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madewithonerib · 13 days ago

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If you read this article below, which was the second last thing I read a few hours ago, you'll see that the very questions that these male supermodels have about their identity is the very same crisis we all go through in life. It is not a joke, it seems existential in reality because when we are gripped with fear of the future, we need to know why and for what compelling purpose we are doing anything. Especially at a time when it is all hitting the fan, like a pile of dominoes cascading down, in rapid succession.

You will not know which way is up.

The Afterlife of a Male Model

It’s March 2016 and Tony Ward, the world’s most famous male model who isn’t Fabio, is thrashing around the choppy aquamarine pool of a rented Palm Springs desert home, trying his best not to drown. It’s golden hour, and though the sun has dipped behind the deep purple silhouette of the city’s highest mountain, its departure has done nothing to abate the inferno-level heat, an annoyance that has kept Ward in the pool for the better part of an hour.

There’s a woman on his back — actress Paz de la Huerta from Enter the Void and Boardwalk Empire — and she’s climbing on top of him, pushing him down into the water as she vies to thrill the photographer I’ve brought along for the ride. We’re here to profile him — a superstar experiencing the pedestrian inconvenience of a midlife crisis — but so far, we’ve gotten more antics than interviews. Earlier, he took a fistful of mushrooms, and he and de la Huerta plastered each other’s bodies with acrid-smelling acrylic paint, a homegrown ritual intended as a psychic funeral for her injured body and his so-called “tumultuous half-life living crisis.” Their relationship to each other — unclear at first — quickly cements when they start kissing in the pool: They’re lovers, hungry to feed off each other’s pain.

At 57, Ward is only about 13 percent less ripped than he was in the 1990s when he became one of the first and best-known male supermodels. He’s covered in hasty tattoos, has a face that’s older than it wants to be, and at the time of our meeting four years ago, was in the midst of divorcing a woman who refused to have sex with him unless it was over Skype. He’s got four children spread across two continents and a couple more ex-wives who he takes care of when he can, and while he still models from time to time, it’s safe to say that business isn’t what it used to be. He’s selling talisman jewelry and T-shirts to feed his family in between shoots, and he’s not entirely convinced he wants to be used as an “object to sell clothing” anymore. So, four years ago when all this was coming to a head, he did what any reasonable man on the precipice of a modeling afterlife would do: High-tail it to the desert to party and sort things out in the morning.

Impressed with his “pizazz,” Castro introduced him to legendary fashion photographer Herb Ritts, who fell in love with his singular look and launched him into superstardom as one of the premier male models of the 20th century. For years, he graced the glossy covers and full-bleed spreads of magazines like GQ and Vogue, posing for brands like Calvin Klein, Chanel, Diesel, Fendi, H&M, Hugo Boss and Dolce & Gabbana, the latter for whom he produced a highly controversial campaign. In it, a black-and-while Ward vice-grips the delicate skin of Linda Evangelista’s face as she turns away from him in an exaggerated pose, half-excited and half-disgusted — a masochistic, assaultive stance which somehow, I’m told, sold a lot of D&G pants. (Lest anyone thinks the photo was real and not staged, Ward assures me that Evangelista was “dripping with excitement” during the shoot.) The image was later banned by The Vatican, much to his delight.

His slow bloom into stardom was turbo-charged in the early 1990s when he met, then subsequently dated, Madonna (the two fell in love after she extinguished a lit cigarette on the skin of his back). He became the leading man in some of her most iconic music videos — “Justify My Love,” “Erotica” and “Cherish,” to name a few — and even showed up in her controversial 1992 book SEX with his nose buried snuggly in between the cheeks of her sacred ass.

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Madonna | Justify My Love (Official Video) [HD]

Making out with a paint-covered actress in a pool is one way to wind down a decades-long modeling career, but as Bruce Hulse, another legendary male model and author of Sex, Love and Fashion: A Memoir of a Male Model explains, it’s hardly the only one. “Good looks don’t last forever, and we all know it,” he says. “Pretty much everyone of us knows a handful of guys who went from being big stars one day to not being able to book a job the next.

So, the question we’d always ask each other on set was, ‘Hey dude, what are you going to do when this gravy train’s over? What’s next after modeling?’”

It’s a valid question in an industry where looks are everything and your career lasts an average of only five or six years. But for male models — who often make up to 75 percent less than their female counterparts — that question holds a different weight.

Without the lucrative cash flow and more bountiful opportunities women have, the pressure can be even greater on men to pick up another skill or invest in education and training for a separate, oftentimes far more humble career.

“You can’t take care of a family and your responsibilities in life with [redacted] photographs,” Ward says, this time over a blurry, present-day FaceTime call from a Santa Monica beach. “You might want to find something else to get into.”

As ex-model Edward Siddons explains in an article for Newsweek, male models are often also subject to the same level of sexual harassment, body dysmorphia and rejection female models are. But they usually aren’t taken seriously when they bring it up. And just as is true in the non-modeling world, many of them are subject to the same, restrictive aphorism everyday men are when they speak up about the emotional and physical challenges they face: “Man up.”

That’s another dividing line between male and female models. In Ward’s experience, female models are, like most women, more likely to seek therapy and have the sort of social support to process the things that happen to them during the course of their careers. Men, on the other hand, tend to “bottle things up or put a drug Band-Aid on it.” When they leave the industry, he says, they often “crash and burn.” “This whole industry is a mind-fuck because people only like you externally,” he says. “That’s the purpose of your presence in any given situation. When you lose that after putting so much effort into how you look, you really have to go through some therapy to release all that. Most guys don’t really do that.”

So then, when their modeling careers die down and it’s time for something else, what do they do?

Hulse, who’s still going at it after 40 years, has seen many men exit the industry, some more gracefully than others. “Guys do all kinds of things after they quit modeling,” he says. “I know a lot who went on to open restaurants, start agencies or become photographers (like me).” He also has three friends who became stunt coordinators, a few who are big-time real estate agents and a couple who went to law or medical school. Hulse’s friend and fellow model John Pearson went into media and started a men’s lifestyle publication called Mr. Feelgood, a product of what he calls a “working-class man thing.”

“I always, always, always had something else going on throughout my modeling career,” Pearson says. “It’s a masculine thing, to need to be able to provide, so I’ve done things like write, clean windows and work in restaurants to make sure I could take care of myself and my family.”

Then, of course, there are the guys who move to Costa Rica and start yoga retreats. Actually, if there’s anything male ex-models have in common in their afterlives, Hulse says it’s a preternatural inclination toward spirituality and esoteric interests whose teachings and practices directly counteract the superficial, unpredictable nature of the fashion world. Whether it’s through yoga, meditation or some sort of silent, macrobiotic self-awareness retreat where they come face-to-face with their inner child, they seem to be on some sort of constant, Zoolander-esque inner quest to “find themselves” — a pursuit made possible by generous paychecks and exposure to different cultures through non-stop travel.

“It’s an unusual thing,” Hulse says. “You’re in this industry where everybody’s good-looking. They’ve been handpicked from around the world, like racehorses. That’s their ‘thing,’ and that’s just the business. A lot of models look at that and say, ‘Okay, but what else is there?’ You just reach this point where you’re sitting in these wild clothes in the hot sun on some beach in the Canary Islands, asking yourself what it all means.”

Caught off Guard

Hulse, a Cornell Buddhist Studies major, was able to deduce some meaning and purpose through photography, meditation, fatherhood and the domestic bliss of a rare, 26-year-long marriage. But other ex-models, like 34-year-old Oregon native Terron Wood, find theirs in less expected places… places like the Cheesecake Factory.

From 2007 to 2014, Wood enjoyed a long reign as one of the biggest male models in the world. As the face of Polo and a darling of photographer Bruce Weber (who he and number of other models later sued for sexual harassment related to his infamous “breathing exercises”), he worked his way up to a six-figure salary and jet-setting lifestyle, flitting between catwalks and exotic countries with plenty of bare-chested photoshoots with supermodels like Miranda Kerr in-between.

As a formerly overweight kid who came from humble beginnings in the small town of Gladstone, Oregon, it felt like a near-constant ride in the world’s most thrilling theme park, and everything was peachy.

That is, until he fell in love. “I’d been avoiding dating to focus on my career, but I fell head over heels for this one girl,” he says. “She kind of took the place of all the work I was doing, and I put all my energy into her.” Unfortunately, it didn’t last — they broke up after 18 months. “I was absolutely devastated and crushed,” he says. “It broke my heart.”

It also broke his hot streak at work. After his breakup, Wood spiraled into a numb species of depression that made him incapable of doing much more than smoke copious amounts of weed and order takeout to his apartment. He’d show up to set, despondent and mute, and barely get through the shoot before dragging himself home to toke up before bed. To make matters worse, he was living in a model house with a number of bright-eyed, fresh-faced younger models whose boundless energy and enthusiasm looked a lot more appetizing to agents and photographers than his deteriorating mental state. “I began to sense that my time had passed,” he says. “It was really unhealthy for me to be around them.”

His experience with Weber began to wear on him, too. Modeling is often about pleasing people, and he wondered if the privileged position his job put him in had interfered with his ability to say no. He started to lose sight of who he was, trying on different hats like “Reiki master,” “yoga teacher” and “actor” before realizing none of his attempts to supplement his deflating modeling career weren't sticking. Instead, he let his considerable savings dwindle until his bills piled up, unopened and avoided, the final nail in the coffin of what would become a weeks-long, mania-tinged mental breakdown.

In 2014, he took a trip back home to Oregon to ground himself and clear his mind. Days turned into weeks, and then into months, and eventually, it hit him — he wasn’t going back to New York, and he wasn’t going back to modeling. It was time for something new.

The problem was, he had no idea what that “something” could be. He’d been in fashion since he was 18, and like many other models who exit the game without a solid Plan B, he had no money or other skills to show for it.

The prospect of starting over — not just in his career, but as aperson— was daunting. “I didn’t know what to do with my life,” he says. “I couldn’t just go out and get a job.” He couldn’t ask his friends for help, either. Being away for so long — in an industry where he was constantly on the move — had made it hard to relate to everyday people. The constant flattery and objectification had left him skeptical about what they wanted from him, and he struggled with how to communicate his needs.

“You’re not socialized correctly when you’re a model,” he explains. “You’re always being fawned over. You walk into the room and people are like, ‘Oh, he’s here! How amazing! We’ve been waiting for you!’ They sit you down in a chair and put makeup on you and tell you how pretty you are for hours. Then you’re flown off to another shoot in some exotic location — which you leave the next day — and the cycle just continues. It’s not exactly the best set-up for social success later on.”

Hulse agrees, explaining that because models are used to constant change, they tend to have trouble with relationships. Their entire pace of life is dictated by what’s next — there’s rarely time to stop, slow down and put down roots.

It didn’t help that the few people Wood was close with seemed to subscribe to the belief that male models were, as Josh Sims of the men’s lifestyle and fashion blog FashionBeans puts it, “[smacking] of unappealing traits [like] narcissism, unintelligence and a lack of seriousness.” Their taunts of “Hey, model boy” felt demeaning, and he resented the sardonic tone in their voices when they’d jokingly introduce him at bars and parties as the “handsomest man in Oregon.”

His dad, an interior house painter, offered to help with a job. The two of them spent a couple of years painting houses together, a task for which the old man rewarded him with a cool $100 a day. It was exhausting, erratic work that “sucked” and “was terrible,” but he kept at it — at least he was learning a trade. “I really had to eat humble pie for a while,” he says. “I was used to showing up on set, taking one picture and walking out with $5,000. And instead, I was showing up and busting my ass for eight hours, working for my own dad, getting paint all over me, being tired and hurting my back for $100 a day. But that’s what work is. I had to get used to it.”

For a time, therapy and meditation were his only escapes. Four years in, he decided to put a stop to his routine. He was a social person who’d always enjoyed working in restaurants before he started modeling, so he applied to the only place he could think of that felt like it really fit him — the Cheesecake Factory in Portland.

“I found joy in real-life interactions with people and having to create true connections,” he says, explaining that his Cheesecake Factory co-workers have become somewhat of an extended family to him. “Once I started to fit in there, I let go of that old way of how I felt about things and how entitled I was. I realized that the people I made friends with didn’t actually want anything from me. It totally took away my ego, and I was able to retrain myself in the art of relationships and communication. It really did take me working as a server there to learn how to do these things again.”

Wood works full-time at the Cheesecake Factory now, and says he’s never been happier. He makes good money — $300 a night, even during the pandemic — and says the most exciting thing for him, even after a life of adventure and luxury, is relishing in the little moments that make life worth living. It’s the feeling of presence, of having come full circle.

No Sense of Identity

Back in the pool in Palm Springs, Ward has to come down before he comes full circle. I can tell he’s peaking as de la Huerta paws at him, calling his name in pouty coos as she shoves him underwater in order to launch herself skyward from his shoulders while he plays life raft, limply, below. At times, she drags him underwater for what seems like hours, holding him there as she poses for the camera.

He doesn’t try to fight it.

“You can do anything you want to me,” Ward tells me later. “As long as people want to pay me ridiculous amounts of money to photograph me — which is so stupid — I’m down. But I get lost in there. I’m not exactly sure what I’m supposed to think of myself.”

After all, a vast majority of his life is spent taking on whatever identity the photographer or director tells him to have — angry boyfriend, sultry romance guy, tender beach babe who sells shirts by being shirtless. The public has also given him an identity — cigarette-smoking bad-boy, jet-setting sex god a la Pirates of the Caribbean-era Johnny Depp. “I don’t actually feel like I have an identity,” he laughs from the pool, coughing chlorine out of his lungs as small rivers of paint ooze off his skin into the water.

A lot of models don’t, he tells me. The tension between chameleonic people-pleasing and trying to parse out who they are is real, and there are few times in which that friction is stronger than at the end of their career, when the reflection staring back at them in the mirror changes from somebody to, well, anybody.

For Hulse, however, that moment is still to come.

Having modeled for longer than you’ve been alive, he’s seen thousands of men enter and exit the industry, with only a few well-anchored, long-haul guys like himself refusing to give up their seat at the table. Nevertheless, he, like any smart model, has spent years preparing for his modeling afterlife, honing in on passions like photography and chasing side-careers in anticipation for the day the phone stops ringing. “Right after my first modeling job, I picked up a camera,” he says. “I started taking pictures, doing model tests, doing headshots. That eventually led to a private agent, and now I’m an official photographer. Me and another male model also managed a group of male model UFC fighters for a time. You’ve always got to be looking for a side hustle so you’re not just sitting around waiting for the phone to ring.”

His phone continues to buzz, but he still considers himself to be in the sunset phase of his career, on the precipice of an afterlife that’s just beginning. He’s been happily married for 26 years, and says his biggest joy has been raising his kids with his wife and being part of his local community. “After my days of getting on plane after plane, I can’t tell you how many hotel rooms I woke up in and had no idea where I was, how I got there and where I was going to next,” he says. “I don’t miss those days. I was always like a kid from Philly that used to go down to the shore in summertime and surf with my buddies. And that’s who I am. I’m happiest in my home with my friends going down to the beach. The jet-setting lifestyle isn’t all that it’s made out to be.”

That doesn’t mean it’s easy to give up, though. Toweling himself off and taking a swig of his fifth or sixth Stella of the evening, Ward pauses, turns to me, and admits he wishes things were still the way they were back when he was Madonna’s plaything, when everyday was another photoshoot, another adventure. But then, in a moment of sober clarity, he reconciles it in his mind in real time.

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Sia | I'm Still Here (JOKER)

“This will pass,” he says. “All the good shit, all the bad shit, everything changes. Whatever I’m feeling right now, I know that it’s going to go away. Sometimes it’s deep and it hurts. It’s debilitating, you feel like you don’t want to wake up in the morning or do anything ever again. I think I’ve been depressed a couple of times in my life, pretty hard depressed, but I just don’t let that get me. Every time I feel like giving up, I literally just tell myself to shut up. That’s how I survive.”

So far, he has.

When I catch up with him over the summer, he’s grounded and about 103 percent more content with life than he was in 2016. His family is happy, he’s working on a number of film projects with his friends and just letting life happen. “I’m really grateful for what I have,” he says. “I’m here, I’ve got my family, I’m out on a beach breathing this beautiful ocean air — really, what’s better than that?”

Isabelle Kohn is a sex and relationships journalist, educator and consultant who, for some reason, keeps writing about livestock instead. She writes features and long-form pieces for MEL, usually without the help of Clippy.

#Race Horse #esoteric #high stakes #mental instability #crushed #despondent #The Dresser #the end #reflection #who am i?#Youtube

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universalcovers · 4 months ago

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Source: Britannica

Issey Miyake (born April 22, 1938, Hiroshima, Japan—died August 5, 2022, Tokyo) was a Japanese fashion designer who was known for combining Eastern and Western elements in his work. He also had a popular line of fragrances that included L’Eau d’Issey.

Miyake studied graphic design at Tokyo’s Tama Art University, and after graduation he moved in 1965 to Paris, where he enrolled at the renowned tailoring and dressmaking school École de la Chambre Syndicale de la Couture Parisienne. He began his career in 1966, working behind the scenes for four years in ateliers operated by a trio of 20th-century fashion legends—French couturiers Guy Laroche and Hubert de Givenchy as well as the meticulous American designer Geoffrey Beene. In 1973, three years after he established a Tokyo studio, Miyake displayed his own independent collection in a Paris group fashion show and developed the layered and wrapped look that became his trademark.

Soon the New York department store Bloomingdale’s devoted a section to selling Miyake’s “East meets West” look—mostly T-shirts dyed with Japanese tattoo designs as well as coats featuring the sashiko technique, a Japanese embroidery that strengthens fabric and was typically incorporated into labourers’ clothing. Miyake became an internationally recognized name in the 1980s together with Japanese designers Rei Kawakubo and Yohji Yamamoto, who presented their avant-garde creations alongside his fresh, boldly coloured work during the Paris ready-to-wear collections. His creations often drew comparisons to origami, and pleats became such an integral feature that some called him the “King of Pleats.” However, one of Miyake’s simplest creations, a black mock turtleneck, became perhaps his most recognizable garment after Apple cofounder Steve Jobs made it a signature element of his uniform.

In 2005 the Japan Arts Association awarded Miyake a Praemium Imperiale for outstanding achievement in the arts. In 2006 he became the first fashion designer to receive the Kyoto Prize in Arts and Philosophy for lifetime achievement, awarded by the Inamori Foundation in Japan; the prize included a diploma, a 20-karat-gold prize medal, and 50 million yen (about $446,000). The organization singled out as seminal the clothing line Miyake developed in 1993 called Pleats Please, which “allows unrestricted body movement while enabling the fabric to maintain its form,” and A-POC (“A Piece of Cloth”), which was made from a single thread with the aid of an industrial knitting or weaving machine programmed by a computer. Miyake had begun experimenting on A-POC more than 10 years earlier with textile expert Dai Fujiwara before launching it commercially in 1999. Insisting that A-POC was an ensemble piece, he refused to imprint his name on that collection. He sold it simply as a long tube of jersey, and it was then up to the customer to cut and shape it.

In addition to his clothing, Issey Miyake was known for his collection of perfumes and colognes. L’Eau d’Issey was launched in 1992 and became an international best seller. The light scent, which was inspired by water, was hugely influential, helping to popularize oceanic perfumes. Two years later Miyake debuted a men’s version, and other fragrances followed.

In 2016 the National Art Center in Tokyo staged the most comprehensive exhibition of Miyake’s career.

Rest in peace to one of the greatest

#artist

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tkvkfanfics · 10 months ago

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𝐋𝐎𝐕𝐄 𝐈𝐍 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐋𝐈𝐌𝐄𝐋𝐈𝐆𝐇𝐓

!!! CHAPTER 2

ꜱᴜᴍᴍᴀʀʏ ↝ Taehyung was painfully aware of the truth; life was never free. Every decision he made had a consequence, and it seemed clear what price he would have to pay if someone got to know about the true character of his and Jungkook's relationship. However, he had come this far and there was no turning back or throwing it away. Sadly, he wasn't too brave either.

↝ Taehyung's and Jungkook's relationship right under the nose of obviousness.

ᴘᴀɪʀɪɴɢꜱ ↝ taekook, idol⥏ taehyung x idol⥏ jungkook ↝ idol⥏ taehyung x original male character ↝ straight namjoon ↝ namjin, idol⥏ namjoon x idol⥏ seokjin ↝ idol⥏ seokjin x original male character

ʀᴀᴛɪɴɢ ⥏ ᴡᴀʀɴɪɴɢ ↝ mature 18+ ↝ angst, homophobia, explicit sexual content, self-realisation

ᴛᴀɢꜱ ⥏ ɢᴇɴʀᴇ ↝ secret relationship, slow-burn, awkward first times, awkward romance, complicated friendships, taehyung forgets he should play a detective, ↝ idolsAU, BTS 2016

ꜱᴏᴜɴᴅᴛʀᴀᴄᴋ

ᴡᴀʟʟꜱ ʙᴇᴛᴡᴇᴇɴ ᴜꜱ

There wasn’t something Taehyung found more challenging but enjoyable at the same time than being an idol. He liked the silly photos Jin took and Hoseok later uploaded under their group profile on social media. He couldn’t stop the smile stretching on his lips while his finger was all red and felt dry scrolling up and down the comments spreading over the screen of his phone. Yet, they usually spent hours if not days trying to decide which photo from Hoseok’s wide collection, stuck in one folder of his gallery, would be the most suitable to see behind the borders of his camera roll. Whenever he recalled the burst of laughter from his friend, spilling the bits of the unchewed pork belly onto his hoodie, when he shared how their managers leaned over Hoseok's phone, busy debating which selfie the best presented their sharp chins and in which they seemed to be cross eyeing, it still drew the same confusion over his face.

“Taehyung-ah, I don’t understand your jokes, but your serious face can always make me lose it,” laughed his friend while he was wiping off the tears gathered around his eyes and streaming down his red, puffy cheeks filled with fatty food.

However, Taehyung wasn’t joking.

If there were five photos, each one sending an individual notification to their fan’s devices, displaying their faces among the lovely messages their staff usually left on their way to take the chaos of the shared profile in their hands, there were tens of videos, recorded on the more professional camera than their low-quality phones, zooming in on the synchronized choreography their legs, torsos and arms were attempting to sell.

Taehyung eyed the tripod standing at its usual place in the corner of the dance studio where it wouldn’t be visible behind their backs reflecting in the wall mirrors. He wore his most comfortable clothes, long and wide enough so when would be jumping, the hem of his T-shirt wouldn't reveal the skin of his belly. Their managers referred to it as an unnecessary distraction, but if it was true why did they dress Jimin into a sweater so loose around the collar that it exposed the full expanse of his light cutting collarbones even if he was just putting a foot in front of a foot?

“Hey, still stretching?” Jungkook returned with the refilled bottle handing it to Taehyung while sitting crossed-legged, leaning the small of his back against the bag conveniently thrown in the middle of the studio. Taehyung noticed how it wobbled, fearing to trip over, trying to endure the weight of Jungkook’s muscles. But it seemed Jungkook either didn’t notice or simply didn’t care, even wiggling to make himself more comfortable against whatever the fabric and zipper were hiding.

“Thanks,” smiled Taehyung, grateful he no longer had to pretend to be trying to touch his toes when all that shook his body were his huffs and sighs. He grabbed the plastic bottle from Jungkook’s hands, careful to not drop it as it felt slippery from the cold water still grazing along its surface. And instead of complaining, he pulled up the leg of his sweatpants until the tight cuffs weren’t stopped by his knee and he pressed the dripping but chilly bottle against his sore aching calf, moaning in relief.

“When are we starting?’ he turned back to Jungkook, finding him with his left arm bent high over his head, massaging his right shoulder, ‘If now, maybe I can still convince my legs to behave.”

He heard Jungkook snicker and when tilted his head, his nose was already scrunched, like always when he found something amusing enough.

“I don’t know, we are still waiting for Jin hyung,” Jungkook shrugged and pursed his lips.

But instead of returning to bore his fingers into his own tensed muscles, he grabbed Taehyung around the waist and pulled him closer until their hips were touching. Taehyung jerked, not clear if from surprise or pain, as the heel of Jungkook’s broad palm started to gently move in circles over his crying calf.

“I thought he was already on his way?” Taehyung pouted only to shiver in a discomfort boarding an agony, Jungkook was using his knuckles now. “Wasn’t Yoongi hyung trying to call him?”

“Yeah, but I don’t think hyung answered his phone,” Jungkook replied and his gaze got lost among the other members until he didn’t find Yoongi’s squatting figure in the danger of Hoseok’s powerful and Namjoon’s clumsy dancing.

Yoongi’s frown was visible in the shine of his phone screen, stuck close to his nose while his eyes were running frantically across some text he was reading. It appeared the more he read, the more stress he added on the poor eyebrows almost touching in a perfect V in the middle of his face.

“Why won’t Namjoon hyung text him? He is the only one to whom he listens,” Jungkook voiced out his thoughts, shaking his head in disappointment. Taehyung didn’t know if he was mad at Jin for being late again or upset over Namjoon’s these days lacking leader behaviour. But if looked at it logically, it would probably be the latter one, as Jungkook became a bit selfish ever since they started dating and after he learned about Jin’s relationship. He purposely looked over what he would find damaging to their career the other day, possibly in the hope of Jin’s supporting hand if he and Taehyung ever got into trouble.

Taehyung wasn’t sure if Jungkook was expecting an answer from him but he was saved by the thunderous crash shaking the entire room, as the door was slammed open against the wall behind them. They didn’t even have a chance to creak in a protest when Jin’s cry of “Sorry” got everyone’s attention again.

Not understanding what he was expecting if he swung open the door like that all while being late almost for half an hour, Taehyung wasn’t impressed by the blush climbing up high his neck or his awkward cough when he noticed all eyes on him. Jungkook, next to him, pushed a tongue against his cheek but averted his gaze.

It seemed the powerful thud of door, imprinting the shape of the handle into the wall, frost not only everything they were doing but also the time itself. A whole ten seconds had to pass until the breath didn't push out of Taehyung’s lungs and Yoongi threw a scoff with a middle finger towards Jin stomping a step inside the room.

“At least…” murmured Yoongi with a clear annoyance, ignoring Hoseok, biting down a laugh behind him. But only when Yoongi disappeared in the shadows of lockers in the far corner, busying himself with shoelaces, he reached out to hit Jin’s shoulder. “Well, well,’ Hoseok snorted, ‘look who decided to join us, fashionably late!”

Hoseok wasn’t the only one who chose to approach the situation with support covered behind the merciless teasing. Jimin also stood up from his place in front of the mirror where he was tugging at the frizzy fabric, pulling out from the stitches the skin-irritating fuzz or ‘stretching his sweater until it didn’t reveal his whole upper chest,’ thought Taehyung, if he wanted to copy his friend’s pettiness.

“Yeah, hyung,’ he stopped a foot away from Jin’s mud-bringing-in boots, ‘you look like you've had quite a morning,” Jimin abruptly cut himself off and Taehyung saw why. He followed the path of Jimin’s eyes, starting from the hem of his pants showed the logo of his white socks, printed on the very top where they were pressing under his calves, and stopping on the mark the sauce, he spilt over himself during yesterday’s lunch, left, seeping into the material as a stain on his shirt, “Or maybe the night?”

There was no mystery to Taehyung whose were the trousers, too tight over his tights, or that he pulled yesterday’s shirt over his head after he woke up, not even bothering to button it up his neck, probably too much in a hurry.

“Did you lose track of time?” while Hoseok’s question was dancing around the line of innocence, once Jimin’s mouth opened up again, it was clear what he was implying, despite his batting eyelashes, “Or were you just too busy to remember practice, hyung?"

“Guys,” Jin tried to stop the chaos with a gesture, pushing Jimin away from his back. Only, Jimin seemed to be too close for comfort. His short arms wrapped over Jin’s elbows so that he couldn’t move freely and his head was resting on Jin’s shoulder. Taehyung was hit with a sudden pang of longing as he recalled how it felt when Jimin's pointy chin was pressing against him, seemingly wanting to make a hole or turn his bones into dust. He rather turned away from the scene, before a gush of an aching jealousy didn’t possess him and he made something stupid, like elbowed Jin in the ribs and wiggled into Jimin’s arms to feel the hard bones on his jaw pressing against his body. He stared at Jungkook’s hand instead, still massaging his calf softly, and another wave of guilt washed over him. If Jimin was mad because he had left their hotel room as soon as his dreams painted over his sleep that night, to possibly not return back, if things didn’t go as planned, would he stab a knife into Taehyung’s heart if he got to know about Jungkook and him?

Secrets, secrets… And Taehyung really thought he was doing better this year.

He almost missed Hoseok, interrupting the teasing fight between Jin and Jimin, “Oh hyung, is that a hickey?” and Yoongi’s angry grunt followed by the thudding steps on the floor, ‘You’ve got to be kidding me! Are you out of your mind?”

“What? Lemme se- Oh! It definitely looks like one!”

“Someone had a steamy night, huh?”

“Hyung, are you seeing someone?”

Everybody's chatter and Yoongi’s furious curses flew, ignored, over Taehyung's head, as he became suddenly hyper-aware of not only the fingers writing on his bare skin but also of how close Jungkook and him were sitting. Their bodies were barely apart, no air could have pushed between them.

Reading the panic screaming in his eyes, Jungkook pulled away and where the comforting warmth was spreading over his calf, there suddenly was cold, prompting his leg hair to stand up. Taehyung leaned forward, bending his knee, he dragged the fabric of his sweatpants down until the hem wasn’t touching his sock, covering the area where Jungkook’s palm had found its place as if its shape was about to rise pink and revealing on his skin. He only allowed himself a peek when another bang fell on his ears, it was more like a reflex.

“Yah, Jungkook-ah, you alright?”

The loud sound of the crash made everyone look towards them, blinking at Jungkook who had fallen backwards, over the bag he was leaning against. It now disappeared beneath his body, appearing only as an uncomfortably looking swell pushing his stomach up.

Yet all Taehyung could see was a pair of squinting eyes set on his face, with eyebrows pulled high and disappearing behind the short-trimmed fridge. Embarrassed and feeling guilty, Taehyung got up quickly and joined Yoongi, practising in his far corner, while trying to ignore Namjoon's intense gaze fixed on him.

დ

Jin closed the door of his and Yoongi’s shared room with an obvious slam, as if he wanted to put an exclamation mark behind the ‘I am staying home tonight’ statement but not before meeting Taehyung’s eyes watching him from the sofa backrest.

Taehyung couldn’t tell what noise hurt his head more, the picture frames hitting the walls after they jumped from the compression wave or the clang of dishes, forcefully placed on the rubber mat next to the sink, where they continued to move against each other from the dripping wetness, as Yoongi continued to wash the remains of their late dinner with hot water and soap.

“You can cut through the tension,’ sighed Taehyung and plopped back down onto the soft cushions of their brand new sofa, ‘only Namjoon hyung is missing here.” He could feel himself sliding down the slippery leather, but it was his naked heels that took all the discomfort as they rubbed against the rough carpet.

“If you continue to do this, you will fall down,” warned him Jungkook after he pushed close the disc tray of their DVD player and turned around, noting his ass practically hovering over the nothing and the floor.

Taehyung only shrugged, but he put his arms behind himself. Yet, the softness into which they sank didn’t help his quivering muscles and they gave up soon after under his weight. His bottom touched the rug with an audible thud, scaring Yoongi who threw a rug after him. Taehyung watched it flying above his head and landing on his outstretched toes. It prompted a laugh out of him and he looked up to meet Jungkook’s eyes and the familiar nose scrunch, but he was already bending down and lifting Taehyung’s slopped down body.

“What’s up with you?” he asked him simply as his hands slipped past the gap between his torso and arms.

It felt as if a magnet was searching for its opposite pole under his skin and once it found it, he was pulled towards it. Taehyung’s head fell on Jungkook’s shoulder while the spinning circle was loading a movie on the grey background of the screen. Jungkook nuzzled into the strands of his hair, breathing in the smell of his shampoo. Taehyung didn’t normally enjoy being controlled like a rag doll, but this was different. Letting himself be drifted away in Jungkook’s arms didn’t feel that bad.

The moment was broken soon after by a distant sound, as Yoongi turned off the faucet and the water bubbled inside the pipes.

“Hm?” Jungkook's eyes widened with confusion when Taehyung blindly patted the sofa armrest and pulled away, leaving enough space between his legs and Jungkook's hips for another person.

“Noth-” he shook his head quickly before turning to face the television screen where the opening credits began to roll above a romantic sunset falling over the city skyline. The confusion in Jungkook's expression never faded. “I wanted to tell you something this morning,” Taehyung faced him again, looking at the boy with determination behind his shaking hands.

Jungkook blinked once and then again. “Oh, sure,’ he leaned forward, putting pressure on his toes to support himself while he reached for the remote control, dangerously close to the edge of the coffee table, ‘What is it, Tae hyung?” he asked, pointing the wide part of the plastic device towards the yellow control, gleaming in the left bottom corner of the television. And just before the screen turned black again, Taehyung cut in with panic, jerking his head backwards and mumbling, “Yoongi hyung,” behind his shoulder.

Jungkook tilted his head and glanced at him curiously, then, the remote fell back among the couch cushions.

“I think…,’ Taehyung’s voice trembled as his gaze remained glued to Ji Sung, appearing under a dramatic light in a foreign apartment wearing a motorbike leather jacket, portraying the role of Cha Dohyun - a businessman with multiple personality disorder - taking over where the last week’s episode left off, ‘I think that Namjoon hyung,’ Cha Dohyun put his head into his palms, noticing the blood smeared over his fingers, ‘might know about us.”

But any sort of reaction from Cha Dohyun was blocked out by Jungkook's figure stepping in front of him.

Taehyung watched how the lazy carefreeness slowly started to fade from Jungkook’s smile until his facial muscles didn’t lock in a panic.

“What?” Jungkook had to bite on his lip, but a shout still roared over the voices coming from the television and a low scoff was heard coming from the kitchen. “What?’ he repeated quietly, ‘How do you know?”

“I-”

“No, wait.” Suddenly, a hand pressed against his lips and Jungkook’s eyes flickered between both him and the shadows coming from Yoongi’s back moving in the kitchen. Then, he clutched the remote, however instead of turning off the drama, he turned up the volume. Instantly, Cha Dohyun's voice could be heard louder than Taehyung's own heart thumping inside his ears.

“Did you tell him? Did Jin hyung say something?” Jungkook’s eyes were big again, running over Taehyung’s face and searching for the answers.

“No! Why would I?’ Taehyung argued back, pushing the hand from his mouth away, ‘I don’t think hyung would…”

“Then how?”

Taehyung leaned close until his mouth didn’t line up with Jungkook’s ear, and he whispered as if Cha Dohyun’s dramatic monologue wasn’t yelling all over their apartment, “You fell asleep in my bed last night,” he remained him softly, but Jungkook’s lips just opened into a voiceless ‘And?’.

“And today,’ Taehyung’s hand shot in the air to scratch the back of his head to bring him comfort, ‘I think Namjoon hyung was watching us while we were warming up in front of the mirror.” He looked down in guilt at his hands placed over his lap, expecting a pale face to appear within his sight, but when a laugh, strained with a hint of relaxation vibrated from Jungkook’s throat, Taehyung snapped his head up. The unexpected laughter left him unsure about Jungkook’s feelings and thoughts.

“Hyung,’ Jungkook’s tensed shoulders fell and he released a sigh of relief, ‘I didn’t notice anything. You are probably reading too much into it.” He bent down and caressed the back of Taehyung’s hands, intertwined together and resting on the stretched fabric of his sweatpants. Taehyung followed his step as he sat back down, grabbing Taehyung’s knee and squeezing his muscles around its sensitive sides.

“I am not sayi-”

“But what if I am not,’ interrupted him Taehyung, too high on his worries. His tone sounded hollow and cold, falling off not only his tongue but also seeping through his skin, rising up until it didn’t hit the barrier of Jungkook’s warm hand. Yet, this time, it didn’t seem like a problem. He felt Jungkook shudder and pull away. “I feel like everyone knows…” Taehyung noticed how his voice trembled and his throat closed up in fear, yet the exasperation stepping as a physical reaction in front of the frustration he was feeling controlled him more. He started to see red around the blurred edges of the situation. Taehyung felt mad, confused and irritated the longer Jungkook kept waving an uncaring hand.

“Would it be so bad?” asked Jungkook all of a sudden, his voice barely heard over the drama playing on the screen while he looked at Taehyung shyly as if sensing his distress.

Yet, the look in Taehyung’s eyes was still wild. “What do you mean?”

“Tae hyung, we talked about this,’ the cautious control with which Jungkook had been approaching Taehyung was instantly gone, changing for the tired sigh, ‘We can’t hide forever. We should just talk to hyung and clear the air.” And Taehyung knew he had to mean it, or else his chin wouldn’t stuck in the air in such a confident gesture. He must have been toying with the idea between his subconsciousness and consciousness for some time now, just like when one played with the cap of a bottle with his fingers, thinking if they should pout themselves another glass.

“Look,’ Jungkook shifted on his place and his hand shook in the air above Taehyung’s leg again, until he didn’t decide against it, ‘I know you are still worried about what others might think of you if you came out, but you told me hyung knows, right?” Maybe Jungkook could read Taehyung better than he gave him credit for because the next thing Taehyung knew, he was listening to yet another argument, “He supports Jin hyung too. Why would this be any different?”

The hot rays of conviction started to melt Taehyung’s concerns until he didn’t remember something else. “Yeah, he supports him for his own selfish reasons,” he scoffed and could almost imagine Namjoon’s awkward laugh and hear Jin’s attempt to mask the serious situation with one of his jokes.

“What?”

“Nothing,’ Taehyung shook his head, only now realising he spoke his thoughts aloud, ‘Jungkook-ah, do you remember what I told you yesterday?” During the few seconds, his stubbornness was back, presenting brand new fears behind the walls it was building with determination. “I'm just scared that if hyung finds out, he'll pressure us to tell the company, just like he is doing with Jin hyung and Hyungu hyung.”

“We can’t-”

Taehyung threw his head back with such power that if there wasn’t another person weighing down the sofa, it would fall over and he would be lying with legs in the air and facing the fuming Yoongi. “Yeah, we can’t hide forever, you have already said that.” His palms slapped the cushions on his sides, marking the first beat of the spreading silence. And when Taehyung’s hands raised to disappear deep between his lifted knees, Jungkook cleared his throat, “So what do you want to do then?”

When Taehyung’s eyes flew to the other man, whose toes were only a bit away from his tight, lying on the couch, the need to apologize ran through him, when he noticed his pout.

“I don’t know,’ shrugged Taehyung, but another idea was already at the tip of his tongue, ‘talk to Jin hyung and Hyungu hyung maybe?”

He thought he heard Jungkook inhale sharply before he asked, “How could they help?”

“I…,’ even if he thought the reason he wanted to meet them was pretty obvious he still struggled to speak his thoughts out loud, ‘They are going through something similar, maybe-”

“Yeah, of course,’ this time he couldn’t mistake a scoff for something else, ‘Of course you would go to him.” Jungkook rolled his eyes.

Taehyung had mistakenly thought Jungkook could see his point.

“Jungkook, please… Not this again,’ he begged him, feeling tired of the old argument, ‘I thought we talked about this,’ his eyes closed before the room in front of him could start to swing as he shook his head, ‘I still don’t understand how can something like this even cross your mind Even now when Jin hyung has a boyfriend-”

“Yeah,’ exclaimed Jungkook, eagerly leaning forward and pointing a finger at himself, ‘and I am your…” he hurried up to speak, however, his mouth stayed hanging open and only hot air changed to cold as his chest heaved up and down as if he'd just run a marathon.

Taehyung nervously chewed his bottom lip and refused to make eye contact. He was trying desperately to focus on the stain on his clothes, anything other than the unspoken truth that he and Jungkook hadn't discussed the status of their relationship yet. He knew that it was a conversation they needed to have, yet neither of them had brought it up in the month that had passed since they have started to... Taehyung wasn't sure if they were dating or not, because all he could remember were their shared kisses and shy touches.

“I just wish,’ as Jungkook mustered up the courage and continued despite the spreading tension, Taehyung felt his heart starting to pound wildly against his chest, ‘we could deal with this together, without running to others for help.”

“But Kookie, this is not something we can do alone.”

“Then let’s come out!” repeated Jungkook, but it wasn’t excitement ruling over his tone, it more reminded of frustration.

“That is-”

“Different, yeah, I heard.” Jungkook's expression grew fierce and intense as he jumped up from his seat, hands running through his hair. His mouth was a thin line of anger and determination while his eyebrows formed an intense knot as the shadow cast by them deepened the lines on his face. He spread his legs, standing tall with an intimidating presence that made Taehyung gulp.

“Are you mad?” he asked timidly.

“No.”

Taehyung blinked. “Would you tell me if you were?”

Jungkook sighed, pressing his tongue against his inner cheek and he glanced over Taehyung's head towards their open kitchen. “Let’s go to sleep, hyung. Yoongi hyung is watching.”

But, as Jungkook got lost in the narrow hallway lined up with doors of their rooms, which Taehyung heard to slam close, and he looked over the backrest, and the saliva of excuses bubbling hot in his mouth, he found the kitchen vacant and the dishes dry and shiny. Yoongi had to leave minutes ago.

Taehyung felt his shoulders tense as he put his head into his palms, struggling to keep back a flood of emotion that threatened to overwhelm him. He desperately tried to recall what had lead to this, the first argument between them coming back in waves.

“You wouldn't love me if you knew all parts of me!” screamed Cha Dohyun brokenly.

“Oh shut up! You are so selfish thinking only about yourself!” spat Taehyung in anger towards the pretty face on the television.

დ

On nights, when Jungkook’s big warm body wasn’t there, lying next to him, to distract him from how the lack of the body in his roommate’s bed made him feel small inside the big room, Taehyung was more aware of how much he missed their tiny place where he could just reach out from his bottom bed and he would find himself under the crazy amount of his best friend’s sheets while pushing his freezing toes against Jimin’s calves.

Jimin and he used to fight a lot. Whose dirty socks are smelling on the floor? Can’t you buy your own shampoo? Just be quiet for once, I can’t concentrate! Every time Jimin stormed with fists clenched alongside his body out of the room or Taehyung shut the door in front of his red face, there was Jungkook’s shoulder to cry out his tears of frustration on, or Jungkook’s chest to punch until the rage didn’t go away. But Jungkook and him had never fought.

During the nights, when Jungkook’s head wasn’t moving up and down with his chest breathing towards the life journey, he felt lonely and restless.

Taehyung grabbed the phone placed next to his hip on the mattress, seeing the annoyance screwing up his facial muscle reflecting on the locked screen before he didn’t press on the button and the colours of his wallpaper eased up his soul.

[12:36 AM] >𝙷𝚎𝚢, 𝙺𝚘𝚘𝚔. 𝙰𝚛𝚎 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚜𝚝𝚒𝚕𝚕 𝚊𝚠𝚊𝚔𝚎?

He pressed the yellow arrow in the left corner of his message and watched how the tiny number one appeared next to his sent text. He didn’t hope for a response and he most likely just imagined the ring coming from behind the wall from the next room.

Taehyung threw his arm over his eyes, finding sleep in the darkness pressing on his eyelids, so when the same tiny number one vanished into the blue background of their chat room, he didn’t see it. However, it was impossible to miss the familiar tone of notification in the empty silence. He almost sent the device flying with his elbow when he hurried to take a look at the new white box under his question.

[12:38 AM] >>𝚈𝚎𝚊𝚑, 𝙸 𝚌𝚊𝚗'𝚝 𝚜𝚕𝚎𝚎𝚙 𝚎𝚒𝚝𝚑𝚎𝚛

Not even a second passed when another message popped up.

[12:38 AM] >>𝚆𝚑𝚊𝚝'𝚜 𝚘𝚗 𝚢𝚘𝚞𝚛 𝚖𝚒𝚗𝚍?

Taehyung smiled and his fingers rested over the keyboard again.

[12:39 AM] >𝙸𝚝'𝚜 𝚓𝚞𝚜𝚝...

He hesitated for a short while before he sent the rest of the message.

[12:39 AM] >𝙸 𝚠𝚒𝚜𝚑 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚠𝚎𝚛𝚎 𝚑𝚎𝚛𝚎 𝚠𝚒𝚝𝚑 𝚖𝚎 𝚛𝚒𝚐𝚑𝚝 𝚗𝚘𝚠.

This time his message went right into read and Taehyung’s heart did a pirouette when he realised it meant Jungkook has also been impatiently awaiting his response.

[12:39 AM] >>𝙸 𝚠𝚒𝚜𝚑 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚜𝚊𝚖𝚎 𝚝𝚑𝚒𝚗𝚐, 𝚃𝚊𝚎

Taehyung pressed his phone over his heart, as if showing it the reason behind its wild beating.

When he looked at the screen again, there was a new message, longer than just a few words.

[12:40 AM] >>𝙱𝚎𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚊𝚙𝚊𝚛𝚝 𝚒𝚜 𝚝𝚘𝚞𝚐𝚑. 𝙴𝚟𝚎𝚗 𝚒𝚏 𝚒𝚝 𝚒𝚜 𝚓𝚞𝚜𝚝 𝚊 𝚠𝚊𝚕𝚕.

Taehyung’s teeth weren’t quick to bite down the laugh parting his lips and vibrating within his throat.

[12:40 AM] >𝚈𝚎𝚊𝚑

Taehyung responded shortly, hovering his finger over the emoticons, but before he could send them, he looked up, pressing the top of his head into his pillow until his neck was no longer sinking into its softness and he eyed the wall of his bed was touching. Taehyung deleted the ugly yellow faces.

[12:40 AM] >𝙲𝚊𝚗 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚕𝚒𝚔e

[12:41 AM] >𝚝𝚘𝚞𝚌𝚑 𝚒𝚝?

He wrote instead and turned around, grazing the mattress under him with his belly. Taehyung pushed his ass back until he didn’t feel stable on his knees, sitting on his heels, he felt the powdery paint under his fingers and palm.

[12:41 AM] >>𝚆𝚑𝚊𝚝?

Asked Jungkook.

[12:41 AM] >𝚃𝚑𝚎 𝚠𝚊𝚕𝚕. 𝙲𝚊𝚗 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚝𝚘𝚞𝚌𝚑 𝚒𝚝?

Taehyung could feel his muscles straining when he pushed against the hard surface, trying to crush it with his strength, but he knew his wrist would break sooner than the first crack would travel between the gaps of his fingers.

His phone went off again.

[12:41 AM] >>𝚆𝚑𝚢?

Jungkook was still trying to understand.

[12:43 AM] >𝙸 𝚊𝚖 𝚝𝚘𝚞𝚌𝚑𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚒𝚝

Taehyung watched how the little number disappeared again but no new message was coming for the next few seconds. He watched how the time written next to it grew old as the minute tickling over his notification bar changed.

But then:

[12:45 AM] >>𝙻𝚒𝚔𝚎 𝚝𝚑𝚒𝚜?

Taehyung’s eyes didn’t even have enough time to put the written words together when a knock resonated through his ear, bumping against his palm and he jumped from the startle.

Taehyung stared at the simple wall built to divide the place into two rooms. He could feel his heart somewhere in his neck now, close to escape if he opened his mouth. He didn’t doubt it would find the narrowest gap and push through until it didn’t crash against Jungkook’s beating chest.

[12:46 AM] >𝙻𝚒𝚔𝚎 𝚝𝚑𝚒𝚜

He knocked back.

#taekook au #taekook #vkook fanfiction #vkook #bts #bts taekook #taekook canon #canon #taekook fluff #taekook angst #taekook smut #kpop idol #idol jungkook #idol taehyung #bottom taehyung #top jungkook

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miniincomestreamsreview · 2 years ago

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The Ultimate Mini Income Streams Review

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Disclaimer:

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#mini income streams #mini income streams review #mini income streams reviews #rachel rofe #rachel rofe mini income streams #make money online #passive income #income #AI Tool #how to make money online #passive income ideas #how to make passive income

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veteran-owned-business · 2 years ago

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4 Small, Veteran-Owned Coffee Companies You Need To Try

Many consumers enjoy coffee, a popular beverage with a long history that spans the globe. For some, a cup of coffee is more than just a pick-me-up in the morning - it's a way of life. Supporting local, veteran-owned coffee businesses is a wonderful way to honor those who have served our country while enjoying a delicious cup of coffee. Here are 4 small, veteran-owned coffee companies you need to try.

Black Rifle Coffee Company

Black Rifle Coffee Company (BRCC), established in 2014 by veteran Evan Hafer, has swiftly gained popularity among coffee drinkers. BRCC is a high-end, small-batch coffee company headquartered in Salt Lake City, Utah, that exclusively imports the best beans from around the world.

Alpha Coffee

Alpha Coffee, a veteran-owned business with headquarters in Utah, takes great pride in providing its clients with single-origin coffee of the finest quality. Former U.S. Army Green Beret Carl Churchill founded Alpha Coffee, intending to establish a coffee business to assist veterans and their families. The business serves as a terrific one-stop shop for your coffee needs because it also sells coffee equipment and accessories.

Fire Dept. Coffee

Luke Schneider and Mark Williams, two firemen, established Fire Dept. Coffee in 2016. The business, with its headquarters in Rockford, Illinois, purchases its beans from small farms worldwide and roasts them on-site. A variety of blends are available from Fire Dept. Coffee, including a famous dark roast and a bourbon-infused coffee.

Invader Coffee

Austin, Texas-based Invader Coffee is a small, veteran-owned coffee business. Invader Coffee, established in 2016 by U.S. Army veterans, provides a variety of premium, in-house, roasted small-batch coffee blends. The business imports its coffee beans from countries worldwide, including Brazil, Colombia, and Ethiopia, to mention a few. Additionally, they sell coffee-related items and accessories, such as mugs, t-shirts, and coffee machines.

In conclusion, these 4 small, veteran-owned companies you need to try not only allow you to enjoy a delicious cup of coffee, but also support those who have served our country. Whether you prefer a light roast or a dark roast, there's a veteran-owned coffee company out there for you. Give these four companies a try and taste the difference for yourself.

#veteran-owned coffee companies you need to try

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lesbianchemicalplant · 2 years ago

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Someone asked me whether I knew Lane Lloyd while I was involved with radfem/TERF subcultures. This person informed me that Lane was selling crafts to queer and trans people while denying past involvement with TERF communities, often using their identity and experience as a trans person to deflect accusations. Lane, under the handle Coyotesnout, promotes their work on Instagram, has an Etsy shop and sells t-shirts through Bonfire. I affirmed that I had known Lane and was willing to share what I know of their past affiliations and actions. Since they are marketing and selling their goods to queer and trans people, I believe people should know their background so they can decide if they want to give Lane their money or associate with them. I know that personally I wouldn’t give money to someone who participated in TERF groups for years with no real sign of change or taking responsibility for past harmful behavior. I’m sure many others would feel similarly.

Lane was involved in my old group, the detransitioned radical feminist community and the lesbian TERF community more broadly. [...] I read and followed some of their old tumblr blogs (including localhorrorlesbian and femalehusband), met them in person on a few occasions and emailed with them a few times. I also heard about some of their activities through Devorah Zahav rather than through direct communication with Lane or observing their actions directly. Some of what I describe will reflect how Devorah perceived Lane and their actions. I’m guessing I first encountered their online presence by 2016, possibly sooner, and met them in person in 2016, when Lane attended the first Blood & Visions retreat.

Blood & Visions was a retreat for detransitioned and desisted women organized at a trans-exclusionary women’s land in Oregon and Lane attended it in 2016, 2017 and 2018, three out of the fours years that it ran. The lead organizer of that event was Devorah Zahav, the main leader of the detransitioned radical feminist community. I also did a fair amount of work helping Devorah plan and put on the gathering. The event was both a chance for detrans and desisted women to hang out together and a place where many of the attendees conducted political strategy and organizing sessions to discuss how best to attack the trans community as a “manifestation of patriarchy”, spread radfem/TERF propaganda and recruit female assigned trans people into the detrans/desisted radfem community. [...]

Among notable attendees at Blood & Visions who Lane knew and interacted with were Max and Kitty Robinson (tumblr blogs weary4u and kittyit respectively), Cari Stella (tumblr blog guideonraginstars), and the women behind the 23xx and hot-flanks tumblr blogs. All such individuals at the very least spread anti-trans propaganda and many engaged in anti-trans activism, sometimes making connections with prominent TERFs, anti-trans parents groups, conversion therapists and others who harm the trans community. Lane certainly never got as connected to influential anti-trans activists and organizations compared to other people I knew but they hung out with such people. Max and Kitty Robinson, for example, have since gone on to make connections with Janice Raymond herself, using that connection to help Max publish an anti-trans book on detransition that claims that transmasculine transition is a “sado-ritual syndrome”, a way that patriarchy attempt to destroy and co-opt women’s power. Raymond cites both Max and Kitty in her most recent anti-trans book Doublethink and thanks them in her acknowledgments. My old group was small but managed to make many connections with powerful transphobes because of how they wanted to use our stories. By participating in the detrans/desisted radical feminist community, Lane was a few steps removed from detrans women who worked with people like 4thWaveNow, Lisa Marchiano, Lisa Littman, Ruth Barrett, Jesse Singal and Janice Raymond.

I once encouraged Lane and others in the detrans/desisted radical feminist community to do whatever they could to spread anti-trans radical feminist ideology. Lane has acted in ways straight out from what I recommended in the workshop I presented at the first Blood & Vision gathering. [...]

According to Devorah, Lane took part in what she would joking refer to as “psy-ops” to push “softer” variations of radical feminist ideology and propaganda into queer and trans online and in-person communities in an attempt to influence and recruit queer cis women and female assigned trans people. Devorah believes that all transmasculinity is a manifestation of unresolved trauma and/or internalized misogyny and so she disapproved of Lane attempting to reconcile trans and butch identity. She also disapproved of Lane eventually getting top surgery to treat their dysphoria, since she believes that the desire to transition can spread like a “social contagion” and that Lane could “infect” others because of their position of influence. At the same time, she was often enthusiastic about many of Lane’s actions which she viewed as spreading radical and lesbian feminist ideology and culture. Devorah despises trans women, so she particularly delighted when Lane targeted trans women in queer and trans communities. I’m sure on some level she must have realized that Lane’s identity as a trans butch helped spread radfem/TERF ideology where it would otherwise have a hard time penetrating but that didn’t stop her from judging Lane and looking down at them as still suffering from “false consciousness”. [lol, lmao]

Many have accused Lane of being a crypto-TERF and I can confirm as someone who was part of the same radical feminist circles they moved in that this was indeed true. I also participated in spreading propaganda aiming to extend the influence of the detrans radical feminist community and recruit more people into it. [...]

Among other things, Lane stirred up hostility towards trans women accused of abuse, not out of a desire to see all abusers held accountable regardless of gender but coming from the transmisogynistic view that trans women are more likely to engage in violence and abuse because on some level they’re “really male” and thus are a danger to “female people” in queer and trans communities. Lane and others in my old community specifically focused on instances where trans women were accused of abuse and violence because it fit their transmisogynistic beliefs and could be used to push (crypto-)TERF propaganda, much like how white supremacists and other fascists use real or imagined instances of violence by people of color to frame all people of color as inherently dangerous and violent. At the same time, abuse by cis women and female-assigned trans people was typically seen as being less serious, leading to instances where abuse within the radfem/TERF community was downplayed, denied or hidden. This further shows that the point wasn’t actually to combat abuse in queer and trans communities but to paint trans women as inherently more dangerous and use it as an excuse to drive them out of those communities, while taking no substantial step to curb abuse by female-assigned people. The end result is that queer and trans communities are less safe for both trans women and survivors of abuse.

Lane also helped spread the idea that all trans men, transmasculine people and other female-assigned trans people are all fundamentally “female” by virtue of being assigned female at birth and then being “female socialized” as a child growing up. This denies the experiences of trans men and other female-assigned trans people who do not consider themselves female in any way and/or find that categorization hurtful or offensive. It implies such people are in denial of what they really are and possibly anti-feminist or suffering from internalized misogyny. It also implies and reinforces the idea that trans women, transfeminine people and other trans people assigned male are “really male” because of their sex assigned at birth and “male socialization”. TERFs and transphobic lesbians have used the idea that trans women are “male” and/or “male socialized” to exclude them from feminist and lesbian spaces/culture and to claim that trans women are more likely to be violent and abusive.

There have been attempts to build subcultures of cis lesbians, transmasculine people and other female-assinged trans people based on a supposed common ground of shared “femaleness”, either “female biology”, “female socialization” or both, while excluding trans women and transfeminine people on the basis that they’re supposedly “male”. This specific construction of “femaleness” is thus grounded in transmisogyny and the belief that assigned sex, gender socialization or a combination of both is defining for life, determining among other things what a person is, who they have connections with and who it makes sense to build community with. It’s a way for radical feminism to attempt to assimilate transmasculine people and other female-assigned trans people, encouraging them to identify and value what traits they supposedly share with cis women, thereby reinforcing a particular construction of “femaleness” that radical feminism is grounded in, while also reinforcing transmisogyny, distrust, rejection and hostility towards trans women. This is often just a stage working towards encouraging transmasculine people to go for full ideologically-motivated detransition/desistance and “female reidentification”. It’s not uncommon for TERFs to pretend to be more accepting of transmasculine people than they actually are in order to get a hook in them and then see how far they can influence them. Transmasculine people like Lane who peddle watered down versions of TERFism are very useful for TERFs, helping them reach people that they would be unable to influence otherwise.

Lane ran an in-person butch support group in Massachusetts. I know that for a least part of the group’s existence it was held at a space where Lane had to admit trans women to the group but otherwise would’ve excluded them. There was one butch trans woman who attended and I heard Lane make comments making it clear that they would’ve excluded her if they could’ve gotten away with it. I have heard that at one point or another their in-person group did exclude trans women....

Lane is still selling their art to LGBT people and involving themself with LGBT people who are unaware of their agenda. please help spread this

Ky Schevers (ex-TERF) has officially released a statement confirming details of TERF activities taken up by Coyotesnout (on Instagram), including the fact that Coyotesnout was active in some of Ky's own in-person TERF groups. Coyotesnout was quite active on here several years ago, details of which are confirmed at this link (*this link may ask you to do a captcha verification).

You can also see Ky's posting on this article on Twitter, where they've provided a summary of the statement, and there are additional details provided by others in the replies.

TL;DR Coyotesnout is still a cryptoTERF and is misleading trans people on Instagram in order to make a profit off of trans and queer art that she makes.

Please feel free to reblog AND consider saving/posting the link independently incase T*RFs nuke this post.

(post made April 21st, 2023)

#terfs /#transmisogyny /

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teespringbdonlinetshirts-blog · 2 years ago

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🎁🎁DROP A HINT WITH THESE EASY SETPS FOR PAYPAL 2022 FIFA WORLD CUP GIFT CARD ITS SUCH A AMAGING WOW🎁🎁it you want visit : https://tinyurl.com/43cd6xz2

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wherethingscomebackx · 4 years ago

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Top 25 Larry Fics of 2020

h 2020 was HELLISH. So thank you to all the writers, and I mean ALL of them, who kept us occupied as the world continues to burn.

You may be familiar with these lists:

Top 25 Larry fics of 2016

Top 25 Larry fics of 2017

Top 25 Larry fics of 2018

Top 25 Larry fics of 2019

We’re going on our 5th year!! As always, I read a lot of fic and the majority of it is Larry. I like making lists and I like Larry so I thought I’d do some minimal research of the top 25 larry fics published/completed in 2020 in order of least to most kudos (with links). All of these fics are top notch so you should all check them out!

25.) a trail of honey through it all by @yvesaintlourent (27k)

The boy in front of him, well really, the man in front of him, was like something out of a confusing wet dream. Built, tall, tan and muscular, his skin glistened with sweat after a long day of working outdoors with his hands. He was wearing a cut up old American football shirt, the bottom hem was torn and the sleeves were cut off to the point where the t-shirt was really just a loose tank top. The shorts he had on had clearly been full length jeans at one point, and were now just crudely cut off above the knee. His white socks were pulled up too high on his calves, and the brown work boots he had on were old as fuck, the leather peeling along the edges of the soles. Curly brown hair stuck out from the edges of his backwards snapback, and there was a smudge of grease wiped along his brow bone. The smattering of hair along his jaw proved that he hadn’t shaved in a week or two, the hair growing in thicker across his upper lip and around his chin. His sinfully bowed mouth was pink and plump, and Louis was suddenly hyper-focused on the way that he chewed at the toothpick stuck between his lips. He looked like he needed a shower. Louis wanted to lick him.

Or, the TPH fic we’ve all been waiting for.

24.) even the best laid plans by @falsegoodnight (25k)

“Anyways,” Louis stresses, narrowing his eyes, “just let me say it and then rate how terrible of an idea it is on a scale from one to ten.”

“Alright,” Zayn agrees, sitting up expectantly.

“I want to ask Harry Styles to take my virginity,” Louis blurts, holding his hands out for emphasis.

The way Zayn’s eyes bulge is almost comical. “Negative infinity,” he says, voice choked. “Negative infinity times negative infinity.”

“Technically, a negative times a negative is -”

“Really negative infinity,” Zayn corrects himself, shaking his head wildly. “Louis, what the fuck?”

Or, Louis wants to have sex with someone and decides Harry is the perfect alpha for the job.

23.) A Distant Hazy Light by @greenfeelings (76k)

Life’s pretty ordinary for Harry. He lives with his best friend, got into university just like he’s planned, and manages to support himself just fine for an unbonded omega. If he sustains that lifestyle by getting paid to help alphas through their rut every now and then, that’s nothing to be hung up on. Until he’s hired by an alpha that turns everything upside down.

Or, Harry’s working on taking Louis’ walls down, until he builds his own up.

22.) Ghost Note Symphony by whoknows (96k)

Louis is on tour when he first hears about it. It’s all over the news – Harry Styles Attacked By Fan runs in headlines for days. It’s not even just the gossip rags, either. Actual journalists are covering the story. It would have been impossible to avoid hearing about it. Technically, Oli is the one who tells Louis about it, but it’s not exactly being covered up. Harry doesn’t answer Louis’ text asking if he’s alright, but that’s not really surprising. They haven’t spoken for months, and it’s been a lot longer than that since they’ve had a real conversation. The sting of the text going unanswered is still there, less painful than it might have been a few years ago.

It’s not that it’s easy to forget about, exactly. Louis has a whole life outside of One Direction now, though. So Louis goes on with his life, figuring that if Harry was seriously hurt he would have heard about it by now. He might currently be in the same country as Harry, but being on opposite sides of it puts enough distance between them that putting it in the back of his mind is easy. There’s nothing Louis could do, even if he thought Harry might want him to.

That’s why everything that happens next comes as a complete shock to him.

21.) Until by @allwaswell16 (38k)

Rural Eagle County, Colorado wasn’t the type of place to find a famous musician or actor. At least not until songwriter Louis Tomlinson showed up with pop star Niall Horan to visit his uncle’s horse ranch, and they just happened to find themselves next door to a reclusive former movie star.

20.) Strangers in Love by sweetums (42k)

Louis wakes up to find himself in a marriage with the last man he thought he'd ever end up with.

Prompt 51: An amnesia fic where louis and harry were enemies to lovers but after an accident, louis only remembers those memories that him and harry hated each other. now harry has to fix it. I think something like this less dark and less angsty compared to other amnesia fics and it could be funny

19.) A Long Way From The Playground by Pink_Sunsets (170k)

One Direction is broken up. They broke up five years ago. That should be the end of the story, right?

Harry is finished with One Direction. He now has a new life, one with two kids and a successful solo career. And he’s happy.

But a call one night from management flips Harry’s whole new life upside down, and he’s forced to face the life he had left behind.

As well as a certain blue eyed man who had left him behind.

18.) my love’s not simple (it’s fragile) by @falsegoodnight (27k)

“Can I take you out tomorrow?” he asks. “My shift ends at 7 but we can go for dinner at 8.”

Louis is silent for a few seconds and then, “Like… on a date?”

Harry swallows thickly. He hasn’t done this in years, hasn’t ever wanted to. “Yeah.”

He’s worried he’s misread things but then Louis raises his head to kiss Harry’s cheek. “Yeah,” he says easily. “Sure.”

Tension leaves his body swiftly. “Are you sure?” asks Harry. “I know we’re both so busy but I can’t not try with you, Lou.”

“Neither can I,” says Louis. “I think we can figure it out. I care about you a lot Harry. We’ve known each other for a week, but I already like you so much.”

Or Harry's new job is threatened by his impending rut. Desperate for a solution, he allows Niall to introduce him to Louis, an omega whose heat begins the same day. They click.

17.) Cocaine for Breakfast by @harryeatsburger (309k)

“It’s an easy job.” He continues, as if Louis wants to listen. “Like I said, a few trips. Parties, students, nothing dramatic.”

Louis gazes over to Harry. He’s looking thoughtful now, eyes on the green like he’s talking more to himself than Louis.

“Clubbing, drinks. Whatever, the business is just a side thing.”

That’s not how Louis remembers it to be, “You lying?” He honestly can’t tell.

Harry shakes his head slowly, meeting Louis' eyes.

“No,” He answers almost toneless. Harry clears his throat, “I won’t put you in any dangerous situation.” His voice is sincere, Louis can tell he means it, his jade green eyes glinting with truth.

or, - Louis Tomlinson is a drug addict, sent away from his beloved party-scene to recover. There, he discovers that small towns have just as much access to drugs as London did, plus something even better that he just can't get enough of. That something is a boy with green eyes and bouncy curls named Harry Styles. -

16.) Tastes like Strawberries by @sadaveniren (4k)

I’m stressed. I’m nesting and demand cuddles. Come over

Harry frowned and double checked who the text was from. Yup, it still said Louis - Grad, which meant it was from Louis from his grad school.

aka Louis texts Harry by mistake. It works out

15.) the way the storm blows by @rbbsbb (21k)

Louis doesn’t have a habit of thinking about Harry’s dick.

That would be weird, seeing as they’re best mates, and they share a flat, and they’ve spent holidays at each other’s family homes. Their friendship hasn’t ever risen to a point where Louis should want to see his mate’s dick, and he’s happy to keep it that way.

Except, all that Louis can think about is exactly that. The size of it. The shape. The amount of people it’s been in.

Maybe it’s the tequila talking, or the fact that Louis’ just recently walked in to an eyeful of Harry taking turns on some slags that he’s never seen before, but. Louis’ mind can’t stop obsessing over the idea.

14.) bruise you like a peach by @falsegoodnight (40k)

There’s two reasons Harry despises Econ.

The first is that it’s boring as fuck. The second reason is a bit more personal, a bit more focused in a way. As in it’s focused on one specific thing, or in his case, person.

His name is Louis Tomlinson.

13.) Watching The World Fall by whoknows (11k)

This segment has been going on long enough that Louis knows what’s coming before James starts in on it, trying to sell him on something he knows that Louis wouldn’t normally be buying. But there’s four cameras surrounding him, and an audience watching him expectantly, so if Louis wants to continue convincing people that he’s doing just fine, he’s going to have to go along with it.

“We have a whole host of single men backstage waiting to meet you, Louis,” James tells him. “We want to help you find love tonight, on Late Late Live Tinder. Is this okay? Do you want to play?”

It actually kind of makes sense that his first date after the break-up is going to be just as public as said break-up. Something like coming full circle.

“Alright, James,” Louis agrees, hopping down off his stool.

“Okay, come down to the stage,” James says. Louis can’t even tell whether the excitement in his voice is genuine or not. “Right now, come on down!”

12.) Quiet People Have the Loudest Minds by @2tiedships2 (38k)

Broadway shows were one of the few things that could keep Louis’ attention for a full two hours without needing to move about. But not tonight.

The alpha next to him was both infuriating him and practically turning him on at the same time. He needed to leave. The alpha, that is. Louis was staying.

Or the one where Louis is a nonverbal omega who has accepted the fact that he will never find an alpha that will treat him as an equal. On the other hand, he’s never met anyone like Harry.

11.) The Wrath of the Emerald Eyes by @purpledandeli0n (85k)

His chin is grabbed harshly, facing the two deep green eyes that have been getting on his nerves for the past ten minutes. The smirk on the man's face does not vanish. The grip of his hand on Louis' chin does not soften, his thumb at the side of his lower lip.

His smile widens as he answers Louis' question, ''My name is Styles, but you will call me Captain."

•

Pirate AU

10.) Canyon Moon by @eeveelou (40k)

For as long as Louis has remembered, he has been promised to be mated to Harry, his best friend and the future pack alpha. But Louis’s heart belonged to the forest and to the hunt more than he could ever imagine it belonging to Harry.

Then Harry’s father dies in a violent accident, and Louis’s future alpha disappears on the wind.

An A/B/O Lion King AU

9.) We Both Got Nothing to Hide by lovelarry10 (43k)

“Talk to me, Lou.”

“I can’t,” Louis mumbled, knowing he genuinely couldn’t say it. He couldn’t admit to what he was doing. “Don’t ask me to say it, because I can’t.”

“Then… I’ll try and guess. You’ve… got some stuff of Harry’s. Something of his to make it smell like him?”

Louis just nodded, eyes fixated on the floor. This was humiliating, but he knew Zayn wouldn’t stop until he found out what was going on.

“Okay. Like… a blanket, or a comforter or something?”

“Kind of…”

Omega Louis has a secret nest. Alpha Harry keeps losing his clothes.

8.) sleeping on our problems by @falsegoodnight (67k)

I’m in love with you, Louis thinks. He feels empty, weighed down by his sadness and the loss of Harry inside him just moments ago before his knot finally went down.

There’s moments where he’s sure Harry feels the same. Like now, when he’s gazing down at Louis with so much adoration and tenderness. It’s like they’re both on the cusp of something more, but neither of them ever say a word.

His confession is on the tip of his tongue ready to slide out like honey, and yet he remains silent. They both do, looking at each other and recognizing the reluctance mirrored in each other’s eyes. It’s then that Louis realizes they’re both scared.

Or Louis sleeps with Harry and they have more than just catching feelings to worry about.

7.) like it’s a game by @soldouthaz (32k)

there is little harry hates more than truth or dare.

and louis.

6.) before we knew by @falsegoodnight (39k)

“C’mon Lou,” says Zayn after a moment, He sounds even more exasperated than before. Louis sort of has a knack for exasperating people, especially people like Zayn who aren’t usually bothered by his brattiness. “Can’t you give this guy a chance? Harry Styles? Aren’t you curious about him at all?”

Despite his best efforts, Louis still flinches at the name. He really shouldn’t be so affected after all these years. He’s seen the name printed down the curve of his waist in obnoxiously and uncommonly large loopy letters every single day since his sixteenth birthday eight years ago. He’s very familiar with the name Harry Styles.

It sounds pretentious and Louis hates it.

He hates everything about his supposed soulmate.

He hates his large handwriting that stands out like a claim on his skin whenever he’s walking around shirtless. He hates his pretentious name. And now he hates his supposed curls and green eyes and dimples.

Or Louis has been skeptical of soulmates for years so it seems like fate when he finally bumps into the owner of the obnoxiously large signature printed into his skin since age sixteen: Harry Styles, a human rights attorney who is firmly against soulmates.

5.) Mine Would Be You by @crinkle-eyed-boo (114k)

Louis blinks his eyes open, his eyelids fluttering as the room swims around him. He takes several gulps of beer once he confirms that he’s definitely not hallucinating, that the very first portrait Harry Styles ever painted of him is hanging on that wall.

Louis stares at the wall, his heart jackrabbiting in his chest as he realizes that there’s not just one painting of him, there’s five, the portraits lined up like they’re some sort of storyboard depicting the rise and fall of his deepest love. His greatest heartache. A pain that cut him so deep that he left the fucking country, severing all ties with his life in New York, now suddenly surrounding him as if he’d never left.

Fucking shit motherfucker fuck.

Louis returns to New York City five years after he left it – and the love of his life – behind. He didn't intend to see Harry again, but fate has a funny way of pulling them together, whether they like it or not. After making a begrudging truce, they both start to wonder: Would it be so bad if history repeated itself?

4.) You’ve Got My Devotion (Hate You Sometimes) by @harryrainbows (95k)

Harry was in the biggest boy band in the world. He was also one half of the best (or worst, depends on who you ask) kept secret relationship in the music industry.

Now, almost five years on, after One Direction has broken up, and Harry and Louis' relationship has as well, a video threatens to put everything at risk.

One determined Irishman, a massive publicity stunt and two begrudging exes are all it takes to bring One Direction back to life and maybe, just maybe, Harry and Louis' mangled love life too.

Or: Harry and Louis are forced to fake-date after an old video from when they were dating emerges.

3.) The Space Between by @lads-laddylads (39k)

Harry Styles is the alpha rockstar who can’t sleep and doesn’t know why.

Louis Tomlinson is the omega PhD student who helps him figure it out.

2.) Nothing But You On My Mind by @absoloutenonsense (83k)

Louis Tomlinson is a PR manager hired to improve the image of royal bad-boy Prince Harry Styles. Unfortunately for him, that means being faced with the Prince's constant innuendos, incessant dirty jokes, and relentless flirting. Louis just wants to make it to Princess Gemma's coronation; once she's crowned Queen, his contract is up and he never has to see the Prince again.

1.) Collision by @tequiladimples (224k)

Mythology/Fairytale!AU in which Louis is a dainty fairy with a temper who wants to be intimidating and Harry hurts people. Naturally, they hate each other.

(Featuring Liam, the big and not-so-bad wolf who’s got a thing for humans, Zayn, a human with supernaturally good looks, and Niall, the cupid who just wants his job to be easier.)

#larry #larry stylinson #larry fic rec #harry styles #louis tomlinson #fic rec #one direction #1d #one direction fic rec #larry fan fiction #updated because I'm an idiot and added a zarry fic

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heejojo · 3 years ago

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Love Isn't Beautiful But With You It Was

✰ summary: y/n and niki's journey from being enemies to friends to much more than that.

✰ pairing: Niki x fem!reader (and a Jay apperance)

✰ genre: fluff, angst, enemies to childhood friends to lovers

✰ warning: a few sad scenes but I'm not sure they'll be too bad! death

✰ word count: 1.8k (the most so far tbh)

a/n: this is my first fanfic so please leave comments about what should be improved. if you have any requests feel free to leave them! it's past 12am now and I need to sleep but I hope you have a nice day!

prompt gotten from @moonlight-chi77 thank you!

“Love isn’t beautiful but with you it was”

Life disappears in the blink of an eye, but the memories created and the human connection formed does not. The memories created are embedded in our hearts and follow us through different paths of life. Whether those memories are good or bad, they become something we reflect on in later moments.

Nishimura Riki couldn’t exactly remember the first time he met you but all he knew was that he had never hit off with someone the way he did with you.

September 2012

Although Niki couldn't pinpoint the exact date you guys started talking, he knew it was in September of 2012. He knew at first he disliked you and wanted nothing to do with you because you had stolen his spot on the swings.

“That's my spot, I told Jay I was going to stay here forever,” he said while his friend who was behind him nodded enthusiastically, backing him up.

“Your name is not on it and you didn’t buy it so why should I leave?” you asked him without coming down because you got there fair and square.

“I called dibs on it,” he said while puffing out his chest.

“Dibs are for babies,” you say while continuing to swing. “I’m not a baby,” he retorts.

“If you say so, then why are you wearing a Talking Tom T-Shirt?” you ask and his face begins to turn red. “It's cool, isn't it Jay?” he nudges his friend asking him for support. “Cool man, girls just suck” Jay responds and they both leave. “At least I dress myself!” you yell at their retreating figures

After that day, Niki made it his mission to disturb you every day and never wore his Talking Tom shirt again after that day.

August 2016

“Niki!!” you screamed as you felt another water balloon hit your leg. At this point, your entire body was soaked. The young boy continued to laugh and run as you chased him. You were beginning to regret spending your summer break with him when you could be watching TV instead. Eventually, you give up chasing the blond-haired boy and go into the house to dry off. Thirty minutes later, Niki comes in with a bottle of orange juice as a form of apology. You snatch it without further thought and drink it. Looking up at him after you finish drinking it, you both burst into a fit of laughter. “You’re lucky I love food,” you say. Maybe spending the summer with him wouldn't be so bad.

December 2018

Your crush on Niki was painfully obvious to everyone but him. Your friends teased you, his friends teased you yet when you were together you denied it with so much vigour. Niki had liked you for a few months now. Everyone was enjoying the slow burn that was going on between the two of you; the soft glances across the room, the way you always looked for each other among crowds, the way he knew where your secret birthmark was even though your close friends didn’t.

It was the way you complimented each other that made everyone cringe and aw at the same time. The jacket you got him for his birthday was his most prized piece of clothing and the only person he let touch it was his mum. This year though, you gathered enough courage and told him how he meant to you and how you were content with being just friends even if it hurt a little. But you weren’t expecting Niki to say he felt the same way, even more so. Your friends heaved a sigh of relief and choruses of ‘Finally’ were echoed.

It felt good being with someone.

January 2019

Everyone argued with people they loved right? Your parents did, the old lady that sells fruit and her boyfriend did so you and Niki weren’t an exception. After being childhood friends for so long you’d think you could trust each other enough to talk about the things that bothered you but he refused to, claiming that he didn’t want you to see him in a different light and how it would hurt his pride. You would tell him that no one knew him more and cared about him the way you did. At times, you’d let it go not wanting to push him but that day you couldn’t take it.

“We need to talk. Why have you been avoiding me these past few days?” you asked him.

“I’ve just been busy” he replied.

“No, you’ve been avoiding me. I know you well enough to know when you're hiding something” you said.

He wouldn't budge, he never did especially when you cornered him like this. He started to get irritated and said, “I said I’ve been busy so forgive me if I can’t give you attention all the time. Not all of us are as clingy as you” You winced; it was your fault for pushing him to the edge like that. Nevertheless, you wouldn't give up. “ I just want you to say how you feel and what bothers you. I’d never look at you in a different light and you know that. You might want to be strong but it’s okay to show some sort of emotion, it doesn’t make you weak rather it makes you look like someone that acknowledges what is wrong and doesn’t try to ignore the problem or solve it on their own” you comforted him. As the words entered his ears, you could see the walls surrounding his heart crumbling. “It’s okay to ask for help or just to rant to someone. Even if we won’t be able to provide an immediate solution, it should help” you added taking a few steps forward and grabbing a hold of his hands. You squeezed them tightly.

“I...I’m just scared you’ll leave once you see the not so perfect side of me” he managed to say. “I will stay with you, why don’t we make the best of everything without worrying about the future?” you asked while smiling. He returned it and pulled you in for a hug. “Thank you, truly,” he said and you smiled under his embrace.

After a few minutes you spoke up, “Oh yeah, Niki?” you called his attention and he hummed in response. “Don’t ever shout at me like that again, I can deck you and you know it” you said.

“Got it, boss. Sorry for being a jerk”

June 2020

You usually went on diets and exercised a lot but you were losing weight at an extreme rate and you weren’t even on a diet. Niki was worried but you brushed it off telling him it was stress from school but it got worse. You found it difficult for you to balance yourself, you felt nauseated, getting even more frequent headaches and being tired all the time so Niki decided that enough was enough and took you to the hospital. Neither of you had expected the result of the scans that were run.

“I’m sorry but there is a tumour in your brain,” the doctor said. The air left your lungs. “You can choose to get the surgery and live in the hospital for 8 months or live with the tumour for 3 months” he continued. You thanked him and left the hospital. The elephant in the room was very much alive and neither one of you wanted to address it. Did you want to stay in the hospital for the rest of your life or did you want to say with your loved ones? You thought that they would go through and that won’t be worth it.

“Niki” you called out.

He looked at you with a sad smile and just pulled you in for a hug, careful not to hurt you. “Do you want to tell your parents?” You nodded. You couldn’t just leave without saying anything. Picking your jacket, Niki drove you to your parents house.

“I just wanted you guys to know, I couldn’t just leave without saying anything,” you said with your eyes cast downwards. You couldn’t bear to look at your mom who was already crying or your dad who was blaming himself even when it wasn’t his fault or your sister who was basically your best friend. Niki had given you guys privacy but you knew it was just an excuse for him to be with his own feelings.

“I’m going to stay close to home in the meantime so I can be closer to you guys,” you said. Your eyes were already becoming glossy with tears. You inched towards your mom, taking her hand in yours and said, “You did an amazing job of being my mom and I love you so much”. Moving to your dad, you said “You did a good job of protecting me so don’t think otherwise. Let’s make all the memories we want to now without any regrets”. At that, your sister burst into tears “I… I can’t bear to lose you” Your heart clenched. “I can’t bear to lose you too” She continued crying. Your mom wiped her eyes and said, “From today, live the way you want to. Eat what you want and do what you want.” From the corner of my eye, I saw Niki staring watching the whole scene. After an hour, I stood up and went home with Niki. The car ride was a long and awkward one. When we got home, we just slept hugging each other.

Starting tomorrow I was going to live.

July 2020

The pain is getting worse but the smiles on my family and friends faces are enough to keep me going. I wrote letters and got gifts for them. Niki looks at the calendar every day, I can’t tell him to stop because I can tell he’s hurting so much. Why can’t I just be okay for everyone?

August 2020

The time comes faster, Niki and I went on a getaway for a few days. He deserved a break from everything that has been going on.

September 2020

I never thought I'd die as silly as that sounds. I asked my parents and sister to leave when I got to the hospital. Niki refused to leave and stayed there till I took in my last breath. He kept crying begging me not to go and how he’d do anything.

“Does it hurt a lot?” he asked between sniffles

“No it doesn’t, it just feels like a needle” it hurt like a truck.

“Liar”

I chuckled and held his hand till I couldn’t anymore. “I love you’’ I say as the lights fade.

╔═*.·:·.✧ ✦ ✧.·:·.*═╗

Dear Nishimura Riki,

When you see this, it means I’m already gone. First of all, don’t beat yourself up too much. I could write for ages about how much I love you but now that I need to, my mind goes blank. You’ve done so well for putting up with me, hats off to you. You might not want to but move on, even though id like you to remember me; let your heart heal and be happy.

Take care of yourself and don’t skip any meals. Eat well and be happy, make sure you visit the places we never got to visit and enjoy yourself. Live life the way you want it every day. Be nice to people and smile more.

Thank you for all the happy memories, my love, I’ll be forever grateful for you. You made my life colourful and worth living.

Love isn’t beautiful but with you it was.

Yours truly,

Y/N.

#enhypen #enhypen angst #enhypen x reader #enhypen scenarios #enhypen imagines #character death #enhypen fluff

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dragonbeak · 2 years ago

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Furry Weekend Atlanta 2022 was amazing!!!

For the first time in years, let's return to convention review!

Well, I gotta say, for a first big con to return to I'm glad it was FWA 2022! FWA has always been one of my favorite local cons, even if circumstances had prevented me from attending since 2016.

At the encouragement of friends I applied for the 2022 Dealers Den last fall, got waitlisted, and then received an email from Dealers Den head, Kay, about a month before the event. And I was like, okay!!!

So April was a big rush to produce new merch to make my FWA DD debut exciting! This included a new line of pride python pinback buttons, repurposing some Helluva Boss fanart as pinback buttons as well, and my most exciting, a new shirt design "Slither Slaughter Slumber" which I had been workshopping for years but put on the backburner with pandemic times and all. And woo! I'm so glad my shirt manus pulled through, Terminus Tees are great to work with, if anyone happens to be looking for a GA based T-shirt printing company.

Man, this was the fastest I'd ever sent a file to print, haha! Also my first 3-ink color shirt which I was a little nervous about because it raises the printing cost. But it was all worth it because furries loved the shiiiiiiiiiiiiiirts!!!

Muwhahaha, so this was my first big con to have shirts as merch. And, dang, they were definitely my best items. Which was very encouraging because outside of Kickstarter my Etsy shirt sales are like... eh??? For what it's worth I know I could have better and more engaging product photos but I don't know the first thing about directing a real photo shoot.

But huh, I've mostly been talking about the con prep so far and not FWA itself? Well!!! Lemme tell you, FWA was a blast! All the attendees were so nice, everyone abided by mask rules, everyone was really kind and said such nice things. I appreciated how transparent con staff, especially Kay and the Dealers Den team, were about running the event. Even if you could tell they were working really hard due to being a little understaffed!! ovo;;; Oh man guys, don't work too hard. Understandable, since it's the first FWA to be hosted in person in about 3 years???

And my fellow vendors! Wow, I think this was the most nice welcoming experience from other vendors. I got the most art trade offers ever, got to network with folks and talk shop. I also got the feeling most furry vendors already knew each other? That was very interesting. This was actually my first time vending at FWA in the Dealers Den instead of Artist Alley and I think it was a very good fit for where my art selling hobby is at now. I also went a little wild and splurged a bit XD;; Muwhahaha! Everyone had such beautiful art!

Since it had been a while since I last sold at a furry convention, I forgot how nice furry attendees are to artists TToTT Ah, everyone was so nice. Man, I left the experience feeling really inspired and more pumped than ever to make more art merch!!! But then... just as I was getting ready to relax after one impromptu convention... Momocon literally emailed me the following Monday asking if I'd like to get off the waitlist for their convention in two weeks!!! ovo;;; Oh man!!!

To be continued?

#furry weekend atlanta #fwa22 #fwa #convention

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thatcartoonnetworkblog · 3 years ago

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Cartoon Network Hotel Review

WHAT TIME IS IT????

If you don’t find yourself screaming this when you get here, even just in your head, then you’re in the wrong place.

But after a nice drive through Amish Country, the Cartoon Network Hotel is nice and visible right outside of Dutch Wonderland. Coming in, you see images of some of your favorite characters, right before Finn and Jake welcome you at the front.

Granted, it looks like I came off season- with fall and school just starting, Dutch Wonderland is only open on the weekends, and the hotel wasn’t exactly packed from what I can see. Which made for a good time for the indoor pool to be under renovation, so I sadly didn’t get to check that out. But hey, the outdoor pool was running just fine, although it was mostly empty, just myself and a family.

I didn’t take any pictures of the pool, since I didn’t have my phone (but a couple of Ice King’s penguins are playing life guard duty, alongside a pretty cute girl), but I did snap a photo of the Powerpuff sprinklers! They look pretty cool, right?

But that’s jumping ahead. Anyway, as mentioned, today it didn’t seem so busy, so despite arriving a couple of hours before 4 PM check-in, I was able to get a room right away. It must have been busy enough that I didn’t get the Gumball room I asked for, but instead I got my second choice, Steven Universe.

But I mean, look at this. I can’t complain. I was just thinking that I wanted the SU room instead, anyway.

The rooms are themed to one of six shows/franchises, the other four being Powerpuff Girls, Ben 10, Adventure Time and We Bare Bears. The former two seem to be primarily inspired by their recent series however, not their classics, so your mileage will vary there. I asked a receptionist which show tends to be the most popular choice, and she says that it rotates. Apparently PPG does get picked often by those who grew up with it, which makes sense, although those aren’t my Powerpuff Girls.

So, some things of note- there are four exclusive channels to the Hotel. Gumball and Teen Titans Go get their own 24/7 channels, which seems redundant since they’re basically all CN shows anyway. But they also have a FanFavs channel, which shows various episodes from various series, and New Shows, which I’m not sure if it shows currently unaired episodes or not. I couldn’t get that one active for long, but I did see part of a Victor & Valentino episode. I did have FanFavs on a bit as background noise, and they seem to mostly show:

Adventure Time

Regular Show

Steven Universe

Ben 10 (2016)

Mao Mao

Thundercats Roar (seriously...)

It seems like they mostly rotate from those shows, but I’d like to believe there’s more. Griz is on the cover bar for it when you connect to wifi, and you’d think they’d also show at least the 2016 PPG show as well, as that’s all over the resort.

They also do showings of cartoons in the kitchen at 3 and 9 PM, as the kitchen is closed during those times. My flight was very early, so I missed the 9 showing, as well as the Summer Camp Island-inspired bonfire that happened before, but I caught the 3 o’clock cartoons. They played episodes of Craig of the Creek, Total Dramarama, Teen Titans Go, and Gumball. Pretty cool, although these are basically the only four shows the channel plays anyway, The intro they use for the screenings shows clips from classic Looney Tunes, Tom and Jerry, and Scooby-Doo cartoons, but none of those were shown today. Maybe they’ll throw one in at another time? Probably not Scooby... or maybe just a movie, since they apparently play movies as well sometimes.

I didn’t stick around for most of the TDR cartoon though, as I was participating in the Craig of the Creek scavenger hunt. They hunt various CN characters around the lobby vicinity, and you try to find them in the right spot.

This is what you get if you win- a COTC pin and a Hershey bar. But hey, you can’t argue with results, and this is about it for Craig merch.

The gift shop almost exclusively focuses on the six shows with featured rooms, and a lot of merch isn’t exclusive. I did get a couple of things though.

The beach towel is based on the designs you see all over the hotel and has a couple of series not otherwise represented in terms of merch, like OK KO, Summer Camp Island, and the aforementioned COTC. Oh, and Clarence! Almost missed him in the bottom.

I got the stickers because there are more COTC characters, and again, the designs are nice. The SU pin was cool, and if there was a similar one for AT or Gumball, I would have got that as well. And I got the Anais keychain because Gumball merch is strangely rare despite its popularity, especially for her. There were also some pencils, notebooks, a couple of T-shirts and a hoodie. I almost got some pencils.

There’s also an arcade and an activity center, but those do seem mostly for kids, plus you have to pay for most of the crafts. I think the coloring is free at least, and there are a couple of nods to classic shows I found that I’ll share on another post.

Just as there are some nods to classics around the place, primarily the elevator and kitchen, but the people who want to see Dexter and Johnny and the Eds aren’t the target audience for this resort. Which is unfortunate, but the thing is, besides the fact that we’re getting old and today’s kids need their own shows, Cartoon Network has become a big deal internationally over the past decade, moreso than during their supposed heyday in the late 90′s-early 00′s. The six shows featured aren’t just picked for being the most popular, they’re all big draws overseas. We Bare Bears sells a LOT of merch in Asia and parts of Europe, even if it doesn’t seem that big of a draw stateside. Hopefully they can make this a tourist spot.

That said, I do hope that they consistently update things in the years to come. Part of the problem with the Nickelodeon Hotel over in Orlando was how stuck it was in the mid-2000′s. Sure, SpongeBob has remained a big draw over the years since, but when I visited the place around 2010 (didn’t stay, but took a tour), it was apparent that if your kids weren’t big fans of Rugrats or Jimmy Neutron, and they probably weren’t around that place until its last days, there wasn’t much reason to stay over.

I do think that Craig deserves his own themed room, and it may be time to swap out Powerpuff for it. Let’s admit that the 2016 reboot was a failure and move on. Or maybe just double down and replace the reboot designs with their classic look.

But hey, my final thoughts on the Cartoon Network Hotel? I had a lot of fun, and got the best sleep I had in ages. I’m not sure if I’d go again, though. At least unless it changes things up a little. Part of the thing is that this is really for the kids who love today’s new shows. And I do really love three of the six shows heavily featured here- four if you count the original Powerpuff. But I’m just not the right age for this place.

If you love any of these shows and/or Cartoon Network’s brand as a whole, I recommend checking this place out, but only if you’re near the area. Don’t make it a pilgrimage. Unless you have enough friends to make grouping up on the Steven Universe Dream Suite worth it.

That said, look at these Bear macrons. So damn cute, and tasty, too!

#my ramblings #cartoon network #cartoon network hotel

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dancedance-resolution · 3 years ago

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andi mack friendom, are you interested in some more thoughts about my andi mack / american girl crossover (which is actually just a thinly veiled info dump about american girl history and drama)? if so, you're in the right place!

the andi / buffy / cyrus doll set i designed would be a contemporary line.

CONTEXT (forewarning, this is basically just an ag info dump about the 2017 contemporary line) (also, tagging @kirstensleepey because i think this write up might be useful for the ag project you're working on <3):

so in 2017, american girl did a brand new thing. they released 3 dolls who were contemporary characters but not girls of the year. (prior to these dolls' release, which are called "the contemporary line" by the ag fandom, the only categories of ag dolls were historicals, girls of the year, and just like yous.)

the contemporary line was controversial for many reasons.

first, we have our main character, tenney grant. (tenney is basically taylor swift as a doll, if taylor were uncool and a r*publican lol.)

one of the reasons why tenney is so controversial is that she overshadowed the girl of the year (henceforth abbreviated as goty) 2017, gabriella mcbride.

tenney was released only one month after gabriella's release. ag's social media gave much more focus to tenney than gabriella. upon tenney's release, gabriella's store displays were downsized (which is unheard of for a goty). tenney even had a larger collection than gabriella!

why are we mad about tenney overshadowing gabriella? well, gabriella was ag's first (and as of 2021, ONLY) black goty. also, gabriella was ag's first doll to have an explicity confirmed disability - her stutter.

BRIEF INTERMESSION - SOME STATISTICS ABOUT DIVERSITY IN CHARACTER DOLLS:

only 7 out of the 22 total historical characters have been dolls of color. only 3 out of 22 historicals have been black (one of which is now retired). only 2 out of 22 have been aapi (one of these dolls, ivy, was just a best friend doll and is now retired; and the other doll, nanea, has a problematic face mold. i wrote an essay about why her facemold is problematic here!). only 1 historical doll, josefina, is hispanic, and ag has actually misspelled her name as "josephina" on their social media before.

only 1 doll EVER has been native american, kaya'aton'my, who is a historical character from 1764. (not even any of the just like you dolls have had kaya's face mold! kaya is truly the only indigenous doll!) in fact, ag has had more colonizer characters than indigenous characters. felicity and elizabeth are white character dolls from 1776, and their books fail to address the issues surrounding colonization and treatment of native americans. and kirsten is a swedeish immigrant to wisconsin in 1854. her book does acknowledge the existence of native americans, and kirsten has an indigenous friend named singing bird. (i haven't read kirsten's books and i'm not indigenous, so i can't comment on this storyline.) ag actually had a controversy about kirsten just this year - in 2021, the t-shirt design for kirsten said "settlers gonna settle", and ag actually ended up changing the design to "cabin sweet cabin" after backlash.

moving on to the girl of the year line - out of 21 goty dolls, gabriella is the ONLY black goty. only 6 out of 21 gotys have been dolls of color. there have been 2 hispanic characters (luciana, who is generally regarded as an excellent doll; and marisol, who is controversial because her book talks about how her family moved from pilsen chicago - a real area of chicago that is home to many hispanic immigrants - to a white suburb due to crime. this storyline involves racist stereotypes.) also, goty 2016 lea clark (slightly tan skin, blonde hair, light green eyes) is 1/8th brazilian, and some brazilian ag fans consider the emphasis on lea being 1/8th brazilian racial feticization. next, there have been 3 aapi gotys. one of these dolls, sonali, was one of two best friend dolls for chrissa (goty 2009) - yep, you heard that right, yet another doll of color that is a side character! sonali is the bully in chrissa's books, but she gets a redemption arc. to this day, sonali is ag's only south asian character doll. [additionally, there has been some criticism that all of the aapi gotys are mixed race - jess mcconell (goty 2006) has a japanese mother and an irish/scottish father, kanani akina (goty 2011) has a french/german mother and a japanese/hawaiian father, and sonali matthews has an indian mother and a father of unknown race/ethincity. perhaps notably, the only aapi historical doll who is not currently retired (nanea) is also mixed race (hawaiian mother and scottish father).]

as for the disability thing i mentioned - ag also has a disappointing track record regarding disability representation, lol. it was very lightly implied that mckenna (goty 2012) had a learning disability, but that was never confirmed. mckenna's tutor, who used a wheelchair, was ag's first big disability rep, but she was just a side character in mckenna's story. then, many ag fans were disappointed when mary ellen, a historical character released in 2015, was able-bodied (in canon, she had polio as a child, so it would make sense for mary ellen to be disabled and use mobility aids). finally, in 2020, goty joss gave us some disability rep - she has a hearing aid.

ag's lack of disability rep is very frustrating, especially considering that doll companies, like our generation, have made some really cool disabled dolls. and ag has been doing this ad campaign with the paralympics that feels performative to me - like, they want to seem inclusive by featuring dolls with prostetic legs, but they don't even sell dolls like that!!!

lastly, religious diversity - iirc, there are three jewish dolls (rebecca, goty 2001/2002 lindsey, and goty 2009 chrissa). the rest of the dolls are either christian or of unspecified religion. there has never been an explicitly muslim, hindu, or buddhist doll, or a doll who is a member of any religion other than judaism/christianity/unspecified. (there is some hope that we might get a muslim doll, though, since an outfit with a hijab was leaked, and ag trademarked a persian name that i can't recall off the top of the head at my moment. but take these with a grain of salt - ag trademarks a ton of stuff that they don't use, and the leak could be false or just a truly me outfit.)

END OF INTERMISSION - BACK TO THE TENNEY/GABRIELLA CONTROVERSY:

so, we get our first black goty, and she's being totally overshadowed by tenney.

here's where a conspiracy comes in:

we can track when ag trademarks their character names. goty names are usually trademarked early in the year prior to their release (by may). but gabriella mcbride wasn't trademarked until october, iirc.

and gabriella is a very underdeveloped character in comparison to most gotys. one of her main hobbies - dancing - was the same main hobby as both marisol (goty 2005) and isabelle (goty 2014). her store displays were underemphasized in comparison to tenney's, as i mentioned before. she was the first goty who didn't get a movie in six years (since kanani, goty 2011). and gabriella didn't even have a big ticket accessory item available until summer!

so, we get our first black goty, and she's underdeveloped, underemphasized, seems to have been rushed (due to her trademark date), and overshadowed by tenney just one month after her release. why is that?

well, some people think that tenney was actually supposed to be goty 2017! (i agree)

tenney was trademarked earlier, had more development, had a bigger collection, etc. we think that tenney was supposed to be goty 2017, but ag decided to do a doll of color (gabriella) at the last minute. (keep in mind the climate of 2015/2016 - ag probably wanted some clout for doing a black goty, and they also probably heard the ag fandom's demands for more dolls of color.)

so that's tenney.

next we have logan everett. logan was ag's first boy character doll. i'm glad that ag had a boy character doll, but logan kinda missed the mark for me. the main source of controversy surrounding logan is his face mold: he, a white boy, uses the kaya face mold. !! it kinda felt like a slap in the face to many indigenous ag fans - kaya is literally The Only Doll with the kaya face mold, and when we finally get another doll with her face mold, he's not even indigenous.

lastly, we have z yang my beloved <3. z yang was done dirty - she is yet another doll of color who is a mere side character, and also, she was available for only a total of 20 months before being retired!

so, that's everything i have to say about the 2017 contemporary line.

now i'm going to talk about the 2021 contemporary line :3

so, it's summer 2020. the black lives matter is becoming more mainstream. brands are now getting clout for appearing "woke."

so, admist this climate, ag is (as always) facing demands from its fandom/collectors to diversify its doll line. so they announce that they're going to be doing a new contemporary line, to be released in "the second half of 2021"!!!! and they promise that the contemporary line will have a black lead character

fast forward to modern day. thanks to ag's trademarks, we can safely assume that the new contemporary line will be called "world by us." we can safely assume that the line will have 3 characters. the 3 characters all live in washington dc and are best friends :) we can safely assume that the characters will be maritza ochoa, evette peeters, and makena williams. i talked about makena and maritza on that ask regrettable-username sent me about my andi mack/ag headcanons! personally, i'm excited for world by us, and i think it has a lot of potential!

alright sawyer, that's the end of the ag info dump fhjhdhfskf.

now for my andi mack friends:

i think the andi/buffy/cyrus line would be structured similar to world by us: andi is the main character, and buffy and cyrus are her best friend dolls :) all 3 dolls would be released at the same time. andi would have 3 books that have buffy and cyrus as side characters, and buffy and cyrus would have one book each.

the big ticket item for this collection would be andi's andi shack. i'm imagining its design sort of like kira's tent mixed with lanie's camper mixed with blaire's farm. andi the walls of andi shack would open up so that when it's fully opened, the four walls are on an even plane with the back wall and extended out like wings. you remove the roof before opening up the walls. the shack is tall enough that the doll can comfortably stand up even with the roof still attached, and wide enough that all three dolls (andi, buffy, and cyrus) can comfortably stand next to each other inside of andi shack.

andi shack would come with a ton of craft supplies inside of it. it would also come with a little flower box that has cece's african violets, like blaire's flower box. (thanks to regrettable-username for coming up with the african violets idea fdjfsj.)

alright i have to go now, so these are all my andi mack/ag thoughts for now, but i might be back later with more thoughts fhdfjs (hopefully not though, since typing this out took me over three hours [sweating emoji]).

sorry for any typos and sorry for how scatterbrained this is! also this may have some forgotten things/mildly incorrect things bc my only source is my brain (and a photo of all the dolls so i can count how many dolls for the statistics portion) and my brain is not the most reliable thing on earth lol.

#long post #american girl dolls #i feel kinda bad about putting this in the andi mack tag since it's mostly ag related; but it does include info about my andi mack/ag au #and the friendom has seemed to be really enjoying the andi mack/ag au (nostalgia i guess) so uhhh hopefully you guys will enjoy this? lol #andi mack

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peaches-writes · 4 years ago

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not-so-secret santa

skz of christmas day 7: exchange gift with minho

member: minho wc: 1.7k genre: fluff, childhood friends to lovers au, college au, a side of established relationship au warning: explicit language, threatening (?) note: this is me channeling all of my younger self’s christmas frustrations into a short fic lmao

christmas 2006

“Minho, who did you pick?” Your Homeroom teacher at the time, Ms. Yang, asked your classmate next to keep the Secret Santa chain going. The previous exchange was from Chan to Mina but since Mina already received her gift from Bam Bam, your teacher naturally picked Minho who was sitting right next to Chan.

Next to you, said boy then handed you the red and green-wrapped rectangle in his hands. “Merry Christmas, Y/N!” He greeted you as per Mrs. Yang’s instructions when someone will give their Secret Santa present, a mischievous smile on his face. “Enjoy!”

Your excited smile immediately fell into an angry frown as the hard rectangle is then placed on your lap. “All this time...” You pouted at Minho then, carefully picking up the gift in your hands. “You even bought this with me and you didn’t even bother making an effort!”

The entire class looked at you inquisitively but, in the moment, you didn’t really care. You already knew that the empty picture frame Minho thought was a genius idea to gift for the Secret Santa as a prank was inside the wrapping you held, you’d know because your respective moms took you on the same shopping trip where he got it.

Minho was not yet your best friend at the time but you were so childishly angry at that point that you didn’t hesitate on hitting him with the picture frame. “Ugh, Lee Minho, I hate you!”

Minho’s mom ended up buying you lunch after.

christmas 2011

“Ooh, I can’t wait to see who Minho picked for the Secret Santa.” Chan excitedly rubbed his palms together next to you, earning him a glare from you at hearing his tone of voice.

“I can’t wait to laugh if it’s you.” You deadpanned, making him chuckle.

“Ya, what’s with the death glare? I wasn’t teasing you!” He then held his hands up in defense but your glare is unwavering. “Well, not directly, at least.”

You only scoffed in response, turning your attention back to this class Christmas party’s MC, Seungkwan, who’s now, as if on cue, called onto your best friend to give away his Secret Santa gift.

“Y/N!” Minho then called for you, making yours and Chan’s eyes widen from across your large class circle. He held up the red package in his hand, the one he made you wrap yourself the night before as punishment for losing in a sleepover game, then exclaimed, “Catch!”

You weren’t given much time to process his words before the package is flung at you, landing just in front of the accumulating stack of gifts right in front of you from your other friends.

The entire class gasped before falling silent, collectively having a flashback of your 2nd grade fight with Minho over the same thing. Everyone (Chan mostly), just hoped that Minho got you something better than the empty picture frame.

But by the way your ears started to fume and you immediately stood up to tackle Minho said otherwise.

“Lee Minho, have you ever had a white T-shirt shoved in your mouth?!” You threatened as you approached him with the ‘gift’ he prepared for your Secret Santa.

Luckily, Chan was strong enough by then to hold you back.

Minho ended up (reluctantly) buying you dinner to 'compensate.’

christmas 2016

“What number did you get?” Minho asked you, resting his chin on your shoulder to peer at the folded piece of paper in your hands after. “Oh, number 10! Awesome, that’s from me!”

It’s the one year you didn’t get to go Christmas shopping with him because you caught a fever and the class Secret Santa’s been experimentally switched out for the White Elephant game and you still somehow ended up with his present. You groaned and pulled yourself away from Minho, turning around to face him. “What is it this time, Minho?”

“It’s something useful this time, I promise!” He swore with a hand raised on his side, going over his chest to form a cross after.

And Minho really thought he was doing something buying a mug for you with his face printed on it.

“See?” The boy pointed out after the gifts have been distributed. You didn’t pounce on him immediately this time since the mug could easily break. Instead, you waited until his mom picked the two of you up until you punched his arm. “It even changes to another face when you pour hot water on it!”

To prove it to you, he barged into your home on Christmas Day and made you hot chocolate topped with marshmallows. The photo of him with a heart eyes filter on the mug changed into him with a Godzilla filter.

christmas 2020

“Put your seatbelt on, brat.” You instruct your boyfriend as you expertly twist the ignition on your right, bringing the SUV’s engine to life. Next to you, Minho chuckles as he puts his seatbelt on, leaning back on the red-covered seats leisurely. “I don’t want you dying before we get to the Christmas Sale.”

“It’s not like the flea market is on the other side of the country.” He scoffs playfully, laughing even more when you hit him on the shoulder as you place your hand on his headrest while backing the car out of your house’s garage.

“It will be when I throw you across the city if you show me something weird for the exchange gift.” You glare. “This is our first Christmas as a couple and you’re already on thin ice.”

“Oh, boo, I’m so scared.” He rolls his eyes. Opening the car’s glove compartment, he takes out the picture frame he got you from the 2nd grade. It’s supposed to fit the shallow dip on the dashboard but you broke its back support some time ago. “And I don’t give weird gifts for the Secret Santa. Look, you still have a photo of us on the picture frame.”

You glance over his side, sighing in exasperation. “Because my mom said I should at least use it, doesn’t mean I actually like it.”

“You’re wearing the white shirt too.” He points out next. “Basics are in these days, I was ahead of my time back in high school.”

“If you’ll get me a face towel this year—Secret Santa or not—I will actually murder you in front of all our friends this time.”

“That’s hot, babe, I’d like to see you try.”

Minho happily links his free arm with yours as you navigate your way through the tight crowd of last-minute shoppers, his other hand carrying half of your eco bags. Throughout this two-hour trip, he’s shown you countless of weird things on sale as gifts for his friends—from plastic cereal cups that he’ll give to Felix to an actual set of face towels he plans on giving Jisung—but he’s yet to show you what he’s planning to gift you.

Or maybe he already has and just showed it to you under the bluff that he’ll give it to someone else like he did in all those times before.

“Min, we’ve been walking for ten minutes,” You protest as you begrudgingly drag your feet to wherever he’s taking you. Your own arms are about to fall off with your own share of eco bags and the fact that your wallet’s currently a mess with the amount of fast transactions you needed to make is starting to bother you. “Where are we going?”

“We’re almost there, promise!” He assures you with a grin, tugging you closer to his side before you could bump into an old lady walking from the opposite direction. “We’re getting your gift now so be a little patient!”

“Or maybe you’re fucking with me again.” You grumble, making him laugh and shake his head.

“Nope, this one’s only for you.” He assures, pulling you to the right when you reach an intersection. “You’ll see why.”

You only stop walking five minutes later, when Minho drags you to a stall selling pre-order snow globes. The stall owner, a buff middle-aged man, greets Minho and hands him the biggest snow globe on sale in exchange for the money he’s set aside.

“Ah, and this is the person with you on the picture?” The man then asks him once he’s finished paying, turning to you with a polite smile. “You two are adorable! How long now?”

“W-What?!” You stare back incredulously, processing way too slow for the situation.

Clearly, it hasn’t been long since you and Minho started dating, by the way you’re immediately flustered.

“Just a little over six months!” Minho proudly beams, on the other hand, the man laughs wholeheartedly at this.

“Aah, young love.” The stall owner chuckles. Turning to you, he then gestures to the snow glob and adds, “Your boy’s very sweet!”

Only then do you glance down on the snow globe in front of Minho. It has two dolls resembling the two of you surrounded by cats patterned to Minho’s pets and little buildings resembling your most frequented places: the school you went to until high school, the universities you’re currently attending, the library where you spend most of your all-nighters, the hotel you stayed at on your first trip, and this particular flea market you always shop Christmas gifts at.

There’s also the new movie house on the side but, from what you can remember, you haven’t been there yet.

“Is this good enough for you? For a first Christmas at least?” Minho asks with a coy smile, nudging your side and effectively taking you out of your thoughts. He then holds up the snow globe to you, shaking it gently before placing it on your much freer hand. “If you check one side of the globe, there’s the movie house you wanted to visit. I was thinking we could watch a movie right after the Christmas party but, you know, just us.”

You gush at the snow globe, squinting your eyes when you have to glance up at Minho again. “And you’re sure this is mine?”

“It has your name engraved on the bottom, dumbass.” He points out for you, making your eyes widen momentarily. “And it has my name on it too. Put two and two together now.”

“We’re sharing?”

“No, babe, I’m trying to ask you out on a date!”

december 23 (bang chan)

skz of christmas (masterlist)

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@skzwriternet

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