#because of that I’m not going to edit this one

[verdantchan]

Always You

Pairing: Best friend! Bangchan x Afab! Reader

Summary: It’s hard to enjoy a party when your best friend who you’ve been in love with for years turns up with his girlfriend…

Warnings: MDNI, dom!chan, sub!reader, possessive!chan, unprotected sex (don’t be like them) dirty talk, cum eating, multiple orgasms (f!rec) fingering (f!rec) mentions of mastubation, spitting (chan spits on it yk..) tummy bulge, creampie

Wc: 2.7k

a/n: did I write and edit it this in one sitting? yes I did,,, is this also my return to writing fics after 5 years bc I’m so attracted to chan idk what to do?? Also yes 🤪

‘‘Lixieee watch my drink, I nearly dropped it’’ You roll your eyes and smile at Felix as he practically jumps on you. His parties were always rowdy, especially when Jisung wormed his way into the planning. Colourful lights strewn around every pillar and doorway, countless bottles and cheesy red cups littering the granite countertops in the dorm kitchen, the air thick with smoke and the sickly sweet scent of liquor.

Part of you loved how committed the boys were to throwing the most stereotypical frat parties, the perfect way to unwind from the stress of uni life. You scan the room for that all too familiar face but find no sign of him, your shoulders dropping slightly, the disappointment in your chest too strong to ignore.

You and Chan had been best friends since you were 12, your parents pushing you together as an unlikely duo. You'd immediately become inseparable,spending every second with each other. People had always questioned your relationship, everyone thought you must be dating if you were so close, but you and Chan were just friends, at least that's what you convinced yourself it had to be.

You first started having feelings for Chan at 18, you were university freshmen starting the next big chapter of your lives together and you couldn't get him out of your head. His deep brown eyes that sparkled when he spoke about the things he loved, his soft curly black hair that you loved ruffling to annoy him and his dimples that became impossibly deep when he smiled. Being around him was both torture and comfort. Three years later and you were still completely in love with someone who views you as his best friend, nothing more. In other words, you're utterly fucked.

‘’Lix, have you seen Chan tonight? I thought he was coming’’  Felix still clinging to you in his tipsy state. His messy blonde hair slightly covering his eyes and freckle-dotted cheeks, a pink blush dusting his skin thanks to the many drinks he’d already knocked back.

‘’Nah not yet, he said he's coming later after his date’’ he slurs his words a little, all giggly and happy, not knowing the ache his words cause you. You hum in response, suddenly feeling less sociable than a few minutes ago.

‘’Ahhhhh speak of the devil’’ Felix laughs and nods toward the doorway, Chan's broad shoulders making it look tiny. His hand interlocked with hers, observing the room and briefly locking eyes with you before looking away.

Chan had been dating Euna for a few months, but it never got easier seeing them together. 

They'd met in one of your classes, Euna was sweet, pretty  and very popular with both the students and teachers. It hadn’t taken Chan too long to fall for her and spend less and less time with you. He swore nothing had changed between you two but you knew better. It wasn't long after they started dating that Chan began cancelling your plans because ‘Euna planned something’ or he ‘just couldn't make it that day’ You wanted to believe that it would all go back to the way it was soon enough but that day never came, Chan drifting further as time passed. 

You missed his smile, the way he would make you laugh, the way he would bring you your favourite food when you were tired or upset. You thought that maybe one day you would be together, that Chan would see you as more than just his best friend. Sometimes it felt like more between you two. 

He and Euna weave their way through the crowd, her trailing slightly behind, Chan looking back at her every so often with a smile, the sight of them making you nauseous though you wish it didn't. Chan lets go of her to pull Felix into a hug, Euna eyeing you awkwardly as the two of them catch up. Euna had never been rude to you, never made a snarky comment about you being friends with Chan, but she never really said much around you if you were honest. 

‘’Your dress is super pretty’’ you squeak out attempting to break the silence between you two, She offers up a small thank you and a tight smile and turns to Chan as he pulls her into his side, his attention now on the two of you instead of the tipsy blonde Aussie

 ‘’Hey y/n’’ Chan smiles as he lets go of Euna and pulls you into a quick side hug, letting go as quickly as he’d pulled you in, his soft musky scent filling your senses. The four of you make small talk, Chan's eyes catching your own as Felix rambles to Euna about his current pc build. The air starts to feel suffocating, his glances making you feel trapped. You quickly make an excuse to leave, Chan's smile faltering as you excuse yourself from their conversation and disappear into the crowd of bodies. 

It was impossible to think while Chan was standing there, his arms wrapped around Euna unapologetically. The jealousy burning more than the straight tequila sloshing around in your cup, you start to sway to the music begging yourself to forget about him and enjoy your night. You feel a pair of eyes follow your silhouette but you continue to drink and dance, the alcohol making its way through your system and drowning out every thought.

 You feel a figure behind you grabbing your hips and swaying with you, turning your head to see the blurred outline of Hyunjin, his hair in his eyes, a pair of red sunglasses perched on his nose. You let yourself melt into him, you'd always found him attractive anyway. You and Hyunjin move together perfectly, his smooth movements guiding your own as he whispers the lyrics to the song in your ear, his plump lips catching your skin slightly. You finally move your eyes to Chan still feeling someone watching you, secretly wishing it was him. You’re met with a sharp glare, his eyes never leaving you and Hyunjin, his jaw locked in annoyance, you roll your eyes at him and turn around to face Hyunjin winding your arms around his slender neck. 

You turn back to glance at Chan to find him charging your way, ripping you from your dance partner's embrace and towards the stairwell. 

‘’Chan what the fuck are you doing?’’ you yell, trying to wriggle your wrist from his strong grip as he pulls you upstairs and into one of the empty bedrooms.

‘’What the fuck am I doing? What the fuck are YOU doing y/n? Grinding all over Hyunjin like that’’

‘’We are not doing this right now, why does it have anything to do with you, Chan? Why do you even care?’’ venom coating your words, attempting to open the door and leave but being stopped short when he stands in the way, eyes burning into yours. Chan had never been like this with you, what had gotten into him?

‘’What? Are you suddenly into Hyunjin?? We both know he's not right for you y/n’’  his eyebrows knitted in annoyance.

‘’And how would you know what's best for me Chan? We hardly talk anymore!’’ you run your fingers through your hair, easing the tension building up behind your eyes. 

‘’Of course we still talk, you know i've been busy’’ he fires back, disregarding how much space really had built up between the two of you. 

’Give it up Chan and go back to Euna, what I do with Hyunjin has fuck all to do with you’’ you can't deal with the confusion, why is he acting like he's jealous of you and Hyunjin? Why does it matter to him? 

‘’’I’m your best friend y/n of course it has something to do with me, he's not right for you’’ 

‘’Oh my god get your head out of your ass chan, just like you said, you're my best friend not my boyfriend. You can date but I can't? I'm not gonna wait on you to notice me for the rest of my life’’ You turn your face away from him, your confidence and fire slipping as Chan studies you intensely, the room silent apart from your breathing. 

‘’My god you’re an idiot’’ Chan mumbles before grabbing your chin and smashing his lips onto yours, you melt into the kiss at first before snapping out of it and pushing him away

Chan what are you doing?’’ You feel dizzy as you maintain your balance, your hands still pressed against his toned chest. your lungs heaving in time with the thud of the music coming from below. 

‘’You really have no idea, do you? I’m fucking in love with you y/n, why do you think I even started dating Euna in the first place, I wanted to get over you, why else would I jump into a relationship with a girl I hardly knew??’’ The annoyance in his voice evident as he goes on, he runs his hand through his hair repeatedly,  messy waves falling in his face. 

You stare up at him stunned, your lips parted in surprise, he pulls you back in, his lips covering yours as he presses you into him with fervour. He deepens the kiss and walks you backwards, his hands pressing into your hips, his hold nothing like hyunjins. He pulls away his eyes searching yours for something, anything. 

“Tell me to stop, if you don't want this I’ll walk away” his voice is breathy and pained, evident that the last thing he wanted was for you to say now.

You've waited too long for this, for him to need you, touch you. You know it's wrong, his girlfriend just a floor below but you’ve wanted and waited too much to stop and walk away, you can deal with your moral shortcomings tomorrow. 

‘’Please, Chan’’ you whisper, desperate for him to touch you again, clenching your thighs together as heat pools in your lower stomach, your insides on fire for him. He watches how desperate you are for him, your answer clear.

‘’Fuck you’re perfect’’ you look at him pleadingly and he can't hold back anymore, he’d thought about you like this too many times to count, in dreams and when awake. When he can't sleep and he fucks his fist wishing it was you, how pretty your moans would sound as he rocked into you, how tight you'd be around him, how his cum would leak out of your fluttering hole. He was too far gone, a man possessed. 

You gasp as he pushes you back on the bed, his weight pressing you into the mattress perfectly, he licks and nips at your jaw, his hand finding your soaked underwear under your skirt, circling your puffy clit through the slick fabric. 

“You’re so wet for me baby, bet Hyunjin could never have this effect on you. Gonna fuck you so good you'll forget he exists’’ his words making you tingle, his fingers exactly where you need them.

‘’Only want you’’ Your voice comes out breathy and fucked out even though he’s barely touched you and it sends a rush of blood to Chan's already rock-solid cock, straining against the tight fabric of his black jeans.

He sinks two fingers into your tight pussy and you scream in pleasure and pain at the intrusion, his fingers so much thicker and longer than yours, the stretch taking your breath away 

‘’Yeah be a good girl and take my fingers in that tight little cunt, I know you can’’ The way he whispers as your pussy stretches around his fingers and wet squelches echo through the room has you throwing your head back, Chans other hand finding your tits as he stretches you out for him. You shake as he moves his fingers in and out of you, the stretch now dissolved into intense pleasure. He can tell you're close, your eyes closed in pleasure as you sigh out his name.

‘’cum for me pretty, cum around my fingers’’ You moan his name over and over as he rubs your soaking clit and plunges his fingers into your sopping hole,  your back arching in pleasure as he works you through your high. Shouting his name as you cum on his fingers. He pulls his fingers out, bringing them to his mouth and licking them clean. The sight alone already making you needy for more 

‘’Need you so bad baby, need to feel you milk my cock’’ he breathes out as he undoes his belt, desperate to be inside of you. You spread your sticky thighs, your glistening pussy on full display for him. His cock springs free from its confines, his pink tip leaking down onto the rest of his thick veiny length. It was no surprise he had the prettiest cock you'd ever seen. He gives it a few pumps, slapping your clit with his bulbous tip, and you moan in pleasure at the sting. 

‘’Take it, baby. Gonna stretch you out so good, gonna make you mine’’ his voice shaky as he presses into you, your pussy spasming around his hard length splitting you open, he slowly bottoms out with a moan stilling inside you. His cock making your stomach bulge with his size 

‘’Fuckfuckfuckkkk you're still so tight, such a perfect pussy’’ his words coming out more like a mantra, the feeling of you around him making him pussydrunk. He fucks in and out of you grabbing your thighs, spreading you wider for him, watching where you’re joined as he takes you. 

 ‘’talk to me baby girl, tell me how I make you feel’’ 

‘’Love it when you fuck me Channie, love your cock so much’’ your voice strained and whiny, writhing against the sheets as he sets a rough pace. He spits on your pussy, the liquid dripping down to where you meet, the sight only aiding his pleasure. 

‘’Bet you thought about this huh? Thought about how good it would feel when I ruin you, hmm baby? Bet you’d touch this little clit thinking about how good I would fuck you?’’ His thrusts become sloppy as he nears his orgasm, his fingers coming to circle your clit. Your moans getting louder as you get close for the second time.

‘’Cum with me baby, wanna cum in this pussy, fill you up with my cum’’ his thrusts getting more erratic and desperate as you orgasm together. You scream his name, your nails digging into his toned back muscles. Chan stills as he spurts his hot release into you, his cum painting your insides a milky white. He collapses onto you, his muscled chest pressed against your fucked out form, both of you breathing heavily. 

‘’Fuck you're mine, just mine’’ he whispers, his cock still inside you, both your release leaking out around his still hard dick.. 

‘’Yeah just yours, Channie’’ you breathe out dreamily, still coming down from your high  

You both lay like that for a while, Chan's face tucked into your neck, leaving gentle kisses, his cock stiffening again inside of you, the party coming to an end downstairs. Things had happened so fast you hadn't realised Chan brought you to his own room, the purple lights giving his skin a lilac hue. 

‘’Chan. What happens now?” You hesitate not wanting to ruin the moment, praying you didn't just fuck everything up with him with a simple question.

He sighs into your skin snuggling closer ‘’I meant it when I said you're mine y/n, Euna knows she and I are done, she knew I was in love with you. I want this, I want you’’ his voice soft and sleepy. 

Your heart nearly explodes, ‘’I love you too Chan, I want you too’’ you kiss him passionately, his tongue fighting yours for dominance, smiling into the kiss as he begins moving inside you again. It feels like a dream and you can't believe he's in love with you too, that he wants you like you want him. Now you have him you'll never let him go, you have always been his, even if he didn't know it. 

‘’It's always been you y/n’’

-ty for reading!! Alr working on more hehe

[batfsm]

I wrote a fanfic for this but I now need a title…and a summary.

Warnings: I don’t say outright in the story, in my opinion, but i imply a lot of child abuse and sexual assault to children. So be careful please.

I do speak of death and drugs but only in passing.

The story is under the cut. It got away from me. I just wanted to write about Jason and Tim running from Bruce and next thing I know Dick and Alfred are in it, Leslie is mentioned as is Jim, Roy, Lian, Oliver, Damian, and Talia. (Cass and Duke are implied.)

I hope you enjoy @ky-landfill. I’m putting it up tomorrow on my AO3 so I’ll edit in the link then. (Hopefully a name and summary also. Especially a title.)

Edit: Figured both out.

Meetings

Summary: A sound had Jason dropping the tire.

A sound had Jason dropping the tire he just took off and reaching for Tim who came willingly.

Tim climbed onto Jason’s back as the older boy started to run, a move they had practiced for hours until they got it smoothly, and Jason gripped his tire iron harder as he moved faster.

A body suddenly dropping in front of him had Jason sliding to a stop and crunching a bit.

Tim peeked over Jason’s shoulder and felt his eyes widen. Other than that the only other reaction was his tightening grip on his elder brother’s shoulders.

Jason glared as he shifted a bit more to hide Tim and lifted his tire iron. “Leave us alone!”

Batman glared. “Why did you take my tires?”

“None of ya business. We aren’t anymore, so let us go.”

“You’re coming with me.” Batman I growled.

“Fuck off, you big boob!” Jason shouted before rushing Batman.

The man was so surprised that he couldn’t stop the hit to his abdomen. As Batman doubled over, Jason ran past as fast as he could.

[They wouldn’t be found for a week and it wasn’t by Batman. Robin, who came back to visit Agent A and was reluctantly patrolling with Batman, though he was internally glad to be home, ran into Tim by accident.

Tim, when faced with one of his heroes, just stared as he had at Batman before grinning and asking Robin if he wanted to come meet his big brother.

Robin, who was told about the story by a mulish Batman, grinned brightly and agreed.

The young boy led the way to their hideout only to find Jason struggling against a man. Robin didn’t even blink as he took the man down and then fussed over the two boys.

Tim clung to Jason who clung back as Robin looked around and then called Agent A who came to pick the boys up and take them to dinner and then Doctor Thompson’s clinic to be looked over.

As Leslie looked the two civilians over, Agent A snuck out and back to the hideout where the downed man was just coming around.

(Commissioner Gordon ended up with a man beaten up and files full of evidence against the man and others hurting children. Jim Gordon took pleasure in slapping charge after charge on the man and the others, including more police officers who he had thought were not corrupt.)

When Agent A joined the trio, Batman was with him. (Bruce had gotten his own hits in when he saw files on Dick and Roy. Oliver had been alerted and was hunting down the men and women in Star City that were a bit to interested in children, especially his son.) Batman, who had found the files and most of the evidence, dropped to his knees and hugged the three boys. He silently vowed to do better in his relationship with Dick and to keep a close eye on the two younger boys and where they would be placed.

Batman redid the vow months later to include all his children when he finally admitted to Alfred and himself that Jason and Tim were best left with the family.

Jason and Tim, like Dick, was the best thing that happened to him.

All his children, present and future were.]

[Roy and Oliver’s arguments in the future would never get as bad as they should have been because Oliver followed Bruce’s example and opened up to his son. Roy would be able to fall back on his dad when he started to get addicted and would have the support he desperately needed from the start. Lian would grow and never die since she was with her dad and grandpa all the time and not just Roy.

The whole family would be happier.]

[Jason, by way, never became estranged from the family. He does die but Talia puts him straight into the Pit and then takes him home with Damian.]

Fuck off, you big boob!

[quokkaholic]

Teenage Heaven h.j

Warnings: MDNI, fluffy smut with some plot, alcohol consumption, kissin and touchin, f nipple play, dry humping, cussing duh. Lightly edited

Synopsis: (NOT about teens)Y/n and Han are in the early stages of their relationship and are meeting up in NYC for the first time since you met initially while he is there for work. Despite being long distance, neither of you want to rush into sleeping together, but that doesn’t mean you guys can’t do other stuff to satisfy your cravings.

Song recommendation: Teenage Heaven by Be Your Own Pet

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Han was anxious to tell you that, as much as he wanted to greet you at the baggage claim, it just wasn’t possible, no matter how much he begged staff to allow it. Despite that, he assured you he’s tracking your flight and will be in a car there waiting for you. When the plane lands in NYC, you turn off airplane mode to send a message to Han only to be inundated by messages from him.

“I cant believe i get to see you in a few hours”

“Im scared”

“And excited”

“Mostly excited”

“I can’t think about anything else. Why aren’t you here already?”

“It’s only been like half an hour”

“Im going to squeeze the life out of you”

“You should be scared too”

“I’m getting no work done”

“This is dumb asf”

“I should’ve been camping at your gate since last night”

“Should’ve never left the airport, and just waited there for you”

“You should be landing in an hour and 47 minutes”

“I keep trying to get them to take me to the airport already. They brush me off like im crazy”

“not crazy”

“Maybe for you tho 😉”

“Headed your way! Yuuh!”

“We’re parked outside”

“You landed 2 minutes ago…WHERE ARE YOU?”

“I tried to make a break for it, but staff knows me too well. child lock is on”

You are grinning at the phone screen as you read them, not only because of how adorable it is, but because you feel similarly. You tried to take a little nap on the flight, but your nerves and anticipation kept you wide awake. You let Han know that your plane hasn’t even taxied into the gate yet, but you'll be with him as fast as your legs can carry you.

“What does your bag look like? I could send someone to go get it for you, so you can just come straight to me. I'm already doing it. What color is it? Does it have a tag or anything?” He’s doing everything in his power to get you into his arms as soon as possible.

“I didn’t check a bag, Sungie. I just have my carryon and a backpack, so I can come straight to you ☺️” 

“Perfect. Better run babe”

Typically when you fly, you are one of the last ones to exit the plane, waiting for everyone else to grab their stuff from the overhead bins and trudge through the crowded aisle, but today you were the first one standing. You think people could sense your urgency; no one even tried to hop out in front as you slipped between the seats. Following the signs, you speed walk to the pick up area that Han is parked at. Your eyes are immediately drawn to a blacked out luxury hatchback with a tint as dark as us legally allowed; there's a man standing at the back resting on the bumper, and he waves you over. As you approach you see an almost unrecognizable figure wearing sunglasses, a mask, and beanie with his face smushed up against the dark glass. When you reach the car, the staff member waiting for you opens the trunk, and you go to pick up your luggage to load it, but are thrown off by a shout from the backseat of the vehicle.

“Y/nnah! Get in the damn car!”

You stayed up late last night stressing about this very moment. How would it feel to see him again? What if the connection isn’t there like it was last time? Would it be awkward? Would you two just end up sitting in silence? As you enter the car, you realize your hours of anxiety ridden overthinking were all for nothing. He immediately clings to you pulling you in for a soul warming embrace. You somehow manage to end up simultaneously both be in each other's laps becoming a roiling lump of limbs and love, unable to tear your hands off him. Memorizing how he feels, for those nights where you question if he is even real or just a self indulgent illusion. There are a few shared kisses, but you are holding yourselves back for the sake of the driver and security in the front seat.

Seeing him in person is a bit like seeing a ghost, and it has you and Han both in a state of awe. There is, in fact, a period of dreaded quiet between you and Han, but it's not awkward. It’s one you two share intentionally to bask in your togetherness. You are both but caught up in the moment, unable to believe this truly happened and worked out. Smiling at eachother with rosy cheeks and racing hearts, you train all of your senses on him, barely even noticing the soft sound of the radio in the background. 

You go over what the next few days of your vacation have in store with Han. When planning, initially he pitched going on a date tonight, but after some discussion, you both decided it would be better to have a hotel room date and just order food, so you cans have uninterrupted couple time for the first time.

The hotel is stunning, way fancier than you've ever stayed at. You enter through a back entrance that is arguably more grandiose than the main lobby as it's only used for high profile guests. Han shows you to your suite; his room is only a little down the hall. Opposed to your typical single rooms with a bathroom and a kitchenette, this place is like a luxury apartment: bedroom, living room, dining area, massive bathroom with a bathtub and shower, and a separate toilet room all designed and littered in the most up to date, trendy decor.

“Ji, you didn’t have to do all this. A normal room would have been more than acceptable!”

“Y/nn I know I didn’t have to. I do this because I want to. Plus, I kind of intend to be over here a lot, so I didn’t want it to be too cramped. I also wanted there to be a place we could sit together that wasn't the bed to be… respectful I guess” He can’t hold your gaze as the last part passes his lips. 

“You're so sweet, Jisung” You say as you walk over to him after you dropped your bags. He's cheeks hot and avoiding your eyes; you are drawn to him, possessed to hug and squeeze and never let go. The snuggle pulls Han out of his shyness caused by your compliment.

“That was the first time I’ve heard you say my name in person” He says nuzzling his face into your neck. He snakes his hands around your waist and delivers his promise from earlier; Han squeezes you so hard, like an python, he manages to squeeze tighter and tighter while attacking your neck with quick tight lipped pecks until your back cracks. It startles him a bit, gasping and releasing his hold to grab your shoulders with a look of horror on his face. If you weren’t immediately cackling about it, he would have been worried he hurt you. 

Han was considerate enough to think ahead, and the food was to be delivered soon after you guys arrived at the hotel for an early dinner so you guys could spend the evening together. For now there is nothing to do but enjoy being in each other’s company, and it feels so right. It's tender beyond comprehension, but not overly explicit: gentle kisses and even gentler hands traveling up ticklish sides or through lush hair.  Running your hands up and down his toned arms, you can't help but grab them briefly, feeling his muscles flex under your touch; they have definitely grown since the last time you saw him. You guys slowly start to get more and more comfortable and bold. The soft grazes transition to firm pets, but there is soon a knock on the door. He took your suggestion, and ordered from your favorite restaurant from the last time you were here as well as a bottle of your favorite wine which he must’ve committed to memory from a long passed conversation, as you don't even remember sharing that info. 

Dinner is a dream. The table is by the massive glass sliding doors that lead out to the balcony allowing the city lights to stream in. It goes without saying that the chat is immaculate, but the energy is so familiar and fun. You aren’t worried about eating too much in front of him or talking with your mouth full. Jisung just makes you feel comfortable and admired, like you can just be yourself and he’ll savor every moment. Once dinner is over and the bottle of wine is empty, you two make your way to the couch under the guise of wanting to show you some new music he has been working on, but the intense stares and frequent brushing hands had the tension quite high. He simply turns on some tunes to not be in silence, before your lips find each other. 

The intimacy from early returns tenfold with newly injected sensuality. The firm grips progress to needy grasping, with daring finger dipping under the hems of your shirts, and you find yourselves in a passionate makeout. Although the kiss is hot and lustful, his tongue is timid in its exploration, so soft and gentle as it glides through your mouth, careful to tame his raging desire and not to use too much force. It becomes the sloppy and impassioned kind of kiss you can lose hours to. Your session goes till your lips are swollen and your hair is a mess. You would say the light lip product you had on was gone, but you know exactly where it is, it’s smeared out all over and around your mouths only adding to the kissed raw look. Han’s messy love drunk expression spurs you on, and while traveling your kisses down to his neck, his hands grip your hips to lift and guide you to straddle him. You don’t hesitate to follow his lead.

Settling yourself down onto him, you both let out a small gasp, and you have to fight your instinct to seek friction, but your restraint is short lived. After Ji undoes your bra and helps you remove it from under your shirt, his hands are glued to your breasts gently kneading while intermittently rubbing his thumbs over your nipples drawing soft moans from your lips and little circles of your hips.

You keep trying to give him attention by kissing his shoulders or nibbling on his ear, but he will only let you do it for a moment before he switches his affections back to you. Once you notice the pattern, you pull away for a second, also partially to catch your breath. You ask through pants,

“Am I doing okay? You keep cutting me short,” staring down into his eyes you see no sign of discontent. In fact, at your words his full cheeks tense into a big smile before going back to attacking your neck and mumbling against your skin like he can’t look at you when he admits,

“You just sound too good, Yn. I can’t get enough.”

His words alone make you whimper into his ear causing him to shiver. He begins to move lower, lingering on your collar bones. Licking and nipping. He lightly presses together and lifts your tits to his mouth to kiss them through your shirt. Kissing all over but planting light kisses to your hard bud before switching to the other. He reaches for the bottom hem of your top and looks up to check in before he proceeds.

“This okay?” You struggle to find your words and just nod down to him with your lips pressed together, but he asks again wanting a verbal confirmation from you as he begins to raise your top.

“Feels good baby?”

It would be much easier to respond if he wasn’t giving feather light kissing to your sensitive nipples.

“Yes, Ji. I… I really like it” you say, gasping as he pinches your bud between his top teeth and tongue. Screwing your eyes shut as seeing him look up through his tousled hair with his adoring gaze, mouth connected to your chest, makes you feel like you’re going to melt. You can no longer restrain the involuntary rutting of your hip and decide to just commit. One of Han's hands shoots down to grip your hip tight enough to leave fingerprints and presses you down to grind into him. His previously low and soft moans are rising in volume and frequency being dampened by your skin. Your linen pants are cute and were so comfortable for the flight, but they do little in the way of concealing what you are grinding against. They are so thin that you can target your clit onto the zipper fold of his jeans over the shaft of his hard cock.

With all the work Han has put in with his mouth, it doesn’t take many circles of your hips to get the heat and pressure in your lower stomach to rise. You grab either side of Han's face and remove his mouth as the pleasure was starting to become too much and smash your lips down on his and moan into the kiss. Keeping your pressure firm and rhythm consistent, Han’s breath is trembling, whimpering and whispering your name. His sounds, his words, his touch, it all works together in symphony, and you contract forward to rest your head on his shoulder and groan as the you reach the tipping point and you orgasm radiates through you. As you hold onto him and attempt to ride out your pleasure, the sensation of Han now gripping you with both hands pushing you down on his lap, aiding in your grinding as he fucks up against you have another high crashing over you. His voice is shaky when he finds the ability to speak,

“Fuck. Feels so… I’m gonna…Oh my god”

His rolling of his hips has turned to erratic bucking as he cums hard shuddering, wrapping his arms around you and squeezing like earlier.

“Holy shit. I haven’t jizzed my pants since I was a teen” Han giddily admits with just a twinge of embarrassment, still clinging to you trying to catch his breath.

“This is a first for me! Didn’t know it could even happen” you confess still winded from the pleasure, causing you both to let out weak laughter, neither of you daring to move for a few minutes, just lounging in the afterglow. You guys decide that Han will stay to watch some stuff and if he just so happens to fall asleep here, oh well, right? Getting two rooms was out of respect and consideration, but you both knew you’d end up sleeping in the same bed. He lets you freshen up in the bathroom first, and once you exit, he has a fresh set of clothes in his arms. He must’ve called one of the guys to bring them. 

The rest of the night is filled with endless snuggles and random movies you can find on the hotel channels; the Harry Potter movies always seem to be on TV, so you end up watching two random ones of the series out of order. Han offers to go get his laptop to hook up to the tv, but neither of you care enough to walk the 40 feet down to his room and back. This night isn't about the movies, it's about taking in every moment of being in the same room. You guys end up staying up late flicking through channels, becoming amateur film critics. It's a bit past 1am when Han has the brilliant idea for you guys to go to a convenience store nearby and pick up some ice cream. You are in the city that never sleeps, and you will never turn down an adventure or a sweet treat. He sends a text to Minho claiming he can’t get ice cream without at least offering to get one for his best friend.

“Going to get ice cream. Meet in lobby in 10”

You and Han put on your shoes and coats and share a few more smooches before you can’t for 20 minutes.

“Did Minho respond?”

“No but he read it”

“So..?”

“He’s probably already down there waiting for us”

˚｡𖦹 ⋆｡° ˚｡𖦹 ⋆｡° ˚｡𖦹 ⋆｡° ˚｡𖦹 ⋆｡° ˚｡𖦹 ⋆｡° ˚｡𖦹 ⋆｡° ˚｡𖦹 ⋆｡

A.n- I initially wrote this for a Han fic I was making before I realized that writing long form fanfic was not for me, so there's a bit more plot in this one. Thanks for reading.

-mo 💕

Mastserlist

[simpurnatural]

NSWF ALPHABET || Min Ho Moon Edition

XO, Kitty - Min Ho Moon x Fem!Reader

Note from Nat: "I think it's safe to say that we all would like a slice of Min Ho Moon. But hopefully this smutty alphabet helps us cope! Enjoy babe <3"

Warning ⚠️: NSFW, Smut, Cussing, Kinks

A = Aftercare (What they’re like after sex)

Minho likes to clean you up with a towel and wipes. But definitely prefers a shower if your legs are up to it.

B = Body part (Their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

Minho's favorite body part of his own are his hands because they help him explore and please you. Your mouth is his favorite whether he's kissing it, fucking, or hearing whatever explicit noises you make for him.

C = Cum (Anything to do with cum basically… I’m a disgusting person)

He loves the feeling of you cumming around his cock and watch as it drips out of your pussy.

D = Dirty Secret (Pretty self-explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

He loves riling you up, getting into a heated debate with you. There's something about the way you assert yourself which makes him wish you were more dominate in the bedroom.

E = Experience (How experienced are they? Do they know what they’re doing?)

UH HELLO? He's literally considered a playboy. I think it's self-explanatory.

F = Favorite Position (This goes without saying. Will probably include a visual)

Missionary, even though that sounds pretty basic. But literally whatever position that allows him access to your entire body, especially your tits.

G = Goofy (Are they more serious in the moment, or are they humorous, etc)

I wouldn't necessarily say he's a goofball during sex, but he definitely loves to tease you.

H = Hair (How well-groomed are they, does the carpet match the drapes, etc.)

Min Ho shaves down there regularly and considering his love for skin care, I think the carpets do in fact match the drapes.

I = Intimacy (How are they during the moment, romantic aspect…)

He isn't vanilla but will definitely be gentle and soft a majority of the time. But he also has his hot, raunchy, rough days.

J = Jack Off (Masturbation headcanon)

Knowing that it gets you going to watch him stroke his dick is really one of the only reasons he does it. Plus, he likes watching you stroke it for him like a good girl.

K = Kink (One or more of their kinks)

Min Ho has a praise kink that hasn't fully tapped into because he wants to remain seemingly dominant. He also has a dom kink but would love to see you ride him like a cowgirl. Ooh also a sugar daddy kink, he wants to take of you as much as possible.

L = Location (Favorite places to do the do)

The bedroom or any bedroom for that matter. Not saying that you guys haven't tried it anywhere else... ;)

M = Motivation (What turns them on, gets them going)

Min Ho gets turned on by the sight of you in the clothes he buys for you. Whether that may be dresses, heels, bathing suits, more intimate pieces o_o

N = NO (Something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

He doesn't want anyone else in the bedroom doing the deed with you guys. He also doesn't see a need for toys or any contraptions either.

O = Oral (Preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc)

Okay I know I said that he was a seasoned and experienced man, but he still needs some work on giving. But he loves watching you work on length whilst he sits back and enjoys the scene.

P = Pace (Are they fast and rough? Slow and sensual? etc.)

Min Ho can do both, but it definitely depends on his mood. Fast and rough if you've teased him far too much or he's had a bad day. Slow and sensual is when you guys are completely on your own without any distractions.

Q = Quickie (Their opinions on quickies rather than proper sex, how often, etc.)

He loves a good quickie. In the car? Yes. In a storage room? Yes. Between classes? Yes.

R = Risk (Are they game to experiment, do they take risks, etc.)

He doesn't like most experimentation because for him, his body and yours is enough for a brilliant time. But loves to joke about you two getting caught.

S = Stamina (How many rounds can they go for, how long do they last…)

He never wants to overexert you nor himself so two rounds max in one go.

T = Toy (Do they own toys? Do they use them? On a partner or themselves?)

Toys are a no no for Min Ho.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

He loves to tease you, especially when in public spaces where neither of each other can fulfill your lustful needs in the moment. He also loves when you tease him, it somehow always catches him off guard.

V = Volume (How loud they are, what sounds they make)

He won't be shouting from the roof tops, but you'll be hearing some low groans and moans from him.

W = Wild Card (Get a random headcanon for the character of your choice)

Min Ho is definitely the type of guy to book an air bnb or luxury penthouse for the weekend so you two can playhouse *if you know what I mean...*

X = X-Ray (Let’s see what’s going on in those pants, picture or words)

He has decent girth but is lengthier than you may think.

Y = Yearning (How high is their sex drive?)

Min Ho being a gentleman is up to it if you're up for it. But if it were completely up to him then ya'll might never leave the bedroom.

Z = ZZZ (… how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

He'll fall asleep as soon as he knows you're cleaned up and taken care of.

JAN 2025

[itwasntimethatdidit40]

How could you love somebody like me?

Pairing: f!reader x Javier Peña Words count: 3032 Rating: + 18, NSFW, MDNI. Summary: Javi is under protection and has asked you to join him in the hotel room where he is confined. When you discover his secrets and lies, however, that room will become too small. Too small for both of you. Tags/warnings: POV second person, no use of y/n, angst, Javi is still a DEA agent but it's a modern setting so the man has a smartphone. Reader is described having female genitalia and breasts, no other description of her is given, she doesn't blush and her hair is not described. Mention of alcohol, mention of cheating, Javi is a cheater, no happy ending, we will go through the man's phone (you're not supposed to do that but I never said my reader could do no wrong, right?), use of pet names (gatita which means kitten in Spanish, baby, darling), smut, angry sex, unprotected p in v (do better irl), cream pie, of course a little nipple play ‘cause it’s still my fic, toxic relationship, self doubt, mention of Steve, a huge pile of lies, Javi is bad at feelings, some reader’s thoughts marked in italics. I think it's all, let me know if I forgot something and I'll add it right away. A/N: Written for @jolapeno 's "Dear-uary" challenge. This was my prompt, I struggled a little bit at first but I ended up having a blast writing this ❤︎ Heavily inspired by this song (from which the fic also takes its title), I heard it randomly on Spotify one day and I thought "wait, this is perfect for Javi!" and I ended up being obsessed with two more songs by the same artist. LOL Many thanks to: - @aurorawritestoescape , my beta, for her help and advice, she will probably dream of elephants because of me tonight hahaha Kate I own you a big one, thanks baby so much, I love you ❤️ - The person who basically pulled this out of my brain and supported me throughout the process, my precious, my peanut @joelmillerisapunk. 🥰 Love you so much it's ridiculous🥹 - @milla-frenchy for letting me blather about this thing some days ago. Love you, bb ❤︎ English is not my first language, every single mistake is still on me, I deeply apologize if you find any.

Edited - because I forgot to change the most important detail, of course. I’m not myself if I’m not doing a mess. Yay. It’s okay now.

“Why the hell am I here? Was I the only available hole this week?”

“No,” he whispers. 

“So what?” 

Javier came back and found you in the middle of the room.

You were brandishing his phone like a sword in the air, the banner of everything that was wrong.

His face went pale when he saw you like that. 

Eyes wide open. 

Mouth agape. 

He tried to say something but you immediately hit him with a vomit of words.

“I know what you’re doing,” you hiss under your breath, feeling your eyes sting.

Javier is a marble statue in front of you, his lips pressed together, his absent eyes not even looking at you, staring at a spot behind your shoulders, his arms abandoned along his sides. 

He seems anchored to the ground. 

His last words to you still burn on your skin like a fire you cannot extinguish.

A heavy silence between you fills the air of the room and makes it unbreathable. 

“Fuck, Javier, talk to me,” you whisper angrily.

You clutch his phone in your hands, so tightly that your knuckles are white from exertion, as if you were clinging to it to keep yourself from falling off a cliff. 

“You knew I was no good,” he says sternly.

You have been in this room for two days. 

Officially, Javier has to stay here because henchmen of one of the new drug lords in town are set on taking him out. 

Unofficially, he has you infiltrating the room. 

Typical Javier, spending his time under protection fucking someone. 

You foolishly almost believed it was romantic, until this morning. 

“So you’re trying to say that it’s my fault? Is that what you want to say? It’s my fault that as soon as I turn my back you go and stick your cock in someone else's pussy?” You don’t even have the strength to scream right now. Your voice comes out rancorous but low, hoarse, like a blown growl. 

Oh, you’re not going to accept being lectured by him, fuck no.

“No, I’m just saying -” he tries to explain and you glare at him, making the words die in his mouth.  

"What?" 

“Fuck, I'll never change,” he shrugs as if it were a truism that only you can't grasp.

His eyes shift to the ground, dull and absent.

“You don't change because you are convinced that you can't,” you admonish him, feeling anger rising from your chest. 

"That's not true," he murmurs, keeping his gaze on the crimson and gold carpet that lies at your feet.

“Yes, it is,” you insist, ”and you seem to like to think of yourself as an incurable asshole.”

He still fails to see the real problem, the elephant in the room that lives and thrives among you. 

"Then you tell me, if you think you know me so well,” he asks with defiance. 

“You bet I fucking know you,” you lash out. “You think you're so mysterious and complicated?! Well,  news flash, I've seen plenty like you. You’re just another man. You're not even that, you're a child. A child who's afraid of his own shadow when it comes to relationships.”

“Don’t fucking analyze me,” he hisses, finally setting his eyes back on you. 

Raven, angry and fearful. He knows you can read him like an open book and this unleashes an awareness upon him that crushes him to the ground.

You bitterly laugh, “Truth hurts, huh? I know something about it”. 

The wrinkle between his eyebrows deepens, his nostrils flare, and his mouth tightens into a line so thin you think he’s about to burst. He stays quiet instead, eyes back on the damask carpet decoration. 

_____________

“Yes, Steve, I'm fine. That jerk won't find me here, and anyway it's full of police outside the door.” 

A pause and a sigh. 

”No, no one followed her, they don't know who she is.”

You stood behind the half-closed bathroom door listening. 

You smiled. 

His voice sounded softer when he talked about you. You lulled yourself into that feeling. 

Until you heard something else. 

A booming laugh. 

Water ran in the shower, tiny droplets coated the wall as the mirror fogged up.

“Whatever. Of course I'm still screwing around. At least, I was doing it before that asshole started chasing me,” his voice suddenly lowered so you took a chance and opened the door a little more. You wanted to make sure you heard right. 

Your hand trembled against the doorknob, you grabbed your wrist to hold it steady. 

“You idiot,” he scoffed. “Yeah, we'll be in touch.”

Suspicion. The black wing of a crow that had been wrapped around your heart for a long time.

But then why did it hurt so much? 

You allowed yourself to hide it in a part of your brain where you never looked-that was a mistake. Making the hunch barely a firefly when it was supposed to be a bright neon sign.

He always places the phone with its screen down when you go out to dinner, softly smiling at it when he checks it after a few vibrations, telling you “it’s Steve” when you ask. 

But you know that crooked smile. 

He dodges when you ask him about his day "oh work, you know, just work." 

He tells you he is with Steve but you hear female voices in the background. 

Every time you try to confront him it always ends the same way, him telling you, “you’re paranoid, there’s no one else, just you, baby. You’re the only one I want.”

And then he fucks your doubts into oblivion.

You heard the thud of the phone on the blankets. And then Javier calling you. 

You swallowed the gall rising from the walls of your stomach and just smiled when he joined you in the bathroom and suggested that you shower together.

You wanted some proof before you charged him. 

If there was anything you had learned from being with him, it was that hard evidence was the key. So you played cool. 

He fucked you against the shower wall and you moaned into his neck. 

He licked your pussy like a man starved and you just bit your lips until you felt iron on your tongue.

He kissed you with that liar's mouth, and you let him.

And you fell asleep beside him, on the unmade bed of your uncertainties. 

This morning someone from outside called him into the hallway to report the latest movements of the guy who was looking for him. 

His phone was on the bedside table.

It was like a magnet, pulling your hand to it.

You were almost sure you knew his unlock code ‘cause you had watched the movements of his finger many times. 

You tried twice without success. 

The third time you let out a long sigh, visualized in your mind the movement one more time and unlocked it. 

You were in. 

Your heart was beating wildly in your chest as your fingers swiped and clicked on the screen. 

And there they were.

Dozens and dozens of messages and pics exchanged with 4 different women.

You scrolled through one of the chats with a certain Maria, who regularly sent him pictures of her tits and her legs spread wide, her pussy in the shot.

There was sexting, arranged dates, same promises he gave to you, things you never asked for but he kept repeating like a broken record. Even the same pet name. Gatita. 

Blood simmered in your veins, a jolt in your heart, throat dry. 

Your finger furiously scrolled through the chat, finding tons of messages he had sent her while he was with you.

You switched to another one and you found pretty much the same. And yet another, message after message containing flirting and explicit sex.  

“Oh Javi, you keep getting better and better with that cock of yours”

“My pussy needs you, darling, can you come over?”

“I can’t stop thinking about your huge cock dripping on me”

And the more you scrolled, the more a question formed in your brain, rumbling through your temples like a deafening drum. 

Was he ever sincere with you?

________

When he looks up at you again, you see it. A veil of fragility in the dense blackness of his gaze.

He looks almost helpless. “I know you tried,” he admits, ”You tried harder than anyone else.”

“Apparently it was no use,” you chastise him.

He doesn’t reply. 

Instead he comes closer and closer. 

You pull back, responding to his every step forward with a backward one. 

“Please,” he whispers. 

“No.” 

“Don't do that.”

“You have no right to tell me what to do,” you bark.

”I know...” 

“Fuck off, Javier, leave me alone.”

You pull back until you hit the wall behind you. 

Javier approaches, bending slightly to reach your mouth, his mustache brushes against your cupid’s bow and you don't even have the strength to turn your face away anymore. 

When your lips collide you let it happen. 

It’s like when you drink too much Tequila. 

It burns on your tongue, leaving you almost anesthetized as soon as you down it, and then an aromatic taste wafts into your mouth; it is lysergic, unusual, unmistakable.

You love it, so you keep doing it.

Javier is the same. 

He's sharp, stiff at the edges, burns like fire, but he has an aura that you won’t mistake for anything and he hypnotizes you. He’s not like anyone else, despite what you told him. There is an underlying despair in him, a cry dying in his throat, “How can you love someone like me?” 

He says it only with his eyes but you hear it clearly.

He is a time bomb that explodes in your heart every time he touches you. So you keep doing it.

“Fuck,” you whisper against his lips. 

“Yeah…I know. I’m not worthy.”

And yet, you’re still here.

You let him peel off your every layer of clothing, to leave you naked and vulnerable in front of him. 

You do nothing when he undresses too. Hastily taking off his shirt, fumbling with the button of his jeans, nervous hands and short breaths.

It is like some mind fuck game, intoxicating, dangerous, capable of leaving permanent marks.

He lowers his jeans just enough to free his cock, no boxers. Always ready.

His hands run over your hips and you groan. 

His tongue slides over your neck, his eyes closed, his breath heavy and warm on your skin. 

He makes you cry, but you don't say no.

His lips latch onto your nipple and adrenaline rushes through your veins up into your head, hitting hard like a jackhammer.

You don’t pull back anymore, you push your tit into his mouth so eagerly you feel his teeth closing on your bud and you whine in pleasure. 

His growing erection leaks against your center. You are trapped. Not so much because you are between him and the wall but because you no longer know how to get him out of your head. 

Right now it doesn't matter how much it hurts. 

He slides his hands down your thighs and you know what he wants, without needing to speak. You wrap your legs around his waist. He kneels on the bed with you still clinging to him, you lie back on the soft blankets that smell of you both, arch your back and press against his cock. You folds splayed and dripping for him.

His fingers go up your rib cage, stop under your breasts and grasp there, he draws you back to him and your mouths collide again.

You let his tongue enter. You let the fleeting pleasure of this instant take over all the no's you know you have to say.

There’s no right kind of love here, this room is drowned in angry sex.

Angry at how you can never say no to him, angry at how he makes you feel, angry because you know that no one has ever fucked you the way he did, invading your body with a pleasure so addictive that it makes you sick. Angry because maybe he's right, he can't change. 

You break the kiss and bite on his shoulder, a small act of revenge that really does no harm compared to your bleeding heart. 

Your hands grasp on the golden skin of his back, leaving marks with your nails digging into it, your miserable attempt to leave marks on him in return.

You moan convulsively under his touch, your mouth wide open against his, your tongue desperately seeking him out. 

His hands tighten on your ass, lifting you slightly, his cock slides over your wet opening, a guttural sound comes out of the back of your throat without you being able to hold it back. 

You want him inside you. 

You need him inside you.

And it’s wrong, and desperate. It’s masochistic.

You don’t even care for his jeans’s zip scraping your skin.

The thin line between pain and pleasure is so blurred now.

It’s a pathetic shit show of need and urgency. 

You’d walk away from any other guy but Javier is the person you can never have just for yourself and at the same time he is the only one you want. 

He is the knife and the wound at the same time.  

When he asks “Whose pussy is this?” in his deep groaning voice that fucks directly with your brain, you can only reply “yours.”

Digging your nails deeper, biting more, wailing louder but just pleading with him.

You take his shaft in your hand and rub it against you in blind desperation, wetting it with your juices. 

He groans into your ears while his hand reaches for your nipple and his big strong arm holds you close.

You are sitting on his thighs, your legs crossed behind his back.

His fingers pinch your nipple as you don't stop stroking his big throbbing cock.

Just put it in there. You think. I just need to feel your flesh against mine, inside me, claiming me like the rag doll that I am now. 

Stupid bitch trying to have you when you’re damaged like a shattered glass, when you can bring nothing than heat to my body and freezing ice to my heart. 

“Fuck me,” you groan. 

He pushes against your core, entering you with one deep thrust.

Your pussy is weeping so much it doesn’t even hurt.

You clench on him with all the strength you have, chocking his cock with your walls.

“Fuck,” he growls. “You’re gripping me so hard, baby. There’s nothing you want more than this, huh? Me fucking you raw?” 

“Shut up,” you hiss. 

He starts moving, pumping into you as his hand reaches for your clit, brushing it in circles.

You whine, clinging onto his back, your face hidden in the crook of his neck.

You can’t look him in the eye, you can’t face your own shameful reflection in his pupils, you can’t think of anything else than this pleasure firing your body, your limbs, your mind.

Your pussy never gets the memo when it comes to him. She just clenches, and cries and asks for more.

At the verge of your brink, when you’re so utterly overwhelmed you could swear, you’re about to jump out of your skin, you hear it.

It’s the softest whisper on your skin, so low you barely catch the words, “I love you” 

You cry a single tear that slides down the column of his neck, it could be mistaken for a bead of sweat so easily and Javier doesn’t notice it. But it’s there. You’re crying again.

You come, weeping.

Grasping to him like your last shred of hope.

But there’s no hope anymore.

You know you can’t go on like that.

You cried before. You argued before. It’s all useless.

A devastating orgasm shoots through you, leaving you without defense.

It’s the last thing you want but you need to get it over with. 

You lie on the bed, feeling his last twitches inside you, his cum dripping onto your walls, his cock pressing against that spot that belongs only to him.

He lies down on you, gently crushing you with his weight, his sweaty skin against yours, the smell of your orgasm filling your nostrils.

You’re hopeless and breathless. 

He's still inside you, like he doesn't want to leave. 

You know you have to. 

Eventually he shifts, lying on the other side of the bed muttering, “god, you really are something else.” He takes the pack of cigarettes from the nightstand and lights one, taking a long drag.

“I'm not enough,” you want to scream looking at him through the cloud of smoke enveloping him. “Or maybe you're not, for me.”

When he is about to fall asleep, you get up. You pick up your clothes off the floor and put them on silently.

“Where are you going, gatita?” he grunts. 

Does he think he has solved it? Does he think you will forgive him as you did the other times? 

You don’t reply.

"You only ever tell me the truth when you think I won't hear it,” you type on your phone and send it to him, before coming out of the door without turning your back.

You leave him there, wondering, lost as he makes you feel.

There will be two broken hearts. 

You know he loves you and you love him.

He is convinced that he doesn’t deserve you and pushes you away every time you get close to his soul. 

He knows that you see him clearly; that scares him.

You are tired of fighting for the both of you.

You push the elevator button under the gaze of an unsuspecting policeman who urges, “Where are you going, miss?”

“I'm leaving.”

“Do you need someone to accompany you?” 

“No, thank you.”

“Someone could follow you,” he counters.

“No one knows me, you don't have to worry.”

You wait for the elevator, still hoping to see his ruffled raven hair poking out the door, his voice calling to you, his hand tightening on your wrist. 

None of this happens.

The only ones who will follow you are your ghosts.

Tag list: @baronessvonglitter , @almostempty , @probablyreadinsmut , @thundermartini , @gothcsz , @cas-readsandwrites , @harriedandharassed

Archive tag: @pedrostories

If you want to be added or removed just let me know! Thank you very much for reading❤︎

[butternutt613]

PSA!!! IT IS OKAY TO CHANGE YOUR STORY HALFWAY THROUGH OR TO NOT HAVE IT BE PERFECT!!!

Fanfic writers (myself included) are way too hard on ourselves sometimes. I was chatting with a few amazing creators on Discord about this, and I realized just how much pressure we put on ourselves to make everything perfect.

Let me remind you: it’s completely okay if your story isn’t flawless right out of the gate.

The way I see it, fanfics, and most things posted on AO3 or Wattpad are like first drafts. ESPECIALLY!!!!! when you’re still actively writing your story. You’re still figuring things out, shaping the narrative, and building the world. It’s not set in stone, and it’s okay to make changes as you go. Hell, completely rewrite it!

So many of us get caught up in trying to make our stories perfect from chapter one because we’re scared that if it’s not, no one will read it. I experience imposter syndrome so hard lol

But NEWSFLASH!!! Even published authors don’t create flawless stories from the start. Their first drafts are messy, full of edits, rewrites, and changes. Entire chapters get cut, characters get reworked, and sometimes entire backstories get scrapped. AND THEN!!! EVEN WHEN THEY THINK THEY ARE DONE!!! THEIR EDITORS GIVE THEM 39 THINGS TO CHANGE!!!

If that’s how the ‘pros’ do it, why are we holding ourselves to an impossible standard?

And I’m going to be so real with you right now… 99.99% of the time, the characters we write about aren’t even canon or have never even interacted in canon or only had 2.3 lines of dialog (I'm looking at you, Jegulus….)

That’s the magic of fanfiction. You get to create something ENTIRELY NEW. You get to take these characters and give them experiences and a life the og author never did or never could. Fanfiction is about imagination and creation, not about rigid rules.

There will always, ALWAYS, be someone who says "you're doing it wrong” or “that character wouldn't do that” and I'm sorry to break it to them but idk if you know this but… THEY AREN’T REAL!

If I want these two guy best friends to kiss, I will! If I want my MC to save Anne by perfecting Isadora’s magic, I will! If you want Ominis to say “fuck you” to his family or Sebastian to become a healer or an auror or a potions master, then GODDAMMIT YOU DO THAT!

BECAUSE YOU ARE WRITING YOUR STORY!! It is YOURS, not anyone else's. You’re the author. Your creative process is valid and so is your work, even if you decide to change direction halfway through. (Elsa was originally going to be evil…)

There will always be haters. Even when something is canon, there are people who’ll criticize it (seriously like look at flat earthers….) That’s why you can’t let the fear of criticism hold you back. Write what YOU love. Create what brings YOU joy. The right people will find your work and appreciate it for what it is.

At the end of the day, fanfiction is about expression and connection. Whether you’re writing for an audience of hundreds or just for yourself, it’s yours. You’re building a world, shaping characters, and sharing something that came from your heart. And that’s what makes it meaningful. So stop being so hard on yourself. Keep WRITING. Keep CREATING. KEEP COMING UP WITH FUN HEADCANONS!!!

Your story deserves to be told. And you deserve to have fun and love doing it.

*mic drop* *peace sign*

[mumms-the-word]

I know I’m screaming into the void here but do not witch hunt people with AI accusations

As someone whose job for the last two years involved me reading and rereading essays and creative fiction written by my students (a group of writers notorious for using AI despite being told not to because they worry about their grades more than their skills) let me tell you straight up that detecting AI in any written work isn’t straightforward

AI detection softwares are bullshit. Even Turnitin, which is supposedly the best, has an error rate that is slowly increasing over time. They’re not reliable. The free ones online are even worse, trust me

“Oh but it’s so obvious!” Sure. If you’re trained to notice patterns and predictive repetitions in the language, sure. I can spot a ChatGPT student essay from a mile away. But only if they haven’t edited it themselves, or used a bunch of methods (Grammarly, other AIs, their friends, a “humanizer” software, etc) to obscure the ChatGPT patterns. And it’s easier with formulaic essays—with creative fiction it’s much harder.

Why?

Well because good creative fiction is a) difficult to write well and b) extremely subjective. ChatGPT does have notable patterns for creative writing. But it’s been trained on the writing that is immensely popular, writing that has been produced by humans. Purple prose, odd descriptions, sixteen paragraphs of setting where one or two could be fine, all of that is stylistic choices that people have intentionally made in their writing that ChatGPT is capable of predicting and producing.

What I’m saying is, people just write like that normally. There are stylistic things I do in to writing that other people swear up and down is an AI indicator. But it’s just me writing words from my head

So can we, should we, start witch hunts over AI use in fanfic when we notice these patterns? My answer is no because that’s dangerous.

Listen. I hate AI. I hate the idea of someone stealing my work and feeding it into a machine that will then “improve itself” based on work I put my heart and soul into. If I notice what I think is AI in a work I’ve casually encountered online, I make a face and I stop reading. It’s as simple as that. I don’t drag their name out into the public to start a tomato throwing session because I don’t know their story (hell they might even be a bot) and because one accusation can suddenly become a deluge

Or a witch hunt, if you will

Because accusing one person of AI and starting a whole ass witch hunt is just begging people to start badly analyzing the content they’re reading out of fear that they’ve been duped. People don’t want to feel the sting or embarrassment of having been tricked. So they’ll start reading more closely. Too closely. They’ll start finding evidence that isn’t really evidence. “This phrase has been used three times in the last ten paragraphs. It must be AI.”

Or, it could be that I just don’t have enough words in my brain that day and didn’t notice the repetition when I was editing.

There’s a term you may be familiar with called a “false positive.” In science or medicine, it’s when something seems to have met the conditions you’re looking for, but in reality isn’t true or real or accurate. Like when you test for the flu and get a positive result when you didn’t have the flu. Or, in this case, when you notice someone writing sentences that appear suspiciously like a ChatGPT constructed sentence and go “oh, yes that must mean it’s ChatGPT then”

(This type of argumentation/conclusion also just uses a whole series of logical fallacies I won’t get into here except to say that if you want to have a civil conversation about AI use in fandom you cannot devolve into hasty generalizations based on bits and parts)

I’m not saying this to protect the people using AI. In an ideal world, people would stop using it and return back to the hard work of making art and literature and so on. But we don’t live in that world right now, and AI is prevalent everywhere. Which means we have to be careful with our accusations and any “evidence” we think we see.

And if we do find AI in fandom spaces, we must be careful with how we handle or approach that, otherwise we will start accusing writers who have never touched AI a day in their life of having used it. We will create a culture of fear around writing and creating that stops creatives from making anything at all. People will become too scared to share their work out of fear they’ll be accused of AI and run off.

I don’t have solutions except to say that in my experience, outright accusing people of AI tends to create an environment of mistrust that isn’t productive for creatives or fans/readers. If you start looking for AI evidence everywhere, you will find it everywhere. Next thing you know, you’re miserable because you feel like you can’t read or enjoy anything.

If you notice what you think is AI in a work, clock it, maybe start a discussion about it, but keep that conversation open to multiple answers or outcomes. You’re not going to stop people from using AI by pointing fingers at them. But you might be able to inspire them to try writing or creating for themselves if you keep the conversation open, friendly, and encourage them to try creating for themselves, without the help of AI

[ariahmichelle]

Phoning It In- Drew Starkey x actress/reader

You sat in the brightly lit Elle magazine studio, a mischievous grin spreading across your face as you reached into the bowl of folded slips of paper.

The Phoning It In segment was straightforward—draw a prank scenario, call one of your friends, and see how they react. You’d already done two ridiculous pranks, but when you unfolded your third prompt, your excitement kicked up a notch.

The slip read: “Say you’ve been asked to go on Love Is Blind and want to put your acting career on hold for it.”

“Oh, this is going to be good,” you said, laughing to the camera. “I’m calling Drew Starkey for this one. He’s going to lose his mind.”

Fans loved speculating about you and Drew. Your friendship had been under scrutiny for months, with fans pointing out how close you were off-screen. You’d both laughed it off in interviews, but recently, your feelings for Drew had started to shift. You’d been noticing his laugh a little more, catching yourself smiling at his texts for longer than usual. So this prank? It was the perfect opportunity to see how he’d react.

You dialed his number, nerves bubbling in your chest. After a few rings, Drew picked up.

“Hey, you,” he said, his voice warm and familiar. “What’s up?

“Hey, Drew. Um… I need to talk to you about something,” you said, trying to sound hesitant.

“Oh no. This sounds serious. Did you finally get banned from craft services?”

“Drew, I’m being serious,” you said, injecting some urgency into your voice, while trying to contain your laughter.

“I just… I’ve been offered this opportunity, and I wanted to get your opinion”

“Okay,” he said cautiously. “What kind of opportunity?”

You took a deep breath, setting the stage. “I’ve been asked to go on Love Is Blind.”

There was a beat of silence before Drew burst out laughing. “Wait, wait, wait. Love Is Blind? You? Oh, this is rich. Are they doing a celebrity edition or something?”

“No, it’s the regular one,” you said, feigning seriousness. “They reached out to me, and I think it’s a sign. I mean, I’ve been so focused on my career—maybe it’s time I try something new, you know? Like, find my soulmate.”

“Your soulmate? Through a pod?!” Drew was cackling now, but when you didn’t laugh along, he hesitated. “Wait… are you serious?”

“Yes, Drew!” you said, trying to sound exasperated. “I think this could be really good for me. But it means I’d have to take a break from Outer Banks for a while.”

“No. Nope. Absolutely not,” Drew said firmly, his tone more serious now. “You can’t leave Outer Banks. Are you kidding me?”

“Why not?” you asked, pretending to sound defensive.

“Because, for one, you’re too talented to leave all of this behind for some reality show. And two…” He paused, his voice softening. “The show would be awful without you. Like, genuinely terrible. And if you’re gone, who’s going to keep me sane on set?”

“I’m sure you’d manage,” you said, fighting to keep a straight face.

“No, I wouldn’t,” Drew said, his voice growing more animated. “Okay, you know what? If it comes down to this, I’ll just marry you myself. Problem solved. No pods, no weird dates, and Outer Banks keeps you. Win-win.”

Your breath caught at his words. “What?”

“I’m serious,” Drew said, laughing but also sounding genuine. “If that’s what it takes to keep you from leaving, I’ll do it. You’re not leaving, alright? End of discussion.”

For a moment you have to mute yourself to let out a laugh while Drew continues to rant but then there’s a second of silence on the end of the line and the tone of his voice shifted slightly, quieter now. “I mean… I don’t want you to leave. I don’t think I could do this without you. Not just the show, but… everything.”

Your heart raced as Drew trailed off, his words heavy with something unspoken. You weren’t sure what’s happening but you definitely didnt want it caught on camera so you quickly unmute yourself and let out an exaggerated laugh, cutting through the tension. “Drew, oh my God! It’s a prank!”

“What?” he asked, clearly thrown off.

“I’m filming a segment for Elle,” you explained, laughing as you tried to compose yourself. “I had to prank-call someone, and you were the perfect target.”

“Are you kidding me?” Drew groaned, though you could hear him laughing on the other end. “You’re unbelievable. I just fake-proposed to you. You realize that, right?”

“Oh, I realize,” you teased. “And I’m definitely not letting you live it down.”

You’re evil,” Drew said, laughing along with you, though you could hear the tension still lingering beneath his words. “You seriously had me going. I was about to start drafting a petition to keep you on Outer Banks.”

“Well, I’m not going anywhere,” you reassured him, your voice light. “But thanks for the marriage proposal. I’ll keep that in mind if I ever decide to quit acting for real.”

“Yeah, yeah,” he said, his tone playful again. “Remind me to prank you back when you least expect it.”

When the call ended, you turned to the camera with a big smile. “And that, ladies and gentlemen, is how you successfully prank Drew Starkey. Bonus points for the fake marriage proposal.”

Later that evening, as you were heading home, your phone buzzed with a text from Drew.

Alright, you got me good. But seriously, don’t scare me like that again. I’d miss you too much. 😅 Also, come over later? I wanna talk about something.

Your heart skipped a beat as you stared at the message. Whatever Drew wanted to talk about, you had a feeling it wasn’t just about the prank.

——————————

Let me know what u think? Requests are also open, check who I write for before requesting! 💗

[rainerioun]

WHAT'S HAPPENING IN 2025? | pick a card.

— It's been quite a while since I’ve shared a reading, and I want to apologize for that. I’ve been dealing with a lack of motivation and a busy schedule, but I’m feeling better now and eager to share more! I’m still working on a "pick a card" reading that someone requested—it’s on the way. Wishing you all a wonderful 2025, thank you!

HOW TO CHOOSE A PILE : The outcome may vary based on whether you receive clear messages visually or intuitively. If you resonate more with selecting a pile visually, trust that inclination. Personally, I believe the notion that 'looks can deceive,' so I prefer to take a deep breath and close my eyes, allowing the pile I'm meant to connect with to come to me. You might see the color of the pile, sense or hear a number, or simply feel its overall vibe.

Please don’t redistribute or edit my content.

MUST READ + MASTERLIST. | KO-FI.

PILE ONE

What's Happening In 2025? Five of Swords, Ten of Swords, Six of Pentacles [Reversed].

This new year will teach you what it feels like to face disappointment, but also how to accept it, grow from it, and pursue something better. You may have stepped into 2025 already carrying a sense of failure or conflict in some way. This year is all about focusing on yourself and finding ways to truly support your well-being—not out of obligation, but because you want to. Let go of one-sided dynamics; there’s no need to hold onto imbalances, even if they seem harmless right now. This is your time to reclaim balance and prioritize what you deserve.

Extra! - The Garden and the Gate : Abundant Prosperity, Staying Safe. - Alchemist : Transformation of base motives and goals into golden wisdom. - Saboteur : Highlights your fear of self-empowerment and the changes it would bring into your life.

Every year has felt the same because of your fear of the unknown. What would really happen if you made even a small change? You have the resources—and perhaps even the desire—to explore and follow the path meant for you, but you’ve grown too comfortable where you are. Don’t hold yourself back. It’s time to shift your motives and reignite your drive. That’s how you’ll achieve your true goals. The time for change is now—let go of self-sabotaging tendencies.

PILE TWO

What's Happening In 2025? Ace of Swords [Reversed], King of Wands, Ten of Cups.

In 2025, it's time to step into a "king role" and take charge of your life. Embrace leadership, not just in practical matters but in shaping the bigger picture of your journey. You’ll have a greater purpose to work toward, which might shake things up or even draw judgment from others. But remember, this process is about achieving clarity—both within yourself and in your external world.

When these challenges come your way, rise to the occasion with confidence and boldness. By doing so, you'll attract more stable, lasting relationships—both romantic and platonic—that align with this new phase of your life. Everything will begin to fall into place.

For some, existing relationships may deepen and progress to the next level. For others, new opportunities to connect with the right person may arise. Ultimately, this year is about building a foundation of stability and security in every area of your life.

Extra! - Hostilities : Defenses Up, Aggressive Energy. - The World : Expansion, Opening Up. - The Temple Path : Spiritual Purpose and Support. - Shape-Shifter : Skill at navigating through different levels of consciousness. Ability to see the potential in everything. - Priest : Facilitates spiritual commitments. Serves as a channel for spiritual energy.

A lot of cards came out for this message, reinforcing the idea of standing in your power and holding your ground when faced with challenges or questions. This isn’t the time to fall into people-pleasing, stay true to yourself and your values.

There’s a sense of expansion—this could manifest in your career, relationships, online presence, or general resources. However, a key message I heard is that your location might change. You could be moving to a new place, possibly even returning to your roots or closer to where you or your family originally come from. This shift will bring growth and help ground you in the process.

Everything unfolding now is part of a greater journey. To grow stronger, pay attention to life’s lessons. Whether you lean toward spirituality, religion, or simply what brings you joy, embrace what uplifts you this year. This could also mean leaning on your support system—those people whose wisdom and presence help guide you forward. Let their insights become a part of your strength.

PILE THREE

SENSITIVE TOPICS BELOW ! ↴

What's Happening In 2025? Queen of Swords, Nine of Swords [Reversed], The Devil.

Take this as an opportunity to care for yourself, to treat yourself with love and compassion, as well as believe in the process.

You may need to confront some inner struggles—fear, worry, or unresolved pain—but know that facing these emotions is part of healing. It's crucial to remember that seeking help is not a sign of weakness, or shame. On the contrary, it is an act of courage. Reaching out for support, whether from professionals, loved ones, or trusted resources, can provide clarity and guidance. Honest communication and a willingness to face the truth—however difficult—are vital steps in your journey.

At times, you may feel held back by attachment to an older version of yourself or by habits that no longer serve you. Letting go of this attachment is not easy, but it is necessary. You should not depend on the past or allow it to dictate your future. Progress comes when you take the steps yourself; no one else can do it for you. With effort and perseverance, you will leave behind desperation, rediscover your strength, and find a sense of calm and fulfillment within. Trust in your ability to move forward.

Extra! - Patience : Peaceful Presence, Letting Go of Desperation. - Man Holding A Heart : Male Dealing with Family, Love, or Emotions. - Queen : Radiates the regal feminine. Uses her benevolent authority to protect others. - Child — Magical : Seeing the potential sacred beauty in all things. The belief that everything is possible.

Again, you will find peace—trust in yourself and your ability to get there. Along this journey, a masculine figure in your life, whether romantic or not, may play a significant role in supporting and guiding you. This could be someone new entering your life or someone you already know who steps up.

If this doesn’t resonate, it could reflect your own growth—embracing both emotional and physical strength while balancing qualities often labeled as masculine or feminine. (Stereotypes aside, it’s about finding harmony within yourself.)

As you heal and learn to love yourself fully, this transformation will radiate outward, inspiring and uplifting those around you. I love you!

[pepstarvanmoon]

Someone please get El out of there

Is it not obvious what this is? Do you really not know what you should be doing? SAY THE DAMN WORDS.

Why do you think she’s doubting you? Can you really not tell?

Mike, sweetheart, your relationship balancing skills are a terror to your friends, family, and romantic partners.

This is why people found Midleven cuter in S1/2, because the day you made it official marked the beginning of El’s doubts in your feelings for her.

You cannot seem to grasp that El is your friend AND your girlfriend, and somehow treating El like a girlfriend equates to treating her like shit.

You cannot make this up. El needs WORDS because Mike’s ACTIONS actively make her feel unloved. She does not feel it, so she wants some kind of verbal/written affirmation because of how emotionally distant Mike feels.

(someone talented please edit Elmike to Hamilton’s Burn or send an existing edit my way, thank you ♡)

His actions do not align to her expectations of love, not that it’s a good idea to let TV define romance for you, but you’re allowed to want/expect certain things in a relationship, and El isn’t getting that.

And let’s not act like Mike isn’t good at making people feel loved/cared for. Will is in love with him for a reason. El loves him for a reason.

(It was difficult to pick scenes for this because I’ve read arguments for how these aren’t really romantic at all, but from 12/13-year old, “fresh out the lab” Eleven, it’s as romantic as romance gets imo)

El has been trying to convince herself that their relationship is better than it is, because once she admits to herself that it’s not working, what does she do?

Her day-to-day life isn’t that great. Sure, she has her new family in the Byers, but her dad recently passed away and she’s being bullied at school. She has no friends outside of Will, and while I’m sure their relationship is great (wasn’t explored that much tbh), he can’t keep her from feeling isolated, and his own trauma with bullying keeps him from standing up for her.

One good, unchanging thing she has is her relationship with Mike. He’s the one who took her in and housed her, he taught her what it meant to be a friend, and… I’m having a bit of trouble here lol. I was going to say:

Never used her for her powers (not true lol)

When she was burnt out, he never expected more from her (not true LOL)

Never treated her differently for her powers (for this one, he found her awesome in an awestruck way rather than a Brenner “I’m gonna exploit this” way, but when he thought she lied about Will/hurt Lucas he was on her ass lmao)

My girl has those ‘first love’ blinders on. I keep having to ask myself what she sees in him besides ‘first person to accept me + we kissed’ like besides the latter, Dustin was right there. A lot of the parts of Mike I enjoy don’t reveal themselves around El outside S1 (barely S2). He’s shown as caring and protective, but he’s like that for all of his friends?? Especially when they’re in danger so idk what’s different. I’d have to peruse the milkvan tag to get a hint, but I’ll probably get a better idea watching Sleeping Beauty.

I’m a firm believer that Mike kept it ambiguous because he didn’t want to admit what the real problem was to Will.

“I couldn’t tell El that I love her.” - simple as that. Must be something about Will that has him holding his tongue because after S3 I doubt he’d have that much trouble telling Lucas.

Are you embarrassed? If you thought it wasn’t that serious you wouldn’t have told Will that it was something you “can’t come back from”. Is love serious to you, Mike? Because you can’t love El in the way she wants, do you think you’re incapable of it? Do you feel wrong? Do you not want Will to know?

Hit a little too close to home, huh.

(and let’s not get into the "team, friends, best friends" scene they had together like what was the point in having them make contact a SECOND time.

They already established a connection between them. Mike could’ve asked to be a team after the "guess it's gonna be up to us again," and Will could’ve taken the painting offscreen (the focus shot of Will grabbing the painting gets me so bad like WHY), but instead they wanted them to blush and giggle over each other AGAIN before they got to the van.

Make it make non-Byler sense I'm begging.)

You’d think that’d be good enough, but Mike still feels conflicted and has to make it Will’s problem (actually, Will kinda made it his problem. The way they shot the triple take makes it seem like Will dragged Mike away for another talk because of how spacey he was being. Who knows.)

Tf do you mean you didn’t know what to say? “Maybe if I said that thing” so you DO know? It’s painfully cut and dry if you take emotions out of it. El wants Mike to say that he loves her, so to fix this, to come back from that fight, Mike has to say he loves her.

Why is it such an internal battle for him? If I were to take it at face value, I’d chalk it up to what he said in the van scene.

So your solution is to push your relationship to a point that has El crying and throwing all the loveless letters you sent to the floor? To tell her that she’s incredible and a superhero and that she should know how you feel about her because, despite the tears streaming down her face and her DIRECTLY asking you if you still love her, she must know how amazing she is too?

NEWSFLASH, Queerler! She’s learning just how much she doesn’t need you right now, so I guess it’s time to face your fears!

This isn’t what I meant, but go off ig (don’t, actually, this is awful for everyone involved).

No way you expect El to buy this. You’ve expressed this fear of "losing El" to Will, I’ll give you that, but nothing you’ve done IN FRONT OF EL has conveyed this. Your letters weren’t helping, and you being there in person only made it worse.

Eagerly awaiting the day Michael Wheeler stops lying.

Well, I guess he doesn’t lie ALL the time.

[myrrusstuff]

Streamer!Jinx Headcanons!

Just some basic ideas and drabbles pooled into one post. I see a lot of streamer!ellie and streamer!vi, but barely any jinx if any at all. I don’t know, I just think she’d be the funniest streamer ever.

CW: Cursing? bits of Jinx x f!reader. jokes about jinx being cancelled, homophobia mentions.

Streamer!Jinx who got surprised when she blew up pretty fast. For the wrong reasons, Ofcourse (controversy, because she can’t keep her mouth shut), but once it smoothed over she gained a lot of following

She has no filter. None. The second something pops into her head, she says it aloud. She deals with the consequences afterwards.

Her room is either really messy, or oddly tidy. On that note, Streamer!Jinx that decorated her whole setup and desk, plus her headphones. They’re all covered in scribbles and spraypaint.

Streamer!Jinx that sometimes manages to convince you to play on stream with her, addressing you as a close friend to keep you both comfortable and safe online.

She constantly says “chat” and “gang”, even when she’s not streaming. Vi and Ekko pick up on it and comment on it frequently, using it to tease her.

Rages at Minecraft. 100%. She joined MCC, just to ragequit half way through because her team was in dead last. Her chat watched her leave the server and walk out of her room on the webcam. She had to take a whole 15 minuet break and come back with a cup of coffee to calm down.

She would start a Minecraft hardcore series just to hide in a hole as soon as it turns night, before logging off and never returning.

"Guys this is my first episode of... MINECRAFT HARDCORE!

…

Chat this seems to be my first AND last episode."

Jinx who accidentally revealed your relationship on live. She slipped up and called you "darling" or "babe", and her chat never dropped it.

"BABE?!"

"Holy shit did she just call her babe?"

"Ladies, we have a chance!"

"DID WE HEAR THAT RIGHT"

She tried to change the topic, "We’re going to win this round!", to say she lost, and her chat didn’t drop the topic, would be an understatement.

She got cancelled for homophobia once, because she went on a 'just chill and talk' live about how she didn’t approve of Caitlyn and Vi being together. It got taken the wrong way and had to explain that she’s infact Queer with a girlfriend. She defended herself with "Guys, I’m literally dating.." after she revealed your relationship, and then went on a rant sesh about you. She’s the biggest yapper ever.

Her twitch account got banned or suspended once because she got so mad at a kid on Fortnite that she cursed him out and went overboard. (Again, she has no filter).

She mainly plays Minecraft and gun games. But sometimes she’ll do longer lives for charity where she’ll play the chat’s top pick.

She accidentally showed your face on stream once, forgetting to tell you her webcam was on. You didn’t realise until later that day there were edits of you on your own fyp or twitter TL. "Babe, you might wanna see this.."

Jinx still gets confused whenever she sees an edit of herself. Also, she has a public favourite folder of edits of you. She doesn’t know how to edit it to make it private.

Once you got comfortable showing your face on webcam, Jinx hosted a “do my hair and Q&A” stream where you braided and brushed her hair while you both answered questions. Any excuse to spend time with you at the same time as working.

Notes: first time ever writing jinx, so I thought I’d start with headcanons. Do we want a streamer!jinx fic? Like an actual fic? Pls give me ideas on what to write abt her. This was re uploaded from my old blog @myrruwrites.

[lilgarbitch]

The Voice of an Angel- Matt Dierkes

Part One

Pairing: Matt Dierkes x PornBlog!Reader

Cw: Smut, Masterbation (f and m), sappy freak!Matt

Word Count: 3.5k

Author’s Note: Doing something a little different. The story seemed to work best if I wrote time in phases, so I hope it doesn’t ruin it😬 And I couldn’t tell you where this idea came from. I honestly don’t know if I’ve ever seen someone write something like this, but I did the best I could❤️ I hope you enjoy

Tags: @xmads-omensx @dontwantthemoney @theanarchymuse95 @badomensgoodomens

Y/N | Wednesday 2:36 PM

Kicking off the floor and rolling my chair over to my computer, I plug my phone into the cord and begin transferring the audio file. I should really get a microphone for this, but I’m still somewhat new to this… Yeah, I definitely need to start doing research on vamping up my equipment.

I plug my headphones into the laptop once the file was finished so I could listen back over the audio, making sure it’s suitable to be posted. I live alone, and literally just made all of these noises out loud, but I still get a little weirded out playing it without headphones and need to be able to listen to every detail, making sure there were no weird noises in the background.

Clicking on the file, my voice starts playing through. It took some time for me to get used to hearing me say certain things and make these noises, hell, it took me a good while to even hit ‘record’ when doing this, but once I got enough praise from people online, it just became routine. 

My slightly over exaggerated moans and whimpers fill my ears, and I can’t lie, I was pleased with the quality. IPhones have good microphones. It sometimes even picked up the sound of my vibrator or how wet I was based on how close I had the mic to me, and my followers always enjoy that.

After spending about twenty minutes editing out small distracting background noises, I opened Twitter and connected the file to a post, captioning it, "You know exactly how to pull these pretty sounds from me,” before hitting post and then proceeding to do the same for my tumblr blog. 

Almost instantly, my phone starts going crazy from those who have my post notifications on, and I read every comment with a smile on my face.

It may seem weird to many people, but I truly enjoy doing this. I get to turn a common activity into a side hustle, and it pleases both guys and girls when they find my pages. And most of them are the sweetest when they reply. They’re usually all horny replies, but unless I post something that instigates them to degrade me, they always choose to be super sweet.

I scroll through some replies and the likes from my followers, and even some who always come back but choose not to follow me because they don’t want others to know. It was nice seeing repeated faces. Like I created a space for them to feel safe to be open about something so lewd. 

That’s when I got a notification from my Cash App that’s linked to my accounts, causing a small smile to form on my face when reading the name. ThotxPleaser had been a loyal follower for a while now. He’s following my Twitter, Tumblr, subscribed to my Patreon, and here he is again, sending me a gift. 

ThotxPleaser- $250

Sounded beautiful as always, Angel❤️ 

I really wished that his gift had caused a bigger smile, but I knew this anonymous person’s actions too well by now. He usually gave me a sweet nickname, but today he just used my pseudonym, Angel, and it wouldn’t be worrying, if he also didn’t send the donation right after I posted, again. He always tried to send appreciation ‘when he had the chance,’ even commenting that he was too busy sometimes and felt bad for seeing my posts so late, so it was abnormal that he was so on top of it for the third post in a row, almost as if he was waiting for my posts as a pick-me-up. I know that was cocky thinking, but he’s said before that my posts have made his day, giving me a grateful gift to prove it, so it wasn’t that far off of an assumption. I just hope he’s doing okay.

Matt | Wednesday 2:59 PM

I crash into my bed with a groan. We’re getting everything situated for tour next week and I’ve been working my ass off doing almost all the work. The boys and our team do the best that they can, but I’m the one they run to when problems surface, and with the dates coming faster and faster, everyone is running rampant with anxiety and constantly on my ass needing help with the most obvious things. I know we’re all stressed but every part of my job other than actually getting them on that tour bus is done. 

I told them all to give me at least the rest of the day off to unwind. Any problems that come to head today can easily be fixed tomorrow. I warned them that I was switching my phone to Do Not Disturb so even if they tried to contact me, I won’t answer.

It was a lie, though. I would never actually do that to them and hopefully they know that. I just need them to understand and leave me be for at least a few hours before I burn out. And, of course, almost right as I thought that, my phone went off. 

With a loud groan, I turned my phone over and glared at it, trying to read what the hell the problem was now, but then my heart skipped as I read the notification. 

Angel💋 

You know exactly how to pull these pretty sounds from me

My breath hitched as I read it and I instantly felt blood rush to my other head. This had to mean that she finally posted a new audio clip. I instantly clicked on it, desperately needing to hear her to put me in a better mood. My fingers eagerly tap at the back of my phone as it takes a minute to load up Twitter, but when it finally does, I see the audio file and click ‘play’. 

I shove my face into my pillow and place my phone next to my head as I let her voice and moans fill my ears. As the audio plays, I can feel myself getting harder. But I am too fucking tired to do anything about that right now. I truly just needed to hear her sweet voice in a time like this. I could listen to her for hours. It doesn’t matter if it’s her talking dirty or making these sweet noises. Hell, she could start a damn podcast and talk about the weather and it would still make my day. Something about her voice always brought me out of any rut that I’m in. 

The audio ends and I finally look back at my phone. I debated on playing it again, just to hear her, but I figured it wouldn’t hurt to show her some gratitude and appreciation. 

I open up Cash App, using the account that wasn’t under my real name, and send her a simple note. I didn’t have enough energy to put too much thought into it, but she deserved something after boosting my mood. After I sent it, I closed my phone and shoved my face back into my pillow, this time with a small smile. Within minutes, I was out like a light, dreaming of what she could possibly look like, and having a chance to actually have her speak to me, just to be able to hear more of her voice. 

Y/N | Saturday 6:23 PM

It’s been a few days since the last donation from ThotxPleaser. I try to post a few suggestive posts a day if I’m in the mood, and every single one was instantly liked by him, but that was it. No flirty comments, just what seemed like he was already on his phone when I posted and a simple like. I know I shouldn’t worry about a random follower, but he has always been so sweet and supportive. Plus, as creepy as it may seem, I end up paying close attention to my supporters, and it was obvious that he was acting different than usual. 

I tried pushing the worry out of my mind the best I could, not needing to stress over a damn audio blog supporter, but I couldn’t help the fact that my mind wandered, thinking of what could possibly be happening in his life that he was too busy to show his usual appreciation, but still forcing him to be one of the first likes on every single post, audio or not. What could he possibly be dealing with that made him seem like he was so busy that he barely had time to do much, yet he still went out of his way to give me a hint of support? Fuck, I’m sounding insane. Am I overthinking this so much that I truly believe this man was using my moaning audios and lewd posts as his main form of serotonin? God, I need to fix my ego. He’s probably just losing interest and slowly weaning me off his attention…Okay, Y/N, he’s a fucking follower. He doesn’t care about ghosting you. You’ve never even spoken. Why are you so obsessed anyway?

I let out a groan, getting annoyed with my own thoughts. I realized that I was staring at the ceiling, worrying about someone I don't even know, so I quickly sat up and grabbed my phone, hoping that doom scrolling could help distract me…and make me feel less embarrassed.

I open Instagram and my eyes instantly land on the story bar. I scroll through the orange and green circles, hoping to find someone interesting, when I finally do. Matt Dierkes had a new story. I click on it and instantly giggle, seeing that, of course, it was another raccoon meme. Since this was my personal account, I liked his story and went on with doom scrolling.

After seeing only reposted memes and people living their best life, I realized this wasn’t going to give me the entertainment I needed. I close the app and look at my others, before opening Tumblr. Matt was still on my mind. I always found him so cute. I’ve enjoyed Bad Omens’ music for a while now, and definitely found the boys attractive, but something about their tour manager had always caught my eye. He said whatever he wanted and enjoyed things without judgment. I really liked how unique and undeniably him he let himself be.

I try to scroll through my feed, but with him still in my mind, my fingers trailed over to the search bar and I found myself looking up another fanfiction about him. 

After a few…okay maybe a little too many one shots and short stories since I was free tonight, I landed a quite…spicy story, leading me to decide this was the perfect time to create more content. 

With the story playing in my mind like a movie, I set my phone up and hit record. I was too lazy to grab a toy, and was definitely worked up enough that I could easily get this done manual style. Lying back, I slipped my hand down my pants with his face flashing behind my eyes. In the story, he had a little more dominant energy, so I began imagining him taking what he wanted.

My breath picked up as I felt his hands sliding up my thighs, using enough pressure to keep them held to the sides. He had this almost hungry look on his face as I stared down at him. His fingers finally reached the hem of my panties before powerfully yet gracefully sliding them down, like he was teasing me, making me wait. 

I could feel his warm calloused fingers grazing over the softness of my thighs as they trailed towards my core. I began to squirm in anticipation, desperately wanting to grab them and bring them where I needed him most, but I knew if I did, he’d find a way to punish me. 

Finally his hand reached the apex of my thighs and I gasped as he grazed his fingers through my folds. 

I’m getting too desperate, I have to get this little fantasy sped up. I start circling my clit and letting out a soft whine. 

His tongue passes through my slit before finally focusing on the bundle of nerves. My breath picks up as he perfectly laps at it, occasionally circling it with his tongue. As he adds more pressure, I can feel myself getting closer. I look down and see his face between my thighs, causing a small gasp to escape my lips. Once our eyes meet, I let out a breathy moan as my head falls back against the pillow. I can’t control the noises leaving me, the sound of his tongue lapping at my wet core and the image burned into my mind of him staring up at me causing the pleasure to intensify.

As I reached my peak, my mind overwhelmed with ecstasy, I forgot where I was. 

“Ma-“ I let out, before quickly gasping and covering my mouth, hoping I could play that off as a gasp of pleasure and not shock at me almost ruining my audio by saying his name. After catching my breath, I stop the recording and sit there. 

Fuck.

Matt | Saturday 9:47 PM

The guys and I were hanging out at Noah and Jesse’s house, telling ourselves that we needed a night off to relax and leave the stress behind for a few hours. Everyone’s mostly packed and we have at least tonight to just forget about everything, so they were all a few beers and shots in and it was getting kind of rowdy. I made sure to keep my eye on everyone to make sure they didn’t do something stupid. 

I was sitting on the couch as the rest of them either destroyed the kitchen, trying to drunkenly make snacks, or hung out in the backyard, just chatting or getting excited over revisiting places on the tour they enjoyed. I was silently watching them all, using this time to try and force some relaxation into my mind, knowing we agreed that we could take a break from work. I know I could have done this at home, but doing anything with these boys was better than doing it alone, since I could always end up hunched over in laughter at any moment.

I stare off, listening to them loudly argue over which cheese to put in a grilled cheese, and just let my mind wander over how life has been going lately. Thinking about what still needs to be done and what fun things I could try to do before I was slaving away for 3 months on tour, since even when I tried my hardest, I couldn’t push the thought of work away. But then I was pulled out of my thoughts by my phone vibrating in my pocket. I pulled it out and saw that Angel had posted a new audio. God, this is exactly what I needed right now. A small smile formed on my lips, but I quickly went back to a straight face, not wanting anyone to see and question who made me smile or find out that it was a goddamn porn blog. 

I glanced around the room, making sure that everyone’s attention was occupied, before sneaking my way off to the bathroom. I close and lock the door behind me and pull out my Airpods. I know the house was loud, but the thought of them hearing her voice coming from the bathroom was not something I wanted to deal with. 

I put an Airpod in and click on the notification. Once it loaded, I pressed play on the audio. It was a short one, but it was definitely enough to put me in a better mood. Instantly, her sweet sounds filled my ear. Soft airy moans played through my Airpod and I could feel myself growing in my pants. I debated whether it was weirder to jerk off in their bathroom or to leave the bathroom with a hard on, and decided on the latter. 

As her voice played through my headphones like a beautiful melody, I reached my hands down and pulled the waistbands of my shorts and boxers down, letting my growing cock spring free. I turned my hat around, pushing my hair back to keep it out of my face as I leaned my hips against the sink and gripping the edge with one hand. I wrapped my other hand around the base and firmly gripped it. 

She let out soft whimpers with an occasional ‘Fuck’ and I leaned down and let a trail of spit reach my tip, biting back a groan as I collected it and used it to slicken my movements. It was just the perfect amount of lubrication to move at the pace I needed without making any noise. 

I brought my shirt to my teeth and closed my eyes, biting down as I fought back the noises collecting in my throat. I was close to biting through my lip and I didn’t need to get a noticeable mess on my nice tee. Explaining the teeth marks in the fabric would be easy, if their drunken asses even noticed. Her breath picked up, a telltale sign she was close, and that itself caused a tightening in my stomach. I listened to her moans getting higher and higher, subconsciously pumping myself to the beats of her breath. But then, she let out a moan I had never heard before. They were usually whiney and breathless, but this time she used her full chest voice, moaning out a ‘Maa-‘ before gasping and finally letting out her usual whiney sinful moan as she came. 

Something in my brain took that personal. It sounded too close to her moaning my name for me to prepare for the instant rush of pleasure taking over my body. I quickly cupped a hand over my tip as my eyes rolled back, my mind replaying that single sinful syllable over and over as I spilled into my fist. 

I probably bit a hole in my shirt with how hard my teeth clenched as I forced the deep loud moan from coming out. But I didn’t care. I had to hold my weight up with the sink behind me and force myself to catch my breath through my nose as the pleasure in my stomach lasted longer than it ever has before. 

After a few moments, the feeling of my cum threatening to drip from my hand caused me to finally open my eyes and drop my shirt from my teeth as I spun around and turned on the sink. I quickly washed all the evidence down the sink and tucked myself back into my pants before looking up.

I stared at myself in the bathroom mirror, grimacing in post-nut clarity as it hit me how gross what I just did was. Not me jerking off to her, that was normal, but the fact that I had gotten so obsessed that I couldn’t wait until I got home to listen and react. 

I hung my head as I thought about how the fuck I was supposed to get through tour if I couldn’t stop myself from listening to her audios, but also definitely wouldn’t have a way to hide my reaction from them. I just wish I could hear her in any way other than something so erotic. That could hold me over. As long as I didn’t pavlov myself into getting hard just at the sound of her. 

I reach up and fix my cap before grabbing my phone and sending her a like and a comment. 

ThotxPleaser- Could never find a better way to make my day, beautiful. 

I softly laughed at myself as I sent it. I knew I was a freak. She probably thought I was a creep the way it looks like I stalk her with how fast I respond to her posts. But I couldn’t care less. She brought me a happiness I couldn’t explain. It wasn’t the context of her posts. It was her. And I had to show my appreciation, even if I just looked like one of many horndogs in her comments and donations. 

Wait…That was it. 

I fumble with my phone to open up Cashapp, before realizing how long I’ve been in the bathroom. I make my way back to the living room as I think of the perfect way to ask. Sitting down, I debate on the most convincing price to get her to even think of helping me out here. Tour starts Tuesday and with us all together, missing a chunk of change won’t be a problem. I go back and forth in my thoughts for a few minutes, writing and rewriting my message until I think it’s perfect. Finally, I send it and cross my fingers. 

ThotxPleaser- $1,000

All I want is to hear your voice more. Talk about your day, how the weather is treating you, or rant about a TV show you’re watching. I’d listen to you forever. All I ask is if you’d be willing to send me voice memos here and there to get me through my days. Name your price, sunshine. 

TO BE CONTINUED

[multifandomwriter126]

Jealousy||Liam Mairi x fem!reader

Smut p in v

Not edited so this probably sucks ass💀

I did post this on my old account that got deleted a while back

“Have you ever thought about telling them how you feel instead of, you know, telling us about it?" Violet said from beside you as if it was obvious. The two of you had stopped your training to ogle at her boyfriend Xaden and his best friend Liam.

“ Um, no, because I don’t want to embarrass myself and I’d rather fangirl over him from a distance.” You countered sarcastically, wincing as Xaden landed a blow to Liam’s ribs.

"That has to hurt," you thought to yourself.

"I’m not sure he’d take me seriously anyway,” you added as Liam stumbled backward, catching himself before falling off the ledge.

Violet rolled her eyes at you. “Don’t be ridiculous,” she said, “You’re beautiful, smart, and fiercely intelligent.” Her words were sweet, but you couldn’t push away the negative thoughts.

"Yeah, well, he’d probably find me annoying. Besides, even if he does like me, I doubt he’d ever make a move.”

Violet sighed, shaking her head. "You shouldn’t speak so negatively about yourself," she scolded. "Xaden sees how great you are, and so does Liam."

Your heart skipped a beat as butterflies fluttered within you. "Wait, your grumpy hater of a boyfriend thinks I’m amazing?" you asked, not daring to get your hopes up.

Violet chuckled and nodded. "Yeah, he does," she confirmed. "He’s always been observant, even when you don’t think he is. And he notices how sweet and good you are for Liam."

Your cheeks flushed at her words. It was one thing for Xaden to think positively of you, but Liam too? The feelings within you grew stronger by the second.

Your heart began racing, but you tried your best to act indifferent at the suggestion. "yeah, and how am I supposed to do that?" you asked, your voice rising a few octaves.

Violet smirked. "There’s always the direct approach," she suggested. “Or," she continued, her smile growing wider, "I have an even better idea." You raised an eyebrow, curiosity piqued. "Oh, yeah?" You inquired, not knowing if you should trust her. "And what might that be?"

She leaned in closer, a wicked glint in her eyes. "Why don’t you and I make him jealous?" Your heart skipped a beat. Making Liam jealous sounded like a dangerous game. “What do you mean?” you asked a mix of excitement and worry coursing through you.

“Well,” Violet explained, “If Liam sees you with other guys, he might realize what he’s been missing and finally make a move.”

You bit your lip, unsure if you should go along with her plan. “But what if that just drives him further away?” you voiced your concern, “I don’t want to lose his friendship completely.”

Violet put her hand on your shoulder, reassuring you. “Trust me, you won’t. Men are competitive by nature. If he sees you giving attention to someone else, it’ll ignite something within him.”

You thought it over for a moment before nodding reluctantly. “Alright,” you conceded, “But if this blows up in my face, you’re the one responsible.”

Violet grinned triumphantly and patted your back. “Don’t worry, everything will go according to plan.”

Over the next few days, you found yourself spending more time with other male cadets. You sat with them during meals, trained with them, and even laughed at their jokes.

Every time Liam was around, you could feel his gaze on you, but you acted as if you didn't notice.

Each time you smiled or laughed with another guy, you could see the flicker of jealousy in Liam’s eyes, just like Violet said.

One night at dinner, you sat with a group of male cadets. They all seemed nice enough, but you couldn’t shake the feeling of Liam’s steely glare from across the room.

As you continued to chat with them, you felt a presence behind you, and a shadow loomed over the table. You turned around to find Liam standing there, the muscles in his jaw clenched. The table grew silent as everyone waited to see what would happen next. You swallowed hard, trying to maintain your composure, but your heart was racing.

Liam leaned down, his face just inches away from your ear. "Can I talk to you?" he asked, his voice gruff. You nodded hesitantly, feeling the intense gaze of everyone at the table.

Liam took your hand and led you away from the group, away from the curious gazes and hushed whispers. He didn't stop walking until he'd taken you far enough away from the others, to a quiet corner of the dining room where you were alone.

Finally, he let go of your hand and turned to face you, his expression serious. "What the hell are you doing?" he asked bluntly.

You feigned innocence, even though deep down you knew exactly what he was talking about. "What do you mean?" you asked, trying to keep your voice even. Liam scoffed and stepped forward, closing the distance between you. "Don’t play coy with me," he said, his voice low. "You've been spending all your time with random guys, laughing and joking with them." You clenched your hands into fists, the mix of emotions inside you growing overwhelming. "And if I have?” you asked, trying to sound defiant. "It's not like you're my boyfriend or anything.”

A flash of hurt crossed Liam's face, but he quickly hid it behind his usual stoic expression. "You're right, I'm not your boyfriend," he said, his voice laced with bitterness. "But that doesn’t mean I like seeing you with other guys." Your heart skipped a beat at his words. So Violet was right, Liam was jealous.

You stared at him, unsure of what to say. Part of you wanted to tell him the truth, that it was all a ploy to make him jealous, but then again, what if he didn’t believe you? What if he thought you were just playing games? As the silence stretched between the two of you, Liam ran a hand through his messy hair, his frustration evident. "Why are you suddenly spending so much time with other guys anyway?" he asked, his eyes never leaving yours.

You swallowed, feeling the weight of his question. You couldn't tell him the truth, not yet. So, you said the first thing that came to mind. "I just wanted some male attention, I guess," you replied nonchalantly, even though your heart was pounding. Liam's gaze darkened at your words, his jaw tightening. "Male attention, huh?" he repeated, his tone laced with sarcasm. "And you couldn't get that from me? You had to go to every other guy?"

You winced at the hurt in his voice, hating that you were causing him pain. But you couldn't back down now. "Yeah, well, it's not like you've ever shown any interest in me," you retorted, "At least the other guys give me attention."

Liam’s eyes narrowed, the hurt in his gaze replaced by anger. "Are you serious right now?" he asked, taking a step forward. "You think I haven't shown any interest in you? Maybe I was just trying to be respectful, not wanting to overstep my bounds." You swallowed hard, the guilt building inside of you. You knew he had a point, but you couldn’t back down now. "How was I supposed to know that?” you challenged. "You never say anything, you keep to yourself all the time. I thought you didn't care."

Liam gritted his teeth. "Just because I'm not always the most outspoken guy doesn't mean I don't care," he snapped. "I care more than you think. But seeing you with all these other guys has been... torture, for lack of better words."

You faltered, the hurt in his voice finally cracking your resolve. You didn't want to hurt him, that was the last thing you wanted.

"So, you… you do care about me?" you asked timidly, barely above a whisper. Liam let out a frustrated sigh, running a hand through his hair again. "Of course, I care about you, you idiot," he snapped. "More than you could ever imagine."

Your heart leaped at his words, a feeling of both relief and confusion washing over you. "Then why didn't you say something sooner?" you asked, your voice laced with a hint of irritation. Liam's shoulders slumped, the anger leaving him. "Because I didn't think you felt the same way," he admitted, his voice quieter now. "I didn't want to risk losing your friendship if things went sour."

Your heart ached at his confession. You were both such idiots, dancing around each other for so long.

"Liam," you said softly, stepping closer to him. "I've been spending time with other guys because I wanted to make you jealous. I wanted to see if you cared.”

Liam's eyes widened in surprise. "You... you did that on purpose?" he asked, his voice a mixture of shock and resignation. You nodded, feeling a sense of relief now that the truth was out. "I know it was a dumb move," you admitted, "but I didn't know how else to get your attention. I was tired of waiting for you to make a move if you ever would at all."

Liam let out a huff of frustration. "You’re a goddamn idiot, you know that?" he said, a hint of humor in his voice.

He stepped closer to you, his eyes locked on yours. "If you wanted my attention, you could have just asked." Your heart fluttered as he closed the gap between you. "Yeah, well, you could have said something too," you retorted, not wanting to give up your stance completely.

Liam chuckled, his expression softening. “Fair enough,” he conceded. “But I guess we were both too stubborn to admit how we felt.” You smiled, feeling the tension between the two of you ease.

"So… does this mean you’re not mad at me for being an idiot?" you asked, half joking, half serious. Liam chuckled and shook his head. "I am mad at you," he said, feigning annoyance. "But I guess I can understand why you did what you did.”

He paused for a moment, his expression turning serious. “But I do have one question I’m dying to ask you.”

Your heart skipped a beat. “Yeah? What’s that?” you asked, trying not to show how nervous you were. Liam stepped closer, so close that you could feel the heat radiating off his body. He looked down at you, his eyes smoldering with a mixture of desire and vulnerability.

"I just want to know one thing," he said, his voice low. "Do you have feelings for me? Honest answer, no games." A wave of emotion washed over you as you stared into his intense gaze. You took a deep breath, letting the facade fall away completely.

"Yes," you said without hesitation. "I have feelings for you. Strong ones. I have for a long time." Relief and joy washed over his face. He reached out to touch your face, his hand cradling your cheek. "Good," he whispered, his thumb tracing patterns on your skin. "Because I have feelings for you too. Stronger than you can even imagine." You shivered at his touch, feeling a rush of electricity course through you. "So, what do we do now?" you asked, your voice barely above a whisper. "Are we… Are we together now?" Liam smiled, his eyes never leaving yours. "Yeah," he said, his voice confident. "We're together now. It's about damn time if you ask me." He leaned down, bringing his face closer to yours. "May I?" he asked, his breath warm on your skin.

You nodded, your heart racing in anticipation. “Yes,” you breathed, your voice almost a whisper.

Liam didn’t need any more encouragement. He closed the remaining distance between you, his lips capturing yours in a deep kiss. The world seemed to fall away as you melted into the kiss, the sensation of his lips on yours setting your soul on fire. You wrapped your arms around his neck, pulling him closer, wanting to feel as much of him as you could.

Liam's hands moved to your waist, his fingers digging into your hips. He deepened the kiss, his tongue seeking entrance into your mouth. You granted his silent request, opening your mouth to him. Your bodies pressed against each other, the heat and hunger of the moment taking over completely.

Liam pressed you against the wall, his body trapping you most delightfully. He broke the kiss, his lips trailing down to your neck, nipping and sucking at the sensitive skin there. You let out a gasp, feeling a wave of pleasure coursing through you as Liam continued his assault on your neck. Your fingers tangled in his hair, holding him close, needing more of him.

He continued to kiss and nip at your skin, his hands roaming over your body, exploring every inch. You felt his body pressed against yours, the hard planes of his muscles molding to your curves. Liam's lips returned to yours, his kisses becoming more urgent, more demanding. You met his kisses with equal fervor, your desire for him growing with every passing second.

You felt his hands move under your shirt, his palms exploring your skin with a desperate touch. You shivered at the sensation, arching your back, and letting out a soft moan. Liam grinned into the kiss, his hands splaying across your stomach, sending a shiver through you. "You have no idea how long I've wanted to do this," he whispered against your lips, his voice rough with desire.

He pushed your shirt up, his hands roaming over your bare skin, igniting a trail of fire wherever they touched. You gasped, your body arching into his touch. You wanted, needed more of him. You tugged at his shirt, wanting to feel his skin against yours.

Liam understood your silent request, breaking the kiss long enough to pull his shirt over his head. The sight of his bare chest, the muscles rippling under his skin, made your breath hitch. You reached out, your hands tracing over the ridges of his abs, feeling the heat radiating off of him. Liam let out a small gasp as your fingers explored his body, and he captured your lips in another fiery kiss.

His hands moved back under your shirt, slowly inching it higher and higher up your torso. You broke the kiss, pulling your shirt over your head and tossing it aside, not wanting any barriers between you. Liam's eyes darkened as he took in the sight of you, his gaze roaming over your now-bare skin.

He stepped closer, his body pressed against yours again, his hands roaming over your back, pulling you flush against him. You shivered at the feeling of his skin on yours, the heat from his body seeping into you. You ran your hands over his broad shoulders, relishing the feeling of his muscles flexing under your touch.

Liam's lips found their way back to your neck, his kisses becoming more insistent, his teeth nipping at your skin. His hand moved to your hip, holding you close to him as he continued his assault on your neck. You tilted your head back, giving him more access, feeling his lips and teeth graze your collarbone.

A moan escaped your lips as his other hand moved to your lower back, his touch sending jolts of pleasure through you. Liam's mouth moved to your ear, and his breath was hot as he whispered, "You drive me crazy, you know that?"

He nipped at your ear, his tongue tracing the shell of your ear. You shivered, feeling a wave of heat wash over you, pooling in your core. You grabbed his hips, pulling him closer, wanting to feel more of him against you. You were lost in the sensations he was stirring in you, your mind a haze of pleasure and desire.

Liam's hands roamed over your body, exploring every inch of you, claiming you as his. His body pressed you harder against the wall, his hardness against your thigh making you gasp. You couldn't take it any longer. You needed more, you needed him. You reached down, your fingers seeking the button on his jeans.

Liam pulled back just enough to look at you, his eyes clouded with lust. "Are you sure?" he asked, his voice rough and ragged. You nodded, your body quivering with need. "Yes," you breathed, your voice barely above a whisper. "Please, Liam."

Liam didn't need any more encouragement. He crushed his lips to yours, his kisses searing your skin as his hands fumbled with the button of his jeans. You helped him with the button, your hands shaking slightly with anticipation. You pushed the jeans down his hips, reveling in the feel of his body pressed against yours.

He picked you up, wrapping your legs around his hips. Your back was against the wall, and he held you there with ease.

You could feel his hardness pressing against you, the need in his eyes matching your own. You wrapped your arms around his neck, holding on tightly as he continued to claim your mouth in a frenzied kiss.

Liam stepped out of the jeans, his hands roaming over your body once more, leaving a trail of heat wherever he touched. "I want you," he growled against your lips, his voice guttural with need. "I need you."

He shifted his hips, aligning himself with your core. You gasped as his hardness brushed against your sensitive flesh, Your body arched into him, your mind a haze of pleasure and desire. You wanted, no, needed him inside you, wanted to feel him completely.

Liam groaned as your body pressed against him, his hands gripping your hips tightly. "Are you ready for me?" he asked, his voice low and gruff. You could only nod in response, your body tingling with anticipation. "Please," you breathed, your voice shaky with need. "Please, Liam. I need you."

He didn't need any more encouragement. He shifted his hips, positioning himself at your entrance, his tip teasingly pushing against your core. He held you there for a moment, savoring the feeling of having you so close, so close to where he wanted you most.

Then, with one smooth motion, he entered you, filling you. A cry escaped your lips as he stretched and filled you, your body arching into him.

Liam groaned, his head dropping to your shoulder, his breath hot against your skin. "God," he gasped, his voice ragged. "You feel so Good, so good."

He began to move, his hips rocking against yours, each thrust drawing a moan from your lips. You held onto him tightly, your body molded to his, feeling the heat and energy building between you.

Liam's mouth found yours again, his kiss consuming you, his tongue delving into your mouth. "You're mine," he whispered against your lips. "You're mine, and only mine." You could only nod in agreement, your body lost in the sensations he was stirring in you. Every thrust, every touch, every kiss sent waves of pleasure coursing through you, building and building to a crest you knew was approaching.

Liam's pace quickened, his hips moving more urgently against yours. His hands held you there against the wall, his touch possessive, his need for you overwhelming.

You were both lost in the moment, consumed by the sensations and emotions that were building between you. You felt yourself climbing higher and higher, teetering on the edge of release. Liam was close too, his breaths ragged, his body tensing, his grip on you tight, almost bruising.

He looked into your eyes, his gaze intense and feral. "I'm close," he gasped, his voice strained. "Are you with me, baby?" You nodded your body on the verge of collapse. "Yes," you managed to breathe, your voice wavering. "Yes, I'm close. Please, Liam, don't stop."

Liam didn't stop. He kept his pace, his thrusts deep and powerful as you both approached the edge, the pleasure building and building, Liam's kiss became more urgent, more demanding. His hands gripped you tighter, holding you there as he drove you higher and higher. And then, with a cry, you fell over the edge. Your body convulsed as the release washed over you, wave after wave of pleasure crashing through you Liam followed you into bliss with a deep, guttural groan. His body tensed his grip on you nearly bruising as he found his release.

You both stayed there for a moment, catching your breaths, trying to come back down from the high. Liam's forehead rested against yours, his eyes closed, his breaths coming in ragged gasps. "That was…" he panted, his voice trailing off, unable to find the words. "That was... incredible." You could only nod in agreement, still feeling the aftershocks of pleasure coursing through your body. You leaned your forehead against his chest, feeling his heart pounding against your skin.

Liam wrapped his arms around you, holding you tightly against him, his body still shaking slightly from the intensity of the moment. "You're amazing," he murmured, his lips against your hair. "Amazing." You smiled, feeling a warmth spread through you that had nothing to do with the pleasure you'd just experienced. You felt safe, cared for, treasured.

"You're not so bad yourself," you teased, looking up at him with a smile. Liam chuckled, the sound low and rumbling in his chest. He looked down at you, his eyes soft, his usual cockiness replaced with something gentler, something more vulnerable.

"I think I may have just found my new favorite activity," he said, his lips curving into a lazy grin. "Oh, shut up," you said, rolling your eyes, though you couldn't hide your smile.

Liam chuckled again, his hands coming up to cup your face, his thumbs tracing patterns on your cheeks. "In all seriousness, though," he said, his voice quiet, "that was incredible."

"Agreed," you said, your voice soft. You leaned into his touch, relishing the feeling of his hands on you.

"But," you added, a mischievous gleam in your eye, "we should probably move from the wall before my legs give out entirely." Liam laughed and nodded. He scooped you up easily, carrying you over to the bed and gently laying you down.

He crawled onto the bed, flopping down beside you, his body pressed against yours. "That's much better," he said, slinging an arm around your waist. You both lay there in silence for a moment, the sound of your breathing the only noise in the room. You turned onto your side, curling into him, your head nestled against his chest.

Liam's arms encircled you, pulling you close, his chin resting on top of your head. "I can't believe this is real," he murmured, his voice a whisper.

You could feel the steady thump of his heart under your ear, the rhythm soothing and reassuring. "It is," you replied, your voice just as soft. "I'm here, and I'm not going anywhere." "Good," Liam said, pulling you even closer. "Because you're mine now."

His words were possessive, but there was no denying the tenderness in his voice, the vulnerability behind the bravado. You smiled, feeling a mix of emotions swirling inside you. You were happy, yes, but there was also a hint of anxiety, a worry that this newfound happiness was too good to be true.

But as you lay there, wrapped in Liam's arms, feeling his heart beating steadily beneath your ear, you knew that you wanted this, wanted him, more than anything.

[usagiarchive]

angel of the codeine scene — [06] who i am, who am i?

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sypnosis. [ 1.3k words. no warnings. ] — as the dream gets more vivid, so does your will to discover who you truly are to Xiao.

usagi's note: i didn't attend my class today, so here i edited this early just because hehe, also wdyt aby my new theme (ily clorinde)

You dream of him once again.

Xiao.

And you know it really is him because you hear what he says this time. He talks to you the same way he did when he told you not to leave him again.

It's unfamiliar to you, the tone he speaks in, you don't know it's name, you don't know what to make of it, but you can feel it in the dreams.

And this time, when you wake, you remember bits and pieces of the dream. Some still slip from the net of your mind, but you remember those that linger.

This time it was in a field.

(Xiao was walking beside you, it felt like you were watching a show. You couldn't hear what he was talking about, but the place you're in was familiar.

And you know you've seen this while on patrol with him.

You can see his mouth moving but you can't hear what he's saying.

When he turns to look at you and smiles…

You wake.)

It leaves you more frustrated, being so close to finding out who Xiao really is to you- or rather who you are to him, but the dream remnants keep slipping and you're forced to leave the dream memories.

You have to find answers.

…

Verr sees you at dawn, fully dressed and carrying a satchel of your books and papers.

“Oh, where are you going, sweetheart?”

You halt in place, “The harbor, Miss Verr, I’m going to meet Baizhu-yisheng,”

Her eyebrow raises, “This early?”

“It's an emergency,”

“Wouldn't it be faster with your Adeptus?” she asks, but before she could finish with her question, you were already out of the room.

“Bye, Miss Verr!”

…

See, lying to the woman who took care of you constantly when Xiao wasn't around did make you feel very guilty. But you weren't exactly sure if Xiao would allow you to talk to Ganyu alone.

The past few weeks he has been more present, he eats with you now, asks how your lessons with Baizhu have gone, he keeps you closer during patrols.

After that… kiss (as you've learned from Baizhu, who was very surprised to have learned that Xiao was the one who initiated), he has been somewhat closer to you. More allowing of touch and help.

But he still does not talk much and the dreams get more and more vivid as the time passes.

At the bridge of the harbor, you felt the restrictions Morax had told you about, it was a miracle you even made it this far.

You could see the gold threads in your veins pulsing with light under your sleeves as you fought to walk all the way to Ganyu’s workplace.

Your body and mind keeps telling you you should turn back, return to Xiao, be by his side. But you know you have to get answers.

The dreams are dreams, and as you've told Morax, it has to mean something.

The man of course did not answer your inquiries, only telling you that he'll tell you in due time, sometime soon, he says.

The moment you make it, Madame Ping is there. She urges you to sit as she sees your barely conscious form, as she retrieves Ganyu for you.

The headache feels like you're about to split your head.

…

Ganyu is more than happy to tell you what she knows, but it also leaves you at a dead end.

“We were in different encampments during the war,” she explains, “I stayed with Madam Guizhong, while he stayed with Rex Lapis,”

She puts a finger to her chin as she thinks, “Though I did hear from Indarias that he had a human with him most of time, he became um… what's the term, a bodyguard! Yes, he became a bodyguard for them,”

“Did… did you know anything else about them?”

Ganyu shakes her head, “No, sadly, after that news, the Great War descended rapidly, and I lost contact with Xiao and the other Adepti for a while,”

“The next time we met was when Rex Lapis was hailed as the Geo Archon and we were rebuilding Liyue,”

You stared down at the cup of tea at defeat. The headache was even worse and Ganyu noticed it.

“Hey, are you sure you don't want to take this back to Wangshu Inn?” she asks.

“No, he'll know I'm here if we return,”

“Can't he sense you?”

You shake your head, “No, I learned how to conceal adeptal energy from Morax-shen,”

Her face goes into surprise, “That's… very impressive, wow, not even a millenia old and you've already mastered it?”

She smiles at you, “You're learning well,”

“Thank you,” you smile, then sigh, “I still haven't found out who that human was to him…”

It's Madame Ping that speaks now, “The human was a healer,” she began.

She pours another cup of tea for her and Ganyu as she continues, “The reason he was assigned to them was because healers were the first to be killed off.”

“In a war, it makes sense to do such a thing to ensure brute force and violence would hail victory,”

She places the teapot down, “The Conqueror of Demons fell in love with that human.”

Ganyu shows surprise as everything clicks for you. But it doesn't make sense, if they fell in love with that human, why am I having dreams about their time together?

“She died during the war,” Madame Ping tells you gravely.

“Oh.”

“How cruel,” Ganyu whispers.

A new voice joins the discussion, “After the war, he was assigned to Wangshu Inn as his base of operations,”

“Morax-shen!”

He smiles, “I wasn't informed there was a tea party,” he says as he takes a seat.

You say nothing as you watch him sip on the cup.

“Will you tell me now?”

His eyes flit to you, “I suppose it is time,”

…

He feels the pull of the life bond the moment you're out of the radius.

Why? he keeps asking his mind, Why would you leave? Where would you go? Did you leave on your own or were you taken? Why would you leave him again?

He can't find you, he can't sense you, and he's going insane. Xiao warps to the highest point of Wangshu Inn and desperately tries to find you.

He can feel your anguish, the pulsing of your veins, but he can't sense where you are.

Just come back. Please, just come back.

He can hear his heart thrumming in his chest, his throat tightens, and he- he realises this is exactly how he felt when he couldn't find you.

When he couldn't save you.

“Xiao…” the wind carries your voice to him.

Just like last time.

“...Find me where we last departed…”

What?

…

Morax has told you the truth.

What exactly is wrong with Xiao, but that he has no idea how to treat it, only to temper the symptoms.

Who exactly you are to Xiao, how you were that human from half a century ago, how you died during a camp invasion as they were busy fighting off in the North.

How you were made specifically for Xiao. Not only so that you can heal him, but also because you were his lover.

It made sense. A god wanting his warrior a chance to rest. To live the life he was unable to when he wasin the war.

Rex Lapis was a merciful god.

He tells you where you died.

…

Xiao find you in the same river where you died in his arms.

He stares, not knowing what to do.

Was this punishment? Did he really piss his god off that he was given you and you were to be killed again in front off him? In the same place you were taken from him all those years ago?

Instead he hears you hum a song he has not heard of in a long time.

A song he taught to the past you.

Lover's Oath.

He takes one step forward and the water beneath his feet makes a splash.

You turn.

The breath in his lungs disappates.

“Xiao,” you smile, “I'm back,”

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usagi's note: im so happy i might finish editing the last three parts of this later or sometime over the weekend anyway pls tell me what u thought abt it, and as always take care!! o⁠(⁠(⁠*⁠^⁠▽⁠^⁠*⁠)⁠)⁠o PLEASE NOTICE HOW I WROTE THAT U CALLED HIM XIAO INSTEAD OF XIANSHENG.

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@usagiarchive 2024. do not repost, translate, or use for AI. reblogs, likes, and comments are very appreciated!!

[winchesterwild78]

The Art of Not Saying "I Love You" pt 4

Master List

Characters: Soldier Boy, Ben x Reader, other characters from The Boys

Warnings: some angst, lots of fluff, Ben the ol softy 

A/N: I’ve loved writing this story. Ben always gets a bad rap because of his personality, but I see right through it. He was hurt and betrayed by his father and then the woman he loved. He was tortured for over 40 years, I don’t know about you but I’d be a little pissed too. I love writing soft Ben, because I have a feeling if the right woman came along she could break down those walls, brick by brick. I can see him falling in love and it scaring the hell out of him. 

I hope you’ve enjoyed this story. Thanks for reading it. 

I do not own the rights to the characters in this story. This does not follow The Boys timeline, and is a work of fiction.

All work is my own, please don’t take it or use it without permission. Reblogs and Likes are always welcome.

Written and edited fast, please overlook any errors. 

Minors DNI 18+

Annie looked at me stunned. “You’re what?!” Tears pricked my eyes, “I’m pregnant. Oh Annie, what am I going to do?” 

She pulled me close and wrapped her arms around me. “We will figure it out.” 

I swallowed hard as a lump formed. I knew the baby was Ben’s. Tom always wore a condom and never finished inside me. He always pulled out and finished in the condom. Ben however, was proud of the fact he came inside me. 

I placed a hand on my stomach. I couldn’t believe this was my life. So utterly alone, heartbroken and pregnant. 

I felt the bile rise up in my throat and I ran to the bathroom, emptying the contents of my stomach. 

When I finished I cleaned myself up, brushed my teeth and went back into the living room. 

Annie was texting and my heart sank. “Annie, please don’t say anything to anyone. Even Huey. I don’t want Ben to know.” 

“Oh sweetie, it’s not my place to tell anyone. I was just letting Huey know I was staying the night with you. Y/N, I’m not going to tell you what to do, but I think you should tell Ben. If this is his baby don’t you think he should know. Even if you two aren’t together, don’t you want your baby to have both their parents in their life?” 

“I don’t know what to do, Annie. Can I really raise a baby on my own, do I want to? I was in love with Ben. Hell, I still am. If things were different I’d be over the moon to have a baby with the man I love, but he has made it clear he can’t or won’t have a relationship with me. I can’t risk him hurting this child. If I keep the baby, they will only know they are loved and wanted. I don’t want them growing up thinking they weren’t good enough to be loved by their father.” 

She touched my arm, “Well, whatever you decide I’ll be there with you. This baby will always be loved and taken care of. Right now let’s focus on getting you something to eat and relaxing.” 

I nodded and she pulled me in tightly for a hug. 

“I don’t have much here for food.” “It’s okay. I’ll run to the store since you’re not feeling well and grab some stuff. You stay here and rest.”

I nodded, she hugged me and left. I thought about what she said about Butcher. 

I took a deep breath, swallowing the lump in my throat and hovered over his contact information in my phone. 

I pushed it and bit my lip. One ring and he picked up. 

“Oi, love! Are you okay? Where are you?” 

My voice was soft, “Hey B. I’m okay. I’m so sorry I cut you out. I’ve been dealing with everything. I just needed to get away and clear my head.” 

“I understand, love. Are you coming home?” 

“No, I have a place now. I’m so sorry B.” Then I heard Ben in the background. “Butcher get the fuck off the phone. We have work to do.” 

I gasped at the sound of his voice. It sent a shiver down my spine. My breath hitched. 

“Shut it you fucking cunt. I’m talking to Y/N.” 

“What?! How is she, where is she? Let me talk to her.” 

“No, Butcher. I don’t want to talk to him. Please.” 

“No. She doesn’t want to talk to you.” 

I felt sick. My heart pounded in my chest. Part of me screamed out for him and another part wanted to keep him away. I was so torn. 

“Hey, Butcher. You sound busy. I promise to keep in touch. I love you, B.” 

“Okay, I love you too, Y/N.” 

We hung up and the tears fell. I sat my phone down and it rang almost immediately. 

I looked at the screen and it was Ben. I sat staring at his name. The call ended and he called right back. He was relentless. 

Finally I answered, “Hello, Ben.” 

“Oh my god, Y/N! Thank god you answered. Are you okay? Where are you?” 

“I’m okay Ben. I’m not going to tell you where I am. I need to protect myself from you.” 

He gasped softly, “Please don’t say that, baby. I would never hurt you.” 

I scoffed, “But you did, Ben. You made me fall in love with you and then you pushed me away. How could you do that?” A sob left my lips.

Ben ran his fingers through his hair, “Baby, I didn’t mean to hurt you. You’re everything to me.” “No, Ben. I’m not. If I was you wouldn’t have slept with another woman the day after we made love all weekend.”

He sighed heavily. “Ben, I need to tell you something. Before I do I need you to understand I don’t need anything or want anything from you.” 

“Okay, sweetheart. I understand.” Ben’s heart quickened and his mind began to race. 

“Ben, I went to the doctor for a physical and they ran some routine tests. The doctor called me today with the results.” I swallowed hard and took a deep shaky breath.

“It’s okay, Y/N. Is everything okay?” My voice quivered, “No Ben, but I will be. Ben, I’m pregnant.” 

Ben almost dropped his phone, “What? Is it mine or Tom’s?” “It’s yours. I’m positive. But I don’t want or need anything from you. I just wanted you to know. You have a right to know.” 

“Y/N, please tell me where you are. I want to be there with you.” “Ben, it’s too late. You made your choice and I’ve made mine. I’ll keep you updated on the baby, but I’m not expecting anything. I don’t want them to feel like they are unloved or unworthy.” 

“Don’t do that.” His voice dripped with venom. “Don’t do what? Tell the truth? Ben I know you used me. I was stupid enough to fall in love with you, stupid enough to believe I mattered and that you loved me too. But you’re not capable of loving anyone, are you?!”

“Stop! You do matter to me, dammit. I’m a fucking coward! Is that what you want to hear? I’m a fucking coward who finally let his walls down, made love to a beautiful woman, apparently made a baby with her and then I pushed her away. All because I’m too much of a fucking coward to admit…” His voice trailed off. 

I heard the pain in his voice and it sent a pang of guilt and sadness through my heart. “To admit what Ben?”

“Just forget it. You’ve made up your mind already, Y/N. I want to be in our baby’s life. They will know I’m their father and I’ll do whatever I can to protect them.”

“Ben.” My voice is soft and unsure. “Y/N.” “Please tell me what you were going to say. I need to hear it. Please.” My voice quivered and I felt the tears start to fall. 

Ben was quiet on the other end. He took a deep breath. “I um.. Shit, this is harder than being tortured for 40 years.” I chuckled softly, “Ben, please. You can trust me. I love you, Ben.” 

Just like that a switch flipped, “Y/N, I’m sorry. I’ve been a fucking pussy. I let everything Crimson and those Reds do to me cloud my judgement and build up walls. You broke through those walls without even trying. Now you’re having my baby. Y/N, I’m so sorry it took me this long to grow a pair. I love you. I’ve loved you since the moment I laid eyes on you.” 

My breath hitched and I smiled. There it was. Ben finally said it. Finally admitting what he had been pushing down deep. 

“I love you too, Ben. Now get your ass over here.” I gave him the address and he laughed, “Yes ma’am. I’m on my way.”

When Annie came back from the store I told her what happened and how Ben was coming over. She hugged me and told me she was glad he finally admitted he loved me. “I knew it this whole time. It was the only thing that made sense. He’s been terrified of giving his heart away again and having it crushed. I’m happy for your sweetie. I’m going to leave so you two can have some privacy. Let me know how it goes.” I nodded and gave her a hug. 

I sat on the couch and waited for Ben. My heart pounded in my chest. Every minute felt like an eternity. An hour had passed since the phone call. My heart began to ache. It doesn’t take an hour to get here from the apartment. Oh god, he did it again. I let myself believe him.

As the familiar ache started to fill my heart the sound of the doorbell pulled me from my thoughts. 

I took a deep breath and opened the door. Standing there was Ben. Looking as amazing as ever. In his hands was a bouquet of my favorite flowers, a bag filled with my favorite snacks and another bag. 

I chuckled when I saw it. His green eyes met mine, “Sorry I’m late sweetheart. I had to make a stop.” 

He walked in, sat the stuff down and I leaped in his arms. He pulled me flush to his chest and kissed me. The kiss was gentle at first but then it deepened. The pain and sorrow from the past two months melted away with every swipe of our tongues, every brush of his fingertips. 

When we pulled away from each other our chests were heaving for air. Ben’s hands cupped my face, “God you’re so beautiful, and you’re having my baby.” I smiled and leaned into his touch, “Yeah, we’re having a baby, Ben.” 

He placed his hands gently on my stomach, “Hey baby. It’s your dad. You’re going to come out and kick ass.” I playfully slapped his arm, “Ben, language.” He smirked, “Sorry, but he will.” “Oh so it’s a he?” 

Ben just looked at me, “I like to think so. He’s going to grow up loved, strong and I’ll always be so fucking proud of him.” 

I saw tears prick Ben’s eyes. I placed my hands on his chest, “Ben, you’re going to be an amazing father. You just have to let us in. Don’t push us away and always remember there is nothing you could ever do that will make us not love you. Hell, even after you slept with that woman I was still in love with you.” 

I stepped closer to Ben, “I still love you, Ben. So much. This baby, our baby is going to be loved and grow up strong like you are. You’re worthy of love and so much more.”

Ben pulled me close to his chest and held me tight. “How did I get so lucky to have your love? I’m sorry I pushed you away. I’m sorry I made you ever feel unloved and unwanted.” The tears that had pricked his eyes were starting to fall. 

I’d never seen him cry and my heart ached. I reached up and wiped his tears away with my thumbs. “Ben, you’re here now and that’s what matters. Don’t ever do that again or we (I placed my hand on my stomach) will kick your ass.” 

He chuckled, “I wouldn’t think of it. This, us, our baby, is all I’ll ever need. I made not saying I love you an art, but with you I never want to miss the chance to say it again. “I love you, Y/N. Now and forever.” “I love you too, Ben. Now and forever.”

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[juniperskye]

Turn to Stone

Based on the following ask: I'd like a Hotch x reader where reader is a professional dancer please! She gives Hotch tickets to one of the performances she's participating in. Hotch invites the rest of the team and reader gets to show off with a partner dance. I picture reader and her dance partner being like Fred Astaire and Ginger Rogers or Ariana Debose and David Alvarez, but if you have another pair in mind that's fine too. – Okay so I used to LOVE SYTYCD and one of my favorite contemporary duets was Melanie and Marko dancing to turn to stone. Travis Wall is an incredible choreographer!!! So that is the dance I am picturing.

Aaron Hotchner x Dancer! Fem Reader

Fluff

Word count: 1324

Not edited - please be kind. Requests are open and feedback is welcome if it's constructive!

Warnings: My blog is 18+, minors DNI, Age gap (non-specified), reader is a professional contemporary dancer, no use of y/n, Fem reader, reader has no physical description (she can however be lifted and participate in a contemporary dance routine), established relationship with Hotch, use of pet names let me know if I missed any!

I do not consent to having my work translated or reposted to any other site. That being said I do not own the characters portrayed in this story.

“Okay, I have your ticket at will-call, you’re gonna be there right?” You questioned nervously.

“Yes sweetheart I will be there. I have made sure consultations have been sent out and I put in a request to be off tomorrow evening. There shouldn’t be any issues.” Aaron reassured you.

“Okay! Sorry, I’m just nervous. It is a big performance, and I really want you to be there.” You rushed.

“I know, you’ve been working so hard honey, and I wouldn’t miss it.” He confirmed.

You hadn’t told Aaron that you’d actually been chosen for a partner dance with one of the guys in your company. He and you were often partnered up, even within group numbers…and that was mainly because Marko and you had incredible chemistry on stage. The two of you were able to anticipate one another’s movements without words.

You’d been rehearsing every day for weeks, the group routines and your partner routine, practicing again and again until the movements became second nature. Part of the reason you’d put so much pressure on yourself was because your partner dance would be the closing number of the entire performance.

 --

What you didn’t know was that Aaron had also been keeping a secret from you.

He’d gone ahead and invited his whole team to see your dance performance. He’d mentioned to them that it had been coming up and he expressed how proud he was and how hard you’d worked, and that led to Garcia asking if they could tag along. Who was he to say no? This was an opportunity for them to see how amazing you were.

Aaron had seen you on the stage a few times before and every time you managed to take his breath away. He was always in awe of how effortless you made your movements look and it was just incredible to see you following your dreams and expressing them so passionately. You inspired him, and he wanted to share that…to show you off to his team.

--

As the day came and went, your nerves and excitement only grew. This is how it was before every show…you’d feel a teeny tiny bit of anxiety, but your excitement would cloud it every time. You became a dancer because it was who you were, it was in your bones.

That night, Aaron made you a simple dinner of grilled chicken and steamed vegetables. He knew you wouldn’t want to eat anything heavy the night before your performance. You ate while going over the highlights of your day…both omitting the fact that you both were currently holding a secret from the other.

When you two got into bed for the evening, Aaron gently rubbed and stretched your feet and ankles assisting you in working those muscles, keeping them loose and ready for your big show.

Aaron held you close that night, feeling almost giddy about the fact that he’d get to show you off tomorrow.

--

The next morning, Aaron got up and made you tea with honey, he knew you’d be up early to head to the studio.

“Thanks baby.” You whispered.

“Of course.” Aaron kissed you. “I will see you tonight, okay? You are going to be amazing.”

“Thank you Aar. I love you so much!” You hugged him.

“I love you too. Have a good day and break a leg!” He called before heading out the door.

You sipped your tea and packed the things you’d need for the day. You grabbed the lunch that Aaron packed for you – full of healthy snacks and your water bottle – and you left for the day.

Your company did some last-minute costume fittings, and makeup trials. Then they moved into stretches and warmups before shifting into a full-blown dress rehearsal.

The program was organized as such:

Full company contemporary

Men’s jazz

Women’s partner ballet

Elite company ballroom

Women’s Jazz

Couple’s partner salsa

Full company modern

Select company acro

Couple’s partner contemporary (aka your dance)

The dress rehearsal went perfectly, your director only making a few minor changes to ensure there was plenty of time for costume changes. The choreographers pulled a few people aside to give notes and ensure everyone was ready.

Your choreographer, Travis, pulled Marko and you to a studio to have you run your duet again, he wanted to push the both of you to really feel the emotion of the music and the movements. Travis was big on connection and chemistry in his routines, he wanted people to feel the emotion conveyed through your dancing. Once he felt satisfied with your progress he let you guys rest.

--

Aaron walked up to will-call to pick up the tickets, while he was waiting he sent you a quick text.

Hey gorgeous, you are going to be amazing. You inspire me every day with your passion, and I can’t wait to see you on that stage. I love you always. A.

“Hi, I’m picking up for Aaron Hotchner, there should be two orders.”

“Yes, I see there is a single ticket and then a set of six additional tickets.” The clerk confirmed.

“That’s correct.” Aaron nodded.

Aaron took the tickets and distributed them between the members of his team. They all then made their way into the auditorium to take their seats.

--

Aaron’s text gave you an additional wave of confidence to get you through this performance. The whole company was buzzing in anticipation.

The performances passed by in a blur. One after another, running off stage to change and adjust your hair and makeup as needed. Every time you came onto the stage, Aaron would point you out to the team. They couldn’t help but smile and giggle at him…he was just so proud, and it was an infectious feeling.

“Ladies and Gentlemen, thank you all for being here tonight. We have one final performance for you tonight. So please join me in welcoming our final two dancers this evening, performing a contemporary routine, Turn to Stone, choreographed by Travis Wall.

--

When you entered the stage, made up to look like a statue, Aaron was stunned to silence. He couldn’t believe you’d been able to keep this to yourself long enough to surprise him tonight.

The piano began, signaling Marko and you to move. The two of you were in sync, moving as one, beautifully gracing the stage. The crowd roared as you progressed through your routine, Marko lifting and catching you with ease during the lifts, as the music came to crescendo.

Aaron had tears in his eyes as he watched you move. The raw emotion you and Marko emitted with every point of your toe, twirl, lift, you two were telling a story and it was touching each person that sat in the audience before you.

As the song concluded, Marko shifted in close to you and you both froze to mimic statues. Silence filled the room briefly before the crowd erupted in applause…gifting you a standing ovation.

Marko and you took a quick bow before exiting the stage. Heading back to get some of this makeup off before greeting Aaron.

--

You ran towards Aaron, leaping into his arms, squealing in delight. You were on cloud nine, the routine had gone perfectly, and you couldn’t have been happier with the outcome.

“You were incredible. That duet, honey, I-I don’t even know what to say. You were, you just. I’m so proud of you. I love you so much.” Aaron was at a loss for words.

“I love you too! Thank you so much for being here to support me.  I didn’t want you to miss this.” You smiled.

Aaron passed you a bouquet of flowers and gestured towards the BAU team who all stood in awe, watching the exchange between you and their boss. Shock written on their faces, seemingly from his softness regarding you.

“Guys, this is my amazing girlfriend.”

Taglist: @bernelflo @pastelpinkflowerlife @just-moondust