#been listening to these songs over and over again all night i feel insane

[dovedrangeas]

these fuckin songs........

[wonryllis]

✶ 𝐁𝐀𝐁𝐘𝒟𝐎𝐋𝐋? RICH BOY ENHYPEN PINNING AFTER YOU.

目录──────𝗔𝗟𝗧𝗘𝗥𝗡𝗔𝗧𝗜𝗩𝗘𝗟𝗬, 𝗐𝗁𝖾𝗋𝖾 𝗒𝗈𝗎'𝗋𝖾 𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝖽𝗂𝖺𝗆𝗈𝗇𝖽 𝗈𝖿 𝗍𝗁𝖾𝗂𝗋 𝖾𝗒𝖾𝗌.

𝓉𝗵𝗲 𝗪𝗢𝗥𝗟𝗗 𝗦𝗧𝗔𝗚𝗘 ⋅ enhypen showing that you're not just one of the girls. wordcount total 2882 (approx 0.4k each) ⭑ CONTAINS— female!reader, fluff, suggestive, lots of swearing. % strongly recommend listening to ›› the respective songs while reading! jungwon's is inspired by ␥ kavin and kaning. ( THE ARCHIVE? ) PLS REBLOG ><

𝗟𝗘𝗘 𝗛𝗘𝗘𝗦𝗘𝗨𝗡𝗚

ぃ ⏤ now playing. HELLGIRL BY ARI ABDUL

"shit. you gotta wear this one, angel," heeseung groans in satisfaction, ignorant and indifferent to the fact that all the store employees could hear him, someone who never brings over girls to places like these, going insane over one. and the fact that you were unable to wrap your head around this situation just yet.

it was surreal and it was nerve wrecking. but heeseung was adamant that he needed you.

needed you to dress so fucking gorgeous and stand by his side as his date for the night while he paraded around greeting his parents' guests. showing them that he is capable of being committed by bringing along a partner for the first time ever. that's what he tells you—

"is this really fine?" you ask again, hands dusting over the sleek satin hugging your skin in a way that it tickled. heeseung stands up and strides overs to where you stand, arms sliding around your waist to pull you against him. "it's more than fine, absolutely stunning," leaning into your neck to leave kisses, "and so hot," right infront of everyone, no one daring to say a word to him, except you.

you who has been an exception to all his rules, you who has made him want to do things he has never wanted to before. you who has swept him off his feet.

you push against his chest in an attempt to stop him,"we'll be late, should go now," he hums in a low growl, lips nipping right against your ear before he pulls away with much exasperation almost unsated. clicking his tongue in annoyance for the staff to hurry the billing once he's done admiring you. unable to stand that anyone beside him see you dressed so pretty.

"just smile and follow my lead," heeseung tells you once you arrive at the venue. giving you an encouraging look as he instructs the valet to wait until you seem calm enough to step out. that's what he tells you— heart eyes and odd actions speaking for themselves. his hands find your waist when you finally walk up the stairs, breath shaky as you pass the entrance.

"relax angel, 'm right here, we can leave whenever you want," he kisses the side of your head, lips lightly touching your styled hair. never caring about who's looking and who's thinking what. if only you knew it too.

𝗣𝗔𝗥𝗞 𝗝𝗢𝗡𝗚𝗦𝗘𝗢𝗡𝗚

ぃ ⏤ now playing. STAY BY ARI ABDUL

"look behind you, princess," the voice incoming from your phone suddenly sounds too loud, paired with faint footsteps coming to a halt. jay's lips break into a wide smile when you turn around in an instant to look at him. your eyes following his hands holding an enormous bouquet of red roses, before you notice anything else.

before you notice the want in his eyes. the want for you.

"jay? i thought you were in— " you speak into the phone, eyes locked with his, but before you can finish he hangs up the call. approaching you with quick steps and immediately pulling you into a kiss. one that's short but deep enough to convey his feelings. "berlin? yeah, but i flew back for you," he breathes out against your lips.

"why?" "you know why love," his fingers twirl the hair falling into face, tucking them away and cupping your cheek as he gives you a smile before stepping away.

he waits for you to say something, to address his feelings but like always you avoid it and like always jay lets you. alas there will come a time when you would no longer be able to deny his love, so until then he will continue to show you all ways you own his heart in. his forever princess."what about that conference you were going to attend with your dad?" you ask, accepting his bouquet.

watching him with a soft giggle as he struggles to pull out a single rose and place it behind your ear. "don't worry about it," in a reassuring tone he leads you to his car. teasing you of a surprise each time you question where you are headed.

asking you to have your eyes closed while he leads you to the rooftop of a high-rise building owned by his family, illuminated by pretty lights and flowery wreaths, and a firework show worth a million.

all just for you.

to pose a smile on your face and to be the one to put it. to be the reason of your happiness and to be the person beside you in your best memories,"happy new year, princess," jay whispers into you ear as you open your eyes to see all of it. "jay this—" you gasp in a trance, gaze hooked on the sky while his is fixated in the way the fireworks shine against your pretty orbs and the gloss on your lips,"it's all for you,"

𝗦𝗜𝗠 𝗝𝗔𝗘𝗬𝗨𝗡

ぃ ⏤ now playing. MEDDLE ABOUT BY CHASE ATLANTIC

"you owe me. you can't keep avoiding me forever, doll," jake chuckles, noticing how you turn the other way after catching a glimpse of him. finding it adorable how you do everything you can to not cross paths with him.

leaving him no choice but to wait for you outside your university, leaning against his black lykan hypersport; attracting unwanted attention while his eyes only look for your cute panicked figure amidst the crowd.

"i told you it was a mistake—" you refute, throwing a glare at his smug face as he drives right beside you, following your every step, nonchalant about all the stares you both get as long as you agree to him taking you out. "get in the car," or the other way round, he's fine with both. frustrated and knowing you'd never be able to escape him, you decide to give in.

"you owe me lunch," jake grins as his eyes watch you get into the passenger seat just like the passenger princess you are.

his passenger princess. first and last in his beloved car.

"jake this— isn't this too—" your heart skips beats at the sight of the dock and the luxury cruise restaurant closing in, scared and nervous about how much you'd have to spend but jake just shushes you. getting out the car first and coming over to open the door for you; one hand holding yours and the other cushioning your head as you step out.

"just let me have your time and i'll let you off of staining my prada with coffee," he begs, afraid you'd walk out of here if he were to tell you the real reason. if he were to tell you that you have his heart and no matter what you do his feelings are not changing. if he were to tell you he wanted to take you out to all these places and spoil you rotten and occupy your mind like you occupy his.

if he were to tell you it was indeed not your fault for he bumped into you on purpose to find an excuse to talk to you.

"but—" jake shushes you again, fingers rubbing against your lips as he shakes his head before pulling out the chair for you and helping you sit properly,"don't think too much doll, just do as i say, please?" planning to keep you busy until the sun goes down so he can take you to for a ride on his yacht.

𝗣𝗔𝗥𝗞 𝗦𝗨𝗡𝗚𝗛𝗢𝗢𝗡

ぃ ⏤ now playing. BABYDOLL BY ARI ABDUL

"fuck baby, don't cry like that," sunghoon panics, his fingers grazing under your eyes to gently wipe the tears. afraid if he's not careful enough, he'll break you. "as much as i love the way you look so pretty like this, tears are not for someone like you," he has no idea how to soothe your frantically crying figure, slouched in the passenger seat against the expensive leather of his aston martin.

his hands fumble around in an attempt to think of ways he could just make you feel better and smile for him. those adorable crinkle of your eyes that have him whipped.

fuming each time he thinks of the moron who took that opportunity away from him by making you sad. he swears if he finds him, he'll beat the living daylights out of him. remind him not to linger anywhere around his girl.

sunghoon softly cups your cheek in his palm and leans in to kiss you, lips moving slow and sensual, "forget him, let me make you happy," he whispers into your mouth once he pulls away, foreheads touching and hands caressing your face lovingly. he makes sure your belt is secured before driving off to one of the luxury malls in the city, ones where you need to be of a certain level to enter.

a place you probably could never have the chance to enter if it weren't for him.

"my princess gotta shop her sadness out, hmm?" sunghoon coos as he stops outside the building, watching you gape in surprise, surprised himself that you are yet to realize just how much you mean to him.

"come on, i'll buy you whatever you lay your eyes on," he insists before you have the chance to deny him.

his hands rest at the back of your waist, leading you inside after handing his keys to the valet. dropping a soft kiss on your temple when you watch his vip card being inspected with a nervous breath of how elite this place has to be.

and knowing how new you must feel to all this, sunghoon pulls you closer with the intention of making it known that this is how it's gonna be from now, "get used to it, baby," you're not his yet but he's gonna treat you like you are. after all it's only a matter of time before it happens.

𝗞𝗜𝗠 𝗦𝗘𝗢𝗡𝗪𝗢𝗢

ぃ ⏤ now playing. GOOD GIRL BY THOMAS LAROSA

"good girl, you did a great job," sunoo pats your head teasingly amused at the confusion adorning your features. "sunoo, what were you doing there! you don't even have marketing?" the way you close in, demanding an explanation assures him that you indeed were affect by his presence, by the eye contact he held with you the entire time you were giving your presentation.

walking into the lecture hall in the middle of it as if he owned the place and taking a seat at a spot that directly put him in your line of sight. smirking, raising his brows and pushing his tongue against his cheeks to distract and annoy you.

"would you believe me if i said i came to see you?" his hands took ahold of your wrists playing with your fingers as he waited for you to answer.

"liar," you whisper, suddenly conscious of the implication behind his words and it makes him chuckle, of course what did he expect? you're hard to get, and perhaps that's the reason he feels so attracted, almost crazy over you.

like something he has to have, someone he has to have.

he takes a step closer, his varsity hat poking against the top of your head as his eyes bore into yours just the way they did inside earlier,"see? what do you want me to say then?" he whispers back, tone suddenly changing into a serious one. "you can't just enter any class like that," your innocent claim goes through him from one ear and falls through the other. how naive you are.

"i can if it's my dad's university," he can't help but chuckle at the expression on your face when you put the pieces together and realize it. all those times you came across him in places with strict attendance, it all made sense now.

"as adorably as you scold me, you're gonna see me everywhere you go," sunoo warns, leaning in impossibly close, lips hovering over yours,"you should stop fooling yourself baby,"

his hands move from your wrists to rest against the wall behind, voice dropping an octave,"and you should stop fooling around just because you can," you bite back, pressing your palm into his chest to push him back. "i'm fooling around because i want you, and i will have you," "you—" "we have a party this weekend at our summer villa, come with me?"

𝗬𝗔𝗡𝗚 𝗝𝗨𝗡𝗚𝗪𝗢𝗡

ぃ ⏤ now playing. SINNERS BY ARI ABDUL AND THOMAS LAROSA

"jungwon? what are you doing here? are you okay?" it makes jungwon happy to see you worrying about him, shoving his hands into the pockets of his pant as he watches you walk around the counter to his figure by the door. finding his cerulean blue chevrolet corvette 2lz parked in his usual spot, and him still dressed in the armani and hermès set you saw him in an hour ago when he dropped you off at your uncle's flower shop.

"mhm, just wanted to see my pretty girl again," he grins cockily once you realize there's nothing wrong and he's just trying playing around like always.

albeit to jungwon, it's never been a play and you have never been a toy.

this has been his way of showing you that you're not just another girl he's chasing after; because yang jungwon has never chased as opposed to what you think. and to harbour such deep and honest feelings that compel him to do what he has never done, that should have given you the hint by now. perhaps he'll just have to try a tad bit harder.

"how do you wear this?" he struts inside, passing by you to the space behind the counter you previously stood at, dangling a lone apron by his pinky and raising his brows at you, waiting. "your clothes will get dirty!" your attempts to curb him fall through for jungwon's persistence to stay with you holds like a strong wall, incapable of budging.

"i don't really care," jungwon's hands loop around the strings in a way that has the apron falling off making you giggle as you give in and just step in to help him,"idiot, that's not how you do it," you mumble.

and all he can think of is how he wants to be your idiot.

"how does this look? i think it looks so pretty on you," he says, putting a messy wreath on your head. to jungwon there's always flowers blooming everywhere you go, sweet scent overtaking all his scenes believing that's how you intoxicated him.

you slap away his hands in a shy chuckle that he doesn't understand, did he say something wrong? not aware and quite literally clueless of his own effect. by the time the sun sets down, you're asleep with your head down on the counter, facing him. and jungwon admires the way you looks so pretty, prettier than any flower.

𝗡𝗜𝗦𝗛𝗜𝗠𝗨𝗥𝗔 𝗥𝗜𝗞𝗜

ぃ ⏤ now playing. STUCKINMYBRAIN BY CHASE ATLANTIC

"riki?" oh. you're here? riki looks up at the sound of your footsteps getting closer, halting a metre away from him, like you always do, not too close, not too far and it drives him crazy. "what are you doing here?" you ask, confused to find him waiting outside your mundane apartment building with his out of place red ferrari sf90.

"uh, you left this in the car last time," he fumbles out a dior liquid blush, clearly brand new and a shade you have never used before.

"that's not mine," giggling, you walk over to the other side, opening the passenger seat door to fish out the gloss you actually did leave and waving it in the air to show him,"this is mine richboy," the soft sounds of laughter, your teasing voice.

his favorite thing in the world as of late.

you who has him smitten with infatuation, unable to get you off his mind no matter how much he tries. you who never gives him the answer he wants but never pushes him away either. you who makes him feel like a pathetic loser, you who makes him want to try as many times as he can to win your heart.

"it's a gift," he quickly improvises, wanting you to accept it, of getting a chance to give you something. "you're gifting me a blush?" you question and it throws him off, blush?,"wait, it's not a lipgloss— i, i had no idea, i have never—" riki swears, he really had no clue,"bought makeup?" he nods and it makes you burst into a fit of laughter again. it warms his heart, leaning against his car and watching you with eyes that speak volumes of his feelings.

feelings that anyone could notice, anyone but you.

he lets you revel in his silly naivety, content to know you are not longer sad as you were a few days ago.

"now this suits you pretty little face," he says once you seem to calm down, bewildered at his sudden compliment while he walks over to you.

cupping your face and caressing your cheeks,"so pretty," mumbling under his breath, loud enought to reach your ears,"it's boring when you cry, baby," his lips hover over your own as both of your heartbeats pick up in sync, breath getting caught up at the shift in the atmosphere. "let's go on a drive, we'll get you a bunch of pretty glosses to wear for me,"

TAGLIST ( open. ) @kangseulgithegreat @s00buwu @lilyuwon @pockyyasii @nctislifue @ashtxrie @miniature-tragedy @jayujus @brachives @thoughtsmeander2tumblingblindly @eeunoia @nxzz-skz @shawnyle @potato0579 @enhastolemyheart @ro-diaries @aaa-sia @okwonyo @snoopypupp @enhabooks @jjunae @criminalyun

[scarlettmurphy]

STARCROSSED PT2 +ੈ✩‧₊˚ LOGAN HOWLETT.

logan and y/n — where you are completely in love with a man older then you’re father by a good century or so.. whose completely in love with another.

- content warning age gap (is legal) drinking. explicit. swearing. dirty humour. comfort (an ounce). drugs. nsfw. sick. body issues. sh. angst.. maybe happy endings?! pairings: older!logan howlett x xaiver!reader. logan howlett x jean grey.

spoiler: insane yearning and angst i’m sorry im too far gone ☹️ happy ? where.

note this is part two to starcrossed, prepare for even heavier angst!🫶🏻 i didn’t realise how sad this was until i finished the chapter and realised holy shit this is long. part three is already in the works. i hope u enjoy it! make sure to read pt1. it’s a bit diff from the first one but i hope u like it still. also if you’ve seen the movie ten things i hate about u the mid bit of this might remind u of that one scene if u get me :) song: need you now by lady a cos i was listening to it and jeff buckley whilst reading this? also on the timeline im going for like xmen 2 time i think?

tags — @faceache111 @malfoys-demigod @navs-bhat @dilfismz @thisbipuff-isaswiftie @twinky-wink @thewiselionessss @thecraziestcrayon @awhoreforalotofshows @emily-b @jae48 @cxptainbuck @444st4rg1rl 🫶🏻

[i hope you like it!!]

you’d absolutely love to believe that what you heard last night wasn’t what happened but as your mind goes over the previous night as you fought yourself to stay awake during your fathers little class your brain couldn’t forget the continuous moans and little yells that you heard from a few rooms across from your own at the mansion for a good hour or two last night. you can’t help but figure out that logan most certainly found jean and just thinking about it made you feel sick. scott being the main thing on your brain after you got over the fact logan most definitely fucked jean last night.

she was a cheater. what else could you expect? your thoughts swirling in your brain causing an indescribable amount of heart ache as you kept yourself completely quiet and withdrawn from whatever was going on in this lesson, rogue clearly being able to tell you were off as she glanced at bobby giving him a look you picked up on — him shrugging his shoulders in return as you cursed your sadness for being so obvious.

just the thought of jean and logan staring at eachother hurt you but her touching him, his hands over her skin, her lips on his, his mind only on her in that moment and his gaze locked into hers as she let him take her yet again enraged you to another level it was a struggle not to jump into his mind and find out exactly what happened but you couldn’t, you wouldn’t. your brain fighting with your heart in every way as you felt sick with all those pictures of the scenario you were forming for yourself.

so from that knowledge as you sat in class you knew you needed to stop liking him for good. he didn’t like you, he was throwing it in your face. you heard it all and it hurt you too much to bare. you didn’t even wanna look at him — that single thought of contact sending you crazy. you couldn’t even bring yourself to see him today. you didn’t want too, you couldn’t. seeing jean as you passed through the kitchen earlier was enough to make you nearly cry and immediately stop that tiny breakfast you had made.

you really couldn’t deal with this. one bit. you never did well with emotional pain — physical was something you could endure, yet emotional was always something you couldn’t stomach ever since you were a little girl.

+ੈ✩‧₊˚

you'd been avoiding him like the plague. literally. whenever you saw him at the end of the halls you'd turn the other away, force a little smile and act like you had somewhere to go if you were in conversation and it had been like that for two weeks. two weeks had passed since one of your normal conversations, the friendly chats you admired in your brain and made out to be more, the little touches he'd give you that you couldn't comprehend was only a friend thing to do, the way he'd hug you.. the deep conversations, the way he'd sometimes kiss your forehead before you left for bed, watching the rain together and just joking together all something you had put in the past. that had been gone for two weeks and to say it was breaking you would be an understatement.

you could tell others has noticed the practical borderline dissociation within you since you had been a little mute recently not that it was specially due to logan (it completely all was) but you didn't want it to be obvious, you hated that it could be perceived that way so you knew you had to do something about it. who knew heartache for one that didn't love you back could destroy you this badly from the inside out?

.. and today was no different on the logan front. you saw him once today in the halls ushering something to hank — the two in bustling conversation and you made sure not to risk it by going to class, to upset over it all to deal with another short horrible conversation where you were nothing but cold to him as you tried to cut down any romantic feelings you had for him. every time you spoke now you could see the confusion and frustration in his eyes, the mental image to much to bare as you went on hiding in your room and pondering and that’s where you had been since — buried in clothing choices as you tried to stomach down the anxiety that had been growing in you over the fact it was jeans birthday party today and you would have to make an appearance after you had been a hermit since you’d got your heart broken by a guy that didn’t even know. rogue and bobby being the only two people you had really spoke too since the shut down yet their concern had been growing annoying as rogue clearly told bobby about the little crush she could’ve guessed, and got out of you when the two of you were high together a few months ago, you had on logan. bobby actually giving you little options of guys you could date to get over someone which was all you needed to hear when you realised rogue had told him as he literally mentioned hank who they knew you recently hiked with since he had been bothering you over your melancholy, yet you had left before it was a full fledge little argument.

just the thought of having to socialise with him and the others and step out of the hole you’d built for yourself to hide in irritated you especially for jean of all people’s party, your ‘smidge’ of hatred for the woman who had really been rude to you since she’d known you not because of logan, because god on that front she wins and it feels like she’s married to him despite her ties to scott, but on the power front. she knew you had powers incomparable to hers that you hardly even showcased magneto being someone who taught you many things when you were younger, your own parents being raven and charles. of course you had powers which were indescribable.

and most of the time you wanted to use it on that bitch. you were lucky she couldn’t get into your twisted mind to find that fact out.

you let out a little sigh as you decided on the black mini skirt and sweater — you finally having an excuse for the fall outfit and lack of dress because it was october which has always been your favourite season and best time of year yet this year that didn’t apply because you haven’t been hardly able to enjoy it because of isolation you’d forced yourself into.

y/n had to swallow her own self pity down as she leaned over to her perfume bottle on the drawer next to her mirror as she took in the image of her body in the skirt. her shrinking body, a scoff leaving her lips as she wasn’t happy with what she saw in the reflection. she never could be. the aroma of the perfume not masking her feelings at all as she put on some dc martens paired with black tights. the perfect little outfit yet she was sure jean would be outshining her on that front. god she didn’t even wanna imagine logan’s eyes being locked onto jean tonight, the heart ache already unbearable to comprehend as she swallowed a lump that formed in her throat. that aching feeling hadn’t gone away since the start of knowing logan the way she did, maybe that was a sign from the people above about how destined it was.. or how not it was.

these muddled thoughts led her too some early drinking as if she wouldn’t be getting shitfaced later. pregaming alone which is a bit self pity full as she swallowed the burning liquor down her throat, the whiskey hitting her softly and slowly enough to give her the confidence to leave her room twenty minutes later for this party.

+ੈ✩‧₊˚

the decorations were perfect, the present corner was overflowing and the students and people were everywhere. jean being clearly the popular girl from the looks of this party, as if y/n already didn’t know that, as the blasting music just made her more aware of the scenario she was in as she fought the urge to look around the room for logan as she went straight over to the bar that had been made. the party was the perfect one a girl, woman, could ask for and y/n could feel the jealously bubbling already that she bit down as she forced a friendly smile to join her lips.

walking through the dancing groups of people, there hardly even being any spaces to walk unless you wanted to bump into a coked up or insanely drunk teenager or wade. who she was lucky to get past without having to talk to yet, no matter how much she did like and enjoy his company she couldn’t deal with his jokes right now which she could guess who’d they’d be centered around, she knew he knew to some extent she was just lucky he hadn’t out rightly said it. that would be too much pity for her to deal with, that coming from wade being another level of pathetic.

the second she leant against the bar she managed to grab the busy barmaids attention giving her a soft nod and polite smile as she didn’t notice the figure beside her as she asked for a coke and vodka.

“thank god you’re showing your face — i thought i was going to have to clone you to get a good conversation.” hank rolled out his tipsiness showing as he pulled y/n into a tight hug when he was sat down on the stool. y/n letting out a low chuckle as she hugged him back nicely, his presence being a little surprise she tried not to seem so bothered about.

“hiya hank.” y/n said softly as the barmaid came over with her drink, placing it next to her. “thanks.” y/n nodded out as hank placed his hand on the stool next to him as she immediately grabbed it and took a swig.

“come! sit.” he ushered in with a drunken smile on his face, a bright one as usual, as he patted the bar stool next to him inviting her to sit and before y/n could even speak up in reply as she slid down on the stool hank bit in.

“where the hell have you been?” he abruptly said bluntly, putting a little look on his face off one that’s pissed off as y/n felt the guilt rush through her as she wrapped her fingers around the glass drowning her truth in the drink as she took a big sip off the liquor acting as if that didn’t taste appalling as she shrugged her shoulders at hanks obvious question which has an obvious answer to that she’d play off as a stupid claim if questioned about it.

“—i’ve been busy! controlling powers— small missions, and that.” y/n lied out.

hank furrowed his eyebrows at his words, giving her a knowing look before he shook his head swiftly at what she said. seeing right through her little lie he truly knew nothing much about what the truth was or not as he took a little sip of his beer.

“i know you but i’m not pushing it— rather you bite of logan’s heads rather then mine.” hank said out lowly as y/n’s eyebrows furrowed at his comment as a look of confusion spread over her face at the mention of him but before she could question hank on it she was met with two hands around her waist, pulling her tightly back purposely.

“hello pretty little liars, you’re aria?” wade said loudly into her ear his drunkenness obvious as y/n scoffed, him clearly stating that because her outfit choice as he squeezed her even tighter y/n’s eyes rolling as she elbowed him playfully back as his hands on her faltered as he playfully shoved her back.

“—elsa! you made it snow yet?” y/n said back to him as she was met with the sound of his laughter as he pulled on the stool next to y/n, making the guy who was sat on it mutter a curse before wade sent him a glare and then went speed walking away clearly a boy as young as fourteen or thirteen who just got the shit scared out him for, wade’s harsh look as he sqt down on the stool as he met y/n’s gaze.

“you know i have honey.” he nodded out with a smirk as hank leaned into the twos space.

“shots anyone?” hank rolled out, fixing his glasses as wade enthusiastically said a quick yes, y/n adding to the fire. “—very much needed.” y/n drove out as wade sent her a little look of knowing yet he held back the urge to call her out on it. he was being a ‘good’ friend in his eyes anyway, he didn’t wanna hear her say things about logan when he knew a few things himself on how the other party felt.

hank calling the barmaid over as wade pulled y/n’s stool closer to his that knowing look still present on his face as he played with the knowledge he had a bit just in a little playful way.

“you seen the birthday girl yet?..gave her a gift?” wade said sarcastically knowing the two didn’t really see eye to eye on a LOT of things as y/n gave him a little glare, him having been present for many of their little disagreements.

“luckily i haven’t, as i’ve brung nothing.” y/n rumbled back as wade nudged her playfully with her words as hank grabbed the tray of shots from the barmaid— y/n’s eyes widening once she saw how many shots he had ordered. “fifteen?” y/n broke out with a raised eyebrow as hank chuckled as he took one, downing it straight away before grabbing another as wade spoke up cockily.

“who’s pants are you trying to get into?” wade rolled out, his voice sly as he grabbed two for himself as y/n leaned over and took one ready to get shitfaced, maybe that’d stop her mind from falling back onto logan every other second her longing heart internally hating this situation more and more as she yearned to see him but she bit back the urge to even look around for him. halting that urge by taking a shot.

“preferably anyone with a pulse and no dick between their legs.” hank said right as y/n took another shot, her nearly choking on the burning liquid which was a horrible mix of vodka and god knows what.

“i can tuck.” wade said lowly as this made it worse, y/n nudging wade, shaking her head as she held back her laugh as she swallowed the shot she just took. “disgusting!” she rolled out as she took another, downing it before placing the shot down on the table.

“ah! sweeties jealous.” wade spoke up sarcastically with that all familiar cocky smile on his face with that teasing glint in his eyes as he handed another shot y/n’s way as she took it gracefully as they all cheersed their glasses together. that being just one of the about eight times they did that within the next thirty to sixty minutes as y/n bit back her thoughts with copious amounts of shots and soon enough they had gone through a good four or so tray off shots and a few drinks each.

every passing minute y/n felt her mind get closer and closer to the edge as every time she felt that aching feeling grow she’d swallow it back with another sip of liquor or large shot — wades jokes passing the time and hanks yapping and her own occasional drunken chime in making her mind a mess as hank got another row of shots.

the songs and wade and hank’s voices becoming a blur in y/n’s mind as she swallowed nothing but the truth with those shots. every sip feeling like more heartache she couldn’t stop having.

+ੈ✩‧₊˚

y/n was practically stuck too the bar stool, her eyes scanning the crowd occasionally (by occasionally around five times if not more a minute) as she looked for him. her mind lingering on a certain someone as it always tended to do the liquor just amplifying those feelings as hank spoke up.

“you know— you look like your mum.”

his words caused y/n’s attention to snap over to hank as she raised an eyebrow, wade making a little ‘oo’ in the background even if he couldn’t help but agree with his comment as he sipped on the cocktail he had ordered a few drinks previously that had just been laying there on the side. the bartender making a fuck ton of profit from these three miserables.

“very dead?” y/n said sarcastically as hank gave her a little look — clearly a little annoyed she didn’t take the comment seriously as he leaned a little closer to her.

“beautiful you idiot.” hank added out, his words making her eyebrows furrow a bit as she took in his drunken words as she gave him a little a smile — swallowing the depreciating joke she was close to making as she took a sip of her drink.

“thank you hank.” y/n nodded out calmly as wade butted in.

“—fucking hell, incoming for angry jacob twilight wannabe.” wade cursed out as y/n’s gaze moved over wade following his eyes to where he was looking, her heart feeling as if it was flipping and twisting in her chest as she watched logan walk into the bar games room as she furrowed her eyebrows at the sight of jean following him angrily. her looking perfect as ever.

yet before y/n could think another thought she locked eyes with logan from across the room — their eyes meeting as she felt a weight lift immediately onto her as she swallowed a lump that formed in her throat at just the sight of him. it felt as if time has frozen just as they looked to each other , his eyes taking everything about her in as she did the same his way.

he practically immediately walked over, more like stomped over, as he seemed clearly agitated. more then usual as his eyes dawned onto wade and hank before resting back to y/n as he stopped in his tracks in front of the seated three.

“who thought getting a teenager shitfaced was a good idea?” logan nearly growled out, giving wade a glare as y/n’s eyes lingered back on jean who saw who he was talking to and turned away her being even more pissed then him, y/n holding the urge to go into her mind and find out why as she brung her gaze onto logan after seeing jean walk off somewhere else in the room, her patience clearly wearing thin. her wanting to make a little childish comment about how she wasn’t when wade spoke up.

“gods probably.” wade rolled out in reply as logan scoffed at what he said.

“y/n.” logan said, her eyes meeting his own as she took in his appearance. her eyes lingering on the chain that was wrapped around his neck — one he told her was something jean gave him when he first became an xmen, something he hasn’t worn in months, this fact only making her feel a number of horrible thoughts as she grabbed her drink and took a mean swig. swallowing her own building self pity as she forced a fake smile logan immediately knew to be fake.

“hi.” she said swiftly after she put her drink back down on the table — his eyebrow raising a little at her hostility as he looked to wade, hank the back to her.

“uh—“ logan spoke up, trying to find the words to say as he looked at her a bit lost for words at how she was acting as he swallowed a lump that had formed in his throat — feeling his frustration rise as he tried to control it, “where have you been?” he said lowly, hank raising his eyebrow at how this little conversation seemed weirdly tension filled. wade knew why, he could’ve called her little feelings for him back when she first met the guy but now he couldn’t help see how serious it was because off the way she was looking at him and how it was affecting her.

he couldn’t even brung himself to but in as he buried himself in his drink. hank doing the same.

“i’ve been busy. but i’ve been around— i saw you two days ago.” she said quickly, shifting in her seat a little as his eyes almost felt as if they burnt through her.

“you didn’t stay,” he said taking a pause as he looked at her, taking in just how intoxicated she seemed as he tried to analyse it, “like you uh- normally, do.”

his words touched a nerve on y/n as she felt that all familiar heart ache grow y/n trying to act as if the feeling inside her wasn’t killing her right now and ripping her to shreds as she kept her gaze on him, his eyes on her making her think and feel a number of things she hated.

“—had somewhere to be.” she replied quickly, his eyebrows raising at her bluntness to her reply as he knew something was off. he sensed it, the drunkness only adding to his worry as he went to step closer when he was cut off by a voice behind him.

y/n eyes dawned on the sight off jean, a tight silver dress on showcasing her curves as her red hair flowed down by her side as she looked at logan who hadn’t even brung himself to met her gaze yet. y/n immediately being hit with a truck load of insecurities just with a glance to the older women who had the only guy she’d ever loved wrapped around her finger.

y/n’s heart feeling as if it was stepped on as she kept her gaze on him — time feeling a little slow motion.

“logan—now.” jean said harshly.

“lo- logan.” she said again, y/n not leaving logan’s gaze as he swallowed his own spit as he eventually brung his gaze over to jean.

“logan— he knows.” she said harshly, her words a little quiet as they were clearly just meant for logan’s ears yet y/n heard them. “now! come on?” she questioned out frustratedly, saying that to grip his attention as logan looked to jean then back to y/n, wade and hank watching like it was a drama.

the air felt thick with some sort of something as y/n swallows, her eyes on him as he bit down on the inside of his cheek.

“be careful kid, remember to slow down.” he rolled out before he turned away with jean going right to her side as y/n scoffed as he walked off turning her attention back to the barmaid — not feeling logan’s eyes burning back to her as he took a long glance her way before disappearing off with jean into the party to sort whatever was happening.

y/n rolled her eyes the second she turned her attention back over to the bar as she looked down at the bar table, swallowing her thoughts down with the rest of her vodka as she felt the others eyes on her. they sensed on the tension — it was impossible not too.

“so they’re fucking again.” hank commented lowly and cluelessly. his words being like a gut punch to y/n as she bit down on her tongue as she called back over the barmaid, leaning over and ordering a couple shots as she sat back down in her seat.

“mm, most definitely.. hell for scott.” wade ushered out lowly, feeling a sense of guilt as he saw the way y/n’s eyes fell as y/n tried to mute out their conversation in the background as she welcomed the shots with open arms as she pulled the tray closer to her as she heard wade and hank whisper behind her as they leant over to gossip about the rumours of jean and scott being over as y/n’s heart felt as if it was plummeting and beating as fast as it ever had with every shot she took. the information she was hearing just making her internal pain grow worse as she tried to drink it away every shot seemingly enhancing her hurt as the metal images she were getting hurt her brain as she felt the urge to do something about it.

her mind full of relentless unlimited thoughts that were screaming at her as she placed the last empty shot glass she had down — the shots helping limit the voices to some extent as the barmaid came over and refilled them without another word most likely sensing her anguish as y/n nodded to her with as much of a smile she could muster up as she thought back to the conversation with logan.

“we’re going to dance— you coming?” wade spoke to y/n as that brung her out her gaze with the bottom of the shot glass as she shook her head, “no—thanks,” she slurred out as hank gave her a small nod and pat on the shoulder before they disappeared of into the crowd leaving her alone after saying their be right backs— her lips immediately around another glass as she finished the rest of the drinks thay were laid out in front-of her.

y/n either needed fresh air and a sick bucket or the man she loved and craved, and she was going with the latter. her desires only heightened which was making just about everything worse due to the mess the alcohol had started to cause her brain and body.

her heart pounding as she stood up, everything going messy and spin like as she stumbled through the crowd. her mind on one thing and one thing only, one person, as she got pushed around a bit by the dancing people as she made her way out the bar room she was in. her eyes searching the place as she looked for him in every corner, in every face, every person, every laugh, every grunt and every noise. she was searching for him like she had been doing within her heart ever since she’d know the man.

yet what she didn’t expect to see when she turned the corner was him right there. logan right there in his bubble of perfection as she saw it. her eyes taking him in as she saw him in the hallway — a smile joining her lips as she started to walk over to him planning what she was going to say in her brain. how she was going to do any of this? she didn’t even know what she had planned, she just wanted to speak to him. she needed to see his smile. she missed it. she wanted to make him laugh like usual, she wanted to kiss him, feel his touch. she needed it, it was destroying her to not have him. why was she ignoring him for the past two weeks? she should just tell him. nothing bad could hap—

“mine.” she swore she could make out logan saying, her eyebrows furrowing in pure confusion as she took one little step closer to where he was as her eyes dawned on a certain red head with a killer smirk on her lips as she had a tight grip on his chain.

and with that every thought she just had was crushed within the space of five or so seconds as she heard jean’s light hearted chuckle next, her voice grating against y/n’s mind as she swallowed her own spit back down as she made sure she couldn’t be seen by them. feeling the sick feeling rising in her as she watched logan’s hands wrap around jean’s waist as she pulled him closer to her in a teasing action that broke y/n’s heart in two.

she was frozen in her tracks, watching as the one she loved was with the one he loved.

“you’re mine.” ringing in her ears as she just made out what he had said to jean as his words sent a chill through y/n’s body as she felt the tears start to boil in her eyes as she couldn’t tear her eyes away from the scene. her mouth fallen gap as she watched as he roughly had her against the door jean’s hand going down to the handle of said door as y/n watched as jean pulled him in the room with her roughly.

the door slamming behind them as she felt her beating out her chest, her breath shaky and hitched as she swallowed.

and when she heard a little squeal come from the room over the music a few seconds or minutes later, she couldn’t tell how long had passed, that’s when she knew she needed to go before she turned into a public laughing stock as she turned on her heel — shakily making her way through the crowd again, unbeknownst to the tears dropping down her cheeks as she fought her way through the dancing crowd as she tried to get the hell out of here as she thought she was fighting back her emotions, yet she really wasn’t doing too good of a job with it.

“watch it!” someone yelled out over the music to y/n as she shuffled past them quickly, stumbling out and disappearing through the back door as she made her break for it. her heart feeling broken to an extreme it hadn’t felt before which was only amplified by the alcohol as she felt her brain chemistry formed for logan be destroyed within a matter of moments. seeing it in front of her own eyes being completely different from assuming it had happened.

the fact they were doing that right now she just couldn’t and didn’t want too comprehend it. it hurting her so much she felt as if she was going to be sick, she could feel it to the extremist point that when she managed her way to the end of the courtyard where her little spot was with her childhood swing set, where she’s surprised she even remembered the whereabouts off in this state, she couldn’t stop herself from leaning down into a bush shakily.

her mouth watering, her throat burning with liquid as y/n threw up into the bush her heart pounding ridiculously as she felt the tears burning against her cheek as she didn’t even notice the feeling off two strong hands holding her hair back. her body shaking as she kept being sick, feeling the acid burn her throat as she felt a strong hand round her hair pulling it into a ponytail and another hand around her fragile body to keep her up.

her body flinching a little at the touch as the person leaned a little closer as y/n was sick some more, “it’s okay—“ a low voice ushered out as y/n couldn’t help be sick again, leaning down closer into the bush nearly tripping into it as the person held her upright. their hand snacking onto her waist as y/n leaned back into their touch. basically tripping into it as she let out a shaky breath as she wiped her mouth with the sleeve of her top.

her eyes moving up onto an all familiar face and she instantly cursed in her brain as he managed to move her over to the swings, sitting her down in one of two seats as she clung to the chain of it leaning her body against it freely as she let out a little cry.

“you’re good.” scott said softly his voice low as he spoke into a comforting tone that didn’t completely soothe her as she felt the tears trail down her cheek as he kneeled down — his hands stabilising the swing that was rocking a little as he looked up at her making sure she was okay on the swing. the cold air hitting the twos faces as the moon shone down on the courtyard, the faint sound of pop music from the mansion being completely distant to both of them.

“scott.” she managed to say, him being able to tell how far gone she was by the way she slurred her words as if her crying and throwing up didn’t prove that enough. his eyes on her as he moved her hair out the way for her, tucking a strand of her hair behind her ear as she held back a little sob which wasn’t held back that well as she let out a shaky whimper.

“w-why— doesn-t he love me?” she spoke out quickly, her breath shaky and her voice high pitched as she let out little sniffles in between words, the weight of those making a sad smile tug on scott’s lips as he kept his hand on her face trying to keep her upright which was sort of impossible as he kept his comforting warm hand against her face. just trying to make her feel okay.

“—he—“ scott cut himself off before he moved closer to her, trying to keep her calm, “he does love you okay?”

y/n shook her head at scott’s words as she let out a muffled sob against her wrist, shaking her head as scott wiped the tears from her cheeks. “not like i want him to.” she rolled out in a slur, scott feeling his heart beat quicken at her little admission as if he didn’t know how she felt over him before as he moved his finger across her cheek in a soft circular motion, his hand cupping her jaw.

“hey- he does okay?” scott said quickly as he moved her jaw down so she met his eyes again, his tone soft as he moved himself to the other swing next to her — the second he was sat him moving his swing closer to her own. tangling the chains of his swing up a little in doing so.

“he does.” scott added out again, y/n not believing him at all as she swallowed a lump that had formed in her throat as she leaned herself again the hand that was cupping her face as she nearly tumbled off the swing.

her biting down on her tongue as she let out a little squeal as scott placed his hand on her back supporting and holding her up as a little chuckle left her lips as she leaned forward a little. scott not letting his hand move as worry was evident on his face as y/n turned to him a sad smile on her lips, tears still evident on her face.

“i wish.” he heard her whisper as he swallowed, his own voice breaking a little, “come on. okay? he doesn’t know what he’s missing right now.— he doesnt see you liking him.” scott said softly, giving her a little playful nudge as y/n started to lose the energy to even speak off it as she felt another tear slip down her cheek.

his words were taking the weight off her shoulders as she moved in the swing a little, scott’s comforting hand on her back which was now sort off around her waist making her sure she wasn’t going to fall as she moved a tiny bit closer to him on her swing. their swings touching a little.

“you deserve better then jean-y bitch.” she managed out lowly, scott not being able to help the chuckle that escaped his lips at how she put it as he looked out at the mansion in front of them. the moon present in his red tinted glasses.

“yeah— i’m starting to realise that.” he chuckled out as y/n gave him a drunken smile in return as she locked eyes with scott. someone she’d hardly noticed was this nice mostly due to the words logan remarked about him all the time as her smile couldn’t help but grow as she looked at him. the air softening between the two as y/n felt tiredness fall over her as she leant against the chains a little as she slowly moved her gaze over to the moon.

a few moments of silence passes before scott spoke up.

“y/n?” scott managed out trying to grab her attention as he saw he eyes wondering a bit. his eyebrows furrowing when he heard no answer in return, her silence scaring him as he nudged her.

“y/n?” he quickly said out once again, nudging her a little as he saw how limp her body was and noticed her closed eyes.

“fuck— y/n.” he ushered out quickly as he stood from his seat and went right to her side as he kneeled down, tapping her face to try and catch her attention. y/n stirring a little at his action as he stood up, pulling her up with him as he placed his hand around her waist as he tried to shake her a little which did the job as her eyes fluttered open to meet his own.

a drunken smile joining on her lips as a tear dropped down her cheek that she didn’t even notice as she chuckled a little, leaning close to him as she swayed a little.

“scott.” she said lowly as scott gave her a low chucke as she placed her arm around him drunk on, him wiping the tear of her cheek softly something he’d done a number of times since being in her presence tonight.

“okay it’s time to go sleep— im taking you to bed.” he explained softly as y/n looked at him with a little furrowed brow as he started to walk, helping her walk alongside him her hardly even able to realise she was walking as she leaned against his touch.

“you’re good.” he said calmly to her as they walked through the dark courtyard, the illuminated by the moon field of grass between them and the bustling school /xmansion being the only light to guide them. his grip on her tightening softly when she nearly tripped over her own feet, a low chuckle escaping his lips as he realised just how long of a walk it was to the mansion. him sighing as he held her upright. “nearly there.” he muffled out as y/n leaned to him.

“—‘m gonna be sick.” she quickly flushed out before throwing her head over in the other direction as scott patted her back and stopped in his tracks at her words as she was sick again — him holding the urge got to be sick too because the smell as he focused on helping her. his heart skipping a beat bit as he felt his anger growing over logan putting her in this situation where she was so drunk she was being sick or the fact that she was being sick just thinking about logan it made his blood boil as he felt his jaw clench — his eyebrows twitching as he helped her get it all out, whispering little comforts as he soothed her back.

“good girl. “ he said lowly as y/n brung her gaze into him once more him giving her a small sad smile as he placed his hand back around her waist to guide her, “cmon, bed.” he whispered out to her as they started walking again. having to go through the party definitely going to be a difficult task as scott tightened his grip around her waist as they walked past a couple people hanging around the outside area of the building as the music met y/n’s ears as once they got into the building scott called for people to move out the way as he made y/n stay close to him. her eyes wondering over everyone in her drunken haze as scott helped her over to the staircase which was through a couple wide, filled rooms.

her swearing she came across wade and hank in the corner with two twins and colossus’s doing a certain something to wade, her eyebrows furrowing at what she believed to have just seen as she shook it off as she met scott’s words.

“you need to be carried or are you okay?” scott asked as if he was babying her which sent a wave of comfort through her body as she let the question hang in her brain as she tried to form answer to it as she leaned herself against scott.

“‘u—‘i can—“

“scarlett?” logan roughly called out in a raised voice towards scott as he came over out of nowhere. scott rolling his eyes as he quickly picked y/n up, y/n being in scott’s arms as her eyes fluttered open to see logan to the side of them. scott’s jaw immediately clenching as he continued up the stairs without cracking a word to logan as he rushed after the pair. his own anger frustratingly high as he tried to control himself and stop himself from doing anything stupid.

“scott?” logan said harshly, his anger growing as he didn’t get an answer as he tried to get the man to look at him.

“lo-“ y/n slipped out, her voice muffled as she leaned into scott’s arms more as he carried her bridal style up the stairs. her realising his presence, logan’s eyes casting onto y/n and then back to scott. his eyes darkening.

“what have you done to her?!” logan rushed out, his voice cracking with worry as scott ignored his words as he made it to the top of the stairs and continued on down to where he’s pretty sure her room is.

“scott!” logan shouted again trying to get his attention as scott opened the door with his back, giving logan a harsh glare as he walked right over to the bed where he placed y/n down carefully on it. her drunken self pouring the cover over her figure as she rolled over in bed. letting out a little muffled whimper as her head laid on the pillow.

the second scott having let go off y/n he immediately turned to logan scott not giving logan another chance to talk before he connected his fist with his jaw, logan been taken aback a little as he raised an eyebrow, scott looking right at him as logan pushed him back harshly.

“what the fuck did you do?” logan cursed out quickly, scott scoffing as he held back taking his glasses off because of the fact it was a party, not logan’s funeral even despite how much he wanted it to be.

“you should ask yourself that, prick.” scott said harshly. logan’s eyebrows raising at his words as scott pushed himself past logan without another word.

logan immediately grabbing scott’s arm harshly, his claws aching to come out as he met his gaze.

“what do you mean by that?” logan said quickly, his eyes locked onto scott’s as so many questions flowed his brain. his thoughts enlaced with y/n and the worry he had for the girl as scott harshly brung his hand back to his side after shaking logan’s grip off — giving logan a stern look as he looked him up and down judgementally, “god, you are so stupid. you’d think being born in the 19th century would make you slightly smarter then a twenty nine year old.” scott scoffed out lowly, his words only angering logan more as he shoved scott against the wall.

his claws extending as he pressed them close to his throat — his threat there as scott swallowed.

“tell me.” he said harshly as scott couldn’t help a certain look cross his face. completely frustrated by logan, his heart aching for jean in this moment as he stared at what she had clearly picked over himself that enraging him yet also y/n and what she had just gone through herself. the heart ache something he could relate too and he wouldn’t wish that on anyone. yet right now he would logan however.

“she saw you and jean you idiot. meaning i did too. meaning— fuck you.” scott said quickly as he clicked his visor getting the right aim, logan jumping back as scott lazered his chest. his beam going right through as a loud grunt escaped his lips as logan in immediate retaliation clawed scott in the side, scott pushing back the whimper threatening to leave his lips as logan as he got ready to take another shot at the man.

logan raising his eyebrow as the two stared eachother down, “i’ll heal,” logan rolled out his words only angering scott worse as he went to raise his glasses again as logan roughly placed his hand on his chest to stop him, his claws retracted back in.

“i wish you wouldn’t.” scott bit out harshly as logan scoffed at his words, keeping his anger limited as he rolled his eyes.

“jean only needed someone to talk too—“

“you mean fuck.” scott said out harshly, jean crossing logan’s mind as his jaw clenched his gaze darkening as he couldn’t bring himself to shake his head. not that he was thinking about scott’s feelings — right now his mind pondering on another.

scott saw how logan couldn’t even fight back with words — tutting as he pushed him back. logan’s hands falling to his side as the two didn’t break eye contact.

“you know we’re engaged.” scott spit out like venom, his words causing a look of surprise to wash over logan’s face as his mouth fell open, “well we were.” he added out.

“you were— what?” logan fumbled out, confusion written on his face as scott rolled his eyes at his reaction. not that he cared deep down, but it felt like he did right now.

“great.. she didn’t tell you. like she didn’t tell anyone,” he said lowly, “not that it makes it any better what you’ve done,” scott casted out as a few seconds finding passed as he tried to find the words which only come out anger filled, “she’s a caniving cheating bitch.” scott cursed out, logan not bringing himself to react to the words scott ushered about jean as he looked at scott.

logan was about to say something to scott when the sound of y/n’s soft little snores filled the room which made the tension even higher as scott and logan glared at eachother.

“maybe just think next time before you fuck someone else’s girl, again.” scott managed out as he pushed past logan to leave the room.

“i don’t think she’s your girl.” logan called back out before he left as scott’s jaw clenched at his words as he opened the door.

“not anymore. you can have her.” he said harshly as he paused as he knew he had to say something.

“—just think about how y/n feels, because i know hurts.” scott spoke lowly as he left without another word clearly implying a certain fact.

logans heart skipped a beat at his words as the door shut behind scott, his mind feeling as if it was in a war as the tension built in the room immediately. the air feeling thick as he swallowed his own spit not bringing himself to call something back to him as his words couldn’t even bring themselves to form right in his brain yet alone out loud.

his eyes dawned back onto the sleeping girl y/n laying there. looking so soft and innocent, completely sound asleep and his heart couldn’t help twang a little as he bit down on the inside of his cheek — many bustling thoughts cursing his brain as he wished he had never thought of them.

his mind lingering on the thought of jean and what just occurred within him and scott as he came down from the pain that was inflicted on him his chest rising rapidly to a more normal flow as he healed. as he focused his gaze on y/n as he furrowed his eyebrows over what scott had said, trying to wrap his brain around it.

logan’s eyes dawning on y/n. guilt seeping through him as he felt his heart gain that aching feeling y/n had been riddled with since the day she first realised she was in love with the man as he sat on the foot of the bed. his mind feeling melted as he placed his hand on her own his big, gruff and rough feeling hand taking the soft touch of her hand into his own grip. her hand being half if not less of his size as he soothed her. her touch being another level of comfort he didn’t recall experiencing since he was a young boy that feeling sending memories flooding through his brain he couldn’t focus on now.

feeling all the emotions boiling up he’d been fighting to push down as he looked down at her asleep body. what was all of this? she had been distant, almost rude and very cold and scott’s words were making that why question he had on his mind for the past two weeks clearer.

the implication of scott’s words hung in his mind as he looked at her. him eventually bringing himself over to the spare place next to her in the bed not wanting to leave her alone for the night too worried about how drunk she was and if anything could happen in the night.. or anyone else drunkily walking in. but he couldn’t help deep down in knowing that those were just excuses to stay within her presence. asleep or not.

carefully building a gap between the two of them as he laid down — no matter how strong the urge to hug her and comfort her was — as he let out a rough exhale as he closed his eyes.

only to open them three seconds later to look at her. his eyes not leaving her peacefully asleep body for the rest of the night.

[levanterhaze]

── GAMEBOY, BANGCHAN

♡  ― 󠀬󠀬 fratboy!bangchan x f!reader dirty talk, masturbation, rough sex, slight choking, use of nicknames, overstimulation among other things I can't even name

♡ synopsis ― Bangchan is the campus playboy—charming, cocky, and infuriatingly irresistible. One reckless, drunken night leads to a secret you swore you'd never have. Now, hating him is harder than keeping him your dirty little secret.

[10k words ]♡― once again, I must thank you all for your love and for continuing to enjoy gameboy! this chapter is a bit long, but for me it's interesting to write the development of the characters to get where we want to go! don't forget to listen to the playlist and those who just got here PLEASE READ THE PREVIOUS CHAPTERS!!!! that said, have a good read.

♡― THE PLAYLIST.

♡ [part one] ♡ [part two] ♡ [part three] ♡ [part four]

On the corner of my bed Oh, and maybe on the beach You could do it on your own While you're lookin' at me

After absolutely killing your performance of Out Here On My Own, the applause hit you like a tidal wave. A standing ovation. Even Mrs. Baek looked mildly impressed, which, considering her usual stone-cold demeanor, basically meant she was internally sobbing.

And just like that, all the nerves? Gone. Vanished into thin air like they were never even there.

Bangchan had been watching—because of course, he had—but before you could revel in that fact for too long, he got a call and had to bounce. Typical.

You should have been freaking out about the whole making out backstage situation. Should’ve been scanning every corner for witnesses, mentally preparing for a campus-wide scandal. But weirdly? You weren’t. That reckless, confident part of you—the one still floating on cloud nine—did not care. If anything, you could still feel him. His touch on your waist like a phantom burn, his lips still branded on yours.

But whatever. You had bigger things to stress about. The final list wasn’t coming out until Monday, which meant you had the entire weekend to sit in pure, unfiltered agony over it. Luckily, Saturday’s party was the perfect excuse to get out of your head for a while.

Fast forward through a day of pretending to be studious with Sohee—aka desperately trying to focus while your brain replayed that kiss—you finally took a well-earned shower and decided to go for a solo nighttime stroll. 

Campus was still alive, students buzzing around in little clusters, laughing and talking like they didn’t have impending deadlines. You shoved your headphones in, following the athletics track, which was mostly empty by now.

The night air had that perfect, crisp breeze—the kind that made you grateful you threw on a cardigan. And just when you thought the moment couldn’t get any better, Wonderwall started playing. You smirked to yourself. Damn, you loved this song.

And yet, with every step, your brain kept poking at you like an annoying little sibling. Anxiety, sure. But let’s not forget the other mess currently occupying premium real estate in your mind—Hyunjin.

You hadn’t talked to him since you drunkenly spilled your guts, quite literally, about your whole Bangchan situation. And if you were being honest, which you weren’t, at least not with yourself, you were actively dodging that conversation. Because talking to Hyunjin meant facing your own feelings, and frankly, you were not clocked in for that emotional labor.

Your phone lit up mid-walk.

Mingyu: can I see you today?

You chewed on your lip, staring at the message. It was almost ridiculous how this boy—new, uncomplicated, and seemingly sincere—wanted something real with you. And yet, here you were, hesitating. Because no matter how nice Mingyu was, your brain wasn’t stuck on him.

It was stuck on someone else.

On a certain maddening, frustrating, insanely good kisser who had, at some point, tattooed himself onto your skin. If physical touch could be permanent, Bangchan’s hands would be everywhere on you. And, let’s be honest, you wouldn’t exactly be filing a complaint about it.

Before you even processed the decision, your feet had already made it for you. You were crossing campus, heading straight for his dorm.

Because you needed to talk. Like adults. No teasing, no sarcastic little jabs—just honesty.

And, okay, maybe you needed to see him, too. Feel him. More than ever.

Your determination was fuel to the fire already burning inside you. Your heart was pounding, your brain was screaming at you to calm down, but your body wasn’t taking any orders tonight. That feverish, all-consuming pull settled deep in your gut, an intoxicating mix of adrenaline, nerves, and something terrifyingly real.

You took the stairs two at a time, like the damn dorm might vanish before you got there.

By the time you reached his door, you were clutching your excitement close, biting back a smile even as your fingers trembled. Deep breath. You knocked, quick and sure.

It’s fine. He’ll listen. You’ll talk. You’ll finally—

The door swung open.

And instead of a tall, dark-haired boy, you were met with her.

She was pretty. Unfairly, effortlessly pretty—the kind of girl who belonged on magazine covers and in the daydreams of poets. Medium height, light hair, bright eyes. The kind of face men went to war over.

Your stomach dropped like a stone.

“Hi!” she greeted, all warmth and ease, completely oblivious to the way the air had just been sucked out of your lungs.

You swallowed, forcing a polite nod. “Uh, hey… is Bangchan here?”

She shook her head, smiling like this was just any other casual conversation. And that’s when you noticed it—his black t-shirt, draped over her frame.

“Oh, no. He went to grab some food.” she tilted her head, something curious in her gaze. “Are you a friend of his? Oh! Sorry—I’m Yeojin. His girlfriend. And you are…?”

Her words hit like a gut punch, sucking the warmth right out of your chest.

A bitter laugh bubbled up, but you swallowed it down, masking the sting with a tight-lipped smile. “A classmate,” you said smoothly. “I just had a question, but… I think it can wait till Monday.”

And just like that, the fire inside you? Extinguished.

The girl pursed her glossy lips, then nodded politely. “Okay. I’ll let him know you stopped by.”

“No need.” the words left your mouth before she could even finish. “Thanks, Yeojin.”

Her name felt like venom rolling off your tongue, thick and bitter, coating your mouth with something vile.

By the time you hit the stairs, you were moving so fast you were honestly surprised you didn’t wipe out. Your pulse was a hammer against your ribs, your breath uneven. Your brain hadn’t even caught up yet—stuck on a loop, trying to process the absolute train wreck that had just unfolded.

He had a girlfriend this whole time.

He lied to you.

He did exactly what everyone said he would.

The sharp sting of disappointment curdled into full-blown anger. Your steps turned heavier, each one smacking against the pavement like a silent war drum. You were so locked into getting to your dorm—so wound up with the need to disappear into your own space—you probably would’ve plowed through half a dozen people without a second thought.

But fate had a sick sense of humor. Because halfway across campus, you spotted him.

Bangchan, heading back toward the dorms, a paper bag dangling from his hand—food, obviously, because why wouldn’t he be casually picking up dinner while your world imploded?

His eyes lit up the second he saw you, but that moment of warmth flickered out fast when you didn’t even look at him. Didn’t slow down. Didn’t hesitate. Just walked right past him like he was nothing—like he was air—nearly clipping his arm in the process.

He stood there for two seconds, frozen, before spinning around. Your name tore from his lips, sharp and urgent.

“What happened?” when you didn’t answer, his voice shot up, strained. “Where are you going?”

You sucked in a deep breath, your whole body practically vibrating with anger. Then, before you could stop yourself, you spun around and marched right back toward him, each step digging into the grass like you were stomping out a fire.

“To my dorm,” you snapped. “Not that it’s any of your business. Oh, and fun fact—I just came back from yours.” sarcasm dripped from your voice like honey laced with poison.

Bangchan blinked, his brain buffering like a slow-loading webpage. The look on his face almost made you laugh—almost. Instead, you just smiled, sharp and humorless. Yeah, process that, asshole.

You turned to leave, but before you could, his hand caught yours. Not your wrist, like some desperate last-ditch grab—your hand. Like he meant it. And the second your skin met his, it was like touching an open flame.

“Let me explain.” his voice was tight, urgent.

“Don’t touch me.” you yanked your hand back like it burned. “I don’t give a shit about whatever excuse you’re about to pull out of your ass.”

His jaw clenched. “Can you stop being so damn stubborn and just listen to me for once?”

You let out a sharp, humorless laugh. “Oh, you wanna explain?” you licked your lips, tasting nothing but bitterness. “Go ahead. Explain how you had a girlfriend this whole time while you were fucking around with me.”

The words landed like a punch to the gut—on both of you.

Because, deep down, being with you had never been defined. No labels. No promises. No safety net to fall back on. But that didn’t make it hurt any less.

Bangchan’s brows snapped together. “What? What the fuck are you talking about?”

“Oh, don’t even try it.” you scoffed, shaking your head. “You’re really gonna stand there and lie to my face? I saw her.”

His frustration bubbled over, his arms flying up in exasperation. “I genuinely have no idea what the fuck you’re talking about.” his voice cracked with frustration. He looked at you like he was praying for some divine intervention to make sense of this mess. “If you’re talking about—”

“Just go back to your girlfriend and leave me alone, Bangchan.” your voice was steady, but he wasn’t stupid—he saw the fire still burning in your eyes, catching in the moonlight.

And maybe if he had taken half a second to think, he wouldn’t have said it. Maybe he would’ve swallowed his pride and stopped himself from making it worse.

But he didn’t.

“Whatever, right?” he scoffed, voice laced with something bitter. “It’s not like we were anything.”

You pressed your lips together, jaw tight, throat burning like you’d swallowed glass. And for the first time in your life, really the first, you felt so humiliated—so stupid—that your eyes burned with unshed tears.

Bangchan saw it. Saw the way your waterline glistened, saw the way your breath hitched, but you wouldn’t cry. Not in front of him. Not for him.

“If you really think that’s the problem, then that says a whole lot more about you than it does about me.” your voice was sharp, but quiet, like a blade sliding back into its sheath.

And just like that, the conversation was over.

You turned on your heel and walked away, each step fueled by a firestorm of anger, hurt, and something else you weren’t ready to name. Bangchan watched you go, standing frozen in place, and by the time he even thought about stopping you—

It was too late.

Outside your dorm, you yanked your phone out of your pocket, fingers flying across the screen like a woman on a mission. Your pulse was still hammering, adrenaline buzzing under your skin as you pulled up Mingyu’s contact and typed without hesitation.

You: Feel like crashing a party on Saturday?

Barely a beat passed before your phone vibrated with his response.

Mingyu: You had me at “party.”

Bangchan pushed open the door to his dorm with more force than necessary, letting it slam shut behind him. His pulse was still racing, his jaw tight with frustration.

And there she was. Yeojin.

Lying on his bed, scrolling through her phone like she owned the place. His old sweatshirt was hanging off her shoulder, and she barely spared him a glance when he walked in.

“Oh, you’re back,” she said, swinging her legs idly. “Didn’t take you long.”

Bangchan set his bag of takeout on the desk and exhaled sharply through his nose. “What the hell did you say to her?”

Yeojin finally looked up, her expression the perfect blend of innocence and amusement. “Say what exactly?”

His fingers flexed at his sides. “You know what,” he ground out. “You told her we’re together. Why?”

She tilted her head, brows lifting. “I never said that.”

Bangchan let out a humorless laugh, running a hand through his hair. “Yeojin, don’t play games with me.”

“I didn’t, Chan.” she sighed dramatically, stretching her arms over her head. “She asked if you were here, I said no, and I introduced myself. It’s not my fault if she jumped to conclusions.”

He clenched his jaw, glaring at her. “That’s bullshit and you know it.”

She just smiled. “So what if it is?” her voice dropped, teasing, as she sat up. “You used to like when I messed with people.”

Bangchan took a step back when she reached for him, his whole body recoiling instinctively.

“We’re not kids anymore, Yeojin,” he muttered. “And I don’t have time for this.” he grabbed his jacket and headed for the door. “I got Thai food. Help yourself.”

Before she could say anything else, he was gone.

The cool night air did little to calm Bangchan’s nerves as he walked toward the basketball court, fists shoved in his hoodie pockets. His mind was a mess, replaying the way you had looked at him—like he was exactly what people warned you about.

Before he could spiral further, a familiar voice cut through his thoughts.

“Damn, what’s with the face?” Changbin asked, appearing from the other side of the path. “You look like you wanna punch a hole in a wall.”

Bangchan exhaled sharply. “Not a wall.”

Changbin frowned. “What the hell happened?”

Bangchan hesitated before tilting his head toward the court. “Basketball first. Talking later.”

Changbin smirked. “I like where this is going.”

Fifteen minutes later, Bangchan sat on the edge of the basketball court, legs stretched out, elbows resting on his knees, looking like life had personally drop-kicked him.

Across from him, Changbin dribbled the ball lazily, waiting. And waiting. Until his patience ran out.

“So?” Changbin finally asked, passing him the ball. “Spill.”

Bangchan caught it, staring at it for a second before shaking his head. “Yeojin’s here.”

Changbin nearly fumbled the rebound. “I’m sorry—what?” his face twisted in immediate disgust. “What the hell is she doing here?”

Bangchan sighed. “She came to visit. Said she was in town. It’s been years, and I figured—whatever, right? No harm in catching up.”

Changbin let out a dry laugh. “No harm? Bro, she’s a walking red flag. Why would you even entertain that?”

Bangchan pressed his tongue against his cheek. “I don’t know, man. Nostalgia? I mean, we didn’t exactly end badly, we just—” he sighed. “Didn’t work.”

Changbin scoffed. “Yeah, well, I never liked her. You know that.” 

Bangchan dribbled once, then tossed the ball toward the hoop. It hit the rim, circled, then dropped through the net. “There’s more.”

Changbin folded his arms. “Yeah, no shit. You’re sitting here like you just found out Santa isn’t real. What else happened?”

Bangchan caught the rebound and exhaled. “She saw.”

Changbin frowned. “Saw what?”

Bangchan gave him a look.

“Oh.” Changbin winced. “Shit.” he let out a slow whistle. “That’s… bad.”

“No shit,” Bangchan muttered, dragging a hand through his hair. “She showed up at my dorm, and instead of me opening the door, Yeojin did.”

Changbin groaned. “Dude. No.”

“Oh, it gets worse,” Bangchan went on, voice dripping with frustration. “Yeojin, being the manipulative little menace she is, basically introduced herself as my girlfriend.”

Changbin stared at him like he just admitted to murder. “And she believed that?”

Bangchan laughed bitterly. “Why wouldn’t she? The look she gave me, man… like I was exactly what she expected. Some asshole playing games.”

Changbin studied him for a second. “And that bothers you.”

Bangchan scoffed. “Of course it fucking bothers me.” he leaned forward, gripping the ball tight. “She drives me insane, Bin. Like—she acts like it’s nothing. Like whatever we had was just this casual, meaningless thing. But then she turns around and—” he exhaled sharply. “Her actions say otherwise. She looks at me like she feels something. She reacts like she cares. But every time I get close, she shuts it down.”

Changbin snorted, rolling the ball between his palms. “So basically, she’s bullshitting, you’re bullshitting, and now you’re both miserable?”

Bangchan shot him a glare.

Changbin smirked. “I mean, she won’t admit she likes you, and you’re sitting here trauma-dumping on me instead of doing something about it.”

Bangchan groaned, tilting his head back against the wall. “She’s pissed, Bin. Like, really pissed.”

“So fix it.”

Bangchan laughed humorlessly. “Yeah. Easier said than done.”

Changbin passed him the ball. “So what now?”

Bangchan caught it, staring down at the faded lettering on the rubber. That was the question, wasn’t it? Because right now, you wanted nothing to do with him.

And honestly? He deserved it.

Saturday morning. Group breakfast. Good vibes. At least, that’s what you were aiming for.

You were mid-story, telling Felix how the auditions had gone, when the universe decided to test your patience. Again.

Changbin strolled in with Jisung, Bangchan, and—you had to blink twice just to confirm—Yeojin.

Of course. Because it wasn’t enough that he lied. He had to parade it around like some kind of grand event.

“I need a fat slice of chocolate cake,” Changbin announced, dropping into his seat. “Something sweet to cleanse the absolute trash energy in the air.”

Your eyes flicked to Yeojin, who was standing a little too comfortably next to Bangchan. 

“Yeojin, long time no see,” Hyunjin greeted, all polite and civil.

She beamed. “Hyunjin! Oh my God, it’s really you!” she gushed, voice dripping with enthusiasm. You wanted to be a girl’s girl, really—you did. But something about her tone made your eye twitch.

“Who’s that?” Sohee whispered, not even bothering to be discreet.

“Oh, nice to meet you,” Yeojin said, flashing a smile that felt way too rehearsed. “Yeojin. Chan’s friend.”

She said it like she was accepting a damn award. The table went dead silent. Everyone shared a look.

You, however, remained completely unbothered, taking a slow sip of your strawberry milk like you had all the time in the world.

Bangchan slid into the seat across from you, throwing not-so-subtle glances in your direction—just in case you maybe wanted to acknowledge his existence.

You didn’t. Instead, you busied yourself with literally anything else. The napkins. The straw in your drink. The slow, satisfying process of ignoring him.

If he wanted your attention, he’d have to earn it.

Yeojin was annoyingly easy to get along with. Effortless charm, perfectly timed laughs—like she’d studied the art of socializing and graduated top of her class. And maybe that wouldn’t have bothered you if you didn’t feel an immediate, inexplicable urge to dislike her.

Maybe it was the way she smiled just a little too much. Like she was in on some inside joke that no one else was laughing at. Or how she leaned into Bangchan like he had his own gravitational pull, always conveniently this close to falling into his lap.

For someone who had been so desperate to explain himself last night, he looked awfully comfortable letting her cling to him now.

“So, everyone’s going tonight, right?” Jisung asked, drumming his fingers on the table.

Yeojin jumped on the conversation like it was an open invitation. “What’s tonight?”

“Jisung’s DJing at a party,” Eunji answered, taking a sip of her drink.

Yeojin hummed, tilting her head in that thoughtful but not really way. “I was going to leave after lunch, but… I guess I can stay a little longer.”

She glanced at Bangchan like she was waiting for permission.

Too bad he wasn’t paying attention. His focus was glued to his phone, fingers tapping out a message.

Your own phone buzzed in your pocket.

Bangchan: can we talk?

Your eyes flicked up, purely on instinct. And there he was. Watching you.

You frowned, pulled out your phone, read the message, and stuffed it right back in your pocket. No response.

The table blurred into background noise. Laughter, conversation, the occasional clatter of silverware—it all melted into static. Because Bangchan was still looking. That steady, expectant stare that made your skin itch. That made your chest feel a little too tight.

Your phone buzzed again.

Bangchan: you can’t ignore me forever.

Bet.

You smirked to yourself. If Bangchan thought he could tell you what to do, he had another thing coming.

Grabbing the strap of your bag, you stood up, all casual confidence, and turned to Sohee and Eunji. “I’m heading out with Hyunjin.” no further explanation. Just a statement.

Hyunjin, caught in the crossfire of whatever this was, frowned. “Wait—what? Since when?”

You just kept walking, tossing a grin over your shoulder. “Since right now. Just smile and act natural.”

 You made sure to take the long way around the table, passing directly in front of Bangchan—not looking at him. Not even a flicker of acknowledgment. Just air.

Hyunjin, still struggling to keep up, shot a quick glance back before leaning in. “Okay, seriously, what was that? Bangchan looked like he was about to start breathing fire.”

You flicked your hair over your shoulder, your smirk widening.

“Revenge, Hyun. Just a little harmless revenge.”

The house was packed.

Neon lights flickered wildly, splashing the room in chaotic waves of electric blue and fiery red, pulsing in sync with the bass. The air was thick—heat, sweat, cheap cologne, and the sharp sting of alcohol weaving together into something intoxicating. The floor thrummed beneath your boots, bodies moving in effortless rhythm, a silent agreement to just let go.

Jisung was at the DJ booth, throwing in ad-libs between transitions, hyping up the crowd like he was born for this. A remix dropped, shaking the walls, and the entire party roared in approval. Off-campus ragers had a way of making reality blur, like stepping into a fever dream.

Perfect.

Eunji and Sohee spotted you first, their eyes going comically wide, like they’d just witnessed the second coming of Christ.

“Jesus, look at you,” Sohee gasped, gripping your arm for dear life.

Eunji gave a solemn nod. “This outfit should be illegal.”

You twirled, just enough to let your skirt flare out, a little reminder of why you picked it.

“Drinks first, right?” you pointed at Hyunjin, who gave you an approving nod.

You peeled away from the group, squeezing through the sweaty crowd toward a corner where a massive keg stood like a beacon of bad decisions. There were stronger drinks, but you decided to take it easy—for now.

Then, in half a second, you felt it. Like your body already knew, like a moth drawn to a flame.

Under the pulsing red lights, he looked dangerous. A predator in slow motion, moving through the crowd with that effortless, lazy confidence that made people either run toward him or clear a path. Flashes of white and blue caught the sharp cut of his jaw, the faint sheen of sweat at his collarbone. A contrast—razor-edged and infuriatingly soft all at once.

And yet. You couldn’t focus on any of that.

Because Yeojin was practically clinging to him.

Talking—laughing, leaning, performing—but Bangchan barely seemed to notice. If anything, he looked somewhere else entirely. Somewhere you were. Because the second your eyes met, his focus locked in.

And he started moving. One step. Then another.

But before he could take a third, an arm slid around your waist.

Mingyu.

His touch was warm, firm—a perfectly timed lifeline. His lips brushed against your ear, voice low and deliberate. “Have I mentioned you look insane tonight?”

A slow, satisfied smile curled on your lips. Perfect.

Through the neon haze, you caught Bangchan’s reaction over Mingyu’s shoulder. Electric blue light flickered across his face like something straight out of a movie scene.

Oh, he was pissed. Not just annoyed. Not just irritated. Seething.

Jaw clenched. Shoulders tight. Eyes locked onto you with an intensity that sent a delicious shiver down your spine.

Good.

Mingyu pulled back just enough to meet your gaze. “Dance with me?”

You let the question hang, stretching the moment just because you could—fully aware of your audience. Then, with a casual flick of your fingers, you grabbed Mingyu’s wrist and turned back to your friends.

And that’s when the remix hit.

The song of the summer. A full-blown club anthem blasted through the house, lights flashing in sync with the bass, and suddenly Eunji and Sohee were dragging you onto the dance floor. You barely had time to toss Mingyu a look before pulling him into the crowd with you.

Sohee was already wrapped around her boyfriend’s neck, hair flying as she danced like she was possessed, while Minho just laughed at her antics. Jisung was losing his mind behind the DJ booth, hyping up the party like a man on a mission.

And Bangchan? He didn’t move. He just watched.

Watched as you danced. Watched as Mingyu’s hands found your waist. Watched as you threw your head back, laughing, moving with the beat like you had nothing to prove.

And under the pulsing red lights, with silver glitter catching on your cheekbones, you didn’t just look good. You looked untouchable.

And he looked like a man about to start a war.

You spun around, arms draped over Mingyu’s shoulders as his hands trailed down to your waist, pulling you into the rhythm. To anyone watching, you two looked dangerously close—every move synced, every touch easy, like this was something more than just a party moment. But in the back of your mind, a small, annoying voice reminded you that this wasn’t about Mingyu at all.

Still, too late now.

The strobe lights flashed in bursts, making everything feel like a glitch in time—jumping, dancing, bodies moving like there was no tomorrow. You lost sight of Bangchan for a while, which was probably for the best. So, you let go. Had fun. Actually enjoyed yourself with your friends.

Until someone slammed into you, knocking the air right out of your lungs.

One second, Mingyu was right there. The next, he was gone, practically launched across the floor. “What the—” you barely got the words out before you saw the damage.

Changbin stood there, wide-eyed, drenched in a suspiciously pink drink, looking like he just survived a battlefield. And Mingyu? Equally soaked, equally stunned, like he was still processing what the hell just happened.

“Dude, shit—sorry!” Changbin shouted, voice barely cutting through the music.

You blinked, taking in the absolute mess before turning back to him. “Are you good?”

Changbin nodded rapidly, looking between you and Mingyu like he wasn’t sure whether to laugh or start running. “Yeah, yeah, my bad!”

Then he turned back to Mingyu, hands up like a man pleading for his life.

Mingyu just let out a sigh, lifting the hem of his now ruined white T-shirt like he was mourning a fallen soldier. “Alright. I’ll be right back,” he said, shaking his head before disappearing into the crowd.

Meanwhile, Changbin grabbed your arm, his expression serious—well, as serious as someone drenched in a neon-pink drink could look. He gestured for you to follow, weaving through the bodies until you reached the foot of the stairs.

“What?” you asked, crossing your arms.

“Can you grab me a shirt? I left one in Jisung’s backpack.”

You took a second to assess the situation. Changbin, slightly tipsy, covered in pink, blinking at you like a lost puppy. He looked ridiculous.

With a dramatic sigh, you caved. “Fine.”

“You’re the best,” he said, clasping his hands like he was praising the heavens. “It’s in the room on the right, upstairs.”

You turned, climbing the stairs while dodging couples making out on the steps like it was some kind of kissing marathon. Once you reached the hallway, you scanned the doors—long corridor, a few rooms—until you spotted one slightly open on the right.

Alright. In and out. Quick mission.

Stepping inside, you started searching for Jisung’s bag—first the floor, then the bed. Nothing.

And then—

Movement.

From the corner of your eye, a figure emerged from behind the bed, rising like a shadow from the dark.

Your breath caught. Bangchan. Standing there. Watching you.

A black cable twirled between his fingers, slow and deliberate, his gaze unreadable under the dim glow of the hallway lights.

“What?” you were the first to break the silence, arms crossing instinctively. “What the hell are you doing here?”

Bangchan gave you a flat look, holding up the black cable like it was evidence in court. “I should be asking you that. I came to get Han’s charger.” he raised an eyebrow, gaze sharp, like he wasn’t entirely convinced.

You opened your mouth, fully prepared to deliver something scathing—but before you could get a word out, the door swung open again.

“Sorry, kids! Not opening this door until you sort yourselves out!”

You barely had time to process Changbin’s smug, drunken grin before the door slammed shut.

For half a second, you froze.

Then you launched at the door, fists pounding like you could open it through sheer rage. “Changbin, open this fucking door right now!”

No answer. Just the distant thrum of music, too muffled for anyone outside to hear you scream bloody murder.

You yanked at the handle—definitely locked.

With a sharp inhale, you turned, glaring daggers at Bangchan, who was just… standing there. Watching. Amused.

“Are you just gonna stand there? Do something!”

His lips twitched, like he was this close to laughing. “Pretty sure this is your problem, not mine.��

You narrowed your eyes. “Oh, so now you don’t wanna get involved?”

Bangchan sighed—slow, exaggerated—before strolling up to the door, resting a lazy hand on the knob, and giving it a completely useless jiggle. Then he turned back to you with a straight face.

“Yeah. It’s locked.”

You stared at him. Blinked. Then scoffed so hard you nearly choked.

“No shit, Sherlock. Are you serious?”

Bangchan couldn’t help it—he laughed. Because you were spiraling, and honestly? It was funny as hell.

“I’ll call him,” he said, still smirking.

You rolled your eyes so hard they nearly left your skull and made your way over to the double bed in the corner. “You’ve got to be kidding me,” you muttered, collapsing onto the edge like this was some Shakespearean tragedy.

Then a thought clicked, and suddenly, everything made sense.

Your head snapped up. “Wait—” you shot to your feet, eyes narrowing. “He knows. You told him.”

Bangchan barely looked fazed. “He kinda figured it out on his own, if that makes you feel any better.”

Which wasn’t exactly a lie. Bangchan was so into you, stealing glances constantly, and Changbin wasn’t stupid. The man could read a room like it was his job.

You dragged a hand down your face, exhaling sharply. “This is a nightmare.”

Bangchan tilted his head, amused. “Jesus, is it really that bad being stuck in here with me? Last time, you weren’t exactly complaining.”

The second those words left his mouth, you hit him with a look so deadly he immediately shut up.

“Just get Changbin to open the damn door, Bangchan,” you said flatly, plopping back down onto the bed, dead center, legs crossed like you were settling in for a long, miserable wait.

You pulled out your phone, thumbs flying across the screen as you sent a message to Hyunjin—the only person who knew about the whole situation. You could have asked Sohee, Eunji, or even Mingyu, but that would just open a very annoying can of worms.

And you were not in the mood for questions.

This couldn’t be real. No way. The second you got out of here, Changbin was getting his ass handed to him. And Mingyu was probably already wondering where the hell you’d disappeared to. Just like Yeojin was probably searching for Bangchan.

Perfect.

“He’s not answering,” Bangchan announced, completely unfazed. “Which means he’s ignoring me on purpose. So, we wait.” he sat by the window like it was just another Tuesday, leaning back on his palms.

“This is your fault.”

That earned you a scoff. “How the hell is this my fault?”

You shot him a glare. “If you hadn’t spilled everything to him, none of this would be happening.”

Bangchan let out a dry laugh, tilting his head like you were so predictable. “Right. And if you hadn’t jumped to conclusions without actually listening to me—like you always do—none of this would be happening either.”

Oof. Direct hit. You hated when he had a point.

“I have nothing to hear from you,” you muttered, crossing your arms and staring at literally anything else in the room.

Silence.

Annoyingly, maddeningly, deafeningly loud silence.

Bangchan rested his arms on his knees, watching you like he had all the time in the world. And pretending he wasn’t there, yeah, that was a joke. His presence was like gravity—pulling, heavy, impossible to ignore.

Less than ten minutes passed before the anger started simmering down. Because that’s how it always went with him. Like a fire that burned too hot, too fast.

“You seriously thought she was my girlfriend?”

You turned, locking eyes with him. “What else was I supposed to think? She said it herself.”

Bangchan hummed, tapping his fingers against his knee. “She’s not. Yeojin’s an ex—from high school. Ancient history.” he exhaled sharply through his teeth. “She’s just… a little clueless.”

“A little?” you let out a sharp laugh. “She was wearing your clothes when I showed up at your dorm.” you rolled your eyes, but Bangchan only smiled. Because, yeah, that sounded a whole lot like jealousy.

Then something clicked. “Wait—what were you doing there that night?”

“Nothing.” you looked away, ignoring the sudden heat crawling up your neck.

His laugh was soft, almost teasing. But the way he was looking at you? Like you were the only thing worth seeing? That was dangerous.

“C’mon. Seriously.”

You groaned, rolling your eyes, because he was so annoyingly persistent. “It doesn’t matter anymore.”

“Doesn’t it?” Bangchan tilted his head, lips curving in that cocky little smirk. “I doubt that.”

“Well, I don’t care,” you shot back, folding your arms in defiance.

Bangchan pushed himself off the floor, moving to sit on the edge of the bed—close, but not too close. Still, he was big. Broad. Built like a problem. And despite the space between you, he somehow took up all of it.

Worse? He smelled stupidly good.

“What do you want?” you asked, bracing yourself for the answer—because Bangchan was stupidly honest, and you weren’t sure you were ready for whatever was about to come out of his mouth.

But he didn’t say a word. Just kept looking at you, pupils blown wide, gaze slow as it dragged over your face like he was trying to memorize every detail.

Then, finally— “Why’d you come that night?”

You swallowed. “I went because… I wanted to talk. And… I wanted things to be okay between us.”

For a second, he just stared at you like you’d punched the air out of his lungs. Because you had gone after him. To fix things. To close the distance.

“You wanted to?” you barely nodded before he let out a breathy laugh, shaking his head. “Well, we’re two idiots, then.” his lips curled slightly, his whole energy shifting. “Because that’s all I want.”

Your eyes locked, and something about the way he was looking at you made your chest tighten. He had this insane ability to make you feel completely seen, like he could pick apart every thought in your head just by watching you.

“Why?”

Bangchan was never one to hold back, never afraid to be himself—especially when it came to being honest about what he wanted. And right now, he was this close to just laying it all out. Because the truth? He was ridiculously into you. More and more, every damn day.

“You’re stubborn, and I’m an idiot,” he muttered, lips pressing into a thin line before he let out a short laugh. The kind that made you laugh, too, before you even realized it. And honestly it pissed you off a little how easily he could do that—swing you from one extreme to another like it was nothing.

“Look,” he sighed. “I’m just gonna be straight with you, like I always am. I’m not playing games. I didn’t mean it when I said we were nothing.”

“But we are,” you mumbled, even though the words tasted like a lie. You weren’t anything. No labels, no relationship. Just a mess of late nights and tangled sheets—until things got way too complicated.

“I don’t want us to be nothing,” he said, shrugging, like he was just casually throwing his cards on the table. “Because ever since that first time, I haven’t wanted anyone else.”

Your breath caught, and suddenly, the bed felt too small, the room too warm. What the hell? You hadn’t expected this conversation to go there.

Bangchan? Not with anyone else? That was news. The guy was basically campus royalty when it came to hookups. Half the girls in your year had probably been in his dorm at some point.

And now he was sitting here, telling you this?

But now he was standing there, saying it out loud—no one else. Just you. And it sent your stomach into a tailspin.

“I shouldn’t have given you shit for it,” you muttered, nodding like that would somehow make the awkwardness go away. “I mean, since we’re not… you know.”

Bangchan lifted an eyebrow, clearly amused by how flustered you were.

“Oh, I know,” he said. “But you don’t get it. I don’t want anyone else.”

Your pulse spiked. Too fast. Too loud. What the hell was he trying to say?

“No, you’re just—” you let out a breathy, nervous laugh, stepping back like that would help. “You don’t know what you’re talking about.”

Bangchan didn’t let you go far. His hand caught yours, warm and steady, fingers wrapping around your wrist before he pulled you closer—right between his legs.

And then his hands were on your waist, fitting there like they belonged.

Your breath hitched.

His voice, suddenly lower, smoother, like silk wrapped in heat. “I know exactly what I want.”

Your eyes met his, and damn it, he was beautiful. That kind of beauty that wasn’t just about sharp jawlines and perfect features—it was something deeper, something that burned. The way his eyes locked onto you, glowing under the dim light. The way his expression was serious, but there was still softness lingering beneath it.

You knew what you wanted too. You just weren’t ready to admit it.

Your hands moved before your mind could catch up, tracing the curve of his brow, the sharp edge of his cheekbone—slow, like you were trying to memorize him by touch. Then, without thinking, you cupped his face, thumbs brushing over his skin.

Bangchan didn’t pull away. Didn’t even flinch. He just leaned into your touch, like this was normal, like you did this all the time. But you didn’t. Not like this.

Then he kissed the back of your hand, soft and slow, and damn it, you smiled.

“Say what you want,” he murmured.

“I…”

“I don’t care if I’m your dirty little secret,” he cut in, voice rough, low, burning at the edges. “I don’t care about any of it. As long as you’re mine, I’ll take whatever you’re willing to give.”

Something shifted inside you—hot, sharp, irreversible. Like a match hitting gasoline.

Bangchan tilted his head, pushing a strand of hair from your face. “What are you so afraid of?” his lips curled into a half-smirk. “You hate me that much?”

You let out a breath, shaking your head. “I don’t hate you.” your fingers tightened against his jaw. “Not even close.”

Bangchan pulled you in, arms locking tight around your waist, pressing you so close you could feel every breath he took against your skin. A shiver shot down your spine, anticipation curling in your stomach. You were teetering on the edge, seconds away from giving in—giving him everything. And if he was willing to take whatever you had to offer… What was stopping you?

With one swift move, his hands traced up the back of your thighs, fingers pressing into the sensitive skin behind your knees, guiding you onto the bed and onto his lap. The air between you shifted, crackling, something unspoken but heavy settling in the space only you two could understand.

It was automatic—this need, this burn. Like gravity, like the sky being blue, like the way your chemistry was always one spark away from setting the whole place on fire.

You tangled your fingers in his hair, yanking back just enough to force his eyes on you. And God, he looked wrecked—vulnerable in a way that made your stomach flip, pupils blown wide like he’d already lost the battle.

That’s when you kissed him.

It wasn’t soft. It wasn’t sweet. It was desperate—a clash of want, frustration, and every second of tension that had built between you. Like a wave crashing against the shore, wild and uncontrollable. You rocked against him, fingers tightening in his hair, barely biting back a moan when his hands gripped your ass, lifting you further into him.

Your skirt had already ridden up, but Bangchan wasn’t complaining.

He knew exactly what he was doing—kissing, nipping at your skin, hitting every spot that made you gasp. But it wasn’t enough. You needed more. More contact, more of him.

Your fingers found the hem of his shirt, tugging it up with shaky hands. Bangchan barely hesitated, lifting his arms, muscles flexing as he pulled the fabric over his head. The low, guttural sound that left his lips sent a shiver through you—deep, raw, almost primal. And God, he looked unreal.

“You want me to stop?” he murmured against your lips, voice thick with restraint.

You shook your head immediately, body betraying you with the way it trembled against him.

“I can stop,” he teased, but this time, the possibility made your stomach flip. Your eyes snapped to his, filled with something dangerously close to panic.

Stepping back, just for a second, you took him in. And no matter how many times you’d seen him like this, you never quite got used to it. All of him. Broad, sculpted shoulders, solid arms, every inch of him screaming strength. And all of that was yours.

Bangchan smirked, eyes narrowing with smug satisfaction. “You look like you want something.”

You huffed a laugh, shoving him back. “Shut up.”

But before you could move away, his hands gripped your waist, pulling you down with him. You landed against his chest with a startled yelp, his warmth pressing into you.

Then he kissed you—slow and deliberate, like he was savoring every second, every breath, as if the night stretched endless before you, mapping every inch of your lips with his own. Your laughter faded, swallowed by him.

Pinned against him, you could feel the effect you had on him, the heat of him beneath dark denim. And if there was one thing you knew, it was how to push him over the edge.

So you kissed him harder, rolling your hips against his.

His hands flew to your ass, squeezing before delivering a sharp slap that had you moaning into his mouth. That was just how it was with you two—obscene, messy, utterly shameless. And nothing turned you on more.

Your fingers found the zipper of his jeans, finally breaking away from his lips to look down at him. Bangchan pushed up on his elbows, watching you through half-lidded eyes, his breath ragged as he fought to stay still. His fingers twitched, desperate to put an end to the torturous wait. He was so hard it was unbearable—just seeing you like this had him on the edge.

He didn’t hesitate to help, making quick work of what little fabric still separated you. And fuck, you were drenched. Just the sight of him like this—wrecked for you—had your whole body tightening in anticipation.

There were so many ways this could go, and you wanted them all. One night would never be enough.

Your hand wrapped around him, firm, deliberate. A shaky curse tumbled from his lips, his head tipping back as he melted into your touch. He was barely holding it together when you lifted your hips, and for a second, he thought you were going to sink down onto him. Instead, you slid against him, rolling your hips so he could feel everything—dragging over your entrance, teasing up to your clit before sliding back down.

“Holy shit,” Bangchan groaned, voice strangled.

His hands twitched, reaching for you, aching to do something. But before he could, you leaned in, pinning his wrists down against the mattress.

He was at your mercy now. Completely helpless. And he fucking loved it.

Meanwhile, your hips kept moving, sliding over him, teasing but never giving in. The sheer size of him, the way he dragged against your clit with every slick roll of your hips—it was maddening. You lost all sense of rhythm, chasing pleasure in short, frantic motions, needing more, always more.

Bangchan was wrecked beneath you. His breath came in ragged bursts, his chest rising and falling as he groaned through clenched teeth, letting you take what you wanted. And the sight of him like this completely undone because of you? It was enough to make your head spin.

Your wetness mixed with his pre-cum, making a mess between you, the heat of it dizzying. Another deep grunt tore from his throat, and fuck—his orgasm was creeping up way too fast. He wasn’t about to let that happen. Not yet.

Your grip on his wrists loosened, your body trembling above him, so damn close—

“Want me to fuck you?” the words were a rasp, low and filthy against your skin.

And God, hearing him say it like that, made you feel absolutely ruined.

You were right there, wavering on the edge, but then—Bangchan’s hands gripped your waist, flipping you with ease. Your fingers dug into his shoulders as he pulled away, standing at the edge of the bed.

For a second, frustration flared hot in your chest—he’d just ripped away a mind-numbing orgasm—but the way he looked at you, eyes dark and full of promise, made it clear.

He wasn’t done. Not even close.

With impressive speed, Bangchan yanked your panties down, leaving you in nothing but that tiny skirt. You reached for your blouse, tearing it off without a second thought. Meanwhile, he fished a condom from his pocket, standing at the foot of the bed like he owned the place.

You bit your lip, taking in the sight of him—so big, so stupidly gorgeous.

Bangchan climbed onto the bed, his strong hands wrapping around your thighs, keeping them pressed together. His voice was low, commanding. "Spread your legs."

Your breath hitched, but you obeyed, parting them slowly. The skirt inched higher, higher, until it was bunched up around your waist.

He muttered something under his breath, gaze locked on how wet you were—for him. Almost dripping. You bit your lip, the weight of the moment thick in the air. "Please..."

Bangchan leaned in, kissing your stomach, then up to your chest. One arm braced against the bed, the other gripping himself as he brushed his cock against your cunt. The slow drag, the teasing, was cruel, and he knew it. He was watching you unravel—your body torn between frustration and aching need.

You were this close to grabbing him, to taking what you needed, but before you could, he caught your wrists in one hand, pinning them down.

"I'll let you..." his voice was a husky whisper, dark and full of promise. He kept that agonizing friction going, dragging against you, just enough to drive you insane. "But you have to tell me."

You were burning up, mind hazy, barely able to process his words. "Bangchan," you tried for something firm, but the second the tip of his cock rubbed against your clit—just the right mix of pleasure and frustration—a strangled moan slipped out instead.

"Tell me what you want, and it's yours," he murmured against your lips, smug as ever.

Your gaze met his, dark and needy. He picked up the pace, teasing you mercilessly—only to stop again. You let out a desperate whimper. This was torture.

"Just say it, love."

Your fingers dug into his shoulders, frustration bubbling over. "Your ego is too big."

Bangchan chuckled against your skin, stealing a quick kiss. "You know what else is big?"

You hooked a leg around his waist, pulling him in close. His breath caught, and for a second, he just looked at you—lips parted, eyes searching yours, ready to dive in.

"Guess you'll have to show me."

And Bangchan never turned down a challenge.

The moment he let you go, he was all action—rolling on the condom with practiced ease before yanking you flush against him. "Gonna fuck you so good you'll take it all back."

Then he slammed into you, deep, all at once, knocking the breath from your lungs. Stars burst behind your eyelids. Fuck, you’d never get used to the stretch. And neither would he, not with how tight you clenched around him, inch by inch.

Bangchan started slow, deliberate, watching every little reaction like he was committing it to memory.

"More," you gasped, nails dragging down his back.

And who was he to deny you?

A low, guttural curse slipped from his lips as he gripped the back of your leg, struggling to keep himself in check. But even he was failing. That dark, insatiable hunger inside him wanted to ruin you, break you apart piece by piece, and devour whatever was left.

"Yeah..." his hand found the back of your neck, and in one brutal motion, he buried himself to the hilt. Your eyes rolled back as a cry of pure pleasure ripped from your throat. "Fuck."

He did it again. And again. Testing you. Seeing just how much you could take. And then restraint snapped—his rhythm shifted from slow, deliberate thrusts to deep, relentless strokes that had you gasping, moaning, melting beneath him.

Your lungs fought for air, your body wrecked by the force of him. A tangled mess of curses and broken sounds spilled from your lips.

Bangchan leaned down, catching your mouth in a searing kiss, fucking you through every ragged breath. The filthy, desperate moans leaving his lips had you clinging to him, desperate to consume every last one.

"Bangchan—my God!" your fingers dug into his back like an anchor, but you were weightless, floating, dissolving into nothing.

You tried to pull him closer, but he straightened, still gripping your throat, keeping you right where he wanted.

"Say it." his thrusts were brutal, hitting so deep you thought you’d break apart. Faster. Harder. You cried out, a mess of pleasure and desperation, dizzy on the edge of something devastating."Tell me— you want me? Wanna cum on my cock?"

Your vision blurred, the sheer intensity forcing a tear to the corner of your eye. It was too much, but not enough, never enough.

"I want you," you choked out, voice ragged, shaking. "Fuck—" you barely finished the sentence before your body gave in, collapsing into pure, obliterating pleasure.

Bangchan caught your bottom lip between his teeth, sucking on it before murmuring against your mouth, “Good girl.”

Then his hand slipped between your bodies, finding your clit as he thrust into you, his fingers moving in tandem with his strokes. And that was it. The tipping point. Your back arched, but he pressed a firm hand to your stomach, pinning you down as pleasure overtook you. The last few thrusts sent you spiraling, your body clenching tight around him as you came hard, waves crashing over you.

Bangchan cursed under his breath, his grip tightening as his own release hit him like a freight train. "Fuck, fuck, fuck—" his whole body tensed, abs flexing as he emptied himself, barely managing to keep from collapsing on top of you.

Your chest rose and fell in sync with his, both of you wrecked, tangled, completely undone. He was so close, his forehead pressing against yours, damp hair sticking to his skin. And just like that, you kissed him—slow, deep, something unspoken passing between you. A shift.

Something had changed, and you both felt it.

"We need to stop doing this," you muttered against his lips.

Bangchan pulled back slightly, his brows knitting together. "What...?"

"Having sex in strangers’ rooms," you teased, the corner of your mouth quirking up. "Bad habit."

Relief flickered across his face before it was replaced by something far more dangerous. "Then let’s go to mine," he said smoothly, his voice thick with intent. "I’m not done with you."

You just laughed, shaking your head as you reached for your clothes. No argument, no teasing comeback—just that breathless, satisfied chuckle that told him you were just as wrecked as he was. And God, he admired you. The way you moved, the way you carried herself, as if what just happened was the most natural thing in the world. Like you hadn’t just left him completely undone.

He leaned back against the bed, watching as you slipped your blouse on, covering up inch by inch what he had just memorized with his hands, his lips, his tongue. A damn shame.

“I could go like this all night,” he murmured, voice thick with lust. His eyes dragged over you, slow and deliberate. “I’d never get tired of you.”

You paused for half a second, then, with a smirk, you glanced at him over your shoulder.

“Sweet talk won’t get you another round.”

He grinned, unbothered. “Who said I was asking?”

"Alright, lover boy," you sighed, straightening your skirt. "Call Changbin so we can get out of here before we end up adding ‘breaking and entering’ to our list of bad decisions."

But Bangchan just huffed out a laugh, reaching into his back pocket. You frowned, watching as he pulled out something small, something metallic—

And then he dangled a tiny key in front of your face.

Your breath caught. "You absolute—"

"Had the key the whole time?" he finished for you, grinning like the unapologetic menace he was.

You just stared at him, utterly gagged. "Are you telling me we could’ve left at any time—and you let me believe we were locked in here?!"

Bangchan had the audacity to laugh, and before you could get a single word of protest out, he grabbed your wrist, yanking you against him and crashing his lips onto yours. You let him. You melted into it, kissed him back like you weren’t even a little mad.

When he finally pulled away, his breath ghosted over your lips as he murmured, "I’m sorry, baby." But he was still laughing. Not sorry at all.

"No, you’re not," you shot back, trying—and failing—to sound pissed.

"You’re right," he admitted without shame, pressing another kiss to your mouth, slower this time, smug and indulgent. "But, in my defense… I knew you wanted me just as bad as I wanted you."

You narrowed your eyes, heat licking at your spine because—damn it—he wasn’t wrong.

Cocky bastard.

Still, you snatched the key from his fingers and shoved him toward the door. "Move before I leave your ass locked in here and tell everyone you cried for help."

Bangchan just smirked, twisting the doorknob with infuriating ease. "Joke’s on you—I’d make it sound sexy."

Bangchan slipped out first, leaving you alone in the dimly lit bedroom, the air still thick with everything that just happened. You took a breath, running a hand through your hair and letting out a low, incredulous laugh. Insane. That was the only word for it. Completely, absolutely, batshit insane.

You took your time freshening up before heading downstairs, blending back into the party like nothing happened—like your whole world hadn’t just been flipped on its head by a cocky bastard with unfairly good hands.

You found the drinks and poured yourself a beer, the cold liquid grounding you, when Hyunjin appeared at your side, eyeing you suspiciously.

“Mingyu was looking for you,” he said, tilting his head. “For a while. Then he gave up and left.”

You took a slow sip of your beer, carefully masking any reaction. “Huh. Tragic.”

Hyunjin squinted. “Okay, where the hell have you been?”

You shot him an easy smirk. “In the bathroom, Hyunjin. I have bodily functions like every other human being.”

His eyes narrowed further. “For that long?”

“Maybe I got lost,” you said with a shrug, taking another sip. “Or maybe I was reevaluating all my life choices.”

Hyunjin was still staring at you, unconvinced. “You were with someone.”

You huffed. “Stop being nosy and dance with me.”

Before he could pry any further, you grabbed his wrist and pulled him onto the dance floor. The bass thumped through your veins as you moved to the beat, thankful for the temporary distraction. But Hyunjin was sharp—too sharp. His gaze flickered to something over your shoulder, and then his lips parted in realization.

You didn’t have to turn around to know. You felt it.

Bangchan was across the room, talking to Changbin and Seungmin like he hadn’t just been inside you not too long ago. But the way he looked at you—steady, knowing, like he was still feeling every second of what just happened—Hyunjin caught it immediately.

“No way.” he gaped at you. “You didn’t.”

You met his stare, unfazed. “I did.”

Hyunjin groaned, rubbing his face like this was his personal crisis. “You two are so fucking messy.”

You just laughed, finishing the rest of your beer. “And yet, I’m having a great time.”

A while later, when you finally decided you’d had enough social interaction for one night, you nudged Hyunjin. “I’m heading out.”

He nodded. “Cool, I’ll get you an Uber. I’ll go with Lix.”

Before you could even reach for your phone, a familiar voice interrupted. “No need.”

Bangchan. Standing way too close, hands in his pockets, looking like the devil who got exactly what he wanted.

“I’m driving back,” he said smoothly. “I’ll take you.”

Your mouth opened, but Hyunjin’s eyebrow was already rising, looking between the two of you like he had front-row seats to a drama he needed to see play out.

“I can go alone,” you said, keeping your voice level.

Bangchan smirked. “I insist.”

You sighed, side-eyeing Hyunjin. His expression was nothing short of feral with interest.

“Fine,” you muttered. “But no funny business.”

Bangchan only chuckled, walking off first. You lingered behind for a few beats before following, slipping out quietly, only Hyunjin watching your exit with a smug, entertained look.

He was never letting you live this down.

The night air was sharp against your flushed skin, a cruel contrast to the heat still licking at your nerves. Bangchan stood by his car—a sleek, black beauty that suited him too well. Under the dim glow of the streetlights, he looked almost unreal, all sharp lines and confidence as he pulled the passenger door open, his gaze never leaving yours.

You hesitated. Not because you didn’t want to get in. But because you knew—the second you did, there’d be no turning back from whatever the hell this was becoming.

Bangchan saw right through you. He always did.

His voice dipped low, rough with amusement. “Get in, baby. Or I’ll put you in myself.”

Your stomach flipped. You rolled your eyes, masking the way his words sent a pulse of heat straight through you. “Such a gentleman,” you muttered, but your lips twitched, betraying you.

Still, you slid into the seat, the cool leather kissing your bare thighs. He followed, reaching over—closer, closer—until his fingers brushed the seatbelt, tugging it across you.

And suddenly, the air inside the car felt thick. Heavy.

His breath ghosted over your collarbone, close enough that his lips could’ve skimmed your skin if you so much as moved. You could feel the warmth of him, the way his fingers lingered just a second too long before clicking the buckle into place.

Your throat went dry.

You cleared it quickly, forcing out something—anything—to cut through the tension threatening to swallow you whole. “I’m exhausted.”

He pulled back just enough to smirk. “Sure you are.”

The car hummed to life, but your brain? It was shot to hell.

Because now you had to sit there and endure the sight of him driving one-handed, muscles flexing, veins peeking through his skin like temptation itself. It was obscene, the way he handled the car—like he did everything else. With control. With ease.

You swallowed, shifting in your seat, pressing your legs together.

Bangchan noticed. Of course, he did.

His smirk deepened, eyes flicking toward you before drifting back to the road. “Something wrong?”

“Nothing,” you lied, voice far too even to be convincing.

He made a sound, low in his throat, clearly unconvinced. Then, like he lived to ruin you, his hand dropped to your thigh—warm, steady, fingers pressing just enough to make you feel it.

Your breath hitched. “Bangchan.”

He leaned in slightly, just enough to let you catch the edge of his scent—clean, intoxicating, laced with something that made your pulse stutter. His thumb stroked slow, lazy circles against your skin.

“You’re always ready for me, aren’t you?” his voice was nothing but a taunt, silk-wrapped sin.

A shiver licked down your spine. The worst part? He was right. And he fucking knew it.

His fingers crept higher, brushing against the inside of your thigh, deliberate and slow. “I could fuck you right here,” he murmured, his breath feather-light against your ear. “No one would see. No one would know.”

Your body responded before your brain did, every nerve alight, screaming at you to let this happen.

But you had to be smart. For once.

With every ounce of restraint you had left, you grabbed his wrist, halting his movements before they ruined you completely. “I have to go.”

For a moment, he just looked at you, eyes dark, unreadable. Then, his lips curled—not in disappointment, but something far more dangerous.

“Fine.”

But before you could breathe, before you could move, he reached for you, tilting your chin up with maddening ease. His gaze locked onto yours, deep and knowing, before his tongue swept over your bottom lip, slow, deliberate, claiming.

Then he kissed you. Deep. Slow. Devastating.

By the time he pulled away, you were wrecked. Breathless.

“Goodnight, baby,” he murmured, unlocking the door like he hadn’t just unraveled you in a single move.

You barely remembered getting out, legs weaker than they had any right to be. As you walked back to your dorm, dazed and burning, one thought rattled through your skull like a warning you’d never heed:

He’s gonna be the death of me.

♡ taglist ― @kenia4@chrizrizz @meerabmalik @gnabnahcsworld @gncbnahc @jinniejjam @skzworldx @itsacatastrophe-xo @soonie1010 @4ng3l-ch1ld @justwonder113 @tsunderelino @eastjonowhere @lyracarvahall @akindaflora @victoriaaf @ebnabi @wickedbutlovely @bitchysunflower11 @grandpasb0ng

[tan1shere]

Use Me

Billie Eilish x female reader !

A/n: thanks @iluvapplesxh for inspiring this I hope you ALL enjoy

Summary: billies stressed, she needs to let off steam and you're the perfect stress reliever.

Warnings: smut, mirror sex, missionary - i think that's about it !!

Masterlist

Night time was the time to wind down, whether it was a simple or stressful day you adored getting into bed and just scrolling on your phone. When the door opens, your head looks up at Billie. "Hi baby." She grabs her shirt from the back, with one hand and pulls it over her head. You were a little taken aback, ofcourse staring at her tits.

Her hair becoming messy, making you stare. "Rough day?" You say softly. "Yup." She then gets on the bed, getting ontop of you. How could you stop it she looked so good. Her lips crash onto yours with such passion. "Wanna fuck you." She breathes against them. You sigh out. "Please do." Your voice was laced with a whiney need.

And without further warning she was already entering you. Your back arching instinctively at her slow strokes. Her forearms on either side of your upper body, leaning down to kiss your lips. Everything about this was passionate. Your eyes dart up to the mirror that was above you on the ceiling. Getting a perfect view of her tattoo. You moan as she bottoms out completely. "F-fuck!" You breathe, both of you feeling your pussy suck in more of her. Her mind eases, letting out a content sigh.

Face to face with one another, you close your eyes. Feeling embarrassed at her gaze. But her hand makes effort in grabbing your jaw. "Look at me baby, eye contact. Come on." Your heartbeat speeds up, along with her powerful thrusts. Head spinning just as fast. "Bills.." you breathe, looking into those blue eyes. That are seemingly darkening the more she fucks you. You were like her drug, one of the best feelings in the world. Whether that be sexual or not you were her everything. She adored this position so so much. "There you go sweet girl." She smirks a little as your cheeks grow red.

"You're just so cute." That caused you wriggle just a bit, feeling flustered again. Her head dips down going into your neck, kissing. Sucking on that spot that had you moaning into her ear for. Moaning so loudly. It was her favorite sound in the whole world. She's even put it quietly in the back of one of her songs before.

Enough for her ears to pick up on, but silent for listeners, fans. Unless they knew or really listened in on the background. Her thrusts become more forceful. Her back tenses as she keeps her weight up above you. Arm muscles on display. God she looked so good.

Your eyes wander back at the ceiling, her whole silhouette toned, her back muscles. The tattoo. Your hands move over her back watching it in the mirror. Your heart pumps still, just like the fake dick was inside you. "You feel so good baby." She knew exactly how to get you. What words to say, what touches. And this was only bringing you closer. "F-faster please.." Knowing she was holding back just a little. You knew what she was capable of.

"So greedy, hm?" You don't reply, not thinking you needed to, but when she grabs your face again. With more force, you regret not doing so. "You gunna answer me baby girl? Or is my dick distracting you, too deep?" If anything she wasn't deep enough. But you get distracted again. Her fucking back. "Focus mama, what're you so fixated on.."

Her head moves, causing her movements to still in the process. An annoyed whine escaping you. Her eyes look up and at the mirror. "Ah. Now I get it." Her face shifts back right infront of your own. Tilted and taunting. You wriggle yet again.

"You're staring at my tat huh? Cute, cute. Cute." You clench hungrily around her getting closer and closer. She feels it, she feels it all. "Keep eye contact yeah?" You nod, feeling her basically doing a push up above you, moving her lower half faster than she had been, you moan continuously. Trying insanely hard to keep that eye contact. It was approaching quicker. "Bills- Fuck!" You wanted to keep eye contact you really did, but it was so tricky.

Her relentless thrusts making your mind go crazy. Not to mention you so desperately wanted to look at her tattoo again. That beautiful long tatto, that covered her spine.

You loved it, it was so hot. And your eyes did for a split second. Noticing just how toned she was in the new position she was in. All the gym visits paying off, and paying off well. She looked incredible, and the fact she was keeping herself up with no struggle. Was attractive in itself. "Im-"

You begin but moan as she hits the right spot inside you. "Fuckfuckfuck." Her eyes never leave your face, wanting to watch you unfold all over her. "That's a good girl. Keep looking at me, know you can."

And before you know it you cum, all over the sheets and her cock. Her movements not stilling, helping you get to the delicious high and come down from it. She slows down noticing you're getting overstimulated.

Pulling out gently, trying so hard to not hurt you. "Thanks angel. Just what I needed today." You smile tiredly. "You're welcome Bills, anything to help." She caresses your face. Admiring you. "You're beautiful. Let's get some rest yeah?" You nod in reply, cuddling up to one another. Warm, and in such comfort.

[whatifitis]

♡ In Between - FC 43 ♡

Summary: You and Franco has a nice night in, when you start to think about your guys relationship and wonder if it's time you tell him that you really like him.

WC: 2320

CW: overuse of song references, nothing really, it's quite fluffy, maybe some negative thoughts the reader has about themselves?

It’s a Saturday night, one of the least chaotic ones now that your best friend is a driver in F1. Franco was called up to fill Logan's seat for the rest of the season which is beyond exciting and you couldn’t be more proud. The only downside is that his schedule is so much more packed now that he’s getting acknowledgement from so many teams and people. All this new media coverage feels so insane. And something that doesn’t help is the fact that you’ve slowly been falling for Franco.

The two of you have been friends for a while. But in recent months, you’ve started to see him in a different light. You’re sure it’s just a crush but it’s been well over 2 months that you’ve felt this way. Some say that crushes only last about 2 months, once you’re past that mark, you’re actually in love with the person. You hoped this crush would go away, afraid to ruin what you have with Franco. Your relationship with him is the best that’s ever happened to you. You never want to lose him. But alas, the crush did not go away. So now you’re here.

It’s a bit late into the evening now. Franco asked you out for lunch earlier and now the two of you are lying on his bed, watching American Pie. The two of you were lying on the bed, side by side. Franco was lying with his back against the bed's headboard while you lied next to him on your side. The safest place you’ve ever known, next to him.

The two of you were halfway through the movie when he asked you a question that you didn’t quite catch the first time, so you angle your head up to look at him. As soon as you locked eyes with him, Franco couldn’t help but laugh. When you moved your head to look at him, your glasses had skewed on your face.

His laugh always was so contagious, it always got you laughing too. When you two had calmed your laughing fits, Franco took his hand and adjusted your glasses into the right position, before leaning forward and gently kissing your forehead.

“You’re beautiful… and funny… And smart. Like nothing I’ve ever seen.” You turned to bury your face in your hands, trying to hide your blushing face. You love it when he talks, not just about you. About anything really, he’s your favorite yapper and you wish you could listen to him all day. Your favorite sound ever.

“Hey, let me see that beautiful face again.” Franco says, grabbing your hand and moving it from your face. “Hi” he says when he can see you again. “Hi” you reply, smiling so hard. It was so hard to believe this was real, your guy's friendship. It was the type of relationship you’d always dreamed of, that sort of naive and innocent relationship that was filled with laughter and joy and… love? Was it too soon to use that word? Maybe considering you were just friends… Just. Friends.

“So,” Franco started, pulling you out of your thoughts, “What’s the dream?” “The dream?” you look at him, confusion written all over your face. “Yeah, the dream. Your dream. What you’re working towards.”

You laid there for a beat, thinking about it. What was your dream? All this time, you’ve just been focusing on surviving, not so much on the living.

“Um, I’m not sure. I’ve never really thought about it. I guess I want to finish my masters degree in uni. Then after that, just… live, I guess.” you look up at him with a smile. “That’s it? You don’t have any other goals or anything?” - his eyebrows furrow, showing you a confused expression. You shake your head no. “You’re kidding.” - Franco snorts in disbelief. “Well, what are yours? Your plans, goals.” You ask as you sit up against the headboard of the bed. “Em, well, I guess F1 was always a big goal, and now I have it.” he sits there for a second, thinking, twisting his lips as he does, “I’ve also always wanted to have a nice house for my family.” “What does this house look like?” you ask. He takes a moment to think, trying to come up with an honest answer for you. “I never really thought about that to be honest. I just want something nice with enough space for my family. I think a pool in the back would be nice. A big backyard so we could have barbecues as well.”

You’re smiling at him, admiring the person in front of you. You could find the whole meaning of life in those eyes. You’re glad he gets you, and your dark sense of humor. And when you let him in on all your bad decisions, he made them feel less terrible the second that he’d listen.

Don’t stop talking to me. Maybe stay here forever, with me.

“I think that sounds lovely.” you say. “Thank you.” he replies, blushing at your words, “What about your house? Your dream house. Surely you have a dream house.”

You sit up straight, so ready to answer this question. You won’t lie when you say you’ve always wanted to be asked about this. “I do. Um, well it would have a green kitchen. I saw a picture of one online a while ago and just became obsessed with the idea. And the bathrooms would be pink and red, I just think that would look sick. Oh! I also really want a blue hallway.” Franco gives you a confused look, “A blue hallway? For what?” “There’s this band that I love and in one of their music videos, the band painted a wall in the house blue.” “Ah. Which song is the one for the blue wall?” “It’s called True Blue. It’s a song about the person you love and who loves you. This person knows you so well, maybe even more than you know yourself.” “Interesting” he nods his head as he mentally writes down the name of that song so he can listen to it later. He turns his body more towards you, asking “Do you have a true blue?” “I think I’m slowly discovering mine” - you confess. “What about you? Got a true blue yourself?” He looks at you before looking down at his hands and failing to suppress a smile. “Yeah, I do.” “Well, go on. Tell me about them.” you insist. “She’s really cool.”

She? Was he talking to someone else? No, don’t be like that. Maybe it’s just a friend or something? Right?

“She is also really smart.”, he continues, “She loves reading and not only listening to music but also creating it.” Is he talking about me? I do that. “And she’s really good at that. She’s also the hardest working person I know. Like I mean she’s really smart, like Einstein smart.”

You couldn’t help but laugh at this. He’s definitely exaggerating but you have to admit, you’re pretty fucking smart.

“Oh, is she now? She must be one hell of a catch” “Oh trust me. She is and I’m very lucky to have her. She’s also the most beautiful person I’ve ever known. Not just on the outside, that’s an added bonus. But she’s just incredible. And she laughs at all my jokes. And when I save the dirty ones for her, her nose crinkles. It’s really cute actually. Her voice as well, oh my god. The best sound ever. Like when there’s something she’s really interested in or really passionate about, she could talk for hours. That’s one of my favorite things about her. That and her laugh, I wish I could bottle up the sound of her laugh and keep it with me, so I can listen to it whenever I want. Don’t even get me started on how she is with my family. They all get along so amazingly, it’s so much greater than anything I could ever imagine. I think one of the selling points was my family loving her as much as I do. This girl also will drop everything for those she loves. It doesn’t matter if she has work or school or anything, she will drop it just to make sure you’re okay. And she will beat anyone’s ass if they hurt you. I think I’m falling for her. I don’t wanna look at anything else now that I’ve seen her. Now it’s like there’s daylight. Whenever I’m with her, everything feels okay.” “Wow.” is all you can say in this moment. Was he really talking about you? Or are you wishfully thinking he is? “Yeah”, he blushes, “wow”

You take a moment to take all that information in. Maybe he wasn’t talking about you. You clearly see how amazing he is, other people are able to as well. Your mood kind of dampens from these thoughts. You really thought you two could be something. You guess you made it all up in your head, it’s just all one sided.

“What’s wrong?” Franco asks. “Hm? What?” you respond, startled from the sudden break of silence. “What’s wrong? You kind of spaced out.” “Oh, nothing. Was just thinking.” “About?” he responds, sitting up from the bed to lean a bit closer to you. “It’s really nothing. Let’s keep watching the movie” you try to smile and lighten the mood again.

You move to raise the volume on the tv, but you feel Franco’s hand wrap around your wrist lightly. You turn back to look at Franco. He looks confused, and a bit scared?

“Wait, I need to talk to you.”

Oh shit

You return to your spot on the bed, not fully relaxing as his last sentence is kind of terrifying. “Yeah, of course. What’s up?” “I need to tell you something… about that girl.” “Oh”

Damn, alright. Keep bragging about how it’s not me, I guess.

“Well, I know she often thinks negatively about herself. Like she doesn’t deserve that type of stuff. Like love and happiness. She also has a hard time believing that people really do care about her. But I do, I love and care about her so much. And I know she’s afraid of letting people in, and she’s let me in a bit, but I want more with her.”

Ok, fuck me then. Wow, leave it to Franco to absolutely break my heart, unknowingly.

“So, what did you need from me?” “You dumb ass, it’s you! You’re the girl. You’re my true blue.” he lightly laughs.

What.

“What.” you stare at him blankly.

What the fuck? Is he for real right now? How though?

“I like you. I want more with you! You’re my true blue! I want you for worse or for better. I would wait for ever and ever.” - his tone is quiet as he confesses his feelings for you. You sit there silent for a moment before catching something. “Bitch, did you just quote Taylor Swift?!”

He looked to the side for a minute, as if he was thinking or trying to remember something while he pursed his lips. “Yeah?” he laughs, “I know you like her a lot so I listened to her a lot to try and learn some of her songs. They’re pretty good”

I’m going down without a fight, I don’t know how he does this. He makes me really nervous. What is he doing to me now?

“You listened to her… just for me?” you ask, still hesitant on whether he’s being serious or just messing with you. Cause you’re still falling for him and you can’t stop. This might be the thing that breaks you if it doesn’t end well.

“Yes. Staying up with you, despite the space between us. I’ve never felt so close to someone. You came out of the blue like a shooting star. You wait and wait for it to appear, and when it does, it illuminates its surroundings, just for a second. And that is the feeling that I want to feel forever. Everytime I get to see you, it’s like you illuminate every space you walk into.”

What if he’s my weakness?

“I- I don’t know what to say. All this time, I’ve been keeping on my mind on the running away. And for the first time, I’d consider to stay. I know I make the same mistakes a lot and I never learn. But I think I did one thing right.” you say, smiling as his starry eyes spark up this dark night.

He’s looking at you with so much admiration in his eyes.

“I got so damn close to packing it up, then you happened. I’ll never leave out the back door and I don’t plan on running away from the good things anymore.” - you continue.

The two of you just sat there in silence, staring at each other with smiles plastered on your faces. Franco is the first to break, moving closer to you, leaning close to grab the side of your face.

Breathe in, breathe through, breathe deep, breathe out

You’re close enough to feel each other breathe. Just one inch closer and… His lips are on yours, connecting gently. They’re warm and soft. You wrap your arms around his neck, pulling your bodies closer together. At the same time, Franco brings his other arm to wrap around your torso, grabbing the side of your waist so you don’t slip away. It’s like taking your first breath of air in years. You feel his lips on yours as butterflies erupt in your stomach.

After a few moments, you break the kiss, needing to actually take in some air. Franco’s hand is still on the side of your face, slowly he slides it down to connect your fingers with his.

“Can I be yours?” he asks, “Your forever true blue?” he asks. “Forever and always”

[seattlesellie]

don’t cross the line

pairing: ellie williams x reader

warnings: smut (mdni), cheating, angst, mutual masturbation, just morally wrong, mentions of alcohol

Parties in Jackson fucking suck.

It’s not like youve ever been at a different party, but still. You’ve read about them in the little magazines from the old days you found on patrols. Small blurbs about meaningless celebrities, a concept you barely even understood, drinking themselves to oblivion. Paparazzi pictures of young starlets in black limousines, rappers getting coked up in dark bathrooms. You never really got it. Parties in Jackson were like a parallel universe.

“They must have made that up” you told Dina, your best friend and trusty patrol partner. “Nope” she shrugged. “Heard that Paris Hilton girl was really like that.”

Paris hilton would have hated Jackson parties. A bunch of old people, and a handful of young ones, dancing around to the beat of an old country song, if you could even call that a beat.

You could have responded with a simple “No thanks” when Jesse had invited you to tonights party. You could have told him you were tired, busy, sick, he would have left you alone - But you didn’t, alas, this is how you found yourself here. Alone, in an old barn, listening to the batshit insane, drunk ramblings of an old fart named Seth.

“Ripped that fella’s throat with just one move” Seth mumbled, laughing stupidly at his own words.

“Go — got him real good n’dirty, I tell ya”

Whoever said “respect the elderly” clearly never met Seth. His breath reeked of whiskey and cigarettes that he traded for food and supplies, and my god, he was standing so close you could see the veins in his yellow tinted eyeballs. You really were too polite for your own good, you thought to yourself, because Ellie would have shoved him away already.

Ellie.

You felt like slapping yourself in the face. What the hell does she have to do with this? Why can’t you just let it fucking go already? It truly was desperate, and pathetic, and borderline immoral, the amount you spent thinking about that girl.

So what if she used to be your best friend. So what if she was the first girl who ever made you feel something, even if it was too late. She has a girlfriend, and she’s not thinking about you, she doesn’t care, maybe never has, probably never will. She left you for her, with that useless excuse of “Cat doesn’t like it when we hang out” followed by a pathetic “We can do it in secret, though.”, when she saw your eyes turn glossy and your breath hitch up. Fuck her, and fuck those memories. Fuck all the nights you spent together telling each other your deepest and darkest desires, and especially fuck that time you almost-

“Hey”

You'd recognize that voice anywhere.

A royal blue flannel button up shirt appeared at the corner of your eye.

“Mind if I steal her for a sec, Seth?”

She sounded raspy, laced with that velvety layer her voice had adorned whenever she had a sip or more of Whiskey. When you drank together for the first time, at the ripe age of sixteen, next to a big bonfire and the ever so familiar scent of pine lacing your sense of smell, you told her that she sounds different when she’s drunk. More mature, somehow. Less fidgety, slower, sultrier. She replayed that sentence over and over again in her head. “Sultry”, she whispered to herself. “I sound sultry.”

Seth cleared his throat, a deep cough escaping his lungs.

“Of course, pretty girl like her shouldn’t be around me for too long, might start acting all wild!” The old man threw his hands in the air, and disappeared somewhere in the scarce crowd.

Your heartbeat was faster than normal, but that’s not new. Not when she was around, anyways.

Ellie stood by your side, hands crossed over her chest. She had a glass of Rum in her hand, not Whiskey. Funny.

“You’re a Rum type of girl now?” you questioned, never meeting her gaze. If you bothered to look to your side, you would have noticed she was staring.

“Fame’s changed me, I guess” She responded, mixing the fluid in her glass.

One week ago, Ellie went on patrol. One week ago, Ellie killed more infected in one go than anyone else had in years. She was the town’s hero, the infected slayer. Cat even made her a badge. She wasn’t wearing it now.

“Cat or fame?” you quietly mumbled under your breath.

You weren’t spectacularly brave with your words, but one glass of presumably expired white wine made a simple girl go very far.

“Hah. Funny” she scoffed dryly, earning her Rum another pointless swirl.

“You’re the towns hero, I’m the towns comedian, we’re both pretty famous, i’d say.”

Ellie’s gaze was fixed on the wall. She squinted her eyebrows slightly, humming in response. You looked over at her, for just a second, noticing the dim light reflecting in her eyes. She was a sight to behold, the most beautiful girl you’ve ever seen. You wish she knew that. You wish you could be the one to tell her.

You inhaled deeply, and it came out so shaky that when you exhaled you were terrified she heard the tremor in your body.

“Thank’s for the save, by the way” you said quietly, apologetic. You even smiled politely, which was absolutely for nothing, because she wasn’t looking at you, avoiding your gaze like the plague.

It’s not like Ellie and you didn’t talk since that night she told you she couldn’t see you anymore. It’s been two whole years. You had to talk, you had to communicate somehow, even if it was through polite smiles and dry conversations during shared patrols. Hell, you even went to Cat’s birthday party you somehow were invited to. Dina was practically on her knees begging you to come with her, and who could say no to Dina when she looked at them with those puppy eyes that could tug at a monsters heartstrings?

“Yeah, no problem. That man’s a fucking dickhead” Ellie scoffed, leaned against the bar and crossed her legs.

“Where’s Cat?” you questioned. Are you sure you only had one glass of wine?

“She’s not here” Ellie responded dryly, seemingly annoyed at your question. She almost tsk’d when you asked. She didn’t look surprised by your rude antics, maybe you got like this more often than you thought. How about that time you told her you’re surprised Cat didn’t pack her a sandwich with a sticker on it’s wrapper during patrol?

“I can tell… why?” you inquired. Your own voice was deeper too, it almost matched hers.

“Didn’t wanna come” Ellie said, stuffing a hand inside her pocket. She was uncomfortable, clearly, and wanted, needed, to make you shut up. It’s not because your presence annoyed her, It’s because she knew she was wrong. She knew she fucked up when she ditched you, and if only you knew how it was eating her alive every day. She had to do it, because in her eyes, she would have done something much worse if she hadn’t.

Being around you when she wasn’t with Cat was hard enough, because she knew she could never have you, that you’d never want her. Not if you knew. You were too smart, and too good, to ever want to be with her. Cat was easy, she didn’t ask too many questions. She’d lay there for Ellie when Ellie told her to, and she would agree to stop a conversation when it got too personal. When Ellie cried at night, and woke up sweating, she didn’t ask why. She let it go, and Ellie knew you never would have. You’d fucking hate her if you knew. She could have saved the world — and she didn’t. He didn’t let her. The wounds she had were too deep, they were clawing and tugging at her skin from the inside. Ellie was a tortured soul, and you didn’t deserve that. That’s why she left, and maybe, that’s why she was here right now.

“That’s too bad” you mumbled quietly. You did your best to make it sound genuine, and you failed miserably.

Ellie scoffed.

“Yeah”

You shifted slightly, and walked over to stand right in front of her. You met her eyes for the first time. Those stupid, beautiful emerald eyes.

Ellie looked down, and looked up at you. She swallowed deeply.

“Anyways” you sighed. “Think I’m gonna go”

“Already?” she questioned, slamming her Rum filled glass on the bar counter.

“Yeah, I’m cold and it sucks in here, so” you said, and smiled politely. It really was freezing, and talking to her like this was painful enough.

“Let me walk you” she blurted.

What?

“Huh?” walk you where? the door? you knew where it was.

She tugged at the loose string on the bottom of her button up. It was ironed, where did Ellie find and iron? Did Maria do it for her? Town hero perks?

“Let me walk you home” she repeated, her voice carrying a touch of insistence. Once again, you found yourself captivated by her burning gaze, those eyes that seemed to hold secrets yet to be unveiled.

“I can walk home alone, Ellie” You huffed, ever the stubborn.

“No” she exclaimed.

“Maria said it’s been pretty dangerous”

“I can have my own back, you know, I’m not an idiot” You scoffed. You knew she didn’t think you were an idiot, why did she have to walk you home?

“I know that — Just wanna make sure you’re safe”

“Gosh, Ellie thank you! thank you!” You said in the most high pitched voice you could fathom. “The town’s hero is at it again, everybody!” You exclaimed, slightly raising your voice, earning both of you a few curious looks from the townspeople.

Ellie wasn’t embarrassed. She was just annoyed. And she wanted to slap you in the face for being so stubborn.

She grasped your arm with an unexpected forcefulness, pulling you along as she swiftly guided you outside. In the process, you accidentally bumped into a few people, hastily muttering a string of apologetic "sorry" and "excuse me" as you hurriedly tried to navigate through the crowd. You attempted to resist her firm grip, trying to free yourself with a burst of strength, but you found yourself overpowered by her determination.

Once she managed to pull you outside, she finally released her grip on your arm, allowing you a brief respite from her firm hold.

“You are not walking me anywhere, Williams” you scoffed. What made her think you needed her help?

“You’ve always been so fucking stubborn” she turned to face you. Her hands were on her hips. Her face wore the same expression she did when you went on your first patrol together, when you insisted on going left, even though she knew you had to go right.

“I’m walking now” you stepped away, and started walking. “And if you followed me — you wouldn’t be walking me home, you’d be stalking me” you exclaimed as you backed away.

Ellie quickly followed your pace, her boots stomping on the snow covered ground.

“You are”

Step

“So fucking annoying”

This was the longest conversation you’ve had with Ellie in two whole years. It felt like nothing’s changed, except for everything.

The following ten minutes were torturous. You were walking fast, Ellie right behind you. No words were exchanged between you, the silence enveloping the crisp air as you both walked in silence. Your attention turned inward, focusing on the sensation of the cold air filling your lungs with each breath, and the soft sound of Ellie's boots pressing against the creaking snow beneath her.

You finally arrived at your place. It’s grey exterior blanketed in a pristine layer of snow. Every inch of its structure was adorned with a delicate coat of white.

You turned around to face her.

Ellie’s skin appeared slightly flushed, with a rosy tinge highlighting her cheeks, and her nose bore a noticeable reddish hue, hinting at the crisp winter air. She didn’t say a word.

You took a deep breath. She looked cold.

“Want me to make you some tea?” you questioned. You didn’t mean to let her in, and she didn’t expect you to ask. She looked surprised, her eyebrows turned slightly upwards.

“M’fine” Ellie insisted, her voice resolute despite the chill in the air. She sought warmth by tucking her hands deep into the pockets of her dark green coat.

“Jesus, Ellie — Just come inside” you urged, the concern evident in your voice.

“If walking you was stalking wouldn’t coming in be breaking and entering?” she inquired, a sarcastic tone lacing her words.

“Just —“ you uttered, your voice trailing off as you reached for the doorknob, slowly opening the door.

“Come inside”

"Fine," Ellie relented, her resolve wavering as she decided to follow in your footsteps.

The house welcomed you with its cozy warmth, though slightly disorganized in its appearance. Yet, amidst the subtle chaos, it remained a comforting sanctuary, always your safe space. Being there brought a sense of solace, as if the troubles of the outside world faded away. And with Ellie's presence by your side, an inexplicable tingling sensation spread through your being.

You proceeded to heat up some water, carefully attending to the task of preparing tea, a familiar ritual.

Ellie never knew where to sit, or where to stand, so there she was, examining every single one of your movements. The air felt thick, like you could cut the tension with a switchblade.

"Your house looks different," she murmured in a low voice, leaning against the cream-colored wall.

“Bad different?” You questioned, taking out two mugs from the cupboard.

“No, just… more stuff” she murmured.

"Well," you uttered as you gently placed the teabag into the awaiting mug. “You haven’t been here in a while, so”

Ellie hummed in response, and bit her lower lip.

“You’ve kind of changed too.” you murmured.

“Tattoos looking bigger. And you look more tired. Plus, your shirt looks ironed, so maybe you even… showered? Woah.” you teased.

“Fuck, you really are funny huh?” she said, crossing her arms.

“Always were a sucker for my jokes” you responded with a sly smile.

She didn’t mean to say what she said next, because that was like opening a pandora’s box. Or, more like, the gates to hell.

“This is the longest conversation we’ve had in years” Ellie murmured. You handed her the green colored mug, your finger brushing her’s for a second. You both flinched.

“Mhm” you took a sip from your tea. It was still so hot, it burned your tongue.

“And who’s fault is that?” You questioned, raising your eyes to meet her burning gaze. It was incredibly impulsive.

Ellie rolled her eyes. She looked baffled.

“You still don’t get it, do you? She questioned.

“Get what? that your girlfriend doesn’t like me? trust me Ellie, I get that, crystal clear.” You smiled, as you slammed your mug on the counter.

“I’m not doing this right now” she declared, her tone firm and resolute.

Oh, did that sentence burn through you.

“I think you are” you stepped forward to face her. She looked terrified, like a lost puppy. Not so “town’s hero” now. Thank god she wasn’t wearing Cat’s badge, because she would have looked ridiculous.

“I’m not” she said quietly, looking at the floor beneath her.

You felt the ever so familiar lump forming in your throat. She owed you.

“Tell me what it is exactly that I don’t get” you spat. The pent up anger from all these years finally just fucking bursted. She left you. She left you for her, your best fucking friend.

“It’s just funny how she didn’t give a shit about Jesse, or Dina, or anybody! Just fucking me, right? I’m the fucking problem?” you blurted. Your voice was shaky, filled with rage. The tears in your eyes started forming. You didn’t even know how much you were holding it inside of you, it all overflowed, at 2AM, right in your kitchen. Right where she told you she couldn’t see you anymore.

Ellie was frozen, her mouth parted slightly. She was flushed, and it showed. It wasn’t the cold weather anymore, it was you. She didn’t expect this to happen so fast. She came inside for some fucking tea.

That’s when you shoved her. And she didn’t even fucking move.

“Don’t fucking do this to me” she begged. Her voice was desperate, and shaky, and what the fuck was she hiding?

You found yourselves standing uncomfortably close to each other, the proximity palpable. The warmth of her breath gently grazed your forehead, creating a tantalizing sensation that sent a shiver down your spine.

She took a deep breath.

“What I did was bad. But — fuck, Jesse and Dina never slept over, you know that?”

The room fell quiet.

“So?” you whispered. You couldn’t even look at her.

“Don’t do this” she begged. Her eyes were glossy. She looked as if she was about to cry, too. Her chest was pressed up against yours.

“I’m not doing anything” you mumbled quietly. Her body was so warm. You felt like you were about to have a heart attack, and Ellie felt like she already did.

“If I would have stayed… I would have done something… so much worse” she whispered. Her hands were trembling.

“What would you have done?” you whispered against her. Dangerously close now. You could feel her unsteady heartbeat.

“You know” she whispered back. You saw the vein on her neck, how beautifully spattered the freckles on her skin were, like a constellation.

“Please” you begged.

That’s all it took.

Almost.

"No," she whispered, her voice barely audible. The proximity between your lips was almost intimate, an agonizingly close distance.

“Please” you begged.

Her eyes were dark, breaths unsteady and fast, like she just ran a marathon. Her chest was rising up and down. She’s dreamt of this moment, for so fucking long. But she couldn’t. She couldn’t fuck more people up. She’s done more than enough.

“You don’t know what you fucking do to me” She whispered against your skin. Her eyes were shut closed. If she didn’t see, maybe it would’ve been less wrong. If she didn’t see, maybe Cat wouldn’t either. She could go home, kiss her girlfriend good night. Walk away. But there you were, pressed up against her, making her head spin like a carousel, fogging her brain with your scent, and your lips, and all of the times she pictured you like this, helpless and begging. She never looked at Cat how she looked at you. Cat never made her feel like she could faint at any given moment. Cat was safe, she was a sunny day. You were a thunderstorm, a cloud, soaking her up. When Ellie said she would have done something so much worse, she meant that.

Cat was right when she told her to stay away, she always was. When Ellie begged Cat to stop her ramblings, Cat told her she looks at you like she’s hungry. That it’s disgusting, that she wishes it was her. She was crying, and begging, and she was right. That’s why Ellie knocked on your door that way. One person she could save.

Ellie’s hands were firmly pressed up against the wall, locking you in.

“You dont know…” she whispered.

You whimpered silently at her words. You were aching everywhere, you just needed her to do something.

“Show me” you said, and it came out more as a plead. You were begging her.

Ellie leaned in, drawing her face closer to yours, and your lips delicately brushed against each other. The electrifying touch sent a shiver down your spine, evoking a soft, involuntary moan that escaped your lips. It went straight to her heart, and then slipped right to her cunt.

Her lips were plump against yours. Just barely touching.

She delicately brushed her lips against yours, causing a gentle collision that sent a jolt of electricity through both of you. A shaky breath escaped her mouth.

“Ellie…” you whispered. Ellie, just do it. you can’t take it anymore.

She abruptly slammed her hands against the wall, causing it to tremor ever so slightly. The suddenness of the action startled you, making you jump in response.

“Shit” she huffed.

And her lips weren’t against yours anymore, neither was she.

Ellie backed away. She couldn’t.

Your lips quivered, and there it was. Her precious thunderstorm erupting.

The tears came out hot, and sticky. They ran all over your cheeks. You let out a quiet sob. Ellie was staring, her breaths uneven and her mouth agape. She almost did what shes been dreaming of doing since the moment she saw you. Almost.

your legs betrayed you, giving out completely. You crumbled down onto the floor, unable to stand any longer. With tears welling up in your eyes, you instinctively curled up, bringing your head between your legs as you tried to suppress the sobs that threatened to consume you.

It was a truly pathetic sight, Ellie towering over your quivering body. It’s been two whole years, and you missed her every single day that passed. It was gnawing at you. Seeing them hand in hand, kissing on the street, making out behind the dumpster. Thinking of Ellie hugging her at night, caressing her skin, touching her everywhere, telling her she loves her, fucking her, tasting her and not you. It should have been you. But it couldn’t be.

If only you knew that when Ellie was between her thighs, you were the only one she thought of. If only you knew Ellie had to bite her lip till it bled to stop from screaming your name. That’s why Ellie always turned off the lights, That’s why Ellie shoved Cat’s face down on the bed with her entire palm when she took her from behind. That’s why she always closed her eyes.

Her body gave up on her, too.

She sat on the cold concrete floor, trying to steady her breaths.

“Look at me” she commanded. It was breathy, and shaky, more of a plea than a real command.

You wiped your tears.

“I can’t” you whispered.

“Please” she begged.

You mustered the strength to lift your face, raising your gaze to meet hers.

“I think about you all the time” you blurted.

She huffed in response. Your soft voice was killing her. She couldn’t even respond. She just watched.

“Ellie…” you whined. The distance between you was torturous. There was so much space, and at the same time, no space at all. You could still feel her lips brushing against yours. You wished you could taste her. She yearned for that even more. She felt like something was chaining her down to the floor, holding her captive.

What you did next, is something Ellie had buried deep inside her darkest fantasies.

You delicately caressed your smooth neckline, doe eyes burning through her’s.

Ellie swallowed deeply.

“What are you doing?” she mumbled, lower than a whisper. Her voice was raspy, and her pupils were blown out. She was imagining, for sure, hallucinating, intoxicated by the picture of you being pressed up against her. It couldn’t be real.

“I need you” you whimpered.

She almost crawled right to you right then and there. Her knees were spread open in front of you. Her breath hitched in her throat. Her heart felt like it was leaping out of her chest.

“You cant” she insisted. It felt like she tried to convince herself, and not you. You couldn’t. There’s no way.

“I want you” you whispered, lowering your hand to caress your breasts.

Something took over you. Being pent up with frustration for years birthed such a desperate sight, she couldn’t fathom it.

She grunted in response. Do that again and she’d lose her fucking mind.

You cupped your breast.

Ellie threw her head against the wall. She forgot how to breathe. Her nostrils were flared, and she almost slapped herself in order to convince her that this was real. This was happening.

“Holy shit” she wheezed.

“Please” you begged, and squeezed your breast forcefully. Your nippled hardened against the material, so you gave them a twist, sending a bolt of electricity right through your clothed cunt.

Ellie’s mouth was agape. She was transfixed, mesmerized. Her cheeks grew more red by the second. It was so fucking wrong, she almost told you to stop, but she couldn’t. Her voice felt dry and her brain was buzzing. Her ex best friend was so desperate for her she couldn’t even help herself.

The image of Cat went through her head. Cat seeing, walking in. Cat trembling and crying, telling her she told her so. Cat screaming at her that she’s an awful person, that she hurt her, That she should burn in hell.

Then, you took your shirt off.

And Cat was gone.

Her eyes were darting from your tits to your needy eyes. You were giving her that look she only saw in her dreams. That desperate, pathetic twinkle in your eye. She saw a girl look like that in an old porno she found. Ever since, that picture of your face replacing the actresses burned through her memory. She knew it was for her, you were showing her, but she looked like she wasn’t supposed to see, a peeping tom, a pervert. Her cunt twitched inside her tight black boxers. Cat never made her cunt feel like this.

The dainty lace bra adorned your body. you looked like an angel, eyes red from crying, cheeks still wet, chest rising up and down. She wanted to ruin you.

You stopped for a second, looked for a sign to keep going.

The room was silent, the only noises that muttered were your soft whimpers and Ellie’s harsh, uneven breaths.

“Take it off” she whispered. You almost couldn’t believe she said that. You nodded pathetically. She always knew you’d be like this. She imagined you nodding your head frantically, kneeling beneath her and undoing her belt, way too many times she wouldn’t dare to admit. Her heavy breaths were a confession to all of her sins.

You unclasped your bra, your tits spilling out of it with a sigh of relief.

Ellie was hypnotized, fully staring. She remembered the first tine she saw you in a bikini. Jesse noticed she was staring, and he gave her some advice. “Look at the ground or the sky, pretend there’s something super interesting going on there”

She didn’t need to pretend now.

“Fuck” she grunted, feeling her cunt twitch inside her briefs. Her mouth was agape, she wanted those nipples between her teeth. Her tongue slightly moved involuntarily inside her mouth, imitating the kitten licks she’d give your tits if she could. It was truly pathetic. Thank god you couldn’t see. Her fists were clenched, and she was forcing her feet onto the ground. If she pretended something was pulling her in, she wouldn’t crawl towards you and take you like she always wanted.

You toyed with your nipples, rolling them between your fingers, almost as if you read her mind.

“Spit on ‘em” Ellie demanded desperately.

“Ellie…” You whimpered, her voice was making you grow wetter by the second. If you took your pants off, she could see the wet patch that soaked through your panties, making them almost sheer. You were almost embarrassed, but it was too late now.

“Do it” she commanded.

“Do it for me” Ellie begged. She brought a hand up to cup at her perky clothed breast. She imagined it was you, your tits between her fingers. She wanted to squeeze the fat, take it in, spit on it, latch her mouth onto your nipples, slap them as you ride her thigh, or her face, or her whatever the fuck you wanted.

The saliva ran down your chest, droplets flowing at an incredibly slow pace, each and every one of them teasing Ellie, mocking her. Almost there, almost reaching your sensitive nipples. When it finally did, Ellie was breathing so heavy she almost wheezed.

You rubbed the spit all over your tits, glazing your nipples with the liquid, coating them shiny with your saliva - all for her. You were staring at ellie with your mouth open. You moaned at the sensation, making Ellie shift and slightly slide off the wall. She was gone.

“Feels so good” you whined.

“Fucking shit” She huffed. She bucked her hips, searching for that friction. She didn’t do it yet, but oh she will.

“Mhhm” you hummed, a high pitched moan escaping your lips.

Ellie almost went cross eyed.

“Need you, please” You whispered while massaging your breasts. You were squeezing the fat harshly, almost punishing yourself for being such a dirty, desperate girl.

“Show me” She begged, in between breaths.

“Show me how bad - shit”

You cupped your cunt, your hand feeling warm over it. Your clit twitched. Ellie let out a moan so deep, you almost came right then and there, all over your panties.

You circled your clit through your pants, teasing Ellie without even realizing. I can do it, and you can’t! It felt like you were mocking her.

“Take that shit off — fuck” she huffed. Her hand was resting on her thigh, pinching it. Stay down. Don’t crawl, don’t fuck, don’t cheat.

In a matter of six seconds, your pants were on the floor. You crossed your legs together in embarrassment. What if she saw how wet you were?

“Spread” She commanded.

You looked at her stupidity.

“Spread ‘em, please” Ellie begged.

You spread your legs slowly, revealing your soaked white cotton panties to Ellie. Her eyes rolled back at the sight.

“Fucking shit” she grunted.

Her hand met her own cunt and gave it a stinging slap, followed by a desperate grunt. She moved her veiny hand up and down, almost grabbing her pussy. She felt perverted, and sickly, and so, so good. The friction of her hand on her cunt was followed by a string of deep moans, chanting your name like a prayer. She didn’t even know how bad she needed it.

“Wider” She commanded.

You spread your legs so wide your thighs almost hurt. When Ellie saw that wet spot, she lost it.

“So wet” she whispered in disbelief.

“Show me that pussy” She whimpered.

“Show me that fucking pussy”

You moved your panties to the side, the cold air hitting your clit making you flinch. You swore you could cum just from clenching in and out, listening to the obscenities leaving her mouth.

“Holy shit” She moaned, and cupped her cunt forcefully.

“So pretty” she whispered. It was even prettier than she thought, glistening folds and a little puffy button poking out. She needed to see inside, everywhere.

“Spread it with your fingers” She grunted. You parted your lips with your pointer finger and your thumb, wide open for her. She saw how bad you were clenching, begging for something inside. Your puffy clit moved with every pull.

“Wanna fuck you so bad” she groaned, it was killing her.

“Need to see you Ellie, please, please” you begged.

With that whine leaving your mouth, Ellie unzipped her jeans, and pulled down her boxers slowly, revealing you of the most beautiful sight youve ever seen in your life.

Her thighs were creamy, a mound of soft, dark hair adorning her pubis. Her slick was shining on her milky inner thighs from the boxer briefs she took off slightly brushing on them. She was so wet, it almost glistened like a far away star, deep in the galaxy. Her mouth was parted and she looked famished.

Tiny droplets of sweat were shining on her forehead, making her hair stick to her face. She was a panting, desperate mess.

You couldn’t help but slide your hand up your thigh, and started running your fingers through your glistening folds. Finally. “Oh god, Ellie” you moaned. You wished those were her fingers, if you could, if you only could.

Ellie moaned like a porn star at the sight. You thought she might tease herself, might play with her cunt before doing something. She proved you wrong.

She slid two long fingers inside her aching hole, squelching sounds filling the air. She pumped them in and out, fucking herself like a madwoman. Her hungry eyes were fixated on your fingers caressing your needy cunt. Her mouth was watering, borderline drooling, soft “ah!”s escaping her lips.

You circled your clit slowly, and felt your lower stomach leap at the contact. You lapped your slick with your middle finger, and sucked on it. It was obscene. Ellie’s cunt twitched. She almost came.

“Good girl” She groaned at the sight.

“Faster” She commanded, a deep moan escaping her lips.

You fastened your pace, and she was looking you directly in the eyes while pumping her fingers inside her cunt. With every pump, you could see a milky cream coating her fingers, the sight alone made your puffy clit ache with pleasure.

It was so wrong, and obscene, and pathetic, and you almost came.

“Fucking shit — fuck yourself, show me, fuck yourself” She whimpered, fastening her pace as well. The moans that left her mouth were deep, bursting from the inside of her soul.

Her fucking ex best friend.

“E — Ellie m’close” you whined, inserting a finger inside your soaking hole.

“Can see how fucking tight you are - fuck”

“Faster, do it f’me baby faster” She groaned.

The harmony of your moans intertwined, creating an intoxicating symphony.

“Ellie — gonna cum, fuck” You babbled, drool running down your chin. You were so close, eyes rolling to the back of your Ellie filled brain.

“Please fuck me, please fuck me”

“Cu — Fuck, shit, m’cuming” Ellie grunted.

“Say my fucking name” She demanded, her words coming out so sloppy and ridiculous.

“Ellie — Ellie! Please!”

Ellie almost screamed. She wanted to tell you to come for her, wanted to hear the noises youd make, see your face twist and the screams of her name, but she couldn’t help herself, the sight of your desperate cunt and the look on your face, so stupid, so cumdrunk, so pathetic, begging her to fuck you - brought her to the edge. It errupted inside of her like a volcano, pumping and squeezing on her fingers. She rode her orgasm until it tickled and hurt.

When you came, Ellie almost shed a tear.

This wasn’t just wrong.

This was vile.

She pulled up her pants up and left without saying a word, too embarrassed to look you in the face.

When she got home, Cat was sound asleep on her bed. She gave her a delicate kiss on the cheek, and whispered;

“I’m so sorry”

[uhohnotthisagain]

Requited Love

Summary: Sam discovers his love for you in a not so clean dream, he doesn't realise his actions following the realisation would effect you so much.

Pairing: Sam Winchester x reader

Word count: 0.8k

Warnings: slight mentions of sex, angst, pining, makeout.

My Masterlists

Sam woke up in a sweat, but this time it wasn’t a nightmare. He could still feel the way your hands felt on his skin. The way your lips felt pressed against his. The way you felt wrapped around his cock. 

Holy shit was he actually thinking about his best friend that way. He rubbed his hands over his face before he felt movement next to him. He looked over at you sleeping, sprawled out with hair all over the place. You usually slept together in the same bed when out on a hunt. 

He tried his best to climb out of bed quietly so as not to disturb you, hoping a cold shower would rid him of those insane thoughts. 

–

Later, you’re all sitting at a diner, eating dinner. As you take a bite of your burger, Sam can’t help but notice the way your lips move as you chew, oddly attracted to the way they slightly pout when you chew. He shakes his head, trying to focus on anything but you. 

–

You and Dean are in deep conversation about which Led Zeppelin song is the best, sitting on the couch in the motel room whilst Sam does some research on the hunt. It was a pretty easy hunt so not a lot of effort was needed. Sam gave himself the excuse to get distracted. 

He watched the way your hair would swing when you talked to Dean, dramatically moving your hands as you spoke to emphasise your point. His eyes travel down your body, taking note of the way his old college t-shirt looked on your body, paired with the tight-fitting leggings that donned your lower half. 

He caught himself just before he started to imagine what you would look like without the clothes on. 

–

It was just you and Sam in the motel room. Dean had gone to the local bar for a few drinks, both you and Sam opting to stay in for the night. You couldn’t help but feel a little down. You noticed a few days ago that Sam hadn’t been talking much. You didn’t take much notice until you realised he was still talking to Dean, but seemed to be avoiding you. You didn’t know what you had done, but you were starting to feel self-conscious about your actions, trying to think of what you could have done to upset him. 

Sam was still sitting at the table, hunched over his laptop. You were watching some random movie that was on TV, not watching it properly. Your mind was too occupied trying to think of ways to get Sam to forgive you.  

“Sam?” You called to him. He hummed in response. 

“Did I do something?” He turned to look at you. “What?”

“Did I do something to hurt you?” He stared at you like you had two heads. “Of course not. Why would you think that?” 

“Because in the last week, you’ve barely spoken ten words to me. If I’ve done something wrong please tell me. I can’t fix it if you don’t tell me. You’re my best friend. I can’t not talk to you. I’m going crazy here.” You let out a frustrated breath after your short ramble. “I’m sorry for whatever it is I did. I’m sure it was unintentional and I won’t do it again.” Sam is looking down at his fidgeting hands, debating what to do next. “Listen, Y/N. You didn’t do anythi-” “Obviously I have! You haven’t spoken to me in a week. I’ve been putting up with Dean this entire time because you won’t talk to me. I don’t think I can handle this much longer.” Sam didn’t realise how much this was effecting you. He finally did when he noticed the tears streaming down your face. 

“Tell me what I can do to fix it.” You whispered, afraid that if you spoke any louder, it would come out in ugly sobs. 

Sam let himself debate his actions for one last second before making a decision. He took two long steps towards you before cupping your face in his hands, smashing his lips to yours. 

It took a second for you to respond, and Sam was about to pull away before you wrapped your arms around his neck, pulling him closer. You stayed like that until you had to pull away for air. “What was that?” You whispered. 

“I realised a week ago that I was in love with you. And I didn’t know what to do. I guess keeping my distance was the wrong way to go.” Sam whispered back. “Yeah, it was.” You respond, pulling him back down for another kiss. He wraps his arms around your waist, tapping your hip to signal for you to jump. He instantly catches you, and carries you towards the couch, sitting down with you straddling him. 

“Ew, what the fuck guys. A heads up would’ve been nice.” You hear from behind you. You turn to see Dean standing at the door, hand over his eyes. “Yeah, I’m sleeping in the Impala tonight.” He turns around and walks out without another word. 

“Should we go get him?” You ask Sam, not moving to get off of his lap. “Maybe in a few hours,” He responds, pulling you back in for another kiss. 

[neos127]

sim jaeyun x gn!reader | wanderlust

genre. fluff + established relationship wc. 1.1k cw. slightly suggestive notes. title rlly has nothing to do with the fic but the song is what i was listening to on repeat writing this so !

the cold blast of the air conditioner made goosebumps arise on your skin— or maybe it was due to the touch of jake who kept his warm hand on the inside of your thigh. you couldn’t really tell which of those two factors was making you shiver, but the inside of the car suddenly felt chillier despite the heat outside.

jake had parked at a nearly empty fast food parking lot, settled under a light that seemed to flicker every couple of minutes. the stereo played some song you had recommended to jake earlier that day, explaining how it had captured the ‘vibe’ of your late night drives very well. jake decided to test out that theory, having nothing to do that night so he decided to pick you up around eleven.

after finishing you greasy fries and burger the two of you sat in the car in silence, watching cars zoom by on a highway in the distance, basking in each others presence. you had been lost in thought until your boyfriend decided to light every single nerve in your body on fire by resting the palm of his hand on your upper thigh.

“the song is perfect for that late night vibe. you were right.” jake finally spoke, turning to look at you with a glint in his eye. you snapped out of your daze, almost forgetting the words that had just come from his mouth. the man in front of you was so mesmerizing, sometimes he made it difficult to focus.

“yeah…yeah. of course i’m right.” you mumbled, reaching a hand up to push back a strand of hair that fell against jake’s eyes. his hair had grown so long, and you were fond of the way it framed his perfect face and highlighted his features.

“are you okay, pretty? he asked before taking your hand in his free one, placing a lingering kiss on your palm. you sucked in a breath, all of the hairs on your body standing up once again.

“it’s hard to be mentally sane when you’re looking at me like that.” you sighed, the honesty of your statement made jake chuckle to himself.

he then decided to tease you a bit, leaning against the center console of the car, his face inching closer to yours. you backed up slightly, your head lightly hitting the window and you realized that it was impossible to avoid him in the small space. not that you actually wanted to, but boy did jake make you nervous.

“can i tell you a secret?” jake asked, a small smirk creeping up on his face. you shivered (not from the air conditioning) and nodded. jake leaned over the console even more, practically on top of you as his lips ghosted over yours. you sucked in a breath, closing your eyes as you waited for his next words.

“you make me feel even more insane. you’re so fuckin’ gorgeous, i can’t believe your mine.” he mumbled, his thick accent making your stomach flip.

“i love you.” you replied, barely getting the sentence out before jake pulled you into a rough kiss. he poured out all of his feelings into it, moving his mouth against yours as if he had been starved of your affection for months. he definitely hadn’t, considering the fact that jake always had to have his hands on you somehow. but whenever he kissed you, he became more desperate and that ignited a fire in your stomach.

you let out a low whine against jake’s mouth which only spurred him on. his grip on the back of your head became tighter, not enough to hurt you but enough to make you see how needy he was.

“i need you so bad.” jake groaned against your lips, barely pulling away before he leaned back in for another long kiss. you began to smile, breaking away from your boyfriend shyly.

“someone’s eager.” you teased, tracing his jawline before doing the same to his plump lips. he let out a sound similar to a whimper, his eyes widening once the clarity sunk in. you began to laugh at him, finding it kind of adorable how desperate your boyfriend was for you. only you could make him feel like that— it was nice to have that affect on him like he had on you.

“um, ignore that. i was possessed or something…” jake spoke up, all traces of his ‘alter ego’ gone as a blush spread across his face. you cooed at his sudden shyness, finding it amusing how jake could be an insane tease only to turn around and become a giggly blushing mess.

“don’t get all shy now. you said you needed me? i’m right here for you.” you shrugged, trying to seem seductive but internally cringing at your words. you and jake often made fun of each other for trying to be ‘hot’, but jake seemed too turned on to really care about that at the moment.

“i love you so much.” he groaned before kissing you once more, pulling you into his lap so he could be closer to you. jake slipped his hands under (his) your hoodie, his warm hands on your cold body made you sigh into his mouth and pull him impossibly closer. the song that had been playing on a loop in the background had drowned out in your ears, the only sound coming to your ears was your rapid heartbeat.

even though you were wrapped up in the feeling of jake’s touch and how his soft lips felt on yours, the sharp beep of a car in the distance made you jump slightly and remember where the two of you were parked. you had definitely seen emptier parking lots in your life, and the one behind a popular fast food restaurant still had a few cars lingering.

“you seriously wanna fuck me in this very well lit parking lot?” you asked teasingly once jake began to leave a trail of kisses against your neck, not wanting to stop his assault on your skin. he pulled away and pouted slightly before looking out the rear view mirror and taking note of the fact that there was an active line at the drive through only a few meters behind the car.

“you’re a mood killer.” he grumbled.

“no— i’m realistic.”

“still a mood killer.”

“jake.”

“y/n.”

the man below you pouted like a child, and you couldn’t help but pinch his cheek and ruffle his hair a bit. he really could get anything he wanted from you— but you’d rather not have your intimate time with your boyfriend discovered in public.

“another time?” you suggested, wiggling your eyebrows as you looked at jake. he smirked slightly as he watched you roll back into your seat, eagerly nodding his head in agreement.

“definitely.”

[cinnaleaf]

ESSENCE OF US - CH 17: FOREVER & FOR AFTER

Please read responsibly. This fic will get hot and heavy as the story progresses, 18+ only MDNI | CH 16 | MASTERLIST | Epilogue (soon)

summary: a fleeting encounter with a mysterious Trent leaves you wondering if fate is playing a bigger match. your paths continue to cross in unexpected places as the fragrances around you mirror the growing tension between you. maybe it's just a coincidence..or maybe its destiny in the making.

warnings: SMUT (oral m/f receiving, unprotected sex, praise, teasing, dirty talk), FLUFF (reconnection, personal growth, engagement), mild angst, alcohol mentions, food mentions, irl fire references, links for immersion wc: ~13.4k 💌: this couple has wrecked me. until next time ❤️ song inspo: For Us x dvsn (highly recc listening to feel the vibes)

The sound of your footsteps echoed softly in the empty tunnel, with the occasional drip of rainwater landing somewhere off in the distance. Trent’s hand was intertwined with yours, leading you down to a different area you weren’t all that familiar with.

“Where are we going?” you asked, glancing at him while he led you down the hall. You pulled at his jacket that was draped over your shoulders to warm you up.

“Dressing rooms,” Trent replied casually. “I just need to grab my stuff. It’ll just be us. Everyone’s gone by now.”

You followed him curiously as the hall opened into a larger space. Trent pushed the door open and held it for you, resting his hand on your lower back as you stepped inside. The energy was still in the air despite no one else being around, it was almost eerie, but you wandered further in, trailing your fingers lazily along the polished benches of the dressing room until you stopped in front of one that made you feel an overwhelming sense of emotions. 

Isaac Y/L/N

You brushed your fingers over the nameplate, frozen in the realization you were having. It was weird seeing your brother’s name in the same dressing room as Trent’s.

The jacket slipped from your shoulders slightly as you sat down in Ziggy’s spot, giving you a clear view of the name Alexander-Arnold across the room. Trent was crouched down in front, going through his bag, but his eyes met with yours when he noticed you staring at him.

“You okay?” He asked carefully while adjusting from his crouch to sit in his seat across from you.

You nodded, smiling sheepishly. “I’m okay..it’s just weird seeing Z’s name in here. It’s like I blinked and he went from begging my parents to play football to being in the prem.”

Trent leaned forward in his seat, smiling back at you with his hands clasped loosely. “He earned it though. More than most.”

“I know…” you spoke softly, staring back at Trent. “This whole night has been insane honestly.”

Trent stayed quiet while studying your face, but then he leaned back and shifted his expression to a more vulnerable look.

“I almost left,” he said suddenly.

You tilted your head, giving him a confused look. “What? Left where?”

“Liverpool” Trent clarified. “I almost left Liverpool.”

“Why would you even think about doing that?” you asked, fiddling with the zipper from his jacket hanging over you.

He breathed out slowly, dropping his gaze to the floor before catching yours again. “I didn’t feel right.”

You stared at him in disbelief, “But you’re–”

Trent cut you off, letting out a subdued laugh through a soft breath, void of any humour. “I felt stuck, Y/N. I tried different hobbies, tried throwing myself into football..I even tried dating but nothing worked. It felt like I was just floating. I was moving through everything but nothing was moving through me, y’know?”

You nodded slowly, you weren’t sure if you truly did know, but the vulnerability in Trent’s voice kept you quiet.

“And I thought maybe a new city, new people, something shiny and different would make me feel alive again.” He admitted, absentmindedly rubbing his hand over his jaw. “But even just thinking about it made me feel worse.”

You frowned at the thought of it all. “Why didn’t you leave?”

“I tried something else instead.” He glanced up at you with a small smile. “Therapy.”

You blinked in surprise. “Therapy???”

“Yeah,” he responded with a low chuckle. “Mo told me about this therapist...Dr. Ali. She called me out on all my shit, but she helped. A lot.”

Dr. Ali? My Dr. Ali??

Trent went on to describe a technique she used that 100% made you realize it was the same therapist that guided you through your own tangled mess of thoughts. You felt your jaw slack slightly, but you didn’t say anything, too stunned to interrupt him.

“Therapy made me realize I was running away from myself” Trent continued in a quieter voice. “Leaving wasn’t going to fix the fact that I didn’t know who I was without football. Or without…” He trailed off, meeting your eyes to complete his sentence. 

You swallowed hard, staring back into his eyes while your heart pounded against your chest, trying to process what he was saying. You were still stuck on the fact that he’d ever consider leaving, but the coincidence of having the same therapist without knowing it really threw you for a loop.

“I didn’t like it at first but therapy helped me work through a lot of shit even when I thought I did everything I could do here. But it wasn’t just that. Your brother helped me more than he’ll ever know.”

“Ziggy?” you added for clarification, as if you had any other brother besides him.

Trent gave you a soft smile. “Yeah. When he started training with us, he had that same spark he had when he hung around me at the park. He’s taller for sure, but he still looks like a kid next to us. Kind of reminds me of when I first started too.”

Trent’s words pulled at your heartstrings as you looked up at your brother’s nameplate and then back at Trent. “That’s sweet. He really looks up to you, T.”

Trent studied your face, baring into your soul from just a few steps away as he stood up and slowly made his way to you. “One day during a rough day at training, Ziggy gave me the same look you’re giving me right now and I knew I couldn’t leave.”

“What look?” you asked.

“Like you’re wondering if you made the wrong decision because you don’t know what happens next.” He cupped your chin with his warm palm, tilting your head up. He brushed his thumb over the corner of your bottom lip softly. “Like you’re trying to figure out if you should run away or just stay along for the ride.”

Trent’s eyes didn’t leave yours once as he kneeled down beside you, taking your left hand in his palm. He brought your hand to his lips, placing a kiss below the knuckle of your ring finger. “That day, I knew I couldn’t leave. And I’m glad I didn’t because if I did...I wouldn’t be here with you right now. Everything always leads me back to you.”

He wasn’t wrong though. Every wrong turn and every miss had both of you still orbiting around each other, even if it wasn’t visible. You felt fluttering in your chest that spread down to the pit of your stomach. The words Trent intentionally spoke encased you in warmth you weren’t sure you would ever feel again. The memory of the past two years filled with shedded tears, aches of missing him, and nights spent staring at your phone wondering if you should unblock him seemingly faded away like a polaroid in reverse, peeling back darkness until the colors redeveloped to lift the shadows and create an image that was now bathed in sunlight.

“Y/N..” Trent started again after your silence continued. “I’ll knit the threads of fate myself until they spell your name. I love you intentionally and I don’t want to spend another minute of my life without you.”

You smiled softly, feeling the corners of your lips tremble as you tilted your head toward him, whispering.

“Then don’t.”

And just like that, neither of you did.

The time that followed felt like stepping into a long lost rhythm. It was natural and easy this time around, feeling entirely new and like a breath of fresh air. Both of you decided to take time and figure out what this version of your relationship would look like by intentionally keeping things private. You only shared with a tightly knit group of family and friends, choosing not to share your rekindling with the world. You didn’t post much on your own social media accounts after the fire, and Trent barely posted on any of his because all the moments he wanted to share were always with you.

Except he still used one account pretty regularly to document something special: Scentimental

The one you still had blocked.

Unbeknownst to you, Trent still used the burner account to document every note he tested while trying to help you finish the fragrance you originally started when you first met him. The one you just couldn’t quite figure out the missing piece to. The memory of the night you vented to him about it replayed in his head constantly. The two of you were lounging on your couch with the TV dimly lighting the room. You started with your head on his lap, but by the time you got so worked up about it, you were sitting upright, motioning your hands around like you were in a meeting.

“I don’t know what to add and it’s pissing me off..” you sighed in frustration. “Everything I’ve tried smells nice, but it’s not it. I want it to smell like how we feel when we’re together. Like–like…”

“Like what?” Trent asked while leaning forward to listen.

You pressed your lips together to try and find the words. “Like warmth. But not the cozy kind. I want it to feel happy, bright, and alive.”

“Like when you wake up the first morning on holiday near the beach?” he suggested with humour in his tone.

You laughed, slightly intrigued but not yet ready to battle with the pride of figuring it out yourself. “Maybe. But not just that. It’s for us so I want it to feel like us. Like everything we’ve ever been through.”

From that day forward, Trent made it his mission to quietly log his attempts on his burner page. You had no idea he was sneaking random bottles into the house, testing scent strips at the training centre or in hotel rooms, each clip tagged with short captions for note taking.

In one video, he wafted a tester strip in front of the camera and sniffed it while frowning. “Smells spicy. Too spicy.” Another clip showed a failed attempt of using a smoky tobacco note. “This shit smells like a cigar lounge. Y/N would hate this.”

One day, he uploaded a final video clip. The view wobbled as Trent adjusted the camera and leaned into the frame holding a vial of gold benzoin liquid he ordered from southeast Asia. “I think this is it” he said while dabbing some of the liquid on his wrist to sniff it. His eyes shut for a few seconds as he took in the notes, and when they opened again, a golden smile spread across his face. “Yeah, this is the one.” He held the vial up to the light, inspecting it with a newfound sense of clarity. “It’s warm and sweet like a honeyed vanilla, but not too strong. It feels like us…like serendipity.” Trent placed the vial on the table with a clink, leaning back in his chair and dragging his fingers over the stubble on his jawline. The camera kept recording as Trent stared off, lost in thought. The faint sounds of outside traffic filled the silence until he let out a quiet sigh, reaching for the hotel notepad on the desk. When the pen hit the paper, the first few lines came slowly as he crafted the words that were running through his head for a long time. His handwriting was a bit messier by the time he hit the third line, spilling out his thoughts faster than his hand could keep up with.

When he finally finished, he held the paper in front of him and read it back to himself with a faint crease in his brow, then he ripped it from the pad, carefully folding it and tucking it into his pocket with a soft chuckle. Trent glanced at the camera again, twitching his lips into an awkward smile. “Alright, so…” He rubbed the back of his neck nervously before continuing again. “I’m pretty sure this is it.” He picked up the vial of benzoin and rolled it between his palms before setting it back down. “But now it’s on me to do the other part.”

He paused hesitantly, but then continued. “I’m gonna ask Y/N to marry me.”

Trent fiddled with the pen in his hand, looking away from the camera as he took a deep breath. “I’ve been thinking about this for ages and I’ve had this ring–” He stopped himself, laughing in a self-deprecating way. “I don’t even wanna say how long I’ve had it because it’s embarrassing but it’s just…”

His voice grew smaller again, as he glanced at the vial again before speaking. “It’s mad, innit? She’s my person. I know it..I’ve always known it. But now that it’s actually time to ask her, I’m bricking it.” Trent blinked up at the ceiling as his eyes became glossed with tears. He took a deep exhale through his nose. “What if she says no though? Then what?” he whispered more to himself than to the camera, but then he shook his head like he was trying to shake the thought. “Nah. Nah. She won’t say no. She can’t say no. We’ve come too far, right?”

Trent laughed quietly, wiping his thumb discreetly under his eye. “I sound like one of those lads in the Love Island confessionals right now. Why am I speaking to a camera about this?” he muttered, rubbing the bridge of his nose. After another stretch of silence, he looked directly into the camera with a face that can only be described as terrified, but very deeply in love.

“I just hope she says yes” he said softly with a hesitant smile, tapping his finger over his screen to end the recording before he could get any more emotional about it. The weeks that mirrored the videos he posted were filled with small, but intentional steps to build your forever. While Trent was secretly testing notes, the two of you were creating memories to match, each one more beautiful than the last.

One night, after the twins said they’d be out late, you and Trent decided to seize the rare opportunity to spend a quiet night together. The two of you lounged in the bonus room upstairs, which was mostly meant to be a ‘man cave’ for Ziggy, but somehow turned into a more communal space for everyone in the house. You had a blanket draped over your lap, ready to watch a show called Giri/Haji – a Japanese-British crime drama you knew he’d love.

“What’s this about again?” he asked as the show started playing.

You cuddled up next to Trent, giving him the rundown as the Netflix sound played. “It’s about this detective named Kenzo who’s trying to find his brother in London but it’s not the typical cop drama. It has all these family dynamics and it switches between Japanese and English. Trust me, it’s good.”

“I trust you.” Trent chuckled, pulling you closer to him as he wrapped his arm around you. Neither of you paid attention for long. Somewhere between the opening scenes and Kenzo’s arrival in London, Trent’s hands slipped under the blanket draped over you, tracing slow, lazy patterns on your thigh, edging higher and higher until you shivered, but not from being cold.

“Trent…” you whispered, trying to sound stern, but the minute his lips grazed over your neck you lost all composure.

“Mm?” he murmured while his fingers fully explored the curves and crevices of your body.

You tilted your head back, moaning softly. “I want you so bad right now…”

Trent grinned against your skin, stamping his words on your neck. “C’mere then.” Just as his lips crashed into yours, footsteps thudded up the stairs. You didn’t hear any of it between the noise of the TV and your thoughts drifting in and out of a lust filled haze.

“Hey!” Ziggy’s voice boomed through the staircase. “We’re ba–”

“What the fuck?” you shrieked, yanking the blanket higher so he wouldn’t see where Trent’s hands currently were.

“I fucking knew it!” he exclaimed, turning the lights back on with a lot of dramatics. “You’re both disgusting. Is this what you do when we’re gone? Out in the open?? Right in front of my bedroom???”

“Get out!” you glared at your brother while Trent discreetly fixed your clothing. 

“Nah, I’m staying” Ziggy answered smugly, plopping his body directly between the two of you on the couch.

Trent sighed heavily, running his hand over his face because the twins cockblocking your alone time was becoming increasingly more common. “Bro, don’t you have something better to do?”

“Nope, not really,” Ziggy replied with a grin, grabbing controllers from his gaming setup. “Mario Kart, anyone?” Much to your dismay, Ezzie appeared a few minutes later, holding a bag of snacks with a grin. “Sorry to interrupt. Mind if I squeeze in?” She flopped on the couch next to Ziggy with her own controller, creating a twin barricade.

You buried your face in your hands, groaning out of frustration. “Why are you both here? You said you were going to be out late!”

Ezzie shrugged, popping some snacks into her mouth. “Change of plans. The vibe at the club was off. So…are we playing or what?”

Trent gave you a smirk as he grabbed two controllers and handed one to you, making you roll your eyes in playful annoyance. Despite the twins’ precise interruptions, your nights with Trent were still full of lots of love and quiet moments for connection. The time you spent with him was the happiest you’d ever been. When Trent had more time off from football, you explored some of the world’s most beautiful, hidden corners. 

In the Dominican Republic, you found yourselves in the secluded beauty of Playa Ermitaño in Samaná. The journey to get there was its own adventure and included boarding a tiny boat that skidded across the Caribbean water and past lush green cliffs that jutted out of the sea. You teased Trent the whole way, watching him clutch the side of the boat every time it rocked too hard against a wave.

“Not a fan of the ride, are you?” you asked, laughing just as another small splash hit his face.

“The boat could be bigger, no? I feel like I’m gonna slip off!” he yelled out, gripping the railing tighter when a bigger wave hit.

You rolled your eyes at his dramatics, tugging on his arm to pry him off the railing. “Relax baby. We’re fine. It’s not that deep.”

“Literally or figuratively? Cause both are mad for you to say to me right now.” he muttered while gripping the railing as another wave rocked the boat.

By the time you reached the shore, the sight of the beach was enough to make him forget the ride. The sand was soft, white, and stretched into a crescent shape, framed by tall cliffs and thick greenery. The water was clear enough to see coral reef down below, and the only sounds were the small lap of waves and occasional rustle of palm trees swaying in the breeze. A small group of locals greeted you with smiles, offering you plates of traditional food like grilled fish in banana leaf and fried plantains. After your meal, you coaxed Trent into a calm and shallow edge of water near the shore. He stepped in hesitantly, keeping close to where his feet could touch the sand.

“So you’re really not going to swim?” you asked, floating just a few doggy paddles away.

“I’m in the water. That’s swimming, yeah?” he argued, gesturing around him like standing in waist deep water counted as swimming.

“No..you’re wading. There’s a difference.” You swam closer, kicking your legs as you leaned forward to rest your hands on his shoulders. “Don’t worry, T. I’ll save you if a Caribbean mermaid pulls you under.”

“Baby..don’t even joke like that” he muttered, staring at the saltwater clinging to your skin. Something about the way the sunlight glistened off your wet skin caught his attention even more, and his hands found your waist under the water, pulling you closer while you wrapped your legs around him. “You look so sexy in this bikini baby. Need to take it off of you.” His voice dropped to a tone only you could hear as he brushed his lips against the corner of your mouth.

“Do you?” you whispered back teasingly, grinning while your hands trailed from his shoulders to the back of his neck. It wasn’t long before he had you pinned up against a shallow rock, hidden from view by the cliffs and the water lapping at your thighs. You broke apart when you heard some laughter from another group arriving on the beach and Trent groaned, resting his lips on your neck. “Saved by the tourists” you teased while smoothing your hand over his damp curls. You pushed off of him and back into the water as he watched you swim away with amused and slightly frustrated smile on his face.

In Greece, you explored more secluded islands that felt like old Greece. These trips weren’t the Mykonos and Santorini tourist spots you saw on every influencer’s feed. Instead, you hopped around small slices of paradise like Lipsi and Donoussa where the locals and village cats outnumbered the visitors, and luxury yachts were far and few between.

After a day of wandering around cobblestone streets, you found yourselves in a taverna tucked behind a row of olive trees. The Mediterranean breeze carried the scent of lemon and oregano from the kitchen as the two of you sat under the glow of hanging lights above you, drinking ouzo and laughing like you were the only two people that existed in the world.

“You’re gonna hate this” Trent grinned, holding up his glass of ouzo.

You tilted your head, confused. “What? Why? It tastes fine to me.”

“Nah, not that. What I’m about to say..” he replied, grinning while leaning back in his chair. Trent gestured around the taverna, swishing the ouzo in his glass. “The food, the drinks, the old man who just served us like we’re his family..it’s nice, innit? Good vibes.”

You narrowed your eyes, cutting your eyes at him as you caught on. “What are you on about?”

“I’m saying we could live here” Trent’s smile grew wider. “Just drop everything and buy a house in a little village with whitewashed walls. You could make perfumes from olives or something. I’ll teach kids football and...uh..I don’t know? Fish or something.”

You stared at him, trying to gauge if he was serious. “T.. you can barely swim and I don’t think olive tree perfume is a thing.”

“Not yet,” he countered with a smirk. “But if anyone can make it a thing, it’s you. And I don’t have to swim that far. I’ll just catch some little fish for dinner. Bare hands.”

You snorted, shaking your head at his nonsense. “Mhmm. And I’ll sell my olive perfumes to the two tourists that accidentally end up here every year.”

“Yeah, exactly.” he nodded like you just made his point. “The simple life. Just us. Doesn’t that sound nice?”

As ridiculous as the idea sounded, that little life sounded intriguing, even if it wasn’t all that possible. You looked at his softly illuminated face over the rim of your glass as his smile curved into something just as bright as the Mediterranean sun.

“You would go mad after two weeks” you teased.

“Yeah.. probably,” he admitted, laughing. “But it’d be a good two weeks.”

You smiled, leaning forward to rest your chin on your hand as you stared at him. “I think I like this little life we’re building though. Even if it’s not here.” 

And just like that – the ouzo, the sea breeze, and the little taverna existed just for the two of you.

Eventually, you finally made your way to the villa in St. Barts you were supposed to travel to around the time Les Notes d’Amour burned down. It looked like paradise, but calling it paradise might’ve been a little unfair to Trent, who was sprawled out on the bed, completely wrecked and staring at the ceiling like he was praying for some type of intervention after the multiple rounds you had.

“I can’t baby. I’m finished,” he muttered in a tired voice.

You were on top of him, not taking his answer seriously. “T, you said that last time and then you started it up again.”

“Yeah, but I’m sure this time.” 

The two of you explored every crevice of the villa in ways that could never make it to any booking listing the moment you arrived. The outdoor shower with the view of the ocean was the first stop, followed by the pool deck, the plush couch in the main lounge, against the trunk of a palm tree, over the balcony, and finally the bed in the master suite. Not to mention the quick detour against the marble counter in the bathroom before your dinner reservations, or the quickie you had bent over the outdoor kitchen area. But still, you were insatiable somehow.

“I need more,” you pleaded, running your nails down his chest.

Trent groaned and covered his face with one hand. “Baby, you drained me dry, literally. There’s nothing left. You won..I concede. Throw in the white flag or whatever you want me to do.”

You pouted, jutting your bottom lip out while leaning closer to brush your lips against his ear. “You don’t have anything left for me?”

Trent peeked at you from his hand and the guilty look on his face made you giggle. He was a mess with a sheen of sweat covering his upper body, and a look in his eyes that said he would if he could, but he really couldn’t. “Baby..I swear if I had anything left you’d get it.” he promised in a soft voice. “But you tapped me out. I can’t even get it up anymore, I tried. I’m fucking knackered.”

You sighed, shifting to lay on his chest while his fingers trailed down your back. “Do you think it would be any different if we came here when we were supposed to?” you asked in a muffled voice against his skin.

Trent wrapped his arm around you to hold you closer. “Nahhh..it wouldn’t have felt like this.”

You lifted your head to meet his eye. “What do you mean?”

“I mean we weren’t us then. Not like this, anyway.” He paused to kiss your forehead. “This feels right. Like it was lined up the way it was meant to.”

“You’re too sweet. I don’t deserve you,” you whispered.

“Yes you do, Y/N,” he replied with no hesitation. “You deserve all of this, and I’m gonna spend every day making sure you know it.” You smiled, tracing your first initial, adding ‘AA’ at the end on his chest absentmindedly. You were finally thinking about it, but you didn’t know if you were ready for it. Every holiday you went on, you thought he may finally pop the question, but he never did. It didn’t bother you all that much, you were enjoying spending quiet moments alone with him – even if you were daydreaming about marrying him increasingly more often. You looked back up at Trent, who was now passed out after his exhaustion caught up to him. You stayed there, pressing your ear against his chest as the rhythm of his heartbeat created melodies with the crash of ocean waves from the shore, lulling you to sleep. You were comfortable, even if neither of you put an official title on what was next – every holiday, late night convo, and quiet minutes spent together felt like steps forward.

A few months later, you and Trent were seated at a conference table for a meeting with your architect as you stared at a huge blueprint of your future home. 

“Alright, so I was thinking this area here," Trent said, tapping on the living room section with his finger, “should be open enough to add a trophy display. Something with lights and glass. I want it to be the first thing people see when they walk in.”

You squinted at the plans with a frown creeping on your face. “A trophy area? Are you serious? In the living room like a museum??”

“Nah, it’s not a museum baby.” Trent looked somewhat offended that you were shooting his suggestion down. “Where else am I supposed to put my Ballon d’Or when I win it?”

You couldn’t help it; the laugh burst out of you. “Riiight, because that’s right around the corner.”

Trent snapped his head to you, smirking while also giving you a glare. “When I win, you’ll be the one polishing it.”

“Um, no. I’m not your maid.” You shook your head and leaned forward to study the plans again. “And if you get to have a space for your trophies, then I’m getting a fragrance room. You don’t need a whole room to hold a few trophies.”

“A few?” he repeated in an offended tone. “I have more than a few and I’ll be getting loads more.”

The architect, a patient older man with greying hair, was listening to all of your bickering but he eventually cleared his throat to intervene. “Maybe we can consider a multipurpose space? Something that can display his awards but also house other elements like art or personal collections?”

“Or fragrances” you interjected with a cheeky grin, knowing Trent was probably rolling his eyes next to you.

“Fine,” Trent dramatically sighed, leaning back in his chair. “As long as the gym stays. I need that for work.”

You scoffed as you eyed the massive size of the home gym on the blueprint. “Trent.. you literally train at AXA every day. You don’t need a huge gym at home too.”

“Yeah, but AXA doesn’t have you walking around in leggings and tiny tops” he smirked, making you playfully shove him. “I need enough mirrors in there so I can see that.”

“Flirting with me isn’t going to change my mind” you countered back while trying to hide the smile creeping up on your face.

The architect stepped in again and shifted the conversation back to something more practical. “We can scale the gym down a bit and allocate the space for a nursery in the future? Or a dual purpose area?” 

The mention of a nursery made both of you go quiet. You looked at Trent, who had a soft expression on his face. “Yeah... a nursery. I like that idea.”

You took a deep breath, not sure if you were ready to start prepping for babies that didn’t exist yet, so you switched the conversation back to the gym to mask the emotions you felt. “You’re just lifting weights, T. I don’t get why you need a gym here.”

Trent leaned in closer to you, smirking as he loudly whispered in your ear. “You don’t complain when I have to lift you up and help you when you get tired on top.”

“Oh my god, shut up!” you whispered back just as loud, trying to hide the secondhand embarrassment you got from your man mentioning that in front of some greying old man. The architect coughed into his hand, pretending he didn’t hear anything, but you knew he probably heard it all.

After what felt like hours of going back and forth – arguing over color schemes (you vetoed Trent’s suggestion of an all grey scheme), kitchen appliances (he insisted he needed an espresso machine even though he barely drank coffee), and the location of the dining room (closer to the garden was your compromise) – you finally reached an agreement that put a smile on everyone’s face.

The architect made note of the updates with a satisfying nod. “I think we finally have a solid plan here. You’ll both be very happy.”

You leaned back in your chair, looking over at Trent who was taking pictures of the plan with his phone. “You know…” you tapped your fingers on the table, ready to egg him on from all the terrible design ideas he had. “I could probably just buy you out of your contract with how much money I make now from Rêveur. Then you wouldn’t need a gym at all..”

Trent shook his head, laughing at you. “You think you’re that rich, huh?”

“Baby…” you grinned smugly. “I know I am.”

He laughed, reaching to hold your hand. “Good thing I’m with you then. Got a sugar mama already in case shit goes south.”

“Absolutely the fuck not” you argued back while the architect packed up his things.

When the meeting wrapped, you looked over plans one last time, imagining what it would look like when it was finally done. It wasn’t just any house anymore. This was a home – yours, his, and maybe someday, a little more.

Another night on a full moon, you and Trent found yourselves at Lovebirds – a favorite escape whenever Trent managed to carve free time out of his busy schedule. But eventually, going there turned into a monthly ritual. The restaurant was silent except for the occasional clink of a pan in the kitchen. Trent booked it out just for the two of you and your favorite chef who made you her official guinea pigs for experimental dishes she wanted to add to the menu.

“Okay, lovebirds” she called from the kitchen, her voice carried over your date night playlist you asked her to play over the sound system. “You’re on dish duty tonight. You can’t keep getting off this easily if you’re going to keep me here all night. I don’t care if he’s a footballer.”

You smirked at Trent as the chef appeared with a tray of ingredients. “Think you can handle it, T? Or are you going to burn something again?”

“First of all, that was ONE time. You can’t blame me for that, the oven timer was way off.”

The chef laughed while setting the tray down. “The oven timer was fine, Trent. You were just too busy staring at Y/N to notice your soufflé collapsing and burning to a crisp.”

You laughed loudly, watching Trent shake his head. He wouldn’t admit it was his fault, but he was supposed to be on oven duty that night. “She’s lying” he said while nudging your knee under the table.

“She’s not” you teased, standing up to pull him with you to the open kitchen. “Let’s see if you can redeem yourself baby.” The chef handed you each a spoon and started yelling instructions like you were both her actual employees, though she wasn’t being all that serious and was more amused than anything. The night’s experiment was a roasted aubergine spread with pomegranate molasses.

“Mix it slowly Y/N” the chef instructed. “And Trent, chop those herbs really fine. No big chunks…got it?”

“Yes, Chef” you both said in unison as you got to work. You were concentrating, but when you eyed Trent’s attempts at chopping the herbs ‘fine’, you giggled. “T, those aren’t fine. You barely chopped those.”

He held up his uneven pile of herbs. “I did chop them. It’s….rustic. You’ll love it.” 

“It’s lazy” you retorted while reaching over to take the knife from him. “Here, I’ll show–”

Before you had a chance to finish your sentence, Trent snatched the spoon from your bowl and dipped it into the aubergine spread you were mixing after quickly adding the herbs. “T! That’s not ready yet!” 

Trent couldn’t care any less and popped the spoon into his mouth, humming dramatically. “Nah, it’s good. Perfect even. Probably because I chopped the herbs.” You groaned but couldn’t keep the smile off your face as you swatted his arm. The chef laughed from the other side of the counter, muttering under her breath about how hopelessly in love the two of you were.

A few minutes later, you leaned over to taste the spread, licking the side of your spoon and catching some of the sauce on your lip without realizing it. Trent noticed instantly and leaned in close with a playful look in his eyes. 

“Don’t move” he whispered, brushing his thumb over your lip.

You froze and your eyes snapped to him as he leaned in and kissed the corner of your mouth, very intentionally. When he pulled back, he swept his tongue across his lips like he was savoring the taste.

“What was that for?” you asked a little breathier than intended.

“You had sauce on your lip” Trent said nonchalantly, going back to his chopping like nothing happened.

You frowned, touching your lip. “No, I didn’t.”

He smirked without looking up. “Yeah.. you did.”

The chef yelled from the other side of the kitchen to interrupt your little moment. “If you two are done flirting now, I’d like to eat before the next full moon!” You smiled, turning back to the spread while Trent was still smirking with his eyes dancing over to yours every couple of minutes. By the time you sat down to eat, the aubergine spread was perfect, even with all the distractions. The chef declared it her new favorite and sent you home with a jar of it as a thank you for being her “favorite disaster couple.”

All the memories you spent with Trent stayed fresh in your mind, but time waited for no one, and before you knew it – Camille’s wedding day was here. There were months of planning, fittings, reasoning with her through bridezilla meltdowns, and trying to talk her out of a custom drone show for the occasion. When you finally arrived at the countryside venue, you had to admit her and Jules really outdid themselves.

As the maid of honour, you stood by Camille’s side through every meticulously timed minute of the ceremony, dressed in an elegant sage gown – because apparently laurel wasn’t the move anymore. You focused on Camille for the most part, but you felt the unmistakable pull from Trent’s presence somewhere in the crowd of people. You didn’t dare look at him directly, but you could feel his eyes on you like a magnet. Having Trent there didn’t make you as nervous, even as Camille whispered a frantic “don’t cry or you’ll make me cry and our pictures will be ruined” under her breath. 

You were a crier at weddings. 

A big one.

The ceremony moved in slow motion as every vow and violin string stretched the minutes. You were so focused on not crying that by the time Camille and Jules finally kissed and the applause came, you let out a deep breath and caught yourself glancing toward Trent for the first time. He wasn’t clapping; his hands were resting in his lap, but his face held a certain look of love that made you want to be next to him immediately. The entire time he was never focused on Camille and Jules – his eyes were on you.

Hours later, the reception party popped off with a bang. Drinks were flowing in every corner and people on the dance floor were having the time of their lives rapping along to a Kendrick Lamar song Jules just had to have the DJ play. You successfully delivered your speech afterwards with a little liquid courage and managed to not trip over your words or burst into tears which was a win in itself. At some point, Camille insisted on you joining the bouquet toss despite not wanting to participate at all. You were drunk off your ass and too busy trying to act as normal as possible. When she threw it you weren’t even paying attention. One minute you were laughing at something Jules’ cousin said, and the next – the bouquet smacked you in the chest before you even had time to realize what was happening, catching it in your arms instinctively. Everyone in the reception area cheered for you and Camille squealed from across the room.

“It’s a signnn!” she yelled while clapping, which sobered you up instantly.

“Of course this would only happen to me” you muttered under your breath, trying to hide the embarrassment you felt from all the attention. People at the wedding knew you and Trent were exes at one point, but no one but a few knew you had been back together for a long while. You were hoping no one would catch on.

Later, you found Trent grinning ear to ear while sitting at a table off to the side in a quiet corner. “Didn’t know you were so competitive” he teased as you sat down beside him.

“I wasn’t even trying!” you argued while holding the bouquet up. “This thing attacked ME. Not the other way around.”

“Yeah, sure...” he dragged the words out with a sly smirk. “The bouquet jumped out of Camille’s hands and landed in yours. Unless you have powers like Matilda, I don’t know about that, baby.” You rolled your eyes because that’s exactly what happened, but then you started laughing – courtesy of the champagne you had in your other hand.

The night kept going until you and Trent ended up on the balcony in the cool night air. The venue’s garden stretched out below, bathed in the moonlight as you leaned against the railing. Trent was next to you, nursing his own glass of champagne because he was way too drunk for his own good.

“You know what this means now, right?” he asked, keeping his eye on you.

“What means what?” You squinted at him in confusion.

“The bouquet” he gave you a pointed look. “You caught it, so now I have to marry you.”

You snorted, turning to face him fully. “So that’s how this works? A bridal bouquet decides my entire future?”

“Tradition is tradition.” Trent set his champagne down on a decorative table and drunkenly dropped to one knee.

“T..what are you doing?” you asked, laughing as he grabbed your hand and kissed it.

“Fulfilling our destiny” he slurred, holding your hand up like he was ready to decorate it with an invisible ring. “Y/N, will you –”

“Get up!” you cut him off, laughing so hard you could barely breathe. “Baby, you’re sooo drunk right now.”

“Drunk words are sober thoughts” He dropped his voice as he stood up to slide his free arm around your waist while the other still held on to your hand.

“You’re going to be embarrassed when I tell you about this tomorrow morning” you giggled, tilting your head a little as his lips drunkenly trailed your skin with soft, lazy kisses.

“You have no idea” he kissed your neck again, but this time his next words were very slurred and too indecipherable. “I’m planning it all right now and you have no idea.”

A couple months later, Trent sat at Camille’s dining table, resting his hands on both sides of a small custom box he couldn’t stop messing with. Camille was sitting in her chair drinking a smoothie filled with vitamins now that her wine drinking days were temporarily retired. “I can’t believe you’re finally going to ask her. I didn’t have that on my bingo card this year” she teased while tucking a strand of hair behind her ear. “The man who takes forever to make decisions is finally going to propose to my best friend?” 

Trent leaned back in the chair, running a hand down his face in annoyance. “Are you going to help me or just chat shit the whole time I’m here?”

“Both” Camille replied frankly, smirking and folding her arms. “Why do you look so nervous?”

Trent hesitated while tapping his fingers on the table. “I’m scared shitless. What if she’s not ready?”

Camille laughed as she took another small sip of her smoothie. “If you wait until she’s completely ready you’ll be proposing when you’re both dead. Y/N is never going to give you a sign that says ‘hey i’m ready now’. But I’m sure she’ll say yes..I’ve seen her Pinterest boards.”

“Pinterest? She has wedding stuff saved?”

Camille nodded. “She’s fully planned out your lives for the next 5 years. Just don’t do anything stupid like big balloons in a hotel room or writing it on a plate with chocolate. She’ll definitely say no if you do that.”

“Nah, none of that. I already planned it out.”

“Oh?” Camille inquired, leaning forward. “What’s your plan, dreamer boy?”

Trent cut his eyes at Camille as he pulled out a notebook that looked like it saw better days at some point in time. “How do you know about that name?”

“Don’t worry about it,” Camille laughed, leaning forward curiously.

Trent flipped to a page covered in lots of scribbles, some crossed out and others underlined with confirmation. “I gotta finish this fragrance she was working on when we first met,” he explained. “I want to add benzoin. It reminds me of us whenever I smell it.”

Camille smiled in awe from the amount of intention he placed in preparing this for you. “You really thought all this through, huh?”

He nodded, closing the notebook. “I need your help bottling it though. It has to be perfect for her.”

“Couldn’t you do it yourself?” she tried to tease, but her lash line was watering and threatening to spill over.

“Nah, not me. I want it to be right. You’re the only other person I trust with this besides her.” Trent admitted while sliding a custom box toward her. When Camille opened it, there were three cutouts, each engraved with celestial symbols – the sun, moon, and an eclipse. Trent carefully placed a bottle of Rêveur into the sun’s slot, then he placed a bottle of Vanille Étoilée he took from your personal collection in the moon’s cut out. Trent handed Camille a third bottle he designed for the new fragrance.

“It’s called Serendipité,” he added in a low tone.

Camille traced the bottle’s engraving with her thumb and then looked up at Trent. “And where is all of this happening?”

“Maui” Trent answered quickly. “Long flight but it’ll be worth it for her.”

Camille cocked her eyebrow. “That’s super far...why Maui?”

Trent rubbed the back of his neck and blew out a long winded breath. “It’s the best place on earth for us to watch the sun set and the moon rise. And it’s calm. No one will bother us there.”

Camille blinked a few times as her eyes filled with tears. She sniffed, waving her hands in front of her face like it would stop her tears from spilling over.

“Whoa..what did I say?” Trent asked, confused at why she suddenly broke into tears. 

Camille dabbed at her eyes, sighing with a watery laugh. “I’m fine. It’s just.. I’ve never seen this part of your relationship with her. You’re so nervous and thoughtful about it and it’s–” She paused, biting her lip as another wave of tears erupted. “She’s so happy Trent. And I’m so glad you both finally got it right. That’s all. Don’t mind me.”

“Camille…”

“Don’t” she pointed at him through her tears. “Do not make me cry any more than I already am. I’m all over the place right now. Just take care of her okay? You already are, but keep it up.”

Trent nodded, giving Camille a side hug. “Always.” Camille took a deep breath, wiping away the rest of her tears as she took the bottle and added the last note. “And make sure her nails are done before you ask or she’s going to kill you.” 

Trent laughed, reaching for the box as Camille slid the finished bottle across the table. “Got it. Thanks for the heads up.” He placed the final bottle into its spot in the box. Camille absentmindedly placed a hand over the small bump appearing on her stomach, hesitating before she finally spoke up.

“You two can’t keep going on holiday around the world like this. I’m gonna need my best friend for moral support and both of you as babysitters a few months from now.”

“Huh?”

“Nothing. Just focus on your proposal, dreamer boy” Camille cut him off with a smile, still protectively cradling her small baby bump.

--

As time ticked by, you got closer to your forever, but you would have never guessed the way it came.

Trent insisted on pampering you one day, so you sat in the nail salon, scrolling through your phone for nail ideas as Ezzie gandered at the wall of polishes. She was always quicker than you when it came to choosing – you could sit there for hours trying to choose between two options. Which was why you were still sitting with sample swatches fanned out in front of you, paralyzed by indecision.

“I don’t think you should go with summer colors” Ezzie broke through the tip taps of you on your phone. She squinted at one of the options in front of her.

“What? Why not? You told me summer pastels were in right now!” You held up the sample swatches so she could see them. “You don’t like any of these? What about ‘Sucre Dreamer’? That’s a cute nail color!”

Ezzie made a face. “I mean it is cute...but I think you should try something different.” She wanted to throw you off as much as possible so you wouldn’t suspect anything. “Try this one instead.” She grabbed a bottle of polish from the wall, a soft nude that complimented your skin tone well. She flipped the bottle over to show the name, making her face light up. “It’s called ‘Forever and After’. That’s so fitting.”

“Fitting for what? A wedding I’m not having?”

“Nooooo...who said anything about a wedding? That’s madness…” she wanted to sway you away from any sort of engagement or wedding talk. “But I think it’ll look amazing on you. Just trust me on this.”

You looked at her skeptically, but eventually handed the bottle to the nail tech, “Fine but if I hate it, you’re never picking my nail colors again.”

Ezzie sat back down next to you, crossing her legs and smiling while the nail tech added the color to your nails. “You’re gonna love it.”

The color was perfect once it was finally finished, and you weren’t deeping the name like your sister originally thought you would, thankfully. When you stepped out of the salon with Ezzie, you checked your phone. “Trent’s picking us up for brunch at Lovebirds,” you told Ezzie while checking the time. Just as you were about to ring him to let him know you were ready, another car pulled up and the window rolled down to reveal Jude’s smiling face, but he was in the driver’s seat this time.

“Ladies..”

“About damn time! You’re late!” Ezzie announced with an annoyed tone as she hopped into the passenger seat. She leaned over, lowering her voice to a whisper. “Did you get everything? Did you get their luggage?”

Jude nodded with a grin and you squinted at them in confusion. “Uh...what is going on here?”

“Nothing.” Jude got out of the car, opening the door to the back seat to let you in. “Hop in, passenger princess.” He couldn’t wait to use that against you. You rolled your eyes while sliding into the back seat, checking your phone for any texts from Trent, but there weren’t any. “I thought we were going to brunch?”

“We’re taking a little detour..” Jude confessed, driving farther and farther away from the restaurant.

“A detour to where exactly??” you asked, peering out the window in confusion. “I really don’t like surprises.”

Ezzie shifted her body to look at you in the backseat, smiling eagerly. “Well you’re going to love this surprise. Promise. Just hang tight.” Before you knew it, you arrived at the airport. From the distance, you could see Camille’s family jet in the private terminal gearing up for the runway, with Ziggy and Trent standing on one side, while Camille was standing on the opposite side, wearing a sundress that showed off her growing bump while she waved toward you enthusiastically. 

“Camilleee!” you squealed, running over to her to give her a hug. “Oh my days, you’re actually the cutest pregnant person ever for someone who swore up and down they were never having kids. You look gorgeous girl!”

“You next” Camille teased while hugging you back, but then she pulled away with a gasp, pressing her hand into her belly. “Oh! She’s kicking me. See? She agrees with me...she wants someone to play with when she’s out of here.”

You laughed, shaking your head no while waving your hand around. “Umm.. I think I’ll take a rain check on that for now.” You looked around, watching as Jude brought luggage to the jet. You glanced at Camille, then at Trent and the twins who weren’t offering any type of answer or explanation for why everyone was at the airport. “Seriously..what’s going on? I feel like everyone knows except for me..”

Ziggy, Trent, and Jude exchanged some looks while dapping each other up, covering their mouth with their hands while they talked in low voices you couldn’t hear. You looked back at Camille and Ezzie, waiting for some sort of an answer but both of them just grinned, gesturing for you to hop on the plane. Ziggy stood next to Trent, slapping a hand on his shoulder. “Good luck, bro.”

Jude chimed in, throwing in wise words for one of his best mates. “Don’t fuck up and trip over your words. Just say it from the heart, that’s better than trying to memorize any speech.” 

After a few more words of encouragement from Jude, Trent walked up the steps, sitting next to you with a huge, but very nervous grin plastered across his face. You looked at him as the jet’s engines came to life, jetting down the runway to carry you off to the little town of Lahaina, meaning ‘cruel or merciless sun’ in Hawaiian, because no matter the weather, the sun would always find a way to shine there.

“Where are we going?” you asked Trent as the jet climbed higher into the sky.

“Anywhere” he replied simply, kissing your temple.

The private flight from England to Hawaii consisted of roughly 15 hours of watching the clouds in the sky until everything became endlessly blue beneath the plane. At some point, exhaustion took over and you drifted in and out of sleep against Trent’s shoulder. By the time the plane began its descent, you were so disoriented you didn’t know if it was morning or evening when Trent finally woke you up. You stepped out of the plane and into the warm Hawaiian breeze. The air felt sweet, carrying notes of saltwater and blooming plumeria and hibiscus flowers. The sun was beaming down, warming your skin in seconds as it casted it’s rays of sunshine over the island. Trent held your hand, leading you to the car as you took in the way the Hawaiian sun made his skin glow golden.

“T...why are we in Hawaii right now?” you asked while stepping into the car. “You didn’t tell me we were going on holiday again! Please, pleaseee tell me you didn’t pack my suitcase?? Oh my god...no.”

Trent laughed, hopping into the driver’s seat while starting the car. “Nah, that was all Ezzie and Camille.”

You breathed a sigh of relief, clutching your heart as he started the drive. You flipped between different radio stations until you found one playing a song called Saltwater Sweetness by Kolohe Kai, which seemed to fit the mood of the Pacific stretching out, sparkling underneath the sunlight on one side of the island while surfers held surfboards while running to the ocean. There were cars pulled off the road at random, passengers either chasing swells or snapping pictures of the scenery. Elevated greenery and low hanging clouds clinging to the mountains were on the other side of the island, painting a beautiful picture just below the blue sky. Banyan trees lined the streets for patches of shade over the roads as you took in the sacredness of the land. “This is breathtaking. It’s so pretty here.” you sighed in amazement, rolling your window down to let the wind breeze through the car.

Trent glanced at you quickly, mainly trying to keep his eyes on the road because there was nothing to save you if he happened to get distracted. “Wait until you see where we’re staying.”

As you drove from the north side of the island to the west, you pulled over at a local roadside stand from the smells of fresh banana bread wafting through the window. You followed Trent hand in hand to meet an older woman behind the stand who had dark hair that was beginning to silver.

“Aloha!” She greeted you with a warm, welcoming smile.

“Aloha,” you shyly replied, glancing at the loaves neatly wrapped in rows on display. “This smells so amazing, we had to stop for some.”

“Mahalo (thank you)” the woman gave you another smile, more weary this time. “Been selling here for years. It helps keep me busy.”

Trent picked up one of the loaves, juggling it in his hands, genuinely curious. “You make all of this yourself?”

“Every batch” she nodded proudly. “I used to sell from my house but the Lahaina fires took my house with it. So now I’m here as long as I can be.”

“I’m sorry to hear that..” Trent replied apologetically.

Your heart fell to your stomach. You knew exactly what that felt like. You caught a QR code taped to the side of the stand but then your eyes drifted to a teenage girl off to the side, behind the stand watching over two younger kids while they kicked a ball around. The girl looked up at you and gave you a faint smile with heavy eyes. You eyed the QR code again, nudging Trent gently to catch his attention too. Once he noticed, he pulled out his phone without another word and scanned the code, entering a large sum. He turned the screen toward the woman and her hand flew to her chest when she read the number he entered.

“Ke Akua pu (bless), thank you,” she whispered in a trembling voice. “You didn’t have to–”

“It’s nothing,” Trent interrupted in sincerity, but also with a cheeky wink. “Just paying for our banana bread. I bet it tastes as good as it smells. Thank you for this.”

“Better” she replied more steadier. “Aloha ‘oe (bye, much love to you). Be safe and remember to leave nothing but your footprints! Respect the āina (land)”

You and Trent headed back to the car, fighting for pieces of banana bread that tasted even more amazing than the smell of it, which was already hard to beat. When you finally arrived at the hotel, you were beyond tired. You dragged to your suite with tired footsteps, smelling the faint scent of plumeria in the air. When Trent opened the door you wanted to plop down on the bed immediately, but you walked over to peer out the windowed door of the large balcony, catching glimpses of the outdoor lobby below that had a lush gardens, oasis pools, koi ponds, flamingos, and was steps away from a breathtaking beach.

“Do you want to check out the beach?" Trent asked, pulling his shirt over his head.

You glanced at your phone to check the time and groaned. “It’s nearly three in the morning back home. I’m so tired, T. Bed now..beach tomorrow.”

After freshening up, you both flopped onto the huge bed, falling asleep before the sun set. The next morning was spent at the beach after a short walk and you saw a local vendor selling Hawaiian shave ice. You ordered a pineapple, coconut and banana shave ice, insisting it had to be the best one, but you forgot how strong banana flavored things could be. Trent went for a passionfruit, orange, mango, and guava flavored shave ice. You took your spoon and tried to steal some of Trent’s but he pushed his shave ice away protectively.

“What are you doing?” he laughed, turning away from you when you attempted to steal some again. “Baby, you have your own!”

“But yours looks better,” you whined, leaning over to sneak some onto your spoon anyway. He shook his head, switching his flavor for yours because he knew once you tasted it you’d end up eating the rest of his anyway.

You spent most of the day relaxing until a big family loudly disrupted the normal sounds of the beach. You nudged Trent and pointed further down the beach at a family in all white matching outfits. The mum had a large vlogging camera in her hand, yelling at her kids to look natural while they posed for what was supposed to be an ‘unstaged’ video clip.

“Where do you think they’re from?” you asked, giggling at the mum’s attempts to wrangle five kids into one video shot.

“California. Gotta be” Trent answered without a doubt in his mind. “Those are influencers.”

You watched attentively as one of their kids stomped away from the mum after she yelled at him for not smiling enough. “No, that’s definitely Utah. Matching outfits, exactly five kids, everyone’s blonde, and they’re rich. Those are Mormon vloggers on holiday.”

Trent raised his sunglasses and tilted his head to look at you, squinting from the sunlight. “Yeah? What do you think their channel name is?”

You laughed and thought for a second. “Probably something really corny like LuckySevenFam”

The longer you people watched, the crazier the family became. You watched them litter the beach with random snack rubbish, try to touch baby sea turtles, and one of their many kids complained they were bored despite being in literal paradise. Once the mum finally got everyone in line for the picture, a rogue wave splashed onto their blinding white outfits making the kids scream, the dad shook his head, and the mum was fuming from her perfect shot being ruined. You turned to Trent with a look of disgust on your face as you continued eating the shave ice he traded with you. “Please tell me we’ll never turn into whatever that is.”

Trent tilted your head towards him with his hand and leaned in to kiss you. “Never.” When you finished the shave ice, you and Trent got up to throw it in the bin, picking up the family’s leftover snack rubbish in an effort to leave nothing but footprints behind. After finally leaving the beach for the day, you and Trent headed back to the hotel to get ready to catch the sun set on Mount Haleakala. While Trent was in the bathroom, he discreetly pulled out Serendipité and sprayed it on his pulse points before putting it back in its place in the box. When he came back out, you smelled it immediately and thought for a second, trying to figure out why it smelled familiar even though you never smelled it until now.

“T..what are you wearing?” you asked while spraying a perfume from one of Camille’s collections that she packed for you. “That doesn’t smell like Rêveur or anything I’ve made.”

Trent fidgeted around with a bag to hide the box, then he looked up and smirked at you. “Guess.”

“I don’t know..”

“Your guess is as good as mine then. I don’t know either.” he replied, taking your hand and heading out the door. That irritated you immediately and you rolled your eyes, annoyed while heading out.

The drive up Haleakala felt like a dream being painted in motion. The sky that was once vibrantly blue, shifted into soft pastels. Streaks of lavender and orange painted across the horizon with chunks of white clouds blending into the scene. The higher you drove up, the cooler the air got as the towns of Maui disappeared into the pillowy clouds that were now sitting below the car now that you were nearing the top. Trent’s hands tapped chaotically against the steering wheel and he was quiet and fidgety. Every now and then he would glance at you and smile. You figured maybe jet lag or the altitude was messing with his nerves, or maybe the winding roads leaving no room for any distractions. For a second you thought to yourself:

Wouldn’t it be funny if he proposed here?

But the thought quickly erased from your mind when you noticed how quiet Trent was.

“What are you thinking about?” You finally asked, turning to him. “You’re acting so strange.”

Trent’s fingers stopped tapping the wheel and he laughed, still keeping his eyes on the road. “Baby we’re one wrong move from falling off this volcano. I’m just concentrating on the drive.”

You crossed your arms, unhappy with his answer as you looked out the window at the landscape. Trent knew you were irritated with him and spoke up again, “I’ll tell you soon, Y/N. Just wait.”

“Wait for what?” you pushed with attitude, but his focus went back to the road and the conversation ended there. When you finally arrived at the top and stepped out of the car, the view took your breath away. The sky transformed to a vibrant orange color melting into deep shades of pink, blue, and violet. The doughy clouds stretched below and seemed close enough to touch and in that moment it was just you, Trent, and heaven on earth.

“I’ll never be able to describe this in words. It’s so beautiful up here” you whispered, barely audible from being so awe stricken at the view displayed and ever changing in front of you.

“Yeah. It is.” Trent spoke just as softly, but he wasn’t looking at the view at all – he was looking at you. He reached into a bag and pulled out an engraved box. The second you saw it you eyed him with a curious brow. 

“What’s this?” you asked, running your nude colored nails over the box when he handed it to you.

“Open it” he urged, stepping closer to you. “That should answer all your questions so I can finally ask mine.” You unclasped the magnet top from the box and recognized the two fragrances you cherished so much, but then you saw a third you didn’t recognize. The name Serendipité was scripted across the custom label and you pulled it out to bring it to your nose. The scent smelled exactly how you felt with Trent at this moment. Like a beaming sun in the heavens of earth with an ever changing backdrop.

“Trent..is this...?” you trailed off, unable to form words from the beautifully overwhelming view and such an intentional, loving gesture from your soon to be fiancé.

“I finished it,” he answered quietly. “You said you wanted it to feel like us..so I finished it. I wanted it to be perfect for you baby.”

Tears began spilling from your face and you shook your head, way too overwhelmed but very much in love. “It’s perfect, T. It smells just like–”

“Us.” he finished for you, stepping closer.

You were still holding onto the bottle, trying to process everything when you noticed him shift. Trent’s eyes reflected the sky through his pupils and by the time you snapped out of it, he dropped to one knee. You rolled your eyes in disbelief. “T..no. Get up. This isn’t funny anymore and it’s getting old.”

He laughed and took your hand in his. “Baby I can’t get up this time.”

“Wh-what?” you stuttered, glancing around but there was no one else in the area besides the two of you, the sun setting, and the moon peeking slowly over a cloud.

Ohmygod.

Trent took a deep breath and then began speaking. “From the day I met you, I knew you were something special and worth getting to know more. I’ll never regret sitting next to you that day. You changed my whole world, you made me realize things about myself I never thought possible. Every day I get to wake up and see your beautiful face is a day I’ll never take for granted ever again. You mean the world to me, YN. The time I spent away from you was the lowest I ever felt, and still somehow the universe led me right back to you. I never feel like I have enough time with you, but I want eternity with you. I bought this ring the same day you sent it to me because I knew I never wanted to spend my life with anyone else but you forever, and even after. Will you marry me, Y/N?”

When you saw him holding the ring in his hand you gasped, covering your mouth with your free hand as your other hand began shaking in his hand from excitement and pure adrenaline.

“Yes. Oui. Si. Ja.......How many more do I have to say before you put the ring on me?” you sniffled, impatiently waiting for him to slide it on your finger. Trent’s hands shook when he pulled the ring out to slide it onto your ring finger. He stood up, pulling you into his arms as you buried your face into his neck while still crying. He kissed your temple, your lips, and anywhere else he could reach.

“I love you, Y/N” he whispered against your skin.

“I love you too. I can’t wait to spend forever with you.” you replied with a kiss on his lips, both of you turning to watch the sky go from pastels to a twinkling night sky bathed in the moon’s bright light.

Later that night after a celebratory dinner, you and Trent walked back to the hotel room, but every few steps he would stop just to pull you close to him and kiss your neck, your shoulder and whisper ‘I love you’ in your ear.

“I can’t wait to get back to the room” he whispered into your ear in lust filled anticipation. His hand moved to your waist, squeezing the side of your hip. “You have no idea what calling you my fianceé is doing to me right now.”

You bit your lip, feeling butterflies swoon around in your stomach as his fingers continued to brush against the fabric of your dress.

“T..” you whispered when he nipped against your jaw. “We’re in the middle of the lobby.”

“So?” He gave you a cheeky grin, looking around but it was late and mostly everyone had returned to their rooms by now. “No one’s here. And you look way too beautiful right now."

You giggled, “Baby, I’m sure they have cameras. Calm d–” Trent silenced you with a kiss, entering the lift and walking you in backwards. Once he pressed the floor button, the ride up to the suite became almost unbearable from Trent sliding his hands down your back to your ass while continuing to kiss your shoulder and neck. When the door opened, he grabbed your hand and walked quickly to your suite, fumbling with his wristband fob to open the door. The second he got it open, he led you in and spun you around, bringing his lips to yours again as he walked you backward toward the bed. “I want to taste you,” he whispered against your lips while pulling down the straps of your dress to reveal your sun kissed skin. He removed your dress in a rush before removing his own clothes and laid on the bed, pulling you on top of him with a flip over so that you were straddling his chest from behind. You looked back at him from over your shoulder, smiling while biting down on your lip.

“You’re not shy,” he teased in a rough voice. “C’mere and sit, baby. I want all of you.”

You slowly lowered yourself on him but he had no patience and gripped your waist to pull you down to meet his tongue. Trent hungrily slurped over your pussy, jetting his tongue out to flick against your clit in a steady motion. Your head fell down while you slowly stroked his shaft up and down, feeling him stiffen against your palm. You peppered soft kisses on the tip of his dick and then wrapped your mouth around him, making him groan and thrust up a little.

“Fuck. Keep doing that.” he groaned against your skin before going back to lapping at you like he couldn’t get enough of the taste of you. You tried to push the intense feeling aside and focus on the way he twitched every time you massaged his balls while adding suctioned pressure on his cock. Both of you were battling to see who could make the other crash over the edge first, so you increased the suction and took him further in your mouth with tears obstructing your vision from your gag reflex as your head bobbed up and down. You moaned against his dick to drive him crazy and Trent’s hands gripped your thighs tighter while his tongue moved against your clit until you couldn’t think straight anymore. You thought you were winning when he let out a familiar sound that meant he was close, but he shifted gears and started fingering you while he attacked your clit. 

“Don’t stop, right there” you gasped, losing your rhythm as pleasure took over your body. Your hips rocked against his face needily, your moans loud. “T-Trent.. I’m – fuck, I’m–”

“Let me taste it, baby” he commanded, muffled against your skin while still lapping you up. “Cum for me.”

A cry tore through your throat as your body shook against him. You clenched your thighs around his head while he held you down with one hand, and raked his hands over your back to soothe you as you came down from your orgasm with the other hand. You had no time to recover before he flipped you back over to face him and gripped you to lift you up and position you above his cock so you could sink down on it.

“Stay on top for me?" he cooed while running his hands down your thighs to make you shiver. “I want to watch you.” You nodded and shifted to bend your knees on either side of him, bracing yourself against his chest as you bounced on top of him, filling the room with moans, gasps, and wet squelches. Trent’s hands ran up your body, trailing over your nipples and pinching them enough to make you whimper.

“So damn beautiful” he affirmed, never taking his eyes off you. “Look at my fianceé taking me so well. You feel so good baby... keep going.”

Your legs started to shake from the burn you were feeling from trying to keep up the pace. “T…I can’t.”

“Nah, keep going. I’ll help you.” Trent gripped your hips and lifted you up to thrust up into you, making you scratch at his chest from the deep strokes. When he sensed you were too tired to keep going, he pulled you to the edge of the bed and shifted your legs to the side, hiking one knee up to your chest for a fun angle. 

“Fuck” you moaned with a jaw drop when he slid into you. The snug fit paired with the depth was almost too much to bear, making you whine his name. He grinned and leaned down to kiss you before pulling back and increasing his pace. “You like the way I fuck you?” he asked, giving you deep strokes paired with nipple play.

“Yesss,” you gasped, gripping his forearms while your body arched up to him. “You fuck me so good, T.”

“You’re so pretty like this” he locked his eyes on yours, licking his lips. “All mine. Just like this. I’m gonna make you feel like this whenever you need it, beautiful.” You squeezed his dick with your muscles from his words and his face twisted in pleasure with a clenched jaw, heavy breathing, and concentration in his brows. Watching him lose himself inside you made you wetter as he thrusted harder.

“Babyyy” you moaned while dragging out the word in an attempt to warn him you were about to orgasm.

“I know,” he groaned, leaning down to kiss you again. He pulled at your bottom lip before sliding his tongue inside your mouth, breathing and groaning between kisses as he filled you up with white ropes of cum. The warm filling made you feel full and tipped you over, causing your pussy to squeeze his cock with a strong grip but he didn’t stop moving and continued to roll his hips up against yours until you were both thoroughly satisfied. You grinned into another kiss when he whispered “I love you” against your lips, eventually echoing the love back – full of emotion.

“I can’t wait to spend the rest of my life with you, T.”

The days spent in Hawaii after the engagement blurred into a montage of sun soaked heaven: lazy mornings spent walking the beach to catch the sun rise, hiking trails that twisted through the lush greenery of the island, the sticky sweetness of Hawaiian malasada donuts on your fingers, sipping mai tais with sand still clinging to your toes at a beach bar, helicopter rides to get a view of the whole island, and sunset sails while watching cliff divers leap from Black Rock at Ka’anapali Beach as a treasured nightly island ritual. Your time there floated through like a dream and before you knew it, you were back in England.

One night, you heard the patter of rain against the window while you and Trent laid in bed. He was cuddled up against your stomach with his eyes closed as you massaged circles into his scalp, making him hum.

“You okay?” you asked in a soft voice under the dim lighting.

“Head’s still banging” he spoke low, wincing from his exhaustion and dull aches. “This feels good though. Thank you, baby. I might just fall asleep right here.”

You smiled and leaned forward to place a kiss on top of his head. Your gaze drifted over to the bedside table where the photobook he created for your first anniversary lay. It was slightly worn on the spine from being opened and closed so much. You reached over to pick it up carefully, flipping through the pages while keeping one hand on Trent’s head to keep massaging it. You flipped through until you reached the photo of Ziggy and Trent smiling brightly in front of the camera while you and Ezzie were in the background, playing with daisy crowns. You shook your head, laughing softly.

“What’s funny?” Trent mumbled against your pajama top.

“Nothing” you answered quietly, turning the book slightly so he could see the picture you were looking at. “I just can’t believe you’ve been here this whole time and we never realized it until years later. It’s mad.” Trent cracked one eye open, glancing at the picture with a sleepy grin.

“Yeah? Would you have given me a chance when we were kids?” he asked, curiously.

“Mmm..I don’t know. Something about seeing you at the park used to annoy me…still does actually, but I can live with it now.”

Trent laughed, wincing a little from his headache. “Baby, that’s fucked up. I thought you were cute but Ziggy would never tell me anything about you. You were kind of weird though so maybe I wouldn’t give you a chance either.”

You giggled, flicking the back of his head with your thumb and index finger. “Careful. I’ll make this headache worse than it already is.”

“You give me enough of them already with the wedding planning” he bantered, shifting around to make himself more comfortable. “You’re lucky I love you.” His words trailed off as he fell asleep, and you continued to flip through the pages. Eventually you closed the book and placed it back on the bedside table. You lifted your left hand up to catch the sparkle of the diamond against the dim lighting. 

None of this was luck.

It was serendipity – a chance encounter that turned into forever and after.

[serverusslaype]

Shameless, pt. 12

Severus Snape x professor!reader fic

Shameless Masterpost

hello fellow snape lovers, i have returned with another long part. i hope you are ready. <3 and i hope it lives up to your expectations.

all of your replies to my question about snape's patronus was really interesting! the majority thought it was either a raven, a bat or a falcon. a raven/falcon is quite fitting for him, i do agree. :) but the bat is just too cute tbh. 🥹 🦇

i just want to say hello to anyone new that has found this fic, you are very welcome here!! thank you for taking a chance on this! and thank you to the people who have been here since the beginning! :) appreciate you all so much. you're all way too kind. honestly. thank you <3

okay, so without further ado, let's get on with this!

okayyy lets go!

this song is best played when we look through Minerva McGonagall's perspective at dinner. :) or, you can listen to it throughout the whole fic or not at all it's up to you <3

Your mind was abuzz with the fresh memory of Severus's hands all over your body as you tiptoed back to your quarters at almost one o'clock in the morning, a giddy smile slipping onto your lips. You had to utilise every remaining ounce of strength within you to hold yourself back from skipping back to your room - the happiness that was bubbling inside of you was nothing like you'd ever felt before.

As you rounded the corner, a light was pooling out from beneath your door, and your body suddenly felt unbearably cold. You stopped in your tracks and the happy smile on your face disappeared within seconds. Ben must have woken up.

Swallowing, you padded forwards and adjusted your nightdress with nervous fingers to assure everything looked normal - or at least not like you'd just been ravished by none other than Severus Snape. A chill shivered over your body as his name lingered in your mind, tickling every inch of your skin. You had to force yourself to push him out of your brain for now, otherwise you were going to go insane. Reaching the door, your hand settled itself on the handle, but it wasn't opening it. You knew why - you were about to see Ben and lie to his face about where you'd been, pretending like you weren't just moaning the name of a man he hated with such a fiery passion.

There was that tingle between your legs again.

Before you were able to twist the knob of the door, it was pulled open, revealing the tired, worried face of the man you were supposedly dating. Your face instantly went as red as a tomato.

"Y/N? Where the hell did you go? Jesus- I've been so worried about you," Ben sighed heavily, his hand flying to your wrist to grasp it, a little too tightly. "You're insane to go wandering about at this time of night when Black is still at large!" His voice grew louder, piercing your ears. You winced slightly at the noise, shrinking.

"I'm sorry, I couldn't sleep, I just needed to..." you trailed off, panicking for a moment, "walk."

"You should have woken me, I would've come with you." He said, widened eyes staring uncomfortably into yours. You started to feel a little bad about worrying him so much. His eyes seemed so tired, how long had he been awake for?

"I'm sorry," you repeated, tugging your wrist from him, "I'll wake you next time." You sighed quietly as Ben didn't let go of your wrist. "Ben, c'mon, I'm tired." His eyes trailed down to your bloodied finger as he raised your wrist up to his face.

"What happened to your finger?" He questioned, his tone low. The moisture in your mouth had suddenly vanished as your eyes flicked to his narrowed ones, your heart beginning to pick up in pace.

"I took a shortcut through some rose bushes," You lied. Almost immediately, the ripped hem of your nightdress came to mind. Shit, you totally forgot to fix that. "I even ripped the hem of my nightdress." You pouted, pointing at the damaged part of your clothing.

"No other way around it?" Ben laughed, his lips curling upwards. You weren't sure whether it was the paranoia kicking in or what, but to you, his laugh sounded like he didn't believe you.

"No, it would've taken me an extra five minutes or so." You said quietly, staring.

"That's funny," he shrugged, dropping your hand carelessly, "I don't remember there being any rose bushes at Hogwarts." His tone was accusatory, sharp, and cold. Your jaw stiffened.

"What, so you can remember every plant grown on the grounds here but you couldn't remember anything in Herbology class all those years ago?" You laughed back, your brows furrowing as you stared up at him.

He doesn't know, he can't... right? Gods, you really didn't have the energy for this if he did know. There was no way in hell you could handle an argument right now. Suddenly the idea of paying Severus a visit in the middle of the night was a terrible one. It's not like you were expecting to sleep with him, you just wanted to talk, however, one thing just led to another...

"Well..." He hummed, clearly caught up in your words. You were a little relieved, but you weren't out of the woodworks yet.

"I don't know if it was a rose bush or not, I just know it had thorns- ...it was too dark to see, really." You added with a soft tone, hoping it'd settle his racing mind.

"Alright." Ben sighed, evidently letting it go. You held back a sigh of relief, and instead smiled. "I'm just glad you're okay. My mind was conjuring up all sorts of... horrible things." He said, pulling you into a tight hug. You hugged him back, glad he didn't kiss you. The only lips you wanted on top of yours weren't his. "You won't be leaving my sight from now on."

"What?" You choked out, pulling away from him and placing a firm hand on his chest to push him back. Ben wrapped his fingers around your wrist again, pulling you into him.

"I have to keep you safe, Y/N." Ben frowned at you, confused at your sudden change of heart. Little did he know, your heart never changed, it had always been with someone else. You struggled with his tightening grip, wincing slightly as his fingers pinched you. You weren't exactly sure what to say in response, and so you stood there, dumbfounded and speechless. "I can't let Black hurt you."

"Dumbledore said he left. I'll be fine." You tried to persuade him into changing his mind, however he was persistent.

"I don't care what Dumbledore said." He snapped, a flicker of anger flashing across his eyes. You reeled back slightly, a little frightened from his outburst. "Now, let's go to bed, you said you were tired."

Speechless, you nodded, not wanting to push him further, you weren't exactly sure how he'd react. Maybe he was just overly tired. You hoped you'd only have to deal with this for a few more days, the way he was treating you was lower than low - he never acted like this back in school, the most he'd do was insult you playfully, but that was it. He only every caused mischief. Perhaps this Ministry job had gotten to his head...

"Sir," a shaky voice came from beside Snape, "I forgot the, erm, the..." The student trailed off, his voice suddenly retreating back inside his throat.

"Yes, Mr Harlem, spit it out..." Snape drawled, his eyes glued to the wall. Teaching a class of seventh-years was easier said than done - they were on the cusp of adulthood, and so navigating their hormonal and volatile attitudes was frustrating enough for the Potions Master.

"I forgot to get the a-asphodel root." Barnaby Harlem uttered, his body almost trembling from fear. An irritated huff fell from Snape. He thought incompetency had outgrown them, clearly, he was very wrong.

"How helpful, and," Professor Snape said flatly, turning to face the boy, "what a promising show of what's to come in your future, Mr Harlem." He finished with a scowl. "You are in your final year and yet, you are negligent enough to let a simple ingredient slip your little mind?"

"Well, it-"

"Silence," Snape huffed again, "I will go and retrieve it, I do not trust you to not go running off somewhere..." Honestly, it was just an excuse to go and see you. Harlem shrunk in his seat as the rest of the class tried to hide their amused faces behind their hands. Snape rolled his eyes at them, dramatically sweeping towards the door. "I expect half a parchment's worth of writing when I get back. Use what's left of your brains to turn to page one-hundred-and-forty-two and explain the other uses of the Draught of Living Death... in detail." Snape demanded, earning a deflated chorus of groans from the class.

"Mr Robinson, thirty points from Gryffindor for being such a whiny little rodent." Was the last thing Snape said as he left the room and made his journey to your greenhouses. Perhaps that was a little harsh, but that boy had been irritating him all morning.

Severus wasn't sure if you were going to be at your greenhouse, but it'd be a pleasant surprise if you were. If you weren't, he'd just leave a note, like you'd requested all that time ago.

Your heart almost fell out of your mouth as you caught sight of a tall, black figure stood patiently at your glass door. You were in the middle of teaching a class, with Ben sat at the back no less, observing, acting like your personal bodyguard. You had tried to persuade him- no, you tried to tell him that he didn't need to watch you teach, but the man was undoubtedly stubborn.

'It'll be fun to watch you work, anyway,' he'd said with a smug smile, brushing past you towards your greenhouse.

Your breath caught in your throat as you stared at him, panicking slightly. Did he really think it wise to visit you at such a time? The thrum in your chest began to speed up, blood rushing to your cheeks to paint them a gorgeous shade of scarlet. You quickly shook your head to entice your hair to fall forwards and act like a curtain to hide your blushing cheeks.

"Oh, Professor Snape, to what, erm, to what do I owe the pleasure?" You stumbled over your words slightly, coughing quietly - a pathetic attempt to hide your faltering voice. The corner of Severus's lip twitched slightly, thoroughly enjoying your flustered reaction. He absolutely adored how red your cheeks had become, in fact, he found himself thinking back to last night when he had you looking a similar way when his hands were caressing your smooth, delicious skin.

"Another student of mine forgot a rather significant ingredient for their potion, hence my presence, Professor L/N." Snape's cold tone had returned, nipping at you. The whole class had gone silent, either dumbstruck that the Potions Master was stood in their class, or the fact that there was a strange tension between the two of you.

"Oh, right," you stumbled again, "what do you need?"

"Asphodel root." He replied, casting a cold glance at your class as the eerie sensation of being watched crept up his spine. Instantly, they looked away, eyes wide and heads down.

"Brewing the Draught of Living Death again?" You made small talk, your voice returning to it's normal octave as you stood awkwardly.

"Indeed," He drawled boredly, his eyes catching sight of Ben sat in the back of your classroom, surrounded by big, green leafy plants. Snape kept his poker face on, and ignored the boy who was currently shooting daggers at him through his beady little eyes. He looked back to you. "Where might I find it?"

"Erm, beside... Mr Bluewater, just in those wooden cupboards." You replied, your voice quietening as you nodded towards Ben. A deep, frustrated sigh fell from Snape as he blinked slowly at you, evidently annoyed with the fact he had to go near Ben, let alone possibly talk to him. How was he acting so suavely? And you were this bumbling, stumbling mess?

Without another word, Snape sweeped to the back of the class to where Ben was sat, ignoring him. He didn't even utter a word to him as he bent down to open the doors, rummaging through it. That was until Ben decided to speak.

"You know, it's common courtesy to acknowledge someone," Ben muttered as you continued teaching the class, his eyes glued to you. Snape rose to his feet with the jar of asphodel root in hand. "But, I suppose someone like you lacks that certain aspect." He finished with a sour face.

"I prefer to acknowledge people who are of importance," Snape said flatly, towering over the boy, "and you, Mr Bluewater, regrettably do not fit those requirements." His tone was sharp and clipped, clearly not enjoying this interaction.

"You should watch your mouth, Snape." Ben warned, his eyes darting to Snape and narrowing into a weak glare. Snape's face remained unchanged and uneffected.

"Why? Would you dare assault a member of staff?" Snape taunted, suddenly realising that his presence was irking Ben more than usual. He couldn't miss this perfect opportunity.

"I might just." Ben replied swiftly. This was laughable, of course he wouldn't do that, Snape knew he wasn't stupid.

"The Ministry wouldn't be so forgiving if they heard you committed such a thing," Snape replied and linked his hands behind his back, his black cloak flowing over his arms, "in fact, I believe you'd lose your precious job."

"It'd be worth it." Ben hissed.

"Would it?" Snape tutted, his tone sarcastic and mocking, only infuriating Ben more.

"I'm the best at my job. They wouldn't fire me, they need me." Ben snapped, his irritation reaching a new level as he quarrelled with Snape.

"Is that why they've allowed you to be off-site, lingering around here at Hogwarts like a lost fly? Because you're so needed?" Snape smirked, relishing Ben's frustration. "I highly doubt they'd think well of you for abandoning your work to keep a concerningly close eye on your..." Snape's lips twitched into a grim, flat line, visibly struggling to say the next word. "...lady-friend." Ben's eyes narrowed at Snape, observing how he had trouble talking about you in such a way.

The boy stayed silent. He had nothing to reply back with - Snape had called his bluff, and he knew it. Meanwhile, as you were teaching, you'd been keeping an eye on the two men at the back of your class, quietly squabbling. Though, your eyes tended to linger on only one of them.

Snape spun on his heel, leaving Ben to boil in his anger. A smug smirk quickly crossed the Potion Master's face as he noticed your eyes stuck to him like a magnet. You rolled them and folded your arms against your chest as wiggled your jaw at him, clearly unhappy with how pleased he looked. He walked towards you, jar of asphodel root in hand and that same smirk still on his lips. You sucked in a sharp breath as he neared you, your heart entering that familiar fast pace everytime you were less than a metre away from him.

You could feel Ben's eyes burning into the pair of you, the overflowing jealousy and hate prickling your skin like a thousand needles.

"Thank you, Y/N." Severus said, his face dropping back into it's usual bored expression. 

Ben was truly starting to despise how Snape looked at you, and how he acted towards you. He'd noticed how Snape wouldn't insult you nor try to tear you down, since that's usually his first choice when talking to someone - unless he respected them. You'd been here just over two years, and you were also one of his old students, so why and how had you gained his respect so quickly? It's not like you had any incredible achievements or skills that he could possibly fawn over. The thought pecked annoyingly at Ben's brain as he watched the two of you exchange words.

You cleared your throat, unfolding your arms and clasping your hands together in front of your hips. "It's my pleasure, Severus." You smiled politely at him, his eyes lingering on yours for a little too long. You swallowed, becoming flustered again, so you glanced away, your eyes catching sight of how Ben was almost exploding with rage.

Severus swept past you, purposefully brushing the edge of his arm against your shoulder, sending your mind into a clouded haze.

You had to fight with all of your might to compose yourself as a whole class of curious, prying eyes stared at you. It had almost slipped your mind that you were in the middle of teaching. You glanced over at Ben, whose fierce eyes were still trailing after Snape, even after he had left.

"Sorry for the interruption," you smiled at the children, sighing deeply, "so, dittany. Can anyone tell me the properties and uses of it?" There was several seconds of silence before a young brunette boy raised his hand hesitantly, clearly nervous. "Yes, Mr Thomas?"

"Erm," he swallowed, glancing around at his peers who were now staring at him expectantly, "i-it, well- dittany is very useful for healing." Almost immediately, he reminded you of Neville Longbottom.

A smile spread across your face as you nodded at the boy. "Yes, very good," you said, "and what can you use it for?"

"Um, potion-making," He stuttered for a moment, his face going red as you put him on the spot. "It can also be used in wand cores I think, and most importantly, healing magic?" Thomas answered you, his voice shooting up an octave as he finished his sentence.

"Yes, well done! Ten points to Hufflepuff!" You cheered with a wide grin, a swell of pride blooming in your chest. It was difficult not to be biased towards your own house... With a brief spin, you turned around to grab a stem of dittany that you had set aside for the lesson and twirled back around to the class to hold it up for them all to see. "This is the herb that we've been talking about. It's quite common-looking, although, you can easily identify it by carefully looking at it's small, round leaves." You explained, handing it to a student to look at. "Pass it around, have a look, and then we can begin talking about where to harvest it and how to care for it."

Before you knew it, the school day was over, and the clock was almost striking six o'clock in the evening. Ben had been smothering you all day, and you couldn't wait to escape him for a while to have dinner with your other bearable colleagues. Despite your irritation with him, you knew he was just doing it out of the good of his own heart - or so you thought, but it was becoming a little too much for you. It's not like you needed twenty-four-seven babysitting.

"I'm going to head down for dinner, will you be alright up here?" You asked Ben as you fixed your hair into a messy half-up-half-down style, pulling a few strands out at the top of your head to frame your face.

"You look pretty." Ben commented as he was sat back on your sofa, a book in hand. You turned around to face him slowly, a small smile gracing your lips.

"Thank you," You lifted a hand to smooth out your dress, rubbing off a bit of dust that had been sitting on it. "You have good taste, I suppose." You shrugged, your forced smile widening a bit as he relaxed into his normal self. Ben had bought you a deep red, floor length dress with a square neckline. The trumpet sleeves reached your wrists, drooping a little at the ends. You weren't the biggest fan of it, but you couldn't exactly say you hated a gift that he'd given you.

"That I do." Ben nodded smugly, standing up from the sofa to walk over to you in a slow manner. Ah, no you don't, you thought. You swallowed and arched an eyebrow, eyeing him cautiously. "You look great in my house colours." A smirk tickled his lips. You couldn't help but disagree with him, you thought you looked much better in yellow, and perhaps, another certain colour.

"Ben," you warned, holding out a flat palm, "I don't want to be late to dinner. And, I really don't want to ruin this dress."

"I can easily replace it." He shrugged, snaking his hands around your waist. Quickly, your hands flew to his to remove them, placing them back by his sides.

"I'm serious, Ben." You sighed, forcing a playful smile onto your lips, gazing up at him. "I'd like to keep my punctual reputation." A sour expression took hold of his features. You forgot how emotionally immature he was compared to Severus.

"Alright. But afterwards, I'm going to show you a good time." He smirked, and you had to hold back a cringe, instead opting to act like you were intrigued. Merlin, you missed how well-spoken Severus was.

"I'd love to, but I have a meeting with Professor Lupin right after. So I might be late back. Don't wait up for me." You explained, turning away from him to take another quick look in the mirror. This dress was doing you no favours. At. All.

It was a little ill-fitting, and the sleeves were drowning your hands, making it look as if you were some Wicked Witch of the West. Was Ben purposefully trying to make you look bad?

"Professor Lupin? Why?" He questioned, that curious, almost demanding tone returning. It made your skin crawl. You hoped he was going to leave soon, though you weren't sure of it. He seemed to be making himself at home here.

"He's going to be teaching me a self-defence spell." You replied nonchalantly, clasping your hands together in front of you.

"Self-defence? I can help you with that, what is it? I know almost all of them."

"I appreciate the thought, but Remus has a lot more experience in this kind of thing." You sighed, getting a little miffed with his attitude.

"Oh, right." Ben huffed, padding back over to the sofa and falling back into it with a loud thud; arms folded against his chest in a show of annoyance.

For once, you felt like yourself again as you walked down the corridors alone, heading towards the Great Hall. You gained a couple stares from students as you passed them, and you assumed it was because of your dress - it wasn't your usual taste, you usually opted for yellow, or earthy colours, and this deep red was definitely rather... out there. You didn't have a chance to say no either - Ben had made you wear it, which irked you a little. With him around, you felt like you had no say in anything.

You'd chosen the easier entrance - the little door behind the staff tables. You grew a little anxious at the thought of having to walk down that neverending hall.

As you clicked the door shut, Minerva looked in your direction, her brow arching up as she glanced at your dress, a tiny smirk gracing her lips. Your cheeks grew hot, as you noticed her smiling to herself, obviously finding amusement in your rather... different choice in clothing.

"This was Ben's choice in clothing, not mine." You grumbled, sliding past her and catching Hagrid's attention who was seated beside her like usual.

"I didn't say anything, my dear." Minerva couldn't hide her amusement any longer, a brief laugh slipped from her wrinked, mischievous lips.

"You didn't need to, your face already did," You sighed, glancing at Hagrid who's face had turned red as he stared at your outfit. "Evening, Hagrid..." Another grumble left you as you realised what kind of evening you were in for.

"Erm, evenin' Miss- I mean, Y/N." Hagrid stumbled over his words, evidently a little dumbstruck by what you were wearing. Gods, you truly wished you had a little more control, you would've just chosen a bloody bin bag over this disaster. "Lovely dress." He commented, swallowing awkwardly.

"Thanks, Hagrid." You sighed softly, a little smile picking at the corner of your lips. Hagrid was sweet but awkward, and that's something you adored about the half-giant.

Your eyes flicked away from Hagrid and settled on the shorter professor beside him, "Filius," you smiled again, a little glad that he had chosen not to comment on your dress.

"Good evening, Y/N." He returned your smile, though it seemed a little too... happy. You groaned, realising that, he too, was surprised at your dress.

"Alright, alright, get your laughs out now..." You huffed, sitting down in the empty chair which sat to the right of Dumbledore's.

"Oh, don't be silly, Y/N," Minerva frowned, although you could see another smile was begging to break out on her face again. "You look beautiful." You turned to her and made a face, huffing and puffing like an annoyed little child.

"Yeah, right, Minerva." You groaned, fiddling with the itching material.

"Do you own a mirror? Or perhaps, are you aware of what one is?" A deep voice sounded from beside you, making you jump in your seat. You whipped your head to see Severus stood with a smug face, his lips curling up into an amused smirk. "From what I can see, you do not."

"This," you gestured to your dress with frustrated hands, "wasn't my choice, it was Ben's..." You grumbled once more, turning away from him with folded arms, clearly bothered by his comment. Severus took the empty seat beside you, unable to contain his amusement.

"This might be the only time that I find Bluewater entertaining." Severus said, leaning back in his chair.

"Shut up."

"Perhaps I'd listen to you if you weren't dressed like the villain of a fairytale." Severus quipped, a low chuckle rumbling in his chest. You hated how your cheeks instantly warmed at the sound. "Where on Earth did he find such a... revolting garment? The colour alone is ghastly."

"I dunno." You sunk into your chair, folding your arms against your chest, evidently rather miffed with the teasing. Severus couldn't help himself, you looked so cute when you were annoyed.

"I wouldn't put it past him for knowing all the worst clothing shops." Severus sneered, taking another reluctant glance at your outfit. You groaned again, placing your head in your hands regrettably. Suddenly, a hot, ticklish sensation bristled against your neck and it made your hairs stand on end, "I must say," he whispered into your ear, "you look much prettier in green." Your breath hitched, and you nudged his knee with your own, silently chastising his risky action.

"Of course you'd think that." You whispered back, blushing. As he leant away, a tiny hint of a smile teased your lips.

"Obviously." Severus smirked, keeping his eyes glued in front of him.

There was several seconds of silence before you chose to talk, your curiosity getting the better of you as you thought back to the interaction between Ben and Severus during your lesson. "What were you and Ben talking about at the back of my class earlier today?"

"Bluewater's arrogance got the best of him." Severus simply said, his brow twitching upwards.

"Yeah," you hummed, nodding, "that makes sense, I suppose." An exhausted, quiet sigh fell from your nose. Severus caught wind of it and turned towards you with furrowed brows.

"Does he act like that with you?"

"No- well, yes, but no," You sighed again, sitting up in your seat as you stumbled over your words. "When I came back from... seeing... you, he was awake-"

"Did he hurt you?" Severus interrupted you as quick as lightning, his face thunderous as his head snapped to face yours, eyes narrowing in suspicion. Merlin, if that little weasel hurt you, only God could save him now.

"No- he was just a little..." You shook your head, your fingers absentmindedly slipping to the wrist that Ben had gripped tightly.

"A little what?" Severus's eyes fell to where your fingers were, growing worried.

"Rough." You shrugged, swallowing.

"...Rough?" Severus repeated, spitting the word out like he'd just tasted poison.

"It's nothing, honestly, he hasn't done it since." You glanced up at the Potions Master, who looked absolutely furious. In fact, it looked like he could kill someone right then and there.

"If he laid a hand on you, Y/N, I don't think it's 'nothing'." His voice was deep, serious. The care he expressed for you made your skin feel a little hot, even though the situation was a bit inappropriate.

"He didn't, I swear, he just... grabbed my wrist a little harshly, that's it." You replied, your eyes flicking between his that were quickly filling with fury.

"If he hurts you, you will tell me." Severus said quietly, though his tone was still rather solid and serious. "I loathe the fact that I can't keep you from harm whilst Bluewater's still.. lolling around like some blithering idiot." He added, whispering. That familiar warmth bloomed in your chest again, and you couldn't fight the smile that danced onto your face.

"Like I said, once he leaves Hogwarts, I'll end it. He's a little... unpredictable, you could say, at the moment." You sighed, your eyes falling to your lap where you fidgeted with your fingers underneath the table, your mind creeping back to the moments where Ben had acted a little strangely. "I don't want any drama to happen here, it's... I just don't."

A cool hand settled atop of your moving digits, and within seconds, you felt at ease. "If you need me to accompany you, I will." Severus muttered, his eyes returning to the tables of students that were quickly filling up. You didn't look up at him, afraid that someone might notice, and so you kept your eyes down, instead opting to trace your thumb against the back of his hand. This was a very intimate moment between the two of you, and you suddenly found yourself wishing it wasn't happening in the Great Hall, surrounded by your colleagues and students.

"I'm not sure that'd be a good idea," you hummed thoughtfully, "I don't think he'd take it well if he saw you with me. He hates you enough, I'm not sure he can hate you much more. It might just push him over the edge." You added with a soft chuckle, earning a gentle huff from the man beside you.

"How terrible," Severus said flatly, his tone soaked with sarcasm. The corner of your lip quirked up at his dry humour. "I don't doubt it would." He was silent again, evidently busy in that brilliant mind of his that you had grown to adore. "Even so, why did you choose to date such a delinquent?"

"Erm..." Your face flushed red again, and your thumb froze atop of his hand.

Little did you know, Minerva had been carefully observing the two of you. She sat on the far right corner of the long table, by the door you had entered through; her wrinkled eyes soft and admiring. A small, content smile crept onto her lips as she stared at you and Severus talking quietly amongst yourselves. Perhaps she was wrong about the two of you - maybe you were just what the other needed. She'd never seen Severus look so enamoured with someone, let alone happy. She'd noticed how his eyes twinkled brighter, how his words had become lighter, and how his previously gloomy energy had entirely shifted ever since you returned to Hogwarts.

Minerva wasn't going to stand in the way of Severus's happiness, God knows he needs it. Even though you hadn't been around for long, she had a fairly strong feeling that you were going to change him for the better, perhaps even forever. That's what she hoped at least, and the glowing smiles on your faces were concrete evidence of that. Now, she just hoped you'd see the same and end things with Ben. Had Minerva seen how you and Severus looked at and acted with one another, she would have felt like a fool for encouraging you to stay with Ben.

A creak sounded to the left of her, "Everythin' a'right?" Hagrid asked, leaning down to reach her ear. Minerva looked up at the professor and sighed gently, her shoulders relaxing as she glanced back to you and Severus, a warmth enveloping her heart as she saw his hand in your lap, gently holding your hand with such tenderness and care. She blinked rapidly as she continued to stare, a little taken aback at the unusual gesture from Severus. The older witch had never seen him do such a thing.

At that moment, she knew she was wrong. Merlin, she was so wrong. How could he hurt you when he held you so tenderly? There was more to this than just lust, and perhaps spontaneity. There was a much, much deeper side, and she could see it now. Severus cared for you, deeply. It was in his eyes, his actions, his body language. Everything was pointing to... love.

"Everything is wonderful, Hagrid." Minerva's smile widened as she finally tore her eyes away from the pair of you, letting them fall back onto Hagrid's inquisitive ones.

"Oh, well," Hagrid replied, smiling, "good, good." A pleasant chuckle rumbled in his huge chest. "Can't wait fer dinner." He added as a gurgle sounded from his rotund stomach. Rolling her eyes amusedly at Hagrid's words, Minerva cast one last glimpse at the two of you, her heart almost bursting with joy as she saw the faintest hint of a genuine smile on Severus's face. He was smiling.

Dinner couldn't have gone better for you. Forgetting about the whole awful dress ordeal, it went more than well. Currently, you were walking to Lupin's classroom, a thrilling concoction of excitement and anxiety swirling around inside of you.

"Remus?" You called out as you opened his classroom door, the creak of the old oak door echoing. There wasn't an answer. Your brows furrowed as you glanced up at the clock on the wall. It was seven o'clock in the evening, like you'd agreed. Perhaps he's running late, or... he forgot, you thought, a little pang shooting through your heart. You didn't see him at dinner either.

"Ah, Y/N, right on time!" Lupin's enthusiastic voice came from behind you and your whole body flinched. He could have at least made his presence known in a quieter way, you thought to yourself as you tried to calm your racing heart. 

"Bloody hell!" Your shoulders tensed up as you spun around to face the Defence Against the Dark Arts teacher, exhaling through your nose. Lupin chuckled at you, obviously amused by your skittish reaction. "I thought you'd forgotten." You hummed, half-smiling at him. Lupin's brows furrowed at you.

"Now, why would I do that?" He tilted his head at you, scooching past you to slip into his room, flicking his wand to ignite some candles. You pursed your lips at his words, unsure, instead opting to shrug at him. Lupin offered you a kind smile and beckoned you to follow him up the short set of stairs to the adjoined office.

"So, you wish to learn how to produce a Patronus charm, correct?" Remus asked as he padded towards a brown chest, leaning against it with folded arms. You stopped short from him and nodded.

"Hopefully, yes," you chuckled, swallowing, "I'd rather not go through that whole... ordeal again." A nervous grin tugged at the corners of your lips as you fidgeted with your wand that rested comfortably in your hands.

"Before we begin, do you know what a Patronus is?" Remus questioned, raising his bushy brows at you, curious.

"Yes." You nodded, waiting patiently.

"Alright. I want you to think of a happy memory, a very happy one, at that, and picture it in your mind," Remus paused, leaning forwards a tad. "Close your eyes, and concentrate for me."

You closed your eyes and shuffled through your memories, a certain one of you and your childhood bestfriend sticking out. The two of you were running on a beach together, giggling your little heads off. You remembered how the wet sand felt between your toes as you sprinted across the shoreline with your friend, tickling the soles of your tiny feet; the way the salty wind whipped through your hair and filled your nose with the briny, tangy smell of the ocean.

"Hey! No fair!" You'd screamed at your friend, a bright and mischievous grin painted on your innocent face as they'd just tagged you in a game of 'It'.

A tiny smile picked at the corner of your lips as you reminisced.

"Allow yourself to explore your past," Remus said softly as he circled you, "Let the memory fill you up, then speak the incantation, 'Expecto Patronum'."

"Expecto Patronum." You repeated with closed eyes, focusing solely on your childhood memory.

"Very good." Remus commented. "Shall we?" He asked, prompting you to open your eyes. You gave him a confident nod, taking a deep breath. "Now, this is a boggart, it's not the real thing of course. I'd be a brainless fool to bring you a true dementor to practice on." Remus joked lightly. You huffed amusedly, feeling your heart start to hammer against your ribcage, anxiously anticipating Lupin to open the chest.

"Okay, I'm ready." You nodded once more, drawing your wand. With alert eyes, you watched as Remus opened it, a billowing cloud of dark fog spilling out of the chest as a dementor revealed itself; that same haunting rattling-like sucking nose emitting from it's mouth. Your breath hitched at the sight, and your legs went numb.

"Expecto Patronum!" You exclaimed, focusing intently on the memory in your mind. Your lungs heaved as you noticed nothing was appearing from your wand. With frightened eyes, you glanced at Remus as the dementor approached you, it's hands raising upwards as if to grab you. "Expecto Patronum!" You called out once more. Nothing happened. Remus quickly rushed in front of you and cast out his arms.

"Here!" He yelled, and you watched in awe as the dementor quickly transformed into a full moon, shrouded in clouds. "Riddikulus!" Remus chanted, flicking his wand at the boggart. You turned away from Lupin and let a quiet sigh of irritation slip from your lips. "You'll get there, Y/N. You're a strong witch." Lupin assured you, his voice confident. You heard the chest click shut behind you.

"Again." You simply said, inhaling deeply as you turned around, catching a surprised look on Lupin's face as he shoved his hands into his pockets. "I want to do this. I don't care how long it takes." With balled fists, you felt your nails dig into your palms.

"I admire your determination," Remus smiled crookedly at you, nodding. "Alright, let's go. Ready?"

"Ready."

More than an hour - or so you thought - had passed, and you were still by Lupin's side, persisting relentlessly through each attempt at casting the charm. You knew it'd take a while, but you thought you would've been able to have gotten somewhat close. That just wasn't the case.

Again, you found yourself facing the boggart as it emerged from the chest engulfed in a dark, gritty-coloured fog, floating harrowingly towards you. That same forsaken noise echoed within the office once more, and you drew your wand, pointing it at the dementor, unyielding.

"Expecto Patronum!" You shouted, the grip on your wand tightening with every suffocating breath you took. Nothing happened. Again.

Without delay, Lupin flicked his wand and kicked the boggart back into the chest as you tried to catch your breath. It felt like you'd been in here for days, exhausting every inch of your trembling body.

"Don't be too hard on yourself, not everyone manages to produce a patronus on their first lesson." Lupin offered you a kind smile, his eyes gazing over your heaving frame. You shook your head at him, refusing to give up. "May I ask what you were thinking of? Maybe it wasn't powerful enough."

"It was a memory from, uh, my childhood- erm," You panted, standing up a little straighter. "I was playing a game with my best friend on the beach."

"Oh, Y/N, that's not nearly enough. You need a memory that evokes such a compelling... and-and passionate feeling within you, that it's almost... overwhelming." Lupin explained, stepping forwards, shoving his hands into his pockets lazily. You shut your eyes again, determined. Suddenly, the thought of Severus popped into your mind, and a small smile tickled your lips. You thought back to all the times you'd shared with him when you had been truly happy - only a certain, aching memory sticking out like a sore thumb.

You turned your attention back to the record player and let your fingers trace the beautiful grains and grooves of the wood; the pads of your index and middle finger ending up on his record collection. You let your nosiness kick in as you flicked through them, spotting some seventies rock bands, classical compilations, and... Frank Sinatra?

"Frank Sinatra?" You queried with a curious, amused smile, glancing at Severus over your shoulder. Butterflies exploded like storm in your stomach when you found him already staring at you, though the look on his face wasn't what you wanted. He looked a little miffed. "I like Frank Sinatra." You quickly added, wanting to avoid any sort of conflict. You glanced back to where your fingers where dipping into his record collection, a furious pink blush tinting your pale cheeks. As you slipped your hand away, the end of your finger caught the play button, and suddenly the room was filled with a dark, melancholic and slow rock song. Your eyes widened in panic as you tried frantically to turn it off, however, nothing was working.

"Leave it, I... like it." Came a voice from behind you, immediately halting you in your desperate, albeit poor attempts to pause it. Severus was still sat at his desk, but he was sat back now, a little more relaxed.

"It's nice," You commented quietly after a beat of silence, braving a look at Severus. His eyes were glued to his desk; the plate of turkey and vegetables pushed messily to the side. He seemed to be battling something. You swallowed thickly and sauntered over to him, your heels clacking against the brick floor. You stopped in front of him and held out your hand. "...Dance with me?" You asked, voice still quiet. The Potions Master looked up at you for several seconds, his harsh, dark eyes flicking to your open palm. Your heart was thumping so loud in your ears you were worried you wouldn't hear his answer.

Luckily for you, he didn't give you one. He just plainly accepted your hand, standing slowly, almost reluctantly. You backed away from his desk, one step at a time, his large, calloused and cold hand still in yours. You stopped in the middle of the room, gently pulling Severus closer to you. A smile tugged at your lips as you looked up to meet his cold gaze, placing his other hand on your hip. You began to sway side to side to the slow beat of the song, his fingers flinching slightly as you moved. Severus found himself lost in your eyes as you stared up at him. He wondered why someone like you had offered to dance with someone like him; it felt wrong almost, a Hufflepuff and a Slytherin, good and bad. As the chorus got going, a bright grin broke out on your face as Severus lifted his arm up to twirl you around, the skirt of your dress blooming outwards like a flower. His chest tightened as you stumbled slightly, your hand slipping onto his chest to steady yourself.

"Sorry." you muttered almost inaudibly, looking up at Snape through your lashes bashfully. He didn't reply, he only danced with you more, and you saw his the corner of his lips quirk up in a small, almost miniscule smile. Your heart fluttered at the sight and your smile was back on your face.

The two of you continued to dance carelessly to the song playing in the background, and any worries and anxieties had been long forgotten ever since the two of you touched palms. You found yourself getting lost in his eyes as Severus twirled you around again, a loud laugh leaving your lips as he brought you back towards him, his eyes half-lidded with admiration. You lifted your hand up this time and attempted to twirl Snape around. He almost fought against it, but the sad pout on your lips ultimately broke him, and so he let you twirl him around.

"Are you alright?" Lupin's voice had softened, fishing you from your deep memory. A tear had fallen from your eye as you opened them.

A gentle laugh fell from your lips as you suddenly became aware of the tears brimming your eyes. You lifted up a hand to quickly swipe them away, your cheeks flushing awkwardly. "Yes, sorry- I... it's just a very, erm, deep memory for me."

"I can see." Lupin smiled at you, gesturing to the tear rolling down your cheek. "I'm sure it will work." He assured you, his tone still soft. You could tell he was a little concerned for your welfare, but he didn't dare press you for answers. He knew how certain memories could evoke such intense emotions. "Ready, Professor L/N?"

"Ready as ever." You sighed shakily through your mouth, pointing your wand at the chest. Lupin nodded, and with a whoosh, he opened the chest once more, the echo of the Dementor's rattling lungs devouring your body whole. Your heart pounded as you stared fear straight in the face, only the memory of you and Severus keeping you grounded.

You inhaled and shouted, "Expecto Patronum!"

And suddenly, a blinding, blue-white twirling light formed an umbrella-like shape at the tip of your wand, and you gasped; an impossibly wide toothy-grin spreading across your face like a wildfire. You glanced at Lupin, whose eyes were shot wide, quite obviously in complete disbelief from what he had just witnessed. His mouth hung open as he stared at you, a matching grin reaching his mouth as you forced the boggart back into the chest, falling to the ground as the charm dissipated from the tip of your wand.

You were absolutely breathless - it felt as if someone had just punched you in the chest. "Oh my God," you giggled, panting as you sat on your hands and knees, "I did it! Holy shit- I did it, Remus!"

"Bloody brilliant! Well done, Y/N. Not many witches or wizards are capable of such a thing. You look to be a very promising one, definitely." Lupin grinned down at you, leaning on the top of the chest, fingers splayed out exhaustedly. "I think that's enough for this evening, you must be exhausted, my dear."

"Precisely that, Remus," You laughed breathlessly again, unable to contain the proud grin that wasn't disappearing from your mouth anytime soon. "Thank you. So much." Remus walked over to you and held out a hand to help you up, in which you happily took it and pulled yourself up, sighing as you reached your feet.

"It's my pleasure." He smiled at you, his hands returning to his pockets again. That seemed to be a signature pose of his. "Soon enough, you'll be able find out your corporeal patronus."

"My what?-" Your eyes widened slightly at the phrase, blinking cluelessly.

"Your corporeal patronus. It's the most powerful form of a patronus, it takes the shape of an animal that represents your character, and protects you- being able to fully drive dementors away." Lupin explained, wandering over to a desk and leaning against it casually.

"Do you know yours?" You asked curiously, watching as Lupin's eyes twitched nervously, glancing away from you.

"Yes." Lupin answered simply, a weak smile slipped onto his lips, silently indicating that he didn't want to talk about it further.

"Cool." You beamed at him, the corners of his lips curling up. Lupin was rather grateful that you didn't ask him anything else to do with his patronus, he was hiding enough as it was. The man really didn't need any extra stress.

"Very." Lupin replied with a nod. Your smile widened. "I think you'll sleep well tonight, that's for sure." He joked, earning a quiet chuckle from you.

"Honestly, I can't wait to get into bed. I'm exhausted." You laughed, running a tired hand through your hair, a few fingers getting caught within the knots of it. "Thanks for tonight, Remus, I just hope I can pull it off in the real situation." Another laugh fell from your mouth, though it felt more of a worried laugh than an amused one.

"Let's hope you don't ever need to use it." Lupin said to you, the creases beside his eyes wrinkling as he smiled at you with slumping shoulders.

"Night, Remus."

"Goodnight, Y/N."

Your walk back from Lupin's classroom was rather dull, and awfully cold. Your skin was rife with goosebumps as the chilly air ravaged your body, infiltrating every part of you. All you wanted to do was to get back to your warm, cosy bed. Your body shuddered pleasantly at the thought of being wrapped up in it, the soft and plump pillows engulfing your head, encouraging you to fall into a deep, dreamy sleep.

To be honest, you weren't even sure what time it was, but you knew it was rather late as the moon was shining brilliantly in the nightsky amongst the beauty of the sparkling stars. You halted yourself for a moment to admire it, and suddenly a sense of déjà vu sunk into your bones. A year ago, you'd been in the same place, staring up at the sky to admire the stars with a bag of Mandrake roots in hand. You were on the way to drop them off to Severus for the potion to save the students. That was the first time you and him had really spoken without a burning hatred for one another. There was no malice, instead it was civil for once, and if you remember correctly - you'd even cracked some jokes.

A faint smile crossed your features and you hummed to yourself as your eyes were still darting across the millions upon millions of stars dotted against the infinite black.

Severus.

You wondered if he was still awake. He most likely was, that man never slept, though, you wished he did. You knew you should get back to Ben, just to save face, however, the urge to go and see him was drowning you. The biting cold was devouring your body like a starving tiger at this point, but you still stood idly, stuck on the thought of paying the dungeon bat a visit. Gods, you really shouldn't. You don't exactly want to risk Ben becoming suspicious. The thought of him finding out and doing something regrettable loomed over you like a dark rain cloud, and it was growing heavier by the day. Ben wasn't exactly the think-before-you-speak type, and so you worried over what he might do if he found out you and Severus were secretly seeing each other.

Should you go and see Severus? He could settle your mind right now... No, no, no. You need to go back to your quarters. Ben's probably worrying about you again.

That familiar, heavy feeling of guilt began to rot your body again as your feet were glued to the ground, unmoving. You were truly stuck. What the hell do you do?

Part 13!

what do you think Y/N should do?! 🫣

i apologise if this was a boring chapter, i feel like not a lot happened... despite this i hope you enjoyed it! there will be more snape x reader interaction next chapter i promise ;(

let me know what you thought! and also let me know what you think Y/N should do! i'm excited to see your thoughts and replies, they always make me smile! <3 🤭

i hope you guys are having or have had a great day/night, and i hope you have a great day tomorrow. ALSO make sure you are staying hydrated and healthy guys! AND i hope you are getting enough sleep!! 🩵🤲🏼🩵

i feel like i said hope around 100 times 😂

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[wowbright]

Anderson’s Guide to the Birds of North America, Chapter 1: Lover Boy

Summary: Fourteen scenes from the lives of Blaine Anderson, grad student and avid birder, and Kurt Hummel, clothing designer and Vogue writer, from before their first meeting in the spring of 2020 through falling in love.

Note: Back during the COVID lockdowns I wrote a couple hundred words of Klaine lockdown meet-cute. I thought I would write more, but I guess I didn't feel like writing about the COVID lockdown during the COVID lockdown, so I never did and I never posted the tiny bit I had written. Thanks to Klaine Valentine’s Challenge 2025, I’m finally doing the thing! I'm trying to keep each chapter to around 500 words. Thanks @spaceorphan!

AO3

~~~

Chapter 1: Lover Boy

Blaine was going to go insane.

He knew he should be grateful. He had it better than a lot of other people. He didn't have to worry about where his next paycheck was coming from, because he didn't get a paycheck, because he was an idiot who had, for some reason, decided his fascination with birds was enough to carry him through another five years of school at minimum after completing college. More to the point, he received monthly distributions from a trust fund his grandparents had set up for him in their wills, and though it didn't make him filthy rich, it gave him enough to live on without having to worry about finances.

But he never would have moved in with Cooper if he’d known they'd be locked up together for weeks (or would it be months?) on end. He loved his brother, but his brother was a lot. At least they had separate bedrooms, plus Cooper had the recording studio and was staying fairly busy with audiobook work. Unfortunately, Cooper did not keep all of his acting and voice exercises to the studio. Nor did he keep his opinions to himself, no matter how many times Blaine said, “I'm not changing what I'm making for dinner,” and “This is what I choose to wear and your opinion has no bearing on the matter,” and “I'm sorry you can't go to the gym, but no, you do not have my permission to use me as a dumbbell for bench presses.”

Blaine was spending increasing amounts of time shut in his bedroom with ear plugs and noise canceling headphones on, working on compiling and coding his field research notes and, when that became too tiresome, checking recently submitted species sightings on ebird.org for potential errors.

Today, he was listening to his Upbeat Sexy With a Twist of Romance playlist—the one he used to listen to while getting dressed for a night out on the town. Oh, what a different time that had been. Now instead of gelling his hair while crooning along to Freddie Mercury singing Ooh, love, ooh, loverboy, whatcha doin’ tonight?  while hoping to get laid or better yet find love, he was bobbing along to the song while entering numbers into a spreadsheet.

But that could be good, too. The rhythm of the music combined with the spreadsheet sent him into a near hypnotic trance that made him forget time and boredom and COVID. It was as close as Blaine got to heaven these days.

A sudden weight on his shoulder jarred him out of his trance.

His brother period of course. Just when Blaine’s mind had found some semblance of peace, Cooper had to disturb it.

He removed his headphones and one ear plug. “What is it, Coop?”

“New lockdown project: I’m going to turbocharge my manscaping routine. I need waxing tips.”

“You interrupted my work for that?”

Cooper waved at the computer screen dismissively. “You should be thanking me. That must be incredibly boring. What do all those numbers even mean?”

Blaine looked at his brother. He looked at the numbers. He looked at his brother again. “I mean this with all due respect, but I seriously want to kill you right now.” He closed his eyes. He took a breath. “I'm going for a walk.”

Blaine had already been for a walk that morning. It was the migratory season, so of course he had. He’d gone out with his binoculars as soon as the sun started twinkling over the horizon. He’d ticked off twenty-seven species, including his first American redstart of the season along with plenty of palm and yellow-rumped warblers, but apparently two hours of birding in the morning wasn't enough to keep him sane.

He jumped from his chair, pulled on a jacket, and grabbed his binoculars. “I'm going to walk until I no longer feel murderous. Love you!” The door slammed behind him.

[ireneanon]

Comfort

Red Velvet Irene x fem reader

Irene’s solo debut was coming closer and closer and while she felt confident in herself (the whole theme of the comeback), she couldn’t help but to constantly feel like there was something missing every time she looked at it.

The dorm was silent, after making small talk, Wendy decided to let Irene work and went to sleep, leaving only the soft hum of the air conditioner and the occasional creak of the furniture. Irene sat at the dining table, her laptop glowing softly in front of her. She had been staring at the schedule for what felt like hours, her thoughts swirling with doubt and frustration. The comeback preparations were well underway, but something about it felt off to her. Was it the choreography? The concept? The songs? She couldn’t pinpoint it, and the uncertainty was driving her insane.

Her phone buzzed on the table, the screen lighting up with a message from you, “how’s everything going, Joohyun? need a break?” Irene’s lips curved into a small smile, but it quickly faded as she typed back a short reply, “I’m fine, Just busy.”

“Busy” was an understatement, Irene thought, running a hand through her hair. The weight of not only the fans but her own expectations felt heavier with every passing day. The fans, the company, her members, were all counting on her to deliver perfection. Her phone buzzed again.

“I know that ‘I’m okay’ means you’re not okay. talk to me, Joohyun.”

Irene sighed, staring at the message. She knew you weren’t one to give up easily, especially when it came to her, she loved that about you. Her fingers hovered over the keyboard, debating whether to brush you off again or admit the truth. Before she could decide, another message popped up.

“you don’t have to worry in silence, im always here for you, you know that.”

That simple line unraveled something inside her. Irene bit her lip, trying to suppress the tears threatening to fall. After a moment’s hesitation, she replied, “It’s a lot y/n. The comeback, the pressure… I don’t feel like it’s good enough”

The response was almost immediate. “do you need me to come over? or I’ll stay here, whatever you need”

For the first time this long, long night, Irene felt a small sense of relief.

Irene stared at your message for a moment, her fingers trembling slightly over the keyboard. She hesitated before typing, “You don’t have to come over. I’ll be fine. Just… stay with me here for a bit?”

The typing bubble appeared immediately, and within seconds, another reply came through. “of course. I’m not going anywhere, I’m here as long as you need me”.

A soft smile tugged at Irene’s lips, the tension in her shoulders easing just a little. Setting her phone down, she took a deep breath. It felt comforting to know that even from afar, you were there, patient, understanding, and always ready to listen. She typed again, still worried about being a burden.

“I feel like I’m not enough, like I can’t meet everyone’s expectations.”

You replied just as quickly as before. “Joohyun, you’re more than enough. you’ve been working so hard, and it shows. this comeback isn’t for your fans, it’s for you, trust yourself, it’s okay to feel this way. it doesn’t make you any less talented”

Irene rested her head on the table, reading the message over and over. She wanted to believe it, but the weight of her doubts made it so hard. Her phone buzzed again.

“you’ve been working so hard and carrying so much doubt on yourself. let me help, even if it’s just by listening. tell me everything that’s on your mind”

Seeing the sincerity in those words made her chest tighten. She knows you believe in her, you’ve always been vocal about that. With trembling hands, she began to type, pouring out the thoughts she’d kept bottled up. She told you all about the sleepless nights, the rehearsals that never felt perfect enough, the nagging fear of letting everyone down.

And you, like always, responded to every single one of her fears with words of comfort and reassurance.

As Irene shared her worries, a warmth began to spread through her, a comforting feeling of being truly seen and understood. With every word she typed, she felt more vulnerable, but it was comforting, your presence, even through text, was comforting. And as the minutes passed, the room seemed a little less daunting, the shadows a little less heavy.

“you’re not alone, Joohyun. Not now, not ever. And I’m so proud of you, even when you can’t see it yourself.”

Irene’s heart swelled, feeling the love, comfort and reassurance she desperately craved from you. She wanted to respond, to thank you for reminding her of the strength she has that she so forgets, but she didn’t have to. The next message that you sent appeared on her screen, a simple, yet heartfelt offer: “let me take care of you tonight, let me remind you of how amazing you are.”

Her chest ached with the intensity of the emotion she felt. Without thinking, she pressed her face into her hands and let out a shaky laugh that felt like a weight being lifted. She wiped at her eyes before typing, “I’d like that. More than anything.”

A few moments passed before the phone lit up again, this time with a photo attachment. It was a picture of you in your car with a smile, holding up a bouquet of her favorite flower, and a bag from the convenience store. The message attached reading: “Get ready, Joohyun 😈”

Irene couldn’t help but laugh a little at your use of emojis, the first genuine smile of the day. The thought of you coming over and wrapping her in your familiar arms, whispering words of comfort in her ear, filling her with a sense of peace she hadn’t felt in days.

Just as she was about to stand up to prepare for your arrival, a knock at the door startled her. Irene’s heart skipped a beat as she glanced at her phone—no text, no warning. She rushed to wipe the last of her tears away and quickly looked in the mirror to fix her hair, she finally took a deep breath before walking over and opening the door.

There stood her y/n, a playful smile on your face, holding up the flowers with one hand and a bag of snacks in the other. Your eyes softening when they meet Irene, looking a little more vulnerable than usual. Without a word, you stepped forward and pulled Irene into a tight embrace.

“I’m here” you whispered, your voice soft and full of certainty.

Irene’s eyes welled up again, but this time with a warmth that spread through her like sunshine. She clung to you, letting the tension finally melt away, piece by piece.

“Thank you for coming” she whispered, feeling safe and seen.

“Always,” you replied, pressing a gentle kiss to her temple.

The room was silent except for the quiet rustle of the snacks you brought. You pull away just enough to look at Irene, eyes full of concern and affection. Irene took a shaky breath and wiped her eyes with the back of her hand, a small smile playing at her lips.

“Do you want to talk about it, baby?” you ask, sitting down next to her. Irene nods slowly, feeling the knot of worry in her chest loosen just a bit. She glanced at the snacks—her favorite, a mix of sweet and salty—and let out a small laugh.

“You know me too well,” Irene said, her voice softer than before.

“Of course I do” you say with a smug look. “Now, tell me what’s really going on.”

Irene hesitated, the weight of her fears threatening to rush back, but the look in your eyes told her that she could share this, that she didn’t have to bear it alone anymore.

“It’s the comeback,” Irene admits, her voice barely above a whisper. “I don’t know if I’m doing enough, if it’s good enough. I keep thinking, ‘what if I let the members down?’, ‘What if I disappoint the fans?’, ‘What if you don’t like it’….The pressure is just… overwhelming.”

You reached out, placing a hand on her hand, “Joohyun, you’re incredible. You’ve worked so hard for this, and I’ve seen it everyday. The late nights, the rehearsals, the dedication—you’re it giving more than anyone could ask for. it’s only natural to feel like this. It’s okay to be scared. It doesn’t mean you’re not enough.”

Irene looked up, eyes soft and glistening. The warmth in your’s gaze reassured her, made her feel safe in a way that nothing else had in weeks. It was hard to accept that she didn’t have to bear this alone, that someone else could share the weight, even just by being there.

“You really think so?” Irene asked, her voice unsure.

“Absolutely,” you respond, giving her hand a gentle squeeze. “And if you need a reminder, I’ll be here to tell you every day, every hour, even every minute if I have to.”

Irene felt her heart swell at the promise. She leaned into your embrace again, this time letting herself relax into the comfort of your presence. It felt like the heaviness was finally starting to lift, even if just a little, she knew you’d be there every step of the way.

“Thank you,” Irene whispered again, this time with more conviction. “For being here, for reminding me… that I’m not alone.”

“You’re never alone, Joohyun. Not as long as I’m here.”

For the first time in days, Irene let herself believe that everything was going to be okay. With you by her side, the daunting challenge of her solo debut didn’t seem so impossible anymore. There would still be struggles, moments of doubt and fear, but now she knew she didn’t have to face them alone.

And just for that, she was more grateful than she could ever put into words.

[wonymao]

──★ ˙ ̟. supernova love 𖹭 !!

a supernova glowin' the dark, forever i wished upon a star. then you came over, occupied my heart, occupied my heart <3

a/n; this is my first time writing a fic! HEAVILY inspired by dream contact: our wish and also supernova love by ive&david guetta because i've been obsessing over that song since it came out (ive never misses)

no cw! fluff cheesy n cringy sakuya, not proofread!! sakuya fic about astronomy kinda??

saku x fem!reader

wc: around 2.3k

a supernova glowin' the dark

forever i wished upon a star ::

astronomy. something about astronomy has always been calling your name. you've always been interested in it, i mean who isnt curious about outerspace? you'd have to be insane not to wonder whats out there, right? or maybe youre just too much of a nerd like your friends say..

everynight you would stargaze on the top of your roof, using it as a stress reliever while listening to your favourite songs and drawing sketches of different planets, stars, galaxies, anything that comes to your mind that day.

2:47am

coming down from your roof, stepping into your room from the window. forgetting to close the window behind you. laying on your bed, lights off, window open with the wind blowing your curtains. with the window open, its hard to fall asleep. the cold air seeping into your room, but being too lazy to get up and close it. slowly closing your eyes adjusting to the cold room, a neon green colour invades your room. instantly opening your eyes and seeing the prettiest green ever suddenly wakes you up.

running to your window, you spot a bright neon green star in the sky. looking through your telescope immediatly, getting a closer look. your heart beats faster, never in your life have you ever seen a pretty star like this one. running back to your bedside table to grab your phone to snap a picture of it, yet once you come back to your window sill, its gone..? the star just.. disappeared

how can you go to sleep after that? while the star is still fresh in your mind, you start to sketch what the star looked like. walking back to your bed sketch book and coloured pencils in your hand, getting comfortable in your sheets. eventually passing out with an unfinished drawing of that star you saw that night.

its been a week since that event happened and you cant stop thinking of it. ever since that day youve been wishing everynight looking up at the stars. 'please show me that star once more' you want to know if what you saw was real, if you were just so tired you started imagining things.

because that morning you woke up, you immediatly ran to turn on your computer searching for neon green star spottings, yet nothing showed up. only fake stock images.

you sit on the bench that you always sit on daily while waiting for the train that takes you back home after your cram school. you were let out early. 15 minutes till the train comes, its cold too. to pass time you pull out your sketchbook. flipping through the sketches of all the green stars youve drawn, you begin to skecth it again. you want to sketch a drawing similar to what you saw.

as your minding your own buisness, you feel a pair of eyes on you over your shoulder. turning around you see this guy, munching on bread staring at your drawing with wide eyes. he looks about your age, but why does he look like he jjst saw a ghost??

"that green star.. you saw that too??" he says with an unexpected deep voice "no way. did you see this as well?!" you stand up excitedly looking at him right in the eyes

"yeah, ive been searching online for any clues on what i saw.. i thought i was the only one" the boy replies sloghtly smiling

you reach out your hand to him "im y/n! im so happy to meet someone who saw it too!"

"im fujinaga sakuya" the boy takes your hand, and sits down on the bench as you follow.

"i tried to take a picture of the star but jist as soon as i picked up my phone it was gone" sakuya says with a hint of sadness in his voice.

"me too! thats why im drawing it because i domt ever want to forget that moment. ever since i saw that ive been wishing too see ot again"

"i hope that wish comes true for the both of us," sakuya says looking at your sketchbook. silence falls with the both of you sitting beside eachother on the bench on the cold. you start flipping through thr pages silently showing him all the skecthes you drew throughout the week. looking at his face for a reacyion he just lets out a little laugh.

the train comes and you both get on. its so warm on the train that you start to feel itchy from how cold it was outside. sakuya sits down and invites you to sit beside him.

the two of you talk about the star you saw that night, but eventually the conversation turns into getting to know eachother. his name is fujinaga sakuya, hes 16. he loves soccer, basketball, and also is interested in astronomy. time moves by so quick you dont even realize you miss you stop. ringing the bell to be let off at the next stop, you get up but he grabs your hand. looking down at the boy whos still seated, you see he's holding out his phone.

"y/n.. uhh.. can i have your phone number?" he shyly asks. you smile to him grabbing his phone and putting your number into it. giving his phine back you wave bye at him while stepping off the train. hes waving back and smiling.

when he mentioned he was interested in astronomy, your heart started beating faster. youve never met someone who liked the same stuff as you, not only that. but hes also really attractive and kind.

you step into your home, taking of you coat and boots, your mom welcoming you back and offering you dinner. after eating you get ready for bed and fall asleep.

----

tge next day you had just got gotten home from school, getting ready for bed you get a notification from your phone. thibking its one of your friends asking help for the homework you sigh, turning on your phone only to see a text from.. fujinaga?!

----

sakuya got to his shared dorm around 8:30pm, taking off his backpack and slipping off his shoes running into the living room like the happiest child ever. "guys you will never guess what happened to me today" sakuya says while 5 boys turn their attention from the tv to him

"i talked to this girl-" sakuya is cut off from his roomates cheering for him. really? he didnt even get to finish his sentence but theyre cheering for him like he just accomplished the hardest thing ever

"our saku-chan finally getting a girlfriend?" riku jokes nudging the youngers arm

sakuya blushes at the thought of the girl being his. "yeab so what? i talked to a girl and you guys didnt. i know youre all jealous."

the room goes dead silent. the first to break the silence is sion laughing follwed by the others. sakuya jist ignores their teasing and goes to his room to get ready for bed.

the next dayduring rheir shared dinner sakuya asks for advixe on how to strike a conversation with the girl. "just ask her to go to that bakery you always go to or sometbinf" yushi suggests

"hyung youre so smart!" sakuya says pulling out his phone and starts texting away. naturally the 5 boys gathering around him watching the conversation between him and the girl

"YOOO SHE SENT A HAND HEART SAKU SHE LIKES YOU" Riku says slapping sakus shoulder "orrr she could just be nice, but i doubt that" ryo adds on

"our little sakuya has a date tomorrow" daeyoung says hugging the younger boy. sakuya smiling to himself as his face flushes thinking of getting to see her again.

sakuya hurriedly goes to his room to try and get some good sleep so he can be refreshed and full of energy for tomorrow.

---

then you came over, occupied my heart,

occupied my heart <3 ::

its been 2 months since youve met sakuya and youve been hanging out with him very often. youd be lying to yourself if you said you didnt like him. everytime he looks at you with those eyes you feel you heart beat faster, cheeks flushing red. whenver he asked why you were red you would jist say its from the cold. but you didnt know that he knew it was because of him, i mean it was already spring. shouldnt you be saying its too hot? sakuya was just waiting for the perfect time to tell you what he truly felt about you.

even thiugh he knew you liked him because youre not so good at hiding your feelings, deep down, he thought maybe you were just being nice like what ryo said when he first asked for advice.

you both saw that green star on febuary 7th. he wantes to confess to you april 7th. that day also happened to be your birthday.

"soo whens your birthday?" sakuya asks while tilting his head at you. you stop eating your food to reply "its april 7th" sakuyas mouth is wide open "REALLY??" sakuya says shocked "yeah why?" you slightly laugh at his cuteness

"oh.. nothing, its just next week" he awkwardly laughs realizing his actions were too weird "are you doing anything that day?" he asks. "yeah im going bowling with my friends!" you reply smiling like an idiot

sakuya reaches his hands across the table and holds yours. "what about after that?" you feel your face heat up

"i wanna see you on your birthday" sakuya boldly says

"w-we'll most likely be done after 7ish.." you say trying not to move, you want to hide away from this situation. as much as you like it, its embarassing

"okay cant wait to celebrate your birthday at 7:30pm jist the two of us" sakuya says while letting go of your hands to finish his bread.

the rest of the dinner with him goes well, you trying to forget what hapoened to calm your heart down.

-----

april 7th.

you wake up in a good mood, i mean its your birthday and you have fun plans for today. you get ready, trying extra hard to look good today. not only for the amount of pictures youre gonna take today, but also for.. sakuya.

as the time gets closer to 7:30 your heart beats faster. god you really cant think of sakuya without blushing and almost looking like a fool in love.

he told you that he wanted to celebrate your birthdah togetger in your house, and you agreed. its currently 7:15. waiting for him, you touch up your makeup and hair, also cleaning uo your room a little.

*ding dong* you hear the doorbell from the front door. you told your mom not to asnwer the door if someone knocked because you told her your friend was coming over. your mom makes raises an eyebrow at you because you normally never say that to her, so she assumes ots a boy. which she was righr when she hears you greet a deep voice boy. respecting your privacy she just stays in the living room.

"hi y/n" sakuya says stepping into your house holding a bag of sweefs from wishs bakery and a present

"hi saku! omg you didnt have tk get me a present" you shyly say

"its your birthday of course i had to" he says taking off his shoes

"thank you.. come on lets go to my room?" sakuya nods at your request. his heart beating knowing hes about to confess his feelings.

----

"so this is my room!" sakuya looks around, he knew he liked the right girl but seeing your room made his feelings grow even more. he can tell your serious about astronomy.

you both settle into your room, ypu sit on you bed patting the spot beside you which he quickly takes. you both share the sweets he bought, laughing, making jokes and talking like yoh always do.

"wanna see your present?" sakuya gets uo and walks towards yohr desk to pick his present up.

you nod as he gives you the box. you start to open it feeling his eyes on you. a smile instanly lighting up your face as you pull out this pretty milky way snow globe, also a cute teddy bear hokding a heart. you hug sakuya thanking him for the gift.

"open the heart insidd the teddy bear" he says pulljng awat from the hug. listening to what he said, you open the heart. the heart read out

'I think I fell for you, so it’s only fair that you pick me up.'

"saku.. what?" you say looking up at him, face red.

"y/n, ever since that first day i saw you drawing a picture of that green star, i couldnt get you off my mind. i thought about- no i still think about you everyday, how you make me laugh, youre so pretty, smart, kind and.. i ended up falling in love with you. i love you y/n. can i be your boyfriend..?" sakuya says struggling to maintain eye contact, face heating up. you break into tears hugging him.

"yes of course, i wanna be your girlfriend sakuya. i love you too" sakuya hides his face in the crook of your neck and smiles to himself.

"youre the best person that has ever walked into my life" he whispers still hugging you. you break the hug to look at his face. you cant believe it. he's yours? the boy youve liked and known for 2 months confessed to you on your birthday.

sakuya cups your face in his hands

"can i kiss you?" you swear you couldve died in that moment. you silently nod not wanting to speak jist incase if you stuttered too much, or jist having your voice crack

he slowly inches his face closer. your lips meeting, his hand still on your face but his other dropping to lay on your lower back. you wrao you arms around his neck. the kiss only lasfed a couple of seconds but after he pulled away from the kiss you hide your face in his chest. you love him so much.

"this is the best birthday ever, thank you saku."

its crazy to think that you found your boyfriend all because of a green star.

[m1ssunderstanding]

Understanding Lennon McCartney Rewatch Part 3.3

John having to get high out of his mind because he knows he's invited Paul to come play with him is so so sad. These are the same guys who used to sit facing each other on a bed playing guitars for hours, and now this is them?

Is John calling Paul “Jack Lemon” a reference to “some like it hot”? Because if so, I have questions. Anyway, when your estranged best friend shows up to hang out with you and a bunch of people, talking about being in love again and getting jizzed on is extremely normal and acceptable behavior.

This jam session is so fucking painful though. Paul's doing his best to just push through and get them to actually play something and John's just too far gone.

My theory: there's two reasons he did this. 1. He's avoidant and the last thing he's going to do is let on how bad he needs John in his life and how scared he is that if John gets back with Yoko that that'll be difficult. And 2. He couldn't live with himself if he didn't. If he'd kept it from John that Yoko wanted him back and later John cried to him about how much he missed Yoko or something? Paul can't have that.

John singing a snatch of Yesterday before a take of “Whatever gets you through the Night”??? Did either of them ever write a song where they weren't thinking about the other? Did they ever have a minute of peace without the other rattling the bars of the cage in his brain?

“Hold me Darling, come on, listen to me. I won't do you no harm.” Duh it's about Paul. Oh my gosh.

And with Bless You I'm always so torn. There are so many obvious references to Paul which the doc points out beautifully, but situationally it could also be about Yoko. Maybe it's about both of them in the same way that don't let me down is about both of them.

Anyway the cosmic visuals are gorgeous.

Why'd you have to phrase it like that though? Twice?

Hall of Fame moment. It's a high point for him career-wise and he chose to pull Paul into his spotlight. Not only to sing Paul's song, not only to name-drop him, but to publicly call him an official romantic title. Not “boyfriend” or “ex-wife” which both could've been much more mocking if that's what he was trying to do. But “fiance”. It's official and respected, but it's still got the lustful, unsettled, connotation that something like “husband” lacks.

Johann Weener, everyone. What a loser.

Everyone who still refers to Lennon Remembers like it's the fucking Bible listen to this. It doesn't go on for the next five years, let alone fifty.

John refusing to walk to blocks to sign the papers when George and Paul flew over the ocean. And only on the basis of astrology. He really didn't want the divorce. My heart aches for him. But he made his bed as they say.

I'm putting on my tinfoil hat again here, but I do just have to point out that one of John's first songs, “Hello, Little Girl,” has a line that goes, “you never seem to see me standing there”. And the earliest draft of WISHST, which was started soon after, answers that line. “I saw you standing there.” (Yes, it said you originally, not her). So maybe. Just maybe. That song wasn't just a Paul song, but a song that John knew Paul had put a message in for him. Okay, I apologize for the insanity. On another note, I do wonder if he ever found out what Paul thought of that.

Interviewer: ≈ at this point, do you like writing by yourself, or do you want to write with Paul again?≈ John: ≈well it's a bit of both. It's the same for Paul. We were talking about it a week ago. Okay, cool. So they definitely talked openly and honestly about potentially writing together again.

John, about their partnership, “There was always the feeling that someone was there if you needed it.” Paired with the gayest picture ever taken and then Paul singing “if I can do anything at all, let me help.” Thanks. I hate it.

John was so excited for New Orleans! What happened? I mean I have my theory based on May's book and the sudden shift in behavior. But it's pretty dark.

You know how crazy Paul is about John in interviews now? How he can't seem to keep John's name out of his mouth? John was worse in the seventies. He's promoting his Rock’n’Roll album, talking unprompted and romantically about how he met Paul, when the interviewer reminds him what relationship he's supposed to be romanticizing right now. So John remembers too and dedicates the album to Yoko who he's just got back together with.

Biconic quote.

Interviewer asks, after John's brought him up, if John's pleased with how well Paul's doing. John expresses his relief that Ringo has "found himself a niche" and then

I really do think that last bit sums up a big chunk of how John feels about Paul, and why he feels alright playing dirty against Paul or slagging Paul off. Why it would have been the furthest thing from his mind that Paul actually struggled or was insecure. Why Paul had to remind him, “I'm only a person like you, love.”

What an insane thing to think, let alone say. What if Julian had heard that? I'm pretty sure Julian and Paul weren't in contact, really at all, until the eighties, right? So John's doing better than he is at this point (I mean he's his dad, he should be). John is insecure about every possible thing and compares himself to Paul in every possible way.

Baby. He needed some serious help. The thing that sucks about being ahead of your time is that you also have to live in a world that's behind your needs.

And then. “There's always a friendly tv channel to turn to that's going to make you feel less alone.” I wonder if Paul “Call Me Back Again, John I know you're not that tired from the baby just let me in the fucking door” McCartney heard this? It's possible with how obsessive they were, but it's also impossible with how busy he kept himself.

Okay, here's the first story we've been missing about Paul experiencing negative emotions. And, of course, as always in this doc, it's paired perfectly with “Don't Let it Bring you Down” which is the musical mission statement of Paul's clenched-jawed smile philosophy.

"I tend to get a bit absolute in my statements." Yes, John. Yes you do. Another quote that Big Lennon fans should keep in mind.

John on the three weeks he took to decide if he wanted to continue the band after the first Hamburg trip: The others were mad because we could've been making money. Yeah, John, Paul suddenly had to work in a factory after he'd thrown away an educated, white-collar career (the first in his family) to be in your band. I'd be pissed too if you just didn't even bother to call. Anyway I just hate how casual John is about it. Someone who never had to worry about money is just never going to get that.

John doesn't even remember a ballpark number of how much they were making. Paul remembers exactly bragging to his professors that he was making fifteen a week in Hamburg. Sorry to go on and on about this right before Paris, but to me it's an important difference between them.

Anyway, the fact that Paris was more than just a vacation for them. The fact that – according to Stuart and John at least – they might not have come back. It's dizzying. They really thought about just running off together. I wonder what made them decide to come back and continue the band.

No offense if you do, but I don't personally believe in this stuff. What would the motivation have been for the tarot reader to tell him that? Either way, fuck him.

Gosh the live version of “Call Me Back Again”. You feel it, physically, how bad he wants this phonecall. And the desperation from such a successful man is fantastic. Literally, John, how did it feel to be the only man in the world that could get Paul McCartney to beg? “Pretty baby” “what can I do?” “Boohoohoo babe.” “I tried the operator, but I just can't get through.”

Reporter at the Wings over America tour: No John Lennon, no George Harrison, and no Ringo Starr, just Paul McCartney. And for everyone here tonight, that seemed to be plenty! Obviously he's loving this praise after all the negative press. Anyone would, and Paul needs it more than most people actually. But I bet part of him is like “stop. Don't say it like that, they already hate me enough as it is.”

How many times has John admitted that he finds Paul attractive? “It was no surprise, you know, when the kids – girls saw him, they go ‘ooh! Ooh!’ right away, you know?”

“I know it's true. It's all because of you.” Playing over this? Are you kidding me? Anyway I've never seen the picture version of this, so I thought I'd screenshot it.

But actually, in a way, the original written lyrics to Now and Then are less depressing than what he sang on the demo. “I know it's true, I'm still in love with you, and if I make it through, it's all because of you,” is obviously sad because they're both married to other people. But at least in that version, John's saying his own personal resilience to life's struggles comes from his relationship with Paul, which is nice. Whereas when John, who is sliding into a self-hating deep depression I'm comparing himself to Paul's phenomenal success, sings “it's all because of you” in a general sense, it almost feels like a callback to the ‘I'm shit and I couldn't do anything but be a Beatle (and ride Paul's boat)’ quote. Which is heartbreaking. I wish he could've recognized his own genius.

But yeah either way it's enough to make your heart heavy. If anyone needs a good cry, just go to the last five minutes of this. That should've been the now and then music video, but Paul's too scared of feelings. Which. You know. Considering how much it affects me, I can't even imagine how much it affects him. So he gets a pass.

“Why must we be alone? It's real love. It's real.”

[enemiestolovershoe]

Hiiii i love your writting so much and i would love if you could write a noah X reader inspired by the song 7 minutes in hell by chrissy costanza

Seven Minutes In Hell

Noah Sebastian x Reader

Warnings: Toxic relationship, Intense emotional manipulation, Arguments and fighting, Emotional whiplash, Dark themes of obsession and unhealthy attachment, sexual content (no smut)

Words: 1.2k

A/N: Thank you so much anon! 💕

Disclaimer: While the characters in this story are inspired by real people, the events and interactions are purely fictional and not reflective of reality.

"Oh my god, do angels ever fall this hard?"

Your hands were shaking. Not from fear—no, not that. From frustration, from rage, from the overwhelming need to scream until your lungs burned.

But you didn’t.

Because you were too busy staring at him, at the mess of a man standing in front of you, his brown eyes burning with the same anger you felt twisting inside you.

Noah fucking Sebastian.

Your greatest mistake.

Your greatest obsession.

Your greatest sin.

And yet, even now, after everything, you couldn’t stop. Couldn’t walk away. Couldn’t breathe without him even if being with him felt like suffocating.

You slammed your phone onto the counter, jaw clenched so tightly it hurt. “Why the fuck do I always have to find out from someone else?”

Noah scoffed, running a hand through his hair. “Here we go again.”

“No, seriously,” you snapped, stepping forward. “Why do I always have to hear about your bullshit secondhand?”

“I don’t owe you a fucking explanation,” he shot back, voice dripping with irritation. “You wanna know something? Maybe stop listening to everyone else and ask me first.”

You let out a humorless laugh, shaking your head. “Right. Because you’re such an honest guy, huh?”

He clenched his jaw, muscles tensing. “Don’t do that.”

“Do what?” you sneered. “Call you out on your bullshit?”

His hand slammed against the wall, inches from your head, his body caging yours in. “You wanna act like I’m the only one who’s fucked up?” His breath was hot against your skin, his tone low, dangerous. “Like you’re not just as bad?”

The worst part was that he was right.

"The devil dancing in the dark, I kinda like it in his arms."

And maybe that was the problem.

Because even now, even after all the screaming, the accusations, the nights spent wondering why the fuck you stayed. Hispresence still set your skin on fire. His anger still made your pulse race.

You should’ve shoved him away. Should’ve left him standing there in his stupid black hoodie, with his stupid, messy hair and his stupid, intoxicating gaze.

But you didn’t.

Because you never did.

"Come my way."

His lips were on yours before you could stop him, his hands gripping your waist with bruising force. You gasped against his mouth, but it wasn’t in protest.

It never was.

His teeth dragged against your lower lip, and you whimpered—pathetic and needy. His grip tightened, and you let him have you. Because that was what you did. You gave and he took and you never once thought to stop him.

Because you didn’t want him to.

"When you kiss me, I can feel fire within me. Heaven’s got me burning. Yeah, you got me playing seven minutes in hell."

His mouth left a scorching trail down your neck, his breath heavy, ragged. “You drive me fucking insane.”

You dug your nails into his shoulders, letting him press you harder against the wall. “Good.”

"Touch me, bringing me down to my knees."

And you did. Over and over again. Because this was the only way you two knew how to communicate—through touches that burned, through gasps that replaced apologies, through passion that should’ve never been mistaken for love. 

But it always was.

"Love the taste of sinning."

You hated yourself for this. For craving him even when you swore you never would again. For wanting him even when his voice still rang in your head, sharp and cruel from the last fight.

But you weren’t the only one.

Because Noah was just as fucked.

Noah’s POV

"Close your eyes. I’m gonna be your favorite vice. Forbidden from your paradise. You wanna take a little bite."

She looked like a fucking angel—eyes dark with anger, lips swollen from his kisses, skin burning under his touch.

And he wanted to ruin her.

No, he already had.

“You think you’re so fucking innocent?” he muttered against her lips, hands gripping her thighs. “Like you’re not just as twisted as me?”

She exhaled sharply, her nails dragging against his scalp, a mix of anger and need in her eyes. “Shut up, Noah.”

A smirk pulled at his lips. “Make me.”

And she did.

"Close the door. Oh, drop your halo to the floor. No, you don’t need it anymore. I’ll never leave you needing it anymore."

Her hands were trembling, but not with fear. No, it was something else entirely. Something dangerous. Something that matched the fire in his own veins.

And he wanted to ruin her with it.

“You always come back,” he whispered, brushing a strand of hair from her face.

She exhaled sharply. “And you never let me go.”

Noah smirked, tilting her chin up. “You don’t want me to.”

And maybe she didn’t. Maybe that was the problem. She was his. Even if she hated it, even if she hated him. Shebelonged to him. Just like he fucking belonged to her.

It was a curse.

A disease.

And neither of them wanted the cure.

"When you kiss me, I can feel fire within me. Heaven’s got me burning. Yeah, you got me playing seven minutes in hell."

She gasped into his mouth and he groaned, his hands fisting in her hair. The way she tasted—like whiskey and bad decisions, like something he couldn’t quit. He was drowning in her, lost in the way she gasped against his lips, in the way her body curved against his like she was made to fit him.

He was supposed to be the devil in this story, but God, she felt like heaven.

And that terrified him.

Didn’t want to quit.

Would never quit.

"Touch me, bringing me down to my knees."

His mouth ghosted over her jaw, down her neck, lower, lower. Her fingers twisting in his hair as he dropped to his knees in between her legs.

Because that was how it always ended. With them tangled in sheets, out of breath, drenched in sin and sweat, pretending the world outside didn’t exist.

Until it did.

Until the cycle started all over again.

Until the fire consumed them both.

Readers POV

The sheets were tangled around your legs, your body still humming from the aftermath. But the peace didn’t last. It never did.

Because the second you opened your mouth, the spell shattered.

“Noah,” you whispered.

He didn’t move.

You hesitated, then reached for him, fingers grazing his back. “What the fuck are we doing?”

Noah let out a sharp exhale, running a hand through his hair. “Burning.”

You swallowed hard. “And when there’s nothing left?”

Silence.

Then, finally, he turned to you, eyes darker than you’d ever seen them.

"Why do I feel heaven on your skin? When I wanna be your eighth deadly sin?"

He leaned in, lips hovering over yours, voice so quiet you almost didn’t hear it.

“There’s always something left.”

And maybe that was the worst part.

Because no matter how much it burned, no matter how much it hurt—You’d both keep coming back for more.

Taglist: @alwaysfightforwhoyouare @courta13 @Lacy1986 @chey-h

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