#ben x tori

[googly-eyed-plank]

If The Outlaws had YouTube Channels (Part 1)

RANI • She'd seen how fun it looked to get on the social media train from various other people at school, but she was never allowed to make accounts herself when she was really into it, but did anyway, behind her parents' backs. She'd often use filming equipment from school or her mother's phone whilst she was busy, and send the footage to her school email for editing on the library computer, but wittled it down to filming on her own phone once she'd gotten one. • (Pre-Community Service) She started out with basic little things, like making lyric videos of her favourite songs - she was young at the time, so not all of the early ones have exactly the best colour palette, but they still did well in spite of this. Once she was older, and had her own phone, she moved onto trying to make study help videos, in a bid to make her own study sessions less draining, and made a fairly successful series on certain subjects (primarily mathematics). • (Post-Community Service) The uploads lessened, and the study series ended, and while it was a stupid idea, the thrill of potentially being found out enraptured her, and she began doing discrete haul videos of all the items she'd "bought" that day. These were less popular. • After running away, all her videos have since been privatised, and she unsubscribed from everyone else's accounts. She still follows Ben on an alt. • Rani currently has 40 subscribers, who were interested in the channel before it went idle, and forgot to unsubscribe. The Community Srevice guys used to be subscribed, but unfollowed at various points in time. • John was happy to unfollow after finding out about Rani dumping Ben, and Greg did so too, as he felt bad for Ben (given he's also been dumped numerous times), Ben took a while to unfollow, but did a few weeks before meeting Tori, and Gabby (with a little convincing there was no "tea" to be seen) and Myrna also did the same after this.

BEN • He started the channel a little while after he was dumped by Rani, deciding this would be a good venture to keep himself occupied instead of thinking about her, and finds himself actually enjoying it. • For the content? Cooking tips, mostly. Making food is one of his passions, and making people happy through something so simple is something that means a lot to Ben. While he won't do any tutorials for special dishes (gotta keep those recipes secret!), he does take requests for other things, and often replies to comments to try and help out others and their cooking journies where he can. • Often livestreams making a dish to allow for people to ask questions, and uses any donations to place in the fund to pay back Rani's parents for the loan. • He also promotes the foodshack from time to time, and manages to build a nice little community for himself. • After meeting Tori, she shows up on his channel quite a lot, most often on livestreams, where they reminisce on things that've recently happened, and joke about as Ben cooks. • Is doing very well for himself and currently at 3k subscribers and counting (some of his audience transferred over from Tori's channel). His biggest supporter is Tori, and he always pins the lovely comments she leaves on his videos.

TORI • She created her account on her 13th birthday, after also recieving her first ever pair of rollerskates. She had tried rollerskates before at a friend's party, and had always wanted a pair of her own as a result, so once she got them, she was only too excited to show them off. • Her first video was reviewing the skates and tattling off different facts and specifications she'd been researching leading up to this moment. • From there, it was mostly a lot of practising videos, and showcasing of cool tricks she'd learnt or come up with. At the end of each year, she'd upload a "best of" compilation, edited together with the help of her father. • By the time she was 16, she felt fully confident in her abilities, and while she still had some things to learn, she started making more tutorial videos, and reviewing/trying out other rollerskates she could get her hands on (at one point, a rollerskating place even sent her a free pair to review on the channel after liking her content for the last pair of theirs she'd bought). • Sometimes goes to the skate park to show them off, and livestreams with the use of a camera off to the side (managed by her dad), and a GoPro for different angles. Once she met Ben, he began manning the miscellaneous camera for her, so the lives became more frequent. • Once she and Ben starting dating, he began to appear a lot more in her videos, often holding the camera and giving commentary, and sometimes even being given lessons to see how he would do. • On special occasions (such as her birthday), Tori would begin recording small and sweet vlogs to upload, just letting her audience know how things were going. • Tori currently has around 10k subscribers, thanks to her stunning moves and the additional help of one of her skating videos getting somewhat popular on another platform. She's thankful for the happiness she gets to give to people through her content.

[eyo-its-li]

i love making memes but ik im going to cry when it happens

[buckyeah]

Thanks for making Heartstopper a bit angsty this season, Alice Oseman. I can handle it like this but not the tooth rottingly cute sweetness that was season 1.

[solitarybookdragon]

"Ben laughs a very attractive laugh" YES FINALLY a book that shows that you can find people objectively attractive but not be attracted to or have a crush on them

[imjustavenuxwithaboomerang]

I FINISHED HEARTSTOPPER SEASON 2

last two episodes exclusive (mostly anyway) notes:

sahar is still my girlfriend (also her being bi means i have a chance IM KIDDING)

tori kicking david's phone out of his hand is so joyful to me

tao and elle being together makes my bi heart soar like who do i wanna be more ya' know (i've mentioned that already but it's still true)

darcy's mom has been added to the 'worst parent in media' list in my brain (along with terri, lynne, and cash from hsmtmts and donald from lab rats)

i will never forgive people spoiling season 2 plotlines (like aroace isaac, harry's low-key redemption arc, charlie's ed, tao and the outing situation, etc.) under season 1 reaction videos

it really was the best idea to have tao cut his hair cause otherwise i would not take him seriously

im loving tao's mom rooting for him and elle

i still don't like nick's dad and sarah is so right about him not getting a say in david and nick's lives

all of the dresses at prom looked so pretty

^i love pretty dresses so much, if i see a pretty dress, i shortcircuit

"i love your hair" yeah nick, we could tell from you noticing the haircut earlier in s1

i've been informed that ben won't be in the show anymore and im just like-

^GIVE ME THE PRETTY MAN JUST HAVE HIM BE SILENT AND IN THE BACK, AWAY FROM CHARLIE

i can get behind them setting up sahar and imogen

i love tara just casually being on nick's shoulders while decorating

i really enjoyed this show and i will be looking forward to s3

[othernicknameisgaslighter]

Thank you to everyone who got me to 1000 likes!!!! I appreciate it so muchhhh!

[annoyingvoidzombie]

Heartstopper 2x01 Out:

The Pictures they took in the booth in the episode before! + The bday present

"Good morning Boyfriend ❤️" not crying not crying

Lift your head dude, there's so much more than sexting

Charlie is happy, truly happy so yayyy

Nick tells Charlie he came out, and "well done" kiss and omg so cuteee

Mmm Charlie's bedroom makeout and such great couple moments that all ends with them loving eachother

Bed scene, ohhh something getting steamy

The sparks the sparks

They're just sooo happyyyyyy

"I HAVE A BOYFRIEND" yes Charlie we know, the world knows

Tao X Elle just do something already, fighting over the apple juice isn't what we had in mind but sure ..

Imogen you're so fun and pretty

Some test plot

Oh shit, Ben Vs Nick, that won't end well for some

Mr. Farouk sure is loving his new power

Wow Nick is cold ass

Rugby? Again love? Didn't you learn ?

Nick teasing Charlie with love

Tara x Darcy are so adorable and Elle's relationship mummies

Tao hair cut, and Elle touching it, he must be freaked out

Chocolate is a present? Since when...

Okay, now we know that chocolate and Oreos are it their thing also it's Nick's favourite

Locker room kiss

"BUT KISSING SO FUN" oh Nick, you're head over heels

Eiffel tower kiss!! Me? Crying?

Tori spring is the biggest Narlie shipper, sipping on her drink and loving seeing them as happy

Knees touching, shoulders too is PG13 make out basically and now fingers too

Sleepovers, really?

Welcome to the group Imogen, beautiful thing, you deserve to have them in your life too

Nick trying to coming out to Imogen.. having his difficult time

"draw me like one of your french girls" okay Tao, okay.. your crush is showing

Why can't they kiss already??

I would have loved to have this kind of friends group growing up

Nick is such a big spoon to Charlie little spoon

Tao making some excuses

Thank goodness Imogen is so blunt, and now she sure knows how to act as "an ally" but Ben? Well.. I kinda saw it coming

Again with all the hugssss

They're kissing infront of everyone and they truly don't care

Charlie is happy, he truly is

Charlie didn't saw this one coming, no one did, "hanky panky" wow

"I can protect him" wow baby .. you truly love him and your sister loves you!

[theredandwhitequeen]

Book 5 of the 50 book challenge. Solitaire by Alice Oseman. Solitaire is her first book and written before the heartstopper web comics. It follows Tori Spring in high school, Charlie and Nick are together and it’s after Charlie was hospitalized for his eating disorder and self harming. It has a bit of a mystery to it and it had Charlie having his eating disorder come up. Tori is a bit of a mess but it feels like her parents aren’t paying attention to her in the way she needs. She has some disordered eating problems as well. Nick is around as well. She makes friends with Michael who is new to school and her friend is involved with Ben Hope which is not great. It’s a ok book, but it has an unreliable narrator so it can be hard at times.

[cursiveinkwords]

rAHHHH

HEARTSTOPPER OMFG.

I'm going wild

(and crying but besides the point)

It was so compelling and cute and heartbreaking all at the same time, and overall was just an impeccable show ❤️❤️

nick and charlie just keep getting better ahhh <333

Wish there was Michael Holden incorporated ngl but the show was amazing!

Looking forward to seeing when season 3 is out :)

(on a side note, happy there won't be ben in season 3 but WE LOST BASH 😭)

[celestialspecial]

I absolutely LOVED crimes of passion!!!!! it was such an emotional rush!! I wanted to ask if there are chances that you'd continue it??

I was planning on making a second part but it didn’t seem like there was much interest so I tabled it for the time being but would definitely write another chapter at some point!!

[honorhearted]

The first cuffs against his chest, shoulder and face caught Benjamin unawares. Lifting his arms, he was quick to deflect Emma's irate blows, her growls akin to a trapped animal as she bit out her fierce warning.

“What is wrong with you?" she hissed. "Jesus H. Christ, do you have no shame?”

Face stinging with both embarrassment and the clip from her earlier strike, Benjamin fired back, "I could ask you the same question. As you'll recall, the only reason we have been remotely intimate is because of you. Am I suddenly wrong in thinking I have a claim?"

He knew he didn't. As a gentleman, just pretending to mean those words coiled sickeningly within his gut, weighing low and heavy as he swallowed. Never one to back down from a ruse, he continued, "The only shame I feel is having trusted you to be a lady. Throwing yourself at my associate -- to what, make me jealous? -- proves your precise caliber, and I'll have no part in this."

Just as he anticipated, Emma bristled like a furious feline. “I can pursue whoever I damn well please. You're not my father and you're certainly not my husband. So, if Mister Finnegan likes me, I don’t need your permission to reciprocate his affections."

"No, you don't," Benjamin crisply agreed, "but Finnegan is one of my oldest and dearest friends, and thus, he would never choose you over me. I'm afraid brotherhood extends far beyond the allure of getting inside your used mutton. And that goes for both Finnegan and myself."

His words were a cruelty. Benjamin wasn't certain if he genuinely believed Emma to be morally loose, but in this moment he was tired of putting up with her theatrics -- he was tired of searching for intelligence, and only encountering the bare minimum because of her damnable interference.

Emma, unfortunately, was far from through with her diatribe. She sniped and attacked for all she was worth, relying heavily upon blaspheming swears before she ultimately volleyed, “Or do you merely mean to stick your nose into this because you’re upset it isn’t you I’m flirting with?"

"I don't give a damn who you flirt with," Benjamin hissed. "But when it is at the expense of my best friend, that is an entirely different matter! You flatter yourself if you think I care for you beyond our business transaction."

Emma balled her hand into a fist. “Our agreement was that you behave yourself. That very same agreement is the only thing stopping me from giving you a matching bruise on the other side of your stupid face. Either follow the rules of the game, or the deal is forfeit.”

Benjamin's jaw tightened. "Hit me then," he challenged. "If only I must behave myself in these terms, then I think it only suitable that you show the world precisely who you are."

Finally at her wits end, Emma rose her voice to a clanging decibel, shouting about Caleb being the superior match, and how she would gladly consider marriage, should he propose.

“I might remind you that I gave you the chance to act upon your carnal desires, but you refused. You had the chance to kiss me, touch me, ravish me, and whatever else you please, but you thought your hand far more suitable for the job, so you don’t get to choose me now that your britches have grown too tight."

Benjamin balked at that, visibly stunned. This woman was confounding. She denounced him, insulted him, and in some cases, maimed him, yet willingly threw open the doors to her boudoir?

Mouth opening and closing, he tried to speak, but Emma was already charging toward the door. "I urge you to behave yourself, or I will match your immaturity. And I will do it far better than you."

"I'd say you already have," he gruffly bit back. "You are no lady, Miss Dunster. None at all."

“You flatter me, Mister Bolton.” She retorted in a dry tone. “But I have a feeling I’m not the only one who thinks poorly of you. I’m just the only one brave enough to do something about it. I'm not some arse-kisser who's going to lick your boots like the rest of your conquests might be eager to do. I, for one, despise you and I will not allow you to forget it.”

I told you to leave Finnegan alone. I told you, I told you, I told you. The more he told her things, the less she wanted to listen, but he didn't care. Emma knew that men like him were probably used to people taking his word as gospel. While the world bent to his every whim, she would stand her ground and remain resilient against his orders.

"What makes you think I'm inclined to listen to you? I told you I won't marry you, but you don't listen to me. It's awfully frustrating, isn't it?" Emma crossed her arms over her chest, knowing full well that she was being catty over the situation, but too deep into her ire to backtrack. “Besides, I enjoy the sea as well. I spend a lot of time on ships traveling across the pond. Perhaps, him and I might find ourselves married to it together. And far, far away from you.”

He gritted his teeth and Emma thought, for a split second, that he might raise his hand to strike her. She braced herself for the force of his hand, but when it clasps onto her neck and brought her closer to him, she froze. It took her a long moment to realize what was happening, in the moment and in her body as she resisted the urge to wrap her arms around him and tug at his clothes. His soft groan sparked a fire in her stomach and she nearly gave in until he tugged on her lip with his teeth and broke the spell.

“Get off of me!” Breathlessly, she shoved him away, batting at him with her arms like a feral cat. Her lips still tingled with the taste of him but she tried to ignore it. It scared to her to think that if she'd spent a moment longer kissing him, she might not be able to control herself. If she spent another second with his tongue in her mouth, she might end up begging him to take her virtue here on the barn floor.

“What is wrong with you? Jesus H. Christ, do you have no shame?” The words flew from her lips with a small spray of spittle, her own mind unsure of who the words were directed at. Shaking her head of the embarrassing thoughts, she wiped at her mouth with the back of her hand. It didn’t matter that she wanted to continue, that she enjoyed the way her body warmed at his touch. She didn’t want him. She couldn’t want him.

Ignoring the furious blush on her cheeks, Emma shot a quick, panicked glance towards the barn door. His friend could easily meander back in to witness such a scene. She doubted the man would be too offended by it, but it would certainly make it harder for her to continue her flirtatious charade if he caught her canoodling his partner. Or even worse, she realized, her father could decide to pay an impromptu visit to the stables and stumble upon this horrid scene. Then, she would have no choice but to marry him. Then, she would lose the game entirely.

“I can pursue whoever I damn well please. You're not my father and you're certainly not my husband. So, if Mister Finnegan likes me, I don’t need your permission to reciprocate his affections."

When he spoke, she bristled, fingers curling into fists at her sides. Her eyes glowed with anger as she stared up at him. I don't think it will be difficult to prove to him just what kind of woman you are. Emma gawked, brows furrowed in disbelief.

“And, pray tell, exactly what kind of woman is that? The type that is harassed and threatened by men with no concept of the word ‘no’? Or the type that is hunted and bedeviled and, now, accosted in the safety of her own goddamn home?" She perched her hands on her hips, a spark of defiance catching alight in her chest. “Or do you merely mean to stick your nose into this because you’re upset it isn’t you I’m flirting with?"

She found it harder and harder to maintain her composure around him and Emma was infuriated by how easily he managed to pester her. Belle had told her more than once that she was lucky to be an only child, but she was beginning to realize that having the practice of an obnoxious younger brother would've helped prepare her for such a thing. Normally, she considered herself unflappable, but the presence of this heinous mam had proved that perhaps she wasn't as invincible as she thought.

“Our agreement was that you behave yourself. That very same agreement is the only thing stopping me from giving you a matching bruise on the other side of your stupid face. Either follow the rules of the game, or the deal is forfeit.”

Taking a step back, Emma tried to collect herself. She wiped the sweat of her hand off onto the bodice of her gown, flattening out the rumpled fabric. Whenevr she was around him, she felt like a child. They argued like children, teasing and tormenting one another, and--not for the first time-- she found herself wishing they were children so that a swift kick to his shin wouldn't be considered uncalled for.

"Really, Mister Bolton, do you think behaving like a child will make me want to marry you? Because as far as I can tell, Mister Finnegan is twice the man that you are! And if he got on his knees and proposed to me right now, I’d be damned well tempted to accept!”

She didn’t mean to raise her voice, didn’t even realize she was shouting until she heard the echoes of her words reverberate throughout the barn. Gritting her teeth, Emma lowered her voice and spoke in an even tone.

“I might remind you that I gave you the chance to act upon your carnal desires, but you refused. You had the chance to kiss me, touch me, ravish me, and whatever else you please, but you thought your hand far more suitable for the job, so you don’t get to choose me now that your britches have grown too tight." The words were laced with more venom than she had intended, realizing only in that moment how desperately she had wanted him to accept the offer to follow her to her boudoir.

Huffing, she began towards the door, only pausing to toss a warning over her shoulder. "I urge you to behave yourself, or I will match your immaturity. And I will do it far better than you."

[eyo-its-li]

i actually cant express how excited i am

[zepskies]

August Fic Recs

Hey, friends!

I got inspired by the awesome monthly rec posts that @winchestergirl2 and @deanwinchesterswitch put together, and decided to try this out. I might not do this every month, but we'll see! lol I now realize how much time and effort this takes, so to you guys who do this on the regular, I salute you! 🫡 😂

Note: If the author provided a summary, I'll include it. If not, and if it's untitled, I'll include the first line of the story. If it's a series and the author provided a series masterlist link in the chapter post, I'll also include it. MINORS BEWARE: a lot of this is 18+ content!

Supernatural

Dean Winchester x Reader:

@mxltifxnd0m -

Cute Glasses

Boyfriend Headcanons

@dewwinchester -

Stitches Summary: Dean texts you for help, and you drop everything for him.

@dean-winchester-is-a-warrior -

Things Learned and Unlearned | Chapter 12, Chapter 13, Chapter 14, Chapter 15 Summary: Y/N has spent her life trying to outrun her mother's reputation. When she meets the rich and successful playboy, Dean Winchester, how quickly can he get her to stop running?

Every Fucking Time Summary: You want to help Dean, but he knows you can't.

@talltalesandbedtimestories -

Just a Little Spice Summary: Dean likes to spice things up, but it would be nice if he didn’t have to put his life in danger in the process.

@luci-in-trenchcoats -

Oh, Baby Summary: When Dean is cursed on a hunt and turned into a baby, the reader has to take care of him along with Sam. Dean however, is a bit more adult than they might realize…

A Shirtless Winchester

Imagine...Breaking Dean Out of Jail

@zeppelinlvr -

"Better?" "Much" Summary: waking up next to Dean and getting ready with him.

@ohsc -

Help You

@rizlowwritessortof -

Sweet Escape - Part 1, Part 2 Summary: What happens when a friend jokingly does a spell at your birthday party to bring your cardboard standup of Dean Winchester to life?

@deans-queen -

Stolen Moments Summary: Y/N finds herself unable to resist capturing a rare, peaceful moment of Dean Winchester sleeping in a motel room. But when Dean wakes up and catches her in the act, what starts as an innocent photo op quickly turns into an intimate encounter.

Sweet Distractions Summary: Reader (Y/N) is at the bunker, working on an essay for her Child Development class. When Dean comes to check on her, his bad-boy charm quickly becomes a distraction she can’t resist, no matter how hard she tries.

@tofics -

Let There Be Light Summary: You, Dean and Sam are fighting America's monsters together. Coming from a long line of hunters, you fit right in with the Winchester boys, despite having been raised entirely different from the two. Where you were brought up with love and care, John raised Sam and Dean with rules and obedience. Seeing what Dean does for the world, you decide it's time that he gets his own share of love...

@jackles010378 -

A Sweet Treat Summary: Dean gets a little excited when Y/N makes his favourite treat.

Dean Winchester x OC:

@rizlowwritessortof -

Remember Me - Part 4

@spnbabe67 -

Girls, Girls, Girls Summary: While on a witch hunt Dean gets hit with a spell. Later at the hotel, Dean feels the effects of the spell and Tori has to help him through it.

It Takes Two Summary: Dean and Tori get roped into doing a pregnancy yoga session and he reminisces on how he found out she was pregnant. (Dean's POV)

Comfortember Day 7: Sick As A Dog Summary: When Dean wakes up sick, it's up to Tori to make him feel better again.

Comfortember 2023 Master List

The Broken Heart Trilogy Master List

Sam Winchester x Reader:

@ohsc -

Delicate

Untitled Drabble - "She wouldn't stop giggling."

The Boys

Soldier Boy x Reader:

@kaleldobrev -

Yes Ma'am (Soldier Boy x Plus-size!Reader) Summary: Macho Man Ben never thought he’d ever take orders from a woman; but now he does so with a smile (aka Ben is whipped and he doesn’t care).

After Everything Summary: You and Ben have a heart-to-heart.

@artyandink -

The Art of Heresy - Prequel, Chapter 1, Chapter 2 Summary: Modern day, 2022, and you have no clue what’s going on. You knew what you went through. You knew it was real, but why were there people trying to convince you that everything that happened to you wasn’t real. Hell, you called bullshit. But you get your chance to fight back when you get a call at your door.

Billy Butcher x Reader:

@lady-z-writes -

Untitled Drabble - "Butcher stumbles in the office. Haggard, nothing new."

Tracker

Russell Shaw x Reader:

@impala-dreamer -

Don't Mention It

@luci-in-trenchcoats -

M.I.A. Summary: When Colter Shaw calls the reader for help on a job, she thinks nothing of helping out. Only he never shows up and Colter may have just become the latest disappearance in this small town. It’s up to her and Russell to work together to find him before his case goes cold like all the others before…

Jacklesverse

Various characters portrayed by Jensen Ackles and/or crossovers:

@deanbrainrotwritings -

Jacklesverse Bingo 2023 Masterlist

@justagirlinafandomworld -

Stranded - SPN/The Boys crossover: Soldier Boy & Reader, with a mention of Dean.

@lamentationsofalonelypotato -

It's Not a Big Deal - SPN/The Boys crossover: Soldier Boy x Reader, with a side helping of Dean. Summary: Dean's in for a rude awakening when he finds out exactly what you did when you got stranded in another universe.

@artyandink -

Nature's Beauty Summary: You have stretch marks. How would the boys react to that?

Chicago Med

Will Halstead x Reader:

@deanstead -

5 Times You Held Back + 1 Time You Didn't Have To Summary: Five times you held back, and the one time you didn’t have to.

Wow, I read a lot this month! 😂 I hope you enjoy these lovely writers and their stories as much as I did. 💜

[panic-in-the-multiverse]

Charlie spring with sibling reader headcanons

Being Charlie Springs Sibling Would Include

Pairings: Charlie Spring x sibling!reader (some other characters makes an appearance)

Warnings: spoilers form season 2, mention of homophobia, mention of self harm, a bit angst?, mostly fluff

A/N In celebration of Heartsopper season two I thought why not write all the heartstopper requests I haven’t done yet, so here we go

And if you have a request with heartstopper pls send them

So whatever gender you have obviously decides what school you go to

I also believe you’d be older than Charlie, he’d definitely be the youngest

Really supportive of Charlie, even more so when he was outed and started to get bullied, if you go to the same school you’d definitely come to Charlie’s rescue and defend him (a bit harder to do if you aren’t in the same school)

Teaming up with Tori to comfort and protect your brother

if you aren’t or if you are going to the same school doesn’t matter either way you’d always comfort him at home

Knowing about his self harm, and the fact he doesn’t eat much, which you try to help with as much as you can

Comforting hugs

Movie marathon

Being friends with his friends, because they are genuinely good people and support him like you do.

When he got his crush on Nick you would tease him most days, and he would be stood blushing in his room with a smile on his face

If you’re part of lgbtq+ then he and the rest of your family would be supportive of you too

When he got together with Nick you’d be a bit protective first knowing about Ben before, but as soon as you see that Nick is a good guy the two of you become friends, and you share memories of Charlie to Nick.

Whenever Charlie goes to a party if you don’t come with him you make sure he has someone with him that will look out for him, because he doesn’t do too well in public spaces

Charlie, when I think of him I can’t stop thinking that he talks more to his siblings or friends about his problems so I imagine he’d go to you a lot of times if something was troubling him

A lot of gossip about Nick, like a lot, Charlie can’t stop talking about him

Omg imagine you were also at that dinner party with Nick’s family, you would definitely stand up for Nick, to Charlie’s surprise and which would also make him really happy <3

Pillow wars

Omg imagine when Charlie was a child and got nightmares and he would go into your room to cuddle with you, and you’d let him everytime, even to this day (my little brother does this instead of going to our parents, it’s so cute)

Just the best of siblings

I don’t know what else really, might add more if I come up with something, but for now this is it

[leikeliscomet]

Heartstopper's Aspec Representation Isn't For Me - And That's Okay (Mini Essay)

Spoilers for Series 3!

So I just finished series 3 and I feel conflicted. I don't hate Heartstopper at all. I think it's a very cute show. I'm happy queer baby gen z and gen alpha have something to see themselves in, I love how Tara, a darkskin Black lesbian girl is happy in her relationship. I'm happy Isaac makes my fellow aspecs happy. I'm happy Charlie tore Ben's singlet in series 2 and for once the victim/survivor is allowed to not forgive their assaulter. I like Heartstopper's little moments but I've felt like something was missing overall and now we're on the third season, I think I know what it is now. There's comments on BL and yaoi by Alice Oseman I don't fully agree with, some of the acting in the show could be a bit better I guess, most of the characters are comfortably in the British middle class and I am a grown adult now so my interest in school/teen dramas has dipped a little bit (but not you Waterloo Road ily <3). So to an extent, there were always gonna be limits on how much I enjoy this show, but nevertheless, I still think they're worth pointing out, especially if we're claiming Heartstopper for the next gen of queer rep. Because honestly having watched shows like Heartbreak High and Koisenu Futari plus being a massive Selah and the Spades fan, I feel a bit robbed in terms of quality.

Isaac still feels underdeveloped and for a show that's been going on for 3 series now this feels disappointing. Like obviously Nick and Charlie get all the screentime as they're the main characters. Tao and Elle got a lot more juicer storylines from s2, Tara and Darcy got more to work with this series even if it was rushed (oh I miss you long series 2010s shows), but Isaac still feels leaps behind everyone else. He didn't really get anything in series 1. In series 2 we saw him coming to terms with his identity which felt like a good starting point but I was still waiting for the 'big asexual plans' Alice Oseman promised and... nothing. I liked his comment about googling aromanticism to Charlie because the representation by PowerPoint style of aspec writing can get tired. I also liked his moment of feeling left out by his friends plus still wanting to know Nick and Charlie's tea, giving him sexual agency whilst aroace instead of feeding into infantilisation. But apart from that... nothing. I wanted to feel more moved by the aquarium scene, but it felt tacked on because whilst Isaac's upset was justified, Imogen just wanted to chat about gay fish, so Isaac came across as a little passive-aggressive instead of what was supposed to be his moment. Plus it feels a little backhanded how much effort series 1 went to in how big coming to terms with your identity is, plus the gorgeous way Isaac's aroace revelation was filmed in series 2 was filmed just to have him blurt it out in an aquarium and have barely any of his friends actually support him like he supported them. But life imitates art I guess. This whole season we've seen characters talking about university plans, gap years and going through the post-16 struggle. But what about Isaac? We never find out what uni he wants to go to or even if he wants to go. What subjects does he like? What job does he want post-school? What's his relationship like with his family? The people need to know! I always found it weird how Isaac was left out to the point where straight characters, whilst still bearing in mind that Tao x Elle is an interracial pairing between two POC and one of which is a trans girl and this is very rare and deserved representation too, had gotten more screentime than him. Imogen, Sahar, Mr Ajayi and Mr Farouk had all been introduced for bigger storylines but Isaac, despite being in the main group, still had to wait for his share. This series was such a huge moment for everyone but Isaac... again. And whilst I'm happy if everyone else is, I genuinely feel like we all deserve better.

Tori was given bigger moments this series and that was great because I was waiting for my introverted slurping sister to come through. Her concern and care for Charlie and jealousy of Nick were great plus with the introduction of Michael, it was all leading to the big reveal of Tori being ace, right? Right? Wrong, because this scene was cut from the ferris wheel moment and I have no idea why. Oseman confirmed it was because Tori's storyline will continue in s4 and she didn't want to rush it but like, what? Series 3, at least in my eyes, did an alright job at building up her coming out. And again, if Nick could get his bi awakening in a one series arc, why can't this asexual character then too? They also covered Darcy's non-binary transition and coming out in this series too so I don't know why there wasn't room for Tori apparently. There was plenty of room for an 'I'm asexual' within those 5 minutes. Waiting to develop her in series 4, which is yet to be confirmed and likely to be the show's last series so it will already have a lot to do with wrapping up the Nick x Charlie saga seems like a poor decision. This is the second time we've had to wait till next season for the aspec character's arc by the way.

I'd like to see some aroallo POVs on this but this season put a lot of emphasis on linking love and sex together and it felt a bit strange icl. Yes, they're linked socially/societally and it's great to have sex with someone you love and love someone you have sex with etc etc etc but the first 2 series made a point of separating the two by showing love without sex and how it was just as meaningful. Almost every time a character was sexually attracted to another e.g. calling them hot or started making out because they wanted to have sex in that given moment there would be a dialogue from one of them going 'it's okay we're in love 'it's normal you're in love' 'well that's what people in love do!' and these are all correct statements but like... we get it! You don't have to be head over heels in love to find someone sexually attractive or just want to have sex with them. It's okay if you're not in love too y'know? I'm not sure what that constant reassurance was for because depicting sex without love isn't as pearl clutchy as it seems when all parties are safe, consenting and comfortable, or, if you've ever had any knowledge about aro(allo) spaces tbf. Nick and Charlie are not aspec and are very much sexually attracted to each other so the conclusion of them having sex isn't surprising at all, especially when I already knew from tweets back in series 1 that Heartstopper the comic already had a storyline later on of the two having sex for the first time. Plus the other characters aren't aspec either so their sexual debuts are also unsurprising and deserved. Plus, I'm actually glad they included Tara and Darcy having sex because many 'sex positive' shows seem to leave out the lesbians. But for a show with an aroace creator and aspec characters, the depictions of romance and sex don't feel like they were written from an aspec lense or for an aspec audience. It's normal for people to be romantically and sexually attracted to each other and then date and have sex. But if you're aspec, you know this. We all know this. This is the mainstream and default depiction of human (hetero)sexuality. We're watching the queer shows to see something different from that. When romance without sex can only hinge on the characters being below the age of consent plus a supposed 'innocence' due to their young age and sex without love is non existent, plus when you factor in how there are no aroallo or alloace characters in the show with 'groundbreaking' aspec representation, it makes for a bit of a headscratcher. Heartstopper may be made by an aspec, has aspec characters and aspec fans, I don't consider it an aspec show. Bit sad, but it is what it is.

It's honestly strange how despite this fact, asexuality and aromanticism is barely mentioned in the main discourse about this show. Antis claim Oseman is a cishet woman despite being non-binary and aroace. They blame the sexlessness of the show on puritanism despite Oseman being aroace. There's constant arguments about how 'unrealistic' it is for teenagers to not have sex despite Isaac being a whole teenage aroace and how some people just didn't have sex in their teens... like aspecs. People are annoyed the show keeps giving Isaac aromantic and asexual storylines because it's 'not as important' and they 'don't care' as if he's not a main cast member and again, the creator is aroace! If you look at the promo pictures of the show, it has the main three pairings, Nick and Charlie, Tao and Elle and Tara and Darcy and no Isaac. Despite the fact it's supposed to be 'for' us and made by one of us, it's not. And a lot of non aspec queer fans watching the show don't see it for us despite being made by one of us either. And that's a real shame.

I'm fully aware Oseman knows about writing aroace characters from the book Loveless, which has an aroace MC. But I think Netflix choosing to adapt Heartstopper over Loveless was intentional. I think Netflix creating Isaac instead of Aled, a demi gay non-binary character from the og comic, was intentional. I think all the decisions Netlix made with Isaac and Tori are intentional, the same way bringing Yasmin Benoit to the Sex Education writers room to cut half of O's storylines was intentional. Netflix has fumbled the bag with asexual and aromantic representation several times now (Cash Piggot and Todd notwithstanding) so at this point, I'm not surprised anymore. Again, I'm happy for anyone who really likes Heartstopper, but I've finally accepted that it's not for me. And that's okay. When someone makes the predominantly aspec, slightly more grown, queer show with fully fleshed out arcs for its's asexual and/or aromantic characters or hits up Lovie Simone for the scrapped Selah and the Spades TV show, I know where I'll be.

We deserved our moments too. We deserve our Heartstopper.

[emycantconsentrate]

solitaire Ranttttt

I love this book and I've read it at least 30 times. i just want to say before I start that these are my personal opinions about the book.

I know i said I've read it a lot but i still don't know everything so please don't get mad if i get any facts incorrect.

Solitaire starts as Victoria (tori) Spring is starting school after x-mas or winter break. Tori lives with her mom, dad, and two brothers, Charlie and Oliver. Charlie, who is also in the heartstopper comics, struggles with an ED. I truly think that this effects Tori's life a lot. I know its not Charlies fault but I'm sure tori is almost constantly worrying about him. Tori and her mother don't get along very well. I'm not entirely sure why they don't but i think they touch more on that fact in This Winter. I've read it but it was a long time ago and i really need a reread.

on a different note. I've been needed to talk about this but none of my friends care enough. This is a controversial opinion but i hate Becky. she is such a bitch to tori and i just can't stand her. i know most of the time when tori and her would fight it would be when Becky is drunk but that doesn't make anything she has done right. she dated Ben Hope, one of the worst people in the universe of solitaire. i guess i don't really have a true reason to hate her accept for the fact that i have had friends like Becky. its all fine and its a beautiful friendship, then out of nowhere they go behind you and become friends or start dating someone that isn't a good person. they don't know they are a bad person and you do. and if you try to tell them that they are a bad person they either don't care or they don't believe you. I truly don't get why people like Becky. this is way too much but I'm going to do it any way. I'm going to analyze one of their fights.

pages 226-228 Solitaire

Becky was kissing Ben Hope after 100% knowing how awful of a person he was and still is to her best friends little brother. Tori sees this happening at the Solitaire party and is furious. which is completely reasonable because of how actually nasty he is.

after ben walks off Becky asks tori what she's looking at. in the next bit tori just goes off on her saying stuff like "you are a nasty bitch," and "you just don't care, do you?"

"that's it isn't it? I'm you naive little friend whose sad little life makes you feel better about yourself. well, you're absolutely spot-on there. I haven't got a single clue about anything. But you know what i do know? I know when someone is being a nasty bitch. Go ahead and cry your little crocodile tears if you want to. You don't fucking care at all do you?" this is a rant Tori goes on while arguing. This leaves Becky absolutely speechless.

"well- you- you're the one being a nasty bitch! Jesus Christ just calm down." After Becky says this Tori tells the reader that, i quote, "this is bad. I need to stop. I can't" Tori is now aware that she can't help was she says anymore. She no longer trust Becky. She no longer has a "BFF". Becky has betrayed her.

Tori continues to yell at Becky. "I'm sorry - do you have any comprehension of the level of betrayal you have just reached? Do you have any concept of friendship? I didn't think it was possible for someone to be that selfish, but clearly i've been wrong all this time" Tori is very very upset now and then says " You've killed me. You've literally killed me."

Becky has single handedly DESTORYED Tori. Becky is awful, and of course she just tells her to calm down. she literally was just making out with a boy that SA'd HER BEST FRIENDS BROTHER! and she knew he did it. which is ACTUALLY INSANE!!!!!

just the amount of betrayal and shit she caused makes be fucking sick to my stomach. yeah i do know that its a fake story and they aren't real people. it's just the fact that people like Becky do really do shit like this. I can't believe people are actually capable of stuff like this.

i really need to shut up but i have two more quotes from Tori then I'll stop.

"You have solidly proven that everyone and everything is shit. well done. Gold star. please delete yourself from my life."

" i am gone. I am gone. I guess everyone is like this. Smiles, hugs, years together, holidays, late night confessions, tears, phone calls, one million words - they don't mean anything. Becky doesn't care. No one really cares."

thank you for listening/reading