#taekook angst

[tkvkfanfics]

𝐋𝐎𝐕𝐄 𝐈𝐍 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐋𝐈𝐌𝐄𝐋𝐈𝐆𝐇𝐓

ꜱᴜᴍᴍᴀʀʏ ↝ Taehyung was painfully aware of the truth; life was never free. Every decision he made had a consequence, and it seemed clear what price he would have to pay if someone got to know about the true character of his and Jungkook's relationship. However, he had come this far and there was no turning back or throwing it away. Sadly, he wasn't too brave either.

↝ Taehyung's and Jungkook's relationship right under the nose of obviousness.

ᴘᴀɪʀɪɴɢꜱ ↝ taekook, idol⥏ taehyung x idol⥏ jungkook ↝ idol⥏ taehyung x original male character ↝ straight namjoon ↝ namjin, idol⥏ namjoon x idol⥏ seokjin ↝ idol⥏ seokjin x original male character

ʀᴀᴛɪɴɢ ⥏ ᴡᴀʀɴɪɴɢ ↝ mature 18+ ↝ angst, homophobia, explicit sexual content, self-realisation

ᴛᴀɢꜱ ⥏ ɢᴇɴʀᴇ ↝ secret relationship, slow-burn, awkward first times, awkward romance, complicated friendships, taehyung forgets he should play a detective, ↝ idolsAU, BTS 2016

ꜱᴏᴜɴᴅᴛʀᴀᴄᴋ

ʜɪᴅᴅᴇɴ ɪɴ ᴛʜᴇ ɴɪɢʜᴛ

ᴊᴀɴᴜᴀʀʏ 2016

Taehyung wasn't sure for how long he was eyeing the opposite wall while his hands, raised in front of his face, were marking the abstract shadows on the white paint spread in multiple layers over the imperfections under it. As the last rays shone in through the setting sun, the paint appeared to glow in shades of orange and red. He opened up his palm, stretching his fingers so wide that the dry skin around his knuckles, red from the cold, harsh weather, threatened to break, and closed them right away, watching how the thin string of a spider web drew patterns on the back of his hand, reaching past his sleeve and ending in the bending where his forearm met his elbow.

If Taehyung had to list the pros and cons, how strictly professional had Namjoon named them, about their new place with the same set of doors and the colour of their sofa matching the kitchen counters, he would copy Hoseok’s enthusiasm seeping through his big bold letters on the plain paper and drag his pen above the faint lines, writing the word ‘bigger’ right at the begging of the first column. But as soon as everyone would nod, peeking in between his fingers, and looked away, too busy with their own lists and minds, he would place the sharp tip of his pen until the ink wouldn’t leak through, and write, ‘but I liked the small cosy more’.

Taehyung took a deep breath in, filling his nose with the smell of novelty coming from the plastic bags stuck with an easy-to-tear tape to the furniture pilling behind the door of his shared room with Namjoon and reached out his hand even more, until the sleeve of his pyjama top wasn’t brushing over his wrist, showing off his favourite bracelets. If he did the same while surrounded by the paper boxes instead of shelves and cabinets, and pillows instead of chairs, in his old room with two bunk beds, the tips of his fingers would brush past the wood planks over Jimin’s old bed and if he stretched out his legs, snapping the bubbles in his knees, his toes would touch the blankets hanging off the mattress. Taehyung felt an indescribable feeling jerking his legs and arms while he was counting the distance between his and Namjoon’s empty bed.

"At least fifteen Mario figures," thought Taehyung as he ran his eyes over the red shine of the hat the plastic man in blue overall was wearing, while kissing the floor, lying by the leg of the wardrobe that was rattling every time someone in the apartment above decided to run instead of walking. He had never thought the distance of furniture could make him feel so lonely.

The unexpected knock cleared the wrinkle of concentration pulling Taehyung’s eyebrows together in a frown and he turned his head, squinting at the gleam dusting of the night under the gap of his closed door. He let his hand fall, hitting his side before bouncing on the mattress. Taehyung grasped the bed sheets, scratching at the soft fabric with his nails, as if they could send strength to his tired muscles and sighed when his bare soles came into contact with the coldness of the floor.

Another soft knock resonated through the room, pulling a huff out of Taehyung’s mouth before a quiet, but loud enough, travelling on the waves of streaming air, “Hyung?” fell on his ears.

Taehyung was standing at the other side of the wood, blinking at the shadow pushing from the hallways and almost touching his toes, while he stared at his arm, pleading it to lift up and set on the handle under his eyes.

“Are you sleeping?” came a muffled voice and once Taehyung’s sleepy mind recognised its familiarity trying to wave away the fog from his awareness, a lazy smile raised up his cheeks, melting the confusion away.

He pushed open the door, jerking in an alert at the loud creaking jumping from the empty hallways and blending with the swoosh of air that tickled his toes. Taehyung’s eyes fell on the figure preventing him from seeing how the opposite walls kept trembling from the powerful snores escaping from the Seokjin’s room.

Jungkook’s socked feet were stomping a step away from the threshold, blowing away the crumbled up polystyrene, rolling from the boxes full of fragile glass, with every thump of his heels, while his knees were shaking, despite the blanket thrown over his shoulders reaching up to his mid tights. Jungkook pulled the edges of the thin fabric closer together as soon as the draught hit him, they were now touching under his chin and stretching over his back while showing the hard bumps of muscles under the smooth surface.

“Hey,’ Jungkook whispered, ‘Can I go in?” he sniffled and looked at Taehyung’s room wrapped in dark.

Taehyung, pouting at the red tint of Jungkook’s scrunching nose, stepped away and pulled the boy inside, covering him in the familiar night ruling over the safety of his asylum, before closing the door behind them.

As soon as the click of the lock drew a smile on Jungkook’s lips, Taehyung pushed him towards his empty bed until the back of his knees didn’t hit his mattress, prompting him to lose his balance and fall between his messy sheets. A soft laugh resonated in the background of the sharp breath as the air stuck within the confines of Jungkook’s lungs, but before it could reach its full potential and scare the spiders undisturbedly spinning their webs, Taehyung plopped down over his body and trapped the sound inside his own throat as his lips moved against Jungkook’s in a shy peck. He could feel Jungkook’s raising chest under his and the quivering of his abdomen muscles as another laugh pushed past his teeth, slamming against Taehyung’s mouth. Soon, both of them were biting on their lips to restrain their giggles from escaping and waking up the other members sleeping in their rooms.

“Kook,’ Taehyung hid his face in the juncture of Jungkook’s shoulder, kissing the point where the joyful rhythm of his life was pulsating erratically against his cheek, ‘you really need to stop showing up in the middle of the night like this,’ he sighed and hoisted up on palms placed on either side of Jungkook’s body, searching for the maknae’s eyes, ‘You're going to get us caught one day. And you know, the price we pay may be too high.”

“But it's the thrill of it, hyung,’ grinned Jungkook, seemingly unfazed, ‘Besides,’ Taehyung could more feel than hear a hand rising on the side of his body, struggling to keep straight, supported only by his weak arms on the wiggly mattress, ‘being with you is worth it.” Something cold touched the sliver of Taehyung’s skin peeking between his pyjama collar and hair tickled his nape. The shiver didn’t even have time to run down his spine, when that something freezing pressed on his neck and his arms gave up under him. Taehyung fell on Jungkook’s chest, knocking his nose against the sharp bone of his chin.

“Almost,” joked Jungkook and the hot air blew on his exposed forehead. Then two strong arms encircled his waist and lifted him up until their lips didn’t meet once again in the dance they were no longer shy to perform.

Taehyung hummed into the kiss, enjoying the warm feeling spreading in his chest, contrasting with the cold fingers boring into his cheeks, reminding him that their inner peace didn’t walk hand in hand with their bodies subconsciously reacting to the low temperatures portraying the pillows and blanket in a welcoming light.

“You are unfair,” it wasn’t clear if the whine was meant to support his words or if the noise chortling in his throat was a reaction to the lack of hot slicked lips forcing his own to part.

“But you like it. Don’t gimme that look,’ uttered Jungkook, ‘I will leave before Namjoon hyung comes,” he said and stole one last kiss, its wetness squelched not only in Taehyung’s ears but also made him pull away and bring the back of his hand to wipe the saliva dripping down his chin while the hit on Jungkook’s shoulder followed the disgusted grimace pulling the corners of his mouth down.

“How was your evening, Kook?” yawned Taehyung and grabbed the pillow fearing to fall down the edge to let his head bore into the plush softness reminding him of his exhaustion ticking towards the late hour with the fog spreading over his consciousness. He reached for Jungkook’s hand moving up and down on his stomach to the rhythm of his regular breaths and pulled it over his body, only to frown when it didn’t bring him the warmth he was hoping for despite where the naked skin of his palm pressed on his uncovered hip a sweat was forming from the heat. Taehyung wished to pull the offensive top protecting Jungkook’s chest over his head and dive into the tropical waves.

“Good,’ mumbled Jungkook, his eyes rolled back to find his face, ‘Busy, as always, but,’ with a sigh he lifted his legs until they were no longer touching the floor and threw them over Taehyung’s - Taehyung could feel his heels sinking into bed under their weight, ‘now I am with you,” he whispered close to his ear - borrowing the corner of the soft pillow to rest his head on - as if Taehyung’s simple presence could lift the strain of his shoulders.

Taehyung turned his head, the sound of his hair rubbing against the pillow case buried his heavy sigh, “Hey, guess what, Kook-ah?’ he began softly, his lips moving close to the tip of Jungkook’s nose, if someone turned the blinds falling over the window, he would be able to count the freckles rising up as the faded brownish spots on the slope of Jungkook’s nose, they were lying that close, ‘Hyungu hyung invited me over to his place tonight, he cooked some delicious tteokbokki just for Jin hyung and me. Trust me, you missed out on a culinary masterpiece! I wish I could save you the leftovers, but we ate everything,” as he proceeded, his voice carried an exciting tone, almost as if he could imagine himself sitting in the savory filled kitchen.

“Oh?” the dark brush of eyebrows lifted up over Jungkook’s eyes in what had to be a surprise. Taehyung had never mentioned why was he pulling the zipper of his winter jacket up sooner than the others still sweating in front of the mirror tonight.

“How's that going?” Jungkook asked simply, but barely masking the curiosity in his voice. It wasn’t rare for Jin’s boyfriend to call him over dinner, if anything, he liked to push in the gaps of Taehyung’s and Jin’s free period to sneak a chocolate bar or not-so-innocent bag of his favourite snacks into his diet while busying himself with the familiarity of Jin’s presence. Taehyung wasn’t stupid, he was well aware that he served as a cover-up, skipping behind Jin’s back like a wiggly tail every time the familiar ringtone of Jin's phone was followed by a photo of Hyungu's freshly shaved face, gleaming on his lit-up phone screen. But that didn’t mean he wasn’t feeling like a small kid whose mouth could be shut up with a sweet stop to his hunger pangs, that were hitting the walls of his empty stomach, while he was glaring at the couple embracing under the brightest lamp.

“It's…,” Taehyung took a while to think, his excitement suddenly gone. He brought his hand close to Jungkook’s face and traced the curve of his nose, prominently sticking out between his cheeks until he didn’t find the narrow dip close to his cheek bone under his fingertip, “Different,” he said at least.

“I am so glad for them, although maybe not quite as much as Hyungu hyung when he looks at Jin hyung. They look so happy together… But you know, here’s the thing,’ after his finger returned to the middle of Jungkook’s face, copying his nose shape, probably to engrave it into his memory, Jungkook’s eyes met in the middle, watching his hand with a new interest, ‘he told me that Namjoon hyung, that he has been urging him to come out to the company, about their relationship.” Taehyung pressed on the squishy tip until it didn’t lay flat, touching the spot beneath, just above the gentle curve of his lips, and Jungkook’s mouth opened to take the air in. They both were following the movement of Taehyung’s digit hovering over Jungkook’s open mouth and a short stroke of tension ran over them before they coughed and hid their burning cheeks behind their palms.

“Uh… complicated,’ said Jungkook eventually, taking over the line of embarrassing closeness they have not yet chosen to cross, ‘Do you think he will?”

“I am clueless, Kook,’ huffed Taehyung, shaking his head, back on his pillow, ‘Jin hyung is… I guess he is torn. It may be not just about them, he's afraid of what it might mean for all of us, especially,’ he rolled his eyes before finishing, ‘uh, what will be Bang PD-nim's reaction.”

“It's tough, hyung,’ Jungkook was slow to nod, ‘Coming out is never easy, and the industry,’ it seemed that the gulp that bobbed with his throat pushed out the words he had carefully thought about before, ‘can be unforgiving.”

Taehyung sighed, “Who wouldn’t be worried about the consequences?” as the last word rolled out of Taehyung’s tongue, his heart thumped against his ribcage with a striking force, if it wasn’t more careful it would imprint its shape there temporarily.

Taehyung’s ears were ringing in the silence they both fell into, meaningfully filling the gaps with their thoughts, louder than their sealed mouth could ever dare to reveal, muffled by a new feeling, heavier than they were familiar with.

“It's tough, isn't it, hyung?’ Taehyung wondered how Jungkook could speak through the lump in his throat, ‘All this hiding and pretending."

Taehyung felt as if someone had stepped in the middle of his chest and with every breath he tried to take, the sole of the stranger’s shoe had only bored deeper, until the liquid swaying inside wasn’t bumping against its unevenness.

The gaze felt begging, tingling on the side of his face and when he answered it, staring right into the wetness of Jungkook’s eyes, expecting his own self to reflect there, however instead he was flooded with sudden waves of memories falling over his mind. He remembered those days characterised by his self-doubt and insecurities, when his fears built up barriers between his desires as he would steal glances at Jungkook but was quick to punish his heart racing towards dreams he had forbidden himself from seeing. He didn’t like returning to those dark times, especially when they were only a knock of the last hot summer away, when he fought with his identity, struggling to the point it felt like he was drowning. He preferred to hide his face behind a facade, put a mask in front of his true emotions, but it became impossible to conceal them from his mind. More than battling with the fear of societal judgment, he was stabbing his own inner turmoil, but instead of vanishing into non-existence it bled, bled so much it poured into the truth.

Taehyung still felt guilty for pushing Jungkook away, wiping his lips, but they continued to ooze the screaming red. But Jungkook had never given up on himself - if Taehyung felt selfishly daring, he would say on them - coming clean and risking a heartbreak. Now, as they lay together in the quiet of Taehyung’s room, he couldn't help but feel a relieving sense of gratitude for the love that had brought them under his blanket.

Their relationship started as a delicate one, catching Taehyung off guard every time he spotted Jungkook’s eyes in the mirror, communicating through the gentle blinks brushing past their cheeks in the mass of other faces, blind to the blush rising on their skin. It all bubbled inside his stomach like the first love, and maybe it really was, on the background of stolen kisses in the dimly lit corners of their practice room, or hidden behind the door of a cubicle, breathing in the sickly reek of toilets, while busy lost in each other’s eyes. But as their love had grown, so had the challenges they faced. The entertainment industry was unforgiving, and the pressure to conform to its expectations weighed heavily on their shoulders. Taehyung knew that Jin’s dilemma about coming out to the company was just a reflection of the larger struggle they all faced.

“Yeah, Kookie, it is. But you know what? It is the path we've chosen, at least for the time being.” Taehyung rubbed his eyes, clearing the sleep filling their corners with his fists. He was momentarily enjoying the lack of grey shadows seeping through, while the wetness spread behind the eyelids eased the itching sensation painting the milky surface faint red.

When Jungkook’s hand grazed along his covered belly, he jerked, not anticipating it, but nuzzled closer until his bent knees didn’t poke the curve of Jungkook’s waist. “I just,’ he could hear Jungkook smack his lips, they had to be just a thin line dipping the corners of his mouth now, ‘wish we didn't have to sneak around like this. It's exhausting,” the whisper sounded on the border of a cry, coping his exasperation.

As Taehyung’s fingers gently stroked Jungkook's hair, he spoke softly, 'I know,’ he spoke more bravely than he felt inside, ‘But remember why we're doing this. We're protecting our love and the group."

Jungkook's sigh filled the room and his voice carried a familiar longing, "I get it, hyung, I do. It's just... sometimes I wish we could be open about us,” he confessed, his grip on Taehyung's fingers tightened, as if not wanting to let go.

Taehyung felt his heart swell with affection and concern, wishing he could offer Jungkook a solution rather than more worries. "I am with you on that, Jungkook,’ he nodded, his voice strained with the weight of their shared burden, ‘But we can't risk it. What if someone catches on? What if they already have?"

Jungkook's arm wrapped around him, drawing him closer, their bodies once again finding comfort in the closeness of their embrace. "Hey, don't worry,’ Jungkook reassured him, his nose tracing the contours of Taehyung's shoulder. He pulled away slightly, allowing a cool rush of air between them. "We've been careful, and Jin hyung is on our side. And if someone does suspect anything,’ his voice gained a newfound strength, as if he was trying to convince both Taehyung and himself, ‘we'll deal with it together, just like we always do."

Taehyung remained silent for a long moment. His fingers were lightly tracing the lines on Jungkook's palm as if he could uncover their future lying in the complex of webs spiralling and tying together into others, but it stayed the same, uncertain. The dread of exposure weighed heavily on him.

“I wish it was a truth,” Taehyung’s lips wrapped around the words but no sound vibrated within his throat.

Taehyung found himself too caught up in the approaching storm, roaring behind the mountains of the future. He stretched his neck to see how far were the fortresses built of pretence that the thunderbolt was setting ablaze, before it hammered on the front door and unleashed where the peace in his life was currently ruling. However, he was only met with the same uncertainty in two eyes watching him, sliding down his cheek. Taehyung’s heavy breath of non-spoken wants spread before their senses of perception, perhaps fogging into the hard-to-see-through mist falling over the room’s midnight shadows, playing with their memories responsive to new-found desires for the alone time together, that they have forgotten about the second bed’s empty mattress and the pillows fluffed against the headrest, winking at them just behind it.

The next time Taehyung reached to rub the sleep away from his eyes, to continue strolling towards what looked to be an infinite night, he found them swollen with a satisfying rest, same as the state of his mind, while lying on the pillow that impressed the fabric lines into the pliant skin of his cheek, with the half of Jungkook’s body thrown over his, in the new day’s rays absorbed room.  And his heart dropped with the sound of huffing coming from his left. Taehyung’s chest felt tense and the muscles in his neck screamed the protests, even going as far as pulling at the sensitive nerve ending, making him to hiss in pain.

Taehyung felt caught red-handed staring right into Namjoon’s eyes, watching him from behind the glasses set on his nose, while he was sitting on his bed. Namjoon brought his index finger to his mouth and stuck out his tongue to wet its surface before the dampness glued it onto the page of the book he was reading. The quiet rustling of a paper must have visited Jungkook’s dreams because he stirred in Taehyung’s arms.

“Hyung?’ gulped Taehyung, ‘Good morning?” he wasn’t sure why the tone of his voice kept rising into the questions. He tried to understand Namjoon’s expression, but it appeared unreadable, hardening around his mouth corners yet with an empty glint in his eyes. As Jungkook shifted again, blowing a snore over his bare neck and raising a panic slowly climbing up from behind Namjoon’s eyebrow raise, he quickly came up with an excuse, ‘We… uh, we were just playing some games last night,’ the way a drop of sweat shone on his forehead had presented him in a guilty light, ‘and I guess we fell asleep?”

The second eyebrow, resting low over Namjoon’s eyelids till now, joined the first one, pulling at the skin, high, close to his hairline. Taehyung attempted an awkward smile but inside he was freaking out. Were they too obvious?

Namjoon’s pursed lips enhancing his noticeable silence continued to play on Taehyung’s anxiety. His mouth opened subconsciously while his teeth found sank into the plush of his bottom lip, tugging at the old habits in nervousness.

Namjoon’s gaze shifted once again between Taehyung’s flush rising on his pale face and Jungkook’s furrowed eyebrows while his dreams were slowly meeting their end. He closed the book with a loud thud, spreading the musty smell of old pages, and nodded simply before getting up and leaving the room without saying a word.

As soon as Namjoon’s wide bare back disappeared behind the closed door, Taehyung’s head fell. He ran his eyes over Jungkook’s black tangled strands, seeping the aroma of shampoo all over his pyjama top, while his hand fisted the creased loose fabric around the hem.

“Jungkook-ah,’ whispered Taehyung, his voice still hoarse, brushing over Jungkook’s hair, ‘wake up,” he tapped his shoulder, but the boy’s fingers only tightened around his T-shirt, baring his stomach.

“C’mon.”

“Mmm…’ grunted Jungkook, ‘five mo-ah,’ his mouth stretched around a yawn and his hot breath tickled Taehyung around his navel, ‘five more minutes, Tae,” he mumbled, forgetting about honorifics in the state of half-sleep. Jungkook turned his head so his nose was boring in the gap between his ribs now.  

“Jungkook-ah, it’s important,’ Taehyung spoke louder this time, sounding more urgently, ‘Wake up, now!” he shook him by his shoulders.

“Huh?’ Jungkook’s lips parted before his eyelids raised, smoothing the skin over his rolling eye whites, ‘What’s going on, Tae?” he yawned again and squinted lazily at Taehyung’s face.

“It's about Namjoon hyung, I think he knows something,’ he hurried to answer, checking the closed door after he thought he heard a movement somewhere close, creaking on their floor.

“Wake up.”

Jungkook ruffled his hair, combing his finger through the knots around the crown of his head. “Namjoon hyung?’ he asked, sounding confused, ‘What do you mean?” a painful hiss escaped between his teeth when he pulled at the untamed hair more harsher than he intended. Taehyung reached out and even if overwhelmment spread into his arm as hot blood traveled to his numb from disuse fingers, he ran them through Jungkook’s messy locks.

“You shouldn’t have stayed here last night,” Taehyung began but before he could voice out his concern, he was stopped short by a voice just a few steps away from where they were lying under the sheets, “Hyu-, oh… um,” Jimin mumbled, his foot lingering between Taehyung's room and the hallway. Taehyung watched the slipper slipping off Jimin's toes in the same awkward manner as his eyes were shifting between Jungkook's guilty face and his.

“Jimin hyung,” Jungkook smiled nervously while his fingers circled around Taehyung's wrist trying to pull his hand away from his hair. Jimin's chin jerked as his eyes followed the not so subtle movement.

“Jungkookie, good morning,' Jimin nodded curtly in acknowledgement, pointedly ignoring Taehyung's burning gaze, 'Have you seen Namjoonie hyung?” his words carried an underlying tension that seemed to fill the air around them.

Taehyung noticed Jungkook's chest lifting as he expanded his lungs with the answer, but before it could bubble on his tongue, Taehyung spoke up, “He's not here,' he said sternly, 'Maybe check the living room,” his tone was icy but he couldn't deny the annoyance that rose up his throat as he watched Jimin's head twitching towards him but never meeting his eyes.

Despite the smoke of irritation spiralling out of his fuming nostrils, Jimin couldn’t pretend he had plugs stuffed inside his ears. His face was twisted with frustration and his jaw tightened as soon as Taehyung cleared his throat. He grunted a reluctant, “Thanks,” before kicking into his slipper until it didn't slide back on his foot and he stomped out of the room. The obvious scoff bounced from the walls seconds after he left, among other voices bowing him a greet in the hallway.

As soon as Jimin vanished from the sight, Taehyung became aware of the unvocalized words gulped down by Jungkook’s throat or bitten down by Jungkook’s tongue and one sharp intake of air was enough for him to cut through the possibility with a swish of raising hand to let them be heard.

“Don’t-”

“Hyung, talk to Jimin already,’ however, Jungkook's voice was a wrecking ball that tore down all of Taehyung's flimsy attempts, like a hurricane breaking down all of his efforts, ‘You’ve been avoiding him for too long.”

‘Too long’ perfectly described the passed time since his last year’s late night New York escapade, maybe too perfectly, sighed Taehyung. He couldn’t remember when was the last time Jimin’s smile didn’t turn bitter when he caught Taehyung’s gaze during the group meetings held to discuss their ‘America success- winter 2015’. It was not a secret, at least not for Jungkook, as Taehyung spent the majority of their late night talks complaining about Jimin and Jimin only, that when Jimin turned his back towards the open door and rather had chosen the already crowded room, Taehyung took it personally. “Hyung can be pretty petty if he wants,” Jungkook gave him a look.

“I know,’ Taehyung lowered his eyes, ‘but I'm scared, Kook,’ he hesitated for a moment, ‘Scared that it might be too late.”

Jungkook stared intensely, a mix of emotions on his face, from frustration to concern and sadness. "The longer you stay quiet, the harder it'll be, Tae hyung," he said firmly.

[ilmyg1221]

Title: im fine, save me Author: inyeon_dee - Days after attending the funeral of a schoolmate, Taehyung finds himself back six months. He believes he was given a mission to try and prevent Jeon Jungkook's suicide but how can he do that when they aren't even talking? He has no answer to that yet but hey, at least he gets his quizzes perfect now.

/OR Taehyung time travels to the past to save Jungkook from killing himself but they are not friends/

-

[hollyhomburg]

Before I Leave You (Pt.70)

(Omegaverse au, Mafia au, Bts x Reader)

Summary: The one where the pack goes on a group bender. 

Tags: Fluff, only a little hurt mostly just comfort, scenting, bathing, drinking, drunk characters, recovery from past abused, nightmares, trans! tae, dress up, girl on girl fluff, omegaspace, themes of forgiveness, vomiting, eating disorder mention but everything's good, Brief implied sexual content, Talks of mental disorders, murder,

W/c: 12.6k

Note: The part where it links to a playlist on youtube may be a little distracting if you do not like to read with loud music on! feel free to skip it and then go back to listen to it <3 although it is not the first song in the playlist- hot to go by chappell roan is the unofficial official song of the chapter <3

Previous part - Masterlist - First part

The pack spends the next three days getting drunk off their asses and trying their hardest to forget the last 3 weeks. Everything since you and Hobi found that body at the beach all those weeks ago.

There are no police officers at the door, no red and blue lights that cloud the air, or tense words spat between you. No plans devilish or delightful. Sometimes there are thin bands of sunlight that slip through the blinds and that's a big event. Other times- the big kitchen light shines brighter than any sun. Daytime and nighttime blend and blur together until you’re not sure what day it is or how many days it’s been since all of you became free.

Freedom. It feels like a dirty word.

Young, drunk, and honest, the days blend together. Drinking away the last few weeks might not be the best move, neither the healthiest nor the most productive decision to drink yourselves dizzy until it doesn’t matter that there’s a person buried in your basement, that Jin shot Jimin, or that you almost left them. The truth of love is clean compared to what you might do, what you have done- for the people you love.

For once no one judges, no one cuts you off after one or three or five drinks because it's too much for a pup like you. No one even stops Jungkook from getting giggly from champagne and drinking more than his seizures would normally allow. You deserve it, a few nights of fun, a few nights to live like the 20-somethings that you all are without the weight of trying to survive and secrets weighing you down.

It’s okay, if Jungkook has a seizure that will be the least of your worries.

The hours blend and blur. Jin submits his resignation paperwork for the FBI and has a quick video call with the director, the rest of the pack tries to be quiet but fails several times (once when namjoon pops a bottle of champagne and hits himself in the face with a flying cork, and again when he and Yoongi clink their glasses and predictably break them on accident sending champagne all over the floor. it's not the first glass that breaks that night but it is the first one that makes Jin laugh.)

You and Jungkook lay sprawl across his lap, just out of sight and giggling every few minutes. nuzzling under Jin's shirt to scent his sensitive stomach. Your fingers play with Jungkook's on Jin's hips, and you teeth listlessly at the soft skin just above his belly button, just so that you don't speak or let out an embarassingly needy whine. His hands and long fingers card through your hair and shushing your laughter just barely. Jin doesn't have the heart to tell anyone not to laugh, especially after the last few days no- Jin will drink down every bit of it.

The glass of very good and expensive wine in his hands just out of view of the camera lens, also gets drunk down, and very quick. Yoongi pauses to refill it once Jin's done, he drinks the second glass slower.

Hobi and Namjoon fill out their paperwork for emergency rut leave. Jimin doesn’t have to, already on emergency medical leave and cleared for his bodyguard job till the end of the month when spring will turn the ground lucid and heavy sweet. The winter won't be long now, although the cold pushes at the window and makes Yoongi put the thermostat up high just so that you can all lounge around in your pajamas and fuzzy socks.

Heat and rut leave, even though no one's in a rut or heat. You don't mind lying and abusing the system just this once. You just can’t think about leaving the house just yet. You need a few days to settle all of your instincts and remember that being alive- that surviving is a good thing. That surviving and being together is even better.

It feels like a good thing. It feels like this is the first deep breath you’ve taken in a long long while. Since long before Yoongi maybe- if you’re being honest.

You know you must be irritating your neighbors with the music- but it’s worth it when you get to sit on the counter and watch Yoongi and Hobi bicker over the playlist. Which song is better, which one has the better backtrack, the better lyrics, and the better vibe.

A big black block speaker sits on the kitchen island bumping and although Hoseok and Yoongi might be fighting, they're leaning further into each other with every over-exaggerated scoff like a pair of magnets. it might be midnight, it might be 4am, but no ones sleeping yet. you know too well what waits you when you close your eyes. The nightmares that will plauge all of you, so you keep them open.

It's kinda fun to watch them flirt, It's kinda your favorite thing to watch actually. sitting there on the counter sipping at your drink.

You stay close to Hobi just incase. He hasn't showed any sort of evidence of falling apart from seeing moonbyul yet, but you're ready and waiting if he needs you.

The long socks you wear have trouble staying up to your mid-thigh, thick and cozy, and falling down around your knee as you sit on the countertop, feet dangling and swinging as you look between Hobi and Yoongi. Jimin toys with them, pulling up and pulling down. Happy with the sensation of it. He's equally as entertained by the way that Yoongi and Hobi fight, half joking- half really not.

After the kind of fights you've had recently, you'll take it.

“Fuck you and your love for fucking tambourines- this song is not that good-” Your feet swish and Hobi bens in to peck your forehead and sneak a sip of your drink. You like them sweet and Jin's made each one extra sugary for you.

You don't know where Jin got the mini paper umbrellas from- but Hoseok has a red one tucked behind his ear and a green one in his drink, the same as your yellow one. They litter the kitchen counter along with the juiced rinds of lemons and limes and other mixers that the pack is chasing with their alcohol.

"Oh! Try it Tae, this is like- so you and so so pink" Tae tries your drink too, bending down to sip at it counter level and you watch Jimin swallow hard and fidget. he's so enthralled with the sight of her bending over and sucking that he misses her sneaky hand creeping around to his backside, pinching so hard he jumps.

Hoseok laughs and then does the same to Yoongi. "Oh my god what the fuck-" He's indignant, but Hoseok tugs him back to his side by his belt buckle.

Tae's eyes are nearly comically wide, she asks you what you're drinking, hand on your knee, fiddling with the ribbon on your socks. “I’ve never had a Miami vice before.”

Jimin’s growl is a near thing, a near purr, makes you giggle and tip into him, happy. “I’ll make you one babygirl.”

"Wait!" Tae snags Jimin around the waist before he sinks off to get her one, and even you can see the blush on his cheeks. It's a good sign, Jimin is recovering well from all the blood he lost.

"Help me sit on the counter first?"

Jimin had in fact, heaved you up there when you'd asked to sit, not that you couldn't get up there on your own- but the alpha’s like to do little things like that for you. Tae can definitely do it herself too but Jimin stoops to grip under her thighs, eye contact with her never ceasing, and almost drops her when she takes the chance to kiss him fully on the mouth and you giggle again.

Yoongi glances over at you, at the sound, and your giggle cuts off. cheeks the mirror of Jimin's.

The discomfort passes like it was never there, like he didn't look for the sound, like he's not keenly aware of just how many steps it would take to cross the room and kiss you firmly on the mouth. Yoongi's thinking all sorts of silly things like that.

It's not silly, it's not silly at all- Yoongi is just not quite sure how angry he is.

Yoongi’s all puffed up, swaying but somehow holding onto his whiskey. The counter digs into his hip where he leans and flips his hair like he doesn't know that Hobi's watching. Like Hobi's not biting his lip and staring. It's easier to look at Hobi than it is to look at you- easier to want Hobi than it is to want you right now. Easier to bicker and flirt than to actually initiate anything.

(Yoongi never did like sex or love when he's drunk, he's only ever loved love sober, drinking makes him- stumbly- less articulate than he likes, more rambly. Like his body and his mind are at two seperate tempo's and they won't mix).

“Like you’re any better with your fucking cowbell fixation. It does not add that much to a track."

“Hey! I am a millennial thank you very much, that was like such a meme when I was in high school- like people had shirts with that on it” 

their bickering is funny and it’s so much nicer than almost drowning, than fighting. Jimin’s stitches are still tender but you burrow into the front of his chest, hiding your face from view. Peeking over his shoulder to watch Yoongi and Hobi. 

Your mate tips his head, spits it almost vicious and slurry, “And I bet you had one of those fucking shirts, You and your fucking memes, just because a song has cowbell in it doesn't make it a good song-” 

Hoseok grins, teeth sharp looking and smelling so heady and rich that you tip your neck to the side, presenting your scent gland for Jimin and Tae to burrow into, between the two of them in a alpha sandwich. 

"You thinking about my shirt hyung? It's made of boyfriend material you know." 

Jin laughs from the couch in approval and tae groans but Yoongi's hand tangles with the front of Hoseok's shirt, black, generic. Pulling him closer so harshly that hoseok genuinely looks startled for a second. "I am thinking about your shirt- how it would look on my fucking floor." 

Jungkook swishes around his Miami vice from the couch, calling over to your little cuddle puddle, "Does anyone know what they're talking about?" 

Jin pipes up, almost undistinguishable from where he's pressed between Joonie and the couch cushion. "Are they angry at each other or trying to fuck?"

"Both?" 

"Both." 

You sigh at the same moment Tae nearly swoons, "Let them be."

"It's sort of hot to watch them argue," you agree.

“You and your fucking memes” Yoongi spits again, half a laugh, so in love that he purses his lips to keep from saying it and ruining the (admittedly fake) argument.

He pushes hoseok up agains the center island, lips colliding with his so sloppy and yet with so much love behind them that you see Hobi's knees go weak a little, watch your mates lips work in the way you are only too familiar with blushing and still peeking. As Hoseok's red hair mizes with Yoongi's black and Hoseok kisses back with just as much tension, finally snapping. Yoongi's hands on his hips. Kissing just to kiss. Pulling apart with a laugh because,

"Did you just fucking bite me?"

"And i'll do it again if you don't admit that my song is better than yours." They go back to kissing, and no one pays them heed.

Jimin’s scent swells sweeter and Tae touches the top of your head, long fingers threading through and long nails scratching gently behind your ears. 

"Feeling small pup?" She asks, all quiet and fond with it. Prepared to wisk you away upstairs or into the library room if you need a second of quiet, a second of less stimulation so settle you. you're a little quiet, a little less verbal- something she's come to expect from you in omegaspace.

You shake your head, words escaping you, eyes stuck on her fluffy sweater, the kind of mohair that leaves a pretty white halo, her shorts are more bloomers, ruffled at the hem and dove colored, the same color as your socks. Coordinating. Tae dressed you and she wanted couples outfits. Your hands fix on her sweater sleeves and you pet them once, twice, still shaking your head. 

"You sure?" Tae's lips quirk and you know that she doesn't believe you in the slightest. You press a kiss to her lips, slow soft, near reverent with how gentle you are with it. Her pupils dilate, and Jimin's' growl rumbles all the way to your fingertips.  

"M'okay, just a little sleepy but not like- sleepy sleepy yet." it is nearing 3 in the morning. Jimin's arms tighten around you protective and a little possessive, Tae's eyes go from your face to his. Apparently, she's learned a thing or two from Yoongi and Hobi because her tone is dripping with false displeasure.

“Stealing my pup from me Minnie?” She taunts, and you shiver at the sound of her voice, low, the most normal it’s sounded in days. You’d almost forgotten what it sounded like when Tae teased.

Jimin seems to have forgotten too, because he doesn't seem to understand that she's teasing, bullying you, nearly pushing you further into her with how quick he seeks to hand you over.  “Never.” He says softly, quietly. Like every syllable she says is treasured. It is. 

“Hey!” Jin flops over the edge of the couch. Jungkook and Namjoon near his feet. All but kissing up his thighs. Namjoon says something low and Jungkook giggles, almost tossing himself into the pack alpha’s shoulder. “Hey! If anyone is anyone’s pup, they’re- hic- mine!” 

Jin only manages to be serious for a second before he flinches, laughing and hiccuping again as Namjoon’s fingers dig into the meat of his heal. A carefully orchestrated reminder as the pack omega squirms and shrieks at the ticklish feeling. Swaying and almost toppling from the couch. You don’t think you’ve seen Jin look so young, act so young- in weeks. He ends up on the floor with Jungkook on top of him, blowing raspberries against his neck with a loud rippling noise. 

Your hands are healing slowly and Hobi’s bruises around his neck are beginning to yellow. The bruises on the back of Tae’s head have faded from painful to touch tender. You touch her there, oh so gently. Touching her hair as she touches yours, leaning into each other and giggling, touching, loving gently. Jimin watches blinking owlishly. Fingers flexing on the countertop.

Other wounds have faded that way too. Yoongi scoffs and turns to you. They've been lost in their own little world. Yoongi has his long hair in a top knot, his white teeshirt is so long it almost hides his shorts below. If basketball shorts could be coquettish- Yoongi would pull it off. The loose pieces of his hair fluff softly over his forehead as he huffs. 

“Okay. You can be the tiebreaker- which one’s better? This one or the song I showed earlier?”

Both of them look at you expectantly- watching and waiting, Tae curls a lock of your hair around her finger syrupy slow as you pause for a second. You turn to Yoongi already apologetic, “Okay- but Russian house music is like- kinda really really cool-” 

Your mate groans and all but smacks his head on the counter. “Oh come on!” Hoseok pumps his fist and almost hip-checks Yoongi across the kitchen. Your mate pouts, crossing his arms.

“Come on- epic high is a classic.” 

“Admit it hyung- she likes my playlist better than yours.”

At least Yoongi is sort of talking to you again. Sort of getting over it minute by minute. It’s hard. Namjoon watches you from where he's sprawled on the couch, holding a near-empty bottle of champagne by the neck while Jungkook and Jin wrestle on the floor, sort of making out, sort of scenting each other as they go. Jimin requests a song that Tae would like- and then Yoongi and Hoseok lean over Yoongi's phone to make her the perfect playlist. Happy to have something new and mundane to bicker over.

(Happy Pink Pup Time ▷ Play playlist?)

Morning is just cresting over the rooftops and the music is just turned down when Namjoon gets up from the couch, slowly, dizzy. You're perched on the counter in your pj's watching Jimin and Jungkook chase each other around the room. The need to scent and wrestle and get all your restless energy out near palpable.

Hoseok and Jungkook have a tiny paper drink umbrella tucked behind their ears, the same one that Jin stuck in your drinks so that you can keep track of whose drink is whose. He and Jungkook gang up on Jimin to stick one into his hair, the tiny little baby bun that Tae tied to match Yoongi.

You giggle as Jungkook gives up and just loops his arms around Jimin's neck, no technique to it and all body weight dragging the three of them to the floor. Sprawled next to the library room door, now open. Tae’s makeup collection spread out on the green shaggy carpet like the fallen petals of some red flowering tree. Nothing hidden in the room anymore, the lock will go unused forever. 

It changes from wrestling to tickling and then the three of them are getting up and surrounding Yoongi, a paper umbrella in their fingers, he takes it all with a huff and a surprisingly whiney, “guys.” 

You still when Namjoon walks over, the same way you'd still if a wild animal were approaching. He doesn't settle close, just stands next to you and pours himself the last melted bit of the drink in the blender. Pink and yellow swirling delicately. He makes a noise in his throat and looks at you like he hasn’t barely said a word to anyone in the whole last 24 hours, hasn’t barely said a word to you since you got off the phone with him and Moonbyul left the house. 

You sip at your drink, lips pursed around the straw and when you're done, Namjoon takes it from you and puts it on the counter. You think at first that he might be cutting you off but then he stares at the gauze around your hands.

"I should probably check these." You nod obedient, wordless, unsure what to say, you let him take your hands. 

Fingers prodding at the red skin, delicate but knitting itself together slowly. “How much do they hurt?” He asks. Eyes downturned, looking at them, not you. 

“Probably a two,” you rate, almost without thinking. His eyelashes still cling together from salt. Face glossy. You want to wash his face, blot across his cheeks gently the way that Jin does after you've been crying (something that you admittedly do a lot- the pack's resident crybaby). 

Namjoon sighs heavily, "So should I consider that a four or-" 

"No, this time I'm being honest." Namjoon stills, "It doesn't hurt when I touch stuff unless I'm not careful." Being honest about your hurts and pains has never been easy for you. But Namjoon has shown you time and time again that he's willing to take your hurts and fix them. You have no reason not to tell him the truth. 

Namjoon grips your palm, turning it over his hands again and again, looking down at your love line lifeline all tangled there before leveling you with a look that is neither angry nor resigned.

He holds your hand, “Do you notice?” He asks. You swallow, eyes itchy. 

“Notice what?” His finger presses to the center of your palm, the hollow there. 

“Still dry,” He says. 

You think of the mice. Of drowning. You don't pull your hand from  Namjoon's grasp, but you know he wouldn't Let you anyway. 

You think about the mice. Of dying. Of trying to stay dry despite the things that try to swallow you whole. Water is not gentle, water is hungry. The rain pitters against the dark glass and melts the snow outside. But you and Namjoon and the rest of the pack are dry and warm and safe in here. 

Your breath hitches, but you close your fingers around his hand and nod. Your heels hook around the back of his knees, pulling him closer to you. “Still dry.” You agree. 

Namjoon closes his eyes and breaks the tension and this distance between you. Letting you pull him between your thighs properly where you sit on the kitchen counter. Wrapping his arms around your shoulders to tug you to his chest, and breathing deep in the hollow of your throat. 

He pulls back just as abruptly. Hands resting on the counter on either side of your thighs. All up in your space and sour-smelling. It takes great effort for you not to turn away and keep his piercing eye contact. 

“Don’t do something like that again. Ever.” His jaw rolls and his scent spikes angry. But it's all temporary as you nose under his jaw to soothe him. Namjoon has every right to be angry with you for leaving, the same way Yoongi does. 

“Never. Promise.” You hold out your pinky and you mean it. 

Namjoon looks at you for a second, staring you down, waiting for you to look away. But then after a pregnant second, he loops his pinky through. 

~-~

Eventually, you get drunk enough to play dress up with Tae’s collection of designer clothes. You wake up sleepy and pupish, Namjoon and Jungkook guide you to the dressing room before youre really awake.

"Sorry to wake you, Tae just needed-" you make a sleepy soft noise, nuzzling into Namjoon's throat when they hand him off to you.

Instead of getting pulled into pajamas you get Tae and the dressing room, almost her whole collection of dresses taken out of their careful organization. piles and piles of clothes on the floor, and a silk scarf keeps her hair back from her face.

Gold eye patches on her under eyes that slide off when Jin tries to drag her in for a morning scent mark to soothe her. Tae's anxious, you can smell it on the air, distracting and sharp, you squirm and Namjoon sets you on the floor. "Sorry pup, Tae's just-"

Tae's cheeks were wet, frustrated holding a slip in her hands. sniffling softly. She'd looks at you a little guilty, looking down at you in the middle of her tornado and nearly burst into tears,

"I don't have anything to wear."

Hugging Tae is always so easy, easier when she needs your comfort. you're sleepy, but this is something you'd know how to do even in your sleep- loving her properly has always been so easy. Jimin stands silent and fidgety in between the hollow of her closet obviously having handed her dress after dress to try and soothe her.

"Jimin, give me that dress and that Crinolin."

"The blue one?"

"The one thats purple and pink, stat." You know better than to think this is just Tae having nothing to wear, this is dysphoria, the way it clings to her shoulders, makes her turn away from the mirrors. You straighten up and turn to your pack in the door each of them standing at attention.

"Namjoon, go downstairs and bring me up the case that's under Tae's makeup vanity, not next to it, the one under it. It's got her favorites." You turn to Hobi, "find Noodle, she needs a cat in her lap asap."

Tae sniffles, wiping her cheeks, grimacing but then admitting, "a cat would help."

They scatter. "What should I do?" Yoongi asks, rubbing the back of his neck with his hands.

You pause, hover. But Yoongi waits, willing to be ordered around. "you could make us a drink?"

Of course, you don't need to be drunk to play dress up on a good day, it's just that Tae needed a bit of liquid courage after Moonbyul's words, you expect that they've gotten under her skin a little more than she's let on. But if that's under her skin, you're happy to help her put something more fitting over it.

Skirts of tulle and beaded flowers and stars that glitter brighter than the whole sky. Fancy tambour embroidery that must be worth its weight in gold. Pulled gently, mother-of-pearl buttons get stuck in your hair. Expensive draping and diamond collars stitched high against scented throats. Velvet bows and metal boning are hidden by the softest silk.

It's fun to be a girl sometimes, most of the time. Especially when your alphas ask for you to twirl for them.   Which is how Namjoon ends up breaking the lamp by your couch by tripping over the floor-length bright pink dress that Tae’s put you in. fluffy tiers of it, bright and flamingo pink. Tae's feeling alot better now, after you'd done her makeup and let her swatch colors of lipstick up and down your arms. Let her choose your outfit and change you a dozen times to find the right dress for you.

You'd done the same with her, you'd put her in the red dress and blushed, and immediately asked her to change. And had pointedly not looked at the delicate daisy print bralette she wore under it, the white and yellow flowers that did everything for her skin.

You remember when that bralet was just hidden in her makeup room. Remember when she'd never worn it, too risky, too much of a confession to the nature of her soul underneath. When it had stayed just there- hidden in the library room, ready to be savored. Now- the yellow on the straps wears off white instead of lemony and you pull them up her shoulders, a kiss to the spot where it sits on her shoulders.

Hoseok sits on the edge of the couch- because all of them had tried and failed to fit on the pink tufted bench upstairs in the dressing room almost breaking it so you had to relocate back to the first floor. Hoseok buries his face in your hip, disappearing into the pink glittery fabric. Laughing and smiling up at you. "You should wear this all the time, you look like a fucking peony,"

"That would be like so impractical." Hobi's cheeks are dotted with kiss prints, "if you want to put makeup on me you better kiss it on" he'd teased, getting drunk quicker than the rest. his cheeks have several small kiss prints four from Tae and five from you.

All of you bear her touch, either by kisses on your cheeks, pink and mauve, or by the glitter that tae's demanded you all wear. You’ve giggled and dotted it across their cheeks to match. Tae has a lot of glitter to go through in her makeup collection, more than she ever logically will in her lifetime or even before they expire. It's okay to use them now.

She sits with Jin, the pack omega's arms full of swatches the same way yours were all those months ago, as Tae explains the merits of each and Jin chooses which glitter he wants on his cheeks. The reflects in this one that's green, not purple- or the pink one with extra little heart glittery bits- her favorite. Jin listens on an astute student, Jimin close at his hip, absorbing her words like they're gospel.

They are gospel. After spending the last few days debating survival strategies- debating glitters is so much better.

Jin lets Tae put his on (white, with extra chunky stars) while you put some on Namjoon's cheeks (champagne colored, almost translucent with how it blends into his skin) and Jimin’s fingers draw idle circles over Tae's back. Between the velvet ribbons that crisscross and tie her corset.

Tae's corset is a deep plumb, but the color of her silk dress fades to pink around her waist and then gauzy white on the floor. Her red toenails are only visible when she sways, "Minnie i'm ticklish there." Jimin just growls in response. Half a pur and half a plea.

Are the others thinking about it like you are? Thinking about Tae in a big white dress, a veil across her face? Are they thinking about how lovely she looks in white? Or how much they'd like to see her in a white dress for them? Just like you are?

Namjoon leans close, between your thighs too. All of them- all of your packmates sit in a line across the couch, ready to be glittered and made up because Tae had requested it. Doing all of their makeup. They'd been so willing, so loving about it. They'd even washed their faces and you'd gotten to clean the salt from Namjoon's cheeks just like you'd wanted. But now-

Now the 4th finger on your hand hums sensitive, Tae has glitter across her knuckles. You haven't thought about your wedding ring since you took it off, and haven't thought about marriage at all. Jimin well- Jimin will be Tae's mate- same way you're Yoongi's. But Tae's ring finger is empty, she doesn't wear a lot of jewelry but-

You don't think about your wedding alot, not at all really. Such a brief little bit of time that started easily the worst time in your life, but you remember the feeling of the dress, tight on your hips- how you couldn't move a full step without help.

Hoseok burrows into the fluff at your hip, really- it must have taken a mile or two of tulle to make a skirt so poofy. It sort of feels like you're wearing a cloud. With Tae's ribcage size and your chest- most of her dresses fit you comfortably. This one is probably the closest, and Tae chose it for you.

Tae chose it for you.

You sneak furtive glances over at Tae while you do Namjoon's makeup. Not much, just a bit of eyeliner and mascara for his sparse lashes. He looks up at you from the couch, eyeliner on one eye, almost masculine in the way it makes his eyes look sharper and dragon like. Concealer for the bags under his eyes.

"Your scent went a little sour then sweet, what were you thinking about?" You continue to put it on him, pat pat pat- quiet for a moment where you choose your words.

"I was thinking about my wedding dress."

Hoseok quiets where he's still burrowing into your hip, maybe more a little alpha-puppyish than you've seen him. You don't blame him, the stress of yesterday has you needing a bit of omegaspace yourself. Your back and shoulders all tense in the way that only ever relaxes when you're brought low and sweet by their care.

But not now- not tonight- maybe tomorrow you'll indulge in omegaspace. Tonight, none of you will sleep or be sensitive just in case something bad happens. Just in case Moonbyul's promises were too good to be true. It might be a good night (verging on morning) but none of you trust the quiet. The rain still pittering on outside. Creaking under the doors with cold damp fingers.

Namjoon's fingers dig warm into the spot under your thighs, the squishy bit of skin between your knees and your mid-thigh. Under the dress but firm, keeping you there in the moment and not sinking back through your memories. 

Hobi's eyes are shiny when they look up at you, pinching a bit of the pink tulle between his thumb and forefinger. "What was getting married like? What did you wear for your wedding dress?" Was it everything you dreamed of or could you want that dream again. Who would you want that with, could it be me?

(Hoseok won't have to wonder for long, although he will be disappointed, just a little)

"It was so- so not me- I'd much rather have worn something like this." The dress might be a monstrous concoction of tulle but it's still so cute- so much more- you than anything Geumjae ever put you in.

"Getting married was kinda a blur, alot of people, a lot of talking but- I have pictures of me in it somewhere, do you want to see?" Namjoon nuzzles into your waist, your sternum, and nearly your chest, but you let him. He answers in a purr before Hobi has a chance too. 

"No, I don't need to see, you look lovelier in this, I'm sure."

"I never thought a bit of whiskey would draw compliments out of you alpha," You tease, it's a bit of a change from how firm with you he was yesterday but you're not going to look gift horses in the mouth. Namjoon just shakes his head, rubbing his cheeks across your bodice more thoroughly, almost clumsy in his scenting.  

"I clearly haven't been doing my job if you think you need to get me drunk to compliment you- I'll happily do it again when we all get sober."

"Like that will ever happen again," Jin snorts, then ducks away from Namjoon's /////' We really shouldn't have that kind of mentality look. They can avoid their pack alpha and pack omega responsibilities and sensibilities for a few moments more. a few days more. 

Tae had decided you'd wear this, had picked it out from where it had hung towards the side and she'd even said please. Even if the skirt is so long that you nearly trip over it every time you take a step you'll wear it all night if that's what she wants. Walking is what heels and alphas are for anyway.

You don't look at Hoseok and Namjoon, you just look at Tae, thinking of your wedding. 'I'm gonna marry her one day.' You think.  

The whole pack bursts into laughter, and you realize that you've spoken out loud the same second that you trip, hands jerking to catch yourself on Namjoon's shoulders, regardless of the container of glitter that you hold in your hands. 

When you look Yoongi has more glitter covering him than a stripper would at Mardi Gras. More than they put on Edward Cullen in Twilight. Their laughter redoubles, and when Yoongi breathes out in a huff, his breath sparkles. 

"Jesus fucking Christ."  

Your cheeks are brighter than your skirt while Jin tries to clean off his thighs swatting the glitter onto the floor but everyone's laughing too hard to properly help. Yoongi repays their laughter by shaking his hair out over them much to their dismay.

Jungkook is hiccupping with how hard he's giggling, and you're all drunk and in love, and just- there is no harm in it, even as Yoongi sighs and Hobi teases, "You're like fucking Tinkerbell hyung." 

Tae doesn't do anything about your confession, doesn't do anything but laugh and tip her hip into yours, it's so much squishier, so much curvier than it once was. The hormones that have been doing her job in making her soft and supple. Curves that you can't help but feel a little bit later when she pushes you into the side of the couch, your dress and her dress mixing their colors.

"So, you wanna marry me huh?" She's so much taller than you, especially in the Versace pumps she put on. So tall and willowy it has you stammering. 

"Yeah," you say, a little breathless looking up at her. Gulping as she leans, pinning you there. "If Jimin will let me." 

Jimin hasn't seemed to notice that you're having any sort of conversation that should involve him at all, hasn't registered your words at all, too busy staring at Tae with an expression that can only be described as lovestruck, maybe utterly devoted. Your sentiment and want to marry her- hasn't struck him as strange at all. You guess you'll have to ask Yoongi first but when you turn, his cheeks are as pink as your dress. 

Jin lunges forward, miming the neck of a champagne bottle as a microphone, doing a silly voice. "Anything to report? any comment Yoongi- knowing that your mate wants to marry someone thats not you?" 

Yoongi huffs and it casts a new puff of glitter into the air, "she can marry whoever she wants. She's my mate but- if she wants to yeah-" His shoulders shiver, "we'll not anyone- obviously she's limited to the people in this room but-" 

Jin is giggling and so are you, rolling your eyes, "Obviously- not like I'd wanna marry anyone else than you guys-" Hoseok looks away and then back at you but it's a missed moment. Jimin tugs on the laces of Tae's corset and her slight intake of breath has you looking back up at her. 

“Did you have to do it so tight?” He asks, eyes on you. 

“That’s kinda the point of a corset alpha.”

And then- Hobi slaps the couch. A loud sound but a look says he's not angry, he's running his fingers through some of the glitters there, a little pile, uncovering the faint stain below. 

It's a blood splatter. Faded from where Jin poured a whole bottle of hydrogen peroxide over it, but it's faintly there still. Soaked through the fibers and the foam below probably. Maybe all the way to the base and the springs. 

They washed it as much as they could, but they still couldn't get it out all the way. The couch, like a few other things in the house like the curtains- will have to be dealt with and disposed of one day. It is a kind of evidence. There's probably enough DNA to pull from it to be worrisome. 

“Can we like- burn this fucking thing already?”

He’s progressed past normal drunk to not quite able to stand on his own, might fall over, drunk. The glass in his hand sloshing with every movement as he leans over the edge of the couch. Hobi’s already got some on his cheeks, bright yellow gold that crests the highpoint of his cheekbones and the inner corner of his eyes. It looks like sparks a bit- especially with his red hair. 

Jin grimaces, “It was like totally soaked with blood. I did the best I could." 

"No one's blaming you hyung-" 

"Yeah you did like such a good job. It's just- still kinda covered." Namjoon's always trying to ease Jin's discomfort, encourage him, and that's still true even drunk.

“It's probably still got Namjoon’s cum in it from his last rut too.” Half the pack cringes and scolds Jungkook, but he's recalcitrant. "What? It's probably got your cum on it too- we kinda ruined it before the whole murder thing just saying." 

Jungkook hasn’t been drunk in years, he has the lowest tolerance among the eight of you. He bounces giggly, jumping from packmate to packmate, looping his arms around your shoulders and leaning so much of his body weight that you almost topple over, just giggling. Yoongi huffs, a little endeared and a little worried that Jungkook will actually make you fall over.

Jungkook does this to you alot. He likes to overpower you sometimes- not that the hierarchy still needs settling Jungkook just likes to hassle you.

“Hey!” Namjoon chirps from the floor as Jin carefully sweeps up some of the glitter and a few shards from the lamp that Namjoon broke. He’s too drunk to be properly scandalized. 

Yoongi sits back against the cushions, drink in his hands swirling. Ice clinking. “Yeah, let’s burn it.”

And burn it you do. The alphas try to lift it all together and almost fall over themselves, barely moving it even an inch before Yoongi decides to cut it up with his power tools and carry it out piece by piece. It makes a fucking mess in the Living Room before you lug it out to the squishy backyard.

Piles of stuffing litter the living room floor like dust bunnies and noodle swats at them, playing.

Yoongi's got the kerosene and you've got the match and the whole thing goes up in seconds, much to Hoseok and Jungkook's whooping delight. Jin's bundled in a blanket, but even he grins at the flames and the bad memories that burn away with it.

Hobi almost throws his car keys into the fire too but doesn’t. Whooping and waving his arms as the flames climb higher and higher. Yoongi squirts more of the lighter fluid until Namjoon says "That's enough" because a trip to the burn unit isn't what any of you want tonight.

The eight of you stand around it and watch it burn and then when you go back upstairs, Seokjin drags the mattress from your old bedroom into the big room- just like you did during Namjoon’s rut. Jungkook’s reallocating all of the pack's nesting materials to make a fort on the ground floor. Yoongi gets up on a chair to measure out where the studs should be so that he can use nails to secure a sheet to the ceiling like a big circus tent.

“It’s a fort hyung! It doesn’t need to be structurally supportive.”

Yoongi just pecks at Jungkook's head from where he stands on one of the pack's dining room chairs, "Not gonna let the world fall down on top of you bunny."

Tae asks Hobi to play bubblegum pop and they’re just so happy to see her smiling and acting anything like herself that they acquiesce to even her most ridiculous requests.

Hoseok turns the music up loud and you all fucking dance. You and Tae twirl and bounce, your big long skirts heavy and all big. Stained with a bit of mud at the bottom of the backyard. Namjoon makes both of you twirl and snag around your waists as you spin past.

You and Tae hop up and down, screaming along to the lyrics so loud that when it quiets- your voices are rough and raw. Chests a bit lighter with each screamed lyric, something awful working its way out of you with every laugh, something necessary in it as you grip each other's arms and yell out your frustrations against the speaker.

And by then Jungkook asks to wear a dress too- and then you’re really all having fun.

Yoongi is wearing a pair of Tae’s fuzzy knee socks and is dancing slowly with Noodle who chirps in his arms- apparently recognizing that your mate is too soft and squishy at the edges to be worth the hissing. Hair mused from some very involved kissing that you know Hobi dragged him away for.

Noodle keeps his claws sheathed for now as Yoongi dances although he does look vaguely annoyed. Like he doesn’t want to enjoy Yoongi’s touch but does. Watching you and Tae show Jungkook how to walk in high heels with beady yellow eyes. Jungkook gets it quick, quicker than you did.

Tae just nips at his cheek, a little bitey and a lot drunk. Jin and Yoongi have run out of frozen fruit so the drinks are a little stiffer. You’ll probably run out of alcohol by morning.

Someone will offer to drive to the nearest liquor store which will immediately be met by shaken heads and refusals, just this once- you can have alcohol and food delivered. Leaving the house right now still feels too scary. Too nerve-wracking.

Why would you ever leave when you have everything you could ever need, everyone you’ll ever love right here in this room? Wearing glitter and dresses and matching pajamas worn at the edges from love and cuddles.

Namjoon is wearing your bottoms. The very first courting present he ever got you, pink with red hearts. They're a bit tight in the ass and more capris, but they fit him either way. You watch as Namjoon’s fingers toy underneath Seokjin’s hem, splaying and petting a little higher. High enough to show a bruise that you didn’t know existed that lies against Jin’s ribcage.

For now, you’re all safe, and Tae tugs Jungkook upstairs in the direction of your dressing room. “Come on kookie I’ve got the perfect thing.” You know she's not tired of playing dress up with just you- she's just happy to have another canvas.

Tae has 7 other canvases actually, once Jungkook gets in on the dress-up, Jimin follows like the puppy alpha he is, and then Hobi and your mate, Jin, and Namjoon because they want to know what you're shrieking about upstairs. And come up to find Yoongi sprawled out on the floor, a fluffy something stuck over his head kinda making him look like a lampshade.

"It's not my fault your waist is like- super tiny. My head's just big."

And that’s how everyone gets in on it. Dresses and fancy shirts, bedazzled belts strung low over Hobi’s hip, and a silk scarf tied around Namjoon’s neck in a big bow. Jin ends up in a silky shirt that actually makes your heart stop, a glittery broach at the collar that Jimin toys with and Jin lets him touch to his heart's content. Dancing and dancing and falling onto the nest that you’re all building so so sloppy. Earning your first real laugh you’ve let out in days.

“Joonie? Can you please- I’ve waited forever to get my ears pierced and you’re like a surgeon- and you just look it up on YouTube and do it,”

You slip on someone's spilled drink almost tumbling into Hobi who goes to snatch your waist but misses. Giddy and giggly, “I can do it! I pierced mine once in elementary school but they healed over!”

“I don’t know if drunk piercings are the best idea.” Jin says, at the same moment that Jungkook chirps, “I’ll do my belly button if you hold ice to it."

Namjoon is the one who ends up doing it, with his gloves and antiseptic and numbing cream. You check to make sure Tae’s are symmetrical and then Jimin’s because of course he wants to be matching with her, then Jungkook and Jin, because they can be giggly and ridiculous too.   They’ve got high-quality surgical steal and fancy earrings upstairs that Jimin bought Tae during his mad dash to get her all the girl things after she came out (you're still honestly going through all of it). You give Tae the hoops because you know they won’t tug and pull on her hair and Jimin these little studs with a star on them.

Namjoon does it with a kiss on her cheek and a tiny gauze pad with barely a drop of blood on it folded and thrown away. “Good baby girl, was I gentle enough?” he was, he always is gentle enough.

By the end of the night, you’ve got a secondary piercing, and Tae’s already dreaming about getting more. One at a time Namjoon says, the edge of a pack alpha command in his voice. 

~-~

You wake with a pounding headache and to mimosas and a mountain of pancakes that Hobi practically forces down your throat to keep off the worst of the hangover. Until you feel like you might be sick and the pack piles in around where you sit in the bathroom to keep you company through your nausea. A bit more panicky and serious and sober than you have been. 

They stroke your back and pile the big blue blanket around you to keep off the shivers. But you don’t vomit somehow, drinking the electrolyte drink that Yoongi practically shoves down your throat. Quieter now that he’s sober but still unable to watch you suffer. Hand on your chin making you drink. You fall asleep soon after that again, overly full.

You sleep for 12 hours, and wake to the sound of retching, but it's just Yoongi- in a similar position as you are. Apparently he Jin and Namjoon stayed up while the rest of the pack went back to bed and decided to play drinking games that have turned into a bad decision. he'll need a shower before long.

He's not the only one whose in a bad way. Hobi wakes from the nest room staring at the ceiling listless. Still wearing the fancy designer clothes that Tae put him in under one of his hoodies. and you know without having to ask that he's thinking about her, about Moonbyul. 

But getting over this is going to be a work in progress. Everyone is good one moment and then bad the next, only to be good in an hour, laughing like you were never crying. 

Hobi doesn’t want to move, staring blankly at the ceiling Noodle purring against his hip and kneading him, putting holes in his pants. He can’t move from the nest fort in the living room, half open like a clamshell curled away from the entryway. Can't move until Jungkook gets you and you come close and he finally tears his eyes from the ceiling to look at you. You don't have to say a word to him you just guide him into a sitting position and let him rest his face against the crook of your neck. 

You help him take off his sweatshirt and when he nods that he's  ready, guide him up to the upstairs bathroom where tae is already showering off the scent of fire and glitter. You helped her take off her corset just the same, tugging at the ribbon until it fell loose because Jimin complained that he didn't know how to take it off without hurting the dress.

You strip all of them- Hobi and Yoongi and tae, and get them side by side in the bathtub. A firm layer of foam on the top from Jungkook's favorite purple bubble bath, and have a go at grooming them with Jin and Jungkook. Every inch of your alphas is inspected and tested with teeth and purrs. Hoseok closes his eyes to listen to the sound of them, just after Jungkook man handles the rest of the pack into the deep tub that Yoongi installed for this specific purpose.

Jin's purr is deep, yours is musical almost, and Jungkook's is really similar to noodles. He feels a hand on his cheek and knows without opening his eyes that it's yours rubbing away the wetness there. 

"Not crying cuz I'm sad just-"  he doesn't have to explain, doesn't have to do anything but close his eyes and let you make it better. If hurts could come out in the wash- you'd be able to get them out. You of all people know how hard it is for him to feel clean, the grubbiness of bad memories and old hurts that stains his bones.

And yet, you still wash him.

You rub a cloth over his shoulders, the tense part of his neck, his spine all gentle. Again and again until he starts to squirm- nothing about the touch, nothing about the grooming selfish. You ask him if he's done and he says not yet so you keep going until the waters gone cold and everyone else has gotten out of the tub.

Namjoon forces about a gallon of water down yoongi's throat, but the worst of the vomiting seems to be over. yoongi sleeps too- out of sync.

Love feels so tight in his chest that Hoseok can't open his eyes. He falls asleep there until Jin starts to tug at him, and when he opens them, he finds that you're in one of Tae's slip dresses- the kind that she likes to sleep in, translucent and soap sudsy at the hem where you got wet washing him.

His voice is croaky but he asks, "Have you eaten?" The answer, of course, is no. But he remedies it easily for you once he's dressed and scented sweet. An eye for an eye, a hurt for a hurt, and a heart for a heart. 

You order a new couch somewhere on the third day, blue this time instead of grey- to match the tile backsplash in the kitchen. With fabric that’s comfier this time and actually designed to be turned into a nesting nook when you need it. 

Yoongi puts it together sober and then takes it apart just to put it back together again- claiming that one of the legs is squeaky and the middle edge isn't flush. He's feeling better, less hungover and less angry. Happy to have something for his hands to do.

He still doesn’t talk to you more than a few words but he does ask “Hold the flashlight for me?” While Tae is upstairs putting away her torn-apart dressing room with Hobi and Jungkook. 

And you do help your mate- standing in your matching pj’s with clean hair and clean minds for the first time in days. Thoughts unclouded by terror or anger or alcohol. 

You hold his phone while he tamps down on the leg screws. the sound of the others laughing upstairs, both of you quietly accept for the clink click of the socket wrench. You hold the flashlight, hold it even when Yoongi drops his hands, not looking at you, squatting. It's quiet, Noodle sleeps in a puddle of mid-afternoon sunlight by the front door but it's morning for you- all of you slept till noon. 

“I need a moment okay just- give me a second, give me a few days.” You gulp and look at him. But it's as much as Jin has said to you too. As much as any of them have warned. “Give him time pup, he’ll come around.”

“Let me know when you want the next screw.” He turns around, still kneeling before you, hand on your ankle. Circling it slowly and simply. Petting over the ball of your bone and your Achilles tendon. Looking up at you and not saying a thing until you speak.

“You know I’m sorry for it right? That I regret it right?”

“Yeah,” he says, lips downturned “I know. Wish it hurt less that way.”

“If there was something I could do- something that would make it better- you’d tell me right?”

Yoongi pauses, his lips part for a split second and then go closed, and this time his cheeks go pink. But he sounds stronger when he says,

“Yeah, I’d tell you.”

~-~

But it does hurt less this way. All of your secrets and all your shortcomings are out in the open. Day drinking is either a fantastic idea or a terrible one depending on how you look at it. Because for the first time ever you all talk about it instead of keeping it bottled up.

The eight of you are piled into the kitchen, a second food order sits on the fringes in brown paper bags that Hobi doodles on idly with a sharpie, drawing bunnies and noodle and diamond rings and flowers- endless daisies. and then moves to doodling on Yoongi's jeans. Five days in and still completely unwilling to leave the house- still too scary, too many unknowns that linger just outside your door.

The 7 of them sit stretched between the cabinets while you bounce around above them mindful of not tripping on their sprawled legs, cooking up your tiramisu because Hobi had bragged about it and now they all want a taste.

You spin and turn, ducking and dodging needy hands. Jimin leans forward to sneak a quick peck against your knee when you’re mixing some of the egg whites. Jin gets up eventually to help, disliking the way that you teeter too pupish without a reassuring touch and your favorite baking companion at your elbow. Jin ties his apron around your neck and says. “Tell me what to do” Cooking with him is the most normal thing you’ve done in months. You have enough energy for it once.

“You’re making like a double batch, right?” You’re drinking less, all a little less intoxicated, you’d woken up this morning with a headache that faded and now you don’t want to drink anymore, done for the week and maybe the month. Maybe your whole lifetime after almost vomiting- was that yesterday? Or the day before?

“Hyung when I tell you you’re gonna wanna have the whole tray it’s like- so fucking good-”

“You talk a big game Hobi.” Jungkook looks like he wants to be a part of Hobi's big game. Scent swelling sultry and sweet.

There has been surprisingly less sex than you thought there would be although you know that Tae dragged Jimin upstairs late last night for a bit of privacy. It’s nothing like Namjoon’s rut. Without the alcohol, the pack is getting touchier. It’s strange- you almost would have expected them to want more while drinking but it didn’t happen that way.

Now Namjoon’s hand skims your hip whenever you walk past. Stepping over his thick thighs, squishy where they're pulled together to give Yoongi enough room. His hand comes up to toy with the edge of your shirt, A casual yet claiming touch that you pay no mind. Pinching the chub there and murmuring a quiet "fuck."

You raise your eyebrow at him, a bit self-conscious but still willing to let him do what he wants, "having fun Joonie?" You taunt. He leans forward, nose nudging under your shirt, dragging his teeth over the small swell of your stomach in reply. It's nothing new (well you being a bit chubbier is- but you're learning to live with it).

the mood is light until Jin asks you how you did it, how you killed the don and his beta. 

Your recipe book is open in front of him- and that has to be part of the reason why it comes to him. It’s not a secret anymore. Yoongi doesn’t look bothered as the pack quiets down and you tell them everything.

How Moonbyul convinced you to help her do it, how you actually killed them, how she disposed of the evidence. All of it. Jungkook's fingers come up to skim over the scars on your back and you catch his hand gently, taking it away from them because you don't want him to touch them now. 

It's the first time you've addressed the elephant in the room in 5 days and it feels- 

It feels good to talk about it. To get it off your chest. 

You've always told yourself that you had to kill them, it was either them or you, and they were bad people anyway. Who knows how many innocents had fallen under their hands- certainly more than have fallen under Moonbyuls. 

You did what you had to do to survive and there was no way out. But part of you has always wondered if that was true. 

The pack makes you feel like it is the truth. That killing to survive was all you could do. 

But it’s Hobi who bends forward along with Jin, “hang on hang on- fucking cupcakes? You poisoned the head of the fucking mafia using fucking cupcakes?��� 

You blush, and Namjoon drags his finger through some of the whipped cream you’ve already made for the tiramisu. You gave him the bowl after you were done with it and he lifts it up to lick at the bottom, practically putting his face in the metal bowl. Jungkook licks the spoon and Tae tries not to watch his lips pucker. He fidgets, Thigh-shimming where he squirms tucked into Hobi's side. 

Jin's hand on his chin guides the alpha to look up, checking to make sure that he's alright. You don't have to wonder why because last night- Hoseok woke up from nightmares again. 

It was just like your nightmares. One moment you'd been nuzzling into him in sleep, and the next moment his hands had been shaking pushing you off of him. Smelling angry- his caramel scent going burnt and off the more he woke, you'd stayed up with him and piled blankets into the bathtub until he'd fallen back asleep again. Yoongi waited on the fringes with water until Hoseok had fallen asleep fitful- but asleep. 

He'd woken up without an appetite, but when you'd asked him he'd said the only thing he might be able to eat was your tiramisu, so here you are. Nightmares are easy to deal with, Hoseok's nightmares are something you can handle. 

“I bet they were fucking delicious.” 

“Thank you Joonie, they were.” 

Jin and Jimin are staring at you open-mouthed. But there are more questions- clarifications that everyone needs to ask. It feels good to finally talk about this freely. 

“Wait wait wait let me get this straight- Jin’s been working for the FBI for how many years?” 

“Only 6” Jin says at the same time Yoongi says, “6 and ½” and they shoot each other looks before Jin nods, and agrees. Eyes still on Yoongi. Jin and Yoongi are looking at each other with more love than is necessary. And Yoongi answers everyone’s unsure glances.

“I knew from the beginning and it didn’t matter.” Jimin bristles like it should certainly matter but Yoongi squeezes his good shoulder. “It doesn’t matter anymore.” Yoongi furrows his eyes, looking at Jimin's shoulder, and asks Namjoon if Jimin's stitches are ready to come out. 

They are, so Namjoon gets his medical bad and Jimin takes off his shirt. A pair of forceps and medical scissors in his hands as he snips through Jimin’s stitches and carefully pulls them out one by one, wearing sterile rubber gloves but pausing to let Jin feed him more spoonfuls of whipped cream. 

“Yeah,” Jin says, contemplating. “It doesn’t matter. They were so like bureaucratic anyway." 

"You're not gonna miss it?" Jungkook asks, and Jin shakes his head.

"It's not worth it, I'll find something else to do, I've got like a stellar recommendation from them anyway." 

It’s not just that secret that you talk through; you also talk through jimin and yours. nothing hidden anymore. No reason to hide it.

“Of course, I recognized you Minnie- I met you before I met anyone else- Before I even met you Yoongi.” Now that- Yoongi really doesn’t understand. But Jimin is already explaining before he has a chance to ask. And by the end of it- Yoongi wants to drive hoseok's car into the wall, trembling with how angry he is at past you for being so stupid.

“A fucking bar? You met Jimin at a fucking bar and you didn’t even try and hide the fact that you wanted to kill my brother?”

“Well I wanted to hire an assassin and he was there so-“ 

“Of course, she was gonna hire an assassin hyung, her ex-husband was like a total dick- like even more of a dick than Moonbutt or whatever her name is.”

“Moonbitch Kookie.” 

You skim your fingers through Hobi’s hair, checking to see if he’s alright and he nods, catching your hand and pressing a fleeting kiss there. You need your hands to bake but Hoseok holds onto them a moment longer than is necessary.

“God that's so dumb” Jin slaps Namjoon's arm and he realizes what he just said, his shoulders curling in, “wait you are not dumb and I am just stressed because I’ve never made ladyfingers before- please don’t think I actually meant that-” 

Namjoon rolls his eyes, he’s well aquatinted to how punchy Jin can get when he's tired. That’s nothing new. Jungkook spills across Yoongi’s thighs in mock misery, but he doesn’t react beyond skimming a hand up Jungkook’s back, first over his tee shirt and then under it. 

Yoongi turns to you, where you hold a piping bag filled with creamy batter, taking even deep breaths as you pipe out the first few ladyfingers, showing Jin how to do it without getting bubbles in most of them. “You knew didn’t you?” He’s not accusatory. Just surprised. “That it was dangerous, you knew you could die and you did it anyway.”

You nod without pause, “I’d done more dangerous things by then, It was only a matter of time before someone figured out I’d killed the don and I wanted to make sure I got to see him die before they got to me.” 

Yoongi takes a sip of his glass, angry at you for making poor decisions back before he even knew you. Angry even though his anger has nowhere to go that's good. 

“You have to be more careful.” 

“All of us have to be more careful,” Hobi replies he doesn’t like the reproach in Yoongi’s voice. Doesn’t like the way he’s been talking to you. But all the anger and all the pain is healing (it's all just love with nowhere to go. All you have to do is give it time.)

The wounds on your hands are closing slowly- healed enough already that it doesn’t hurt when you hand over the piping bag to give Jin a chance to try. You've done the first 12 ladyfingers and he does the next two dozen to get the hang of it. When Tae asks, you show her how to pipe out a little heart, and then JK wants to make a dick-shaped one and you let him. He gets more of the batter on his sleeve, but you made extra just in case something like this happened. 

Jungkook sits up abruptly, wide bunny eyes dark and glassy upturned at you, glancing between you and Jimin, “What did- what does killing feel like?”

“Oh my god Jk you can’t just ask that.” 

“No, he can ask I just-“ Jimin swallows, and puts his hand down. He's holding a piece of gauze where Namjoon puts the small cut pieces of the suture. Tinged pink from a little bit of blood. His chest shines in the half-light, the little bit of antiseptic glimmering around the freshly pulled stitches on his shoulder catching the light. Jimin’s face twists in pain, but you know it’s not his incision that’s bothering him. Namjoon's gentle as he pulls the last one.

“I don’t want you to think less of me.” 

Everyone’s silent, no one rushes to reassure him, because the truth is that you don’t know. You put your hand over his squeezing- the best that you can offer. Jungkook pushes on, undeterred, “Tell us about the first time.”

“The first time was an accident- it was- before you guys just before Tae went to school- right when she started and I wasn’t thinking. Someone rushed at one of my private clients and I just-“ Jimin's eyes go dark and he picks at one of the stures until Namjoon pushes his hands away.

"You did what you were hired to do," Namjoon asks, and Jimin nods. You and Jin finish the tiramisu and Yoongi reaches out a hand to help you sit with the two big trays of it, portioning them out onto the plates.

"I protected them at a cost." Jimin stares down at his plate, the perfect square on it. and you nudge it until he eats it.   “That music executive” Tae blurts, eyes shining, connecting the dots “you were really quiet after you came back but then you got buys, I just thought-” She goes quiet when you feed her the first bite, letting out a surprised but appreciative hum, distracted by how good it tastes, "This is really good."   Yoongi huffs, rueful in his understanding. “All they really need is one kill on you and they’ve got you for good.” But that's all in the past now, Jimin is never going to have to kill someone again, even if he did get paid for it.

He lifts a fork to his mouth, pulling back after a second and furrowing his eyebrows. licking the cream from his lips slowly, eyes narrowing.

"Okay now I'm really angry, how have you never made this for me?"

"You never asked Yoongi."

"We'll I'm asking now, I can't believe you kept this from me for so long. Can you make it on my birthday?" You blush, bright red, and Jungkook leans over to press his nose into your flushed cheek.

Jimin answers Jungkook's question after a few bites. “It didn’t bother me, after a while it didn’t bother me at all" Jimin turns to Jin, eyes shining with unshed tears, "hyung, does that make me crazy? Does that make me a psychopath?”

Jin swallows softly around his bite of tiramisu, it really is quite good, top 5- if not top 3 on his list of favorite desserts you've made. “I’m not sure. There is an assessment as a part of the DSM-5. I could test you if you want. Although I’m not sure I could be totally impartial.”

Jimin looks winded, desperate from the line of hope that Jin dangles in front of him, a chance at salvation. Jimin has always wanted to know- in that same twisted way he’s always wondered if he and Tae were going to go to the same place when they died- if he was honest to god crazy. Jimin’s always wanted to know what makes him so different than other people. always looked for a reason and now jin might give him one.

“What do you mean by impartial?”

Jin sets down his fork. “Jimin, do you think any of us wouldn’t do what we had to do to survive I mean- Tae and Y/n killed someone over there 6 days ago. Do you think that makes them psychopaths? Do you think that makes them damned?”

Jimin’s chest heaves and he can’t answer Jin, But after a second, Jimin asks again, “You’ll assess me then?” Tae's fingers rub mindless patterns over the back of Jimin’s hand, her knuckles are still bruised.

“The next day we’re both alone in the house.” He grimaces, “It’s the least I could do after shooting you.”

Jimin whines, mood lightening. “Come on, you know I don’t take it personally.”

At the end of the day, the fact that Jimin’s a killer hurts less than you might think, although their pack has their own questions about it, Tae too, although her questions are limited, Jimin answers each of them truthfully and honestly. He'd never think of lying to her about this, not anymore, not again.

When it comes down to it there is a lot you’re willing to justify when it comes to the people you love and the people you choose. You’re all killers and liars and secret keepers. No true sinner and no true saint between the eight of you. It’s a good thing that you have more than enough love to go around.

Enough for a lifetime you think. You’ll have to wait and see.

“You realize everything you’ve said is insane right” Namjoon’s not angry, just tired and full as he sprawls out. Uncaring of everything that’s been said, unthreatened. “Like- actual mafia movie insane right? Are your names even your real name?”

Yoongi can’t keep in his snort. “Of course? What kind of question is that?”

You give them a look, “Actually…” The uproar is immediate, and everyone shouts their indignance and disbelief. All but roaring in shock, your laugh rings high and loud.

“Kidding! Just trying to lighten the mood!” Jin playfully drags you over his lap, swatting your ass playfully in punishment. Your laughing only gets louder. He leaves a coco-colored hand print on your white shorts.

Tae’s in more of a joking mood now, “am I allowed to use this for my next storyline?”

“Yes” and “Definitely not!” are mutual cries.

Maybe you don’t need to know everything about the person you love. Maybe love is just understanding someone’s secrets and loving them anyway. Maybe the biggest lie that Namjoon can tell himself- to preserve their family that they’ve forged through fire and fucking blood is that Jimin only ever had to kill when he needed to. He parts his thighs after he throws away his gloves- not even bloody, and Jimin slides in between them relieved.

His back resting against Namjoon’s chest, a happy growl grumble slipping out as he tests his hands, and Namjoon tests how far Jimin’s fingers can bend. “Pt starts tomorrow” Namjoon intones, a warning in his voice. Jimin nods, perfectly obedient.

“The rest of our lives start tomorrow too.” No one disagrees.

Jungkook is giggly and sits between Yoongi’s thighs, whipped cream on his cheek, they’ve already finished the first tray of tiramisu that you’d made and are making a serious dent in the second one. Cooking for them fills you with that same warm feeling as it always does. Cooking is a love language. food too. Your stomach is full of it.

“Hang on hang on- let me get this straight-“ Jungkook ticks them off one by one on his fingers. “Jin’s an FBI agent. Jimin’s an assassin. And you almost were one too?”

You roll your eyes, but nod anyway. It's truth enough- it's pretty obvious to you that's what Moonbyul and Hyejin had to slated for (privately Jimin wonders what your moniker might have been. Would you have been the flower to his snake? The dove to Hyejin's bumblebee?)

Jungkook points his finger at Hoseok next to you, the two of you share a fork and a plate smudged with chocolate and whipped cream. Namjoon has completely given up on portioning out his onto a plate and goes at the tray with Jin, a fork between the two of them.

“Hobi’s exes are the current head of a fucking crime family- and Yoongi’s like the heir to some fucked up advice column throne thing- that I still don't quite understand but- Has everyone been keeping something from each other this whole damn time?”

“Does mine even count? It’s not like I knew my ex was like- a fucking mafioso or whatever-”

“I mean- I kept the secret that I was a girl for like- my whole fucking life so I feel like everyone else gets a pass.”

Jimin combs a hand through Tae’s hair, looking down at her and rubbing away a smudge of tiramisu with his thumb. And you hit Namjoon’s knees with your socked feet. Your socks have strawberries on them and a hole at the toe. “You definitely get a pass baby girl.”

“What about you Joonie? Any secrets up your sleeve?”

Your pack alpha shrugs. Eyebrow's furrowing as he thinks hard about it. “I think the only secret I’ve ever kept from you guys was throwing out the lease that one time-“

“Oh my god I completely forgot about that-”   “Yeah, Jin hyung was so so mad. Almost as mad as Yoongi is.”

Your mate spills his plate with you quick he leans over to pinch Hobi’s scent gland. “Hey, I’m working on it!” 

His last bite slips off his plate and plops onto the ground. Noodle darts forward, trying to get to it before you snatch him back. Unfortunately, no one thinks to do the same with Jungkook.

The hardwood floors have seen worse things in recent days than some whipped cream and everyone lets out belated 'No!' and Gross Jk' as Jungkook leans over to lick it up. You laugh as Hobi snatches Yoongi’s plate and holds it over his head, almost dropping it on himself with how Yoongi lunges. And Jin holds his plate of tiramisu out of reach of their roughhousing.

You rest your head on Tae’s shoulder and watch your pack bicker and then shoot it out for the last slice of tiramisu. Yoongi wins and licks the tray clean, getting a tiny spot of cream on his nose that Jin kisses off. She laces your hand with hers.

Both of you have lipstick swatches from yesterday still on the back of your palms, the faint imprint of the colors of your kisses that her fingers trace idly, gently. The memory there for now but not for long.   “What about you Kookie? Any secrets tucked up against your sleeve?”

Jungkook presses a finger to his lips, almost coquettish with how wide his eyes go. “What hyung? Me?”   Yoongi leans into his space, wrapping his arms around his knees. “Yeah, seems like everyone’s got a secret but you.”   “Hyung, you know if I’ve got a secret- it’s one I’ll never tell.”

~-~

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Notes:

Trying my hardest <3 I'm admittedly having a tough time right now, this chapter felt very nice to write because it's all about the beginning of the packs happy ending <3

i personally think they should have all fucked on the floor in tae's dresses, but thats just my personal thoughts about it all. this is one of the few times that i have pictures in my head of the dresses that tae and the m/c wear but i cannot find pictures online that match for the life of me!!!

The moonbitch moment made it into the chapter- idk who it was that commented that but 😂 i lowkey loved it so it made it in <3

What i've been trying to get at with most of the yoongi/m/c healing arc in this chapter is that they both need to be fully actualized and fully realized players in their relationship. yoongi does not and has not told her his wants and needs very often in the story- and that changes after this chapter- because in the moment they're putting together the sofa he realizes 'oh i actually can tell her what i need' it's important to note that the mc has healed to this point like- earlier in the story she might have taken any request from yoongi as criticism.

idk if anyone saw where i was talking about the eventual like 50 year end for the story like- where i think they all end up. but knowing that tae, hobi, and the m/c are the last packmates left alive into their 80's makes the conversation about the m/c marrying tae and not hobi all the more like...ah, sad maybe? i originally planned for tae and the m/c to be the last alive but maybe it should be the m/c and hobi- do you think they'd get married after tae died?

i love that tae and the m/c fit the tall and short lesbian niche that i am so so into like- i know i went on a bit about them but they are very in love and their love story has been some of my favorite in this book. i felt like this chapter needed a bit of glitter.

idk if i mentioned tae having her ears pierced before- but just pretend that i haven't!

i added the part with the m/c washing hobi at the last minute but let me tell you that part did almost make me cry so...

i ended up having to cut the after part of this chapter, but i kinda like it better that way because then yoongi doesn't forgive her right away. idk, that was the main part i wanted to work on for this chapter so its kinda good that i get to wait a little bit.

i've been...admitedly, dangerously depressed for the last two weeks, and i think working on this chapter made me realize that working on bily, writing stuff, is legitimately the only time i am happy and one of like 3 things that makes me feel okay, i hope it makes you feel okay too <3

Until next time!

[bleuside97]

That Night Was Different

paring: richclubowner!Jungkook x lonely reader

genre: one night stand au smut

summary: looking for excitement you unexpectedly found someone who gave you everything you had wished for.

warnings: smut, n*pple play, coochie eating, praising kink.

This month was no doubt one of the most difficult for you. You maintained a stable position in retail that provided you with a satisfactory income, just enough for taking care of your bills. Unfortunately, it was announced to you that due to some financial struggles, the company had to let some employees go, including you. As a strong and resilient woman, however, you refused to give up and started looking for other jobs. But no luck seemed to be on your side, and to make matters worse, your landlord raised the rent. So, overwhelmed by all the stress, you decided to head to a young upscale club called "Dionysus." in Central Seoul, South Korea. To have some drinks to forget all your worries for a while. You've been coming here everyday for a month. The same night every night.

On a cold Saturday night you were sitting alone at the bar. "Alone yet again." Y/n muttered under her breath to herself. Being an introvert for so long has had its benefits but right now you were met with the down sides. In such an uplifted environment you couldn't help but feel drained. You didn't know why but you suddenly didn't want to be there anymore. Your eyes advert to the sixth shot glass you ordered and just been placed in front of you. For a moment you only stare at the alcohol. "You'll be the death of me." You say before gulping the bitter substance down your throat. It burns your esophagus and makes a quick disgusted face before slamming it down on the rough wooden table.

Your eyes gleam with wonder as you observe the recently developed nightclub. With its large dance floor shining brightly in neon lights and illuminated by spotlights and a shimmering disco ball, the atmosphere practically oozes excitement. All around, drunken and flushed bodies move along to the beat of the thumping music; jumping and swaying in a joyous and carefree manner. You can't help but smile along with them. The vibrant, pounding sound resonates within your body, making your heart beat faster. You don't know what it is, but a sudden urge compels you to take a leap of faith and join the others on the dance floor, letting the infectious music guide your body.

The rhythm of the song shifted into a captivating, slow melody. Deliberately, you began to move with a seductive grace, allowing your hips and legs to sway freely, independent of any outside influence. Your arms glided slowly down your body, accentuating every curve. Suddenly, you could feel the presence of another body behind you. His hands lightly gripped your waist, subtly indicating his presence without interrupting your movements. In perfect synchronization, his hips matched your pace, creating an unspoken harmony. Your gaze was drawn to his muscular arms, belonging to a handsome man with an olive complexion. He pulled you closer, intensifying the connection, inviting you to feel his undeniable presence. Maintaining a steady rhythm, you bit your lip, longing for increased tension. His hands on your hips guided you as he turned you to face him.

It was like a fantasy come to life, as you gazed upon this breathtaking man. With long, black locks framing his chiseled features and captivating doe-shaped eyes, he exuded an aura of charm and allure. His tight-fitting shirt showcased his sculpted chest, the muscles beneath emphasizing his strength. Utterly captivated by him, you were unable to look away. Sensing your reaction, he smirked, radiating confidence. His right hand glided from your hip, up along your side, until it reached the nape of your neck, holding you gently but with purpose. Leaning close, he whispered in your ear, "Come with me to my table."

Before you can even consider, your involuntary movements had agreed for you. You nodded your head, following closely behind him amidst the sweltering crowd of flushed bodies on the dance floor. The sensation of being amidst the flurry of the dance floor was something you had suddenly yearned for. The anticipation of what the night would bring fueled your excitement. A magnificent gold and velvet stanchion rope stood as a barrier at the entrance of the elevated section. Swiftly, the security personnel removed the rope, granting you both access. As you stepped into the new setting, you felt a sense of liberation. The section was occupied by individuals most likely of a similar age. Their closed and self-assured expressions hinted at their elevated status. You felt out of place amidst them. Jungkook found an unoccupied seat on the lounge chair and graciously offered it to you. In a relaxed posture, he placed one arm on the headrest of the couch while the other remained nestled in the space between his spread legs.

You settled down beside him, avoiding eye contact. In fact, you instinctively stiffened your posture on the couch as you sensed his piercing gaze. There was a slight eerie silence between you. "May I get you a drink, my dear?" he smoothly inquired, his gaze filled with thoughtfulness. "Pleasure meeting you I'm Jeon Jungkook." He removes his hand from between his hand and offers it to you. You take it. "Y/n." You say with a charming smile. "Y/n..." He holds your hand and kisses the back of your hand. "A beautiful name for a beautiful woman." The intensity in his eyes was undeniable. "I see something exceptional in you," he replied in a suave, charismatic tone. "To the extent that I believe you are the most stunning being I have laid eyes on in a considerable time." "Don't I feel like a rare gem amongst the ordinary?" you chuckled, amused by your own remark. "How do you justify deeming me special?" He smirked and playfully winked at you. "You are more than just a rare gem, my dear. You are the brightest star illuminating the entire night sky; your radiance is so captivating that it becomes impossible to look away. You are a true masterpiece."

Unimpressed you chucked, "Is this how you're gonna win me over?" Y/n scoffed shaking his head at the lame small talk. He smiles confidently in response. "I'm going to treat you to every wish of yours and to everything you could ever want. I want to show you the time of your life." He gives you another confident smirk. So you're a genie?" You sarcastically asked.

He chuckles confidently, not deterred by your sarcastic tone. "If I am, what wish would you make if I could grant it?" He asks as he leans forward slightly, his eyes twinkling with interest. She backs up a bit at his closer contact but remains quiet. "Oh come on, love," he says mischievously, giving your arm a squeeze. "Let me win you over." He smiles at you. "I know you like me already. So let me prove to you that I'm serious." "Oh. Such rumors don't exist." You turn looking away. He chuckles. "Oh you don't?" Jungkook asks with a sly smirk. "I know you're playing hard to get." His demeanor becomes confident once more. "You're playing this little game of cat and mouse as if I don't know exactly what you're trying to do." He gives you a playful wink to show that he knows you're playing along with him. "Let me be your man i know I can treat you like a princess. Tell me what you want and I'll give it to you." She gets up all close and personal to his beautiful face, "You know what I want." He looks at her with a mystery to her answer. "A night where I can have blissful fun and forget about my life, just for one night. I wish for the best night of my life."

He looked at her with a sad expression for a moment, a pause before answering. "I've been watching you for a while, y/n, I watch you come into my club every night for the past month. At the same time every night. I don't want you alone in your hard times." You stopped talking and just listened to him. He twists lip ring before continuing, "I'll give you an offer." You immediately shake your head. "Oh I'm not like that. No Thank you, sir."

You get up to leave but he pulls you back down. "Before I can tell you, Let me give me your wish, y/n." Y/n thinks for a moment. Wondering if this is the right thing to do? Who knows what she is getting herself into. Jungkook smirks at the kiss that you place on his hand. "I told you I'd make you feel something," he purrs. "This is just the beginning, love; I plan to show you many nights like these." He gives you a flirtatious wink and holds you closely against him. "Follow me," he says as he leans in close before pulling away. He motions with his hands to follow him and begins to walk out the door, motioning for you to follow him with his hand. Jungkook leads you from the bar and into what appears to be a private suit in his club guarded by security his best men. Before coming to a halt. The security grants him and you access. He unlocks the door with a key. Opening it to a grand suite. You are awfully impressed. "Close your eyes," he commands. "Trust me. You'll love what I have in store for you."

You close your eyes with hands unsure of this was safe. He doesn't waste time before he's kissing you sensually, licking your bottom lip asking for entrance. You open your mouth his tongue swirls around yours and fights for dominance as you let him have it. Spending some time making out, getting to know each other with your mouths he begins to kiss down your neck leaving open mouth kisses down your neck behind your ears occasionally nipping at it. He rips your dress and your bra and attacks your left boob. Sucking on your nipple and palming the other one in his other hand. “Hmm? You like this don't you?" His tongue begins to swirl around the nipple. You bite your lip and you have to force your eyes to look at the ceiling. Jungkook’s inked hand reaches down your lower back. His subtle touches leave a trail of shivers, until his pads brush over the slope of your ass. He squeezes your cheek, firm fingers kneading into your skin.

Leaving you breathless Jungkook's hand graze the sides of your body. As you continue kissing, Jungkook’s hands creep bare body up your thighs until your panties are revealed. His hands press further toward your inner thighs, and you gasp into the kiss when his thumb pushes against the seat of your underwear.They have been damp for a while now and you know he knows this, so you aren’t surprised when he breaks the kiss to smirk. With hon many times you see him smirk tonight it makes you want to punch him. "All for me?" He chuckles before removing your panties. He pushes you to the nearest wall and begins playing with your pussy. He spreads your wetness with his finger. Your hand on Jungkook's shoulder squeezing it when he brushes past your clit. His finger dwells there, putting pressure on your swollen clit. Then Jungkook’s hand is reaching for you again. He brushes a finger over your hole, and your body twitches from the sensitivity. He slides that finger through the wetness and then uses the lubrication to push only the tip of his finger in. he dips it in and out, teasing the nerves at your entrance. Your hips impulsively start to rock, a shaky whimper rolls past your mouth.

Then quickly transitions to his tongue is on your pussy. Using both his spread your cheeks open for better access. His tongue dives between your folds, inciting breathless whimpers from you. His head nudges your entrance. You inhale sharply ready for him inside you. He pulls out his cock out of pants and sdjust the tip to your entrance. Brushing the tip against your quivering hole. Jungkook pushes his cock inside "You can take it.” Jungkook’s hand finds your tit, firmly palming the smooth flesh. “You’re gonna take my cock like the good girl you are, right?” You only cry out in pleasure. He continues to thrusts deeply in you. “Damn, you feel so fucking amazing,” he grunts, a harshness surrounds his tone. Jungkook loses himself. He finds his rhythm and thrusts inside your pussy with sharp motions. “So fucking pretty.” A hand travels over your ass to your spine and back. “The prettiest girl,” he rasps. A smack on your butt was given. The pain leaving your walls clenching around his thick cock. He grops your breasts as you both reach your climax. Collapsing in your shoulder. He whimpers in your ear.

a/n: alot of mistakes and im not sure if i like it too much so i will be editing it alot tmrw but enjoy fkr now

[bangtaninborderland]

Okay anyone have any member ship fic recommendations like this?

Literally begging for a dominant mafia taehyung x bratty but submissive Jungkook recommendation.

Im really looking for a good series!!

[kimthwariru]

Like the wind

pairing: Taehyung x reader

(+Jungkook)

genre: smut, enemies to lovers, angst, collage au, rich kid!Taehyung

Masterpost

Chapter 3: flashbacks

You were used to having cold showers by now. You’d first tried it when you’d read on some health site that it was supposed to help with skin and stress. You didn’t know about the skin part, but you truly felt way more relaxed when you showered with cold water. You’d get so distracted with how cold it was, that there was no time to overthink—a task you often did while showering. Something you truly did not need right now.

Because there was a list of questions in your head waiting to be checked out. Questions you had no answers to, and would probably never get.

Why was Kim Taehyung such an asshole?

Why did he act the way he did?

Why did he fuck you over like that?

How can someone place a bet over who they’re fucking?

That dude was disgusting, but what was worse was the fact that, for mere moments, you’d fallen for his lies. You thought that maybe, there was something there. That maybe that boy you’d met years ago was starting to resurface.

But no. Kim Taehyung was a fucking monster who didn’t care about anyone’s feelings but his own.

Frustration clawed at your chest as you closed your eyes under the ice cold water.

Your mind travels to Marloom 4 years ago, a port near Outfield where fishermen and boat crew mostly lived. It was probably the poorest region outside the wall, which was why you were so surprised when you saw Taehyung there, sitting at the edge of the deck, his bare feet brushing along the waves. He was like a picture.

“y/n!” He’d called out “check this out” he’d showed you a book you’d been trying to get your hands on forever which unfortunately, was limited edition and way out of your budget.

“No way!!” You smiled “How did you even manage to get that?”

He shrugged his shoulders “The publishing company works for my dad” he handed it to you “it’s yours”

“You’re kidding!?”

“No, take it. Read it and tell me if it’s worth the trouble.”

“Of course I will. Thanks, Tae”

He smiled at that, but his expression quickly faded into a sad grimace “Hey, are you alright? What are you doing in Marloom anyway?”

“I don’t feel lonely here. Local folks don’t even recognize my face, to them I am just a teenager, not Kim Taehyung, so they will scold me for chasing ducks, yell when I steal the ropes to climb some tree… there’s even an old lady that gives me these vanilla cookies every Sunday, somehow they make me feel less lonely”

You’d basically forgotten that Kim Taehyung was this well known prince of Hashfield that would take his father’s place one day. His face would feature in many magazines. ‘Prince Charming’ was one of the many nicknames given to him by the media, but, to you, he’d always been Tae.

“Did I tell you about the novella I’ve been reading?” You tried to change the subject the minute you saw his eyes turning sad. Today would’ve been a month since his mother had left without even saying goodbye, or where she was going.

“About the knight who doesn’t know whether to speak or die.? I think you told me already.”

Obviously you had mentioned it and forgotten. “Yes.”

“Well, does he or doesn’t he?”

A handsome young knight is madly in love with a princess. And she too is in love with him. Though she seems not to be entirely aware of it.

Despite the friendship the blossoms between them or perhaps because of that very friendship, the young knight finds himself so humbled and speechless

He knows they are from two different worlds. The princess was to marry soon, and he’d be serving the new king until the day he died.

So, despite his feelings, he's totally unable to bring up the subject of his love.

Till one day he asks the princess point blank

Is it better to speak or to die?

“Better to speak, she said. But she’s on her guard. She senses a trap somewhere.” You replied

“So, does he speak?”

“No, he fudges.”

“Figures. People never say what they truly feel”

“If you speak, you risk rejection, or worse. The knight could be exiled from the kingdom. . .But if you don't speak, then you keep the words inside you, you essentially kill them, let them die with you, and you risk nothing. Which one would you choose?”

His honey eyes reached yours and for a second you’d forgotten your name. “I’m not sure which would be more suitable…”

He made a pause.

“To expose your depth and your darkness, to expose the most personal parts of yourself? To present yourself to the world with your skin flipped inside out? Or to keep a fire bubbling within, never unburdening yourself by letting go of the passionate energy pounding in your lungs? To suffocate, never releasing the words from your throat. To die with a legacy or to have your beliefs, mind, thoughts remain unknown, to let your mind leave with your body. A well known library book or a diary that has never been invaded. Realistically, I’d choose to die, but I knew I would regret it later on”

You loved the way his mind worked. The way he’d analyze situations the same way you did. But you couldn’t help but see he was in sorrow, his eyes would wonder around, because maybe if they met yours for too long they’d uncover how hurt he was. “Look I know you don’t wanna talk about it. . .but what you said earlier, about feeling lonely. I feel like that all the time. I’m only saying this because I want you to know you’re really not alone in that feeling. In case you think you are.”

He averted his stare from the sea to your eyes “You know what’s really funny? When I seem to get really lonely you’re the person that happens to be there…and…I guess, I’m lucky for that because you seem to have a soothing effect on me. You know, the things I would normally worry about, they don’t really feel that warring when I talk to you”

Fuck.

You close your eyes and let the water drops his your face. Cold showers were the only thing that prevented you from overthinking, but it looks like this time, your thoughts had taken over.

Taehyung P.O.V

It was cold.

Not that he expected to find warmth and comfort, but he couldn’t help but notice it seemed to be colder than usual. While he walked down the silent corridors, Taehyung wondered when was the last time this house had felt like a home, and not just a shelter with a roof under which he barely existed.

He guesses it was a long time ago. Before his mother had left. The process took him back to a long lost summer, too many years ago, when the walls were still vibrating with life and happiness. That there was even a time in which he had walked barefoot, with just his trunks on in the middle of the winter, without feeling cold, was such a preposterous thought he sometimes wondered whether it had really happened at all, or it was just a fantasy his mind had made up.

It was not a fantasy, and he knew it.

Taehyung knew there was a time he had loved his life, and that he was believed to be destined for greatness. To inherit this big empire his dad had carefully laid out for him.

All bullshit. 

He quickly pushed these pointless thoughts to the corner of his mind where they belonged, to focus on the more pressing matter of why his house had suddenly become as cold as the Antarctic. The answer to that question came when he noticed that every single fireplace was empty.

“Fucking hell” he muttered

It was Maya’s fault - as always - but he couldn’t bring himself to summon their head maid to tell her she had yet again forgotten to light the fire, mostly because it would have just made her cry for thirty minutes, promising him that she’d be more attentive next time. But no matter how many times Maya promised, she always forgot and, to be honest, he didn’t care any more.

Taehyung was conscious this house had long lost its past glory, with the cold that now covered every piece of furniture and treasure his family had been so proud of. He vaguely remembered his father showing off a miniature greek statue of Achilles, whose head was covered in gold, to a distinguished member of the British Royal family, and wondered what his old man would have thought if he knew his son had used the priceless treasure as a target, and had concluded its existence by flinging the remains into the fire.

 After having lit all the fireplaces, he sank heavily into an old velvet armchair and grabbed the bottle on the small table on his left. Not even bothering to acknowledge what it was - honestly it didn’t make any difference - he uncorked it and began to drink straight from the neck.

Irish.

It was definitely Irish whiskey. Although not The Macallan, or perhaps it was just the shittiest bottle ever produced by that brand.

Taehyung took another long swig, Macallan or not it perfectly served its aim. Unfortunately, his busy drinking was interrupted by the sudden appearance of their head maid, Maya.

“I’m sorry to disturb you, sir,” she squeaked in her high-pitched voice, “but mister Logan has come to see you.”

He closed his eyes and set his jaw, mentally cursing his bad luck. “Where is he now?”

“I’m here.”

Logan Everett’s slow deep voice forced Taehyung to lift his eyelids. Time hadn’t been kind to the former Minister of justice, the black of his hair had long ago disappeared to make room for a pure white, his forehead wrinkled and it seemed he needed aid from an emerald embedded cane in order to stand up straight. But time hadn’t been kind to Taehyung either, so he wisely opted to not share his thoughts.

“Hello, uncle Logan” were the words he greeted him with instead, after dismissing Maya with a nod, and before lifting his left arm to offer him the liquor. “Want some? I’m afraid it’s not Macallan but it gets the job done”

Logan twisted his lips into a disapproving grimace as he proceeded to sit on the armchair opposite to him. “It’s 5 o’clock in the afternoon, Taehyung.”

“Do I have to take that as a no, thank you ?”

“Obviously.”

Was it ten years ago? He recalls that’s the last time he’d seen Logan Everett this close. He’d phone Taehyung from time to time, make sure he wasn’t drunk driving himself into a ditch, but other than that, Taehyung’s godfather was nothing but a ghost in his life.

His father’s best friend.

Funny, considering Logan was somewhat of a decent human being, or just, a human being—unlike his father. When his mother was still here, Logan along with his late wife vacationed with them every summer. Taehyung remembers himself running around in Verona, Italy. Logan chasing after him.

It was warm then, unlike now; Taehyung was freezing.

“Is he here? Your father?”

Taehyung took his time to drink again and then shook his head. “No.” Thankfully

“Does he plan to come back soon?”

“As far as I know, he is having the time of his life finalizing some deal in Germany so… no.” He cocked his eyebrows while staring at his Godfather. “What do you need from him?”

To state that the relationship between Logan and his father had deteriorated was an utter underestimation, since the two of them had barely spoken in those long years. When Taehyung had asked why —when he still cared—the cryptic answer Logan gave him was “he destroyed something I cared about”

Nothing surprising there. Ruining others’ lives was his father’s expertise, as Taehyung knew from first hand experience.

“I heard he’s getting you engaged with the Arden family.”

“I’m not getting engaged with anyone” Taehyung replied immediately, taking another sip of Irish while his eyes stayed on the older man.

“Unfortunately, I don’t think it’s your choice to make, kid”

“Uh I’m pretty sure I can’t get engaged if I don’t consent. My dad may be rich but he is not God. Besides, what’s the worst he could do? Exile me from Hashfield? He’d be doing me a favor”

“You’re speaking nonsense” Logan’s hands wrapped around the cane in frustration “Believe it or not, The wall is here to protect you son. To get to the level of wealth your father is right now, he had to make a lot of enemies, powerful people, who would love nothing but his only heir outside the wall, unprotected.”

Every word Logan spoke made less sense than the other “What do you even mean?”

“The less you know the better” There was no hesitation in Logan’s speech. He slowly got up and paced towards Taehyung. Resting a palm in his shoulder “You’re getting older Taehyung, you’re not a little boy anymore.” There was a pause “Get engaged with the Arden Lady. . .people like us, living in our world, we don’t marry for love… but power. We build walls higher than the rest, because we have way more to loose”

The smell of expensive paint, deodorant, high-end perfume, and cigarettes entered your nostrils as you opened the door.

“You need anything madam?” Celine’s maid greeted you, making you feel more out of place than ever. Maids, palaces for homes and stadium like gardens made you question your existence in Hashfield everyday.

“No, thank you” you honeyed your voice. These people were working class—like you. You’ve seen the way insiders treated their staff and it made you sick to your stomach every time, you figure that’s how they’d treat you had you not been accepted into Hashfield College.

“This way, madam”

You look around.

Imagine the interior of the Palace of Versailles—or perhaps those gorgeous buildings in Florence were more like it— gold, marble, mirrors. Large and heavy-looking curtains draped down the sides of the extensive windows and the floor was this sturdy polished oak wood. The contrast between the light colours and the dark ones was just perfectly balanced. It was extraordinarily aesthetically pleasing. You felt so out of your league you thought you’d stain the place.

Underneath all the chemicals you perceived, you could distinguish the smell of wood, which was probably because of the floor. Your eyes glazed over the gorgeous cream-coloured walls, which were decorated with the most awe-inspiring golden ornaments. The place was definitely for the elite. And if the walls weren’t a perfect indication then the silk, ruby red, one of a kind dress Celine was wearing certainly was.

“Y/n!, hey! what’s up?” Jin called you out the minute he laid eyes on you. He’d been extra protective this week, texting you every day to see if you wanted him to bring god damn ice cream like it would make this whole ‘bet’ scandal go away.

It was sweet of him, it really was, but the embarrassment that washed over you when everyone learned about the bet Taehyung had made over who was going to fuck you first, was not going to get better with fucking ice cream.

“Hey guys” you acknowledged everyone in the room. You hadn’t made eye contact with Zed since that night—and you weren’t planning on making any today—your stomach dropped to your knees every time you thought about what had happened.

Kim Taehyung fucked up the relationship between the only insiders you hanged out with.

“Y/n, you know we’ve all been talking about how much of a dick Taehyung is…” Jiyeon started. An apologetic look on her face.

Fucking great.

You specifically had texted Jin about wanting to avoid this situation. He’d promised this would just be a simple hang out with friends, maybe drink a little wine to pass the time and then go back home.

You did not want to talk about the bet that had been placed without your consent. Especially in front of Zed who was swirling his whiskey like it was freaking talking to him.

“What he did was… terrible, he’s always been such an A-hole to girls. But betting over such a thing?” She shook her head “That’s low. Even for him”

“True” added Celine

“Guys. Really. It’s fine” you tried to mask your emotions with a smile “Can we talk about something else?. . . Anything”

• • •

Billie Holiday played softly from the pool radio. Condensation dripped down crystal glasses, and silverware glinted in the bright sunlight. It was a chilly October afternoon, the steady breeze being the perfect interlude.

The chairs were soft, the food was good, and the wine was worth twice your house, but it could only be so comfortable having dinner with a bunch of insiders.

“Anyway, I heard the Arden family is settling matters with The Kim cooparation—”

“Jiyeon.” The word was a low warning from Zed’s spot at the table.

She rolled her eyes and took a deep drink of wine, but she spoke no more.

You couldn’t care less about this conversation. What Taehyung’s father did was none of your business, they could all go drown and you wouldn’t think about it twice—or once— for that matter.

You always pondered Jiyeon’s and Zed’s relationship though. They did appear to find each other annoying, Zed would talk shit about Jiyeon sometimes and so would she. But then you figure, most of these insiders weren’t really friends with each other, they just existed in the same place at the same time. Much like now. Including yourself.

Jin—your only actual friend among these people— was sitting next to you though hadn’t said a word, except for some oddly-timed chuckling. His mind was clearly traveling somewhere else.

Trevor was apparently already devouring his third stake. Making another rude remark towards the house server while downing what seemed to be a liter of Syrah wine all by himself.

And then there was Celine. Whom you knew was the person that tolerated you less from here and didn’t care about not making it obvious.

Celine was your polar opposite. Where you were quiet, she spoke with abandon and laughed loudly. Where you were demure, well . . . she’d stuck her gum to her cloth napkin before eating her pasta, twirling it around the fork at least a hundred times to make sure nothing was getting spilled on her precious dress.

Low chatter and the scraping of silverware filled the yard, but beneath that lay a tense air that wouldn’t dissipate, an uncomfortable vibe the breeze wouldn’t take with it. Everyone seemed to be easily chatting amongst themselves, so maybe it was just you. You tried to brush it off.

Jiyeon —despite Zed’s orders— didn’t stay quiet for long, though she no longer spoke about insider business gossip. She changed the subject to horse racing. That was an acceptable conversation many joined in on.

However you couldn’t help but think about the question Taehyung had made.

“Why are you here?”

Why were you here? Hashfield is a cold shallow place that’s filled with people you don’t like. Their view of the world was so superficial, human relationships were glib, basically meaningless. No one cared what values their friend had, as long as they had more than five cars on their parking lot.

You couldn’t be more different. Your favourite literary period was the Romantic for crying out loud. . .and it was the same for music and art. There was something about the music from the Romantic period which enamoured you. Genuine emotions came through the music. Every time you listened to Chopin, something rooted inside you pushed you to dance. Perhaps the expressiveness, emotions, and escapism were the factors that drew you towards the Romantic period. You wanted to waltz through a room, carefree. Your body moving along to one of Chopin’s masterpieces instead of sitting across from a bunch of insiders.

Maybe you were a coward, but you were glad you didn’t have to sit near Zed. You were carrying out this carefree facade all evening and had a polite response for anything—as inappropriate as the comments could sometimes be when insiders were drinking—but with him, words were at a loss for you. You felt tongue-tied around him, tilted off your point of gravity, and truthfully just embarrassed, as though a blush permanently warmed your skin. It might be unpleasant speaking to him, but it was too easy to look in his direction.

You cringed as you recall what had happened.

-One week ago, Clair’s party-

Your mother used to smoke at the kitchen table in her nightgown after she and your father would scream the house down. So, naturally, you’d picked up her habit of smoking during stressful times.

With your cheeks burning in anger and the cigarette in your hand, it wasn’t lost on you that the apple really doesn’t fall that fucking far from the tree. Kim Taehyung was a fucking asshole just like his father was rumored to be. But for whatever reason, you realize that you’re more mad at yourself for thinking the opposite for even a second.

You closed your eyes and mentally cursed at yourself when you saw Zed approach you.

“Kim Taehyung” Zed’s voice was a low growl “What a fucking idiot”

“Yeah Zed, I know. That bet was stupid and embarrassing and I’m sorry you got dragged down into it-“

“I mean—is he out of his mind? If I was really trying to fuck you I’d be working much harder, trust me. . . Who does he think he is? He thinks he’s better than me or something?”

Wow.

That was definitely not the reaction you were expecting. Zed was a fucking idiot. He’s obviously intoxicated— but you like to call alcohol the truth serum, so yeah, fuck him.

“Oh really? That’s what you’re so mad about? That you think you could fuck me first?” you let anger sip into your tone

Zed’s eyes widened in embarrassment when he realized his tongue had run faster than his brain “No, y/n look—“ he stammered “all I’m saying is he shouldn’t have placed that bet alright? I mean, I wouldn’t want to fuck you anyway”

You gave him a deadly stare

“That came out wrong! I’m sorry—all I’m trying to say is-“

“Honestly, I bet that whatever you’re trying to say isn’t even important, so how about you get out of my sight?”

Why was it such a surprise to you that Zed was as much of an asshole as the others?

You kept feeling naive lately.

Lunch continued with meaningless chatter, good food and drink, but the tension never dissipated. It sat there, uninterrupted. Like an echo before the words were even spoken.

You remember the first time you met Mina and Namjoon. They were both decently shy kids that gravitated towards each other because their mums were best friends. Seokjin came on later in the picture, Mina was skeptical about him at first because he was an insider, but his true colors surfaced and everyone realized he was a decent human being unlike the rest of them. Eventually, you four became close and the rest was history.

“Feels good to party outside the wall after so long huh?” Seokjin’s smile had basically reached his ears as he handed you a drink

“You can’t imagine” you quickly agreed “I’d forgotten people actually danced at parties”

“How did Mina manage to make such cool friends in Uni? I swear she self diagnosed herself with social anxiety last year.” Namjoon added

“I heard that, asshole” Mina suddenly made an appearance from Namjoon’s back. “And I promised my self I’d change unlike you” she downed what was left of her drink “You’ve made like… two new friends? And one of them is your cousin” she burst a laugh.

But her laughter soon faded away once she made eye contact with you “How are you doing?” She made a pause “Kim Taehyung. That asshole, I hope his house burns down or something.”

“He has like three whole mansions” you rolled your eyes and smiled at her

“Whatever” she took a sip

Four drinks in was when you decided that a bathroom break was more needed than you’d thought.

Stumbling a bit along the narrow hallway, you managed to find your way into the bathroom. To be fair, it was much easier to navigate a normal house as opposed to the three story mansions you were used to these past months.

“Ahh somebody would think you’re stalking me, angel“

Your heartbeats collided with a crash at the familiarity of the voice.

A burning rush of recognition ran down your spine as you met Jungkook’s heavy gaze. Brown doe eyes hugged by thick long eyelashes and a killer smile.

Jungkook was so much more dangerous than he looked. But that was what made him lethal. Because just by looking at those sweet eyes and that picture perfect smile, you wouldn’t be able to imagine how easy it would be for him to break your heart.

What was he even doing here? This was a one hour drive from Hashfield, and a party filled with people that didn’t really match his ‘status’.

You weren’t curious enough to ask.

“Move” was what you spat at him instead.

“Damn y/n. . . You’re breaking my heart”

Why had your name rolled of his tongue like he was more than familiar with it? Well you guess, because it was. . . Considering the fling you two had back in the day.

Another experience ruined by Kim Taehyung.

“Oh I’m sure you’ll get over it. Now, move”

He smiled.

An outrageous smile.

“Since when did you become such an ice queen?”

An even more outrageous question. “Uhh I don’t know, maybe since you and your little friends constantly fucked me over?” It’s ridiculous that you’re even talking to him right now, but somehow you couldn’t hold yourself back.

This hallway was narrow, narrower than you’d like. So when you tried to make your way past him, it was easy for him to pull you back with a simple hand movement.

He suddenly seemed to get ahold of his drunk self “Y/n about that… I just wanted to say I’m sorry, it was a shitty thing to do”

“Yeah, you think?” You don’t hold back the anger and bitterness sip into your tone, Jungkook deserved nothing less. “Let go”

An evil grimace formed, and the way he slightly came closer made your stomach drop. “I don’t really want to”

“I can smell the alcohol in your breath, Jungkook. Let go”

“I can assure you I’m very sober right now” he followed your order and took a step back, letting your hand slide down his fingers

You hadn’t talked to Jungkook since the whole fiasco between you him and Taehyung, yet this moment was enough to remind you the pull he had on you.

An annoying pull you had no control over.

“Y/n, I really am sorry. . . About everything”

You took a long sight, forgiving Jungkook for all the bullshit he’d done in the past was not on today’s to-do list. “Apologizing doesn’t take what you did back. It just puts me in a shitty position of having to decide wether you’re worth forgiving or not.”

“I know. I know. It’s selfish of me to say it now but uhm, I don’t think I’d get another chance so…”

“I get it, but I don’t think I’m ready to forgive you Jungkook.” You breathed in a shallow breath as you walked passed him and got into the bathroom.

It was the right thing to do. Jungkook was not the person you needed to talk to right now.

You closed your eyes and the mumbled music brought you back to the last time you had actually talked to him.

Outfield central club, two years ago

“I’m telling you pink brings out your eyes you should wear it more often” you jokingly pushed his shoulder. Jungkook didn’t need any color to bring out his eyes, they did a fine job being the center of attention on their own.

He smiled and pulled you closer by grabbing your waist. A signature move of his, you’d wondered how many girls had fallen for that trick. “There you go, romanticizing me again” he stood still but his eyes burned with intensity. “It’s too late for me, angel. I destroy everything beautiful that comes into my life”

That was not entirely wrong.

Sure, you and Jungkook had become extremely close this past year, the closest you’d been with an insider besides SeokJin and well, Kim Taehyung. But you felt comfortable around him, playboy reputation aside, there were times when he seemed genuine, sincere and kind.

Despite his rumors, Jungkook was not a bad person, which is surprising considering he hanged out with the devil himself, Kim Taehyung.

You and Jungkook clicked. You liked the same bands, enjoyed the same movies felt the same way when Jenna Jones and Brandy broke up. (She was too good for him)

“I don’t believe that. I think you’ve just convinced yourself that your not worth something serious because when you start to really care about someone it scares you”

His eyes got bigger “I care about you, and I’m not all that scared”

Gosh with the way he was smiling right now he had to have known how much you’d been crushing over him this past year.

You sighted. You wanted to put a chink in the ice he wore like armor. Stepping closer you ran a finger across his jawline, your voice soft “You have such a handsome face. Does it always get you everything you want?”

“Almost”

There was something so significant about that single word it put a hitch in your breath. “I bet one look from you can make women swoon at your feet”

He grow, probably annoyed that you brought up his popularity again. “Yet here you stand, perfectly not swooned”

You laughed lightly “Oh I wouldn’t say that”

He stared down at you.

You stared up at him.

As a corner of his lips lifted, You realized you were amusing him. “What?” You broke the silence

“Nothing” he shook his head “I shouldn’t really be here, Taehyung would kill me”

“What does Taehyung have to do with this?” You said firmly. Pretending the mere mention of his name didn’t bring your blood to boil.

“He’s just weird about me talking with you. He thinks we shouldn’t mix” he let out a breath

“We? As in. . . outsiders and insiders?”

He was a fucking asshole

“Cmon angel. . . You know how he is”

“Well, fuck him” You said, trying to take a step back, but his hand went to your lower back and drifted to the top of your ass. Your stomach tightened with unease.

Jungkook had always been subtly inappropriate—his fingers just grazing things they shouldn’t. Close enough to make you pleasantly uncomfortable, but not too close to where it would be considered something. If he went further, would you be able to handle it?

Jungkook pulled back to look you in the eye, but his hand didn’t leave you. Something crawled under your skin. You realized at this moment why you couldn’t escape the spell he seemed to have everyone under.

He buried his head on your neck before pulling back again “I could smell you all day, you know that?”

You stared at his big bright innocent eyes. Jungkook was the picture perfect son, or that’s what every magazine wrote, at least. He was kind and flirty to everyone, and could make every person in the room feel happy just by flashing a smile. That’s why he was so popular in the media. But what you found the most intriguing about his appearance, however, was the dark ink that showed through his white dress shirt. It was vague, but you thought it went all the way from his shoulder to the gold watch on his wrist. Jeon Jungkook had a full sleeve. You knew that «good kid» look was all smoke and mirrors.

He was looking at you as if he’d felt you observing him “I feel like you get lost in that head of yours sometimes” his smile was a soft one, the one he’d flash the paparazzi sometimes when he wanted to take an innocent looking picture.

“What can I say, thinking is my favorite hobby” you joked

“So. . . what do you think about me?” That smile never left his face

That you’re dangerous “I can be honest?”

“Please be”

“I was skeptical about you at first, I mean, your crowd, you know, they don’t have the best reputation, especially amongst outsiders. But as I got to know you, I’ve found that you’re the best exception to the rule ever”

“I am?” His eyes looked as if he’d succeeded at something

“Yeah, you are” your pulse leapt into your throat at the thought of your next words “I think I really like you, Jungkook—”

His name wasn’t even properly out of your mouth yet his lips locked on top of yours. He sucked slightly on your bottom lip, and he tasted as sweet as his reputation had been.

It was two days later that Taehyung had told everyone Jungkook hitting on you was a total prank.

You felt destroyed, defeated, because you had honestly fallen for Jungkook, but the disgust took every single feeling away. It took over your body for months, and you cried it out until you felt numb to it.

How shitty does a person have to be to do that? Yet how easily could you forget everything Taehyung had done to you? Your mind took you back to the «sober corner» and reminded you of everything you and Taehyung did together. But mostly what was more fucked up was how intense your feelings were for him. A person that never did right by you.

You closed your eyes shut and with a deep breath you let all the anger wash out of you. You decided that the pitty party was over as you had a very real party waiting for you on the other side of that door.

• • •

It had maybe hit four when Namjoon had finished throwing up for the third time tonight.

“What do you think y/n? Three or four months of teasing for this?” Mina bumped you in the shoulder

“I don’t know Mins” you let a laugh out “Let him live a little, he’s had a rough week”

So had you.

“You turned soft y/n, is it the change of the wall?” She teased

“Oh yes! Cause being around insiders all day turns me into such a softie!”

She chuckled at that but after a moment her eyes turned serious “You sure you don’t want to talk bout it?”

“Mina, don’t” you warned “Talking about it won’t change anything”

“It might change how you feel”

“I doubt it” You faked a smile, knowing Mina wouldn’t buy it anyway “So tell me all about that guy from the Kim’s firm!! What was his name? C something? It definitely had an E there was well—”

“Cedric, his name is Cedric” she rolled her eyes “Yeah well, I think he likes me. . . I mean he was aallll over me earlier” she smiled to herself.

“Well duh!!” You made a noise of acknowledgment, not surprised it had taken her this long to come to that assumption. The obvious was like a well hidden secret in Mina’s eccentric mind. Surprising, as she’d always aced her schoolwork, read people like a morning paper and had more friends than you could ever hope for.

“And I kept thinking, maybe there’s a reason he manspreads so much? He is big. Then I began to worry, so I started looking up pictures—well, videos—of men his size, naked, and that only made me worry more.”

“You were watching porn.” You said, deadpan, leaning by the side of Seokjin’s car while he fed Namjoon what seemed to be a hotdog? Where did he even get that?

She tilted her head “Yeah, I guess that’s what it’s called.��� She turned around and followed your gaze “Okay where the hell did he get that hotdog from? I’m starving”

“Mina!! Hello? You were watching. . .” You lowered your voice “porn, for a guy? To like what? Prepare yourself? See if he’d fit?” A laugh escaped you but when Seokjin shot you a glare you turned it into a cough.

“Anywayyyys” she said as she opened the car door “Speaking of Cedric, I’ve got news!”

“Oh” was what you said when you got in the car, guessing the next sentence that’d come out of her mouth wasn’t going to be your favorite thing in the world.

“The Kim and Arden family are trying to make the engagement official”

“Trying…?”

“Jesus y/n, you’re living under a rock. Too many books not enough TV”

“You’re going to be a great mum” you chuckled

“Taehyung is literally all over the media, apparently some paparazzi interviewed him on the street last night, he said, and I quote! What my father wants is non of my business, I would rather eat a bag of dirt” she stopped “A bag. Of. Dirt.” she jerked her head backwards laughing “Listen, I don’t like the dude, but he’s got balls”

Relief shouldn’t be what you’re feeling right now. “I see” you tried to sound indifferent, because that was the acceptable reaction, but something pounded inside of you.

“I mean, acting up like that? In front of cameras? ANNND against his dad’s word? Makes you wonder why he’s so against it, doesn’t it?”

You rolled your eyes “What are you implying, Mina?”

She had a puppy look on her face “Nothing! Nothing! I’m just sayinggg”

“He’s young, and a massive playboy” you sounded more angry than you should “He obviously doesn’t want to be caged like a pup. Besides, he can’t tolerate Brianna for more than a second”

“And you know that because…?” Mina was obviously teasing.

Fuck. “Well, you know he told me, Mina.”

Of course Mina knew, but Seokjin, who was driving, and Namjoon, who was sitting on the edge of the passenger sit looking out the window probably contemplating life and why he had so much to drink today, didn’t exactly know the details between you and Taehyung. And you’d like to keep it that way.

There was a silence “I know I was stupid to trust him okay? I just—“

“It’s not your fault, y/n” Seokjin’s voice made an appearance “It’s not your fault he’s an asshole.”

“I know, I get it”

“So all that anger, don’t place it on yourself” Namjoon’s voice was barely audible

“Sorry are we still talking about y/n or are you talking about your alcohol problem? Because I’m a little confused” Mina snorted, she was always the one to tease Namjoon yet she took care of him the most out of all of us.

You rolled down the window, allowing the autumn air to flow through the car. It was a beautiful night, the starriest it had been for a while now. Cold air brushed your skin as you drove back to Outfield, gazing the wall from afar and that’s all you used to do, but now you know the other side of it very well. In fact, you were more familiar with it than you’d like. Bitterness crawled up your throat.

Toward the end of November, the bet was long forgotten and everyone and their mother was focused on Taehyung’s so called engagement, or rather, the lack of it.

You didn’t care. Focusing on schoolwork was far more important. . .Or that’s at least the lies you’d been feeding yourself.

It was hard to avoid it, considering it was all everyone talked about. The Arden and Kim family were arguably Hashfield’s founding families, the possibility of those two historic houses merging had everyone on edge.

Well, except Taehyung, apparently.

Ever since the scandal interview he gave about a month ago, Kim Taehyung seemed to do the opposite of what his father wanted. According to Claire, there had been a succession of crushes, flings, one night stands, who knows. To you all of it boiled down to one thing only: his cock had been everywhere. It had been in god knows how many vaginas, how many mouths.

Without your concern, your gaze found him. The amphitheater was big enough, so he shouldn’t notice.

The image disgusted you. It bothered you to think of him between a girl’s legs as she lay facing him, his broad, tanned, glistening shoulders moving up and down. Just looking at his shoulders when he happened to be going over his notes made you wonder where they’d been last night. How effortless and free the movement of his shoulder blades each time he shifted, how thoughtlessly they caught the sun. Did they taste of the sea to the woman who had lain under him last night and bitten into him? Or of his suntan lotion?

You remembered the last time you’d seen his shoulders all exposed under the sun. It was three years a go, near the end of your friendship.

You were in your mother’s garden, he’d stop by to bring you a Nintendo for your birthday. You tried to tell him that you were going to be a junior this year and that he should cut it with the kid stuff, but you’d secretly wished for that Nintendo so badly.

“Listen, I need to pick up something in town.” he said.

Something was always weed.

“And here I was, thinking you came down to Outfield for my birthday”

He sat silently a moment. “I did.” cleared his throat “Want to come with me? It’s been a while since we rode our bikes together”

“Now?” What you might have meant was, Really?

“Why, have you got anything better to do?”

“No.”

“So let’s go.”

Kim Taehyung, billionaire, Kim Taehyung, riding on a bike instead of his panamera just because you’d convinced him it was fun two years ago was the funniest sight, ever.

When you arrived at the garage, Amir, was arguing with Kadir, as usual.

This time he was accusing him of dousing the tomatoes with too much water, and that it was all wrong, because they were growing too fast.

“They’ll be mealy,” Amir complained.

“Listen. I do the tomatoes, you do the driving, and we’re all happy.”

“You don’t understand. In my day you moved the tomatoes at some point, from one place to another, from one place to the other”—he insisted—“and you planted basil nearby. But of course you people who’ve been in the army know everything.”

Their heavy accents made everything a little lighter.

“That’s right.” Kadir was ignoring him.

“Of course I’m right. No wonder they didn’t keep you in the army.”

“That’s right. They didn’t keep me in the army.”

Both of them greeted the two of you. The gardener handed Taehyung his weed. “You have a familiar face kid. Ever since the first day you came out here, I’ve seen you before, I’m sure of it. Did you work in a farm nearby perhaps?”

A laugh escaped your lips at the thought of Kim Taehyung being a farmer, maybe in another life. Of course Kadir had seen Tae’s face hanging in magazines or blasted through the daily talking show, but he couldn’t exactly pin point it.

Taehyung caught your smiled and after eyeing you smiled back.

Amir couldn’t have been more peeved. “No farmer dresses like that, are you stupid? From now on, I talk to customers you grow the tomatoes”

Kadir gave a wry smile.

Once you two had reached the cypress lane that led onto the main road to town, you asked Tae, “Doesn’t he give you the creeps?”

“Who?”

“Amir.”

“No, why? I fell the other day on my way back and scraped myself pretty badly. Amir insisted on applying some sort of witch’s brew. He also fixed the bike for me.” With one hand on the handlebar he lifted his shirt and exposed a huge scrape and bruise on his left hip.

“Still gives me the creeps,” You said, repeating your aunt’s verdict.

“Just a lost soul, really.”

Lost soul.

On your way, you noticed that Tae was taking his time. He wasn’t in his usual rush, no speeding, no scaling the hill with his usual athletic zeal. Nor did he seem in a rush to go back to his precious wall, or join his new friends on the beach.

He’d been spending a lot of time with a new crowd, you didn’t really know them, nor were you interested. Rich snobby kids from far inside the wall, probably best to avoid them. It kind of bugged you that Tae had started hanging out with them so much, but you wouldn’t bring yourself to say anything.

Today he’d spend almost the entire day with you, perhaps he had nothing better to do.

When you arrived at the small café that overlooked the sea, Tae stopped to buy cigarettes. He had started smoking Gauloises. You had never tried Gauloises and asked if you could. He took out a cerino from the box, gently placed the cigarette in between your lips and by cupping his hands very near your face, lit your cigarette.

“Not bad, right?” he said after you took a puff

“Not bad at all.”

He didn’t like the fact that you’d picked up smoking, but he wasn’t any better so he decided not to scold you about it anymore.

“Just take a look at this,” he said as the two of you ambled with your bikes in the afternoon sun toward the edge of the café overlooking the rolling hills below.

Farther out and way below was a magnificent view of the sea with scarcely a few stripes of foam streaking the bay like giant dolphins breaking the surf. “Do you know about the wailing woman?” he asked suddenly.

“She threw her husband in the sea, thinking he was dead, but he had just been asleep for days due to some medication. He ended up drowning from the waves”

“You heard how she died?”

“The next night she took a bunch of sleeping pills and threw herself in the sea to drown as well” You replied and studied his pondering face.

“Do you know why she did that?”

“Because she thought that, if she died the same way her husband did, she’d meet him in the afterlife.”

Why was he quizzing you?

“Is there anything you don’t know?” he asked, his eyes a light caramel from the sun.

“I know nothing, Tae. Nothing, just nothing.”

“You know more than anyone around here.Anyone I’ve ever met”

Why was he returning your near-tragic tone with bland ego-boosting?

“If you only knew how little I know about the things that really matter.” you replied

“What kind of things?” It was as if he was starring down into your soul

How much you wanted to touch his hair which was slightly ruffled by the passing wind. How much you wanted him to come even closer, maybe enough to hear how fast your heart beat every time he was near you.

Tell him. It’s now or never.

Is it better to speak, or to die? “Nothing.”

You were treading water, trying neither to drown nor to swim to safety, just staying in place, because here was the truth—even if you couldn’t speak the truth, or even hint at it, yet you could swear it lay around the two of you, the way they say that if a necklace gets lost while swimming: You know it’s down there somewhere.

You focus back to the class. On the Present day, when Taehyung was just a mere asshole to you, nothing else. You hopefully averted your eyes fast enough so that he didn’t notice you staring at him for what was probably fifteen minutes now.

This class was boring, you blame the weariness that washed over you for the flashbacks you were having about him.

That version of Taehyung was long dead to you.

@nikkiordonez12 @travelleratheart101 @theaufanartist @world-moon @ratedbangtann @chimchoom @pnkoo @taehyungedd @turnthepageandbeburnt @glitteryouid @jkbangtan7 @chimchoom @thankyoublair @manuosorioh

[veeparkersstuff]

"You. Will. Fear. Me" -Jungkook as Springtrap🐰

💚BTS as Five Nights At Freddy's characters according to ChatGPT💚

(Like or reblog, don't repost pls!👻)

[tkvkfanfics]

𝐋𝐎𝐕𝐄 𝐈𝐍 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐋𝐈𝐌𝐄𝐋𝐈𝐆𝐇𝐓

!!! CHAPTER 6

ꜱᴜᴍᴍᴀʀʏ ↝ Taehyung was painfully aware of the truth; life was never free. Every decision he made had a consequence, and it seemed clear what price he would have to pay if someone got to know about the true character of his and Jungkook's relationship. However, he had come this far and there was no turning back or throwing it away. Sadly, he wasn't too brave either.

↝ Taehyung's and Jungkook's relationship right under the nose of obviousness.

ᴘᴀɪʀɪɴɢꜱ ↝ taekook, idol⥏ taehyung x idol⥏ jungkook ↝ idol⥏ taehyung x original male character ↝ straight namjoon ↝ namjin, idol⥏ namjoon x idol⥏ seokjin ↝ idol⥏ seokjin x original male character

ʀᴀᴛɪɴɢ ⥏ ᴡᴀʀɴɪɴɢ ↝ mature 18+ ↝ angst, homophobia, explicit sexual content, self-realisation

ᴛᴀɢꜱ ⥏ ɢᴇɴʀᴇ ↝ secret relationship, slow-burn, awkward first times, awkward romance, complicated friendships, taehyung forgets he should play a detective, ↝ idolsAU, BTS 2016

ꜱᴏᴜɴᴅᴛʀᴀᴄᴋ

ᴀᴘᴏʟᴏɢʏ

It was official, Jimin wasn’t speaking to him. Not even acknowledging Taehyung’s desperate looks and gestures to talk it out. Jungkook had been right all along; the longer they avoided talking about it, the harder it would be to resolve their issues. The situation was already complicated enough, and Taehyung couldn't help feeling guilty for being frustrated with Jimin's silent treatment.

And Jungkook’s reassures that Jimin was too shit-faced, as if that was the right way how to speak about his hyung, to remember anything, weren’t helping at all. Because why else would Jimin scoff every time Taehyung as much as mentioned Jungkook’s name even if it was something as innocent as answering who he thought was the cutest member among them?

Taehyung just didn’t understand Jungkook’s calmness, as if it wasn’t him with his dick out and lewd expression spread across his face while his hips were moving in the rhythm of Taehyung’s hand, when Jimin’s voice pushed into their intimate space all of sudden.

He didn’t believe his friend was fighting with the headache that came as an outcome of his poor drinking habits, as Jungkook suggested, either. Because whose hangover lasted for over a week?

Taehyung was about to look over his shoulder, but stopped at Jungkook’s low grunt when his head, resting on his chest, moved, but his eyes remained closed, only a wrinkle between his eyebrows deepened and his lips pouted, as if the middle of Taehyung’s chest wasn’t as comfortable as the place right under his left collarbone. Taehyung could feel the sharp metal, he knew was adoring Jungkook’s ears, as a hard stud pressing against his sternum and he smiled when he noticed the second earring from the pair glistening in the glow of the setting sun.

Taehyung liked to lose track of time watching the grey-blue sky changing into bright orange, waiting patiently until the stars weren't visible above the city, but experiencing the performance while caressing the clouds was his most favourite so far. Surrounded by the shaky walls of the plane cabin, the time surely stopped making sense. What if they were stuck in the never-ending second?

He could have left his eyes on the hills of white and his mind tasting the imagination, yet the sound hitting the back of his seat again painted everything in ashen tones, falling on his ears like intrusive hues of electric blue and red. Distracting. Taehyung didn’t know since when he could sense colours behind the tones, but they felt like a halo glowing around the sound. Most of the time, Taehyung felt frustrated with his own world, or more with the inability to explain and lack of understanding. He always deserved, or that was what society made him feel, a double look when the words that made someone stop to think, left his mouth.

Taehyung noticed Jimin's eyes narrowing as he peered into the dim corners of their cramped surroundings. He couldn't tell if Jimin was watching him through the gap between their seats, or inspecting the way the light faded into shadows. Either way, it reminded Taehyung of Yoongi's judging gaze, more than Jimin's usual cold, unimpressed stare. The slight clucking noise Jimin made with his tongue added to Taehyung's nerves as he shifted in his seat. It seemed like even without words, the disapproval in Jimin's eyes was enough to make Taehyung feel fidgety. Jimin usually craved resolution after his stubbornness faded into the loneliness of a passing time.

Their gazes met and even before the white flickered between the brown of Jimin’s pupils as he rolled his eyes, Taehyung could sense the same vivid hues of intense blue, glowing through the tension, locating the guilt inside his soul. It was the tension itself.  Sensing the opportunity, Taehyung could feel his lips parting.

“Ji-”

He thought this was also what Jimin was waiting for, the peace and place, and the quiet cabin of the plane, kidnapping them from the time they could spend with their families during this holiday season, where everyone’s snores were the sounds of their exhaustion, seemed to be the right time.

But a low sleepy hum, vibrating through his chest and down to his stomach, where it spread the warm brown comfort, slammed his teeth together before the emotional whisper of “-min,” could get Jimin’s attention.

Taehyung looked down at where the seed of safety and love was planted and found Jungkook moving his head, nuzzling under his chin for relief after waking up.

“Are we there yet?” he grunted lowly, the rasp of his voice sent chills down Taehyung’s spine, before his eyes opened and he pulled out an eyebrow over the blemish white on the grey fabric of the hoodie Taehyung was wearing. “This is mine,” Jungkook said, but his tone was lacking the accusation. He fisted the thin material around the zipper and let it go again. Distracting, the way Taehyung could feel Jungkook’s nails scrapping on his skin through his clothing, was distracting.

When Taehyung turned his head to look at Jimin’s face through the gap again, he found him with a sleeping mask over his eyes, resting his head on the backrest of his seat. Taehyung sighed.

Taehyung was happy to have Jungkook’s eyes and touch on him again, after the phone, glued to the boy’s attention during the morning, had stolen him from his arms. It was nothing like Taehyung to wish they could turn off the aeroplane mode on their devices, so Jungkook could busy himself with whoever’s messages were competing with his quick responses again. All the pettiness, coming from neglect and resulting in him throwing Jungkook’s favourite piece of clothing over his shoulders for attention, forgotten in order to speak to Jimin.

“I have been wearing it since morning,” even if Taehyung’s voice wasn’t tinted with disbelief and a sprinkle of annoyance, the remark had to be strange enough as Jungkook’s head was no longer a weight over Taehyung’s heart.

“Have you?” Jungkook wondered aloud and as soon as his curious fingers got lost on Taehyung’s clothed body, probably smoothing out the creases his head had left, Taehyung pushed Jimin to the back of his mind.

Something about the silence surrounding his and Jimin’s relationship provoked him to argue loudly to fill out the void with noise and distraction. Taehyung was chasing the neon red, not noticing it substituted for anger.

“I am serious,’ he said, crossing his arms over his chest only to pull at the same fabric Jungkook was running his eyes over, ‘I’ve stolen this from your closet, and you notice now?”

Taehyung watched as the corners of Jungkook's lips twitched, biting down the traces of amusement, he leaned his head against his seat, mimicking Jimin's gesture without knowing, he chuckled softly, “You are jealous,” Jungkook said as if he could read through the memories active at the front of Taehyung's brain. Jungkook's hand reached out. It felt flat on Taehyung's belly, right under his folded arms and he drummed his fingers, testing Taehyung's weak abdomen muscles under the stolen hoodie. “My mum would be flattered,” Taehyung saw how a laugh bobbed with Jungkook's throat but before it could spread his mouth wide and show his teeth, it blended with his subtle teasing.

“What?”

The digits knocking their own rhythm on Taehyung's most vulnerable place stopped, to think about another melody. This new one seemed to play on the background of Jungkook's heavy sigh, “I promised mum to visit them on the eighth. She said hyung with her are already there.” Jungkook's shoulders slumped as soon as he mentioned his brother along with his long-term girlfriend.

Taehyung knew better than anyone else how draining and not worth it felt for Jungkook to compete against the mental shadows his older brother, the favourite child in his parent's eyes, was casting. Junghyung seemed to be everything Jungkook was not; a model student, constantly striving for the greatest, proudly wearing the shiny batch pinned to his sweater in the least subtle way. He was also a devoted son, softly kissing his mother's cheek every holiday season or in between. And now, from what Jungkook had told him, he was prepared to marry the love of his, and his mother's life.

“I left a text before going to bed last night, that I wouldn't be able to make it, hoping she would read it when we are on the plane. But well...” the laugh he was restraining for so long finally found its way out in a burst of something that tasted bitter in the air. The underlying pain in Jungkook's voice awoken a regret pushing Taehyung’s words and actions under the shameful light. He should have known, the atmosphere of the approaching New Year (Seollal) could be sensed in everyone’s mood for weeks now; ever since January started to bend down its last days.

The holiday season had always been the hardest for them, as nothing could brighten up the reality better, or maybe worse, than fireworks of celebrations hammering their colours behind their back and on photographs where longing was present in their families' eyes. Not even the best editors could fill up the hole their absence had left, no matter how convincing the photoshopped pictures looked.

“Kookie, I am sorry,” started Taehyung.

“Hyung, it’s fine. It’s not your fault you have a loving family. Your mother probably wouldn’t even mind if you introduced,” suddenly he halted, looking down at their intertwined fingers on Taehyung’s stomach. Taehyung followed his gaze, wondering if the warmth of his palm and grip of his fingers was Jungkook's silent seek for comfort and reassurance. Without thinking, Taehyung gently squeezed Jungkook’s hand, holding it tighter in his own. “Me, when we are as old as Jin hyung.”

It was at that moment, with their hearts beating in sync, that Taehyung suddenly realised the true reason behind Jungkook's undying desire to come out. Namjoon would be the first step.

“Jungkook-ah,’ called Taehyung and straightened his back, looking right at the younger's face, ‘don't tell me, all this time, you wanted to come out just to win this nonsense fight with your brother.”

He searched for answers in the depths of Jungkook's eyes, in his gaze fixated on their hands and on Taehyung's rising belly. And there, behind the lack of concern and what Taehyung understood as nonchalance in his posture, he saw vulnerability. Jungkook looked desperate to prove that he was not worse than Junghyung, that he too could bring someone home and be loved by his family.

Jungkook didn't respond for a while. He brought his bottom lip out, only to bite down on it right away. His eyes seemed to be flickering between the truth and the words of conviction he could offer to Taehyung.

“Kookie?” Taehyung murmured softly, his voice barely a whisper against the background hum of the plane cabin.

Finally, Jungkook let out a breath, he regained the strength in his voice hinting at protection, “Hyung, you don't have to worry. Have you forgotten what I told you? If you're not ready, I no longer want us to come out.” Only this time, Jungkook misread the crease between Taehyung's eyebrows or the dampness of his palms coated in cold sweat. Taehyung wasn't worried about himself.

“But the question is, hyung, would you do the same for me?”

For a moment, Taehyung allowed himself to return to his old fears, only to find out they had never quite faded. The ignorance only made them more radiant, blazing to the point he could feel them on his skin, melting the walls of protection, the truth of untold. Taehyung could never bring a boy to his parents’ house, lead him through the threshold of their acceptance.

“I...” he didn’t mean to hesitate, but he couldn’t let the truth free either.

Jungkook's fingers spread wide, he turned Taehyung's hand over and returned the squeeze; his grip gentle yet firm. “It’s alright, hyung,” he said simply, his eyes filled with love.

დ

The weather over Japan’s largest islands seemed to be made for today’s evening event. Taehyung remembered the encouraging blinks of stars wishing him the best of luck when he pressed gently on his ear to secure the in-ear monitor and with the countdown of the collected voice of the audio engineer, he took the first smooth step to open tonight’s performance. Jungkook’s hand, hidden in the shadow of his back, patted his butt slightly, stealing his breath but pushing the flush over his make-up, bringing a bit of colour to his whitewashed face. Taehyung looked around but Jungkook’s jacket was already swishing past him, the cold wind filled Taehyung’s lungs with fresh cheering. Hoseok by his left squatted down as soon as Jungkook sneaked a thumb-up behind his back pointing towards the sky with his readiness all while Taehyung’s heart was soaring, filling his chest with pride. He loved him with such intensity that it felt almost physical, every fibre of his being was becoming stronger just to endure the feeling. Witnessing Jungkook's confidence grow with each of their show charged him with such joy that he wanted to scream from the rooftops. He could do so now, the manifestation of his happiness would be covered by the audience. He chose to smirk instead and pushing one knee forward he sat on the heel of his other foot lowering himself to Jimin’s level who was already leaning over his bent knees, heels on the floor. When darkness faded into light, hugging Jungkook’s alone figure in the middle of the big stage, the boy’s back reflected on the surface of Jimin’s eyes before it switched into determination with one blink. Jimin’s fingers flexed, a subtle betrayal of his restlessness that didn’t go unnoticed by Taehyung’s attentive eye. He knew Jimin wanted tonight to go smoothly, just as everyone else.

Two songs in, everyone noticed but they chose to ignore when Jin’s voice broke in the middle of the verse. His cheeks turned pink and his hand shot up to scratch his neck, but as the melody of their song continued to push the excited screams out of the people’s throats, he had to swallow the burning ache scraping inside his neck. When Jin’s fingers brushed past Taehyung’s in the midst of the spin, Taehyung’s hand lingered, longer than the fast rhythm allowed him to, longer than when he felt at the top of his spirit to tease. A tight supporting squeeze stretched a tired smile on Jin’s lips, but left Taehyung three steps behind.

In the corner of his eye, Taehyung saw Jimin lifting up his hand to fix the microphone hitting his chin with his every jump. He stuck out his tongue to wet his lips before he opened his mouth and as the rehearsed lines made the teenage girls in the front row put a hand over their hearts over Jimin’s sweet angelic voice, he hovered his foot over the stage floor, his arms followed in a graceful, elegant sweep, as if tracing an invisible arc through the air, the palm of his right hand was meant to connect with Taehyung’s over their hands to form a heart shape. Taehyung was already late, throwing his body while his legs took a jump, he wasn’t sure why he suddenly hesitated, throwing off the carefully choreographed harmony. Jimin, expecting the presence of fingers curling around his wrist, found himself alone in the spotlight, their movements out of sync. Taehyung’s misstep was subtle, almost unnoticeable to an untrained eye, but within the dynamics of the group, it spoke volumes. 

The big smile turning Jimin’s eyes into two lines wavered and when he turned around, curling his body until it didn’t disappear behind Yoongi’s confidently approaching figure, already spitting out his powerful words, the shape of Jimin’s teeth became visible under his skin as he pursed his lips. Taehyung couldn’t chase away the grimace for the rest of the song.

დ

Taehyung could not only feel the buckets of hot sweat pouring down his back and front, but as it seeped through his clothes and stuck them to his flushed skin, he could smell it in his nose. He needed to sit down, a minute would be enough, his body was whispering to him, but at the same time, he knew if he let his knees bend, feet rest and lungs exhale, he would not be able to finish, not even continue. So he kept on pacing, walking in a circle, with his hands on his hips and head resting low on his neck, making the life of the girl they had hired as a make-up artist impossibly harder.

“Don’t overdo it,” warned them Namjoon five songs before, pulling his tank top up to hide his collarbones, before the eruption of excited screams under the light had sent them to their routine. However, as Taehyung glanced at Namjoon now, leaning over his trembling knees while another girl was jumping frantically around him with a hand fan, Taehyung felt a sudden need to scoff.

“Hyung, slow down,” Jungkook had whispered to him when they met in the middle of the stage, moving like one man. Taehyung remembered throwing him a half-reassuring smile before the next tones of a song had separated them again. But Jungkook was on his knees now, only his shaking shoulders were keeping him from kissing the dirty floor. Taehyung could hear his breathy whimpers while Jimin, purposefully maintaining eye contact with Taehyung;  the screams of their fans seemed to fade into the background as Taehyung and Jimin held each other's gaze, was gently pressing ice packs at the back of his neck and forehead.

It had been quite some time since Taehyung’s legs had given up under him, turning his previously functional limbs into long, useless tubes flailing helplessly around his body. He didn’t plan to faint tonight, he was confident that even if his mind shut off, his muscles would continue to guide his footwork flawlessly.

A small and fluffy, but powdery, bristles of make-up brush were patting at his nose, masking the natural glow of his skin and a mole at the tip of his nose under the matted layer of something creamy and skin-toned. Taehyung lifted his hand, attempting to wave it away, but another one, slim, cold and somehow shaky grasped him around his wrist.

“V-ssi,” sighed the make-up girl impatiently, pinning his arm back to his hip. She let out a tired exhale, dragging her feet from the sofa to the wall and from the wall back to the sofa, following Taehyung's back. “Can you please stay still? I can't work properly if you keep moving around like that,” she scolded him, her frustration seeping through the gentle tone they advised her to approach the idols with.

“This is taking forever. Just finish up quickly,” Taehyung muttered, his impatience breaking through. The makeup girl paused, looking at him with a mix of surprise and irritation. Only Taehyung couldn't, he ran a hand through his hair, damped with sweat, hesitating before an uncalled anger, coming as a product of exhaustion, could snap at the innocent girl trying to earn good money any further. He knew he would be bathing in toxic guilt while the sheets of his hotel bed would be trying to bring him comfort a few hours later.

“Taehyung-ah!” Namjoon called out, his voice tinted with a hint of relief as he finally gained control over the sweet unconsciousness hovering with a threat above him. Taehyung’s expression remained annoyed, he couldn't even force a smile on his lips as he jerked his head towards the sound of the voice.

Namjoon was sitting on the floor, his knees bent on either side of his body, his ankles moving in half circles, letting free a quiet pop every time they reached their range limit. “Can I talk to you real quick?” Taehyung noticed the white traces of saliva, dried with water around Namjoon's mouth, breaking into cracks as he spoke.

The girl still dancing on her tiptoes around Taehyung fell on her heels in defeat. She pulled at the corner of the black cloth she threw over his shoulders earlier, and it slid off his body. Taehyung let her leave, collecting her make-up products, before he reached for the nearly empty plastic bottle and squatted down to his hyung, balancing close to the floor unsteadily. Namjoon's expression turned grateful as he tightly gripped the bottle, it made a sharp crunching sound under the pressure of his fingers wrapping around the plastic. He took deep gulps of the refreshing liquid, some of which dribbled down his chin.

“Hyung, I didn’t mean to be rude, but I won’t say sorry when she,’ Taehyung’s body followed the sharp jerk of his shoulder, pointing towards the girl looking around the chaos if someone didn’t need her help, ‘doesn’t know how it feels. You understand me hyung, right? I can’t sit down or else... or else.” It felt odd turning his thoughts to the voice-out words already past his tongue.

Taehyung nearly missed the lingering gaze Namjoon had left over his shoulder and even if a surprise prodded his curiosity when Namjoon said, “This is not about Wooyeong noona,” (because since when was Namjoon not only familiar but also close with the staff, Taehyung was sure he had never seen the girl’s face before), the next words falling on his ears made it irrelevant, “You need to get it together, Taehyung-ah,’ Namjoon was speaking with an impatience blended with disappointment in his tone, ‘Whatever is going on between you two, you are both professionals for fuck’s sake.”

Taehyung's muscles tensed, it was a primal reaction, he built up his defence with attack locking his body. He glanced over at Jimin, still uncomfortably close - as if he was provoking him - to Jungkook who was holding himself on his elbows and toes. The fabric of the dark blue bag resting close to Jungkook’s hairline had to be warmed up by now, as Taehyung could not spot a single droplet running down his skin and to the collar of his jacket. But Jimin's palm was pressing down on the round white plastic lid sewed at the top nevertheless in his desperate attempt to keep Jungkook's overheating body under control.

Namjoon continued, “We've all been through tough times, personal or otherwise. But when we're out there, on that stage, we need to be a unit, Taehyung.” Jimin shot Taehyung a look, there was a distant glance in his eyes as if he was piercing through his physical form made of flesh, blood and bones and could see something beyond him. Taehyung turned around quickly to catch a glimpse of what Jimin saw, but only Namjoon's intense gaze met him.

“ARMYs look up to us, and it's our responsibility to give them our best. Whatever it is, sort it out later. Right now, focus on the performance.”

Taehyung could see Jungkook's lips moving, probably a breath of soft 'Thank you,' teased the bared skin of his own forearms while his eyelids fluttered, fighting to stay open. Straining against his own weight, he shifted onto his one arm -the sharpness of his elbow bored a mark in the exact shape into the rubber yoga mat- and reached for the blue ice pack pressed against the protruding bone of his neck, muttering something again. Jimin finally leaned backwards, sitting on his heels, he lightly tapped Jungkook's back, but hesitated at the sight of the skin exposed by his rolled-up shiny top. While Jungkook was using the playtime with blue creases of the ice bag as a distraction from the ache, Jimin said something with a gentle smile causing his eyebrows to rest on either side of his eyes. Taehyung noticed him gesture towards where Namjoon and himself were standing. Jungkook tensed at the motion, his tired shoulders becoming stiff...

“Are you listening at all?” Namjoon sighed with impatience, frustrated by Taehyung’s lack of focus.

Taehyung blinked, his mind snapping back to the present where Namjoon’s dry fingers were rubbing against each other in a loud snap in front of his face.

“Sorry hyung,” Taehyung murmured, subconsciously mirroring Jungkook’s movement of rubbing the back of his neck. “One unit, no fighting,’ he repeated, ‘I’ll try my best, hyung.” 

დ

Taehyunng swore he did his best. He could cover the left side of his chest with his palm, even pat it while the hollow sound of his palm meeting his body would be used as emphasis. He could yell the same if his throat didn’t feel so raw and his tongue too big for words to make any sense. He knew Namjoon would listen, he had already been watching Taehyung’s feet stomping their way down the stage stairs, stopping him on the last one with a hand on his shoulder. Taehyung remembered how his eyebrows lifted up but before he could voice out the question, the other members were hurrying them up, all of them ready to get rid of their sweat-drenched clothes and to crowd the cars taking them to their hotel.

“I tried!” cried out Taehyung, bending down to pick up the single pillow from his bed and burrow his face into the subtle floral scent of clean sheets in frustration. The whimpers of his stubborn truth could be heard along with another set of angry stomps.

Maybe the sound muted by the rug caused Hoseok to pop out his head from the bathroom door with hair still bubbly from the shampoo.

“Taehyung-ah, you alright?” he asked with a mix of concern and confusion. He brought his hand to scratch the side of his cheek, but suddenly paused and furrowed his brows. “You've got to be kidding me,’ Hoseok exclaimed, ‘I just shaved this morning!”

Taehyung’s head snapped up, the movement so sharp and unexpected that his hands were too slow to catch the pillow falling to his still lifting feet. Hoseok’s eyes looked too red from the hair product irritation, glistening as a white creamy substance on his eyelashes, to notice something rushing through the air, but a thud got his attention again and he squinted at the blurry figure standing a few feet away from him. He repeated the same words.

“Yes, hyung,’ Taehyung's lips stretched into a forced smile, but a genuine one raised his mouth corners once he realised Hoseok could probably hardly recognise his nose from his eyes, ‘Go wash your hair. I’ll be fine, don’t worry.” He waved his hand dismissively, gesturing to the bathroom. “Just need a quick shower and some sleep.”

I am tired was an answer to every wonder or concern. I need a bath or hot water will do me good was an accepted form of solution, not questioned by anyone. Everyone knew it as a temporary band-aid to all the problems. While all of them were aware of its true excuse origin, they continued to use it, trapped in the circle of avoidance.

“Ah,’ chuckled Hoseok awkwardly, patting his hair full of white foam, ‘this may take a while. Noona said I should let it sit for ten minutes before washing it out,” he bit down on his bottom lip apologetically, careful not to collect the purple shampoo on his tongue.

“But I heard Jungkookie already took a shower before dinner. He has room to himself, remember?” Taehyung didn’t think Hoseok noticed the way his shoulders slumped nor how his lips pushed forward in a pout, but that was just who Hoseok was - always good at reading emotions and offering solutions. “I don’t think he would say no to you.” The wink Hoseok gave him was most likely a reaction to more shampoo gathering at the corner of his left eye.

Before the heat in Taehyung’s cheeks, threatening to paint his face in the colours of secret, could give him away, he quickly bent down. He was aware Jungkook had already let hot water and a pair of precise hands, massaging the shower gel into his red sweaty skin, clean him. Those were Taehyung’s own hands after all, working the younger’s body up and bringing it back down from the high at the same time in the hot passionate steam. Burning down the adrenaline with desperate touches easily became Taehyung’s favourite type of release. However, he couldn't let Hoseok find out about it.

“Oh really? How could I know that?” he laughed awkwardly, still preferring the flower petals embroidered with golden tread on the pillow case over Hoseok’s eyes. He could feel his hands sweating as he traced the round shapes of the patterns.

“He uhm... he said that?” Hoseok finally wiped away the slimy fluid from his eyes, studying Taehyung’s face. “Weren’t you blushing the same way when he did so though?” 

Taehyung didn’t blame Hoseok for his confused tone, but he wished to punish his own mind for running wild with thoughts of Jungkook. He quickly shook his head, hoping the images of the naked torso, glowing in its whiteness in the dim light behind the shower curtain, would dissolve into thoughts that felt more faded compared to the pink embarrassment.

“No, no,’ Taehyung’s voice cracked slightly, ‘It was just food. You know I can't tolerate the spicy,” a nervous chuckle was back.

Hoseok raised an eyebrow sceptically, clearly not convinced by his weak attempt to excuse the crimson that could rival a ripe tomato.

“If you say so,” he shuddered. He seemed to decide not to press any further. Instead, he reached behind the door and grabbed something, “Well, if you need that shower,’ Hoseok’s voice was coming muffled by the walls and closed door, ‘Go ahead and use Jungkook’s room.” When Hoseok returned, he had a towel in hand, Taehyung noticed how the snowy-white cotton was wet around the edge and it seemed to absorb some of the purple pigment. Hoseok pressed the dry and still fluffy part to his hairline and then slid it down across his face. When his eyes came to light over the fabric again, they were watching him with expectation.

A mirror was fixed on the wall next to the flimsy wardrobe, showing Taehyung’s secrets as the creases of his muscles and the hues on his skin. Taehyung knew he had to leave before Hoseok set his gaze on the same reflecting surface.

Taking a deep breath, Taehyung nodded, whispering a quick bye to the elder, leaning against the doorframe and keeping an eye on his back. He walked towards the entrance, accompanied by the sound of Hoseok's slippers squelching as he made his way back to the bathroom to rinse out the shampoo before his hair lightened too much.

Taehyung couldn't help but feel a mix of anticipation but also guilt at the same time. Guilt clung to him like a suffocating fog, threatening to consume him whole if he didn't stop lying to his friends.

His hand was already on the handle, the sound of creaking door as they opened after a light press, died away in a splash of water hitting the base of the bathtub.

“Taehyung-ah, wait!”

Taehyung froze mid-step, yet his heart refused to stop pounding; his chest began to ache. As he looked behind his shoulder, opening his eyes wide in an effort to see through the bathroom light, he tried his best to keep up the facade.

“Hyung?”

“Can you check if Jungkook has any shaving cream?”

Taehyung's shoulders sagged with relief.

“Of course, hyung.”

დ

Taehyung was aware his memory usually didn’t walk hand in hand with his orientation sense, but to walk into the wrong room was too much even for him. As if the keycard Jungkook had given to him disappeared from his hand and slipped from his mind; and maybe it really dropped to his feet, the moment his eyes adjusted to the halo of lighting surrounding the single bed in the far corner.

Jimin was curling into himself on the top of now messy sheets. Despite the blanket he was pulling up to his chin by the tight grip of his trembling fingers, Taehyung recognised the stiff fabric of jeans he was wearing during dinner peaking where the blanket was too short to cover his ankles and feet. His hair looked to be stuck with a white layer of product that was crusting exactly the way when was worn for too long and the black mascara rolling dried to his cheeks was staining the pillow lacking the white-golden pillowcase. Jimin brought the back of his hand to wipe his swollen eyes when the sound of beeping announcing Taehyung’s entrance startled his peace. He raised his head, showing the marks deepening into the red pliant skin of his face and his lips parted either to mute the hiccup pressing on the muscle of his diaphragm or to voice out his surprise, but instead, his eyes bulged out of their sockets.

“Oh, I am sorry.” Taehyung hands were already high in the air, emphasizing his apology by the pinkness of his palms. He was not that obvious to not understand the quiet sniffing and Jimin’s raw bitten bottom lip meant he was crying. And while he knew Jimin hated drowning in his misery alone, Taehyung thought he was probably the last person Jimin wanted to see right now.

He turned around, feeling how his sock twisted on the bottom of his heel, bowing his head in shame at what their friendship had become, however, a familiar bag that looked to be thrown carelessly by the leg of the desk caused him to freeze. His arms were still pulling the bottom of his pyjama top up, revealing the hem of his underwear above his sweatpants, when he turned back to face Jimin stretching for his phone on the bedside table.

“What are you doing here?” He pulled an eyebrow up, recognising Jungkook’s Bluetooth speakers that he liked to carry around, placed all around the room and an empty camera case hanging from the handle of the wardrobe by the strap and pulling the door open.  

The bottom of Jimin’s phone, crushed in his fist, was pressing against his hip when he stood up, as if he didn’t want to stay any longer. “I should go,” his voice was trembling the same as his knees he was bending to walk past Taehyung.

It was right then and there when Jimin’s left hand, sizing up the device so their bodies wouldn’t have to touch, swished past him that Taehyung had decided. He had never been like his grandma, believing in faith and reading too much into innocent signs, but as Jimin tripped over the bag Taehyung left thrown on the floor of Jungkook’s hotel room before going for dinner, he could no longer see Jimin’s tears dried on the pillow as a coincidence. Taehyung suddenly felt glad Jungkook’s shoulder had the best bones to cry on, even if on another day, jealousy would be felt tensing his muscles.

“Jimin, wait!” Taehyung breathed out sharply, his legs were already spinning him around. Looking at Jimin’s back, he stretched his arms in front of his chest, feeling the thick air around his fingers while he continued to bend them as if the movement could pull Jimin into his arms.

Jimin didn’t turn, but he wasn’t trying to escape anymore either. By the light shifting of the collar of his T-shirt from left to right across his shoulders, Taehyung could guess he was playing with its hem. Bowing his head until a hump above his neck wasn’t showing between strands of his hair, a breath seemed to get caged in his throat. “Yeah?” he couldn’t hide the surprise behind his whisper.

Maybe the room could sense the seriousness of the situation, so it tried to keep its always there buzz to a minimum, or Taehyung wasn’t aware of how attentive he had become.

“I...” he began swiftly, saliva bubbling the future words, only to gulp down. He often felt like he needed a manual on how to navigate through life. How to wake up just moments before his alarm went off so the furious beeping wasn’t present in his ears until late noon. How to find the right balance between the food he ate and the energy he gave away. When to put on a smile, let out a laugh, scream in frustration, or shed some tears. And most importantly, how to ask for forgiveness when the weight of his mistakes became too much for him to bear alone.

“I am sorry, ”as he hung his head in shame with his arms falling helplessly at his sides, Taehyung whispered an apology.

Jimin remained silent, his blue T-shirt highlighting the sharp angles of his shoulder blades. The room felt suffocating, as if the walls were hurtling towards Taehyung at great speed, cutting off any thoughts of escape. He swallowed hard, feeling guilt scratching at his throat.

“You’re sorry?” disbelief was slipping past Jimin’s tongue like venom, poisoning Taehyung’s blood, running through his veins with quickly dissolving naivety. “Taehyung, I thought we say everything to each other. We promised to not keep secrets after what had happened last year. And yet-” Jimin’s eyes were glassy with unshed tears he tried to blink away. He rubbed his forehead with his fingers and shook his head before speaking again, sticking out his tongue between his teeth like he needed to push out all the weight on his soul. Taehyung realised that maybe their friendship wasn't as fragile as it seemed, and that Jimin had been carrying some of the burden himself. "I thought you needed time," Jimin continued, voice strained. "I thought you weren't ready to talk about what happened that night or that hyung had forbidden you from telling anyone. But then I found out Jin hyung knows more about you than I do." Taehyung winced, hearing echoes of broken promises that tortured Jimin every day as he looked at Taehyung's face full of lies. He was too humble to point fingers at Taehyung, but too proud to continue walking down a path they had paved with pillars of the shared opinions.

“Jimin, I...,’ Taehyung took a deep breath, struggling to find the right words, ‘I screwed up, okay? I messed up so badly, and I didn't know how to face you. I was scared, Jimin, scared that if I told you the tru-”

"You think hiding it from me would hurt any less?” Jimin's voice suddenly rose in anger, no longer a hushed frustration but a loud roar of blame. “That finding out from someone else,’ he gestured wildly with one hand behind himself, pointing at no one and everyone at the same time, ‘would somehow be easier to handle? Taehyung, we promised each other.”

“I know,” Taehyung's voice was strained, his emotions threatening to spill over if didn't bite his tongue soon. But he couldn't care less, if the flood had destroyed the mask the fear was offering for free for Jimin to see, he would let himself drown, even without guarantee Jimin would again fight the waves for him. “I know we did, and I can’t explain why I did what I did back then. It was...’ Jin’s words suddenly pushed from his memory, ‘dumb, careless, dangerous. I never meant to hurt you.” Tears welled up in his eyes as he took a shaky step closer, watching his leg trembling indecisively but with desperation to bridge the distance he could feel only growing between them. However, Jimin turned away, burying him under the surface of cold water with wooden planks and splints.

Taehyung took notice of the conflict screwing the muscles of Jimin’s face before his hair hid his eyes. “But you did hurt me, Taehyung. You left me alone, wondering where you were, what happened. You can’t just disappear like that without a word. I was worried sick. And then...” Jimin's hands balled up into tight fists, a clear sign of an attempt to restrain the betrayal washing over him. “Seeing you with Jungkook... it felt like a punch in the gut.”

Taehyung's hand trembled as he reached out, his fingers hovering in the air before finally brushing against Jimin's shoulder. His eyes were hopeless, avoiding the pain in Jimin's gaze. “I am sorry,” he repeated, his voice barely above a whisper, but with each repetition, his words grew in meaning. “With you, with us.” Yet, when he looked back up at Jimin, there was desperation fighting back. “I should've talked to you, explained everything. I was just too scared.”

Jimin’s shoulders tensed under Taehyung’s touch, but he didn't pull away. Jimin finally turned to face him, tears glimmering in his eyes. “Sorry for what?’ he asked, ‘For pushing me away? For not talking to me? Scared of losing me? Because, Taehyung, you're doing a pretty good job of that on your own.”

“I regret it every day,” Taehyung hurried to explain, his own eyes mirroring the pain in Jimin’s.

Silence sat heavily between them. It left a bitter taste in their mouths, the aftermath of an argument. It could be broken only by the sound of Jimin’s heavy sigh, “Taehyung, I need time,’ he said slowly, ‘You think saying sorry will make everything okay? Do you think it erases all those weeks you ignored and lied to me?”

With a final glance at Taehyung, Jimin turned and walked away, leaving Taehyung standing alone in the room lit only by the lamp on Jungkook's nightstand table.

“Fuck.” Taehyung sank to the ground, bringing his knees to his chest, only his arms didn't feel strong enough to hold them in the pose he felt the most miserable in until Jungkook didn't return to his room an hour later, mumbling something about bad camera's quality. Taehyung raised his head, he could barely see the figure leaning towards his curled self through the swollen skin of his puffy eyes pushing into his vision. Jungkook squatted down, combing his fingers through Taehyung's hair.

“Hey,’ Jungkook whispered gently, ‘What happened? Are you okay?” his voice soothing but cautious at the same time, wrapping Taehyung with support and understanding for whatever would come.

With a sniffle, Taehyung's lips wobbled, “I just... I don't want to lose him, Kookie. He’s my best friend,” Taehyung exhaled a shaky breath, the weight of his mistakes still heavy on his shoulders.

დ

Taehyung pushed Jungkook’s hand, tickling his side or belly when he shifted in his sleep, off his body. It joined the crumpled blanket, the only divider between their heats, on the mattress. Sizing the fabric in his fingers, Jungkook’s breathing became more laboured, perhaps he could sense the absence of Taehyung’s skin under his palm even in his sleep. Maybe he could still feel the phantom of his dreams, but Taehyung let himself wonder if Jungkook ever returned to their shared memories behind his closed eyelids.

Looking at the wrinkles pulling his eyebrows together, Taehyung thought Jungkook was going to wake up, but then he cleared his throat and his forehead smoothened again. Turning on his other side, he brought the blanket over his torso.

Taehyung pushed his chin up, boring his head into the pillow squashed against the headboard until he couldn’t feel the protesting strain, he let the unknown sounds of the hotel, sleeping but being awake simultaneously, lure him back to the kingdom of no worries.

Taehyung sometimes became fleshly in the fantasies his mind was making; he was more than a feeless observer sensing everything physical through the memories of his awake self. Just as the handle of tonight’s promises came into contact with his hand, a sound from the outside world made everything disappear.

Hobi hyung, thought Taehyung wearily, listening to the steps creaking where the rug was too short from the next room. He recognised the rhythm of Hoseok's stride, the way his left foot dragged slightly and his right foot landed with a soft thud. It was a sound that Taehyung knew too well, having spent countless hours dancing in the same practice room.

He suddenly remembered Hoseok asked him to look for shaving cream. With a sigh, he threw his legs over the edge of the bed and pushed his upper body up. He faintly remembered the schedule looming over their early morning and knew Hoseok would not stick his head out of their room until his cheek would not be baby-smooth again.

As he pushed open the bathroom door, a faint scent of lavender mingled with the steam from the shower they had taken together, wrapping him in an atmosphere of peacefulness.

The room itself was flawlessly organized, every item was placed carefully just as Jungkook preferred it. Toothbrushes stood upright in a holder on the sink counter, their bristles pristine and untouched. A stack of neatly folded towels lined the shelf next to the shower, each one folded into a crease-less tower. The clothes he had nearly ripped from Jungkook's body earlier were hanging over the ladder radiator next to the socks Taehyung recognised as his.

Taehyung glanced around the bathroom, his eyes landing on a bag sitting next to the sink counter between the plastic tube of soap and a razor. It was a small plain white cosmetic bag. Even if Jungkook was a simple man, Taehyung thought it didn't look like one he would use.

The material felt smooth and sturdy under his fingertips as he hurried to unzip it. Rummaging through a variety of skin products; bottles of toner, moisturizer, and face masks - their labels gleaming under the soft bathroom light, all of sudden, his eyes widened and a crimson red spread across his cheeks. Nestled within the bag were condoms and a bottle of lube.

[vnbifolio]

mama's boy; cover por bea

› capa teste, [11/10/23]

[bleuside97]

There is Only One Rule.

paring: toxichusband!jungkook x wife!reader

genre: yandere jungkook

summary: when y/n get home late and jungkook is waiting for her.

warnings: Jungkook is an asshole in this, abusive behavior, drunk and aggressive Jungkook, manipulative behavior, cussing, manhandling, bipolar jungkook, sadistic Jungkook, mentions of gagging, jealousy, degrading oc, oc is punished by jk.

This is purely fiction just for entertainment purposes. Do not condone or support behavior like this!

Jungkook kisses his teeth, shaking his head. "Ah... What can she be doing out so late." He pressed his lips against the rim of the cold beer in his hand, closing his eyes letting the cold sensation trickle down his his throat. That was the last drop left of his drink. He rest the empty bottle on the coffee table that was in front of the chair. He leans back in the chair, kicking his feet on the coffee table in thought. Resting his tattooed arm above his head and the other arm scratching his chin. The cans and empty bottles of soju pile around the floor. Currently, it's early in the morning he awaits for your arrival, watching the minutes go by on the clock. His eyes turned to the front door as he heard the sound of keys unlocking it. You walked into your dark house, tired out of your mind. You just had the night of your life with a couple of friends and want nothing more to do than be in your loving husband's arms. You turned to lock the front door, taking off your shoes before the door.

His eyes narrowed at the sight of you. "Where the fuck were you?" He demanded, finally standing up from the couch. "Relax, I was just with a couple friends." Your voice is monotone. You pause in your steps, you stretch your arms above your head to yawn. You eyes land on the only other person in the room. You take in his appearance. He moved sloppy and slurred his words a bit. He's drunk. Nevertheless you go to kiss him on the cheek. He backs away slightly, he was clearly pissed off. Pushing you slightly away when you tried to kiss him. He crossed his arms over his chest, glaring at you menacingly.

"You know what time it is? You were supposed to be home hours ago. What is my wife's explanation for coming home at almost the crack of dawn?" He stared down at you waiting for a response.

"What's up your crack?" You muttered under your breath, making sure Jungkook didn't hear you. "I didn't know you were my dad. Next time I'll make sure to ask for permission first." Y/n rolls her eyes and carries her tired legs to the kitchen to get herself a meal out of the fridge. He follows you to the kitchen, standing behind you as you fill up a cup from the fridge. He grabs your arm, spinning you around to face him.

"Don't you fucking dare disrespect me!" He growls, his eyes blazing with fury. He shoves you hard against the fridge, pressing his body against yours. The back of your head immediately hits the cold metal throbbing immediately.

"You will never talk to me like that again." His once dark brown eyes become dark. He looks down at you intensely. His hands remain at the side of your head locking you in. "Jungkook stop!" You whined pushing your husband off her with all your might, he only stumbled a bit before catching himself. He takes a minute to walk straight towards you. He chuckles eerily as his hands worked to unbutton his cuffs and roll the sleeves of his crisp black button up to the elbow, telling you he is not playing around. When your husband is drunk, there's only one rule don't make him mad.

"Yah! Where are your manners is that how a wife should treat her husband, huh?” His voice is so powerful it is laced with hostile, enough to make you feel small. You looked at him to digest the situation not knowing who it can turn out. Maybe you where fucked out of your mind too, not thinking straight. Because you were most definitely brave at this moment. "Jungkook, who do you think you are huh." You answered bravely before you could see something in the Jungkook switch. The look in his eyes was cold and ruthless, as if he was ready to hurt you. And that scared you the most.

You wanted to say that Jungkook had never acted so aggressive before but that would be a lie. "Look at me y/n." He commands you in his busan accent. You look into his dark eyes, you don't see the same doe eyed man you, you knew before. He narrows his eyes at you menacingly, if looks can kill you'd be dead by now. "Sweetheart, I should really fix that mouth of yours... Just how rude are you? One warning was already given to you, now you will get the apprehensions."

Your eyebrows furrowed, giving him a confused look. You hesitate to utter another word. "Honey, are you drunk?" You asked the new man standing in front of you. He ignores your question, nodding his head kidding his bottom lip out. "Do you think I want to be like this? Do you think I like being so aggressive? No! I can't help it, I can't control myself when I'm around you. You make me lose all control. So you should be more careful around me. This is your fault, y/n." Jungkook's tone is cold as ice as if he doesn't feel an inch to blame for his abusive behavior.

He stands beside the counter grabbing your hand pulling you to the sink of the kitchen. He forcefully pushes your head down the sink, hand reaching for the soap. You try your hardest to fight against him. Yelling and thrashing out, but he didn't listen to you. He positions his body behind you his big strong arms wrap around your smaller frame like a lock. "Y/n. You know how much I can't stand when I have to repeat myself.” Through brute force he is able to force your mouth wide open and shoved the bitter liquid. He watches you with a smile as you react by gagging your hand in your mouth. He enjoyed seeing the tears leave your eyes. When Jungkook feels as if you've had enough he with water helps you rinse the cleaning substance out of your mouth. Soon enough all over the soap leaves you a chocking and crying mess on the counter. You try to catch your own breathe. He steps away from you admiring is his work. But soon, enough he feels only a tad guilty.

He grabs your wrists again, squeezing them tight. He pulls them behind your back, pressing your body against his. You could feel his warm breath on your neck, his voice low and menacing. she turns her face away from him as he reeks of beer. He grabs your chin, forcing you to look up at him. His eyes turned a shade lighter.

"Aigoo, I didn't mean to be so rough." he apologizes, seeming genuinely remorseful. He gives you a weak smile, hoping you will understand. He pouts his pink lips to you.

He reaches out and touches your cheek, caressing it gently. His eyes meet yours, filled with such warmth and affection. He looks at you with such devotion, as if you were the most important person in the world to him. He stops nuzzling your neck, his face just inches away from yours.

He gazes at you with such fondness and affection, his eyes filled with now love. You eyes now unsure if you can look at him the same. He seems completely smitten with you, as if all his anger has disappeared. "I'm sorry" he apologizes again, seeming genuinely remorseful. "I got carried away, I let my jealousy and possessiveness get the better of me. You have to understand, I'm afraid of losing you" he explains, "Y/n, let's go to bed now."

a/n edited: let me know if you like this one ... should i keep doing fics like this. I love writing yandere but maybe this is too abusive. But the real question is why am I writing fics like this so casually? and trust me i have many more yandere fics in mind. like idea wise and i basically have the whole brainstorming thing down. but it would really be amazing if I can collab with someone to write them with.

[run2yoongi]

puppy love | jjk + kth x reader. ch.1

you’d met jeon jungkook and his best friend kim taehyung in your first year at university. it didn’t take long for you to fall for jungkook, however it was clear that he was less than interested in romance. you pushed down the frustration and jealousy when jungkook talks about his weekend exploits and dating app matches, telling yourself that being friends with benefits was better than being nothing at all. you didn’t expect that one of the benefits of your arrangement with jungkook was going to be his best friend, taehyung.

↳ pairing: fuckboy!jungkook x reader, taehyung x reader (later chapters)

↳ setting: college au ↳ warnings: explicit rough sexual content, (assumed) alcohol consumption, pet names, teasing, spanking, jk is kind of an asshole, kinda toxic dynamic, internalised misogyny if you squint.

↳ side note: just fyi, i’m basing this off the dorms at my uni which aren’t all shared rooms so that’s why there isn’t rly a roommate in this story hehe. also please like if u enjoy! this is the first work i've posted in a decade so i really wanna know if people like it!!

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jeon jungkook, to his credit, never strung people along. he was direct and clear about his distaste for romance while he was at uni. 'i’d rather just have fun'. you’d heard it from him a hundred times when the girls and boys from your lectures asked if he was single. this was one of the many reasons you kept your disgusting crush on him to yourself, telling him you were both totally on the same page and dating in university is dumb, anyway.

it seemed like a good idea when he suggested being friends with benefits. he would rather be hooking up with someone who ‘felt how he felt’. you had just nodded your head, taken another sip of your drink, and kissed him. that was four months ago now. not much had changed, really. you would still make fun of people over chat in lectures, get drinks with taehyung together, walk back to your dorms. the only difference was that when jungkook dropped you off, he would sneak right behind you into your room, wrap his arms around you and place his lips on your neck. he would whisper the filthiest things into your ear and slide his thigh in between your legs before he led you over to your bed.

that was it really.

in reality, you had begun to question your sanity. taehyung, of course, was the first to notice. he was jungkook’s friend first, but you had grown undeniably close as he was generous enough to be your study mentor. taehyung was two years your senior and had witnessed what you were going through more times than he could count.

“and that girl from tinder, jennie, she said i could bring some friends.” jungkook spoke excitedly about this upcoming house party he’d been invited to by ‘some girl from tinder’. you had to force yourself not to roll your eyes.

‘another one.’ you thought.

“no offence kookie,” taehyung sighed, his eyes darting between you and his closest friend. “but i think i grew out of house parties in my first year here.”

“please tae!” jungkook pleaded with a dramatic pout. “y/n, please say you’ll come at least.” he shifted his soft brown eyes to focus on you. your stomach churned at the sight of his full lips so close to you. he’d made that face to you many, many times before when he’d come over to ‘watch a movie’. he knew how effective it was.

“afraid you’ll have to tell jennie that your only two friends can’t make it.” you replied, poking him in the ribs as he swung on the barstool he was seated at. honestly, you didn’t really have plans. you just couldn’t stomach seeing jungkook sneak off to some upstairs bedroom with another glamorous rich girl while you were stuck with a bunch of strangers that you didn’t have any interest in on some gross couch.

taehyung saw pure frustration flicker over your face for half a second. he always caught it. every time jungkook mentioned that he was sleeping around with anyone who wasn't you.

“you guys are both boring.” jungkook sighed. of course he didn’t mean it, however, it was jungkook so the comment still stung, just a bit. “plus, you’re not my only friends.”

in sync, tae and you looked around at the empty seats at your groups table. “do you see anyone else here, y/n?” taehyung asked with a smirk pulling at his lips.

“sure don’t.” you replied, casting your gaze back to jungkook. he chuckled a bit, looking down at his phone to check the time. “i gotta go to this group project meeting soon,” he muttered. you knew that was a lie. taehyung probably knew it too. “i’ll probably just drop this one off to her room and then go- so i’ll see you tomorrow tae.” he sighed, feigning annoyance as he stood from his chair and placed his palms over each of your shoulders.

you didn’t really know why jungkook hid your arrangement from his best friend. it seemed like they shared everything else with each other. plus, taehyung had surely figured it out by now. there was no reason that jungkook had to walk you back to your dorm room while it was still light out. maybe he was just being polite.

“yeah, have fun.” taehyung dismissed his friend, placing his glass down and grabbing his bag to leave.

yeah, he definitely knew.

–

it had taken all of two seconds for jungkook to shove his way into your dorm room after you’d unlocked the door. “you’re not gonna be late for your group meeting?” you teased, raising an eyebrow at him.

“shut up.” jungkook growled, already tugging at the hem of your top to untuck it from your skirt. “need you now, today was so boring.”

you scoffed at the implication that you were merely entertainment for him. though, you couldn’t help the warmth spreading along your cheeks as you glanced at his tongue slipping over his lip ring as he worked to lift your shirt up.

“was hoping you’d be wearing this for me,” jungkook teased, his hands coming up to cup your breasts that were sitting pretty in a dusty purple lace bra.

“not for you,” you let out an exasperated sigh as jungkook’s thumbs slipped underneath your bra and brushed over your nipples.

“mmhm.” jungkook mused, unconvinced. he moved his hands to slip underneath your thighs, lifting you up swiftly as you locked your legs around his waist. he walked the two of you over to your bed. it was a single, but you knew how to make it work by now.

as your back hit the mattress, jungkook kneeled over you and bit his lip at the sight of your flushed face and exposed skin. he slipped his thigh in between your legs, slowly parting them as his hand grazed your soft skin sending shockwaves straight to your core.

you could feel your heat starting to dampen, craving his touch. “bet you’ve been waiting for this all day.” he teased, gently stroking you over your underwear with his thumb. “you gonna tell me you didn’t get this wet for me either?”

you let out a groan. he always knew which buttons to push to get you worked up in a mixture of frustration and embarrassment. “that’s all you,” you admitted, breaking eye contact as you looked down to his hands on you. he shuffled forward slightly and made quick work of removing your bra and palming your breasts. you felt the cold metallic feel of his lip ring as he brought his mouth to your chest, small kitten licks quickly escalating into sucking and biting.

you couldn’t resist letting out a soft whimper, your hand sliding along the cold wall as he continued sucking and palming your tits. you usually tried to be considerate of your dorm room neighbours by keeping things quiet- but it didn’t always work out, especially not with jungkook.

“such pretty tits.” jungkook groaned in between licks.

“please,” you begged, far too frustrated to indulge jungkook’s obsession with your chest anymore. “what do you want, baby?” he probed as he propped himself up to look over your body again. “your mouth.” you exhaled, still embarrassed after months of this.

without a word, he pushed himself so his face was right in between your plush thighs. he flipped your skirt up quickly and pushed his nose over your underwear, breathing you in. you flinched in response to the contact, his nose was so close to your clit that you almost gasped. you felt the pressure of his tongue over your panties, teasing you. “jungkook, please.” you whined. he smirked up at you and licked his lips. “but i like the sound of you begging.” he answered, fingers dragging themselves over you.

“j-jungkook please. i don’t wanna play games.” you pleaded with him, staring into his eyes earnestly. “i’m not playing games.” he snapped at you as he moved his face away from your heat, much to your chagrin.

“just tell me what you want, baby.”

every time he called you that soft, sweet pet name, you nearly melted.

he lowered himself back between your thighs and used his pointer to hold your underwear to the side. your breath hitched in your throat and you could barely think as he licked a stripe over your folds. “you want it like this?” he asked, fixing his eyes on your desperate expression. “yeah, please, more.” you begged.

he painted another stripe on your folds with his tongue, gently slipping between them and nudging the hood of your clit with his nose. you couldn’t restrain your moan this time. “so sensitive,” he teased. he readjusted his position to spread your legs further, putting your whole pussy on display for him. you tried to ignore the shame growing in your stomach.

he licked you up and down lazily before flicking his tongue over your clit, causing you to let out another strained moan. you could feel his fingers grazing your centre as he licked you and you were desperate for more stimulation. “‘kook,” you whined, bucking your hips towards him.

he pinned you down with his free arm, placing all of his weight on one of your legs and spreading you further. “so impatient, baby.” he sighed as if he was about to lecture you like a stern older brother. you pouted, desperate for more of him. “need you.” you mumbled.

you were grateful jungkook took sympathy on you as he slowly pressed a digit into you as his tongue slowly stimulated your clit. “need you too, baby.” he groaned into you, making your heart flutter and your head dizzy at the overwhelming mix of feelings. you noticed the strain pressing against jungkooks sweatpants. “i’ll turn the favour.” you breathed as you felt the pressure start to build inside you. jungkook curled his finger inside you, causing you to squirm underneath him. after hearing your begs for more, he slipped in another digit.

“gotta get you ready for me, baby.” he taunted as he stretched you on his fingers. you let out a shrill whine as you felt the world around you begin to disappear. “i’m getting close,” you whimpered as he picked up his pace while maintaining the short licks on your clit. your vision began to blur as your eyes started to water at the sensation. you could hardly make out what jungkook was saying with his mouth against your pussy. “such a good girl. cum on my tongue, baby, come on.” he coaxed you.

your orgasm erupted instantly at his words. you could only see flashes of white as you clamped your eyes shut, overwhelmed by the feeling of your walls pulsating around jungkook’s fingers. you hadn’t even noticed how loud you were being.

before you could even come back down to earth, jungkook crawled back on top of you and brought your lips together. he’d told you early on that knowing you could taste yourself on him always got him riled up. you moaned into his lips, still reeling from your orgasm. you froze when you felt him slide his sweatpants down and toss them onto the carpet. for a moment, he was sitting upright, allowing you to notice the tone of his arms,

his torso,

his thighs.

you felt a hot blush crawl onto your face at the sight, but if jungkook noticed, he didn’t say anything. ‘god.’ you sighed to yourself. it dawned on you, it was going to be impossible to get over your stupid crush like this. fortunately, that wasn’t your main concern at that moment. “feel good?” jungkook asked as he pulled you up into his arms. you nodded languidly, the post-orgasm mindlessness beginning to settle over you.

“be a good girl for me.” he whispered into your ear. your heart was going to beat out of your chest, and you were sure jungkook could feel it. you didn’t even need to look at him to see the smirk that plagued his glossy lips. he stretched his legs out over your duvet and leaned back against the wall, keeping his hands firmly planted on each of your hips. your faces were so close that you couldn’t resist kissing him again. he bit your lip as your weight shifted over his cock, and you felt his fingernails dig into your flesh.

he guided your hips back and forth as you withdrew your lips from his, finding them pressed to his neck. you licked, bit and sucked at his neck, drawing a moan from him as his cock twitched underneath you. “you’re gonna leave a hickey.” he breathed, his head thrown back asking for more. “i know.” you replied between kisses to the nape of his neck. you hoped he didn’t think too deeply into that. he usually didn’t, anyway.

slap!

you felt the sting on your ass before you even realised what was happening. “you think you’re clever, teasing me like this.” jungkook hissed as you looked into his dilated pupils. “you want to mark up my neck so everyone knows how well you take my cock.”

slap!

he smacked your ass again, unrelenting. you let out a pained whine in response which jungkook spanked you for, again.

slap!

“please!” you cried out in a mix of pain and pleasure. the throbbing of your ass brought you back down from the orgasmic high that you hadn’t realised you’d been floating on.

“look who found her manners,” he taunted with a playful smile resting on his face. “you think if you ask nicely enough, i’ll give you my dick?”

“please, jungkook.” you sobbed, not realising how badly you wanted to be filled. he continued to stare at you expectantly while he poked and grabbed at the stinging flesh on your ass. “i want your cock, i want you to fill me.”

that seemed to please him, as he hoisted you up for a moment to pull out his cock from underneath you. “go slow,” he whispered as if he was reluctant to show you kindness in this situation. “don’t strain yourself.” he reached over to your nightstand and reached into the top draw to grab a condom. as if this was his own room.

you nodded, suppressing the butterflies in your stomach as he wet his cock with his spit before he rolled the condom on. he swiped the tip along your entrance as you held yourself over him, hesitant. “don’t get all shy on me now, darling.”

you really couldn’t take much more of these pet names.

you nodded and slowly lowered yourself onto his throbbing tip, questioning if two fingers was really enough to prepare you for jungkook’s heavy cock. you rocked yourself on his tip, pulling your hips in small circles as you adjusted to the feeling. he let out a low moan and shut his eyes. his head fell back onto the wall as you sunk down further, the stretch and overstimulation stinging slightly. you couldn’t hold back another moan either as you clutched onto his shoulders.

for a moment, you held yourself from sinking any further as the sensation overtook you. you knew you weren’t going to last long before another orgasm hit you, so you needed to ground yourself. breathe. you heard jungkook whimper quietly in frustration, you looked up to see his eyes pleading with you. look who’s desperate now.

“i’m sorry,” he hummed before grabbing onto your thighs and sliding himself up into you, greedily filling you with his cock. a satisfied moan fell from his lips as you closed your eyes as tightly as possible. barely giving you any time to adjust, he repeated the motion, panting with every thrust. you gripped onto one of his thighs, feeling the definition and muscle stretch as he fucked you. “couldn’t wait any longer, you drive me insane.” he sputtered.

his eyes fixed on your chest as you bounced on his lap while he rammed into you. his tongue played with his silver lip ring, and a strand of hair fell onto his damp forehead. you had always thought he looked his best like this.

“touch yourself, baby. don’t you wanna cum all over me again?” he teased, tightening his grip around your thighs. you brought your hand to your core and placed it flat against your pussy so you could feel his cock as it thrust into you before sliding it up to your clit again. you released a soft moan at the pressure of his cock inside you mixed with the overwhelming sensation of touching your sensitive clit.

he worked himself into you, becoming rougher and greedier as the minutes passed. he nipped at your throat, licking you from your shoulders to your jaw. you quickly felt another wave approaching as he brought his hand to meet yours on your clit. the added pressure brought you to the edge, and your legs began shaking over him. your moan ripped through the room, bringing jungkook closer to his own end.

he laid you down as you continued to shake underneath him and fucked you through your second orgasm. he roughly grabbed at your hips to fuck you onto his cock as hard as he could. you moaned incoherently, head lulling to the side as you lacked the energy to hold it up. discontent, he grabbed your jaw and stared into your eyes, pupils almost completely blown out with pleasure. the fucked out expression you held was enough to finally tip him over the edge. his head flew back for a final time as his hips stuttered and lost their rhythm. you felt his cock pulse inside you as his cum leaked into the condom. he slowed down his pace and glanced back at you, his cock still twitching.

“fuck, baby.” he said, “i’ll never get tired of that.”

unfortunately, you probably wouldn’t either.

[bangtaninborderland]

THE GENTLEMEN SPECIAL SCENE - Ch.02

Genre: Smut, filthy filthy smut.

Warning: oral (m rec), degradation, mentions of pet play, humiliation, anal, mxm, use of cock ring, denial. Overstimulation. This is literally filth.

Plot: Jimin punishes Taehyung and Jungkook after they take something that doesn’t belong to them.

Vote for this weeks gentlemen

When Jimin entered the room both Taehyung and Jungkook had been on their knees, a smirk plastered on both of their faces.

“Don’t you two boys look pretty, how lucky I am that I have you all to myself.” Neither of them responded, the silence showing both a sign of acceptance and submission, one that jimin revelled in.

He paid them no mind as he gathered the box of “tools” he would need. He felt the younger boys eyes on him as he laid everything out on the table beside his bed. Various toys and a bottle of lube filling up the space.

“Both of you, naked.” He instructed, sitting on the bed, positioning himself to get a better view as they shuffle awkwardly around each other in silence, their clothing being discarded and then folded up before both resumed their positions in front of the Dom.

“So well behaved, it’s a shame you couldn’t have done that sooner isn’t it?”

Jungkook was the one brave enough to brake the silence. “We are sorry.” He couldn’t help stealing a glance at his elder.

“Oh bun you really think that’s going to make it all better?” The doms eyebrow quirks up as he stares back at the younger . “And did I say you could look at me? If you want to cum today I suggest you start to behave”

It was adorable how Jungkook flailed to look down, his cheeks reddening at the mild scolding.

His attention turns to Tae who had began writhing around slowly almost as if to avoid suspicion but it wasn’t something Jimin let go unnoticed. He reached a hand out grabbing the youngest face firmly, forcing him to still his small movements. “Baby do you want to explain to me why you thought it was a good idea to take the very collar I had explicitly told you to leave alone?”

The younger froze muttering out a simple “ I don’t know“ his brain providing no excuse or reason.

Jimin clicks his tongue agains the roof of his mouth breathing out a laugh before grabbing Jungkook by his hair, pulling him forward into his lap. “Well then you can sit here whilst I play with your little accomplice and when you are ready to give me a good enough answer then maybe I’ll let you join in.”

“Bun look at me.” Jimin instructed, “take my cock out and show me that you aren’t just a disobedient bunny.”

Jungkook didn’t hesitate, his hands rushing to free Jimins semi hard cock. His mouth wrapped around the tip, causing the Dom to groan.

Taehyung whined in response which earned him a silencing glare from Jimin. “And don’t even think about getting off, if you so much as touch your dick I will tie you up and leave you with a vibrator on your tip until you’ve cum so many times all you can do is whine and moan for me to stop.”

At that the pups movements froze, his hands falling to his side as he watched on as Jungkook continued to take Jimins member in his mouth.

He brushed the maknaes hair from his face as he stuttered out words of praise. “Fuck such a good boy for me, do you like having my cock in your mouth?” He pushed his hips upwards against the boys face causing him to gag a little before settling back down into a simple rhythm, to which Jimins hips met, helping the younger take the full length of the doms cock. “Just like that baby.”

Jungkook had a special skill when it came to sucking cock, he knew just how to flick his tongue around Jimins tip causing the Dom to tighten his grip in his hair. Jungkook thrived off the way Jimin would use his mouth in moments like these, he would never openly admit it but being used like a slut made his own cock throb, it didn’t help that he could hear the quiet whimpers of Tae who had been watching the scene eagerly whilst simultaneously trying to follow Jimins orders of keeping his hands anywhere but to himself.

Jungkooks doe eyes had glazed over, his own orgasm approaching despite being untouched, he let out a desperate whine as Jimin pulled his cock away but was silenced when he felt a light slap to his cheek. “I am going to cum, do not swallow I want you to keep it in your mouth.”

The maknae nodded, he didn’t care where Jimin came as long as it was somewhere in him. He only had to work the tip for a few more seconds before he felt the ropes of warm salty liquid coat his mouth, he did his best to keep it resting against his tongue as Jimin pulled out.

Despite still recovering from his orgasm Jimin sat up, reaching a hand out to the neglected man. “Taehyung, baby come here.”

Taehyung didn’t hesitate, jumping to his feet only to be scolded. “Did I tell you that you could walk? Such a dumb boy.”

“I’m sorry.” He whispered before dropping to his knees, this time crawling over to where Jungkook had been sitting between Jimins leg.

He instantly felt comforted as Jimin ran a hand through his curls. “It’s okay baby, I want you to go ahead and kiss jungkookie for me okay?.”

“Okay.” Taehyung chirped, a dopey grin plastered on his face as he leant across to the younger.

Jimin was mesmerised by the site of them, his cum being transferred into Taehyungs mouth as Jungkook flicked his tongue against the mole on his lip. Between the two Taehyung seemed to take the dominant stance on the kiss, his own hands coming to wrap around Jungkooks neck which in turn only made him moan into the matters mouth.

The Dom would have happily watched them go on if he didn’t have other plans but unfortunately for them he did.

He stood up, wrapping his hand around the scruff of Taes neck and pulling him back. Effectively ending their moment of passion. “That’s enough, Jungkook get on the bed face down ass up. Taehyung you’re going to fuck him.”

The masseuse should have known that even when he was being given something that resembled a reward during a punishment he should be ten times more sceptical but he never was. He always accepted whatever Jimin handed to him without question which is why he wasn’t expecting it when the Dom slid a cock ring down his own painfully hard cock.

Jimin laughed at Taehyungs dumbfounded expression. “You can have that off once you make the bunny cum three time.” He winked at him once more before positioning himself in a chair he had placed in the corner.

“Three?!” Jungkook look just as shocked at his revelation.

“Do you want it to be four? Or I could put the cock ring on you and have Taehyung overstimulate your pathetic little cock for hours. Your choice.”

Jungkook instantly shook his head in a panic. “No I’ll take the three I’m sorry.”

“You’re sorry, what?” Jimin leaned forward, his face blank.

Jungkooks face flashed a crimson red as he looked away and mumbled a small “I’m sorry Daddy.”

“Taehyung prep him baby, your cock is too big to fit in his tight ass.” Jimin pointed to the bottle of lube he had placed on the table earlier.

“Yes daddy.” Even if he couldn’t cum straight away, the thought of being inside Jungkook was more than enough to get him moving.

He coated his fingers in a generous amount of the strawberry Lubricant and began working them against the youngest entrance, he marvelled at the way Jungkook let out a muffled moan as he slid a digit into his ass.

“More.” Jungkook pushed back against taehyung earning a slap to his ass.

“Is that how you ask?”

Jungkook groans and Taehyung was pretty sure he had rolled his eyes but he let it slide. “More please.”

“As you wish baby.” Taehyung didn’t wait any longer pushing a second and then third finger into the man beneath him.

It was safe to say Jungkook was enjoying himself, letting out soft moans as he dusted the sheets every time Taehyung graded his finger again his prostate. He gave up being patient after a few minuets. “I don’t know any more prep just please put your cock in me.”

“So fucking greedy.” Taehyung grunted slapping his ass once again before positioning his own angry tip against Jungkooks ass.

“You’re such a desperate slut aren’t you?”He wasn’t even embarrassed as he moaned at the way Jimins words were laced with humiliating filth. The Dom knew exactly what he was doing as Jungkooks cock twitched.

“Make him cum baby.” Jimin winked at taehyung as he rubbed his own hardening member, watching carefully as the masseuses cock disappeared inside the younger.

“oh Tae- fuck- harder.” Jungkook babbled incoherently as Taehyung relentlessly abused his ass with his cock, fucking into him like he was nothing more than a fleshlight, a mere toy for his own pleasure. His gaze was focused on Jimin who was now rubbing a hand up and down his length teasingly.

Jungkook interrupts eye fucking as he squeals, his back arching as his orgasm tethers by a string. “Hyung.. wanna cum.”

“Cum for me pretty bunny, make Hyung proud.” Jimins voice was soft but laced with a filth that pushed Jungkook over the edge, taehyung could only squeeze the youngest thighs harshly as he held himself back from his own impeding release, the way Jungkooks ass tightened around him as spurts of cum painted his stomach making it almost impossible.

Jungkook was in a daze, his mind clearly elsewhere as jimin approached him. Sitting beside his head as he caressed the boys neck. “Such a pretty whore for me.” He gave taehyung a look before nodding . “Again.”

Taehyung rutted against Jungkook, eliciting a whine from him as he tried to push himself away. Cock throbbing from overstimulation.

Jimin tutted, his hands pressing down the poor boy down into his previous position, making it impossible for him to get away as taehyung began fucking into him again, Jungkooks cock twitching with every plunge of taehyungs cock against his prostate.

It was both heaven and hell, tears already rolling down his face. “Puh - please. Too ‘uch”

“You wanted to help my dumb puppy, you take the consequences baby. If you move again I’m going to make your ass all colours of red with my belt.”

Tae groaned, a shiver running down his spine at the thought of watching Jimin punish his partner in crime.

“Such a fucking slut, do you like the idea of that? Do you like the idea of watching me punish him? Does it make my puppy excited, maybe we should tie him up and see hot many hits it takes to turn his ass a pretty purple?”

Jungkook couldn’t hold back at the filthy words falling from Jimins mouth, accompanied by the jackhammering of taehyungs thick lengthy cock inside of him, another orgasm ripping through him, milking his cock dry as he whimpered and whined pathetically.

“no-no more, no no can’t can’t agains, too much.” Jungkook sobbed shaking his head, it was honestly a futile attempt but he was too fucked out to care. Every nerve within his body was on fire and Jimin loved it, pride swelling in his chest and he watched them both.

“What’s your colour baby? Do you need to stop?”

Jungkook shook his head no but that wasn’t enough to satisfy jimin. Comfort and safety was always before pleasure. “Verbally kook.”

“Green, good, go”

Taehyung was focused, his face twisted in both pain and pleasure as he fought to hold his own orgasm back, Jungkook was a babbling writhing mess beneath him, too tucked out to even beg properly.

Both at his mercy, both at his disposal.

“Baby, pull out.” Jimin instructed, his head snapping up to meet the dominants eyes instantly, as he slowed his sloppy thrusts.

The sight before jimin was beautiful, Jungkooks thighs painted with taehyungs cum, who was wincing as the shorter man pulled off the cock ring.

Jimin squeezed taehyungs balls, hard enough to make him hiss in pain. Although it was something he rather enjoyed. “Keep fucking him for me, show me that you know how to use that big cock of yours, prove to me it’s not just worthless. You wouldn’t want to have a worthless cock would you? Wouldn’t want me to have to lock it away in a nice little cage to keep you safe hmm? What do you think jungkookie, do you think taehyung fucked you right? Should we make him do it again? Think your pretty hole could handle another round?”

“Y-yes daddy wan’ taetae to make m-me feel good again.” Jungkook pouted, pulling them both towards him with the limited reach he had.

Taehyung flipped Jungkook over, despite his bigger frame it was easy considering how pliant the younger was. He lined himself up and slid once more between Jungkooks ass, forcing his thick member into the sloppy hole with a grunt, taes right hand landing a slap to his ass cheek as he watched his cock disappear.

“Such good boys for me, fuck him for me puppy, cum for me like good boys.”

On Jimins command taehyung began thrusting into the younger, hips snapping eagerly, it was no longer about pleasing Jungkook or meeting the requirements of Jimin it was about seeking his own pleasure, it was about emptying his heavy balls into the pretty ass before him.

“Look at you learning puppy, learning how to use your useless cock all to please me. Maybe I’ll get jungkookie a pretty collar so you can keep him tied up, use him whenever, practice with him for me hmm? But then again I know how desperate you are. After all, my big dumb puppy can’t control himself. Needs his owner to take care of him.” Jimins voice was dark, daring, fucking down right illegal.

The words had taehyungs restraint falling apart, his head lolled back as he came, his moans were deep, rough, as if he was a depraved man finally getting what he needed to sustain him. Jungkook was a mess, panting for oxygen as he all but screamed as he came again, his body going lax as Tae rode out his own.

Jimin talked him through his orgasm, whispering praises into his ear as he planted soft kisses against his skin. “Such a good boy for me taehyungie, it’s okay , I know you can’t help it with that big dumb cock of yours .”

After a few silent moments of everyone recovering from the intense scene, heavy breathing the only sounds, Jimin pulled them both towards him, smothering them in hugs and kisses. “You both did amazing, how do you feel? Sore? Tired? Is there anything you need my sweet boys?”

Jungkook smiled lazily, nuzzling into taes neck. “‘m fucked good.”

“Sorry minie.” Taehyung whined, clearly entering sub space.

Jimin shushed him with a kiss “You have nothing to apologise for, I am so proud of both of you. Although tae I will have to punish you separately for going against me. Do you want to explain to me why you decided to take your collar?”

Tae shrugged as best he could, his body still exhausted. “Wanted to feel closer to you.”

“I’m always in the house pup.”

“wanted more.”

He sighed turning his head to the other body beside him. “And what about you bun? What made you help him?” He asked with a soft kiss to the maknaes sweaty forehead.

“My Tae Tae.”

It was enough of an answer to help jimin understand, he had a feeling that this wouldn’t be the first nor the last time the two got into trouble. It left him feeling somewhat excited, he wouldn’t mind dishing out punishments especially if it meant seeing them like this, all for him, only for him.

“Well, your Tae Tae is forbidden from cumming for the rest of the week and depending on his behaviour possibly the rest of next week. Maybe then he would think twice before requesting you join him for some rule breaking fun hmm?” Jimin laughed as Taehyung groaned, pushing him away before bringing him back seeking comfort.

There was nothing better than the blissful feeling of being fucked, or in Jimins case, watching the people you love be fucked.

[acopenhagenarmy]

ALLIES - CHAPTER FOUR

Pairing: BTS x reader but mostly hyung-line x reader  Side pairings: Jimin x Taehyung, Jimin x Ateez!Wooyoung, reader x Ateez!Seonghwa

Mafia!au - gang!au - assassins!au 

Word count: 3,5k ish

Warnings: Mentions of death, nudity and sex apart from that some strong language. And I think that’s it for now.. 

Summary: Growing up in one of the biggest and most feared mafias has it’s perks, but what happens when you and you’re friends are suddenly shipped off to the other end of the world? Will you stay together or will the world you live in tear you all apart? 

NOTE: THIS IS THE UPDATED VERSION OF MY HEART RUNS TO YOU

-> NEXT CHAPTER

You sat quietly in a chair next to Taehyung waiting for when the headmaster had finished his current conversation. Camilla was currently in his office, Shawn had been in there just before her. Dominic’s assistant was smart enough to not place the four of you in the same room. The day had been dramatic enough as there was no need to add fuel to the fire. 

“I like your katana. It’s one hell of a weapon” Taehyung stated after you’ve been sitting in silence for a while. 

“Oh!” You said and looked down at the blade in its holster that you were holding in your hand. “Thank you” 

He smiled and looked around. Seemingly not sure what to do or what to say to you, after all you just met, and the two of you didn’t have the same pull towards each other as you had with his older brothers, or he had with Jimin. 

“How did you get two guns? I thought we were only allowed to bring one weapon each?” 

You turned your upper body towards him, to encourage conversation. 

“Oh yeah we were. I’m just really not a one weapon type of guy” he said as he shrugged. 

You laughed. 

“Did you break the rules TaeTae?” 

He sent a boxy smile your way as his eyes disappeared. He seemed pleased with your nickname. 

“I would never, I just bent them a little” He stuck a finger in his mouth and started to nibble on the dry skin around his nails. 

“How is that bending the rules?” You asked as you took his hand and removed it from his mouth. You couldn’t stand the sound. 

“Well the rules stated that we were only allowed to bring one weapon each. But nowhere in the rules did it say that I wasn’t allowed to steal the weapons of others” 

His eyes sparkled as he spoke. 

You couldn’t contain the laughter that escaped you. It was loud, genuine and contagious. It didn’t take long before Taehyung laughed with you, and soon the two of you were gasping for air. 

Suddenly the doors in front of you slammed open, and Camilla quickly rushed through without as much as looking at the two of you. 

Dominic called your name. Taehyung took your hand and gave it a gentle squeeze. “I’ll find you after” he said. 

“Thank you TaeTae” 

Dominic was leaning against his desk, quickly walking towards you as you had closed the doors. 

“It’s been a long time coming Y/N” he said as he pulled you in for a hug. 

“It’s good seeing you uncle” 

“Good seeing you kiddo” He gave you an extra squeeze before letting you go and gesturing towards one of the chairs and quickly sat down himself. 

“So… why am I here?” 

He sighed. “How can I not call you in Y/N, it’s been the most dramatic first day off class I’ve had in all my years as headmaster” 

You remained quiet. 

“I’m proud of you, you know?” You tilted your head not quite getting where he was going with his statement. “And your father would be too. The way you’ve handled yourself these last couple of hours is very admirable, and I think you need to prepare yourself for the next couple of weeks because of it” 

“Thank you, it means a lot.” You sent a smile his way. 

Dominic had always been kind, always expecting the best of his sons but he’d never been cruel in the way men tended to be in this line of work. He reminded you a lot of your own father, and it was in cases like this you realized exactly why the two of them were so close. 

“Now!” He said as he clapped his hands together. “Send Taehyung in, I need to expel that kid” 

You started laughing once again. “You can’t uncle” 

He rolled his eyes at you. “Of course I can Y/N, he broke my rules, I can do whatever I want when the kids do that” 

“But he didn’t, he just utilized your wording” 

“How?” He asked as he crossed his arms. 

“He didn’t bring two weapons, he stole one of the guns from some other guy who’s now roaming the halls without any way to defend himself” 

Dominic shook his head as he sighed. 

“Send him in anyways” 

You left the office and told Taehyung he could find you and the guys in one of the public living rooms not far from either of your rooms. 

Despite the building being large, it didn’t take you long to reach your members who were currently napping on the couches. You dropped down between Hoseok and Jimin, and Hoseok quickly pulled you close as he nuzzled his face in the crook of your neck. 

“You smell nice,” he stated. 

You hummed as a response. 

It was quiet, none of you really spoke. You just enjoyed being with each other in solitude for a little while. 

Meanwhile Taehyung had finished his meeting with the headmaster and was updating his brothers and Yoongi on the long discussions he had with the headmaster Dominic. 

“But I guess she must’ve said something to him, cause he just demanded that I return the weapon to the person I stole it from” 

“And that was it? No yelling? No explanation needed?" Yoongi asked. 

Yoongi pondered a little on just why you would explain Taehyung's situation to the man you called uncle. You and Namjoon had come to an agreement earlier that day, a pre-alliance so to speak, but didn’t it take more than that for you to trust them? 

“Well you did kind of defend Blade even though it was mainly because your ego can't handle being called a weirdo” Seokjin said as he ruffled his younger brother's blue locks. 

That’s true… Yoongi thought to himself. 

He pushed open the doors and caught a quick glimpse of you in Hoseok's arms as he entered. He made a mental note of it, reminding himself that he had to ask Hoseok about your relationship when he had him alone. 

Yoongi was quiet, more quiet than most. He was observant and caught the unspoken words between people, and he knew his members like he knew himself. But despite that, even a blind man would be able to see how you affected his leader. And he needed to look out for them all if Namjoon had decided to be blinded by your bloodlust and beauty. 

You quickly removed yourself from Hoseok as you heard the men enter the room. And just as your eyes found Namjoons in an instant, knocking down all walls he had spent his life building. 

“That was quick” You stated as you looked towards the blue haired man. 

Taehyung shrugged. “I think you pretty much saved my ass” 

Jimin laughed with him, making his boxy smile even bigger than before. 

The four boys sat down on the empty couch on the other side of the coffee table. Quickly getting comfortable. It only took Taehyung a few seconds to get comfortable, both arms and legs swinging around Namjoon. He himself seemed unbothered by it. He must be used to it 

“So…” Seokjin said. “This day have been way more exciting than i first expected” 

You all laughed, and his eyes seemed to soften at that. 

“This is new for all of us. New allies happen rarely, and personally the four of us are only really used to working together” You said as you looked at the men who surrounded you. 

“Us too…” Yoongi responded. “But does this mean we’re allies then?” 

“If you still want us, yes. It will take us time. We all have  to get used to this, especially since we’ll see eachother everyday. But let’s use it to our advantage. All have different talents, we all have areas where we can improve, so I would like for us to learn from one another in the classes. It’s only a few of them where we’re all rookies” 

“Sounds like a plan,” Seokjin said. 

“Great! I was thinking that Kook could start out with learning TaeTae a thing or two with hand to hand combat” 

The two men looked at each other and did what you could only assume was a secret handshake that they’d made in the last few hours. 

“Hobi, I would like it if you and Yoongi would sit down with each other. You both work quite far from the field, you like to see everything from the outside” 

They both nodded. 

Namjoon was amazed at just how quickly you’d be able to pair his and yours members with each other. How quickly you had analyzed them all and seen their weaknesses, but at the same time their strengths. 

“Chim, you’ll work with Namjoon. You can teach him a thing or two about how I fight. Something tells me his way is a little more stiff” 

You smiled, and even though you had just criticized him, he couldn’t help but return it. 

“Why don’t you teach me yourself, Park? Afraid?” He asked you 

You laughed. “No, but everything I’ve learned is from Chim or Kook, and I don’t think you’re ready for him yet. Besides, Jimin moves differently than most when he fights. It’s more of a dance, so it’ll give you an edge most people don’t have”

“Does that then mean you’ll be with me?” Seokjin asked, teasingly. 

Jimin and Yoongi quickly looked around the men who quickly stiffened. Hoseok looked like he had stopped breathing, and Jungkook looked like he wanted to bore his knives in his hands, just to make sure that they didn’t touch you. Namjoon however didn’t even blink, he was either used to Jin’s flirting behavior, or he was unbothered by the way he spoke to you. You didn’t really know which of them you wanted it to be. 

"Exactly, I wanna see what you can do Seokjin” You said. Fully aware of just how he could interpret your words. 

“I’ll show you everything… But please, call me Jin” 

“Jin…” It was af you had to taste his name in your mouth, and he seemed pleased, and sent a nod of approval your way. 

The look he had in his eyes felt like he set fire to your blood. 

You quickly coughed, hoping that it would make the feeling disappear. 

“Great! We have a plan then” 

“Does that mean you’ll tell us your name?” Taehyung asked 

“Not quite yet” 

Taehyung pouted at your response which made Jimin break out in the sweetest of smiles. 

“Let’s go Tae, might be an idea to rest up before dinner” Yoongi said and pushed the younger man, earning him a small and dramatic scream. 

“I don’t need rest! I just need to steal a new gun or two” 

“TAE!” You, Namjoon, Seokjin and Jimin all yelled. 

He held his hands up as if he was a thief on the wrong end at a policeman's gun. “Okay, okay I won't then!” 

You all stood up and slowly went back to your individual rooms. 

The rest of the day went by quickly, there was no added drama or chaos. And neither of you needed more to happen. 

You had just put on one of Hoseok’s oversized t-shirts after a well earned shower when you heard a knock on your door. 

You slowly opened it, to scout if it was a friend or foe who stood on the other side. Katana drawn, hidden by the door. 

“Jin” You said when your eyes found his. 

He sent a crooked smile your way. 

“What are you doing here?” You asked as you opened the door wider, as to invite him in while you put away your katana. But he never moved, he remained on the other side of the door, watching you silently as you moved around. 

“I have something for you,” He said and leaned against the doorframe. 

Confusion painted your expression. 

“See it as a token of my appreciation” 

He handed you a little vial filled with what looked like water, but you knew better when it came to the Seokjin. 

“What is this?” You asked as you expected it. 

“It’s just a little something I threw together while you and Tae talked to the headmaster. It slows down the effect of all known poisons we’ll be able to make with the plants and chemicals here. It will paint your lips red as blood if it reacts with anything that could cause you harm. I’ll then be able to whip up an antidote before it takes you out” 

You looked at him with big eyes. “Oh wow… Thank you, so much. that’s an amazing gift” 

“Your very welcome Blade” He was just about to turn around when your voice once again caught his attention. 

"Jin? Can I ask you why you’re giving me this?” 

He smiled, bigger, brighter and way less seductive than he had done so far. 

“I’m not blind you know?” 

“I didn’t say you were?” You answered with a teasing tone. 

He laughed. “I know… We’ve been here for a short amount of time, and I’ve seen how you and Namjoon look at each other. It’s something different from the desire you radiate when you look at me.” 

“I-” 

“Don’t worry Blade, I won't tell anyone about all your crushes. Just like those who crush on you won't confess either. But if I’m gonna steal your heart from my brother, from Jungkook and from Hoseok, I need you to be alive. Therefore the antidote.” 

You couldn’t help the chuckle nor the smile. “Who says I’m even interested?” 

The tone was teasing, almost daring. 

“I do. You know I’m so much more than a pretty face Park, let me show you” 

Jin slowly walked away, a big smile displayed on his lips. He looked happy, a different happiness than what he had displayed all day. This happiness wasn't flirting, it seemed more genuine. 

Damn you Jin. Now I wanna get to know you … 

You quickly closed your door behind him in a desperate attempt to shut his words out, force them back into his throat before they could manifest in you. 

A knock on the door that connected you and Hoseok's shared bathroom pulled you from your thoughts. 

“Come in Hobi” You answered. 

He stood in the door opening for a second. Somewhat afraid of the expression that painted your features. 

“Who was at the door?” 

“Oh, it was just Jin” 

“Was he a bearer of good news?” 

You sent him a puzzled look. 

He pointed to you; “You’re smiling like a maniac” 

“He gave me this” You said and threw the small flask his way. “He’s afraid that I might be poisoned. By either Shawn or Camilla I assume, so he gave me something to detect it and slow it down in case it happens” 

Hoseok expected the flask. “You sure this isn’t poison? That this a scheme to get you to take it?” 

You laughed. Killing me after confessing? You had heard worse theories. 

You were fascinated by Namjoon, in many ways he was like you. A dynasty resting on his shoulders, surrounded by those he trusted the most. He was beautiful, charming, and alluring. But you also knew that as much as you wanted to trace his dragon tattoo with your own hands, as much as you wanted to figure out where it both started and ended, it would mean trouble for the both of you. 

Jin however, offered a whole other life. He was the oldest, and therefore would be easily accepted if you decided to get closer to him. He was tall, deadly and beautiful with his plump lips and wide shoulders. The two of you together would be a lethal combination. 

But you didn’t come here to fall in love, to find your match. This, he, them, were never a part of the plan. So instead of dwelling on Jin’s words, you started to shut off, close off your heart, harden yourself, building up those walls that had been broken down by the Kim brothers in a matter of hours. 

“Lost in thought?” Hoseok asked with a small smile on his lips. He looked cute like this, soft even. 

“A little, it’s been a long day” You stated as you threw yourself on the bed. 

“You don’t say” he said as he laid beside you, pulling your body close to him. 

Hoseok loved having you like this, he knew he was the only one who got to see you like this, at least now. It had been a while since you had a love. For a while he thought that you and your ex might end up married in the future, that was of course until he decided that a life on the seven seas with his 7 best friends seemed better. 

That anyone could choose anyone, anything over you was something Hoseok would never be able to understand. So instead he pulled you even closer to him and entangled his limbs with yours. 

“Where have you been?” Namjoon asked his brother as he walked through the door that led to his room. 

“I stopped by Blades, had something for her” He stated as he sat down in one of the chairs that stood in front of Namjoons desk. 

He lifted his eyebrow. “Oh yeah?” He asked, smirk on full display. 

Seokjin rolled his eyes. “I gave her a flask of the same stuff I’ve been feeding to you for the last few years. Didn’t think you’d want your first ally to drop dead when one of these idiots figure out just what they can make from the herbs that’s on the roof” 

Namjoon nodded. He wasn’t wrong, especially since your father most likely would blame Jin for the poison which would lead to a full on war. 

“Have you talked to Hongjoong yet?” Yoongi asked as he joined the brothers' conversation.  

“No haven’t heard from him, or even seen him yet” 

“I could’ve sworn he said they’d been accepted” He said almost indifferently. 

“Yeah I thought so too, but who knows? They might’ve gotten a better offer” Seokjin said. “Have any of you seen Tae by the way?” 

“I think he’s hanging out with Jimin and Jungkook,” Namjoon stated. 

Yoongi laughed almost silently. “It might be good for him to have someone around his own age to run around with”

Namjoon threw a pillow his way. “I’m only one year older than him, you know” He stated. 

“Oh we know, but you do have a tendency to be a little tense from time to time” Yoongi said as he walked out the room. 

“You got your alliance with the Parks, I’m proud of you brother” Seokjin shot his leader a smile which made him return it shyly. 

“Couldn't have done it without any of you guys, if I’m completely honest I think Tae had more to do with it than the rest of us” 

“Sure he might play a part, but it did sound like she had thought about it as well, so give her some credit” 

"Honestly?" She deserves all the credit” He sighed and whispered: “she deserves everything” 

Seokjin laughed. “Does she now?” 

“What?” Namjoon said with big eyes as he tried his best to not admit that the words had somehow escaped him by accident. 

The older man shook his head. “You’re cute when you act stupid. You might be one of the smartest people I’ve ever met, but you’re also one of the dumbest” 

Namjoon laid back and covered his head in one of the many pillows as he screamed into it. 

“I’ll see you tomorrow brother, rest well okay?” 

He waved, face never leaving the pillow. He wanted to hide himself from the world. Did he really say it out loud, or was his brother just that good at reading him? If he was being honest it didn’t really matter.

[coffeepurpleu]

On a Sweet Night, Be My Lucky Star (03)

Pairing : VampireTaehyung x WitchReader x DemonJungkook

Genre: Supernatural, Smut, Angst, a little of violence,Fluff (I'll try go with all lmao)

Serie: (still don't know how many longer will be, like chapters, but I'm going to make you enjoy it),about updates (there's will be not a specific day to update, *wink).

This will be my first fanfic here, English It's not my first language, so, if you have any suggestion I'll try it🏃🏻‍♀️.

CH01 CH02

"Small world I guess" I shrug getting up from the seat taking the drinks.

The three of us head over to the table where the others were sitting placing the drinks on the table,then I take a seat between the minty-haired boy and Taehyung, who looks like he wants to mention something.

"Nice to meet you, I'm yoongi" The minty-haired boy gives me a small nod, I reply with a smile. "I'm Y/N."

(Taehyung communicating telepathically with yoongi).

"Hyung, I think I messed up a little."

"Now what did you do?"

"I just didn't know it was her friend, I acted like I don't care and now that I know it's her, I feel bad."

"It's just a moment where we all make mistakes either unconsciously"

"But, Hyung"

"Ask her to dance and tell her, easy"

"Everything sounds easy for you"

"You're earning a hit"

"Okay, but if she rejects me I'll blame you for the next eternities, and you'll give me all your little bags of blood."

"Squealer, that won't happen"

"Jin, let's have a dance duel" I look at him defiantly.

"Oh, you want to lose" Jin arches an eyebrow.

"Can I try?" Namjoon asks getting up from his seat, I feel a small touch on my arm, I turn around.

"Can we talk?" Taehyung asks me quietly with pleading eyes.

"Sure" We both get up from the seat. "I think there's a nice balcony upstairs, if my memory serves me right" I mention.

"Have you come here before?" He asks me as we both climb the stairs making our way through the crowd.

"3 years ago, I met hwasa here" I reply opening the door to balcony, we walk in.

"That's weird, I never saw you around here" Taehyung leans on the balcony turning back towards me as I walk towards where he is standing.

"You frequent these places a lot don't you? Actually, that night I beat up a guy who wanted to overdo it with her, I didn't last long, just sitting at the bar" I shrug.

"I used to frequent them a lot, but I don't think there's any reason to do it anymore" He looks at me. "How come you used to sit alone at the bar, if you're beautiful" I chuckle.

"Hard to believe, but I wasn't stereotypical, maybe I wasn't charming enough to talk or something" I squint a little to see the moon shining down on us.

"You don't need to be inside stereotypes" Taehyung takes my hands gently. "I want to tell you so many things."

"Can I try to guess?" I chuckle, he makes a confused face. "Yoongi Hyung already told you, I knew I shouldn't trust him" Taehyung frowns.

"He didn't tell me anything" I slightly deny.

"So?" Taehyung pouts a little.

"How about we say it on the count of 3 at the same time?" I Ask

"Okay, 1"

"2-"

"You're my destined partner" Taehyung shouts making people turn to look at us.

"Hey, missing three!" I claim to his

"But-" Taehyung's eyes glaze over, ready to turn around and leave.

"I already suspected it, when I saw you at the art gallery, I felt a connection" I walk over to hug him laughing. "Don't cry"

"Really? why didn't you tell me?" Taehyung wraps his arms around my waist.

"When I turned to see you, you were gone" I caress his head.

"Because you were with your boyfriend weren't you?" He whispers

"Who? Namjoon? He's not my boyfriend, we're just friends" I laugh.

"Really?" Taehyung raises his head where we both stare at each other. I nod, he relaxes . "You know I thought he was going to kill me" We both laugh.

"He don't hurt no flies" I mention.

"Well, then can we get to know each other more?" He clasps our hands together.

"Sure but-" Before I finish speaking, he interrupts me.

"I'll go with you, I don't have anything here" Taehyung gives me his classic cute square smile.

"Are you willing to leave the things you lived here? I feel it's something to speed up-" I can't finish because he puts my hand on his cold cheek.

"Please, I've waited so long" he rests his cheek on my hand.

"Alright, come on it's getting cold up here" I take his hand back.

"Can I warm up-, Ouch" I give him a little smack on the back of his head.

"Not yet, you've been drinking" I give Taehyung a look.

"You maintain that we should do better without drinking? me too" He smiles as we go down to the dance floor

"And then what were you going to say" I arch an eyebrow.

"That I could warm you up, hugging you" Taehyung pouts

We see a crowd surrounding two people, we approach, I find Jin dancing butterfly style and Namjoon trying to twerk, I laugh causing Jin to pull me into the circle, I look at Taehyung asking for help but he is talking to Yoongi.

"Until you show up, go ahead show your talent" Jin steps back dancing.

"Done" I move dancing like jelly.

"Girl what have you missed" Hwasa enters the circle swaying her hips.

"Really?" I ask trying to pull away

"Where are you going?" Jin pulls me back.

"Ouch, I don't have good stamina, I want to sit down" I pout.

"It's ok, we might as well take a break" Namjoon looks at Jin.

We walk to the table where Taehyung and Yoongi are talking, in the blink of an eye Yoongi yells at Taehyung.

"You can't just decide what to do!" Yoongi stands up from the seat.

"I'm old enough to make decisions!" Taehyung bares his fangs.

"Oh yeah?! A few fucking hours ago you didn't know what to do with your life" Yoongi's eyes turn ruby red

"Can't you just support me...I've spent time looking for her, could you come with me Hyung" Taehyung stretches her arms to get closer to Yoongi, who frowns

"Everything okay?" Namjoon asks them.

"We shouldn't cause a scene here" Jin whispers looking at some guards watching us

"Sorry to cause trouble" I bow directing my gaze to Yoongi, who opens his eyes

"You're not causing any, it's just Hyung, right?" Taehyung takes my cheeks between his calloused hands.

"Yes, I've simply spent eternities taking care of this child, that I find it hard to believe" Yoongi snorts.

"See - what child, I'm an adult Hyung" Taehyung hugs me giving me a kiss on the head.

"Can we go then?" yawning

"Sure, who's driving?" Namjoon Asks.

"Well, Y/N has a sleepy face, in the blink of an eye she can kill us if she drives" Jin denies.

"Hey! You offend me" I pout.

"Hyung can drive" Taehyung looks at Yoongi in a plea.

"What about our car" Yoongi arches an eyebrow.

"How about I teleport us?" I smile

"No way, last time you left us on Mount Everest" Jin claims.

"But it was unintentional!" I pout, hiding in Taehyung.

"So?" Namjoon asks

"Let me try!" I look at Jin

"Fine, but I don't answer if something happens" Jin rolls his eyes, we get out in front of the cars.

"Now which car?" Taehyung looks at Yoongi.

"I'd rather miss yours than mine" Yoongi mentions teasingly.  

"Well, then I guess we can get in" Namjoon walks up to the Co-Pilot's door.

"I'll go in the back for safety" Jin climbs in the back.

"So see you later?" I look at Taehyung

"We can meet tomorrow, how about going out for lunch, Oh wait, your number" Taehyung holds out his cell phone, I shake my number but not a nickname, I try to see how to schedule me but he backs up, I follow him until he trips over a rock, I try to steady myself but fall on top of him.

"Get a room" Jin laughs.

"Don't be mean!" I stand up extending a hand to Taehyung blushing.

"Maybe we should" Taehyung takes my hand standing up, whispering to me.

"Tortolos show is over" Yoongi gets in the car.

"See you later dear" Taehyung kisses the back of my hand to walk to the car.

I get in the car to channel everyone's energy, I close my eyes visualizing my aunt's house, in the blink of an eye we are in front of the house.

"You finally made it!" Jin laughs.

"I've always made it" I glare at him.

"You know I never doubt you, I like to see you bring out the best in you" Jin winks at me

"Can we stay for a rest tomorrow?" Namjoon yawns

"Sure, but I think I'm going out" I murmur, opening the door.

"I still don't want grandchildren" Jin says goodbye to go to his room

"Rest" I say goodbye to go to sleep but I receive an incoming call, I watch Namjoon go down the stairs giving a little bow

"Hello Hello, is my precious gem still awake?" I hear Taehyung's hoarse voice.

"I was going straight to bed now, I can't feel my body" I put the phone on speaker as I get dressed to sleep.

"Then you need training" He laughs

"Thank you very much for the offer but I'm fine" I yawn lying down on the bed

"Did you get to the place okay what was it?" he asks me

"Pff, yeah, I'm good at this" I mumble.

"I'll pick you up tomorrow, get some rest" Taehyung blows a kiss before hanging up.

The day starts cloudy as I look out the window, I stretch before looking at the messages on my cell phone

Sunoo😶: Apparently the day looks gloomy today ;( Sunoo😶: Is it planned for another day?

XXX-XXXX-XXX: It's a nice day for a snuggle. XXX-XXXX-XXXX-XXX: Fun fact, I have a list planned to do together, Dearest

I decide to open the last few messages, I have a suspicion it's Taehyung.

Dearydeary💕: Who is it supposed to be? XXX-XXXXXX-XXX: I'm supposed to assume you gave your number to someone else...or don't you love me anymore?

I see a picture of taehyung smiling in red silk pajamas, I walk downstairs agendizing Tae, when I bump into Namjoon.

"Careful" He mentions before going up to the library with a coffee in his hands.

"Until you decide to come down, I thought you stuck to the bed" Jin puts two plates on the table, I take a seat.

"I didn't take too long" I put my cell phone aside to start eating, when I get a call from Taehyung, Jin takes my phone and answers for me.

"She is not available" Jin mentions seriously.

"Bullshit" I tell him eating trying to reach my cell phone.

"I just wanted to know if I could come and spend time with Y/N-" I hear Taehyung's voice as Jin puts it on speakerphone.

"Shu Shu, you already saw her last night, besides it's going to rain" Jin frowns.

"But it's not the same, I want to know her well" I hear him put sad voice. I look at Jin

"Fine but you'll have to pass the interrogation, if not, I'll tell Namjoon to help put a stake in you" Jin laughs before leaving and handing me my cell phone

"Don't listen to him, I'll protect you" I smile

"It shouldn't be like this, it would be the other way around, this vampire will protect his gem" Taehyung mentions it with a hoarse voice which makes me feel small

"See you in 15" I say goodbye before hanging up.

I take a quick shower before changing into comfortable clothes, I sit on the couch to make a video call to Aisha, she is an old friend who is studying medicine. I see her brown curls peeking out on the camera.

"Until you remember I exist" Aisha snorts.

"You're sometimes busy too" I pout.

"But I do send out signs of life, unlike you" She grimaces at me.

"Well, no fighting, how did it go?" We both laugh.

"Well, here's waiting for my knight in armor" She winks at me.

"Can you give me a dissection now?" I see her frown

"You're about to start, that's why you're still alone."

"I've got you" I wink at her, I see Namjoon walk behind and watch the video call

"Hi handsome" Aisha greets

"Hi" Namjoon waves and walks away with a book in his hand.

"You what?" I raise an eyebrow

"Is it yours?" Aisha pouts

"Of course not, mine is nicer" She smiles

"Did you manage to find your destined partner? What else haven't you told me? I'm already an aunt too?" Aisha speaks in surprise.

"Yes, not much has happened, you know I don't want children" I grimace.

"But if your partner wants to? Besides it would be nice to see little Y/N running around and coming to their aunt" We both laugh.

"Adopting is an option, and let's not keep talking about it, you'll be done with the semester soon right?" I ask

"boringoo, and yes, we should celebrate, I know what I want for a present" Aisha smiles mischievously

"What?"

"The guy I just passed with the book in his hands"

"I don't traffic people" I roll my eyes.

"But if you could, you would"

"Of course not"

I feel the doorbell ring, I look at Aisha, Jin comes down the stairs.

"Talk to you later" We say goodbye, I look at Jin leaning on the door blocking the entrance toTaehyung, I get up from the sofa.

"Jinnieeeeeee" I try to push Jin aside to let Taehyung in.

"Namjoon bring the stake!" Jin yells, I see Taehyung get nervous, I sneak into a small space and manage to hug Tae.

"Hello dear" Taehyung gives me a kiss on the head.

"So young man, let's go to the interrogation" Jin drags me back inside the house.

"Wait! I brought you something" Taehyung goes to his car, opens the car door taking out a bouquet of flowers and a box of chocolates. Jin gives space so we can talk better inside the house, Taehyung approaches me and hands me the things smiling.

"Thank you" I look at the bouquet, it contains daisies, and tulips.

"You're welcome-" Jin takes it to the sofa, Namjoon arrives with a stake.

"That's not necessary Jin" I mentioned putting the flowers in a vase, walking to the kitchen keeping the chocolates inside the refrigerator.

"I promise I'm not violent" Taehyung raises his hands in defense.

"What are your intentions?" Jin points the stake at him, Namjoon stands next to me.

"Is it normal for me to do that?" Namjoon asks.

"Well, as you may know, in my life I haven't had any steady partners, I literally haven't dated anyone" I shrug my shoulders

"So, it's your first time doing an interrogation?" Namjoon mentions, I nod"In a way, he's doing it right" We both laugh.

"I've finished the book" Namjoon smiles."That's good, are you reading a new one now?" I ask

"Yeah, under the same star" He nods.

"That one I read in high school, it made me cry" I pout as I see Jin saying a bunch of consequences to Taehyung if he lets me.

"Do you have a favorite book?" Namjoon asks.

"Not for now" I walk up to Jin touching his shoulder.

"I think I'm done now, but I'll keep an eye on him" Jin glares at him, thunder rumbles

"He won't do anything wrong, right?" I approach Taehyung to caress his head.

"I would never forgive myself"" Taehyung denies as he rests his head on my stomach.

"Well, can we eat?" I look at the clock, it's 12:30 and the rain is starting to come down

"I haven't made anything yet, if you want to make food with magic" Jin shrugs his shoulders.

"I promised to make lunch together" Taehyung looks at me.

"Did you bring any ingredients?" Jin looks at him.

"No, but-" Jin interrupts him.

"See? He didn't bring any" Jin frowns.

"But there you have ingredients, no problem" I mention.

I already missed this, got me thinking because I was waiting for my own actualization lol, this weekends was so crazy and stressed but anyway, thanks for the wait♡

(Love again is soo addict and complement the sven days📈)

Wordacount: 2,678k (too short i know😓)

All credits to coffeepurple_

[kimthwariru]

Like the wind

pairing: Kim Taehyung x reader

genre: smut, enemies to lovers, angst, collage au, rich kid!Taehyung

warnings: slight mention of religion and god

check out chapter 1 here

Chapter 2: Tell me pretty lies, look me in the face

Hating someone feels disturbingly similar to being in love with them. Love and hate are related to each other in a complex manner;they are visceral. Your stomach twists at the thought of that person. Your blood rushes to your cheeks when someone mentions their name, the heart in your chest beats heavy and bright, nearly visible through your flesh and clothes. Every interaction spikes your blood with a dangerous kind of adrenaline, your body is barely under your control. You’re consumed, and it scares you.

That’s exactly how you felt about Kim Taehyung.

You can’t quite explain it, but even though you didn’t fancy him all too much, there was a part of you that wanted him near you. The mere mention of his name made your blood boil. Especially after that night.

You’d never felt this way about a person before. One minute you wanted to kill him the other you wanted to fuck him. Was there something wrong with you?

Out of all people, why him?

The thing that had been bothering you lately, the question that has been popping up in your head ever since that day;how did he feel about you?

He hasn’t contacted once. Not a single message, and you knew he could get your number if he wanted to, the thing is, he didn’t want to. If he wanted to communicate somehow, he would have, and that just confirms the thought that has been hiding in the back of your brain, too ashamed to come out because of how embarrassing it would be to admit to such a thing to yourself;that Taehyung only used you for his own pleasure. That he didn’t actually care about you, but only about what you did together. You were another victim that fell for him, and that frustrated you.

“Yo are you even listening to me?” Jin’s voice woke you up from your daydreaming. It was the first day of college, Jin was trying to explain accurately every professor’s background and personality. It was sweet of him to offer to help you out, but you didn’t really need it, especially since you were having an entire inner monologue about how much you fucked up things with Kim Taehyung before the semester even started. “Repeat what I just said” he ordered

“I’ve got to be honest…” you began, but before you could even come up with a poor excuse as to why you had been staring at the empty space for what was probably 15 minutes, Jin interrupted you.

“You weren’t even listening to me!” He whined

“Sorry, I have quite the busy mind” you chuckled and pushed his shoulder hoping he would brush this whole thing away and not ask any questions. “it’s almost 10, I’ve got to go”

•••

It almost felt like a dream when you took your first step into Hashfield college. You thought you were mentally prepared for what you were about to witness in this school, but you immediately felt your jaw drop when your gaze caught on a striking woman with . . . questionable style. She wore a mink shawl in September, over a thin olive-green dress, and thigh-high boots. Long blonde hair fell in smooth waves, and with her fake eyelashes and large hoop earrings, she was like an ad to the seventies era. And, as if she wasn’t doing her job well enough, she blew a pink bubble and popped it, her eyes narrowing on you like you were the one whose style was four decades too late.

Now, judging someone based on how they dressed for school was not a habit of yours, but the attitude she was wearing along with her outfit was definitely annoying you a bit.

Just by the way she made a grimace at a couple of girls that simply passed by her, minding their own business (an asset very rare for insiders) screamed what type of girl she was.

You know the kind, probably a cheerleader, or a leader in some kind of attention seeking club, popular, possibly had every jock wrapped around her fingers. These type of girls, they never leave high school, they never abandon that mindset, it stays with them. Mean, cavalier, superficial... The kind who doesn’t have a thought stay in her head too long or else she needs a nap. If polar opposites were ever in the same room, it was her and you, undoubtedly.

She was surrounded by 2 fit guys and a red head that was carrying a handbag that matched hers. If she was Regina George then that was definitely Gretchen Wieners.To your disappointment, you watched as a very familiar back approached them. Kim Taehyung. Of fucking course he hanged out with that type of crowd.

The fact that you had to walk passed them to get to your class seemed like a form of torture. You wish the earth would just open in two, and shallow you in. You felt your heart beat faster and faster, and you tried to move quickly to avoid them like they were a bunch of hyenas and you were a sheep whose survival instincts had kicked in. As if things couldn’t get any worse, just when you were about to surpass them, thinking you’ve succeeded in staying invisible and out of Taehyung’s sight, you hear a male voice calling your name

“Y/n!! Surprised you actually showed up. Hope this sight lasts” Jungkook’s voice made a bunch of slurs rush to your mind.

You hated the fact that your gaze immediately met Taehyung’s, as if it was reaching out to him, or even worse, searching for him. He stood there, simply wearing gray nike sweatpants and a white Celine t-shirt, yet you swear he looked a hundred times better than any model you’ve ever seen. He was larger than life in this hallway. Or maybe, this hall was just small? No, it looked like a normal-sized hallway. Ugh, get a grip.

“Hoped you’d chicken out last minute” Taehyung’s indifferent voice ran down your spine, with a strange thrill following in its wake. You’d never admit it, but you had strangely longed for the the alluring feeling his voice gave you.

“Glad that my presence made all of you so excited” you scoffed

“Excited is kind of overselling it, don’t you think?”Taehyung answered almost immediately.

“I’d argue differently” You gave him a look that conveyed;you were definitely excited when you went down on me the other night, Kim Taehyung.

The blonde girl pursed her lips in annoyance when all of the attention had shifted from her to you “Excuse me, who even are you?” She regarded you like someone would watch Animal Planet—like you were another species and possibly dull entertainment.

“I really need to get to class-” You could feel blood rushing to your cheeks when Jungkook’s elbow rested on your shoulder out of the blue.

All these years had passed since the last time you were this close to Jeon Jungkook, however his aura had remained the same. Cold, alarming yet somehow attractive. You caught a glimpse of Taehyung’s eyebrow raising slightly. Almost as if he was jealous “She’s Y/N” Jungkook said “The outsider”

The girl’s face light up in surprise, like she had just met someone from a different planet “Incredible” A judgmental eye look traveled carefully from top to bottom. Your insides were flaming in anger, what was she looking at? “Never seen one so up close before. You’re quite the talk these days.” A condescending smile painted her rich blonde girl face. “I mean an outsider!. In Hashfield? It’s wild”

You swallowed your pride knowing that arguing with these types of girls would only do you harm. You took one last look at Taehyung but the minute your eyes locked he turned his head to the side, as if he was embarrassed to even look at you.

Strange. You’ve never seen him like this before.

“As I was saying, I really need to get to class.” Your tone cold and indifferent, completely masking the wide range of emotions you were experiencing all at once.

•••

You never really understood the way that some people romanticized university life.

In movies and television shows, it’s all soft acoustic indie music playing over the image of some girl reading in a library, and an attractive mysterious guy gazing at her from afar, time seemed to have almost stopped as he was slowly falling in love with her.

Reality was far less idyllic.

Studying at the library was a battle between you and your attention span, the constant whispers exchanged between two annoying friends that weren’t aiding your situation at all, and the long ass paragraphs that became intelligible after four sentences, so you had to restart again from the beginning a few times before you read through the whole thing—still not understanding half of it nonetheless.

After what seemed like an hour of struggling to comprehend the difference between salve and salvete you realized Latin would probably be a bit more difficult than you had initially expected. You got up and paced towards one of the many enormous bookshelves to grab a book called “The modern guide to the not so modern Latin” this should help, you thought.

“You going to stand there and stare at that book all day, or are you going to move? Pretty sure just looking at it won’t win you any points anyway” the smooth, low, familiar voice that left Taehyung’s downturned mouth caught you off guard. You immediately jerked your head up to face him. Messy dark curls fell in his eyes accompanied with unexpectedly delicate features and cold, somewhat impatient gaze.

You blinked at him blankly, your stomach dipped like a tilt-a-whirl. You were finally alone with him for the first time after that night, and just as the smell of freshly baked sweet potatoes with turkey brought you back to a Christmas dinner with your mom and aunt, his cologne brought you back to when he was all over you, kissing your neck. “Pretty sure you’re not getting any extra points for being a pain in the ass either, but hey, look at you” you replied quickly, finding your tongue and only narrowly fighting back the annoyance that threatened to seep into your tone.

He replied by simply curling his lips up slightly, almost as if he was amused by your response. His eyes flickered up to the bookshelf as he peeled his attention from you, probably scanning for some kind of book ad you took a moment to admire his sharp jawline. When he’d finally spotted it, he took a step forward and as if you were the same poles of a magnet, you took one back. He chuckled at your obvious try to avoid him and extended his right hand to grab a book that was titled “Everything and nothing about the history of religion”

“Didn’t have you for a guy that would read this stuff, thought you said you lost God a long time ago”

You watched as he quirked a dark eyebrow “Guess you haven’t forgotten everything about me” He slipped one hand into his pocket as his gaze fell down your body “You know, there’s a lot of time to read in here, and I’ve read it all” he sighted “Talmud, Torah, Quran, Tae Te Ching” he smiled at you “Buddhism, Islam, Judaism, Jainism. Figured if I was looking for God, I should look everywhere.” He made a pause “Came out of that an atheist” he shrugged his shoulders

“Bet that’s a story” you said, gesturing to the book he was holding

“It is and it isn’t. I’m just in the middle of a project right now, besides, history behind religion was always more fascinating to me than the religion itself”

“Oh right, well, that sounds interesting, I’ll leave you to it then” Really? You couldn’t think of a less idiotic response? He just opened up about something clearly personal and you were too awkward to keep a normal conversation flow going? Embarrassed, you took a step to go around him and completely disappear—but, before you could, something grabbed your wrist.

He grabbed your wrist.

His grip felt like a band of fire; rough, calloused fire. A cool breath of fear mixed with something boiling hot leaked into your bloodstream. He stood only a few centimeters away from you, his grip the only thing connecting the two of you.

“Just so I know, are we going to pretend that night never happened?” his deep voice reached your ears

“What?” You breathed, your train of thought lost because of the hand wrapped around your wrist. It wasn’t a hard grip, but it was heavy, firm, immovable. It made you aware of how much smaller you were, how unnerved and out of place you felt. How you couldn’t leave unless he chose to release you.

He took a step closer as he watched you with an inquisitive gaze. Your heart felt close to stopping and your skin was burning up. “Are you going to pretend my dick wasn’t inside your mouth a few days ago?” he lowered his voice and you felt like you were about to pass out.

“I don’t know, are you going to pretend you weren’t in between my legs?” You managed to say and tried to pull your wrist away but he didn’t let you go.

Your pulse fluttered when his thumb brushed your knuckles. A smile painted all over his face like he had just done something he was proud of. “You know, if you want another round, all you have to do is ask”

“You’re ridiculous, you know that?” You said, breathing out an annoyed sigh as you brushed a piece of hair back from your face “Stop treating me like some girl that’s obsessed with you” you tried to free yourself from his grip “Let go!”

His gaze came back to your face, and you looked at each other for a moment. His grip slipped down your wrist, palm, fingers. The rough pads of his fingertips brushed your softer ones, and made your heart skip a beat. “I don't regret a single second I've spent with you, do you?”

What the hell? That was the last thing you expected to hear from his mouth and you didn’t know how you were supposed to respond. “Is this one of your sick jokes? Pretending to mean all these things when in reality all you want to see is how l’ll react? Because I’m tired of playing this game Taehyung, not this time, not with you.”

“No games” he pulled you even closer to his body “can’t you just listen to me?”

“I would if you talked to me. Do you know why I always need to have my guard up when it comes to you? Don’t you remember how embarrassed I was when you played that whole prank with Jungkook?” You pushed him away “Asshole, what makes you think it’s ok to play with people’s feelings like that?”

Two years ago. Jungkook was the only person you’d talk to, he was kind and seemed to like everything you did. The day after you’d confessed your feelings for him, you found out that the whole thing, Jungkook hanging out with you and pretending to like you, was a whole show Taehyung had put up. He’d made Jungkook do it. How dare he play with someone’s heart like that? What if all this was set up by him as well? You could never be too sure with him.

“Y/n, about that-“

“No. I’m done with you and your excuses. Just leave me alone” You cut him off “That night, I was drunk, and horny, and out of my head. Was it your dick I sucked? Sorry, can’t seem to remember that well, my memory is quite foggy” scorn laced your tone. You were done with him this time, you felt your blood boiling just by looking at him—and not in a good way.

“y/n come on-“

“You know, I really think that alcohol isn’t good or bad. But the version that can come out of me when I have enough to drink…yeah, she is bad. She’s careless and selfish and does things that I would never do sober.” Your tone monotonous, and your heart heavy as you know deep down that what you’re saying isn’t necessarily the truth. But you have to find a way in order to get away from Taehyung, he is bad for you, and you’re scared this whole thing is just another prank he carefully set up for you to fall in. But you knew better this time. “There is…a saboteur inside of me. she did everything that night, got it? And she left me to deal with the consequences of her actions.”

Taehyung pushed you with his body against a bookshelf. His right hand resting next to your head while you tried your best to control your breathing “You’re seriously going to pretend you didn’t love the way my tongue licked every inch of your skin?” His face centimeters away from yours as he stared at you dead in the eyes “The way you moaned my name?” He brought his right knee slightly up, just enough to push against your heat, providing the right amount of pressure to make your tummy tense up. How did he manage to have control over you yet once more? “The way you begged to eat my cum?” he breathed

“Stop…” your tone not very convincing, as you clearly didn’t want him to stop what he was doing. His mere knee was making you wetter than any other man ever did. And you hated him for that, you hated him for being the only one that made sucking someone’s dick enjoyable, so much you’d think about it every single night before you went to bed.

But love and hate seem to have an interesting relationship inside your head.

“Why are you putting on this whole show, when you feel the same things I do?” He placed his lips on the side of your neck, giving it a small and gentle kiss before facing you again “you smell amazing, you know that?”

The impact of his stare found a way to touch your skin. Again, a thing only he could do. The memory of him naked and exposed played on a loop, intense and hot, in your head. Just so you didn’t look like an intimidated little girl, you held his gaze for a breathless second.

Feel the same things I do?

What the hell did he mean by that? He wasn’t suggesting he actually viewed that night as something more than a meaningless hook up, was he? “I don’t have time for this, I need to get back to studying-“

“Studying, yeah” he jerked his head slightly backwards and sighted, and you couldn’t help but stare at his prominent Adam’s apple as it slowly moved. “Feels like I’m talking to a fucking wall sometimes” he took a step back

“I thought you loved walls” you smirked and distanced yourself from him “Next time, maybe don’t ghost me” you said with an indifferent voice, and maybe for a split second you wanted him to stop you one more time, grab you by your wrist and pull you in for a kiss, you closed your eyes and painted that picture in your head. But he never did.

It was for the best. Kim Taehyung was bad news, you knew how he treated girls, made them feel special and unique until he decided he was done with them. You were not going to allow yourself to fall for his little scheme. You caught a glimpse of his eyes, it was almost as if he was annoyed by you, as if you were the one who acted like a pretentious dick all the time.

You hated mornings

You couldn’t possibly describe how much.

Which was weird, considering dawn was your favorite part of the day, but the cold and empty feeling that you got when you first open your eyes is cruel and torturing. No matter how much you’d sleep, you would always feel tired when waking up.

Another reason why you hated mornings was because you had to get ready for Hashfield college. You had to find the right clothes and fix your hair and makeup. Not necessarily because you wanted to fit in but because that would make your day much easier. And it sounds dumb, but that was the case and you had to live with it.

There’s one thing you enjoyed about your dull mornings though, and that was the daily morning gossip call with Mina. She’d tell you everything that had happened last night and it would always make you even more jealous for the fact that you didn’t apply to a normal University outside of town instead of Hashfield. You could feel Mina’s excited voice. She was free. And you envied that.

“Ugh one thing I miss about Outfield is the coffee man, there’s just no competition”

“Uhh yeah sounds awful Mina you wanna switch places with me? Life sucks but at least coffee is bomb so I’d say it’s worth it right?”

Mina chuckled “I'll ignore your usual morning chipper and tell you all about the date I had last night”

You were always thankful for the distraction Mina provided every morning “I’m all ears”

“Okay, so” you could basically hear her smile through the phone “ "I was at the bar the other night and ran into this guy, his name's Beck, and we immediately hit it off, We talked for like, two hours afterwards, and he asked for my number. Few days ago he called and asked if I wanted to go out with him, and I was like hell yeah let's tear up the town. Guy picks me up at my apartment in this sleek ass car, and takes me out to this fancy pants restaurant, letting me order whatever I wanted, I mean this dude is loaded. Eventually I ask him what he does for a living, since he's got cash falling from the fuckin' sky. Apparently he works for the fucking Kim family? Isn’t it crazy how small the world is?”

“The Kim family!?” You repeated, it shouldn’t come as a surprise, the Kim business was booming the last decade, Taehyung’s father might be a shitty person but he is an awesome businessman.

“Y/n… you wanna know what’s even crazier?”

“Well I can’t say no now, can I?”

There was a small pause before Mina spoke again “He told me Kim Taehyung is going to be engaged soon.”

Words wouldn’t come out of your mouth.

You knew insiders were engaged early, basically, their parents wanted to secure business merges by having their kids engaged. It did good for business and insiders didn’t want to get married to outsiders in the first place, so it worked.

But Kim Taehyung? For some reason, you always thought he’d be a different case. He was known for his recklessness and not completely adhering to the rules inside the walls. He’d sleep with a lot of women, insiders and outsiders. He didn’t care about the gossip and he certainly didn’t care about what his daddy would say.

So yeah, in a way, hearing these news shocked you in more ways than one. “Are you sure? How would he know?”

“Talks around the office. You know how these things go y/n, if daddy says it then it’s law”

You hated mornings.

Perhaps, in hindsight, the fifth drink had been a mistake.

He isn't drunk, maybe tipsy, he hates to admit that he has grown a tolerance for alcohol. These many drinks into the evening, Taehyung’s short term memory wasn't up to its usual standards. Standing in the door of the bathroom, Taehyung thinks, 'Why am I in here?' It takes at least five seconds before he remembers that he wanted to pee , he's had five drinks and three glasses of water, and things are beginning to get urgent.

“Come ooooon we only have one fucking bathroom in this whole place” he listened to Jungkook’s stammering voice from the door. They had the same amount of alcohol but Jungkook was having a rougher time than him. Considering he apparently forgot there are two more restrooms downstairs.

Jerking his head back, letting his curls fall down, Taehyung thinks of you.

He wasn’t going to, he made a promise to himself to flick away this attraction he seemed to have for you. It wasn’t doing him any good and he knew things with you should remain platonic for your sake. He wasn’t a good guy, and he liked you enough as a person to keep a disntace before fucking everything up—like always.

Was it a week ago? He recalls that’s the last time he talked to you, in the library. Fuck, he could still smell your perfume in his nose as if you were there with him.

But you weren’t.

You were in that other party with Seokjin and Zed down at Clair’s. Taehyung wouldn’t step foot anywhere near Clair’s house, she was crazy for him and things hadn’t ended up the way she wanted so she made sure to make Taehyung’s life a living nightmare instead.

But right now, all Taehyung was thinking about was how much he wanted to punch the shit out of Zed. That dude was an A class asshole that wanted nothing but get his way in your pants. He knew you weren’t going to give it to him, you were smarter than half of the insiders he knew, but he couldn’t hold his worry back.

“Come ooooon dude I will fucking piss my pants”

Taehyung laughed at the sounds Jungkook was making. He finished his business and opened the door chuckling. “You know there are other bathrooms here buddy, right?”

“Whatever” Jungkook blurred before immediately letting loose of his pants. He didn’t even have the sense of mind to close the door behind him.

Jungkook was a good kid, very misunderstood by everyone. Granted, he was a massive dick to girls, but that’s just because he had his heart broken by his first love, and it’s been downhill ever since.

He was like a brother to Taehyung, he was there when Taehyung’s parents had split up, probably the darkest Taehyung had ever been. But Jungkook remained by his side through it all, and Taehyung knew he’d never meet a friend like Jungkook again.

Taehyung and Jungkook didn’t fight, ever. Except well , this one time.

They fought one time over you.

Jungkook had met you while hanging out with some weird crowds outside of the walls, and he seemed to grow a liking towards you. You had similar interests and hobbies despite the different worlds you two were living in, Taehyung had to bite the inside of his cheek every time Jungkook mentioned your name as if it had honey dripping all over it.

Taehyung loves Jungkook, but he knew he wasn’t good for you, so he decided to lie to you and spread the rumor that Jungkook liking you was a prank.

He was stupid for doing that, but he blames his young age and blinding jealousy for that. He still remembers how offended Jungkook got, but he got over the whole thing pretty quick, at least until he’d found his next victim.

Jungkook was a good kid, but he wasn’t good enough for you, no insider was, including himself.

“You’re kind of off today, Taehyung” Brianna wrapped a hand around his waist “Something on your mind?”

A lot of things he couldn’t talk about, especially with her “Nah, just tipsy I guess”

“Oh my god Bri” Tess laughed at her phone like she had just seen the funniest thing of her life “Isn’t that the new outsider girl? y/n, was her name? Was it?”

The mention of your name made Taehyung look at Tess’s phone screen. It was a video of you throwing up in a vase of flowers with the caption ‘Guess outsiders can’t handle alcohol that well’

“I give her another month before she drops out.” Brianna was as toneless as always “Why on earth would she think that mixing with Hashfield was a good idea? Outsiders are a joke, honestly”

“Why do you care, Brianna? It’s just college, who gives a fuck anyways?” Taehyung interrupted, not even bothering to mask how annoyed he was.

When Taehyung imagined what he wanted from life, getting engaged with Brianna was never on his list. It wasn’t even a thought that occurred, until his good-for-nothing ambitious father decided that the Arden family was doing massive numbers in sales. So what better way to merge businesses than to engage him to the Ice queen?

Jesus, his father was a lost case. Tae swore to himself that he’ll never go through with the deal. His plan was to finish Hashfield College as fast as possible and travel around the world, get far away from the fucking wall.

Brianna scoffed, as if she had just heard the most ridiculous thing in her damn life. “just College?” She eyed him “Taehyung, it’s Hashfield”

“Whatever.” He rolled his eyes so fucking much he thought he saw his brain for a second. People like Brianna were not to be reasoned with. “Me and Jungkook are heading to the after party.”

“The after party? I think you’ve had enough to drink already” She lectured him as if she was his goddamn mother, she wasn’t.

“Didn’t know thinking was one of your abilities, you keep surprising me” His tone was rougher than usual but he didn’t really care. Plus the O shaped face she just made was the most amusing thing she’d done all day today. “Cmon Jungkook, let’s go”

•••

If you could get an image stuck in your head forever, it would be Taehyung’s face when he saw you walking out of the bathroom giggling with Zed, heading to find the others downstairs.

Of course, nothing had happened with Zed, he just wanted some help throwing all that tequila out of his system because he drunk a little more than he could handle, which was not much to begin with.

But Kim Taehyung’s expression was painted in your mind. Almost as if he was ready to punch Zed in the face.

Whatever.

What was he doing here anyway? Last you heard, he was at some fancy party with his girlfriend—or should you say fiancé, Brianna.

You don’t remember the last time you actually locked eyes with him since that run-in at the library. During lectures, you’d pretend he wasn’t there, but that only made it worse because you ended up constantly thinking about him. His mere presence was a constant burden. Kim Taehyung was a demon, or the devil himself.

The ninth circle of hell was not in some deep bowel under the earth, it was right here, in front of Clair’s Olympic sized swimming pool. Taehyung removed his shirt and dived in with a couple girls following him soon after. His hair wet and all over the place, locks falling loosely in his eyes, his body shiny under the moonlight and that fucking smirk all over his face. How could a man look this attractive?

“Fucking hell” you hear Celine basically moan.

Yeah, everyone was starring at the half-naked prince of Hashfield. Including you, and he noticed. You hate that he caught you looking

You quickly averted your eyes back to your phone, you didn’t want to give Taehyung the satisfaction of starring at him. Especially now, that he was acting like he had you down already.

“Fuck he’s hot” Nessa’s mouth had more water than the pool itself.

“I know right?” Jess exhaled deeply “Imagine fucking that”

Imagine fucking that

You cursed all sorts in your brain. Of course everyone wanted him. What’s not to like? A mysterious bad boy image, money, the fame of half the world, and soon to be C.E.O of the Kim cooperation. He was THE shit, and the worst part about it;he knew it.

The way he’d glance at all the girls that were eyeing him up and down, he felt the stares and he was feeding off of them.

“Jess your jaw is hitting the ground” Jin teased and in response he got a slap on the shoulder.

Your eyes jumped back at the pool, only to catch Taehyung starring back at you, his eyebrow cocked up, his expression was like an invitation, a dirty one. He watched as you took a sip of your drink, not breaking eye contact for a split second. This had been the longest you had starred at him. His eyes pierced through your soul, and you burned so much that no amount of ice could cool you down.

The devil.

“What do you think about him? Kim Taehyung” Zed bumped your shoulder resulting in that eye contact to break.

“I don’t know. . . Arrogant dick sounds like a nice summary” you faked a smile.

Arrogant dick was one way to describe him, among other things you wouldn’t say out loud, ever.

Zed chuckled at that. “Yeah, I don’t like the dude much either. He’s too lost in his own little fantasy world his good daddy built for him”

Wow, ironic much? Considering that was the case for most people around them, including him.

“It’s not his fault his daddy got money” Defending Tae was not your intention, but that statement was true. Sure, his father was this Hashfield King everyone admired yet feared, but it wasn’t Taehyung’s fault he was born into his family.

“I guess…”

He guesses. As if Zed wasn’t a nepotism baby. Living in the shadow of his family’s wealth. Probably marrying another woman that did the same.

•••

If it was one thing you enjoyed doing in those good-for-nothing outsider parties, it was to stroll around the huge mansions they were held in.

So many rooms that looked more like museums or modern art galleries that no one took an interest in because they were too busy getting fucked up by the jacuzzi or had no taste for such things to begin with.

Your eyes caught an enormous half opened wooden door with golden details on the side. You enter the room to find out it was an office. The place was a perfect square with a blue, stylish couch, a mahogany desk with a couple chairs in front of it, a flat-screen TV, and a minibar.

The walls were concrete, but with the gold and blue oriental rug and nothing but one piece of artwork on the wall, the room was somehow warm and comfortable.

You studied the painting that sat behind a shiny piece of glass. Pastel colors and bold yet refined sweeps of a brush. You weren’t much of an artistic person like your mother, but you recognized the work. You’d watched a documentary about the downfall of modern art. That what we consider art today is a poor example of the talent and heart of art in the past.

“Got lost trying to find the bathroom again?” Taehyung’s voice made goosebumps run down your back.

How did you two always manage to end up in the same places? Manage to read the same books, enjoy the same movies, like the same music? “Stalker alert”

You turned around and met his face. A thick atmosphere hung in the air. “Don’t flatter yourself” he scoffed “I’m impressed that leach Zed isn’t here with you, I thought you two were a package deal” He downed his drink and paced around the room, his attention moving from your eyes to the painting behind you.

“I could say the same thing about you and Cruella de Vil”

He laughed at that. A soft laugh, the kind that could melt your heart. “I can’t tolerate Brianna for more than an hour honestly”

“You’re not that tolerable yourself either”

Taehyung remained silent. His gaze fixed on the only painting in the room. And all you wanted to do was touch him just to make sure he was actually there, and you weren’t dreaming.

You should’ve gotten out of that room the minute he got there. He was trouble, and it was best to stay away from him, but for some fucking reason you found yourself glued there, gazing at him as if he was god himself.

“The Cliff Walk at Pourville” he suddenly broke the silence.

“Didn’t take you for a guy who would have a soft spot for Monet”

He turned his head, his dark eyes found yours and for a moment you felt your head spinning. “My mama was a fan” Your stomach warmed at the deep way mama rolled off his lips. “She had good taste” He laughed quietly. A bitter note showed through, and he wiped his amusement away with a palm like he’d just realized what he’d done. “You know why she liked about The Cliff Walk at Pourville so fucking much?” He clicked his tongue “It looks like the beach surrounding the wall. She said if she could paint freedom, it would look like that” he tapped the painting with his finger sort of aggressively. “And now she is free and I’m left alone in this fucking cliff”

Was that anger in his tone? Or maybe disappointment…? You figure it was a cocktail of the two. For some reason, your heart broke. You knew how much he loved his mum, you haven’t heard any news about her. Kim Taehyung’s father was a mean and cruel man, but how cold does a mother have to be to leave behind her only son like that?

“Don’t you like it here?”

His eyes wondered around the room, almost as if they were avoiding you “I don’t know…I mean it’s Hashfield right? I should be on my knees thanking the fucking God that I get to live inside the wall.” He breathed “The Damn wall”

“I can’t figure you out. I thought you enjoyed all of this…”

His drunk gaze found yours.

And you swear you lost sensation in your legs. He was a statue, something out of this century, maybe he was a reincarnation of Achilles. Or maybe he was not human.

His lips were slightly apart and his eyes were almost sparkly under the light. He smiled and finished what was left of his drink “I’m afraid you will never figure me out”

You rolled your eyes. Even drunk and out of his head he remained stubborn and an annoying know-it-all. “Why not?” You returned the smile, weirdly amused by the fact that his nose had turned slightly red from all that booze.

“I’m a paradox” His eyes tried to fix on you for a minute but soon flattered “I want to be happy, but I think of things that make me sad. I’m lazy, yet ambitious. I don’t like myself but I also love who I am.” He took a long breath “I pretend I don’t care, when in reality I do. I crave attention, yet reject it when it comes my way. Im a conflicted contradiction. If I can’t figure myself out, there’s no way anyone else can”

At that point, every last piece of your armor disintegrated. You felt Taehyung was being genuine with you, for once. He told you something about himself. He let you inside a corner of his brain. There was no pretense, it was just you, him and the Monet painting behind you.

“You miss your mother?” A gulp in your throat, you couldn’t hold this question back.

He exhaled “Everyday”

“You know, I used to think that losing someone went hand in hand with losing a part of yourself. That losing a person close to you was like giving away a little bit of who you are every time you said goodbye. But that’s not always true. Some losses, some parting of ways, are essential for our personal growth. When we burn a bridge, we allow something new to grow from its ashes. Something that wouldn’t have gotten the chance to bloom otherwise. So most of the time loss actually goes hand in hand with a new beginning, a new chance, even if it takes us years to see the change and to realise that maybe it was for the best. With every person you lose, with everyone you willingly let go, you get to know a part of yourself that was hidden before.”

He looked at you carefully as he took the remaining steps towards you. His cologne pierced your nose and nerves played beneath your skin when instead of stopping he came closer, wrapping an arm around your waist to pull you closer “You’re really something, you know that?”

You pretended this position didn’t effect you at all, but in reality your heart raced from the shock.

“Y/N..” You turned your head to look at him. your breath shallowed when you realized his lips were only inches from your own. His gaze was warm, seeing deeper beneath your skin with each second. “Why are you here?”

You frowned your brows “I just…I like snooping around these big houses, I’m not really used to them. Plus if I have to sit through one more insider small talk I will drown myself in the pool. By the way did you know this house has like six pools? how many do you even need-“

“I mean Hashfield. Why on earth would you come to this place? I know you hate it”

“You’re right” A deep breath “I never wanted to come to Hashfield. It was not this big dream everyone thinks I had.” You exhaled and took a sneak peak of the way he was looking at you. He made you feel like whatever you were about to say was of importance. And it was. “The biggest mistake I’ve ever made was thinking time didn’t exist for me. I was young and stupid and convinced time would bend to my will like reeds bend to the wind. I was going to be a high schooler forever, you know? I had no plans, no dream job, nothing. But for whatever reason, I was always good with school. My grades were always top of the class and my teachers constantly praised me. That’s when my mum recommended that I try out for Hashfield. She really believed in me. No one ever believed in me but she did.”

“You never told her you didn’t want to come here?” He asked, rightfully so.

“I kept the words that could change everything lodged under my tongue, too scared, too shy, too embarrassed to say them out loud. Because what should I tell her? That I’ll reject the greatest opportunity anyone could have? That all the hard work and support she gave me was for nothing?” You sighted “I was going to tell her, eventually, I was sure about it. I thought I could put it off for another week, at least. The week became a month. And then the acceptance letter came and it was too late…Time. I had ran out of time.”

The dim lighting made his eyes look like burnt gold. “I guess one good thing came out of that”

“What?” You asked, already knowing the answer in your head, but you wanted to hear it from him

“We met again”

“We met multiple times outside the walls before, you know”

“Yeah” a faint smile “but that was different” he made a pause “I was different”

Tension crept between the two of you, finding its way between your legs and settling there like a heavy weight. You found yourself thinking about so many things. You wanted to see what was beneath that white shirt. You wanted to know how much little effort it would take for him to hold you down. You wanted to put out this fire inside you that had been there since the last time he touched you. But then. The words escaped your mouth as if they had a mind of their own “I heard you are getting engaged”

His gaze found yours, and the gold blackened around the edges. Your pulse pirouetted to a strange dance. “You heard?” his voice darker than usual

“I’m surprised more people don’t know about it. You’re like a prince around here”

“That’s because it’s not official yet” he exhaled a deep breath “My father is in the midst of some big deal and apparently he wants me to be the seal of it.. He can go fuck himself. I’m not planning to be a pawn in his game.” The anger quickly turned into amusement as he saw your face “Why princess, you thought you had lost me forever?”

With his body pressed against yours, warming you from the inside out, the pull to lean in was a physical thing. A heavy tug, as if he was your center of gravity. You could taste his breath and feel his strong heartbeat.

How easy it would be; to bury your fingers in his hair, to run your hand along his jawline, to meet your mouth with his.

You knew it would be the best kiss you’d ever have.

But you manage to tame that urge. Almost as if the two sides inside of you were fighting and hopefully this time, reason was winning. “Will you let go of me?”

To be fair. You weren’t making much of an effort to free yourself from his grip.

“I don’t want to.”

You loved his voice and the way he said that.

What was wrong with you? “Let me go”

“You’re not very convincing”

“You’re a dick”

“You always say that”

“Cause it’s true”

“Well I guess I’m a dick with a very kissable mouth then”

You cringed at the memory of you admitting he has a kissable mouth. It was true, but he didn’t need to know that. “Remove your hands Kim Taehyung”

Just when he was about to open his mouth and say something -probably very annoying- his phone rang.

“You should take that, maybe it’s your fiancé”

He raised his eyebrow in annoyance and checked his phone. The name on the screen wrote ‘Jungkook’ and you felt your throat dry up from the memories that hit you.

Kim Taehyung was not a good person to you, why were you in his arms?

“It better be important Jungkook” he answered his phone.

KIM TAEHYUNG P.O.V

“Look man, I-I didn’t do it okay? I mean-I mean I did it’s just- I had a lot to drink and Jimin was teasing me, saying I was a pussy and too scared to do it”

He closed his eyes and exhaled.

This couldn’t be good.

“What happened Jungkook. Fucking spill it”

He stared as you reached for your phone in your back pocket. It had been vibrating for a while. Who was texting you so impatiently? Was it Zed? Seokjin?

“I told Zed about the bet. I told him that we made a bet and you won, that you’d slept with y/n. Look man I’m sorry I-“

Your expression turned cold when you read the text messages on your screen. “What the fuck!?” You yelled as you pushed your self away from him. Your eyes slowly turning up, meeting his own. He could tell whatever you read probably broke your heart right there and then

He had fucked up. Big time.

“What the fuck is wrong with you, Kim Taehyung?”

Jungkook was continuing his rumble making a half assed apology when Taehyung hangs up the phone. Trying to calm you down “Y/n I’m sorry I didn’t-“

“I knew it…” Your expression was empty, almost cold, Taehyung had never seen you like this before. You were always bright and warm. You were the only person he felt comfortable around, but right now… he could barely look at you in the eyes. “I can’t believe I trusted you. Kim Taehyung. A fucking bet?” You basically growled “Over who gets to fuck me? You truly are your father’s son.” He could taste the bitterness out your mouth when you spat that.

“Y/n… I can explain… please” He needed to explain to you…what? That you were lovely and smart and better than anything he deserved? That he was twisted, crooked, wrong, but not so broken that he couldn’t pull himself together into some semblance of a man for you?. That without meaning to, he’d begun to lean on you, to look for you, to need you near.?

Would you even believe him if he did tell you that? He thinks not. And he deserves the way you’re looking at him right now. Like he was garbage, because maybe, he truly is his father’s son. “I’m sorry… you can’t imagine how sorry I am y/n…”

It didn’t matter how much he begged for forgiveness, that look in your eyes told him you were done with him for good. For every step he took toward you, you took two steps back. Every time he thought he’d made some sort of progress, that he’d finally gotten somewhat closer to you, you slipped away again, like a shadow, like the wind, like a ray of light, simply refusing to be captured.

To be continued. . .

taglist:

@nikkiordonez12 @travelleratheart101 @chr1sht @theaufanartist @tetesland @world-moon @ratedbangtann @chimchoom @pnkoo @taehyungedd @turnthepageandbeburnt @glitteryouid @jkbangtan7

Sorry for taking this long, cheers! Happy new year

[biaswreckmepls]

Fan-Chosen BTS fics #4 - April 2024 - Day 2

Dyadic

AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26781016/chapters/65331019

Author: julia_with_luv

Rating: Mature

Relationships: Jeon Jungkook/Kim Taehyung

Status: Completed

Chapters: 36/36 (220639 words)

Tags: Dragon AU, Dragon Rider AU

Summary:

For decades dragons have been hunted and used by the military as the ultimate weapons, controlled by the Riders who dictate their every move. Rookie dragon rider Jeon Jungkook enters the Rider's Corps hoping to be different from the rest.

But when he meets the defiant and volatile new capture Taehyung more than just sparks fly. It's an inferno.

(previously posted and completed on twitter, now 'remastered' on AO3)

AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26781016/chapters/65331019