#because now i'm playing another fictional version of myself on

[delborovic]

What is the birthday of Del? And what happened to her after Annie and Ginger were the winners, what was the purpose of Rellik and Del They were in the tournament? (Sorry there are too many questions, I'm so excited heehe)

My birthday is December 16, '85! :)

And as for what happens after Law of Talos... that's totally up to you and your imagination! I bowed out after my loss in the competition, and thoroughly enjoyed everyone else's entries- but I didn't think ahead beyond what would have happened if I had managed to win my round. What there is beyond the end of the story.. that's up to whoever feels like pondering it!

[reverie-obsessingtime]

Why I think Sparkle is a maladaptive daydreamer coded character and who it plays part into her character as a whole: from a maladaptive daydreamer (and a character analysis)

(Ok folks, this turned out rather long so get your popcorn and water at hands reach!.....trust me.)

Hi!!!! :,D This is my second post here and it feels like it's been a decade but here I am again haha...

This time I'm here with something I'm more confident in exploring as, I myself, am a maladaptive daydreamer! :,)

And because of that Sparkle hit me like a TRUCK and her MADD (mal. daydreamer for short) coding makes me love her and go insane about it at the same time.(it means a lot to me ok?😭)

Sooo I'm here today to expand and shine light on it to the rest of the masses as there isn't much appreciation for Sparkle (which is understandable cause she is a character not everyone can savor) and I feel like her maladaptive daydreaming can help understand her way of thinking.

comments, reblogs and likes are VERY much appreciated if you would like to see more of my billion cents and share with others to further show me support :,)

if you have any disagreements, corrections, different opinions or such that you would like to discuss I'm always open to further discussions as I would love to receive back engagement with these posts (as long as it is in good manners)

Enough talk from me though, let's get into it already:

What is maladaptive daydreaming?

Throw the google definitions out the window, let me give you a gist of it from someone who has it:

it's a coping mechanism turned addiction that can develop from loneliness or trauma (it is also common in people with ADHD). It helps you deal with the current reality you are in by offering escapism but it differs from normal daydreaming because it becomes maladaptive (as the name suggests).

What that looks like is being addicted to escaping reality through it by daydreaming, which can make you want to trade time forming human bonds, hanging out with friends, doing tasks you should, even taking care of yourself (etc.) with daydreaming. Most of the time you don't even need to do it but daydreaming is so much more fun and entering than ur current boring life that you keep doing it anyway. It can isolate you and make you lose touch with reality (from one degree to another depending on the individual).

But people with MADD DON'T ACTUALLY BELIEVE IN THEIR DAYDREAMS. They KNOW they aren't real. Some might willfully want to believe in them but at the end of the day they know it's all made up. If you are a MADD but get serious delusions about it you might want to check more into that cause something is overlapping.

Maladaptive daydreaming is MUCH more immersive and vivid than normal daydreams (what can I say, practice makes perfect🤭). Some MADD will stim while daydreaming in various ways that have to do with whatever they are daydreaming for enhanced immersion (some will pace around the room, some will make facial expressions, some will catch themselves talking, etc)

The daydreams each differ from individual to individual and can be classified in multiple types, some make OCs while others imagine a different version of themselves or make a character similar to certain degrees to them.

We are very much fictional-stories-makers nerds no matter to be honest

Now that we got the explanation out of the way:

Why do I think Sparkle has MADD?

🎇Proof number one: her character story IV

..... *POINTS AGGRESSIVELY* like?? COME ON!! (my "she is just like me fr!!!" moment and what made me want to make this whole post)

Ok, ok, let me try to be serious about this 😮‍💨

Analyzing this alone:

"It's truly addictive to me" maladaptive daydreaming is a behavior that is addictive to the individual (du uh)

"The more I imagine, the more I get absorbed in those characters" Getting absorbed into your daydreams (and it being addictive) is a core part of MADD and what differentiates it from normal daydreaming.

"the wonderful and tragic situations I create for them, and the emotions they experience in those circumstances..." Here, Sparkle is talking about the characters she makes and how by acting them and playing their roles and their stories, she enjoys herself and is entertained by them.

From my perspective, Sparkle is an individual who finds the emotions of others and how each reacts put in various situations, fascinating, entraining and enjoyable to witness, observe and ponder on more than an average individual.

Which I think is something all of us MADD, writers, OC makers, character analyzing enjoyers and fic writers can relate to ( "no"? ok. now tell me your OCs tragic backstory come on~ come on~ ik you have one. No? Ok then tell me through what psychological horror you want ur fav to go through~ Ik you know that you want them to get tortured by the writers at least just a tiny bit....I know what you are.)

🌸Further more quotes from her character story IV:

"Lies? Come on, I'm not trying to tell a grand story or fabricate an eye-catching experience... I'm wholeheartedly exercising my imagination for my own sake. I imagine various lives, seek excitement, and then recreate them as best I can, and pump the brakes on my imaginative balloon just a second before it bursts."

.... genuinely what do you want me to say honestly, that's SUCH a MADD to say, pls reread how many times it takes to get it. Everything in that is just PEAK maladaptive daydreamingness. Genuinely I don't have anything to add that won't sound like "Water is H2O and 2+2=4" 🤷

"Seriously, having a script is far from enough. First and foremost, I must wholeheartedly believe that the character I'm portraying truly exists. Then, I need to imagine the other stories where the character would appear. I always need extra information to make their motivation logical and emotional."

Sparkle seems dedicated to portraying, grasping and understanding her characters by IMMERSING herself into them as much as possible. Going the EXTRA mile, such as imagining other stories they could appear in, making herself believe the character TRULY exists and informing herself about them to portray them the best.

Which, again, all writers, OC makers and fic writers who actually give more than two dice about their character can relate to as we want our characters to be most accurate and well written and for that we do all Sparkle said.

The "I must wholeheartedly believe that the character I'm portraying truly exists" strikes a chord in me because it's such a ??? NON MADD ARE NOT THAT DEDICATED TO IT JSJSKSJ THAT'S SUCH A MADD MILDLY CONCERNING BUT MADD THING TO SAY SKDHSKSN IK WHAT YOU ARE!!!

OK OK.

I can hear you going "but she is an actor, it's just part of being an actor". Ok Sherlock, but Sparkle is not your average actor. Case and point:

Sparkles love for the stage of acting and how it ties into her MADD:

🎇Who is Sparkle an actor for?

Herself.

Saying "she is so matriculated and dedicated because she is an actor" is only half way true.

Sparkle's love for acting and her maladaptive daydreaming are things that can coexist at the same time. (just like being a writer and MADD for ex. (yes, some of ur fav writers could have been MADD))

Which got born from which? We don't know but both are proof of how much she loves the other.

("But you said MADD develops from trauma or loneliness" YES!! And we still have no real idea about Sparkles backstory but ik damn well a "normal" person with an average fine life doesn't end up like Sparkle.)

(Also no, her character stories 1,2,3 and be at most half trusted as she says she makes them up for each individual both in her char. story 4 and a voice line.

They could either be total nonsense or parts and truths of her past but altered/heavily exaggerated and metaphorical. Pick ur fighter tbh.

"There are a few versions that are particularly popular." "Liking and believing are two different things, but people are more likely to believe in their favorite stories." "Lies? Come on, I'm not trying to tell a grand story or fabricate an eye-catching experience... I'm wholeheartedly exercising my imagination for my own sake."

She is basically toying with everyone who asks including the player for her own amusement and, honestly? Iconic.)

🌸She acts for her own entertainment.

Wealth, status, power... None of this matters to Sparkle. The only thing that can lure her interest is "amusement". (from her twt intro)

Her doing all this. Immersing herself into characters so deeply. It's all for herself and her own enjoyment. Just like MADD is for us and our own enjoyment and entertainment.

Not to be the greatest actor or for others recognizing her. In her introduction on twitter, she says: "I'm not exactly a person loaded with cool skills, and dreaming big isn't really my thing." Which says enough to contradict such ideas.

Yes, some MADD might go on to become writers or actors but some don't. And those who don't could still want to improve their characters FOR THEMSELVES because that will bring them more enjoyment, because they love what they do and their characters for one reason or other and want them to shine like they see them could.

🌸Sparkles elation is acting and MADD.

Elation: great happiness and exhilaration.

What makes her feel elation? Acting. What is her heavy immersive acting that is all for herself to feel elation intertwined with? Maladaptive daydreaming ✨

(wow, shocked, ik)

Sparkles Myriad Celestial Trailer: Behind the Curtain

Next, I want to talk about both her Myriad and Character Trailer through a MADD lens, starting off with her Myriad Celestial Trailer:

What struck a chord in me with it is her "conversation" with her mask. What is her mask really representing for her? The way I see it: it's her MADD and also, Sparkle.

At first she says it keeps on smiling even when she doesn't and that she can hide under it. While in reality we might not be able to smile all the time. Escaping into our daydreams through characters who can helps. The use of a veil to describe it can also be interpreted as choosing to hide your true emotions from yourself and others through emulating a characters happy emotions and state of mind.

Second, she says the mask imitates her face, her emotions, like a mirror showing her own reflection. When writers come up with characters, some might be similar to them through a degree with or without the creator even realizing. This can happen to MADD more since we are creating characters for ourselves and its a coping mechanism so emotions seep through unless we make a character/s that we want to share with others. It's also a way you can understand and grasp yourself better. In this particular setting, I think she means how through some characters she acted as (made by others) herself and emotions shines true,like that character and her acting were a mirror.

Third, it takes a darker turn, "when I'm smiling, you're screaming. When I'm angry, you're crying. When I'm sad, you're smiling". This could be her MADD taking a tool on her.

"When I'm smiling, you're screaming" like when you are content with reality but your addiction's screaming at you to be noticed, like an icky who wants to be scratched. The urge to do it despite not needing to.

"When I'm angry, you're crying" This is her "mask" empathizing with her, weeping for her anger and understanding it like no one else could.

"When I'm sad, you're smiling" this could be the situation from the first instance, but it takes a darker turn so I think the "mask" smiles because it knows that her sadness assures its existence.

Addiction is dependent on your sadness because you do it to comfort you through that sadness. Her acting and MADD is both her addiction and her elation.

From Sparkles tone, she might even be surprised at how, despite her deep sadness, the mask can still smile.

"You're like a face, steering at me" she says at the end. It brings back in mind the imagery of a mirror/reflection. But instead of a reflection, it's a different reflection, still a reflection, but not.

It reminds of when I see characters being depicted as steering into a mirror and they are smiling but their reflection reflects how they truly feel inside (emo ik)

I think that's what it's supposed to mean. Your true self steering at you, it's uncomfortable and penetrating.

Or maybe it's a blank face being unsurprised or just lacking any emotions or maybe the face itself is empty waiting to be drawn on an expression.

It's a very vague sentence, and I don't want to pretend like I 100% understand the meaning behind it, because it can be interpreted in very different ways and only an explanation by the one who said it can give us a sure answer. Maybe it's something we can't even understand with the info we currently have on her.

Overall, she holds positive feelings about her mask but she also recognizes it's kinda fcked up but she still chooses it at the end of the day for the elation it gives ("I am elation" ok girl.)

🌸In this section, I also want to come back to her:

Oh who is she?🎶~

Actually? Good question! :D

I think it was Sampo who commented that Sparkle's name is probably made up (which du uh)

But that is fascinating as well.

We see this girl at first in her trailer looking soft and innocent, nothing like the more.... eccentric person we know today.

If you look closely, she DOESN'T have the butterfly/flower(?) symbol in her eye at the start but she DOES at the end. Which to me represents how she and Sparkle were separate at the start.

"It doesn't matter how I am off stage.

When I'm on stage, I'm just Sparkle"

With the end of this video, this whole thing might be made up go, but that would be too pointless and annoyingly stupid so I'm inclined to believe she isn't fckin with us in this one. (for the most part)

That said, it seems like the girl Sparkle was before was performing for her love of acting, her madd, and for the audience.

But as time went on, doing all of this for an audience over and over lost its meaning (and probably drove her insane a little)

"When I realized that life was just a play, I wanted to leave the stage.

Because off stage, there is a even bigger stage"

Her acting, madd and elation shapes her way of seeing life and others. Why confine yourself to a stage when you can take yourself and your characters to the big stage of life itself and have fun with it the absolute bonkers way you want?

She is very much a Shakespeare truther, as he put it:

"All the world's a stage, and all the men and women merely players. They have their exits and their entrances; And one man in his time plays many parts."

That's how her acting made Sparkle see things (to an extreme )

🌸Another thing is this scene:

"Im.... I'm not Sparkle

No, I am Sparkle"

Both in her Myriad and Character Trailer, she is actively conflicting with herself.

In this moment. She shows opposition to "Sparkle". The physical constraint is interesting imagery as well. Maybe she feels trapped by "Sparkle"? Like "Sparkle" is against her? Why is she? Because she doesn't allow her to be Sparkle(/herself/her true self)?

She separates herself from Sparkle at the start but becomes her after and laments that she isn't her than at the end, and only then, her eyes have the same symbol this big eyes have in the back (Sparkles) eyes and she becomes Sparkle.

Which, um, IS SO INTERESTING!??!?!?!

I think at the end, she gives into her want to be Sparkle and fully embraces it. Fully embraces the path of elation.

And I don't think Sparkle isn't her. I think it's still her, just more free, unrestrained version of herself that doesn't hold back when the rest of society those.

Think like how different someone with social anxiety disorder is when they feel comfortable with summon and lets out their weirdness for example. We hold back on many actions because of societal perception but she stopped giving a fck and WILL set up a hundred "bombs" on a ship to fck with people for her own amusement.

Seeing life as a stage comes with seeing the absurdism of if all and choosing to stop giving a sht and have your own fun and entertainment. Play the roles you want to play instead of playing the part.

🌸As for my take on this part?

Yeah, maybe the whole thing wasn't her true backstory, but I think it's not 100% false either. Or maybe it is and she sees it as her playing another role. The role of her past self how is so so different it's her own character at this point, right? :))

It sure was more realistic than all the other stories going on in the background (like come on, Harry Potter, Sparkle playing Herta)

"Who is the real Sparkle"

Maybe the answer is all of the Sparkles are Sparkle.

Am I gonna elaborate? Mmm, nope. :)

--------------------------------------------------------------

*cracks knuckles* OOOOOKKK this turned out quite long Jesus (never put me to write something about a fictional character in a few paragraphs, that's physically impossible for me)

Don't worry though, I'm probably gonna make a part two soon 🙃 (analyzing her Character Trailer, her design, her in game animations, who knows what ales, etc etc~) (no we are NOT done, we. are absolutely. NOT done.)

Soooo can you tell how much I like Sparkle? She lives rent free in my mind actually.

There isn't enough talk about her more deeply despite how MUCH there is to ponder on so I have to take it upon myself to do it 😮‍💨

If you made it here..... will you marry me?🥹💍

NAH NAH NAH JUST KIDDING 🤭

But if you did then thank you for giving me the time of day and I hope this post spark(l)ed some curiosity and interest into this little hedonistic gremlin! :D

(also no, I don't ignore, justify or support her racist remarks)

I do these posts mostly for myself but someone else to respond back is really nice! :,)

Ok, I'm signing off for this one. See ya in part two 👋:)

[mothytheghost]

Expressing my experience with the whole Miku and Mikuo characters

Idk it's kinda starting to make me distant because of the whole Miku and Mikuo joke.

I really wanna express it but I'm scared too it's because of the whole 'they're doing this for fun and joking about it' yeah I get that but you still need to be careful with portrayals in a story

It's not about them making the characters for fun. I think this is serious and they need to be careful with the whole portrayal of a certain community.

The Self ship community has been a community known for people who have love for a certain character or multiple. This could be for Platonic and Romantic. And has been known to have been targeted by cyber bullying. Because the characters are fictional and people are portrayed as Hopeless romantics

What is the problem with Miku and Mikuo?. Miku is based on a Japanese icon in Japan. Known for her abilities to sing the songs you make and has been popularized in the 2000s to now. Meanwhile Mikuo is a gender bent version of her. Canonically being called Siblings in the SAMS universe.

What's the problem and why are they harmful?

Miku has been Portrayed as the Crazy Fan girl and has an admiration to the character Sun. She stalks him. And believes he's more happier with her if they're together. Using the fans old assumption he's depressed and drinking a lot. Which is proven false now.

She played pretend having a adopted a child and claimed it to be Suns. And pushes him to have the kid when he doesn't want them. But the twist was the child was someone else's kid and was used to take advantages of his emotions. Another portrayal because some self shippers love taking their love life seriously. Having a fan child of their own.

Mikuo has a similar goal to her and kidnapped the character. Locking him up and used titanium handcuffs. Which Titanium is a Heavy metal that has dangerous toxins if inhailed.

Im scared tsams community is going to act up saying that this is made for fun. But at the same time I'm just worried people are going to take these jokes seriously... It's even worse on me because I self ship myself with Nexus from this show and the creators have a history interacting with fans and can turn aus into things that become canon. And I do not want to be portrayed as a crazy fangirl. It hurts a lot and I don't like the idea of myself being made fun of especially as a person who takes my romantic interest seriously because it's so hard for me to get a partner and I try to find ways to feel loved

[magicalyaku]

Ok ok, let's get back on track. Work was draining these past weeks, but I'm on vacation now, so time to catch up! June was the month of the library books. I put a bunch on hold in April and May and they all came in at the same time. And after up to 10 weeks of waiting I was not about to push a single one back further, so I had to work a bit there. 8D Also, according to my list I've read 51 books in the first 6 months of the year. I seem to remember wanting to read less this year? Yeah. Not going well.

Gwen & Art are Not in Love (Lex Croucher): I read it in the very first days of June, which was basically an eternity ago, so my memory is a bit wonky. I do remember I had lots of fun! It was funny and sweet with a solid story and serious times when needed, nice characters, good adventure. The female lead did not get on my nerves! There was a cat! And a girl with a (legendary) sword! I think, though, it's a bit unfair that both boys ended up with permanent bodily harm while the girls got away scratchfree … Go read it!!

Thief in the Night (KJ Charles): I didn't know anything about this other than the summary when I put it on my waitlist in the library. After 10 weeks it finally came in and my first thought was "Is it broken?!" because it's only about 100 pages! It is a full story, mind you, I was just so suprised by it (and because I waited for so long!). It's a companion story to The Gentle Art of Fortune Hunting, featuring the brother of the protagonists of that one. It's pretty cute. Super short, but just the right length for a simple story. We can have a simple story once in a while. I had a good time reading this.

The Gentle Art of Fortune Hunting (KJ Charles): I borrowed this right after Thief in the Night. This is a full-length novel, so it has a lot more time to dive into characters and intricacies. It's nice. Like not groundbreaking, but very enjoyable. There's this thing about (pseudo-historic) British aristocracy that just calls for mocking them. I liked a lot how the climax and ending played out!

Flowerheart (Catherine Bakewell): Now this was another difficult book for me. I thought with time I'd get a little more chill with YA fantasy heroines. Seems I'm not there yet. The heroine here has these whiny self-pitying phases that really annoyed me. She's like "Oh maybe he never liked me in the first place" just because the guy didn't want her help at one thing. But: 1) He was her very close childhood friend, that was not a lie. 2) She has like one day of training in and can't control her magic, so her help would be … probably no help at all. And 3) when he told her before that he needs her on the weekends she said no, she can't … So why is she getting upset?! I hate characters like this. /D But thankfully, this is only half of the time, the other half she's pretty ok (the guy as well) and I actually found myself liking the book. The romance is acceptable and it does have some nice imagery going on with all the flower magic and stuff.

Sounds Fake But Okay (Sarah Costello & Kayla Kaszyca): My one non-fiction book of the year. :D It's about seeing the world from the perspectives of a_spec people. Like taking apart all that amatonormativity and all these ideas about romance and family and stuff that most of our world sees as right and normal. So it's not just a "let me tell you what aromanticism and asexuality are"-book but dives a bit deeper. I found it insightful. I think, both a_spec and allo people can take something away from reading this. Challenging our social constructs in thought at least can't hurt after all. Regarding the ebook library edition I read I didn't quite like the layout as the incorporated community quotes where not well marked and I stumbled over them a few times before realising it's another quote. That's probably no issue in the paper version though. I also struggled to tell the authors Sarah and Kayla apart. They introduce themselves and their stories in the beginning but I immediately jumbled them up ...

Captive Prince Trilogy (C.S. Pacat): I borrowed the English edition from the library … and didn't want to return it! Which is stupid because I own the German version in paper. But that kinda sums up how I feel about these books. Captive Prince was not the very first gay fantasy book I read almost two years ago but the first one I liked. (The actual first was Rowan & Ash by Christian Händel which had a terribly selfish love interest and shied away from all the important conflict. (And yeah, long before that I did read The Raven Cycle but I picked that one up for the Ley lines and the no-kiss-promise. The gay was just a pleasant surprise, so I don't count it.)) Which is funny, because especially the beginning is so filthy! I remember being quite put off by this the first time around, but apparently it was intriguing enough to continue reading. I like the incredible slow-burn of Damen's and Laurent's relationship. The slow building of trust in a surrounding where trust is so rare. How shit happens between them and they have to sort it out on page before progressing. How you only catch glimpes of Laurent's true self for a long time. I like it when authors feel smart through their writing and writing Laurent's and the Regent's intrigues and all the different settings with war strategies etc. sure does feel smart to me. I like the slow-burn in stories as well when things start at some point and only get important much later and all weaves together beautifully. It's so rewarding. Look, where we started - look, how far we've come! Hah. u3u

Riley Weaver Needs a Date for the Gaybutante Society (Jason June): For the end of the month I went for something light and funny. Of all the authors I read last year F.T. Lukens and Jason June stuck with me the most. Lukens for the cozy charming fantasy and June for the slightly silly noisy onea. Riley Weaver is no exception to that. It does have a serious undertone and message, though, but due to the framework of the story it manages to never feel dull or preachy.

I also tried to read Dragonfall by L.R. Lam, but gave up after just 50 pages. I can't even say if it's good or bad, because I don't know. I couldn't stand the viewpoints. Like, there's three people. The first one is a 1st person narrator, who refers to the second person as You, but in the narration, not dialogue! That put me off so much. It was so … icky! The second person narrates 1st person as well. If there's another "you" I don't know because I didn't make it to the point where they meet for real. And then the third person comes along and … it's 3rd person?! And I screamed! God, I hate that. I mean, it can work and I have read books that I like with inconsistent viewpoints but there was nothing here for which I was willing to endure. To be fair, I don't like dragons in the first place, so maybe we never were a good match from the start. :'D

That's it for June!

[edapparently]

Dirk Gently and The Long Dark Ranting of the Soul

Over the past few days I've been having quite a hard time due to happenings in my personal life To give myself a distraction and keep my head calm when I need it, I've been reading Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency. Since I'm already a fan of almost every version of The Hitchhiker's Guide to The Galaxy it was an obvious choice. I had also previously watched the first few episodes of the 2016 American TV show with my cousin and then finished the whole show on my own since she went back home I love the book, I finished it today and I only started it two days ago. I fully intend to buy the second book (The Long Dark Tea-Time of the Soul) and have already bought the radio play adaptation of the first book on spotify There were two things that really surprised me about the book though. The first being the entire character of Professor Chronotis "Reg". I had already watched Shada, a Doctor Who story which was written by Douglas Adams but never finished due to a strike at the BBC. Though it has now had a new edit made and fully animated scenes made to fill in the gaps I was surprised to find the character (Chronotis), that I assumed was relegated only to Doctor Who, pop up in Dirk Gently. Joke with the sugar lumps and all! Though I suppose it wasn't the first time this had happened, I already knew about Doctor Who and the Kirkkit Men and how that was another story Adams had written for the show, was never made and was then subsequently adapted into Life, The Universe And Everything (the third Hitchhiker's book (and a personal fav)) The second thing that really surprised me about the book revolves around the 2016 American TV show version. I was not expecting to realize just how absolutely and undoubtedly not Dirk Gently it would turn out to be. That's not to say I didn't really enjoy the show, I loved it, but in retrospect I find it very difficult to justify actually calling it "Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency". Because it simply is not that. It's a very fun and clever science fiction murder mystery, but it also is not at all the story presented in the novels. it feels as if an American writer read the book "Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency" and wrote down several aspects that they deemed as important. For example: time travel, ghosts/souls, murder mystery, a character is made to believe they are being framed for said murder, cats, etc That American writer than passed that list on to a different American writer who had not read the book, so they came up with a totally new and original plot that has nothing to do with the book except those certain concepts and a character named "Dirk Gently" That doesn't mean I suddenly dislike either version, I love the book and I think the show is great. If you put a gun to my head and told me to chose a better one I would say the book though...

[ask-ikevamp-faust]

Some time ago I tried a IA that was supposed to roast me (haha) and it told me that I talk to much about you in my personal Twitter account (and is the true). I'm afraid I enjoy too much dissecting you in my own way in my free time. There is a lot I want to write about you but I tend to hold myself or bite my tongue, so is just me alone with my own thoughts.

I've been trying to recall where my fascination with your mythical figure started. I do remember I was about to visit the ranch of my family in the country side so I picked some books in the local library to entertain myself reading and I picked Goethe's "Faust". (Funny is that I also picked a copy of "Twilight" because the lovely girl in the store very enthusiatically recommended the book to me since it was the hot trend at that time. I already new of that book too because my friends love the Vampire genre and wanted to read it but that's another story. Anyway, what I found funny is that I got "Faust" and "Vampires" in the same day, interesting coincidence.)

I did read Faust first because it was my priority. I still think that Mephistopheles is my favorite character of that play, I find he was so delightful, he still gimme a good time because all the things he says. There is a lot of key scenes a love about the play, like when Faust creates a homunculous, when they visit the witch that will make Faust younger, all the drama when Faust wants to romance Margaret.

Some years later, there was a movie called "Faust" by Aleksandr Sokurov. Already knew about Sokurov because he was the one who filmed "Russian Ark". This Faust took some creative freedom and is a bit different from Goethe's version, but it was also very visually interesting in how the takes are deformed with a fisheye lend and some of the symbolism (Faust and Margaret literally drowning in pleasure and sin IIRC).

And I think one of my favorites so far is the classic "Faust" from Murnau. I was quite surprised because the movie is so well done and has incredible special effects for the era it was done, I love and miss when cinema was this level of creative, now everything is done with computers and graphics that makes things a lot more easy, but don't have the same flavor.

But I wonder how do you feel about all this fictional depictions of you since they are very different from the Johann I know. I'm still craving to learn about new undiscovered versions of you, but I also want to learn more about you in specific.

BTW, I was the one who wrote to the blog asking about what it was allowed or not about NSFW interactions and just asking questions because I'm not really familiar with roleplaying. I just thought it would be ok to say it since I feel like I'm already like three different people in your ask box, but now I'm only two (haha).

– @crowmero

I apologize for the long wait 🙂‍↕️ Thank you for your patience 💖

I’m not sure I completely understand what “roast” means. Charles explained it to me but it wasn’t very helpful. However, I do know what AI is, I have not used it very much myself; apparently it’s “the future”. While technology is useful I’m not sure it will ever completely replace real people, but who knows, I suppose it is a possibility. Anyway, I’m getting off topic… You say this AI said you talk about me too much and you admit that it’s true? How interesting, I’m flattered I occupy so much of your mind. There’s no better compliment than someone wanting to dissect me, please continue to do so. I see you have written much about me here already, if you’d like to continue sharing all your thoughts, don’t hesitate to come by and tell me. 

Ahh this is how you came to know my name, what an amusing introduction story. I’ve heard about these shiny vampires, they may be the most odd depiction of vampires I've seen; quite the coincidence you ended up with both. Since Mephistopheles is your favorite character here and you happen to enjoy his lines, quote 3 of your favorite lines from him. 

Both of these films sound both interesting and entertaining. They seem to do well in showing how you can take the same character and present them differently depending on the creative goals.

Actually, I haven’t interacted very much with the fictional depictions of myself. I’ve only heard whispers here and there whenever I go out. They all sound rather interesting, it wouldn’t be a bad idea to learn about them, maybe I’ll try it out sometime. I’ll use the ones you mentioned as starters, if you enjoyed them then they shouldn’t be bad. You’re always welcome to learn more about me, whether it’s myself or a different fictional depiction.

🌙 - Ohhh it was you?? Of course it’s okay! Thanks again for asking 😄 I was able to make more specific rules. I didn’t put any role-playing examples in the rules, I had some but didn’t add them since if anyone wanted to role-play that content, they would need to talk to me in the first place. I felt I could get more specific in DMs if needed. If you have more questions about it you can always DM me 😊

@crowmero

[lizziestudieshistory]

Books of 2023 - July

Somehow I've read a lot this month but haven't actually finished that many books considering I've been on holiday? I don't really know what happened.

Books read:

Silas Marner by George Eliot - this is by far the biggest surprise of the year. I was convinced I wasn't going to like George Eliot, but after reading Silas Marner I've been enchanted by her. On the surface I should have found this book a bit tedious, I typically don't like novels set in the countryside, however, I was hooked! Eliot's writing style was the big attraction here, she has such a lively style that I swear could make anything interesting after this, alongside her astoundingly convincing portrait of a village community in the 19th century. I came away believing people like those that inhabited Raveloe existed and I was fascinated by them. (It probably helped that I am VERY familiar with villiage communities in Warwickshire thanks to my research, which is where Raveloe is supposed to be.) Honestly this was the best place for me to start with George Eliot and I will be continuing.

The Age of Innocence by Edith Whaton - this was an impromptu read when I wanted an audiobook to listen to while sewing. However, I thoroughly enjoyed listening to this book! I was swept away into 1870s New York society and was captivated by how casually awful everyone turned out to be. I didn't enjoy it as much as The House of Mirth (mainly because I didn't like Archer, May, or Countess Olenska as much as Lily or Seldon) but I had a fabulous time revisiting Wharton.

Much Ado About Nothing by William Shakespeare - I love this play, it brings me so much joy when I read it and this time was no different. I still believe Beatrice is Shakespeare's best heroine and I will accept no arguments to the contrary.

Approximately 25 articles, reviews, essays, and introductions about Jane Austen's Emma by various authors - I don't know what's happened to me, I've become an obsessive... However, I have had a great time and learnt A LOT about regency literature in the process? It's given me a greater appreciation of Emma and I don't regret a moment I spent on this. My only problem is I don't really know what to do with all my notes!

DNF:

Mansfield Park by Jane Austen - I tried okay? However, I finished volume one and couldn't find a single reason to keep reading except completionism. I hated Fanny and the Bertrams, I was bored by the Crawfords, and I missed the style of Emma. Overall, I was left wondering why I was bothering with Mansfield Park as I wasn't enjoying myself. So, I dropped it to read something else that I'd actually enjoy.

Currently reading:

Evelina by Frances Burney - I'm in love with this book, but for some reason I'm not devouring it? I'm taking my time with it and revelling in the experience - I've made my peace with this and will continue to enjoy my leisurely read.

Richard II by William Shakespeare - I'm rereading this and taking it an act a day because I'm making notes. I'll actually finish it tomorrow, but I'm not counting it as read.

The Book of Lost Tales Part Two by J.R.R. Tolkien - another leisurely read because it's so dense and, like Shakespeare, I'm making notes when I feel inclined. I also really struggled to get through the section on The Tale of Tinuviel... (I don't like ANY of the prose versions of Beren and Luthien? It needs to be in verse for me to get into it 🤷‍♀️) But now I've got through that opening section I'm enjoying this a lot more.

Charles I and the People of England by David Cressy - my current non-fiction tome. I'm having a great time with this, but it was going to be a winner considering my unreasonable love for Charles I!

Jonathan Strange and Mr Norrell by Susanna Clarke - I have no idea how I ended up in the middle of this but I'm enjoying it well enough that I'm going to continue (although I think I prefer Piranesi?)

[myrmyrtheorca]

22, 23, 25! [Also hello Myell! I hope you're well and recovering smoothly 💕]

Hello Momo, thank you for passing by!! About the recovery... the short version is that I couldn't go through with the procedure because doctors refused to perform it on the day it was supposed to happen, since it was elective. So... no recovery was needed, except psychological, haha...

22. I don't! I'm perfectly aware that people who read fanfic mostly want to read about their favorite characters, and that OCs are kind of a niche (at least that's how it was presented to me). The fear of people reading the first chapter and going like "ugh, here's another brainless female OC that's going to join the vongola to learn the values of friendship and all, how boring" sometimes likes to knock on my brain, but I quickly remind myself that:

-Killer Whale is the story I want to tell, and even if it was a story as simple as that it would be worth writing it;

-Since KW is the story I want to tell, I love it. I love these characters, I love how they interact with the canon ones, I love the lore I built up and I love to scream it into the void.

Not everyone will like it, most of the fandom may skip it. But the feedback for it has been overwhelming and the people here on Tumblr as well as those on Discord have been incredibly supportive, how can I not love a story that brought me to meet so many wonderful people?

I obviously worry about being respectful of the topics I might touch, always being open to feedback and to learn more about them, but other than that? It's all fuzzy feelings!

23. Hm. Descriptive? Mellow? My sentences do tend to be lengthy...

25. Other than writing and drawing, I like playing videogames, mostly farming sims, VNs, monster collectors, coop base builders and the occasional (J)RPGs.

As some may have guessed by my hauls, I'm also a merch/figure/manga collector, though since I need to save up to refurbish my future home at the end of the year I'm only limiting myself to KHR-related stuff right now. I used to collect pokémon cards too, but it's become too demanding of me, so that's paused for now.

When I'm not splurging on fictional mafia men, I'm doing that on model kits! I'm a mess at building gunplas and the like, but it's just too much fun. My goal is one day to be able to approach more realistic kits like war aircrafts and tanks, so I can nurture my love for history as well.

[laismoura-art]

Hi @rasta-bot I hope you don't mind me continuing our conversation here, the reblogs were lagging my phone💀

Picking up exactly from where we stopped:

Deter me? Oh no, dear, you actually just invited me to sit down and play doll with you, and I'm taking that invitation!

---

Of course! I loved that rewrite! Delia being secretly in love with Amara and Amara loving her back, but neither of them can act on their mutual feelings fiven their current positions?? And Argus luring Delia's friend and love only to toss her aside afterwards AAA! NOT THE DOOMED LOVE!!! HAVE YOU. NO. MERCY???

On another note, is that right? Are you saying you're writing for more girls? My most special girl, Harumi, included?👀👀 count me as intrigued!

---

Aww, thank you! I'm so happy my AU is appreciated! I loved to work on it, and I take much pride in the results, and it makes my day to know other people enjoyed it!!🥹🩷🩵🩷🩵🩷

---

Now, yes, back to the main point!

(First of all, let's refrain from the "They are fictional" argument cause... let's be real, it's annoying, and we are both exchanging walls of texts about said fictional characters. We are WAY PAST the "they are fictional" arguments. Just be as passionate as you like, and I'll do the same. One passionate fan from another.)

And just to clear the air once and for all: I do understand you didn't mean to attack/offent/hate on MK1 Tanya.

Yes, the wording bothered me (mostly because I've heard them on worse contexts by far less well intentioned ppl), but I don't think you hate her because of it (never did, honestly).

My reply was mainly due to the "they gave Tanya what was supposed to be Jade's" cause that's an argument I find flawed.

It does cause (non intentional) damage to people's view of the character (I've seen it before with both Kuai and Harumi) and in Tanya's case specifically, it IS an argument that lacks evidence to base itself.

I already explained why, no need to keep repeating myself, it will only bore us both. So let's move on from that!

You said you don't like Tanya's change of alignment, and I take that this is tied to your dislike of Multiverse. You're not a fan of Status Quo changes (at least not drastically), that's a fact and that's perfectly fine!

I personally find her change of alignment intriguing, but that comes from my liking of Multiverse. I do enjoy a vast change of Status Quo (probably why I've been avoiding comics recently, their resistance to change has deeply annoyed me and it really makes me feel like the character are just stuck because they are unable to learn cause learning leads to change and GOD FORBID CHANGES! Sorry, for the vent)

In the end MK1 Tanya is a product of Multiverse and I if you don't like Multiverse and already liked her previous self, there ain't much to be done here, sadly.

All I can do is insist this version of Tanya will NOT get in the way of Jade and her development! They can co-exist and their stories will not contradict or disturb each other.

You know what? I BET you can create an amazing story about Jade and her connection with Delia without ONCE contradict canon!

---

Ok, I see now why she appeals to you... And that's the only thing I can think of is:

This is you:

And I can respect the commitment to the evil women. Support women's wrongs!✊🏾

---

Now, I actually want to go back to the MKX Tanya, you got me wondering here:

You said you don't like her being a Rebel like Jade, but this take popped in my brain and I'd like to share:

You say Tanya works as a perfect Anti-Jade, right?

And it's interesting to have them contrast each other and having Tanya being a Rebel takes that away.

BUT hear me out: couldn't that ADD to your point instead?

See, I believe a good way to show how different a character is from another is to put them in similar situations and see how they react to them!

They both want the same thing, right? A free Edenia, but the way both fight to achieve that same goal is vastly different! I mean, just look at the princesses each of them chooses to follow, I think that alone already speaks volumes about each of these characters!

I think showing their different reactions and approaches on a similar subject would be a perfect way to emphasise your point!

But that's me, do as you wish with this take, it's for you <3

---

I already tapped on the Multiverse part, I just find it quite funny how we experienced pretty similar interactions with the Multiverse and yet we have ENTIRELY opposite views on it, lol!

Like, I definitely went down that rabbit hole with your brother! And girl! Don't I love this absolute mess WHOLEHEARTEDLY!😂

And I gotta say, I DID read your linked post before we got here!

And I know this cause though I didn't fully agree, this part:

This part really, really resonated with me! DEEPLY!

Cause let me tell you, that's EXACTLY how I feel about Invasions Season 1!

Like, I HATE that shit! Screw that overly inflammable incel! That was NO Hanzo Hasashi!

And as creator of Scorpion!Harumi, SCREW THAT ENDING!! The only acceptable ending for that season would've been Harumi OBLITERATING fake Hanzo (Zanho, if you will)!

With that being said, I am actually glad it exists because being utterly furious about it was what led me to create the Scorpion!Harumi AU, and from it grew my interest in obscure characters and my frustration with how they were treated and ultimately came my mission to bring them all to the center stage!

Seriously, when I read that part in your post, I was literally like: YES!! YES!! SHE GETS IT!!!

---

But, I also have to confess, another thing you said that resonated with me was this:

And it pains me to say that reflects perfectly how I feel about Hanrumi😭

Like... they are cute! And the fanon work made from them is adorable!

But you know... I love Harumi. And I love Hanzo. And GOD! Never ONCE their relationship brought them anything good!

I mean, either she's dead, or he's dead, or this:

And like I said. I DESPISE this ending.

Scorpion!Harumi is literally trapped with a guy who looks like her dead husband and who will attack her have her not reciprocate his affections (as he has done before with another Harumi)

So that's why I don't mind the context Harumi was brought to MK1. I don't mind Kuairumi. Kuai is a nice guy, he is in love with her and being with him doesn't mean death penalty to her.

Plus! Being "the clan leader who will mentor her childhood friend/crush into becoming a clan leader himself" as is a much, MUCH cooler character description than "dead wife".

Soooo, yeah. When it comes to canon Harumi partners, I'm team Kuairumi ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

With that out of the way:

YES! it's so good to have these girls around! And we can only hope they finally receive the love they deserve!!🥹🩷

In the meantime, HECK YEAH! LET'S HAVE FUN!!!

[bracketsoffear]

Diana Christensen (Network) "Diana Christensen is, without a doubt, one of THE girlbosses of all time. She is the young vice president of programming for the fictional television network UBS and the way she got there is through cold-hearted ambition and ruthlessness. She has one drive and that is ratings. Throughout the film, she manipulates and exploits whoever and whatever she can, from the rage of the discontent American vox populi to a leftist militia to Howard Beale, the film’s protagonist, an unstable aging news anchor. When he threatens to kill himself on air, she sees a possibility for a rating spike. The population has gone cynical, they want anger, they want blood, they want someone who will tell them that the world is awful, and she knows that he’s her man. She exploits his breakdown for profit, his rantings raking in more and more viewers. She turns his show into a spectacle, getting it moved from the news division to her division: entertainment. Because that’s all it is now, entertainment. The circus in bread and circuses.

She is credited with restoring the network, winning awards, and being the decorated guest at industry galas, but she stays impersonal no matter her charm. She marketed Howard to the higher-ups as “a latter-day prophet, a magnificent messianic figure”, yet she doesn’t seem to believe what he says. To her, his worth is limited to that as defined by HUT and Nielsen.

But she knows audiences believe it. She doesn’t care about how this man is cracking, how his directionless angry, cynical message could affect the viewers, feeding into the country’s already unstable climate. No, it’s about the numbers. UBS is the only thing that exists in her world.

When planning for next season’s offerings, she sees potential in a communist guerilla group (think the Weather Underground meets the Symbionese Liberation Army) as an asset, a way to harness the leftist counterculture for capitalist gains. And she succeeds. She offers the group the ability to air their message for profit, tempting them into becoming just another of her capitalist puppets, and by the end of the meeting, they’re pouring over paperwork and ratings, and arguing distribution costs and audience shares with the network representatives. Just like that, the once-Marxist militia became another cog in the capitalist media machine, another asset for Diana to sell.

And when Howard’s show finally loses its novelty and the ratings slip, she decides to seize the moment to debut this new show with one sentence: “Let’s kill the son of a bitch.”

And finally, I leave you with a quote from Max Schumacher  (Howard’s best friend, her short-lived paramour, and the president of the news division whose job she rendered useless)  about her:

“I'm not sure she's capable of any real feelings. She's the television generation. She learned life from Bugs Bunny. The only reality she knows is what comes over her teevee set. She has devised a variety of scenarios for us all to play, as if it were a Movie of the Week. And, my God!, look at us, Louise. Here we are going through the obligatory middle-of-Act-Two scorned wife throws peccant husband out scene. But, no fear, I'll come back home in the end. All her plot outlines have me leaving her and returning to you because the audience won't buy a rejection of the happy American family. She does have one script in which I kill myself, an adapted for television version of Anna Karenina in which she's Count Vronsky and I'm Anna.”

This description has been edited for length. Here is the link to Diana's full description"

Hama (Avatar: The Last Airbender) "The episode she's introduced in is literally titled 'The Puppetmaster'. She describes bloodbending, the power she developed, as "controlling water in another body; enforcing your own will over theirs', and that anyone who perfects bloodbending can "control anything or anyone". Before her fight with Katara, she suggests that bloodbending is not a choice to be seeked, but something already existing. She also enforces her teachings on Katara, wanting her to be a successor even if it goes against Katara's morals"

[weirdcat1213]

Hi....If you don't mind me asking, can I ask, what are your top 7 favorite media (can be books/ manga/ anime/movies/tv series/etc) and your top 7 favorite (fictional) characters from any media? Why do you love them all? Sorry if you've answered this questions before......

Hello :D

omg i get to yell about things I like, exciting!

first im going to go with my top 7 in no special order cuz I would never be able to decide

Trigun (98, manga and stampede): I've talked WAY to much about this one but holy shit has impacted my life. The story, the characters, the pain THE SWEET SWEET PAIN MY GOD. It just mixes a lot of tropes/themes I really like. And we have 3 versions of it! How cool is that?

Steven Universe: again another classic. Discovered the show when I was young and it just grabbed my soul. Very formative and influential while I was growing up. So soft and p a i n f u l l as all thins should be :3. Plus the music is a banger. Like to this day ik songs from it. Favorite one is change btw.

Legend series (book series): no one paid attention to this series because it came out the same time as divergent and hunger games and other big titles. But I was! And it's still one of the best book series I've ever read. It totally has the 2013-2015 vibes (except for the latest one in the series, rebel) but it's....honest. not only because all the struggles in the book are real but also because the author really believes in her characters. She created them but also let them become people. Plus the writing is amazing and her description of specific moments and emotions UGH I have a huge post about it because of how cool it is. I still remember opening the first book and getting SLAPPED by the first line. Yes it's that good.

Signalis: newish game :D saw lesbians, saw violence and I was on board but I never thought the game would make me think and stare at the wall that much. So far I've played it 5 times and going for a 6th. It's so abstract and no one can decide on what's true or not but that's part of its beauty. Really clever and interesting game. Nothing is real, only lesbians with guns.

Our Flag Means Death: cool show that was about queer NOT IN THEIR TEENAGE YEARS??? IN THIS ECONOMY??? AND NOT ABOUT AIDS (sorry pose I still love you). Of course it won me over because of the queerness but also the characters themselves. It was nice to see myself in a lot of them, personality and racially wise. The fun gay pirates came to my house, destroyed my life and also gave me life. Easy as that.

Pose fx: don't like the main writer of the show too much but the rest of them ATE WITH THIS. A story about black queer woman PORTRAYED BY BLACK QUEER WOMEN. It deals with the aids crisis through the lenses of trans women and gay men but the thing in that show that blew me away was the love for femininity and the community they created around it. They actually took their abandoned and traumatized selves and became someone. They formed families that actual give support and I'm a sucker for found family. I've cried many times because I wanted Blanca to adopt me. 10/10 show about overcoming shit circumstances and the importance of community. What if I cried again.

Houseki no Kuni (manga and anime): weird manga that I've been following for YEARS because its so fucking good. The anime is beautiful and captivating af and honestly the whole thing needs to be analyzed by a Buddhist. it makes me want to learn about that religion so i can understand more. but yeah its sad, its hype, and once again its about gay rock MMM my favorite. you dont know the hours i spent looking for videos/animatic about it. hard to explain but i like to describe it as "human growth: the manga/anime"

Maybe it seems like I don't watch many movies and it's kinda true! I'm more of a shows person. but there are movies i like. maybe another day

Now onto my favorite characters but again I can't decide so this is in no special order. Also because I can't decide I'm giving the spotlight to characters that are not from the media mentioned above (for example if you dont see vash in here is because i yell about him enough like. 3 times minimum per month). Because I can. Because I'm normal about media and stories i like.

1.Steven (su): MY BOY MY MOON AND STARS. ok a lot of this list is about characters i relate to, but this one is the og. this mf is one of the kindest, awesome yet misunderstood characters of all time. theres so much rage and trauma in this little guy but there are many other feelings that get lowkey explored in the main show until BOOM the emotions explode in su future. its amazing how complex my son is. im so lucky that i got to grow up along side him in a way. and in another way it was nice to see myself kinda represented in him? fun times.

2.Tifa (ffvii): PRETTY RECENT BUT SHES THE COOLEST. ejem sorry. i love cloud, zach and the others from the game but tifa doesnt get the recognition she deserves. she survived so many tragedies and became stronger because of it. not only in body but also in mind. however she also became cautious and tries to not explode in front of others. she tries to be a safe place for people, even when shes scared. i think thats pretty admirable of her. i would say more but i dont want to risk spoiling the game but there are little moments and scenes where she just tries to be there for people because she has no one in her life anymore and fuck it makes me sad. also shes pretty hot-

3.Elektra (pose): MY QUEEN. shes just. evil sometimes. shes really a bitch to most of the characters but DAMN SHES COOL WHEN SHE IS. elektra knows she was born with a huge disadvantage in life so she grabs power like a mf and bites it. i kinda aspire to be that, to not let anyone get in my way. she just really speaks to the part of me that has bigger ambitions. but shes also smart and caring (when shes not being a bitch) and every time the world puts her down she stands up and kicks the world again. she's the power of femininity itself and yes i also think shes hot (i mean look at those cheeks of thunder) but shes like a fucking storm in a person and how i can not love that? We love poc people in power.

4.Phos (houseki no kuni): This fucking child (they're a child in my eyes) is so important to me for weird reasons. I got deep into hnk when I was in my sabbatical year. It was a time where I didn't know where I would go and phos seemed to be in a similar place. To this day it surprises me how ichikawa managed to create a "simple" character and then by all definitions made them human. I like their journey, the transformations they went through, the stages they went to cope or to confront their situation. Plus the design is pretty affff

5.Edward Teach (ofmd): I just.....really connected with this guy ok? The feeling of always being at the bottom so if you are going to rise your only option is to make people fear you but that's not true BOY HE LEFT NO CRUMBS WITH THAT WHOLE THING. he was just really cool when he entered the show and then it was "oh this guy is really fucked up actually" and he's so funny and MORE OLD POC QUEERS? FUCK YEAH. but i guess what puts him on top for me is how he explored himself and his needs. All that while being funny and tragic and gay. Really cool.

6.Anthy (revolutionary girl utena): MY DAUGHTER RRRRAAAAHHH. Anthy is a really tragic and complex character. to this day i cannot put together every reason why shes my favorite from utena. Shes tragic and my god the things she goes through break my heart every time I think about it but...shes also incredibly strong and funny and a weird keeping animals in her room. The creators did an excellent job showing her lack of agency and how she already had given up, but also showed her humanity and wish to retain things in her life that gave her joy. And movie anthy? That girl is a no nonsense girl. She will get her girlfriend no matter what from the people who abused her. She left that fucking school as a mature, smart and kind adult. We fucking stan.

7. Richard (requiem of the rose king): another recent acquired son. Idk why this one hit so much and honestly for how short the manga is (79 chapters) they did such a good job with him???? Banger themes and metaphors, banger character moments, banger GENDER moments. I've seen a few people not being able to take him seriously but idk, ir sounded honest and serious to me. A kid who has been told since birth they were a demon became one to survive but not really. Because no one with his wish can fully be a demon. Idk maybe it's cheesy but his quest for love and acceptance was a banger in my eyes (please read the manga. We can leave the anime behind). Also I like him cuz he's cool and is a character I CAN ACTUALLY COSPLAY THANK GOD-

AND THOSE ARE SOME CHARACTERS AND SOME PIECES OF MEDIA I LIKE :D IF ANYONE WANTS MORE PLS ASK.

[candycryptids]

5 songs I’m into right now!

Got tagged by @gatheredfates for this and it seems fun 🌸! So let’s get into it. I’ll provide YouTube AND Spotify links, because I use Spot but I know it can be a bastard and a fool.

1! Yoruwahonoka by Eve [Spotify Link] [Youtube Link] [YT link has some mild flashing] The opening has my favorite sound type; muffled music played in another room, and something that sounds like a can opening (a crunchy ka-chak noise, which the YT link is to the MV, and shows it actually a shutter, but so it goes!) it’s also a song on Ishi’s playlist, and I’d never actually looked at the English lyrics before but they kinda hit…. For *Kizuna* 🫢

i'm a kid waiting for a lonely star / knowing already that i wanted to be loved / at least when i'm looking up at the night sky / go start dancing and singing your goodbyes / until i beg you to stay

2! … A Ghost’s Pumpkin Soup by Tomoy, for Sonic Adventure 2 Battle 🫣 [Spotify Link] [Youtube Link] I, listen I don’t have much justification to offer for this, I close my eyes, I hear it in my head, uhm, I played a lot, A LOT, of SA2B. Hours on hours on hours. Over and over and over- and this was a level I spent a lot of time in (that, and Wild Canyon, whose soundtrack I ALSO enjoy, but it didn’t make the cut because I wanted this one on here more and if I used multiple songs from SA2B I wouldn’t have any other songs on here actually.) there’s no deep meaning behind it, I’m just. Very fond of the memories tied to it and the location (Pumpkin Hill, spooky, and full of cartoony ghosts and big Jack o lanterns and murderous ghost trains.)

3! Pagliacci Act 1: Recitar! … Vecci La Giubba By Ruggero Leoncavallo [Spotify Link] [Youtube Link] [Youtube does not seem to have the full version I’ve been listening to but I recommend the YT version anyways, seeing the singers genuine emotions and expressions of pure anguish is Elevating] Anyways, I am holding your hands, please listen to this song, opera has such a powerful sound to it, stories told through song is my favorite, and Opera gives me the full body tingles and sometimes when I can’t sleep it’s literally what I put on to help me sleep (wild, I know, given the intensity of it)

4! Like or Like Like by Miniature Tigers [Spotify Link] [Youtube Link]

“Tell me what you really think, do you Like or Like Like Me….”

Am I crazy into romance for myself? Not particularly, but I do like rotating Fictional Romances, and this song is��� CHEFS KISS, For it, ehehehe. Also, it just, I like the sound >_> It’s another ear-worm for me.

5! R U Mine? By Arctic Monkeys [Spotify Link] [Youtube Link] This song also loops round in my head the same way the Pumpkin Hill Rap tends to loop round my head- it just keeps being a banger that I enjoy, and since I first heart them I’ve liked the Arctic Monkeys Sound type. They fall in with PillowFight to me, but there’s none of their music on this list because I haven’t listened to em lately >_>;

You get a Bonus number 6! Because I feel kinda embarrassed putting opera on here but not too embarrassed to take it off.

Race Car Ya-Yas by CAKE [Spotify Link] [Youtube Link] The song fucks. CAKE slaps. Thanks for coming to my TedTalk. Please spend the sub-2 minutes it is to listen to this song. It is Absurd. I pay it rent every month. The land were you can’t change lanes/ Where Large, Fuzzy Dice / Still Hang Proudly Like Testicles from Rear View Mirrors…

So. Super normal line up of songs. Please enjoy. I kept XIV music off or that would just be the only music on here XD and I tried to pick stuff that actually had lyrics….

Anyways. No obligation! But I am curious, what’re five songs you’re into, @cindernet-explorer @this-is-ris @oneiroy @becquerelnoir and ! @zombiesockfuckinglovescardfight

[coffeewithcutcaffeine]

I need to know more about Voievod! How long have you been working on it? How do you find the balance between storytelling and providing historical information? I'm about to start reading it, and I'm so interested in the process! Bonus question: do you have any playlist or type of music you associate with it?

Oh my God, thank you so much for dropping this into my in box, loveliest! This really makes my entire day. 🥹❤️ Please, excuse my ramblings if this gets too long sksksk.

First of all, thank you so much for giving my fictional monolith a chance! I appreciate it more than words can say and hope you will find it enjoyable! ❤️ I also do think that it is important to mention that it tackles a lot of dark and gory themes so, please, always check the trigger warnings first — some works are not that heavy, but others might be more explicit and graphic in nature, so never hesitate to skip some of them if you find them uncomfortable.

Now on to your questions!

How long have you been working on it?

Voievod in its current form is actually my third attempt, but I have been playing around with Vlad’s story for nine years now. I started working on my first story in 2015, but that was a blend of Vlad the Voivode and Dracula the Vampire — basically, it focused on how he became a vampire. I eventually abandoned that project because I did not really have patience with it and kept rewriting and re-editing many parts of it, and maybe it was a good thing I did because I gradually came to realisation that his character as a mortal man is so much more interesting than the vampire thing.

I tried to give it another shot in early 2020, this time focusing fully on Vlad as the historical figure. The first wave of COVID granted me a lot of free time, so I tried to use that opportunity to work on the story, as well as catch up on any new information from historical research. I wrote a few drafts but abandoned it again after a few months because I sincerely felt like I did not have enough writing experience to pull it off in a way I would be satisfied with.

I started working on the third and current version in February 2023 — I randomly revisited the old drafts from 2020 and started playing around with them a little, expanding the ideas until I managed to write two pieces I was quite proud of. I approached this with a great deal of respect and fear, then realised that I felt confident enough in my writing to perhaps try again. I think it was a good decision to wait and get enough writing experience before getting back to it because, looking back at my previous attempts, my world-building and characterisation have improved. Still, I am taking this as an opportunity to push myself and let myself grow — and every new piece is quite the lesson as I am often plunging into places I thought I would never dare before.

How do you find the balance between storytelling and providing historical information?

I think the hardest part of working on such a project is the research itself. To depict the historical events as accurately as possible, you have to read anything you can get your hands on and absorb as much as possible. I have loads and loads of files filled with notes on figures, events, culture, etc. not only for one but four separate countries as all of them are crucial for the work. Vlad’s story is even more specific because you really have to separate facts from all the debris and junk of propaganda against him that shaped what was known about him for a long time.

Once you become intimately familiar with the research topic and can swim easily through that sea of information, it is not that hard to find that perfect blend. In fact, having that historical information at your disposal really speeds up the process because you do not have to agonise over the plot — all those events are already there, you just follow them. When it comes to many characters from Voievod, we know what their life was like and what their personalities were, so I follow their lead in that regard. And it is fascinating because real life sometimes writes the most compelling stories.

What balances this out is the freedom other aspects give me. We usually come to know historical figures as legends and larger-than-life beings, and they were undoubtedly extraordinary, but they were people first. I get to breathe that humanity into them by depicting what they think, feel, desire, and fear. I make them make mistakes and laugh. There are also people in their lives that we know little or nothing about, so that gives me a lot of space to create characters from scratch — Cătălina is a perfect example of that, and I love having the opportunity to create such a rich and wonderful character. Ultimately, personal relationships give a lot of space to create dynamics as I please, because we know so very little about the private lives of these people.

Do you have any playlist or type of music you associate with it?

Ahhh, I love this question so much! Here is my opportunity to share my beloved baby lmao. 🤭

I have a “soundtrack” playlist on Spotify, which you can find here. I love visualising scenes and playing them in my head like little video tapes, and the right music helps me grasp the mood and emotion of those moments when writing them. Almost all the tracks are actually tied to specific scenes or works. (One is already published and bears the same name. *wink wink*)

Also, as a bonus (let me brag there for a second), here is a Pinterest board for some of the characters from Voievod. ❤️

[sward-iak]

Intro Post!

Hello! Some of you may know me from somewhere else, and to that (unless you're a super close friend of years now) I say nay! You do not!

I am a in my 20s concept art/writer hobbyist. I work a full 40 hours with week, sometimes with overtime (so if I'm MIA, that's why!). When I'm not at work though I thoroughly enjoy reading, writing, drawing, playing video games, and hanging out with my family/friends!

Writeblr/Main: @sqeedledob

Request Info

I've been getting some DMs about my requests so hopefully this will clear things up! Commissions are always more of a priority than requests, and people who Donate to my Ko-Fi are my second priority. Requests will be completed at my leisure.

Primary Requests: CLOSED

Primary requests are in my typical style and can range from concept art to simple illustrations. These requests are actually colored and finished to varying stages just depending on how I'm feeling. I try not to spend more than a week on a request but if I'm really vibing with it, I'll probably finish it

Examples of what you can expect for a primary request

Sketch/Ask Box Requests: OPEN

Sketch requests take me a max of 20 minutes and I usually use them as a means of warming up. So if you'd rather quick art of an OC or character instead of something that could take anywhere from a few weeks to a few months, this is the way to go! These are only accepted through the Ask Box and MUST include a reference!

Examples of what you can expect for a Sketch/Ask Box

Below the cut are rules/expectations for requests, thank you guys for reading!

Also because a few people had asked for this, I am going to link my Ko-fi. There's no pressure to tip, I do all of this for fun, but if you want to I won't stop u! xD [Click here for da Ko-Fi]

PRIMARY REQUEST RULES

This is a request, not a commission. I will take the requester's input in mind when drawing, but I will not do revisions

Any fandom, cross over, and oc is welcome. I will do my best to characterize/draw them even if I'm not into the fandom myself, and you might just introduce me to my new favorite show/book!

NSFW requests are allowed, however keep in mind:

- I WILL NOT draw beastiality/Zoophilia - I WILL NOT draw Loli/Lolita or anything related to CP - I WILL NOT draw Furry NSFW. I have nothing against furries, furry NSFW just personally makes me uncomfortable and I do not like looking at it much less drawing it (this includes Ponies) - I WILL NOT draw anything for a franchise that is directed toward younger audiences, ie: anything rated PG or TV Y7 (PG-13 is Acceptable, DEPENDING ON THE FRANCHISE. ie: Marvel) - I WILL NOT draw Non/Dub Con, or anything that would cause someone to use the Dead Dove tag - I WILL NOT draw irl people in NSFW situations, ie Youtubers, Streamers, etc. Fictional Characters only IF A REQUEST SHOULD MAKE ME UNCOMORTABLE I fully reserve the right to Deny it, even if it is not on this list

If you do make an NSFW request, I will make a SFW version to post and send you the NSFW privately. I try to limit how much NSFW I share on this account

I can draw anything from landscapes to robots, humans to creatures. (Just cause I won't draw NSFW of furries or Ponies doesn't mean I won't do SFW art of them!) I fully enjoy testing the bounds of my artistic abilities and I invite people to help me challenge them!

Humans, robots, furries, dragons, anything. Put anything in here.

And to reiterate: Primary requests can take a while, especially since my queue is pretty long right now! I will make another post when my Queue opens up a bit!

In progress (Commissions): Tank (Color Picking) Simon (Line Art Clean Up) Wolfie (Sketch) Surplus (Sketch) Beth (Sketch) In Queue, not started (in order): @frlituj @jessica199616 @we-dont-talk-about-potato-nonono @lovablenatsume @princeasimdiya12 @airfriedfruitcake @hallwriteblr

Sketch/Ask Box Requests

This is a quick request to help me warm up and will usually take max 20 minutes. So it'll be fast/messy!

Any fandom, cross over, and oc is welcome. I will do my best to characterize/draw them even if I'm not into the fandom myself, and you might just introduce me to my new favorite show/book!

NSFW requests are not allowed for this one, just so I can keep it simple and quick without having to put too much thought into it

Humans, robots, furries, dragons, anything. Put anything in here.

[zartophski]

4 5 19 23

4. What's a word that makes you go absolutely feral?

I know there are words that make me go feral but I am drawing a blank rn. I'd know one if I saw one.

5. Do you have any writing superstitions? What are they and why are they 100% true?

If I don't write the entire fic before I post the first chapter, it will not be finished. You know the evidence already.

19. Tell me a story about your writing journey. When did you start? Why did you start? Were there bumps along the way? Where are you now and where are you going?

I've always been writing. I liked playing make-believe as a kid, and probably held onto those stories a lot longer than my peers. I thought the worlds in stories held so much wonder and possibility and more interest than the world I lived in. So when my peers became too old to play pretend with me, I turned to writing to continue to create those stories and exist within them.

I remember two books that got me interested in writing myself. One of them was called Sparrow Road, which was about a girl who spent the summer at an artist's retreat and met all these different artists who were working with different mediums to tell their stories. It was a place I wanted to go to. I can't remember the name of the other book, but it was about two girls who met in a treehouse by a river near their houses. They gave each other nicknames and wrote a book together and won a competition and got to travel to a University to take a summer writing workshop together. The two of these books left a big impact on me, not only by being good stories, but by showing me that people like me could write.

So I started writing. I wrote fanfiction before I even knew the name of it, mostly small scenes with a cooler version of me inserted into some cinematic universe with all my favorite characters from all my favorite media going on adventures together. I've always liked writing for large casts.

But I also wrote my own fiction. My seventh grade homeroom teacher was also an English teacher at the high school, and he was very kind to proofread and provide feedback on my scifi book I was writing. Looking back on it is embarrassing, but his encouragement meant I didn't stop writing.

Once I found out about fanfiction I pivoted more towards that. And that's been my main form of creative writing since early high school. Getting feedback and building a community around writing has been very encouraging for me, and I have definitely improved since I first stepped into the fanfic scene. But I'm also too scared to try and jump back to original works. Fanfic is hard because I eventually run out of what to say, but original work is hard because I never know what to say to start with. Right now, TML is the balance between for me, because it gives me more freedom on what to say and do without completely leaving the framework of another work. But that's got it's own difficulties, mainly the loss of a wide feedback group. Which would be completely gone if I jumped to regular original work. Ideally I'd like to publish something someday, but it's too far off for me to see how I'd get there.

23. Describe the physical environment in which you write. Be as detailed as possible. Tell me what's around you as you work. Paint me a picture.

couch

[consolecadet]

10 First Lines Game

Tagged by @specialagentartemis (thanks for thinking of me!)

“Rules: share the first lines of ten of your most recent fanfics and tag ten people. If you have written less than ten, don’t be shy and share anyway ❤️”

At Artemis' suggestion, I'm playing fast and loose with the rules and including original fiction too. I feel like I don't talk about my writing in much detail and many of these projects are not online, so I've included some context!

When Gareth Last gets to the top of the stairs to his office on Germantown Ave, someone is already standing there, waiting. “Latent Defects”, last worked on today. Latent Defects is a bi 1980s detective novel I started during NaNoWriMo 2018 and have been working on since. I don’t want to jinx it, but I think I’m getting close to a version I'd be comfortable asking for feedback on! HMU if we're mutuals and you want to read a 350-page manuscript soon (realistically a few months from now).

Kim closes his Mnemotechnique A6 and aligns his pen beside it on the desk. “Boot Black”, last worked on today. I started writing this fic about an undernegotiated BDSM scene between Kim Kitsuragi and Harry du Bois in February because of an intoxicated tag I left on this poor, unsuspecting artist’s drawing of Kim Kitsuragi. It's nearly finished.

He shows him the picture. “Rabbit Vector.” “This is Not a Virtual Simulation”, last worked on March 2023. This year I started outlining a new version of a very old cyberpunk heist novel project. I'm still in the R&D phase, but I did write a first line (or two).

PROBLEM: Lieutenant Kitsuragi seems repressed. “Thought Acquired: Manic Pixie Dream Detective”, finished February 2023. I wrote this Kim/Harry short in the style of Disco Elysium’s Thought Cabinet. An amusing exercise.

It doesn’t feel right to be back at the new school in Trenton so soon, after spending last night watching the shamash until it went out with his siblings. “That’s How Accidents Happen”, finished October 2022. A Latent Defects short about the love interest Luke Whittaker’s adolescent crush on his high school shop teacher.  

The first 30% of Hermann’s flare came from his and Newton’s ill-advised drift with the Kaiju fetus. “It’s the Weather, You Imbecile”, finished September 2022. After joining AO3 and revising my old fics to upload them there, the spirit of 2013 possessed me to write this Pacific Rim porn.

At Goodwill in boy mode, I watch for other shoppers in the mirror above the racks. “#191970 Midnight Blue” for The HTML Colors Zine, finished April 2022. I had a blast writing ten 50-word stories inspired by HTML colors for this zine I found out about on Twitter. Artemis also has some work in here!

A man tried to sell me a daydream today. Adaptive Daydreaming”, last worked on December 2021. One of a few ideas I have in a universe loosely inspired by William Gibson’s “simstim” technology (my version is a device called the SenShare). This one is also inspired by bullshit-artist corporate coaches.

He’s glad he’s sitting on the exam table, because the patterned cotton johnny is too small. “The Transformation”, last worked on January 2021. This was going to be a short story about a doctor dismissing a fat character’s strange symptoms, which turn out to be the lead-up of the character turning into a terrible (yet awesome) monster.

Connor remembers enough to know it wasn’t her fault. “Neural Feedback Loop”, finished/last worked on September 2020. Another SenShare device story. In this one, a cyclist disabled by a car accident takes revenge by using the SenShare to force the pain of her injuries onto the driver.

What have we learned today?

Unlike Artemis, I rarely if ever start a story with a line of dialogue

Despite my best efforts, ~70% of my recent work features a man as the main character

Most of the fanfiction I write is porn, while most of the original fiction I write is not

I tend to start with a zoomed-out generalization, a habit I do not love about myself

Please consider yourself tagged if you want an excuse to share, but I'll also tag @cryptiq @sealcontent @absolutely-basted @animeisgod @tadpoleconspiracy @definitionsfading @saxifraga-x-urbium with the general directive of "I'd love to hear about any category of writing you're working on, but no pressure".