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xo2dee · 3 days ago

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NOW LOADING. .

DMC MASTERLIST

AMBROSIAL

PAIRING: Vergil x (Fem)Reader WARNINGS: Slight sexual tension sooo MDNI/18+ only. WORD COUNT: 4676 SUMMARY: He didn't even like strawberries. He just liked to piss you off.

A/N: first ever fic i ever posted on ao3 which is nuts. vergil brainrot never dies.

If you were to look back on yourself years ago, the thought of your current position in life sounded preposterous. A fairy-tale, fantasy even. Who in their right mind would take up demon-slaying as their primary job?

You, apparently.

Four years beforehand was the beginning: you had set out, armed with a baseball bat as ghoulish creatures had raided your hometown. You were a newbie, so incredibly under-prepared, and came out of that fight wounded and traumatized, but ultimately victorious. It was a start, no one was ever perfect as a beginner, you made mistakes, but weeks later you made your mind up and decided you wanted to kill these monsters for they did to your home and all those people. After all, it was the least you could in honor of their memory and for your guilt in surviving.

You could remember the ache in your back from being hunched over your computer looking up workout routines, the pain of ice-filled baths to relieve your soreness from pulling muscles after strenuous workouts and fights, and the scars on your body throbbing from one too many near-fatal fights with demons. You were human, painfully human, you had realized that particular notion after nearly breaking your hand socking a demon in the jaw. It was then that you realized you couldn't fight hand-to-hand combat with some demons (why did you even try anyway?) and you needed a weapon, one that was not a baseball or an axe that was on its last life. You needed a gun.

There you met her. Nico.

Two and a half years into your self-employment, Nico came speeding into your life. Literally, she almost ran you over.

You had to explain yourself that no, you were not a demon, you were just a carrying carcass because it was a good alternate to weight-lifting because you didn't have any weights. She had looked at you like you were stupid, eyes squinting and cigarette ash falling from the smoke in-between her lips and onto the road before asking, "You a demon hunter?"

Well, you didn't necessary call yourself that, but, whatever, you told her yes.

Nico grinned after that and introduced herself, telling you that you were lucky for her bumping into you. You wouldn't necessarily call that 'bumping into you' and how you were lucky from almost being flattened like a cartoon character on the side of the road? You had not one clue, but you took her word for it in the end.

Through her you met Nero, a young man – you had believed he was an old man at first because of his hair, to which he got fussy about while Nico was hysterical in the background – and learned that he too was a demon hunter, a rather good one at that; miles better than you. Of course, the glowing claw-tipped arm told you there was more to him than you knew, but you didn't push it, not when he convinced Nico to make you a weapon so you didn't look like a Neanderthal running around with a wooden baseball beating demons with it.

"It'll cost ya, I don't just do handouts," she had told you, blowing cigarette smoke into your face. A test you presumed.

Nero looked ready to interject at that, but you spoke up before another loud argument broke out while fanning away the smoke.

"I'll pay you anything you want."

Nero looked at you like you had just sold your soul – you probably did – while Nico smiled and stubbed her cigarette out with the tip of her boot. "I always knew I liked you."

She had made you a bayonet, a gorgeous onyx one held that objective affection towards. You had thanked her, giving a hefty amount of cash and practically skipped off ready to use your new baby. However, you were not a good shot since you almost shot Nero in the head – more times than you would like to admit.

That's when you met him. Dante, the Legendary Demon Hunter – though he didn't like to go by that, Nico called him that albeit never even meeting the man. And your teacher you guessed, not like he did any teaching standing off to the side occasionally throwing jokes at you and trying to hold his laughter back when you missed a target by a couple of feet. But still, he meant well.

Nero had practically held you by your scruff in front of Dante like some lost puppy and told him everything he knew about you, up to how shitty of a shooter you were, but were able to wrestle demons down in a fight. The aged man scratched the scruff adorning his chin and looked you up and down before sighing.

"Okay, but I can't pay ya."

What was with these people and money? Dante didn't pay you, and Nico would sometimes charge out the ass. Of course, you later learned Dante didn't pay you not because he was Eugene Krabs incarnate, but because he literally had no money and was in debt. You wondered if he even paid taxes.

(Though coming to find out Dante's true agenda behind being in debt – aside from the mountainous supply of pizza and booze he spent it on – you didn't bring it up, opting to keep your thoughts and mouth to yourself and just taking your duct of the pay from Morrison, Lady or Trish when you had the chance.)

Your 'demon hunter' status was well-off after that, you had teammates – meeting your favorites: Lady and Trish – your skills only increased, and you were basically employed at Devil May Cry. Life was fine until a giant fucking tree sprouted out of the ground in Red Grave City, and it was your hometown incident all over again. Dante, Lady, and Trish had went missing in May of that year leaving you with Nico and Nero, as well as the odd new member V, and his talking pet demon Griffon. You did not converse with him that well, he was quiet and you appreciated that since you often had to hear Nero and Nico's arguments, or worse, Dante's and Lady's. Still, you remained polite to him as long as he was to you, perhaps that's why you felt a little melancholic when he never returned after leaving with Dante and Nero that one time only a month after knowing him. Maybe you were sad at the thought that he died, given Nero and Nico had made a companion out of him and you were feeling sympathetic for them.

Then again, maybe you were sad for Nero since his father was apparently V, but was not V, ripped his arm off, was the reason behind the Qliphoth, fought his own father, then watched as his father and his uncle jumped into Hell to stop the roots from the tree from spreading any further out of the city. You had blinked when he relayed it all to Nico and you, astonished he seemed happier. You supposed it was understandable, he had found out that he did have family left (sometimes you had wondered if Dante was his father given the striking similarities and the relationship between them) and his arm... grew back. You didn't question it when you watched him later on pull out an old book with a V engraved on the front and flip through the pages with a ghost of small smile on his lips. If Nero was content, then all your complaints dissolved.

You weren't exactly so content cleaning up someone else's mess, but you reminded yourself that you wished someone had done it for you back then. As well having Morrison technically being your boss for the time being, you had to listen to him and take jobs from him.

It was months later when Dante came back, appearing in the middle of Devil May Cry through a random portal. You expected nothing less from someone like him, yet you still remained apprehensive scowling at the azure rift breaking reality. Out of it sooner than you expected came Dante, swaggering while looking like he never wanted to do it again and –

Who was that?

"Babe! Didn't expect to see you here, you been keeping the place clean for me?" Dante started out, walking towards you with his arms spread. It almost looked like he was going in for a hug, yet you knew Dante wasn't exactly the type for physical contact and your expression probably wasn't the most welcoming then. You didn't know if it was from your frazzled mask or him just being him, but he stopped mere feet away from you, holding up his hands in mock surrender as you regarded, "Relax, it's just me and Verg."

'Verg'. Vergil. It was him, Nero's father and Dante's elder twin. It was the first time you had laid eyes on him, though you listened to him and untensed. You took that time to not so discreetly take in the new face in front of you.

And boy, was he a sight.

The genes that ran in the family of Sparda must've been something other-worldly (literally). You can see the similarities in the twins: their hair the same shade, yet they both opted for a different approach on how they styled it with nearly the same type of face structure and same color in their eyes – however a different type of glint and feeling in them. They were of the same height, yet it looked like the eldest was a tad taller and you weren't too sure if it was due to his hair perhaps the boots he was wearing. Their choice of wear completely differed too, much in the sense of the colors they wore and the amount of skin they were willing to show; whereas Dante donned a regular Henley shirt with the beginnings of his chest exposed, his brother dressed himself completely covered in an odd vest, you didn't know where he had gotten, with the zipper all the way up to his chin with the only skin showing being his face and parts of his hands and fingers. Other than that, they seemed to like the leather pants combo too and it was easy to tell they were brothers.

You didn't miss Dante's red coat, and Vergil's blue one.

Truly the same blood, but completely different people.

You were still staring at him, perhaps like a little too long than you would've liked to have admitted, but you were having trouble wrapping your brain around the fact you were in the presence of the man that ripped your friend's arm who was also his dad, who also caused Qliphoth rising and then jumped into Hell and was back with his brother, who seemed to have settled that... 'difference' he had with him enough to bring him back to Devil May Cry...

You stared, mastering a poker face through years of being alone.

He stood rigidly in the middle of the room as if he was a statue, a white-knuckled grip on his sword with stiff shoulders as he eyed the room warily before landing on you. He looked down at you with a furrowed brow and a scowl like you were bug he was ready to step on. His presence was so... icy compared to Dante feeling so warm. They truly were polar opposites; the Red Oni and the Blue Oni. As you stared the more handsome he got and you could see how he was able to father a child – a child who looked so much like him, it was uncanny. Then he opened his mouth.

"What are you looking at?”

Why were you not surprised?

You did not like him. His voice fit him perfectly; so cold, and just so Vergil. It was slightly nasally and not like the husky tones of Dante's, but you knew his voice could instill fear into grown men and anyone else. However, you were not swayed, instead overcome with the backhand of his attitude.

Dante put up a hand before you could open your mouth and fire off a retort. Vergil wasn't even asking, it felt more like a demand to know why you were blatantly ogling him. You didn't answer, only throwing back an attitude with a tsk! and whipping your head around from his smartass. He didn't retaliate, stepping away from the scene and dismissing you like you were still nothing more than little bug underneath his boot. You had watched him walk away, glaring at the back of his head through the sides of your eyes. Dante, meanwhile, only laughed patting your shoulder looking a little too happy.

"I think you'll get along just great."

You did not get along 'just great'.

After that, it was a series of events...

Once you decided to be courteous for Dante and take his laundry with yours, to which Vergil all but dumped his dirty ass clothes on you as well. Literally, he just dropped them in your arms and you had struggled to catch them (why did you anyway?).

You had glared, fingers gripping the insanely nice fabric of his coat as he stood but two feet away from you, "Why should I?"

Vergil had the nerve to look down at you again, features as stunning as ever in the low light of the shop and his expression betraying nothing but that stoic exterior he was known for, yet you saw a minimal raise to one of his eyebrows, "Are you not offering?"

"I'm offering Dante."

"Then your common courtesy is a lie?"

He really had a retort for everything, didn't he? You scowled at him and pinched his coat between your fingers, "That's rich coming from you... but sure," you stuffed it down into the basket, balling it up extra measure to piss him off, "Anything for you, your Highnass."

You didn't give him time to reply, walking out with as much dignity as you could knowing you had given in and were going to do his laundry. Though he didn't know you kept his coat longer in the dryer to absorb as much static as it could, and you balled it up again to get as many wrinkles as you could in it.

(You were sure he knew though, if that Stanley Kubrick stare you got returning it was anything to abide by.)

As you left, you could hear Dante sigh.

"Have you ever heard of please? And have you ever actually talked to a woman before?"

There was another time you were just standing next to him, then suddenly your cheek was squished up against his bicep and body nearly compressed under his weight as he slammed you both into a nearby wall. You didn't think that perhaps he was shielding you from the rampant rage of a demon, more annoyed with the fact your bruised nose was getting the horribly intoxicating scent of his cologne, or whatever it was, and you could feel the disturbing way his lean body molded into your own.

"...Vergil."

All you got was a slight tilt of his head.

"Get your big ass off of me."

That got you the frosty glare you had been waiting for, the silvery tint in his eyes not something you were unfamiliar with or afraid to look into it. Vergil regarded you for but a few short moments, eyes darting around every inch of your face before quietly speaking, "I expected a thanks, not an insult for saving your frail self."

'Frail'? Whatever, you weren't about to argue with him thinking you were a dainty daffodil. He had eventually lifted off of you after you vouched out you had to pee because he was pressing on your bladder, the man looking – dare you say it – embarrassed over it as well.

Afterwards, it was another of Dante’s input.

“I need you to tell me how you had Nero, because this is just sad.”

It was a constant back and forth, though the times you randomly turned around and Vergil was just glaring at you nearly looking like he wanted to combust were the oddest of his vampire-like behavior. You figured perhaps he was plotting your demise, though it started getting weird whenever you turned around and he was inches from your face.

You didn’t like to think too hard about those.

Whether it was awkward van rides with you staring at him seeing if you could piss him off, him taking away a demon kill from you at the last second, you 'forgetting' to wash his laundry, him spreading out on the couch in the world's biggest man-spread so you had no place to sit, it was a constant back and forth. Or perhaps it was present time with the matter at hands.

Kyrie had brought her famous strawberry pie because she knew it was your favorite, and you had stashed the piece in the fridge for later time only for the next current day it to be gone. You confronted Dante about the matter ready to scold him when he you he hadn’t been around to even know you had any (and pouted you didn’t share), and then suggested Vergil did it. You didn't believe it, sure you two had... whatever going on, but you knew that as half-demons the twins did not have to eat human food; Dante only did so to keep in touch with his human side and probably because he missed his mother's cooking at times. Vergil, however, you never saw eat once, practically wrinkling and up-turning his nose whenever Dante brought back pizza or strawberry sundaes, so you assumed it had been Dante who ate your beloved pie and didn't want to admit to not hear your nagging.

Though Dante had listened to your reasoning and told you something that surprised you given Vergil's... tastes.

"True, he doesn't like strawberry-flavored things. I think he likes chocolate."

Of course he liked chocolate, perhaps bitter and dark like him.

Vergil would not eat your pie.

Or so you thought until he and you were sitting across from each other at Devil May Cry at that moment. When you caught his eye, you watched morbidly curious as he bore his silvery eyes into yours and ran his thumb across his plump bottom lip until you could see the crumb of red he purposefully left for you to see. He ate it. He ate your fucking pie out of sheer pettiness.

He didn't even like strawberries. He just liked to piss you off.

(Didn't your mother tell you that boys picking on you meant they liked you?

Still... you didn't think that applied to forty-year old half-demons with stick up their asses.)

You could not stand him, you hated him and his handsome face and his stupid lips. You don't know how many times you envisioned stepping on his stupid coat and watching him trip and fall flat on his face, or just tackling him into the ground in a fury, or just fighting him, or just kissing him –

You swallowed at that last thought, raising your gaze from his titled lips to lidded eyes. Teasing.

You never had a problem with looking him dead in the eye before, yet there was something brewing in-between that nearly had you sweating as you looked at him then. Since when where you shy?

Looking at Vergil then though... you weren't sure if you wanted to body slam him... or kiss him. Or both in that order.

So you did. You don't know what possessed you, whether it was his expression taunting you or the overwhelming urge to get rid of whatever the feeling was inside you, you shot up determined, marched over and tackled him into the couch. It was not necessarily a body slam like you wanted, but the giddy feeling you got watching his eyes widening a fraction and that barely concealed grunt he let out when you straddled him and pushed him down into the cushions was worth it. You felt yourself grow embarrassed at that point and uneasy as well. Vergil not throwing you across the room was one thing, but being able to straddle him and have him on his back was another thing altogether. Still, planting a kiss on those lips...

"Why are you making that face?" he asked once you finally looked him in the eye. He look unamused at a first glance, but close enough something was dancing in his pupils.

You knew you were embarrassed from the heat you felt on your cheeks. What face were you making? Did you look constipated? Whatever, you pushed it away and tightened your thighs against his waist and gripped his shoulders harder, reveling in watching his eyes flick downwards for a mere moment. You inhaled, hoping your voice didn't come out as unsteady as your body and mind felt.

"You ate my pie."

"All this over a slice of a dessert."

"You did it on purpose because you knew it was mine."

"I didn't see your name on it."

"You don't even like strawberries."

"And how would you know that?"

"Because."

"As I said, perhaps you should leave your name on things if they are yours."

"That's rich coming from the one who has their initial on their own little diary."

Vergil's eyes narrowed, "That 'diary' is a book of poetry, not that your narrow-minded self would know anything about." That hit a nerve.

"I want my pie, you ass."

"How am I supposed to give you 'your pie' if I have already ate it?"

Why did he look so smug? You trailed your eyes from his long lashes, to the slope of his nose, to his prominent cupid's bow before finally landing on his lips. You remembered the crumb he swiped away realizing he had only ate the pie just prior beforehand, he purposefully took it out of the fridge and let it sit until he knew you would be back and he ate it just before you returned, He ate it just to see you squirm. The sneaky, plotting, petty, handsome bastard...

You attention was roused back to him when he spoke again, saying your name, "I asked you a question: How are you supposed to get your pie if I have already ate it?" Vergil had caught you staring at his lips you realized. He was staring at yours now and unabashedly rolling his eyes down your body. It was an inquiry, wondering if you were going to do it. If you had the gall to. He knew what thoughts were brewing in your mind just by the look in your eyes and the flux in your body temperature. You made up your mind then, scooting up to sit on his abdomen and slapping your hands on either side of his face. You wanted your pie, so you were going to get a taste of it at least.

"Fine."

Your spine bending awkwardly at that angle reminded you once again the times you spent hunched over your computer, but the dull ache didn't compare to what Vergil's lips felt like. They were partly chapped, but you didn't mind, not when he was already opening his mouth for an invitation for you to get a taste. So you did just that, pushing your tongue through to explore his mouth for the fruitiness of your lost pie. He did taste like Kyrie's famous strawberry pie, but somehow it tasted better once it was on his tongue. He made a noise underneath you and maneuvered his hands to touch you, one gripping your hip fingers digging into your shirt and the other curled around the back of your neck to pull you further into him. You felt dreamy melting into him and moving your lips along his, you only failed to realize how incredibly sloppy your kissing was when Vergil pulled your neck back to speak against your lips.

"You are atrocious at that." Well, you can tell now given the saliva glistening on his lips. "Are you trying to devour me?"

You hummed, pushing your body down to lay atop his, "I don't think you can talk big when you don't know how to kiss either."

"Mmmm," you've never heard that noise before and it sent a flutter straight to your lower abdomen. Vergil moved the hand resting at the back of your neck, brushing fingers across your cheek to grip your face tilting forward until your lips touched again.

Compared to you basically drooling into his mouth in a needy make-out session, the kiss he left on you was chaste and so longing. It felt sweet. You wanted more as molded his lips onto your top lip, leaving you at the expense of his buxom bottom lip. You had wanted this so bad and all you could do was grip the lapels of his coat and drown yourself into Vergil's kiss. It was over far too soon than you wanted, which was why you chased after him when he parted away from you looking all too pleased with himself again. "I don't know how to kiss, yet here you are chasing after me again whining for another."

You groaned and hid your face in his chest again knowing that he had won. Again.

Vergil: 6

You: 2

Not that you ever won against his wittiness in the first place. Yet this time you felt you had won something big.

Vergil did have a son, so maybe you were wrong about his skills in kissing.

The moment was interrupted when the doors to the shop busted open and the owner waltzed in acting like he wasn't outside the door listening.

"OH – whoops, didn't realize you two were busy canoodling," Dante's tone sounded all too amused as he covered his eyes with hand, yet created a space in his fingers so he could peak at you both, "I'll just be on my way. Give you some privacy. Be safe though we don't need a repeat "

"Dante."

You had shot up back into a sitting position on Vergil when Dante burst into the shop, hoping to show the red-wearing twin that no, you two were not doing what he thought and almost countered saying you were both just wrestling, but that sounded even worse somehow. Vergil had hissed out his name sending a scathing side-eye towards his brother and you prayed they didn't breakout into another 'argument'. 'Arguments' being full-blown fights, whether it be with swords or just throwing hands at each other over the stupidest reasons. You had walked into their fights on more than one occasion, always giving a dry look towards them when Dante would usually explain that Vergil got mad he called his hair ugly or something. You almost rolled your eyes again, Grown ass men.

Dante held up his hands, one hand holding a pizza box, "Okay, sheesh, don't get your panties in a bunch, Verg. You should be worrying about hers."

"Leave us!"

The remaining effort it took for him to leave was the blue spectral sword that he ducked for before laughing and disappearing upstairs. You watched the summoning sword pierce the wall before dragging your eyes back to Vergil, who was already looking at you. "You're both annoying."

He glowered again, "You are infuriating and a maddening being. A witch."

"That's a new one. Are you saying I bewitched the mighty Vergil."

"Hardly."

"Okay, Verg."

His eye twitched at the crude nickname before pulling you back down onto him by your elbows, you had a clear message of what he wanted by the way his eyes were half-lidded and hands ghosting over your back.

You gave him a cheeky grin basking in the satisfaction of his brow twitching in annoyance at it, "You trying swap spit again?"

"You are disgusting."

You hardly took the insult to heart when his lips slowly pressed against yours again and you sighed dreamily into his mouth.

You suppose you could forgive him for the pie if you got that in return.

#{🩸} nee fics #vergil x reader #vergil devil may cry #vergil dmc #vergil x you #vergil x y/n #dmc #devil may cry #vergil #dmc x reader

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daphnedauphinoise · 9 months ago

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Weightlifting and Correct Forms

Pre-workout dynamic strecthing

Warm-up and mobility routine

Beginner's guide to weightlifting

Proper forms and common mistakes

Weightlifting for beginners women [fixed weights]

Learn how to deadlift

Lifting for beginners [bar squats]

Using proper technique for lifting weights

20 common lifting mistakes to avoid

Most common exercises done wrong [home edition]

Proper form for RDL

Proper form for Bulgarian split squat

Proper form for dumbbell lateral raise

Proper form for dumbbell row

Pure Gym's full exercise demonstration playlist

#to read later #daphne resources

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insomniac4000 · 5 months ago

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George Clarke was not your average gym-goer. Sure, he showed up four times a week, right on schedule, but it wasn’t because he was obsessed with bulking up or shredding down. That was just a bonus, the gym was more of a sanctuary for George—a place where he could clear his mind, focus on something tangible, and take a break from the relentless cycle of creating content.

Life as a TikTok and Youtube star had its perks, of course. George loved the excitement, the creativity, and most of all, the connection he felt with his fans. But there was an intensity to it that sometimes left him feeling drained. That’s why he cherished his time at the gym. Here, among the rows of dumbbells and treadmills, he could just be George, a guy trying to stay in shape and enjoy his workouts.

He had his routine down to a science. Mondays were for chest and triceps, Tuesdays for back and biceps, Thursdays for legs, and Fridays for shoulders and abs. He’d plug in his earbuds, crank up his favourite playlist, and get to work. The repetition was comforting, and over time, he’d come to recognize the regulars the same faces appearing day after day, each of them absorbed in their own world.

One face, however, had started to catch his eye more than the others.

She was new, or at least new to George. He first noticed her one chilly November morning, about three months ago. She had wandered into the gym with an air of confidence that suggested she wasn’t a beginner, but George had never seen her before. Dressed in sleek black leggings and a simple tank top, her hair tied back in a high ponytail, she moved through her routine with a focus that George admired. She was strong, no doubt about that. He watched as she effortlessly hoisted weights feeling comfortable while doing so and was engrossed in her routine, not bothered about anyone else at the gym, just like George.

It wasn’t just her strength that caught George’s attention. It was her smile, which she offered to the staff at the front desk as she checked in each morning. It was the way she seemed to tune out the rest of the world when she was lifting or on the treadmill, completely immersed in the moment. It was the way she caught him looking once, their eyes meeting for a split second before she looked away, a faint blush colouring her cheeks.

George didn’t know her name. She didn’t seem to be on social media, or if she was, he hadn’t been able to find her. But there was something about her that intrigued him, a mystery that he wanted to solve. He started timing his workouts to coincide with hers, subtly shifting his schedule so that he’d be there when she was. He didn’t want to come off as creepy or overly interested, but he couldn’t help himself. He was drawn to her in a way he couldn’t quite explain.

It was a rainy Thursday afternoon when fate finally intervened. George had just finished his third set of squats and was about to move on to lunges when he noticed her struggling with the leg press machine. She had loaded the plates onto the machine but seemed to be having trouble with the lever that locked it into place.

Without thinking, George walked over. “Hey, do you need some help with that?”

She looked up, surprised, and George felt his heart skip a beat. Her eyes were a deep, warm brown, and up close, he could see the faint freckles that dotted her nose and cheeks. She was even more beautiful than he had realised, George often joked he was incapable of speaking to women and he could feel his heart thumping as the adrenaline flowed through him.

“Um, yeah, actually,” she said, her voice soft but steady. “I think this thing is stuck.”

George leaned down and gave the lever a firm tug. It clicked into place easily, and he stepped back with a grin. “There you go. All set.”

She smiled, a little sheepishly. “Thanks. I’m usually fine with this stuff, but today it just wasn’t cooperating.”

“No problem,” George said. He was about to walk away when she spoke again.

“I’m Emily, by the way.”

He turned back, surprised. “George,” he said, holding out his hand.

She took it, and for a brief moment, George felt a spark of something more than just a handshake. “Nice to meet you, George,” Emily said, her smile widening.

“Likewise,” George replied, feeling a little awkward but thrilled all the same. “Do you come here often?” He then mentally kicked himself for asking such a stupid question.

Emily chuckled. “Sounds like a line, but yes, I try to come most days. You?”

“Yeah, same here. It’s kind of my escape, you know?”

“I totally get that,” she said, her expression softening. “I work in marketing, and sometimes I just need to get out of my head. The gym helps.”

“Same,” George said, though he didn’t elaborate on his career. Most people either knew who he was or they didn’t, and he found it refreshing when they didn’t.

They talked a bit longer, mostly about their favourite workouts and the best times to hit the gym when it wasn’t crowded. It was a light, easy conversation, and when they finally parted ways, George felt a warmth in his chest that had nothing to do with his workout.

Over the next few weeks, George and Emily started to see more of each other at the gym. They’d exchange smiles or brief conversations between sets, and gradually, those moments turned into longer chats. George learned that Emily had moved to the city a few months ago for a new job, which explained why he hadn’t seen her before. She was originally from a small town up north, and she missed the quiet but was enjoying the excitement of the city.

“I didn’t know anyone here at first,” Emily confessed one day as they were cooling down after a workout. “But the gym kind of became my place, you know? It’s nice to see familiar faces, even if we don’t always talk.”

George nodded, understanding exactly what she meant. “Yeah, I felt the same way when I first moved here. The gym was where I found my rhythm. Plus my housemates are idiots so it's good to get away,” he joked.

They started meeting up outside the gym, too. It started innocently enough coffee after a workout, a smoothie on the way home. But soon, George found himself looking forward to those moments with Emily as much as he did his actual workouts. She was easy to talk to, funny, and grounded in a way that George found incredibly appealing.

And she didn’t seem to know who he was.

This was perhaps the most surprising thing of all. George was so used to being recognized everywhere he went, his online persona preceding him. But Emily seemed blissfully unaware of his TikTok fame. She treated him like just another guy, a guy she was getting to know, not a social media star.

It was a breath of fresh air.

It was a crisp winter evening when things began to change. George and Emily had just finished a particularly grueling workout as George was now training for a race for charity and were walking out of the gym together, their breath forming small clouds in the cold air.

“Want to grab dinner?” George asked, trying to keep his tone casual. “There’s this great Thai place just down the street.”

Emily hesitated for a moment, and George felt his heart drop. But then she smiled. “Sure, that sounds great.”

Dinner was wonderful, full of laughter and easy conversation. George found himself opening up to Emily in a way he hadn’t with anyone in a long time. He told her about his life, his family, and his love for creating content, though he still didn’t mention the extent of his online presence. Emily talked about her work, her friends back home, and her dreams of traveling the world someday.

As they walked back to their cars, George felt a nervous flutter in his stomach. This wasn’t just a casual friendship anymore—at least, not for him. He was falling for her, hard and fast, and he didn’t know what to do about it.

“So, Emily,” he began, his voice a little shaky. “There’s something I need to tell you.”

Emily looked up at him, her expression curious. “What is it?”

George took a deep breath. “I—well, I’ve really enjoyed getting to know you these past few weeks. And I guess what I’m trying to say is, I think I’m starting to like you. A lot.” There was a pause, and for a moment, George’s heart pounded so loudly in his ears that he thought she might hear it. But then Emily smiled, and George felt a wave of relief.

“I like you too, George,” she said softly. “I was hoping you’d say something, because I’ve been feeling the same way.”

George couldn’t help the grin that spread across his face. “Really? That’s—that’s amazing.”

“But,” Emily continued, a hint of uncertainty in her voice, “there’s something I should tell you too.”

George’s smile faltered. “What is it?”

Emily took a deep breath, just as he had done moments before. “I know who you are, George. I’ve known for a while now. My friends sent me your TikToks ages ago, and I recognized you the first day I saw you at the gym.”

George was stunned into silence. “You—you knew?”

Emily nodded, her eyes searching his for a reaction. “I didn’t say anything because, honestly, I just wanted to get to know you as you. Not as ‘George Clarkeey, the guy on TikTok.’ And I’m glad I did, because the George I’ve gotten to know is incredible.”

George felt a rush of emotions—relief, happiness, and something else, something deeper. He reached out and took Emily’s hand, squeezing it gently.

“Thank you for that, Emily. It means more to me than you know. I wanted to be just me around you too, not the guy everyone sees online.”

"I think I would have been drawn to you anyway, famous or not because no one can resist you doing a squat," Emily giggled.

They stood there for a moment, the world around them fading away as they looked at each other. It felt like the start of something real, something that went beyond the likes and comments of the digital world. George had found someone who saw him for who he truly was, and that was worth more than all the fame in the world.

The days that followed were a blur of excitement for George. His relationship with Emily grew stronger with each passing day. They started spending more time together, not just at the gym but outside of it too. They explored the city, tried out new restaurants, and even spent quiet evenings at George’s place, where they could just be themselves.

For the first time in a long time, George felt truly content. He still loved making content and connecting with his fans, but now he had something—or rather, someone—who made his offline life just as fulfilling. Emily was becoming his confidante, his support system, and more importantly, his partner.

One evening, as they were watching a movie on George’s couch, Emily turned to him, a playful smile on her lips. “So, when do I get to make a cameo in one of your TikToks?”

George laughed, wrapping his arm around her shoulders. “Whenever you want. But only if you’re sure you’re ready for the spotlight.”

“I think I can handle it,” she teased, snuggling closer to him. “But no pressure. I’m happy just being part of your real life.”

George kissed the top of her head, feeling a warmth spread through him. “You’re already the best part of it.”

And as they sat there, wrapped up in each other, George realized just how lucky he was. He had found something rare and beautiful—something that made all the hard work, all the late nights and early mornings, completely worth it.

He had found love, not in the flashy world of social media, but in the quiet, unassuming moments of real life. And he knew that, no matter what the future held, he and Emily would face it together, one set at a time.

#george clarkey #george clarke #george clarke x reader

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liesmyth · 8 months ago

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do you have any tips/resources for a beginner who wants to get into weightlifting?

thank you for asking!! I love this question. I love lifting! It's Good For You (helps increase bone density & metabolic rate, and it's good for injury prevention and developing functional strength). It's also a really great confidence boost. 10/10 would rec lifting to every single person reading this — if it's an option for you, give it a try.

TLDR: familarise yourself with common exercises. pick a beginner program. follow it. profit!

A more involved answer, with resources and details, is under the cut

familiarise yourself with common exercises

There are hundreds of possible exercises out there to target each specific body part. However, most of those are what's called "accessory" movements, as opposed to "basic" exercises that will pop up over and over in most lifting routines. Ideally, you want to know how to perform these movements, using light weights or just your bodyweight until you feel comfortable with it.

CORE BRACING (ft deadbugs. genuinely lifechanging skill!)

Squats.

Hip hinge. This is useful for deadlifts, romanian deadlifts, kettlebell swings & similar movements

Push movements (for example: dumbell chest press, shoulder press etc)

Pull movements (dumbell rows & many others)

That said. Please don't stress too much over "good form". Each exercise has infinite variations and especially as a beginner, you won't be lifting heavy enough weights to make form optimisation a big concern. All bodies are different and our individual stances vary a lot depending on body proportions, flexibility levels etc. You just want to know HOW an exercise is supposed to be performed, in terms of: which muscles it activates? what am I supposed to get out of it? how to do it safely? Your bodyweight squat doesn't have to be flawless, it just has to be good enough.

BTW, you know when I said that there are hundreds of possible exercises out there? Here is a very detailed masterlist + exercise guide for exercises impacting each muscle group.

learn your way around a weight room, if you aren't familiar with it already.

Broadly speaking: the free weights (bar, dumbells, kettlebells) are good for compound exercises that involve multiple muscle groups. The various machines are ideal for "isolation" exercises that target fewer specific muscle groups.

If you already know what's what, then skip this bit! But I've talked to many people who feel a bit intimidated by the weight room because they feel out of place in it, and in my experience familiarising yourself with the general layout is a good way to take away that discomfort.

And, in case this is something you need to hear: you deserve to be there, you're not taking space, and most gymgoers just want to finish their workout and shower, and won't pay specific negative attention to you. Most gyms have a weight room manager or floor trainer, at least during some shifts, and they WILL be happy to help you. If you're someone who doesn't want to be bothered while exercising, just preventively introduce yourself, say you're new

pick a program

I highkey recommend following a pre-made program instead of just fucking about on your own. Here's why

programs are well-balanced in terms of volume and muscle groups, to ensure you don't overtrain one body part and leave other lagging

they have a built-in "progression scheme" that will allow you to move to a higher weight in an optimal way — basically, you'll see strength advantages sooner

they help navigate information overload. There is SO much information about fitness out there that acts as an entry barrier. Following a pre-made program really helps with that.

If you have a gym membership, you may have the option of one "free workout program" made by a trainer who works at the gym. If that's in the cards, I'd recommend going with that.

Otherwise, I strongly recommend the "programs rec guide" over at r/xxfitness, the female fitness subreddit (the name is 15 years old but it's a queer friendly, trans inclusive space). I haven't personally done any of those, but Meg Gallagher of Before the Barbell is very solid, and that's the one I'd suggest.

get ready for DOMS

Also known as delayed onset muscle soreness. It happens 1) when you go to the gym after a while or start exercising for the first time 2) when you train a different muscle group than usual 3) when you up the intensity of a workout.

Basically, you wake up in the morning and you go OUCH!! ACHEY. That's DOMS. It happens because your muscle fibres are suffering microtears and reknitting (stronker!!) and you will feel very stiff and possibly very swollen (muscles retain water).

It'll take a few days for it to go away. IT IS SAFE TO EXERCISE THROUGH DOMS; the only thing limiting you is if you're too achy to move effectively. I recommend eating something protein heavy (more on that below) and doing some gentle exercise to make it go away faster (walking, at home-stretches or yoga, swimming if it's an option, etc.)

You DON'T want to stay in bed the whole time, because that'll only make you more stiff and make it last longer. Note that "post exercise achiness" is something that WILL go away after the first couple of weeks or so, depending on your recovery (again, gentle exercise and/or going to the gym again when you're still a bit achey is actually preferred than being completely at rest until they're fully gone away). Long term, you're NOT supposed to feel high-level soreness after working out. "No pain no gain" is mostly bullshit.

evaluate your program!

I'm always saying this, but the best exercise is the one you actually stick with. If your exercise plan is dull or fills you with dread, it doesn't matter how good for you it supposedly is — ditch it. Give yourself a few weeks of whatever program you pick, then re-evaluate: what are your favourite exercises you've done so far? Which ones you don't like? What would you like to do? Programs can and should be modified according to your preferences, and it's a lot easier to customise something that works for YOU once you're a bit more familiar with everything. For example, maybe someone at your gym is doing kettlebell swings and you think it's cool and you'd rather do those instead of crunches for your abs. Why not. Just note down what's working and what isn't, and then re-evaluate (with gym trainers if that's an option, but also, I mean it, HMU whenever).

odds and ends!!

None of these things are a big deal, but they make your life easier:

Hydrate during a workout. If you're hydrated your body works better. You'll also probably sweat during your workout. Getting through 1L of water during a 1 hour / 1 hour and a half gym session is perfectly normal.

Warm up before lifting. Something like this for a general body warmup + lighter warm-up series before going up to the weight you actually want to lift. For example: if you're squatting the bar (20kg) I'd do one bodyweight squats series, and another series holding a 10kg kettlebell or dumbell. Cool down or stretch after!

Mobility work on a day off is a good idea, even if you're no longer suffering through soreness. This is my current go-to routine, I do it about 2x week.

If possible, eat protein the evening / day after a workout. Protein is great for building muscle, and you WILL see a noticeable difference in energy level and speed of recovery by upping your protein intake. Basically: if you usually eat lentils or fish twice a week, try to make one of those times your post-gym dinner.

(In general, as a beginner you WILL see results regardless, and you don't need to optimise nutrition or anything (not to mention, it can be overwhelming / complicated to deal with.) But if you're interested in the specifics of nutrition & exercise, HMU)

keep track of your workouts! I really recommend this; it can be very inspiring to have a backlog you can look at when you want to track your progress, and you want to establish a benchmark with yourself. It can be as simple as writing down gym days & numbers in your journal if you have one; personally I use the Strong app to save my routines, and every week when I log in new workouts I modify the values depending on what weight and # of reps I hit that week. For reference, this is what a week looks like on the Strong app for me

IF I'VE MISSED ANYTHING SHOOT ME AN ASK.

#Anonymous #ask #jockposting #weight lifting #fitblr

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multiwreckedmess · 1 year ago

Text

Kinktober - Day 2

Prompt: Titfucking Pairing: Changbin x fem!reader WC: 1,980 Summary: After the gym Changbin is worked up and needs help to relieve himself.

This is a work of fiction, it does not represent Changbin or any Stray Kids member. On top of this it is an 18+ work. For my comfort and boundaries please if you are under age do not interact with this.

Additional TW/CW below the cut.

TW/CW: Changbin is a bit of a pervert, one use of “babe” directed towards reader, assumed larger chest, lots of talk about breasts, titfucking, no penetration, sweat as lube, spit as lube, finishing on chest.

Gym pump. Changbin had heard of it. Guys getting their “pump” on he thought was just the code for the naturally hulkier appearance of a well worked muscle. He’d not considered that pump could mean other things. It didn’t cross his mind that when his blood “pumped” through at an increased rate, spreading all those endorphins far and wide, that it would spread literally to every extremity, including his cock. It was kind of cool actually, looking down after a particularly grueling session and seeing his slightly swollen member just a little more prominently bulging in his gym shorts.

It wasn’t a huge hassle until you joined the gym. A small family owned gym like the one he frequented didn’t often get new members. It wasn’t flashy like the higher end gyms, nor cheap like the chains. It was niche and he loved that. You also loved that. Chain gyms were intimidating, harsh fluorescent lights with rows and rows of cardio equipment peppered with some weight training. High end gyms were no better, mostly used as a social club for the wealthy to network and find dates. While the atmosphere was nicer, the people were not. So you gritted your teeth and spent the money at the small independent gym near work.

9PM, your usual start time, give or take a few minutes. Your tits slightly spilling over you just barely too small sports bra caught his eye every time. It was like you walked tits first through the door, bright pink and bouncing as you marched yourself to the bay of lockers to store your gym bag. It drove him insane. Imagining how soft and pliable you would be in his arms pushed him harder on his last reps, grunting and gasping damn near erotically. However instead of heading immediately to your usual treadmill you stretch in a small alcove before waving at Changbin. He damn near slams the plates of the overhead rower against each other. “Sorry,” you smile, hands folded neatly behind your back. “I normally wouldn’t ask but, no one else is here and I need someone to spot me.” “Spot you?” Changbin’s brows raise. “You don’t lift weights.” He blurts. Now it’s your turn for a questioning look. Changbin wants to wither and die, what a fucking stupid thing to say. Either now you know he’s been watching you and knows your routine or think he’s a sexist prick. “Yeah err, I heard adding weight lifting and growing muscle can help with weight loss so I thought…well. I don’t know. Should I not lift?” Shaking his head and closing his eyes, Changbin looks you up and down. “I’m sorry. I phrased it wrong. You can lift weights if you want to!” “No, I know, I need someone to spot me. Can you?” You stare at him from under your eyebrows. For fear of saying something even more stupid Changbin nods enthusiastically and stands to follow you to the bench. How he thought he would be able to handle this angle of you is beyond him. But it was true, he was the only one in the gym who could help you and he wasn’t going to let you down.

Staring down at you, watching the bar come closer to your chest, back arched slightly from the bench. If he just racked the fucking bar and yanked you to him he could easily fuck your throat with abandon. But he really shouldn’t think like that. He should focus on the speed and frequency of your lifts. They’re calculated and measured, a beginner watching their forum, analyzing each movement, hesitant. “You’ve got it, two more for the set.” Changbin says firmly and quietly. “Just two more.” His quiet confidence in you makes you proud, emotions high from the tension in your arms. You grit your teeth and smile as you push your last two reps. “I was planning on doing two more sets. Just need to complete my circuit in the meantime, do you mind if I find you again? For spotting?” Voice sweetly lilting to appeal to him, he agrees with a silent smirk and nod.

You don’t ask him every time. Changbin doesn’t want to admit he feels a certain way about it. He was your first spotter, should’ve been your only spotter. No one else should be watching you as intently as him. It’s not that he’s possessive, it’s that he’s concerned. Or at least he tells himself this is the reason for his continued light surveillance. It’s almost a month before he talks to you again. Working himself to almost complete failure he can’t take it anymore. Eyes locked on you as you rerack your weights he needs to say something to you. Anything to you to make it clear that he’s friendly and approachable and wants to help. “Your chest…presses are coming along…” he tries to casually glance and nod. A quick observation to let you know he cares about your progress. Glace flitting down to your hot pink sports bra, casually of course. He makes you nervous, muttering a quick “oh…thanks. Can’t have the girls get saggy,” as you avoid eye contact. Knowledgeable and handsome, you want to impress him. “Must be heavy.” The words slip out of his mouth before he can stop them, eyes still marveling at your chest. “What?” “Oh sorry,” he shifts awkwardly. His knuckles press into his hardening cock, trying to make it look like he was simply massaging his quad. “My brain doesn’t think so clearly after a workout. Just blurts stuff out. Don’t mind me I’m normally…” “No, I mean they are heavy. If you want to, you could lift them! Like, for exercise….” You try to joke, cunt pulsing with faint hope. “Might help with your problem.” Changbin pretends to consider your offer, counting to five as he inhales, trying to keep himself from screaming enthusiastically. “Problem? I don’t have a problem.” Both of your eyes flit down to the outline in his shorts and back to each other. “Sorry I just…” you mutter, heat of embarrassment pricking the tips of your ears. “I’m going to-” you start gesturing towards your usual treadmill in the corner window to escape from the entire incident. Even your lower half starts to turn, separate from your head, still bowed in apology, eyes to the floor.

“Stop her, stop her now,” the thought clouds Changbin’s vision, “stop her this is it, you have to.” His hand catches your shoulder, halting your step, he thinks his heart may stop as well. A tiny yip of shock bubbles from your lips. His grip is strong, stance solid, he plants you with him, unable to shake free even if you wanted to. You didn’t want to shake free. “No, you’re right,” his eyes dart around the large space. The two of you basically the only people there. “If you want to help, I’d appreciate it. A lot. Before I have to leave.” You blink. Stuttering incoherent vowels you follow him as he wordlessly turns and heads to an unmarked door in the far corner of the gym. Upon opening it, it’s clearly a staff bathroom, a single stall with harsh fluorescent lights and gray cement floors. The door clicks heavily and locks behind you. You don’t get much time to survey the surroundings before your back travels forcefully into the wall, Changbin caging you between his shoulders. Body pressed to you a small needy whine catches in his throat. “You’re okay? You want to help me out?” He gulps, eyes wide. You nod as his hands clasp and drag all over your body, revealing in the indentations his fingers make. “Gonna let me fuck your tits? God I need to fuck your tits. They’re all I think about. Please let me fuck your tits please, god,” his mouth carries on and on a mile a minute as he feels as much of you as he can. Twitching and trembling he finally lets his hands cup your breasts through your bra. Heavy and plush in his grasp, it’s somehow exactly as he imagined and even better. “So soft, you’ll let me fuck them, yeah?” “Ye-yeah-they’re sweaty but-” you apologetically murmur. His hands feel so good on your aching muscles, you wonder where else his hands would feel good. A flash of heat floods your sex. “Sweaty fine. It’s good. Great.” He shuffles his shorts down around his ankles, “please, hurry, please.” His cock is red and angry, precum coating and shining the tip. Getting down to eye level with it, he’s thick, mouthwateringly so. Hesitating you consider wrapping your lips around the head, just to see how much of him you could fit, a personal challenge to surmount. He whines, a leg bending and twitching, “leave the bra on.”

Your eyebrow shoots up but you oblige, sliding him under the band, nestled snugly between your mounds as you squeeze on either side. He eyelids flutter as the slip of sweat and precum coats his shaft. Sucking air in through his teeth he slowly thrusts along the tight crevice. The sight itself is enough to have him lightheaded, his cockhead just barely poking out of the top of your cleavage with each thrust upward, shiny and covered in body fluid. He doesn’t even realize the sounds he’s making. Small grunts under his breath mixed with reedy whines. Most of your partners had been relatively quiet about their enjoyment save for a few dirty phrases whispered closely to your ear. Changbin was the opposite, virtually impossible to shut up. “Feels good?” You encourage him further. “Tight around your thick cock?” “So tight. So soft. Fuck.” His eyes close, brows furrowed in concentration. Your voice is so quiet and sweet and he just wants to ruin you, or be ruined by you. His legs tremble and clench. “Spit on it. Just a little. Slowly.” Staring up at him you hold your tits in place, flush with his hips, and make a show of gathering spit in your mouth and slowly letting it drip from your tongue to the valley of your chest, gathering and sliding over the barely exposed slit of his cock. “Like this?” Changbin swallows hard. “Yeah like that baby.” He shudders, hands cupping over yours, squeezing harder. Hips snapping forcefully his thumbs ghost over your nipples, pebbled and pressed to the fabric of the cups. You thirst suddenly, mouth filling with spit. God damn it you want him so badly. You need to hear him cum, see his muscles tense and relax, watch as his face scrunches moments before everything becomes bliss. Your entire body thrums with need, tongue lolling out and down as if he fucked your breasts hard enough he could reach it. A worthy goal for him that he attempts, jostling you harder, grunting and groaning as he wills himself to breach the gap. Your bra is pink, your tongue is pink, your lips are pink, you’re all pink for him. His pink gym bunny. Suddenly he does it, the hot salty slit of his cock hits the very tip of your tongue. You moan, unable to form words. He does it again as you push your jaw just a little bit lower, aching at the joint. He can’t believe it, the heat of your mouth even briefly has his brain foggy and vision blurring. His stance falters. Thighs tensing and cock resting on your sternum he cums, spilling the warm pearly substance across your collarbone. “Shit,” he mutters between moans. He can’t stop his hips slow rutting, spreading his release further down the chasm of your tits. “Sorry, I can clean- I can take care of this for you. Fuck.” “You just want to touch my tits more, pervert.” You smile. He smiles and laughs, “yeah maybe.”

Changbin is LITERALLY the hardest for me to write so I’m trying to get his done earlier in the month so i don’t burn out and give up. He’s my bias so like...nothing ever feels quite “right” when I write him. If that makes sense.

However i love when others write him so please this is an open call for sending me your favorite Changbin centric fics in literally any pairing configuration.

#kinktober #kinktober 2023 #stray kids kinktober #skz kinktober #changbin smut #seo changbin smut #skz smut #stray kids smut

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ashleyloob · 2 years ago

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Hi!

From someone who is disorganized and discouraged, I would love advice on weight-lifting/building muscle. Would you share your understanding of building muscle and the breakdown of diet?

If possible, could you share how you apply what you know to yourself? If you use any tools to help you?

Struggled with working out, gaining weight, and eating my whole life. Thanks!

prefacing this with some important info for fellow disorganized scatterbrains!!!!

the main reason why ppl have trouble sticking to a lifestyle change is because they try to make very drastic changes too quick, and you get overwhelmed and it becomes unsustainable. this is especially an issue for neurodivergent folks, and since it's Tumblr I assume a good chunk of y'all are (me too dw)

DON'T immediately overhaul ur diet and hit the gym 5x a week from day 1!!! hitting tiny goals consistently is also more rewarding than working towards one very large arbitrary goal that you might not reach, esp when it comes to working out. start veeery small if u need to, such as only 10 bodyweight squats per day like i did and go from there. you wanna program ur brain into feeling accomplished to keep you motivated. patience is key!!!!

ok!! now onto the more detailed info below

Disclaimer: I'm still a newbie myself!! only consistently lifting heavy for about 3 months as of this post. I did a good deal of excessive info diving on lifting using the power of Sheer Autism, and my main gym buddy is very experienced & taught me a good chunk of this shit so shout-out to my pal for making all this possible xoxo

so good news!! "building muscle" is very easy for beginners starting from zero. newbie gainz are absolutely real. at this stage you can do just about anything at the gym and get stronger bc u can only go up. BUT!! if you structure it, you can make the process enjoyable and much more efficient. if you're goal oriented (lookin at u ADHD menaces), you'll love the concept progressive overload.

PROGRESSIVE OVERLOAD & SETS/REPS

wikipedia defines progressive overload as: a method of strength training and hypertrophy training that advocates for the gradual increase of the stress placed upon the musculoskeletal and nervous system. in layman's terms, it just means gradually adding more weight as you work out to increase the difficulty as you get stronger. progress is VERY easy to track because of this, and you'll be hitting PRs pretty much every week for the first couple of months and that shit feels fantastic because you physically feel yourself getting stronger so rapidly. I use the app Strong to track my workouts. so, how do we structure progressive overload? that's through sets/reps. A rep is a single execution of an exercise. 1 squat is one rep. 2 squat is 2 reps. and so on. A set is a collection of reps. The format is Sets x Reps, for example: 3x5 means 3 sets of 5 reps. You will rest between sets, and it's typically anywhere from 1 minute all the way up to 5 minutes depending on the level of exertion/type of training you are doing. Heavier weights mean longer rest periods and vice versa.

WHERE DO I EVEN START??

For those interested in barbell training: the r/fitness beginner routine is pretty good! I also recommend 5x5 stronglifts. both are very straightforward, but also note the typical olympic barbell is 45lbs. If this is a weight you struggle with, you can begin with bodyweight exercises, dumbbells, or machines at the gym which are all very BEGINNER beginner friendly. especially when it comes to legs you're probably much stronger than you think. Most people can squat 45lbs first try. don't be afraid -- you're standing on those things all day, they can support hella weight. Like I mentioned earlier, don't be afraid to start veeeery small and work your way up from there. I started at home with doing only bodyweight squats without the barbell, then added on benching with light 7lb dumbbells after a week, then impulse signed up for a gym membership a month later and began to go there to use equipment and now i'm deadlifting over 100lbs as a tiny girl that previously was too weak to even lift a 40lb dog. it snowballs quicker than you think once you gain confidence in your own body and its abilities!

WOAH I DON'T KNOW HOW TO SQUAT/DEADLIFT/BENCH/THIS IS SCARY AND IM FUCKING UP

If you can, i highly recommend getting a personal trainer to assist you, or tag along with a gymrat pal to show you the ropes. This page is also a good resource to learn specific lifts. otherwise, youtube is your best friend. you can record your sets and compare your form to form tutorials on youtube, and actively take notes on what to change the next time you work out. Be an active learner!!! be aware of what muscles are engaged when you lift and how your body feels. almost NOBODY gets it right the first time, esp with barbells. we've all made fools out of ourselves at the gym as beginners it's chill. i find people at the gym are very nice and willing to help you out if you're struggling, and people don't judge at all-- it's very easy to get in your own head in these spaces but most humans there are supportive and want you to succeed, especially since it's a hobby they are also passionate about. the more you do it, the less anxious you get. exposure therapy is very effective!! Also, almost all the barbell exercises can be replaced with smaller dumbbells, and you can do them at home if you get your own set + a workout bench (pretty cheap if u get secondhand, check facebook marketplace/craigslist). i got mad social anxiety myself so i understand sometimes you just can't, and this is an option for those that find public spaces overwhelming.

DIET

I personally don't think specialized diets/precise macro tracking is super duper important for newbies/casuals, only moderately important (spicy take for some but whatever). but you probably naturally will take an interest in diet once you realize it'll help you perform significantly better in the gym. the only macro i track is protein. You can use a TDEE (total daily energy expenditure) calculator to roughly estimate the amount of protein you need for maximum gainz. it's usually around .7-1g of protein for every pound of lean body mass (weight that isn't fat mass). Imma be real it's pretty hard for me to hit the recommended protein goal and most days I don't because my appetite just can't kick in for the amount it demands, and protein is super filling. I found that if i decreased the amount of carbs i eat, i am able to consume more protein bc i guess there's more room in my stomach lol. i eat a fuck ton of greek yogurt, chicken, fish, and tofu. when i started working out, i begin cooking a lot more and found i naturally craved less processed junk foods and snacks because the protein was keeping me full all day which is a plus! Even when im not regularly hitting my protein goal my gym progress is still going well and I think it's simply because my diet is A LOT better than what it used to be in my gremlin days. I also eat a lot more now that i've gained a bit of muscle, so do be prepared for food costs to go up as your metabolism increases and demands more energy to upkeep your gainz.

HOW LONG DOES IT TAKE FOR ME TO LOOK LIKE A MUSCLE MOMMY????

a whileeee. over a year, probably, unless if you're on anabolic steroids (dont ever do that u will quite literally die). and physique is mostly from diet since it's dependent on your body fat percentage, the saying "abs are made in the kitchen" is true. its why you see hyper skinny terminally indoors gamer dudes with abs, even if they'd snap in half if you farted in their general direction. those mfs barely eat they too busy being gamers i am no longer interested in lifting for aesthetics personally since i get more joy from hitting PRs and i'm pretty content with my body image, but ik physique is the reason why most people get into lifting so i'll touch on it. Weightlifting on its own will not make you lose weight or fat. Again, it needs to be supplemented with a healthy sustainable diet (DO NOT DO CRASH DIETS THAT SHIT IS GARBAGE) and a form of cardio. I actually gained 8lbs since I began lifting from water retention & new muscle mass (muscle is more dense than fat, your body retains water when repairing muscle after a gym sesh) but my measurements and pants size have remained the same. I'm short, so something as small as a 5lb increase usually bumped me up a pants size but it didn't this time bc im gettin swole :') if you want to track physique changes, measuring your waistline & progress pics is a better way to do so than the scale. If you want bigger muscles, look into hypertrophy training. it's a tad different from strength training, mainly because you do higher reps at a lower weight.

#lifting advice

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