimed, your heart beating double time as he offered it to you.

"Don't worry about it," he assured you with a smile that almost made your heart melt. "The cold doesn't bother me, anyway."

"Was that a Frozen reference?"

"Perhaps."

You snorted a laugh as you slid your arms through the sleeves of his jacket. It was so warm, the chill of the rain seeping away in an instant as you wrapped it around yourself. The jacket was slightly too big for you, its sleeves hanging loose and the bottom of it reaching to about your mid-thigh. You couldn't resist subtly sniffing it, inhaling the fresh smell of his cologne.

There was a look of satisfaction on Todoroki's face as he examined you.

"You look...small."

"Hey!" you yelled indignantly, lightly smacking him with one of your loose sleeves. "Who are you calling small?"

He chuckled as he fended off your attack with one hand. "It's not an insult," he said. "I like seeing you in it. Anyway, if we hurry, you can make the next train home..."

You gaped open-mouthed at him, your last three braincells trying to figure out how he could say something so heart-stopping and continue like nothing happened.

Curse your bluntness, Todoroki.

At the station, you were about to take his jacket off to give it back to him, but Shouto stopped you, pulling the one fallen sleeve back over your shoulder. "Give it to me tomorrow at school."

"What? You're going to go home in the rain like that?" You gestured to his black button-down shirt. "What if you get sick?"

He looked up at the ceiling thoughtfully. “Hmm. I think I’ll be fine.” Pulling you closer to him by the pockets of his jacket, Shouto pressed his mouth to yours, silencing your protests in an instant. You closed your eyes and lost yourself in the gentle feel of his lips moving on yours and his hands encircling your face.

"You don't want to miss your train," he said suddenly after pulling away.

Way to kill the mood...

"Shouto!" you complained, jumping away from him and folding your arms, a little annoyed that the moment was ruined. "I'm serious..."

He laughed at the joking glare you shot at him. "I'll see you tomorrow."

"Yup," you replied, a better response not coming to mind, and you hurried off with the intoxicating scent from his jacket flooding your senses and warming you all the way down to the tips of your toes.

-----------

"ACHOO."

"Bless y--"

"ACHOO."

"B--"

"ACHOO!"

You stared deadpan at the sneezing boy beside you. "You done?"

Todoroki nodded, his face flushed and nose red. "I think so," he said.

"You look awful."

"Does someone have a cold?" Kaminari teased, turning around. "Get it, because hiS QUIRK IS--"

"Everyone!" Iida yelled, silencing the other students stressing about their midterms coming up soon. "The official school day has begun. Let us all show the utmost respect to our esteemed educator, and--"

"Shut up!" Bakugou drawled from the front.

"Are you sure you're okay?" you whispered as your homeroom teacher rolled out of his sleeping bag and headed to the front (which was honestly such a mood). "If you feel terrible, you shouldn't have come to school!"

"Never better," Shouto said.

That was a lie.

"Todoroki-kun, what's going on with you today?" Midoriya asked with concern during lunch. "You're not eating anything, you haven't been yourself all day, is something wrong?"

"I...I think I have a headache," Shouto said faintly, resting his head on his arms and shutting his eyes.

In the end, the two of you convinced him to see Recovery Girl, who (after a quick smooch on Shouto's head) decreed that he had to rest in her office for an hour or two.

"I don't get why I have to wait here," Shouto seethed. "I'm okay."

"Hey, your well-being is a greater priority," you interrupted. "If you continue to push yourself, you may get worse, even with Recovery Girl's healing. Stay here for a bit and sleep, okay?"

"Fine," he groaned, flopping down on a cot and folding his arms.

You sat on the edge of his bed and stroked his hair lightly. He sighed and leaned into your touch. "Come on, you know it's for the best."

"Yeah."

"Maybe running around in the rain wasn't the best idea," you said, feeling slightly guilty. "Added with all the work you've been doing, and-"

Todoroki opened his eyes and sat up, catching your hand and holding it in between his. "I don't regret a thing," he said. "With you, it was totally worth it."

[wintersoldierland]

our worlds colliding

In the cryo, time is irrelevant. James is aware that he’s there, it’s not like Hydra, but it still feels like torture.

He cannot escape the pain and the guilt, and each second is agony when he sees the eyes of his victims, life slowly dripping out of them.

He cannot escape Stark.

Try as he might, James can’t forget the sight of him there, in that bunker, broken and sad and so so resigned. He can’t forget how he didn't want to fight but somehow the Winter Soldier won against him again. How the triggers that activated him also kept him close to the surface.

The Soldier likes to fight.

He can deny is as much as he wants, but James knows that the part of him that’s the Winter Soldier likes the fight. Likes the adrenaline, the danger, the feeling of being a better fighter.

It’s yet another reason to hate himself as if he has too few of those.

But the cryo that felt like a blessing turned into a curse.

He’s just stuck here, in his own head, mangled and fucked up, and he can’t escape, can’t tell them to get him out, can’t close his eyes because it’s all in his brain.

James just has to be there, exist, and suffer.

That’s when the images start.

He’s sitting on top of a tall Tower that’s overviewing New York, calm and happy. The sun is setting and he knows that Tony will be here soon. It's their tradition.

“Hey, handsome,” comes a quip and James smiles, turning to face his husband and opening his arms.

Tony falls into them easily and cuddles close, fitting into James’s body like he was made to sit there. 

“Hey, baby,” James croons quietly, nuzzling into his hair. “Tired?”

“Yeah,” Tony sighs. “I swear, it’s like having toddlers!”

James laughs fondly. “Yeah, they’re a bit much, sometimes,” he agrees. He loves their team but, by God, they sometimes had one collective braincell and weren’t all that keen on using it.

“Steve spilled champagne on Nat’s new dress and I think she was going to murder him but then he looked ready to cry...” Tony trails off, before picking the story up again. “And that’s not the worst thing! Clint had the audacity to suggest that since the dress is already ruined they can...ruin it further and I’m pretty sure I almost caught them going at it in the bathroom.”

He almost chokes laughing, both at the situation and at Tony’s tone. It is kind of like catching your sibling having sex. Pretty gross.

“Poor darlin’,” he coos then, rubbing his hands up and down Tony’s back under his shirt. His husband melts right into him. “How ��bout a bubble bath and some hot chocolate?”

“Hmmm... I love you,” Tony sighs and kisses his neck.

James just laughs and hoists him up. Tony looks stunning in the setting sun-

-then he jerks away from the dream.

It must be a dream, James knows that, even if it feels like a memory. he knows that because he’s currently in cryo in Wakanda and Tony Stark rightfully hates him. Rightfully hates Steve as well.

Life isn’t that golden, sun-kissed version he just saw. 

Yet, the dreams don’t stop. James dreams about normal things - visiting the most amazing lab he has ever seen, cuddling in bed, showering together, early morning and late nights, the Avengers getting called out.

He feels like the time has slowed, and he’s living the life he will never get but desperately wants.

James always waits for those dreams because they’re the only break he gets from the memories of pain and blood. Sometimes his, sometimes others.

Those sweet, soft and golden dreams keep him from going insane inside his own head, keep him from begging for death.

James doesn’t deserve this kindness but he still selfishly grabs them and tries not to let go. It’s easier to live in that fantasy than in the hell of his own making.

The dreams escalate until there’s one he loves with all of his heart.

He and his husband are sitting on the sofa, watching a stupid movie when Tony comments on one name in particular.

“Chelsey is such a stupid name,” he mutters under his breath. “All I can think of is a bitchy cheerleader.”

“So you wouldn’t want to name our child that?” James asks before he can stop himself and for a second, everything is frozen. They never talked about kids.

“You-,” Tony starts, before choking it back. He looks down at his husband to see the tears in his eyes and the disbelieving smile on his face. “You want kids with me?”

He sounds like he’s in awe and James can only laugh wetly. “Of course,” he says softly but with passion. He’s never been surer. “I want everythin’ with you, love.”

Tony stares at him for a second before hugging him tightly, arms wrapped around his waist, whole body shaking. James just hugs him back and hides his tears in his husband’s hair.

“I’d name a girl Morgan,” he hears Tony whisper, voice still awed and soft.

“I love it,” he comments, wanting to look at Tony so-

-so James opens his eyes and gasps, seeing the bright light over him and concerned voices around.

He’s wet and shaking and the world is turning at normal speed again, but he still can’t help the sob that’s tearing from his chest.

James wants that reality back. He wants his husband and his team and the baby girl they will end up having. 

Morgan.

He wants Morgan.

But all he gets is Steve’s concerned face, the cold water on his skin and only one arm.

In another universe James Stark-Barnes surges up on the bed, shaking from imaginary cold and then gladly collapses into his husband’s warm arms. He looks into Tony’s concerned eyes and manages a shaky smile.

“They’ll get there, darlin’,” he murmurs in a shaken, rough voice. “I know it. It’s all comin’ together.”

Tony kisses him lightly and smiles back, albeit sadly. “I just hope their Tony will hug the hell out of their James.”

James snickers. “They’ll get there,” he repeats. “You’ll see.”

another part of my dream au, which is here and here

[thetunewillcome]

[Fic] Empty and Desolate, The Air

Relationship: Aziraphale/Crowley

Rating: Mature (graphic descriptions of violence)

Important Tags: Hurt/Comfort, Established Relationship, South Downs, Language and Communication, T.S. Eliot-Inspired

Word Count: 3871

Summary: Ever a guardian, Aziraphale kept watch. Sliver-shafts of moonlight sliced ribbons across Crowley’s face. The emptiness of it unnerved the angel. Even in slumber, his expressive face had always told stories. Syllables shifted in the corners of his mouth; sentences found themselves punctuated with the movement of an eyebrow. Now, only still silence, even in sleep. Heavenly forces decide the best way to get their once-dutiful soldier back is to slaughter his only real reason for rebellion. Their attempt leaves Crowley wounded and voiceless. Aziraphale tries his best to heal him and accept the soundlessness of this new verse of their song.

[Read on AO3] or below (hidden under the cut b/c violence)

"Yet when we came back, late, from the Hyacinth garden,

Your arms full, and your hair wet, I could not

Speak, and my eyes failed, I was neither

Living nor dead, and I knew nothing,

Looking into the heart of light, the silence.

Oed' und leer das Meer."

- T.S. Eliot, The Wasteland

All was silent save for the language of the garden: birdsong and the buzzing of bees.

The blessed blade slid through skin and sinew, stilling as it settled inside his ribcage.  Searing pain burned in red-hot flashes across his chest.  Breath caught; lung collapsed.  Gritting his teeth against the gnawing heat of the metal, he squeezed his eyes shut, bowing his head in a silent refusal to give them the pleasure of hearing his torment, seeing his fear.  A disobedient, agonized grunt escaped his lips as the angel dragged the blade out, inch by inch, deliberately slow.  Warmth blossomed across his stomach.  Through slitted eyes, he watched his silver blood stain his shirt, drip from Sandalphon’s retreating hand.

Think of something, his mind pulsed.  Think of something.  Say something.  Do something.  Or else.   Weakly, he lifted his knees an inch from the soil, the start of an attempt to stand.  The metal shackles binding his hands behind his back scalded his wrists.  A hand  grabbed a fistful of his auburn hair, jerking his head up and back.  Golden eyes met lilac ones.

“Come, now,” Gabriel chuckled from where he stood behind him.  “You’re doubly trapped.  You’re not going anywhere.”  A pause as Sandalphon shifted closer and Gabriel said to him, “we need to get a move on, before we’re interrupted.”

Oh, you’ve got time, Crowley thought.  Aziraphale wouldn’t be back from the shops for hours.  Jaw clenched tightly, he glanced sideways at the empty patch of ground he had intended to fill with lavender that afternoon.  Infuriatingly fitting that his story would end here, in the garden he had so carefully tended for nearly forty years, behind the home they had come to cherish.  More so, even, than Eden, this place was their beginning; now, with one blind step across an invisible line, it would be his destruction and their end.

Gabriel spoke again to Crowley, voice full of arrogance and loathing.  “You fooled us back then, I’ll give you that, but look at you now.  I knew if we gave you time, let you play human in this stupid town for long enough, you’d let your guard down.  We’ve had that circle sitting out here for, oh, months now – concealed from demonic sight, of course – and you walked right into it.  So you will die, and Aziraphale will eventually forget why he turned away from us.  He will return where he belongs and he will fight for us again, in the new war to come.  In time, he won’t even remember you.”  Gabriel smiled, inverted in Crowley’s field of vision.

“Never,” Crowley choked out.  “He would never go back to –“  Something hot and wet pressed against his neck: the blade.  Instinctively, he jerked sideways and felt the edge cut a small track in his taught skin.

Gabriel’s grip on his hair tightened.  “Enough.  Time to die.”  His eyes fell shut, inner voice pleading with him to take action while the throbbing pain in his gut pulled his focus and slowed his thoughts.  Nothing came to mind but Aziraphale: the horror that would mar his lovely face when he discovered Crowley’s body, the crumble and collapse into grief, his blue-green eyes dulled under pooled tears.  Every speck of power Crowley possessed trembled uselessly just underneath his skin, detained by the shackles and the circle around him.  There was nothing he could do.

A tremor hummed through the air as the blade bit into his neck.  A breathy cry, foreign to his ears but coming from somewhere in him, penetrated his cotton-muffled consciousness.  Nails drew droplets of blood from the palms of his clenched fists.  Light was streaming in from somewhere to his right.  Metal cut deeper and his voice sputtered to silence.  All was blinding pain and light and quicksilver sticky warmth cascading down his chest, and then, a lightening.  His hair, released.  The blade, lifted.

Eyes flew open and took in the garden cast in brilliant white, a photo negative.  A hallucination, perhaps, as braincells starved and withered?  Or the light humans said they saw before death claimed them?  Air moved around him.  A flash: a lightning strike?  Head heavy, he folded forward, ink spreading across the edges of his vision.  One final fall, into darkness yet again.

Soft hands caught him: one cradling the back of his head, the other amplifying pain with firm pressure on his neck.  A burst of short-lived strength.  The circle had been broken.  The restraints tumbled from his wrists.  He was laid gently down in the cool embrace of fern and columbine.  White curls.  Bright, panicked eyes.  Aziraphale, he tried to say, run.  They want you back.  What are you doing wasting time on me, you perfect idiot?  Aziraphale, he tried to say, I love you.  I’m sorry.  But instead of words, a sickly, wet sound.

“Shh, don’t –  Don’t try to speak.”  Sweat and tears mixed on the angel’s face, and flecks of gold dotted his skin.  Fingers stroked his cheek.  His face was wet, too.  “I know it hurts and I – I am so sorry, dear, but I have to staunch the bleeding.”  More pressure.  Waves of agony behind his eyes.

“They’re gone now.  You’re safe.  You – oh,” and Aziraphale’s tender voice broke as his eyes swept over Crowley’s chest.  A hand found the gash in his stomach and pain bloomed there, too.  “I know it was holy metal, but – we have to try."  The angel's voice was an unsteady song, breathy and full of vibrato.  "Crowley, listen, with anything you have left, you need to try, okay?”  With a reassuring nod, Aziraphale closed his eyes.

Hazily, he lingered in the homecoming of Aziraphale's face before him, a sense of misplaced calm settling over his body.  It wouldn’t work – Angelic blades permanently injure occult entities deep beneath their corporations’ flesh. – but he would try, for him.  Crowley reached down into his core, desperately shoving pain aside, and found reserves of frantic energy.  Power surged through his veins.  Cells divided, mercurial blood replenishing.  It wasn’t a solution, but it would buy him time, and it was the best he could do.

Aziraphale’s warm energy flowed over his neck and ribcage.  The sharp stinging calmed slightly to a pulsing ache.  Weak and exhausted, Crowley watched Aziraphale concentrate, beautifully in his element, until the angel’s eyes reopened and fear took back its hold on his visage.  Shakily, the hand on his neck lifted.  Crowley read surprise and slight relief in the angel’s eyes.

“An improvement, certainly,” he said, trying to sound calm, though his breath came shallow and quick.  “Bandages, now.  Ready?”  A snap sounded in the distance; gauze wrapped tightly around his wounds, covering rows of stitches that had strung themselves through jagged skin.  “Much better.  You’ll be alright.”  You’ve always been a terrible liar, he thought.  Superficial patching was all their energy could do.  “Let’s get you inside.”

Tenderly, Aziraphale gathered him in his arms and lifted him.  Fresh pain burst forth as his body shifted.  He fought to keep heavy eyelids open and caught still images of the scene: evening primroses inching open for the night; hyacinths, named for the one whose blood first created them, dripping with silver; the smudged, broken edge of a devil’s trap in the dirt; a tree trunk sprayed with golden spatter.

At the last image, his eyes opened wide, mind sharpened with worry.  He ran a heavy hand over Aziraphale’s chest, earning him a concerned look.  An attempt to say Yours? required breath that wouldn’t come, and so he gestured vaguely at the tree and looked up into the angel’s pale face.

“Oh, darling,” and the hold on his body tightened, “it’s not mine.  Don’t worry.”  Eyes fell closed.  “Here, we’re almost there.”  The creaky hinges of their front door.  The click of the lock behind them.  The ten footfalls to their bedroom.  The soft give of their duvet.  Aziraphale’s presence began to draw back and Crowley shot out his hand, grabbing a wrist that froze at his touch.  “I’m not going anywhere, but I can’t let you–“  His voice tightened and he swallowed thickly.  “I’ll clean you up, change of clothes, okay?”

A snap, but nothing happened.  Aziraphale swayed on his feet, blinking.  “Shit,” he whispered, then recovered his soothing tone.  “Have to do it the human way, then.  But…”  Brows furrowed, he glanced at the bedroom door, then back down at Crowley.  “Well, in a moment, when you’re settled.”

His vision darkened, then returned as he felt the familiar pressure of the angel’s body on the mattress next to him.  Aziraphale moved cautiously, studying Crowley’s face as he settled down and slid fingers through rust-red hair.  Lips pressed a kiss to his sweat-slick forehead.

Sleep tempted him with escape, but as his eyes closed again, he heard a panicked “You –  Crowley?” and forced them back open.  “You need to stay awake.  It’s vitally important.”  Tears tumbled down Aziraphale’s face, and Crowley tried desperately to obey, but there were shadows curling in around the edges of his eyes.  More than anything, he wanted to speak, but their energy had only been enough to stop some of the bleeding, not repair deeper damage.  Thank you, he would have said.  Stay.  I’ll return.  Against his will, he slipped into sleep.

---

A sweet smell drifted into the cottage's studio on dreamy, heavy afternoon air.  Perched on a stool, Crowley glared at a canvas smeared with azure hues.  The paint was not behaving properly, and the whole piece was one more bad brushstroke away from spontaneous combustion when the sound of the door opening made him pause, paintbrush raised.  Aziraphale entered, and the sight of him spread a grin across Crowley’s face: he was dotted from head to toe in flour.

“That’s off to a beautiful start,” the angel said, words slowing as he took notice of Crowley’s expression.  “I like… What?”  A glance downward.  “Oh.”  A sheepish smile.  “I thought I’d try my hand at brioche.  The book made it look simple enough, but, well, I ran into some difficulty with the mixer, and then after it all, you’re expected to have the patience to wait for the dough to rise for hours before baking it…”

Grabbing hold of his hand, Crowley tugged Aziraphale closer to him and wiped flour from his cheek with a thumb.  “Couldn’t wait, could you?” he asked slyly, and guilt crossed the angel’s face.  “Well, it smells delicious.”  Leaning on the edge of the stool, he spread his legs wider and pulled Aziraphale forward by the hips until the space between them disappeared.  “Still, I thought patience was a virtue,” he murmured as he tilted his chin up and kissed Aziraphale’s lips.

“It is.”  Another kiss.  “But there’s no harm in speeding things along, either, sometimes.”

There was an absurd beauty in the realization that the angel before him could drown nations, burn sinful cities to the ground, plant dreams into the minds of men that would alter the course of human history, and yet, here he was, settled in South Downs with a demon, miracling dough to rise.  Crowley looked up at him as if he were the sun itself, wondering if Aziraphale had any idea of the limitlessness of his power.

As he had done countless times since the move, since the peaceful seclusion of the cottage had made it first safe to voice his ancient adoration, Crowley opened his mouth to say I love you, angel, but only heard a sickening sputter.  In horrified confusion, he pulled shaking hands away from Aziraphale’s hips and touched the ruin of his throat.  Where there had been blue paint on his fingertips, now, there was argent blood.  When he looked up from his hands, Aziraphale had disappeared and the stool was collapsing under him and he was falling, voiceless, back into the darkness of sleep.

---

The feeling of falling jolted him awake.  Gold eyes flew open and a second passed and then the pain rushed back to him all at once in a train-wreck of sensation.  Teeth ground.  Muscles seized.  Hands dug into the duvet.  Then Aziraphale’s hands were on him, warm and healing.  Dark circles had formed under bloodshot blue eyes, and his skin looked frighteningly pale in the half-light of the room.

Angelic energy smoothed the edges of the pain, but it still rang through him, the equivalent of covering one’s ears against a shrill alarm.  The hands withdrew and he watched Aziraphale wipe his face with a shirtsleeve.  He had no idea how long he had been asleep.

“You… you’re…”  Aziraphale, voice hushed and relieved, reached for words that unraveled on his tongue.  "I..."

Testing his body, Crowley managed a small breath in, all that his collapsed lung would allow, but the air died silently in his throat.  He raised his hand and mimed writing in mid-air.

“Oh!  Um, yes, hang on,” and Aziraphale grabbed a book and pen from the nightstand.  “Here,” he said as he held the pen out to Crowley, opened to a random page.  “Write in the margins.”

In jagged script, Crowley scrawled two words and tipped the book so Aziraphale could read them.  “Love you”

A stifled sob.  “I know.  And I love you.  You know that.  You're my world, my everything.”  Aziraphale’s thumb traced his jawline and Crowley leaned ever so slightly into the touch.

"They’re after you.   Go”

Shock and offense at the suggestion.  “No.  I won’t leave you, and you’re in no condition to be moved.  Don’t be absurd.”  A deep breath.  “They’re not a threat anymore.  Not for the time being, anyway.”

Crowley raised an inquisitive eyebrow.

For the first time in two days, Aziraphale looked away from Crowley, gaze hardening.  “I’m not exactly sure what happened.  It was all a blur.  My only concern was you.  Whatever I did to them, well, they deserved it, and I doubt they’ll be able to return.  At least, not soon.  But if they do, I’ll be right here” he said quietly, voice warming as he returned his focus to Crowley’s face, “and they won’t come near you again.”

"Should be dead”  To clarify, he added an “I” to the left of the phrase.

Aziraphale winced and exhaled slowly. “And yet, you’re not.  You’re here.  Perhaps I interrupted them before… Or… I don’t know…”  His voice grew high and tight.  “I’m not going to question it.  You can’t… because I couldn’t…”

The emotions battling on Aziraphale’s face became too much for his foggy mind to handle.  Crowley looked away and noticed his stained, torn clothes.  With a look of disgust, he gestured at them and the angel’s face twisted in guilt.  “Sorry.  Any ounce of energy that returns to me, I’ve routed right into healing you.  So I can’t miracle you clean, and I didn’t want to hurt you, doing it by hand.”  Not to mention he’d have to leave the room to get supplies, and he couldn’t pry himself away from Crowley’s side.

Crowley’s expression told him he was being ridiculous.  “Fine, if you feel up for it, I will.”  A small, weak nod.  “Okay, I’ll…”  Aziraphale stared at him as if worried he would disappear.  “I will be right back.”

Drifting in and out of consciousness, Crowley heard Aziraphale reenter the room, felt the gentle tug of fabric being removed from under him.  Like that magician’s trick, he mused, with the tablecloth and plates.  Except he was already shattered into sharp pieces.  Not much more damage could be done.

Wet cloth slid over skin, back and forth on silver stains.  Humans have been bathing bodies just like this in parlors and in morgues since their departure from the Garden.  Crowley had seen them do it, feeling like a voyeur in the face of their human grief every time.  He had heard them speak to the dead: apologies, confessions, questions hovering permanently in the air without answer.  Only silence from the dead, and now, from him.  What power lived in language, to prove I am here.  I can ask and answer.  Listen.  Under the reverent attention of his angel, he was lulled to sleep once more.

---

Ever a guardian, Aziraphale kept watch.  Sliver-shafts of moonlight sliced ribbons across Crowley’s face.  The emptiness in it unnerved the angel.  Even in slumber, his expressive face had always told stories.  Syllables shifted in the corners of his mouth; sentences found themselves punctuated with the movement of an eyebrow.  Now, only still silence.

Crowley’s presence had always felt thunderously loud to him.  Even in the early days, he would shatter Aziraphale’s peace with surprise greetings, bursting forth from a crowd or calling his name across a room.  Always a retort, always a bark of laughter or a groan of discontent.  Somehow, even when he listened, he listened with his whole body; Aziraphale could read volumes in the shifts of his feet and the tilt of his chin.  Sharing a home allowed him to hear new sounds he hadn’t been privy to before.  After a night of drinking, Crowley snored.  When concentrating in quiet spaces, he hummed to himself.  He shouted at sappy films and cursed at cooking mistakes and Aziraphale, who had always lived in lonesome quiet, had come to cherish every word.

Exhaustion ignited into rage.  They had no right to his voice, his life.  What did they even know of him?  Ancient questions?  Disobedient objections?  He was so much more: faltering bravado, endearing temper, sibilant begging, whispered affection, unwavering love.  His.  He was his.  And Aziraphale would do whatever needed to be done to keep him here.

Shifting into his true form that day had taken so much from him, and he had regretted it instantly upon realizing just how deeply they had injured Crowley.  Angelic energy took time to rebuild once depleted, and as it sparked and replenished in his core, he drained it into Crowley’s body, emptying himself again and again.  He hadn’t left the room for days, at least.  Dust had settled around them on the four-poster bed.

His mind wandered, recalling memories and verses to pass the time, but when it ventured near that afternoon in the garden, he stopped it.  He refused to consider what he had done to Gabriel, what it meant for him.  If Crowley’s life could only be purchased with Gabriel’s, if he had incurred a debt only repayable with his own Fall, he accepted those terms without hesitation.

Every instinct in him called for prayer, but his belief in a God who listens had withered half a century ago.  Still, he spoke.  It was a prayer, yes, but not to Her.  It started with an invocation, the one name in which he held unwavering faith.  “Crowley,” he breathed, lingering on the holy sound of his name.  “You’ve always been so strong.  Your will becomes reality here on Earth.  I’ve seen it happen.  Give it a try.  For me.  Forgive me for not being enough to heal you on my own.  Forgive me for needing you so selfishly.  You can save yourself, I know it.  You have the power, somewhere.  This can’t be it.  We’re meant to have forever.”  And ever.  Amen.

---

“Look like hell”

“Just the sight of you awake is lovely, my dear.”

“Not me.  You”

A shaky laugh.  “Haven’t exactly had the energy to keep up appearances, now.  So sorry.”  He had lost track of how much time he had spent lying quietly next to Crowley, watching, healing, hoping.

Crowley, propped upright now against the headboard and pillows, gave a fond smile and wrote “Standards?”

“Oh, stop,” Aziraphale chuckled as he unbuttoned Crowley’s pajama shirt.

Crowley’s physical pain was still present, but it had dulled significantly, and somehow, inconceivably, the invisible cancer of the blessed metal’s damage had ceased to spread.  It should have consumed him, and yet, it hadn’t.  They each had their separate theories – Aziraphale’s strength, Crowley’s willpower, the humanizing effects of isolation from above and below, the otherness of their own side – but neither would ever voice them.  Neither dared to question it.  And he was still far from out of the woods: he couldn’t even draw the breath required to ask for a compass.

“Focus, now.”  Aziraphale placed both hands on the bandage below Crowley’s left rib and closed his eyes.  Crowley did his part, meeting Aziraphale’s energy with the little of his own he had cultivated.

When they were both spent, Aziraphale leaned back, their shoulders touching.  Slowly, Crowley laced their fingers together.  His eyes were closed.  A scar ringed round his wrist, a souvenir of captivity.  The silence of the room pressed heavily on Aziraphale’s eardrums.  He wished for anything to shatter it: a word, a laugh, a breath, even, just the whisper of an inhale.  Nothing came.

He tried to be thankful for the silence.  After all, the air could be filled with angelic fury, with the sharp hissing of fiery weapons.  It could crackle with burning feathers.  It could carry a death rattle to his ears, bringing with it his ending, too.  The way things were headed, they still could communicate; it could have been much, much worse.  Aziraphale sat, warm palm pressed against Crowley’s cold one, and attempted to accept the soundlessness of this new verse of their song.

---

Eventually, Crowley urged him away from his post.

“Eat something”

“Shower”

“I’m fine”

"Get some fresh air”

“Please eat”

An irritated eye-roll when the angel insisted he wouldn’t miracle up food for himself.  “Pears are ripe on the trees.  Go”

Finally, he listened, disappearing for an hour here and there but always returning, a homing pigeon carrying stories and healing hands back again to Crowley’s quiet sanctuary.  One day, as he reluctantly walked down the hall, bedroom at his back, something stopped him.

Aziraphale had heard the first word ever born on a human tongue.  When Adam opened his mouth and began to name the creatures of the Garden and the Heavens, a strange and lovely music formed, so different from the celestial language of angels it defied comparison.  As Adam christened his wife, baptized his body – bone, flesh, rib – the young angel cherished each vibration.  How precious, the melodies of the human voice.  Out of that language, variations branched forth, harmonies.  Eventually, Babel brought discord, baffling and beautiful.  The early ages had rippled with vocal ringing, and as Aziraphale loved the humans, so he loved their languages.

But, oh, no word ever mattered more than this.  Its sandpaper sound was a shipwreck, dredged out of the deep, tempest-tossed nearly past recognition, but within its hull lay golden promise.  It was a name, just like the first.  Its syllables rose and broke over him, shattering months of silence and leaving him shaking in its wake.  “Aziraphale,” he heard.  A clipped song, a single note of adoration.  Spinning, he took in the impossible sight of Crowley leaning against the doorframe.  Carefully, carefully, with stunned and speechless gratitude, the angel wrapped him up in trembling arms.

Notes: It's not every day that you write something, go reading some of your favorite poems looking for inspiration for a title, and find lines that almost exactly describe what you've already written. (If I've been possessed by Mr. Eliot, I have absolutely no objections.)

The title comes from “Oed’ und leer das Meer” which means “empty and desolate the sea." Eliot borrowed the line from Tristan und Isolde.

Aziraphale’s prayer is very loosely based on the Lord’s Prayer.