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#because what pissed her off the most was nobody ever thinking that maybe she needed something
cyberfunsupporter · 28 days
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people want aubrey to be this soulless gang leader so bad sometimes tbh and i can tell. like the mean friend. instead of caring and fun. yes she went through some serious shit and (outwardly, at least) detested her original friend group — but she didn’t like. lose her emotions in the process? or at least like u know the empathy. the kindness. that’s actually kind of the point. she pretends like she did and she doesn’t care because she’s protecting herself. everyone always says she’s so angry and like. ur so close to the point actually. she IS angry. cause she feels things and she’s hurt. and she also still feels like she wants to be kind. and she wants to be friends with them again. and she wants to have friends in general. just cause she’s mad at the way everybody handled mari’s death and can’t stand them cause of that during the course of the game doesn’t mean that she isn’t capable of like. having friends and being kind and being a good friend to others. it’s actually kinda funny to assume everything w the hooligans is just mean cause like. aubrey’s 16 lol. those people are all like 14-17. her and her friends are regular people, and they’re all FRIENDS. they don’t just follow aubrey cause she’s like badass and angry or something. they’re all close + look up to her or whatever because she’s their friend. angel always wants to show aubrey his new dance moves . that’s because she always wants to see them! she cares about what angel likes even when kel and sunny and everybody else thinks he’s a loser. the maverick freaks out when she won’t leave her house because he cares about her and he wants her to be happy… because she’s his friend and she cares about HIM. and vance is concerned because kim’s upset, kim likes aubrey, and vance likes what kim likes. he’s gotten pretty close with aubrey too because he cares. aubrey cares too. she cares about kim a lot (she has a photo of her by her bedside table!) and so she cares about vance a lot too because kim and vance are really close as siblings so of course they’re all close!!! and charlie’s so concerned she even speaks because she cares for aubrey. aubrey cares for charlie. the kind of concern the hooligans were feeling when aubrey wasn’t okay just proves how much she really brings to the friend group and how much she really matters to them. they care for her BC SHE CARES FOR THEM and she’s a GOOD FRIEND!!! she is a kind person and a good friend! you don’t really see much of it because the game’s all about sunny and kel ends up being sunny’s best friend in the rw (and because of this, headspace as well) cause everything’s so fucked up with everybody. and kel’s just so irritated because he can’t understand aubrey, so i guess it’s easy to see her as just this mean person if you don’t really look past all of that, but she’s not. she’s really not. she misses everybody. she’s kind to others. she wants peace. and she’s genuinely trying to be better she just can’t figure out HOW because nobody’s giving her the grace of listening or even attempting to understand because she doesn’t fit what they deem “normal” or like, the easy version of depressed like sunny or hero where they just rotted. no, she’s complex and her emotions are all over the place because she also had and has other shit going on that nobody cared to learn about. and yet she’s still trying! that’s what she does the whole game! that’s what she did for 4 years when nobody cared to look! even longer than that too, hanging out w the faraway gang when her dad left and her mom was an alcoholic and neglectful. just cause she doesn’t handle things the way everybody else does (she has abandonment issues and anger problems and complicated emotions cough cough bpd what who said that) doesn’t mean she like. ever stops being kind. or ever stops possessing the ability to be a good friend. you just have to look honestly.
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trulyhblue · 8 months
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If you write for her, I will not be opposed to a Kerstin Casparij one because I have the biggest fattest crush on her. Maybe a fan keeps showing up in the fanzone (an area of the Joie stadium where a selected few are allowed to meet the players, but it's random each time and should make it so its different every time so everyone gets a go.) And nobody knows why she's there or how she keeps getting chosen but the players find it funny and make sure to get round to her every time. But Kerstin always spends a particularly long amount of time with her, until it's revealed that she's pulling strings and getting the girl in every time just so she can see her. (You can either do it where she does it because she likes her or because they're dating, it works with both and I'm not sure which one I want more.)
Charmer
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Kerstin Casparji x Reader, Lauren Hemp x Platonic! Reader, Esme Morgan x Platonic! Reader, Man City WT x Reader.
Warnings: fluff, coarse language, established secret relationship
A/N — Thank you for this request!! Love it so much. Will definitely write more for Kerstin if anyone is willing to send in some requests!!!!!
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You had met Kerstin in a bakery down the road from your house. When you first saw each other, the woman nearly tripped over her own feet. You were surprised by the shock on her face like she was starstruck by being in a metre of your presence. You gave her a friendly smile, hoping your open ambiguity would keep things humble.
It was during your final exams, the ones where you needed to pass so that you could continue your degree. You were very passionate about what you did, and sitting down in a quiet coffee shop with your headphones on and books open was your idea of being productive.
Kerstin, on the other hand, had the impression that you didn't want to talk to her.
Which, well, to be honest, you were in the middle of studying, but you gave no clear indication of what she thought you were thinking.
Instead of going about her day — she should've been at training twelve minutes ago, but it was only media day so they could wait — she slowly sauntered closer to where you sat, pretending to be interested in the decorative flowers that embellished the cafe. You watched her out of the corner of your eye, smiling at her piss-poor attempt in remaining discreet.
You were dressed in very basic clothing, similar to hers save for the Manchester symbol embedded on her jumper. Only one ear was covered by your headphones, meaning that Kerstin would be heard loud and clear if she plucked up the courage to speak to you — which she was trying to do now. She thought you were the most beautiful woman she’d ever seen, and she was surrounded by women almost every single day of her life. You looked extremely immersed in what you were doing, which should of been an indicator of apathy but it only lured Kerstin in more.
She wanted to know everything about you. Your name, you favourite colour, what you did, what you loved, who you loved—
It sounded a bit creepy, so she shook off her thoughts and focused deeply on the flowers. The woman was staring at her screen distantly, aimlessly typing away on the keyboard with a mug by her side.
When she realised you had caught her staring, she buried and swallowed down her pride. “They are nice flowers, don't you think?” She asked, her cheeks burning a vibrant red as if she had just run a marathon. You noticed her accent, one that wasn't accustomed to Manchester, and nodded like you cared about the topic.
“Yes, but I think they are fake.” You replied, smiling wider as the woman’s flustered state only grew in size when she caught sight of the very fake-looking plants.
“Oh.” She gulped, shoving her hands into her pockets. She's so stupid, she thought to herself, she’d blown her chance of even talking to this gorgeous stranger by talking about some stupid, fake plants.
You wondered whether the woman would continue the conversation she started, but the silence that followed was a pretty good indicator that she was audibly stumped on what to say.
“They are pretty, though.”
“Like you,” Kerstin spoke without thinking and instantly regretted it. She slapped her hand across her mouth, nearly walking out of the coffee shop, packing her bags and moving back to the Netherlands. “Fuck, sorry. That just— erm, came out. Sorry.”
You took off your headphones, pretending to act offended, raising your eyebrows and sighing. “You don't mean it?”
“What— no, no, you are so pretty. Like, beautiful, gorgeous. That's why I'm here. Well— yeah, I saw and thought you were pretty. I didn't mean it like that. You're probably smart, too, but— erm, yeah.”
The look of remorse almost made you feel bad, but your amusement — and somewhat endearment — overturned your hesitancy.
Instead, you laughed, took a sip of your drink and smiled, hoping it would calm the woman’s nerves.
“You worry too much.” You said, moving across the booth you were sitting on, offering the space beside you for her to sit down. She did so without delay. “I'm not someone you should waste your worry on.”
“You are the most beautiful woman I have ever seen,” Kerstin answered wholeheartedly, pleased when she noticed the blush that dusted your cheeks. “I would rather worry about you than anything else for the rest of my life.”
You laughed, crossing your arms over your chest. “You don't even know me.”
With a push of confidence, Kerstin wrapped an arm over the back of the booth, scarcely missing your shoulder. “If you’d let me, I’d like to.”
“Charmer.”
It was from there that you and Kristen started to hang out.
Seven months had passed, and you were now completely and utterly in love with the woman. Kerstin was an externally affectionate person despite her introverted persona. She loved showering you with compliments, giving you everything you needed at exactly the right time with just the right amount of love and devotion.
You found out she was a football player pretty early on in your relationship due to the tight and busy schedule the girl had, including her diet, exercise, and all of that. You weren't a massive football fan, but going to your first game a week into knowing Kerstin made it seem to find a way into your heart.
Your girlfriend wasn't the only one to give compliments. You had your fair share in making sure the Dutch woman knew how much you were enamoured with everything she did. It took you a while to get used to her career and the publicity that came with it, but you found pleasure in knowing that once you got back to your shared apartment you could tell and show her just how much she made you feel so so proud.
It was in mutual agreeance that you both wanted to keep your relationship under wraps. Your feelings for one another and how you cared for each other were one of the highest concerns in your relationship, and by keeping your love between yourselves, you've found that it worked better overall. You didn't want to indulge in a media presence, and Kerstin respected that.
Kerstin was fine with putting herself out onto social media, but when it came to you, she wanted to make sure you were comfortable at all times.
Because of this, you both came to the decision that at games, you wouldn't sit within the family and friends section, and instead, in the crowd with the fans.
You were among the group of fans that were guaranteed to meet the players after the match, whether it be cause they paid more or if they were chosen randomly by officials. For many weeks, people just assumed that they were lucky or could just afford to pay the extra money to be seated in the same section. Both you and Kerstin found it amusing when fans would wonder why you were always the first one to be greeted, or why you knew her.
After a month of this recurring theme, some of Kerstin’s teammates started to notice.
Surprisingly, Lauren, who wasn't the most observant, caught sight of it first.
“Do you know her?” She asked Kerstin after a game against Everton, watching the Dutchie make eye contact with you from where they were signing shirts.
Kerstin looked at Hempo, a blush running across the bridge of her nose.
Shrugging, she thanked the last fan, handing back the pen. “She's a friend of mine.”
Lauren’s eyebrows furrowed. “Then why isn't she in the friends and family section?”
When Kerstin didn't instantly reply, silenced by the prodding questions she was receiving, a distant idea clicked in Lauren’s mind.
“She's your girlfriend?” She sounded, obviously a little too loudly since the Dutch international nudged her warningly.
“Alright, nosey, keep your voice down.” She snapped, pulling the girl away from the crowd. “You can't tell anyone, alright. It's still pretty new.”
Lauren’s eyes widened in alarm, not exactly thrilled with the commitment of keeping a secret. “Does Jill know?”
“Why would Jill know?”
“I don't know, I didn't think I’d be the first person to find out,” Hempo replied, looking back at you. “Can I tell someone?”
Kerstin’s eyebrows furrowed. “I just said you can't.”
“Yes, I know, but I'm terrible at keeping secrets,” Lauren whined. “Please, let me tell Jill, at least.”
“No, because Jill will tell Viv and Viv will tell Beth, and Beth will tell literally everyone.” She quipped, only half-heartedly digging at the Arsenal girls. She watched Hemp sigh like a child, looking down as if the burden of her knowing was too much. “You can tell Esme but that's it.”
That was how the first people found out about you and Kerstin. When she told you that night, you weren't necessarily fazed. It was bound to come out at some point, and you’d rather Kerstin’s teammates find out from her than the internet.
Unfortunately, though, the rest of the girls weren't afforded the same luxury as Esme and Lauren.
All of the girls at Man City couldn't believe their eyes when they found out Kerstin was in love.
Well, to be fair, they weren't quite certain this was true. Lauren and Esme saw it first at the next game against West Ham, watching their teammate smile cheekily at the girl in the stands when she should've been stretching.
Sandy mentioned the Dutch International’s love-sick countenance to some of their teammates over lunch a few weeks later, promoting Hempo and Es to spill their not-so-long-kept confession.
None of the girls knew who Kerstin was talking to — or even if their suspicions were acclimated, but Sandy, Esme, and Lauren all made it their mission to keep their lips closed.
Sandy was the one to come up with the pact, yet the demanding eyes of Roebuck after an endurance training session set her tongue loose.
Lauren wasn't at all happy. Esme ended up spilling the secret to Mary as well, meaning the secret was already spreading across the team.
Meanwhile, fans were growing more and more suspicious of you and how you managed to steal the attention of Kerstin after each and every game.
The media surrounding you two got so big that Kerstin’s national teammate Viv called her one day asking what was going on.
Kerstin knew Lauren and Esme had told at least half the team by then, including Jill, who had run up to you after a game and pretended to flirt with you just to annoy her teammate. Viv was quick to point out that if she wanted to keep your relationship private, putting you in the midst of cameras and media attention wasn't the most suitable option.
You ended up deciding that if you were to stay in the crowd, both of you needed to be willing to make your relationship more public.
It had been seven months of concealing your obvious love for one another. Pretty much the whole team knew about you, and it only took fans a quick video of the two of you looking at each other to piece the clues together. You were both mature enough to keep your private lives private and social lives up to your discretion.
You made the decision to share very minimal parts of your lives together without spelling it out. This meant that you could hug your girlfriend for that little while longer in front of everyone. You could kiss her and not look around to see if anyone was looking. You could tell yourself that Kerstin was yours and you were hers.
But you didn't need public knowledge to make you feel loved by her.
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kerstincasparji
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kerstincasparji — bit of a charmer ✨
Comments:
user11 — UM THE SOFT LAUNCH ARE YOU KIDDING???
viviannemiedema — ❤️
laurenhemp — love that bakery
*liked by kerstincasparji and yourusername
esmemorgan — busy girls
^ wosofan — SHE KNOWS
maryfowler — 🐐
user23 — is she dating the fan??
^ manchestergirl — if you mean the girl in the stand then yeah I think so
^ user2 — “THE girl IN THE STANDS” AHAHAHHAA
jillroord — ew cooties
^ viviannemiedema — shush
^ jillroord — no 😍
user7 — why does she sit in the stands and not in the family and friends section
^ laurenhemp — that's what I said 🫢
yourusername — charmer, huh?
^ kerstincasparji — idk, some pretty girl called me it
^ yourusername — didn't you call her beautiful, gorgeous, stunning, talented, incredible, out of this world
^ kerstincaslarji — she likes to think so.
^ user12 — IS THIS HER??????
^ arsenalwosoxx — THEY HIT THE PENTAGON
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samkerrworshipper · 11 months
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Heyy, would you be able to do a quick Alexia Putellas and Lia Wälti where Alexia comforts her after the match (maybe with smut or something cute and wholesome)? The match yesterday and X has convinced me that they’d make such a good looking couple oof 😅 thanks!
captains connection
lia wälti x alexia putellas
let’s pretend that the game happened in spain and lia got injured because i needed some pain and injury contenttttt
warnings: smut at the end, pain, injury
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Lia was walking down the tunnel. Never in her life had she felt so fucking affected by a reporter, but today it had just been too much. Sure, she knew that her team stood no chance against the Spaniards, but there was a chunk of hope, a slither of faith in her team that maybe they would come close, give them a run for their money. A 1-7 loss was hardly anything to call giving Spain a run for their money. They were just too good, too quick, too fast, too good for Lia to even contend against. It drilled a hole in her heart that she didn’t know existed. Lia was used to losing, but this one hurt so much harder for her and she couldn’t even comprehend why.
“Lia! Walti, wait up a sec.”
Lia pivoted directly on her bare heel, she was tired and sore and wanted nothing more than to take a quick shower and go back to her hotel, finding safety in the unfaimiliar blankets and sheets of the uncomfortable bed. She was pissed off, and definitely not in the headspace to be talking with anybody, especially another reporter or journalist, her tolerance was completely non existent.
So when she was met with Alexia Putellas running after her, there was nothing she wanted to do more than turn around and waltz as far away as she could get. Who was she to run away from Alexia Putellas? Nobody would do that if they were right in the head. Lia paused from her spot in the tunnel, stopping so Alexia had the opportunity to catch up to her. Lia leant herself against the wall, her body was beginning to catch up with her and the 90 minutes of play were starting to set in.
“What do you need Putellas?”
Lia’s words held more malice than she hoped they would, but she couldn’t refrain, she was too tired and sore to try and entertain a friendly captains chat. Alexia deepened her frown towards Lia, the sparkly glint that had occupied the midfielders eyes fading quickly.
“I just wanted to make sure you were okay, that tussle you had with Salma was pretty rough.”
Lia frowned, she’d never had to experience this kind of encounter after a game, normally captains stuck to their own sides, especially after a thrashing like Lia had just enjured.
“I’m fine.”
When Lia thought about it, she really wasn’t fine, she was fairly certain the 19 year old had managed to crack a rib or two, the purple bruises up and down her torso evidence of just how hard she’d run into her in a fight for the ball. Salma had come out victorious, leaving Lia in her dust, rolling around on the pitch in pure agony. She refused to be taken off by the medical staff though, she wasn’t going to let her girls lose so drastically without her there to pick up the pieces.
“Are you sure, because Salma seemed pretty worried, said that she’d heard a crack.”
Lia hated this, hated the faux sympathy that was falling so easily from Alexia’s lips.
“I’m fine, what are you even doing here? Shouldn’t you be out celebrating?”
Alexia’s frowned deepened at the clear anger that was behind alias words, sure, her and the Swedish captain had hardly ever interacted, but she still felt obligated to be friendly, Lia did not share this courtesy with her.
“No, I think most of the girls are just heading back to the hotel for an early night, I wanted to make sure you were doing alright though, you seemed like you were having a rough time on the pitch.”
Alexia wasn’t exactly wrong, after the collision Lia had been in a lot of pain, it was harder to breathe, harder to do everything. It still hurt to hear the words leave Alexia’s mouth though, Lia just hadn’t been good enough.
“I guess when you win so much there’s no need to celebrate.”
Lia’s words came out as a murmur, a quiet breath that Alexia only just managed to pick up on.
“Nobody wants to celebrate a 7-1 win.”
There it was, the reminder of just how much Lia had managed to fail in one night, 7 times, 7 crucial times.
“Yes well it must be real hard being the best in the world.”
Alexia took a deep breath out, it was clear the Swiss was angry, she couldn’t really blame her, Alexia remembered the time before Spain was at the top, when they too were the little fish and it had sucked, it was never fun being the underdog.
“You’re only as good as your last game.”
Lia was getting sick of this, sick of the bull shit that was interacting with the Spanish captain.
“Alexia, what do you need, you clearly came here for something and as much as I love a social session, I’m not really in the mood.”
Everything about the dynamic was messing with Lia, why was the Catalan here, in front of her, instead of celebrating with her team.
“I wanted to make sure you were okay.”
Lia plastered a sardonic smile to her face, it was so fake it almost made her feel sick.
“Well I’m alive, so feel free to leave.”
Lia’s hand came up to point towards the other end of the tunnel, the end where she could hear music gently thudding against the concrete floor.
“Is it a Swiss thing to be so dismissive?”
Alexia’s tone was curious, she was trying her very hardest to decipher the swiss woman, but it was proving to be harder than she thought.
“It’s a loser thing to not really want to interact with your opponent that just thrashed you.”
Alexis snickered a little bit at your attempt at sarcasm, it was sadder than anything.
“Fair enough.”
Instead of walking away, like Lia expected her too, Alexia stayed in front of her, her eyes roaming across Lia’s body which was still leant against the wall, her only support to stop her from toppling over.
“Alexia, what are you doing here?”
Lia’s voice was more vulnerable then it had been all day, the exhaustion finally overtaking the defensive barriers she’d had up, breaking them right down.
“I wanted to make sure you were okay, to look after you if you weren’t, because I figured that you’d be too busy helping the other girls to even give a moment to think about yourself.”
Lia’s breath caught in her throat for a second, because realistically what was she supposed to say to that?
“I’m fine, my girls are fine, it’s my job to look after them, that’s what we sign up for, isn’t it?”
Lia figured that Alexia probably hadn’t had to pick up the pieces for a little while, she played for Spain and Barcelona, the two best teams in the world currently, there was no losing for them, no hard games, no suffering.
“It’s also your job to look after the whole team, including yourself, the girls will be fine, they’ll survive without you, what matters is that you are okay, mentally and physically.”
Alexia have Lia a small smile, a little quirk of her lips that made Lia feel like she was under a microscope.
“I’m fine Alexia.”
Lia didn’t even really convince herself, her breaths were becoming more laboured by the minute and she felt like shit.
“It would be okay if you weren’t.”
The next thing Lia knew, Alexia was cocking her head, and for some reason nothing was making sense anymore. Alexia’s face, her lips, her arms seemed so perfect, so inviting, everything that Lia craved. Lia wasn’t thinking straight, if the thoughts about it, she was thinking gay, very fuck gay. That was the joke that played in her head as she leant in shamelessly, her arms wrapping their way around Alexia’a shoulders as she moved her lean onto her body from the wall. Alexia’s lips were as soft as they looked, like pillows below Lia’s. It took Lia a total of three seconds before her brain kicked in, and she was pushing herself out of Alexia’s arms, the shame and shock setting in from what she’d just done.
Alexis just stood in front of her, smirking a little bit to herself as the Swiss captain’s face drained in embarrassment from her impulse.
“Fuck, I am so sorry, I wasn’t thinking, I’m going to head back to the change rooms now, the bus will be leaving soon, I’m so sorry.”
Lia’s voice was so terrified, terrified of the lack of self control she had. She just couldn’t contain herself, not when Alexia looked so fucking hot, with her very faint pink hair dye and with her Jersey and rustled up from the tough game. She was irresistible, insatiable, everything thing Lia was so deprived of right now.
Alexia’s hand around Lias wrist stopped her from scurrying away.
“I said I would look after you, if that’s what you need then my arms are open.”
Lia’s heart dropped, her feet forcing her to twist around to look at the Spaniard. Lias eyes searched Alexia’s face, looking for any signs that she was joking, that she was fucking around with Lia. When Lia found none her gut dropped to her ankle. It almost would have been better if Alexia had been joking, at least she could play it all off as a joke, forget that this whole encounter had never happened, but Alexia held no sarcasm or intent behind her eyes, just soft contentedness.
“I don’t want to be a bother, I can sort myself out.”
Alexia rolled her eyes at Lia’s refusal.
“Nonsense, you are very welcome, it’s up to you bebita, you come with me and I promise that I’ll look after you tjough, better than whatever you’ll manage in a shitty hotel room.”
Lia didn’t need to know Spanish to assume the meaning of the pet name that Alexia had sent her way, it made her face blush bright red involuntarily.
“I really don’t want to be a bother.”
Alexia shook her head, rubbing her thumb against the inside of Lia’s palm.
“Lia, you won’t be a bother whatsoever.”
Lia frowned to herself, because she felt like a fucking bother, like she was weighing down everyone around her.
“C’mon, your coming with me, you need somebody right now.”
Alexia didn’t gave Lia a few seconds to pull her hand away, but when she didn’t Alexia just started to pull her down the hallway, closer to the Spanish change rooms.
When the pair made it to the door, Lia stopped in her tracks, looking cautiously at Alexia, this was uncharted territory.
“I can stay out here.”
Alexia shook her head, pushing the door open wihh the one hand and tugging Lia in with the other.
“You’re very welcome, you are among friends.”
Everyone turned around when Alexia entered the room, Lia readied herself for some kind of hate, or dig at her team, but it never came, Alexia’s teammates acknolwedging the two of them before going back to whatever they’d previously been occupied with. Alexis walked Lia over to her cubby, sitting Lia down on the bench in front of it, a soft smile on her lips.
“I need to have a quick shower, you can stay or come join me, it’s your decision.”
Lia was terrified of sitting in the room by herself, or without Alexia there to protect her, but she also didn’t want to intrude on Alexia’s privacy.
“I don’t want to intrude.”
There were so many cautions with Lia, so many ifs and buts, this whole situation was so new to her and she was still struggling to work out how exactly she’d gotten here in the first place.
“I wouldn’t have given you the option if you weren’t welcome Lia, it’s about what your comfortable with. Shower or not I’m still going to look after you when we make it back to the hotel, but it’s your decision.”
Lia had become aware of the cold sweat that was plastered to her skin, and it was making her uncomfortable, uncomfortable enough for it to be a reason for her to take Alexia up on her offer. There was also so much doubt in her mind, and a little bit of fear about being vulnerable in this space, more vulnerable than she was already feeling.
“You won’t be mad if I stay out here?”
Alexia smiled at Lia, shaking her head.
“No cariño, absolutely not, just give me two minutes and i’ll be right back alright. If you need anything don’t be scared to ask, you know Jenni right, the one sitting over there, if you need anything just ask her, sí, I’ll be back before you know it.”
Lia nodded deftly, it was hard not to know who Jenni Hermoso was after the World Cup, considering her face had been plastered everywhere for weeks now. Lia knew that even if she was stabbed though right now, she’d probably not ask them for help, she felt uncomfortable enough being in a room of Spanish players when she was the only one wearing a Swiss jersey, suddenly feeling very self conscious sitting in her playing uniform.
Alexis grabbed her things for the shower, jetting off towards the other side of the rooms, leaving Lia all to herself. She stayed in her spot, a little scared to move even slightly. She stayed that way for a few minutes, just staring into space and keeping herself occupied as she internally went over the game in her brain, what she could have done better, whag she could have done to help her teammates. It was a tedious process, one that she could force herself to go through for hours.
It wasn’t until a certain Spaniard obstructed her vision that her eyes darted up from their spot on the floor.
It wasn’t Alexia, that was the big let down, instead Lia was met with the sight of Salma Paraluello, the Spanish powerhouse who was the cause of the bruises all up and down her ribs.
“Your Lia right, I’m so sorry about what happened-.”
Lia shook Salma off with a quick smile and the raise of her hand.
“Kid don’t worr, it’s part of the job, no bad blood, you did what you had to to get the ball, I’m fine.”
Lia remembered when she was as young as Salma, when she two had been absolutely petrified of everything and anything, the anxiety radiating from Salma felt far to familiar to Lia.
“If your sure you’re okay, it sounded pretty nasty.”
Lia couldn’t argue with that, she’d heard the loud crack that her ribs had made as Salma had connected with torso, it wasn’t a sound any athlete ever wanted to hear.
“I’m fine, I’ve had far worse, don’t worry about old me.”
Salma nodded quickly, smiling one last time at Lia before going back to wherever she’d come from. Lia missed being that young, when she didn’t have a care in the world, when all she was expected to do was turn up. Now there was so much more expectations for her, expectations to perform, expectations for her team tk perform, expectations that she felt like she was constantly falling short too.
She wasn’t left to her own devices for very long, Alexia returning not long afterwards, blonde hair damp and resting on her shoulders. She’d changed, into a simple pair of grey sweatpants and a red hoodie.
“Let’s get you out of your kit, hermosa?”
Lia suddenly became far more aware of the fact that she was still sitting in her smelly and sweaty uniform. She didn’t have a change of clothes though, there had been a spare hoodie in her bag, but that had been left behind in the swiss locker rooms.
Her internal worry was solved though by Alexia reaching out and offering her some spare clothes, a plain black hoodie that had a little Spanish emblem on it, and some matching sweat pants that brandished Alexia’s number 11 on the front.
“Okay.”
Lia took a deep breath, reaching for the hem of her jersey and pulling it over her head. She reached for the hoodie that was in Alexia’s hands, but Alexia pulled the hoodie away, her eyes focused on Lia’s ribs. Lia had tried her very hardest not to look, but with Alexia’s gaze directly on her body it was hard not to. She was a little bit scared at the sight, there was purple all up and down her ribs, deep, dark, purple.
“Hermosa.”
Alexia’s voice was thready, the shock evident as she continued to access Lia’s stomach and chest.
“It’s nothing, I’m fine.”
Lia grabbed the hoodie, very quickly throwing it over her head before Alexia had a chance to survey any more. Lia slipped her shorts off quickly, before pulling the sweatpants up and over her ass and standing up, level with Alexia, whose jaw was clenched and eyebrows were knitted together on her forehead.
“My cars here, so if you feel comfortable with it we can go back to my house?”
Lia wishes she was brave enough to say no, brave enough to say that she was comfortable enough to lie to Alexia’s face and say that she was fine to be alone right now. But she was desperately seeking out something, anything that the Spanish captain could give her.
“Yes, please, if it’s no trouble.”
Alexia just smiles and nods her head, reaching behind Lia to pick up her bag and then tugging Lia along with her towards the door. She said a quick goodbye to her teammates before walking Lia and herself out of the rooms and back into the tunnel. Alexia did all the work getting her and Lia into the car, opening the car door, getting Lia sat in the passenger seat and buckled in. Lia was on a different planet, her brain fading into places that it had never been.
Alexia began driving, watching Lia with a close eye.
“How come you didn’t tell me you were in so much pain? Those ribs look broken.”
Lia sat up in her seat a little bit with Alexia’s words, the Catalan’s voice awakening her from her haze for a second.
“It’s fine.”
Alexia frowned to herself, Lia was so quick to dismiss her own pain, it made Alexia even gladder that she’d convinced Lia to let her look after her.
“You don’t have to pretend with me, captain to captain, I know how easy it is to hide an injury for the good of your team.”
Alexia knew what Lia was feeling, she’d felt it herself multiple times, it was human, Alexia had been in the same position as Lia a multitude of times, the one thing she’d missed was someone there to guide her, someone there to tell her that it was okay for her to feel this way. Sure, Lia might have been a year older then Alexia, Lia might have been a captain for far longer than Alexia, but Lia had never had someone there to support her, Alexia had Jenni and Irene, she had people there helping her, Lia had nobody.
“I couldn’t leave them out there, it was hard enough during the game, somebody needed to be there after the game to pick up the pieces.”
Alexia knew the closer they got to her house the closer her and Lia were to encountering a different obstacle, which was vulnerability.
“You don’t always have to be that person, sure, you're the captain, but it isn’t your job to always make sure that everyone is okay, not immediately after a game.”
Lia didn’t really believe that statement, if she couldn’t perform enough on the field to get a win and she didn’t support her team then what even was her purpose?
“I know what my job is, I’ve been doing it for four years, I know my team and I know my capabilities.”
It was a lie, Lia was fairly certain that never in her life had she felt like she was more of a stranger to her teammates, she tried her hardest, but recently everything had felt so much harder, football, relationships, everything. Since the break up with Caitlin she’d felt like a skeleton, a half version of who she’d previously been.
“I never said you didn’t.”
Lia wished she was at home, back in her apartment in London, hiding under the covers on her bed instead of whatever this was.
Just when Alexia was fairly certain that the tension between the two of them couldn’t thicken any much more, they pulled into her driveway. Alexia let her eyes dart over to Lia, who was sat stock still in her seat, staring directly in front of her at Alexia’s door.
“C’mon Walti, I want to get some ice on those ribs.”
Alexia pinched Lia’s elbow, an action that seemed to snap her out of her trance, enough for her to reach for her seatbelt and open her door.
Alexia struggled with the key for a few seconds, before it finally went in correctly and Alexia’s door sprung open, to reveal a fluff ball of a dog at Lia’s feet.
“That’s Nala, she’s harmless, why don’t you go and get yourself settled on the couch and I’ll find some ice and something to drink.”
Lia just nodded, walking through Alexia’s hallway like it wasn’t a completely new place to her. It wasn’t hard to find the lounge room, she just walked the rest of the way through the entry hallway and was met with an open lounge room/kitchen floor plan. Lia gravitated straight to Alexia’s couch, plopping herself down onto it. What she hadn’t anticipated was the shooting pain that radiated directly from her ribs as she pounced on the couch. It was a kind of pain that Lia hadn’t felt in a long time, like she’d just been punched in the ribs.
It took her a little bit of jostling to find a position that didn’t hurt, but when she did she relaxed into the plush everything felt a bit better.
Alexia returned quickly, a ice pack and drink bottle in hand.
“Can you take the hoodie off, just so I can have a proper look?”
Lia really didn’t want to, but she knew if she said no in some roundabout way she would end up doing it anyway, so she saved herself the labour and reached for the hem of the hoodie, tugging it up and over her head, revealing her blackened stomach. It wasn’t a pretty sight, it even made Lia internally recoil a little bit.
Alexia sat down on the couch beside her, her hands gently grazing over Lia’s skin. It was almost sensual how good Alexia’s cold hands felt, her calloused hands trailing across Lia’s ribs tracing imaginary lines like she was writing a map. Lia tried her hardest not to wince when Alexia’s fingers prodded at the pinnacle point of her pain, but the debilitating shock that was sent across her body was too much not to groan. Alexia’s hand retracted almost immediately, her eyes looking up to meet Lia’s, a deep frown on her face.
“Their cracked, I’ve done my ribs before, nothing you can do about it, it just hurts for a few weeks.”
Lia couldn’t take her eyes off of Alexia, her eyes raking up and down Alexia’s body as she took the Spaniard in. She was in close enough proximity now to truly breathe her in, she smelt like citrus and strawberry soap. It made Lia’s scent receptors tingle, the appeal deep in Lia’s body. Lia followed Alexia’s eyes, down to her chest, where they were pinned. Lia’s nipples were pebbled, easily visible through her sports bra. Normally, she’d be ashamed, but Alexia was looking at Lia like she was the sun, like she was unworldly, and it did wonders to Lia’s confidence, and the rapidly growing pool between her legs.
When Alexia realised she was being watched she pulled her eyes from Lia’s body immediately, a little bit ashamed at the lack of control she had. Now was Lia’s opportunity to be confident, to show the Catalan that her eyes and glances were the only thing keeping Lia sane right now.
Lia reached her eyes up to Alexia’s chin, forcing the Spaniard to look at her.
“Like something you see?”
Alexia flushed at Lia’s insinuation, but she didn’t make any attempts to deny, just bit down on her lip meekly.
“You're injured.”
It was a matter of fact statement, and one of the only reasons that Alexia was yet to jump on Lia.
“We can take it slow, be gentle.”
Lia needed a distraction, needed something to make her feel less invalid.
“What about Williamson?”
Lia queried her brow at Alexia, curious of what it was that the Spaniard was referencing.
“Leah? There’s nothing serious happening between us, we’ve both just recently fallen out of love with the people we thought were our everything. She’s like me crutch, we have casual sex, we’re fuck buddies, but nothing more, it’s more just a bond formed from heart break, there’s nothing exclusive about it.”
Alexia had run out of reasons, she didn’t feel comfortable fucking a taken woman, but with the revelation about Lia’s relationship she suddenly felt far less obligated to put a stop to the dirty thoughts that were circulating her brain.
“Drink some of that water.”
Alexia lowered herself to the floor, gently, her body still aching a little bit from the game. She moved to the gap between your knees, edging them further apart, all whilst you watched her.
“I’m serious Walti, no fun for you until I see you drink some of that.”
Lia rolled her eyes, picking up the drink bottle that Alexia had set down beside her, taking a few sips to appease the captain, and also so Alexia could get on with it. As Lia took sips, Alexia tasked herself with pulling down her sweatpants that she’d lent Lia and tugging them off so they pooled on the floor. Once Lia had set the water bottle down, Alexia reached up for the panties. Lia involuntarily lifted her hips, the pure desire thrumming through her veins being enough to fuel her.
“You want this?”
Alexia was looking directly at Lia’s glistening sex, she was beautiful, her clit peeking out from her folds, her hole leaking liquid desire. Suddenly, words were coiled at Lia’s throat, the desperation coming out in choken words, her body desperately wanting more than the cold air.
“Please Ale.”
Lia arched her back as Alexia’s bot mouth connected with her, her hips rolling directly into Alexia’s mouth, her body desperately searching for more contact, more anything. One of Alexia’s hands came up to rest on Lia’s hips, a warning, stopping her from moving. Alexia’s thumb rubbed rough marks into Lia’s hip bones, but she didn’t care, not in the slightest, not when Alexia’s mouth felt so impeccable. Lia’s breath hitched as Alexia’s mouth moved down from sucking on Lia’s clit to her hole, gently testing it out by thrusting her tongue into Lia’s mouth. It was pure pleasure, Alexia’s hands forcing Lia’s legs further open, as far as they would go, so she had complete access to Lia’s sex. She moved back up to Lia’s clit, nibbling on the sensitive nub but didn’t leave Lia’s hole lonely for very long, a single digit replacing her tongue. Lia was a goner as soon as Alexia started to thrust the single finger in and out, Lia’s hips grining haphazardly down onto Alexia’s face and fingers. She was a groaning, moaning mess, her stomach and pussy tightening and clenching down on Alexia’s fingers.
It was perfect, until the tightness in Lia’s stomach was too much, to sore, to bad. She winced once and i was enough to have Alexia’s head and fingers removing themselves from her body, Alexia’s head craning upwards to see what was wrong.
“I’m fine, my ribs are just cramping, don’t stop, feels so fucking good.”
Alexia wasn’t content with Lia’s reassurance.
She got herself up from the floor, rising from her knees and shaking out her legs.
“Ale, please, if you don’t help me then it’s going to be your shower head.”
Alexia smirked to herself, keeping note for later in the night.
“Hermosa, don’t fret, we’re moving to the bed, at least there you can ly down and the angle isn’t as intense.”
Alexia reached down, pulling Lia up to rest on her hip, and walking straight into Alexia’s bedroom.
Alexia didn’t fuck around, she returned back to her task with vigour and urgency that Lia didn’t know she had, this time two fingers thrusting in and out of Lia’s hole and Alexia’s tongue going back and forth between soft, broad kitten licks that spread from her lips to her clit, to intense sucking and nibbling directed straight at Lia’s sensitive bundle of nerves.
It didn’t take long for Lia to get to the edge, Alexia’s curving fingers finding the toe curling spot inside of Lia’s walls that was so insatiably perfect.
“Fuck, fuck, Ale, going to cum, can I cum? Please, been your good girl.”
Alexia smirked into Lia’s pussy, licking up whatever wetness she could find. She suddenly increased her face, nibbling down onto Lia’s nerves and thrusting her fingers in a wild pace, it only made Lia clench down on her hand harder, Lia’s body's response to her actions leading her to believe that Lia was right on the edge.
“Cum for me Lia, be a good girl and cum all over my face.”
It was enough to send Lia tumbling over the line into starry goodness, a soul shattering orgasm wracking her body, causing her to spasm on the mattress and grind down further on Alexia’s face as her body rode out the pleasurable wave that was her release. Alexia coaxed her through it gently, lapping at Lia’s hole and lips as she slowly came back down to earth. Once Lia’s body had stopped trembling, Alexia crawled up from between her legs, joining Lia on the pillows, smiling lopsidedly at her.
She leant in tentatively, Lia met her half way, getting to enjoy the experience of tasting herself on the Alexia Putellas’ tongue. It was ecstasy, pure magic, something that Lia never thought she’d experience. Suddenly though, Lia felt conscious, what if Alexia expected something in return and she couldn’t give it? As their kiss deepend, Lia reached her hand down to the waist band of Alexia’s sweatpants, but Alexia’s hand caught her wirst before it could go any further down.
“Tonight about looking after you.”
“But I want to help you.”
Alexia smiled into the kiss, it was often she was in this kind of situation.
“How about I give you two more, and if you feel up to it after that then I’ll let you eat me out, hmm?”
Lia nodded eagerly, a big smile opening on her face as she pushed her tongue against Alexia’s lips, the Spaniard granting access.
Alexia woke up how she did most mornings, the sound of rain pattering against her roof, light filtering in through the curtains, the birds chirping outside. She leant over to the space beside her, a space that when she’d last been awake had been warm and filled with the presence of a certain Swiss captain who had been nothing short of perfection all night. When she was met with cold nothingness her eyes cracked open fully, a deep frown developing on her face. The covers were pulled back, and all of Lia’s clothes from the previous night had disappeared from Alexia’s bedroom floor. Before Alexia knew what she was doing, she was springing out of bed, as naked as she was the day she was born and walking into her kitchen, to find a similar sense of nothingness. Her heart dropped with the realistion that Lia was gone, without a note, without a phone number, without anything. Lia was hurt, in so many ways and Alexia understood that, she understood that Lia had been vulnerable with her, and maybe she wasn’t ready to face that vulnerability in the daylight, where everything hurt more, everything was so much more real.
Her frown didn’t faze as she made her way back to bed, with the realisation that when she crawled under the sheets she no longer had a companion, it was just her, all by herself. Lia was in a similar predicament, lying in a hotel room all by herself, trying her very hardest to forget about the way that she’d felt so infatuated with Alexia. Captains like them didn’t have time for romance or sweet little moments, they had countries to lead, people they were responsible for. Lia would go back to London, back to Arsenal, she would be better, when she needed some love she’d utilise Leah for a night and then she’d go back to being the fearless leader that she had to be.
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milaisreading · 1 year
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Hello! It’s my first time ever requesting in tumblr and i really really love your works! I was wondering if you could do a scenario about manager who’s bad at playing soccer and players ( u-20/BLLK/neo-egoist…) got into argument about who will teach her xd
Author: Hello! Happy to hear that I am your first request and I hope you like this! Thank you for the support and have a great day🩷
Warnings ⚠️: Reader uses she/her. Requests are open
⚽️Blue lock belongs to:Muneyuki Kaneshiro and Yusuke Nomura⚽️
"Come on, (Y/n)! It will be fun!" Bachira urged the girl, who simply shook her head, looking at the football he was holding in disgust, then nervously laughed.
"I... I don't think that's a good idea..."
"Why? Come on, we will go easy on you!" Isagi said, wanting to play football with her. It was a relatively peaceful day at Blue Lock anyways, aside from Kaiser pissing Isagi and Rin off, it was peaceful.
"That's not a good idea because..." (Y/n) gulped, a little embarrassed to admit she was downright horrendous at the sport.
'They will probably make fun of me for it!'
"Come on! Just relax for the day." Kunigami and Chigiri urged. (Y/n) looked around the place nervously, trying to find some saving grace. Most of the Blue Lock members were in their room, using today as a rest day. The ones who were here: Isagi, Kunigami, Bachira, Chigiri, Reo and Nagi were essentially trying to get her to play with them. Rin was out with his brother somewhere, while Kaiser and Ness were with their team, so there was nobody she could use as a scapegoat... well, except...
'Fuck my life!' She cringed and looked over at the U-20 captain.
"Aiku said he might need my help with... something! What was it again?!"
Oliver looked at the girl, startled that she even addressed him. The others were in disbelief too, knowing that (Y/n) didn't have the best of relationship with him, but she was now looking at him like he hung up the moon.
"What dream is this?" Bachira muttered and pinched his cheeks.
Oliver watched with a raised eyebrow as she escaped Nagi's grip and ran to him.
"So... ready for me to help you with that... thing?" (Y/n) asked the dumbfounded captain, who recovered pretty fast and nodded his head.
"Of course, come on."
Oliver smiled and pulled (Y/n) along, sending the group a smirk as they were glaring at him.
Once gone, Bachira kicked the ball in rage and grinned at the door.
"When did he get so close to (Y/n)? Didn't we keep him away from her?"
"Apparently not good enough... Why my dear (Y/n), why pick that hobo over me?" Reo sobbed as Nagi cracked his knuckles.
"We should have beat him up instead of playing bowling." The albino said.
"Maybe... maybe (Y/n) would rather play football with him instead of us..." Isagi whispered, hurt and panic lacing his tone.
"What?! This is a tragedy, I am way better than that womanizer freak! Why?!" Chigiri cried out.
"You all... do you think that (Y/n) might have a thing for Aiku? I mean... did you see the way she looked at him?" Nagi questioned, causing everyone to look at him in horror.
"Nonono... she hates him. I am sure we just saw shit." Kunigami protested the idea, there is no way their sweet manager would like him.
"Well... you know what they say... the line between love and hate is thin." Isagi gulped, causing silence to fall on the group.
"Why are you guys so down?" Rin raised his eyebrow as him and Sae approached the panicked group.
"(Y/n) wants to marry Aiku and play football with him!" Bachira yelled, causing Sae to spit out his drink.
"The hell are you guys talking about?! Why would (Y/n) want to play with a lukewarm hobo?" Rin asked, already getting agitated.
"We tried to get her to play football with us, and she picked Aiku." Reo answered solemnly.
"You all are dumb, for 2 reasons. One that you think lukewarms such as yourselves are worthy of asking (Y/n) that." Rin started, ignoring the glares he received from his teammates, and then continued.
"And 2nd for believing (Y/n) would like Aiku."
"You didn't see the way she looked at him." Kunigami said.
"What do you mean by that?" Sae spoke up, already pissed at his teammate.
"She looked like he hung up the moon and stars... like he is a God or something." Chigiri explained.
'That little piece of shit!' Sae and Rin thought.
While the group was plotting Oliver's death, the captain himself was over the moon as he talked about thr various places he visited in Italy. (Y/n) would chime in with a question here and there, finding him surprisingly pleasant to talk to... well unless he tried to flirt. They were now in the training area designated for the U-20 team, with (Y/n) doing some check-ups on equipment.
"Say, why did you pick to hang out with me?" Oliver suddenly asked, causing (Y/n) to look away from her clipboard and at him.
"Oh... I'm... no reason!" She said as Oliver got up and moved closer to the girl.
"I don't believe you. Now tell me what it is about, Cutie?"
'Kill me, what are these nicknames?!' (Y/n) cringed and contemplated on if she should tell him or not.
"I am very much open and transparent with you, shouldn't you be the same? Seems only fair." Oliver said, leaning down.
"Rin, don't start a fight no- did you just bite me?!" Isagi flinched as him and Kunigami held back the two brothers from starting a fight. Nagi sighed and opened the door to the U-20 training hall, only to choke on his spit at the scene he was seeing.
"That piece of shit..."
"What is it?" Reo raised his eyebrow and peeked inside too, only to shriek away right after.
"What?" Chigiri and Bachira asked.
"Aiku is trying to kiss (Y/n)!" Reo exclaimed as the others froze for a moment.
"Nevermind about peace, I am beating him up first." Kunigami said, letting go of a seething Sae.
"No way, I will!" Bachira added, grinning maniacally as Nagi and Reo walked into the room, ready to pull their manager away.
"Ah... I just don't know how to play football... and I was too embarrassed to admit it." Nagi and Reo stopped in their tracks and looked at each other.
"Sorry for using you like this! I was just embarrassed to say anything... it sounds rediculous."
Oliver hummed and nodded his head, then put his arm around her shoulders and grinned.
"Then I will teach you the basics. What better way than to learn it from a captain-"
"Hold it! You are not teaching anyone anything!" Reo yelled, pulling (Y/n) away from Oliver and glared up at him.
"What are you guys doing here?!" (Y/n) asked, horrified that Reo and Nagi heard her.
"We came to get you! Don't listen to anything he tells you!" Reo said and pointed at the offended boy.
"Yeah, we can teach you how to play." Nagi yawned, sending a glare to Oliver.
"We? You mean me! I am the best ranked one in Blue Lock." Rin chimed in.
"Cut the crap! I can do a way better job!" Bachira said as he smiled at (Y/n).
"I am the fastest and most patient one of you all. Please, I will do that." Chigiri said calmly, earning an eyeroll from Isagi.
"Not as patient as I am."
'Good God... over football of all things.' (Y/n) groaned as she watched the group argue.
"Come on, let's do something else. Ego-san will hear the commotion soon." Reo whispered to (Y/n) and pulled her out of the training room, Nagi following them close behind, satisfied that the girl was away from Oliver, who was getting scolded by Sae and Rin.
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jcollinswrites · 22 days
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JC!!!
No you did not make a father/son RO choice 💀
I just saw this and ofcourse you did 🤣😭
It's gonna be me in Honor amongst thieves all over again.
Now i have to ask another two parter question:
Sorry, i know I'm annoying 😑
1. How would Namer's son actually feel about him dating an MC around their age?
And 2. Much more importantly.
TOTALLY HYPOTHETICAL!!!!!
Completely
I never do this....
Clearly!!!
But say you struggle to really choose between the ROs. And you kinda romance more than one....🫣
How would the ROs react to that? Are some of them very jealous? And who would have the most rivalry dynamic among the ROs if MC was interested in more than one RO.
Just for shits and giggles... i completely have no problem with this in every other game.........
Also hiiiiiii!!! 😇💕
No you did not make a father/son RO choice 💀 I just saw this and ofcourse you did 🤣😭
Huh? I did?
Oh wait. I did. Oops 😇 Could be father/daughter too 🙃
1. How would Namer's son actually feel about him dating an MC around their age?
Very weirded out. They would be uncomfortable around MC for a long time. I think they would need some years to get used to it. If MC is cool about it, then maybe sooner, but I don't think Ahmose could ever really be friends with that MC, not on a deeper level.
you struggle to really choose between the ROs. And you kinda romance more than one....🫣
I thought about this for a long time, and I came to the conclusion that I will do locked romance routes. Not because I don't like jealousy scenes (I love them), but I think I already have way too many variables in the story to be able to implement a who-dates-who/ break-up/get-together-again thing. It would just be too much to write and I'm already writing A LOT.
So, my current plan is to make a choice in Chapter 4 (up to change), where you choose your final RO and get stuck with it 'til the bitter end. I'm sorry if this disappoints some readers, but I think this is the best solution for me to be able to deliver a quality story.
How would the ROs react to that? Are some of them very jealous? And who would have the most rivalry dynamic among the ROs if MC was interested in more than one RO.
For the aforementioned reasons, this ask is not spoilery then, so here you go 😀
I think Narmer would be the most jealous lol. He would try not to show it, but he really wouldn't like it if MC suddenly starts showing interest in someone else. (ESPECIALLY if that other person is his kid, then he would be pissed off. Unless the MC is a teen. Then he would go YES go choose Ahmose you idiot)
Qenna would take that as an opportunity to push the MC towards the other, clearly better, more emotionally stable, not-a-trainwreck potential love interest. It would hurt them like a bitch, but they would still do it.
Zaia would sulk. They would be conflicted between wanting to prove that they are clearly better than that other nobody, but at the same time, Zaia would realize that MC would probably be better off with a fellow human.
Tabiry would be a bit jealous. But she also knows that the MC is a person with free will and a free heart, so she would try to up her game, but otherwise, wouldn't interfere. She would sulk in private.
Ahmose would be a bit heartbroken. I think they would just go for advice to Qenna, who is actually not the worst person to ask for advice, and Qenna would tell them to have confidence, be themselves, and let the MC choose what they want. (bit hypocritical, but that's Qenna in a nutshell)
Long ass answer lol, but thanks for the messages! ✨ (you are not annoying)
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hannahssimblr · 8 months
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In the final throes of summer the trees lose that brilliant, neon green and the waves crash to shore just a little harder than they did last week. It’s a small change, yet I see it every year as I stand on the shore, that breeze that blows the marram grasses into my bare legs is just a touch colder than usual, the days a little shorter, a feeling of change in the air. 
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I watch a mother call her kids in from the sea with a broad wave of her arm, “We’re packing up the caravan,” she’s calling out, “Come and help your dad put the cases in the car, won’t you?”
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Within sight of me, Liam wipes the counter down at the surf shack, and there is no queue today for ice cream, and soon it’ll be just the locals left, going about their year in this village of boarded up houses. He sees me and waves enthusiastically, and I lift a limp hand in response. 
“You off soon?” He shouts, and I shrug. 
“Tomorrow.”
“Ah, well sure I might see you around before you go. I’ll be here.”
I turn back to face the shore. Yeah. He’s always here. I wonder what it’s like for him when the summer is over, like, what does Liam do in the winter? Does he still go surfing? Does he still stand there smiling at the Surf Shack window, through rain and storms, smiling out to sea and waiting for customers like some kind of ancient ghost doomed to act out this routine until the end of time? How is it that he is fifteen and it feels like he’s been there for centuries.
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Shane Healy comes down the sandy path from the village and my stomach clenches. He is not smiling, and he’s walking towards me with a particular sort of impatient purpose that makes me feel like the most burdensome fool to ever exist. Who knows what I interrupted by asking him to come here, but I have a feeling he’s about to tell me. 
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“Here, man,” he huffs, “We were packing the bags to go home, what is it?”
I hesitate, aware of my hands sunken into pockets, thinking perhaps I should take them out and be prepared for any potential violence. “Um,” I say, “I thought that you and I should talk.”
“Oh yeah?” He has a glint in his eye. Is it a murderous glint? I can’t decide. 
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“I was talking to Jen about you guys, you know, not inviting me to hang out at your place the other night and I was just wondering-”
“Yeah, obviously. Why would I invite you over?”
“...Because we’re meant to be friends, I don’t know, why else would you-”
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“Man, look, I don’t know if you think I’m stupid or something, but obviously I found out what you’ve been saying about Kelly, and I don’t really think it’s a good idea for you to be in the same room as her, she’d just get mad or something, I don’t know.”
“Kelly?” I splutter. “What did I ever say about Kelly?”
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“I get pissed off at her, right? She’s annoying, but she’s my sister, and only I’m allowed to say things about her, not you. I dunno, I just thought you’d have a bit more cop-on, a bit more compassion or something, like, she’s been…” He hesitates, like the next thought is disturbing, “.... fairly upset about it, to be honest.”
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I search all over his face for some sign that he’s pranking me, but he isn’t. His jaw is set and his brow is furrowed. “Shane, honestly, I don’t even know what I said. I don’t think that I ever said anything about her.”
“Okay but it actually has to have been you.”
“What? Why? What was said?”
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“Man, come on, I know you’re like this, I know you just say and do shit without really thinking about it, and you’re an annoying bastard about it and usually it’s fine, but I’m just mad that you targeted my little sister. It’s not on.”
My heart is drumming a staccato beat inside my chest, “Shane, what the hell! I didn't say anything, I mean, maybe I did and I can’t remember. What-”
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“That nobody wants to hang out with her, that she’s a loser and that our mam has to force people to be friends with her,” He scowls, “All the teenagers at the caravan park heard about it and they’re all ripping the piss, saying that she needs mammy’s to hold her hand.”
“That wasn’t me. I’d never say that.”
“Well we figured out that it must have been, alright? Because mam said that she asked you, you specifically, to invite Kelly to hang out because she was worried she was feeling a bit lonely.”
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The idea that Shane’s mam thinks I spread these rumours makes me queasy. I remember that night. We were out on the dunes, we ran out of beer, I went back to the Healy’s mobile home to sneak more out, and Clóda came- 
Clóda. 
“No - listen, I swear it wasn’t me,” I begin, but he’s already finished and doesn’t really care about what else I have to say. He’s backing away. 
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“Whatever, Jude. If this is what you asked me here to talk about then I have things to be at, so,” he gives me a nod as I splutter in protest, but he just walks away with a curt wave, “I’ve to pack, so, see you next summer, or whatever.”
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“Shane, wait! Shane, man, c’mon!” He doesn’t turn around. “Fuck sake,” I mutter and I grab my phone from my pocket. I punch out a quick text to Clóda. 
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Meet me in the park when you’re finished work. 
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I stalk off in the other direction. 
Beginning // Prev // Next
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sometipsygnostalgic · 2 years
Text
“Love Day”, a catradora fanfic
I was apprehensive about posting this, because it is a personal gift for @phosphoricbomb​! 
But here is Love Day which is a fic that I wrote in her dms from the very random brain thoughts in my head on February 14th. 
It’s the first fic I’ve posted in many months and my silliest yet. Enjoy! 
Adora was drinking a coca cola, her favourite drink, in the Bright Moon kitchen area. She was banned from the kitchen area, after her first and final attempts at cooking dinner for everyone. But nobody was around right now, so she could drink as much coke as she needed and feel only mildly guilty about it!
Suddenly, with a loud SPARK, a wild Glimmer appeared.
"ADORA!!"
Adora yelped and dropped her coca cola glass on the floor, spraying both her and Glimmer, who would've probably been pissed off if she wasn't already so stressed.
Glimmer grabbed her arms. "Adora... I NEED your help!!! I haven't figured out what I'm going to do for Bow on Love Day!!"
"Love Day?" said Adora. "What the hell is Love Day?"
Glimmer narrowed her eyes at Adora. "The annual Etherian holiday where you show the person most special to you that you appreciate them, through exchange of cards and gifts?"
"Aaaa???" Adora was suddenly panicking too. "Oh no, what? Is that today?"
"YES!!"
"But I haven't got anything for Catra! She's going to think I'm a terrible girlfriend and leave me forever!"
Glimmer shook Adora. "You can't be having a crisis about not getting anything, I'm having a crisis about not getting anything! Just get her... like... a squeaky toy, or your old hoodie!  I need ideas for Bow!!!"
"Um. Get him, uhh.." Adora scratched her chin. "Get him a guitar pick or something."
"Musical instruments? Eh, maybe. Okay well you're shit out of luck, BYE ADORA!!!"
"WAIT NO GLIMMER YOU HAVE TO HELP ME TOO---"
And Glimmer teleported out of the room, leaving Adora alone, to figure out what to do for Catra!!! Adora rushed through her own things to see if there was anything she could give to Catra. Ahah - A SWORD!! Wait no. Was Catra interested in swords? Or was that just something Adora was interested in. But having a sword is the COOLEST thing ever. Or was it only cool to Adora? Would Catra think Adora got a gift for herself? Well it was literally one of her own swords, so was it just a handaway? AaaaaaH!!! Why is this so hard!!!
Adora also looked through her old hoodies. Sure, Catra nuzzled up against them every time she got the opportunity. But was it really fair to give it as a Love Day gift? How all out were you supposed to go for this? In the Horde, sure, being given someone's old clothes was a dream come true!!! Catra wore Adora's old uniforms ALL the time. But these hoodies were ALREADY covered in Catra's fur, and Adora suspected that Catra preferred to steal her hoodies rather than actually own them.
Adora made her way back to the kitchen area, wondering if Catra would instead want to make food, when she bumped into Frosta and Sea Hawk! Adora processed the scene in front of her. Sea Hawk was throwing coal into the oven, like he was trying to power a steam engine.
"More... MORE!!!" Frosta yelled. The oven was burning up a storm, the fire inside probably heating up way past its normal limits.
On top of it, Adora could see several chunks of large metal.  They were being heated up by the gas burner.
"Uhhh.... what... is happening here?" she asked. "Are you, are you supposed to use it like that?"
Frosta laughed maniacally. "We are making GUNS!!!!"
"That's right", Sea Hawk replied cheerfully. "Frosta is helping me make a sniper rifle for sweet Mermista! She always wanted to be a secret assassin, and what better gift than to make her dreams come true!!"
"So is that why you're filling the oven with coal?" Adora asked.
"It's so that the fire on the stove burns HOT ENOUGH to MELT the METAL," said Sea Hawk, "so we can make the gun!"
"You do realise that the temperature of the bottom part doesn't... power the stove, right?"
"Hmm? That's nonsense", said Sea Hawk. "This is CLEARLY where the fuel goes--- Oh dear---"
The oven was starting to MELT from the inside, droplets of metal and paint pouring onto the floor, while the metal chunks at the top had barely heated up at all!
"YESSSSS" cried Frosta. "MORE FIRE!!!"
Adora, not wanting to get Super Banned from the kitchen, ran away before the fire alarm went off. There was no way any advice from Sea Hawk was going to help her make a gift from Catra, especially if they weren't actually able to make any guns for her.
Adora, starting to feel hopeless, wandered into the basement area. How was she going to explain things to Catra? "Sorry Catra, I found out Love Day existed like 5 minutes ago so I got you nothing, here's a hug!"?? She couldn't even make Catra some certified Fake Ration Biscuits now! She was CERTAIN that Catra was going to open another portal as soon as she realised Adora hadn't even thought to gift her anything.
She stepped on something--- and it YELPED, and scratched her leg! Actually no, it didn't scratch her leg, it deliberately drew a taser and gave her a quick zippity zap.
"Ouch!!"
She realised that what she had stepped on was a small robot kitten, which wandered away into the newly built Bright Moon Lab of Robots and Awesome Science, aka, BRIMOLRAS, which was a stupid name, but she wasn't going to argue with  Entrapta.
Adora entered the lab, and saw Scorpia talking to Entrapta animatedly, while she focused intensely on something.
".....so she told me that I looked really pretty in the earrings, and I said 'Thanks, they belonged to my aunt!', and she said 'I hope I can meet your aunt one day', and I said 'That's too bad, because she was murdered by the Horde 30 years ago!!', and I don't know why but that really killed the mood, but anyway, that's why I wanted to give her some earrings too. They're awesome right?"
Scorpia held up the earrings, which were warped copper rings that had incredibly ameteur attempts at what appeared to be wooden scorpions attached to them. One of the scorpions appeared to have a blob on its head and was smiling happily in the way you'd see in a small child's drawing. The other had a spiky head, and was a bit larger, but unfortunately its tail appeared to have snapped off.
Entrapta raised an eyebrow, before smiling. "I think Perfuma will wear them every day :D"
Hmm. Maybe Entrapta and Scorpia could help Adora sort something out for Catra?
The robot cat meowed loudly, and the pair looked up at Adora. "Hey," Adora started, "could I have help with--" The cat meowed loudly again. "Making a gift---" MEOW!!!
"SHUSH, CHEESOID" said Entrapta. "Sorry Adora, she gets like this when she doesnt have Electrical Robo Snacks. Scorpia could you feed some to her?"
"Oh - Got it!!!" Scorpia replied, upright and happily grabbing a thing. It dispensed glowing smaller thingies which the robot cat preyed upon like it was starving to death. Scorpia cooed over it and patted its head, and the cat hissed at her. This didn't stop her gooey eyes at "Cheesoid".
Adora coughed. "Anyway---"
"Are you here because you need help making a gift for Catra for Love Day because you didn't know it existed until just now?" said Entrapta, hair hand pointing up and a smirk on her face.
Adora was stunned but only for a moment because she was used to this bullshit from Entrapta. "Okay, yes."
"That's okay," said Entrapta. "At least four other people have approached me today with the same issue! Thirteen minutes ago, I was helping Glimmer repaint her gift for Bow. Then she warned me not to help Sea Hawk make any guns! I haven't spoken to Sea Hawk yet but I'm 50/50 on whether I will help him make guns."
"I don't know what I can give her :(" said Adora. "I've known Catra for so long, but... we only got together, a couple of months ago." She sat down on a nearby table, shoving aside a couple of grenades to make room.  "I want to make Catra feel important, like she is special to me. How can I do that if I won't even do anything on LOVE day of all things? And, maybe she'll be okay with it, but.... I won't be. I'm not fine with knowing I let her down." Adora sighed, and stared at the floor.
...A tendril of hair patted her on the head gently. "There there!"
Then Adora dared to look up, teary eyed, and saw Scorpia staring straight into her soul with the most sappy, almost tearful expression! "Ahh!!" Adora yelped. "Eye contact!!!"
She fell backwards off the chair, knocking over the grenades. Fortunately Entrapta caught them all, and had room to also catch Adora, pushing her back onto the table, where Scorpia gripped her arms determinedly.
"You care so much about Catra!!" Scorpia yelled.  "I'm so... You're so sweet!!" She started bawling and hugged Adora very hard. "I'm so... I'm sorry, I just have so many feelings right now! I used to feel the same way, but you know her so much better than I do. You're made for each other Q_Q" Scorpia continued crying, and Adora tried to resume breathing. Entrapta stopped what she was doing for a moment, rotating her chair and looking at them both.
"Maybe you can't think of anything to give Catra, because neither of you know what she likes yet?" she said. "I know that Scorpia and Hordak thought they hated kim chi stew, but the first time they tried it, they asked for it every night. Even with me cooking!"
Adora huffed, insofar as it was possible while being hug crushed. "We just... we've barely been able to do anything, I don't even know who I am anymore... I guess I'm still learning who Catra has become, what she likes."
"It's going to take a while", said Entrapta. "Fortunately, I ALREADY KNOW what Catra likes!!!"
Entrapta spinned on her chair and took out a couple of charts. Entrapta was able to maintain so many charts and make so many things in a short time that Adora was wondering if she was living in a parallel plane where time was slowed down.
"See, it says right here.... Catra likes the colours black and red, dangerous new weapons, and cuddling Adora. Underlined in three black lines. She REALLY LIKES cuddling Adora."
Adora blushed. "Wait does this mean a hug is a viable gift then?"
"After doing much research, I've concluded Love day is less about materials... and more about spending time with the people you care about!!! But a hug tends to be a free offering."  Entrapta was rotating slowly on the chair and Adora tried to turn with her so she could see the chart, and was getting dizzy. "Catra likes some material things, and some immaterial things. She loves Melog, who as a cat companion, is both cuddly AND a friend. But maybe she would like something that represents Adora directly, when Adora is not there? Or at least something to remind her of you." This talk was starting to break Adora's brain. Cuddly, a friend, and would remind her of Adora..? She watched the robot cat purring on the floor, Entrapta patting it on the head once again. Its grumpy deeanour reminded her of Catra and Melog. The difference is, the cat wasn't very fluffy, and wasn't that down for cuddles--
"AHAH!!!" A flash of inspiration went through Adora. "I got it!!!" She pried her way out of Scorpia's arms using She ra strength. Scorpia sniffed and wiped her nose. "Alright Entrapta", Adora continued, "Can I borrow... uhh.... some material, some sewing needles, and any amount of fluff you might have?"
"Oh the sewing needles are over there next to the chainsaw", said Entrapta. "But I'm all out of fluff and material, you can steal it from Glimmer's secret pillow armory."
"Great, THANKS." Adora ran out of the room, and then back in again. "By the way is that thing you're working on for Hordak?"
Entrapta looked up from where she had started welding again. "For Hordak? Oh, no. This is my own power suit. I haven't got anything for---" She snapped the mask up. "WAIT!!! I forgot to finish Hordak's gift!!! I only have two hours!" She grabbed Scorpia. "Please help. If I don't get Hordak a gift for Love Day, he'll be so sad---" Adora couldn't stay and hear Entrapta resolve her crisis, for she had work to do. She found Glimmer's secret Pillow Armory, which everyone stole pillows from regularly because they were the softest fluffiest pillows, and got to work!!!
Two hours later, everyone came together at dinner... which was a takeaway for Sea Hawk reasons... and began sharing their Love Day gifts.
Micah went first. He placed a bouquet of flowers in the middle of the table, Angella's favourite. Castaspella and Glimmer hugged him.
It was silent for a while. Then Netossa launched something at Spinerella with her net!!! Spinerella looked up and narrowed her eyes. "A code for Sea of Thieves? Really?" "Hell yes, said Netossa. "We haven't played together since your Xbox Gold expired. Season 7 is SOOO much better Spinny, we're going to sink so many people!"
Bow coughed nervously, bringing out his gift for Glimmer. "I got you... a new cloak?" 
It had a sparkly under layer like Glimmer's current cloak, but it was much warmer, with a fuzzy white collar sewed onto it. It was magnificient, the colours of the galaxy. Glimmer looked so... happy, almost tearfully, and teleported to Bow, hugging him instantly. "Oh-- I got you something too!" she said bashfully. Then Glimmer pulled out.... a SHIELD!!! It was wrapped in a bow. And it had Bow's face printed on it with a wink, in his own art. That was probably the secret work Entrapta helped with but while Adora was autistic she still knew it was a bad idea to tell the world how last minute Glimmer's gift idea was. "It's your SUPER HERO shield", said Glimmer. So... you're safe, while you're protecting people  🥺 ” And then he kissed her on the top of the head, and she hugged him. Hey Tippen, I DO write Glimbow sometimes! The gift giving continued. Swift Wind got a pair of sunglasses for Castaspella, which fit her well somehow. Adora didn't think they were dating but it wouldn't entirely surprise her.
Inexplicably, Sea Hawk gave Mermista a gun. It was a sniper rifle as promised. Mermista blushed, and looked away, muttering something before gifting Sea Hawk a small box, which he stared at with such wonder as he opened it. He didn't share what it was it with the group.
Scorpia gifted Perfuma the little earrings. Perfuma looked SO happy, but she didn't put them on. Then she gave Scorpia a medium sized box, which Scorpia opened. "Wow..." she said, "This is so..." She took something out. "This is Scorpion Sensitive Soap... I thought it didn't exist anymore! And here are a pair of fuzzy gloves and one for my tail--" She took out the gloves and put them on immediately, even though it was really warm. Scorpia looked fuzzier than ever.  "I.. You're the BEST, Perfuma!!" And then the pair cried very loudly and everyone smiled, and talked a bit more loudly as things continued. Hordak looked a bit downtrodden as Entrapta wasn't here yet, but she showed up suddenly, running around the corner. "I'M SORRY I'M LATE" she said, "I WAS STILL WORKING ON IT!!!" And then she dropped a fucking engine onto the table. Hordak's eyes went wide.
"This..." he said, "This is the engine from my designs to upgrade the starship..." "Yep!!" she grinned. "But.. we thought we couldn't stabilize the plutonium crystals necessary for the catalyst..." "All sorted!!!" He stared at her, in disbelief, then pulled something out of his pocket. Entrapta gasped. "Is that a data crystal?" "I heard it's Etherian tradition to give your partners a part of yourself. This necklace... is a response to the one that you gave me long ago." (A/N: It was less than a year ago.) Entrapta had an unreadable expression as she tried to plant the blue crystal in her chest, then remembered she didn't have a power suit on, and placed it around her neck. "Wanted..."
They hugged, it was nice. Tipsy Adora thought it was very cute that Entrapta and Hordak seemed to have found someone who understands them. Catra had been watching events unfold while seated next to Adora, and grabbed her hand, stroking softly. Adora was flustered, and nervous as hell, but now she realised it was time.
She turned around and faced Catra.  And was stunned. She stared at Catra's beautiful face for about sixteen seconds before Catra stammered. "Uh. Hi Adora!" she said, tail flicking and a smirk on her face, amused and intimidated by Adora's behaviour.
Adora blinked. "H... Hi Catra."
Glimmer rolled her eyes. "Disaster lesbians." Spinny and netossa nodded in agreement. Entrapta was counting the seconds, verbally, that it took for Adora to continue. Scorpia was holding her breath, which couldn't be healthy. Bow was just gazing with his Bow face like he was going to start crying and hugging everyone again, which is happening a lot in this fic, but that's what you get when you're gay and sappy and writing a valentines day crack fic for your girlfriend.
"Mm-hmm!" Adora coughed. "So. Catra. I... I've known you for a very long time... and we've changed a lot over the course of that time... and I guess..." Adora sighed. "I guess, I'm starting to realise, I'm still learning about you. And now we've escaped the Horde, now we have ROOM to enjoy life... I have such a hard time figuring out what it is you like, or what even I like! Which is scary... but at the sametime.... kind of exciting. "
Catra's eyes were dilated and her tail had moved around her legs. Adora continued.
"I think, I know enough about you.... to say that for whatever reason, you like me. And I like you. So I thought maybe you'd appreciate it if you had something, that made you think of me."
She blushed and revealed, from behind.... a golden retriever toy! Or at least, that is what it was supposed to be. Some parts of its fur were less fluffy than others and its eyes were mismatched, but they were blue buttons, with black and white dots pained on them. It was so very cuddly and kind of fat. "I know it's not really useful like some other people's gifts... and you haven't asked for a cuddly toy... but I thought, you should know it's made with a lot of love."
Catra took the toy, and Adora waited for her reaction. She wondered if Catra was going to divorce her for such a shoddy gift, especially compared to Mermista's gun and Hordak's radioactive engine that he and Entrapta were now taking out of the room after much begging from Bow.
Catra laughed. She fucking laughed! But after a few seconds of wishing she was dead, Adora realised that Catra was crying. It was a happy laugh. Catra gave adora a hug, kissed her on the cheek, and talked in her ear. "You dummy. Of course you don't know what I want. I never tell you!!!"
Catra drew away, while Adora was enchanted. Catra was smiling peacefully, but then realised she was surrouned by people, and was blushing and looking away a lot like Mermista, as she took out Adora's gift. It was wrapped in several pieces of newspaper and tape.
"Here", she said. "Take it before I change my mind."
Adora unwrapped the gift... it was...... A cuddly cat. No, not just any cat - A Catra! It was a small cuddly Catra, on all fours with cartoonish proportions, like a very chibi Cat. Some parts of the fur were off colour - it seemed Glimmer's Pillow Armory had seen a lot of theft as of late - and it was slightly smaller than Adora's Adoretriever. But it was so funny. Adora giggled, she couldn't help herself, and Catra smiled.
"I thought the exact same thing", said Catra. "Now I'm with you forever whether you like it or not."
She picked Adora up, then realised Adora was too heavy to pick up, so Adora picked her up instead, and they kissed and hugged.
Why did Catra always have to be so cute?
The end!
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And this is the fanart I drew to accompany it :)
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6, 11, and 19- UHHHHHH any of them that vibes these questions! <:"Dc
afternoon lori!! thank you for the ask :D
6. Who will they take advice from, no matter what it is? Who won’t they take advice from, no matter what it is?
Caine-
taking advice: chen. without a doubt its chen. caine would question him or argue if they dont understand why hes giving the advice he does, but at the end of the day, he trusts that chen has his reasons, and that those reasons make sense.
refusing advice: hmmm,,, significantly harder to answer tbh. caine is pretty accepting of a lot of avenues of information. maybe hollow ground? so far hes been extremely suspicious of the kingpin, Especially after almost getting threaded. either that or regina, but would she even survive long enough to give them advice???? shes the only person so far they actually want revenge against.
Cyrus-
taking advice: anathema. too bad hes dead. nobody to stop cyrus now.
refusing advice: id say chen, purely for "fuck him, he wouldnt piss on me if i was burning" reasons. hed be way too suspicious of any 'advice' chen gives to act on it.
Cecilia-
taking advice: ceci doesnt exactly do advice. more like suggestions. most of them come from ortega, not because she particularly trusts him but because most of his suggestions tend to be fun. ofc she also turned down therapy so like ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
refusing advice: daniel. for extremely petty reasons. even deciding to stay at his place was an idea she came up with, not him. danny has no Idea how much of a pain shes going to be now that theyre rooming together.
Cynthia-
taking advice: hollow ground. #justthreadedtingz😍🤪
refusing advice: the funny thing about cynthia is that she cares for the people shes close to, she just doesnt trust them, so this applies to a lot of people. definitely ortega because thats probably the messiest divorce i ever did see, but also dr mortum, because she doesnt think she would understand the situation shes in enough to give advice even if their relationship Doesnt completely fall apart when the puppet thing is revealed.
11. They’ve won the lottery. Spend, or save?
Caine- nothing really to spend it on. save, unless theres something he really wants to get his hands on.
Cyrus- could be useful in the future. save.
Cecilia- depends, does she still have her funds from thievery? if no, spend. if yes, pretend to spend it by showing off things she already owns to throw people off her track, then save it. or spend if theres something mundane she wants.
Cynthia- doesnt really like having big sums of money lying around. spend it on villain work.
19. Do they study before tests? Practice before job interviews?
Caine- i mean. does going into a rabbit hole of tangentially relevant information a week before count? not for job interviews though. they couldnt care enough about that.
Cyrus- duh. hes the person somebody would go to if they need notes or extra tutoring.
Cecilia- no, but if she cared about tests enough shed be a top student, and she usually manages to fly by on job interviews because shes pretty charming.
Cynthia- yes, but for school its because the subjects are interesting to her, while the job interview is for general "i want to get the job" reasons.
questions from here!
#once again i am obsessed with chen and caines dynamic with trust#but to elaborate a little more while sparing the rant#caine trusts chen enough to argue with him because they want to understand his perspective#theyd do a lot for him but he wants to know /why/ first- he doesnt want to act blindly for the sake of following orders#which is more than what i could say for some of their other relationships#if i had to say somebody alive for the “who would cyrus get advice from” question itd be dr mortum#hes smart+one of cyrus best friends+doesnt have any annoying moral hangups to get in the way of giving good advice#theres just a small little hangup of dr mortum getting extremely pissed at him for letting argentine get hurt but you know im sure its fine#OKAY BUT TO BE FAIR TO CYNTHIA#EVEN IF SHE WASNT THREADED#AS LONG AS SHE GOT THE PROTECTED STATUS SHED BE THE MOST WILLING TO LISTEN TO HOLLOW GROUND#potential big sibling???? who seems to care enough about her to protect her from their own mind???? who cynthia doesnt have to worry about-#-a big bad secret destroying their relationship over????? are you fucking kidding sign her up#hollow ground couldve had it All if they hadnt fucked it up first meeting by threading her#now its just a matter of time before that explodes in their face Again#something i find really interesting is that cynthia kinda. underestimates ortega and dr mortum? but not in terms of their abilities#more in what they would accept and understand. like she doesnt think they could ever really Get the things shes done yk?#which is why she keeps lying to them#all of my steps are already well-off to wealthy but still choose to live Like That (coughcainecough)#anyway! thank you again for the ask lori!#caine lynzal#cyrus becker#cecilia rider#cynthia garcia#sidestep#fhr#pulp answers#ask game
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ashyblondwaves · 1 year
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Jancy + “god, we’ve been together for ages! I didn’t think that borrowing a change of clothes would warrant this much attention.” Please!
Better Than Bacon Grease
Pairing: Jonathan Byers/Nancy Wheeler Rating: T Words: 707
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GIF by @share-the-damn-bed
"I can't go out like this."
Jonathan stood at the foot of Nancy's bed; arms spread wide as Nancy giggled at his misfortune.
"It's not funny!" Jonathan bellowed, throwing his head back in frustration. "All because I had to dump out the bacon grease."
"And missing the canister completely," Nancy reminded him with another laugh.
"Come on, Nancy," Jonathan whined. "It looks like I pissed myself."
It would be the last time Jonathan tried to cook at the Wheeler's house. The cooking part went fine, perfectly even. He showed up at the Wheeler's house early and made breakfast for Nancy, Holly and Karen while Ted and Mike were off setting up for the block party that afternoon.
Conversation was light, breakfast was delicious and all that had to be done was clean up. But what is usually a coffee canister, at least at his house, the container the Wheeler's used to hold bacon grease had a lid far too small for pouring grease in it and as Jonathan tried to pour, he got it everywhere but the container, including his shirt and the front of his pants, right at the crotch.
"You were supposed to use the funnel!" Nancy said, shaking her head.
"Who uses a funnel to pour out bacon grease?!"
"We do!"
Jonathan sighed, running a hand through his hair.
"I have to go home a change," he said with finality.
"We don't have time for you to go home," Nancy reminded him. "We have to be at the block party in twenty minutes."
"We can be a little late," Jonathan said.
"Not when you're the photographer for the event, we can't!"
"What am I supposed to do?! Walk around smelling like a diner trash can all day?"
Nancy fell silent, chewing on her bottom lip. She looked down, a sly smile playing on her lips.
"What?" Jonathan asked.
"You can wear some of my clothes," she offered.
"Nancy."
"What? I have some oversized clothes you can try on."
What else was he supposed to do? He was not going to walk around full of grease all day.
"Fine. What do you have?" Jonathan finally said with a groan.
It wasn't bad. It really wasn't. Maybe a little tight. Maybe a little short, but it was better than wearing bacon grease all day.
The lavender Emerson t-shirt clung to Jonathan's lanky frame. Every time he raised his arms to bring his camera to his eye the shirt would ride up to his belly button.
Better than bacon grease.
The shorts left little to the imagination, black track shorts with white striping around the edges. They hugged places that would be considered indecent exposure in most states. But everything stayed covered, and nothing moved out of place. He just had to be careful when he bent down to snap a photo.
Better than bacon grease.
But the looks. The looks he was getting were making him uncomfortable, the center of attention. Long gazes that lingered on parts of him people had no right staring at. He just wanted to walk around and take pictures of the event like he was asked. He did need all eyes on his outfit.
But still. Better than bacon grease.
"God, we’ve been together for ages! I didn’t think that borrowing a change of clothes would warrant this much attention," Nancy laughed as she gave a tentative wave to Mike and the rest of the kids.
"I just don't think they're used to seeing the man wear the woman's clothes," Jonathan grumbled, pulling at the tight t-shirt and releasing the fabric with a snap.
"Well, that's sexist!" Nancy barked. "You have every right to wear my clothes, just like I wear yours. Nobody ever gives me looks when I wear your shirts."
"Probably because they fit you."
"Not the point."
"I think that's exactly the point. I probably look like I escaped from the insane asylum."
"Wouldn't be too farfetched," Nancy quipped.
"Har har har," Jonathan deadpanned. "Let's go get some pictures of the kids in the bounce house."
They walked together hand in hand, as everyone's eyes immediately went to Jonathan's outfit. A few people snickered, some gasped, but despite all that. It was better than bacon grease.
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shrekyaoi · 17 days
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The inner circle having a DND podcast like critical role
you may think makarov would be the dm because he’s a control freak but no. it’s lev. lev is the kind of dm that has a mean streak as deep as an oceanic trench and while he may not go super hard on the lore he does overcompensate by making the npcs have VERY strong personalities. he likes to make his plots about the end of the world and/or universe in some way but it’s always the question of “how” that compels you
makarov meanwhile always plays a wizard which makes him virtually fucking useless for the first two levels. i think his favourite subclasses would be either evocation or bladesinger. let’s say he mains bladesinger. gotta get that “fucking kills you with my overpowered sword” and “fucking kills you with disintegrate” double whammy combo. he does get downed a lot though. this is why yuri is a paladin. his storylines always inevitably get dragged into him trying to become a lich. he has about a 33% success rate so far but everybody’s rooting for him. in their current campaign he has managed to become a vampire and he is making it everybody’s (yuri’s neck’s) problem
yuri never uses any of his healing on himself either, always makarov. i’m thinking either oath of vengeance, glory, or oathbreaker with a veeery rare dip into redemption (mostly because. it fucking sucks. but the flavour bro the flaaavour). i think he’d enjoy bloodhunter if he could ever get out of the “need to stop makarov from getting downed fifteen times in one session” grind even though they HAVE a healer. he’s usually pretty minimal about his backstories but by association with anatoly they always leave you clawing at the walls, especially considering how mildly he plays it. his characters keep fucking dying. nobody lets him stay dead, though
if you think anatoly would be the healer you’d be wrong. usually he’s either an eldritch/echo knight or zealot barbarian. sometimes both. he deals NASTY damage and doesn’t give a shit if you hit him back. somehow he always has the most devastating backstories and his storylines in the campaigns are fucking gutwrenching. he and yuri keep making their characters siblings and it hurts every time 👍 kind of guy that made a deal with at least one god of death to being yuri back
kiril makes joke characters that get out of hand. every time. he likes artificer but he’s not picky. he also does wild magic sorcerer for the sillies. the goofs. this has backfired frequently, which is half of the delight. for a oneshot he made a wildfire druid with zero backstory and roleplayed her as cocky and arrogant the whole time and then at the end it was revealed her memories were taken and this whole quest was to kill the person that took them, which also just so happened to be the macguffin of the whole goddamn thing. everyone’s endings hinged on finding this guy. and she killed his ass so fast. kiril’s ruthless when he wants to be. somehow, despite himself, he manages to be extremely compelling. in their current campaign he’s playing a sentient sock puppet named horst. horst has made people cry
alexi is the healer. he’s fucking pissed. he tried to branch out by playing a hexblade One (1) time and the party got tpk’d instantly. usually he plays some form of cleric, any form of cleric, dear god he wants SOME variety, but occasionally he can pull off a shepherd or star druid if he’s lucky. maybe a lore bard. when he’s not trapped in the torment nexus of what anatoly refers to as “his daily life” he managed to create some viscerally offputting characters. his backstories are simple but effective. he once played a guy that hid his lycanthropy for the entire campaign until the last few sessions leading up to the bbeg fight and everyone was so put offguard they had to call a mid-session break. lev enables this kind of shit readily. the impression alexi gives is “would have been a murder hobo if he wasn’t forced to be the token full support.” sometimes he does shit though,,,, you do not usually see many clerics putting their axe through a priest’s chest but here we are
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limetameta · 1 year
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Played the Last of Us when I was a kid and now I watched the show for the first time and I gotta tell you what this has spawned is a TLOU au in Fmab where Riza and Edward are Joel and Ellie. Al is dead. Blood seal broke trying to save Ed from the infected swarming them. Ed is immune because he did human transmutation. Actually in this au it isnt a fungal evolution type infection per se as much as its a bioalchemy experiment on fungi gone severely wrong so the only people immune are those who did human transmutation because it's fun, chimeras can get infected but it doesn't really spread like it does with humans so they have a longer time before they turn or maybe they need to get bit multiple times to turn. Homunculi ofc are immune because of the ph stone. Want to say that they use a gotcha system where if they get bit one of the souls in the ph stone croaks and not them. Absolutely same deal with Mr I swallow ph stones like a whore Kimblee who doesnt broadcast he has a ph stone so ppl think he's legit immune and they're hunting this mf down for a vaccine.
The author that brought you gnarly scenes such as anything in Black Honour also brings you a scene where Maes has to shoot baby Elicia because she got infected and went wild trying to kill Ed :D
Berthold Hawkeyes house is the best place to be. That man made a bunker decades before anyone thought smth like this might ever happen.
Riza and Ed run into many different folks on their way to figure out what the fuck is happening (this is like set in the 1st month since shit hit the fan so double the chaos - think trains getting derailed because of people going crazy and trying to eat each other - absolute pandemonoum purge type shenanigans where everything is new and the government is losing its grasp on the people)
Riza and Ed are trying to find Roy Mustang whom they only heard is somewhere up north east. Maybe in Central City (it hit it here first and hardest - overrun with infected)
They sent most of the State Alchemist to try and take care of this. But some like General Grand and Colonel Mustang got orders to take care of the infected and make sure it didnt spread - ie theyre the bombs in this au eyy it wasnt enough to do this shit in Ishval guess you need to do it again but in towns with ppl u genuinely know :D !! Horrific shit. Reason why Riza isnt with Mustang and doesnt know where he is.
Radios are down and they need to reastablish some towers that were knocked down.
(Fort Briggs for example in this au would be 0 infected because they kill the infected imediatelly sucks to be u but they are preserving their numbers and they too are in a giant bunker of sorts)
The homunculi are very pissed off about this because you cant use the infected as a soul for their big transmutation circle so Father has put them on Top priority to get to the bottom of this because they are running out of TIME.
Just for shits and giggles. And this rly is the cursed timeline: instead of splicing his daughter with her dog for his recertification exam, Shou Tucker tried doing a lil bit of a bioalchemy experiment with fungi :) because he's such a fun guy eyyy
Riza and Ed are in CC and Riza gets stabbed so this is now Ed's solo arc trying to find medicine for her and anyone to help. He takes her to Christmas dive bar to recuperate. Not a soul to be found there. Everyone is fleeing Amestris. Folks in Resembool are going to Ishval because they know nobody is there in the ruins. Ed doesnt know if Pinako and Winry are even alive but he hopes they are. Someone has to be in this mess.
Ed doesnt rly want to use his alchemy because the more he does the easier it is for these infected to find him. And while he is immune he doesnt fancy losing more limbs to these bastards.
Riza looked super unwell. Ed doesnt know if hed be able to navigate any of this by himself. He doesnt know if anyone he knows is still alive. She is his lifeline at the moment and this means he has to save her. Especially if Mustang is still alive. They gotta meet him and they gotta succeed.
Ed knows the hospital is too far away. But theres got to be a pharmacy nearby or smth he can raid. He has to.
But all of them have already been raided. And the infected are growing in numbers. Yet Ed refuses to go back. He can't let Riza down. He can't let someone else he loves die protecting him.
Through a series of dastardly events, Edward winds up finding a shackled man trying to break free from some infected chimeras. The man is screaming for help and crying and really being pathetic. Ed is the people's alchemist so he will help you pathetic crying man! Winds up saving him. Winds up getting mugged because the seemingly infeccted chimeras and the man are in on a con together to survive.
Edward fights them. Gets overpowered due to numbers. "MOTHERFUCKERS!!!"
"Children these days are so rude :/ "
Anyway after some more back and forth Ed learns this guy is some big shot alchemist from Ishval and asks him if he knows Riza Hawkeye. He needs medicine for her.
The chimeras are all like sorry kid we dont have any medicine.
Kimblee, with a ph stone in him: I could heal her with some alchemy. Our party would benefit from a sniper.
So Riza gets saved via ph stone. Wakes up and sees Kimblee. Imediatelly takes a gun and tries to shoot him.
Especially when she sees his bite marks!! Motherfucker STEP AWAY. Hes like I got these weeks ago!! Liar! No, really! I'm immune! And I'm the Fuhrer President himself *cocks gun*
Fun times lay ahead on their search for Roy Mustang.
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penname-artist · 1 year
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Help I cannot stop thinking about various kinks and other such preferences that characters (canon and OC alike) have:
I'm pretty sure everyone who's found my content is aware that I will put both Dusty and Nick through literally anything. I don't even need to specify them, one of them is shamelessly horny and the other is both curious and too humble for his own good and that's a dangerous thing to be when you're that submissive and bree- ANYWAYS
I've always thought Blade is really good with - and preferring of - two things: personal control and endurance. He's a control freak as it were (this is not new information I'm sure) but he has a vibe that just screams show me what you're capable of. If going the extra mile with your stamina does that, I think that'd be right up his alley.
Windlifter is tricky because I think by default he probably stands on one of two sides of the line, either he's the most vanilla motherfucker you've ever seen, or you don't WANT to know the things that he gets up to. So why not both? Soft and lighthearted lover, until that one night every now and again when he breaks out the ginger roots (don't- don't look that up, I beg of thee)
Cabbie. Yeah he's a tough one but I'm gonna play it safe tonight and say he's probably...rough but casual. Vanilla, yes. A lot to handle, also yes. Could he kill you? Probably. Will he? The...the jury is out on that one until next Tuesday my guy. Jus don't piss him off, got it?
Dipper is one of our kind, so I feel like we all kind of know how that goes. Maybe. No? No takers, nobody? Y'all hate this bitch on purpose sometimes I swear, anyways, she's probably really kinky in a really ADHD "way" - like, leave room as a power move and forget your partner on the bed on occasion, kind of way. And you know she's probably pegged someone before
Maru is just like. A secret. The man of the secrets to be kept. Has he ever slept with another being? Who knows! Does he mention it? Not once! Do we still get an idea of his preferences with that lack of info? Yeah a bit, I think he's like Blade a little, he prefers that safety of control of his surroundings.
We're moving onto OCs now because I wanna, and TYKER is a very interesting lover. He's generally really into any/all power dynamics, even if it's really light, and even if he's not the one emitting the power too. And I won't lie he seems like a type of guy who would be into breeding. But in all facets he's really calm and relaxed, he rarely lets his freak show out. Well, it slips every now and again. But not often.
Clutch is definitely a power player, and down to clown with a lot of dynamics and things. She's on the list with Dusty and Nick in a way, she'll try anything, experimentation is fun.
Milo is so fucking adorable and he hates it but then because he hates it his face turns red and that makes him SO ADORABLE anyways he's very much into praise, as well as a little of pet-play. He's definitely had a collar and leash on before. But, he's red-faced and fanning himself about whatever he gets into because he's also a fucking dork. Tyker is so so gentle with him you have no idea.
Apollo - yes hello he still exists and he's nagging me about it - is really into passionate shit, romantic aesthetic shit, music playing over the sounds of. Copulating. *Ahem* and he's kinda into biting and hickies, he just hates actually having them because he's always gotta cover it up (no WONDER he's always in turtlenecks, guys I figured it out)
Saga is a feisty bitch, do NOT let her sweet green exterior fool you. She will twirl her boy-toy around like a stick and absolutely show him a good time. She's also into slow stuff, and music inclusion because it's only her second life, but after that she really likes fancy bondage and lingerie, anything pretty you can wear while you're doing it all (side note Apollo likes this as well but I didn't add it to his because, when handed the option for lacey underwear or getting bit by a potential vampire...yeah I'm saying he's weak for fantasy.)
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tragedienes · 1 year
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@mutatedangels / in reply to this, because i like to turn memes into threads lol i hope that's okay! made in beta.
soleil was a fuckin' liar. there, she just said it, and jeannie's already tenuous belief in her shattered completely then. that was what hurt the most, suspecting that she had been lying and then believing her anyway. jeannie felt a little mean, privately thinking her friend's stories were fabricated, or in the very least exaggerated, but she chose to give soleil the benefit of the doubt because she had just been so damn lonely. even before, when she was just a child and ice skating was only a hobby instead of her occupation, jeannine had a hard time making friends. the culture that figure skating promoted didn't exactly lend its self to friendships much either—everyone, even the few friends she did have, were competition.
she had left that all behind her, though. at least she had tried. since officially hanging up her skates and returning to small town louisiana, she had the same problems she did before, now she just made a lot less money (and had a lot less stress, too). her coworkers at big lots hadn't warmed up to her, nor had she warmed up to them, in her long eight months stocking shelves and ringing up customers. her step-mother, jesus christ did jeannie hate her, and she loved her toddler half-sister but she couldn't be counted as a friend. enter soleil.
soleil reminded her of a time in her life she had tried hard not to miss. she was glamorous and glossy, always speaking of fabulous adventures and famous people. jeannie had not wanted to admit that skating came with benefits, all the sponsorships and free clothing, all the perks that being a (moderately) successful skater gained. she had not wanted to admit that sometimes she still dreamt of olympic gold, she still wished she could've made it farther in her career, that she hadn't given it all up just because she was getting older and aging out. even if a tiny part of her thought soleil was a bullshitter, she was willing to ignore it if it meant she could still be in reaching distance of fame. maybe, if their friendship continued to grow, they'd both head out to new orleans or hollywood and take advantage of soleil's supposed famous connections, and jeannie could probably try her hand at being an influencer or something. just anything to get her out of her dad's house and a big lots uniform.
hearing her friend's excuses, it was making jeannie feel frustrated, ready for a tantrum that would make a kindergartner think she needed to relaxx. "that is not the way to play this!" uncrossing her arms, she held out her hands exasperatingly. even if there was some truth to what she was saying, jeannie didn't think that was a good enough explanation. sure, the house that jeannie lived in was nice, half a million dollars, but it was her dad's house. she had no real claim to it, not with her dad's new family taking up most of the space. sure, she had been used to the finer things in life, being gifted nike shoes and adidas sports bras, taking first class trips to european countries for competitions and exhibitions. that was all in the past, however. that wasn't the girl she was anymore. if anything, jeannie was more like her than soleil had realized: they were both broke as fuck. at least jeannie hadn't lied about it, though.
seeing her friend start to cry, it almost broke her resolve. she held fast, chin turning upwards slightly. "did you ever consider that maybe i would've liked you even if you did live in some shitbox and hadn't made up a bunch of stories?" jeannine dryly swallowed. the slow, sad little tear dragging down soleil's face nearly made her crack, but she kept it together. "i didn't have nobody either, y'know. i came back here to this town i hate and live with people i hate, and work with people i hate. you were the only person 'round these parts that didn't piss me off... now i really don't have anybody. in fact, i wish i had never met you. then i wouldn't be so disappointed."
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calypso-finale · 2 years
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Thirty Eight.
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Today is very much my last day in LA and I feel bittersweet because I have pushed this for so long, I have stayed longer then I should have. Oakley been wanting to go home and I pushed it for an extra few days because of the home sale to go through, which it did but we had paperwork and then my accountant questioning my sale and then his money, it was just a lot of going back and forth. Oakley doesn’t have an accountant, he then ran in trouble getting his own money out, he has a business account which then as a holder in that bank which then put a hold on the transfer, it was a mess so then I ended up just paying through my accountant and then his bank got a hold of my accountant and put it back in, let’s just say I will be fixing his account when we go back, his independent living thing has to stop but we are proud owners of a cute little three bedroom west Hollywood home, I am happy but I know Oakley wants to go home. He is bored and had enough, he has turned into a chauffeur for me, he literally just drives me around most part of the time “I have never seen someone pack the way you do” I said to him “I am ready to go” he smiled “right?” I said “well I am going to see my family one last time before we go home, and catch that flight tonight” he is so miserable “Oakley come on” I said to him “the thing is, you ain’t ever bored with me in London, least you can rock up to my family home, my mom may be dense but the door is always open but anyways, I am glad to be going back home” nodding my head slowly “Oakley, if I could have you in the house I would. Just last time and it won’t be a while until we do come back, what has pissed you off the most, being bored or my mom?” he just shrugged, didn’t answer “maybe your mom, maybe being here. I don’t know, what can I say. I just think it’s fake, the whole situation, the whole thing that happened” he walked off, my mom is wrong because she didn’t need to say to Oakley you can’t protect my daughter, I don’t know what she wanted him to do, commit murder for me but it’s annoyed him to the point he told me I can’t go Barbados, I just don’t understand why my mom likes to randomly cause shit for me, like these words she says. She comes to the hotel to see Aziel without me being here and pisses off my man “I will speak to her” I said aloud, rolling my eyes as I do because it’s just drama for nothing.
Looking over at Oakley as the car stopped “I really hate when you’re grumpy, you know I do” he refuses to cheer up either “but I don’t get why she had to say that, would it make me a better person if I killed a guy? Is that what you’re parents want from me?” I chuckled “no, Oakley. Stop it, you are being so sensitive now, my mom just said it in passing, I can imagine she didn’t think it would upset you. What upset you the most? Talk to me, come on” he looked over at me “that people think I can’t when I can, I take care of you all the time and it seems like it ain’t enough. I have never asked you for anything, I never once asked you for money, for anything in life right now yeah. But it’s like people are checking for you, like I got it. I don’t need you to be minding me. Just annoys me” nodding my head “Oakley, I know from the bottom of my heart you take care of me, that is what I love about you. You have never asked anything of me, from the very start. You barely knew me, and you got me that Cartier bracelet, like you do. I see it, you’re a good man to me and the only opinion that should matter is mine, and I know you care for me. So who cares about anyone else, nobody is with us or lives with us. You get so mad at things” touching the side of his face, he turned his head into my hand more “I know, and at some point you will be invited to come to the home, just give it time. I know it’s boring for you when we go” he looked to me “yep” he cleared his throat “I think with the whole Barbados thing, my mom is more protecting you then not asking for you to come, my dad” I paused “he still gets shit going there, she can’t even protect my dad against them so how can she do it for you” I admitted and it’s the truth “but we will see what happen ok?” he nodded his head, my mom is a pain right now.
Herb gasped in shock “I ain’t ever had a child cry on me like this, what you been saying to him?” I chuckled; he isn’t wrong. All the kids love him “I don’t know uncle, it’s you” my dad took Aziel from him “you made him cry! And for what goofy” shaking my head, I know Herb is offended “Essie, you coming with me. Let’s leave these people” Herb picked his baby up from the floor and walked off “I am taking him outside” my dad said “sure, I don’t mind” Imani came out of nowhere and sat on my lap “I am so sad you’re going back Rylee!” she whined out “same, I am going to miss LA. I have enjoyed it a lot, just seeing everyone and then my friends” I gasped “P and North! You came” North leaned down to me so I didn’t need to get up “love you bitch” she kissed my forehead “so good seeing you both, I am shocked at the turn out, I mean I wasn’t doing a goodbye leaving party” I chuckled “well, to us. You mean a lot and you’re going to London and we don’t know when you will be back” P hugged me “I am sad you’re going” I cooed out “I leave with a sore arm still so yeah” I laughed “what a night, hi Miss Fenty” North waved “wow full house” looking to the door and Tianna is back up “you’re home, I am so proud of you” my mom shot up and went over, I looked away from her because it’s fuck her “I heard you got a house! I was thinking I could stay there” I laughed at Imani saying that “no” I pointed “you need to have a house sitter, we was discussing erm, with your mom about it all and she said that you’re going to be gone for a while so I know a few people, your mom said she will look over it for you” nodding my head “she did, I appreciate it that she is doing that for me. But Imani wants to move out already?” Mel laughed “she is trying to escape, now why is that? I heard that you told your mom you don’t want another sibling” Imani groaned out “because Raihan is already annoying and also we don’t need it” Mel cooed out “I felt like that when all of you wee bit, but you will love it” Imani pulled a face “you didn’t agree to it when mom said” I chuckled “then I woke up and realised I won’t be here” I grinned, Imani scoffed.
I need to catch my mom alone and she is “I love it, I love having a full house. My kids home, my family, friends. My grandchild. I am happy” I smiled “I am glad you’re happy mom, I want Aziel to know this side too. The way the boys are with him, everyone is so attentive with him, he is so spoilt with love from either side because erm, Oakley family adore him too and he is blessed. I am happy too” my mom is laughing “but” she said, I breathed “but, there is a but and I can sense you already know why there is?” I said “I do, but I just said it. I feel like Oakley you know, he should be the tough guy” shaking my head “mom” I paused “I don’t need you to tell him what to do, I really don’t. He already has this nonsense of gang culture from where he came from, where we live in Kensington is just a block away from where he is from. I don’t want it, he does fine yeah. I don’t need you to say that to him again, because really the only person I needed and wanted was him, I know he got me. And also he seems to be very affected by me being here, because he is alone and he doesn’t know anybody” my mom cleared her throat “then maybe leave him at home, he doesn’t need to come” squinting my eyes “how did you feel when momo said that to you” my mom looked away from me “not nice is it, he is here because I asked him to be. I want you to be mindful mom, you don’t need to say these things” my mom is quiet because she knows she is wrong “ok” she just said “I wasn’t trying to be rude, but ok” looking at Tianna as she made her way into the kitchen “are you two still not going to speak?” my mom said “I have nothing in common with a baby mother” I laughed “and I have nothing in common with a bitch that rides dick for a living” she looked at me “I think you’re jealous, you’re actually so jealous of what I have, I may be a baby mother but I have a stable home. I guess you saw that we got a home here too. Still riding mommy and daddy wave” I said laughing “you riding commercial like the local you are” I laughed out “is that all you have? Tianna you’re literally the whore of LA” feeling a tap on my shoulder “now, let’s be nice” Tianna is livid “have you seen the bitch next to you, she snorts lines” North laughed “isn’t there nudes floating of you with Melo? Mhmmm imagine that Tianna, fucking Melo and he is currently catching a case for your sister” I am trying not to laugh, North screamed out as Tianna threw the knife that was in her hand at her “right! Enough!” my mom shouted.
It is very much Tianna looking unhinged, I am going to just sit here and be with my friends “what happened though?” my dad asked as he made his way over “what happened was Tianna threw a knife at me sir” my dad crouched down to us “right, thanks North but how and what happened? She is going crazy in there and is very upset” of course she is “dad she started it, she spoke on me being a baby mother, how about she let the hurt go. Listen dad, I just want Tianna to let it go. I am not her enemy like she thinks, if she wants to fight me then so be it too” my dad shook his head “no, I don’t think so. I just think right now you both don’t speak to each other. I want you to mind your business, she will too” nodding my head “and don’t look at my son!” I spat, she come outside of course “I can do what I like in my home” getting up “no, you don’t look at my son, you don’t go near him. You’re a shit person, starting all this shit for what!? You always let a fucking man do this! All the time Tianna” Imani is just staring at us “fuck off Rylee, like seriously. It’s always the Rylee show, if I want to look at the child you had at that ripe age then I will” she isn’t going to look at my son as she think she can” stepping to her and she just laughed “you on some drug, I just know it Tianna. You bad but not this bad, let me help you” Tianna pushed me “fuck you Rylee! You never been a sister to me, you was the golden child, always will be! Always will be! I am fucking over it, I hate the fact you are around still” of course she does “Ti, that is mean. Stop it” Imani said “not mean, are you blind to it or something. Mom and dad love this bitch more then any of us put together” I rolled my eyes walking over to Aziel “come here” picking my son out of Imani arms “so lame” I breathed out “what is lame is you, you got pregnant and had a baby and still came out smelling of roses” she barked “what about it Ti? Huh, what a mother fucking about it? You a lame fucking bitch I give you that, I tried to be nice to you and keep your name clean” I got in her face “Melo fucked you and thought of me, how about that bitch, don’t like it do you?” I have had enough of her, I moved back “with my son? You swinging? You dumb bitch” my dad get in my way “sssshhhh it’s ok, your auntie is a cunt” rocking Aziel as I walked off, she can holler all she wants.
I called Oakley to pick us up, I don’t want to be here when she is still kicking off in this house “you can come if you want” I said to North “I have my car so it’s fine, she won’t stop either. Like isn’t she ashamed of herself” I shrugged “maybe my parents need to put her in counselling, upset my son too. Look at him now, he is miserable” he is just in Ps arms staring at me “I will be coming to London soon” I gasped “please do, I have my assignments to do when I get back. I just want to get this shit over with, I want to drive in London too because, I was discussing it with Oakley. I can get a ferry to Europe to do my fashion business and come back, like I can drive there so I need to sort that out that for me” that is on my list “you not going to take care of Fenty over there or doing your own thing?” I paused thinking “my own thing right now, I just want to do it for myself and also with Tianna getting involved with it I don’t want to bother, she can have it. I have my riches, I have my own family but she needs to get over herself and quick” seeing Oakley has messaged me “he is here, I guess that is me” getting up, I would have stayed a little longer but Tianna is draining me, clearly she has taken over my parents because they haven’t come to me at all “boys! I am going now” Raihan and Junior looked at me “you not staying longer?” shaking my head “no, I am going home now” they both came over to me “oh is that London” nodding my head, wrapping my arms around both of them “hopefully see you for Aziel birthday, I think it will be that long anyways” I can imagine it will be “I guess” Junior mumbled.
I think Oakley is so used to my family coming out, he doesn’t even get out of the car but Raihan has made himself comfortable in the front seat “whatever issue she got then I think she needs counselling for it” my dad sighed out “probably got what I got” I frowned “well dad you’re the best teacher right, I just don’t want to stay here and Aziel is you know. He is upset and it’s too much drama. But yeah, I was saying to the boys, probably see you all on Aziel birthday, it will end up being that long” my mom is thinking hard but then realised “yeah, you’re right. He is six months so it’s about right, well we got that group chat now so you have to upset us all, I mean Tianna took herself out of the group but please, send all the pictures and we will keep you updated on our side” nodding my head “I will do, and mom please, or auntie. Sort that house sitter for me, you have all the codes. Please” I said “your dad will, he said it. Don’t worry about it” hugging my mom “thanks and thank you, even if there was drama, and drama with me” I appreciate it, stepping back from the hug “dad, I leave here on a better note. I have my family in my heart” my dad grinned “you made my heart lighter too” he said hugging me tight “I love you Rylee” closing my eyes “I love you too dad, and I believe you can sort out Ti. I think she just wants attention” which she does “and you’re the best” he laughed “I try” he is the best, moving back from the hug “take care Rylee, all three of you” my mom said “thanks, Imani! I want updates from you” she smiled at me, I worry about my little sister a lot.
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hospitalterrorizer · 23 days
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diary343
8/28-29/24
wendesday - thursday
sleepy now...
errands day was okay, better than last week at least, my gf is just so wound up about her mom's surgery, it's hard for me to know where she's coming from all the way because there were lots of times my mom went in for surgeries for her back and i was a kid and it didn't occur to me that things could go very wrong, and when she broke her leg and crawled all the way to the house and it was just me at home, and i didn't hear because i was in the shower and i had to call 911 and everything, i wasn't like, scared, it seemed like everything would just work out, i was like, upset of course, it's all not pleasant but it's all like, i guess complications didn't occur to me because they couldn't. all the stuff my mom went through was like, of course she'll live. my gf's doubt i guess, it makes sense, her mother is older than mine ever was for her surgeries, i'm just, i don't know, i'm used to people living until they stop. mostly they decide to stop. her mom's survived a lot of things. it seems like her family is built like that. even if there's an infection which seems possible and even something we should all expect and prepare for (feels condescending to say prepare, what am i really going to do, all i can do is imagine and hope it doesn't, hope to figure out how to make my gf feel better if it does happen, how to help her mother, if even possible (likely not.)), but her family just seems to live, on spite mostly. my mom lived because maybe she's like me, and it's like, well, okay, i guess tomorrow is here, and that keeps happening to you, and years later you realize something has happened to you, and you can't take it back. my gf's family mostly seems to be interested in doing things to people. that's hard to divorce from living usually. i know i'm talking in all abstracts, like, it's some strange ephemeral force occupying some bodies, and not others, but it's not necessarily how i see it. i don't think at least. i can't tell. it's not about some kind of ... lottery? it's just that it gets expressed over time as a response. my grandma seemed to die in a way that said, it's time, i get this sense because i guess she was found in a small nest she made in a corner on a bunch of towels in her house, to not dirty anything else. my uncle died in a way that was also: it's time, but he made it time, by letting things get bad and never telling anyone. my friend died by killing himself, which is probably similar to my uncle, just less abstracted. my grandma on my dad's side seemed to die because it was natural, she'd had enough. she always seemed like someone who had enough anyway. her mother isn't really there, her mother drunkenly drove to utah and came back on pills or something and almost died in her sleeping, pissing herself, going to the hospital and treating the staff poorly, and then still lived. sober, now, attached to life more, receiving surgery to make pain disappear hopefully, she still seems to really want to do more. she won't slack on at least attempting to solve problems that seem to come up. this is what makes her so scary sometimes because she'll see nonexistant issues and do things that don't need to be done, just freaking us all out. but that's evidence of attachment and some kind of pro-active attitude, she's more self reliant than most people, she's so self reliant and capable she made both of her children less capable because she was always feeling that she knew better and could do better, and let them off, which creates all kinds of fucked up things. either way, if she does die, from this, it would be from over-working herself still. maybe more than the infection, she's scared nobody is gonna give enough of a shit about her to help her. in that case, should i go over and try to help for some days of the week? maybe. i guess i ought to think about that. her brother won't help, her husband won't, he's too busy going on stupid trips, getting drunk, both of them, husband and son.
it's a downer to think about, i guess. i dunno. i feel okay mostly. maybe i'm like dead inside or something. my gf seems so scared and it manifests in odd ways, she was upset today because i wanted to go home and not spend too long in a korean supermarket... i said 'we can come back, we'll be back i'm sure' and she kept saying she fought to get us there, and that we won't come back, and that's how it's coming through her, the anxiety about things changing, or maybe it's not even about death, it's just anxiety over having to wait. i don't know how to begin to help her with that, if it's the case. it's not fun not getting things you want but i guess that's also something i'm dead to and i feel bad a lot of the time because i want nothing, and get nothing, and i am nothing, so i'm given nothing. that's not true entirely only in abstract ways and abstract places (online) my girlfriend gives me all the things i need and want basically, it's that there's things i don't know i want that i can't ask for, not to make things about myself though i did but whatever. it's just odd. i feel opposite to her in some way, she can find things she desires always, i can't tell what i want, if i even want at all, usually. well i want all the time in ways but those things aren't really acceptable to write out. a way to put it is i want to be made to not think because of stuff like fire, i guess. inside my stomach. not like, alcohol obv i'm straightedge. it's other stuff.
obviously, her anxiety about it possibly happening, anything going wrong, as badly as possible, that's really well founded. i'm probably in the wrong for not feeling it as strongly. i certainly do feel bad about it on some level, i just don't know. i don't think worrying like that helps, especially not saying it out loud to her mom. but i do understand why. it's scary, horrifying probably to everyone. i'm sure if my mom went in for surgery for something i may freak out too i guess. i dunno. i just want her to not be scared.
not much else done today, some light music stuff worked on... not much else, tomorrow i'll do more, i have to sleep now,
so,
byebye!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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sadistic-softie · 5 months
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Sometimes I need to stop, take a step back, and ask myself, "Am I ok?" and the answer is always, "uuhh?????????"
therapy gets so repetative and exhausting. When am i gonna move on from complaining about the same problems actually get to the helping part? And how many therapists is it gonna take before I get there? I'm on number...7??? 8? 9???? and i hate that every single one of them has been like, ~most therapists go through the notes and records of the patients health conditions and past sessions with other therapists, but I don't like to do that here. I like to start clean and fresh with each patient so I can hear it from them. I have your chart and all your info here, but i just wanna hear if from you~. Because im so cool and all the other therapists suck mega penis~ Like stfu and please read my chart for the love of god i dont need to go through hours of sessions of straight miserable traumadumping every single time i get disconnected from a therapist and have to spend 5 months on the waiting list for a new one. And it's so easy to just get dropped by therapists too. I missed 2 appointments ever? gone. Therapist suddenly vanished from the establishment? We can't replace them! find a whole new place! Your new therapist sucks and just tells you to get over it? Give us a month and we'll see if we can find someone else for you. oopsies! your therapist got fired! Nothing we can do about that! Your therapist forced you into a situation that she knew would put you in danger of abuse? It was her job! FUCK. I literally get better therapy from calling 988, crisis lines, or abuse hotlines for 10 minutes and they're free. Might as well just call THEM on a weekly basis since they ACTUALLY FUCKING HELP YOU WHEN YOU ASK FOR FUCKING HELP. They give you advice, comfort, support, coping mechanisms, distractions, suggestions, resources, ideas, communities, etc etc. Seriously. Therapy, in all my years, barely ever does that shit unless you're on the brink of breakdown because "why is nothing working!?" nothing's working because it's literally nothing being put to work. They're putting nothing machines in your brain factory, and when 'NOTHING' is working, no progress gets made.
Honestly. Sometimes, I feel like maybe I'm just really unlucky with my therapists. I be spilling my soul to them and begging for help and they're just like. "Hmmm...that does seem very difficult...What do you think I can do to help you?" and i just...like..."I don't know??? im not really a mental health specialist??? Like you??????" and they fucking laugh and go, "Well, that is true...hmmmmm, let me think...you seem to be doing everything you cannnn...hmmmm" God, i never show it but tht shit pisses me off so bad. The more times i hear "What do you think i can do to help?" and "Hmmmmmmm" and overly fucking drawn out words, the more 'asshole' and ingenuine it sounds. It sounds like mockery. It sounds like they think I'm a toddler trying to figure out how to manuver their first 4 piece puzzle. They sound like when teachers say "I dunno. Can you?" when you ask if you can use the restroom. Like...Do you think I'm fucking around when I say I don't know what to do? Do you think I just ask for help for shits and giggles? Do you think, "I'm feeling suicidal" is just a quirky little catchphrase? Like, fuck. Just listen to one fucking thing I say. I pay you for this. Just fucking listen to me and hear the words coming out of my mouth and process what they actually fucking mean. I fucking have nobody else and I'm paying you to help me not fucking kill myself and you're gonna fucking sit there, eating cereal, talking about how your 'poor husband' was so shy "just like me" that he didn't make the first move on you when you first met, like this session is about comparing my socially crippling mental condition to a common case of the nerves, acting like you're my casual best friend or acting like this is me learning 2 plus fucking 2 in kindergarden math class with god damn counting blocks and you don't wanna give me too many hints that give the answer away. FUCK. OFF. No fucking wonder your other patients cuss you out. I bet they're soooo lucky to have you like you're sooo lucky that im so god damn polite and articulate. You like that im so articulate, huh? You really get what im saying? How about this next one?: QUIT YOUR JOB.
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