#because none of this is new; norman is just surfacing a lot of things that have hitherto been difficult to pinpoint or discuss

[thevalleyisjolly]

Ok.  I want to step back from the brain slug ethics for a moment, and talk about Norman Takamori more broadly as an East Asian character and what that means both in general and for this show.  Because if you look at the role that Norman has occupied this season, it embodies quite literally how (East) Asian characters often get treated in Western media and by Western fans, and it’s a useful framework to move into thinking about how we in this fandom engage with East Asian characters.

I’m not going to do a whole rundown on Orientalism and tropes because I’ve already discussed that extensively in other posts, and you can read Edward Said’s original text for yourself here.  The salient point I want to bring forth from those discussions is that Asian characters in Western media often get reduced to certain tropes (e.g. quiet and submissive, cartoonish sidekick, sexy fantasy), or more recently, are required to be “positive” representation for their communities (which translates to absolutely perfect and badass, a few surface flaws but nothing truly dislikable or bad).  

Nor is this limited to creators and production companies.  Even when there is a complex, nuanced, or antagonistic Asian character in media, fan engagement often ranges from ignoring them and relegating them to the background, to flattening them down into a few shallow characteristics and tropes.  If they were likeable originally, that’s all they’ll ever get to be (options range from “uwu cute” to “who needs a personality when you can be badass”).  If they were unlikable, then they either become reduced to a one-dimensional villain role or it’s “we’re going to invent a whole new character with the same name that’s likeable and/or “redeemable” according to our personal standards.”

The gist of this is that for those of us who live in a Western society or who are immersed in its cultural output, it’s common for Asian characters to be dismissed or reduced to tropes in Western media and fan spaces, and their bodies treated as a commodity, something to entertain us or for us to manipulate and puppet around as we please.  Just take a look at Kpop twitter if you want a particularly egregious real life example, but it happens to greater or lesser degrees in nearly any fandom with Asian characters in it.

(And yes, this is something common to many marginalized communities.  This particular post will specifically focus on the context of East Asian diaspora communities because Norman is Japanese-”Americadian” and Zac is Japanese-American and I personally come from an East Asian diaspora though I am not Japanese)

So what does this have to do with Norman?  Well, there’s no question that Norman is certainly not a nice or likeable man.  Which is why, from an in-game perspective, when the ‘nicer’ Valdrinor took over, everyone was happy about it!  Now we’ve got someone that people actually like and get along with...but through stripping away Norman’s agency and identity.  Of course no one likes being around assholes and Norman is definitely an abrasive and demeaning asshole, but that’s also the point.  He isn’t nice and he isn’t kind, but that’s who he, Norman Takamori, is.  

Norman Takamori is a messy, complicated, unlikable character who has had everything difficult or unpalatable about him taken away, along with his agency, and who has been replaced by a “nicer,” more more compliant character that puppets around his body, mimics his identity and literally does whatever he’s told by other people.  Starting to sound familiar?

Now, I am definitely not going to argue that this was a deliberate character choice.  But I do think that the parallel connections you can draw between Norman/“Skip” and the general treatment of Asian characters in Western media are a useful device for us to examine how we ourselves treat East Asian characters in this fandom.  Because it could be better.  It really could.

There are two sides to this conversation - how the show treats its East Asian characters, and how fandom treats East Asian characters.  To start with the show, there have been some ups and downs.  I’ve praised D20 in the past for NPCs such as Jackson Wei, Cindy Wong, and the Shen family, and for some absolutely stellar performances by Erika and Zac with characters like Danielle and Ricky.  There have also been a few missteps.  The whole “white saviour” story line in TUC II with the Order of the Concrete Fist springs to mind, as does the uncomfortable tendency for the official art to depict every single East Asian character with pale skin.

This season in particular has also had its ups and downs.  I personally like Ronnie Kwan and Auma Liu, I think they’re interesting characters and fairly nuanced for a supporting NPC.  I don’t love how the narrative and the mechanics enable the PCs to consistently disregard Norman’s agency.  It’s not that the PCs made the decision to ignore what was going on with the brain slug in the first place, because this is not the “lawful good” campaign.  But it’s things like constantly emphasizing how bad/incompetent Norman is, right before or after the PCs get a payout or in-game bonus.  It’s things like making the surgery not a risk to Skip, only Norman, and framing Skip as the most important person in the situation when the point of the surgery is to access Norman’s memories and it’s Norman’s body which is at risk.  It’s things like only presenting the negative parts of Norman’s backstory and highlighting the bad/pathetic elements of his character when even antagonists get moments of admiration or intrigue.

As for fandom, I and other fans have written a lot about how fandom treats D20’s East Asian characters, especially Ricky, so I won’t go back over that now.  There’s your usual problems -whitewashed art, ignoring or simplifying East Asian characters, objectification, etc- and things like double standards and viciously defending white faves against those “mean Asians”.  Cody and Ricky, and Evan and K spring most readily to mind.

Then there’s everything about Norman.  The problem with fandom and Norman Takamori is not the brain slug story line by itself.  I emphasize that Zac wanted to explore this story line, and that Asian people should be allowed to explore stories and characters without having to worry about whether they’re being “positive” representation.  I also point out that brain slugs are a science fiction trope for a reason, that the science fiction genre is partially designed to ask difficult ethical and philosophical questions that don’t have a “right” answer, because the point is not the answer, the point is how you got to your answer.

The problem, then, with fandom and Norman Takamori is that we hold him to a different standard than we do with other characters.  It’s the dichotomy of excitedly cheering on Sid’s journey of self discovery and self-determination, and then talking about how Norman “deserves” to have his bodily autonomy violated, or how it’s the “best thing” that could have happened to him because now people like “him,” because it’ll “teach him a lesson.”  We’re willing to hop onboard the potential of rescuing/redeeming Barry Nyne from a brain slug, an NPC who’s also behaved with hostility towards the PCs, but won’t even consider it for Norman because he’s “mean” and “deserves” what happened to him.  We watch in delighted awe as the party helps Gnosis and goes to extensive lengths to respect their choices and encourage their free will, all the while ignoring Norman’s right to autonomy.

Sure, but it’s just because Norman is a jerk, right?  We don’t like him because he’s an asshole, not because he’s Japanese.  And that’s very true.  Norman’s an unlikable asshole, and that has nothing to do with his race.  What does have to do with his race though is, again, the double standards.  We may not dislike Norman because he’s Japanese, but we do hold him to a different standard compared to white characters, and we are quick to dismiss him as an unpleasant, miserable man after a single episode that was mostly combat.

Consider: this season is arguably the least “heroic” out of all the D20 seasons.  Characters come from complex backgrounds, and make morally grey decisions.  We accept this, this is part of the story and the setting.  So why is it that when the other characters make dubious decisions (e.g. the non-consensual brain surgery), we excuse them by saying that it’s a rough story setting and these characters are proldiers who have already made many morally grey decisions, but when Norman, who lives in the same story setting and has also made morally dubious decisions in his past, behaves badly, we take that as “evidence” that he deserves to have bad things happen to him?

"But the other characters mostly did stuff to NPCs, and Norman was mean to the PCs, whom we actually care about!”  Yes, and Norman is also a PC.  Sure, he hasn’t been around much, and you can rightfully dislike how he interacted with other PCs, but he is also a PC, and the other PCs have consistently denigrated and dehumanized him throughout the season.  You can certainly say that this comes from understandable frustration with a horrible boss, but it doesn’t change the facts of their behaviour.  Why do we allow the party the benefit of context, that their boss treated them badly, but we do not allow Norman the benefit of context, that a lot of his bitterness and insecurity was exacerbated by his experiences within the Space Brigade?

I am not here to attack the cast or the PCs, or to justify/defend Norman’s behaviour.  Norman is absolutely an unpleasant jerk who chose to take out his personal issues on his crew, and that’s on him.  I would not like him if he was a real person, and I don’t condemn people for not liking him.  Nor am I saying that all the characters are bad and that we should be criticizing everything they do.  But the way we in the fandom talk about and treat Norman surfaces some unconscious racial biases in the fandom.  I am not saying that you are a bad racist person if you don’t like Norman.  Nor am I saying that this is conscious, deliberate, or malicious.  But there is a pattern in this fandom of holding East Asian characters to different standards than white characters, and it’s something we need to be more aware of and examine more critically. 

Also, you don’t have to like Norman and you don’t have to like that he’s a middle aged man whom we presume is straight, but you cannot ignore that he is a man of colour when you talk about him.  I’ve seen quite a few jokes and comments taking aim at Norman’s age, gender, and sexuality, and it’s true that certain aspects of his identity would give him certain privileges in our world.  But especially when you’re a person of colour, your race affects how all aspects of your identities are viewed and treated by others, even in areas where you might hold privileges.  A cishet man of colour does not have the same privileges and experiences as a cishet white man, is not viewed in the same way.  Certainly, Norman and the in-game setting of A Starstruck Odyssey are fictional.  But the world that we live in is not, nor is the way we engage with racialized characters.

Again, the issue is not with the brain slug story line itself.  Could we be having more conversations about its implications for autonomy and consent?  Yes, that’s the whole reason why it’s a trope in science fiction.  But the issue is not with the concept of brain slugs, the issue is in how the show is managing the execution of that story line and in how the fandom is engaging with it, particularly with the context of Norman being Asian and the fandom’s history with Asian characters. 

There’s room to improve for everyone.  This is not an attack, it’s a call to do better.

[realm-sweet-realm]

Sanctuary

Request from Threadedsafetypin: a story about Jack helping Sammy to recover from ink infection.

---

Most members of the Joey Drew Studios music room knew that Sammy behaving strangely was status quo. So, when was Sammy first infected with ink, few people were alarmed. Complaining about seeing Bendy in his sleep? Stress. Increased irritability? Stress. Spacing out more often, seeming more exhausted, looking more drawn and bedraggled than usual? Poor guy really has to get a grip on his life- but at least he’s still functioning well enough to get the songs out on time.

Jack Fain, Sammy’s best friend, was the only one who realized that this wasn’t just one of Sammy’s episodes. He’d confronted Sammy about it a couple weeks ago, and it hadn’t gone well. He had snapped about his health being his own business and told Jack to go away.

Jack was used to Sammy being irritable, so he didn’t take it personally. “Okay. I can’t help you if you’re not ready. Just know that I’m here for you when you’re ready to talk. I care about you, and want you to be okay. Alright?”

Sammy had grumbled an “alright,” and left. His symptoms had only worsened since then, and Jack was rather worried that Sammy would never be “ready”- at least, not until he was very ill. But he couldn’t think of any way to help the process along unless Sammy was on board as well.

Then, one day while Jack was working in the sewers, he heard footsteps. Only Sammy knew that he hid away in the sewers, so it had to be him. Jack got up to meet him, and saw that Sammy had a defeated look on his face.

“Remember when you said to come to you when I was ready? Well, I’m ready,” Sammy said, as though admitting a dark secret. He took off the white gloves he’d taken to wearing lately, revealing ink-black hands. “The ink did this to me, and tried to convince me that it was a good thing, but I can’t deny that this is a problem anymore. I don’t think that a hospital could help me, and I’m scared that Joey would kill me if it got out the public. I don’t know what to do.”

Jack stood stunned a moment, looking at Sammy’s hands. They clearly weren’t just stained, but tainted down to the bone. It looked like there were some pockets of ink just beneath the surface as well.

“It’s okay. I’ll find out what to do,” Jack promised.

---

“Norman, can you come with me for a minute?” Jack asked. “I need to ask Mr. Drew something he won’t enjoy answering, and I’m hoping that if you’re there next to me, he won’t kill me on the spot for it. Alright? All you’ll have to do is stand there. And you’ll probably get some nice secrets out of it.”

Excited at the thought of listening in on such a conversation, Norman agreed, and the two of them made their way to Joey’s office. The door shut loudly.

“Joey,” Jack began, in a tone one might use to calm down a wild animal, “someone I care deeply about is infected with ink. Now look- I don’t want trouble. I don’t have any personal reason to want your secrets to get out. Please tell me how to help him get better, and I’ll do it completely inconspicuously if it’s possible.”

---

“What did he say?” Sammy asked. The look on Jack’s face wasn’t especially encouraging.

“Well, he said that a hospital can help you- if we take you a couple miles from New York, first. He said that the ink is alive in you, and it needs to be taken away from the ink machine in order to kill it. If we don’t do that, the ink will live in you no matter what anyone tries to do to get rid of it, and you’ll be in and out of treatment for the rest of your life- which would likely be a very short, unhealthy one. So, that isn’t an option.”

Sammy didn’t understand why Jack looked so hopeless at the thought of killing the ink. “Okay,” Sammy said cautiously, “That sounds doable. What else?”

“Well, the thing is that once the ink is dead, it won’t be able to help keep you alive, so all that tissue damage, organ damage, and dehydration is actually going to hurt you. Joey gave me some tips on how to increase the chance that you’ll end up at the hospital alive, but it’s still possible you won’t make it.”

Sammy was in shock. “I-I might die before I make it the hospital?”

“Yes. Joey said that you should go home and eat something with a lot of liquid in it. I take it you physically haven’t been able to drink anything but ink in a while, have you?”

“It’s been a few weeks,” Sammy admitted.

“He also said that we should lance any obvious deposits of ink before we head out. I can help you with the lancing. And... one last thing, Sammy?”

“Yes?”

“I quit this place, because it’s dripping with a deadly biohazard. I definitely suggest you do the same- especially if you’re in the habit of drinking ink, which Joey said you might be.”

Sammy sucked in a deep breath. “Please tell me that’s everything.”

“That’s everything.”

“Alright. Thank you, Jack. Honestly, thank you.”

The two went to Jack’s place, and with a knife, they set to work lancing any obvious deposits of ink. Sammy had them all over- on his legs, on his chest, his back, and some fairly severe ones on his hands. One by one, they were cut open, squeezed out, and bandaged. By the end, Sammy was in a lot of pain, and Jack’s bathtub was stained not only with substantial amounts of ink, but with a fair amount of blood.

“I don’t feel stronger,” Sammy admitted, looking down with his arms crossed over himself. “What if Joey gave us this advice to trick you into killing me? Or he didn’t understand how far along I was?”

Jack sighed. He’d made a good point, honestly. But Sammy needed comfort. “He didn’t lie. I’m sure of it. Just trust me, alright?”

“Alright,” Sammy replied.

“Do you want to stay over tonight?” Jack asked, “It might help you dread tomorrow a little less.”

“Are you sure you want me here? I’ll get ink and blood all over the place.”

“You will? Then we haven’t bandaged you up enough- you shouldn’t be leaking like that. And anyhow, don’t worry about it- it’s just one night, I don’t want you to go through this alone.”

Sammy agreed to stay over, though all he wanted to do was wash off and rest. The next day, the two of them headed out of New York in Jack’s car.

“Alright, Sammy, you know the drill. Tell me when you feel the ink dying, and I’ll turn the car around as quickly as possible.”

Sammy nodded. It was only a few miles before he did.

“Now,” Sammy croaked. He was already looking greener. Jack found a place to turn around and took it. 

 “Everything hurts...” Sammy complained. It was true. He felt weak and heavy, as though a large percentage of his body had suddenly become dead weight. His lungs stung, and when his breathing was wet and slightly laboured. Pain was building in his head, in the cuts he’d given himself the day before, and especially in his organs. 

“It’ll be okay, Sammy. I promise. Just hang in there, and drink some water.” 

Though it was hardly his most overpowering sensation, Sammy was very thirsty. Jack watched with concern as Sammy took one of water bottles in weak, shaky hands, took a sip from it, and then fell forwards, entirely limp.

 Jack slammed his foot on the gas pedal. He was going about 85 miles an hour, and he mentally calculated that he’d need about eight minutes to get Sammy to the outskirts of town and hopefully not too much longer to get him to a hospital. Risky as it was, Jack grabbed Sammy’s hand to check for a pulse. It was certainly there. A cop by the side of the road saw them, but let them go by- perhaps seeing that Jack was hardly doing this for pleasure. Thankfully, traffic was thin that day. Jack checked Sammy’s pulse again while at a stop sign- still strong, and pulled up in front of a hospital. He ran in, pushed his way past a line of people, and spoke to the secretary. “My friend is in my car. He’s unconscious and I have reason to believe that he needs immediate attention if he’s going to live. Please help him.” 

Within a minute, Sammy was being rushed in for medical attention, leaving Jack to wait in the lobby and fill out the necessary forms. Hours later, a nurse approached him. “You’re Jack Fain, the one who brought in Sammy Lawrence?”

 “Yes,” Jack answered.

“Well, Mr. Fain, we have some serious questions for you. What happened to Sammy? His condition isn’t exactly easy to identify.”

“His workplace is filled with a biohazard. He got infected and kept it secret for weeks. How is he? Is his condition stable?”

The nurse grimaced. “Stable, yes. He’s on life support, but we’ll be able to keep him alive. We’re not sure when or if he’ll wake up again since we haven’t been able to diagnose. Would you like to see him?”

“Sure,” Jack replied.

Seeing Sammy laying still as a corpse on a hospital bed, with three different IVs in his arm, a tube in his throat, and the beep of a heart monitor nearby, was not an encouraging sight. It moved Jack to tears. “Call me when he’s up. Or when it’s time to say goodbye,” Jack croaked to the nurse. With that, he left.

Jack spent the next few days fraught with anxiety. To make matters worse, the hospital had called Jack to ask where Sammy had worked and gotten infected. Jack had said he didn’t know, because he didn’t want to risk either of them being killed by Joey for leaking his secrets. If Sammy died, he’s have to wonder if it was partially on his own hands. Jack’s husband tried to reassure him that he’d done all that could be done, and Jack knew it was true, but it was still a scary time.

In what felt like weeks but was actually just a couple days, the hospital called Jack and told him that Sammy’s tissue damage seemed to be repairing itself and that he was responding well to treatment. Thankfully, none of his organs had been damaged enough to require a transplant. A week later, he was called to tell him that Sammy was awake again.

Seeing Sammy again was a massive weight off Jack’s shoulders. The dark spots on his body had shrunk significantly, and he looked much healthier, especially now that most of those tubes and wires were gone.

“Sammy. You’re alive.”

“Yep. I must be part cockroach because it takes quite a bit to kill me.”

Jack smiled. “Ha, yeah. The radio is calling you a walking miracle. Even though probably haven’t walked yet, since you just woke up.”

Sammy prickled. “No, I can walk. I’m not that weak!”

“Right, sorry. So, when you woke up, did they pepper you with questions on how you got into this state in the first place?”

Sammy took a quick look around the room to make sure no one was listening in. “Well, they asked me where I worked. I told them it was an ink manufacturing plant that I didn’t remember the name of. I think they bought it. Why, are people pestering you about it?”

“No. But I’ve been hearing about the investigation on the radio. They all want to know about the man who who somehow got several pounds of ink into his system and lived. As far as I can tell, no one suspects a thing about our old workplace, or magic. I think we’re free of it, buddy. I don’t think Joey is ever going to be in our lives again.”

Now Sammy looked like a weight had been lifted from him. “I had no idea how badly I needed to hear that until now.”

Over the coming weeks, Jack regularly visited Sammy in the hospital. He looked stronger every time Jack saw him. The news story died down without much fanfare. Sammy got out with a clean bill of health, and Joey Drew Studios gradually became a distant memory to them.

[twdmusicboxmystery]

Okay so sad news...they confirmed on twitter that TDog and Beth are not returning...they will be in a Christmas special on December 13th on TTD...I just...I feel so...gutted. I wanted to see her on the show...it upsets me that I got so excited and even teared up...like I was so BLISSFULLY happy and then

Yes, I’ve heard about and looked into this. And yes, I understand all the implications. The woman who put this on Twitter isn’t just a fan. She’s a TV writer who’s written for TWD in the past and has access to tptb. I get it.

But here’s the thing: a lot of us are still really skeptical about this. Since when does the show issue a retraction through a third part who has no say over executive decisions? That’s just not something they do.

Is our skepticism part wishful thinking, because we WANT to see Beth in the bonus episodes?

Of course!

But I think we also have some evidence to back it up. There have been times when truly false information was released. Many of you might not remember this, but false “sightings” of the actor who plays Dr. Edwards were reported during the filming of S6. It turned out to be a set builder who just looked a lot like him. And seriously, within hours (like 3) AMC officially reported who he was and that he was not Erik Jensen.

Another time, fake titles that sounded like they could be about Beth (I think one was called “The Bullet”) were put on imdB. Again, within hours, AMC had them pulled down and the real titles were released. 

I haven’t seen anything like that with this issue. (If someone has, please send it to me.) And I’m really not trying to imply anything about this Twitter-writer’s integrity, but we really are just taking what she’s saying at face value.

And look, I won’t sit here and demand everyone believe that we’ll see Beth in the bonus episodes. Maybe we won’t. If we don’t, that will be a bummer. But you guys know me by now. I’ll just roll with it. I’m just saying we haven’t heard an official retraction by Gimple or Kang about this, and that makes me suspicious. 

And you know, we have a really recent example of this as well. Remember a couple of weeks ago, the guy who plays Silas on TWB said Rick would be in TWB finale? I could tell he was goofing around, and didn’t really think Rick would appear, but after that, some interviews with Gimple surfaced in which he said not to count on that. 

So why have none surfaced on this Emily/IronE issue? Well, maybe they will or they have and I just haven’t seen them. Fair enough.

But as one of my IG followers put it, “maybe it was a surprise that it was leaked so now they want to deny everything, although by unofficial sources so they can not be called liars later.”

Yeah. Word. Wouldn’t be the first time. *coughs* Negan’s victim *coughs*

I suppose the most relevant thing to keep in mind is that, even if we don’t see her in the bonus episodes, that doesn’t really change anything. 

It doesn’t change all the social media attention Emily/Beth has been getting. 

It doesn’t change that Norman reposted that white church from S5 a few days ago. 

It doesn’t change the template I saw in TWB, which I explained HERE. 

It doesn’t change that one of the Grady actors addressed TD after Rick’s departure, telling us there might be room to breathe, now. 

It doesn’t change Emily’s plant story about how sometimes when  you think something is dead, it comes back to life. 

So yeah. If we don’t see her in the bonus episodes, that sucks. I’ll be disappointed, too. But it doesn’t change my belief that we’re VERY close to seeing her. Xoxo! 💖

[artnerd1123]

DTRH!AU Masterpost

Moving into a new post since I’ve got stuff actually organized!!! It’ll likely get an update from time to time. Apologies to those whom the read more breaks for ‘^^

Everything to do with this au will be tagged #dtrh!au or #down the rabbit hole au Individual characters are tagged with #dtrh![name] 

Here’s an AU PMV for starters! 

Let’s get this show on the road, shall we?

Putting this up here so it doesn’t get super buried- Here’s the fic(s) set in this AU! All Moving Pictures End 

The AU crash course: The premise behind the au is that everything takes place in a pocket dimension controlled by a black magic script. Joey Drew is the one who’s writing/editing this script, and his rewrites affect the world and the characters within it. His constant reshaping eventually twists the world from a sitcom genre to a horror film- hence the horror esque setting, creatures, and plot. The characters didn’t escape the rewrites’ effects either. They’re warped into corrupted versions of themselves. However, these characters end up becoming sentient after awhile. The first one of these to become entirely sentient is Henry. He’s currently the only one who’s all the way out of alignment. A toon gone rogue, if you will. He still goes along with Joey’s “plot,” but it’s more so he can try to reach the other characters than to keep Joey happy or unaware of his actions. His goal is to basically “wake up” the other characters, so they can all stop living in a hellish nightmare studio and actually try and make something nice out of their home. He’s extremely dedicated to his goal. 

Character time!!! toon trio refs / corrupted refs  butcher gang refs / corrupted refs  toon henry ref  toon sammy ref / corrupted sammy ref  toon susie ref / corrupted susie ref  toon allison and tom refs / corrupted allison and tom refs  joey ref / toon joey ref  toon norman ref / corrupted ref  toon bertrum ref / corrupted ref  toon and corrupted grant refs  toon jack ref / corrupted jack ref  toon wally ref / corrupted wally ref  toon and corrupted lacie refs  toon and corrupted shawn refs 

Character relationships/orientations 

Concept art, anyone? toon trio concept work (w/ bonus corrupted bendy n alice) corrupted boris/alice concept work (ft bonus hen) butcher gang concept work (w/ corrupted forms) henry concept work sammy concept work (and more henry) susie concept work joey concept work corrupted norman concept work toon norman concept work  throwing around lost ones ideas 

Misc stuff Henry, but Goop™  Susie and Studio Tea™  Hey Henry, how do u feel about Joey?  Yo hold up, hen and polk are a thing???  Henry’s glasses saga  Regular studio shenanigans 

FAQ: 

How many of the employees are gonna show up? Hopefully all the named ones in the game! Once they’ve got a design, they’re guaranteed to show up somewhere.

Are they really carbon copies of the employees? Is there nothing different about them and their irl counterparts? They started as carbon copies! Latching onto their old traits and their old selves does help them come to their senses. However, different character development happens in script than IRL, so they end up different. Henry, for example, takes up the last name “Ross” when he wakes up (instead of his IRL counterpart’s “Stien”) to differentiate himself :0

So is everyone corrupted on purpose? Yes and no. Yes, because Joey chose to rewrite the script so much that it mangled characters, but no, because he didn’t intend to mangle them in the first place. It just kinda happened.

What makes them corrupted? Corruption is what happens when you can’t hold onto the core of what your character is, and get dragged into what the new script is telling you. It’s when you lose sight of who you are among all the chaos. People who are drawn farther away from their actual selves end up more monstrous. Susie (aka “alice” angel) is a great example of this. Bendy is too! Far be it from his real nature to be a murderous monster.

So can the toons be uncorrupted? Yup! Henry’s our model citizen this time. He looks more like a toon than a normal person, sure, but there’s nothing monstrous about him. That’s because he’s latched onto what makes him Henry. He’s not letting the instability of the world around him shake him up. Otherwise he’d be a goopy mess of ink.

Why’d Joey write everyone so differently that they corrupted? He’s actually very out of touch with people once he starts rewriting the script. Since his memories are getting foggy, he fixates on details that he can remember, and exaggerates them as needed. In fact, he’s hidden tape recorders around the script studio as built in reminders of these character traits.

How’d Henry wake up? And how does he plan on waking everyone else up? Ok… this is a longer answer. It all comes together, i promise. Jus hang with me. Whenever henry dies, he gets sent back to a sort of “first draft” stage. In order to get back to the world he’s supposed to exist in, he has to get through all the layers of ink Joey put down to get to his current script. As one can imagine… there’s a lot. So much so that Henry has to essentially swim to the surface. As he passes through all this ink, he can hear whispers of previous scripts. The deeper he is, the closer these whispers are to what the world used to be like. Seeing as Henry is the protagonist, he ended up dying… a lot. Like, a lot a lot. Joey had a lot of snags in the script to work out. All these times sent into the draft-y ink soup made made Henry slowly realize what was going on. He wasn’t mindless anymore. He knew what was up. After realizing that the world wasn’t right, it didn’t take him long to push for the rest of his consciousness. He plans on using what whispers and memories he can gather to bring everyone else back. He’s not dying on purpose, mind you, but he gathers as much information as he can to help everyone else realize that they’re not who they’re supposed to be.

Wait, memories? Does Henry remember the past scripts now? Not quite? He’s got a good enough memory stockpile to keep himself centered, but he doesn’t always know what’s up ahead as he heads through another studio loop. If Joey happens to rewrite or change around the script, those patches of Henry’s memory blip out of existence. Or at least get hazy. Hen can often tell if Joey’s changed something by how many holes he has in his memories.

Can anyone in the pocket dimension get out? Henry’s the only one who can get out! Joey literally wrote him a back door to the script. It used to be so he could talk to Henry whenever the “story” was over, but nowadays it’s just to judge how fast plot goes via how quickly Hen gets back. All Henry can manage to do is walk around and stare silently. And he can’t even stay out very long. Ink’s unstable in the real world. Gotta go back in n start the horror show over if u wanna live :/

Can Joey go in? Nope! Since he’s not made of ink, he can’t go in. He can watch tho!!! He does so via writing POV shifts into the script, and watches through whatever character it shifted to. Who needs cameras when u got the eyes of black magic toons n inky monsters ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ

Does Joey know Henry is sentient now? Nnnnot quite? He thinks the magic is being screwy with him. He can’t switch POV to Henry anymore, since the toon’s taken control of himself, and that’s real confusing since the writer doesn’t know what’s up. Plus, like mentioned above, Hen can’t exactly give Joey a sign once he gets out of the studio. Bummer :/

Is Joey gonna majorly rewrite the script any time soon? Nope. He’s to attached to his current plot to change the genre or anythin, so it’s gonna stay as is. With some changes here and there. One musn’t underestimate how many times u can change the order of scenes, or improve dialogue... 

AU Background:

((this is long as shiz, so get some popcorn slfkjs))

Y’all probably wanna know how this whole horror show started. I’ve got two words for ya: Joey Drew. Unsurprising! But he’s our starting point nonetheless. Joey Drew is the retired owner of Joey Drew Studios, a cartoon studio that ran itself into the ground after a decade or two of fantastical cartoons. Money problems aren’t kind to the entertainment industries. However, the studio was still his pride and joy! As are the friends who stuck by him or met him during the time it was open. He kept up with all of them through the years. They were like a little family. Unfortunately, time has a way of changing things. With his friends drifting away, living their own lives, getting up in years, or a combination of the three, Joey wasn’t doing too well. He was lonely. Feeling washed up. Missing the glory days, where he helped work on cartoon scripts instead of submitting horror and mystery shorts to local magazines. Not all that surprising that he turned to something else to cope. This thing being none other than occult magic. Because… of course it is. It’s a habit he’s had for years. Nothing like some demonic rituals to spice up the life of the creative mind behind kids’ cartoons! Especially fun when you’re a man with poor impulse control and a wild imagination. In any case, Joey summons the three main characters of his beloved cartoon series. Bendy, Alice, and Boris! (I refer to these three as the “toon trio.”) He was just as happy that he’d managed to bring them to life as he was to have them around the house. It was like having slightly unruly grandkids with toony superpowers. In other words, they were absolutely delightful!!! He took care of them and admired their antics. It was a great time. … until. Well. It wasn’t. Turns out things that don’t belong in this world get rejected eventually. After a few months, things started go go wayward. The toon trio had difficulties maintaining their forms, moving, engaging in tropes, and a ton of other things. They were miserable. Joey was understandably heartbroken to see this happen to his poor toons. So, like any good person, he tried to do the right thing: put them back on the paper they came from. It didn’t end up working exactly how he’d expected. Everything comes with a price when you mess with demonic ink. The magic not only created a stack of paper instead of a series of drawings, but latched onto an old fountain pen and Joey’s closet. If the closet thing seems odd, it is. But it’s a convenient place to hide ritual pentagrams! So, closet it is. Upon frantic examination of the papers, Joey discovered it was a script. A black magic infused script. Three names up top told him the toon trio were the only characters. A bit of experimentation led him to discover that the magic-infused pen was the only thing that could interact with the script properly. Further experimentation showed him that the script had made his closet into a pocket dimension. The contents? Whatever was in his new script. This is where the real fun begins. The new magic script practically floored Joey with awe. He had a world he could shape however he wished! He could run all those scripts he’d never gotten to put in production! He could watch his toons frolick! He could even use it to play with ideas he’d never gotten to explore. The possibilities were endless! 

((Of course, you might be wondering if Joey… y’know. Knew the toons were still alive. Because they were, they were just living in a pocket dimension now. In short? No. He didn’t. He carefully tested a few things with the script, just to make sure. All the toons did was what he wrote down. They moved like they were alive, but didn’t act that way. Plus, the dimension made them blank slates. They didn’t have any characterization in there to make them truly alive. So! For all intents and purposes? He saw them as you would any other character you write. A visual extension of his imagination. Ok mini rant over, back to the story--))

Playing with the toons was amazing. Joey hadn’t had fun like that in years! It was his little secret world, populated by his cherished toons. He could make believe whatever he wished. Eventually, though, loneliness started to catch back up to the old man. His friends… his family… life… it all went on. He just felt left behind. And what does Joey do when he doesn’t feel good? Not cope healthily, that’s for sure. Onwards to more occult magic! Only this time, he tries something… different. The toons were lonely. They deserved company. They deserved someone to take care of them. A familiar face. Maybe someone who helped Joey create them in the first place. Someone who’d just sent Mr. Drew an old letter and a card, since he hadn’t seen him in awhile… … someone like Henry. Using the magic pen, Joey traced over Henry’s note. Far from ruining the precious letter, it transferred “Henry” into the script. It’s not the real one! Basically a carbon copy, fresh from the time period that Hen first wrote the note in. Seeing as Henry’s letter came from around the time the cartoon studio was going strong, it’s an old version of him. But it was still Joey’s old friend. Just… toony. Toon Henry reacted just as his living friend would. If he wrote dialogue? He spoke it like Henry would. If he wrote some action? The toon put a classic Henry twist on it. Delighted, Joey returned to his script with renewed vigor. Toon Henry got to spend plenty of quality with the toon trio as the days went on. Thus began a trend of toonification. Missing one of his old friends? All Joey had to do was grab something with their old handwriting on it, and trace them into the script! There’s a carbon copy that acts just like the real deal! A fine compromise, right? … Right? Not exactly. It was fine at first. Joey made what could probably qualify as a sitcom-style story for the toony world to run on. His friends, at this point, all populated the studio. The premise was that the toons (now including the butcher gang!) had been summoned while he was still running the studio, and got up to hijinks with the rest of the employees. A hefty dose of actual studio drama- turned comedic, of course- kept the whole thing almost real. Joey even featured himself once or twice, but only in allusions, or a disembodied voice. He wasn’t about to let a carbon copy of himself have all the fun. It made him feel less lonely. More included. A fantasy world of never ending fun and heartwarming moments. How unfortunate it is that life doesn’t follow this pattern. Morality is a hard thing to come to terms with. So is sickness. Especially that of a friend. … it was just one rewrite at first. One alteration on a bad day. After all, using writing to cope is perfectly acceptable. One bad episode in the midst of sunshine doesn’t discount it all. One uncanny occurrence, though, doesn’t usually stay singular. It didn’t take long for the solitary rewrite to become two rewrites. Then three. Four. Six. Ten. Twenty. Fifty. More and more and more. Until the happy honey colored studio slipped into sinister sepia. This wasn’t the old script anymore. Not by a long shot.

The setting? A studio of shattered dreams.   Your protagonist? Henry. His goal? Survive long enough to escape.

~It’s quite th͝e̵͞͏ ͠M̕a͘sţe̛̕r͘p̕i̵͝e��ḉe̡̨͜~̡̛

[silyabeeodess]

Reflecting on BATIM: Chapter 5

I don’t really have any theories on Chapter 5, and there’s so much with the fanbase taking sides on this sort of thing that I don’t even want to really talk about them, but I do have a lot of thoughts that I feel like I have to get out of my head.  The biggest is that I, like a lot of other people, felt disappointed after the ending.  Not that the ending was bad, (Though it is incredibly annoying and insulting that people who like it want to say that people who didn’t “don’t understand or aren’t deep enough,” like they’re uncultured. No, honey, people have complaints for good reasons: You don’t get to invalidate them.) but that the overall chapter felt lacking. Now, I promise I’ll talk about more than just complaints in this--largely I’ll be bouncing off SuperHorrorBro’s own theories--but I have to get that out of my system first:

1.) We received a lot of hype at the end of Chapter Four and from the preview content for all of the new things that would be implemented into Chapter 5: New characters, new environments, new game mechanics, etc. And for all that we got to see... we barely had the time to see any of it!!  Maybe it was just too much to fit into the timeslot that they’ve been keeping to with the previous chapters, but I would’ve preferred a longer chapter or even waiting months for another one above barely scraping the surface of the new stuff. 

We got Allison Angel and Tom only to see them for that first, long cutscene that took about a fourth (a fifth at least) of the time it took to actually play the chapter, that one fight, and then a little bit at the end. The interactions with them felt rushed, because while Allison was on our side, Tom hated us, and then the next thing we know it’s, “Oh, you hate Sammy too? Here, have an axe. Yeah, bruh, we cool: Nevermind that we left you for dead and I tried to starve you.”  

The trailer made it clear how we would be navigating through flooded tunnels and we only got to use the boat once, granted it was a thoroughly horrifying experience.

We get to see where the Lost Ones are living, but just a small, little area that couldn’t even fill a town square. And not even the full square: I’m talking about that park-like area. “Well, it’s a studio, so it can’t be too big.” After several floors dropping into the center of the earth, I think we’re past that. Then, even with that big fight, we’re promised more chances to fight with Tom and Allison only to fall through the ground and have nothing to do with that ever again. I would’ve rather stuck with them and fought to Joey’s office that way it felt earned rather than play chicken with the Butcher Gang in that weird labyrinth of offices. (The labyrinth was bigger than the Lost One area... :,( )

Then Sammy.  Oh Sammy, I’ve never even really liked you, but you came out of nowhere after all this time has passed full of hints and Easter eggs in previous chapters to all the fans speculating how you’d be back, and then you’re dead just about as quickly and we learn little to nothing about you. 

2.) Ending that previous note with Sammy, I’m going a little further with him. In Chapter 2, the guy tries to sacrifice us (Henry) with the idea that Bendy will set him free if he does, then in Chapter 5... 

“Betrayed! Abandoned! I trusted you! I gave you everything and you left me to rot!” 

...Buddy, I seem to recall you wanting us dead: You don’t get to blame us for crap! If he was talking about Bendy, that’d be one thing, but then that raises some flags as to why he’s associating us with Bendy. I mean, no one else does and he didn’t at first. If he’s not associating Bendy, then he would have to be talking about Henry if he finally remembered him. And if he’s talking about Henry, then he could only be remembering him from a previous ring-around of the story (more on that later) in which Sammy possibly helped Henry under the idea that he was some kind of savior like Allison thought when she said she thought he “was the hope he’d been waiting for.” Seems unlikely, but that’s the only thing that makes sense to me for the 180 degree turn.

3.) Joey. Joey, Joey, Joey... I’ve been following BATIM with one thing primarily on mind: “If Joey isn’t in trouble, then he is going to be...” Whether it was Joey being the victim of his own, inky sins or it was Henry beating him over the head with a lead pipe, I wanted some kind of retribution. And what do we get? “You’re back already? Have a seat... It’s your fault I’m a terrible person because you didn’t stay, so do you wanna go back to your never ending nightmare?” Excuse me? Excuse m-Henry’s fault?! That’s worse than Sammy’s complaint card!!!  No. No! Joey, you do not get to sit around your house drinking coffee in a robe and bunny slippers, after everything you put everyone through, and blame it on Henry! Like, I realize the potential that none of what happened is even real from the storyboard on the desk and the real vs cartoon worlds, but that just makes it worse!!!  And here’s why:

4.) If none of it’s real and it’s just a story, then Joey’s still blaming Henry for all of his own terrible decisions running the company. If Henry’s dead and in some kind of purgatory created by Joey and the Ink Machine, then he’s literally suffering for Joey’s mistakes and getting the blame for them. And if our Henry’s a cartoon creation, then he’s not even the real Henry being blamed for things that Henry didn’t even do in the first place. That one line infuriates me more than anything else that Joey’s done, because it shows that he hasn’t changed at all: He’s still a complete monster!

Now, wrapping up and gearing toward actual analyses/theories, I actually want to bring up the one just released by SuperHorrorBro, as it makes the most sense out of anything else that’s been said.  If you haven’t seen it, you can watch it here:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nf234EJT3Fo

I see some potential for this theory. First off, because we know the Ink Machine does in fact exist after we see it in the final clip, but also because it would make sense for Tom and Allison to fit the more perfected versions of them that exist in cartoon form if they were invited back to the studio after everything had fallen apart.  One of my concerns in the past was that, if Allison replaced Susie, then why wasn’t Allison the first “Alice” made from the Ink Machine? Yes, the credits show the order in reverse, but we know the demented Alice is Susie due to her own words:

“Dreams come true, Susie... Dreams come true...”

Anyway, what would make Joey resort to turning to Susie after he had already stabbed her in the back and wouldn’t likely be able to gain her trust beyond simply relying on Susie’s clinging to the part? Well, if Allison and Tom had already left the studio--either because of its financial downfall, dealing with Joey, or from their getting married--then they would’ve dodged a bullet while the experiments were taking place. Tom didn’t trust Joey or like being at the studio, so it’d make sense for him to clear out asap. Women in the 30′s tended not to work if they were married in Allison’s case, and judging from her strong personality, I don’t think she’d put up with Joey long either, especially if he wasn’t paying her enough. As for Wally, I’ve got no idea, but I imagine some similar case for him as well--likely that he was let go (I can’t imagine the nearly broke studio keeping a janitor for long given that the place was always a wreck with the ink machine anyway and it’s was probably one of the “least important jobs” at the place in Joey’s eyes. That, and Wally personally sounded like a clutz.) or changed jobs.  

Another thing to consider is the prominence of just Wally’s and Allison’s letters. Not only as people who could’ve potentially ducked out, but also the last few people who Joey had to turn to. Wally had a carefree spirit, and Allison’s also got a nicer, more trusting nature to her as well. Given how we know that Joey is a sweet-talker--though snake is more like it--he could potentially trick them both into coming back at the studio where others who also avoided death would likely hold a greater resentment against him.  Then there’s Tom’s behavior toward Allison: Caring and protective. Like a husband would be toward his wife.  While it’s confirmed that many of the people at the studio have lost their memories, others still at least possess fragments of them: From Henry’s writing on the walls, to Susie remembering who she was and saying she knew why Henry was there at the studio, to the unnamed individual who “still remember their name.” Tom also remembers who he was--or at least his name--and possibly might remember Allison as his wife or at least at he loved her. Which is really tragic and dang it, I want more on this!!   Finally, there’s the fact that you can see names on the coffins that are in Chapters 1 and 2: Norman and Grant.  If it’s all fake, then it seems unlikely that Joey would’ve storyboarded those coffins specifically for those people and even more unlikely that Henry would know even if he did since there’s no names on them without checking Henry’s own messages.  That, and while there’s the parallel with Norman potentially being the projectionist, we have no idea what happened to Grant beyond the fact that it sounded like he was attacked based on his audio log. So how would Henry know who they belonged to?  By potentially checking them in a previous run. 

I also want to bring up a bit of potential with the storyboards we see in the real world. We assume that Joey drew them, but what if Henry did?  I mean, he’s the artist, and we know from Joey that he has stayed long enough before to ask questions.  What if, instead of all of the interactions being planned, at some point early on, Henry drew the storyboards as a means of coping through the horrors he faced? Henry might be numb to them now based on his lax take to events, but one means of people dealing with their trauma is often by using art as an outlet. This lets them describe what happened better than words could and also help them cope with it. Henry made have done the same.

There’s one thing that tosses a wrench into this and that’s how Allison comments how different Henry is from everyone else, not only in his potential to save them, but also how he can wade through ink without it “claiming him.” I mean, we assume anyway that he would’ve had to have been born from the ink like the others, but if that’s the case then the theory wouldn’t make as much sense.  Still, if he was resurrected in this way, then I do have another idea: If Henry’s one of the last people born from the machine, after all of these tests and trials and experiments, wouldn’t that mean Henry is its most perfect product? He could be more stable than the previous experiments, which would explain why he doesn’t melt into the ink and is able to reform quicker/more often than the others do. Maybe he can’t linger in it for long, but he can survive it for extended periods of time. In the very least, we’ve seen other characters than have been able to travel through the ink, like Sammy and Ink Bendy, so I’d leave it open that as one of the final victims, Henry would have the ability to endure the ink longer than the previous creations. 

I can’t think of anything else to say right now, so I guess that about covers it.  Thanks for sticking around this long if you did.

EDIT: Nevermind, I’ve got one more thing to say with the multiple runs!  The note that what Henry needs is “in the vault” and him later acknowledging that Bendy has to have it.  We assume it to be “The End” tape.  What this would allude to is that, at some point, the tape was indeed in the vault, but some point in another run, Bendy eventually got his hands on it and would know to retrieve it before Henry could, or otherwise made that weird prison/throne room for himself that somehow doesn’t reset like everything else... 

[imjustthemechanic]

The Stone Knight

Part 1/? - Two Statues Part 2/? - A Curious Interview Part 3/? - John Doe Part 4/? - Escape Attempt Part 5/? - Making the News Part 6/? - Fallout Part 7/? - More Impossible Part 8/? - The Shield Thieves Part 9/? - Reality Sinks In Part 10/? - Preparing a Quest Part 11/? - The Marvelous History of Sir Stephen Part 12/? - Uninvited Guests Part 13/? - So That’s What It Does Part 14/? - The What and the Where Part 15/? - Gearing Up Part 16/? - Just Passing Through Part 17/? - Dinner with Druids Part 18/? - Kracness Henge Part 19/? - A Task Interrupted Part 20/? - The Red Death Part 21/? - Aphelion Part 22/? - The Stone Giants Part 23/? - Nat the Giant Killer Part 24/? - An Interrogation Part 25/? - Guilt Part 26/? - Rushman’s Brilliant Idea Part 27/? - Hunter in Hiding Part 28/? - Ridiculous Part 29/? - The Guy from Barton Part 30/? - Sherwood Forest Part 31/? - Buckeye’s Fall Part 32/? - Robin Hood Part 33/? - Fantasies and Consequences Part 34/? - Swords of Damocles Part 35/? - The Road to London Part 36/? - View from the Top Part 37/? - Storming the Castle Part 38/? - Beneath the Chapel Floor

At last - the Grail!

           There were a lot of doors and windows in the White Tower – it would have been impractical to try to close off each and every one.  The chapel basement, however, only had two: the single entrance doorway and the one tiny window.  So while Natasha took her pictures, the others put up horseshoes and wreathed both apertures with ivy.  Nat’s phone buzzed as Allen kept them updated, and she pulled it out to look at his last few texts.

           “He says somebody’s called the cops,” she said. “We’d better get going.”

           Nat put her camera away, and chose the stone tile right at the focus of the apse – that would be directly beneath the altar above. Everybody else waited while she got out a crowbar and worked the end of it under a chipped corner.  She didn’t know why, and she suspected that none of the others did either, but it seemed important somehow that she was the one who did the first damage.  Maybe it was just because she was supposedly the archaeologist.  For a moment she still couldn’t bring herself to do it, but then she gritted her teeth, summoned up her courage, and pried.

           It didn’t move at first.  Even after a thousand years, the mortar holding the tiles in place was still pretty solid, and after a couple of tries Nat gave up on getting the piece out whole and just hit it with the curved end of the crowbar.  The tile broke, and she was able to pull the pieces up one by one, with the mortar still clinging to them.

           “Right,” she said.  “No going back now.”

           They got to work, taking up the tiles one by one and piling them on top of a tarpaulin so the mess could be easily cleaned up.  Under the stone tile was an older terracotta layer, and beneath that they started finding bluish basalt.

           There was a brief pause in the work when Allen texted again to warm them that the cops were searching for intruders, and appeared to have found one of Robin’s arrows.  Shovels and picks had to be set down while everybody crouched in silence out of view of the window, watching shadows pass across the slash of light it shed on the floor.  After thirty minutes during which Nat was sure somebody was going to come bursting into the room any moment, her phone buzzed again.  The cops were re-grouping outside the Waterloo Block.  Perhaps they’d decided the whole thing was a prank.  With the danger of discovery past, they got back to work again.

           “Question,” said Sam, stacking terracotta tiles – some of these were decorated with engraved designs, and Nat didn’t want any more broken. “What do we think this thing looks like?  I’m pretty sure we’re all picturing something like the sparkly cup from Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade, but the nuns told Sir Steve it wasn’t a cup, and the Red Death said it was a drop of the blood of Odin or something.”

           Nat looked at Sir Stephen, whom she figured would be the most likely to know, but he didn’t have an answer for them.  “I was given no description of it,” he said. “The prioress suggested that I would know it when I saw it, for it could be nothing but what it is.”

           “I’ve been thinking about that, too,” said Sharon, chipping at the edge of the layer of mortar as if at ice on the driveway.  “I’m pretty sure it’s a gem.  Probably not cut, because they didn’t back then, and it’ll have bits knocked off where they set them into the fragments.  According to Wikipedia the Grail is described sometimes as a stone, and a big ruby or something could be poetically described as a drop of crystallized blood, or Odin’s gouged-out eye.”

           “I was picturing a cup of red glitter, myself,” said Nat, “but yeah, that sounds about right.”  She honestly hadn’t stopped to wonder what the Grail looked like – like Sir Stephen, she’d assumed they’d know it when they found it.

           They were now closing in.  As they cleared away more and more of what lay on top of it, it began to look as if the deepest layer of floor was made of a single huge slab of dolerite.  Exactly what this was and what it was doing here did not become clear until they found the apse end of it, which was not nice and straight like a block of building stone ought to be, but sharply angled, like a shard of glass.  The image of a body impaled on such a stone flashed before Nat’s eyes, and she had a revelation.

           “It’s one of the missing stones from Kracness Henge!” she exclaimed.

           “I think you’re right,” said Sam thoughtfully. “It’s the right shape and size… why would they use that, though?”

           “Probably because they knew it was somehow sacred, even if they weren’t sure how,” said Nat.  “Peoples in Britain have been re-using each other’s archaeology for a very long time. William the Conqueror probably figured it was already protecting the Grail somehow, and he didn’t want to take any chances.”

           “I wonder how much it weighs,” said Sam.

           He had a point there – another reason for using this stone would simply be because it was very heavy and therefore very difficult for any would-be thief to move.  “Let’s find the rest of the edges,” she said.  “Then we can estimate.”

           The sky outside was getting worryingly pink as they worked their way down the slab, and at the end nearest the door they found something else – a piece of dense, dark sandstone with some text carved into it. Luckily the mortar had not adhered to this particularly well, and they were able to pry most of it away in one big chunk, leaving the inscription bare for Nat to read.  She brushed mortar grit out of the O’s and smiled as she realized the writing on it was in Norman French.  Obviously it was, she thought, because this was a part of the story that Natasha herself had made up, not somebody who thought people in the eleventh century had talked like Hamlet.

           “It says, William, son of Robert, caused this stone to be set in place in the year of our Lord 1079,” she read, running a finger across the words.  “Only by the blood of a living Saint can the chamber below be opened, because only a living Saint do I trust with what lies beneath.”

           “Don’t you have to be dead to be a saint?” asked Sharon.

           “Usually,” said Nat.  She stood up and brushed her hands off on her trousers.  “Sir Stephen?  Come here.”

           Sir Stephen looked surprised.  “I am no saint!” he protested.

           “Actually, you were informally considered one for a very long time,” said Nat.  “There was a guy just last year who thought he’d found a chapel dedicated to you on the Isle of Man, but I wrote a paper in which I argued that the star in the altar painting actually represented Saint Dominic, because your star always appeared on a shield.”  She gestured to the stone.  “Just humour me… let’s see if we can get our miracle.”

           With a dubious expression on his face, Sir Stephen pulled out one of the knives he carried and, without so much as a flinch, cut his arm with the blade.  Blood smeared on the bright metal.  Nat expected him to hold out his arm and let the blood drip on the stone, the way characters did in movies, but instead Sir Stephen got down on one knee and thrust the knife into the basalt.

           It should have stopped with the tip blunted, because the slab was stone and the knife mere steel.  Instead, it went in right to the hilt.  The phrase like a knife through butter, over-used as it was, was the only thing that came to mind.

           The slab didn’t behave like butter, though.  Instead of letting Sir Stephen cut it, it began to glow around where the knife had entered, and then to curl and blacken, like burning paper.  Sir Stephen dropped his knife into the growing hole and scurried backwards.  The others followed his lead, crowding back into the apse as the entire stone slowly burned away.  A number of the tiles around it also crumbled and fell in until nearly the entire floor was gone, and the chapel basement filled with the dull red glow of what had been revealed beneath it.

           It was safe to say that this was not what anybody had expected.

           It was not Sam’s jewelled chalice, nor Nat’s cup of red glitter, nor even Sharon’s uncut ruby.  Worse, it wasn’t something they were going to be able to carry out in a sports bag, or put in an old Soviet rocket to shoot into space.  It was huge.

           The cavity they’d revealed was about twelve feet long and eight feet deep, and as wide as the entire room.  Filling almost this entire space were two giant slabs of what looked like haematite, with its metallic sheen and slightly bubbly surface texture. These were arranged one on top of each other like a layer cake, and the upper surface was carved with snaking lines of symbols that resembled Futhark runes or Anglo-Saxon, but far more complicated, as if they were also a form of hieroglyphics.  Natasha couldn’t read it, and suspected there was nobody alive on earth who could.

           Rather than sitting directly atop the other as gravity might be expected to dictate, the upper slab was floating about three inches above its partner, and in between them was… Nat didn’t know what it was, and could barely find words to describe it.  A glistening fluid that somehow glowed red, like coals in a furnace or bricks in a kiln, despite its inky black surface.  It would seep a little ways out of the gap and then recoil back into it, as if it were trying to escape confinement but could not do so.  She could definitely understand how this had been interpreted as sang real – the blood of a god.

           And now they had a problem, because they weren’t going to be able to move this thing, let alone use or dispose of it.  William the Conqueror probably had the right idea all along by simply hiding it but now they’d exposed it for all the world to see, and had neither the time nor the means to cover it up again.

           Eye contact was made and broken between several members of the group as everybody looked to see if anybody else had any ideas. Nobody did.  With most of the floor gone and what was left probably not very stable, they couldn’t even leave the room themselves, much less take this enormous thing with them.

           “You didn’t know what you were going to do when you found it,” Natasha said to Sir Stephen.

           He shook his head, but did not take his eyes off the Grail, which he was staring at in mesmerized terror.  “I hadn’t any idea it would be so big,” he said. Apparently Sir Stephen, too, had been picturing something he could put in his pocket.

           Natasha’s phone vibrated again.  She took it out to look at Allen’s text message: it’s almost dawn, kids.  Are you finished yet?  How could she reply?

           Then they heard the shout from outside, audible through the basement’s little window.  “In there!  Under the chapel!”

           Nat stiffened.  They’d been discovered – they had to get out of here, but they couldn’t. They couldn’t leave the Grail uncovered, but even if they could, they were trapped on the little half-moon of remaining floor in the apse.  The hole in the floor spanned from wall to wall, and the vaulted ceiling had no rafters that they could cling to or climb across.  Maybe Sir Stephen could leap the gap if he had a running start, but there was no room left to run.  The only obvious way across would be to jump onto the upper haematite block and walk across that, but nobody wanted to try.  The Grail didn’t look like something it would be safe to touch.

           Sir Stephen lifted his shield and pulled out his other knife.  Sharon drew her revolver.  Nat had the gun she’d taken from the security guard, and Sam gripped a crowbar in both hands, prepared to use it as a club if he had to.  Robin Hood fitted an arrow to his bow and stood ready.

           Footsteps echoed in the empty stone building, making it difficult to tell how many people were coming – especially when they were all but drowned out by the thumping of Natasha’s heart in her ears.  It turned out to be three security guards and an elderly Yeoman who must have arrived early to work that morning, already dressed in his ridiculous uniform.  He hung back in the doorway while the guards rushed in, and then stopped dead when they saw what was in front of them.

           For the first few seconds it was clear that none of the three even knew where to look.  Five armed people, a giant hole in the floor, and this bizarre and inexplicable object in the hole, bubbling ominously away.  The guards – a middle-aged white man with a shaved head, a younger man with shaggy brown hair and freckles, and a muscular black woman with her hair in a tight bun – were so surprised and confused that they didn’t even draw their guns.

           Finally, the older man’s brain seemed to catch up with the situation.  He belatedly pulled out his weapon and asked the reasonable question.

           “What the hell is this?” he demanded.  He didn’t sound angry or intimidating, and probably wasn’t even trying to.  He was frightened and confused, and desperately hoping one of these people in the apse would have some kind of explanation.

           “The Holy Grail,” Natasha replied calmly, because she figured this man was equally likely to believe just about anything she might tell him – she might as well tell him the truth.

           The three guards glanced nervously down into the hole again, while the Yeoman loitered just outside the doorway, checking his watch as if wondering if this would interfere with his work schedule for the day.  Nat wondered if they thought the Grail were likely to reach up and grab them.

           “And who are you?” the bald guard asked.

           Nat looked over her shoulder at her companions, then turned back to the guards.  She could only think of one answer that would be both reasonably true and acceptably short. “We’re archaeologists.”

[thegloriouscollectorlady]

Season 8 Speculation and why Beth just might be Sophia 2.0

So I was chatting with some friends in a Facebook group I am part of and talking about the new EW photos that were released  and I happened to stumble upon a very old interview by RK and I had a thought that turned into multiple connections and an idea about where certain character arcs are headed. In particular Daryl and C@rol’s arcs with obvious connections and influences to and by Beth. That little thought turned into a pretty big meta so I am including it under a read more but I am very excited about this because there are some themes that are so strong through this entire story line and Gimple is a master at creating these types of arcs so I think these are anything but a coincidence and I think the endgame here is starting to take shape much like we saw in the beautiful arcs created for other characters like Sasha and Abraham.

               So in order to truly pull this altogether I started way back at the beginning of the story and for C@rol and Daryl that would be when Sophia went missing. The reason I really got thinking about what this meta turned into is because I found an old article where RK is quoted a couple of times. The article was from 2014 and clearly took place right after Alone and before the Grove aired so before the end of S4. In the article Kirkman says two really interesting things. First he is asked questions about Beth and Daryl and the nature of their relationship. He hems and haws about it and gives reasons for what they might be without answering directly but he then goes on to say that he doubts this will all end well for Daryl (Beth has just gone missing in Alone) because Daryl is unlucky in love. Now that was very interesting to me because Kirkman categorically tries to deny that Beth and Daryl are romantic (by the way he never uses age as reason more just things about people having shared experiences and such) but then goes on to say that Daryl will probably remain unlucky in love. So there were two interesting implications here. The first being that while Daryl and Beth were not romantically involved with each other Daryl at least was feeling something deep and that something was probably love or at least those involved with the show knew his feelings were going to turn into love whether that love was ever reciprocated or not. The second piece to this that is very interesting is that the entire article is very dark and Kirkman makes no bones about indicating that this whole thing probably isn’t going to end well (by the way he confirms here that Beth was indeed in the trunk of the car when taken by the Grady cops) but anyway that is highly unusually for the show. Looking back he all but warns the audience where the story line is headed in an almost outright fashion and I am not sure we’ve ever seen something like that from RK or the show before. I find that super curious. The final thing about this article that caught my attention was this is clearly the first place we see mentions of Sophia around Beth. During this article age is never mentioned and relationships are never given for the comparison instead the comparison clearly arises from one particular issue. Beth was kidnapped and had gone missing much like Sophia had gone missing and the implication was that Daryl would go looking for Beth much like he had Sophia.  So this is clearly the birthplace of the Beth equals Sophia idea that Kirkman later uses over and over again ( and mind you remember who sat on the couch with Emily on TTD after Coda . . . none other than Kirkman himself). The overall reason I found this so interesting was because I have seen a lot of debate about Beth’s Grady arc and how it ended and whether those changes were last minute. The reason that is relevant is because if they were it would explain why Emily was told at the last minute (or so we’ve been led to believe) and also it would indicate that maybe there were problems between Emily and people on set. It is VERY clear from this article and the things RK says and the tone that none of the Grady arc or the outcome of the Grady arc was last minute. I daresay that SG and by extension RK knew exactly where Grady was going when S4 was penned by the writers. This article and the things said within it make that very clear.

               So in the past I had seen the article where Kirkman compares Beth to Sophia after Grady and honestly the article was ridiculous because Kirkman says that Daryl loved Beth the same way he loved Sophia. The comparison is ludicrous when examined on the surface just based on the simple facts that the show illustrates for us and I’ve talked about that in the past. This statement always came across as reachy on Kirkman’s part to me and for that reason it always stuck out. Why use Sophia of all characters when there were others who probably would have been a better comparison. Then I stumbled upon this article doing research for something else and it occurred to me that statement by Kirkman post Coda was important. He picked Sophia for a reason because in a way Beth is actually Sophia 2.0 it’s just way more complicated than the surface might indicate. RK is famous for his cryptic speak, misdirection, and confusing statements and he loves to play with his audience. He will even lie on occasion as we’ve seen him admit to in his writers hack notes. But RK always has an angle that he is working when he does this. He is trying to lead the audience to a conclusion either a right one or a wrong one depending on what he is trying to do. So I think it’s highly unlikely that he magically chose Sophia for this comparison and that it was simply a face value thing. Upon examining the overall story line and breaking it down certain key pieces start to come together that are really interesting. Before I start the breakdown of the narrative I want to detour a bit to the EW article and the one particular photo of the banquet that has everyone talking. That photo is part of what got me thinking in this direction and I just want to point out a few things about it. First we have Daryl sitting in a throne dressed all in black. This implies two things. One that he is seated in a power position and two that he is in mourning. He is also apparently pouring out his wine to mourn the dead and holding C@rol’s look at the flowers bouquet. Also Norman’s eyes appear to be almost completely closed while he is being spoon fed by C@rol. The implications here alone are interesting because to be spoon fed by someone is to have them hand you information or things with very little thinking or involvement on your part. Then Norman also has his eyes closed while being fed which indicates trust or blind acceptance. But aside from this C@rol is feeding Daryl with a spoon (apparently of chocolate pudding but I am not really sure that matters or doesn’t matter as we can’t actually see that) and C@rol is also holding Sophia’s doll. She is also wearing a dark blue dress and blue is a color often associated with calm and intelligence. So the props around C@rol and Daryl are mainly synonymous with two particular characters and who would those characters be but Sophia and Beth. So the dolls is clearly Sophia’s and the look at the flowers debacle goes back to C@rol trying to mother Lizzie and Mika in a way different than Sophia ( I will talk about this later) but essentially for Carol these props go back to Sophia. For Daryl he is dressed in black (he has been on the show as well since Beth’s death in S5 and also the other interesting connection for Daryl to black is the yin yang stuff and both him and Beth wearing the mismatched black and white shoes laces which Norman himself even wore to a con once). Then he is pouring out wine for the dead who can’t be there. Alcohol in general is synonymous with Beth and Daryl’s relationship think Still but also Beth broke a wine bottle over the walkers head in Still when Daryl allows her to protect herself (he trusts that she can actually protect herself) so wine in general can be linked to Beth and Daryl’s relationship. Then we have C@rol spoon feeding Daryl and which character linked to Daryl had a spoon? Well that would be Beth when she picked up the very interesting Washington D.C. spoon in Still. So all the props related to C@rol and Daryl go back to two particular characters that have been linked by show creators themselves. After all Beth is actually Sophia 2.0 right? So what might all this mean?

               I think to understand where this arc is actually going we have to go all the way back to the beginning of C@rol and Daryl’s relationship which would have been when Sophia first went missing.  This is truly sort of the beginning of both of these characters arcs. Daryl’s really began when Merle went missing but we begin to understand  what that means to Daryl’s arc through his search for Sophia when he hallucinates Merle. So when this arc begins for each of these characters we have Daryl trying to figure himself out and C@rol doing the same. Daryl achieves two things through his search for Sophia. The first is that he comes to terms with separating himself from Merle. He begins to finally see himself as his own man (the whole point of the hallucination scenes) and we later see this come to fruition when Merle reappears and Daryl refuses to leave TF. The Sophia arc is also important because it shows us something about Daryl. Daryl gravitates first towards C@rol and Sophia because of shared experiences. He understands what it’s like to live in an abusive household. Daryl was Sophia at one point. He even expresses this to Andrea when he talks about being lost in the woods and no one caring enough to come looking for him. He doesn’t want that for Sophia in whom he sees himself so he goes looking for her so that at least someone is trying. I think it’s important to realize that Daryl himself is a little lost at this point and his relentless search for Sophia is as much about finding his own place in this new world as it is about finding her. It’s through his selfless search for Sophia that others in the group begin to see Daryl’s heart and this is his introduction as the protector of the group a role he never relinquishes. That is the importance of the angel wings on his vest that are introduced at this point in the story. Daryl becomes the group’s guardian angel. We can suppose that during this time Daryl also sees in C@rol a lot of his mother. At this point in the story C@rol is weak, weepy, and frozen. She doesn’t even attempt to look for her own child something we know she would do now. Much like Daryl’s own mother froze and gave up and forsook protecting her children C@rol has done this to Sophia and Daryl recognizes that as something he is familiar with.  It’s why he cares so much what happens to Sophia. I believe it’s also why he gives C@rol the Cherokee rose. He is trying to give her strength and encourage her in a way no one did for his own mother. Daryl sees C@rol as a mother figure on one hand because the entire group does ( Tobin even says as much) but also because Daryl sees in her his own mother and he gravitates towards that especially because we learn later how traumatic Daryl’s past really was and how guilty he feels over his mother’s death. Two key symbols we’ve seen a lot of around both Beth and Daryl are fire and alcohol and I don’t think this is a coincidence given that Daryl’s mother died because she got so drunk that she set her own bed on fire. But I digress from the point of the Cherokee rose which I believe is this. The Cherokee rose was intended to help the Cherokee mothers by giving them strength to keep going. The mothers were important to the tribe because it is the mothers who were tasked with ensuring the future of the young a role we’ve certainly seen C@rol in. The rose was intended to help the woman forget their sadness over what was happening to them (their forced exile sort of like how the world was never going to be the same and folks were just figuring that out in S2 of TWD) and it was also intended to give them strength as the plant was sturdy and strong with pickers to protect it defying anything that attempted to destroy it. The woman felt beautiful because of the plant and therefore derived the strength and courage to go on and to protect the young and help the nation to flourish.  Much like Daryl received his wings in S2 a symbol of his future role C@rol received her symbol as well the Cherokee rose and all the symbolism that accompanies it. C@rol is the mother, the strong protector of children, and she is destined to help raise the children to survive in this future world.  That’s why Daryl puts a Cherokee Rose on C@rol’s grave after she is presumed dead at the prison. The homage there is to C@rol herself not to Sophia. The rose is a symbol of C@rol and her role as a strong mother and protector. Since C@rol was actually supposed to die at that point in the story I think the rose also pointed towards her future role in the story and what the writers envisioned for her and why they decided to keep her on the show.

               That being said this is just the beginning of C@rol and Daryl’s arcs. The point where we begin to understand where they are actually headed but as we all know on TWD the path to get where you’re going can be fraught with obstacles and setbacks and we’ve seen that happen over and over for both of these characters. Take C@rol’s arc in S5 and S6 and examine all the setbacks there. If her role was to protect children what happened with Sam was C@rol’s lowest point. Even by the end of S7 she had not yet reached the conclusion of her arc. But I think what the EW article and other hints in the narrative itself are showing is that the conclusion is actually coming. To show that I am going to point out major things in both C@rol and Daryl’s arcs from S4 onward because that is when SG took over. I think it is important to consider previous seasons because I think that is where Gimple got the idea for where this was all going but I think it really starts to take shape in S4. Daryl’s arc starts with him trying to truly find himself and his role within the group and C@rol’s starts with her finding her inner strength and her purpose which is to be the protector of children and to ensure the future of group through those children.

               Now to understand where I am headed with some of this it’s also important to understand C@rol and Beth’s relationship. Because otherwise none of this is going to make sense. C@rol mothered Beth much the same way she does Daryl. Beth didn’t come to story time and learn about knives it was more an adult mother daughter relationship. C@rol was there for Beth when she needed to talk and she helped Beth and gave advice when it came to Judith. This is much the same way a mother might engage with a grown daughter. We see this play out on screen at the prison and it sets up a dynamic where we can see that C@rol cares for Beth greatly and that in return Beth cares for and admires C@rol. There is that interesting scene between Beth and C@rol at the prison where they talk about Daryl and C@rol attempts to help Beth understand why Daryl did what he did. I think that scene is very significant because already there was a dynamic forming between Beth, Daryl, and Judith and their roles with the baby and C@rol is a part of that. But suffice to say the important thing to take away from this is that C@rol cared about Beth deeply and Beth felt the same way in return.

               When S4 begins we see Daryl’s role as group leader and protector beginning to take shape. I think this hints towards his ultimate role in the story but it’s important to recognize that Daryl learns a hard lesson at this point in the story. He learns what it means to be a leader and at the same time what it means to lose people when you are a leader and that blow is softened for him by Beth. This is the beginning of the emotional connection we see between Beth and Daryl.  Beth’s impact on Daryl is all about his leadership of the team that goes to Big Lots but it’s also about Beth’s individual response. Daryl insists on being the one to tell Beth about Zach because that’s what a leader does. They take responsibility but Daryl also sees and recognizes that Beth is extending compassion to him because of his own pain over the situation and that is something that affects Daryl. He sees it and notes it because he later brings it up when he’s angry at her so it’s important to recognize that Daryl notices that Beth’s response to him when he tells her about Zach is not what he was expecting. The reason her response makes such a marked impact on Daryl is because even in her own pain Beth reaches out to him. That is an atypical response from a person who is suffering and it confuses Daryl but it’s also a hallmark of great strength and leadership potential and I think Daryl recognizes that. That’s why later when he is angry and hurting he throws it back at Beth. He’s trying to hurt her and he goes for vulnerabilities and ways to rattle her beliefs about herself.

               But I digress from the point of where this is all going which is to outline the contiguous arcs between Daryl, Beth, and C@rol. So when S4 begins C@rol has very clearly taken on the role of mother to a group of children at the prison. During story time she is actually teaching the children how to defend themselves. C@rol is trying to fulfill the role she is destined for but she has swung too hard in the opposite direction. Whereas the old C@rol was too soft this new C@rol is all hard edges. Her progression to a warrior on the show is pretty gradual and you might miss it if you weren’t paying attention but her emotional change is a pretty marked delineation between before and after. S4 C@rol is all about surviving but she seems to have lost something important and that is what makes surviving worthwhile. When C@rol murders Karen and David she crosses a line and Rick is right to be concerned about that. When survival becomes more important than ones humanity and being compassionate than you are treading a very dangerous line.  The writers choose a very specific situation to illustrate this. There is no black and white here. No maybe C@rol did the right thing. She made the choice to kills sick, helpless, innocent people who had no ability to defend themselves and then she tried to cover it up illustrating that at least on some level she knew she was wrong. The other interesting thing about C@rol’s shift here is the style in which she is trying to teach the children. It is also very hard and emotionless. She has lost all feeling with them. One could argue that her hardness is what actually blinds C@rol to what is going on with Lizzie. If she had been a little more open to the girls talking with her about their feelings then C@rol may have understood more quickly what was really going on with Lizzie. But instead she persists in trying to make them tough and in minimizing how they feel. The other interesting thing symbolically is that when Rick banishes C@rol she ends up at a law office. That has some pretty interesting symbolism if you consider she was banished for essentially murdering two people and she then chooses to shelter in a law office. I think this indicates that eventually C@rol will have to atone for what she’s done. I also think it’s very interesting that within the law office they capture several scenes of C@rol with the scales of justice. I think all of the symbolism together is about atonement but I also think the scales of justice could represent C@rol finding a balance within herself as both a warrior and protector and also a compassionate caregiver to children.

               The prison falls because of the Governor and Daryl escapes with Beth and C@rol who is banished sees the smoke and worried that something is wrong heads back to the prison where she finds Tye with Lizzie, Mika, and Judith. I think the Bethyl fandom has talked exhaustively about why Daryl was paired with Beth when the prison fell. I am not going to go into a lot detail here besides to mention that Beth serves a pretty important purpose to Daryl besides being someone he becomes emotionally attached to. Beth becomes Daryl’s litmus test for all things good in the world. He sees in her love, compassion, forgiveness, acceptance, but also justice, optimism, and strength because he recognizes that Beth is strong in a very complicated and nontraditional way but it’s a strength that he admires and I think by Alone wishes to emulate. I think the most important thing to note about Beth and Daryl’s relationship is that she makes him want to be a better person. She makes him believe that he is worthy of that and he’s actively seeking to become the person she believes him to be when they are separated. Examples of this are how he behaves with the Claimers, his willingness to sacrifice himself for Rick and the rest of his family on the road to Terminus, him verbally telling C@rol he thinks you can change, and him picking up the book about child abuse survivors during Consumed.  They say that nothing makes you a better person faster than falling in love with someone. That’s because when you love and admire someone and care deeply for them you want to be the best version of yourself for them.  It’s also true that when you feel loved and accepted you feel brave enough to conquer things that might have seemed insurmountable before because you feel like you have their support and backing.  When you look up articles about this topic you find things like being in love means a person introduces you to things you never before imagined, they motivate you to do better, they are profoundly interesting, they make you feel fulfilled, they make you dream bigger, they help you achieve your goals because they understand how important they are to you, they challenge you, and they make you realize how worthy you really are.  These are the things Beth and Daryl brought out in each other even if they didn’t consciously recognize it. Subtly through actions and examples these concepts are brought to light through Beth and Daryl’s relationship with each other. It’s also important to recognize that C@rol is paired with Tye, Lizzie, Mika, and Judith after the fall of the prison for particular reasons. The first reason was to wrap up C@rol and Tye’s arc. Tye’s overall arc began to take shape with Karen’s death. Everything that follows after is about wrapping up his arc and it all leads to his death in 5X9. Part of that was ensuring that Tye and C@rol had closure about Karen’s death. Them being together allowed for C@rol to confess her crimes and for Tye to offer his forgiveness. She did not accept this forgiveness because she did not feel worthy of it but at this point in the story it was about Tye offering his forgiveness so that he could let go of his pain. I think it’s also important to recognize that it is during this arc with Lizzie and Mika that C@rol begins to process what she has done. When Rick originally banished her C@rol did not feel culpable for her actions. She was angry at what Rick was doing and while I think subconsciously she felt guilt consciously she felt he was wrong. She didn’t even hesitate to rush back to the prison. I think it is after losing Lizzie and Mika and being forgiven by Tye that C@rol begins to understand the magnitude of what she’s done and to feel the weight of it. C@rol is paired with Lizzie and Mika to unfortunately illustrate how C@rol’s hardness leads to the loss of two more young lives. Sophia was lost to C@rol when she was emotionally too soft. Lizzie and Mika were lost to her when she was emotionally too hard and blinded to what was going on in front of her.

               So Daryl is separated from Beth and C@rol losses Lizzie and Mika and the group is brought back together at Terminus. C@rol rescues the group and returns Judith to Rick and it’s clear that even though Rick has now forgiven her that C@rol, finally feeling the weight of what she’s actually done, can’t forgive herself. She attempts to leave the group because of those feelings leading her to be in the same place as Daryl when the car with the cross goes by them. Now it’s important to recognize that C@rol attempting to run away from her feelings and guilt is what leads Daryl to track her down and even see the car with the cross on it. Daryl has been actively concerned about Beth and talking about her since she disappeared in Alone but his first real clue about how to locate her since blindly running after her comes through C@rol. But it comes as C@rol is trying to escape her family.

               When Daryl goes after the car with the cross this is where the Sophia parallels kick in. It has nothing to do with why Daryl is motivated to go after Beth. Daryl’s motivation is clear here the parallels are more about C@rol’s involvement and the circumstances themselves. It’s also rather interesting when you consider that a Greene was chosen for this scenario when it was Herschel who was responsible for this scenario the first time around.  It sort of brings everything a bit full circle in an odd way. Before I talk about the parallels and anti-parallels of Beth and Sophia I just want to briefly talk about why it’s important that C@rol is on this rescue mission to try to save Beth. The reason that’s important is because when Sophia went missing C@rol did nothing to try to save her. It was Daryl who went out searching for Sophia relentlessly and who never gave up hope. Now in this second scenario things have flipped a little bit. The missing girl is important to not just C@rol but to Daryl as well and C@rol goes with Daryl to try to save her.

               Now quickly before I continue this I want to examine what we know about the similarities and differences in Beth and Sophia’s disappearances.  I think the first thing we need to recognize is that the dead were responsible for Sophia’s disappearance where the living were responsible for Beth’s. Sophia ran away out of fear and Beth was taken against her will. Sophia was most likely bitten right after running away and was dead pretty much right after having disappeared whereas Beth was alive and fighting while separated from TF. It’s Glenn that eventually leads TF to discover what happened to Sophia whereas Glenn and Maggie are off on an obscure mission when it’s discovered what happened to Beth. Violence is used to discover Sophia’s whereabouts (Shane going all psycho) whereas Tye suggest a peaceful exchange to get Beth back. When Sophia comes out of the barn she is already dead whereas when TF sees Beth she is very much alive. Rick shoots Sophia in the head and Rick’s crazy stunt with Officer Bob is why the prisoner exchange is short in the Grady hallway. Interestingly enough Rick shoots Officer Bob in the head. Rick’s actions, shooting Officer Bob in the head, in a way lead to Beth being shot in the head. When Sophia is revealed Daryl comforts C@rol when Beth is shot C@rol steps forward and puts her hand on Daryl’s shoulder as he begins to breakdown. But here are some other interesting ideas to consider. Sophia was a walker and she was put down by being shot in the head and a funeral was held and she was buried.  Beth was alive and was shot in the head and we were never shown a funeral and here’s the real kicker. . . in 5X10 Maggie and Glenn find a Beth look alike walker in the trunk of a car and Maggie freaks out. That is something to consider. Why was Maggie so thrown by seeing this? Beth was never a walker and if she truly died when she was shot in the head she never could have become a walker. So what prompted Maggie to behave in this manner when her sister should have been confirmed dead and buried at this point in the story? She should be comforted to know that Beth will never have that fate. But instead she absolutely freaks out upon seeing the walker in the trunk.

               I think it’s also important to recognize that when Sophia went missing C@rol was unable to look for her because she was frozen by her fear. During the situation with Beth C@rol is unable to help because she is incapacitated physically from being hit by a car. But it’s no coincidence that C@rol is included in this story with Daryl. C@rol was unable to save her own daughter but Beth is like a surrogate daughter to her and she tries to save her as well. Instead she is grievously wounded, it is Beth that saves her, and she is forced to watch as someone she loves and cares for is gunned down in front of her. Not only does this hurt C@rol deeply but she has to watch Daryl someone else she also cares for deeply as he suffers tremendously over this loss.

               We are led to understand how deeply this loss has hurt C@rol when she gives Daryl Beth’s knife. She tells him that she thinks Beth saved her and she talks about how she thinks Beth saved him too. The unspoken meaning here however is that C@rol is referencing emotional salvation with Daryl. I think it became clear and that she began to understand how Beth emotionally saved Daryl during Consumed and that’s what she is referencing during that scene where she clearly seems to understand that Beth saved her life while at Grady. She is saying that Beth physically saved her and the she saved Daryl emotionally which is why he had changed so much. After losing Sophia and not being able to save her this second loss must weigh heavily on C@rol. She understands what Beth meant to Daryl and she was unable to save her after what Beth had done for her. I think this is where C@rol begins to question her own worthiness and its where her guilt begins to eat her alive. It’s why C@rol tells Daryl that she can’t let herself feel it as she walks away from him. Because she knows that if she does it will tear her apart and she’s desperately trying to tamp down those feelings. By giving Daryl Beth’s knife she is trying to atone in whatever way possibly for what happened to her. It doesn’t bring Beth back but it gives Daryl something to hold onto and C@rol recognizes that he needs that. This gesture also plays into the you need to feel it and I can’t line that C@rol utters. She understands that Daryl needs a talisman. That he needs to feel his pain and loss over Beth and he needs to hang onto her memory to stay strong or he will fall apart whereas her way of coping is to bury her feelings and push them all away. I think watching Daryl fall apart is also deeply painful to C@rol because she cares about him so much and while she never utters it on the show I think her actions show that she wishes she were the one to die at Grady. The Same Boat brings a lot of these feelings to the surface for C@rol. She is trapped in yet another impossible situation with a Greene girl and she is desperate for a different outcome. It is clear that C@rol would have done just about anything in that episode to save Maggie and Maggie’s baby including sacrificing her own life if it came down to that.

               When C@rol and Daryl arrive at the ASZ their arcs continue to develop. C@rol does some rather interesting things as she begins to play a rather elaborate rouse on the people who live in Alexandria and she pulls it off. She manipulates the people who live there and even some of her own people in order to make certain things happen. However the one interesting thing is that while this is going on even while wearing this rather emotionless façade C@rol feels for Sam. She sees in him and Jesse herself and Sophia and even though there are cracks in her façade and she is clearly feeling things for them and trying to help them she also keeps them at arm’s length. She is so afraid of getting attached to another child the she tries to scare Sam away from her and in doing so she tells him a story that leads to his death. It’s rather tragic on a grand scale if you consider what really happened between Sam and C@rol and the way that poor child died. It’s also clear that the circumstances aren’t lost on C@rol. Not only did Sam die but Jesse did as well and C@rol begins to understand what might have happened to her after Sophia’s death if she couldn’t let go of her child. The thing is that at this point in the story C@rol hasn’t let Sophia go and I think she recognizes that. Jesse’s inability to physically let go of Sam led to her death whereas I think C@rol is beginning to understand that her emotional inability to let go of Sophia (her original and deepest loss) is contributing to her own very slow decline and eventual death. Lizzie and Mika were part of this decline and so was Beth because not only did she fail to save Beth but she failed to save Beth after Beth saved her. It is an unpaid debt that C@rol doesn’t feel worthy of.

               As C@rol spirals out of control Daryl is having his own long slow slide into despair. He starts out trying very valiantly to hang onto Beth and the things she taught him but we see pieces of him chipped away one at a time. Daryl’s relationship with Denise was very much about Beth. What drew Daryl to Denise in the first place was that he saw bits and pieces of Beth in her. Symbolically this is important to the story because of Dwight and this is why. Daryl began to care for Beth deeply during their time alone together. It was those feelings that blinded him to the danger outside the funeral home. The dog was a ploy used to show us cautious Daryl who carefully checks the situation and the door and emotionally blinded Daryl who is so distracted by what he is feeling for Beth and how to explain that to her that he blindly opens the door and lets in a horde of walkers. That behavior directly leads to Beth being taken and in Daryl’s mind there is no way he doesn’t blame himself for that and her subsequent death as a result of it. If he hadn’t been feeling what he was feeling for her than he wouldn’t have dropped his guard. Fast forward to Always Accountable in S6 and recognize that this is the tantamount fulfillment of Daryl trying to carryout Beth’s legacy. The episode is rife with reminders and callbacks to Beth because it’s intended to illustrate that this is where Daryl tries to honor his love for Beth. It’s also rather interesting that in the episode that introduces Dwight and Sherry we are shown an Easter egg involving the Cherokee Rose.  A lot has been made of this but I’ve come to believe it simply symbolizes how inextricably C@rol’s arc is linked to Beth and Daryl’s. This episode is a major callback to Beth and it’s laying all the ground work for what is to come between Daryl and Dwight and I think the rose is intended to symbolize that C@rol’s arc will eventually resolve within this storyline as well. It’s an Easter egg portending that. So in attempting to honor Beth Daryl is taken advantage of. His offer of help is rebuffed and he is robbed of key elements of his persona including his bike and his bow.  This is all symbolic of Daryl losing pieces of himself as he tries to navigate the world around him. It’s symbolic of the writers breaking Daryl’s character down before trying to rebuild him as something other than what he was. We are to understand the role Beth plays in this through things like what happens in Always Accountable, through Daryl refusing to want to listen to music while in the vehicle with Rick (it reminds him of Beth singing), and through Denise’s death. The most tragic part of Denise’s death is that much like Beth’s Daryl feels responsible for it because he tried to let himself feel things. His feelings for Beth cause him to misjudge who Dwight and Sherry are and to lose his bow. Dwight even uses Daryl’s bow to kill Denise and tells him he actually meant to kill him. Whether he did or not Daryl most likely believes it to be the case. He believes he should have died instead of Denise and I hazard to guess that if he could go back and trade his life for Beth’s he would. But the tragedy here is that Daryl probably links good feelings to bad things happening to him.

               The rock bottom of both C@rol and Daryl’s arcs come at about the same time. For C@rol her slow spiral into despair culminates in her finally leaving TF behind as she’s been trying to do since S5 began. The emotions she is no longer able to suppress torment her until she tries to run away from them. It’s rather interesting that it’s Morgan who goes after her because at this point in time his life philosophy of not killing and all life is precious is the exact opposite of how C@rol has been living. They are completely opposite ends of the spectrum and I think that’s the point. Then they both land at the Kingdom with King Ezekiel and I think that is loaded with meaning as well. King Ezekiel is C@rol’s kindred spirit. His don’t bullshit a bull shitter line is hilarious because he sees right through her and the facades she’s used to successfully fool so many people. They are similar enough to understand each other but different enough to challenge each other. It’s an interesting and compelling dynamic. C@rol reaches rock bottom and finds King Ezekiel and at the same time Daryl reaches rock bottom and finds Beth. When it would be so easy to give up and give in Daryl eventually holds onto himself because of Beth and because of the things she taught him about love and self and family.

               This is where I think Daryl and C@rol’s arcs begin to diverge a bit more obviously. C@rol sequesters herself at the cabin because she is trying to reconcile her actions and the things she has done with who she is now. She’s trying to learn how to live with herself but also to figure out who that person actually is. King Ezekiel is trying to give her that time and I think the rather interesting thing to me is that even though she leaves the cabin C@rol still hasn’t resolved those problems yet. C@rol leaves the cabin because she knows Daryl was lying to her and because it isn’t in her nature to sit by and watch her family suffer when she might be able to help. She is the protector and the mother after all. She might not understand herself completely but she is very much in touch with that part of her personality. So that arc for C@rol is still very much unresolved. She still needs to figure out how to come to terms with her feelings and to reconcile those feelings with who she is. The ultimate pinnacle of this arc will happen when C@rol accepts her role as the mother she was always intended to be and that mother is protective and supportive. She will guide the young of the communities and teach them how to survive in this new world without losing their humanity or sight of why that survival is important. All of C@rol’s life experiences will give her the tools she needs to teach this to the future of society. Just as King Ezekiel is show to have a heart for children this has always been C@rol’s destiny as well and it will bring her full circle to the loss of her own daughter Sophia.  

               So while I think C@rol is very clearly on the upswing of her arc I think Daryl’s is a little more curious because I think he has a few more really hard lessons to learn. S7 went through a lot of elaborate story to parallel Dwight and Daryl and by extension Sherry and Beth. I think why I am most intrigued by what we know so far of S8 is because of how Beth died. Beth “died” at Grady because she couldn’t walk away from what Dawn had done. She couldn’t trust others to handle it. Her need for revenge was so strong that she allowed herself to do something really irrational. She allowed her emotions to take over. That always seemed very out of character for Beth but seeing where the story is going with Daryl it is possible that it was always very intentional. Daryl grabbed ahold of Beth when he needed her most in The Cell but he hasn’t been able to pull himself back from the brink. It appears in S8 that he is going to be hell bent on revenge and so emotionally out of control that he is going to go rouge. Sort of like a certain someone else we know did at Grady. He’s also surrounded himself with others who are as emotionally volatile as he is. Tara and Rosita are both mourning Denise and now Sasha as well. Rosita is also mourning Abe and on top of that Eugene’s perceived betrayal. Dwight is after Negan because of what he did to himself and to Sherry. These are not people that are thinking rationally. These are people that want to hurt others as badly as they are hurting. Daryl has always been emotionally volatile and these are people who will only serve to stoke those emotions not to temper them.

               So the big question here is what happens in S8. We know that S8 will encompass the final fall of Negan and his imprisonment and we can assume given Daryl’s complicated relationship with Dwight that his arc will also resolve this season. So where do Daryl and C@rol go from here. Well let’s start with C@rol.  Her destiny is to become the Cherokee rose. So what major obstacles does she need to overcome to get there? I think we can pinpoint that C@rol’s biggest albatross at this point is her own belief in her worthiness to live. We’ve seen her go so low that she was actually begging to die because she didn’t feel she deserved to live anymore after what she’d done. So the question then is what brings a character full circle from feeling like that.  I think King Ezekiel and Henry ( Ben’s little brother) are C@rol’s happy ever after of sorts or as happily ever after as you can get in the apocalypse but would they be enough to bring C@rol full circle. I don’t think they are just as I don’t think C@rol has gotten over the feelings she was wrestling with at the cabin. It was simply a matter of a greater issue becoming known to her that she couldn’t ignore. So how does C@rol go from believing she isn’t worthy of living to becoming a strong mother figure who shapes youngsters and future apocalyptic society. C@rol is on a redemption arc meaning that she has suffered greatly and overcome many obstacles to make up for the place she allowed herself to go in early season 4. In order for C@rol to experience a true redemption arc she must balance the scales for her original misdeed. That original misdeed of course is the deaths of Karen and David. Now the obvious way for the writers to do this would be to have C@rol sacrifice herself for another character. It’s obvious and we’ve seen this before. It’s how Abraham died. He suffered tremendous guilt over what happened to his family and this was the crux of his whole arc and he finally redeemed himself in the end by willingly sacrificing himself for TF. We’ve even seen C@rol attempt to do this. We can assume she would have traded places with Beth if possible and we saw her lack of care for her own safety during The Same Boat. If her death would have saved Maggie she would have died for her. When giving her own life for someone else’s failed C@rol even taunted a Savior and begged him to kill her for what she had done. While it would make sense for C@rol to give up her own life for her redemption I think narratively it is very unlikely that will happen. The narrative seems to indicate very clearly that C@rol has a different future ahead of her. So in order to C@rol to finally be able to forgive herself she must atone for her original misdeed by saving two lives that would otherwise be lost and to make this arc wrap up in an even neater little bow the saving of these two lives should somehow link back to Sophia and the origin of C@rol’s arc. It is then that C@rol will achieve her true destiny.

               So how does C@rol save two lives and repeat the Sophia arc with a different result finally balancing her scales so that she can have peace. Well Sophia was C@rol’s first attempt at saving a lost daughter, according to Kirkman Beth was C@rol’s second attempt at saving a lost daughter, so the third attempt at saving a lost daughter should be her final act of redemption. During that attempt C@rol should not only save a daughter figure but in doing so she should save not one life but two redeeming herself for taking Karen and David’s lives and recognizing that there was a purpose to Beth saving her life at Grady. I would go as far as to speculate that for this arc to truly be closed C@rol will need to go in to save her daughter figure alone. Daryl has always been trying to save Sophia for C@rol and he’s never able to because it was never his destiny to be the savior. It was always C@rol’s destiny to overcome and be the savior.  With Sophia C@rol let Daryl do the searching, with Beth C@rol went with Daryl but it was Daryl who orchestrated the rescue, with this final daughter C@rol will need to go in on her own and she will finally be able to rescue her daughter once and for all. So speculation like this leads to questions about how a scenario like this could arise. What would narratively have to happen in order for C@rol to be able to achieve this final redemption and if she is destined to just rescue a daughter figure how is she saving not one life but two.

               So this brings me back to Daryl who is a reluctant hero who appears to be about to embark or who may already have embarked on an antihero arc. By definition an anti hero is a reluctant who has a major flaw or foible such as selfishness which creates obstacles to the character becoming a true hero.  The reason I think Daryl may have strayed into anti hero territory is because  his actions since losing his creed (the things Beth taught him) have bordered on irrational and it could be argued at points have been very selfish. When Glenn begged Daryl to go back to Alexandria he should have. His desire to pursue Dwight at that point was purely selfish as there was no real good that could have been derived from it.  It also appears that Daryl will be going rouge this season and possibly pursuing his own agenda over what might be best for the greater good of the group.  All of this puts Daryl more than likely squarely in the category of an anti hero. The good news is that an anti hero typically ends their journey by overcoming obstacles and becoming a fuller, happier, and more complete person.  It could also be argued that Daryl is treading a pretty fine line between a reluctant hero and an anti hero but I think in the end Daryl’s transformation will lead to him becoming a worthy leader. However in order get to his leadership arc Daryl will need to resolve whatever is driving his current irrational behavior. It’s also important to note that TWD is not a big fan of typical heroes. Rick is also very much an anti hero type persona. TWD likes it’s heroes to be complex and to have a lot of depth which I personally prefer. I noted earlier that I considered it important to note that Beth “died” at Grady because she couldn’t let go of her anger and back down from Dawn. The reason I think that is important is because we are now seeing Daryl on a very similar trajectory. The state of mind that led to Beth making the decisions she did at Grady is the same state of mind Daryl is currently stuck in. If something doesn’t bring him out of that mindset Daryl will do something similar to what Beth did.

               I think in order to understand what might pull Daryl out of this mindset it’s important to understand why he is stuck in it to begin with. A lot of articles talk about how Daryl is suffering because of what happened to Glenn and because he feels guilt over that. But the larger question is why did Daryl do what he did causing what happened to Glenn in the first place. In order to understand where Daryl is at in his own head we must go all the way back to S4 after the fall of the prison. At that point in time Daryl was blaming himself and in pain because he truly believed that his family was most likely all dead and that possibly he could have done something to prevent that. Beth reached out and touched a place within Daryl that no other character ever had and for the first time in the series we see a Daryl who is completely happy, at ease, and physically demonstrative with another human being. This is the first time we see Daryl in that way and also quite sadly the last time.  After losing Beth Daryl remains hopeful and present sure that she will be returned to him. It isn’t until she is actually shot at Grady that we see Daryl begin to regress. That regression begins a slow back slide that starts out with Daryl being numb and shut down. He’s present in body but not in mind. When C@rol approaches Daryl about Beth and gives him her knife he begins to feel a little pain. He burns himself with the cigarette to feel physical pain so that he can begin to feel at least something and he uses that to begin to feel his loss. It would be at this point though that I think Daryl begins to bargain with himself. What I mean by that is that Daryl takes a page from Beth’s book and he begins to do something. He fixes the music box for Maggie and after arriving in the ASZ he begins to try to help people by recruiting with Aaron. Daryl is trying to save good people because Beth believed in good people and Daryl desperately needs to believe in something with Beth gone. Unfortunately in trying to save good people Daryl runs into Dwight and Sherry and his interactions with them lead to Denise being killed. That for Daryl would have been the ultimate kick in the gut because his attempts at trying to help good people got a good person killed and in a lot of ways Denise reminded Daryl of Beth. Losing Denise was like losing Beth all over again for Daryl and that’s when we see him begin to slide into a much darker place. I think as he’s burying Denise that Daryl drinks the liquor more to honor Beth than to honor Denise. I think the reason C@rol is so morose in this scene is because she understands that. Daryl never properly mourned Beth and losing a woman who reminded Daryl of Beth brings all that pain back full force. It’s then that Daryl’s anger takes over leading to him refusing to go back to the ASZ when Glenn asks and eventually to Glenn’s death. I believe that Daryl never considered that his outburst would get Glenn killed. I believe he was depressed and so lost at that point that he assumed his outburst would lead to his own death. However Daryl has to reflect about the fact that Glenn begged him to go back to the ASZ and that if he had done so then Glenn may never have been in the Negan line up. So I think Daryl feels guilt over Glenn’s death for two reasons one because if he had listened to Glenn and gone home than Glenn might not have been in the line up and two because Daryl’s outburst is what lead to Glenn’s death.  But it’s also important to understand that Daryl’s current state of mind did not originate from Glenn. Daryl’s current rogue behavior and the behavior he has shown in front of Negan both in 7X1 and 7X3 shows a man who has lost all hope and who doesn’t care if he lives or dies. Those feelings were there within Daryl before Glenn’s death and even killing Negan and avenging Glenn would not make them go away because they are much more complex than that. Those feelings that Daryl is feeling go all the way back to losing Beth. That’s the origin of Daryl falling apart. His continued downward spiral was hastened by losing Denise and then Glenn but the origin of Daryl’s pain comes from losing Beth.

               So the big question for Daryl is how do the writers save him? We know that Beth’s irrational anger towards Dawn led to her being shot and we can assume that Daryl’s similar behavior unchecked will lead to the same result but how can the writers stop that? Daryl could kill Negan to avenge Glenn and kill Dwight to avenge Denise and in the end he would still be left with the hurt and pain that began this awful downward spiral to his own personal hell. Daryl was simply trying to honor Beth when he attempted to help Sherry and Dwight and if he had simply paused after her death to consider that all the pain and heartache that followed might have been avoided. However Daryl was a powder keg waiting to explode and Denise’s death was simply the charge that set him off. Daryl’s pain originates from losing Beth and until the writers have him confront that and deal with it he won’t be able to pull himself from the path he’s currently locked into. Anyone who thinks Daryl will be magically better because he kills Dwight and Negan is deluding themselves because it’s fairly clear that Negan is on a one way trip to Morgan’s cell and Dwight will be on a redemption arc.  So those options are nonexistent and the further interesting thing is TPTB have shown us how Daryl heals from anger and pain. We witnessed that during Still when Beth held Daryl. That was a true catharsis for Daryl and he will only be free of the amount of pain he is feeling when he is able to do that again.  Knowing that we have to consider what circumstances might lead to Daryl being able to experience that catharsis and what characters would be involved in helping him through it. It is difficult to imagine any of the current characters would be able to help Daryl in the same way Beth did. If they could, if they understood how to help him in the way that Beth understood, they would have done so already. No one has because as angry as Daryl is no one understands how to reach him.  In order for Daryl to come to terms with where he is now, being a rouge character, and grow beyond that to the leader he is intended to be he will need to resolve his anger in a similar circumstance to what we already saw in Still otherwise his only path forward at this point is eventual death in circumstances similar to Beth.

               So the fun part to me is to speculate on what is still to come. If C@rol and Daryl’s arc have always been leading to this point and I believe that they have then we can assume through what narrative we’ve seen so far that both of their arcs resolve in S8 along with the resolution of the Saviors and therefore Negan’s arc. So given those parameters and what we know so far how could that happen? How could C@rol save a daughter figure who has gone missing from the group and at the same time save not one life but two finally achieving her redemption? So we have to look at clues in the narrative to understand how this might come about. First of all we can assume that the daughter C@rol rescues is taken by Negan and we can assume that because the resolution of C@rol and Daryl’s arcs should be tied to Negan.  I am also going to go out on a limb here and make a prediction that when C@rol saves her daughter figure the other life she will be saving by doing so is actually Daryl’s. Whoever C@rol saves will be directly involved with the catharsis Daryl needs to undergo to finally purge the pain he has been carrying with him since losing Beth. C@rol and Daryl’s arcs have always been intertwined around this missing girl plot so it only makes sense that they should both experience character arc resolutions because of a missing girl. I would also point out some other clues we saw in the narrative last season. Negan was especially interested in Maggie leading Father Gabriel to even dig a grave for her claiming that she had died so that Negan assumed she was no longer available. While Daryl is at the Sanctuary he is exposed to what Negan does to the woman he takes as his wives. It seems the writers wanted him to understand in particular what happens to these woman. Maybe the writers made Negan especially interested in Maggie so that he could be especially stunned later when he realized she wasn’t dead. Maybe Daryl is exposed to the goings on at the Sanctuary simply so that he could have more empathy for Dwight and Sherry later. Or maybe all those little pieces mean something more. I think it’s also especially interesting that Eugene is currently the only TF member inside the Sanctuary and guess where he was during Grady when everyone else was witnessing Daryl carrying Beth out of the hospital. He was passed out in the firetruck because of Abraham knocking him out in the previous episode. I would also point out that the writers have gone out of their way to create some pretty intricate parallels and anti parallels between Daryl and Beth and Dwight and Sherry. I have a whole separate post where I’ve talked about that.

               So after drawing all the pieces of this story together and outlining how I think S8 might finally resolve once and for all C@rol and Daryl’s arcs I will let each person decide on their own who the missing girl might be. Do I have a head cannon about who the missing girl is and how this might play out? Absolutely but I will let everyone form their own opinion about who the missing girl is. All I will say is that whoever she is she needs to be someone that C@rol regards as a daughter figure and whose rescue will bring about a Still like catharsis for Daryl. That is the only way C@rol and Daryl’s arcs will come to a close.

[raggywaltz1954]

This is the big one.  The unicorn.  The white whale.  The record that woke the vinyl collector within me.  The search for this record took years, but this year the vinyl gods smiled on me, and I am now the owner of this rare bootleg album.  One of the reasons why I’ve been on the hunt for this album is because it’s only available on vinyl.  It was because of this and other rare Brubeck and Desmond music that’s only on vinyl that started me on the journey of record collecting.  Naturally, this record has a rather unconventional background.  But first…

The Music

Tune:  Two-part Contention

Recorded live 25 August, 1956 at Basin Street, New York City

Personnel:

Dave Brubeck-  Piano

Paul Desmond-  Alto Sax

Norman Bates-  Bass

Joe Dodge-  Drums

This album is a super bootleg album made up of at least two different radio broadcasts of Dave Brubeck performances, one from 1959 and the other from 1956.  Side one is a broadcast from a December 1959 Carnegie Hall performance featuring the Dave Brubeck Quartet with the New York Philharmonic, conducted by Leonard Bernstein.  They play “Dialogues for Jazz Combo and Orchestra” by Dave’s brother Howard.  The music was eventually recorded in the studio the next month and came out on the Columbia album ‘Bernstein Plays Brubeck Plays Bernstein’.  The liner notes to that album mention that there three Carnegie Hall performances of the work on December 10, 11, and 13, 1959, so this broadcast is from one of those dates.  By the sound of the music (stiff, tentative, with a few ‘mistakes’ compared to the studio album), I’d peg it closer to the December 10th date.  The preservation of this performance on record is a great historical document and it’s interesting to compare this with the official Columbia release, but I’m more excited and interested in the other side of the album.

The main reason why I wanted to find this album was for the music on the second side of the album.  The two tracks allegedly stem from a Basin Street club date on 25 August, 1956.  I say allegedly because the two tracks differ in sound quality, which makes me wonder if they’re from two separate dates.  Putting on my Sherlock hat (i.e. serious Googling), I discovered a very detailed schedule of the NBC radio show Monitor from the weekend of August 24-26, 1956.  Scheduled for late Saturday night, August 25 at 11pm Eastern Standard Time was live music from Dave Brubeck at Basin Street, in New York City.  I don’t know where the 25 August, 1956 date came from originally, but it looks like it’s accurate.

Dave Brubeck was frequently on Monitor during the mid-1950’s as well as other jazz shows on the radio, and a few of these live airchecks have turned up on bootleg CDs and records over the years, but nowhere near as many have surfaced as similar radio broadcasts from Miles Davis.  The few Brubeck radio broadcasts that have showed up typically have Paul Desmond and Brubeck in great form.  Live Brubeck is the best Brubeck, especially when it’s a club date.  This particular lineup provided Desmond and Brubeck with a solid foundation to really stretch out and play some tasty stuff, as Desmond does on the cut above.

‘Two-part Contention’ is a Brubeck original, being a play on words based off of Bach’s ‘Two-part Invention’.  The contention comes from the changing rhythms and soloists.  After some improvised counterpoint, Paul Desmond launches into his solo, followed by the slower section featuring Brubeck’s piano.  It’s the fast section after this that Desmond really shines.  He throws a lot of different quotes in his solo, including the melody of Gerry Mulligan’s ‘Limelight’, and Brubeck follows with a solo that references the old standard ‘I Get A Kick Out of You’, before concluding the performance at the twelve and a half-minute mark.  Joe Dodge’s drumming is simple, basic, but solid.  His successor, Joe Morello, had a much more powerful and noticeable presence on the drums, but I like Dodge’s drumming.  His occasional accents and spare playing (he only used a bass drum, snare, hi-hat, and two cymbals) are a welcome contrast to the many busy jazz drummers popular then and now.

Being a club date, there’s applause, rattling dishes, and the buzz of conversation, but it’s hardly intrusive.  Taken with the info above, it’s a great example of late-night jazz from a jazz club, as heard on somebody’s radio in 1956.  I wonder if people back in the 1950’s truly appreciated those days of radio when you could flip a switch and catch a club date from Miles Davis, Dave Brubeck, Thelonious Monk, and the other jazz greats, with barely any commercials?  Those days surely aren’t coming back.

The Cover

College Jazz Collector Rating:  D+

It’s extremely basic, the cover is.  Of course it’s a bootleg, so the bar is already low.  We get treated to three stencil-like reproductions of a Brubeck photograph and an actual photograph of Leonard Bernstein himself, surrounded by a frame of… rope?  Flowery banner?  I’m not sure.  What’s up with the ‘stereo-mono’ up there, too?  The lack of any color all makes for bland cover, typical of a bootleg album.  It looks like it was made in someone’s basement.  More on that later.  The album came sealed in shrink-wrap (!), but still has signs of a rough life, including a tattered upper spine and bent edges.

The Back

This album takes minimalism to another level.  There’s absolutely nothing on the back of it.  Not a thing.  This is the only album I have that has a completely blank back.  It’s actually kind of neat.  The bootlegger provided all of the info on the front and felt that none was needed on the back, I suppose.

The Vinyl

The vinyl is extremely thin and flimsy, non-deep groove, but in mint condition.  The labels continue the trend of little information.  The info that is there is partially incorrect.  ‘Musical Montage’ as labeled on the cover and the label is completely false, and is in fact the musical work by Howard Brubeck entitled ‘Dialogues for Jazz Combo and Orchestra’, and the four different ‘musical montages’ are ‘Allegro’, ‘Andante-Ballad’, ‘Adagio-Ballad’, and ‘Allegro-Blues’.  The four movements aren’t separated on the record, instead lumped together as one big block of music as it’s performed on the record.  There were slight pauses between each movement, but the record presser didn’t bother to separate them.

The sound quality is amazingly clean for being taped off of the radio.  Despite the ‘stereo-mono’ label on the cover, the music on both sides of the record are in mono.

I did some research on the Ozone label, as I was unfamiliar with it, and was surprised to discover that this album was recorded by the legendary jazz bootlegger- I mean archivist- Boris Rose.  Boris Rose was a man from New York City that tirelessly captured live jazz performances of some of the greatest jazz musicians on his portable tape recorders, either by taking them illicitly into clubs (particularly Birdland) or taping radio broadcasts from his home.  During jazz’s golden era of the 1950’s and 60’s, Rose documented the jazz that came through New York and meticulously kept written records of the tapes he made.  He amassed quite an archive of valuable live music, and the whole operation was conducted in his basement.

Rose traded tapes between like-minded friends, and in the 1970’s began pressing some of his tapes to records and sold them in small quantities on a variety of made-up labels, such as Alto, Ozone and Session Disc.   Apparently he didn’t like serious record collectors and discographers (ironic given his meticulous record keeping) and consequently provided little or purposefully wrong information on his albums.

I found about Boris Rose before I bought this album though, through late-night internet searches for rare live jazz performances.  I always wondered if Rose had captured the Dave Brubeck Quartet on tape, and it looks like he did and that there’s possibly more.  An article from the Wall Street Journal about Rose has made the rounds on different websites, and it is in the spirit of Boris Rose that I bootleg a bootlegged article.  Bon appetit!

Wall Street Journal December 4, 2010

http://online.wsj.com/article/SB10001424052748704354704575651483072044218.html

Elaine Rose, daughter of famed jazz archivist Boris Rose, holds a portrait of her father in front of a small portion of his many master tape recordings from Birdland and a number of other New York jazz venues.

In a dark basement in a quiet residential neighborhood in the Bronx, a well-known archive of privately recorded live tapes and acetates is gathering dust and waiting for some institution to acquire it. The Boris Rose archive, named for the New Yorker who amassed it, is so capacious, in fact, that no one has even cataloged all of it and Elaine Rose, who has owned it since her father died 10 years ago, can’t even begin to guess how much it’s worth.

“This collection certainly deserves to be in a major institution, such as the Smithsonian, Library of Congress, or Institute of Jazz Studies—intact,” said John Hasse, the curator of American music at the Smithsonian Institution.

The collection contains everything from rare performances by modern jazz legends like Charlie Parker and John Coltrane to swing stars like Benny Goodman, Count Basie and Mr. Rose’s own favorites, like Sidney Bechet and Eddie Condon. Ms. Rose is well aware of the need for finding a permanent repository; the acetates and the tapes are, she said, in delicate condition.

“It needs a home. I just can’t keep it in storage. I’m giving myself a time frame of six months to a year to do something with it,” she said.

Boris Rose (1918-2000) was one of those legendary characters who seem to proliferate in the world of jazz. He was tall, articulate, always very well groomed—and by all accounts an outrageous character. An inveterate prankster, he dreamed up a dizzying array of fake label names (including “Titania,” “Ambrosia,” “Caliban,” “Session Disc,” “Ozone” and “Chazzer Records”), many of which he tried to pass off as European imports. Most of his albums bore an address on the front, such as “A Product of Stockholm, Sweden.” But if you looked closely on the back, it would say something like “Manufactured in Madison, Wisconsin” in much smaller type.

The truth was that Mr. Rose produced them all from his brownstone on East 10th Street. He told me once that he took great delight in confounding collectors and discographers, whom he regarded as the bean counters of jazz.

“I always felt something about jazz,” Mr. Rose said in an undated interview with historian Dan Morgenstern that was taped for German television. “As far back as 1930, I listened to broadcasts from the Cotton Club. I heard Duke, I heard Don Redman, I heard Cab Callaway.”

During his years at City College, Mr. Rose practiced the c-melody saxophone but began to find his calling when he got a job at the MRM Music Shop on Nassau Street.

“As far back as 1940, I purchased a home [disc-cutter] recorder and I began to dub records,” he told Mr. Morgenstern. “For the next few years while I was in the Army, I was able to dub records for collectors who couldn’t find the originals.”

From there, he branched out to recording radio broadcasts and then live bands in clubs. “Getting out of the Army in 1946, I had professional equipment, and began to take down all of these jazz broadcasts,” he explained. “First on 16-inch acetate discs. Later on, when tape came into the picture, I was able to record on tape.”

Mr. Morgenstern remembers Mr. Rose as “a man who never sat down—he was always monitoring three or four tape recorders or disc-cutters at any given time.” For decades, Mr. Rose ran a thriving business, recording jazz wherever he could, then making and selling copies or trading them for rarer material.

He operated from 10th Street, but stored most of his original tapes and acetates in the basement of his house in the Bronx, where he raised his three daughters.

One of Rose’s tape recorders

It’s still fairly well-organized: Discs are mostly in one area; soundtracks are in one set of cabinets; 10-inch reels are in one spot and 7-inch reels in another. 78 RPM discs and LPs are all over the place. A thick layer of dust rests on top of everything, but considering the vastness of the collection, the few tapes I recently took out and examined seemed to be in good shape—though neither tape nor shellac will last forever.

Mr. Rose kept detailed notebooks of almost every recording he made. The trick, though, is to find the tape to match the written entry.

“We won’t know what’s in there—or what shape it’s in—until somebody wants it,” Ms. Rose said.

The centerpiece of the Rose archive is the Birdland Collection: Mr. Rose recorded virtually every band that played this most legendary of jazz joints, either directly off the airwaves or by smuggling a concealed tape recorder into the club.

Over time he amassed a spectacular library of modern jazz from the glory years—the 1950s. His friends found this amazing since he rarely listened to the stuff himself; his own tastes ran to Louis Armstrong and Kid Ory. Still, he documented an entire era of music, the great majority of which hasn’t been heard in 60 years.

Around 1970, Mr. Rose’s business entered a new phase when he began using some of his material for mass-produced LPs that were distributed internationally, generally bearing amateur-looking artwork and misleading information. According to friend and researcher Arthur Zimmerman, Mr. Rose rarely if ever bothered to negotiate with the actual musicians or pay mechanical royalties for the compositions (with the exception of several country albums by Gene Autry, after the singing cowboy’s lawyers got in touch). He sold Charlie Parker and Billie Holiday material to ESP Records, and a famous double-LP set of Parker at Birdland to Columbia Records.

In the end, Mr. Rose released hundreds of albums, under dozens of label names, up through the mid-’80s. When compact discs took over, he gradually lost interest. In the ’90s, he made it known that the archive was for sale, but kept raising the price whenever anybody expressed interest.

“He left it to me so I could have an income,” said Elaine Rose. “His words to me were, ‘Make money with it.’ But it’s a whole different era now.”

That was in 2010.  I’ve tried to find out what happened in the seven years since, but haven’t found a thing.  I sure hope somebody with more money than me takes interest in it.

The Place of Acquisition

Good old eBay.  After an almost six-year search, I found this album for sale online as ‘Buy Now’ for $20, sealed and in mint condition.  It’s only shown up once on Discogs since 2011, and I barely missed a sale on eBay last year.  Good things come to those that wait.  Like the other rare Brubeck bootleg album, I clicked ‘Buy Now’ quick, and in a week I was the proud owner of this album, probably one of the rarest if not the rarest album in my collection.  A search on Popsike only turned up one result, and that was my own purchase on eBay.  Despite its rarity, it doesn’t seem to go for much.  A sale on Discogs ended at $10.00 and some change.  Either the people selling it don’t realize it’s worth or it’s really just not that valuable.  Any thoughts and comments would be appreciated!

Dave Brubeck, Leonard Bernstein, Dialogue For Jazz Combo & Orchestra // Ozone (Ozone 14) This is the big one.  The unicorn.  The white whale.  The record that woke the vinyl collector within me.  

[batesmotel]

Ferb A: Bates Motel Final Fan Fic

Norman slammed the trunk of the car before looking around the Bates Motel parking lot. It was empty. Nothing but leaves scooting along the empty gravel space. His eyes shifted towards the office where he spent so many hours of the past five years of his life. Going through the mail, typing up the motel newsletter, making coffee every morning and all his manager duties. The many times he stood behind that counter and greeted his guests with a smile as they signed the guest book. How it felt to hand over that room key. He was somebody. This motel made him someone. From student to employee, to manager and to owner. This motel has seen it's days long before the Bates moved in but, it saw it's best days these past few years. They made this place into a home. Mother made this place a home and together they built this little paradise. The motel helped them just as much as they helped it. Norman reached up to place his hand on his chest where his Manager pin use to sit. He would always trace the letters with his finger and feel so proud of himself. He remembered his first day. Norman Bates was so excited he wanted to make such a great impression. He had a sense of real responsibility. He wasn't sure how many different blazer combos he went through. He had to look the part right? It was representing this motel and his mother. When he didn't feel the pin there he felt this sort of emptiness fill his chest. His eyes skimmed down the line of room. Each one held it's own story. Each one had a customer that Norman would never forget. Gunner and his band of stoners, the spooky man in Room 9, the lovely family who had the puppies, Annika Johnson, Alex Romero, Marion... He could go on. They were gone and they wouldn't think of this place ever again. The sun was slowly making its way down the sky threatening to disappear at any moment. Norman could hear the soft song of birds as he walked across the driveway. Entering the office he looked around a few times. The smell of coffee and freshly sharpened pencils lingered. It was nice. His hand moved along the front desk and over the guest book that hadn't been touched in many weeks. He remembered the last person to sign it and she would always have a spot in his brain. Moving his way into the back office he let out a heavy sigh. He remembered when this place was filled with boxes upon boxes of dusty old files and old photos and newspaper articles. Norman had completely gone through all of them and turned those dusty boxes into a few simple little files. That contained the history of this place along with those old photos that new sat in the filing cabinet. Turning his head he smirked a little when he saw that old picture on the wall. The peep hole behind it had been filled in and now it was just a regular old picture. He dropped his head as visions of what he's seen on the other side of that wall popped into his mind. He got that chill as he flipped off the light and made his way back to the front office. Reaching out he hit that switch and the Bates Motel light flickered on. The low hum of it's lights was all he could hear as he stepped out into that still evening air. A deep breath left his lungs as he watched the sign bring life to this place once more. Closing his eyes he could still hear the sounds of his guests. Cars pulling in and out of the drive. Dylan sitting over there in that empty chair enjoying an evening beer. The sounds of children laughing and the TV's turning on just loud enough he could slightly hear it from his post behind the desk. "It's such a nice place you have here." "We've been driving for hours so glad we found you." "You're really cleaning this place up kid." "Our stay was wonderful." "I'm going to give you a good review on Yelp!" "Thank you Norman Bates." It all made him smile till he opened his eyes and it was just him. Norman made his way up towards the long set of steps that reached all the way up to that damn old house on the hill. The windows lit up looking alive as he climbed those steps. God how many times did he run up these stairs? If these damn steps could talk. The time him and Dylan had to carry Mother's mattress all the down to the dumpster. He stopped and looked at the faint stain where Shelby bled out all over the place. That time Dylan slipped on the frost and nearly broke his neck. That time Norman gave Emma a piggyback ride all the way up because she was having a bad day with her breathing. The fights that went on, on these stairs. The hugs that happened. The stories that were told. How many times he sat there on that step and just had his Norman thinking time. "She can't do this! She can't leave me!" "Norman let her go!" Climbing that last step as he crossed the porch he reached out and opened that front door. The moment he closed it he was met with complete silence. This house has never been that quiet. There was this twist in his stomach and he had to take a moment to get a grip. Norman looked to his left into the living room. That old fireplace and that couch where he spent many evenings watching TV or reading or doing his homework. Norman stepped further into the room and his hand moved along the back of the couch. Feeling the material against his skin he gave a small smile. The room was dim except for a small light on the side table in the corner. The walls that were filled with photos were now taken down. Removed. Norman looked at that piano sitting in the corner and for a split second he thought he could hear it play. His heart skipped a beat as he remembered that time Mother forced him to sing Mr. Sandman with her. Their many duets and he couldn't count how many times he sat there with her as she played. Trying to teach him here and there but he could only manage to get Twinkle Twinkle Little Star just right. She was the piano player in this family. Reaching out he debated hitting a key and decided against it. The last sound that piano would make was the last song Mother ever played. Instead he moved his hand to the left and turned the light off. Norman walked down the short hall into the kitchen. Dishes use to stack high in the sink and on the table. Piles of old newspaper stacked on one of the chairs. The counter wasn't cleaned. The stove was a mess with pots and pans littered all over it. The fridge was empty and the floor hadn't been swept. Norman let this place go and he was ashamed of that. That's why he took it upon himself this morning to clean every inch of this kitchen. Just how she wanted it. Just how she left it. He could hear the sizzle of the frying pan and the smell of pot roast in the oven. The table was set and decorated with fresh flowers. He could hear that hum as Mother moved along the room. This was her work space. This was her happy place. It made Norman smile before he turned to head down into the basement. The basement flooded with light with that flip of the switch. Norman's steps echoed as he climbed down those old wood steps. Looking around the place was pretty dusty but Norman didn't touch too much down here. Just his work space and new repaired furnace on those chilled evenings and the freezer. Looking over his work station everything was cleaned up. A faint dust rested upon the table's surface where his taxidermy equipment use to sit. Boxes of old junk filled the shelves and after all these years Norman never touched any of it. Opening the freezer it was now warm as it had been shutoff. None of the freezers worked anymore and there was still that old yellow caution taped strung here and there. That sickening crime scene tape that only made his stomach burn. There was still some of his creations hiding down here. They would be left behind. Just as Norman was about to leave he stopped seeing a dusty book just under the step. Curious he reached down and pulled it from it's hiding spot. Blowing the dust off the cover it was that old taxidermy book Mother had gotten him years ago. He wondered where it had gone. He felt his heart swell as he exited the basement and turned the lights off one last time before shutting the door. He walked past the laundry room that was all cleaned out. Passing the kitchen he set the book down on the table before going upstairs. He was met with the memories of all those fights they had. The stomping of steps met his ears and the shouting echoed around the house. "Norman please!" "I don't trust you anymore and that changes everything!" "Stop it Norman." "The game was we were devoted to each other. That no one could ever come between us. We loved each other more than anyone could love another person." Norman could hear it all. The crying and the slam of the door. These doors slammed a lot in this house. The stomping of steps and the anger that would fill the upstairs. Norman was met with his bedroom door wide open. Standing in the doorway he skimmed as everything looked to be in place. Bed was made. The desk was cleaned off. The bookcase was empty. He could still hear the pitter-patter of Juno's paws as she ran through the house. How many times was Norman confined to that bed? After one of his blackouts or being sick or after being stuck in a box for a few days. The room still faintly smelled like books and laundry cleaner. Norman looked at the door connecting the two bedrooms. This door still didn't shut or lock right ever since he broke it that one day. Despite the upstairs having so many horrible moments it had it's good. Norman turned off the light and shut the door. Walking by the bathroom that smelled of bleach he went to Dylan's old room. It was kinda how Dylan left it except Norman did go in and straighten things up. Few things on the walls. Mainly pictures of cars and hunting photos and girls. Random football and gun magazines on the floor. He left behind a couple shirts and a hat or two. Norman gathered up the left behind trash and tossed it into the bin near the door. It had that Dylan musk mixed with dust lingering in the air. Dylan... "I'm a man now not her little boy and I wanna be a good man. I trust your judgment if you think this is the right thing to do. You're my brother, you know? I wanna be there for you. We're a family and we love each other we'll work through it." "Get her back, Dylan! Get her back!" "Calm down! You have to!! She's coming back!" "She's not gonna come back! She hates me! She hates me Dylan and it's all your fault!" "Please, Norman.. Everything I've built with Mom, it'll, it'll all be destroyed." "You wouldn't actually hurt anybody though, would you Norman?" Norman stood in the doorway of Mother's room. The last room in the house he wanted to be. The light near the window was on and there was this welcoming glow to it. Hands in his pockets he stepped further into the room. This warm air wrapped around him and he could smell her perfume. Norman closed his eyes and got lost for a moment. He could feel her. Her arms wrapped around him so tightly. Pulling him in for a hug as she kissed his cheek. He could feel her warm embrace as she ran her hand through his hair. That smile on her face. A smile that was burned into his mind. That bright beautiful smile of a woman who was finally happy and finally at peace with the craziness around her. A woman who overcome everything life thrown her way. She was a warrior and she was his hero. "I love you, Norman." "I love you too, Mother." "You mean more to me than anyone in the world." The voices echoed in his head she was still there. Smiling brightly at him as she took his hands and gave them a firm squeeze. There was this bubble building up in his chest. This emotion was building and it was making it's way into his throat. "Hey.." Her voice was soft and comforting. "You're a good boy, Norman." She bit her lip and thought for a second. Norman's misty eyes were focused on her as she spoke so softly. "You're everything. Everything to me Norman." She leaned in and pressed another kiss to his cheek. "There's a cord between our hearts." Those memories of that night on the lake came flooding back to him at her words. He couldn't form any of his own at the moment as tears fought to fall from his baby blue eyes. He suddenly didn't want to let go. He couldn't let go. He couldn't let go of her. That familiar pull and power she had over him all these years was slowly creeping back into him. His hands grasped hers tightly and she gave him a sad smile. "It will be okay. Got it? YOU can do THIS." Norman softly nodded his head and she pressed a kiss to the corner of his mouth as she playfully added. "Now get the hell outta here." Norman's eyes flew open and frantically looked for her. The bed, the closet, near the window, behind him. She wasn't there. His hands shook as he brought them up to his face. Taking a moment to collect himself. That warm embrace he had felt was gone. The smell of her perfume was no longer in the air. It just a still room that held so many memories that were now put to rest. Forcing himself he crossed the room and turned the light off. He took a second to brush his hand over freshly washed bedspread. The silence in the room was making his ears hurt. Looking over towards the closet where all her dress use to be.. You can do this Norman. With that Norman walked out of the room and shut the door behind him. Making his way quickly down the stairs he dropped by the kitchen again. Reaching out and collecting the book he had set there. One last look around he gave a firm nod. As he headed for the front door he stopped suddenly. There it was. He could hear that old record player turn on as Bobby Darin faintly filled the house. There it was again. That pull. That desire to stay with her. His hand grasped the door handle and he got his grip again and walked out of that old house on the hill. Locking it up behind him he could still hear that old tune as he climbed down the stairs. The sun was nearly down casting the sky in this pinkish orange. He looked out at that parking lot, the Bates Motel sign lit high above. The For Sale sign stuck just below the No Vacancy sign. He would never see this again. His heart pounded so hard in his chest as he made his way towards the car. Tossing the book in through the window. "We came here to start over, I am starting over." "We've been through a lot and this is our chance to start over." Norman Bates looked up at that old house that had been his home as well as his prison for the past years. Piling in this damn car with whatever it could hold and moving to White Pine Bay was an adventure. A town full of weirdos who at first didn't welcome the Mother and Son but then found them worthy to be apart of their community. Moving here and running this motel was a fight for survival, a fight for acceptance and a fight to succeed. Behind all this fighting was just a family trying to find their place in the world. Trying to start over and along the way only grew strong and bigger. Many had doubted them and they hit a lot of roadblocks. This wasn't your average family. Just a confused, loving boy and his Mother trying to make a life for themselves. Sure this rundown motel and that old house might have seen it's share of tears and blood and bodies but also laughter and undying love. This old house. This old motel. Was just a spot on the road but it was a dream. It was her dream. "We own a motel, Norman Bates!" A few tears fell from Norman's eyes but he quickly brushed them away. Suddenly he couldn't hear that old record player anymore. No longer could he feel the soul that had been dancing her heart away in that old house. For the first time in his life he was alone. Truly alone. Mother was gone. Giving the Bates Motel sign one last smile Norman climbed into his car and pulled out of that drive way, never looking back. The End..

[junker-town]

The Toronto Raptors keep evolving instead of breaking

Toronto is modernizing its style and strengths even if an NBA title remains out of reach.

The Biosteel Centre has become the laboratory for the Toronto Raptors' reinvention experiments. During the tail-end of practices that are open to media observation, one can find four rims occupied by shooters, a hat-tip to their designs on internal improvement from beyond the arc. In the far-right corner, a fifth and final hoop is dedicated to the harder, non-habitual challenge of the Raptors' "culture reset" that is playing out, for the most part, on the offensive end.

Lorenzo Brown stands at the top of the key and receives a pick from Jakob Poeltl, who catches the ball on the roll, and bulldozes into assistant coach Nick Nurse, who is trying to stave off the 7-foot center with two pads. Instead of trying to finish through contact, Poeltl fires a drive-and-kick pass to Alfonzo McKinnie, in the corner, who misses a three. After a few more reps, Lucas Nogueira takes Poeltl's place. After that, it's the much-maligned Jonas Valanciunas, who, after a couple tries, starts hitting McKinnie right in the pocket.

“On time, on target passes. It’s something I know guys ad nauseam get tired of us talking about it and emphasizing,” says head coach Dwane Casey. “But I'm a firm believer that you are what you emphasize.”

The Raptors’ plan to bring back largely the same personnel for the 2017-18 season yet introduce a modern, pass-happy, 3-point heavy offense was met with reasonable skepticism. It felt like a stilted mandate, the plan of a team that acknowledges the problem but can't muster a solution. If they wanted to change things, why re-sign Kyle Lowry and Serge Ibaka to cap-killing deals, and retain Casey as coach?

Dan Hamilton-USA TODAY Sports

So far, they've made it work. At 15-7, the Raptors run the NBA’s fourth-most efficient offense. After finishing second-to-last in the NBA last season in assist ratio — the percentage of a team’s baskets that are assisted — they’re now in the top five. Casey’s goal, in training camp, was to shoot 30 treys per game. They’re shooting 32. The Raptors have always been able to rack them up, but their attack this season is more well-balanced, and they hope, harder to solve in the playoffs. In that regard, they’re certainly less solvable, but they’re still squarely behind the Cavs in Celtics in the Eastern Conference pecking order.

ERGE. #RTZ http://pic.twitter.com/3rKCOaS6h3

— Toronto Raptors (@Raptors) December 9, 2017

The Raptors, in the end, represent high aspirations with middling results. That is the story of most of us, and most of us don't wallow and recede merely because even at our best, we couldn't be astrophysicists. We try, and sometimes fail, to be good friends, good family members, good employees. Professional sports, of course, veer toward more win-or-go home propositions. Yet the sense of dread that accompanies most good-but-not great teams is conspicuously absent in Toronto. It is hard, it turns out, for mediocrity to become the expressed persona of a team that is so dedicated to maximizing its abilities.

As the Raptors inch closer and closer to their collective best, it is painfully clear they are a cut below elite. Yet the organization is filled to the brim with people who, everyday, are striving to be better teammates and coaches.

Photo by Andy Lyons/Getty Images

Whether or not the Raptors truly believe or don't believe they can win a championship is a question best left to psychics. But I can say this: Professional athletes are so defiant, so single-minded, that if the opponent was gravity, they'd fervently contend that it's still anybody's game in the middle of a free-fall. The Raptors, who ran into LeBron two playoffs in a row, know what it's like to fall.

When you're really up against it, self-belief gives way to self-reflection. The Raptors, who plodded around the court, and ran their actions through DeMar DeRozan, the NBA’s last standard-bearer for mid-range basketball, risked going extinct.

Dippin' into the bag of tricks early. #RTZ http://pic.twitter.com/RPgcxw1ZnB

— Toronto Raptors (@Raptors) December 6, 2017

That DeMar's parting offseason admission was that the Raptors were toast without LeBron James, but still entered this season with a renewed ambition to re-tailor his game in order to better serve his teammates, is some kind of beautiful. A beautiful that will not veer into the transcendent but will, over time, pay the bills.

“As a competitor,” says DeMar, “you wanna do every and anything to win. Sometimes, that comes with balance.”

Casey, on the other hand, is on his own mission against instinct: biting his tongue, as the Raptors hodgepodge of young talent works through their early kinks.

There's Pascal Siakam, busting out overzealous spin moves, taking threes early in the shot clock, dribbling around the world like an oversized Fred VanVleet, bobbling behind-the-back passes in transition. There's Norman Powell, driving into traffic, angles and helpers be damned, while OG Anunoby, fishing for steals, gets back-cut by Courtney Lee again.

“I don't wanna limit myself to just be an energy guy or whatever it might be,” says Siakam. “I want to expand my game, and I'm a hard worker. I started playing basketball late, so I have a lot of things I have to learn.”

To allow reps for Anunoby, Poeltl, VanVleet, Siakam, Powell, and Nogueira, Toronto is employing a 12-man rotation that, at this juncture, isn't showing any signs of tightening. Nobody has a short leash. Everybody's allowed to mess up. After spending three seasons in a row sweating every regular-season loss, the Raptors are finally making like a playoff team and treating it like a breeding ground. Sometimes, you can't act like you've been there until you've actually, you know, been there.

The Raptors, as a result, employ one of the best second units — the best, if you ask CJ Miles — in the NBA. None of the Raptors young guns projects to be a star, but they have helped strike the near-impossible balance of winning now and building for the future.

Bench mob connection. #RTZ http://pic.twitter.com/Gax156Lu03

— Toronto Raptors (@Raptors) December 9, 2017

The team had plenty of reasons not to make it work. DeMar DeRozan and Kyle Lowry, career scorers, would have to shelve inborne habits. The shortened preseason hindered their ability to effectively implement a new system. The toughest stretch of their season came early, when the Raptors, in the absence of immediate results, would likely be most prone to reverting to old habits. They couldn't hit a shot for the first month of the season. DeRozan was overpassing. Lowry struggled to channel the appropriate moments for aggression.

“Training camp was tough because it was short. Trying to institute a new system, I thought, we're not there yet,” recalls Casey. “We really struggled in those exhibition games, and the first few games.”

Wax cynical if you must. But the Raptors persisted. And because of that, they managed to execute the blueprint for change that has left so many other franchise stars on the trading block and coaches unemployed. The task of real, appreciable change is often impossible at worst, and trying at best. The Raptors have done it, they’ve done it well, and they have no designs on reversion.

A Sideline Story

I am writing this, dear friends, to eat crow. Well, first, I have to tell on myself. There was a juncture of my life (read: the past year) where I was truly convinced that Andre Drummond just didn't like basketball. I wasn't the only one, and hey, there was evidence suggesting we were onto something. A tall dude without a lot offensive skill who had his first and only All-Star season in a contract year and then proceeded to fall off dramatically in all manner of non-fantasy stats? It was fishy, to say the least.

It turns out that Drummond had it in him to give a shit. A lot of shits, actually. He spent the offseason doubling his free-throw accuracy, which has settled in at 62 percent, allowing his lumbering frame to attract attention down low without being hacked. That is, combined with an attitudinal shift, why he's averaging four assists per game this season — his career high, prior to that, was one. Even when he isn't being doubled, he's done an excellent job of finding cutters from the high post, when opponents try to cheat on pick and rolls. His defense has been a mixed bag. One-on-one, he can't stay in front of quicker guys and ends up in no man's land when he's matched up against spacier guys. But he's gotten better at shutting down traditional pick and rolls, especially with Stanley Johnson on the court, and he's flicked guards out of the restricted area with ease.

.@AndreDrummond had that 20-20 vision tonight. Check out his 26-point, 22-board evening. #DetroitBasketball http://pic.twitter.com/lfXr6pYSNT

— Detroit Pistons (@DetroitPistons) November 28, 2017

I don't know what the backstory is behind Drummond's resurgence (and Detroit's, for that matter) is. I'll leave that to Lee Jenkins. But what's clear to me now was that I was stereotyping a tall dude. It’s also a reminder that when things aren't right with a player, the explanation is often deeper than what's happening at the surface level.