#blackgirlblogger

[cassiekaygee]

[h0neycoatedangel]

Why is it that every time a girl’s room is dirty it’s just clothes, water bottles, cans, discarded papers, and skin products.

[thisjournalspeaks]

Well... Where did the time go?

I started this blog over seven years ago as a way to share my writing and inner thoughts. However, over the years, I haven't been able to write much due to various reasons and feeling like I lost my spark. Now, I am slowly regaining that spark and the desire to write again. This time, I really want and need to make my voice heard. The idea came when I was 21, and now at 28, I am ready to make it happen. I appreciate anyone who joins me on this journey. I hope you all enjoy what I have to share. Until later,

-Ari

[2geminii]

2025 is the year it all changes 🤍

[voyeuristicvixen]

Captns Log No. 38_Here’s a lil story all about how...

My life got flipped turned upside dowwwwn, lemme take a minute just sit right there I will tell you how I lost everything in a town called SL! XD LMAO

Yes yall, I and Waverino Amor divorced. *Sad violins* We have had such a great time together, a great run. He means a lot to me and I always wish and pray for the best for him. We lived together in RL yall, we did the thing! But we tried to force circumstances too soon before we were truly ready. We prayed together, we got the relationship therapy apps on our phones, we communicated EVERYTHING clearly... but at the end of the day none of that matters if the timing is not right. I would not change a thing, we had such a blast and we are truly best friends I still talk to him everyday. We explored so much of ourselves with each other and that is something I will forever be grateful for.

He joined SL to be closer to me, he moved in with me to be closer to me. I am eternally grateful for that love, and companionship. It is what I desperately needed at that time, I am still greiving the passing of my Godfather who was a dad to me, he raised me and I never got closure about his death.

Being with Wav was a trauma bond to be completely transparent. I was terrified of what I would do to myself, with to much isolation. I needed that feeling of love, and companionship and the hope that I could create my own new family dynamic and build something with him.

Writing this post is helping me release a lot of pent up feelings I haven’t allowed myself to really grieve because we both have been stuck in survival mode. IT WILL LITERALLY RUIN RELATIONSHIPS. When you are stuck on the responsibilities of maintaining financial stability and at the same time healing your inner wounds and triggers being mirrored by an incredible person in your environment that you desperately want family with. It is so much pressure. We had to take a step back to give back to ourselves as individuals.

I do not regret that decision, but I do miss him and the feeling of security in love that came with being together. Sometimes it feels like, well if you at least have love or someone with you then you feel like you have some sense of control over your life when everything else isn’t balanced. But  that quickly comes to a head and can only be maintained for so long if individuals do not have full focus and alignment with their purpose for themselves separate from their partner. Now we are leveling up in incredible ways and I couldn’t be more proud of us. Its not what looks good on the outside that matters.

Our last moments together on SL were so precious to me, he really made my Rez day special, because I didn’t have anyone else on the grid to celebrate me. He took me to the ocean, we explored this marine center and it was really sweet.

It was during Ramadan too, so we were serving high fashion Muslim lovers to a T. I didnt change out of that outfit till like yesterday, I wore that same fit for a whole month after that date. My heart </3.

These  last few pics are literally the last times we hung out on the grid, he was already living with me and we would just be sitting right next to each other smoking weed lol.

& we’re both total nerds so I did not have to force him to go to the Harry Potter sim at all! LMAO

I carried A LOT of responsibility and burdens in this relationship but its taught me to advocate for myself and to have a higher sense of self respect. Things got to a point where verbally we were abusive and my RL space was disrespected. We always will attract the love we feel we deserve, this showed me where I wasnt showing up for myself, where I wasnt honoring myself, and how I was disrespecting myself. Because no one else will if you dont show them that its okay by doing it to yourself. He came to my space and reflected exactly how I felt about myself and my environment and I needed that wake up call.

I hope that this log will help someone else out there who feels like they need companionship or love in order to heal from trauma. Connection and community is a big aspect of healing but we have to be more vigilant with our own energy and healing and showing up for ourselves FIRST AND FOREMOST. We can overextend ourselves with energy we don’t even have trying to force healing outcomes that our spirit and souls and emotional bodies are not  truly ready for.

I see now how I was being controlling and stubborn with my perspective of what would be best for us both. I saw the potential of our greatness together and worked tirelessly to forge this path out for us against all that was being shown to me by spirit even if it meant ignoring my intuition and gut feelings in the process.

 Moving forward I am slowly getting back on the grid, I allowed my rentals to close out and I’m back on nomad timing, like the OG Foxey days. I am excited for whats to come though. I still got tons of ideas and I’m ready to play and just create and give to myself everything I seek in others.

*Lol as I finish this blog post he just texted me “Grand rising! I pray you’re doing well today. We must move forward always” I love that man. <3

[earthjrnl]

"My love is too delicate to have thrown back on my face" - Ntozake Shange, For Colored Girls Who have Considered Suicide / When the Rainbow is Enuf.

[bbyitsbri]

East Orange, NJ

[miscellaneousjay]

Started watching “The Legend of Vox Machina” last weekend and it’s been such a fun ride thus far!!!🤩🤩🤩

[xpuffpuffx]

Baddie baddie shot o’clock 🥃

[ursulawhosoever]

My hair is cute today 🥰

#BomDia #GoodMorning #GutenMorgen ☕

[cassiekaygee]

[h0neycoatedangel]

Hi!

Aysia, 15, black.

reading, baking, and cooking are my hobbies.

I’m really into the coquette, downtown girl and grunge aesthetic.

I’m here to spill my guts and to imitate the life I want.

Always looking for friends <3

[nattybpay]

Me

[2geminii]

Good Morning Babes,

Today we are being intentional! Drink your water, Go on a quick walk, eat as clean as you can!

Don’t give into temptations! I know it’s easier said than done but all it takes if for you to say “No.” and stick to that decision. Don’t try and negotiate with your goals!!

Make yourself proud today!

[ycnnah]

how to be a girl (black girl edition)

-keep some lipgloss on you.

-be as feminine as you want and don’t conform to stereotypes.

-keep candy, gum, lotion, & perfume on hand!

- skin: MOISTURIZED. but you knew that already. 🤭

- keep your edges laid no matter what.

this was inspired by bambietteamour! i just thought to recreate for us black girl baby dolls. 🎀 lmk if i should make a pt. 2 or more content!!

[abroadlifeactually]

Its a Vibe (Free of Ghosts)

Over the last several years my birthday has been a week-long celebration. My 30th was spent relaxing on a beach and partying in Aruba with my best friend, which ushered in the trend to always do something lavish for my birthday. I maintained this tradition with vacations and spa treatments over the years. However, things started to change when I turned 40. One, I was pregnant, and two, it was during the covid years, thus severely altering how I could celebrate.  Last year we took a trip to the Philippines as a 40th redux, and to give me much needed R&R since our move abroad earlier that year was pretty rough. It was an amazing trip, but it wasn’t the “all about me” birthday vacation I had gotten used to. Sunbeam had just started to ween off breastfeeding, so I was pumping for relief and doing my best to maintain her schedule while we were away. On our return home Sunbeam got sick in the airport leaving us quarantined in a tiny hospital room for 2 days with all our luggage, no wifi, cell phone service, or drinking water, and a toilet leaking all over the floor. But that’s a story for another time. 

This past birthday the realization set in that the old days of sipping champagne all day aren’t returning; but it’s okay because my life is evolving, and change is a natural part of growth. At first I felt the need to cling to my old bday tradition to hold on to my “bad b*tch” aesthetic. Being able to splurge on myself and luxuriate for several days made me confident and independent. However, now I’m in a place where trying to uphold those traditions along with my new responsibilities is much harder. It’s not impossible, but definitely requires a lot more effort and planning, which can feel like a lot.

So what does a good birthday look like now? Earlier this year we took a family vacation to the Maldives, and were planning a visit back west around the holidays, so traveling was not an option. I thought about what brings me joy now, as a woman with a family. Hearing the happy squeals of my child brings me life, so I opted to bring Sunbeam to an indoor play gym in the morning, since she’s still a little too young to really enjoy Disney.  We had the place to ourselves. Later that evening, my husband arranged for our nanny to come so we could enjoy the evening out. He planned a beautiful evening. We ate a 6 course meal in a private room at the top of a building with a breathtaking view of the city. I was all dressed up and felt beautiful. I thoroughly enjoyed spending the day with my family.

As my life continues to evolve, my birthday celebration has to take other factors into account. This encouraged me to reexamine my perspective on what makes my birthday meaningful, and embrace what comes with evolution. I’m grateful for the way my life is progressing and all the new experiences it brings, which makes these changes all the more welcome.

Now on another note….this birthday also indicated that an ex situationship has FINALLY moved on. I met my husband back in 2016, and with any new relationship it may take some time for ex lingerers to officially cut ties. But when I was done or over a person, I would totally disappear, they’d never hear from me again.  So when Hubby and I met, I may have gotten a rogue text here or there, but for the most part we just moved forward uninterrupted.

But there was one. An ex? Not sure you could call him that, it really never got that serious, so I’ll just say someone I dated briefly. This person would send happy birthday texts every year to no response. This shockingly went on for 6 YEARS. There were no other messages exchanged in between, because we weren’t in contact. But every year without fail I’d get a random text filled with bitmoji. One year the text came with 6 different Bitmojis…. I thought about responding a few times just to say I’m married, or I’m married and pregnant, or I’m married with a kid and don’t even live in the country anymore. But I couldn’t figure out how to bring that up with a happy birthday text, and also didn’t feel conversing, so opted for cold silence instead.

These messages were especially surprising because he was the “i’m so busy” type. He made it very clear he was suuuper busy with all of his goals, so he needed to be focused. He was the type that presented as if he had it all figured out, while he questioned my ambition. The reality was, we just had different goals. But somewhere between my mid twenties and early thirties I fully accepted that I wasn’t going to be everyone’s cup of tea, which allowed me to stay grounded and not take negative things men said to me seriously. It was usually them, and not me. I’m not claiming to be perfect, but I stand by that assessment. I also didn’t try to change anyone’s mind, so when our communication gradually faded, it was all good. 

At first, the birthday messages made sense, right?  We were cool, there were no hard feelings. So the first time I got a text after all communication completely stopped I responded “wow, I can’t believe you remembered, thank you”. The following year, “thank you!!!” But in 2018 I decided, I wasn’t going to respond anymore messages, to send the message, MOVE ON. But he continued, he sent birthday texts year after year, to no response. I was slightly amused, but more so confused. Like, what was the reason!?!  We weren’t friends. I’ll never know what his motivations were, but for the first time in seven years the birthday texts finally stopped. I think he’s finally got the hint and moved on, good for him.