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theradicalscrivener · 10 months ago

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The Adventures of Leit: Sissel

A sequel to Yahahaa~!

Now nearly completely immobilized by the "gift" of a playful nature spirit, Leit sets out to broker a new deal with the deity. The first rule of dealing with trickster gods is to remember that they are by definition... tricksters.

(P.S. Ya boi's got Linktree and Bluesky now)

[Previous Chapter]

Leit gripped the reins of the oxen he had rented and struggled against his own exhaustion. He had ridden through the night to get to his destination, and despite his fatigue, he dared not stop. It wasn’t just that he was in a hurry to find the nature spirit that had “blessed” him before. He was worried that any action he attempted other than driving would be rewarded by the nature sprites that harried him at every turn. The sprites were nothing if not overzealous in their gift-giving. Even just tying his shoes had warranted fanfare and a reward, and each “reward” added more mass to his already impossibly huge package.

When Leit had reached the inn the night before, he had thought he would have a little time to rest and recover, but he quickly realized that was not to be. Even just the act of entering the tavern had summoned the spirits. He suddenly found himself immobilized on a massive set of cock and balls that dwarfed his whole body! It had taken twenty other patrons to get him out of the tavern.

Someone had had the bright idea to use a bunch of old, hardened baguettes to set up a roller belt to slide him across the tavern towards the back entrance. The extra wide doors were primarily used for unloading barrels and bags of flour and rice for the kitchen. However, the loading dock was only barely wide enough to get Leit’s massive nuts through them. Each of his massive stones was far larger than the whiskey and ale barrels that normally passed through. His nuts were so massive that they rivaled the size of wild boars, and his cock was easily as long as the bar counter but far wider!

As soon as the crew got him through the doorway, the tell-tale sound of popping and cheering preceded the arrival of yet another nature spirit. “Yahahaa~!” it had cheered as Leit’s cock and balls grew even larger. Let watched in horror as his cock and balls grew and grew, but even as he fixated on his own package, his gaze drifted towards the pronounced bulges in the pants of the other tavern goers. They had shared in his rewards as well. With each successful “challenge” they too saw pronounced growth below the belt.

The crew had managed to shove him off the loading platform and onto a cart. Another poof. Another cheer. Another surge of growth.

The wooden cart creaked beneath him. The spokes cracked. The axels splintered. The cart shattered under the sheer weight of Leit’s swelling package.

The crew redoubled their efforts. Using the now wheel-less wreckage of the cart, they managed to pull Leit and his package through the mud like a dog sled through the snow until he reached the docks.

Another poof. Another cheer. Another round of growth for everyone involved. Now, even Leit’s saviors were looking indecent. Many were clad in loose, ragged, peasant attire which barely contained their swollen cock and balls. The sheer weight of their packages on the crotch of their loose pants caused the waistbands to dip well past their hip and halfway down their thighs. Their cocks were so thick that they rivaled their throats for sheer girth, and their balls were the size of pumpkins! Yet they persisted.

Leit ponied up the funds to rent one of the larger merchant carts – one that would hopefully hold his weight and then some. He needed to be sure that he didn’t outgrow this cart somewhere in the countryside far from the aid of others.

The team got him loaded onto the cart using a nearby crane. Another poof. Another cheer. Another surge.

The tavernkeeper’s clothes had been nicer than many of the other people who had stepped up to help. His tight slacks had long since torn away. Now his cock was so huge that the head of it scraped the dirt even after draping over his massive, beer barrel sized nuts.

The team gathered enough oxen to pull the cart, handed Leit the reins, and sent him on his way. Another poof. Another cheer. Another surge. As Leit was pulling away from the town, he glanced over his shoulder at his saviors. Every last one of them had long since outgrown their pants. Nuts scraped the dirt. Cocks draped over their nuts and splayed out for a foot or two in front of them. Even the smallest of the bunch had a cock that rivaled their waist for sheer size. Leit just hoped that once he got out of range, they would be spared further “rewards”.

He had ridden for hours since then. The sun had long since set and risen once more. Evert turn in the path, every fork in the road, he worried that his choices would warrant a prize. He dared not stop. He dared not sleep. All he could do was focus on traveling farther in hopes of reaching his goal before he outgrew his vehicle.

His oxen were exhausted as he turned down the dirt path through the forest. The cart, even reinforced to handle oversized load, groaned perilously beneath his weight. His nuts were so huge that either massive boulder was the size of a covered wagon. His soft cock snaked in front of him like a sea serpent. It was thicker than the mightiest oak and as tall as a pine tree. Some part of his mind noted the size of his cock compared to that of the tree trunks that filled the old growth forest that he wandered through, but he quickly shoved the thought from his mind. The last thing he wanted was to let the spirits think he actually enjoyed his new size… even if on some level, he secretly did.

Orgasms felt amazing. With each surge in size, his climaxes had become more amazing, more intense, more blissful, more intoxicating! He could feel himself getting addicted to the sensation, and some part of him craved the next release. The dark thoughts gnawing at the back of his mind worked their way into his cock, causing the thick trunk of his cock to stir to life. Soon, his rod jutted out in front of him further than even his ox team.

As he made his way deeper and deeper into the forest, Leit fought a losing battle against himself. He was getting hornier by the moment! At first, he tried to chalk it up to how sensitive his massive cock and balls were. The steady rumbling of the cart was like a deep-tissue massage for him caravan-sized sack, but as he made his way deeper into the forest, his mind was flooded with thoughts of growing and cumming and cumming and growing. Sure, he was a horny guy, but the sane part of his brain resisted with all its might. He was horny, but he was not this horny! Something else must be affecting him, and Leit had a pretty good idea what – or who – that something might be.

“I know you’re there, Sissel,” Leit called out.

“Perceptive, are we?” Came a voice from the forest. “Perhaps, I should reward you?”

A chuckle reverberated through the trees. Leit could once again feel the pressure growing in his already supersized sack and schlong. His cart was already straining under the wait of his massive package, and he could tell he had another growth spurt coming.

“T-this is what I wanted to talk to you about,” Leit struggled to speak. With every syllable he uttered he had to fight back the urge to moan. The growth felt so fantastic. Part of him craved more. Part of him wanted to get bigger and bigger, but he had to keep that part of him in check. If he succumbed, he’d soon be trapped on a package far too massive for even his cart to handle. He’d be stranded in the middle of nowhere on a set of cock and balls that would dwarf a yeti.

�� “And what was it you wanted to say?” The voice replied. The voice seemed to be coming from every direction at once. It was as if the speaker had him surrounded on all sides. It was as if the words themselves came from every tree in the forest.

“These gifts… I appreciate the gesture, but I can’t move at this size!” Leit protested.

“You seem to get around just fine to me?” Sissel replied playfully.

“You know what I mean! I can’t continue my adventure like this! I don’t mean to sound ungrateful, but is there any way we can discuss a different reward for my services?” Leit asked.

“Hmm… A different reward? I may have something in mind… I actually was going to suggest it sooner or later, but you took the initiative and sought me out.” Sissel replied cryptically.

Leit wasn’t about to take Sissel’s offer at face value, especially when the tricky nature spirit hadn’t even said what it was yet, but anything was better than being trapped atop his own immense schlong… right?

“I’m listening…” Leit replied skeptically.

“Well. You’re carrying around so much of my little blessing, wouldn’t you say?” Sissel teased.

Leit’s eye twitched slightly, but he didn’t reply. He merely waited to hear what Sissel had in mind.

“Don’t be so dour. Think about it as a sort of… Oh, I don’t know. A fundraiser? You collect points, and you can turn those in to me for some fun prizes!” Sissel said. There was a strange sort of manic glee to his voice that made Leit more than a little uncomfortable. Sissel was one of the “good” lesser deities, but gods had a different definition of good and evil than people did.

“And what are these points, you speak of?” Leit asked.

“Isn’t it obvious? You’re sitting on it right now?” Sissel replied with a giggle.

Leit glanced down at his enormous package. Was Sissel really implying that he was willing to trade the mass Leit had accumulated for something else?

“And what kind of ‘prizes’ are you offering?” Leit asked. He was skeptical to say the least, but he was already treading dangerous ground by asking for a god to rethink his boon.

“Oh. The usual things you adventuresome types crave. Would you like to be a little stronger? A little taller? A little smarter? Mortal bodies are so easy to shape, as I’m sure you’ve noticed,” Sissel said with a cackle.

“So, I give up the size that you’ve granted me, and I get a… for lack of a better word… an upgrade to some other part?” Leit asked.

“Of course, but I’ll tell you now, I don’t have time for hashing out the minutiae. Well, ok. You got me. I’ve got plenty of time. I just don’t want to. So, I’ll tell you what. I’ll take all the size you have gained so far, and give you a boon to match,” Sissel explained.

Leit was running the numbers in his head. He could boost one of his attributes? All it would cost was the unwieldy mass of cock and balls that he was currently trapped atop? This seemed too good to be true, which meant it probably was.

“What’s the catch?” Leit asked.

“Catch? What’s the catch!? Oh, you wound me so…” Sissel replied. His voice dripping with mock indignation.

“I don’t mean to be ungrateful. I feel like you were a little too generous with your gifts before, and I want to be sure that this trade is fair for you,” Leit replied.

“Hmm… maybe you are right. I was a bit liberal with my gift, wasn’t I?” Sissel mused.

“Right. I appreciate the gesture, but I’d like to make sure we approach the table as equals if we’re going to negotiate,” Leit said.

“Oh, alright. I suppose that’s allowed,” Sissel replied. “Right then. Full disclosure. You give me all the size you’ve gained in your mortal dangly bits, and I’ll grant you a boon of strength befitting what you have given up. Once that’s done, I’ll send you merrily on your way to do more good deeds and gain more ‘points’. Then once you’ve saved up enough, come find me again, and we can do the trade again. Rinse and repeat as nauseum ipso facto lorem ipsum yadda yadda whaddya say?”

Leit was already trying to think one step ahead. Sissel wouldn’t lie, but he wouldn’t necessarily tell the truth. The trouble with a trickster god was that they tended to be tricksters. Yet, Leit couldn’t see anything necessarily wrong with what Sissel was saying. Leit picks a reward, his dick goes back to how it was before all this began plus. Then he’s free to earn more size which can later be traded in for more buffs? It sounded like a great deal, and if Sissel was going to continue to grant Leit size with each puzzle he solved, he’d soon once again be too encumbered to move. Which meant that Leit knew exactly what his first request would be.

“Alright. I think that’s agreeable,” Leit replied.

“Ooooh goody. I was hoping you’d say that,” Sissel said excitedly. His voice sounded honest enough, but his voice always had that impish glee to it that made it impossible to trust anything he said.

“So, I can pick one… I guess attribute? Let me carry more without being weighed down. I would like to be stronger,” Leit said.

“Easy enough,” Sissel replied. Leit still couldn’t see the spirit, but he could hear a sound like the snapping of fingers.

Leit suddenly felt his body surging with energy. He looked down and noticed that he was glowing! Leit was already pants-less, but the energy coursing through him quickly burned away his shirt and cloak leaving him completely nude atop his own immense balls. His already dense, defined muscles seemed to tighten. They weren’t getting much bigger, but his whole body felt denser and stronger.

“Huh…” Leit mused out loud as he flexed his pecs. With each passing second, his muscles grew denser and more defined. He used to have a strong, flat midsection, but he could now see his mostly flat belly tensing into a well defined 8-pack set of abs. His biceps were bulging so much that he looked like he was flexing even though he was completely relaxed.

“What? Did you want them to get bigger too? I thought we both agreed that you didn’t want to be weighed down,” Sissel teased.

“No. This is great, actually. I won’t even need to get a new wardrobe!” Leit replied. Although, even as he said it, he knew that wasn’t true. He traveled light, and his main outfit had been thoroughly obliterated.

Leit was so fixated on his muscles that he didn’t notice the mass draining from his package at first. His dick was rapidly dwindling. It had once been so huge that he could sit atop his schlong sidesaddle and not even have his feet touch the ground, but now it was only barely thicker than his dense, muscular midriff. The shaft was barely longer than he was tall, and his nuts had gone from the size of the large massive ale kegs they kept in the basement of taverns to a much more manageable pumpkin size.

Leit already felt so powerful, that he was half tempted to ask for Sissel to stop right then and there, but Leit knew that if he called for this to stop too soon, Sissel might get offended, and it was better to abide by their agreement than try to make any changes this late in the game. After all, it had been so easy to gain all this mass, Leit had no reason to doubt it would take him long to get back to the same predicament he had been in mere moments before.

Leit’s cock and balls continued to dwindle down to more manageable sizes. Soon his schlong was shorter than his arm and as thick as his now very defined quads. His nuts were now closer in size to watermelons than prized pumpkins. Again, Leit thought about asking Sissel to stop, but thought better of it.

Leit’s cock and balls continued to get smaller and smaller. Soon it was only as long as his forearm and thick as his wrist. His impressive pecker was topped off with a pair of grapefruit sized stones. An enormous rod by most people’s standards, but Leit was starting to have second thoughts…

Yet Leit could do nothing but stare as his dick got smaller and smaller. Soon it was barely longer than his middle finger. He was approaching his old size in a hurry, but his now perfectly average softy was still shrinking.

“H-hey, Sissel…?” Leit asked nervously.

“Don’t tell me you’re having second thoughts,” Sissel said impishly.

“It’s already smaller than I started!” Leit protested.

It was true, his dick was now shorter than his pinky and a hair thinner than his thumb. His nuts had shrunken down below the size of peach pits and were now closer to the size of cherries!

“I already told you, I would reduce it down to the size you started with,” Sissel explained.

“But it’s already too small!” Leit protested.

“But you were much smaller before,” Sissel explained with a devilish cackle.

The realization hit him like a ton of bricks. Sissel never said he would reduce Leit’s dick down to the size it had been before Leit had firs encountered the spirit. Sissel had said he would reduce Leit’s dick down to the size “he had started with”, and in this case that meant the size that Leit had born with!

Leit stared in shock as his already puny pecker dwindled and dwindled. His dick was now shorter than his thumb and thinner than his pinky. His nuts had gone from the size of cherries to the size of cherry pits, and still it was shrinking!

Down and down it went. His dick was so short that he could measure his dick against the knuckles of his pinky instead of the digit itself. His rod didn’t even reach the first knuckle. It was as skinny as the stem of a dandelion. His nuts were now so small that the entire tightly packed pouch was now the size of a macadamia nut.

“There. That’s a good look on you,” Sissel said with a cackle.

Suddenly a gust of wind surrounded Leit. He raised his arms to cover his face as leaves and twigs blasted around him in all directions. Sissel’s laughter seemed to get farther and farther away as Leit was buffeted.

“Sissel! What are you doing!? Get back here!” Leit shouted.

“Why should I? I’m fulfilling our arrangement. Didn’t I tell you? I’d shrink it down and send you on your way? Think of it as a head start on all those good deeds you have to do,” Sissel voice echoed playfully in Leit’s mind.

“Sissel! Get back here!” Leit shouted.

“Get back here? But I never left?” Sissel words echoed in Leit’s mind.

“What? But?” Leit sputtered.

The winds had stopped. The raging torrent had been replaced by other noises. Noises that Leit would rather not hear right now. Leit could hear mutters and gasps all around him. He lowered his arms and realized that he was now standing dead center in a crowded market. Sissel had sent Leit back to the main hub of the continent… sans equipment… sans clothes… sans dick.

Leit was too stunned to cover himself. His newly empowered muscles and his newly miniaturized cock openly on display as the people in the market stopped to gawk at the fully grown man with an infant sized dicklet who was fully nude in the middle of the market.

“Sissel!” Leit yelled in a harsh whisper.

“Oh, don’t be so dour. I already told you you can earn it back by doing more deeds,” Sissel’s voice chided.

“Yeah. Ok. I gave the town a good show. That’s got to be worth a little, right?” Leit hissed.

“Oh, that would have been worth a bit back in the day, but weren’t you the one to say I was a bit too generous with my gift? You’ll have to try much harder to impress me…” Sissel said. His voice fading away into nothingness as he finished his parting barb.

“Sissel!” Leit hissed, but his cry was met with only the sound of murmurs from the crowd who were now engrossed in the sight of the man who still hadn’t bothered to cover up.

“Sissel…?” Leit pleaded, but again there was no response from the spirit.

With his attention no longer fixated on the nature spirit, the reality of his situation slowly dawned on him. Leit glanced around at the crowd of onlookers. His face burned beet red, and his micro-dick twitched from all the attention. As Leit glanced around, he realized that he hadn’t just been dropped in the center of the market. He had been dropped at the doorstep of the adventurer guild where he had gotten his start. Leit now stood there unarmed and unhung before his friends and former colleagues. Leit noticed the looks on their faces and the gestures they were making. He reached down and covered his dick. His package was now so small that he didn’t even need both hands. He didn’t even need one. He could cover his package with just the tip of his thumb.

[Previous Chapter]

#cock growth #hyper #large penis #small penis #cock shrinking #story tag #cock shrinkage (search tag)#small penis (search tag)

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dresshistorynerd · 1 year ago

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Hello!! Your blog has been a delight to browse through. I have a question, it may seem obvious but I'm just making sure- with codpieces, did the "cods" actually go inside the little pouch, or did the codpieces sort of just go over where they were located and people's "cods" were tucked back somewhere else? I assume the former, but the construction of some of the ones I've seen in portraits (very upturned) looks like it'd be uncomfortable.

Semi-related question, I've got a couple of characters that, for one reason or another, wear codpieces without being in possession of a "cod". Would that influence how it would lay on the body in any way? Would it be wildly inaccurate to suggest theirs were stuffed with cotton or something?

Again, your blog is very cool and I appreciate finding another historical clothing enjoyer :]

Thank you! :) It makes me happy to hear you've enjoyed this blog!

I'm not sure if you've already seen my post about the construction of the joined hose in which I also touch on the origins of the codpiece. Shortly the early cod pieces in late 15th century were invented to cover the genital area comfortably, when the hose were relatively stiff and very skintight.

Looking at the early codpieces, which were basically just a small piece of fabric tied on on the crotch it does make a lot of sense, clearly the it held the genitals inside it. Like in this 1470s painting.

The men's fashion where they didn't wear hems and only very tight hose was mainly used by young fashionable men, who were not nobles, so soldiers, musicians, Venetian gondoliers etc. At the time valuables were generally tied to the belt in pouches, and especially when it comes to soldiers, who would also have knives and swords hanging on their hips, not having a protective layer of a skirt left their genitals quite vulnerable to hanging objects. Which is probably why they started padding their codpieces. The codpiece started to be made from two pieces of fabric making it more shapely and less flat, but it wasn't yet very extreme. There is padding but it's still easy to see how it would hold the genitals.

In 16th century it very quickly though turned very extreme. It became huge, what the French called appropriately a baguette. It was heavily padded, even boned to keep the shape.

There's not much if any codpieces left from the time, so it's hard to say how they were specifically constructed. To me it seems quite probable, that they were still functionally the same as the earlier codpieces with a little pouch for the genitals and the rest being padding. There's a pretty interesting theory though about these extreme codpieces. At the time there was a big syphilis epidemic in Europe and they put all kinds of herbs and remedies on the genitals and wrapped the penis in bandages with the remedies. So the theory suggests that these baguettes may have been developed to hold and protect bandaged genitals, protect the fashion fabrics from the staining remedies and also obscure that someone had the very stigmatized infection by making a very padded penis a fashion. There's a really interesting paper about it, which also goes into detail about the codpiece.

So the genitals were held inside the codpiece one way or another. And to answer the other question, padding the codpieces was already standard practice so padding it a little bit more if one didn't have outward genitals like that is very believable to me. In fact, people would even hide some valuables inside their very large and padded codpieces. Even in the earliest codpieces made from flat fabric you could easily add a little extra stuffing to the under-breeches or the chemise tucked in to the hose. Though I'd doubt they'd use cotton as padding, since cotton wasn't readily available at the time in Europe. (It was all imported from Asia, since it didn't grow in Europe and Europeans didn't know how to weave cotton, so it was used on very specific purposes, like lining doublets.) More likely wool, linen or horsehair.

#cw: genitals mentioned #answers #historical fashion #dress history #fashion history #men's historical fashion #renaissance fashion #medieval fashion

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bucketspammer4life · 1 year ago

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punch out but theres a 3rd title defense

HEAVILY INSPIRED BY @matchamabs's punch out title defense 2 posts!! go check their account out!!

Glass Joe - He gets a baguette and beats the living shit out of you with it, if you somehow attack him while he prepares to hit you with it you get a star + his baguette breaks and he has 2 baguettes to beat you with now

Von Kaiser - He gets another haircut and also turns into a cyborg, if you punch his face enough you can reveal the robotic parts of his face, through his cutscenes he malfunctions a lot more

Disco Kid - He wears 80's fitness gear and becomes faster and dances nonstop, also he has headphones in all the time

King Hippo - He has 3 belts to hold up his new jorts and the little tape on his stomach is now covered in duct tape, the belts are still ridiculously loose and can still be knocked off because he hasnt been pantsed enough already

Piston Hondo - He has a entire ass mech that looks like him, if you do a 3 star punch you can break his mech and have it eject him, you gotta dodge the falling mech or you just get knocked out

bear hugger - He tapes an entire maple tree to him and drinks the maple syrup during the fight that has birds & squirrels in it, similiar to normal title defense king hippo: if you knock off the tree from him he becomes a Disney princess and makes the animals attack you

great tiger - He has a genie lamp and fights you with said genie in it, if you punch the genie enough it goes back into its lamp and tiger gets mad at it

don flamenco - He uses his "perfume" (POISONNN!!!) to attack you, if he sprays you with it Mac gets tired for a few seconds, if you can punch it away from his hands he gathers up the pieces and rubs it on his gloves

aran ryan - He gets a brick tied to a rope and is out for blood, if you can somehow punch the brick it bounces back at him and knocks him out

soda popinski - He has one of those hats where you can store drinks in it and sip from it and he has scientists refilling it almost every second, you can jab them to get them off of his back to stop him from getting stronger

bald bull - He befriends the bull from don flamenco's cutscenes and the bull that charged at him during his td cutscene and attacks you with them, if you knock out any of them he gets more involved in the ring and charges at you more

super macho man - He wears 2 sunglasses during the fight & his roots are showing, if you knock of one of those sunglasses he laughs at you because theres another one on it

mr sandman - He gets a tank, an entire ass tank and proceeds to go crazy with it

#alternative title: everyone is fucked #punch out #headcanon #punch out wii #punch out headcanons #bald bull #don flamenco #piston hondo #aran ryan #glass joe #great tiger #GO FOLLOW @MATCHAMABS OR I'LL STEAL YOUR FRIDGE!!!#theyre super awesome and so is their art #this is so nonsensical #i love it!!#also i imagine bulls cutscene as him befriending the bulls and just wrecking don flamenco while hes at it #and Joe's as robbing a bakery #AND Kaisers as him just going to the hairdresser as a cyborg after surgery #AND AND AND piston hondo's as him staying up for ages to build a mech #AND AND AND AND AND!! Sandman as sneaking into a military base and stealing a tank #AND AND AND AND AND AND AND AND AND AND AND AND AND!!!! Disco kid as watching 80's workout stuff #AND AND AND AND AND AND AND AND AND AND AND AND AND AND AND AND AND AND AND AND AND AND AND Don flamenco brewing up some truly evil poison #AND-#(gets shot and fucking dies)#AND ARAN RYAN STEALING A BRICK FROM A CONSTRUCTİON SİTE #ok enough screaming BYEEE #no i lied actually #AND GREAT TIGER INDIANA JONES'ING THE LAMP!!!#AND BEAR HUGGER STEALING A TREE!!

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da-birb-writes-sometimes · 1 year ago

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Hello bonjour!

I've been thinking something recently...

As a fellow Canadian (hey!) with some, uh, less than magnifique French language skills, I was wondering how you think our dear francophone Rook Hunt would behave around someone with "cereal box French" (that is, able to understand it, but cannot speak it)?

Would he speak the same amount of the language around you? Even more French? Would he offer to teach the language?

I'm curious as to what you think! :)

Bonjour! I too only have "cereal box French" about the same literacy as a third-grader. even though I have 8 years of classes under my belt, but that's the education system for ya. And also, yes, a fellow Canadian; always a pleasant surprise! But here are my thoughts!

Some of the French is what I remember plus a bit of Word Reference, and much to the dismay of every French teacher that I ever had, Google Translate to fill in the gaps.

Rook Hunt with a Reader Who Has "Cereal Box" French

Okay, so he would notice that, unlike the others, you seemed like you were following along with what he was saying. "Tu parles français, trickster?" He would ask, resting his chin on his hand, waiting for an answer.

"Un petit peu," you answered. "Honestly though, I can only read it. Speaking it? Well, it isn't great. I call it 'cereal box' French."

He would smile, "Well, reading is a start. And, if you want trickster, I could teach you."

If You Accept His Offer

He would be an amazing teacher and would go at your preferred pace. Having difficulty with that one phrase? He's patient and will help you. "Très bien! Bien travail, trickster! For that one word, I would recommend rolling the 'r' a bit more."

He would ask you if you wanted to improve your accent while speaking it, so it isn't a "baguette accent" as some would put it.

It would start small, such as asking, "Comment ça va?" and seeing how long you would be able to keep the conversation going. He would be proud if you just gave him a, "Ça va bien" or proceeded to say a bit more.

Would pass you notes just in français. "Lisez ceci plus tard, mon chou.~" You can decide whether or not you want to bring up him calling you his cabbage.

His use of French would increase as your skill does. Even though it may be fun that you understand what he's saying, he would much rather speak with you. It would be a nice change of pace since no one that he knows, outside of his own family of course, speaks the language. No, Rollo does not count.

Learning through cooking would also occur. Since you did, after all, call it 'cereal box' French. "Passe l'oeuf s'il te plait, trickster. Merci beaucoup!~"

If You Deny His Offer

He would still speak the same amount of French, but he won't push to teach you if you didn't want to. Maybe just a tad more, but not by much.

He would probably be a tad bit disappointed, but wouldn't show it. At least you know some of what he's saying, and that in itself is enough for him.

Would surprise you with some family recipes that were left in his care by his arrière grand-mère, seeing if you can understand the words by yourself before helping out if you have any difficulties.

Overall, I see Rook as being pleasantly surprised but also happy, regardless or not if the reader takes him up on his offer to teach them. But very relaxed on the subject, not pushing them if they didn't want to learn. Taking it at your own pace with a gentle hand. Also, you two would probably watch French soap operas and films, just saying.

And I'm so sorry if you, much like I did, had to sit through French class watching Téléfrançais. Also, I do love the Québécois Rook headcanon, but I do know it's very niche.

I hope that you enjoyed the little headcanons. Rook, please hold French classes for those of us who want to learn.

#twst #twisted wonderland #rook hunt #twst rook #rook hunt x reader #[I guess; but it works for platonic. familial. or romantic]#twst headcanons #rook hunt headcanons #I am so sorry if you had to endure Ananas #the pineapple still gives me nightmares over a decade later #rook please teach us french; I am begging you #also glad to see you again! thank you for requesting!#I see your 'cereal box' french with my 'kraft dinner' french; solidarity #reader; je suis un pomplamousse. rook; ... quoi?

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starchildrenofdustand-ashes · 1 year ago

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Cabaret at TheKit Kat Club Experience !!

So, I saw Cabaret at the Kit Kat Club at the Playhouse theatre on November 15 (11/15/2023) with Nic Myers as Sally and Jake Shears as Emcee.

Below the cut is where spoilers start lol: honestly the whole thing is super secretive- from the stage to the venue itself. So if you ever plan on seeing it live or have the opportunity to do so, you have been warned!

When you walk into the theatre there’s this awesome:

You will see before you descend the stairs; at the bottom of the stairs, they put a sticker on your phone :)

You’ll continue walking down the hall where the walls are white and covered with pictures all over of the actors past and present.

You probably pass some of the actors who are milling about, chatting, flirting, dancing playing instruments.

I was in the first row of the upper dress circle and god it’s tight up there. Definitely wish I’d payed a bit extra to be on the floor and to at least have room 😖

Also note; I don’t talk about Herr Schultz and Frauline Schneiderall that much in these notes, but that’s because their scenes are so sweet and straight forward. These two give you the Schneider and Schultz you’ve seen and you know you love; there’s nothing outlandish or left field that happens with these two like some of the choices with Sally and Emcee. The same can be said for Ernst and Cliff. Nothing wild has been changed with their characters. In fact, most of this will probably be me trying to decode the strange new take on the Emcee and The Kit Kat Club. Anyway! Here are my thoughts and stuff that stuck out to me!

(Also if you’ve seen this production with Eddie Redmayne or have listened to it and have a hypothesis— he makes this strange sound like he’s spitting? In a lot of the songs- I thought it maybe part of the orchestration, but I didn’t notice it with Jake Shears and chalked it up to Eddies character choices. So if you know what the sound is or can give me staging It would soothe my brain)

Willkomenn:

🍷 in Willkomenn, when the Emcee does his whole “comment ca va?, do you feel good” speil he paused after every time, as if to test what language the audience would respond to

🍷 He kept the “do you feel good- yeah I bet you do 😏” line even tho it wasn’t on the revival album🥹

🍷The way to tell Victor and Bobby apart is to lift their arm and stick your face in their armpits and take a big wiff. Bobby did not want his armpits sniffed and Emcee had to beg him

🍷 Bro I love Hermann; he was so stoic and dead inside- he just stood there and did the most basic version of what everyone was doing. He was also fully clothed lol

🍷When they sing the whisper verse, they were all posing in various positions and the Emcee crawled between their legs

Don’t Tell Mama:

🎀 When sally screams at the beginning, she was lying on her back throwing a tantrum

🎀 The Emcee is on stage for the final verse and he acts as Sally’s brother: when sally says the line, “if he squeals on me i squeal on him” they squeezed each others nipples

Perfectly Marvelous

💚When Cliff and Ernst are talking and Sally barges in, she’s wearing her coat, a beige and orange scarf, funky sunglasses and carrying a ton of luggage

💚at the end of Perfectly Marvelous, when Cliff says “besides I’ve only got one narrow bed,” the Emcee rises out of the circle in the center of the platform wearing the exact same thing as Sally: the coat the scarf and the glasses. Two Kit Kat Girls come up the same platform in a suitcase that looks just like the one Sally was carrying

💚 Nic Myers didn’t do an American accent

Two Ladies

👯‍♀️ The KitKatGirl who “makes thebed” puts on a hardware belt and does explicit things with a hammer while the other has a spatula. Or a whisk ,, The One That “Does The Cooking” goes behind Emcee and uses the whisk to “thrust” into him and when he says daily bread, she pulls out a baguette, she also fills out a whip lmao

👯‍♀️ During the instrumental break all the other Kit Kat Members come up through the stage wearing explicit things and doing explicit things to each other. The one that stood out the most to me was Helga jacking off to a copy of Mein Kampf— it was super chaotic and I don’t remember details

It Couldnt Please Me More:

🍍More often than not the sailor Kost was fucking was either Bobby or Hans- even referring to the former as such. Also, they refer to her as Fritzie explicitly so it’s cannon that Kost=Fritzie and not just an actress double casted.

🍍Before Kost runs into Schneider after letting Bobby out, Schultz is leaving Schneiders room and accidentally is trying to out her robe on instead of his jacket

Tomorrow Belongs to Me

* So Emcee comes on stage holding a box and is dressed in a robe and only a wig cap

* One by one, the member of the Kit Kat Klub put these dolls that are wearing brown suits with Blonde hair on the stage. They are standing militanty. very much providing Nazi imagery

* During the song, the figures go around the turn table while emcee is singing

* At the end of the song when he says the last line, he pulls out a blond wig and holds it in the spotlight

Money:

💸Money was the song I was most excited for because of the images I’d seen of the skeleton costume. I had a hard time figuring out why the skeleton, but it was cool nonetheless.

💸 the Emcee rises out of the middle of the floor, his clawed hands reaching out first.

💸 I watched Emcee legit drool on the stage (Groffsauce in Hamilton vibes) he was spitting those lines out so hard

💸 I don’t know how to interpret the staging of the song, the real star of the scene is the costumes, but I took it as the Emcee represented money? Everywhere he went the KitKat Girls followed, wailing and begging him and the surrounding audience for money.

TBTM (reprise )

* I mean. I feel like the staging for this song is always consistent and similar throughout all shows; the individuals singing with Cliff, Sally, Schultz and Sneider standing somberly. The emcee is usually eerily looking on and depending on the show is seemingly jubilant or looking wistful.

* In this, the Emcee rises out of the middle of the turn table wearing his outfit from money. He has a conductors stick and begins conducting them with a smile on his face.

* My sister said the Emcee is “If Art The Clown could talk” and Yeah, that’s pretty accurate. He goes form being the raunchy Emcee we’ve all come to love- I think the Emcee, no matter who plays him is kinda creepy, so the creepiness didn’t seem unusual- to an evil nazi

* But when we see him in money and onwards, he’s definitely giving Killer Clown- she was right, Art the Clown from Terrifier.

* The Art The Clown juxtaposition to when he appears bare faced during some songs was super interesting. It really feels like the idea of “The Nazi’s weren’t demons, they were people who did things we thought demons were only capable of,” and that’s what makes it terrifying. The clowning character is seen praising nazis and cheerfully conducting their songs- he really does seem like a force of evil that’s simply from hell. But then he talks off his makeup in the coming scenes and you’re reminding- he’s just a human who behaves like a demon and that’s terrifying-. Idk if I’m doing the best at explaining my analysis of this, but that’s what I was getting

Kickline

💃🏾The kickline is lively and the members of the Club are trying to hype up the audience before getting into formation

💃🏾They were all wearing red party hats so when the emcee comes on in his red Pierrot clown get up, he has the longest, pointed and most menacing looking hat.

💃🏾he also has a gun? Thing? He shoots a Nazi flag out of it

💃🏾 The Members of the club form a hakenkreuz shape around Emcee and he hand the flag to Bobby and they march off.

Married (reprise)

🧱 the scene before Married Sneider and Schultz are talking about the engagement. Emcee is slinking around the stage and he has something in his hands wrapped in a napkin. His movements remind me of a mime, or as Chelsea says, Art The Clown, the facial expressions with overdramatized emotion and fluidity

🧱 he slinks between Schultz’s and Sneider with a smile on his face and suddenly there’s a loud ass crash that makes- I shit you not- the entire theatre jump. The lights black out. When they rise back on, there is white confetti floating downward, to represent the broken glass

If You Could See Her

🦍Usually, the gorilla in this is dressed up and it looks more cartoonish, but to, this was just a straight up gorilla- (A really good costume) with absolutely no elements of humanity. No clothes, no slightly upturned mouth, no walking on two legs and absolutely no understand what was going on.

🦍The Emcee would address the Gorilla as if she was human, but she would only respond in an animalistic way like scratching her ass, sniffing Emcees ass or flat out ignoring him and doing her own thing.

🦍 The Emcee seemed to be back at his usually self- joking and less like a demonic force - he’s clowning and making the audience laugh and there’s the Jewish line at the end of the song (which?? I was kind of disappointed by. It didn’t give me shivers and I felt it was a bit rushed.) also people laughed, but it could’ve been a “I laugh at funerals bc it’s awkward,” and not because they actually found the situation funny. My sister hypothesized simple confusion for people who had no idea what was going on. I will agree that some of the Emcees choices are strange if you don’t know the plot/ haven’t read up on this revival before hand.

I Don’t Care Much:

🎙️ Next time Emcee is on stage he is wearing a brown suit and a blonde wig, no makeup on his face- he very much resembles the dolls that were placed on stage during TBTM

🎙️I don’t care much occurs after Sally and Cliff have an argument as usual. But after Cliff leaves Sally is getting dressed. She is putting on the same jacket and pants the Emcee is wearing

🎙️during the song the emcee is doing some weird puppet thing behind her and she’s mirroring the moves she’s doing. it was an interesting choice during this song, but I think it’s been my least favorite change. It was like she was on strings and he was controlling her. I guess it provided a good visual for the notion that the Emcee isn’t a person, rather a representation of the deteriorating culture of the the city as a whole.

🎙️ This song is good at humanizing the Emcee, especially in Alan Cummings revival; smeared makeup, track marks, slurred worlds and stilted motions. It really paints a picture of a human at the end of their rope. In this version it just solidifies that the emcee is the city of Berlin and the evils that are taking over (Which, goes in direct opposition to my previous theory on his costumes providing human- demon Nazi images but whatever I dont have the brain power to think harder about it)

🎙️ After this song Cliff gets beat up by Ernst. After the tussle, the nazi thugs are actually the members of the Kit Kat club, they are wearing the same coat as Sally and the Emcee. They finish Cliff off and take his coat away

Cabaret

🍷I mean. Damn. There’s not much to say here. Outstanding performance. Like there are performances from different actors on YouTube so you could watch those to see the blocking because it’s pretty much the same.

🍷 Nic Myers did an amazing job, I got full body chills

🍷 one critique I’ve heard is that it’s over directed and this song is the perfect example of it. As an actor and a director, I understand both sides,; I don’t see much individuality between the actors on YouTube vs Nic Myers because the staging is so specific. I will say, through my opera glasses, the emotion painted in her face couldn’t be replicated and I think that’s really where the nuances will lie- in their faces.

Finale

📸 The Emcee is back on the stage, in the same position as Willkomenn- it’s like this weird pose with his arms and legs bent (you can watch the Willkomenn performance in gram nortons show,, that’s the pose I’m talking about ((I’ve heard people say it’s supposed to look like a hakenkreuz ))the only difference is now he’s in his brown outfit with his blonde hair. Super eerie.

📸 All the characters are standing on the turn table and the Kit Kat Members are on the outer circle of the turn table wearing the same beige suit the emcee has on. The other characters are all wearing brown and there’s an eerie sense of uniformity.

📸 Then there’s the long ass drum roll as they continue to turn before the lights blackout.

#cabaret #cabaret west end #cabaret 2021 #cabaret at the kit kat club #eddie redmayne #jessie buckley #Jake shears #nic Myers #kander and ebb #cabaret revival #musical #cabaret musical #she reviews #my reviews

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spitefulcrepechan · 2 months ago

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[Click for better quality]

That first one and the dandy one are jokes btw dont take em too seriously

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chic-a-gigot · 1 year ago

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Le Petit écho de la mode, no. 49, vol. 23, 8 décembre 1901, Paris. 4. Chapeau, vêtement et toilettes de ville. Ville de Paris / Bibliothèque Forney

I. Col ds forme ronde en guipure d’Irlande.

II. Chapeau MERCÉDÉS en velours noir, orné d’une palme fantaisie; le côté gauche, légèrement relevé, est retenu par un nœud en velours toutes nuances En vente au prix de 9 fr. 45 franco.

III. Robe en drap zibeline noisette. La jupe en forme est garnie de baguettes piquées formant la pointe sur le devant. Le boléro se compose d’un dos d’une seule pièce et d’un devant s’ouvrant sur un gilet de taffetas recouvert d’un coquillé de mousseline de soie surmonté d’un col drapé. Manches demi-longues se retournant en revers bordé d’un biais d’où s’échappe un bouffant de mousseline de soie serré dans un petit poignet. Mat.: 6 mèt. de drap. 0 m. 50 de taffetas, 0 m. 50 de mousseline de soie en 1 m. 20 de large.

IV. Robe pour fillette de cinq à sept ans en lainage gris acier. La jupe, plissée à petits plis lingerie, est garnie au bas d’une haute broderie de soie faite à môme. Le corsage-blouse s’ouvre devant sur un petit plastron de guipure posée sur transparent de satin. Grand col marin en lainage brodé se terminant devant en revers. Manches d’une seule pièce serrées dans un poignet. Haute ceinture de ruban se douant derrière. Mat.: 4 mèt. de lainage.

V. Robe en taffetas et velours. La jupe-corselet, rayée de biais de velours, est recouverte d’un boléro de velours s’ouvrant légèrement devant sur un plastron de guipure encadré de revers de taffetas et velours retenus par des petits boulons de cristal. Manches demi-longues garnies d’un revers découpé en dents et agrémenté de petits boutons. Haut poignet de mousseline de soie froncée formant trois bouffants. Mat.: 10 mèt. de taffetas, 2 mèt. de velours.

VI. Robe en drap vert amande et velours même ton. La jupe, doublée de taffetas, est garnie de biais de velours gracieusement disposés. La veste se compose d’un dos à couture, d’uh petit côté de dos et de devant et d’un devant ajusté par une pince. Col montant. Cette veste, doublée de taffetas, a la même garniture que la jupe. Manches demi-longues retombant sur un bouffant de mousseline de soie. Chapeau en feutre orné autour de la calotte d’une plume amazone et d’une draperie de velours. Mat.: 6 mèt. de drap, 1 mèt. de velours, 0 m. 25 de mousseline de soie.

VII. Vêtement en loutre, se composant d’un dos droit et d’un devant croisé se retournant en revers et fermé par des gros boutons fantaisie. Col Marceau. Manches à coude. Chapeau drapé en drap noir orné de chenille noire et d’un oiseau étendant ses ailes.

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I. Round collar in Irish guipure.

II. MERCÉDÉS hat in black velvet, decorated with a fancy palm leaf; the left side, slightly raised, is held in place by a velvet bow in all shades On sale at the price of 9.45 francs.

III. Dress in hazelnut sable cloth. The shaped skirt is trimmed with stitched baguettes forming the point on the front. The bolero consists of a one-piece back and a front opening onto a taffeta vest covered with a shell of silk chiffon topped with a draped collar. Half-long sleeves turning into cuffs edged with a bias from which escapes a silk chiffon bouffant tightened in a small wrist. Mat.: 6 meters cloth, 0.5 m. taffeta, 0.5 m. chiffon 1.2 m. wide.

IV. Dress for girls aged five to seven in steel gray wool. The skirt, pleated with small lingerie pleats, is trimmed at the bottom with high silk embroidery made by me. The bodice-blouse opens in front with a small guipure bib placed on transparent satin. Large embroidered wool sailor collar ending in reverse at the front. One-piece sleeves cinched into one cuff. High ribbon belt tied behind. Mat.: 4 meters wool.

V. Taffeta and velvet dress. The corselet skirt, striped with velvet bias, is covered with a velvet bolero opening slightly in front on a guipure bib framed with taffeta and velvet cuffs held in place by small crystal bolts. Half-long sleeves trimmed with a lapel cut into teeth and decorated with small buttons. High cuff of gathered silk chiffon forming three bouffants. Mat.: 10 m. taffeta, 2 meters velvet.

VI. Dress in almond green cloth and velvet in the same tone. The skirt, lined with taffeta, is trimmed with gracefully arranged velvet bias. The jacket consists of a back seam, a small back and front side and a front adjusted with a dart. Collar. This jacket, lined with taffeta, has the same trim as the skirt. Half-long sleeves falling over a silk chiffon bouffant. Felt hat decorated around the crown with an Amazon feather and velvet drapery. Mat.: 6 meters. of sheet, 1 meter. velvet, 0.25 m. chiffon.

VII. Otter garment, consisting of a straight back and a crossed front turning into a lapel and closed with large fancy buttons. Col Marceau. Elbow sleeves. Draped hat in black cloth decorated with black chenille and a bird spreading its wings.

#Le Petit écho de la mode #20th century #1900s #1901 #on this day #December 8 #periodical #fashion #fashion plate #panorama #description #Forney #dress #coat #collar #devant et dos

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