#being built from scratch
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i'm fixing a switch pro controller my sister gave me in a nonfunctional state, but it turned out to be fake so now i'm basically just building a switch pro controller from scratch because the fake parts aren't compatible with actual real switch pro replacement parts
#i replaced the motherboard with an OEM refurb but it turns out that the original (fake) one is using a different ribbon cable size#so now i need to replace the daughterboard for compatibility#and the battery and casing already were damaged and in need of replacement#so this is just. a whole ass controller#being built from scratch#look i just spent an hour and a half soldering i'm seeing this through to the end
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What if I turned minecraft mobs into playable dnd races?
#ocedraws#enderman#aether#minecraft#mineblr#Endri#Ezthri#minecraft dnd be like#I have whole lore on these guys and hhhhhhh#Ezthri and Endri are sister species that evolved differently after being separated into two dimensions (aether and end)#Ezthri have much smaller pupils and eyes because of how bright the aether is and endri have massive eyes because of how dark the void is#they both have nictating membranes (third eyelid)#Yes endri can still teleport like their wild counterpart#I’m still working on full lore and abilities since Ezthri are built from scratch#ocequeue
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doc scratch's existence hinging on LE arriving ==>
==> bro's existence hinging on dave arriving ==>
==> both caliborn and dave being time players ==>
==> caliborn choosing dave as his 'fated nemisis' in homosuck thus making it true across paradox space
also doc scratch talking like AR/Dirk-a-little-to-the-left. maybe doc scratch also sounds like bro. yknow without all the excellent host jokes. but theres smth about dirk and dirk-adjacient splinters providing a sort of ground zero for 'fated' adversaries, both time players. doc scratch and LE try to control ALL time players- caliborn is a lord of time after all.
and adding prince of heart players (dirk, bro, hal) into this mix compounds the 'propagation/reproduction' themes of that specific classpect, thru both the inherent splintering nature that heart players have and dirk's more personal struggle w/ the concept of parenthood in general. its like dirks fears of parenthood/pregnancy get filtered through doc scratch and made literal in the 'birth' of LE. also massive zeus-birthing-hera-from-his-head energy for both doc scratch => LE and dirk => hal but thats pretty plain to see. dirk's body is the Game's playground. hal losing his sense of self and individuality in the game thru spriting and being absorbed into lil cal is also related to dirks body being bedrock for the Game. i mean its all one massive perpetual closed loop
#our t#i think scratch even makes an mpreg joke at some point but i might be misremembering. insane if true#body stuff#thinking abt the norse creation myth of midgard being built from the body of a giant#yes i am making an SA analogy with caliborn and dirk bc i mean#caliborn *specifically* targets dirk and hal and their other splinters to get to dave over and over again#esp if u go with dave's own theory of lil cal having a lot of smth to do with bros behaviour#turns out dirk strider and anya mouthwashing have a lot in common narrative ways [falls into a crevass]#meat!dirk taking control of the narrative is similar to anya making the decision to kill herself. autonomy. closes book bangs gavil
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my boss telling me there's an easier way to do something after she bothered IT when the way they showed her was exactly the same I did??? AND she completely did not absorb an important nuance about the data until IT told her (even though I mentioned it SEVERAL times)
#i hate being a woman in tech#shit like this happens all the time. IT is either doing the exact same shit i do or doing it WORSE bc it's a bunch of old men#me: you just need to add the state filter#her: look at this much easier way to get the data!#the data: exactly the same but it has the state filter??????#girl i was trying to build you a template you can use instead of doing it from scratch every time!!! I WAS TRYING TO MAKE YOUR LIFE EASY#anyway it's incredibly frustrating sometimes to know more about our system than IT#bc i just have to sit there and hear them be like 'oh we figured out this new thing' and i'm like miles ahead already#training us on stuff like bro i BUILT this at my last job. please.#i guess it's bc of data integrity. i am always explaining the issues w the data as well and they don't wanna hear it#sigh. i need a fuckin snack
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"oh look! There's your linens. If you're lucky 🙄"
Actually I have decided you are not lucky. Beg.
#i have been at this ladies beck and call for the last MONTH#when she was in detox it was understandable bc its detox#but even now shes SUCH an ASS#literally nothing is enough for her#the only way i could please this woman is if i bought brand new linens a new bed and built a new room from scratch#literally insulting us when we've come back in to sweep your already spotless room 3 times now. at that point do it yourself#people being mean here is soooo rare but god when it happens its so annoying#i just gave her the linens but god. maybe have any level of kindness towards me
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The wallpaper I've been aspiring to have on my walls for the last 3 years has finally been delivered ⚜️
#I've been wanting to wallpaper my walls for ages. I took it seriously in fall of 2021 too when I measured my current walls and was-#deciding between 2 pink wallpapers. Eventually I made a pro/con list & decided against the idea with the conclusion of doing it in the next#place I live in. Now that I'm moving & renovating my future room I ordered one of the 2 wallpapers I was debating back in '21#the room is being built up from scratch and is essentially a blank slate I can decorate however#the rolls arrived today and they are exquisite!! I was so surprised with how fast the shipping was because I only made the order on Monday#and the samples took over a month to arrive. & I can't tell you how BIG of a fan I am of wallpaper. Literally best decor ever#personal
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I feel like a fucking feral animal that needs to be pinned down by the throat and stabbed.. i mean fucked argh no what i wanted to say.. is i need to be fucking sta
#nsfwtext#loosing my marbles#thinking about fucking provoking them#acting out#scratching them#to make them violate me and fuck me to pieces because i need it so so much#but they just think it's cute#poking fun at me for being so desperate for them#being pinned by the throat i slowly start getting weaker and they praise me for being good and relaxing#fucking me oh so slowly and it's NOT ENOUGH#but it's all I am going to get#struggling#trying to fuck myself back into them#but it just makes them press harder#until I am all still#like a little doll#teary eyed from my endless need and how feeling them rut into me so gently doesn't give me any relief.. it just makes it worse#feeling like going crazy and breaking down while they push a finger into my mouth to suck on#slapping me and then going back to chockeing me.#feeling my arousal built more and more#wanting them so much it doesn't matter if it's pleasure or pain begging to be kicked or fucked harder or cut or punched or skull fucked#just anything to truely feel them#argh#i am about to start biting people i need this#thinking about the times someone made me hurt so bad during a scene i felt like I need to throw up#like me brain was all pain and somehow it still got worse with each hit#that pain is so bad i feel like blacking out#saying yellow and#how just one touch was enough to flip the switch and what was pain just a second before was now arousal uggh am so needy for pain rn#when you are so full of pain in a scene it's like your consciousness morphs and all there is is you and pain and your partner
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sorry if I don’t remember your name or conversations/experiences or basic things about myself, every few weeks my brain gets factory reset and I have to relearn how to be alive
#lighthearted but also serious bc what is going on here buddy#been feeling weird as hell these past few months#like I can remember some stuff… but it doesn’t feel normal to forget the names of anyone I haven’t seen/heard the name of in a few days#or forget about basic interests and personality traits and experiences and feel like a blank slate every day#idk like ultimately life goes on and I’m happy to live in the moment but it would be nice to understand why my brain is doing this#just thinking#meposting#I think my brain just. does this sometimes when I’m stressed. which is annoying#I recall (lmao) feeling similar during earlier parts of life so this isn’t *new* it’s just unexpected and much more disruptive as an adult#I’m feeling better about it than I was. after like. acknowledging it. bc my mind has not always felt like a sieve it isn’t always this bad.#whatever#I’ll tag as dissociation just in case it’s related/reminiscent and ppl don’t want to see that#dissociation#me and her go way back… haven’t seen each other in years though#she wasnt all bad! coping mechanisms can provide relief and a sense of safety#and as far as coping mechanisms go it’s not the most unhealthy. though it ranks high in ‘socially stunting’#I kind of miss the distance sometimes to be honest everything’s just So Much all the time#I’m so solid now#so stuck in the ruts of capitalism#fuck capitalism#I wish my imagination didn’t feel so dulled#sorry I love talking#and I don’t miss dissociation when I feel mentally present because I feel so Here with the people and things I love but rn?#it’s like a lose-lose bc I am not Here nor am I untethered. I’m heavy yet hold nothing#I enjoy being dramatic/poetic about it — I feel pretty fine. I just hope this isn’t a permanent and/or long-term state of existence.#like it makes me awful at my job I went from remembering a solid amount of the student body’s names (built up over a few years) to. like 5.#overnight it felt like. like Stressful Thing happened and I went to work and I couldn’t remember anyone’s names.#can’t believe I have to start from fucking scratch AGAIN I’d be better off quitting and working at a different school#bc at least then my lack of knowledge/remembering is justified rather than strange and seemingly rude#I’m getting better now but at the beginning of this it was blue screen in my brain all the time
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I'm working on setting up my own business and it's less
entrepreneur
And more
✨🪄🌪️EnTReprOnOUR 💥👹🔥
#I built a website from scratch with zero experience but now I'm stuck on the final touches before officially opening business#the final touches being not breaking the law#I am having problems with my disorganized poorly-communicating manager which is also me#I am also struggling with my chaotic unpredictable staff which is also me#why not speedrun setting up a business but then getting delayed on the officially opening part
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this might not make sense. but i feel like after moving to america masato’s dramatic ass would start thinking of Daigo as Right Person Wrong Time & like he’d make Daigo the embodiment of his “sordid” youth & how he’s Outgrown smudged eyeliner and drunken bathroom hookups. so he Becomes Ryo Aoki and returns to Japan & sees chairman Daigo with his slicked back hair & pressed suit & pleasant smiles, the same image that Ryo Aoki wears, but different, somehow. Daigo still has his familiar stubble & his dark eyes, Shitty 20-something Daigo is still there in Chairman Daigo. somehow, Daigo managed to change, managed to be this better, fuller, realer person without killing off his former self. while Ryo Aoki changed his name, burned his bridges, went under the knife and became an entirely new being. I think it’d infuriate Masato, it’d drive him mad, out of jealousy and superiority. How stupid of Daigo to keep his past so close to his chest. How lucky of Daigo to be able to transform without having to shoot his past between the eyes.
Meanwhile Daigo is just like 🧍♂️ nice glasses nerd.
(Sorry if this is incoherent)
anon i cant stress how much im eating this and seasoning it and putting it in every soup and dish i make i am injecting this straight into my bloodstream and i'm turning this into a pill so i can take it every day oh my god
#fave#spoilers#y7 spoilers#masadai#snap chats#aoki really out here with the daily planet aesthetic tho.... ok clark kent...#but yeah anon. anon this is doing things to my brain. the worms are FEASTING tonight oh my god.#i cant gift basket you a year's supply of tirimasu when you're on anon jesus christ i feel like gabriel just threw this through my window#eguhUHHHUH daigo being able to change but still retain who he is while aoki had to start from scratch..#tbf his dumbass was responsible for that but still... my god he'd be so angry... furious... jealous even#more reasons to want to demolish the tojo: he wants to take everything daigo's built up for himself and the yakuza#he wants to take that life away and to make daigo feel the pressure of having to start life over#too bad daigo was already planning that.. aoki cant even get that satisfaction#girl im going insane !!! oh my god !!!!!#JUST A SLAP IN THE FACE one of few things to remind aoki of his past life and dude's thriving#dude's basically his adversary- absolutely his number one target#his pursuit for political power's been nothing but personal but this especially feels like it'd be closing the chapter on his old life#and Again. aoki can't even have that totally on his terms he doesn't get the joy of watching daigo panic and crumble#he gets to move on to his ventures as he planned and now all he can do is seethe#brb dying. readmitting myself to the hospital i wasn't left to cook in there long enough im still ill
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waffled nonstop at myself for nearly two hours trying to make sense of worldbuilding in shadow of israphel and now im winded lmao
#*deep space noises*#and came to few conclusions#its a fuckin mess canonically ive thrown like half of it out#the wall has been there for more than 100 years first of all#im not having that much of a worldbuilding cornerstone being built from scratch in living memory
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I think it would be cool if there was a Fallout game that takes place in an Asian or European country. Just to see what’s happening over there.
Also I think it’d be cool if there was an Age of Empires style Fallout game where the point is to rebuild civilization rather than just living off the garbage from 200 years ago.
#seriously how are there no mining operations yet?#there’s no smelting of ore#there’s no large scale food production#there’s no actual civilization being built here#it’s just small tribes living off the refuse of the old world#nobody’s actually creating or procuring resources and establishing a coherent system of gov or justice#it’s actually really weird#like it’s not as if you’re starting from scratch here#why aren’t you farther along?#why are you not even in the Bronze Age?#I haven’t even seen a single wheeled cart#I know damn well you understand the concept of the wheel#flippin USE it#why is the world so far behind?#is there a lore reason for this?#fallout#fallout lore#fallout 4#age of empires
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You ever get sad thinking about BG2 because of all the suffering that the main character goes through?
i do, but since i install xan there and he makes things 10x worse i mainly end up getting mad at his script instead 🫠
radri could survive everything in soa and tob; she can close herself off to get the job done, and her character would change and she would never properly process all the pain and the grief but she would take solace in knowing that she never needed anyone but herself. but when xan is there, he's essentially a direct line to her sensitivity/optimism/innocence/etc, and when he behaves the way he does in the mod, in the context of her story, it's honestly almost a greater source of pain than irenicus. it's why i haven't finished my current playthrough yet lol
#sovo answers#sorry for giving another xan based answer lmao i feel like i always tie it back to my overwhelming disappointment in his sequel#i can condone the suffering and the death but i draw the line at xan being heterosexual and uncaring#look i lovvve the suffering bc it adds drama which adds interest which brings characters closer together#its prime for hurt/comfort and xan was built for hurt/comfort and yet he just doesnt deliver!! it no longer hits right or at all!#so thats why i have to redo him from scratch. im cutting him to pieces and putting them back a better way
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just realized i might be cool???
#like i know how to program and cook and bake and do calligraphy and watercolor and can sort of draw#right now i do archery and i learned the basics of a bunch of martial arts (muay thai + kung fu + tae kwon do)#and i learned the basics of fencing#i used to shave with a straight razor and i sharpen my own knives#im an ok rock climber and tree climber#i did folk dancing for 2 years#i learned basic sailing and fishing and know how to swim#ive done 2 50km hikes and was on my highschool's rugby team#i tutor people in math and python#i can read ipa#and can sorta read hangeul cyrillic and chinese and farsi#i know the basics of building a fire#i built a giant chickenwire sculpture of a fish once#my friend liked one of my paintings so much its hanging in her house#i know how to book bind and taught it to my sister#she and i built a bookshelf from scratch together#i have a jacket i made myself out of scraps#i can make a brooch in less than 5 minutes#i have operated a nuclear reactor#one time i freaked out my professor by being able to recite the first bit of the pirates of panzance modern general song without fucking up#i can do the thing where you open a bottle by hitting it on a corner#oh i forgot i did capoeira and fencing for a bit!#oh i recently learned how to wrap gifts without using any tape!#ok this has gotten really long#im not doing this to show off or anything#this is genuinely the first time i realized some of this stuff might be impressive to people#since ive got this whole jack of all trades master of none thing going on#except i hang out with a shit ton of masters of one#but like fuck dude#was it kurt vonnegut who had the quote about like the things you do dont stop mattering when you put them down
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briefly went to war in my o chem server over my server nickname (someone kept switching it to my REAL NAME which, like, fair, i guess, since we're all classmates, but DAMMIT i am TRYING to GATEKEEP who can TAG ME), and for now it seems like we have a truce (i changed it to the literal chinese translation of my english name), but i think i've concluded that i hate it when people know who i am so immediately in these kinds of situations bc i tend to draw a lot of attn to myself irl anyway, n people get too afraid to approach me, but when they can't read my name at all, their eyes just kinda glaze over that part at all, n they seem to approach me with fewer biases
#the older i get the more often i'm told that i subvert/defy a lot of people's expectations/first impressions of me#which like. is cool! but the first impression i give off is apparently pretty unapproachable#so i guess i feel like when people don't know it's Me they're more willing to approach for help which i'm happy to give#smth smth the burden of having built a particular identity/perception over the course of the years#before you rlly knew what you were doing n now you don't know quite how to adjust the existing reputation#like don't get me wrong!! i love to subvert people's expectations of me; n i think i've been getting better at sociability#like. chatting w/coworkers n getting to know people from scratch doesn't feel like an arduous task at all anymore?#i think i just like the feeling of being approached on equal terms; n having an unreadable name online helps that#the worm speaks
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every time i see a post that fits my dnd campaign im running i have to stop the urge from rambling nonstop about it to anyone who will listen i feel like a feral animal just like
#this campaign is my baby but its homebrew so i get so embarrassed so easily#like everything is homebrew. i built this setting from scratch#ive had ppl tell me i should like#publish it into one of those dnd books#but imagine being percieved#anyways enough rambling i have to finish an animatic for said campaign ASRDGDFHG
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