#because the thing going on with his parents affected him whether he is conscious about it or not

[thinkofhee]

Jersey #04

Pairings : Enemy!Jungwon x F!Reader

Summary: There was a Basketball Tournament in the court of your school. You went there only because your crush was playing too. You wore his jersey but Jungwon saw you. "You're gonna change, whether you like it or not."

warnings: dom!jw x sub!reader, fingering, unprotected sex (don't do this), orgasm denial, overstimulation, hair pulling, mentions of Yunjin & Chaewon from Lesserafim (lmk if I missed anything)

"Babes!!" Yunjin called me as I walked up to her. "Why?" You asked, confused why she called you— "There's a basketball game and your crush, Heeseung is going to be playing! Your enemy too" You weren't aware nor updated because you've been pretty busy with your thesis. "Eyy, are you gonna watch later?" She asked you, and you nodded.

You planned on wearing your crushes jersey, considering he gave you one a couple weeks ago.

-

You changed into his jersey and started walking to the court. But someone stopped you— It was Jungwon..

"Let go, Jungwon. I don't have the time for your shit" You say, pissed off, trying to shake his hands off.

He pulls you to the side and holds your waist.— "why are you wearing a jersey that's not mine, Y/n?" He asked, looking directly in your eyes like he was about to eat you alive.

"Why do you care?" You say in a sassy tone and roll your eyes. "Change into mine, right now" Jungwon says in a deep, stern tone. Honestly, you were pretty intimidated but you weren't going to let that affect you.

"I'm not doing it, Jungwon. Let go" You say in a bored-like tone while pushing him away. He just grips you harder and tugs on the jersey.

"Wear mine. Right now" You shake your head, "I'm not gonna repeat it again, Lee Y/n." He says coldly, You knew what was going to happen at this point. He was gonna be a snitch to your parents, knowing they and his parents are bestfriends and he has done it before too!

"Ok! Fine!" He smiles when he heard that, He went to his locker and gets another pair of his jersey and gives it to you.

-

You changed into his jersey and is now in the court. Watching them warm up.

Chaewon seems to be looking at you up and down, "Damn, Y/n, I thought you were going to wear the jersey of YOUR crush? Is Jungwon really your crush, hm?" She teasingly asks you. But you shrugged her off.

-

The game was about to end, A tough battle was happening..

Jungwon manages to get the ball and shoot!

The crowd cheers for him, As for you, You were shocked aand amazed by his skills. You didn't think he was THAT good in Basketball.

-

Everyone, Including you left the court. You were walking in the hallway, Alone, Since Yunjin and Chaewon decided to go and talk to their crushes.

You were scrolling through your phone when someone suddenly puts his arm around your shoulder.

"Did I do good? Did I impress you?" He smiles and looks at you. You looked at him and nodded without realizing it.

"Let's celebrate at my house? 7?" He invites you, You agreed.

-

You rang the doorbell wearing the shorts you wore earlier and a sweater.

Jungwon opens the door and greets you, "Glad you actually came" He chuckles. "Well, I actually do attend unlike you who I invited to my party last last year yet you didn't come!"

-

That's the last thing you remembered before you start getting a little drunk. You were flirting with Jungwon. If you were in your conscious state, You would probably be vomiting knowing that.

He smirks obliviously while he wraps his hands on your waist, Your arms were wrapped on his neck.

He leans down and kisses you, You kissed him back.

Both of your tongues were fighting for dominance while slowly entering the bedroom.

Small, low moans came out from your mouth. The door locking as you both enter Jungwon's bedroom.

You layed down, panting. He climbs over you and starts pressing kisses from your neck to your collarbone.

"J-jungwon, Please.." You moaned out as he marked you.

"Hm? Yes, princess?" He smirks. "What does my princess want?" He asks you like an innocent child while his fingers start roaming your body.

Your back arched when he presses his fingers onto your still clothed cunt.

"Please, Please..Touch me" You moaned out, Feeling desperate as you grinded on his fingers. He pins your waist down to prevent you from grinding.

You whined, Desperate to meet release. He removes your shorts and sees a wet spot on your panties. That made him grow more confidence.

"I haven't even done more to you yet you're this wet?" He chuckles as he drags his finger on your wet pussy. You whimper when all of a sudden he shoved two fingers in.

"W-Wait!" You screech, Feeling pleasure and pain as his fingers stretch you out.

"I thought you wanted this, Y/n?" He chuckles as his fingers go in and out, Not even halting to stop.

He hits that one spot that has you arching your back, You moaned with pleasure.

"I t-think I-I'm.." You started but you couldn't compose a sentence because Jungwon still doesn't halt and hits that spot repeatedly which dragged you to your edge.

"Cumming!" You stated as you finally released.

You were panting when all of a sudden, Jungwon plunges three fingers and mercilessly pound it into your pussy, overstimulating your cunt.

"N-no!! Shit, I'm sensitive!"

"But you wanted this, Right? Me overstimulating your tight little cunt? Huh, Princess?"

Eventually, You once again reached your high and feeling exhausted. This time he let you recover first.

Not long while later, He started unbuckling his belt and took of his pants, Revealing his fully hard shaft.

You gulped at the sight, "Will it fit?" Runs your mind.

"Yes, It will fit. I'll make it fit" He mumbles while he goes close to you, You were shocked because he knew what was on your mind!

He started rubbing the tip to tease you, He was having fun doing so. But it didn't take a while when he entered.

"I-It won't fit!" Scared something might happen but he didn't mind. Instead he switched your places, You were now on top of him.

"Go ahead princess, Do it yourself"

Your shaky hands start doing so, But it hurt you that you only entered the tip.

But all of a sudden he thrust up and slammed himself whole. You moaned because of both pleasure and pain.

"C'mon, Ride it. Do I have to do it all myself again?"

You immediately follow him as you start to ride him, slowly. You fasten up your phase and his hands hold your waist for control.

Eventually you got tired and he took control again. He gripped your waist and started bouncing you on his dick.

You both moaned in unison as you both chase your high.

"C-close!" You tell him, Not long after, Both of you came..

-

You woke up, Legs feeling sore. You look around your surroundings to find Jungwon laying beside you and hugging you by the waist. Still peacefully sleeping.

-

a/n: this is my first ever fic, so I'm sorry if it's not too well written as I'm still practicing my skills! But I hope you enjoyed the ficcc, pls also leave suggestions on how to improve my writing :,) thanku!!!

-

[co-mixed]

The Tragedy of Robin(s)

 After catching up on the most recent Batman stories, especially Batman vs Robin by Mark Waid and Knight Terrors by Joshua Williamson, I’m seriously rethinking my whole impression of Damian Wayne. Not a secret, I’d always considered him to be a little annoying gremlin who desperately needed both affection and a serious talking-to from his parents. He also lost the parent lottery, having to be sired by the two people least capable of either.  

This whole text is pretty much my opinion based on what I’ve read so far and I haven’t by any means read everything, so feel free to disagree, but remain polite about it. 

Mommy issues 

Yes, under all of Damian’s bravado, there is an unloved child. Because it’s really easy to forget that he is just a child, despite his neverending threatening to kick everybody’s ass and often succeeding in that. 

Talia is arguably worse than Bruce. From an early age, Damian was forced to prove himself because of some made-up empire he was probably going to inherit if his mommy dearest chose one day to give up the reigns. That and showing up occasionally to remind him that he’s not good enough is all Damian is getting from her. 

That also explains the kid’s obsessive desire to inherit Batman’s cape and cowl. In Batman vs Robin, that desire gets exploited by the forces of darkness, turning the kid’s dreams into actions. Something that conscious Damian is trying to fight. 

But we aren’t here to criticize Talia’s parenting failures (she sucks), we are here to criticize Bruce’s parental failures. 

Daddy issues

From day one Bruce had no idea how to relate to his son. I’d say it wasn’t the shock of even having a biological son, as much as his incapability to care about someone more than he cares about his mission. That’s his horrific self-programming that his kids (all his kids) are fighting through. Some are more successful like Dick. And thanks to Tom Taylor for reminding us of that with every issue of his Nightwing run. But Dick actually had a loving family, so when Bruce took him in, he already had the fundamental understanding of being a good person. That’s at least partially why eventually he manages to build healthy relationships with people, even with Damian. 

Jason is more of an example of what happens after Bruce’s parenting. Bruce still can’t decide whether he was a mistake and he just trained him to be a good murderer. I’ll make it easy for him - yes, the mistake was on you, Bruce. No, it wasn’t the fact that you trained him.

But seriously, after three attempts Bruce still has no idea how to talk to a kid. 

Alfred did, and that helped Bruce’s older sons, then Dick and Alfred did what they could for Damian. Because let’s face it, after Alfred’s death, the closest thing to a parent Damian has is Dick Grayson, and he lives all the way in Blüdhaven (which is still closer than Alfred). 

Not a bat situation 

I’ve come to the conclusion that Batman knows how to communicate with Robin, so on this level his relationship with Damian seemingly works. But Bruce can’t build a normal healthy one with his son. And that sentiment was verbalized by Damian himself during the Knight Terrors event. The kid understands it, while Bruce himself does not, therein lies the tragedy.

It’s even worse when you see the numerous times Damian had supported his father as if looking for his approval. Again, he might claim he doesn’t need it, he does (thanks, Talia). 

That’s a pattern 

Batman has a serious problem with people. Batman vs Robin was a pretty clear reflection of that, especially when Bats confronted all of his former Robins (and four of his sons). His regrets regarding all of them were not without reason and it becomes clear later that all of his kids hold some resentment against him (especially Jason).

The way I see it, his favorite Robin is Tim (he makes it clear during Failsafe and the Bat-Man of Gotham) his favorite son is Dick (he was the one who managed to heal and not constantly bug Bruce about what he'd done wrong). Unfortunately for Damian, their existence will always make him feel competitive. 

Once again, that’s fully on Bruce. Not on Batman, because I think that Damian can handle not being ready to replace Batman, but on Bruce, because he doesn’t feel the love. I’m not saying Bruce doesn’t love him, but if he does, it’s in his own way and he’s not communicating it well. He always pawns Damian off on more affectionate people. 

What is love

Meanwhile, Damian truly loves his father. Enough to run around following him, sit at his bedside while he’s taking a really long nap, enough to side with him over the rest of the family (I’m still in the middle of Gotham War). That’s what children do when they want their parents’ love and attention, they try to be perfect. 

All of that makes me feel so so bad for Damian. I actually don’t hate him, even if I like to jokingly say that I do when he starts acting like a brat. But he deserves unconditional love and neither one of his parents chooses to understand that. 

For his sake, I hope he grows up and manages to grow and move past this (probably with the help of his family like Jason and Tim did during Knight Terrors). And when he’s old enough and wise enough to make his own decisions, I hope he sticks Bruce and Talia in a nasty old folks’ home.  

[northstarco]

˚.  ﹙ 㶌 ﹚ ☆  127 O.VIEW : home is wherever ilichil happens to be, that’s what niko’s unfamiliar conscious tells him anyway. he’s naturally stubborn, yes, but he will always recognize 127 as a collection of unbreakable bonds, no matter which member, they all speak to him in some particular regard. though they’re much exuberant and often make him question their extent of sanity, he has an excessive amount of love he’d rather die before utter the existence of. they’re always his first batch of people as choices to hang out with, through occasional mutters he might seem like your typical tsundere stereotype who desperately wants to appear as if he hates his friends, but he doesn’t, he really does showcase his love for them much more apparently than he even realizes, much to his very own dismay.

쟈니 & 니코 ╱ YOUNGNI

okay so when you take aggressively affectionate tall fucking only child and emotionally repressed daddy issues ridden eldest child you get johnny and niko, glued together in the practice room on a random morning in 2011 and bonded by fate ever since. if that description sounds over the top than congratulations! their relationship is not that much different. they are both over the top whenever you stick them in a room together, either going at each other’s throats or silently feuding over something. their relationship is basically arguing, poking at one another whenever they need something to do, bickering then holding hands in the next frame.

the beginning of their relationship was much easier to digest than whatever the hell they have going on now, johnny basically taught niko the ropes, or just sort of dragged him around whilst 16 year old niko blinked with his huge brown eyes and nodded at whatever he said though his korean was iffy. nevertheless, they bonded quickly over shared interests and the fact that johnny was niko’s extroverted side for a good three years until the other found his footing.

despite the fact that he wasn’t initiated into the foreign swaggers (he’s still the slightest bit pissed over that one), johnny is niko’s older sibling standin, equally as annoying and protective over him. shit, his parents just treat niko as their own and johnny has his own cute little pact with niko’s own siblings. they’re each others support pillars but they will never admit that because they’re in some little competition where they try to not admit anything to each other.

the two are always around the other, whether it be niko popping in on somewhat regular instagram lives and the two just waltzing into each other’s places like “heyyy!”. yes they bicker over the dumbest of things, but they are extremely entertaining. interactions between them in 127 content are always gold, they could sit in the same room and remain silent yet everybody would eat it up because they’re just.. entertaining. they are basically lloromannic from sanrio, an arguably devilish pair though adorable once you squint.

태용 & 니코 ╱ TAENI

niko has some strange emotional attachment to taeyong he won’t really divulge anything to anybody about. similarly to the prior member, taeyong is also sort of an older sibling standin for niko, who was so scarred by being obscurely unconditionally loved that he almost avoided the older for a whole entire year until finally allowing the mountains of affection to fall atop him. taeyong is home, a warm hug niko won’t shy away from, he possesses the good kind of affection, he’s allowed several overwhelming hugs and kisses whilst the other members (haechan) pout over niko’s distance towards them.

it’s not that niko was scared of taeyong per say.. but every time he says that his limbs begin shaking so he’s clearly not all in the clouds about that. he would literally avoid the older like the plague, hiding behind johnny with the worst of excuses as to why he couldn’t talk to him at all. he was so much more older, seemed more experienced, just appeared so unreachable, he was clearly a bit anxious over all of that. it took him a whole entire year after the two had joined sm for him to actually sink into the normalcy which came with taeyong, an astounding degree of affection fit with that mother like nagging he’s gotten accustomed to.

basically, taeyong is the parental figure always ready to nag. it’s not as if niko’s mother isn’t in his life, she is, taeyong simply filled that role without realizing it. it’s the typical things; playful nagging and pestering, impulsively asking him if he’s eaten (and if he hasn’t, he’ll cook for him even with pushback), the abrupt bouts of affection he’ll just give him during the day. taeyong basically has an eye for everything niko, whenever he shatters something (his phone.. always his phone) it takes an earful from the older for him to actually replace it. taeyong shoves mountains of affection atop him and niko takes it because he truly doesn’t mind it from him.

niko looks up to taeyong a lot, admiration for him is steeped very deeply into his person. he finds such company nice because no matter how cheesy his puns are, taeyong always offers him laughter.

悠太 & 니코 ╱ YUKO

they are a severely underrated pair, truly each other’s number one supporters who communicate through strange gestures and often weird shared interests. if yuta is hangyodon, then niko is itaro, yes, a frankly compatible fish and squid. they began as a pretty silent match, both reserved enough with their little knowledge of korean, debut bought little interactions but few exchanged smiles and praises from one to the other. what really brought them together was dinner, and many shared likes. for starters, sci-fi movies, comic books, endless scrolling over forums which had fans detailing comments on them, and baking.

basically, they just love to sit around and talk. you can catch them in several videos simply muttering, niko throwing his head back at yuta’s several abnormally begun jokes. they can sink into conversation over anything, jewelry, anime, cake, plushies, alcohol, soccer, literally anything. they’re like two best friends during sleepovers who go back and forth droning over everything that can come up during conversation, and they somehow always agree on (mostly) every single thing. yuta is probably one of the only people niko can shop with anxiety free, it’s because they are pretty much on the same wavelength for about 97% of the time.

the two were roommates for a while, so by the time early 2021 rolled around and niko moved out, yuta crashing at his place became regular. susi is so used to his presence that his lap becomes her second bed and they were sharing clothes like.. bi-regularly. occasionally people murmur about couple allegations, and they completely fuel such theories, giggling like teenagers as they scrolled twitter looking at collected evidence. they have it all, matching hats, bracelets (with charms they made together), keychains, shirts, they bounce off each other in their own strange little way.

they’re always ready to rally behind each other, just so defensive you’d almost think they were a couple, dinner dates the cherry on top. despite them basically being married, they are much overlooked, even with the insistence by nctzens that they gotta be doing something suspicious, either way, they’re kinda in their own arena of friendship, especially with keychains. yuta got niko little twin stars merchandise and he about cried. of course he’d never admit any of that, crying who?

도영 & 니코 ╱ DONI

okay.. okay.. save doyoung from niko now. it seems the younger has one mode around the older vocalist: public nuisance. he simply thinks it’s so fun to watch the other have to stifle his very anger, something akin to a meddling younger sibling who can get away with anything. doyoung thought he would’ve escaped niko after the 7th sense unit wrapped up promotions, but then limitless came around, and the other was back terrorizing him for as long as they would remain groupmates. every single time niko sits beside doyoung the older quite literally appears to begin praying, ‘can’t he just go easy on me?’

sometimes doyoung wants to punch him, truly, he has the patience of a saint, and though niko is typically silent in the corner, every so often he pitches in to make sure the older isn’t let off the hook. it isn’t always one sided, it can also be reciprocated sometimes. they’re like johnny and niko except they’re cosplaying as a disgruntled married couple with haechan in the middle as their child of divorce, basically, they argue so seriously the members kinda can’t help but silently sitting backs and watching. don’t be fooled, they are both great actors, or are they.. who knows?

despite frequently butting heads, they are practically attached by the hip. they’re the kind of duo who fight whilst holding hands, insult each other in the middle of an extremely tight hug. niko won’t ever resist a good moment to pick fun at doyoung for crying, but of course he’s going to comfort him in tandem with that, he’s not a monster, you know? he may just be doyoung’s biggest fan, he’s buying all the albums and going to all the fansigns and writing poems about his vocals. just kidding!.. just kidding..

niko will never allow doyoung to forget anything embarrassing, but they do love each other, in their own weird little way. it isn’t always heated between them, sometimes they just have their silent moments where they lean on each other for bouts of minutes until the members have to force them to talk. they simply understand each other, communication simple even without words, it seems niko just enjoys becoming someone much more exuberant around him. in a way, they’re kinda like the magical twin comets, same age, mostly same feelings.

재현 & 니코 ╱ YOONI

according to every single 127zen in the history of the universe, niko and jaehyun have beef, they swear those two hate each other, that they’re distancing themselves from each other on purpose and are fighting behind the scenes in music bank. it really has never been that serious, they don’t hate each other at all, but they love acting like they do to fuel the several nctzen conspiracy theories. they got off at a rough start when they were trainees because of a couple of differences, and they avoided each other like the plague for the months coming up to the 7th sense being released. they weren’t even trying to be slick initially, jaehyun would walk into the room and niko would make up some bullshit excuse to scurry out of the room.

it wasn’t hate, just a mutual dislike they couldn’t exactly get over. it took taeyong (and johnny, but more on niko’s part) stepping in to get them to make up, or at least be in each other’s good graces so that their debut would be easy enough. they both apologized, and got over it. it did take them both a while, but they finally did establish some form of friendship despite their equal amount of awkwardness. they smiled at each other, little talking yet enough of an easy time with one another. they truly did become closer after 127’s debut, spending late nights giggling over stupid jokes that of course only they would find funny.

so why do they seemingly have active beef and are engaging in fights behind the music bank stage? well niko just said something which got taken out of context, said once in 2017 vlive that he and jaehyun weren’t the “most compatible back in the practice room” and people simply ran with the shit. honestly, they find it absolutely hilarious, they try to feed into it as much as they can, overdramatizing predebut stories to watch fans go wild with assumptions that are nothing of the truth.

truly? they get along just fine, they’ve gotten past their differences and spent a crazy amount of time together considering how much they like to keep up the hatred act. sometimes niko will just drag jaehyun out to explore food stalls out on the streets, and the younger pretends to be annoyed while hiding a smile the whole entire time. they have both very much failed at sustaining the whole ‘mysterious idol’ persona, they’re silly with no care in the world!

정우 & 니코 ╱ NIWOO

when jungwoo joined 127, niko thought it would all be fine. he was cute, shy, occasionally talkative but he made little noise. it did not end up being fine. it’s not like jungwoo was planning his murder or anything, he was simply much more of a random person than the other expected. basically, their relationship is jungwoo does or says something pretty strange while niko just stares like an off-put mom saying “that’s nice sweetie..” though his smile indicates anything but. in the beginning, jungwoo reminded niko a lot of himself, so it was an easily blossoming friendship.

now.. they are very much chaotic. every time jungwoo calls niko to ask him yet another stupid question at one in the morning the older longs for the courage to actually shut him up, he honestly finds it cute. jungwoo trusts niko with a lot of things, he can easily divulge things to him, sometimes he has trouble expressing certain emotions, and niko is understanding enough that he won’t chuckle at any of that. jungwoo is definitely head junis, nobody else is allowed to fight him on that because he constantly makes niko say it himself, whether completely in his will or not.

they are always doing some strange shit, niko will 100% always drive whenever in a car with jungwoo because he’s afraid of his odds when the other begins driving, gripping onto that fucking seatbelt for life! sometimes they’re just caught out at bakeries having some crazily serious discussions over macaroons or sugar cookies. occasionally, when niko lets his guard down, you can catch none another than kim jungwoo just snuggling up against him, arms linked or hands held or they’re simply hugging.. well more of jungwoo squeezing the shit out of him while niko just stands there.

most of their relationship is simply jungwoo talking niko’s ear off with several obscure factoids and the other nodding. they are very much two sides of the same coin yet also much of opposites, like pinkylilrose and rioskypeace.

마크 & 니코 ╱ MARKO

they’re lowkey soulmates but also don’t call them that because they’re fighting currently.. or something i don’t know. niko and mark are best friends. point blank. they try to say they aren’t but they are, they’re so terrible at not being friends that it’s kind of funny to watch them try to grasp at things to argue about. they have many things in common in particular, a whole list could be made really, but it’s music in specific that made them grow much closer. the whole trainee process took a similar toll on them, and though niko had little of the older member wisdom somebody like johnny possessed, mark was drawn towards him due to their similar situations.

so there began their cute little relationship, despite mark being a prolific science despiser, niko being the opposite, it was as if they were meant to find each other or something. especially during their days as trainees, mark says having niko around in those early years really helped push him forward, that the older is much more encouraging than he enjoys appearing. they spent a lot of predebut time together, whether it be just talking about missing home or simply creating random rhymes in the stuffy trainee dorms. their old tradition used to include sneaking out for ice cream, yes despite the crazy dieting, they kept it to themselves as their own pinky promise (niko would never let mark pay for it, though).

niko sort of keeps mark in check, he’s got a lot on his shoulders, scattered schedules and little hours dedicated to himself. despite the clear hypocrisy, niko is truly always the first person to notice when mark’s off, whenever they get even the slightest break niko always just offers his place as a comforting space. sometimes mark doesn’t want to talk to the members, he’s disgruntled and overworked and can’t bear to do anything, so niko offers him a comfortable air of silence whilst they watch all the spiderman movies again for about the seventh time.

sometimes niko bakes for him and mark watches on like he’s some sort of magician (“dude, you gotta teach me your ways”), they really do fight just to fight. mark is to niko what niko is to johnny, that one younger sibling figure he’s truly unaware where they came from, yet he’s glad is there either way, even if he’s a little annoying.

해찬 & 니코 ╱ NIHAE

so basically, niko is one of the only members haechan will willingly let off the hook, that may be because he’s got a slight fear of him but shh! you didn’t hear that from me. niko met haechan through mark, who wasn’t exactly as fond of him at the time, but the older adored the little menace. something about him and his cute face despite the constant complaints mark gave about him was simply.. interesting, so by the time 2016 rolls around, haechan thinks niko is easily one of the coolest people in the world. australia simply seemed so far away, everything about him, his demeanor, his way of carrying himself, it all just seemed much more amazing than it really was.

niko was really just your run of the mill antisocial teenager who had a habit of making friends with his juniors, he had no idea how anybody could see him as.. cool, but he took it in stride either way. he hung on niko’s arm for most of their early debut years, and niko just found him absolutely adorable. yeah he was a little annoying but niko was spared all of that due to a beautiful thing called favoritism. sometimes, they even gang up on the others, watching as they grew more and more irritated with each moment of teasing. #savedoyoungfromnihae.

they have many cute little things they do, haechan calls him “niru”, a combination of his name and badtz maru, who the other says niko is much alike to, so in response to that niko calls him “haena-maru”, after hana maru. haechan is basically his baby, niko defends him with everything, whenever the members yell at him niko has to put his foot down, it’s like he gave birth to him or something, there’s a mere four year age difference yet he acts as if he was at the hospital on june 6th 2000. they have matching bracelets and are always ready to hop on overwatch together, they constantly have time for each other, it’s cute how much they care.

niko has seen haechan at his many highs and lows, sometimes the idol personality drains him, he quiets down, and his social battery is drained, his limit reached. niko is often good at bringing him back to reality, sometimes he gets too energetic, then there’s a hand on his shoulder, a silent beckoning for him to take it easy. haechan will always tease him for it (“aww, you care so much about me right hyung?”), but he’s very appreciative of niko for everything he does do, silent or otherwise.

[lunar-serpentinite]

very incomplete thoughts because im just pulling shit out of my ass at this point but honestly i feel like dark!harry would be dangerously nihilistic. the stress and heavy burdens of being the Chosen One who is also being unheard by the rest and slandered every other day or so would drive him to one final breakdown before he decides he has finally had enough

we know that harry is the type to feel a lot. he is regularly driven by his emotions and his morals and his wishes to actually help. so when he's had enough, he could just straight up not feel anything. after all, his feelings dont really matter in the big picture. why should he bother anymore ?

now we know that suppression of Magic, whether through conscious choice or to cope with abuse, can result in an Obscurial so it won't be too far of a stretch to say that excessive suppression of emotions can also result in something as dangerous for wixen.

so picture this : harry's had enough. he wants out of literally everything he's going through right now. and in the midst of his distress and slowly fraying sanity, he wishes hard enough to "stop feeling anything" that his own Magic obeys

harry goes from feeling too much to feeling nothing at all . there's a void in his chest where his emotions should be, and he finds that it really doesn't bother him at all. he feels the most peaceful he has been in a long, long while. the void in his chest grows larger still and slowly, he begins to think that nothing really matters in the end.

he thinks about everyone. they tout and scream to the rooftops that hes the chosen one, that hes supposed to stop voldemort, that he is destined for greatness. but then they treat him like a child, like a fragile little thing who cant do anything right. they dont believe a lot of what he says, and would rather be swayed by the words of dumbledore or the prophet or skeeter. he doesnt really matter all that much to them, he supposes. hes just their little symbol of hope, there to sit pretty and wait til the final duel.

well. none of that anymore. they can deal with voldemort by themselves. doing anything for or against them would mean nothing anyways. he's an immature child in their eyes anyways, so an immature child he will be.

harry doesn't notice that the void hes been feeling in his chest has started to affect him and his surroundings as well. it's like he has become a small black hole, draining the life and the magic of everything around him. and if someone comes close enough to him, he'd be draining their emotions as well.

he and his magic have effectively squashed any and all feelings he has besides apathy. all he cares about now is getting the rest he deserves and letting the world fall to ruins. they can figure it out, he thinks, not like they ever needed him anyways. and i feel like with the absence of his emotions and morals, he'd be more inclined to using crueler spells just to keep his peace.

he still has a bit of his dramatic flair so harry probably lays himself to rest somewhere like beneath the rubble of his family's home, which is the closest he can be to "resting with his parents beneath the snow". he pulls a bella swan, lays there all numb and uncaring, and lets the world pass him by

meanwhile, the void in his chest grows larger and stronger still. it feeds from the remains of harry's emotions and the vitality of the environment around them. eventually, it grows enough that it becomes capable of manifesting outside of harry and it becomes somewhat like an Obscurus, shapeless and near invisible but capable of dealing large amounts of damage. however, it stays in place and only acts when it perceives a threat to harry's rest, which is pretty much anything that moves within their vicinity

potter cottage becomes a little bubble of nihility. it eats at anything that comes near and people become horribly numbed if they come too close. sometimes harry can hear his friends call out to him from within, but hes getting the rest he has been wanting for so long. they can figure things out by themselves.

so

yeah

that's the thought

[tyrannuspitch]

another thing that's really uncomfortable about the comics backstory is that it's very often like. 1. loki was adopted as a ~10 year old, not a baby, and therefore 2. his heritage was never even remotely a secret. and in this circumstance i feel like thor being abusive (esp from the start) is... so much worse?

like, in the mcu with its secrecy and early adoption, you can say that if thor mistreats loki, it's at least partly because he's semi-consciously picking up on their parents not treating loki as equal, but he doesn't know why, so it's just How Things Are (and always have been, literally as long as he can remember!). like, loki being abused is normalised at a fundamental level for thor. and if odin and frigga don't intervene, well, they've already proven their willingness to treat loki as inferior by lying to him his whole life. the mcu is definitely its own kind of horrifying, but it's a quiet and insidious kind, and you can see how the characters could be gradually led into worse and worse actions over time.

whereas in comics canon, where everything is out in the open from the start... thor mistreating loki just looks like straightforward, conscious prejudice. even if he claims otherwise, it's really hard to believe that space racism ISN'T a factor. sure, you just decided your adopted-brother-from-a-completely-dehumanised-enemy-species is your inferior for... no reason. convincing! and the parents not intervening is like... they don't even have anything to hide??? why would you even be hands-off about this unless you literally, consciously want it to happen? it's literally just like. "hey 'dad' you know the boy you told to treat me like a brother last week? well he isn't doing that. he's using me as a punchbag instead" "oh. how sad, my son." "are you going to tell him to stop???" "no."

like, when mcu thor calls loki his brother i believe him. i really do think that mcu thor truly and deeply sees loki as his brother, and himself and loki as fundamentally tied together (to a potentially unhealthy extent), etc etc. but sometimes when comics thor calls loki his brother it's like... okay, but you've never treated him like a brother. you have spent your whole life punishing him for being different at every opportunity. but now that you want to scold him, you're brothers? this is not love! this is an excuse!!!

like. i may not be being entirely fair to the comics here; there may be far better and more complex versions i haven't found yet. but just based on my experience so far... in the mcu, "they hurt you but they're your family" is this elaborate manipulative mind game where everyone involved really does love each but finds ways to justify the abuse anyway, so love and abuse are inseparable and often expressed by the exact same act, and this causes fundamental damage to the sons' concept of what love even is, whether love without abuse is *possible*, whether ceasing to love "family" is *possible*, etc etc... whereas in many of the comics, "they hurt you but they're your family" is like. those are literally the only two things they do. they hurt you, and then they SAY you're their family to stake ownership while doing absolutely nothing to prove their alleged love, not even the barest scraps of affection, ever. like come on??? i would cause the apocalypse over and over too!!!

(and as i said before - the situation being bad doesn't make the writing bad. but this continuous hand-wringing and pretending that thor's part in it is more complicated and more sympathetic than they ever actually show... does.)

[actualbird]

hi zak! I saw the tags you left on a reblogged post about Luke and suffering in relation to catholicism and that made me think. one of my classmates used to mention "the catholic guilt" (particularly about having desire), and I just thought it fits Luke so well. He felt so guilty about loving Rosa (and leaving her alone...) for so long T-T. Also, I'd love to hear more of your thoughts about catholic and filipino luke if you'd like to write about it!

irt to these deranged tags i left on this post abt suffering as salvation and luke forever ago, screencapped below for reference

hello hello! sorry this response took Ages but now im finally down to answer this so....

//steeples hands.....is luke pearce catholic coded? to Me, yes, and ive been casually throwing around this concept ever since 2021 HAHA. the filipino bit is actually just me projecting, so i wont go too much into that, but the religious bit Is something i wanna talk about. and i apologize in advanced for how long this response is gonna end up being

quick disclaimer b4 i start tho: im Not a theologian or an expert in religious theory, im just some guy who went through over a decade of catholic school and lives in the philippines, a primarily catholic country. this whole response is not saying "catholicism bad." it's more the institutions from where we experience catholicism from can twist it into something harmful, and i got to experience that first hand and how it affects one's view of themselves

ANYHOO, LET'S START FROM THE BEGINNING

like....the Beginning beginning

part 1: in the beginning, adam and eve did an oopsie so now we're all saddled with original sin (i swear this is important to luke pearce, bear with me)

quick recap on those who are unfamiliar: in the book of Genesis, god told adam and eve not to eat from the tree of knowledge. and then they did. this was the first ever sin in the history of humankind, and it is inherited by all humans through birth. so like, yay, happy entrance into the world, newly born baby child! you are guilty of sin already. this original sin is most usually absolved though through baptism, so it's not too much of a problem. but what im interested here is less of the nitty gritty semantics and more of the concept this all puts forth:

that under catholicism and similar denominations, a child, somebody who has not done any wrong at all, is inherently tainted by sin

now, the Good reaction to sin or any wrongdoing one has done is to recognize it and to atone for forgiveness. and within the "recognition" part is where guilt lies. functionally, guilt has a purpose. it makes us realize that we had done something wrong, it makes us feel remorseful, and it adds motivation to atone, to turn a new leaf, and to be better. in healthy amounts, guilt is useful and a natural part of being conscious over the things you do. and in unhealthy amounts, guilt is agonizing.

but thats for stuff you actually Did.

if the thing you are guilty for isnt actually something you were responsible over, the guilt cant do anything to make any of it better. you cant be a better person from it, because you didnt even do it. it just sits there, making you feel horrible for something that was out of your control. but because guilt is a Good thing to do, it doesnt matter if it's functional or not. it needs to stay. because it's Good, and the sin youre saddled with (whether or not you were responsible) is Bad

now let's bring in luke

luke's parents died when he was very young. this led him to living with mc's family, and a huge insecurity and fear he had from the beginning was that he felt guilty for burdening them, for stealing the love and care from mc's parents when that shouldve been for mc alone. the story SSR Shape Of You goes into this particular childhood experience extensively (and i highly reccommend it to anyone who hasnt read it yet), and tells us that his guilt was so bad that he wanted to run away and even erase himself from existence.

but luke didnt even do anything wrong

at the time, he was a child. he had no bearing whatsoever in the accident that killed his parents, he had no sway over who wouldve ended up looking after him, he had no control over the situation. like a newborn baby born under catholic doctrine, luke finds himself inherently tainted by and guilty for the circumstances that landed him to where he was.

this kind of pattern is going to follow him for the rest of his life, and the concept of inherent sin and inherent guilt begins to evolve. if luke can find himself guilty for things out of his control, then he can also find himself guilty for things that arent even sins in the first place

key example: love

like you said, luke feels immense guilt over loving mc. but why? love is the opposite of a sin, afterall.

it's just a sin when luke does it. because luke sees himself as inherently bad, and sees mc as inherently good. he sees himself as unworthy of her or someone who will just bring pain into her life, and causing pain someone you love is bad. if love is the knife he uses to hurt someone he loves, then that love is bad. that love should not be realized, and luke should feel guilty for even yearning for her.

by this point i think it's obvious that original concept has become twisted and overly punishing, even cruel. and thats because:

a lot of institutions teach catholic doctrine in an unhealthy and harmful manner. this is why many catholics and lapsed catholics experience The Catholic Guilt(TM). what was originally a pretty reasonable thing gets blown out of proportion from the places we learn these things from, and then getting exposed to this for majority of our lives lets it worm its way into our brain where it'll tend to stay

and if one's brain also has a tendency for self hatred and/or mental illness........well. it all gets worse.

it's clear in canon that luke is uhhhh not the most mentally well individual. his guilt is so overwhelming that it's the driving force in so many of his choices, stories, and experiences. which is big reason #1 for why luke just seems so catholic to me, because of the sheer intensity of his guilt and how he sees himself as inherently bad and unworthy.

but in the roadmap of sin, thats only the beginning. because the process goes:

sin (bad) -> recognition of the bad aided by guilt (good) -> atonement to become better (good)

which leads to big reason #2

part 2: suffering, pain, and misery as atonement

it's important to note that catholicism does not posit that "suffering is good", but there is a clear pattern of veneration for people who endure suffering under noble causes. many, many people in catholic history have been martyred (and many also sainted), one of the biggest examples being jesus himself.

pain is not good, but someone who chooses to take it on for good reasons (self-sacrifice, martyrdom, putting others above one's self) or stays good in spite of all the pain they experienced (unwavering faith, a heart of gold), well, THAT person is good.

however, like a lot of stuff in catholicism, things get twisted into extreme variations because of how it gets taught or experienced. it doesnt take a genius to see how "people who endured pain for good reasons were brave and devoted people" can transform into "to experience pain is inherently noble" when you take into consideration that many sins (like, of the seven deadly sins variety, pride, sloth, lust, etc etc) are variations of indulgence.

specifically over-indulgence, yes, but there's a dichotomy now. here, in the list of Good Stuff are things that feel not-so-good, and over in the list of Bad Stuff are things that do feel good

bad stuff is a sin, and from part 1, sins are things you should be guilty for

and now, to feel good is also bad, so you should be guilty for that. which reinforces the concept that to feel bad is good.

congratulations, you've unintentionally glorified suffering and demonized pleasure! //sad trumpet noises

you can see this kind of thinking pretty clearly in luke pearce. there are the big examples like the previous one i brought up, where he feels so guilty for his feelings for mc. but it appears even in smaller casual situations, like in his 1st birthday event story. this moment was seared into my brain

"can i look forward to this?" is indicative of hesitating in the face of happiness. even something as mundane as anticipating a birthday surprise is something to be approached with caution, feels too good to be true, to be allowed, because feeling good is bad and luke doesnt see himself worthy of it

but okay, we're all guilty now of the horrible sin of enjoying life. what comes next? atonement, becoming better, growing from the bad to become good, right?

and what better way to cleanse one's self from the sin of feeling good but through the nobleness of enduring pain?

luke is guilty over the sin robbing burdening mc and her family -> thats okay he's leaving for college anyway! wont be able to burden them there -> oopsie the NSB happens but hey at least this lone wolf suffering is a great way to atone for his past sin -> oh god the guilt of abandoning mc though -> oh GOD the mission that killed everybody but him -> NEW ACHIEVEMENT: SURVIVOR'S GUILT ON TOP OF THE CATHOLIC GUILT! -> oh GOD he's even guiltier now of his feelings for mc because of his illness, he'll only bring pain to her, how selfish of him to have feelings like this, bad and wrong -> the best way to handle this is to stay away from her to let her live in peace (lacking the pain that luke will bring) and deprive himself of her who brings him joy (inflicting pain of separation onto sinner as punishment) -> the path to salvation (to being good, because only in being Good is someone worthy of love) is through constant suffering and endless self-deprivation

kinda insane how luke's self-perceived sins and self-inflicted sufferings gain compound interest of misery, but his spiral into self-loathing is littered with this kind of nonsensical "because i did [THING], i should deserve pain/NOT deserve happiness"

for luke, suffering became the mode of atonement, it became the solution for sin and guilt.

part 3: conclusion

to wrap this all up, i wanna make it clear that i dont necessarily think luke is like, catholic in the story. nor is even it a headcanon i have. it's more that the intensely self-punishing thought patterns luke has in relation to guilt and suffering are very, very familiar. it resonates in a way that is horridly relatable to people who have experienced these specific catholic experience woes, but it can also resonate in completely different ways to other people as well.

but given that....yeah. based on my own experiences, all this //gestures at too-long response, is why i keep using catholic language and imagery whenever i talk about luke. it's so familiar. he's so familiar. luke would not be out of place in a filipino catholic high school crying during a 3 day retreat

thanks for the ask!!!

[stargazer-sims]

All the questions (1-15) for Nikolai and Mishka please

@dandylion240 sorry this took so long! I had it almost finished and then forgot it was in my drafts, and it got pushed down by all the other stuff in my drafts... and yeah. Anyway, here you go!

I'm going to do both of them together, so I only have to copy-paste the question set one time.

Nikolai Pavlenko & Mikhail (Mishka) Vasiliev

What is your character's biggest fear, and how does it affect their actions and relationships?

Nikolai's biggest fear is losing his independence. So much of his self-identity is tied to teaching, helping and taking care of others, it's hard for him to accept the idea of needing to be taken care of by someone else. He's okay with interdependence, but he's afraid of a situation where he might no longer be able to care for himself and where he'd become mostly, or fully, dependent on other people looking after him.

Mishka's biggest fear is abandonment, which extends out to a real fear of simply being alone. He was never able to live alone and always needed to have a roommate after leaving his family's home. He doesn't like to go anywhere by himself, especially if he's never been there before, and when Nikolai travels, Mishka either has to stay with someone else or travel with him. He thinks his fear of abandonment goes all the way back to when he was a baby/toddler, when his biological mother would leave him and Vika alone in their apartment for hours and sometimes days at a time. He used to have major separation anxiety when he was a child (and he still kind of does, if he's being honest).

What is something your character is deeply passionate about, and how does it drive their goals and motivations?

Nikolai is deeply passionate about sports in general and figure skating in particular. He's highly competitive and he always wants to be the best he can be, which motivates him to stay fit an healthy. It informs his choices about exercise, eating and sleep. Unfortunately, it also means he can be stubborn once he makes up his mind, and sometimes he doesn't know when to quit.

Mishka is passionate about appreciating and understanding all living things. He loves animals, and despite being both anxious and shy, he's really a people-person at heart. He's soft-hearted and compassionate and genuinely wants to help everyone live their best life, including every animal. This has motivated him to get involved in volunteering with organizations such as an animal rescue and a community soup kitchen and thrift shop. Now that he's retired from his hockey career, he has more time to devote to his causes.

Describe a memorable childhood experience that shaped your character's personality or outlook on life

The thing in Nikolai's childhood that shaped his character and personality wasn't so much a specific event but really his childhood in general. Nikolai was raised by his grandfather just as much as by his parents (if not more so). Of all his guardians, he's always been closest to his grandfather, and he was greatly influenced not just by the way his grandfather raised him but also by the way he saw his grandfather treat other people. Grandpa is a genuinely kind and thoughtful person, and he loves to help and teach others, and Nikolai wanted to be like that too, whether by conscious choice or as a way of life.

A childhood experience that shaped Mishka's personality was being abused, neglected and ultimately abandoned by his biological mother. It caused him to have a deep-seated fear of the dark from being locked in a cupboard as a toddler, not to mention his fear of abandonment and of being alone. He's also afraid of needles (due to his biological mother injecting herself with drugs and then having very bad reactions), and he's afraid of people yelling at him (something his bio mother did far too often). Fortunately, he was adopted by his foster family, and they gave him the life he deserved, but he still has issues because of a lot of those things that happened. He's also grown up to value every living thing, and to do his best to make sure innocent and vulnerable people don't suffer the way he did.

What are your character's quirks or eccentricities that make them stand out from others?

For Nikolai, it's his hair. It's not really a quirk or eccentricity, but it is a characteristic that makes him stand out from others. One of his quirks that might make him stand out to the more observant person might be his obsession with wearing green clothes. The majority of his wardrobe is green, with the exception of shoes, jeans, and some black, grey or brown shorts and sweatpants, and it's unusual to see him in other colours.

Also not really a quirk, but Mishka is notable for having an overall physical appearance that doesn't seem to match with his personality. He embodies that older meme "looks like he could kill you but is actually a cinnamon roll". People who don't know MIshka well are often intimidated by him at first.

Does your character have any hidden talents or abilities that only a few people know about?

Nikolai can draw and is fairly skilled at it, but he doesn't really like to show off his art. He's self-conscious about it, so only the people closest to him know.

Mishka likes to knit and crochet, and he knows how to do basic sewing. It's not necessarily a hidden talent, but it's not something he talks about with most people, either.

What is your character's preferred way of coping with stress or difficult situations?

Nikolai exercises when he's stressed. He finds physical activity helps him release all his pent-up energy and lets him relax.

Mishka stress-knits. Making multiple hats and pairs of mittens is far better for him than some of his old anxiety-coping behaviours, such as not eating, or unconsciously pulling out strands of his own hair.

How does your character handle failure or setbacks? Are they resilient or easily discouraged?

Neither one of them cope well with setbacks initially, but they're both resilient.

Nikolai is stubborn and dedicated, which is a powerful combination when it comes to pushing through failure and heading for his goals. He's very goal-oriented, and although he might struggle at first when he fails at something or has a setback, he's never down for long.

Mishka is more prone to being discouraged, but not to the point of giving up. Where Nikolai is self-motivated, Mishka often needs at least a little encouragement to help him get up and keep going. It's not because he doesn't want to achieve the goal in question, but more so that he needs someone to affirm that he can do it and to validate his continued efforts.

Describe a significant relationship in your character's life and how it has influenced them.

Nikolai considers all his relationships significant, but one of the most important ones for him is with his former coach and 'bonus mom', Beth-Anne. She's one of the few people with whom he's comfortable showing his vulnerability (his grandfather, Mishka and Ginger being the others). He also credits Beth-Anne for saving his life, literally and figuratively, shortly after the accident that ended his competitive skating career. Her love and support helped him want to stay alive, and she was the one who helped him get his life back on track, and she steered him toward coaching as a natural next step for him. He loves coaching and he's forever grateful to Beth-Anne for all she's done for him. Now, his goal is to pay her kindness forward to someone else.

Mishka's most significant relationship is with Nikolai. He's made great strides in his personal growth because Nikolai supports him rather than judging him. Mishka is never going to be an extrovert or a particularly self-assured person, but thanks to Nikolai's help and encouragement, he's learned how to be more outgoing and confident, and he's learned that the world isn't nearly as scary a place as his own anxiety would want him to believe. He's learning how to trust others and how to make strong, lasting friendships.

What is your character's moral compass? What principles or values do they hold dear?

I would say this is very similar for both Nikolai and Mishka. They aren't religious but they would both think of themselves as moral individuals. Both of them value courage, kindness, compassion and honesty. They both also place a high value on loyalty, and family (or found family) loyalty in particular.

Imagine your character in a challenging moral dilemma. How would they approach it, and what choice would they make?

The choice they'd make would really depend on the dilemma.

They'd both seek advice from someone they trust, and they'd both weigh up the case for and against each potential course of action. Both of them lean more toward being emotional decision-makers, but that's not to say they wouldn't give it serious thought. Mishka would struggle less than Nikolai would, because morality is a bit less nuanced in Mishka's worldview. Nikolai sees more shades of grey than Mishka does.

Is there a specific physical feature or item that holds special significance to your character? Why is it important to them?

Nikolai has a silver ring that was given to him by Beth-Anne, which has the word "forever" engraved on the inside. Beth-Anne has a similar one that she received from her former coach, Stan. Hers has the Latin inscription "per aspera ad astra" (through hardship, to the stars) on the inside. Eden also has one, given to him by Nikolai, which says "chase your dream". Nikolai hopes Eden might someday have a special student of his own to give one to. The inscription on Nikolai's ring refers to his first gold-medal win with Beth-Anne as his coach. He was going through a confidence crisis, after having three coaches in theree years, but he really bonded with Beth-Anne and this was the first glimmer of the shining career he'd hoped for. He wanted Beth-Anne to stay with him, and she promised she would continue to coach him and that she'd stay in his life forever if that's what he wanted.

Mishka's important item is his blue teddy bear (also called Mishka). It's important to him because he hadn't had a teddy bear or plushie since he was a young child, and really wanted one but was too self-conscious as a grown man to purchase his own. Self-consciousness about teddy bears isn't something Nikolai suffers from (he carries his through the airport), so he had no problem buying one for Mishka.

How does your character react to change or unexpected situations? Are they adaptable or resistant?

Mishka does not like change or unexpected situations. He's very routine-oriented and prefers to have lots of advance notice to prepare himself psychologically for things like travelling, having overnight houseguests, etc. Unfortunately, he doesn't always get the advance notice he prefers, and interruptions in his routine are very stressful for him. He's not resistant to change per se. He knows and accepts that change is inevitable. His problem isn't that he resists it, but more that he struggles to adapt. If he had his preference, nothing much would change, but he gets that change is often necessary and he tries his best to keep up even if he doesn't like it and finds it upsetting and challenging.

Nikolai isn't a fan of change either, but he's a lot more adaptable than Mishka. Nikolai has learned to be pragmatic about change. He may be upset or stressed in the moment, but he recovers quickly and is reasonably good at rolling with whatever happens.

Does your character have any recurring dreams or nightmares? How do these dreams affect them?

Neither of them have any recurring dreams

What is your character's preferred method of self-expression? Do they have any artistic talents or creative outlets?

Nikolai's favourite form of self-expression is dance (and skating)

For Mishka, it' s music. He's had classical vocal training and piano lessons, and he loves both. If you think you hear opera on the beach, it's Mishka. Loud Russian drinking songs? Probably also Mishka. Soulful ballad in the shower? Mishka.

Describe a defining moment in your character's life that marked a turning point or significant change in their path.

Nikolai's defining moment was the injury that ended his competitive skating career, and the weeks that followed his injury. Up to that point, he'd defined himself primarily as a professional athlete, and the loss of his ability to compete left him shattered for a while. He didn't know how to think of himself outside the context of his sport. His transition into coaching helped him see things from a new perspective, not just in his own life but in his view of the world in general.

Mishka hasn't had his defining moment yet, but it's coming. For him, it'll be becoming a parent.

[controlban]

some atsv thoughts...

i was a year older than miles when i saw the first movie when it came out. now the second movie has come out, and im 20, but its not my fault the sequel took nearly 5 years to release. ageing up is fine and exists for situations like these where a piece of media didnt maturate properly with its initial fanbase, and thus didnt allow for them to naturally grow in tandem. that's literally part of what fandom/fanfiction is for. fandom and fanfiction are for people to expand on their favourite piece of media and remake it into how they want it to be. the same thing happened with mcu!peter parker. i was abt 1-2 years younger than peter parker when homecoming came out, and i was 2-3 years older than him when no way home released.

whatever happened to just judging silently, and moving on with ur day? why are people being so mean and exclusive now?

obvi ped0s are fucking vile, but no one's being a ped0 here. go find ur common sense and thinking skills.

and i bet the same ppl who are being so weird abt this fandom rn are the same ones who think the movie has copaganda... what??? tell me ur a spiderman/marvel tourist without telling me ur a tourist, smh.

this movie uses typical spiderman tropes, and makes a meta analysis of miles morales as a character and whether or not he deserves to even be spiderman. the movie uses this as a narrative device. one of the core elements of spiderman is parental figure death/trauma, his/her relationship to the police/the city (often times by way of the police chief to represent all of the police, and/or by way of the media to represent public perception of spiderman, ie.: hero vs menace).

if we wanna only talk about movies, then all 3 live action series of spiderman have done the exact same thing. the comics do it even more.

but these ppl just watch movie, see ‘cop not intrinsically bad in this one’ and go ‘hey guys, this is bad right? am i right? please agree. when are we going to do something about it’. it feels like a very uninformed and performative analysis and reaction. and its always the people who aren't the ones being affected by police/police brutality that seem to put on the biggest show about supposed copaganda. how about you do something about the very real problems happening in the real world if you're worried abt copaganda? because i'll bet every dollar i have that every person that was bird calling on twitter abt atsv never set foot anywhere near any of the many protests that happened this year for the lives of those lost to the unjust american judicial system in just this year alone.

there are ways to consume media while also being smart. stop letting twitter raise u. you don't have to constantly perform for everyone to prove you're a good, socially-conscious person.

twist your head back on.

[seiwas]

hi sel!!! if i may... I would love to see katsuki / shouto as dads (moreso katsuki my beloved)🥺 ..i just think they're two parallels where they didn't get the love they wanted || needed as children 🥺🥺 and I would love to see that translate into them as parents.. 🍧 anon <3

hello 🍧 anon!! thanks for playing 🥺 i did a katsuki one here so i'll do shouto for this one!! (and i totally agree with youasdfjab that's why thinking abt them as parents makes me sooo emo)

papa shouto 🥺 shouto's always been reluctant to have his own kids; there are certain conditions that must be met before he can fully say that he's ready for them. and i think, ultimately, it all boils down to it feeling right. and when shouto finds you, falls in love, eventually gets you to love him too, things do feel just right.

so when your little boy is born into this world and he's the spitting image of shouto, you know he's going to be an absolute menace, just like his father is—they share the same blank gaze, the same big eyes that feel like they're judging every decision you could possibly make. the similarities end there, though, because everything else, he gets from you.

shouto is cautious in raising his child; he's more conscious of the way he acts and has learned a great deal from the family therapy sessions he went through back when touya was still in rehab. it's there that he learned the power of words and how they can make or break a child's life.

he makes time for his little boy, and though he's a little awkward with it still, he always tries to reassure him with simple phrases like "good job!" or "i'm right here". and he gives him freedom, first and foremost, to explore the world and do what he enjoys—to be able to be a child.

being present is all shouto wants to be, really. to be there for his son, whenever he needs him. so when it's way past bedtime and his little boy can't sleep? he lets him sneak under the covers between you and him, even though he knows you'll tell him off again about how it's time to teach him how to sleep in his own bedroom. he's there for most of his little boy's firsts—his first football kick, first basketball shoot, first 1km run. he tries out what his son tries, whether he's good at it or not (and oftentimes, he isn't, really. your little boy picks up musical instruments fairly quickly, but shouto can barely keep a beat steady).

shouto isn't very vocal with his affections, but you see the way he cares through the time he frees up for your family. and it means even more to you when you think about the fact that he's undoing decades worth of pain and turning it around so he can be better for the both of you.

[msommers]

1, 9, 16 for riya/victor, and bonus 3 for riya/leroux :)

i give u a kees on the nose muah thank u // development questions for couples

What, specifically, was the catalyst for their physical attraction (if applicable) to the other character? In other words, what in particular had them like “Oh, they’re...hot...”

it's cheating if i just put "lust at first sight" as the answer, i know it, but i do believe in my heart that it's absolutely true for victor lmao. how is he (a simple spoiled rich boy) supposed to see her (a beautiful girl in a striking dress) walk by giving him an overt once-over and a wink while attending a fête or smth, and not immediately be a goner? impossible. alexa play sucker by jonas brothers. on riya’s end, without a doubt it happened the first time she saw him spellcasting. whether it was during the previous tourney or simply catching a glimpse of him practicing some spell or other, he was a showman who knew he was hot shit and she ate that spectacle right up. mages are incredibly sexy in action and both riya and i will die on that hill

What do they think about commitment? Is a long-term partnership the goal? Are they thinking about building a life with their partner, or are they focused on the present?

neither of them were particularly focused on the Big Picture and that was part of why they worked so well together, much to the disappointment of parents on both sides. they could see into the future so far as their grand plans of exciting and romantic adventures, but most of their focus was on enjoying their time in the present to the fullest without worries of what was to come later. which is entirely why long-term commitment was never discussed between them, though it was probably assumed?? given how deep their feelings were. 

If they had the ability to just spend free time with their partner, what would they do? Would they go out or stay inside?

mmmmm i think 9/10 times they would choose to go out, which shows how hilariously privileged they were before things went downhill. they'd get up to a lot of things but their favorites would have been dancing, walking the markets, and frequenting their favored meal spots. the kinda couple that were always in contact of some kind while out together, but it was hard to tell if that was fully motivated by affection alone or if they also wanted to be a little obnoxious and in-your-face about their happiness and attraction to each other. (it was for sure both.)

By contrast, what was the moment that first made their ~heart~ Soft for the other person? Not necessarily a conscious realization of “I love this person,” but a moment that had them like “Oh...I adore them...”

hmm. i don't know if riya's reached an Adoration level with him. the closest thing i can think of here (so i can give an actual answer) would be closer to a moment of Appreciation. my memory won’t provide what scene was going down when it happened, but i do remember there being a moment during a session where as a player i realized oh, this guy is the only one here who is actively going through something similar to riya. because while everybody else in the party has already been exposed to such things through their own varied experiences, riya was having her worldviews torn apart piece by piece with each revelation of how bad things are with the templars and the circle (and the world outside of her tiny view in general tbh) beyond cumberland and she was not doing great. so yeah it sucks leroux had to confront that the system he’s trusted and worked in for however long was allowing—and even encouraging!!—terrible things to happen right under his nose, but it gave riya a moment of being able to recognize that she wasn’t alone in having her views and faith flipped on their head. and as a lil extent of that, his commitment to taking action after the revelations helped influence her own attitude towards the entire white spire magebreak :) 

on the other side, clearly leroux was besotted at first meeting. duh. just look @ that smile of hers, how could he not be (aka i won’t make assumptions on his end lmao)

[f0point5]

Oooooh my god the feels from this chapter!! The drama! The emotions! Those two babies 🥺

Whenever you make it sound like those two aren't supposed to end up together as a couple, I'm stuck thinking about it, wondering if you're right. Reading this part I honestly don't see them ending up with anyone BUT each other.

There is so much emotional damage and hurt for both of them and they do need to grow from this and learn how to really trust in a relationship, how to not fear a repeat of their own parents marriages, how to love and be loved and not run from this.

BUT seeing how y/n speaks about Elliot and their "relationship" and how she deals with that makes me believe she's never gonna trust any "normal" boyfriend the way she trusts in Max and their "relationship". She said she needs him. And we can all see how he needs her too. They can learn together. They understand each other's fears and they can work with that. They're already acting like a married couple, just without marriage and the intimate part of a relationship. But everything else is there, all the emotions, the trust.

I can see it. For the first time since you brought up the question whether they might possibly be better off as friends, I can clearly see how that doesn't have to be the way it goes.

The texts between Max and Daniel felt kinda illuminating... I've made this ask a couple weeks ago, how I felt like there's been sth happening in the past that made Max believe y/n wouldn't see him as more than a friend and him reacting to that in a way that made her believe he wouldn't see her like that.

Well... what if that something was the blind date that Clara set up for them? If what Daniel wrote is true to some extent, Max might have been a lil more keen on her back then than she'd thought he was. We only got her side of the picture, saying Max drew his line. But what if he didn't? What if she just thought he did and made it seem like she isn't interested either?

I think I remember y/n once said to someone that Max takes what he wants. But would he now? If he thought there's not a chance in hell she'd like him for more, he wouldn't try. No doubt. I'm not saying he's insecure in that department. But I feel like he's not always aware of how people perceive him. And he might not care about that, especially with anyone else. But be seems to care with her. If I think back to him telling her off for the Twitter posts, I wonder if it was him becoming all self-conscious because he's just not sure how to take those things from her. And if he really thought, like way back in the days, she's not attracted, doesn't see him as boyfriend material, whatever, it might explain his reactions to her publicly discussing how hot she thinks he is (let's put it like that).

Because he might start to think she means it. And it's probably a can of worms he doesn't want to open. Firstly, because of all the obvious reasons and their shared panic of relationship commitments. And secondly, because he might need to rethink the path he's taken with her all those years back, missed chances and all. And Max isn't one to ponder on the past.

Just my feelings about this part and some rambling... sorryyy for the long text again. 😅

Love your work!! 🧡

Right so. I waited until I had time to answer this because honestly it took me a while to formulate an answer for many reasons.

You. Be. Cooking. Like…yes. You and I are cooking from the same stove but you don’t have all my spices, if you catch my drift.

I keep going backwards and forwards whether I’m going to do a flashback part with the actual dinner date because on the one hand I want everyone to know what happened but on the other hand I like the idea that such a big part of their story is this mystery that the characters get to keep private. IDK ITS HARD. Because the story of why it wasn’t a date is illuminating but then also in the grand scheme of things doesn’t make too much difference.

I will say obviously it affected the trajectory of their relationship but there’s more to Max’s thought process than what happened in 2017.

Ugh your rambles always SO tempt me to reveal things that I want people to pick up on more but then it’ll make the plot slightly less surprising.

I will just say that Max and Y/N have known each other a LONG time. And Max has been a public figure for a LONG time. Both of things have shaped his perception of the situation maybe more than even he likes to admit. I mean…it’s kinda hinted very vaguely in a bonus part.

YOUR ASKS ALWAYS MAKE ME WANT TO SHARE EVERYTHING WITH YOU!!!

Keep cooking. It’s smelling good ;)

[abanbas]

COMPANION QUEST

Rook can find Sire on the coast of Rivain. Isabela will send a missive saying that there was a mage amongst their ranks that still hangs around and t has many skills but their knack for getting around Thedas, seemingly having a "guy" everywhere would probably help Rook's endeavors. She also mentions that he has a very odd power that could perhaps with intel and any matters concerning the fade.

Sire would require you to go fishing, to get a better feel of who you are. They will join you no matter what, though how they treat you to start with will be determined by your response to how long it takes to catch fish, how you bait them and your response of killing the fish for sport, eating the fish or simply letting it go.

Sire also reveals the bubbles, as being multi-faceted and able to do many things but it all requires a lot of energy and focus. That theres always a possibility that he could die due to his own bubbles killing him, but luckily he's trained hard and long to master conducting magic through them like any other medium and wielding the wild and pureness of the fade. He thinks it has something to do with the way Qunari dream, with the way they walk the fade in completely different way. Much like Elves seeing the fade completely different from other races. Sire's working theory is that, a sect of Qunari walked the fade the same way he does. Different times, Different places all at once while still remaining conscious and active in normal every day life. While on the quest he also reveals his love for architecture, saying that even a different doorknob can tell you something about personal taste or even reflect how a culture's environment affects such a small choice.

Another quest would be them talking about how architecture and gender are similar. Trans people change their bodies because of many reasons, some for person taste, some due to the environment they inhabit, cultural or just plain survival. Some trans people change nothing about the outside and focus completely on interiors. It all has meaning, nothing about a building, how its built or how it's furnished is just because, there's always some sort of meaning even if it is just because "they liked it this way". Rook will be given chances to relate to him, express their own identity whether cisgender or not (there will be more approval if you're transgender or any other minority as Sire himself is one and thus will relate to those who have a better grasp on the sociopolitical stranding that him even existing as a person, let alone a extremely versatile mage causing vigilante justice all across Rivain.)

There will be a couple beach/sauna/spy missions where it's purely for enjoyment, getting to know his bg background more and generally getting a better sense of his personality and reasoning for the fleety way he lives his life.

As for their Veilgaurd mission, he will bring rook to his village. Show them around and they'll say oh what a sweet and nice looking village. Sire will explain it wasn't always that way, it took years of him sending money back to his parents and the elders. That everything he loves is right there in Rivain. He doesn't love his country, he loves the wonderful and beautiful people of his homeland. He loves Rivain, he loves the seers and he loves his village. He wants them to life comfortably and for none of the people who take up a home there to ever be left out, even socially (Rivain is a very communal country, gold and what not don't matter much but for a medium sized village that's miles away from the bigger towns, it's difficult though they do manage it even before Sire. Sire just wants to make sure that the village is better than ok. There are A LOT of people who don't have their own homes there or even rooms in the village commune. He wants to change that, so part of his big goal is securing permanent help for his village and finding out more about qunari mages/history in general so)

Rook has to help him decide If after everything, He'll return and stay in his village as it's new elder or continue adventuring and become a myth in thedas, either one will have an epilogue of him find his true place and his past lives, but they'll be celebrated in different ways...SAFE HARBOR OR RAGING TIDE ( but safe harbor, sire accepts reincarnation and will be born again continuing his cycles or he can end them and absorb all the power and knowledge of his past lives venture forth as a new demi-gxd like figure.)

his ending slides show him with his village and rook (if romanced) or him in the pose of venus/ or david and gxd (if romances)

[franlon76]

life in the middle

Often I find myself in the middle of many things. Growing up in Lake Charles, LA my parents made a conscious decision to move us to a more diverse part of the city which was located in the center of town. The north side of town was predominantly African American. As you can expect the south side of town was predominantly Caucasian American. The schools and stores represented the same. Interstate 10 passes through the city and the deep richness of Louisiana fills your nostrils with the smell of seafood gumbo and boudin balls. As the middle child, my experience in life was smashed against learning on both ends. My older brother and sister would pave the way for me in many places. In sports, athletics, attitudes and accomplishments. Reflecting on the good, my upbringing was pretty darn good. There were struggles that I will eventually go deeper into in future blogs. This blog post is to share my story on how life in the middle has provided me a seat to see life from a wider and clearer lens.

In 1964 Alfred Alder’s theory suggests that birth order and the number of siblings affect a child’s potential. Adler’s theory was that middle children, due to their place in the family birth order, generally feel overshadowed. Since the first child is more likely to receive more responsibilities, and the youngest child is more likely to be pampered, the middle child has no clear role or status within the family. Whether Alder was right or wrong in his assumptions, the middle child syndrome has been something people debate about and even accept as reality. After forty-seven years of living, I’ve come to know that life is an opportunity. Over the many conversations we have, you will hear me say often that all crooked paths will be made straight. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths, Proverbs 3:6. Does diversity and lack play a role in Adler’s theory? Who did Alder test his theory on? Let this movie play out in your head…A family living in the middle of nowhere loses their father and the older brother must now run the farm. The older sister has to learn how to cook and clean, being that the mother now works at the nearby diner that pays very little. The middle child struggles because he or she can’t identify with their place in the family. The younger child relies on all of the older siblings for everything. Eventually, the middle child becomes the criminal mastermind or disturbed child who has all kinds of mental struggles. They go on a killing spree across the country to eventually die in a shoot-out with the police.

My movie analogy might be an over-exaggeration, but allow me to tell you my story.  My father did not die in the physical sense, but he did die in my heart.  My family was a middle-class African American family, life presented potential in every capacity, and in the blink of an instant, things changed.  I remember the warm Louisiana summers, and playing outside at night while my mother held conversations with the other neighborhood mothers.  Life was good, fun, and exciting.  One late night we were awakened by my mother as she rushed to the hospital to be with my father who had a serious injury while working offshore on an oil rig.  He fell from a platform as the crew scrambled to prepare for a serious storm heading into the Gulf of Mexico.  What was hiding in the lurk were the demonic spirits that wanted to attach themselves to my father’s family legacy.  Born in a large family, my father had 15 siblings. Many of them died from the alcoholic torcher to put on their bodies.

Now the battle begins.  My father was due workers’ compensation for his injury.  As the checks started to come in, the hidden monster struck.  Before the injury, my father would have your occasional beer.  He was never drunk in front of us, and he was often patient teaching us more than beating us.  With no financial aptitude, my father did not take advantage of the money he was given.   He squandered much of it, not on his wife and children.  But on others who had their hands out, and on burying his pain with the same devices that would eventually swallow his family.  My parent’s marriage started to deteriorate. With no work history from being a stay-at-home mother, she would find work in low-paying jobs.  My older brother would do several stints in and out of prison.  My older sister left home at a young age and got married.  At this point, I could live up to Adler’s theory and make excuses for the challenges.  Or I could continue to believe that God had a plan for me.  There was a time when my mother was working three jobs to provide for 4 children.  With all the lack we had to deal with, I attempted to sell drugs.  I remember the night driving with my brother in my mother’s little beat-up Ford Mustang.  I asked him for the opportunity to make some money.  I was tired of not having, seeing my mother battle life with what seemed to be no way out.  My brother refused to allow me to fall victim to the life he chose.   He insisted that I would make something of myself and accomplish getting a scholarship in football.  I would go on to just that.

Life in the middle does not limit anyone to a place of no identity. My parents, our parents did not rely on theories and concepts to instill in us the positive frame of mind to who we could be. Our parents constantly praised us, told us we were great, and that we could do great things. They did not have all of the answers or an understanding of Adler’s theory, but what they did know was that God has a great plan for all who believe in him. “For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” Jeremiah 29:11.  God has a plan for all of us.  My brother stood up for me.  He stood up by telling life that it would not swallow me up in what has swallowed so many others.  In my fatigue, and weariness I decided to give up and accept that life as it was.  But God!  My confidence has reignited.  I began to believe that God’s plan for my life would deliver us all out of the lack into a life of overflow.  It wasn’t something that happened overnight.  My mother continued to work hard to provide for us, and through every obstacle or challenge we continued to be escorted from glory to glory. 

My evaluation of life in the middle through the good and the bad, the ups and the downs come to the same conclusion.  Some of the safest places in life are in the middle of the most challenging situations.  In a hurricane, the safest place in the eye, the same is said about a tornado.  In the middle, there is a balance of life where you learn and grow.  What our parents put in motion was planting a small seed, and those seeds would eventually grow into something like a belief system.  Matthew 17:20 tells us, “You don’t have enough faith,” Jesus told them. “I tell you the truth, if you had faith even as small as a mustard seed, you could say to this mountain, ‘Move from here to there,’ and it would move. Nothing would be impossible.  I started this conversation with the perspective that if we allow other words to be spoken into our lives, we will become those words.  When there is an opportunity to become something other than what God says about us, we will fall victim to the words released in our lives knowing and unknowingly.  To fathers, the greatest thing you can do for your children is to speak into their lives.  Speak blessing over their futures, over their finances, over their future spouses, over every area in their lives.  Do the same over yourself, and your wife if you are married. I hope that as we unpack the many conversations, my testimonies become someone else’s breakthroughs.

Adler A. In: Problems of Neurosis: A Book of Case Histories. Mairet P, editor. New York, NY: Harper & Row, Publishers, Incorporated; 1964.

Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996, 2004, 2015 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved. https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Psalms+91&version=NLT

[best-magnus-archives-character]

Why do you think voting for Jon means being ok with how he treated Tim?

(major tma spoilers ahead)

i think the podcast does a very good job explaining that Jon distrusts and stalks his coworkers because 1. he just found out his predecessor was killed by someone In The Institute, not a monster like he had expected and 2. The presence of the NotThem literally gives him paranoia. like idk if maybe i misunderstood smth but to me it was clear the NotThem was a huge influence on his mental state at the time. Now is that an excuse? No, nor am i saying it is. In fact Jon himself feels guilt when he realizes what he did (or at least it seems to me like he does). And about the work power imbalance- I don't see how tumblr being "the pro worker website" would affect how individuals see a fictional character, but I do think its a disservice to your own point when you point out work dynamics when clearly the main problem was the betrayal of trust due to their friendship. You should google what gaslighting means, by the way. They are coworkers, yes, but they are also friends, maybe that's a wild concept to you but it happens in real life too. And that's what Tim's pissed about. Yes, Jon was able to do what he did because he's their boss, but the problem is the betrayal, and the "cause" for Tim's depression is the PTSD after the Jane Prentiss situation, not Jon. Jon adds salt to the wound, because the person who went through the worst of it with him and should understand how Tim feels doesn't trust him for similarly no good reason. Then he's depressed because of Sasha, and he doesnt have his friends anymore because Jon betrayed his trust and Martin is, from Tim's perspective, taking Jon's side. He's not depressed because of Jon although I'll happily admit Jon did not help at all.

That said, Tim lived a good life before what happened to Danny. He was even fine again for a bit before joining the Archives. His depression arc is painful, but he's not the only one struggling, and I don't think that's enough to say he's more mistreated. Tim gets the ending he wants, and it's as heartbreaking as it is cathartic. He suffers, yes. And it's fine if you think he has it worse than Jon, but to get mad at people for voting Jon because you think Jon is the monster who made Tim suffer seems like taking this a bit too seriously to me???

I mean just look at the whole story. I'd argue that anyone who lives ends up suffering more than the characters who die, simply because they're present for more bad things.

Jon's parents died when he was a child and he was raised by a grandma that mostly tolerated him. Then we have the Mr. Spider incident (whether that's worse than what happened to Tim and Danny is entirely up to personal opinion, I think the way Tim lost Danny is a much sadder story, but Jon seeing that as a child might've left a deeper scar)

It also marked him in a very literal sense, that his entire life from then on was controlled both by The Web and, while he works for the institute, by Jonah. His choices mean nothing in the end and everything he does ends badly. They all go through the Prentiss situation. Tim suffers from Jon's betrayal, and Jon suffers with his paranoia and the constant certainty that he will be killed by his own friends. They all suffer the loss of Sasha, Jon tries to make it right by breaking the table and almost dies. He leaves the man who saved him alone in a room for a moment and the guy dies, he comes back to a corpse. He gets kidnapped multiple times, goes into a coma, comes back into the whole situation that is season 4, where everybody hates him because he's slowly turning into a monster even if it's not a conscious choice (did he ever have one?). The one person who doesn't hate him is avoiding him (Martin). He saves Daisy and even that doesn't make Basira trust him again. He finds a friend in Daisy, someone who literally tried to kill him before, and then Post-Change he has to witness what she's become, and she doesn't even recognize him, only Basira (which makes perfect sense, but I find the scene in which he confesses that made him sad to be heartbreaking). He's also constantly Seeing everyone suffer through an apocalypse he was forced to cause, including the children in Callum's domain.

Then he finds out his whole life he was a puppet, and when he tries to break free of the strings and do what he thinks is right (there was no right answer in the finale, whether you agree with Jon or not, the whole point is that there's no right answer) that's immediately taken away from him and we all know how that ended for him and Martin.

And then, there's people in the fandom who constantly demonize him for his mistakes, while as far as I've seen Tim is a widely beloved character, I'm sure there's Tim haters out there too, you seem to have encountered some from the way you said people blame Tim, I personally never encountered any. So maybe our perspectives on this one will just be opposites because of personal experience, I guess.

Anyway, I genuinely think Jon checks the boxes for both mistreated by the narrative and mistreated by the fandom. And maybe Tim does too! This isn't even Jon propaganda honestly. I'd be fine with either of them moving forward. They both suffer a lot and it's heartbreaking. This Tim propaganda just really rubbed me the wrong way and I wanted to say something. The fact that Jon does carry some responsibility to Tim's pain doesn't exclude Jon's own suffering, so I don't really get your point. And I don't see what you gain by acting like its a moral mistake to vote Jon?

Then again maybe I'm the one who took it too seriously, I don't know.

(sorry for rambling on your post, op)

Round 1: Right Side - Jonathan Sims (The Magnus Archives) vs. Tim Stoker (The Magnus Archives)

[copias-girl]

Hey, you posted the Headcanon challenge and I decided to ask you (about Copia):

His angry/violent headcanon, likes/dislikes headcanon and childhood headcanon (as i quoted in earlier asks about TCAC). And maybe a random headcanon too if you want.

<33

Headcanon list here for anyone who wants to request! ♥︎ I’m adding a cut because this got LONG

☠️ Angry/violent headcanon: Copia only truly gets filled with blinding rage when someone is saying something bad or trying to harm someone who he cares deeply about, whether it be y/n, his rats, or even his ghouls! But he especially gets protective over y/n, and although he’s not an inherently violent person, he will get physical if he has to protect you. Also, Copia us 100% the type of person to cry angry tears. (I’m the same way)

As for when someone is insulting him, he becomes a mix of sadness with just a bit of anger. When people insult him, it nags at his insecurities and he becomes self conscious. He often doesn’t feel worthy of defending himself in the way that he vehemently defends the people he cares about.

☯️ Likes/dislikes headcanon: Copia really dislikes when people make assumptions about him. He doesn’t appreciate people who think they have him all figured out, when in reality they don’t. Sometimes people will think he’s shallow, blissfully unaware, or just a happy-go-lucky guy, but they fail to see deeper inside him. They have no idea how hard he worked to become Papa, the struggles and ridiculing he had to face, and the strength he showed while dealing with it all.

He also dislikes when Sisters of Sin try to date him just because he’s Papa. It hurts when they act so sweet, but he can see right through their facade. They think he’s stupid, but he knows that they only want him because of his powerful position. It makes him feel lonely. No one batted an eye at him when he was Cardinal, and now that he’s Papa he has everyone fawning over him? He often wonders if they still make fun of him behind his back.

However, what he does like is y/n. He absolutely loves that you love him for HIM. You love his grey hair, his wrinkles, his awkwardness, his rats. He’s not the tallest man, but you love his height. You don’t care that he eats too much rigatoni. You think he’s absolutely perfect. You love each and every thing about him, and he can literally see the adoration in your eyes when you look at him. He can feel nothing but pure love emanating off you when you hug him, kiss him, wrap your arms around him and squeeze him tight. And especially when you make love. You love him so fearlessly, with every fibre of your being, and he knows it’s real. He’s almost in disbelief with the way you only have eyes for him. And it really gives him a thrill when you display your affection for him in public. You show everyone just how much your Papa means to you, making him blush red hot under his paint by pulling him into sinfully passionate kisses right in front of everyone.

▼ Childhood headcanon: Copia was a gentle yet lonely child. He was brought up as an orphan, not knowing that Sister Imperator and Nihil are his parents. He excelled in his studies, especially rituals and Latin, but that doesn’t mean he didn’t have fun. He always enjoyed riding his tricycle around the ministry, or befriending various rats that lived in the abbey. He would get scolded for it, but he’d always save some cheese from lunch and sneak off to bring it to them. He always felt like he related to the rats, because they’re very misunderstood little creatures. Little Copia would sometimes play with Terzo and Secondo, but they were years older than him and often did their own thing. Primo was much older than all of the Emeritus brothers and he was kind to him, often requesting Copia’s help in the garden. And of course Sister Imperator was always in Copia’s corner. However, Nihil, not knowing that Copia was actually his son, would often become frustrated with him. Which isn’t really anything new because I headcanon that he would get fed up and angry with his own sons anyway, so none of the children were safe from his scolding. However, with Copia thinking he was an orphan, it hit a little harder.

ൠ Random headcanon: Ok Copia definitely watches old black and white Italian romance and comedy films and also old horror films with his rats! 🐀 Matrimonio All’Italiana is one of my personal favourites so I’m making it one of Copia’s faves too >:3

He puts on his silk pyjamas and reclines in front of the television with some of his ratties! They share some cheddar popcorn while Copia makes comments and explains certain aspects of the plot to his rats <3 Sometimes you can find your sweet man passed out on the sofa with his rats all curled up sleeping on him! And his face lights up with excitement when you tell him you’d love to join the next movie night ♥︎

[leviiattacks]

levi and erwin as dads with their s/o headcanons please? 🥺

author note :: anon later came back in another ask and specified they wanted modern levi and erwin so i’ve done that !! i’m working my way through requests and i may not do them all but reminder as always that requests are open ;-) ALSO WOOOH finally time to write erwin.

levi

he finds it hard to figure out how to be a dad at first because he’s never really had a solid father figure that’s consistently been there. he worries occasionally thinking whether or not he’s doing a good or bad job

but what he knows for certain is that his mother was a great parent and he decides that he’ll be like her because she made him happy when she was around

he enjoys dressing the kids up when they’re super young

like really enjoys it. he loves onesies it’s so odd to you because he just comes back home one day with a snowman onesie, a demon onesie, an angel onesie, ALL THE ONESIES IMAGINABLE???

you have to admit it’s cute

very doting, he’s that dad that’ll pack lunches for his kids without being told to do it by you. he does it because it makes him happy to see the lunch boxes return empty at the end of the day

also loves feedback on his lunches

you’d think he’d be the type to toughen the children up and tell them to not cry over cuts and scrapes but he literally carries around cute band-aids with him in case of injury

does NOT tolerate a messy room.

spring cleaning is a thing and he does not care how much the kids whine they have to participate

teaches them how to use the washing machine, iron, fold their duvets, organise their wardrobes from a young age

still very strict. no sleepovers. he does not trust his children in the hands of anybody.

you scold him for it because ??? the kids need to interact with others ??? but he’s adamant he doesn’t like the idea. no means no.

“if you want a sleepover so bad your friends can come over here. that’s the best you’re getting.”

but you know he says that because he cares. levi would never invite outsiders to the house because of his low tolerance for germs but if he’s willing to do it for his kids then it’s obvious he won’t change his mind on the sleepover rule for their own safety

adding onto this he’s protective, anyone who messes with his kids will have a stern word thrown at their parents

“behaviour like this tends to be learnt in the home so if your kid cusses mine out again i’ll be back and you’ll have to put some money in the swear jar. got it? :-)”

will not put the kids in classes for things like swimming he prefers to teach them himself

“why the hell should i do that when i could spend that time with them? i think my breaststroke is pretty good y’know.”

then he looks at you waiting to agree and when you don’t he grumbles saying you’re just jealous that he can swim better than you

will never get angry at the kids, rarely shouts or argues when around them in general. level headed, sure he gets annoyed because they’re children of course they’ll annoy him at some point but he’ll never take it out on them

as long as they’re happy he doesn’t care about the career they choose

like at all, he’s supportive of anything and everything as long as they become good, genuine people

whatever his children like or show an interest in he’ll buy in bulk - you grimace thinking of the time he showed up with a huge cart of oranges and his literal explanation was “the kids said they like them.”

erwin

he’s so excited to become a parent, he’s been looking forward to it for a long time and he knows he’ll love talking to his kids and teaching them what he’s learnt through his lifetime

but really that’s his advantage, he finds it easy to understand how his children feel and he sympathizes well with them

does not like negative reinforcement or making his children go through punishments, instead when they do something good he positively reinforces them to encourage that they keep up the good behaviour

big on bedtime stories, wants them to have a love for reading.

“y/n what do i read to them tonight? i have so many choices but i can’t even pick?”

sports, arts, music, extracurricular activities in general

will encourage his children to participate in a hobby but they’re free to choose what it is he doesn’t mind what

if they’re really good and have events or recitals you can bet for a fact that erwin will be sitting proudly in the front row cheering them on

“YOU GOT THE BALL YEAHHH KEEP GOING YES YES YES!!!!”

he’s very out of character because he gets so loud but his enthusiasm never fails to encourage the children or to make you smile

if his child ever gets in trouble at school he’s going to defend them

“so this is the school’s reaction to bullying? i think my child stood up for what was right.”

only if it’s clear his child is in the right though!!

takes them fishing he thinks it’s important to spend quality time together and what better way to spend time by conversing for hours on his boat? sharing life stories and giving them advice

he’s really really busy but will try to find as much time as he can with his children. when he does get free days most of his time is spent talking to them and asking how school’s going

he’s not good at showing affection but when they’re asleep he’ll sometimes kiss their foreheads before leaving the room

“hey, look at you being soft.” you’d tease from the doorway

“i’ve always been soft i just don’t know if they’d be embarrassed by me doing it in public...” his confession catches you off guard because you know the kids wouldn’t mind it

“oh god, you’re their dad have some confidence, they’d love it!!”

he’s really self conscious after hearing that children don’t like affection in front of their peers because he doesn’t want to embarrass them

but the night he admitted that to you he realizes that the kids rush to kiss his cheek more often or to give him a hug

he has a suspicion that they heard what he said, it allows him to learn it’s okay to inquire and ask them questions about what they like and dislike more often

he learns more and more along the way and it’s one long journey but he’s a great father in the end. endlessly supportive he takes the title of father incredibly seriously.