#being 'fixed' or trying to 'go back to normal'

[logansbaby]

Worst Logan is probably so touch starved

oh absolutely!!!!! thank you wonderful anon for sharing bc you’ve inspired this tiny drabble <3 extremely short but completely spurred on by my need to hug worst logan ty!

no warnings! just one use of slut by wade (ofc)

word count - around 1k

also, the song hear you me by jimmy eat world kept coming to me during this so! vibes maybe?

˚｡⋆⟡♡⟡⋆｡˚

Logan Howlett hates physical touch.

He hates the way people often go about trying to touch him, whether it be a brief tangle of fingers or a simple hug, he hates it.

He’s not entirely sure where it’s stemmed from, especially considering that as a younger man, he didn’t mind it. Maybe it’s because of the fact that people he cared for were always too far out of reach, leaving him a swirling mess filled with the aches that follow with unrequited feelings. Or, maybe its the fact that once he’d begun to open up to the people he considered family, he’d failed to protect them, only left to ruin their legacy with his destructive, lethal grief.

The reason doesn’t matter, not really, because he’s okay with being alone, nursing copious amounts of whisky shots to numb his loud thoughts.

His plan of rotting away in a bar alone goes to shit the minute Wade shows up and drags him into the shit show he’d landed himself in.

And somehow, after everything settles down, he finds himself stuck in a new universe, living with far too many bodies in Wade's apartment. He wonders why he stayed to begin with, especially with the way Wade pisses him off like no other, but he knows. In the back of his mind, he knows that the group of people he’s come to know have weaseled their way inside his guarded heart. Knowing doesn’t make it any easier to accept, though.

The red masked man often tells him he needs to get laid, get up and find someone to fix his grumpy, brooding act he has going on if he’s not going to let Wade do it himself (his words, not Logan’s).

And whenever he presses too much, Logan’s claws will unsheathe with that unmistakable snikt! before they dig into whatever limb of Wade’s is closest.

People had caught on very early that Logan dislikes physical contact, so it’s an unspoken rule by everyone to not push the man. Well, everyone except Wade— the man has been impaled by adamantium far too many times and never learns. That, or he just likes the pain a little too much.

So, it comes to a surprise to everyone when Logan doesn’t yell at you, sink his claws into a nearby surface in warning, or growl when you wrap the man in a hug the first time you meet him.

It’s at some party thrown by Wade— purely an excuse for the man to see Vanessa under the guise of a celebration for his newest hair system— or whatever the fuck he’d rambled on about, Logan wasn’t listening.

He’d been on his way out, the ghost taste of whisky tingling his tongue as he plans to waste away at the closest bar, when he catches a glimpse of something akin to an angel.

That something is you.

You— in all your pretty glory, a beacon of light that glows through the entirety of the dull apartment with just a single smile. Hair frames your face with wisps that kiss rosy-painted cheeks as you laugh at something someone says. A floral dress sits atop of curves that will absolutely haunt his nights. The scent of you tickles his heightened senses— a swirl of vanilla and honey so sweet that he suppresses a groan.

Logan believes then and there you’re a princess, an angel, something ethereal and enchanting. He wonders then why you’re friends with Wade.

He’s already speechless at the sight of you, wrapped up in thoughts, that he doesn’t realize you’re suddenly in front of him until an obnoxious voice startles him from the depths of his mind.

“Peanut! How could you leave without saying hi to sweetness here? Horribly rude if you ask me.”

Under any normal circumstance, Logan would’ve growled at the man before him, followed by a string of curses. However, he’s too occupied with his body thrumming at the sudden proximity and closeness to you.

“Hi!”

Of course, it makes sense that your voice matches your looks; sweet and syrupy with an addictive lilt.

Before he can utter a poorly spoken sentence, his body goes rigid, every muscle within him immediately tense as an unfamiliar weight is on him.

“Oh, peaches, you don’t want to do that, Wolvie isn’t much of a hugger—“ Wade’s warning comes too late, given the fact that you’re already wrapped around the man frozen in place.

And in an instant, the entire room is silent, because everyone here has witnessed Logan’s distaste when being touched, usually at the hands of Wade.

Logan’s body tingles with how still he is— waiting for that awful feeling to consume every bit of him at the touch of another.

Except, the feeling never comes.

Oblivious, your arms squeeze Logan’s waist as you hug him tightly, head resting against his chest, where his heart hammers maddeningly.

Why is he resisting the urge to bury his nose in your hair?

“I just want to say thank you. I don’t know how you did it, Wade won’t tell me. But I know you saved this universe and I couldn’t be more grateful!”

And, what?

He's confused. You’re speaking to him like you’ve known him your whole life, and he’s not used to this. He’s familiar with people regarding him with disgust or poorly conceived opinions, not this.

“I love my life, truly! My sweet little dog, my friends, my bakery, I couldn’t imagine it being taken away quicker than a breath, so thank you, Logan. Thank you so much!”

Genuine gratefulness coats your rambled words; it’s s then Logan realizes that you’ve pulled back, though your hands still rest causally on his hips, a kind smile gracing your face.

It also dawns on him that the dreaded feeling that often follows people touching him never came Instead, a pleasant tingle kisses the skin that your hands and body touched. Logan has never been more perplexed in his life.

The feel of you is taken away promptly, Wade yanking your body away from his and pulling you to his chest.

“Sorry sweetness, but Logan isn’t known for his love for hugs. He doesn’t like people touching him, it doesn’t end well. And, considering you’re you, I prefer you alive and healthy, not being turned into a human kabob.”

And at that, you feel horror fill you up, your heart sinking, face flushing.

Because oh my gosh, you never would have done that if you had known! but why did you anyway?! you always acted without thought and clearly it had caught up with you!

“I’m so, so unbelievably sorry! I— I didn’t mean to cross boundaries or make you uncomfortable! I’m so—“ before you can ramble yourself into further embarrassment, a deep voice cuts you off.

“S’okay.”

The words are simple, quick. Yet, the delivery of them shakes every person in the room to their core. The implication isn’t to be missed— Logan has never reacted that way to being touched before.

It’s quiet— the room watching with curiosity pooling their eyes and you’re filled to the brim with mortification. And then, the silence is gone when Wade gasps dramatically.

“Peanut, I’m hurt! I thought we had something special, I’ve been playing the long game. And now that’s ruined because some slut stole you away? With a hug? No offense, angel face, but I’m feeling catty.”

His nonsense snaps you out of your head and you roll your eyes, muttering a ‘shut up!’ before focusing on Logan’s face, the man currently glaring at Wade’s face.

“Logan, I’m so sorry. I really am—“

“Don’t worry about it.” He says, but what he really wants to say is please don’t be, your hug felt like home and didn’t make me feel sick for the first time in a long, long time.

You smile, weariness still present. The way your pretty lips stretch into a tiny grin, at him no less, he knows he’s got to get out of there, or he’ll spiral.

You’re about to speak again, but he can’t stop himself from following his instincts. He doesn’t say anything else before practically running out the door, his breath only releasing once he's out of your presence.

And while the man is gulping down numbing alcohol, mind a whirlwind of confusion at himself and youyouyou, the apartment is loud due to Wade having a breakdown.

“—Seriously! I get a claw to the stomach anytime I get to close but you waltz in and suddenly Logan is all for touch? I feel cheated on.”

“Wade, you’re completely overreacting. Maybe you should’ve warned me! I made a complete idiot of myself!” You huff, pacing the tiny living room to expel the anxiety coiling in your abdomen.

“No, baby. The only idiot is me for thinking he’d want me back!” Wade whines, dramatic as usual, and throws himself onto the couch, a move that lands himself in Vanessa’s lap. The woman pats his head in fake sympathy.

“Wade! Shut up, oh my god! He’s never gonna talk to me again!”

And unknowingly, both Logan and you are worrying yourselves sick about that damn hug and the spark that spread from your heart to his.

And maybe, just maybe, Logan doesn’t hate touch after all.

[billieswildflow3r]

Oh plssss give us another blurb with reader, Billie, and baby Siyah🙏🏼

your wish is my command 🙂‍↕️ <3

My Baby’s Mama

SYNOPSIS: you and Billie take a rain check and decide to bake cookies, little did you two know, baby siyah was ready to come.

fluff, kinda long, and time skips !!

Billie stands behind you, her front pressed against your body as she rubs your stomach. She kisses your neck with low hums, leaving tiny love bites between them.

your belly has reached it’s peak and your due date is near, you were mentally preparing yourself day by day to finally give birth to your baby boy.

Billie was ecstatic about the thought of a mini you roaming around the house, even though he wouldn’t have a pinch of her DNA, she’d still invite Siyah into to this world with open arms.

She already had prepared hospital bags, formula, diapers, anything that your baby needed to be healthy and took care of.

“can you check on the cookies, my love?” you hum into her mouth as she sweetly kissed you, she nods her head and pulls away doing as told.

Billie sets the hot pan of cookies on the counter, being careful not to burn herself. “damn these look good..,” she mumbles, hesitant to grab one.

you slap her hand with a giggle “let them cool first greedy,”

she frowns and leans against the counter, her eyes still set on the cookies. you distract her with a peck on her cheek, before you could pull away she holds you in place to kiss your lips.

you wrap your arms around her shoulders, bringing her only a bit closer as you deepen the kiss. Billie moans in your mouth and palms your ass, “you smell so good, mama,” she rasps in your ear before nipping at it.

moments like these made you wish you gave birth sooner.

as the cookies cooled, you and Billie made out. She ran her fingers through your hair and smiled when you whimpered in her mouth after she’d suck your tongue.

those small sounds slowly turned into wincing after awhile.

“Y/n, what’s wrong?” Billie said pulling away, you held onto her shoulder in pain, a sharp contraction in your stomach.

you kept your breath steady, but before you knew it there was fluids gushing from between your legs. You whined with wide eyes.

Billie was panicking, she was running around the house trying to get every pre-packed hospital bag, food, necessities and all sorts of things.

“can you walk?” she asked, before you could reply your hunched over position already gave her the answer. she picked you up bridal style and headed towards the car.

once it started, Billie had no remorse for others on the highway, it was less than likely she’d get a ticket this late at night anyways.

listening to you wailing in pain right beside her only increased her speed and soon you two were at the hospital.

ੈ✩‧₊˚

You were laid on a hospital bed with IV’s hooked up all over, you decided to do an epidural since your contractions were so bad. it worked pretty well so now you’re sipping on juice and watching your favorite show.

Billie was editing a music video that would soon to come out on the couch right beside you, showing you little funny things she could do to the video before fixing it to normal.

“Alright Y/N, your dilation is at about 9 centimeters, we only have an hour to go and you’ll be ready, okay?”

you nod your head as a reply to the nurse, bracing yourself for the excruciating pain you’re about to endure. Billie grabs your hand from the couch and looks back at you lovingly with a soft smile, holding eye contact.

She brings it to her lips to kiss it, pulling away shortly to admire the jewls on your nails. She made sure you had multiple self care appointments before this day came.

After an hour, you’re ready. You take slow nervous breaths as you cling onto Billies shirt, subtle pain sitting between your legs.

“I-..I don’t know if i can do this..,” you mutter with pure anxiety.

“it’s okay baby, i’m right here.” She whispers to you softly as she opens your sweaty palm, locking her hand with yours and kissing your forehead.

ੈ✩‧₊˚

“you’re almost done mama, you got it!” Billie praises, wincing silently at how hard you’re gripping her hand. you’re eyes slowly water at the pain and pressure, the epidural only last so much.

you wail in pain, clenching your teeth as you give one final push. The whole room seems to light up at the sight and sound of your newborn baby.

“would you like to cut the umbilical cord?” The nurse said says holding out the scissors to Billie. She pauses, smiling wearily with a nod.

After your wife happily cuts the cord, they bring Siyah up to your chest, you cradle your baby with eyes full of tears, Billie thought you couldn’t look any more beautiful.

She just sat and watched the moment, admiring you and your baby. How much he resembled you, especially with his hair. She couldn’t wait to see the color of his eyes, she’d wonder if they were just like yours.

please don’t mind if this is bad, i haven’t written anything in a while :((

[dare-to-dm]

I voted earlier today. There were a lot of big things on the Missouri ballot other than the presidential election, such as ranked choice voting, an abortion amendment, sports gambling and increasing minimum wage. So even though I know my state is going to swing red, I don't feel like I wasted my time going to the polls.

However, there was a snafu at the polls. Basically the machine that we feed our paper ballots into jammed. I wasn't too nervous though, because I saw the poll workers there react quickly, calmly and professionally. They immediately started gathering the ballots of those who hadn't been able to put them in the machine, and assured us all that the ballots would still be counted as normal. And they replaced the ballot of the poor guy who jammed the machine, because it was completely shredded.

I reached out to my housemate who was also working the polling place to see if he could give me further insight on how our ballots would be treated. I was a little nervous that my ballot might be treated like a provisional ballot since it wasn't being counted by the machine. Provisional ballots are perfectly legitimate of course, but I just know the Republicans are going to throw up a stink about them this year and try to paint them as a source of fraud.

Anyway, my housemate got back to me to let me know that they had fixed the machine as quickly as possible. And that all the ballots that were collected during that time would be fed into the machine at the end of the polling period and counted as normal.

It's a lot easier to have trust in the system when you're not afraid to ask questions and make sure you understand the process. From what I observed, I have trust that my local polling place is being run ethically and efficiently. I am very grateful that someone I trust is directly involved in overseeing the process. This is the value of community involvement.

[lilpotatjj]

Couldn't wait to write it all down. Our sweetheart Cait became emotional after taking off her wig for the last time. And we all ken that there's only one person she gets the comfort right? Here ye go (it's a wee bit longer as I thought..should I be sorry?..nae ;) )

Warning: sweet comfort and some sadness and a wee bit of drama. And a Sam that is so in scots character 😂👀

One last time

There it lay...a simple scrap of hair. Simple? It was anything but simple. This wig was a part of her existence, her life. It had been with her for eleven years and it was hard to believe that this was the last time it would be taken off. She tried to pull herself together and put the mobile aside, the tears still in her eyes. Recorded for eternity and for those who made it possible to embody Claire Fraser for so long. The fans. She looked silently into the mirror and suppressed a small sob as she fixed the rest of her own hair. Sam hadn't finished when she got up and left the trailer quietly and without a word. He looked after her anxiously and thoughtfully, oblivious to the fact that he had unfamiliar hands halfway down his face. A smile, a small and heavy smile was on her face as she left and she tried to keep her composure. She always did. Pretending to be strong and trying to look professional, which she usually managed quite well, but...not today.

When Sam had finished, he stood up in a flash, like a horse just waiting to race to the starting line. He came out and looked around. There were other smaller trailers everywhere. It was already starting to get dark and the whole set was in an after-work mood. He took a deep breath and ran a hand through his hair. Sam walked slowly through the various crowds. Cait had been tense all day, then the photo for 'The Last Wrap'. She didn't have a single second to herself. He kept getting a hand slapped on his shoulder or back as a sign of excellent work and gratitude, but he hardly bothered to respond. Here and there a small nod of thanks and a smile as he meandered past the people.

He couldn't find her, not even in her trailer. He decided to go into the hall to the set and bumped into Sophie. "Have you seen Cait?" he asked her, unconsciously worried.

"Sam! Ah...yes, she was walking towards Lallybroch's set" she said, adding "Are you coming to the bar for drinks tonight too?"

He raised his hand in thanks and nodded, but left without saying anything to Sophie's astonishment.

"Okay?" she mumbled quietly, shrugging her shoulders as she left too.

A huge room with green and blue screens opened up to him as he entered. Parts of masonry could be seen. Lallybroch. The heart of the set. There she stood in the middle of the walls. He went to her and gave her space, standing a little apart behind her to enjoy the silence with her. It's so ironic, the usually loud hustle and bustle of the set during filming was stifled. You'd think no one had been here for centuries, as if only ghosts were wandering around. She didn't move, although she knew it was Sam standing with her. She could feel his aura very clearly, the same as every day. It could have been anyone, but she would recognize his from thousands.

He finally came a little closer to her, stood close behind her and followed her gaze across the huge set. She wiped her face, not turning an inch. She knew that if she did that now, the dam of her whole frame would break. The actually positive advantage of being able to let herself go with him and only him. But now she felt it was a weakness. She didn't want to cry, not over something so trivial. That's what she thought. Sam took a quiet breath and cleared his throat. He knows her and knows that it's better not to push her now. She'll come to him when she needs him, just like always.

"The others want to go partying, have a drink. Are you coming?" He asked carefully to give her room to breathe. "Of course!" she sounded completely normal as she turned to him. There it was, the smile that could have melted him, but... it had a bitter aftertaste. "Let's go, I want to freshen up quickly and then we can go," she said, playing relaxed. Yes...acting, but she can't do that to him. If anyone could keep their composure, it was Sam. Not Cait. She was Claire through and through when it came to interpreting emotions, she couldn't lie. In front of anyone else...but not in front of him.

He followed her to the trailer and didn't bother to wait outside. He didn't care what anyone else on the set thought. He had to stay with her now, make sure he was there at all times. After all these years, he just wanted to think about her and not worry about what others were saying or thinking about either of them. Cait looked at him in surprise for a moment, hesitantly closed the door and followed Sam with her gaze, who simply sat down on one of the small benches and stared out of the window. She paused briefly, then went to change her clothes and freshen up, only to stand in front of him ten minutes later, ready to go. He stood up and grinned at the sight of her. "You're far too pretty for tonight my dear" he said more proudly than jealously. She smiled sweetly at him and studied him silently for a moment, giving him a kiss on the cheek. It was breathy, almost apologetic, which was why he scanned her curiously.

"We should go before I change my mind mo chridhe" She giggled affectionately at his words and they both left the trailer.

When they arrived at the bar, they joined the others. There were quite a few of them. Sophie, Richard, Lauren, John and César were also there. When they arrived at the table, the others cheered them loudly, glasses were raised and everyone roared. Sam laughed contentedly, gently placed his hand on Caits back and took one of the whisky glasses to clink glasses. Cait gave Sophie a hug and took a glass too.

"Slainte!" the Scot called out loudly and everyone joined in. with one big draught, almost everyone drank the glass empty together while the music played loudly in the background. "So James Fraser!" said Sophie and continued with a smile. "Let you and your Sassenach celebrate hard today!"

His face lit up with joy and he raised his newly refilled whisky glass. "Not just me, but my wonderful partner Cait, as well as all of you!" They raised their glasses again, but at Sam's words, the Irishwoman stared at him silently for a moment, then drained her glass in one go, which Sam just looked at silently. They all talked about the wonderful memories of the last eleven years. Everyone had a lot to say, except Cait, who was quite silent. Had agreed here and there or made a quick comment. Richard was in his own world, having another drink.

As Cait poured herself her 5th glass, the Scot stopped her without thinking. "Ok, slow down babe the evening is still young" She looked at him in disbelief. He knows what her limit is, but she didn't really care at the moment. Fully focused on Cait, Sam didn't notice the looks from the others, which he had caught with her nickname.

Now it was Richard who interrupted the tension and drew the puzzled looks when he distracted the group with a question.

"Do you have any ideas or other projects for the future?" Everyone joined in and suggested ideas or said no, including Cait. "I'm sure it won't be easy to switch off Claire after all this time. But you have so much talent, you could play anything," Sophie said without thinking and received a serious look from the Irishwoman for this statement. Cait stood up and politely excused herself, all eyes fixed on her. Sam did the same and rose to follow her. She went out into the fresh air, breathing faster, doing her best not to lose her composure completely now. Sam came out to her and saw her pacing back and forth, slightly upset and with tears in her eyes. He stood there, still hesitating, he knew her.

"Do you want to go?" he asked calmly and she looked to him for help. That was the hint. He went to her, took her in his arms and simply held her tightly. "We're going..." he whispered softly and lovingly and she just nodded silently, hiding her face in his chest. Sam gave her time and gently hugged her tighter, then took her to his car. Thank God he only had two whiskies.

"I'll let the others know," came from him briefly and as quickly as he was in, he was out again. She sat quietly in the passenger seat, looking at him apologetically as he got behind the wheel. "You don't have to look like that, it's all right. The others are having fun without us," he said in his soft voice, but she looked out of the window briefly as he started the engine. "That's not it. I didn't want to ruin your evening," she said, again with an innocent look. Sam snorted in amusement. "Cait as long as I'm with you every night is saved" he spoke seriously and smiled sincerely at her. "I just need you mo chridhe"

She gave him a wistful smile, she was happy. He stroked her chin and smiled at her with his typical wide grin. "And now let's check into the hotel" he drove off, concentrating on the road and sensing that Cait was still tense.

When he arrived, he looked at her quietly.

"So Claire Fraser" he rolled the 'R' especially and started speaking in Jamie's accent. God she loved his Scottish accent, but it's exactly what her heart doesn't want to hear right now. Cait ignored him and fussed with her hair. "Ye cannae hold it in forever," he said, letting Jamie hang out in full conversational tone. "Stop it Sam, we're not on set anymore," she said annoyed and snappy. He raised his typical eyebrow and walked slowly towards her. "it winnae get any better if ye dinnae let it out...~Claire~!" He emphasized the name of her second life again and made zero effort to stop. She turned to him and scowled. "You're not Jamie!" she commanded rather than saying it. "hm.. nae?" he couldn't ask more Scottishly and grabbed her arm, gently but firmly. "Cait, we've lived these roles for eleven years, they're a part of us and they'll be a part of us forever!" he said sternly, not even thinking about locking the Jamie inside him away. "But it's over now, damn it!" she hissed and tried to pull away. He was beginning to feel like he was filming a scene on set with Claire rather than arguing with Cait herself. She finally clung to him as she gave up. She knew he was right... right from the beginning. But the painful thought that it's over forever is too great.

At last he had her where he wanted her. She could no longer hold back the tears and hid her face in his chest while he held her and stroked her head. The Scotsman gave her a gentle kiss on the head every now and then. It took a while before she finally calmed down. She swallowed it for too long and didn't let it out. Otherwise so tough, it's still not such an easy path. After all, it is the goal that has been irrevocably achieved.

Eleven years of hard work and so many memories. The fact that she had met and fallen in love with her husband there weighed deeply. He picked her up bridal style and carried her to the couch in the room. "It's okay my love...I'm so proud of you. You've done such a great job all these years" she laid her head on his lap. "That's what the right person says...without you, the show would only be half as good!" she said with charming sweet but tired smile and grabbed his chin with his slight beard stubble.

He returned her smile just as lovingly, leaned down and gave her a kiss on the lips. "It doesn't matter what the future holds for us, as long as we're together I don't care," he couldn't say it any sweeter and stroked her silky, dark hair lovingly. She just looked at him in love, the blush on her face full of happiness to have him with her.

"Do you want to watch something?" he asked and she nodded silently. Sam switched on the TV and pulled her closer to him. "My Sassenach," he said quietly and proudly.

"My red-haired, stubborn and hot-headed Highlander"

[heavypressure]

I'm very familiar with constipation, even week-long clogs are a usual occurrence to me. By the end of such week I'm already used to the heavy amount of waste and churning gases in my swollen guts, but it usually ends there with me finally being able to go to the bathroom and empty my bowels, my belly shrinking back to it's normal size. But not this time... I don't know what exactly caused it, but it's been 9 days since my last successful unloading.

I'm sitting in my cubicle at work, my thoughts fixated on my abnormally full middle. My belly looked 7 months pregnant at this point, so tightly packed with waste, gas and food that there was almost no movement inside. Surprisingly, it didn't hurt either so far, just heavy discomfort from all of the weight pulling my belly down, and extreme bloating that began from the fermenting waste deep in my lower intestines.

I gave up on buttoning up my pants a few days ago, forced to expose my lower belly, which was the most round and tight part so far Embarrassed, i decided that i need to take action, but was scared of taking laxatives right away, with blockage that big i was afraid i will literally burst..

I'm probably just not getting enough fiber, so I'm gonna fix it today, and this situation will be finally over!

I came home from work and started working on several smoothies and salads, making sure to add prunes to everything. I figured just one drink wouldn't be enough, so i needed to cram another big meal in my already overfilled stomach... Burping loudly, i chugged another prune smoothie, my poor guts stretching painfully this time. I moaned and rubbed my rock-hard belly, telling myself to hold on just a little bit more. After finishing my meal, i slowly waddled to the bed, exhausted from the painful stuffing, but hopeful that my plan will work.

I was awoken in the middle of the night by a dull pain in my guts. I opened my eyes, and was instantly horrified: my belly looked ready to burst, even rounder than it was before i went to bed, gas roaring loud inside my clogged guts and sending vibrations through my whole body... Well, it seems my fiber idea worked?...

I got up and a loud BBWOOUURRP was forced oit of my mouth uncontrollably, releasing just a tiniest bit of the pressure inside. I waddled to the bathroom and plopped on the toilet, gently rubbing my enormously stretched gut and observing the damage that was done to it over a week ... Oh god, i could see some stretch marks formed near my belly button, how embarrassing... But this is finally going to be over now,...right?

I sat on the toilet for over an hour, listening to my bubbling cauldron of a stomach, trying to push anything i could out, but .. nothing came out but a few tiny (but very rancid) farts... The bubbling soon stopped, and i was left with an even bigger stomach than i had before... Now i had all of the gas that formed from my huge fibre meal stuck inside of my intestines, unable to find it's way out and only bloating me further. I got up and immediately felt every single gas bubble inside, gas cramps shooting through my whole body... Great, i only made everything worse... I waddled to bed again, maybe my belly just needs more time?... Hopefully the next morning things will finally get going....

I woke up feeling like a blimp. Thankfully it seems my belly hasn't gotten any bigger, but it definitely hasn't gotten any smaller too. Over this night i managed to go from looking 7mo pregnant to looking slightly overdue. Thankfully the pain died down significantly, and the noises occured only if i made some sudden movements

Unfortunately i still had to go to work, abd there was no way I'd fit in my regular work trousers this time... I looked around for some old sweatpants, embarrassing and slobby choice, but still better than going out naked

I could feel the mass inside my belly jiggle and grumble with every step i took, but i hoped that maybe agitating my belly more would help it.

I was definitely getting some weird looks at work, some people asking what happened to me. I was too embarrassed to answer that I'm just overfilled with gas and shit, so i tried to change the topic and get back to work so the day would go by faster.

Even i was overwhelmingly full, i still felt intense hunger after not eating anything for the whole day at work.... I was thinking that maybe I shouldn't eat until i deal with my massive constipation, but thought that a small quick snack wouldn't hurt...

While eating a cheeseburger and washing it down with coke, i decided that i should finally try a laxative, no matter how much it scared me.

It was embarrassing, asking for the strongest laxative at the pharmacy, while my balloon of a gut was hanging out for all to see, probably telling the whole story.

I got home and downed several pills instantly, not even reading the instructions. I tried to relax while i waited for the laxative to work.

After an hour, it finally kicked in .. The intense bubbling in my stomach could be heard throughout the whole room, and i felt my guts inflating once more. I went to the bathroom,sat there and massaged my tight gut, letting out a few rancid burps and farts. This gave me hope, finally I'll be back to my normal self!.. I could feel the diarrhea bubbling with gas in my bowels, my stomach roaring with needing to be finally emptied... I pushed and pushed, but the enormous rock-hard log in my ass just wouldn't budge, only allowing for small farts to slip out... i was desperate, it can't be all in vain! I clutched my belly and continued to push, belly still bubbling with gas, but not getting any smaller..

After it seems like two hours with no results, the movement in my belly began to calm down , seemingly ending my chance to let anything out... I was exhausted, my distended middle only seeming even bigger than before... What can i do now?.. am i doomed to bloat and swell further and further?

I waddled to bed again, noticing that i got used to the gas pains, and it didn't bother me that much... My stomach was so swollen, but at the same time, i couldn't deny that it felt somewhat good... Feeling such heaviness, being inflated from the inside, with no way out of this predicament.

One thing that laxatives also do, is they make me really hungry. And i got a day off tomorrow, so ....

One month later....

--GHHHUUOORRRP - Day 29 of my week-off! It feels so good to relax at home, even though i soon need to get back to work.... somehow

Empty paper fast-food bags and wrappers cover the whole floor of my living room. I sit on the couch in the middle, but you can barely see me behind the huge sphere of flesh that's covered with sweat and stretch marks. By the look of an outie belly button, you can guess that this is what became of my belly... My sides are bulging with build-up gas, all that i can feel inside is immense pressure and heaviness from the weeks-worth of food that i crammed inside of my guts. My clothes are of course long gone by now...

Turns out, being constipated for month and a half isn't as bad as it seems to be ...

[midnighthazee]

Greenridge ABO Series

a/n: I don't know how often I'll post - shooting for a couple times a week (MWF). I'm trying to be quick caz I also hate waiting on the next part of what I'm reading. So I post as I write :) thanks for your support and patience!! Love you guys

Series Masterlist Masterlist

Warnings: angsty, explicit language, mentions of abuse/neglect, fear

WC: 3340

Chapter 4

“Minho… talk to me.” Chan insisted, coming down the stairs.

Minho plopped on the couch in the basement.

“What is it?”

Minho looked at his Alpha. 

Chan looked at him expectantly, making Minho groan.

“She’s my soulmate too.” he said, his voice barely audible.

Chan looked into his eyes, surprised. “You too?”

“At this point…it’s half the pack.” Minho threw his arms up as he fell back into the couch.

“So I guess this means you agree she should stay?” Chan smiled, his dimples showing as he poked at Minho playfully.

“Of course she’s staying. I’m not a monster.” Minho grumbled.

Chan looked at the stairs, hearing the doorbell.

“I hear Doc Quinn. She must be here to do a checkup.” Chan noted.

“This still doesn’t fix our problem. We can’t afford a fight against the Nyko pack.” Minho continued.

“I know. We will figure it out.” Chan said. 

Doctor Quinn, Felix, and you come down the stairs.

“Morning Chan. Morning Minho.” Doctor Quinn cheered.

“Morning.” Chan greeted warmly.

“Morning.” Minho mumbled, not bothering to turn around.

You three went into the med room.

“I’m going to eat.” Minho stood and jogged up the stairs to go get his plate.

Chan lingered a bit, hearing the conversation between you and Felix before he too went to get his breakfast.

“Y/n, I know it will take time, but I promise you, they are trustworthy. They will take care of you… the right way.” Doctor Quinn went on. “And I’m here for you too.”

You nod.

“Eat well, okay. And get plenty of rest. Soon you should feel normal. Or what normal should be.”

“Okay.” You say in a small voice, making her smile.

“I’ll ask you more questions next time. For now, just get acquainted with everyone.” She removed her gloves and gestured to the door. “You’re free.”

You looked at the open door, processing her words. Free. You were free? Tears filled your eyes and threatened to fall down your cheeks as you felt hopeful for the first time in a long time. You blinked back the tears, standing from the bed and stepping out of the room. Wanting some fresh air, you went out the double doors, inhaling the morning air as you fought back the tears. 

Could I truly be free?

“Hey…you okay?”

Your eyes pop open as you look at Felix standing before you. His brows were furrowed in worry. You nod but he doesn’t seem to believe you. But still, he doesn’t push you.

“How are you feeling? Tired? Hungry?” Felix questioned.

You shook your head.

“Do you want to watch tv or play some video games?”

You looked at him confused, never having done either of those things. 

“C’mon. We can pick something to watch together.”

Felix led you inside and upstairs. You noticed the kitchen was all clean, Minho putting the last of the dishes in the dishwasher. He looked up at you two and you were quick to look away. He clearly didn’t like you being here so you didn’t want to upset him further.

One of the boys was sitting on the couch watching tv already, remote in hand. He was also very handsome. His full cheeks and wavy hair drew you in, his smile was cute and contagious. 

His scent was different from Felix’s, which smelled of lavender and daisies, with a hint of eucalyptus. Han smelled like fresh cut grass and lemons, with a hint of gardenia. It was intoxicating and reminded you of a faint memory from your childhood - both their scents did. 

The memory was from one of the last days you had with your mother. You two had spent the day picking flowers in a field. There were all kinds of flowers and plants around you - daisies, lavender, roses, and gardenia. The gardenia smell was your favorite, but your mom loved the daisies. She said they were her favorite flower. Oh, how you missed her.

“Hey, wanna watch a movie?” Felix asked him.

“Sure. What movie?”

“I don’t know.” Felix sat down next to him, snatching the remote with a smile.

“Yah! Give it back.” He moved to get the remote back but Felix was too fast.

You jumped back at their interaction, not wanting to get in the crosshairs of their dispute. The two boys wrestled on the floor as Felix tried to keep hold of the remote. Minho suddenly walked into the room and towered over them with a glare. You shrunk against the window behind you, feeling his annoyance. They must have felt it too because they stopped and looked up at him.

“Best…behavior?” Minho spoke with gritted teeth.

“Sorry.” They mumbled in unison.

“We were just playing around.” Felix pouted.

“Pick a movie or go upstairs.” Minho left the room without even looking back at you.

“What’s got him so tense today?” Chubby cheeks asked.

Felix shrugged, noticing you standing by the window. “It’s okay. Come sit. This is Jisung.”

“Hi.” Jisung says with a smile and a wave.

You slowly come over and sit on the couch opposite of Jisung, Felix between you two. It was so comfy that you just sank right into it. Felix pulled up the movie list, throwing out some titles. You just shrugged, none of the titles sounding familiar. Eventually Felix decided on Harry Potter. 

“A classic,” he called it.

You only managed forty minutes of the movie before falling asleep on the couch next to them. At first they didn’t notice, but when Chan came into the kitchen and asked where you were, they looked over to see you laying down asleep.

Chan came over, not seeing you laying there from the kitchen, and smiled down at you. He grabbed a blanket from the basket at the edge of the fireplace and draped it over you. Felix and Jisung changed the channel to some soft music and headed upstairs so as not to disturb you. Chan went into his office to do some work, but not before pulling out his phone and taking a picture of you. You were too cute to resist.

“Well she’s definitely not dead…” Milo states.

They had searched all through the forest for your body.

“No shit. Obviously she got away. If she’s with the neighboring packs, Lewis is going to be furious.” Hayes runs his fingers through his hair.

“Wouldn’t the packs just give her back? We have agreements with them.”

“Did the cobalt get to your head or are you always this stupid.” 

Milo glares.

“The Greenridge pack is full of weak hybrids. They would probably nurse her back to health and hope she makes them stronger. The Okami pack fear us enough they probably would actually give her back to avoid issues.”

“So if she’s not dead, she’s with Greenridge.”

“Or Okami. Or Honshu. Omegas make hybrids do dumb things. You of all people should know this.”

“YAH! I was having fun. Same as you.”

“You crossed a line. I should have said no to the cobalt. Then she wouldn’t have gotten so disorientated and stepped off course.”

“I’m happy she did. Maybe she passed the cobalt along to the ones who tried to heal her and they got poisoned too.”

“I swear you get stupider everyday.” Hayes says.

Before Milo can pounce on his brother, the phone rings.

“Dammit. Don’t say a word.” Hayes says, answering the call. “Hey Lewis. How’s Montana and the Harlow pack?”

“They are good. We made a deal last night. I need you two to make sure the omegas are cleaned up, fed and not injured for the next few days. They need to be in their best shape. Especially my little y/n.”

“Why?”

“The Harlow pack has agreed to become our allies. Their support and numbers in exchange for an omega. Y/n is the weakest link so she should be a good one to pawn. So make sure she looks the best.”

“Okay. Yep, got it.” Hayes glared at Milo who was eavesdropping on the conversation.

“Everything alright there?”

“Everything’s great. Couldn’t be better.”

“You sure?”

“Yeah, I gotta go, the maids are just pulling up.”

“Okay. Have them give the omegas a little extra food.” 

“Will do.”

Hayes hung up. “We are so screwed.”

It was nearly two hours later when you began to wake. Blinking your eyes open, you noticed a figure sitting next to you. You pop up, pushing back into the couch cushions.

“Sorry. I didn’t mean to startle you.” he said in a sultry voice. 

This man was beautiful. Toned arms flexed as he adjusted how he was sitting so he could face you. His black hair was slightly wavy, his dark eyes fixed on you. He gave a small smile as you made eye contact and you swallowed, noticing the beauty mark he had under his eye. He was just staring at you like you were something to eat.

“I’m Hyunjin.” He smiled bigger.

“Y/n…” you whispered, looking down in your lap.

His eyes widened, not expecting you to talk since everyone said you didn’t. But he was quick to clear his throat, jumping for joy on the inside. “Nice to officially meet you.”

With that he stood, but hesitated, staring at you for a few moments before finally walking off. You watched after him, confused, but grateful for the space. Looking around the room, you didn’t see anyone. The tv was playing music and you wondered how long you had been asleep. 

You stood, walking down a hallway. There were pictures on the walls of the boys. A couple group ones, some in pairs. You smiled how much they clearly loved and cared for each other, wondering if that would ever be you. There was a cutout in the wall displaying a vase with fake Calla Lilies in it at the end of the hall. Turning you see two french doors. Approaching, you look behind you before continuing.

Upon opening the door, you step in and see an oversized desk with a computer on it. One wall is full of built-in bookcases, the other having floor to ceiling windows. There were two chairs facing the desk, a person sitting down in one. He was quick to turn around, staring at you.

The chair behind the desk spun around and revealed Chan on the phone. You should have knocked…or not been exploring at all. This wasn’t your house. 

You began to slowly back away, but Chan was quick to gesture you forward. You look back to the other person, realizing he also had an alpha scent. This slim cutie was the third alpha in this pack. He brushed his hair from his eyes, forcing a smile at you. You didn’t realize earlier how pretty his eyes were. Or how cute his smile was with his dimples.

You looked down, wanting to run far away. Why was everyone in this pack so unbelievably attractive?

Chan finished up his conversation, before smiling at you.

“How was your nap?”

You hesitated before deciding to speak. “Good.”

Chan’s eyes lit up, taken aback by your verbal answer, and smiled even bigger. Wow those dimples. “That’s great.”

He stood up, making the other alpha stand as well. You stiffened, instinctively stepping back.

“It’s alright. This is Jeongin. He is the youngest here and our newly presented alpha. So you’ll have to excuse him if he gets a bit uptight.” Chan says, resting a hand on Jeongin’s shoulder.

“I’m not uptight.” He groans, pushing his hand off.

Chan just laughs. “I have to go discuss some things with another pack. I’ll probably be gone the rest of the day. So if you need something, just ask anybody in the pack, okay?” 

You nod.

“Innie, would you like the honors of showing her to her room?” Chan asked.

You look up at him incredulously. 

“Sure.” Jeongin says.

“Room?” you echoed.

“Yes. You will have your own space. That way you can nest how you like. And you can personalize it however you want. If you don’t like the wall colors, we can change it. Want new furniture? We will replace it. Whatever you need for your nest, we can get, okay?”

You blink in disbelief, speechless. You didn’t know what he meant by nest but you didn’t say anything.

“Ready?” Jeongin asked, interrupting your thoughts.

You nod.

“See you later.” Chan smiled.

Jeongin led you back down the hall and upstairs. This was your first time up here and it was massive. There was a bit of loft space where a lot of junk as well as clothes were piled up.

“Laundry mess.” Jeongin noted. “This way.”

Jeongin led you down a hallway to the left and you saw a couple doors in the hallway. One of the doors had loud noises coming from behind it as well as two people arguing. You think one of them is Felix….if you can recognize his husky voice by now.

“They get too into their video games.” Jeongin said with an eyeroll.

You heard a door open and close behind you. Turning to see who it was, you saw the slim, gorgeous man from earlier. Starts with an H but you can’t remember.

“Innie… what are you doing?” he asked.

“Showing her to her room.” Jeongin answered.

“I think you’ll like it, y/n. It gets a lot of natural light and has calming colors in it. But if you want help painting it, I can help you.”

“Y/n? That’s your name?” Jeongin asked.

You nodded.

“How come you told Hyunjin first?” Jeongin pouted.

Hyunjin. That’s his name. 

“Because I’m special.” Hyunjin gloated.

You were quick to shake your head in defense. “No, I-”

You didn’t know what to say. He just happened to be there when you decided to start talking. It wasn’t favoritism.

“It’s fine. I see how it is.” Jeongin opened the last door on the left and walked in.

Your shoulders dropped, your feet not moving.

“He was just teasing. He’s not mad.” Hyunjin assured.

“Oh, I was only kidding y/n. Don’t be sad.” Jeongin was quick to come back to your side.

“We joke around and are sarcastic a lot. Don’t take us too seriously.” Hyunjin offered a smile.

You look to the room and begin to step inside. It was spacious and nicely decorated with neutral tones. The wood accent wall and ceiling were a soft tone, white sheets brightening up the room. Hyunjin was right, the windows let in tons of light. You had a spacious closet although it was empty right now since the only clothes you owned were shredded in the forest. You didn’t even know where they were but wouldn’t be surprised if they were thrown out.

“And over here is your bathroom. It’s a private bath, so you won’t have to share it with anyone.” Jeongin informed.

Walking into the bathroom, you were stunned. It was so clean and…and gorgeous. Worn shiplap walls, white tile in the shower and a vanity sink. This bathroom was a major upgrade from your hole in the floor of the cell.

“You like? Hopefully it’s not too much.” Jeongin’s brows furrowed in worry.

“It’s probably too much.” Hyunjin deadpanned, earning a glare from Jeongin.

“It’s….gorgeous.” You say.

“See, she likes it.” Jeongin pushed Hyunjin out the doorway as you all exited the bathroom.

“I’m hungry. Would you like something to eat, y/n” Hyunjin asked.

Eyes wide, you nod eagerly and they both giggle at you.

“Come on. We can make something to eat.”

“When you ever need space, you can come here. Okay?” Jeongin said.

You nod before following Hyunjin to the kitchen.

Hyunjin had made you both some ramen, yours less spicy as it was your first time. It was so yummy, you ate the whole bowl. He offered you more food, but you were full, your body not used to big meals. Han and Felix had come down to eat too, and asked if you wanted to finish the movie. You agreed and spent the rest of the afternoon watching the first two Harry Potter movies. 

Felix explained things as they happened, making sure you were understanding the world and what was going on. You felt yourself relaxing for the first time. You enjoyed the movies and got really invested in the story. Felix was happy you liked the movies, even running upstairs to get his computer and make you take the official test and get your house. (Just use whatever house you would like if you’re into Harry Potter)

After, Minho pulled Felix to help with dinner. The thought of eating again was daunting, you were still so full from your late lunch. Eating this much in one day was new to you but you didn’t want to be rude. 

Seungmin and Changbin came downstairs and joined you and Han on the couch. Han was watching an anime but you weren’t really paying attention. Instead you were staring at the two boys talking about the show with him. You didn’t realize earlier just how buff Changbin was. He was probably three times your size with his broad shoulders. It was a bit scary honestly…. The damage he could do if he treated you like the Nykos. Thankfully Hayes and Milo weren’t this buff. He then laughed about something and it was a really cute laugh. It made him seem softer and you found yourself smiling at it. 

Seungmin was also so, so attractive. You stared as he brushed the hair from his eyes and pointed at the screen. He rambled about something that was happening, but you just watched the way his lips moved as he spoke. His skin looked so soft - not that everyone else’s didn’t - but you wondered how it would feel under your fingers. He looked over at you and caught you staring, smiling back at you. You blushed, looking over at the tv.

“Dinner’s ready.” Minho called out after nearly an hour.

Everyone scrambled up and hurried into the kitchen. You watched from the couch as everyone grabbed their plates and filled them with food. You looked at Minho, watching as he swung the kitchen towel over his shoulder before kissing Han on the cheek and moving out of his way. You found yourself wishing he would do that to you, his lips looking so kissable. His pointy nose was so cute you wanted to kiss it too. He was insanely attractive and you felt such a pull to him. You wanted to trust him, to lean over and touch him. All of them. You wanted to fit in and belong in a pack so badly. Especially after seeing the way they all belong together.

The chemistry they all had was undeniable. It’s like they had spent their whole lives together. You wondered how they came together. How they managed to not get overthrown by Alpha Lewis.

“Not going to eat?” It was Minho. 

He was standing right in front of you. You were too in your thoughts watching everyone you didn’t notice him approach. Now he was actually talking to you. Doesn’t he hate you?

He came around the couch and reached for your hand. “Come on. You need to eat.” 

He wrapped his fingers around your hand before you could pull away and gently tugged. You stood, letting him lead you into the kitchen. The others stopped and stared, making you look down. You weren’t going to go against what the Alpha wanted so you let him hold your hand as he grabbed a plate for you. 

Everyone else resumed what they were doing and moved to the dining table. Seungmin put some food on the plate Minho held for you - smaller portions since he knows you can’t eat much - and then Minho led you to the table. He sat you on the end next to the head chair where he had his plate.

“Enjoy.” He said to you, a ghost of a smile just barely touching his lips before he began to eat.

TAGLIST:

@estella-novella @lxvxchxrlxttxbxrsx22-blog @butterflydemons @readr1221 @gaby105-skz @notevenheretbh1 @bah2004 @sinfulfic @just-a-blackthorn-cookie @dreamerwasfound @bowsnbang

Shout out to my beta for inspiring, motivating, and pushing me! @its-the-solar-system

[respectthepetty]

The Loyal Pin - Episode 14

I was going to save this episode for last in my Sunday watching like I normally do, but if I'm going to be mad at Pin, I need to get it out of the way, so let me get this point out of the way as well - - -

WHAT IS PIN EVEN SAYING?!

If she thinks marrying a horrible man is her karma for breaking Anin's heart, you know what actually fix that? NOT MARRYING THAT MAN! Pin gives her reasons: she can't embarrass the family and taint their reputation, but like . . . SHE NEVER HAD TO MAKE THIS DECISION IN THIS FIRST PLACE! Anin doesn't give two fucks about anybody but her, and Pin is thinking about everyone else. She is saying she must now live in hell because she did make this decision, but she isn't the only one in hell because she damned both her and Anin to this sentence. Just because I understand her whys doesn't mean I have to like, and I. Don't. Like. It!

And to make me more upset is Pin being pressed about every girl who has been SUPPORTING Anin even though Anin has been a loyal Blue Beauty to Pin SINCE DAY ONE as if Pin ISN'T GETTING MARRIED IN A WEEK! My babygirl is too beautiful and too perfect to be dealing with this.

And that's why Penelope has no color!

I pray that I see Anin in pink by the end of this story, but right now, I'm proud of her for maintaining her color throughout all of this.

AND HER PETTINESS!

Because, in this house, I respect the petty!

Anin understands the importance of a queer community and my beautiful and perfect babygirl is helping her in her time of need just like Anin has helped her.

Yet Penelope is over there just looking miserable and colorless. Once again, I understand her, but what does she want Anin to do? Help her plan her wedding? Redecorate her bedroom, so her future husband will be comfortable in it?! I WANT ANSWERS, PENELOPE!

Of course this cabrón sucks. We've done been knowing that.

Anin ran IN HEELS to get that man, and if a woman is running in heels, you know that shit is serious. GET HIS ASS, POSH SPICE!

Anan sits at the table with To Sir, With Love's Yang as the best brother to ever exist in a QL because, unlike Anon, he does not trust Kuea because his ass IS NEVER AT WORK, which has been pointed out several times.

And he trusts what my girl Prik is saying about this very important matter because Prik has proven to be elite in getting information! Prik isn't a simple gossip. She is a chismosa and that takes skills.

This motherf*cker.

Not even seeing Pin in her and Anin's colors is making me happy right now. Anin's mom is in red, and the sight of Patricia is pissing me off that I'm seeing more red, so let's get back to murdering Kuea.

And this is what I mean by skills! Prik understands how to treat herself and how to make small talk! She doesn't look suspicious like rich chick Anin. No! She easily got the information and a snack by merely asking where that hot guy was today.

And even though Anin said "Yes, ma'am" slightly irritated when Prik told her to move, Anin better appreciate that without Prik's excellent talent, she wouldn't have known any of this. Prik didn't even have a car! She was just walking around and getting the chisme. The royals could NEVER!

THIS MOTHERF*CKER!

Girl, no! Just like Penelope, I get her reasoning, but this man done lied to you a million times. Your baby deserves better!

PATRICIA! I HATE YOU!

And now I am back where I started. Penelope believes Anin but will stay with Kuea because . . . reasons.

Anin is probably trying to figure out why she loves this pendeja so damn much. Girl, why we love the people we love just doesn't make sense sometimes. This is one of those times.

My Mexican grandmother is coming out in me because all I keep thinking is Penelope better be drinking lots of water if she wants to keep crying all these tears.

Prik telling Penelope that Anin left with Aon, then telling Penelope to smile shouldn't come across as Prik being loyal to Anin, but if I was Prik, I would get my digs in where I could too. I'm not romanticizing being poor, but that big bed in that big house ain't worth it, girl. Anin wanted YOU!

And now this is where my feelings get hurt by the colors, and I start singing Adele.

"WE COULD'VE HAD IT ALL, ROLLING IN THE DEEP!"

"NEVER MIND, I'LL FIND SOMEONE LIKE YOU! I WISH NOTHING BUT THE BEST FOR YOU!"

THIS MOTHERFUCKER!

Anan, get up right now and smack your bother. My beautiful and perfect babygirl is right next to him and she will help you. Start a fight, so the wedding gets postponed.

I FUCKING HATE THIS!

Whew! That was an amazing hour of television. Blessed to be alive the same time this is airing.

[c-l-y-d-e]

ALRIGHT. For the last two-ish months I've been working my way through the entirety of Supernatural's 15 seasons.

(For context: I'd seen Seasons 1 to 9ish back when they were airing, so those were fun to revisit, and then the last third of the series was fresh territory although I was more or less aware of the main plot beats and additions to the cast. (I was of course present for the collective meltdown of November 5th through to the finale, though I'd never watched more than clips/gifs of that))

SO. Having just finished Season 15, I gotta say, I feel hollow inside :') Like, I know the pandemic impacted things, but wow, way to fumble every aspect of the conclusion for every single character??? Not just Cas going to turbohell and then being wholly ignored/forgotten aside from a "yeah he's in heaven somewhere". But like, DEAN? Who'd struggled with depression and suicidal tendencies and the solution was... a shitty death??? That for all his fighting against fate was exactly the dark, unhopeful ending he'd said he'd get since the start of the series?? And I think I get what they were trying to give Sam but holy shit did he look miserable and unfulfilled with his "normal" life. Like, for all their fighting to SAVE PEOPLE and despite the bazillion loopholes they canonically have, this was the time they said "bummer, RIP", WHAT THE—

Ok, I'm not going to hash out all my thoughts here (god, I don't even know where to start), BUT!!

I am primed for Season 15 fix-it fics. So help a girl out, and hook me up with links to your faves. PLEASE. CURE ME.

(Looking for: Destiel end-game. Long fics preferred, but love a life-changing hard-hitting one-shot. I can handle any rating. Desperately need SANITY and RESOLUTION and HOPE (I love you, angst with a happy ending!!).

[httpvomitello]

I Am Fine *⁠.⁠✧

request: continuation of the younger sister O'neil. Because she started hanging out with the turtles, she completely neglected her studies. She completely stopped listening to her older sister, and the only person she would listen to was the turtle.

previous - I Can Explain

Life with the turtles was… addictive. Every day brought something new: meditate with Leo, getting in on Donnie’s experiments, joining Mikey’s endless games, and even finding ways to keep up with Raph's intense workouts. It was a thrill, a life packed with excitement, and it was a million times more interesting than school.

But all that time with them had definitely come at a cost. You couldn’t remember the last time you cracked open a textbook. Your grades had slipped so much that you were practically skating on thin ice. But honestly? You’d convinced yourself it didn’t matter. How could it, compared to everything you were learning from the turtles?

Of course, April noticed. She’d been pretty lenient at first—probably just happy you had friends, even if they were her ex pets, and now are mutants, crime-fighting friends. But lately, she’d been giving you these worried looks, her brow furrowed when she saw your bag full of assignments you hadn’t even touched. You knew she was getting frustrated. April was always the responsible one, the straight-A student, the career-driven older sister.

One night, you were back at the lair, lounging on one of Donnie’s makeshift bean bags with a half-eaten pizza slice, and all of a sudden, Raph tossed a basketball at you.

“You’ve been lookin’ distracted all week. What’s got ya so spaced out?” he asked, his tone suspicious.

You shrugged, not wanting to admit it was your sister on your mind. “It’s just… April’s been on my case again. She’s always nagging me to do schoolwork and stop coming here so much.”

Leo raised an eyebrow, glancing up from where he’d been cleaning his katanas. “Well, it is pretty important. You don’t want to fall too behind, right?”

You rolled your eyes, groaning. “Not you too, Leo! You don’t get it—April just wants me to be her mini version. Go to college, get a ‘normal’ job… I mean, is that even me?”

Donnie’s ears perked up, and he spun around the sofa, looking genuinely intrigued. “Have you told April how you feel? Maybe she’s just worried you’re pushing everything aside.”

“Yeah, because she doesn’t get it,” you snapped, more annoyed than you meant to be. “She’s the one who’s always talking about ‘having a plan’ and being all serious.”

Raph snickered, crossing his arms. “Sounds like you’re havin’ a rough time. Maybe a round in the dojo will clear your head, yeah?”

You smirked, ready to take him up on it, but then the sound of footsteps echoed through the lair. You all turned to see April standing there, her expression a mix of frustration and concern. How long had she been listening?

The lair fell silent as April walked in, her gaze fixed on you.

“Can I talk to you for a minute?” she said, her voice even but firm.

Great. She looked like she was in full “big sister mode,” and there was no way out of it. You followed her over to the side, trying to look as disinterested as possible. The turtles stayed nearby, pretending not to listen but obviously hanging onto every word.

April crossed her arms, looking down at you. “Do you know how worried I’ve been? Your teachers have been calling, saying you haven’t been turning in assignments or showing up to classes. You’re letting everything go because you’d rather be down here...”

You scoffed. “What am I supposed to do? Sit in some boring class that doesn’t mean anything?”

She let out a frustrated sigh, rubbing her temples. “You’re not even listening to me, are you?”

“Maybe because you’re not listening to me, either,” you shot back. “You just want me to be like you!”

April’s eyes softened, her anger fading to something closer to hurt. “That’s not what I want. I just don’t want you throwing away your future. I know these guys mean a lot to you, but that doesn’t mean you have to let everything else go.”

Before you could respond, Leo stepped in, looking between the two of you. “April’s got a point,” he said gently. “I know we’re… kind of addictive.” He smiled a bit, looking around at his brothers. “But that doesn’t mean you can’t have balance. The whole point of what we do is to make things better, right? For you, too.”

Donnie joined in, giving you a small, understanding smile. “We all… respect that you’ve become such a big part of our lives. But if you’re pushing away your own life, well, maybe we’re not doing the best job supporting you.”

You felt a pang of guilt. The last thing you wanted was to disappoint them—or April. You glanced at her, seeing how worried she really was, the way her shoulders sagged a little, her brow furrowed.

“Fine,” you muttered, finally relenting. “I’ll… try to focus more. But can you guys… help?”

Raph shrugged, smirking. “I’m no tutor, but I can definitely help keep ya in line. Just don’t expect me to read any of those giant textbooks.”

“Yeah!” Mikey chimed in, grinning. “I’m awesome at moral support! And I can help you with any history assignments. I know all about ancient weaponry.” He mimed twirling nunchucks and winked.

April’s expression softened, her shoulders relaxing a bit. “Look, I get that school’s not the most exciting thing in the world. But it’s about making sure you have options. This whole life we’ve got here… it’s not easy.”

You met her gaze, something in her tone making you see her point. The turtles’ lives, their mission, was full of danger and sacrifice. And they wanted better for you, even if they’d never come out and said it.

Leo nodded, putting a hand on your shoulder. “We don’t want to see you lose out on the chance to build your own path. And that starts with taking school a little more seriously.”

Sighing, you gave a small smile. “Alright, I get it. I’ll try to catch up on my assignments. But I’m still hanging out with you guys.”

April rolled her eyes, but she looked relieved. “I’m not asking you to give that up. Just… promise me you’ll work on the other stuff, too?”

With a nod, you gave her a quick, awkward hug. “Yeah, I promise.”

“Good,” she said, smiling softly. “Because we’re all here for you, okay?”

Over the next few weeks, the turtles became your unofficial study buddies. Leo kept you on a schedule, making sure you actually finished assignments. Donnie helped you with science projects and math, explaining things in his own way that actually made sense. Mikey found a way to make everything into a game, keeping things light and fun. And Raph was always there to remind you to stay focused, giving you tough love and encouragement whenever you tried to slack off.

Slowly, you got back on track. You even started to enjoy it a little, seeing how much better you felt when you balanced things. And April? She was right there, cheering you on.

One night, after you’d finished a massive assignment, April found you in the lair, sprawled on the couch with Mikey and Donnie debating something ridiculous. She walked over, a warm smile on her face.

“See? I knew you could handle it,” she said, ruffling your hair.

You rolled your eyes but couldn’t help smiling. “Yeah, yeah. I guess you were right. But don’t go getting a big head about it.”

[voxblade]

Rant under the cut. It's past my bedtime so it's probably not my best work but I have. Thoughts.

It's been a hot minute since I binged this show so if I misremember or get little details wrong, I apologize in advance.

God they had potential. Basic? Sure. But Haida's crush in the earlier episodes was so cute. It's hard to watch season 1 and not root for the guy, as he flounders awkwardly trying to impress her or get close while Retsuko's too caught up in her own problems to notice at all. He's a decent dude doing his best. Season 1 Haida comes with the advantage of even acting fairly mature about his feelings, too. When Retsuko dates another guy, after all his years of pining? Haida gets upset, yeah, but he acknowledges it's his own fault for being too slow to speak his heart, and doesn't take it out on anyone but himself. Even when he does confess to Retsuko at the end, he acknowledges that he doesn't know the real her at all... but would like to. Goober! Precious bean. Ahh, etc. etc.. Of course, Retsuko, politely, rejected Haida's confession at the end season 1. She clearly wasn't interested, and goes on to say as much multiple times over the show and in the episodes to follow. In a normal situation, Haida should've learned to realize he and Retsuko weren't gonna work, let go, and move on. It sucks, but it's a healthy lesson to learn. Sometimes the person you think is your true love just... won't click. Instead of fixating forever, you owe that person and yourself the freedom to live. If they left things like this, I still might've quietly shipped it on the side anyhow, with the full knowledge and support of canon's message.

But no!!!! The narrative refuses to let Haida do anything but pine, even when it'd be healthier for him to, EVEN WHEN RETSUKO HAS MADE IT CLEAR SHE JUST SEES HIM AS A COWORKER. The writers kept pulling the stupid "will they, won't they" card. This isn't getting to the stalking, the light two-timing shit he pulls between Retsuko and Inui, but I won't let go of the karaoke scene at the end of season 3 where Haida (not a licensed therapist, not even a close friend) fucking. Goes to Retsuko's room, drags her out of her house and taunts her out of the trauma she got fROM ALMOST BEING STABBED TO DEATH by calling her a fucking chicken so she can go back to work. Why was he at her house? Well. You see. Because on an experimental dating app, it scored Haida and Retsuko as soul mates. So clearly that meant it needed to be him to help her.

Yeah.

He's deemed the most worthy person to confront her because of a DATING APP ALGORITHM. AN APP THAT WASN'T EVEN PUBLIC YET, IF I FUCKING RECALL. I stress, Retsuko and Haida are barely even work friends at this point and she had a network of other friends and sHE WAS ALMOST STABBED TO DEATH-

"but, she needed the push or she'd lose her job!" Her mental health recovery was more important than preserving the show's status quo! Even if she lost her job, do people think it's impossible for her to oh I don't know. Apply somewhere else when she healed?! Yes the job market sucks, but employment isn't impossible!!! She had security living with her parents in the meantime, she wasn't doomed. And even so, it doesn't change that rushing to fix a problem as major as ptsd for shipping fuel with a guy she's been lukewarm towards at best up to this point is still sloppy writing!

And the narrative rewards him!!!!

And there's that whole clusterfuck in season 4 where Retsuko is FINALLY willing to give Haida a chance, having been worn down enough to consider. But Haida. Haida sabotages himself on purpose. And romanticizes his own fuck ups. I can't.

I never finished season 5 but their chemistry felt flat even when they finally got together officially. Too little too late.

It never feels like Retsuko is with Haida because she chose to be, y'know? It feels like everyone around her sorta pressured her into it. Fenneko, Haida himself, Tadano's app, etc.. Idk. It's so sad they leave a bad taste in my mouth now. I love you, season 1 Rethaida. Season 2 Rethaida is soured a bit. Season 3 and on is a big no from me.

Do you ship it?

[stfu-im-thinking-abt-blorbo]

Game Devs force Local Artist to make their Agent OC come out of self-imposed retirement and design a prosthetic arm for them against their will. More at 8.

Bro is NOT happy.

[nomairuins]

i like overthink everything now it makes me feel so dumb. i used 2 be able to just talk 2 ppl but nowadays every single thing im like Is that actually going to make them hate me. Yes probably. and then i just dont respond which makes ppl hate me. this is how it is

[bludraws094]

love it when a characters just A Guy but either

is being dragged into Weird Shenanigans against their will

exists in a world where being just A Guy is considered weird as fuck

first is like "im gonna do my taxes" "no <3 fuck you <3 <3"

second is like "im gonna do my taxes" "what the FUCK are taxes"

anyways tag your blorbos idc. also when i say just A Guy i mean "normal person who wants to live a normal life". not like. the epitome of a suburban dad or office worker. im Exaggerating for the purpose of being Silly and Goofy

[socksandbuttons]

In the "a day in the life of eclipse" it wasn't the first time Solar's Moon treated him badly. Remember when Lunar first showed up in Solar's dimension, Solar told Moon that there's a dimensional traveler and he'll deal with it. And his Moon responded with "good because I don't care!" it looks like his Moon has been aggressive/treated him badly to him from the start. Sorry, I just didn't understand what you meant by you ignoring the lore from a day in the life of eclipse because it is part of the lore now

You're new on my blog which i frequently ignore things in my headcanons from time to time. And that canon changes from how its interpreted. Anyway, stems from Solar's explaining his moons situation. The lore SLIGHTLY changed. In terms of Moon, being slightly Glitched due to killcodes removal/memory loss. He never mentioned Moon being mean before that (at least not on the terms before he left his dimension). Not unlike things to be slightly aggressive from Moon tho, just it wasnt PERCIEVED moon was a jerk to Solar UNTIL Solar reveals this later on (after Lunars death). They didn't really develop his story until later a little more. So I'm sticking to my previous headcanon of Moon having a glitch, which is canon to s degree? SOLAR himself has mentioned he wanted to fix his MOON AND SUN. Which was forgotten/changed and turned into just sun then into Solar leaving forever.

[butnotbubblegum]

using the tags to vent my current emotional state into the void bc ig story feels like a bad plan for this, read at your own risk.

[dimiclaudeblaigan]

I really hate the inconsistencies that exist just to make SB (and CF technically) work, but also how hard Petra basically simps for Edelgard to the point it deconstructs aspects of her character.

In Houses she mentions her siblings being in danger if she died, but in SB she just doesn't even make any mention of them in this situation. She's just willing to possibly die all of a sudden for someone who never actually treated Brigid like its people were independent (which she could've done at literally any time from the moment she became emperor). She was relatively vocally I guess you could say "good" to Petra, but the way the writing handles Petra's response to all of it feels like Petra's just been brainwashed.

Petra says she would always choose survival and makes a point to emphasis that, but in SB she's completely and carelessly willing to risk her life and possibly throw it away... for Edelgard? Who still has not actually officially freed Brigid? And if Petra were to stop being Edelgard's ally?

"Reconsideration". Because Brigid was never freed and now they're not going to be as long as Edelgard is in charge, because their queen is no longer bending to her will and fighting for her. If she was ever truly planning to free Brigid, Petra's decision alone not to fight for her shouldn't have changed that fact (especially since she supposedly gives her the choice in Houses to fight for her or not, and on non CF routes she does this by sending a letter, to which Petra refuses).

It should, of course, be obvious with this that everything is very not hunky dory between Adrestia and Brigid, but then...

...eh wot hooligans???

I mean sure, if you considered forced vassalage to be "peace" and not being a free people "peace" then sure. But like... it's not a peace her people want and she should know that, but the game tends to do this back and forth with this topic. I hate it though because it makes it come across as being forced into submission and not having the means to fight back is "peace".

I know this game has lots of issues with uh, if you're attacked or if you were defeated by another military force you should submit and be happy about being taken over, and when you can't fight back anymore that's "peace" because nobody's fighting... but uhh... why is that only an issue with the Empire? I mean, we know why - the devs wanted to walk with her and they admitted it! But like... they should still know when they're writing something reeeeally icky.

Duscur doesn't have this problem and they're not under Edelgard's foot. Anything under Edelgard's foot though is treated like they should be thankful for her control and/or invasion(s). That just overall sends a really nasty message. I don't know that the devs meant to do that as far as an Empire, but I do think it's because they went a little hard with the Edelgard bias and somehow forgot what it would look like to an audience playing the game.

It's like they know it's not a good thing but they keep pushing the "Brigid isn't actually free but it's still peace because nobody is fighting" narrative.

Like... I don't care how much you love a character you're writing. You can't tell me that oppressed nations would just call oppressions "peace" or that their leaders would be more than happy to fight and die for the leader of the nation oppressing them. It gets even worse when you get into the racial territory of it, but that's a topic I've already covered so I'm not gonna go over it again here.