#because she's literally never had a good female role model other than her mother and shes surrounded by men who want to kill maim

[daily-linkclick]

daily link click: 9/10/23

relief

[ajappendix]

Amanda Jane interviews Miah Marlow and Miss Moonstar

Miah Marlow introduces her Tumblr blog with a list that immediately reveals her to be multi-talented. “Gender-fluid, Digital Artist, Writer, Musician, Professional Organizer, Philosopher, Activist, Model, Humorist.“ Her partner, in every respect, he calls Miss Moonstar.  It is my pleasant task to interview this special and interesting couple whom many people know from social media. 

Amanda

Our past has much to do with our present so let's begin by delving into the past, before you met. Despite the wondrous childhood images our culture likes to promote, many do not have an enviable start in life to carry forward into adulthood. My first question to both of you is:-

”What circumstances, experiences and events of your early years do you feel greatly influenced the person that you are now?"

Miah

My Mother left when I was 3 years old. Two years later my Father remarried a woman who, with his assistance, tormented and abused my young life for the next 13 years. My early years are marked by insecurity, fear, shame, and pain. We were incredibly sheltered, and I had very little contact with my extended family for many years. One of my deepest memories is that of missing my Grandparents, whom I knew loved me very much. Sometimes, I even dreamt I was at their house, and when I awoke to find it not true, I would cry uncontrollably at the reality until I puked. 

The most influential memory of my life happened the night my Dad drove me to the store at the end of the road. I was 7 years old. He pulled the car over and said "You'll always be special to me, but from now on SHE has to be first. If not she'll leave us. You will call her Mom." It was the day my Dad lost his spine, and I lost my Dad. I hate to start so negatively, but this is the truth. When I was old enough for them to leave me home alone, around 11 or 12, I began to create the earliest incarnations of what would become my gender fluidity. There is no question that being ruled by a strong, evil woman, and a weak spineless man, led me to be confused about where to find role models. So, I went deep into my own mind and made my own special place, and accompanying version of myself, galaxies apart from the me I showed the world. It would be a lifetime before I would reconcile the two. 

Miss Moonstar

Growing up as the youngest and the only girl in a home with all males and no mother or female role model was confusing and difficult but, it was also a lesson in strength and intelligence. I was already "different" than all of the other little girls around, with my dark complexion and my "strange" features. Add in being raised in a home full of only males and no mother, and that was a recipe for the perfect weirdo. I had a great father, who back then, was the wisest and most resilient person. He taught me to find solace and knowledge in the the earth, the water, the sun, the moon, and the nonhuman creatures. And books. So those were my friends, my teachers, and my counsellors for most of my young life. Making human friends as a young person proved to be almost impossible because in a small, conservative, 99.99% white, Christian town where ANY outsider is unwelcome; the mothers of the little girls don't trust a strange darker girl who does not have a "good god fearing mother to tame the savage out of her" (I actually heard things like that growing up), not to mention I literally had B cups at age 9, and that is a heavy accelerant for ignorant, insecure, small town women .....So I think as I matured into a young adult, these things helped mold me into being as disarming as possible because I just wanted women to see me, to like me, to understand that I'm one of them. These things probably played a role in me being insecure with my body image for most of my adult life, as well. The same experiences also taught me to be stoic, to never stop educating myself, to embrace my intelligence, to understand my power, and to never wield them for wicked reasons. To remember that no living creature is more valuable than another. And to recognize the internal beauty in the rare and unique people that the earth puts in my life.

Amanda

Both sad and at the same time beautiful answers. I think it has taken a long time for the social sciences to recognize the significant impact of our childhood years on what we become as adults, especially the first four years of our “formative years” (birth to 8yrs). 

Miah, “At what age did you realize that you were different from those around you, and begin to question where you fitted in the narrow binary gender view of the time.”

Miah

I mentioned that I began dressing feminine in secret around age 11. Up until 16, I was certain I was unique in this behaviour, and I certainly thought I was doing something wrong. I had no idea there were others like me, until finally, one day my mind was opened to a whole different world. Remember, this was 1991. There were no smart phones and being "online" was not quite universal. So, as a 16 year old wanting, no, needing porn, I had to turn to the medium of the time, magazines. Club Magazine to be exact, because it had penetration pics. I only had one copy stashed away in a secret spot, and since many of its pages were stuck together, I often found myself gooning to the back pages, where the 1-900 numbers were advertised, along with ads for other interesting publications and VHS tapes. This is where I saw what my immature mind could only describe as a chick...with a dick! She was tall, and skinny, with tiny, if there-at-all boobs, long brown hair, and a boyish yet beautiful face, advertising something called “Shemale BDSM”. I immediately fell into the fantasy of wondering about her, imagining how she came to be, and ultimately, being her. From that day forward, I never stopped imagining myself as a feminine thing, destined to someday flourish as I wanted. This was the moment I realized that boys could be girls, and maybe I was one of them. 

Amanda

Miss Moonstar, a slightly different question to you. “Growing up in a male environment and shunned as 'different' by the mothers of girls with whom you could have been friends, did you ever question your gender or did you always firmly feel that you were female?”

Miss Moonstar

For a long time, I didn't understand that the reason that I was "different" was because of my ethnicity and my over developed young body. I thought that it was because I was some form of weird boy. It's a strange explanation but, I was in a home with only boys, I did all the same things that boys did, I played with boys, I wore my brothers' "hand me down" boys clothes, I liked the same things as boys liked so therefore, I must be a boy. The day that I truly started to understand that I might not be exactly the same as my brothers and father was when, my dad walked by the bathroom and I was in there going pee, with the door open; my dad asked me what I was doing and I told him I was peeing. He asked me why I was standing up, over the toilet. I just always assumed that was how you went pee. That was how my brothers and my father did it, so why wouldn't I? My dad took me for a long walk that day, explaining to me the physical biological differences between boys and girls, as well as many other things. After that day, I kind of started to rediscover my body, feeling and knowing that I had something different than all of the boys and in my mind, that made me special. I was still very young and had much more to learn and understand about my sex and gender but, the pivotal events of that day subsequently began my journey to embrace my "femaleness" and my femininity. I still have many "masculine" personality traits but, I know that I was absolutely meant to be a woman and, even though womanhood can have it's negative and sometimes scary moments, I would not trade it for  anything. 

Amanda

A question for you both. “What kind of life were you leading just before you met? How did you meet? What attracted you to the other? Was the start of your relationship one of slow growth or was it quite sudden?”

Miah

I was beginning a new life when I met Miss Moonstar. Two years prior, I got divorced. I had lived with my then wife and her two children for 6 years. When I look back on it, I think it was my last ditch attempt at having a "normal" life and shutting out the girl inside who had caused me so much trouble. I struggled with the sexless relationship, but found personal growth in the raising of two boys. I never wanted kids of my own, but I got to teach them decency, and logic, and compassion, and I got to coach baseball. Sadly, I secretly found my feminine time through it all, until I could go no further. When I lost a job, she kicked me out. We tried to remain friends for the sake of the kids, and I finally told her my secret.

I had been doing some serious soul searching the past year since being kicked out. I was getting tired of hiding and lying, so I made the decision to come out in my city. My relationships were suffering, especially the one I had with my Grandpa, as he never could never quite understand me, because I was never honest. I had to set myself free. So, I told him, and my boss, and my few friends, and my ex step kids, and began my transition from secret crossdresser to gender-fluid girl. It was a whirlwind of a time, all culminating in an epic night out at a local bar, where I would make my hometown debut. I had some new friends who would accompany me, and one of them was a young lady who you have come to know as Miss Moonstar.

I could write for a year straight and still not address the scope of Miss Moonstar's arrival in my life. I was literally done with relationships. I planned to be a bachelor forever, taking lovers and being a sex Goddess until I died, when my friend Dawn introduced us. What I remember from that moment is often a blur, but I do remember a very specific feeling that overtook my body as she and I spoke. Nostalgia. Even though we had never met before, I knew this person. She was one of my kind. In fact, the last time I felt this way upon meeting a woman was my college days when girls and guys weren't all that different, just young humans with big dreams. One of us would say something and our eyes would meet and we would laugh in our minds together. On day one! My attraction was instant. My knowledge of her felt reliable and certain. Yes, she was beautiful,  yes, she was sexy,  yes, she was charming, but it was her softness  and intelligence that ultimately won my heart, as no one had ever used such a gentle hand with me, or a thoughtful approach, ever. Still, to this day, her soft love and understanding is unrivalled in my life, and one of the main reasons I'll try to keep her around forever.

I think we were dying to jump into an intensely heated affair, however, do to my gender fluidity and her metered approach, we took our time and tried to go slow. Soon enough, however, we were inseparable and have been ever since.

Miss Moonstar

About 2 years prior to meeting Miah=Jer, I had suffered a miscarriage at around 21 weeks. I cannot accurately articulate the feeling of that loss. To lose someone that I had loved so much but, that I would never be able to meet, was one of the most profound tragedies of my existence. While I was unconscious, the nurses contacted my romantic long term partner/father of my child, as standard procedure but also, so that I would not be alone when I came out of the anesthesia. When I awoke, the nurses gently informed me that my partner would not be coming. Since I could no longer be a vessel for his child, I was no longer a viable partner. I was a failure in every definition of the word. I spent the next almost 2 years grieving, searching for answers in every pocket of the world, and rebuilding myself. I had come to the conclusion that I deserved to love myself and that the only people who deserved to be in my life, were the people who encouraged and supported me loving myself. I also had decided that I was not going to have relationship partners ever again. Male and female lovers but, no relationships. Before I would embark on being the world's greatest womanizer and seductress though, I was introduced to Miah=Jer, through my friend Dawn. This person was physically the most beautiful human that I had ever seen, on both ends of the masculine/feminine spectrum and everything in between. However, when I sat down and started to talk to this person, I felt like I was finally home. I had always wondered what the feeling of "coming home" was. I never felt like I had ever been "home". Not with my family, not in the place that I grew up, not in any state or city that I had lived in, not around any humans. But this person, this strange feeling that was both foreign and more familiar than anything I had ever felt, this was exactly where I was supposed to be. We started our conversation that night and for the next almost four years, haven't stopped. The attraction was cerebral for me. Of course he has endless physically attractive traits but, I love Miah's intellect the most. I love that Miah is much more intelligent than me, I love that there is no topic that is off limits, I love his constant quest for knowledge, her never ending thirst for learning. And his patient, gentle approach to all of my crazy idiosyncrasies. I also have a dark, twisted, sick sense of humour and Miah is the only person that I've ever met that can go toe-to-toe with me on that. Because we both were in a place in our lives where we refused to keep hiding our true selves and, couldn't continue to pretend that we weren't total freak shows, we both needed to build a safe space for each other, so as much as the feeling of "home" was sudden, we slowly nurtured and grew our relationship. As ridiculous and cliche as it may sound, Miah=Jer is my soul's recognition of it's counterpart. Miah=Jer is the love of my life and I will love him for as long as she allows me to, but I will start with forever. 

Amanda

What wonderful answers both of you have given. So powerful, so touching. What an irony that two people, both sworn to lead single lives, should meet and almost immediately know they had just met their soulmate. It is a rare and special story, well worth telling. So many yearn to meet the “right” partner and have not. Let’s hope such readers will be encouraged by your stories.

Now that we are up to the present, it is time for a standard question for you both. “What age are you now, where do you live and what do you do to make a living.”

Miah

I'm from Ithaca, NY, I'm 46, and I have a unique arrangement from which I obtain resources. I've been demonized by some family members for this lifestyle, but I wanted to be honest with you all. Coming out as genderfluid hurt my career path a bit. If you think poorly of me after reading this, well, fuck off.

I care for and work for my Grandpa. I manage his life and his business. He's 89, and he requires assistance in almost every area of his life. Some of that is personal care and daily needs like food, various appointments, his finances, and his medical needs. But, it also entails acting as property manager for his apartment building, and rental agent when an apartment becomes available or a tenant has needs. I also maintain the property physically and do the building maintenance. I do this because I'd be dead without my Grandpa, and he was abandoned by his immediate family when his wife, my Grandma, died. He saved me numerous times in this life, and it is only right I repay his love with love in return. Both Miss Moonstar and I have promised him that we will be here until the very end so that is what we will do. This work I do amounts to anywhere from a demanding part time job to a full time job depending on the week, but we have our own house on the same property, food and necessities, and some of the rent I generate becomes mine. I supplement this by working for another elderly person in town in a similar assistant capacity. This is how I get by. I definitely did not expect to be doing this at 46, but loyalty has its price, and its rewards. It's no secret Miss Moonstar and I will inherit this place when the saddest day of my life comes, and it will help us take care of each other moving forward. I hope some of you will still be here for me then. I probably won't know what to do with my grief.

My career is not over though. Many people do not create their legacy until the second half of their life. I fully intend to pursue my dreams as long as I'm alive. I'll probably find my way back to a non profit agency where I can use my law degree for some good, and I definitely plan to add 'published author" to the list of things I've done. Heck, I could still get a record deal. Crazier shit has happened. 

Miss Moonstar

I'm 39 years old. I now live in Ithaca, New York. For a good chunk of years I was a pastry chef, before and after I graduated culinary school. I earned my associate degree in social sciences with the intention of pursuing my B.Soc.Sc in sociology but, the culinary dream had already sunk its teeth in me. After graduating culinary school in New Orleans, I stayed there and continued my career as a pastry chef. I spent some time doing that in various other cities and states until I was diagnosed with rheumatoid arthritis. At that juncture, I knew that I needed to make some serious life changes so, I did. I attained my B.Soc.Sc in sociology, and entered the world of social work. I finally found where I belonged when, a nonprofit that I connected with on a deeply personal level contacted me, offering me a position as a victim advocate for survivors of sexual assault and domestic violence. It has been one of the most humbling, heart wrenching, and necessary experiences that I have ever had.  

Amanda

What a talented and qualified couple you are. I cannot see why, Miah, anyone should think less of you. To put your own life on hold to assist your Grandfather shows that you are a person with moral and ethical values. Yes, there are advantages for you too, but for my own part, I applaud you for what you are doing. Miss Moonstar, from indirect experience I know something of the emotional strength and determination that it takes to be a counsellor to people experiencing heart wrenching situations. I know too how difficult it can be to find a balance of compassion and professional distance that does not burn you out of this invaluable but difficult counselling practice. I also know that arthritis is no fun at all and that you often have to deal with pain. You both deserve medals.

Miah, I know you have written about this several times on your blog, but for this interview “Please clarify what “gender-fluid” means to you and why you feel that the various terms crossdresser, trans, sissy etc do not correctly describe who you are?”

Miah

As the years have passed, my definition of my gender has changed yet I still use the same word, gender-fluid. I suppose this is simply because it's the most accessible word available, even though many people still don't know what it is. I'm gender-fluid in the literal sense, meaning my gender is fluid. While many people find themselves leaning feminine or masculine or in between, I am all over the spectrum depending on my mood or desire. Often times, this manifests as either the "girl" or "guy" me, which is sickeningly binary to me, but it is what it is. At least I can move on the spectrum as I wish. I think of gender as different from biological sex or sexuality. I still view myself as male, and my sexuality really has no bearing on my gender, or vice versa. 

The other words you mentioned either aren't strong enough to define me, or undermine me entirely. For example, the word crossdresser is a weak action descriptor. It merely says that one crossdresses, similar to how biker indicates one rides bikes. The word sissy adds a sexual element that is not always present in my regular behaviour, and also indicates that I might be submissive, embarrassed by what I am, or negatively influenced by the internet. None of these are true. Finally, transgender can never be the word for me because I do not claim womanhood. I think that is the essence of being trans, that one is the alternate sex from their birth body. I am simply not a woman, and one hundred percent biologically male. I claim femininity as a skillset and part of my gender, hence my reliance on the term gender-fluid. 

Amanda

Personally, I appreciate the nuance of the term gender-fluid as you describe it. The words gender and sexuality are not synonyms. I generally refer to myself as a cross dresser but I agree that all that term really implies is that I cross dress. 

Miss Moonstar, many women would balk at living with and loving a partner who presents as a male one day and as a female the next. “Can you describe how you feel about this and, by doing so, help other women to appreciate the possibility of doing likewise?”

Miss Moonstar

 First and foremost, I love Miah=Jer's gender fluidity and all of the different characteristics that it entails. Regardless of what end of the gender spectrum she presents as, he has the same heart, the same mind, the same emotions, the same voice, the same body, everyday. This was never something that I "needed to wrap my head around" or do any deep soul searching about when I Miah=Jer. Yes, I first met him when she was en femme but, the very next day we met for coffee and she was en masc. The familiar cerebral conversation, the relaxed nature, and the attraction did not change with the gender accoutrements.

Being with a man who knows that he is a man who, also knows that he has many genders is the most liberating and refreshing feeling that I have ever experienced. I've always been a pansexual woman, constantly seeking out something that everyone I knew told me did not exist. But it did exist, it DOES exist. Having a male partner who not only loves femininity and all of the different tangible and intangible layers but, who understands it, enjoys it, and LIVES it, is something that I will never take for granted.

I know that some people want me to say that during the beginning of our relationship, I was worried about; whether Miah would be "masculine" and "manly" enough for me, what people would think of me when they saw us together in public, if my friends/colleagues/family would approve of our relationship, how our sex would work, what do I say to people who question me about Jer and/or our relationship. The truth is this, in the same order that I listed the "thoughts": I did not consider her manliness or masculinity. His gender is fluid, her masculinity is always there, just as his femininity is. As far as his manliness goes, he is a man, he identifies as a man and when he needs or wants that manliness to be at the forefront, it is and, I don't get to decide either of those. No one has the right to decide his gender except Miah=Jer. I fell in love with her BECAUSE of her gender fluidity, NOT IN SPITE of her gender fluidity. I have never cared what people think when they see us together in public. If someone that I care about doesn't approve of our relationship, that's their problem, not mine. If you can't be seen in public with us, then you don't need to be seen by me, at all. I don't have time for that shit. If someone genuinely inquires about Jer or our relationship then of course, I explain what gender-fluid means, who Jer truly is inside, who I am, the beautiful love that we have, and why I'm the luckiest person in the world. And as far as our sex, I think everyone wonders what the sex will be like when they first enter in a relationship, regardless of the dynamic. I wasn't worried about Jer not desiring me, not because I'm arrogant, it was just pretty obvious that he desired me and my body as much as I desired him and his body. I don't need to go too in depth but, for the first time in my life, I feel sexually liberated with Jer. There is no judgment, no pressure, no weird expectations. We agreed from the beginning that sex is meant to be a joyful experience and, we encourage each other to free ourselves of our sexual insecurities. And he's a real hellcat in the sack 😉.

In light of all this that I said, the key to success to my relationship with Miah=Jer has been honesty from the very beginning. Honest with each other about who we are and what we want and, honest with our own selves. To the women who are considering entering into a relationship with a gender nonconforming male, I can try to offer some gentle advice; don't judge the person's sexuality based on their gender, they are two different things. Don't secretly try to devise some kind of plan to convince the person to mollify or allay their femininity. That's just shitty. Think about it, you would be asking a person to tear out a piece of the fabric of who they are. If I asked Miah=Jer to diminish his femininity, it would be the same as him asking me to whitewash the half of me that is indigenous. You can't simply "accept" that part of them as if it is some negative trait that you can "deal with" but, as long as they keep it to themselves. You embrace and you love the whole person or you stop wasting both of your time and you move on. It may sound harsh but, it's just the way it has to be. That person is sharing a part of themselves with you that they have had to hide and feel societal shame about for longer than you can begin to fathom. Just like you, they want to be loved completely, they want to be seen, and they want to shed the layers of secrets and stigmatization and degradation that our society has forced them into. Gender is such an innocent thing and yet, the world has bulldozed and browbeaten male humans into feeling that embracing their feminine gender is an errant and nefarious act. So, the last thing they need is you giving them a false sense of security by allowing them to finally open up to you, telling them you welcome them and approve of them and then, turning around and invalidating and undermining their existence.

Just be real with them, be real with yourself. Fuck society's bullshit narratives and judgments. If you think you will lose family and friends simply because you're in love with a gender nonconforming person, then you don't really have those family and friends to begin with. Anyone who abandons a person, who they purport to love unconditionally, entirely based on that person's partner's gender, doesn't actually unconditionally love that person.

What Miah and I have is something beautiful and special and I really am the luckiest girl in the world, however cliche that truth may sound. It is not something that other people could easily attain or maintain and I understand that. But, it is possible for anyone who really wants it and who is willing to nourish and cherish and grow it. 

Amanda

Miss Moonstar, I really do hope that those who read your answer will take your statements and advice to heart. No, loving only part of a person is not unconditional, nor is it truly sustainable.

Your blog describes you both walking, shopping and visiting places together (you have addressed the matter of public reaction in your blog at times). So, “Would you both tell us about your negative and positive experiences of typical public reaction to you as a couple, and how you felt about it both at the time and in general?”

Miah

The public reaction to us as a couple is entirely different from the public reaction to me when I appear alone. MM is a bulletproof vest for me. When we are together, we are rarely bothered by anyone. We have had a couple belligerent people try to invade our space, and gotten some strange looks from a passerby, but generally speaking, I don't think people dare approach us. Sometimes, I wish more people would come up and talk to us. I miss people. The protection, which MM exudes but doesn't purposefully project, can sometimes insulate me from the world. I am certain my presence does the same to her. However, I stray from the point. I think most of the public likes to see us, at least in our liberal city. Occasionally, someone is a little too excited to see us. For example, the other day a guy parked his truck backwards in a turnabout so he could watch us take pics at a park bench. He just brazenly gawked at us until we moved spots. When I drove by him, he smiled and waved to us. At this point, it is what it is. We may never be the couple who can come and go unnoticed, but for the most part, we both enjoy the thrill and we do our best to laugh at ourselves and remember we do what we do for joy. Haters are always gonna hate but you gotta get to the point where you don't register that. I think we are almost there. 

Miss Moonstar

For the most part, the public reaction seems to be positive, or at the very least, NOT negative. There have been a couple of times that I had to get gulley and let some redneck, hillbilly, TERF bitches know that I would bring the ruckus. They thought they were going to prevent Miah from using the bathroom. Miah is always so dignified and pleasant and shy so, she was trying to walk away and avoid making a scene. Normally, I would be the same way but, I completely lose my shit when someone fucks with Miah, especially women like that. They think she won't defend herself because she is a gender-fluid man and they are "women". So, I get a little crazy, say something totally inappropriate, threaten to bang their husbands, and they end up backing off......Other than those assholes, the public treats us pretty well. Men can get a little intense in their appreciation for us but, we take it in stride. Most women love us too. Miah has a commanding presence and most people respect her, even if they aren't sure of the dynamic. I think most times, people see her and then see me and wonder why she isn't with someone equally as amazing and beautiful as her. I wonder that too. Regardless, I feel lucky as hell to have her and to be treated so kindly by most strangers. 

Amanda

It is so interesting to hear that you are treated differently as individuals than when people see you as a couple. It surprises me that you have not had many unpleasant experiences. That says a lot for the progress of acceptance of those who are gender non conforming. 

This is a cheeky question you can answer together, but from your blog you sound like a fairly sexually active couple when so many couples seem to complain about their partner and not having enough sex. It is not easy to define 'sex' or quantify it, so for this question consider it to include any sexual activity engaged in as a couple. I can give you a choice of two typical questionnaire questions. "Together rate your level of activity on a scale of 1 to 5, 1 being inactive and 5 being very active." Or, to be more empirical, "How many times a month do you engage in sexual activity together?" 

Miah and Miss Moonstar

I'd say we have sex anywhere from 4 to 9 times a month. As with any couple, life will steal days from us occasionally. Someone may not feel well, we may be too busy, or and unforeseen event will stop us from coming together, but we never have an issue reinvigorating each other. The sexual space we have created is one of absolute non-judgmental joy seeking. It is one of the most free spaces we have ever entered. We are open about what turns us on, we have no insecurities about any aspects of our bodies or our sexual skills. We exhibit whatever feelings we may feel across the gender spectrum without fear. You can imagine that makes for a really fun experience where we can let go and just enjoy. We understand that sexuality is not static, so we try our best to facilitate each other's dreams and fantasies and it has been more than wonderful. We don't believe couples who say they screw every day. It's not about quantity, it's about quality and ultimately, having fun. 

Miah. I’ll add that a day never goes by where Miss Moonstar doesn't grab my ass and tell me how sexy I am, even though she's the real Goddess. I'm a very lucky guy.  

Amanda

In the light of what I hear on social media, I think you are both very fortunate to have each other as sexual partners.

Another question. ”With separate answers, how do you feel and how do you react when your partner is the object of coarse or crude comments and offers of sex online or in real time?” 

Miah

I get more of this online, while Miss gets more real life propositions. I think we handle this quite well, considering the crude way in which people show their love. It is, however, occasionally a mine field to navigate. I've made a point of making it grossly clear that I am taken, and in love, and not missing any lustiness in my life. I am also wildly flirtatious so I try not to lead people on. Over time, I've developed a kind of rule I follow when dealing with sex fuelled online friends. It's a one chance rule. I always forgive the first crudely worded or dick pic included message. I thank the person for their interest in me. I understand that people find me attractive and sometimes can't help themselves. I believe in the decency in people. So, I implore them to reconsider approaching me a different way, so we may be able to be friends. Often times, even someone who began with a dick pic will turn back into the good person inside once they realize I am much more than a sex object. Besides, being my decent friend online is the best and only way to get my reciprocal flirtation and the occasional salacious ass shot in your inbox. 

As for Miss, and the guys who come on to her: I do nothing. She's beautiful and sexy and I fully expect people to approach her. I also trust her to handle it, which she always does. I never feel insecure or mad that she gets love, or attention. I'm flattered, actually. Everyone needs attention and I'm glad she gets it. If anyone really crossed the line, I'd kick their ass. I'm still a 6 foot tall man. Come get some. 

Miss Moonstar

This is an awesome question and I probably should be ashamed of my answer, but I'm not. I could lie and pretend to be dignified but, I won't. The truth is, I love it when Miah is the object of people's sexual fantasies or desires. How could I not love it? I have my own dark twisted fantasies in which Miah is the main attraction. The difference is, I get to act out my fantasies with Miah, as others do not. Well, except for the occasional weekend when I need to make some extra money so, I turn her into a Red Roof Inn glory hole queen.......I'm joking, I do not pimp out the love of my life......I love that Jer has many admirers and fans. The only time that I am bothered is when he is bothered by it. If he truly feels uncomfortable or disrespected, then I try to comfort him and give him advice on how to proceed.......Miah gets a great deal of online (as well as some in real life, that seek her out online) admirers and mostly, we just laugh at the ridiculous things that people say because it is highly entertaining. 

Amanda

I think the strength of a relationship is shown by enjoying the fact that one’s partner receives attention. It shows trust and confidence. But, yes, if that line is crossed……Watch out!  Some of the things that anonymous admirers suggest they would do to us would test the skills of an acrobat, but they are certainly amusing. 

Before we move off the subject of Sex, I note that you have been asked before about your interest in the Chastity fetish. “Being largely ignorant about what motivates people to wear cages and be submissive to another person, would both of you like to comment on this subject for me?”

Miah

Since I have written extensively about chastity, I'll keep it brief. A chastity cage is a sexy novelty item to me. It's jewelry for my dick. It's a naughty game we play occasionally but it's not what you think. I'm not submissive unless I decide to be for a period of time. I don't hate my cock, nor has it become useless because of occasionally being caged. But, we are an open minded couple and the cage necessarily changes the sexual dynamic when it's being used. When it's on, I utilize a more feminine based sexuality and we enjoy that space until it comes off. Mostly though, I like to wear it us an accoutrement that helps minimize my bulge with certain clothing and makes me feel dreamily sexual all day long. So, yes, we enjoy chastity but I'm not a cuckold or a subbie, nor is Miss Moonstar a true Dominant. We are just an adventurous couple with a wonderfully safe sexual space. 

Miss Moonstar

My interest in putting Miah's dick in a cage and exerting dominance over him can pretty much be summed up with one word, followed by an overstatement of facts. That word is REPARATIONS.....Miah=Jer is white and I'm indigenous (biracial). Ya'll motherfuckers caged my people onto reservations and stole my land, so now, I get to steal your anal cavities and cage your dicks. Lock up your husbands and grandfathers ladies, I'm coming to cage their dicks and blow out their holes!!!.....too soon?.....too far?.... You're welcome.

Amanda

I somehow didn’t think you two were into dominance and submissiveness in any serious way. I get it now. Using a cage as another part of a repertoire of sexual experiences together makes absolute sense. Miss Moonstar, you have a wicked sense of humour, though with a tinge of understandable strong feeling. I envisage a myriad of white guys clutching their privates, tightening their anal sphincters and hoping not to be found in their hiding places. Retribution indeed.

Of all your talents, Miah, music stands out as appearing to be the most important, so let’s address that topic. My question to you is “What motivates you to express yourself in music and how long have you been composing? Is there a connection between your music and your sexuality?”

Miah

Music is my God, and my drug addiction. Seriously, music has helped me through the parts of life another person cannot. Music has soothed me, inspired me, healed me, and guided me all my life. I can't explain my connection to it other than to say it's otherworldly. When I was 18, my first roommate in college had an old acoustic and taught me the chords necessary to play “Wish You Were Here” by Pink Floyd. I've never been able to afford lessons so I just downloaded and printed tablature of my favourite songs until I learned to strum and properly form chords. I remember having the tablature for the entire OK Computer album and learning all those songs and the weird chords Johnny Greenwood used in that album. Eventually, I realized I also needed to learn to sing. In the same manner, I just hacked away until I figured out how to use my voice. It's taken years. I probably wrote my first songs in 1998. I played in a band in college where we played the songs I wrote, rudimentary as they were. Then, life happened and I stopped playing music for a decade at least. When I met Danie, all my passion for life returned and so did all my demons and fears, and those are what I write about. The trials and tribulations of an emotionally dense life. Mood music for the soul, if you will. 

You asked if my music was connected to my sexuality. Of course it is. Everything I do comes from my dicks' brain, in pursuance of the honey hole. I'm a man, after all. 

Amanda

Miah, that you taught yourself is really interesting. What an achievement. Yes, as a guy having two brains, it is always a struggle to know which one is motivating and making decisions on one’s behalf. 

Miss Moonstar, my question to you is “I am sure you are supportive of Miah’s musical talent, so would you like to comment on this area of life with Miah?”

Miss Moonstar

Yes, I love Miah's music, I really truly do....music is pretty much the sole reason that I did not become a homicidal maniac many many years ago. Without music to be my therapist every single day, I think they might have opened Alcatraz back up to incarcerate me for the heinous atrocities that I would have committed. I have known many different types of musicians throughout my life and many of them were either, just trying to make as much noise as possible without making much sense or, they were too interested in "acting" like a musician but never actually BEING a musician. I still always tried to find something true and positive about their art to encourage them. I love all kinds of music from Jackson Browne to Tupac to Nirvana to Buddy Guy to Stevie Nicks to Alicia Keys to Ani DiFranco and everything in between and outside of those artists, including and especially Greygh0st (Miah=Jer). I am completely tone deaf and I'm partially deaf in my left ear but, I fucking know great music when I hear it. That is me exhibiting my arrogant and narcissistic side and, I apologize for that. I've done that quite often in these questions and for that, I'm truly sorry. I can't sing or play an instrument or keep a beat but, I know when something is special, musically. My body hears it before my ears do....I don't love Miah's music simply because I love Miah. I have loved people before and could not love their music because, well, they sounded like Gary Busey hate fucking Rudy Giuliani while they both had third degree explosive diarrhea (you're welcome for that imagery, by the way). I love Miah's music because it soothes me, inspires me, humbles me, etc., because it makes me feel all of the emotions that music should evoke. Every song evokes a different emotion. And, like emotions, some of Miah's songs are easier to handle than others but, they are all valid and beautiful and important. I was so relieved when I knew that he wrote and made great music. I was also relieved when I realized that he wasn't interested in pretending to "act" like a rock star. He is interested in making music. He just truly loves his art. I love and am honoured to be able to witness and be part of his creative process. Creative processes can be difficult at times for various reasons. When Miah writes these songs, the lyrics are many times, from his own experiences, and from my own personal experiences. He has had to go to these emotional places that he has not visited in a long time, or he has to kind of "temporarily tour" my mind and memories. Those things can be a shock to the system. But, they are also worthy of being inspirational. They happened, we went through those battles, and as I have reminded him many times, we found our way back, and when we did, we found each other so, it's ok to leave it all out on the paper. As in, turning those hard experiences into beautiful songs, is the best kind of redemption and reclamation and the greatest way to honour the people we were and the people we became...I've never asked him to write a song about me, or him, or us. When he comes to me and says that he has an idea for a song, I've encouraged him to write it, regardless of the concept. I have always just kind of said, "trust your instincts babe, trust your own creative and emotional intelligence, you're the musician"....

I guess I'm just trying to say that Miah is one of the best lyricists that I've ever heard and her songs are from all different perspectives and different genres, so you would have to be quite an ignorant, dark hearted, fuck-show to not be able to enjoy at least ONE of them. On top of her profoundly keen and penetrating, intuitive lyrics, comes that magical melodic voice that has calmed the raging, thunderous storm inside of me that has the propensity to leave me lost at sea. A voice that has  galvanized me into taking my own power back. A voice that has brought me to my knees, with the realization that someone finally saw me, and still wanted to love me. A voice that is in my head as much as my own voice at times. A voice that is the perfect combination of sweet and savoury and tart. A voice that is impossible not to love. So yeah, I'm her biggest fan. He calls me his muse, but I just feel lucky that I get a front row seat to this magnanimous, multi faceted, beautiful soul.....plus I get to bang the singer, backstage after the show.

Amanda

Well, Miah, I knew music was important to you, but I see now just how much so. Miss Moonstar, what a powerful answer. I suspect that all amateur musicians would just love to have the support and motivation that you give to Miah. 

Interviews do get lengthy and I would love to go on exploring further, but it is time to draw this to a close. My last question is not likely to be an easy one to answer, the topic requiring you to look ahead, act as a futurist and predict the possible outcomes of vitally important but contentious issues in our society. I word the question a little differently for each of you. 

Miah, the attitudes and social mores of our culture seem to be gradually changing towards greater acceptance of the LGBTQ community, but much reluctance and hostility remains among the more conservative elements of our society. Both clerical and political elements are themselves conflicting on the matter, yet both camps exert much influence on the unfolding processes of acceptance and rejection. My question is "Given the sharp division between those whose thinking is "left" or "right", the assault on democracy and the preoccupation with more urgent issues such as climate change, mass migrations, and the threat of further pandemics and nuclear hostilities, what do you see for the near future of the slow trend for acceptance of the LBGTQ community and how do you feel it may affect you personally"?

Miah

I think it's important to look at the bigger picture but, when one looks from too far away, the problem can seem unsolvable and immense. The truth is, the world will never be a safe or fair place for any one type of person. Those are social ideals. The question we must ask is: are there enough quality spaces for us? Is the number of those spaces growing, and are the spaces themselves expanding? I think the current moment in time is one of growth, not suppression, as indicated by the many changing opinions about gender and race that have been seen in the past couple decades. That said, times of growth are always times of danger for the growing. We have to be strong and vigilant, while simultaneously rising above the fray. You want change? You have to be a part of it, even if it will only affect the future world. And, anyone can be a part of it by simply joining the discourse. My only prediction is that we will continue to struggle for a while, until the bullies are exposed as our biggest fans, or better, the very things they fear. Even the binary minded live in a spectrumized world, they just don't know it yet. (Yeah, I just made up a word.) 

On a smaller scale, I'd say the current definitions of sex, gender and sexuality have been muddled into a variety of all encompassing words meant to be identification markers but effectively amount to political and social positions. This is helping to create the divisive arguments ensnaring non binary movements around the world. We have given up trying to explain ourselves, and we defend that with a sense of entitlement that is, sadly, defining this recent generation of freedom fighters. One of the worst things a knowledgeable person can do to an ignorant one is to hide the truth. In order to be understood, one must first admit core truths, and in this world of counter spin, that is increasingly becoming harder. Every story now conveniently has another side. I think this is the main problem with social constructs like gender and race. We've given them such meaning, they now mean too much. To some they mean everything. I think it's time to dial that back and stop attaching such importance to the individual self. If I've learned one lesson in life it is that selfishness is the fastest path to ending up alone. My advice: learn to share. Your world will immediately be a better place. And, if you can't or won't explain yourself,  don't expect to be understood. 

As for me personally, I just keep getting up and living the new day. I don't give a shit what people think about me much anymore because there is just not enough time in the day. All I really have to do is live life until it's gone, and treat others right while I'm here. Just like the world issues you mentioned, I have always been a polarizing character and this has always surprised me. I know myself to be good, loyal, honest and just. I've never quite understood my detractors other than to chalk them up to what could be described as a intrinsic jealousy of my free swinging gender and sexuality, or anger at my inability to label myself as trans or gay or some other binary. Otherwise, I'm not sure how a person could hate my gentle soul. After all, like Bryan Adams said, "Everything I do, I do it for you." Including my music, so if you love me, please follow my YouTube and listen!!! 

PS Thank you all for taking the time and thank you Amanda, for the opportunity to share and for all the hard work you did preparing and executing this project. You are truly a shining light in this Tumblr world and I love you, girl.

Amanda

Miss Moonstar, you strike me as a woman who has strong opinions on many issues, and is prepared to be vocal about them. My question to you is similar to that which I have asked Miah but of a different focus. The question is "Given the ......what do you, as a female and a member of an ethnic minority, see for the near future of the "human rights movement", particularly those relating to ethnic and gender equality in our still male dominated society, and how do you feel it may affect you personally?"

Miss Moonstar

I think that the last four years shattered what little integrity the United States had left, in regards to the human rights movement. I am not blaming one person. I am blaming an ideal that brought people out of the woodwork to defend it. I think that it is going to take some time for us to bounce back from that. And ultimately, while there are more people now than ever who support equality and are fighting everyday for it, America never has been an equitable place for minorities of any race, gender, sexuality or otherwise. I don’t know when or why we tried to convince ourselves that this country was a haven of sanctuary. This is not a home for the free and this land was stolen from the brave so, I think that if we just admit these things to ourselves, we can begin to move forward. 

Pretending that this country treats everyone equally is a mistake, and the federal government is the biggest gaslighter of that flame. The first thing that needs to happen is; all of us people who are fighting for equality and rights need to stick together. We need to stop dividing ourselves. I can guarantee that the same people who think that there is no such thing as systemic racism or police brutality against Black people are the same people who think that everyone has a right to use American Indians as they see fit, that they are owned by everyone. Using “Indianness” for nationalist pride, for advertising strategies, as a Halloween costume, a sports team, for spirituality and self help advancement, etc. But when the Indigenous people try to explain how hurtful and dehumanizing it is to have their entire ethnicity mocked, these entitled people say that Indians are being too sensitive. They are good enough to be used in every possible way but not valid enough to have sovereignty or equality, or dignity.

And THOSE particular people who think that about Black people and Indigenous people definitely do not have any regard for the gender movement. They do not have any regard for anything that is not straight, white, and christian. So, instead of the LGBTQIA+ people on one side, the Black people on another side, the Indigenous people on another, the women’s rights movement on another side, other POC over on another side, instead of that menagerie of messiness and embarrassment, how about ALL of us on the SAME side? We need to stop shitting on each other, we need to stop acting like it is acceptable to hold someone else down in order to prop ourselves up. I see a lot of gender nonconforming white people who turn a blind, deafening silent eye in regards to POC. I hear people deny the truths of systemic racism and police brutality against Black/Brown people and, in the same breath, talk about how hard it is for Indiegnous people on reservations. Admitting how much Native Americans have been fucked over is cool but, admitting that Black people have been fucked over is a hard limit? Give me a goddamn break with that bullshit.

We all need to create a safe space for each other, we need to stop pretending that fighting each other is going to change ANYTHING. Fighting the establishment that wants us to fight each other is what we should be doing. Holding the guilty accountable, not staying silent. Too many people “don’t want to get involved”, because they think that staying “neutral” is peaceful and proactive. I have news for those people, 1.) you are already involved 2.) neutrality is no longer an option, not in these regards 3.) if you can stand by and watch a Black person be mistreated by the police, or see the huge number of Indigenous women who are missing or murdered, or watch women lose reproductive rights, or watch LGBTQIA+ people fall through the cracks and lose their entire livelihood in order to gain a fraction of efficacy...if you can stand by and see all that shit (and more) happen, and then look me in the eyes and tell me that you support all of those people but, you have to remain neutral; then you are NOT neutral. You made a choice, you are just too much of a coward to admit your choice. You are the establishment that we are fighting against and we do not want your superficial, complacent bullshit. 

If these things that I have said bother anyone on a deeply personal level, then I strongly urge them to look inward to find out why. I am not a hateful person, I only stand for equality and peace. Sometimes, you have to fight for peace and I prefer fighting with my mind instead of my fists. I have never once used physical violence in my life, but I have seriously considered throwing a bag of shit on Marjorie Taylor Greene’s hideous face. I am at a loss as to how to do that, though. How do I put Marjorie Taylor Greene into a bag and then take that bag of Marjorie Taylor Greene and throw it on Marjorie Taylor Greene? Talk about a fucking paradox.

PS Thank you to those of you who have supported Miah throughout the years. It brings me much warmth to know that she has so many beautiful souls in her corner. You are all some of the most special and unique humans on this earth and I am grateful for all of you. Shine on, you crazy diamonds!! 

Amanda

Those are both insightful and powerful answers to a difficult question. Miss Moonstar, your words, in particular, should be shouted from the rooftops.

Well, Miah and Miss Moonstar, interviewing you as a couple has been a most interesting and informative experience and you deserve to be  congratulated on having given well thought out and honest answers, many clearly from your hearts. 

My hope is that those of us in our community who are willing to read and learn from the experiences of others will enjoy and find strength in reading our interview. 

Thank you for opening yourselves up to us so sincerely and freely,

Take care and stay safe,

AmandaJane

[immaturityofthomasastruc]

The Chloe-Saga

Regarding the whole Chloe-situation: I don’t get it. Just what exactly makes Astruc not only hate a character of his creation to this extent but also makes him not stop giving her more and more prominence in the actual show? Like, in S1 she was the quintessential high school bully. Hates the main character, has the same love interest, causes a lot of “problems/villain of the week”. And guess what? That’s perfectly fine as an archetype. She fulfilled her purpose and it was fun whenever she got put down a notch. That some fans latched onto her and her being redeemed? That’s what a fandom does. It takes characters and gives them a new spin – that does not mean they like what a character in canon does, it means they want to explore those characters outside their bubble. With the identity-shenanigans going on, there even was a pre-build reason for why Chloe might question herself. In S2 we then got the full package of explanations for why Chloe’s Chloe. And while some of them were a bit much and Chloe still did a lot of bad things that might even exceed the “justifications”, Chloe became more than an archetype and more like a character with a clearer background and needs and wishes. What did Astruc expect? Even when we don’t buy her background AND think she went far beyond moral boundaries, there still is a lot more to latch onto. And in S3 and in S4 she got more focus and excuses. Fought of an Akuma. Was explicitly targeted by the big bad and more than once hurt by her idol. Got more family drama and focus on how her family affects people. If we are truly meant to hate Chloe and see not one bit of goodness (which Astruc tells us too) just why are we getting all that focus and excuses? As a one-dimensional schoolyard bully it would have been a lot easier to simply hate her. But that role is apparently Lila’s turf now… The way I see her character and development: One of her traits from the very beginning was how much she liked Ladybug and how much it hurt her whenever LB rejected or renounced her in a way she could not wave aside. She even literally dressed up as Ladybug! In S2 when her mother was introduced, what was one of the first things Chloe did? She sat besides her and mimicked every single movement. For me these were the defining moments of Chloe’s potential to be good. A girl who just really craves the attention of powerful female role models that she can model herself after. A girl who is way more insecure than her bratty face lets on. A girl who has not yet really found herself. Audrey’s entire character essentially is a grown-up Chloe. Petty and nasty and kicking down at every opportunity. Seeing how Chloe reacted to her, mimicked her, and just wanted to be recognized by her, I see most of Chloe’s character essentially as her modelling herself after her. Which is not helped by her father essentially being a rubberstamp with authority, Sabrina being an extended arm, and the butler…being a butler. Ladybug was the counter-weight. It was obvious Chloe cared about her and her opinion of her. She was still flawed and at times outright cruel but there was a hint of progress. Be it her later appearances as Queen Bee where she was either willing to listen (Maledictator) or act as part of the team (Heroe’s Day) or the entire “rejected an Akuma”-saga complete with shielding Sabrina without anything to gain from it. For me the most hurtful moment was when Marinette in her endless goodness reconciled mother and daughter. Because ultimately that was part of what made Chloe continue to model herself after Audrey and what made her stop questioning if Audrey truly is a woman to be emulated. Double hurtful because with Ladybug off her pedestal she was back as the sole role model and because this is yet another thing that can be construed as ultimately being Marinette’s fault (which I don’t believe in and absolutely hate!). We had all these things. Neglectful mother she wanted to emulate in the hopes to be recognized. Secondary role model that cast her out for reasons pertaining to her sins of the past and even before often rejected her for reasons Chloe couldn’t know about. A lot of enablers who either can’t or won’t tell her ‘no’ or 'stop that’ [and we know Chloe at least listens when the few people she cares about tell her]. This is not a condemnation story, that is a tragedy! Which is another thing I am weirded out about. How can Chloe be an irredeemable demon who has not a semblance of goodness in her and yet we are expected to feel stabbed in the heart by the S3-finale? Either she had the potential to be good and it was a tragedy it was not meant to be, or she is an obvious devil who nobody should feel for or with. We can’t have both! Should I feel betrayed or should I feel like that was just Chloe upping her Chloeness?

---------------------------------------------------------------

According to what Astruc said, we were all supposed to feel betrayed by the Season 3 finale.

Chloe’s relationship with her mother is a real missed opportunity, as she was set up as a completely despicable person everyone hates, and of course, she reconciles with her while the writers never acknowledge the abuse. Seriously, Astruc doesn’t think Chloe being emotionally neglected by her mother for years to the point where she can’t even get her name right and developing a slight inferiority complex as a result counts as abuse.

THIS IS WHAT THOMAS ASTRUC ACTUALLY BELIEVES

Like you said, there have been plenty of plenty of irredeemable villains the audience still felt bad for when they were defeated because of how tragic their stories were.

Tai Lung from the original Kung Fu Panda is a good example. He was trained by Master Shifu, someone he saw as a father, and his skills grew, so did his desire for power. He saw not being granted the title of the Dragon Warrior as if he was denied something that was rightfully his. There’s also the fact that his desire to become the Dragon Warrior stemmed from his desire to make his father proud of him by achieving the greatest honor in Kung Fu.

Tai Lung: All I ever did, I did to make you PROUD! Tell me how proud you are, Shifu! Tell me! TELL ME! 

Shifu: (quietly) I have always been proud of you. From the first moment, I've been... proud of you. And it was my pride that blinded me. I loved you too much to see what you were becoming... what I was turning you into. I'm s... I'm sorry. 

Tai Lung: (hesitates for a moment before grabbing the injured Shifu) I don’t want your apology. I want my scroll!

Even though he stops for a second, Tai Lung still wants his power, ultimately shooting down the last chance he had at reconciling with his father. Both him and Shifu had problems that led to Tai Lung’s descent into villainy, but while one recognized his part, the other simply couldn’t comprehend he did anything wrong in the first place. THAT is how you do a tragic villain, not what we got with Chloe.

If Astruc wanted Chloe to be an irredeemable monster, he needed to show her meaner moments weren’t something to laugh at (something the show Kevin Can F**k Himself is doing a great job at in regards to the titular character by deconstructing sitcom cliches), and have the audience take her seriously as a threat, not a joke villain like in “Queen Banana”. If Chloe actually was a “deep character” like what Astruc obviously planned from the start, she should have been more than comic relief after betraying Ladybug.

[onesheeptwosheepandachicken]

26 Reasons why Qrow is not Ruby’s father and why Taiyang is Ruby’s father

In response to the toxic aspect of the fandom attacking CRWBY and demanding that their desires for Qrow be chosen over canon, or how they feel their theory is more valid than the show itself? I have researched RWBY to make this 26-point Discussion as to why Canon is valid, and fancanon is not when it comes to Qrow Branwen, Ruby Rose, Taiyang Xiao Long, and Summer Rose.

 1.       “Monty said NO”    Most obviously. Monty Oum.

   He said in this tweet that ruby and yang are half-sisters…half-sisters,  which means they share the same mom or dad…in this case Taiyang….

  https://twitter.com/montyoum/status/492070189731565568

Now people have claimed “he obviously meant step-sisters or cousins” Why is it that every time we show the English dictionary to you people or ask you to read it, that you claim you are being attacked or that you claim Monty was misleading us?

 2.       The writers said NO

   Miles Luna debunked this theory on Reddit…

   He pointed out that Ruby sees Qrow as a Role model, so she adapts her colors to be similar to his.

   And you don’t need somebody to be blood to be your role model.

https://www.reddit.com/r/RWBY/comments/7x3w4s/crwby_ama_w_miles_luna_kerry_shawcross_and_paula/du5d67g/?

 3. “Rooster Teeth said NO” Rooster Teeth even said that Qrow is "Ruby and Yang's Uncle" They also said “Ladies, he’s not your man”

https://twitter.com/RoosterTeeth/status/1067205612331782144

 4.  “But what if Summer had feelings for Qrow? Why does Qrow Serve Ozpin?” Qrow said in Volume 6 " No one wanted me... I was cursed... I gave my life to you because you gave me a place in this world... I thought I was finally doing some good... " So he was saying he wasn't wanted, so no relationship with Summer. SUMMER DID NOT WANT HIM. And he was literally saying he served Ozpin because Ozpin gave him purpose. It’s pretty sad how people think Qrow can only be a complex character if he obsesses over another person’s wife and child. What , you wanna make him Severus Snape, the Lilly Potter stalker who insulted a girl’s face and tried to poison a boy’s pet and publicly outed a teacher?

https://rwby.fandom.com/wiki/Qrow_Branwen/Quotes#So_That.27s_How_It_Is

5, "But Qrow could be lying" Except in volume 6 Qrow literally said "Don't lie...we're better than that"

And in volume 7?

" Long time ago. I just found working alone tends to be for the best "

" Gotta say, I’m still not really used to working with other Huntsmen in the field. "

And finally World Of Remnant on Patch.

" Nice place to raise a family, if you're into that sort of thing. "

https://rwby.fandom.com/wiki/Qrow_Branwen/Quotes#So_That.27s_How_It_Is

  6.  “Qrow fans claim that Ruby and Summer form a core part of Qrow’s character and backstory.” WRONG! The main accusation for demanding Rooster Teeth / CRWBY change the backstory for Qrow would accomplish nothing.

Raven already pushed Yang onto Taiyang to raise on his own.

Qrow forcing Tai to Raise Ruby alongside Yang while Qrow could regularly visit, and while Summer lived with Taiyang, Yang, and Ruby?

It would cheapen Qrow’s character….blood isn’t everything.  Neither are cliches.

 7. “But what if Qrow gave Ruby to Tai to raise after Summer’s death?” Volume Chapter 6, Burning the Candle.

Yang tells Blake that she (yang) and Ruby were raised together by Summer and Taiyang…not by Taiyang on his own, but by Summer and Taiyang.

Yang clearly had memories of being raised by Summer and Tai both,  which meant that Summer and Taiyang lived together raising Ruby and Yang for Several Years.

 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yZkN-53h5Os

  8. “Does Taiyang care about Summer or Ruby?” Taiyang was noted to have shut down when Summer didn’t come back…. Yang noted this in Volume 2 Chapter 6, and Ruby mentioned in the first episode of Volume 3 that Taiyang missed Summer. Qrow also said that Ruby is Taiyang’s “Special Angel”…. Ruby has also pointed out numerous times that Taiyang is Overprotective of Ruby. In fact, Ruby's conversation with Penny about overprotective fathers.

 9. “Qrow knows Taiyang is Ruby’s Father. Taiyang knows Ruby is Taiyang’s daughter. Qrow has referred to Taiyang as Ruby’s father during volume 3 and 7. Taiyang referred to Ruby as his daughter in volume 3.

 10. “Why didn’t Taiyang train Ruby in Martial Arts?” Taiyang is a martial arts fighter.   Ruby has neither the build nor the personality for ruthless hand to hand combat like her sister… Taiyang would trust Qrow, despite his semblance.   Remember how bad Ruby was in v5?

 11. “Qrow’s semblance is not what his fans exaggerate it to be”

Speaking of Qrow’s semblance? He was playing video games with his nieces,   taught at Signal Academy,   and could train Ruby… Clearly,  his semblance is not what theorists make it out to be.

 12. “Why doesn’t Qrow treat Yang the same way he treats Ruby?”

Yang is the daughter of Qrow’s sister,who abandoned the team.

During a one on one interaction between Qrow and Yang after yang vs mercury, Qrow called his own niece crazy, after she had been framed.

Qrow was not empathetic to Yang.

Qrow may not like Yang’s resemblance to Raven.

Ruby is the daughter of his two closest friends, so of course he’d prefer Ruby over Yang.

 13.  “Examples of Taiyang caring for Ruby.”

Volume 2 Ruby was excited when Taiyang sent a package in the mail, not even knowing it was Zwei.

Taiyang was at Ruby’s bedside in V3, and gave her a kiss on the forehead.

He also tried to bring her breakfast in bed.

Taiyang said he wanted to chase after Ruby, but had to nurse Yang back to health.

During the V8 broadcast, Taiyang was upset when the broadcast was cut.

 14. “Genetics research”

Black hair is the subtype of the pigment for blonde hair…

Also, Ruby’s got the same hair strand that Yang and Taiyang have.

Finally, black hair is more dominant.

So Ruby doesn’t need blonde hair to be Taiyang’s kid.

https://askinglot.com/is-black-hair-a-dominant-or-recessive-gene

https://www.quora.com/If-a-jet-black-haired-parent-and-a-blonde-parent-have-children-what-color-hair-would-the-children-likely-have

 15. “The STRQ Photo”

The photo....Qrow was with STRQ for four years...do you really think Qrow is not allowed to cry on the photo unless he was romantically involved? Can't a man grieve over the death of a female friend that he was NOT in a relationship with? Or are men not allowed to have female friends? Ichigo and Rukia from Bleach for example...friendship. They were his friends, his family. People seem obsessed with the idea that Qrow cannot care about a woman unless he was romantically involved or unless he's their bastard father.

 16. “Men and Women…as friends, platonic” Harry Potter as a book showed that a boy and a girl can interact and still be friends…

Why can’t Qrow be Summer’s friend?

Why does he have to be her lover?

We’ve seen Qrow talk about Innkeeper’s skirt lengths and leer at Barmaids who flirted with him.

Also, he’s shown to be bonding with both Clover and Robyn.

People act like he doesn't flirt with anyone , and yet he does.

 17. “Bad Luck Charm” Qrow has spent his whole life with his semblance, named after a Crow.

Raised by the Branwen bandit tribe.

“You and I are not the same, you don’t want the burden of my name” Both Branwen and Qrow are names that Qrow hates due to his semblance and past…

People may think of him as cool, but Qrow suffers from self-loathing.

So NO, the Bad Luck Charm song does NOT in fact allude to Qrow being Ruby’s father, but that Qrow hates himself, hence a major part of why he’s alcoholic.

Proof of which is his volume 6 exchange with Ozpin about being useful, which Qrow disagrees with, leading him to drink further. Yang literally said that she had never seen qrow so drunk before in v6.

And Ruby encourages his self-worth leading him to try giving up alcohol….

His alcoholism is tied to low-self-esteem, not relationships.

 18. Manga Anthology

Taiyang was shown in the Manga Anthology to have shut down upon Summer’s Death. That impacted his relationship with Ruby and Yang. Qrow? Is relatively unaffected. The good Uncle helping around the house. Taiyang haters and Qrow stans took this to demand that Qrow is entitled to Ruby, despite Taiyang recovering and doing his best to be a father. Anything Qrow does is worshipped like Mother Teresa, while anything Taiyang does, good or bad, is downplayed and smashed. Taiyang loved Summer so much he was devastated by her death. Qrow was unaffected. Think about that.

 19. “I like Brats” Why does Qrow spend time with kids he’s not related to? Because he likes kids. You know how there are adults who enjoy being around brats? That’s Qrow. He didn’t have romantic feelings for Summer, he liked being around her because she was like a kid. Similar to how Blake likes Ruby’s idealism? And trusts her leadership?

 20.  “Taiyang the 2-timer accusation”

A woman on youtube claimed that Taiyang was a 2-timer who cheated on raven with summer, as there was, in her and her friends’ minds, “no way that taiyang could be with half his team” When asked about TaiQrow as a joke, she was angered that people even ship TaiQrow.

But let me ask you this. Are you the same person you are now that you were 10 years ago? People claim that Qrow was somehow cool in beacon…because he’s cool now. But Taiyang, who raises two kids, and holds a job and a house…cannot be ruby’s father…because he’s not cool? And that somehow he was never cool? I’m sorry, I didn’t know you had to be cool to be a parent. I also had no idea people were only allowed to be in one relationship per lifetime. Raven freaking abandoned Tai for the tribe. Summer chose Taiyang over Qrow. People literally make Qrow out to be either an OC in a shipping fanfic, or a Naruto fanfic where Naruto is written to be fawned over by a girl whose canonical spouse, boyfriend, or male friend is somehow rewritten as evil.

1 year…..in 1 year since Raven abandoned Taiyang and Yang, Summer Rose the friend of Taiyang’s who he had known for 4 years, became more than a friend.

So no….Taiyang is not a two-timer…he moved on from Raven.

 22. “Why can’t Taiyang talk about Summer?” To WHO? He’s barely got 15 minutes of screentime, and the writers did NOT do him any favors when they had Qrow demand he leave so Qrow could tell Ruby a secret Ozpin trusted him with, before telling Ruby to run away from home leaving only a freaking note. Terrible daughter. Even Yang was prepared to do the same! To a man whose first wife abandoned him! At least Weiss has a legit reason for acting as she does against Jacques, several at least. Ruby? No. Now why would Taiyang talk about Summer’s fighting style to Yang when trying to get her to stop acting like Raven in her fighting style and semblance? Sure if there was more time…but RT at the end of the day isn’t some money-hungry political entity, it’s a startup at the end of the day, they don’t have the ability to do a full anime episode. Also, Taiyang cannot go out on these active missions…he was a schoolteacher who did not do missions until only recently…he was retired, remember.

 23. “These fanworks make more sense to me”

Qrow fans have tried using fanworks to justify their theory or ship, the same way Blacksun fans or Adam apologists make similar claims, and even Raven fans try to claim Raven is somehow a good mother. What do these fanworks do? Hate on Taiyang. Dismiss Ruby and Yang being half-blood siblings. Ignore multiple elements of the show or scenes. Occasionally shit-talk the writers.

Every time somebody tries to make a “rwby rewrite” or “rwby alt” or “Qrow is ruby’s father au” they cannot do it without completely rewriting the characters in so many forms and even the show, till Qrow, Raven, Taiyang, and Summer are NOTHING like they are in the show…And ONLY how a shipper wants qrow to be.

Or rewriting qrow to be nothing like he is in the show.

Most Alt or Rewrite consists of making Taiyang abusive, a cheater, or refusing to allow him to interact with Summer, while regularly pushing qrowxsummer at each other.

So no…it’s not that it makes sense to them through some fanart….a headcanon that has been debunked is no longer headcanon. A theory that is shut down is no longer a theory. There’s a reason anti-vaxxers and flat-earthers still exist. Because to them, their theories make more sense than reality. Which is why people still believe Qrow is Ruby’s father the same way people believe vaccines cause autism. Neither are true, and no amount of facts will shut them down, but they’re both popular theories.

 24. “Qrow Rings and Cross”

People claim that Qrow was married to Summer or that his cross represents him mourning Summer. Did the STRQ photo, in v3, the same volume as his appearance, not show Qrow with his rings, his cross, and angrily scowling, while Summer was right next to Taiyang?

 25. “What about Summer Rose’s choice?”

Remember how I said making Qrow’s character based on solely Ruby and Summer, ignoring everything regarding the tribe and ozpin giving him hope, and the grimm reaper…was bad writing? There’s a reason people hated v5. Raven was proven to be the deadbeat, Qrow was shown to have friends, and that Taiyang knew about Salem, and of course it was confirmed that Yang and Ruby again were sisters by Raven.

Now how about Summer? Team leader….took a man and a daughter who were abandoned by her friend…and made them her own. Yang calls Summer Rose “Supermom” and “Her Hero”…was literally willing to storm a bandit camp so Raven could use her portal to take Yang to Qrow, so she could get to Ruby. And yeah, I know the RWBY critics scream “why didn’t Yang just look for Ruby in Mistral?” It’s a bloody kingdom, and Yang was pursuing a lead, that Tai had given her, and Qrow told Yang he’d look after her sister. Remember that? Oh wait, RWBY Critics forget, my bad. Anyway, she’s more of a sister to Qrow than his blood sister Raven, she’s more of a mother to Yang than Raven, and she’s more of a spouse to Tai than Raven. Good Stepmother. Non-married couple. Relationship built on trust. Blood is not the same as family. (Example Weiss’s remark to her father) (Or Dom Toretto)

So making Summer into a throw-away character who dies so that a brooding jerk of an alcoholic can claim character development? Making a woman nothing except a throw-away for a man to get development is BAD WRITING. For God’s Sakes, even Pyrrha was written better than that! She interacted with team rwby, nora was always helping her out, and so was Ren (though those shakes are a crime against humanity” But when Qrow fans try to demand he’s ruby’s father? Their fanworks make Summer as much of a flat character as Preston Harvey from Fallout 4, where they make Summer unable to do anything but be obsessed with Qrow and having his child, similar to how Preston cannot think of anything other than “Another settlement needs your help, I’ll mark it on your pip-boy”

 26. Finally, the accusations that CRWBY are lying.

“You have to be ****** if you believe CRWBY when they say Qrow isn’t Ruby’s father” “CRWBY is lying, it’s what writers do” “It’s okay for writers to lie, it’s good for plot” “I’d prefer it if CRWBY was lying to us” “Monty is dead, the writers should change it now” “Monty is dead, nothing else in the writing matters” “Monty was hiding the truth from us” “CRWBY is hiding the truth about Qrow being Ruby’s father” “It makes sense for CRWBY to lie to us” Look at this…Twitter, Youtube, Facebook, Tumblr, Reddit, instagram…. The first quote? Was a woman who was using an anti-autism anti-disability slur defending the theory. Never have I ever seen people so obsessed with a  theory that they would deny reality and be rude to the very writers and original creator. But the QrowxSummer and Qrow is Ruby’s Father fandom group has made countless cases of this. THIS is how they defend their theory? And people upvote, like and support these remarks? SHAME SHAME SHAME

 Conclusion:

I get how people desire qrow to be Ruby’s father for ships or fanfics.

Even to where they make Taiyang a hated character just for the sake of making sure nobody disagrees with them.

But the attacking of RWBY and CRWBY, claiming that “this needs to be fixed”, or getting angry at RT for not giving you the non-canon ship you want? Claiming that just because you want it to be so, that somehow your ship/theory has “validity?”

That reflects poorly on the fandom and critics.

But then again…. It’s easy to ignore what’s real and what’s a fact that when theorists and ship-pushers and CRWBY Haters on youtube tells you to stop listening to monty and the writers, and instead believe whatever you want and claim whatever you want, Because surely you know what’s better for the show than the people who worked on it, right? Ha ha ha, no. THAT is the ULTIMATE disrespect somebody calling themselves a fan could ever give. And if you think or agree with that type of logic, you should look in the mirror.

I looked for backup sources to defend CRWBY and RWBY, you’ll find them below.

Backup sources include:

 https://aminoapps.com/c/rwby/page/blog/qrow-is-not-rubys-dad/422o_0rbCYuoXj36VoB7obK3MXPZRbPKkz5

 https://aminoapps.com/c/rwby/page/blog/why-the-qrow-is-rubys-father-theory-is-wrong/z668_nQlIxu0dmRdRpEPxqE3qlWlZEmoE2

 https://aminoapps.com/c/rwby/page/blog/qrow-cant-possibly-be-rubys-and-heres-why/8BB5_LPVCmu2bonkw8eEP3Yokg8m8zJlgNV

 https://aminoapps.com/c/rwby/page/blog/why-qrow-isnt-rubys-father/lXXx_5QoUQuPVGo3Wgko3wJ52mMBl7644P

 https://aminoapps.com/c/rwby/page/blog/is-qrow-rubys-father-short-answer-no/422o_0rbCYupDKezxPxpdje7dRn3nB8YvZ

 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KPbft3KJd6o

https://aminoapps.com/c/rwby/page/blog/qrow-is-rubys-dad-theory-debunk/d33g_pQEcbu1NKQoMEv0kmDpP6N8bmowkkq

[lucasbarr]

I had a sad thought guys.

I was thinking about an AU where Jack resurrects all of the people Sam and Dean have lost over the years at the end when they win. Also is Emma is alive but I feel that’s a given for this blog by now 😂 Particularly, I was thinking of Dean and Ellen, their relationship, and his relationship with his own daughter/children.

In canon, Ellen is the closest thing Dean had to a mother (probably other than sat Missouri, which is kinda a headcanon of mine since she was the one to introduce John to the life). And Jo the closest thing he had to a sister (other than Charlie). However, if they were to suddenly be resurrected their whole dynamic would be flipped.

Ellen died in 2009 at the age of 40 and Jo at the age of 24 which is tragic. They would be theses respective ages when the were resurrected in 2020 despite being 51 and 35. I just did the math and Dean will literally be older than Ellen when they’re resurrected. Sam is two years older than Jo but that’s not as important.

Having raised Emma, Jack, and whoever else you would like to imagine, Dean would probably understand Ellen so much more than he did back then. Especially raising a daughter like Emma, he’d get her overprotectiveness over Jo. Thinking back to their deaths, when he had Emma, would probably recontextualize it for him. Because he’d do anything to save his children, to give Emma he life he never had. And to do all of that only for her to die seconds before you…I think that would be a somber moment for him.

Though I think it would be weird for him to interact with Jo who is physically the same as Emma! Like he wouldn’t really put it together until he sees them together and realizes how young Jo was when she died. I’m sure she’d play if off but I think that would rock Dean to his core.

Though now I’m thinking of something less angsty where Emma, Krissy, Alex, Claire, Magda, Patience, Charlie, and Jo have a girls night. Things get lit on fire, they summon Rowena from hell, paint each other’s nails…it’s an all-around good time.

Though I think things between Mary and Ellen would be awkward at first. Kinda like how things were between her and her sons in the first part of S12. Because here is a woman who had a formative maternal relationship with her sons. Not that she liked her husband…which the both of them had in common.

I would have loved to see some bonding between Claire & Jo and Emma & Jo! Also maybe some Ellen & Emma bonding! Because she deserves all the positive female role models in her life.

[antiloreolympus]

11 Anti LO Asks

1. Zeus would make a much more compelling character if RS grounded his obsession with gaining respect in the context of his childhood: He could’ve been Rhea’s favourite kid and grew a huge ego/sense of entitlement as a result while feeling deeply under appreciated by his brothers and Hera for his instrumental role in rescuing them and his care for her respectively, unable to look past his own trauma and ego to see that they too are struggling with their own demons rather than neglecting him.

2. I’m gonna have disagree with that one anon saying narrators are always a sign of weak storytelling because that’s not always the truth. Hades the game for example has a narrator and it’s used very effectively to give it an fairytale-like feel, a funny thing for zag to comment on because he can hear them and he will often comment on the rude things they say, and also provides a bit of world building. A narrator is also good if it’s established beforehand who is saying the narration, such as a storyteller or prophet, and it can establish to the audience they are viewing something from the past, and they can speak when there are major shifts in the story, not throughout the whole thing. A narrator in LO isn’t even a bad idea, the issue is it should have been established much earlier, maybe even episode one is we’re being honest, instead of just coming out of nowhere to speak of stuff in the future? It’s also pretty purposely only being there to be a cliffhanger instead of even putting in effort to make it interesting enough for anyone to care or come back without the narration there basically begging them to care what’s going on. It’s very strange and shows a lack of confidence and effort in her writing to be so literally spelled out like that.

I agree with the other comments too. The font is atrocious. LO is usually really good with fonts and they picked one that was visually very ugly and hard to read with an even worse color. I didn’t even think the fonts would degrade too like the art, and yet here we are!

3. I love how rachel dropped the cover for vol 2 of LO and its just a treasure trove of book design failures. her name is on top, giving the impression both she is the title and she cares more about getting her own name out there over the actual story, empty space where the title should be, the title covering most of hades, the title being cramped so much to cover him, persephone being covered by volume two, the list goes on. the first cover wasnt much better, but this is much worse.

4. RS is willing to change aspects of the story according to fan speculation but isn't down to do anything that would retcon out the offensive stereotypes, the homophobia, or the character-assassination of apollo.

5. I’m pretty sure Hera and Echo will have an infidelity arc followed by betrayal thanks to Echo’s role in Zeus’s meddling. It’s already established that Hera is just as willing to cheat as Zeus is and Echo’s blue colouration and short hair is clearly reminiscent of Hades. Given how RS has stated that character colour palettes are symbolic, I wouldn’t overlook this detail (the one instance of RS actually sticking to her colour rules lol). Also, Ares’ comment just seems to imply it!

6. Yo I just saw RS Insta story- SHES ALREADY MAKING A VOLUME TWO BOOK???? When the first volume isn’t out yet?????? Tbh, I never expected this 

7. Daphne has more personality than Persephone. Though both came from the same deprives mortal realm background, Daphne is thriving. Unlike Persephone, she’s confident and willing to take control over her own life (though this is only illustrated in the context of her dating life which is sad af, female characters never get any other kind of agency in LO). Perse would be a more interesting protagonist if she had Daphne’s (still limited af) personality.

8. There seems to be a lot of infighting here regarding Myth Hades and Persephone and it's 'modern retelling' or butchering by RS.

All fighting aside on whether Hades was a good husband and Persephones role (or lack of agency) in the myth of the Kidnapping - what is actually wrong with appreciating the myth as is?

(Isn't the myth there to give an explanation as to why the seasons change? As well as being a story of a mother in grief over her lost daughter? And her fight to find her?)

Also, in that context, is there really something wrong with liking the... lets say more "modern" adaptations of the Myth where Hades and Persephone loved one another, so long as one understands and respects the original canon (sources) and culture from which it originated?

9. The way Daphne is drawn went from sweet girl-next-door to model with overfilled lips and too many surgical alterations to increase her sex appeal.. Her lips look like they’ve been stung by several bees in the latest FP what is up with that? It’s especially irksome since RS normally draws very nice looking full lips (I.e Persephone) but they just look so off on Daphne.

10. So Minthe being in the story so early on (and already dating Hades) is lets say an "interesting" narrative choice. Mainly because it feels like RS did this because she doesnt want to acknowledge that Hades may have loved someone other than Persephone.

Because (as far as I am aware) Minthe does not show up until after Hades and Persephone are already married. And Hades did care about Minthe (as I believe one anon mentioned - he named a mountain after her?) - and she was stomped on by Persephone for daring to say that Hades liked her more.

It feels like RS made this narrative choice because she wanted to (mess with the myths) showcase that Persephone is Hades 'One True Love' and the only way she could think do to that was to make Minthe a vicious abuser. Which is unfair.

11. Uh …. Why are they already publishing a volume 2 or LO only four months after the first one? If they keep that rate up won’t they catch up really quick to the actual comic and run out of stuff to publish? I would be pissed to get a book with a cover with effort put into it just to get rushed nonsense in the actual book. Girl take a break.

Also the logo is literally covering up half of the couple while there is a giant empty space above them so her name is the main focus. Either Rachel is shit at book cover design (likely) or she needs to stroke her ego real bad and make sure her own name is the main focus. Good lord. 

[linkspooky]

Eren and Historia

Eren and Historia have a connection to one another. No, I don’t think they are romantically connect, nor do I believe they are co-conspirators plotting to destroy the world together. However, the narrative is pushing the idea that Eren and HIstoria are somehow connected and continually pushing them next to each other.  Eren kissing Historia’s ring is the trigger for his vision that commits him to the path of destroying the world. Eren uses Historia as a reason to accelerate his plan. Eren confides his plan solely in Historia. The reason  this line is drawn between the two characters is that they are CHARACTER FOILS. Eren and Historia are two people who seem like opposites but they’re actually incredibly similiar to one another. Almost too similiar to ever et along. The extreme similarities between Eren and Historia, and their character foiling underneath the cut. 

1. Historia’s Regression

So I’ve gotten countless asks on my opinion of Historia’s behavior in the final arc. My opinion is that we’re being shown the result of her regression to her pre-uprising arc self. Is this the best writing choice for Historia’s character? I do not know. There are two schools of literary analysis that boil down to “Is the writing good?” or “what is the author trying to say?” and I much prefer to stick to the latter. I think the text is attempting to portray Historia regressing on her character arc, and as a person to mirror Eren’s own regression. 

Everybody is regressing in the final arc. Armin lets his poor self-esteem sabotage his decision making ability like he did in Trost. Mikasa is struggling to find a way to live without Eren and see herself as a person seperate from Eren because of her codependent nature, once again like Trost. Annie wants to pretend that this all has nothing to do with her, like in the female titan arc. Hange can’t make a decision without Erwin around and wants to leave it all up to him even though he’s literally dead. The characters in the final arc are written as still struggling with what we think they should have gotten over with in earlier arcs. Heck, Jean still beats up Reiner over what happened to Marco.

It’s not because after all this time the characters haven’t progressed in their character arcs at all. It’s because the story structure of Attack on Titan is chiastic. The beginning and the end are written to mirror each other. 

Chiastic structure, or chiastic pattern, is a literary technique in narrative motifs and other textual passages. An example of chiastic structure would be two ideas, A and B, together with variants A' and B', being presented as A,B,B',A'.

Sometimes instead of character development being a straight journey from point A to point B, it’s instead more like a helicopter hovering around the point, continually circling it. The character has brief moments of revelation where you think they’ve had their big change only to regress later. Lemme use this example from Tokyo Ghoul to illustrate my idea. 

A character seems to be progressing, and we believe they are, only to regress in the end. I think narratively there is a very strong reason for Isayama using this style of character development. Every single major character is either a child soldier right now just barely on the cusp of adulthood, or they like Levi were child soldiers at one point or another. The adults, few that they are, are all either cast as incapable of acting as strong decisive role models (Hange) or are killed off eventually (Erwin). 

It’s like what Magath expresses in his final words, these children were never allowed to have a normal life because of him. If the narrative is about the evils of using child soldiers on both sides, both the Scouting Corps and Marleyans, then it would make sense that every single character is portrayed as either a child unable to grow up or an adult that has continually failed them. 

What we are being shown is every major character with an arc struggling with being unable to truly grow past who they were as children. Even when given the oppurtunity to grow, they falter with it, because they are child soldiers stunted by their trauma and that’s not an easy thing to overcome. Rather than a straight line we’re shown a circular process. Gabi and Falco are the only characters being shown with fully straight line arcs, but they are also far simpler than the other characters because they are children, and not stunted adults acting like children. Armin is passive, day dreaming, indecisive like he was when he was a child. Mikasa is overly attached to Eren like she was when she was a child. Heck, even Connie’s major flawed decision this arc is wanting his mother to return. Whcih is a symbol of wanting to return to the safety of childhood that he was suddenly and abruptly cut off from. 

Okay, that was a long tangent but I hope I have made my point on what I mean by regression. Eren and Historia are paralleled with each other because they more than anyone else, are regressing to their childhood selves. Where we see at least hints of progress with other characters (Armin, MIkasa, Jean) indication that they will eventually rise to the responsibility of adulthood we see only stagnation for these two characters. It’s because once again Eren and Historia are incredibly similiar as people. Heck, even the fact that they’re regressing the most is paralleled. The same chapter in which Eren declares he’s using the child Ymir’s power to destroy the world, we’re shown a flashback of Historia first and foremost. 

Eren empathizes with little girl Ymir, and Historia was told as a child that she should learn to be like Ymir, always kind and always putting others first. They both see themselves in Ymir and it symbolizes why they are connected, because deep down they are both that powerless little child. 

There are two big connections between Eren and Historia immediately. Number one is that the inciting incident of their trauma is the same. Yes, Historia grew up in a household where she was eteranlly bullied and belittled where Eren grew up fairly love and secured but they both suffer from the same traumatic incident. 

A titan suddenly killed the person who was the symbol of unconditional love and security in their lives, for Eren it was his mother, and for Historia her older sister. In a situaiton where they were completely powerless, they watched a titan kill their security and destroy their home and are rendered homeless children after that point. They both join the titan corps as a way of survival. The reason that Eren is shown encouraging his father to pull the trigger and completely eliminate the Reiss family, is because narratively these two events are supposed to be connected. They’re narrative parallels. Eren suffered the loss of his mother which is the root of his trauma, and then has a hand in inflicting that same trauma on Historia. 

They are two people connected by the nature of their worst trauma and what it did to them. Every time they try to progress as people, they instead regress because what happened then was so fundamanetally damaging it robbed them of the ability to be able to grow up. They will never feel like they have the security that children need in order to grow into adults. 

Historia and Eren are mirror images even in their lives. Eren is an ordinary child given an ordinary childhood. Historia was marked as different from birth and raised as a special person. However, they ended up in relatively the same position. They both regress. The nature of Eren’s regression should be obvious because he’s trying to destroy the world. In essence Eren has remained the same character all throughout, his primary goal was to kill all the titans beyond the walls, it’s just his target that has changed. 

So, let’s focus instead of how Historia has regressed. I will say before I begin though that Eren and Historia regress as opposites. Eren will always choose to be active, even if it means stealing agency from others. Historia will always choose to be passive, even if she has power over others. When they are pushed into a corner by circumstances they fall back on their worst habits and that’s why we see them regress. Externally, they have different mechanisms to handle it. Eren steals agency, Historia gives up agency. Internally, it’s practically for the same reason, because whatever security they have is continually ripped away from them leaving them unable to grow as people. 

So what is Historia’s regression? Basically Historia, like Eren is lacking of a sense of self. Historia has no consistency deep down to show who she is. Even with most of the other characters as childish as they can be have this, Mikasa is overprotective and likes family, Armin is a dreamer who wants to explore the world, Annie is self centered and wants a peaceful life. Eren even comments about this in regards to himself when comparing himself to Eren. Eren centers himself around violence, war, and his hatred. Armin has something else besides fighting, in order to build himself around. Therefore, Eren considers himself lacking as a person in comparison to Armin. Who would Eren be if he wasn’t trying to destroy all the titans? That’s a difficult question to answer. 

Historia is much the same way. Historia builds herself and her self of identity around the roles that other people ask her to play. The little girl Ymir is kind because she always did what others ask of her. Historia is always performing some role for the sake of everybody around her. 

I wouldn’t say that Historia’s arc in Uprising ends on a triumphant note, but rather an ambiguous one. The arcs aren’t lines, they’re circular. Historia even questions herself if she’s moving for the sake of herself or others. 

Here is how I see uprising. Your interpretation might differ. Historia steps out of the role of Krista. Historia, tries to be herself for a moment. At the end of the arc, rather than true liberation Historia chooses to step back into the role of queen. The only slight progress made is that she doesn’t entirely listen to Erwin’s orders. However, even her act of slaying a titan within the wall was a pre-planend action, a performance. It’s just one Historia altered slightly to give herself a more centered role.

If Historia is not someone moving to help others than who is she? We know she’s spunky, angry, etc. etc. but as a character she hasn’t really developed goals or wants and needs outside of that. We continually see her on the brink of that point, but never quite crossing the line. 

Eren and Historia are at the center of their existence very performative people. The reason nobody quite understands Eren is that he’s always putting on an act around other people. 

Eren and HIstoria even doubt the same things in chapter 68. That is to say, they doubt themselves. They doubt if they are really truly people who are capable of moving for themselves. Eren sees himself as someone who has nothing special about him, and therefore doesn’t matter. Deep down he’s always viewed himself as a weak and pathetic person. Historia doesn’t think she’s capable of making decisions for herself. It’s because they’ve been continually made to feel helpless all of their lives, that they doubt themselves to this degree. 

Their response to this is to perform for everyody else around them. Eren si continually performing as this super strong, determined child ready to fight the whole world. Whereas, Historia is performing in the roles that other people give her. She is Krista Lenz. She is the queen Historia Reiss. She is, always, always, always, what other people need her to be. Whereas, Eren performs what he wants to be, which is powerful. 

When Historia and Eren break down it is shown just how deeply similiar they are inside. They become what they continually are made to feel like, helpless children. Eren is constantly boasting about how he is going to kill all the titans, and yet deep down he’s always believed that he was all talk and that for him there was nothing behind those words. 

It’s the same for Historia just in an opposite direction. Historia is constantly talking about helping people, but deep down she doesn’t see herself as a genuinely altruistic person. Not only does she see herself as helpless (therefore incapable of helping people because she can’t help herself) but she sees her motivations for helping people as selfish. 

In the Uprising arc we even see this parallel. I mean I know many people interpret this as Historia’s big moment of independence, which is also a valid interpretation. I’m just giving you my interpretation. I also see this as Historia having a massive mental breakdown in the middle of a crisis moment. When they are pushed to their absolute limits and they can no longer pretend, Historia and Eren both break down and we see what they view themselves as. Eren sees himself as a crying and begging child insignificant, unpowerful, and helpless. Historia sees herself as a selfish child and a bad person. This is also something that reflects their upbringing. Historia was continually made to feel selfish due to being an abused bastard, for wanting even the most basic necessities a child needs like love and security. Eren had his security ripped away suddenly when his mother died and he was at the time, a helpless, crying child only able to watch. 

When Eren breaks down he says the same thing always. Nothing has changed from back then. Nothing has changed from when I saw my mother died. When Historia breaks down she says she can’t live up to the expectations of other people around her. 

Eren and Historia both see themselves as fundamentally unable to change from who they were as children, and that’s why we see them regressing to their most childlike selves here in this final arc. 

2. What is the point of Uprising Arc, then?

I know I read uprising differently from most of the people on this site. However, I’m not saying that Historia didn’t grow in Uprising at all, or even that she doesn’t have a chance to grow. Honestly, I think Uprising does a good job at portraying the complexity of Historia’s character and why it’s really, really hard for her to grow in a straightforward manner. She’s not really the heroine of the story where she defeats the bad guy, and then overcomes her flaw in a dramatic fashion at the end of the arc. 

Okay, so I’m going to try to address how Historia’s arc is still... you know, an arc, even though it doesn’t continue on in a straightforward fashion from Uprising. Uprising isn’t pointless because it shows us the great depth and complexity of HIstoria’s character, and also establishes why it is so hard for her to change. It’s not a straightforward arc, more of a dig into her psyche. Historia steps out of the role, Historia tries to be true self for a moment, Historia steps into another role at the end of the arc. It may seem pointless to read it this way, but I’m going to try to dig in from this point forward to show the complexity that this demonstrates. 

So, like I said Historia is a character who lacks a sense of self. The reason that Eren perceives this of her so strongly that it’s what forges their friendship in this arc is because Eren is the same way. 

Eren picks up on the fact that Historia was always striving to meet the expectations of everyone around her, because Eren is very much the same person. The kill all the titans thing is an act. Everyone around him believes it to such an extent that not a single person, even his closest childhood friends understood him enough until it was too late. 

Eren also tells Historia he sees her as a normal girl, because it’s who Eren wants to be accepted as, but feels like he never can be. Before I go into uprising itself there’s the big inciting events for both of them that lead into where their characters are in the lead up to Uprising. 

Eren and Historia both have a moment with their respective love interests in the prelude to this arc. Historia begs Ymir to come back with her so they can both live on as themselves. Mikasa tells Eren that he doesn’t need to be able to defeat titans, that what he did for her was showing her the small kindness of wrapping her scarf around him that day was enough for her. 

It’s Mikasa and Historia who reach out, but Ymir and Eren both refuse that closeness. Eren chooses to fight, and Ymir chooses to sacrifice herself to Reiner and Bertolt. 

I know a lot of people take issue with this writing choice, but sorry this post isn’t about the quality of the writing, just how it all comes together in the big picture. The point is, Historia and Eren are both offered what they have always wanted which is to live as themselves with a person who loves them for who they are only for it to get them taken away. 

There’s also an interesting irony written in Ymir’s death. Historia has always idealized the path of a martyr. She always thought living a good, selfless, altruistic life is what would earn her the love of her sister. 

Part of the problem is, the only source of love both Eren and Historia has was taken away so suddenly. Historia got the idea in her head, that all love was conditional and she had to act good in order to earn that love because love was never freely given to her. So Historia’s martyr act is a way to earn love. However, Ymir’s choice inflicts upon Historia the pain other people feel when she decides to martyr herself. 

The path of the martyr isn’t a good one, it’s thorny, and wracked with pain. What Ymir does is a genuine act of altruism. She makes a choice out of sympathy for both Reiner and Bertolt who have suffered all their lives just like her, and also  a belief her sacrifice will buy something for HIstoria in the bigger picture. It’s at least partially an altruistic decision, and Historia’s not happy about it at all, she’s downright bitter. Because, Historia isn’t the altruist deep down inside she pretends to be. Historia idealizes self sacrifice and selflessness, but when faced with the harsh reality and consequences of such behavior she realizes this is not what she wants. 

Ymir’s death throws the narrative Historia has always held onto into question, because she’s now the victim of somebody else’s self sacrifice. By killing herself, Ymir has also deprived Historia of her place in the world. Which sends her into self doubt. This moment of reflection is once again where we see the real Historia. 

Eren calls out the fact that Historia is actually very selfish. When she’s not performing goodness, most of her worries and actions are centered around herself. Everyone is out risking her lives, and Historia is kind of busy like “Who am I? Why won’t people love me for the real me?” These questions are selfish because they are focused and centered around the self. Historia is, egocentric in the way a child is, and the way that Eren is, because she doesn’t have a fully developed self. 

Uprising is where we’re shown very clearly that rather than having a centralized sense of self, a goal to focus herself around, all of these things normal characters have Historia is someone who wildly swings between two.

Historia is indecisive on whether or not Krista or Historia constitutes the real her. There is the act that Historia portrays on the surface as someone who always worries about others, and then her history (Gosh, golly gee I wonder why her real name is Historia... obvious symbolism is obvious). The question for HIstoria is which one she should let efine her, is she defined by the trauma she accumulated by being born into this world, or the person she wants to be. Historia’s failure to reconcile herself between the two extremes is what results in her behavior, as swinging back and forth between both.

I don’t believe that the point of uprising is to show Historia finally reconciling these two, but rather to show her wildly swinging between the two. HIstoria is someone who wildly swings between great feats of selfishness and selflessness.

We are given several hints of Historia’s progress in this arc, but also several unhealthy signs of her back sliding. For exmaple there’s the scene where Levi infamously bullies Historia into calling herself the queen.  One this scene fundamentally demosntrates what Historia’s problem is, she can’t make decisions or act for herself because she doesn’t really know what she wants. 

And when Levi beats her up and pushes her, she decides to perform again. Now the question is if you see the final climactic scene of Uprising as her triumphantly overcoming this cycle or falling back into it. My interpretation is that it portrays the swinging between. 

HIstoria, confronted with the feelings of insecurity she’s had since childhood unable to feel consistently loved or that she was even worthy of love is about to fall back on her mechanism of total and complete selflessness. Believing that her self sacrifice will at least mean she was a good person that meant something to the world, that her self sacrifice will earn her something. The reason that Eren yells I’M NOT NECESSARY is it’s because what their trauma made them feel like, and deep down what they’re afraid of hearing. 

Historia first appears entirely passive and selfless, then she takes an active role and screams she’s the worst girl on earth and she’d rather let the whole world die than sacrifice one person. Her response isn’t to reconcile these two entirely divergent selves, but rather we’re being shown her flipping between them. 

Historia declares one moment she doesn’t care about the rest of the world they can all die, and the next moment she says that if there’s a crying child she will always help. What we see is not a reconciliation so much but rather a flipping between, because it’s Historia’s tendency to swing back and forth between the two. 

Here’s my defense of my point. Uprising ends on an ambiguous note. As I’ve said above uprising doesn’t end on Historia becoming her full realized self, but rather wondering if she’s become her full realized self. 

Not only that but everything that seems like it was forward progress initially in uprising becomes undone later. Erwin is freed in Uprising, Erwin dies the next arc. Eren says he doesn’t need to become a special person to change the world, Eren is back on his bullshit by the time skip. The uprising puts the good guys in charge of the government and so now the government is no longer an obstacle to the path of saving humanity. The Jaegerists come take over in a second uprising, and the government becomes an obstacle once more. Even the decision they made to never feed Historia to a titan in order to sacrifice the world, is something the main characters go back on as they debate on whether or not to have her eat Zeke. Everything that seems like it’s forward progress becomes undone.

So why would Historia’s arc not become undone, too? This isn’t a question of quality of the writing. If you think this is a bad writing decisoin you’re completely valid I just am trying to remind you this isn’t the place to have that discussion. The deicsion to regress however, portrays the conflicts the characters are dealing with as cyclical ones. My argument is that as a whole Attack on Titan is being written as a cyclical story where characters circle. 

Eren and Historia are just the two biggest contenders of this regression. Which is why we see them conspiring together in this the final arc. (Yes there is a problem with Historia being mainly offscreened) however narratively the decisions we are shown Historia making in this arc are all passive ones. Also ones meant to pacify the people around her. 

Eren will always choose to be the activest character he possibly can, and to take agency even if it means stealing it from others. Historia will always choose to be passive, and will give up agency even if it means people steal things away from her.  

We are kept mostly out of Historia’s head. We are also kept mostly out of Eren’s head. What we are being shown recently though is a continuation of what we witnessed in uprising. Uprising ended with the question of if Historia is Krista Lenz, or Historia Reiss unresolved. 

This scene is Eren browbeating Historia into submission so she’ll go along with this plan. However, for HIstoria it’s also a confrontation with both sides of herself that she has shown to other people. Eren is basically telling HIstoria there are two wildly different hers, there is the Historia who would sacrifice herself, and the Historia who would say fuck the entire world she’s not sacrificing herself even if it makes herself the enemy of humanity. 

My argument is that the story has gone to great length to portray that to some extent, both of these HIstorias are real. Historia is someone who swings between wild feats of selfness and selfishness. Historia can say both of these things and mean them, that she wants to sacrifice herself for the sake of the world, fuck the world she wants to be herself. 

The same way Eren can imprison his friends, tell Mikasa she’s a slave, tell Armin he’s useless and that he’s despised both of them always, and also believes that he’s doing all of this for the love of his friends. Eren can say both and mean both, because he also does this inconsistent swinging back and forth. 

The foiling between the two of them shows how utterly broken Eren and Historia are as people due to the neglect they faced as children. It’s not actually a question of whether they are good or bad people. (Though Eren, is a jerk). It’s to show how unhealthy these mechanisms are. They mechanisms they rely on to survive, do not allow them to grow or develop all the way as people so they remain stunted. Historia is still in an incredibly unhealthy and precarious position in regards to her identity. Eren’s mechanism is to take agency, Historia’s is to give it up, the result however is the same between the both of them.

We see Historia make a choice. In all fairness we don’t know what that choice is. However, we also know what she didn’t choose. She knew what Eren was going to run off and do, and what he was planning, and she didn’t stop him. 

Another important part of the final arc is showing how everybody else’s decisions also led to Eren doing what he did. Armin’s choice to never confront Eren’s real self turned him into Eren’s enabler. Mikasa’s inability to try to live without Eren, made her completely unable to see this coming. The scout corps in general was unable to stop Eren, because they didn’t understand him. Historia also made a choice to enable the situation to happen in some way, because she didn’t choose to just... tell somebody else what Eren was planning, or stop it. 

While yes, she may be trying to stop it all on her own. It’s still a choice she made that’s frighteningly similiar to the choices Eren has been making all along. That is the choice not to trust people, the choice not to openly communicate what she inteded, the choice to instead go off on her own and try to solve everything by herself. 

That’s also the choice she always makes when backed up against a wall, and therefore it’s a sign of regression. I don’t think Historia is conspiring with Eren or even agrees with him. However, I do think she has made a similiar choice as Eren which is to try and attempt to solve everything on her own without trusting the others which is why we’re seeing her get so much foiling with Eren in this the final arc. 

Historia will overcome this regression when rather than swinging between Historia Reiss, and Krista Lenz, that she is both, and always has been both. You are who you are deep down inside. You are also who you pretend to be. The choice to show Historia’s wavering between makes her arc longer, difficult, more frustrating, but it also shows how hard it is for Historia. 

It shows the struggle of someone like Historia with lifelong trauma. How hard it is for her, not to be a queen, or a good girl. How fundamentally, it’s difficult for her to even juts be a normal person. And how in the end that’s what she is fighting for, to rediscover herself as a normal girl once more after being denied that by the environment around her her entire life. Historia too, can be a normal girl in the face of all that trauma. 

[jalapeno-princess]

Got7 Most to Least Likely to Get Married and Start a Family

This was requested by one of my favorite followers (and just human beings in general) on here, the amazing @safetypineapples​ thank you for the request love I hope you enjoy it ☺️

Disclaimer: This is strictly my personal opinion based on what I’ve observed in the last three years I’m sure they would all be such amazing husbands and fathers if they decide to get married and start having families I’m sorry if you disagree but I did have fun doing this so please don’t hesitate to send it more requests!!!

MOST

Mark: This one is a no brainer. After watching the Ask In A Box video when he was asked where he sees himself in ten years, he didn’t hesitate to say “married”. From what I’ve seen with how he is with the guys and towards the staff I can tell he’s such a kind-hearted, generous and well-mannered person. He always puts others before himself and makes sure everyone is taken cared of before tending to his own needs. Mark also gives off such boyfriend vibes and I know in my gut that there is 100% chance he is a very loving and doting boyfriend; the type to memorize his significant other’s coffee order, to buy them things that reminds him of them, to check up on them every now and then to make sure they’re eating their meals on time and getting well deserved rest I mean—just look at how he treats Milo that man is so in love with that cute little dog I’m not being biased because I love that man with my entire fucking soul but it’s the truth. I know the guys playfully bully him about being the most sensitive member, but unlike other guys who consider having feelings and being sensitive a feminine trait, Mark embraces that shit (big dick energy) like, he’s not afraid to cry it just shows that he cares a lot. I hope whoever he ends up marrying one day knows just how lucky she is to have him. Honestly, he’s such a family man—he spends every free moment with his family and you can tell that he really misses them. I’m sure he probably feels bad that he had to leave his family at such a young age, especially Joey because it must’ve been hard having to grow up without your main role model so now he gives to Joey whatever he possibly can to help him out he donated money to Joey’s charity, supports his gaming streams and buys him gifts almost every single time I’m not crying you are. Also, he never fails to go and support the other members in their solo activities (wearing their merch, attending their solo fan meets, promoting their music). He just seems like such a supportive and loyal person. The way he interacts with his nieces is extremely adorable, what more when he has his own kids? And when there are kids around, he always is so good with interacting with them and making them feel comfortable. I’m sure if he wasn’t an idol, he would’ve started a family a long time ago and I have a feeling that might be one of the things he dislikes about being an idol. The idea of father Mark is making me scream ugh I just know he’s going to be the best dad.

Jinyoung: Just like Mark, Jinyoung gives me family man vibes. He is quite the gentleman towards every single woman he comes in contact with; his co-stars, female idols, makeup artists and staff members. I know he is such an amazing actor, but sometimes acting can only go so far—the way he kisses, touches and talks with his co-stars makes me feel like he is like that in person also; very romantic, gentle and sensual. He is also very good with kids (he couldn’t stop hugging that little boy who interviewed him one time it still makes me cry to this day) and back in that one real got7 episode, he was doing THE MOST to make sure one of the little girls chose him. But even if it was a competition, he seemed to have fun entertaining the two girls and it’s not easy taking care of children. On the set of He Is Psychometric, he was so sweet towards all the children; holding them, making them laugh, playing around with them. Also, being the youngest, it seems as though his sisters are very protective over him and it’s obvious that they have a very tight bond. I mean, he used to refer to himself as the mother of Got7, so I feel like he has caretaking traits and knows how to provide for the ones that he loves. The way he interacts with the other guys also gives it away; he might be playful and mischievous when it comes to Yugyeom, BamBam and sometimes even Jaebeom, but he can also be very defensive when it comes to them. All in all, I feel that Jinyoung is focused on being an actor and an idol, but once he’s done with his military enlistment and when Got7 decide to start slowing down in order to live domestic lives (which won’t be for a while please don’t come for me I’m begging) then he will start focusing on his personal life.

Jackson: I had a hard time choosing between Jinyoung and Jackson on who should be in second place just because Jackson seems like he really wants to start a family as soon as he can like he talks about it all the time. When he attended his best friend’s wedding, he just seemed so happy and he made it known that he couldn’t wait until it was his turn to be at the altar. I just know this man is so amazing when it comes to women like he is a FEMINIST and he’s one of the only idols I know who isn’t afraid to talk highly about female idols or just women in general like in my opinion, he doesn’t seem like the type who would be upset if it came out that he was in a relationship. Just look at how he treats his mom—the way a man is with his mother just shows the kind of man he’ll be in a relationship. He is always so quick to give a girl his jacket, cover them up if they are uncomfortable with what they are wearing or to feed them (he fed a fan once I don’t know what war she fought in her past life for that to happen but shit why wasn’t it me). On Let Go Of My Baby, he did not let any child cry for less than a couple of seconds before running to their rescue like that show was honestly so cute it just gave us a glimpse of what an amazing father he will be one day. He also held them whenever they felt homesick and even when he scolded one of them for playing around, he picked her up and apologized. Even when it comes to his niece; especially since he only sees her a few times every year, he puts that little girl on a pedestal. I just feel like right now, his main priority is his career and he wants to wait for it to simmer down before he starts settling down.

Youngjae: I still have yet to witness Youngjae even talking to a woman (other than staff members and fans) and it’s probably just me, but he doesn’t seem like the type to really put himself out there as much as the other members do when it comes to talking with other girls but from what I’ve read, he is a really good friend (and was one of the only people who helped Mina from AOA with the whole Jimin situation) so it’s obvious he genuinely cares for those he is close to. And if it’s any consolation; just look at the way he loves Coco like I’ve never seen someone love anyone as much as Youngjae loves Coco. But he’s such a sweet and kindhearted person (his laugh could honestly cure cancer don’t @ me) and from the videos I’ve watched, he is also very sensitive and that just proves he has a heart of gold. He said that he wants a daughter like the little girl in miracle because she was so cute so it’s obvious he does want a family some day. He might not be the type to go all out when it comes to showing affection or interest in communicating with women (maybe he just doesn’t want unnecessary controversy) (poor idols have to worry about what people would say if they were to even just wave to someone of the other sex) but he might be the type to do it in private. I’m sure he’s a gentleman, but more of the kind of person to do it secretly in order to prevent wandering eyes or irrelevant rumors. I don’t see posts of his nieces and nephews on social media as much as I do with Jackson and Mark, but then again maybe his sister isn’t the type to show off her kids. However, he seems like such a doting uncle in that one video at their concert in Korea when his nephew yelled his name (it was so fucking cute).

Jaebeom: This man’s mind never fails to intrigue me. With a lot of his songs, he is either really romantic, angsty or really horny there is no in between. The guys say that he is the type to get really shy and act like a dork in front of the girl he likes and honestly, even if he tries his best to come off as “chic and sexy” this man is a literal ball of fluff. He seems like the biggest momma’s boy and I feel it’s because growing up, it was just him and his mom until she met his stepdad. If you watch the way he acts towards his mom, his personality is that of a little kid. From my personal experience of having a single mother, I’m sure it was hard for him watching his mom struggle as a single mother raising him all on her own, so he just wants to give back to her what she deserves and I know he is probably like that in relationships also. He claims that he writes songs based on what he reads in books and watches in movies, but with how the boys tease him about how romantic he can be, I know he writes songs based on personal experience. He has five cats and he literally talks to them like they’re children (and the fact that he doesn’t want to post about them because he wants to give them their privacy) makes my heart so warm I can’t even explain it like I know he says his fans are his friends, but there are some things he wants to keep to himself and I respect that. There was one Vlive where he did say he doesn’t plan on having kids but he does want to get married some day. As much as I think he would be a great dad, if he doesn’t see himself having kids then that’s totally up to him. Even if he is so soft whenever he is around children, it’s another thing when having your own kids. Who knows though, maybe one day he’ll come to the realization that he does want a big family. As a leader, he does such an amazing job with making sure all members are happy and healthy (he might present himself as this big, scary dude but he has the biggest weakness for his members you can tell he loves those 6 boys with his entire being)(Im Jaebeom is the best leader in Kpop I don’t make the rules). Also, when he talks, he comes off to be very insecure and he’s the type who isn’t afraid to speak his mind even if he knows it might be controversial so I get the vibe that he is very vulnerable. He might seem like a dominant person, but I think that he’s willing to be such a submissive ball of cheese to the lucky girl who owns his heart. Idk man, but he also seems like the type to get really hurt over a break up (I will fight anyone who breaks this man’s heart deadass).

Yugyeom: As the youngest of the group and just like BamBam, I don’t think he’s really think about getting married or settling down any time soon. Honestly, Yugyeom seems like the type who would start having a family in his late 30s/early 40s just because he wants to give his full attention to his career. When Got7 first started out, he always seemed so shy when it came to talking with other girls, and I feel as if at one point, he was insecure about approaching girls, but now he just oozes confidence and sex appeal. I’m not saying he hasn’t dated anyone before (I’m sure he’s had a couple of relationships or at least a few flings) but he doesn’t strike me as someone whose main priority is a relationship as of right now. He’s always making music, preparing choreographies and producing songs, so as much as he wants to date, his girlfriend might not be the top of his list. A lot of his songs are sexual, so maybe a lot of the relationships he’s pursued were sexual rather than romantic and domestic (but what do I know). I haven’t really heard him talk about what he plans on doing once Got7 no longer are performing and making music as much; but sometimes it’s the ones we’d least expect who have dreams of getting married and starting big families. In the few reactions I’ve watched with him and kids, he seems to have a lot of fun teasing them and playing games with him and I think it’s because he’s still somewhat of a kid himself. I think he’s willing to change his outlook on relationships when it comes to the right person and he’ll be willing to fit them in to his busy schedule if he really loves them. Maybe after he finishes his military enlistment and decides that it’s time to start setting his focus on something other than his career, he will take the leap and get in to a full-blown relationship.

BamBam: Okay, just because I put him as the last one doesn’t mean I don’t think he wouldn’t want to settle down or have a family. But I feel like both BamBam and Yugyeom are still so young that getting married and having kids is way in the back of their minds as of right now. When the time comes, I just know BamBam is going to be such an amazing father. Just watching The Return of Superman and the way he took such amazing care of that little girl proves that he has a weak spot for kids. He’s even an uncle now and I really want him to go back to Thailand so he can finally meet his nephew. Unlike the older members, I haven’t really seen BamBam interact with women other than the few clips of when they were younger (and he was always such a flirt). In the episode of Hello Counselor he told one of the other celebrities on the show that he didn’t have time to date and his job kind of prevents him from experiencing what it’s really like to be in a relationship (but I’m pretty sure he and all of the members have been in relationships) however, they’re always so busy and probably don’t have the time nor the privacy to really go outside and walk around freely with their significant others. The guys also make jokes about how he’s narcissistic and pretty in to himself (Jackson made the joke that if he were to date someone, he would focus more on himself than his partner) but I don’t think he would be the type to do so. Like I said, he’s still young to be thinking about what his future with a family looks like but who knows? He might just surprise us all and be the first one to get married then you can all disregard this post HAHAHAHA. Deep down, I know BamBam is a genuine person and he will be such a wonderful husband and father one day.

LEAST

[that-fandom-pan]

Obey Me OC Profile!

Finally decided to post something myself here! Here’s the profile of my Obey Me OC, Rulgrodath.

Name: Rulgrodath

AKA: Ru

Birthday: Jan 13th

Zodiac: Capricorn

Favourite colour/colour scheme: Black, green, blue and silver

Scent: Ocean – seaweed, sea salt.

Height: 5’3’’

Voice: Strong but pretty quiet most of the time, very sarcastic when she’s angry, ranges between alto and soprano tones because of her music career, if she’s talking and she wants someone to hear, they know about it. Her voice is loudest when she’s angry, but she tends to go very quiet beforehand, and speaks through gritted teeth before she blows up.

Eyes: Yellow with a slit, catlike pupil

Hair: Dark brown, reaches about ¾ down her back, has a slightly lopsided fringe parting 

Body: 

Demon form: One pair of large black feathered wings with an iridescent sheen of green and blue, two sets of horns, one curling down either side of her head and two sets of horns, one curling down the sides of her head, one sticking up, green and blue scales on her temples, jaw and neck, long black green and blue feathered tail, black feathers around her shoulders and neck, usually wears a set of black gloves with two sets of finger armour on the index and middle finger of her right hand, black leggings and tank top (occasionally a black dress).

Human(ish) form: very skinny, no horns or wings, still has the scales, wears the same finger armour as in her demon form but without the gloves, hoodies or fluffy jumpers and leggings or sweatpants depending on how she feels, and a necklace Levi bought for her at a Comic Con as a sign of friendship.

Obsessions/habits: Can have severe body issues at times as it reminds her of how she died, this is what most of her breakdowns are based on, very protective of people she cares about, can overthink a lot, if nervous she’ll either bite her lip or mess with her hands (e.g. tapping, wringing her hands, cracking her knuckles), if she’s wearing a necklace or jewellery she’ll mess with that or her hair, will absorb herself in music or games when she’s upset, can verbally and emotionally blow up if she’s pushed too far, is also pretty self conscious about her height as compared to most demons she is very small due to her originally being a human.

Sweet spot/Sensitive place: Top of her head and behind her ears - she will start purring like a cat, very ticklish, will punch or try to freeze whoever is tickling her unless they are very close (e.g. Mammon, Astro*, Hiris**). 

Talents: Musician, very talented vocalist, good at comforting people when they're having bad days and cheering them up, not afraid to stand up for herself and other, can be quite terrifying at times, notices small details pretty often, can read body language and pick up on details of a person's attitude, personality and actions

Faults/sins: Envy and Pride, as those are what killed her, severe body issues, has a tendency of putting others above her own wellbeing, inner conflict of wanting to be perfect and knowing that is self destructive, a bit of a people pleaser,

Special skills/powers: Water magic, calming voice.

Music taste: Very wide, varies from jazz/swing to modern pop, film and game soundtracks to classical music, rock to musicals. The only kind of music she doesn't particularly like is reggae.

Personality: Kind, a little overprotective, a 'mum' friend to anyone she cares about, not afraid to speak her mind, will stand up for others, tough outside, soft inside.

Nicknames: RuRu (Mammon), Treasure (Mammon), Player 3 (Levi), Water Witch, Ice Queen/Ice Witch/Snow Witch, White Witch 

Backstory key points: Grew up in a family of musicians, was heavily praised throughout her life, grew envious of other musicians she thought were better than her, which led to her practicing almost constantly with no breaks. Died of starvation, dehydration and exhaustion. Was reborn in the Devildom as a demon of Envy and Pride. Met Levi at a Comic Con - they literally ran into each other, Levi in Lord of Shadows cosplay, Ru in Female Henry cosplay on her way to perform on stage, they bonded after the performance. Stayed in contact online for a while before meeting up in cosplay a few times, then to hang out as friends. Levi eventually brought her back to HOL to play games, where she was introduced to his brothers.

Animal theme: Feathered dragon/bald eagle

Relations to other characters:

Lucifer: Heavy dislike because of how harsh he can be to his brothers, especially Mammon. Will tolerate him though. Will quote musicals and sometimes Shakespeare to casually insult him. Will only lash out if he says something that might hurt someone, as a reminder that maybe he shouldn’t be so tough on those around him. 

Mammon: Love interest (ignore this if you don’t like OCs shipped with canon characters). Bonded after she first came home with Levi, she saw how, despite being talked down to by his brothers, he kept supporting them no matter what insults they threw at him. Very supportive of him and comforts him whenever she can.

Levi: Best friend (one of), was the first of the brothers she met, thinks he's funny and likes it when he starts rambling about things he likes, joins in at times, wants to help him with his insecurities.

Satan: Mutual respect for how much they both annoy Lucifer. Happy to talk about books and musicals with him. Tries to reassure him that he is not Lucifer 2.0

Asmo: Best friend (one of). Gossip, music and shopping buddies. Likes spending spa days together. Very supportive of her whenever she has a body image breakdown. Tries to calm her down when she's angry at Lucifer, but won't physically get in the way. 

Beel: Friends, he makes sure she has food if she's going through one of her body image episodes (was told by Mammon and Asmo), tries to comfort him when he's worried about what's happening between his brothers. Will frequently bake things for him and his brothers.

Belphie: Like Satan, mutual respect for how much they annoy Lucifer. Happy to lie about and just chill with him.

MC: Mother figure. Very protective of them and will defend them from anyone who wishes them harm, including the brothers. Makes sure they're alright as much as she can. Has a pact with them so they can call her whenever they need her.

Diavolo: Respects him. Understands he has a lot going on so will give help when asked, but most of the time will leave him be. Very grateful towards him due to him helping her get settled in the Devildom when she arrived after her death.

Barbatos: A little afraid of him because of his time related abilities. Tries to keep on his good side as much as she can.

Simeon: A bit of a fan, since he's the author of TSL, one of her favourite series. Holds him in very high regards, very happy to talk with him. Has offered to collaborate with him if he needs music for future films/episodes.

Luke: Considers herself a bit of a mother figure to him. Looks after him when he's upset, happy to bake with him as much as he wants.

Solomon: A little skeptical of him, considering the 72 pacts he has with demons and his magical ability. One of the few people she struggles to read.

Astro*: Best friend (one of). Will team up with her to stand up to Lucifer. Protective of one another, will gladly cause chaos together.

Hiris**: Best friend (one of). A little jealous at times because she still has some family, but overall similar relationship as between Ru and Astro. Will gladly try to satisfy her curiosity and listens to her stories a lot.

Role: Student, vocalist and musician at multiple clubs

Family: None, doesn’t know what happened to her human parents or siblings after she died, barely remembers them at all.

Extra facts:

Will use her water magic both to help herself and others to calm down after a bad day and also to trap anyone she wants to 'talk' to - will freeze their legs and shoes to the ground so they can't move (usually Lucifer or people who decide to verbally or physically attack one of her friends)

Will buy Mammon or Levi something from Akuzon without them knowing whenever they've had a bad day to cheer them up

Will cause water based inconveniences targeted at Lucifer if she wants a more subtle way of annoying him after he's given someone (usually Mammon) a too severe punishment - e.g. burst pipe in his bathroom, frozen drink when he's starting to overstep his boundaries (even when she's not in the room, has a codeword with Mammon for him to send to her if he ever feels like Lucifer is talking down to him too much), bucket of water is accidentally knocked over and it spills on him, water goes cold when he's having a shower and will not reheat (Lucifer knows its her but has no way to prove it as she's never actually seen doing it unless she wants to be seen, only MC, Hiris and Astro know that Ru has the HOL pipe system memorized so she knows which pipe goes to which room)

Most presents she gives that haven't been bought on Akuzon are either made with her water magic or tickets to concerts she has managed to get through a few connections (the latter is usually for Levi)

Can and will come up with the most creative insults she can

Is an ace at rhythm games

Has sung duets with Asmo/accompanied Asmo on several instruments 

Hates horror movies 

Always carries two flasks: one of water so she always has access to something to use for her powers, and one of pineapple juice to help soothe her throat. 

Has let Asmo style her several times for concerts - including the time with the suit and corset.

Loves swimming

Is bisexual

Ship facts (please disregard this if you don’t like OCs shipped with canon characters):

Often persuades Mammon to do shows/concerts with her as a way to make him feel better and to get back at his brothers

Mammon has persuaded her to do multiple modelling sessions with him.

Also uses the concerts she knows Mammon will be watching as a way to flirt with him - has worn a suit and corset with heeled boots to do this before.

Has kissed Mammon on stage multiple times.

Has Mammon saved as MonMon on her DDD 

*Astro belongs to one of my friends (will update if I find them on Tumblr)

**Hiris belongs to @storypanda88

[rebelpuff]

Hi, same anon as before, how does Buttercup feel about Ms. Bellum?

Generally, very positively.

She and her sisters will refuse to tell the Professor that he was ever not enough, and she'll die defending him to her last breath, but it was so important to them to have a positive female role model as they grew. She was part of the reason that when AWSM tried to deny the girls membership, they didn't back down. She's part of the reason Blossom wasn't afraid to take charge and Bubbles wasn't afraid to be soft and Buttercup wasn't afraid to stand up for herself.

Yes, they all know that, when it comes down to the nitty gritty, Sara Bellum is the one in charge. She's the one who makes sure funds go where they need to go; she's the one who writes legislation and passes it into law; she's the one that does the Mayor's campaigning. She is the mayor of Townsville; she has all the not-fun parts of being in charge. The Mayor gets the money and the name and the fun, but at the end of the day, no one really respects him. The girls eventually grow to understand that the Mayor is more malicious than he outwardly seems, but they don't actively think of him as dangerous. He's just a gross perverted old man.

Bellum is the one with the power. Bellum is the one to fear. She literally beat the shit out of Sedusa bare handed, and Sedusa is a succubus. Bellum's just human.

She is smart, caring, and badass all in one. She was the one who stood up for the girls when no one else would, and Buttercup genuinely admires her for that, for being a voice to the voiceless. She admires her for taking an interest in three girls who were in no way related to her, and stepping in as a parental figure when needed, even though she was never asked. Buttercup loves spending time with her, too. (Once a year, Bellum and the girls have a karaoke night that ends up on YouTube every time, and they have so much fun.)

Bellum is the closest thing the girls have ever had to a mother, and although Buttercup will never admit it, that means the world to her. She refuses to say or hear a bad word about Ms. Bellum, just like she refuses to entertain anything negative about the Professor.

Even though, at the end of the day, Buttercup knows that if it came down to it, she'd kill them both to protect her sisters.

Because at the end of the day, Bellum can be controlled and manipulated just like any other human can. Just like her father was, the several times he tried to kill his daughters. And Ms. Bellum is a complicated character, more so than we might want to believe. She is overqualified for an assistant job, but she took it regardless; she refuses to allow the Mayor's sexualization of her change who she is and how she dresses, and she uses his shit to her advantage; she is a peaceful woman, but a talented fighter; she loves the girls, but still overworks them in the name of the public good.

Anyway, long story short, Buttercup loves Sara as best as she knows how, with her constant distrust of everything and everyone.

Someone write Sara Bellum.

[okay-victoria]

Status of Women in The Empire

Summary: LN gives some evidence women have a better status than they did in OTL Germany. It gives little to nothing in the way of evidence that we are in post-sexual-revolution territory. It presents little enough evidence generally that you can use this issue in your own story as you wish; however, using how humans actually work as your baseline, it would be a very definite handwave to think that gender equality is much more than marginally better than OTL would have been at the time, or that Tanya wouldn’t be negatively affected by it in some significant ways in daily life. On the other hand, the original story handwaves an eight year old enrolling in a modern military and getting promoted to a mid-ranking officer by age eleven, so as a reader, I’m obviously pretty down for handwaving some realism for the sake of a good story.

Evidence:

V1/C1

“The armed forces have a practical exception in place for just about everything.” <= I think in fanon the entire Empire as seen as this sort of “everything we do is logical” territory where gender discrimination would have had to be eliminated, but in reality it’s presented as the military, and they are making an exception for a rare and incredibly militarily useful type of person to be able to be put to use by them without gender discrimination stopping it.

V1/C4

“But in the far-from-gender-free world of “ladies first,” Tanya with her outwardly girlish appearance is, albeit only relatively, blessed compared to the other students” <= YMMV, but I would not describe modern society as a world of “ladies first”. Do people do/say it to hark back to pre-1960s chivalry? Sure. Is it really the standard we live by anymore? Not so much. Tanya seems to pretty definitely still be living in those days.

“Basically, apart from the mage branch, the army is a man’s world. Actually, even most of the mages are men.” <= this is notable because it is said when Tanya is in War College, at which point the war has been going on for long enough that available mages have been conscripted, so there is no selection bias that men have simply chosen to pursue a career as a mage more often than women. This is actually weirdly important because it either means:

Magic talent is like, an X chromosome trait and men are thus more likely to have it [in which case, it would probably be taken as natural evidence that men are superior and worsen the gender equality situation]; or

There in fact is a Youjo Konki-esque exception for married women and/or mothers. A nation has to still be relatively in the infancy of gender equality if Female Mage #102 has children with Infantryman #1,000,102 and the military decides that since it can’t leave these children parentless, it has to conscript the dude who is substitutable for literally anyone else and not the human weapon.

Tanya has a long-ish reflection on women in the military. Important points are, the rules have only been overhauled recently to make it practical for women to serve in combat. Women in combat didn’t really exist prior to this war, and women in the military were basically limited to noble/imperial families having their daughters serve out nominal duties. Whatever boost women as a whole get from serving in a capacity that people are used to seeing men in, it has not had time to transform society all that much.

V2/C2

“Women administrators are not uncommon, but in the Empire where gender equality still has a ways to go, their qualifications are always questioned.” <= YMMV as to what degree this is meant to be a statement on something that still troubles women in modern times, or something that indicates gender equality is not particularly close to modern.

V2/C5

“After all, now that I’ve been turned into a girl, I’m faced with this annoying military framework where men are superior. Just the thought of my promotions being blocked by an invisible glass ceiling is enough to dampen any desire I might have to act all girlish for propaganda…apart from that, the Empire’s personnel system has adapted extremely meritocratic principles for the war, in a way, so I’m more or less satisfied with it.” <= sort of same as above, YMMV on whether this is just Tanya realizing what life is like for a woman in modern society or meant as a “no, it was worse” point.

However, I will say this: I highly, highly doubt any men chosen for high military honors were photographed doing anything other than looking ultra manly in uniform. Women serving in modern militaries are not forced to put on showy dresses when they get their photos taken, they are treated, at least in photos, with the same respect as their male colleagues. The fact that anyone found it appropriate to only photograph the recipient of the highest military honor in cute girl clothes speaks to some deep discomfort with anyone outside the military seeing women not doing what they’re supposed to.

V6/C6

“The Imperial Army has already tapped all the population pools that can be mobilized, but it still has two options. One is to begin the general conscription of women. That said, they’ve already been mobilized in the industrial sector.” <= YMMV, again, on how willing a modern country would be to conscript women to fight a world war, but if you are as deep into a world war as the Empire is and no one’s trying it, at the least we can say the Empire is not the bastion of cold logic it fanonically is outside the military. Also, it pretty much seems like women working in large numbers has only become a thing because all the guys are off fighting, which very much sticks us in pre-1950s territory.

V8/C1

Andrew reacts surprised to see a female reporter from the Federation, and reflects that they are quite liberal in some ways <= while this is a non-Imperial guy, given his familiarity with the Empire, it would seem weird that if the Empire was particularly more advanced than his country that he would still be so surprised.

Other Working Knowledge Your Author Has On This Subject:

Women serving in the military, while certainly helpful to the cause of gender equality, by itself is not going to create a broad-based transformation in society. That sounds a bit like saying: As we all know, the US dropped any racist laws or regulations as soon as we started allowing non-white units in the military. After Elizabeth I serving as the Ruler of England, a very manly role that her tiny woman-brain didn’t fuck up too bad, the people who thought women were naturally stupider than men were quickly relegated to the margins and gender discrimination mostly became more of an annoyance than a real hindrance to the average woman’s goals. It just doesn’t work that way. And I’m not here to say that the US is a post-gender paradise, but the US, which has never had a woman president and is pretty slow about expanding military opportunities for women, nonetheless is a lot better on the gender equality front than some countries that have had women leaders and allow women a fuller range of military opportunities. There’s a lot more complexity to it than: My country respects military => military allows women => guess I’m going to stop being sexist

The same goes for something that isn’t about gender equality at large but how it relates to Tanya: The view that while gender equality may be non-advanced, Tanya specifically is exempt from dealing with it because she is “one of the boys”. It Does Not Work Like That. At All. And the further you go back in time, the less it worked like that. Within the military specifically Tanya will probably be alright, but society at large punishes men & women that break gender roles as brazenly as she does more than it rewards them. This is an entire essay unto itself, Google is your friend.

This is going to sound silly and facetious but I’m being dead serious, from what little we know of fashion in the YS world, it matches what would have been the case in the real world in the WW1 era. If society at large was really that different, that wouldn’t be the case.

There is no canon evidence that magic has made any scientific advancements outside the military sphere of influence. Before the advent of things like dishwashers, vacuums, microwaves, especially refrigerators, and especially laundry machines being common household items, the ideal family model was: one person makes money outside home, one person takes care of house. There wasn’t enough time in the day to work and run a household. Many women in poor households had to work, generally at the expense of being able to keep their own household running smoothly, and even then they often worked in capacities that allowed them to be at home or ones that allowed them the flexibility to take care of some of this stuff. It really just isn’t possible to have a society remotely approaching equality when one gender is automatically assigned to home unless necessary.

Same goes for something else - contraception. Women having access to a contraceptive device that they control is a major component of setting a society on a path towards equality. Birth control pills didn’t become widely available until the 1960s. Without being unable to at least kind of balance the outcome of sex (even between married couples) between men and women, women as a class have a hard time escaping from the housewife-mother archetype.

Not to get too political here, but the Empire matches OTL Germanic-Prussianness too much to ignore. Living under a military-worshipping, religiously-inclined traditional monarchy has not, in any real life example I’m aware of, gone hand-in-hand with anything other than a fairly conservative and patriarchal society, and I feel like the burden of proof is on the other side to explain why that isn’t the case in the Empire, and our original author makes approximately zero effort to do this.

Being X turns Tanya into a woman for the purpose of making her life worse. It seems simply illogical [although I guess Being X’s decision-making skills are questionable] that he would then drop her into a world that had undergone broad-based gender reform instead of a world that was just barely tweaked from our own in such a way that it would allow Tanya to serve in the military.

My conclusion: the most likely option is that gender equality is exactly enough better as it needs to be to allow the military to convince the lawmakers that they should be able to use a very rare & dangerous ability to be part of their arsenal without respect to gender, or age, and no more. That difference is not likely to make life for women significantly better than it was in the equivalent OTL time period.

[thecomposerofstories]

Disney Does NOT Know how to Feminist, for the Most Part.

I like Moana and Judy Hopps, they’re pretty good relatively-new female Disney characters, but the rest, I don’t like. It’s all, “I’m a woman, I have to save you scum-bag men because you can’t do A N Y T H I N G, hear me roar, society is trash, watch me twirl a stick.” And believe me that trope is getting kinda old kinda quickly.

People think Disney Princesses are nothing more than Damsels in Distress, and I don’t know where tf that rumour came from but I don’t like it.

Snow White gets some of the worst rap for it, and that’s not fair. I think she’s got more courage than Bo Peep and Mulan (2020, the 1998 version is an amazing role model for kids in my opinion, the 2020 version is a bitch) put together.

Snow White had to be a slave to the Evil Queen, who made her dress in rags and clean non-stop. And she still manages to go through all of that “With a Smile and a Song”.

And when she thinks her Step Mother is being kind to her, letting her wear a clean dress and letting her pick flowers and be free from chores for at least just an hour, but it turns out that she had been tricked, and that the Huntsman was supposed to kill her. But because of her kindness, the Huntsman couldn’t bring himself to kill her.

So Snow ran away, scared, and with good reason to be. The Queen will have her guts pulled out if she ever saw her again. Yet when Snow is in the forest with the woodland creatures, she apologizes for crying and asks to start over, to re-introduce herself. That’s brave, if you ask me. and she didn’t have to wear pants or wield a stick either. People forget that there are two kinds of bravery, physical fighting, (Like all female characters seem to do these days) and mental fighting, smiling even though your cared out of your mind. Keeping your head high when things are dreary, finding the good in a sea of bad.

As a girl, I’m tired of all this talk that a girl can’t wear a dress and be a bad-ass. Bo, to me, was a good character because she balanced out the other female characters, there was variety. Bo was sweet natured and girly, yes, but she was also wise and insightful and had way more depth than the new Bo. Alright, time to turn this conversation onto Toy Story 4, because I’m mad at it.

When people say, “Oh I can’t believe Woody left with Bo! What a bad decision!” they don’t say that like he never met her, they say it because Bo’s an arsehole. Woody left his family, and though we could argue that Bo is family, too, she isn’t a very nice part. she called Woody an accessory, acted rather rude towards him, and abandoned him twice because he was doing the right thing, yet she makes him apologize for it.  Like girl you dumped him and left him in your cardboard box and your acting like Woody ate your last jelly bean. What did he do to deserve being treated so harshly? I don’t get it. since when is it illegal to show affection towards someone you love?

The way I see it, Feminism in Disney is just taking female characters and making them a Gaston. Y’know, very butch, very masculine, the favorite of the town and everyone loves him because, well, he’s the town’s favorite son. Taking a girl and stripping her of her femininity and replacing it with a stick.

Honestly, I’m not even mad. I just wish they did more with Bo. I have this Toy Story 4 Concept Art Book, and it was just filled with better iteration's of what she could’ve been, and it’s disappointing. I mean in one drawing she had a pencil for a leg and a missing eye and to me that’s a big missed opportunity. Instead they went with just a blue jumpsuit. Yet everyone made crazy versions of what she should look like, and then they went for the boringest decision.

And on one full page, it’s just about what Bo’s hands should look in front of her cape, and other crazy things. Like who even cares? I’d rather have a compelling character with a slight wardrobe malfunction than what we got any day.

It just makes me sad what they did to a good character like Bo. I like that she was girly, I liked that she was flirty, since when are those aspects in a woman bad? I don’t even care what her outfit looks like. Wearing pants doesn’t mean you ‘Wear the pants’, and wearing a skirt doesn’t make you inferior, literally regardless of gender.

Let. Girls. Be. Girls. And that doesn’t just mean being ‘girly’, it can mean anything. Being a girl is whatever you want it to be. Being you, whoever you are, girl, boy, both, or neither, is whoever you want to be. Just as long as you aren’t hurting anyone, anyway.

And not all men are scumbags. Most of my friends are dudes, and they’re coolest dudes I’ve ever met. And not all girls like to swing sticks and wear pants, Y’know. Not all girls are rebellious and smack-talking and bossy.

I also hate what they did to Dolly and Trixie. Dolly was spunky and cute, but now she’s just down-right psychotic. Like she legit tried to murder Forky in Forky asks a Question just because he was verbal-stimming. 

And Trixie’s no better. She yells at Forky for something he didn’t even do on purpose. He accidentally broke her laptop, but like the poor guy didn’t even mean to. And the laptop isn’t even hers it’s not like she paid for it, she shouldn’t even be angry.

Not gonna lie, if someone broke my laptop I’d be pissed, but I certainly wouldn’t act the way Trixie did.

Give characters a variety of personalities. Don’t make any gender inferior. And stop making I out like all men are trash, please.

I don’t even mind strong female characters, I love them, I love seeing fan-arts of Bo on here, and I don’t give a crap that others like her, it’s none of my business what characters they like. I just wish we had more variety, though. Less brawn, more brains. Less bossy, more kind. Less screaming “You won’t listen to me! I’m always right!”, and more listening to others opinions.

And give them obstacles, too. Just because a character is female doesn’t mean you can’t give them something to make them grow. People want to see a character strive for greatness, no matter what. Not just whack ‘em with a stick and be done with it, we want the character to change throughout the story, regardless of gender. A story just about a character effortlessly kicking ass, and never coming to harm or learning anything isn’t very entertaining, nor does it tech the kids watching anything. Especially when kids are the age were they copy everything they see on television.

I just hope Disney figures that out in time.

[whimsyverse]

Family #1: The Dolans

(this is a re-upload as I made some major changes to my mod situation, specifically the CC traits I'm using...nearly all of the traits from here on out will be from Chingyu's trait pack, just for simplicity's sake)

After a long delay of straightening out my many (many, many) mods and just generally fighting with my lack of motivation to do...things...I've finally placed my first family: the Dolans! Pictures above (left to right) are: Vincent, Donovan, Lucinda, and Lillian.

You may recognize Vincent, at least, from my first Whimsyverse project...that'll be an ongoing theme, of course, since I'm remaking all of these characters again. This time, though, instead of making them all adults, I'll be defaulting most of my major characters to teenagers for no real specific reason besides that it feels like I'm starting at the beginning of their stories. Also it's more work for me to make all of their families and I

am nothing if not a masochist...

Family Bio: Donovan Dolan is a dangerous and brilliant criminal for hire, performing everything from high-profile heists to hitman-style assassinations dispassionately for the highest bidder. However, this was not the case when he first met Lillian, an aspiring model, and their whirlwind romance ended with them married and Lillian pregnant with twins. While establishing himself as one of the most dangerous men alive, the twins Vincent and Lillian were growing up with their gentle and loving mother, who all but gave up her own aspirations to raise them. Vincent and Lillian resent their absentee and dangerous father for how he neglects his family, and for his part, it is clear that Donovan expects at least one of them to continue in his footsteps...though which one has yet to be decided.

Vincent Dolan

Meta Bio: Vincent is my version of that character we all make around high school/early college - the hyper-competent badass that’s just there to be awesome and to let us write super cool scenes. He was super cool and good at everything and had a tragic backstory and was super emo and edgy and graargh! However, as I grew, Vincent stuck with me and became a character I reused many, many times over, and as I became more competent of a storyteller (I said more competent!), he grew too. He remained the hyper-competent badass he started as (a bit of self-indulgence on my part, perhaps), but the tragedy of his backstory and the psychology of him wrestling with his trauma became more pronounced in how I wrote him. He was no longer just a bad-ass, he was a more complex character who, despite appearing to be unaffected by everything around him, was really hyper-repressed to a dangerous degree. I started writing him less as that hyper-competent Gary Stu and more as a normal man (or boy) who simply didn’t know how to express himself or process the trauma of his past - in which he watches his father kill his mother and threaten to kill his twin sister - without letting the pain that comes naturally to that trauma overwhelm him. So he simply shuts it all out. At the same time, he has drilled into his head (thanks, again, to his father) that he simply isn’t good enough. This no longer manifests as a sort of infantile, impotent angst, but rather a silent drive to always do better at everything he does - an intense focus that earned him the very fitting title “a model of intense apathy” from my friend. But one of the most fun parts of the character isn’t writing him being exceptional at everything (I actually enjoy emphasizing that he is not good at everything...anything that requires a modicum of creativity or personal expression is utterly beyond him), it’s watching him, with the help of people around him, discover the young man that he could have been. I recently wrote him smiling for the first time and it was very sweet.

Age: Teenager Gender: Cis Male Sexuality: Asexual Aspiration: Renaissance Sim Lifestyle: Energetic Walk Style: Tough Style: Basic

Degree: N/A Career: N/A Skills: Fitness (4); Logic (3)

Likes: Color Purple, Color Black Dislikes: Comedy; Mischief

Traits: Reserved; Alexithymia; Scary; Unfunny; Over-Achiever; Mentally Gifted; Shameless; Unique Appearance; Slower Romance Gain; Physically Gifted; Brave; Needs No One; Carefree; Heat Acclimation; Slower Friendship Gain; Seldom Sleepy; Cold Acclimation; Quick Learner

Donovan Dolan

Meta Bio: Donovan has never been especially well-defined, and as such, this will be a pretty short bio. He only ever really existed as a vessel to drive Vincent’s trauma. He’s gone from being a petty thug to a master criminal to a dangerous madman. But I tend to enjoy playing him more as a sort of mirror into what Vincent could become - a hyper-competent, dangerous psychopath - a term I use more or less literally here, to emphasize his utter lack of empathy/sympathy. Like many psychopaths, he appears, outwardly, to be extremely well-adjusted, even charming and charismatic, but without the ability to relate to others. He is highly focused on his job, whatever that may be at the time.

Age: Adult Gender: Cis Male Sexuality: Straight Aspiration: Fabulously Wealthy Lifestyle: Workaholic Walk Style: Tough Style: Basic

Career: Criminal (The Boss) Skills: Charisma (8); Fitness (8); Handiness (6); Logic (8); Mischief (10); Persuasion (4); Rock Climbing (5); Skiing (5)

Likes: Retro Music; Fitness; Rock Climbing; Dislikes: Video Games; Comedy; Backyard Music; Winter Holiday Music; New Age Music; Summer Strut Music; Tween Pop Music; Lullabies Radio Music

Traits: (*deep breath*) Abusive, Bad-Natured, Brilliant, Psychopath, Well-Balanced, Mentally Gifted, Argumentative, Emotional Control, Good Manners, Insensitive, Faster Relationship Gain, Physically Gifted, Socially Gifted, In the Know, Influential Individual, Mastermind, Natural Leader, Faster Friendship Gain, Over-Achiever, Connections, Brave, Carefree, Fortune Sim, Cold Acclimation, Savant, Great Kisser, Entrepreneurial, Shameless, Needs No One, Heat Acclimation, Hardly Hungry, Business Savvy, Alluring, Career-Minded, Dastardly, High Metabolism,

Lucinda Dolan

Meta Bio: Lucinda is even less defined than Donovan, usually. Once again, she exists simply to die and provide fuel for Vincent’s tragedy. She is usually described as being exceptionally kind and gentle, the opposite of her husband, and having made a strong impression on Vincent and Lillian during their childhoods. For the Sims version, I liked to imagine her as being full of life and energy and happiness. She leans a bit more into creative endeavors, which neither of her children took after. She still lives for her children, though, and the decision to give up her dreams as a model was her own...she wanted to be a parent more than she wanted anything else.

Age: Adult Gender: Cis Female Sexuality: Bisexual Aspiration: Super Parent Lifestyle: Close-Knit Walk Style: Feminine Style: Basic

Degree: Drama Career: N/A Skills: Acting (3); Charisma (4); Comedy (2); Dancing (4); Fitness (2); Painting (2); Parenting (6); Piano (4); Singing (5); Wellness (2)

Likes: Alternative Music; Singer Songwriter Music; Pop Music; Easy Listening Music; Americana Music; Color Black; Color Purple; Dancing; Painting; Piano; Singing Dislikes: Baking; Cooking; Mischief

Traits: Emotional; High-Spirited; Tender; Light-Hearted; Family Oriented; Role Model; Mediator; Kindness Ambassador; Responsible; Beloved; Incredibly Friendly; Good Manners; Emotional Control; Compassionate; Family Sim; Domestic; Gregarious

Lillian Dolan

Meta Bio: Unsurprisingly, Lillian, like her parents, has never been extremely well-defined, but I have had her appear occasionally in stories - I just never really cemented what kind of character she was. In the past, she was the polar opposite of Vincent: energetic, cheerful, impetuous. Other times she took more after their mother and was more quietly calm and confident. In this case, I decided to make her sort of a high-strung workaholic who doesn’t really know how to relate to people, mostly because that’s how she was in one of her more recent appearances. So hey, maybe that’s now her canon personality!

Age: Teenager Gender: Cis Female Sexuality: Bisexual Aspiration: Figuring it Out Lifestyle: Coffee Fanatic; Workaholic Walk Style: Normal Style: Preppy

Degree: N/A Career: Lifeguard Skills: Logic (4); Persuasion (2); Research and Debate (5); Rock Climbing (2); Writing (3)

Likes: Wellness; Research and Debate; Rock Climbing; Fitness; Writing; Color Black; Color Purple Dislikes: Video Gaming; Comedy; Mischief; Cooking; Baking; Dancing; Color Pink

Traits: Serious; Generalized Anxiety Disorder; Smart; Avoidant; Knowledge Sim; Top Notch Toddler; Physically Gifted; Mentally Gifted; Over-Achiever; Seldom Sleepy; Speed Reader; Independent; Learning about Life; Career-Minded; Quick Learner

[hellklein]

[ HELENA KLEIN. 29. FEMALE. SHE/HER] is here! They’ve lived in Silver Lake for [ 10 YEARS ] and are originally from [ NEW YORK ]. They are an [ ASPIRING ACTRESS / CLERK AT FUNKYTOWN THRIFT ] and in their downtime love [ ROLLERSKATING ] and [ COLLECTING VINYL ]. They look a lot like [ TESSA THOMPSON ] and live [ IN OASIS APTS ]

LINKS

stats

wanted connections

musings

playlist

ABOUT HELENA

sexuality:

bisexual

astrology:

leo ☀, taurus ☾, virgo ↑

traits:

charismatic, down to earth, insecure, old-soul, nurturing, hard-headed, sensitive, persistent, strong, jealous, mature, fun spirited, passionate, idealistic

aesthetic:

roller-skates, old vinyls, disco balls, funky fashion, hollywood dreams, pink lemonade, responsibly irresponsible, vintage taste, dreams before day jobs, messy hair, dead devotion, bruised legs, starry eyes

BIOGRAPHY

[ tw: death mention ]

born & raised in nyc, helena trinity klein grew up as an only child with her two loving parents. her mother was a botanist and her father was an astronomer - two scientists with brilliant minds. her father always called helena his “little star”

helena had a close relationship with her grandmother who was once a popular lounge singer and actress back in the day in nyc. the woman shared music, musicals, and classic films with helena throughout her life. helena would dress up and perform scenes with her grandmother, causing a passion and obsession to begin.

helena took her father’s nickname a little too literally, because it didn’t take long for her to realize she wanted nothing more than to be a star. helena’s parents were supportive of her endeavors, but only because they assumed it was a phase.

it was clear from a very young age that helena was quite brilliant just like her parents, and it had always been expected she’d become a scientist as well. helena even attended a technical high school dedicated to science for a year until she convinced her parents to transfer her back to her regular high school where her friends were.

in high school, helena performed in every musical produced by the theater program and often landed prominent roles. she possessed her grandmother’s singing voice and the acting chops to match. she surrounded herself with like-minded people - all those who loved the arts. her best friend was an outstanding dancer, and together, they had big dreams.

helena often bonded with her father over older music. she later discovered that he once had a dream of being a musician like his mother, but never chased that dream due to his fear. it was that day she realized she could no longer pretend to her parents that she wanted to be a scientist. she wanted to be an actor, no matter how terrifying or foolish that was.

although there was clear disappointment from both of her parents, they didn’t stand in her way of chasing her dreams. all she ever wanted was for them to believe in her, though that seems unlikely even to this day. it often made her feel so small, especially when her own parents seemed to support her best friend’s dream of being a dancer more than their daughter’s own dreams. helena knew she wouldn’t be able to get the life she wanted in nyc, so she set sails for the west.

helena went to college at UCLA and lived with her cousin who lived in the area. helena promised to do her parents one last favor - get a degree in physics as a backup plan if the acting career never comes through. although she felt pressured to do it, she did it on their behalf and never once spoke about how awful it felt that her parents already envisioned her failing. she could tell they were coming from a good place, and so with that, she went to school for physics while doing everything she could to get her name out there.

modeling, acting in commercials, student films, and more. she did everything she could in college to work towards a career in acting.

when she wasn’t busting her ass between auditions and science projects, helena spent time with friends trying her best to have a life out there in california. she had ways of dealing with all her stress - going out with friends, listening to music,  roller skating, and eventually even roller derby. skating had been something she’d done her whole life. being good on wheels even allowed her to be in a handful of music videos as a roller girl.

her grandmother passed away while she was in school, and the death came with a great toll on helena. she was heartbroken, because in her eyes, her only true supporter of her dreams were gone. that woman was the reason she lived and breathed the things she did. helena owed her everything, and she owed her everything to never give up.

once she graduated from school, helena didn’t stop chasing her dream of being an actor. she moved in the silver lake area with her friend from college, valentina, and got a job at a thrift store she always frequented heavily.

other than a handful of small guest appearances on tv shows, background extras, and a few viral tik toks with her roommate - she didn’t quite become the star she envisioned becoming. now on the brink of her thirties, she’s beginning to wonder if it’s time to hang up the acting hat. but for now, she pushes on and continues to go to audition after audition even when their answers are always no.

HEADCANONS

helena is seriously way too good at roller skating and you can catch her always skating to work. she’ll even skate around the store when her manager lets her.

she's on a roller derby team and has been on and off for years now since college. her derby name is 'helen de-stroy', a play on words of helen of troy.

she likes to stay active - when she’s not roller skating, she’s boxinng/kickboxing, doing yoga, and hiking.

though she loves to have fun and go out, helena is perpetually the responsible ‘mom’ friend of the group. she’s the one making sure you drink water and holding your hair back when you puke at the end of the night.

she’s been in only one serious relationship. she goes on the occasional date, but she’s all about having a meaningful connection with people.

helena collects vinyls and plays a lot of them while she’s working.

she’s very into fashion, though her looks have been deemed funky and thrifty. she likes bolds colors, chunky jewelry, you name it.

to be added ....

[julietsfm]

— only five minutes ‘til midnight , and we just spotted JULIET ROBINSON , known for SITTING IN THE BACK OF A CROWDED ROOM , STEALING GLANCES ACROSS THE TABLE , and THE SOUND OF ACRYLIC NAILS TAPPING AGAINST A HARD SURFACE , at club nouveau , ringing in the new year ! the TWENTY-TWO year old is usually known for their job as a M O D E L , but tonight , they’re just another reveler in the crowd . when they wrote down their new year’s resolution , they wished for THE OPPORTUNITY TO TAKE A BREAK & A LOW-KEY VACATION WITH HER CLOSEST FRIENDS . funny enough , they had also mentioned how they hoped to forget about the time that they REDACTED . for what it’s worth , i truly hope they can put the old year past them . [ zendaya , cis female , SUPERMODEL JULIET ROBINSON CAUGHT SNEAKING OUT OF PARTY WITH MYSTERY BEAU ]

BIOGRAPHY:

JULIET BEATRICE ROBINSON. born in the heart of austin, texas to rudolph and katherine robinson. she was born into your run of the mill middle class family, but it didn't take long for her family to strike oil. literally. just a year after her birth, her parents were hired as lawyers for two very large energy corporations respectively. handling all the big wig stuff was no walk in the park, especially as time went on and the world began to call for different types of energy. if there was one thing the robinsons were not, it was QUITTERS. it didn't take much time for them to find new clients- more famous clients. switching from company law to personal law didn't phase either of the adults much. in fact, this proved to be their strength. they made the switch in '07, the year juliet turned nine. it was then they packed their bags and headed to new york in search of better opportunities.

new york is where juliet has most of her memories. she hardly remembers life in texas and has only known a life of wealth. it's the type of life everybody dreams of. however, juliet always found it hard. she had no expectations to meet, but also impossible expectations to meet. she could slack off academically if she wanted to, but she couldn't be caught publicly doing things most teens would do when slacking off in school. everything she did was a reflection of her parents, and moving to new york made that very apparent. in texas, it was hard to find people who cared outside of your social circle. new york is a very different environment and juliet has had trouble adjusting. she was there just six years before being pulled from her expensive private school and switching to the homeschool / tutor life.

her parents (and those around them) found beauty in her that she had yet to see in herself. if you had asked juliet, she was just the product of two averagely beautiful people. however, those around her seemed to see much more. through her parents connections, she met with modeling companies and began working on her portfolio. if anyone was going to take her seriously, she was going to need more than just a pretty face. at least, that's what they had told her. luckily, she had been in ballet all throughout her youth, so she already had the grace and gentleness that one expected from a model. she wasn't self-conscious, but she still couldn't see what everyone else saw in her. she spent many hours looking in the mirror just searching for SOMETHING extraordinary about her.

in juliet's eyes, she was not extraordinary. it was her parents that were larger than life. they had turned nothing into everything and she was just lucky to be the one to come out of her mother that one march morning in '98. because she was that girl, she was expected to follow these even more intensive rules. watch what you eat, make sure you're keeping in shape, be careful who you spend time with, et cetera. it was very stressful and she couldn't stand it. she never asked for or wanted any of this. ever since she was born, she has been following a path set by her parents. she understands how blessed she is to have money, a platform, and a promising career in front of her. but she doesn't want it anymore. not that she's told her parents this. she wants to, but she knows she owes everything she has to them. her friendships, her career, her connections... it never ends. as much as she loves her friends and her life, she feels like a fish out of water. it's hard for her to explain, but she definitely has that feeling of impostor syndrome. no matter how many years she spent in new york or as a model, she sees everyone else and thinks they're all happy with their lives. they seem fulfilled and she wonders why she isn't. it just doesn't make sense why she can't just feel the same way as her friends. they're living the life everyone else only dreams of- why can't she be content with that?

because it means having to tell her parents that something isn't right. not once has she ever stood up to them. not for fear of having her savings taken away (not that it matters anymore, seeing how she has her successful modelig career) but for fear of telling them they've made her unhappy. also, talking feelings with two big-shot lawyers sounds like a nightmare. they rely on facts and are very straight to the point. they can be intimidating when they want to be, moreso when they don't even mean to be.

which is why she so desperately wishes to seek other opportunities. even though more and more celebrities are finding their way back to university, her parents seem against the idea for some reason. she's been eyeing other talents such as singing or acting, but her parents have told her "WE DON'T KNOW IF YOU WILL SUCCEED IN THAT FIELD. WHY RUIN A GOOD THING? YOU'RE ONLY GOING TO HAVE THIS PRETTY FACE FOR SO LONG, WHY NOT CAPITALIZE OFF OF IT WHEN YOU CAN?" so, for now, that's exactly what she'll do.

TOO LONG; DIDN’T READ:

born in texas

pisces

parents are lawyers for big name clients

moved to new york at age 9

model but yearning for more

wants to try out music / acting but is too scared to branch out

terrified of her parents and refuses to confront them

getting less secure in her role their version of society

continues to stay her best possible self for the media just to please her parents

attends events but learns to stay under the radar

very susceptible to peer pressure LMFAO

HERE IS A SOCIAL MEDIA PAGE I MADE!!!!!!!!!!!! please look at it it took me literal hours 

if u have any more questions for me just lmk <3

WANTED CONNECTIONS:

confidant

first friend in nyc ! or any childhood friends tbh <3

maybe any other friends who moved to new york in their tweens/teens??? kinda new in town?????? trying to figure it out together?????

any actor / actress / musician friends so juliet can be obsessed w their passion for their craft n their skill level ?

frenemies ? maybe they pretend to be friends for social media but don’t like each other or are overall indifferent to each other ??????

exes?????? fwb???????? one night stands???????? she likes everyone so we can make this work with whomstever if anyone is interested <3

[calvinmaxfield]

( booboo stewart. twenty-four. he/him. ) i think i just saw CALVIN MAXFIELD ride by on a golf cart . at least i think it was them . after all , STRAIGHT TO HELL BY THE CLASH was blasting on the transistor radio . maybe they were on their way to work , i hear they’re a LINE COOK . but they totally could have been on their way to STEAL SHOOTERS FROM THE BEVERAGE CART . guess we’ll never know . you’ll definitely know its them when you see PATCHES ON A WORN JEAN JACKET , CIGARETTES FORGOTTEN IN THE WASHING MACHINE , & AN UNUSED MUSICAL THEATRE DEGREE around the country club . let’s just hope they stay off the green after hours or else they sprinklers will get them ! ( haley. twenty-two. est. she/her. )

𝑓𝑢𝑙𝑙 𝑛𝑎𝑚𝑒 :  calvin antonio maxfield  .  𝑛𝑖𝑐𝑘𝑛𝑎𝑚𝑒(𝑠) :  cal , maxxie .  𝑎𝑔𝑒 :  twenty - five  .  𝑑𝑎𝑡𝑒  𝑜𝑓  𝑏𝑖𝑟𝑡ℎ :  march 4th , 1996 .  𝑏𝑖𝑟𝑡ℎ  𝑐ℎ𝑎𝑟𝑡 :  pisces  sun  ,  virgo  moon  ,  capricorn  rising  .  ℎ𝑜𝑚𝑒𝑡𝑜𝑤𝑛 :  north caldwell  ,  new jersey  .  𝑠𝑒𝑥𝑢𝑎𝑙  𝑜𝑟𝑖𝑒𝑛𝑡𝑎𝑡𝑖𝑜𝑛 :  bisexual  .  𝑜𝑐𝑐𝑢𝑝𝑎𝑡𝑖𝑜𝑛 :  line cook begrudgingly . has bigger aspirations for himself but settles for an easy job over one he has to work for . aspiring in everything film whether it be acting , screenwriting , direction or anything in between . has also entertained stand-up comedy but had never taken the steps towards achieving that goal either . 

ℎ𝑒𝑎𝑑 𝑐𝑎𝑛𝑛𝑜𝑛𝑠 : self proclaimed narcissist but is super self aware about his insecurities , is a whore lol , seems like he’d be the least judgmental person but is secretly super judgmental , will risk it all for a sexual connection possibly resulting in a romantic one , hasn’t cried in years , female manipulator music , thinks being called a theatre kid is a slur but was super well known for getting every lead role in high school and college , wants to be a stand up comedian or actor , could kill for a woman to braid his hair , will do anything for attention , noncommittal , the loudest person in a room but is insecure about his volume , the class clown , could be your friend for a lifetime and you still wouldn’t be sure if he likes you or not . 

𝑓𝑎𝑐𝑒𝑐𝑙𝑎𝑖𝑚 :  booboo stewart  .  ℎ𝑎𝑖𝑟 𝑐𝑜𝑙𝑜𝑟 :  black  .  𝑒𝑦𝑒 𝑐𝑜𝑙𝑜𝑟 :  brown  .  ℎ𝑒𝑖𝑔ℎ𝑡 :  5  ft  8 “  .  𝑡𝑎𝑡𝑡𝑜𝑜𝑠 :  to be determined but a littered , jumbled sleeve of meaningless drunk tattoos mostly .   𝑐𝑙𝑜𝑡ℎ𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑠𝑡𝑦𝑙𝑒 :  heavy punk rock . jean jackets plastered with patches , heavy boots , flannels tied at the waist line . heavy rings on slender fingers . a hair tie on each wrist . jeans or chef pants , no in between . fucks with an occasional open button down tee . 

𝑚𝑦𝑒𝑟 - 𝑏𝑟𝑖𝑔𝑔𝑠 𝑝𝑒𝑟𝑠𝑜𝑛𝑎𝑙𝑖𝑡𝑦 𝑡𝑦𝑝𝑒 :  the  debater  ,  entp  .   𝑚𝑜𝑟𝑎𝑙  𝑎𝑙𝑖𝑔𝑛𝑚𝑒𝑛𝑡  :  chaotic  good  .  𝑙𝑖𝑘𝑒𝑠 :  black cold brew with a cigarette , mindlessly rewatching taxi driver for comfort , quoting the sopranos , being right , comfortable silence , busy environments , making others smile .  𝑑𝑖𝑠𝑙𝑖𝑘𝑒𝑠 :  gossip , commitment , the transition from autumn to winter , cats , folding laundry , hungover anxiety.  

𝑏𝑎𝑐𝑘𝑔𝑟𝑜𝑢𝑛𝑑 : ( drug tw , child neglect tw ) . 

the class clown , the smart ass . these are just two of the labels that have been placed on calvin maxfield his whole life . he’s not even sure if he likes being called them , to know he’s being perceived by others is to know he’s truly alive . that he is seen . on one hand , he’d only ever wanted a disappearing act . one where he slips into the background with anyone truly noticing . a universe where he’s not putting on a face of clown make up to entertain . but on the other hand , he’s good at it . he’s good at entertaining and he likes seeing people smile . so why does calvin have so many qualms with being well liked ? it’s the expectations . an expectation to always be happy . no bad days , no turning off the constant sunshine smile . even if his mind is a storm far greater than he can conquer . 

there’s nothing more freudian than blaming your short comings on your childhood . at least that’s what calvin will tell you anyways . but deep down , he knows it’s a mask . that his childhood fucked him up more than he has even begun to process . his therapist pries but he pays her no mind , wishing to be considered more of a strong silent type than one who speaks with loose lips . but his tendencies to make others happy lie within his greatest coping mechanism with is humor . one he developed during his childhood watching movies far too mature for his underdeveloped mind . robert dinero , al pacino , so many tough men who taught him how to be strong in the face of adversities . movie stars were his role models because dad was always too high to entertain the thought of his son , shooting up the day’s dose in front of him while the bills piled high on the kitchen table . calvin’s mother wondered if she’d ever see a day where the world wasn’t so bleak , where she could protect her son from the horrors of the world . but she couldn’t even protect him from the one inside her very home . not to mention it was hard to supervise when working more jobs than seemed possible . 

but calvin grew up with thick skin and a cut throat attitude . he slept soundly knowing that his mother loved him and one day his father would see him succeed and kick himself in the ass for mistreating him . but calvin’s brilliance was never a revenge thing . he owed it to himself to be good at something . that something just so happened to be theatre . it was clear to the teachers that had maxxie the class clown sitting in their back row that he liked to perform so his drama teacher came an pursued him . at first hesitant , he remembered some of the greats . al , robert , and suddenly he was in . though he insisted on not being musically inclined , calvin quickly blossomed in the musicals and found his voice through his high school’s productions . he was finally receiving the validation he was deprived of his entire childhood . standing ovations , applause , genuine eye contact that came with compliments , loving hugs . he couldn’t get enough . so it only made sense that he pursued musical theatre in college . 

college was when things took a turn for the worst . a slacker , calvin could no long get away with thing solely because his teachers liked him and enjoyed his performances . now everyone was just like him . a talented class clown who thrived on applause and validation from others . bad habits crept their way into his life at this time seeing as he was drinking and experimenting with drugs pretty heavily . what was a career for everyone else was quickly turning into a hobby for him as his poor coping mechanisms and social life hopped in the driver’s seat . this life in his life was all about self sabotage . missing classes to drink , going to acting workshops hungover , sleeping with friend’s girlfriends , doing things just because he could . it was mind blowing that he ever received a degree . but with college coming to an end , he addressed that his period of time with substance abuse were some of the worst years of his life and he wanted to tone back . focus on himself . but old habits die hard . 

calvin doesn’t really know how he ended up in the highlands . maybe it was his lack of drive or washed up attitude , but it hard to give his life any real thought from behind the line in the kitchen. all he knows is he needs to get the fuck out . 

--------------

wanted connection:

ride or die ( f ) : ever since i created calvin as a muse i’ve wanted to him to have a girl best friend who literally completes him. calls him out on his bullshit , tell him when he’s being a dick but also helps him navigate through his life and feelings . bonus points if they’re a polar opposite of him like super feminine .

ex ( m/f/nb ) : calvin is toxic af so i’m down for plotting whatever honestly i just want him to have an ex 

fwb ( m/f/nb ) : again , calvin is a bisexual and toxic whore so bring him all your muses to casually fuck 

roommate ( m/f/nb )

coworkers 

enemies ?? frenemies ?? frenemies with benefits ???